#yes mia i'll go to sleep soon!!

[astrhae]

2024 economic outlook: rent remains negative. thoughts continue to subsidize presence of good omens. fiscal policy should aim to improve david tennant's flammability, while neil gaiman's tumblr policy should stay the course to maintain mental instability. inflation’s return to target or sanity is unlikely.

here's graph to explain:

[citrusy-lemons]

pancake-cakes

tasm!peter x reader

summary: late night cravings bring out some deeper feelings.

author's note: HOLY SHIT, count on me to go MIA for a month after posting. honestly tho i'm so sorry, i've got school and extracurriculars and projects and shit and i haven't really gotten time to write and my schedule is still super hectic, hopefully i'll be able to get other stuff out soon but no promises :/

let me know what you think? constructive criticism is welcome and please be nice :)

see, the middle of the night wasn't meant for this. it's to sleep and dream and pee.

not for baking a cake without having most ingredients of the cake. but you'd gotten a sudden craving and it was a weekend tomorrow, so bad decisions were inevitable.

did you have a million assignments to do? maybe. but peter also had a million assignments to do and he was still here, so technically, he's also making bad decisions. he was aware of that fact.

mind you he did try to convince you to go back to sleep at first but you wore him down. he didn't put up a big fight, he never did, against you.

he's convinced himself that he was only there to watch over you and make sure you didn't slice a finger or spill the flour, not to help you out with your late night shenanigans. but he was cutting up the strawberries so, really, he didn't have a strong resolve.

"you know, i think that when the box says 'pancake mix' you're supposed to make pancakes," he said, turning to you, who was reading the back of said box.

were you trying to bake a cake in the middle of the night with pancake batter cuz you didn't have the stuff for the cake and didn't want to go to the grocery store to get it? kinda. would peter have gone and got the stuff himself if you'd asked? yes.

"i didn't listen to you the last 17 times, i'm not gonna listen to you now, and besides," you said, pouring the mix into a bowl, "a pancake is just a cake but made on a pan instead of an oven. we're just changing the recipe a bit," you shrugged, like it was obvious and he was the stupid one.

"there are so many things wrong with that sentence, i dont even know where to begin,"

"here's a hint, don't."

you were being mean, you knew that. you didn't mean it. peter knew that. and you knew that peter knew that but you would apologize later. he knew that. he sighed dramatically.

"you wound me,"

you rolled your eyes at that. pretending to be annoyed at him was easy. wiping the smile away from your face when you were around him wasn't.

"if i had a dollar for every time you're wounded, i'd be filthy rich."

he glanced up at you. he knew that that wasn't completely a joke, it had a bittersweet tone to it. was that the reason why you were up at this ungodly hour? peter knew that you'd been stressed lately, he didn't know he had a hand in that.

"hey, you wanna tell me what's up?"

you didn't meet his eye, but you did stop fiddling with the bowl. almost immediately, you grabbed the knife out of his hand, mumbling, "you're cutting them all wrong,"

you both knew that wasn't true. one of the perks of having grown up with may was that peter was a fantastic cook. he'd been doing this sort of stuff forever. you needed to get better at excuses.

he gently laid his hand over yours to stop you and said your name softly, pleadingly. a long pause. you complied.

"it's just that," you started with a sigh, and dropped the knife, "you're my best friend peter, and i know that being spiderman means a lot to you," hesitation creeps up as you get to the actual issue. peter senses a 'but' coming. you look at him.

"but you come home every night with bruises everywhere, in pain, and i know you say that they'll go away in the morning and they do but," you're rambling now, he doesn't stop you.

"you have to see it from my perspective, i-" another sigh, you look away, "i get scared, peter."

oh. you were worried for him. he wonders how he didn't realise that before. that time he came home with a stab wound and you looked like you were going to cry he thought you were nauseous at the sight of blood. peter was an idiot.

"i know i shouldn't but i dont like the thought of you getting beat up every night." you were talking with your hands now, "imagine how you would feel if i came home with bruises all over my body and told you not to worry and that i'll be fine in a couple hours." you looked at him again. there was a sort of pain in your eyes. peter wishes it weren't there.

"it doesn't feel good peter. and you assume that i'm supposed to be okay with it?" you took a deep breath and closed your eyes, turning back to the strawberries. your hands were shaking.

peter thought about it. about what you'd said. you were scared for him and he understood that. it couldn't have been easy to be with someone like him. but he couldn't very well abandon spiderman. it was a part of him now. he knew that you knew that, but at the same time, he understood your point.

he thought about how he'd feel if the roles were reversed. if you came home with the type of wounds he did every night, he would be terrified. he couldn't blame you, of course he couldn't.

but he was spiderman, he had a responsibility, an unspoken vow to this city. he had opportunities and powers that no one else did, and he wanted to do good with it.

he hadn't asked for it, but he still had it. if he gave up being spiderman, he didn't think his conscience would let him live with it.

"i'm not asking you not to be spiderman," you spoke, finding your voice, "of course i won't do that. i'm just saying..." you trailed off, unsure of what you wanted and whether you were allowed to have it.

peter took both your hands into his, silently begging you to look at him. you did.

"i know what you're saying, and i understand. i don't blame you, i get where you're coming from and i promise, i'll be fine," he said, softly. he knew you were anxious about his safety.

"i can't give up being spiderman, and i know that's not what you're saying, but you have to understand, i can't not do it, it's a part of me, and i swear i will be more careful," his brown eyes bore into yours, willing you to understand. you blinked and unconsciously looked to the floor.

"but what if, being careful isn't enough one day? what if it isn't just some robbers or burglars but some other things? what if it's one of those aliens or mutants or something and you can't defend yourself? what am i supposed to do then, pete?"

you closed your eyes again, trying to stop the tears. peter's heart was tearing itself knowing that he was the reason for them. how could he tell you that him being the cause for your tears hurt more than any knife in the world?

"hey, look at me," he said, searching for your eyes. you shook your head but looked up at him anyway, the tears in your lashes resolutely not giving in to gravity.

"nothing is going to happen to me. i've handled stuff like that, you know. i know you're worried and upset but i promise, nothing will happen. you need to trust me, okay? we're going to be fine. please, I need you to trust me."

he said your name like it's the last time he'll ever get to, not in a way a friend is supposed to.

you sniffed, "i trust you, i do. it's this city that i don't trust," you steeled yourself, "but if you're sure, and you believe we'll be fine, then i do too."

he cracked a smile then, and pulled you in for a hug. a tight one. neither of you let go for quite a few minutes. you relished in it.

"god, okay i know i'm being silly, i'm sorry," you said after you'd pulled away, rubbing at your eyes.

"you're not being silly, don't be sorry. it's completely okay and valid. don't ridicule your thoughts, you're allowed to feel," peter said, in a scold-ish manner that he'd no doubt learnt from may.

"and please step away from the strawberries, and go back to butchering your so-called 'cake'," he said with a teasing smile, bumping his hips into yours to move you back to the bowl of pancake mix.

you scoffed incredulously, back into your playful demeanor, "excuse you, i would have perfected this pancake-cake if i weren't feeling sleepy right now, so, unfortunately for you, you won't get to taste this deliciousness, whenever i do get to make it,"

"oh, what a tragedy, i won't get to torture my tastebuds with whatever concoction you manage to brew up,"

you shoved at him, not that he moved an inch, and grabbed the plate of cut strawberries.

"just for that, i'm gonna eat these strawberries in bed using your pillow as a table, and you know i can be a very messy eater," you laughed like an evil sorcerer and ran towards the bedroom.

peter, horrified at the thought of sleeping on a sticky pillow, ran after you, forgetting that he had sticky hands himself. (pun intended, i'm sorry i couldn't not do it)

"come back here you!"

the pancake mix in the bowl, the half pack of strawberries waiting to be cut, and the anxiety were all left forgotten back in the kitchen.

[lllivia]

Unexpected turn of events

Wednesday Addams x fem!reader

Could be read as gn!reader

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°★.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°★.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆

"Pleaseee"

"no."

"Pretty pleasee"

"no."

"Pretty please with a cherry on top"

"fine."

Wednesday scowled finally letting you win the argument of you bothering her to be able to sleep in her bed with her after you had been begging her for nearly twenty minutes.

"as long as you don't come anywhere near me. I know how needy you can be."

She said looking up from your homework she had (tried) helping you with. You were grinning at her, it may be the biggest smile she had ever seen coming from you. Annoyed Wednesday couldn't help to find you adorable, the way your dimples stood so much out for anyone to see, and how your eyes glittered with different colors from the big window on the other side of the dorm.

Later that night after getting your pj's from your room you were falling asleep. Your eye lashes fluttering trying to stay awake, while Wednesday was still sitting at her dark desk, writing in her beloved novel.

"Are you done yet Wen?

"yes soon, just sleep cara mia. I'll be there when you wake up"

"Ok good night Wednesday"

"Sleep well lovely"

Feeling reassured you finally drifted off to sleep, dreaming about your beautiful future wife.

You woke up the next morning sweating profusely, a warm heavy feeling on top of you. Opening your eyes you were met with Wednesday's slightly drooling face using your chest as a pillow. Snoring lightly her arms were wrapped tightly around your body like you were to disappear if she ever let go. You smiled brightly down at her, looking forward to tease her about it when she woke up. Sneakily you moved your arm from under hers to reach for your phone, and immediately going to the photo app. After snapping maybe thirty pictures or so of you making faces to the camera with your girlfriend sleeping soundly on top of you, you saw her pale arm flash out at the speed of light. Grabbing your phone and pulling it from your grasp, you jumping slightly looking to see Wednesday already glaring at you.

"if you don't delete those pictures right this second I will skin you alive and feed you to every unsuspecting student in this goddamned school."

💗 Masterlist 💗

[tillthelandslide]

Insufferable Arsehole Part 8: When We Are Together - Matty Healy Series

A/N: sooo you may have seen my poll, you may not have, but I've come to the decision to post what I have written for this series and then take a little break from it... I love this series but recently have been feeling a bit stuck with it, I have so many ideas but I'm sure where they fit and whether there even is an end to this story. My goal is to eventually finish it so don't worry! I hope you guys are okay with that. The support has been amazing so thank you all so much.

In other news (for my Ross girlies) I will be posting the first chapter to my new series, entitled Pressure, very soon!

Warnings: bit long, probably spelling mistakes

Series Masterlist

Part 7

Lou's phone ringing on her bedside table is what stirs her from her peaceful slumber. The dozing man next to her awakens with a groan as she awkwardly untangles her limbs from him, apologising for the loud interference as she removes herself from the bed. His soft features find hers and he smiles before his eyes are drifting shut once more. She quickly throws on his shirt which rests on the ground amongst the rest of their clothes.

She stubs her toe on the bedside table as she grabs her phone, the name "Rose" lights up her screen, a picture of her and the drummer of her band can be seen.

"Fuck" she says attempting to shake of the pain, Matty mumbles a "you alright love?" His face now buried in his pillow.

"Yeah go back to sleep" she says, answering the phone, covering up the speaker until she's on their balcony. The morning breeze is far too cold and considering she's just wearing Matty's Tshirt, she'd be surprised if she didn't get frostbite.

"Lou, are you there?" She hears her friend say.

"Yes I'm here sorry" she looks at her phone seeing the clock said 5am, she puts the phone back to her ear 

"Rose I love you but it's 5 in the morning, what time is it there?" She asks, not keeping a track of what time it is in her home town like she usually would.

"That doesn't matter, what matters is that I've just seen pictures of you and Matty holding hands and cuddling. Last time we spoke you said you're seeing how things go" she explains. Shit  they did get caught she thinks , it's fine Matty said we will deal with the consequences together.

"That's exactly what I'm doing, Rose. Seeing how things go, I'm not filtering myself for anyone, I'll do what I want and that's exactly what Im doing" she explains. Rose chuckles on the other end of the line, Lou's words perfectly described herself, never one to filter herself for the sake of others.

"We respect that, you know we do. One of the things we love most about you... We're just worried you're going to get hurt" Rose explains, Rose was one of the most genuine people she had ever met, she was similar to Hann in the fact she would say it how it is although perhaps a little more carelessly and sometimes brutally than Hann.

"We? So you've spoken to Mia and Cami too... Great'' she says, eyes rolling. Mia was the band's bassist (and her sister) and Cami was their lead guitarist.

"I mean... Mia is blindly happy for you, you know what she's like" Rose says.

Mia is around 5 years younger than Lou (having joined the band reasonably late, a fact that Ross and Lou had jokingly argued about as the band didn't have a bassist for a while), they had always been close but one thing they loved about their relationship was they weren't dependent on each other. Despite spending all her time with the 1975 in her childhood, only George had met her band members, they weren't very interested in becoming friends with them, far too happy in doing their own thing.

Mia lived in London for almost all of their childhood, they'd only see each other during holidays or special occasions, something about that dynamic made them closer (which most people found odd). Mia had played bass since she was around 8 and she had joined the band 5 years after they got famous.

"I love her... She's my sister and all but she'd be happy if I found a penny on the floor" Lou says making Rose chuckle, knowing it was true. Despite having different Mum's, their families always encouraged the sisters to appreciate life intricacies, the small things.

"We're just looking out for you L" she says, the nickname only her band members gave her. She remembers the first time George visited the band on tour during one of the 75s breaks, he practically cringed at the nickname, she was and always would be his "Lou" and the fact others had different nicknames for her didn't sit too well at first.

"I know" she says, knowing they never did anything with less than pure intentions. "but listen... We're a family here, if anything happens they'll protect me" she says, not that she needed protecting. Rose finds her heart sinking slightly at her friend's words, as if their own band weren't a family. But she saw the way Lou was with the 75, how undoubtedly happy she was and she knew to push the selfish thought down.

"You seem really happy" Rose finally says and Lou smiles at that.

"I am..." She can't help but smile widely. She could easily go on to tell Rose how she's having the time of her life, how she's never felt this happy, how something feels different with the guys (something she has been struggling to explain), how Matty makes her feel seen and loved (something no guy has come close to before). But she doesn't, wanting it to be her secret for now.

"I'm also really fucking cold right now" she laughs, goosebumps rising to her skin as the wind makes Matty's shirt blow around her.

"Why?" Rose is laughing at her then.

"I'm on a balcony"

"why?" She's asking again, the two of them laughing.

"Matty's asleep... Like I said it's 5am" she says and she hears her friend sigh on the other end of the line, a happy sigh.

"Matty aye? Sharing a room are you?"

"Shut up" she chuckles. Her voice lowers and she whispers her next words "he told me he loved me Rose".

"Wow. That's big" she says and Lou's nodding even though Rose can't see her.

"Do you love him?" Rose asks, already suspecting the answer.

"Yeah"

"Well shit... Guess we're coming to the next show then. Got to see what Matthew Healy is like nowadays. Can't be the same old Ratty you used to kick about with" she says making Lou laugh loudly.

"I miss you guys" she says, the 1975 were her family, everything was intense. But with her own band she had fun (not that she didn't with the boys) but it was different.

"Is George still as fit as the good old days?" She asks and Lou can't help but laugh again.

"Pack it in, you know he's in a happy, healthy relationship" Lou explains.

"Too bad, don't know how you didn't jump his bones every time you were with him"

"Ew... Just ew. He's like my brother"

"And that Ross.... Damn. And I hear hanns going to be a daddy? That's hot."

"Okay Rose I'm hanging up now" Lou says and with two I love yous, she's slipping back into their room, seeing Matty awake and scrolling through his phone, smiling down at the screen.

"You know we look quite cute in these pictures" he says, eyes meeting hers. She's quick to jump on the bed, chin hooking onto his shoulder to peek at his screen. They did look cute and more importantly they looked happy. She smiles as Matty screenshots the photos.

"Deal with the consequences together, yeah?" Matty says, Lou nods at him, smiling as his lips press against hers.

"The first of which will be a very angry Jamie... And probably Gregg too" she says, Matty scrunching up his nose in agreement.

"Yeah...." His voice trails off making her giggle.

"I don't care... I'm happy"

"Me too love" he says, another kiss being delivered to her mouth.

"Rose called, think her and the girls want to come to the next show" she explains and Matty nods, typing something on his phone to Jamie, asking him to sort out their travel and to save them three tickets.

"Thank you" she says.

"If I remember correctly... They don't like me all that much do they?" He says and she's the one furrowing her nose at him, shaking her head.

"Guess I'll have to prove them wrong" and she almost dies at those words, lips harshly pressing against his. He groans as he pushes against her, her back hitting the bed.

"You're insatiable" he says, making her nod as her hands pull him in by the hips, forcing them to come into contact with hers in a sharp grind. She quickly finds him hard and resting against his abdomen and it doesn't take long before he's inside her.

"Jesus Christ" he groans, throwing his head back as her hands interweave into his curls. He's never going to get used to this.

----------------------------------------------------------

"You're supposed to tell me shit like this before you just decide to do it" Jamie says, his voice raised slightly, not shouting but firm and pointed.

Matty was standing in the centre of the room. George, Hann, Ross, John, and Jamie were all watching from the opposite side of the room, each of their arms crossed, ready to defend the pair if they needed to.

Carly (who had arrived this morning) and Polly were seated next to Lou on a large leather sofa.

"Come on man! It's not that big of a deal, we were holding hands, not making out" Matty says and Lou can't help but smirk.

"You know we have rules" Jamie says, making Matty (and all the boys scoff)

"I mean he's done worse" George says and Jamie whips around to see him, his finger pointing at the large man. Lou can't help but chuckle.

"Don't you start" and then he's turning to her now and her smile drops "and you"

"How am I supposed to explain this to your manager huh? How are we supposed to explain this to the fans?" Jamie asks. He was never really one to worry about these kinds of things, things were usually very chilled with him, it was one of the reasons the guys loved having him as their manager.

"Is it really that big of a deal?" Lou asks, Matty's eyes find hers and soften.

"Jamie listen" Lou says and the boy's manager finds her eyes and then soften, he had grown to have a soft spot for her "ignore Matty for a second" she says making everyone including the curly haired man laugh.

"When have I ever done anything problematic?" She asks and Jamie can't think of a single time, she was a saint (in the eyes of their fans anyway, Matty knew what she was truly like behind closed doors).

"We will do whatever you and Gregg want us to do... We just got caught up in the moment, okay?" Lou says and Jamie smiles at that, appreciating her words.

"You know what... Do whatever... We will deal with it" Jamie then says, almost completely giving in. The whole group smiled at that, the spirits lifted almost immediately. He goes to leave the room, turning back at the last minute.

"You're both serious about this right? This isn't some fuck around?" Jamie asks, already knowing the answer but wanting to confirm. They both share a look before looking at him again. They nod and he smiles.

"Well... Good" he says before leaving.

George hugs Matty as Lou is hugged by both Carly and Polly. She hadn't gotten much time to spend with the girls so when Matty's eyes found hers, although he wants nothing more than to spend time with her, he lets her have her own time with them.

"Look at you, you're glowing" Lou says, smiling at her friend. Carly smiles back at her thinking the same thing about Lou.

"How are you feeling? Can I get you anything?" Her words are rushed and Carly laughs, as does Poly.

"Lou calm down, I'm fine. Thank you though" she says sweetly. They continue talking and at some point Poly leaves them and soon after Hann joins, hooking a protective arm around his wife as his other hand toys with his wedding band. Lou always cries at the sight, feeling awfully sentimental today.

The couple stare at each other for a few seconds, smiles resting on their lips before they're both turning to look at her.

"Why are you both looking at me like that?" Lou asks, making them laugh.

"We've been meaning to ask you something" Adam says, words quiet so only the three of them could hear.

"We were wondering," Carly says, looking at her husband before looking at Lou again.

"When the baby is born... If you'd be godmother" Carly says and as skin as the words come out, tears are springing to Lou's eyes.

"Wh-what?" She stutters, completely unsure why they'd ask her of all people, she appreciates it nonetheless but is very confused.

"Truth is we wouldn't even be married if it wasn't for you" Adam says.

"That's not true" Lou says and Carly raises her eyebrows at her.

"Regardless... You've always been so welcoming of me, and so so supportive. And whenever I'm here, you're always the first to check up on me and the baby" Carly speaks, hands resting over her bunk as Adam nods next to her.

"You don't have to say yes. We'd just love it if you did.  You know what you mean to us" Hann says and Lou is pulling them both into a tight hug, careful of the bump resting between them.

"I'd be honoured"

----------------------------------------------------------

The next evening Lou is pacing backstage at another venue, anxiously awaiting the arrival of her band of which included her baby sister (definitely not a baby but oh well). They had planned something special for this show, seeing as her bandmates were going to be there, the boys asked her to sing a song on her own, any song she liked.

"Lou you're making me anxious, stop pacing" George says, leisurely chilling on one of the sofas, Matty sitting next to him, a smirk resting on his face.

"Why are you smirking?" She quips at the man, who's curls have been tamed by an obscene amount of hair gel.

"Like seeing you like this, it's cute" he says, pulling her into his lap as she walks past them, stopping her pacing altogether.

"That's better" Matty says, making Lou giggle as he swarms her neck with light pecks.

"Absolutely disgusting" George says, standing to leave the pair of them.

"He's just jealous," Lou says, making Matty nod.

"Why are you anxious darling?" Matty says, nudging his nose lightly against hers.

"I haven't seen them in a while, I've missed them like crazy and I'm just.... I'm worried they're going to see what I'm like with you guys... And like hate me or something" Lou admits.

"You're crazy" Matty says, laughing at her "I don't know how many times I have to tell you love, but no one could hate you" he says, his words so simple but completely easing her thoughts.

"I love you" she says freely now, the man smiles widely down at her, pressing his mouth to hers sweetly.

"I love you more"

They hear a door open behind them, Lou jumping from her place in his lap, turning around to see three women standing in the hallway with Jamie. One of which runs towards her, screaming loudly, she jumps and Lou catches her as she laughs.

"Oh my god Mia you're not a child, I can't carry you anymore" Lou says, struggling to hold her sister up.

"I have fucking missed you bro" Mia says as she's placed back down, punching her older sister in the arm.

"Ouch" Lou says, all of the boys watch with their mouths open. Lou was talking to someone who looked almost identical to her, although her sister's hair was much lighter than hers and shorter too, her skin slightly paler, far less tattoos covering her body.

Rose and Cami are pulling her into a tight hug next, the four of them nattering like a bunch of mothers waiting to pick up their kids.

"Oh shit. Sorry" Lou turns to the guys who are still watching, mouth agape at the four of them. George is quick to stand up, pulling them all into hugs, muttering "long them no sees" to each of them.

"Of course you know George..." Lou says as she begins to introduce the guys. Every single one of them fawns over the man, making her roll her eyes, pointing her fingers at them, telling them to stop which makes George laugh. He knew they did it on purpose, to get under Lou's skin but he can't help but let it get to his ego too.

George wraps up Mia in a hug "how's my favourite sister doing?" He asks just to annoy Lou.

"Ha ha very funny" Lou says, pushing her best friend lightly as he wraps his arm around her too.

"This is Ross, Adam but we call him Hann, Carly: Adam's wife and mother of his unborn child" she says pointing to each of them, making everyone laugh at her words about Carly. She doesn't mention that she's going to be the child's godmother, wanting to savour that fact for a while.

"Penny, Jamie, John and... Matty" she's smiling at them and all the girls smile at everyone introduced, waving at them. The girls can't help but notice how Matty stares at her, his eyes set on no one else but her, a huge smile resting on his mouth. One look and they could see he was smitten.

"This is Rose our drummer, Cami our lead guitarist and my little sister Mia, who's our bassist" she smiles as she speaks, hooking her arm around Mia at the last instance.

"How did I not know you had a sister?" It's Matty who's speaking, almost all of the girls scowling at him, apart from Mia. He shares a look with the other guys, all of them shrugging, all of them knew she had a sister (although only George had met her) , how the fact had escaped the attention of Matty they did not know. He feels awful that he doesn't know, and wonders why he hadn't told her.

"Don't talk about me then sis? Oh how you wound me" her sister says, making her laugh and nudge her.

"Na, just kidding, it's all good. I lived in London, same dad, different mum" Mia explains, coming to pull Matty into a hug to properly introduce herself. Lou stands there watching them, finger in-between teeth as she watches how Matty freezes up awkwardly, the scene makes her chuckle.

"Mia stop being weird" she says, pulling her sister back from Matty.

The rest of them talk then, the girls talking to various people at scattered times. Mia stands with Matty and Lou, catching up about all sorts of things. Rose and Cami talk to Ross, Hann and Carly.

"Who's the one with the bun again?" Mia asks and Lou rolls her eyes as Matty smirks, knowing exactly why she's asking.

"That would be Ross, OUR bassist' ' Matty says, smirk clear on his face. His arm was wrapped tightly around Lou's waist, holding him to her. Mia thought they looked cute together and she couldn't help but smile at the huge smile resting on her older sister's face. She had never seen her this happy before.

"That's Ross?!" Mia almost shouts, catching the attention of the tall bearded man.

"Shut up" Lou says, Mia and her share a look, confusing Matty slightly. Mia was one of the only people that knew Lou and Ross shared a kiss when they were teenagers for they told each other everything.

"He's gotten a lot fitter than when you knocked about with them" Mia says, her London accent a lot more prominent as she speaks.

"You need to stop" Lou says, Matty and her laughing at the slightly smaller girl. Matty's eyes flick between them, eyebrows raising.

"Sorry I can't get over how similar you look, you seriously have different mum's? " Matty says, making them both groan.

"Oh god don't say that"  they say in unison, Matty holds his hands up in surrender at the daggers they shoot.

"Forget I mentioned it" he's being pulled away by someone else then. Leaving the two sisters alone.

"I mean... I like him" Mia says, grasping her sister by the shoulders. Rose joins their conversation.

"That's because you didn't see how completely unbearable he was when we were kids" Rose says, beer in hand that Lou is completely unsure how she got.

"Alright Rose we get it. Give the poor guy a chance, people change" Cami speaks and Lou is thankful to her.

"So tell us, are the rumours true?" Rose then asks.

"What rumours?" Lou asks, eyebrows furrowing at her bandmate.

"The rumours when we were kids.... That he's a good shag" rose says, always one to be forefront with her questions, something which often got them into trouble.

"You know what, you carry on mingling, I need a fag" Lou chuckles before finding her way out of one of the side doors, she hears them all laughing behind her.

The cigarette quickly finds its place in-between her lips, lighter sparking, the end burning as she breathes it in. She hears the door open and then shut behind her but she doesn't turn. She doesn't need to, she can smell two familiar scents: one of the man she loved and one of her life long best friend.

There's a silence for a few seconds as they light their own cigarettes, Matty's arm hooking around her waist when he sees her shiver.

"Sorry Lou but your sister is fitter than the last time I saw her" George says, making her cringe and making Matty chuckle.

"Ew. Just ew. And you have a girlfriend" Lou says simply, she doesn't miss how Matty leans in whispering a "you're fitter" into her ear. It's kind of a weird compliment, she never once compared herself to her sister, but she can't deny the way his words make her thighs tighten. She suppose it's because he's the one saying it and she's the one he wants when there's plenty of other beautiful girls, including the ones back inside, who he could easily get.

"They seem nice" Matty then says, loud enough for them both to hear.

"They are. But they're fucking mental though. Sorry if Rose is a bitch to you, her heart is in the right place" Lou explains, talking to Matty now, ignoring her best friend.

"It's okay, I get it. I was a dick remember?" Matty asks and Lou and George nod at him, all three of them laughing at his words.

"Cami is an absolute sweetheart so you don't have to worry about anything with her... Maybe just" she turns to Matty, placing a hand on her chest "watch what you say" this makes George laugh.

"And Mia... Keep her away from Ross will you? She's small but she will break that man" Lou says, her words shocking the two men, making them laugh anyway.

"Really?" George says, raising his eyebrows "maybe he needs to be broken" and Lou is groaning at his words.

"Don't you even try George" she says, the man flicking his fag to the floor, running back inside, giggling like an absolute child.

"George!" She shouts, giving in when the door swings back. She turns back to Matty then, who is smiling widely at her. His curls have once again been tamed by an unruly amount of hair gel, she almost frowns at the fact she can't run her fingers through the strands.

"Remind me why you didn't tell me you had a sister?" He asks and she frowns at him, thinking of an answer, not really having a definite one.

"Hmmm... I dunno. Guess I never thought to tell you before... And now... Think I was too wrapped up in you to tell you" she says, feeling a bit bad that she hadn't mentioned her own sister.

"As much as I love that... Told you I wanted to know everything about you" he says and she nods.

"I know... You'll get to know her now though, she loves you already so you definitely don't have to worry about her" she seals her words with a brief kiss.

"You seem different around them" Matty admits, making her eyebrows furrow, not knowing whether the meaning behind his words was a good or bad difference.

"How?" She asks, he smooths his hands over her waist, pulling her closer as his back leans against the concrete of the wall.

"You're like the leader of their pack, they all look to you, you shine" he admits and his eyes sparkle as he speaks "like seeing you shine". She doesn't quite know what to say but opts for the truth.

"I've actually been enjoying not being the frontman for a bit... Happy to be in the background and bask in your light" she says, his heart flutters at her words.

"Oh honey..." His fingers tucking a piece of hair behind her ear that had fallen, choosing to gently grip her chin instead of dropping back to his side.

"You've got your own light, even at the back... Everyone's looking at you" he says and she doesn't believe his words. She had a few of her own fans come to their gigs but the majority were there to see the boys and Matty, of course because it was their show, she was just there to help. She shakes her head at him, making him chuckle.

"Wish you could see yourself the way I see you... The way thousands of people see you. Trust me darling... You shine" he seals his lips against hers now, not letting her utter another word. His words had some truth to them that she didn't see, the guys often found themselves watching her even on that stage, she radiated something more than any of them could give.

And Matty especially couldn't take his eyes off her, she was everything, up on that stage, in a coffee shop, amongst friends, under the covers in their room: she shined.

Their lips move passionately against each other, neither able to get enough of each other. He's pulling her as she pulls him, trying to get closer even though it wasn't possible.

Neither of them had spoken about the fact that in two days they would be at the end of the first leg of their tour. They'd been setting off on a three week break, every single person had made plans except the two of them, too wrapped up in each other to have spoken about it.

The door creaks open next to them and they hear someone cough. They pull apart, both looking to see sweet Cami standing there.

"They're calling you on stage" Lou appreciates that she makes no crude comments, and doesn't groan at the sight of them.

They leave to play then, the crowd like no other tonight. She doesn't know if it's because she has her bandmates and her sister here or maybe because things are going so well with Matty, but the smile on her face never leaves. They play song after song, each one better than the last and when the second half rolls round and Matty introduces them, he surprises her.

"So we have two more shows after this one... And then we're on a three week break" he mentions it now and suddenly it dawns on her.

" I haven't made any plans... I've been a little distracted..." He says, looking over to her, making the crowd go mental "the truth is I've been having the time of my life with someone truly truly amazing and I'm the happiest I've ever been" he says. She thinks that his words are good enough for her for now, that's all the fans really need to know.

"This tour... We had someone amazing join us... I wasn't overjoyed at first, everyone on this stage right now would tell you that... Including her, especially her" he says and they all chuckle to themselves, Lou's eyes never wavering from his.

"But my god... George" he says turning around to face his best mate "thank you" he says, hands flat against each other, raising them to his chin as he tilts his head.

"Thank you to these boys right here" he says, pointing to Hann, George and then Ross "for making the best decision ever and bringing this wonderful person on tour with us" Matty says, finally pointing to her. Some fans may think he's just being sentimental, thanking her for joining them this far. Some will know the true meaning to his words, all but confirming what they were.

"Our wonderful Lou, would you come here for a second please?" He asks, and exactly as they planned she walks over to him, smiling as he pulls her into a tight hug before they pull back, his hand resting on her shoulder.

"Now you've got an absolute treat tonight" Matty says and someone passes her, her acoustic guitar. Matty moves from his stool and lets her sit there.

"The amazing Lou everyone" he says before he's leaving, everyone leaves the stage then, joining the girls backstage and watching from the sidelines.

"God this is daunting" she says into the microphone, making the crowd laugh "Yeah I know this is my job but I haven't been up here on my own for a hot minute" they laugh again.

She's shining again Matty thinks, god he loved how she shines.

"Boys please come back" she says, everyone laughing again.

"Okay okay" she says, shaking her nerves off as she begins checking if the guitar is in tune.

"I need to say a couple of things before I start, unplanned I know" she says, saying her last words to the guys on the side of the stage.

"Can't let Matty say all that without me saying anything" she laughs and she sees him smile at her.

"My band is here tonight" the crowd screams "my little sister"

"And I can't remember a time where I felt as happy as I do now. We're a family here at the 1975... I know that more than anything else" she says her words making the boy's eyes fill with tears.

"I guess I just want to say thank you to the whole team... And to my four boys, you know I'm not the best with words so I've been wanting to do something to show you guys how much you mean to me instead. So I thought I'd sing you a beautiful song. One which you wrote. This is for you" she says, beginning to play the beginning chords to "When We Are Together".

She plays a stripped back version of the song, somehow making it more sentimental, the boys find themselves hugging each other backstage.

Matty stares at her intently as she sings, the voice he loves so much filling the entire arena, he's in awe that the entire audience is silent, simply listening to her sing.

"You ask about the cows, wearin' my sweater

It's somethin' 'bout the weather that makes them lie down

The only time I feel I might get better is when we are together" she sings, her voice soft and sweet, undeniably beautiful.

She sings the song to the end, only then looking up at the audience. Her own eyes glisten with tears that are yet to fall but they do when she sees everyone holding up their phone, a few people crying their own tears. The boys are quick to join her on stage, hugging her tightly in a group hug before they return to their places on the stage.

"I love you" Matty mouths to her making her smile and mouth an "I love you too" back. Neither caring that thousands of people were watching them.

----------------------------------------------------------

George somehow ropes them all into a night out. Explaining that they hadn't had one yet despite being nearly at the end of their first leg. It was a rare occurrence for the band not to have had one, but they had all agreed that until they were all settled they wouldn't have a crazy night out.

But as the first leg was coming to an end, they had all agreed it was much needed and well deserved. Plus, the addition of Lou's bandmates had them all in high spirits.

"Got to give the newbies a proper 75 welcome" Ross says, wrapping an arm around Lou, pulling her into his side.

"Hey I'm not a newbie anymore" she argues back, jokingly shoving the man above her, shrugging away from his grip.

"But you haven't been out with us losers since we were teenagers" he quips back and she can't argue with that.

So they all rushed back to their hotel, the girls taking up Lou's room which was yet to be touched. Matty frowns as she disappears between the doors, leaving him to get ready on his own. Lou quickly showers, slicks back her hair into a high pony and applies some make up, not too much on her face but a dark eye, before joining the girls back in her room, wrapped up in a white robe.

"Feel like seeing how much that man has the hots for you?" Cami says, making Lou laugh as she searches through her suitcase. The girls seemed to have come prepared, suspecting that a night out would be on the agenda.

"We're not going anywhere fancy Cami, George knows some dj at this club and they've got us a booth" she explains, failing to mention that it was in the VIP section, something she didn't like to brag about. Cami holds up a silk dress with a deep v and a high slit, Lou shakes her head "too fancy".

Cami mutters an "okay okay" before she proceeds to throw more things from her suitcase, a mischievous look on her face as she puts together a few items.

One of which is a skirt that is far too short even for Lou, she had thrown all sorts of items in there, some of which she hadn't worn in ages.

"Cami that skirt it so fucking short" Lou says, unsure about it, and the slit that revealed half her thigh. Cami proceeds to throw the skirt at her, along with a deep v lace bodysuit and a cropped blazer.

"Just try it on" she says, the other girls nodding. Lou sighs deeply.

"Don't encourage her" she says, pointing to the other girls.

She makes her way to the en-suite bathroom, removing her robe before putting on the assortment of clothes Cami had selected. She finds herself smirking at her reflection, her ego was far from big but she knew that one look from Matty and he'd be on his knees.

She makes her way back into the room, her bandmates gasping at her.

"That's it. That's the one. I'm a genius" Cami says, placing a kiss on each of her cheeks.

"I'd do you" Rose says, making them all laugh, her fingertips pluck the "M" necklace that rests against the centre of her chest, just falling in-between her boobs. Rose smiles and lifts an eyebrow.

"Can't lie... That's undeniably cute" she says and Lou smiles.

"I know I give him shit... And I will continue to until I see fit" rose says making Lou laugh "but it's obvious he's madly in love with you... And you seem really happy" she says and Lou nods at her.

"I am... I don't even remember what it was like before... I hated him because I thought he hated me... As soon as I found out he didn't, everything kind of just fell in to place" Lou explains, mia standing up to hug her sister.

The other girls get ready after that, Lou helping them do their hair and make up, hearing the guys laughing from outside.

Rose wears a simple black dress that sits tightly on her body, Cami settles for a black pair of skinny jeans and a lace bralette, whilst Mia adorns leather trousers and black one shoulder bodysuit.

"You guys are going to give them heart attacks," Lou says, making all the girls laugh.

They then make their way into the main room, Lou the last to leave, before she does she hears George say "Was wondering why you took so long but now I understand. Look lovely girls" he says, his words fairly tame in comparison to what she'd thought he'd say.

"Where's the woman of the hour?" He jokes before she steps into the threshold. Her eyes find Mattys almost instantly and she can't help but smirk at him.

He was sitting on one of the sofas, legs spread wide almost as if he's ready for her to take her place in them. He shoots up as soon as he sees her, tugging at the shirt that rests almost uncomfortably around his neck now.

He's dressed in black suit trousers, a plain white T Shirt tucked in with a black shirt thrown over the top, the buttons almost all undone except two at the bottom, the shirt is sheer and she holds back moan as she sees him. His hair isn't tamed by gel now, unruly curls sat atop his head, ready to be tugged.

"Damnnn" George says, hand reaching for hers and getting his best friend to do a twirl, which makes her laugh. She didn't notice Matty coming over to her but she sure as hell notices the look he gives George, one in which she had never seen before.

His eyes warned his best friend to watch his mouth and George instantly stepped away, he was being territorial and she was surprised with how much she liked the feeling.

"Baby..." He practically whispers, hands coming to find her waist, gently pulling her body to his, his touch is unsure, as if he thought he wasn't deserving of it. Behind them, everyone begins talking to each other, letting the couple be.

"You look..." He swallows deeply and the sight kills her. She's glad her outfit had the outcome she had desired but as his dark eyes find hers she finds herself lost for words. Her eyebrows raise up at him, begging him to finish his sentence.

"Devine..." He says, as if she's a meal to devour. She couldn't care in the slightest, she loved how he much he wanted her and how little he tried to hide it.

"Hmm" she says, hands flat against his chest, she doesn't even beginning to describe how good he looks before George is interrupting them.

"We should probably leave before these two start fucking" George says, making everyone chuckle.

The club is loud and George disappears the minute they arrive, talking to the DJ of the night who lets George take rein of the music for a bit. The others find themselves at their booth, drinks already waiting for them.

Matty's hand is firmly clasped on her thigh as his other arm hooks around the back of her. His hand comes to fit at the back of her neck and she finds herself loving the feel of it. His grasp wasn't too tight but wasn't exactly soft and she has to stop herself from pressing her lips against his.

Ross is sat opposite them talking to Mia, her hand rests on his knee as they talk over the loud music. Cami and Rose are already on the dance floor, laughing with each other as they danced and drank.

He leans into speak to her, having to place his mouth directly next to her ear for her to hear "saw about 6 different guys stare at you as we walked in love" he says, almost proud of the fact.

"Yeah?" She asks and he smirks.

"Don't blame them, you look fucking hot" he says, making her chuckle and lean into him.

"Bet it must feel nice knowing I'm yours huh?" She asks and his smirk falls, mouth agape for a beat before his lips find hers for a firm peck.

"You're not mine yet love, not really. You could go over to any one of them right now and do what you wanted" he speaks and she smiles at him, shaking her head at his words. His words which were just to test her. He wanted nothing more than for her to say his words weren't true.

"Its shame for them then isn't it?" She says making his eyebrows furrow, not knowing what she meant.

"Shame I want you and not them" she says, standing from the booth, hand finding his as she stands.

"Besides" she says, leaning down to him until her mouth grazes his ear, making him shiver "if I'm not yours... you should do something about that" she says before looking at Mia.

"Want to dance?" She asks and Mia smiles widely, standing almost instantly. Lou notices the clear frown on Ross' lips and she smiles, raising her eyebrows at the bearded man.

The two girls quickly make their way to the dance floor positioning themselves so they can be seen by the guys (who's eyes never leave them).

Ross and Cami are quick to find them, the four of them dancing with each other, laughing and drinking.

Lou feels a tap to her shoulder so she turns, looking up at a guy who she doesn't recognise, a 6 ft something guy who, if she wasnt completely smitten with Matty she would find attractive, he had curls too but they weren't the same as Matty's, he looks sweet, a we'll put together man who no doubt has a large sum to his name. She stands there awkwardly waiting for the man to speak.

"Sorry I saw you across the room and just had to say hi" he speaks the cliche line and she chuckles.

"Does that line usually work for you?" She shouts over the loud song that's playing, the girls behind her laughing.

"I don't know, it's the first time I'm using it, you tell me" he says smoothly and Lou chuckles again.

"Ah come on Lou, let him buy you a drink" Rose says and she knows she just wants to see Matty's reaction.

"Lou? Is that your name? A pretty name for a pretty girl" he says and she can't help but cringe a little.

"I'm actually here with-" she begins to say she's here with someone but is interrupted by rose again.

"No she's not, she's just being modest, buy her a drink, a martini" she says and Lou chuckles as they man smiles before leaving.

"I hate martinis" Lou says and rose smirks.

"I know, but I love them" she says leaning in to speak into her ear "turn around, it worked" rose says.

Lou turns and is suddenly flushed against Matty's chest, she stumbles but his hand quickly finds her waist, holding her against him.

"Hi" she smiles.

"Hi" he smiles back, looking down at her. His eyes flick to the bar where he sees the guy he was all but ready to pounce on if he made a single move. Lou turns her head to see who he's looking at and she smiles upon turnjng around to face him again.

Her hands rest against his shoulders as a slow beat plays, she steps towards him so they're closer.

"You don't have to worry about him" she whispers into his ear. His hands grip her hips as she begins to move against him.

"Hmm why's that?" He mumbles into her ear, lips finding their way to her neck.

"Think you already know Matty" she says, pulling back to look at him. Her eyes plead with him, begging him to just kiss her already.

"Because you're mine yeah?" He shouts smiling down at her. She simply nods and his eyes leave her for a second, flicking to someone behind her again.

"Sorry mate" he speaks to whoever is behind her, probably the guy from a minute ago, but Lou's eyes are training on the curly man holding her "she's my missus" the words leave his mouth before he even processes them.

She hears a grumble behind her and then Matty's eyes are on hers again.

"Your missus huh? Like the sound of that" she pulls his mouth to hers then, lips pressing against one another with fervour. Him using that word so casually awakens something in her (and seemingly him too).

He tries to speak through their kiss, eventually having to break away.

"Be my girlfriend? Like proper girlfriend" he asks, it was not the way he had intended on asking her but he was desperate now, not wanting to go another minute without asking her.

"Wanted to ask you in a better setting than this love but-" her lips are on his again, shutting him up. She goes to say yes but suddenly a lanky man is pulling the pair into a tight hug.

"Fucking love you guys" George says, making the two of them laugh loudly.

"How much have you had to drink?" She laughs and he smears a kiss to her cheek before doing the same to Matty.

"Question is... Why haven't you?" His words make no sense but they allow him to pull them back to the booth and allow him to make the whole group (save for Matty) do a few shots. Lou doesn't drink as much as the rest of the group, wanting to support Matty but also wanting to remember the night, for it was already an amazing one.

As the night progresses, Ross and Mia are dancing together, her hands flat against his chest as their bodies moved against one another.

Matty and Lou were flush against the wall in the corner of the room, hiding from everyone else, needing some time to be alone.

"You never answered my question" he says as his head tucks into her neck, lips pressing against the skin.

"Kind of got interrupted" she sighs, hands threading through the curls at the nape of his neck.

"Yeah George keeps fucking doing that tonight" He pulls back to look at her and she smiles.

"Yes I'll be your girlfriend" she says and he mirrors her, wide smiles adorning both of their faces.

"Yeah? Don't care that I asked you in the middle of some sweaty club" he asks and she shakes her head.

"No, because it's you. I'd of said yes no matter what Matty" and the confession has him blushing deeply, pulling her into him to place a loving kiss to her mouth.

"Didn't get to finish what you were saying to me earlier either... Some best friend g is" Matty says, needing to hear what she wanted to say.

"Yeah... Was going to say how good you looked" she says, smoothing her hands down his white Tshirt, fingertips pulling the shirt that rests either side of his frame, until their mouths meet again.

They break away a few moments later and his eyes wander to the centre of the dancefloor where Ross and Mia can be seen.

"Told George to keep her away from that man, she'll break his heart" Lou groans eyes finding where Matty was looking and he laughs at her words.

"You know I know about that night right" Matty says as his eyes snap back to hers, looking down at her as she frowns up at him, not knowing what she was talking about.

"What happened between you and Ross" Matty says, a smirk resting against his lips as Lou's mouth falls open.

"What- how?" She asks, mouth agape, lost for words.

"He's my best friend love, told me as soon as he knew I had feelings for you" he says, thumb drifting along her cheek.

"And? What do you think about it?" She asks, searching his face for any signs of him being annoyed at her.

"Well that depends..." He asks, a darkness to his words, lips pressing against hers, confusing her.

"Depends on what?" She murmurs against his mouth, pulling at his shirt, needing him closer to her.

"What was it like?" He asks, pressing his mouth to hers the moment he finished talking.

"Want the truth?" She asks and he nods against her mouth as his tongue finds hers. She allows them to fight for a moment until she lets his push harshly against hers, making her core flutter and letting him lead the kiss.

She pulls away from him for a second, dark eyes finding his and she smirks.

"It was hot... At the time" she says and she smirks down at her.

"Ross said the same thing" he says and Lou's eyebrows raise.

"Yeah?" Mattys hand drifts along her waist, landing against her hip, pulling her flush against him, moving their bodies to the beat of the music. Her arm hooks over his shoulder, clinging onto him as his hips ground down against hers.

He nods down at her and she finds herself confused as to why he's smirking still.

"If he told you that... Why are you smirking?" She asks, moaning into his mouth as his lips press against hers again.

"Because... It was a childhood makeout, doesn't mean anything... Fizzled out anyway" Matty says, repeating what Ross had explained to him. His lips find her neck again and she sighs.

"Hmm.. what if I said otherwise?" She says, purely teasing him. His head snaps away from her neck, finding her eyes, seriousness now covering his features.

"That's just mean love" he says, and she smirks up at him now, he doesn't find it funny and she's quick to drop the act. Softly playing with his hair as anger clouds his eyes.

"Baby I'm joking" she says, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, drifting them down to his neck and up to the shell of his ear.

"Doesn't mean anything... You're the one I want. My boyfriend" her last words are what gets him to snap back to how he was moments prior. It's what makes him press his mouth back to hers and grind his hips down to hers.

"Say it again" he murmurs into her mouth.

"My boyfriend"

"Fuck" his tongue roughly presses against hers and her hold on him tightens as pleasure increases throughout her body as she feels his hardened length pressing against her core.

"Want to get out of here?" He asks as he pulls away from her. She's quickly nodding up at him making him smirk.

"Good. Can't wait to get you out of this fucking skirt" he says, hand running along the hem of it, caressing her thigh. They quickly weave themselves out of the club, leaving their friends, leaving Lou's sister who is likely still with Ross.

----------------------------------------------------------

Their naked bodies are sprawled out on the bed of their hotel room, Matty is lying on his front as Lou is at his side. Her fingers drift along the expanse of his back, the muscles contracting under her touch before she presses light kisses to the skin.

"We have a break in two days" he says, his voice quiet, looking over his shoulder to find his girlfriend, who's arms were resting against his back.

"Want to spend it with you" Matty says, turning onto his back, she allows him and then lies back down onto his stomach now.

"Id like that" she smiles, pressing a kiss against his stomach.

"Think we should go away for a bit... Just us" he says and she nods again.

"Need to go home too though, need to see my family... And G's" she says and Matty nods.

"My mum's been wanting to see you again. Hasnt seen you since we were kids" he says. A man of many confessions tonight it seems

"Id love that. She always loved me" she says and Matty nods.

"Yeah I know... Used to give me so much shit for treating you the way I did. Said I was a cruel boy" he admits, his words holding a certain sadness to them.

"It's okay, made up for it now" she says and she smiles slightly.

"I'm so sorry"

"Baby no. You don't have to apologise anymore. I forgive you" she says, lips pressing softly against his stomach again, moving upwards until pressing against his lips.

"I know... Just needed to say it" he says and she nods.

"Can't believe you're my girlfriend" he says, hands moving her hair from her face, wanting to truly see her.

"You know... I never really said sorry for how I was to you" she admits and he looks down at her.

"You weren't nearly as bad as me love"

"That's not the point though... I'm sorry Matty, truly I am. Things were so different back then, it's kind of crazy" she says and he nods.

"Why did you hate me?" He asks, looking down at her, she didn't mind being asked it, they hadn't actually spoken about it yet.

"Suppose at first I hated you because you hated me... I tried to get you to like me... But after a while I gave in... Hated you because despite everything the guys said about you, about you being this lovely guy who would do anything for his mates... You weren't that person with me and I desperately wanted you to be... So I hated you because you didn't allow me to have you that way" she admits, something she had never admitted aloud before.

"I never knew that" he says, frowning at her. She knows he's about to apologise again so she presses her mouth to his.

"I often saw the way you were with them, when you thought I wasn't looking and I felt jealous... You told me the guys got to have me in a way you didn't and it was the same for me" she says.

"God we really made a mess of things didn't we?" He says, chuckling at the whole messy situation. She smiles at him and nods.

"Think we've made up for it now don't you think?" She asks and he nods, kissing her sweetly.

"My girlfriend"

"Your girlfriend" she smiles.

"Think I'm ready to make it obvious were dating" he says and she nods.

"That sounds like a wonderful idea" she says lying down on his chest and listening to his heart beat until she falls asleep.

"I love you" he murmurs although she's asleep on his arms now.

"I've always loved you" he says before he feels himself drifting to sleep too.

Part 9

[griffin-girl-r]

Worried sick

Created: 06.06.2023

Finished: 11.06.2023

Edited: 14.09.2023

Age: 21

Word count: 5,190

Warnings: Stabbing, Blood, Inappropriate/Dirty words

Request: Yes (Tumblr user)

Pairing: BlackHill

Summary: Your mother, Maria, is assigned to coordonate your mission from the base, but she gets distracted while doing so.

—

"Alright, girls." Natasha clapped her hands "Line up. I want to see you both together."

Maria Hill, Natasha's wife, took a step forward, deeply sighing in annoyance at her wife's actions.

Y/N, Natasha and Maria's daughter, also took one step forward with one roll of her eyes and lined up with her Mom just like her Mama instructed.

"You're both looking absolutely stunning." Natasha beamed up with a proud smile

The redheaded woman proceeded to smooth Maria's hair and straighten your suit, wanting both, you and Maria, to look your best.

You have been assigned to an easy solo mission.

Just gather some intel then leave as quickly as you arrived.

Easy, right?!

Or at least is supposed to be easy since, your Mom, Maria, has been the one assigned to coordinate your mission from the operational center, guiding you through your earpiece.

That's why Natasha wanted you and Maria to look your best for this mission.

She wanted to make sure that you and your mom were showing everyone that you deserve their respect only by looking at you both.

"Can we leave now?" You asked bored

"Just let me give you both a quick hug." Natasha smiled, pulling you and Maria into a bone-crushing embrace

Maria looked at you with wide eyes, the look on her face screaming for help but she was only met with an equally scared face that was silently pleading for help as well.

"I'm so proud of you both." Natasha kissed your cheek, then Maria's "I love you so much."

"We love you too, Natty." Maria smiled, patting Natasha's back "But we really have to go or we'll be late."

"Yeah, Mama." You jumped in "Mom's right. We love you but we have to go."

"Okay..." Natasha sighed with a nod "Just promise me that both of you will be safe."

"We promise." You and Maria reassured in unison

"Maria, take good care of our daughter or I'm going to kill you and you'll be sleeping on the couch for the rest of your life." Natasha playfully threatened with a hint of seriousness in her voice that told Maria her wife wasn't just playing around

"Yes, Ma'am!" Maria gulped

"Good girl." Natasha winked with a smirk at Maria before turning her full attention to you "Be careful out there, sweetheart." She cupped your face "I'm waiting for both of you to come back home safely to me."

You gave Natasha a genuine smile "Not to worry, Mama. I have the Romanoff blood mixed with the Hill blood running through my veins. I'm an excellent fighter."

"I'm counting on that." Natasha pinched your cheeks, completely ignoring the fact that you were now a fully grown-up adult

"Let's go, kid." Maria pushed you out the door "We have to go."

"Bye, Mama!" You shouted with a wave of your hand

"Bye, baby!" Natasha shouted after you "Bye, Mia!"

—

"Can you see that door at the end of the corridor?" Maria's voice echoed through your comms "That's the room you need to get inside of."

"Copy that, Agent Hill." You responded, taking off running towards the door

"Agent Hill?" You heard a guy's voice chuckle in your comms "Hill, little Romanoff-Hill baby here has a lot of nerve to call you 'Agent Hill'."

"Oh, shut up, asshole." Maria answered the guy "Or you'll be left without a job very soon. I'll make sure of that."

"You know..." The man kept challenging Maria "Why would you do the impossible to have a child with a woman when there are so many amazing men that could give you more pleasure than eye candy Romanoff could ever give."

"Watch your mouth when you talk about my wife, Ward." Maria sounded angry this time

Just as the argument between him and your mother started to heat, you were suddenly surrounded by enemies, that quickly circled you while you were waiting for the files from a computer to download, giving you no way to escape.

"Umm... Mom?" You panicky called out for Maria "Mom, what do I do now?"

"No, you know what, Grant?" Maria shouted, completely ignoring your voice through her comms "Suck it!"

"Yeah?" The same guy, Ward, challenged Maria again "She will never be able to give you the same feeling a man can when she's on top of you."

"Mom!" You shouted again as agents started fighting you from all sides

"Just so you know." Maria mockingly chuckled "I'm the one who's on top of her."

"Bullshit!" Ward shouted "Save it!"

"Mom!" You called out before receiving a punch to your stomach from one enemy

"You really want to know why I got together with Natasha?" Maria deepened her voice, completely oblivious to the fighting sounds that were coming from her comms and your call for her "Because your dad was so fat from all the beer he drank that I couldn't properly fuck him. That's why!"

"Mother!" You let out a high-pitched scream not wanting to witness more of that stupid argument and also because you just got hit on your back "Mom, please!"

"How can you say something like this?" Ward gasped offended "Take it back!"

"I for sure am not." Maria childishly dragged out "And I also bet that your-"

"Ahh...." You screamed, first from pain and secondly, because your ears were hurting from the amount of dirty words you've heard in these past 5 minutes since Maria started arguing with Ward

"Is so tiny..." You heard Maria's voice again after your scream chased down "That I am 100% sure it wouldn't even reach my-"

"Mom!" You cried once again "Help!"

"A lot of us lost respect for Fury when he picked you as his second." Ward stated "I now understand why we used to hate him for that decision so much."

Maria seemed to have one of the most intense arguments of her entire life, being completely focused on it.

You on the other hand were having a tiring fight with your enemies as you were clearly being outnumbered and needed help quickly.

You dodged the punch of one agent but for a split second, your attention was distracted by a loud banging sound, and the same agent whose punch you dodged decided that it was the perfect opportunity to quickly pull his knife out.

"I'll show you why he chose me as his second." Maria shouted, banging her fists on the desk

"Mom!" You screamed terrified as two stronger agents grabbed a hold of you and held you in place

"You're fired, Ward." Maria shouted as she took off her earpiece and stood up

"That's not fair." You could hear Ward's voice coming from the distance

"Mom!" You screamed just as the agent that was holding the knife turned around and swung his knife at you

For you, everything happened in slow motion as the knife's blade penetrated the upper side of your abdomen and the agent twisted his knife inside, causing you even more pain and damage before pulling it out and running away with the rest of the agents.

Feeling like your legs couldn't support your weight anymore, you collapsed to the ground face forward, the world slowly turning darker and darker around you.

—

"And that's what you get for disrespecting my wife." Maria triumphantly announced, sitting back at her desk and putting her earpiece back in her ear "Y/N, baby, what's your status?"

Maria was only greeted with silence and nothing more.

Worry instantly filled her mind and heart.

"Y/N?" Maria asked more loudly this time "Kid, come in! Do you copy? I need a status."

Maria lifted her head and every agent around her could see the motherly fear in her eyes.

The team needed no words to understand that Maria had given them an order with that scared look.

"Connection stable." Said one of the agents "She should be able to hear and answer us without a problem."

"Y/N, sweetheart, say something." Maria desperately pleaded "Tell Mommy what's wrong, baby."

More than half of the agents present around the brunette commander were absolutely shocked. They have never, not once, seen the great commander Maria Hill talk like this.

So softly, so worriedly, so... motherly.

They never believed that Maria, as well as Natasha, had this type of soft side inside them.

Truth be told, they never had it.

But then you were born and every harsh trait any of the two women have had became soft.

They had learned how to be like this because you taught them how to.

"Kid, I need you to give me an update." Maria tried again "Just say something."

When she received no answer once again, Maria started typing on her computer with the speed of light and displayed the map that showed them your current location on the big screen in front of her.

"She isn't moving." One woman pointed out

"My data shows me that she hasn't moved from that spot for the past approximately 10 minutes." A man declared

"I want you to hack any security camera or device that could show us what is happening inside there with my daughter." Maria stood up again "Meanwhile I'm taking the special interventions team and go there after my daughter. It's clear she needs help."

"Yes, Ma'am!" Everyone shouted

—

"I'm sure she's okay, Hill." One agent told Maria as they were getting ready to burst inside the building you were in and kill anything that stopped them from reaching you "You'll see."

"I hope you're right." Maria's voice was steady and her face devoid of all emotions but there was a slight wave in her voice that told the team she was out of her mind from worry "Or else Natasha's going to kill me."

"Sure thing, Agent." One man laughed but was quickly silenced by Maria's death glare "Sorry." He coughed

"Let's move, team!" Maria shouted "We can't afford to lose any more time when my daughter can be in a life-or-death situation. Let us get her out of here."

With just one order, Maria sent all the agents running inside as she closely followed them behind.

Gunshots started to echo throughout the entire building as the commander and her team quickly advanced through the building's floors.

Even though the fight between S.H.I.E.L.D.'s agents and their enemies was as tense and heated as it could be, Maria had only one goal present in her mind and that was finding her daughter.

"Hill, we found her!" One agent shouted

Maria wasted no second in running full speed towards the direction from where the agent's voice was heard.

Once she was close enough, Maria couldn't control the gasp that escaped her lips when she saw the sight she'd been greeted with.

A gasp that turned into a quiet sob.

Right there, on the cold floor of that dirty hallway, was none other than her precious daughter.

Her beloved little girl was surrounded by a pool of blood.

"Y/N!" Maria screamed in a high-pitched voice, sliding on her knees next to your head "Kid, can you hear me? What happened?"

As expected there was no answer from the ghost white girl that Maria took in her arms and lightly started shaking.

"Fuck..." Maria breathed out "Natasha is going to kill me."

"We have to take her back to our med-bay." One man rushed to kneel beside Maria and slid his arms under your back to carefully pick you up "She lost too much blood."

Maria nodded but in her shocked state, there was only one thing she could mumble.

"My wife's going to kill me, my wife's going to kill me, my wife's going to kill me, my wife's going to kill me..." Said the commanded, over and over again

"We're running out of time, Hill." Another man pushed Maria from her behind "Let's go. Now."

Maria tried her best to regain her calm and calculated composure but seeing you in that state, made her unable to recollect herself.

You were badly hurt and it was all because of her.

Because of her stupid argument with Ward.

One moment of distraction can cost her very dearly if something was to happen to you.

And it will all be Maria's fault.

—

"For how long has she been in there?" A boy who looked in his early 20s, one of the new recruits, asked

"One hour, 13 minutes, and 45 seconds." Maria declared from her seat where she was emotionlessly staring at a wall "46 seconds, 47, 48, 49..."

"We get it, Hill." Fury, who was also present in the waiting room, interrupted Maria with a hint of annoyance in his voice "Thank you."

"Natasha's going to kill me." Maria mumbled again at the wall before her eyes went wide and she turned to look at Fury fearfully "Natasha still doesn't know what happened to our daughter. How am I going to tell her?"

"Tell me what?" Natasha's voice boomed inside the room just as the redhead entered the door "Why are you in the med bay, Mia?" She worriedly asked "Where's Y/N?"

"We'll give you a moment, Agent Hill." Fury patted Maria's shoulder, signally to his agents to follow him out before leaning closer to her ear and whispering "Good luck, kid."

Now that Fury and the rest of the agents were out, only Maria and Natasha were left inside the room.

'Come on, Maria.' The commander thought to herself 'You can do it. You can face, Natasha.'

"Babe..." Maria chuckled nervously, standing up from her chair "Why are you here?"

"Cut the crap, Maria." Natasha sternly spoke "I can read you like an open book." She crossed her arms over her chest "I tried to call you but you weren't answering so when I called here they told me you were in the med bay with the rest of the team. Now, what have you done this time? Where is our daughter? I need answers."

Maria considered not answering Natasha's question, but she knew she couldn't avoid Natasha forever.

"I need answers, Christina!" Natasha said more loudly

Uhh...

Middle name.

Yep.

Maria is screwed.

"ImayhaveaccidentallyletourdaughtergetstabbedbecauseIhadastupidargumentwithWard." Maria quickly stuttered, hopping that Natasha understood and she wouldn't have to repeat herself

"Come again." Natasha raised her eyebrow at her wife with a demanding look on her face

Maria had to take a deep breath before slowly repeating her previous sentence "I may have accidentally let our daughter get stabbed because I had a stupid argument with Ward."

"You did what?!" Natasha shouted, her arms falling to her side as her face quickly displayed worry instead of the previous scary look she had "Where is she?"

"Natasha, babe, calm down first." Maria closed the distance between her and Natasha "Okay?"

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down." Natasha pushed Maria away "I asked you where is my daughter?!"

"She's inside the OR." The taller woman explained "Only the best doctors are taking care of her right now, I promise. We have to wait."

"I need to see her." The spy pushed past her wife, starting to speed walk towards the operating room

"Natasha, no!" Maria shouted after her wife, following her, trying to stop her from doing anything reckless "Wait!"

But it was too late.

Natasha had already opened the OR's door.

—

"One, two, three..." Yelled a doctor "Come on!"

Both Natasha and Maria stood still as the scene in front of their eyes unfolded.

There, on the cold table situated in the middle of the room was their little girl, without a pulse as the doctors were trying their best to bring her back.

Without a doubt, this was their biggest nightmare becoming real.

Everything their ears could pick up on was the deafening high-pitched sound of the heart monitor instead of the rhythmic beeping it should have had and their eyes could only focus on the flat line displayed on it.

That specific rhythmic beeping that was meant to put the mothers' minds at ease was doing the exact opposite by its lack.

"Y/N!" Natasha screamed from the top of her lungs with so much power that it would be hard for anyone to match it "My baby!"

"Y/N..." Maria breathed out barely audible "Kid..."

"Someone get them out of here!" The doctor shouted as he kept doing CPR on you

Another two doctors moved from their places and speed walked toward the shocked couple and each tried to push them out the door.

"Ma'am, please." One doctor said to Natasha "Let us do our job."

"We promise she's in good hands." The other doctor told Maria with a nod of his head "Give us some space to work."

"No!" Natasha screamed again "I won't leave my baby."

"Y/N, please!" Maria sobbed out, trying her best to stay strong for you and Natasha "Please, honey. Fight for us."

"Ladies, it's the last time we ask nicely." The first doctor spoke again "We can't save her if you don't let us."

Both Maria and Natasha opened their mouths to protest.

They wanted to tell those doctors a few "nice" things for trying to keep them away from their little girl but instead, the doctors took them by surprise, and, in a blink of an eye, both women have been pushed out the door.

"God damn it!" Natasha cried, punching the door of the surgery room that was now locked "Open this fucking door right now or I'll murder you all."

"Tasha, love..." Maria sniffed, grabbing Natasha's forearms from behind, pulling the ex-assassin away from the door "They are right. We need to let them do their jobs."

Natasha angrily turned around and strongly began to punch Maria in her chest.

She was punching so hard that Maria had to take a few steps backward in an attempt to minimize the damage caused by the punches.

"This is all your fault!" Natasha cried as she kept punching Maria's chest "I hate you! If you would have paid more attention my baby wouldn't have to be inside there right now."

Maria silently accepted all of Natasha's shouts, insults, and punches because she knew that her wife was right.

But she won't lie.

Natasha's words were deeply hurting her.

"I hate you! I hate you!" Natasha kept punching Maria "You're the only one that is responsible for this! My baby is hurt because of you!"

"I'm so sorry." Maria said, her eyes full of tears that are yet to be shed

"It's your fault." Natasha cried as her punches started to chase away

"I know..." Maria sniffed "I'm sorry."

"You'll stay away from my baby!" Natasha shouted but not as loudly as before "You can't be trusted with her!"

"Our baby..." The commander softly corrected the redhead

"My baby!" Natasha shouted angrily "She's only my child!"

"She's my child as well!" Maria shouted as a sudden wave of anger hit her "My kid!"

Natasha was surprised, to say the least.

It wasn't every day that she saw Maria get so angry so quickly and she knows that it was mainly her fault for treating her so harshly.

"Ria, I-" Natasha started

"She's my kiddo!" Maria kept shouting "I know I messed up but she's mine as much as she's yours. I accept my mistake and the consequences of this mistake and I take full responsibility for my foolish actions, but never, under any circumstance, don't try to separate me from her."

Natasha watched as Maria literally made a hole in the nearest wall, punching it with all her might.

This was the first time in all the years since she had known Maria, that she saw her brunette wife breaking down like this.

Maria supported her back on the same wall she just punched mere seconds ago and slid to the floor, her body shaking as tears started streaming down her face.

Natasha wanted to be mad at her wife for not being more careful while doing her job but she couldn't.

The spy's face turned into a big worried frown when she noticed the blood that was slowly but steadily trailing down Maria's hand.

"I'm so sorry." Maria sobbed, covering her face with her hands "I'm so sorry... I feel so guilty."

Natasha softly sighed as she kneeled in front of Maria before gingerly grasping Maria's injured hand in her own.

Maria has always been strong for Natasha, comforting her in times of need.

Maybe now it was Natasha's turn to be strong and comfort Maria in this time of need.

"I'm sorry too." Natasha whispered, tearfully looking at Maria's bloody hand "I'm just worried."

Maria sniffed as she lifted her head to look at her lover.

"I don't hate you." Natasha continued "I'm so sorry for saying something like this. I actually love you more than you could ever know. You have saved my life by showing me that not every person in this world is bad and heartless. You were there for me when I needed it the most. You were the only person who stood by my side through anything and everything and also the only one who was there to pick up the shattered pieces of my heart and glue them back together. In fact..." She gently slid her fingers under Maria's chin and made her wife look directly into her eyes "You've done such a great job at putting them together, that it's very hard to notice that they have ever been broken in the way they were."

"Nat, I'm so sorry." Maria quietly said "I never meant for something like this to happen. I never wanted our baby girl to get hurt because I couldn't focus on my one and only job. The job of taking care of her and protecting her."

"Shh..." Natasha softly shushed Maria "It's okay. She will be okay."

Natasha slowly leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on Maria's lips.

A kiss that Maria eagerly shared back.

This kiss was their own way of forgiving each other.

And just like that, with the kiss of true love, the couple was not only as good as new but they were stronger than before. More united.

"Let's have a look at that hand of yours. Shall we?" Natasha tried to smile for Maria but her heart was still hanging heavy as the uncertainty about her daughter's state was clouding her mind

Maria nodded and stood up on her feet with Natasha's help.

But just as Maria was about to sit back down in a chair, the door of the operation room was swung open, and a doctor, whom they recognized from before, stepped out and looked towards them.

Panic overtook their hearts again as they stumbled on their feet to get closer to the doctor in front of them as quickly as they could.

They were scared to ask about the surgery.

What if the doctor brings bad news with him?

What if the unthinkable happened and their little girl was...?

No.

They can't even bring themself to think about it, let alone voice their biggest fear out loud.

So they waited for the man in the white coat to speak first.

"We managed to bring her back." The doctor gave the worried mothers a reassuring smile "We saved her, the surgery went pretty well and I'm very confident that she will make a full recovery."

"Oh, thank heavens..." Maria breathed out relieved "Thank you so much for saving her, doctor."

"It was my honor." The doctor smiled "She's quite the fierce fighter. Anyone else with a wound like hers would have been dead by the time they reached the medical bay."

"She's our fighter." Natasha proudly smiled

"I'll take you to see her if you want then talk a little about her recovery process and anything you will have to know." The doctor explained "She won't wake up for the next, at least, five to six hours but it might take much more than that. Don't worry. It's only normal after the injury she suffered and also the cardiac arrest she had during surgery. It might even take up to a day for her to open her eyes if her body hasn't yet built up enough energy."

"We understand." Maria nodded "Again, thank you, doctor."

"Follow me." He signaled with his hand for them to follow

—

When they saw you on the hospital bed, neither one of your moms could stop the sob that escaped their lips but the tears that were flowing down their cheeks like a waterfall were happy tears caused by the joy they felt when their ears heard the steady beeping of the machines around you.

"Hi, baby girl." Natasha whispered, walking over to your bed, and kneeling down beside your head "We're here now. You're safe with us."

Your mama moved the hair out of your eyes and gently tucked it behind your ears.

"Mom is here too." The red-headed agent said, turning her head to look at Maria

Maria was completely frozen in place.

Her knees felt weak at that moment.

She knew she had to be strong for both you and Natasha but she couldn't.

She knew it was only her fault that you were lying on that hospital bed right now instead of sitting on the couch back home, cuddled in between your moms, watching movies.

"It's okay." Natasha smiled at Maria "You can come closer."

"I can't." Maria choked back a sob "It's my fault that she's here."

"It's not." Natasha protested "Now come here. She needs both her mama and her mommy by her side. She needs her Mom as well." She insisted "She needs you, Maria."

Maria approached your bed with small, shy steps.

She didn't know what to do.

So she decided to just stare at your peacefully sleeping face.

"She will be okay." Natasha whispered "We all will be okay."

—

Eight hours later, you finally opened your eyes as you filled your mothers' hearts with joy at the simple act of just being awake.

You turned your head to your left and found your mama there with a smile glued to her face.

"How are you feeling sweetheart?" Natasha quietly asked you, stroking your hair

"Everything hurts." You whispered in a groggy voice

"It's going to pass very soon, sweetheart. I promise." Natasha softly smiled "But look who else is here."

Natasha slightly moved aside, allowing you a clear view of Maria who was hiding behind her wife.

You did a quick scan over Maria, seeing her changed in her casual clothes now instead of her tight suit.

And also, there was something off about Maria.

Seeing Maria's hand covered in bandages made you frown as deeply as Natasha had frowned before.

"Mom?" You whispered worried "What happened to your hand?"

Maria was too scared to answer you.

She was also on the edge of bursting into tears, so she decided not to risk it.

"She's okay, my love." Natasha reassured you when she saw that Maria was avoiding the answer "It was just a little tiny accident. A doctor already checked her and in a few days her hand will be as good as new."

"Okay, Mama." You gave Natasha a small nod "Mom, come here."

But Maria didn't comply with your request this time as she kept staring at your face silently.

"Mom?" You slightly lifted your head from the pillow "Mommy, what's wrong?"

This very word was enough to turn Maria into a crying mess in an instant.

She fell to her knees right in that spot where she was standing and covered her face with her hands, unable to bring herself to look at you.

You quickly gave a worried gaze to Natasha who motioned to you to be patient for a few seconds.

"Mia, baby..." Natasha softly called her wife "Look at us, honey. Talk to us."

"I can't." Maria cried, still hiding her face away "This guilt is too much. I'm so sorry, kid. I'm so sorry. It's my fault that you've been stabbed."

"Mom." You sighed "Mom, look at me."

"I'm so sorry." Maria kept crying "I understand if you can't forgive me. I won't forgive myself either and I understand if you don't want to talk to me ever again."

"Mommy, look at me." You sternly told Maria but kept a soft tone of your voice

This seemed to work because Maria lifted her head, sniffed, and looked at you through her blurry vision.

"I am not mad at you." You said "Yes. Maybe that argument with Ward was a bit unnecessary but there wasn't much you could have done either way. Even if you had heard, they still would have had enough time to stab me before the backup team arrived to rescue me. Stop blaming yourself for something that is not your fault."

"I should have protected you better." Maria spoke "I let those people hurt my most precious treasure because I couldn't focus enough on my work. I'm sorry."

"Come here." You opened the arm on your free side and signaled to Maria to come over

Recluntacly, Maria took hesitant steps till she reached your free side.

"I want to hear none of this shit about it being your fault." You grabbed Maria's uninjured hand "I love you, Mommy. You're the best mom in the entire world. You and Mama are the best of the best. Stop doing this to yourself. I forgive you. Now forgive yourself."

Maria nodded, attempting to keep her tears at bay.

"Thank you, kiddo." Your brunette mother kissed your forehead gently "Thank you."

You gave Maria a tired but genuine smile.

"Why don't you go back to sleep and rest, baby girl?" Natasha proposed "We'll be here when you wake up. Besides, you gave us quite a scare today."

"We've been worried sick." Maria added softly

"Yes, Mama." You murmured obediently as your eyes shut closed

"Sweet dreams, baby." Natasha whispered, kissing your cheek

"Sleep tight, kid." Maria followed Natasha's cue and kissed your other cheek

You fell asleep with a smile on your face, not even feeling the pain from the stab as the love Natasha and Maria have for you, fully engulfed you and made sure you felt their love more stronger than pain.

—

Watching over you sleep, knowing that you are going to be okay, the two women couldn't stop thinking about today's events and how they made them feel.

Neither one of them will ever be able to erase that horrible picture of their memory of their little baby laying on that table in the OR, intubated and covered in blood while flatlining.

Sure, you weren't actually a little baby anymore, but for them, you will forever be just that.

That tiny baby they once held in their arms for the first time.

Maria learned her lesson and was determined to be more careful from now on.

But the couple was confident that together, they could overcome anything and this incident will only remain as a bad memory in their minds.

[writer-ann-artist]

The Devil's Ángel

°•~☆~•°

°•~☆~•°

"Are you sure it's a good idea for me to come down?"

"Of course, mi ángel, besides, I haven't seen my niñito yet."

"Ok Hiram, I'll see you soon. Te quiero."

"Te quiero, mi ángel."

Yes, I am in a relationship with Hiram Lodge. Yes, Harmine knows about me, Veronica, too. The family has accepted me as Hiram's girlfriend, but now he has asked me to come live in Riverdale with him.

°•~☆~•°

"Oh mi ángel, I've missed you." Hiram hugs me and kisses my hair line.

"I've missed you too." His eyes rest on the baby carrier.

"Is he awake?"

"Last I checked, no, but you can still see him." Hiram opens the carrier softly and just stares in awe.

"He has your eyes, ángel." I hug his waist, and he hugs me back.

"I was thinking he looked alot like you."

"What did you decide his name would be?"

"Ronnie Hiram Lodge."

"Beautiful."

"Anna, what a surprise. Hiram didn't tell me you were visiting." Hiram moves to hold my hand in his.

"Actually, I had asked Anna to move here." The look he was giving Harmine clearly said it was no debatable.

"Oh well, I'm sure Veronica will be enjoying your company."

"Speaking of, do you mind picking her up after school?"

"I don't want to intrude Hiram."

"Nonsense ángel, besides me and Harmine have a previous engagement."

"Okay Hiram."

°•~☆~•°

I waited outside Veronica's school deciding to surprise her instead. When I see her I wave and she waves back. She walks over with her friends.

"Anna, what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry I didn't call, I wanted to surprise you. I even have a surprise for you."

"Oh, is it expensive?" I laugh and open the rear car door.

"Yes, he is." Veronica gasps and awes.

"You can hold him V." She picks him up and cradles him. I turn to her friends and introduce myself.

"I'm Anna."

"Archie."

"Betty."

"Jughead."

"Pleasure to meet you all. Oh, and this is Ronnie."

"Oh Anna, you shouldn't have." We talk for abit and decide on going to a nice little diner.

"Oh, I love this."

"I knew you would." We sit at a booth with Archie, V, and me on one side. Jughead and Betty were on the other side with Ronnie in Betty's lap.

"He's so gorgeous."

"Thank you, Betty."

"Now, I'm curious. Who's the father?" I hesitate, not knowing what to say. V slaps Archie's arm, and Jughead and Betty pay closer attention to Ronnie.

"You don't have to answer that Anna."

"It's fine, though I'm sure you all know the answer already." I look around and see there faces. They definitely know. Betty speaks first.

"We don't want to come off as judgy, but V loves you so we do to right guys." She looks to the boys and they nod agreeing.

"That's very kind of you, I wouldn't want to ruin your group V."

"Anna you could never." We finish lunch and I take V home.

"I'm sorry again for Archie."

"V it's okay, I get it. The boy is pretty but he's not all there." We laugh as we enter the apartment.

"Miss Lodge, and Miss Heart it's good to see you."

"Andre, good to see you too."

"My girls, and boy." Hiram reaches us kissing V's head and picking up Ronnie.

"Your apartment is right beside ours."

"Oh Hiram, you didn't have to. I could settle for a little home in the suburbs."

"But I want you close to me ángel." I can see this comment makes V uncomfortable.

"Let's go put Ronnie to sleep. I had a great time with you V." I kiss V's cheek as we depart.

°•~☆~•°

In the apartment Hiram is rocking Ronnie to sleep as I prepare for bed.

"Ángel, are you okay?"

"I am, I just. That comment you made downstairs made Veronica uncomfortable. I mean, can you imagine how it feels when your dad is bringing his girlfriend home." He had set Ronnie in his crib and came behind me to hold me.

"It's ok, Mia will understand." I turn in his arms.

"She shouldn't have to Hiram. I'm the girlfriend, I should be the one keeping my distance." Hiram holds my hand in his hands and looks into my eyes.

"I don't want that anymore. I want you in my life, ángel. I want us to be a family."

"You have a family Hiram."

"Who says can't have both?"

"What are you doing to me Hiram?"

"It's alright, now let's get to bed. We know you need the rest."

[asshlyyyy]

Fairytale

Series Warnings: Language, fake relationship, lying, drinking, major depressive disorder, mommy issues. Mentions of occasionally sexula interactions/ wording. Maybe eventual smut. Individual chapter warnings will appear as needed.

Masterlist | Previous Part | Next Part

Chapter 3: And so it Begins

The two of you made your way off of the plane and found a spot to perch up at. You rubbed your face and tore off the bag that rested against your shoulder blade. Austin stood close by your side and watched your every move. You held your phone up and pressed your back against the wall. As you found your sister's contact you pressed the call button. The phone rang and you slide down the wall so that you were sitting down. 

Remember how you said you were going to leave the apartment at three this morning? Well, it wasn't like that didn't happen. You very much did leave on the dot. You just didn't get any sleep. You were running around the apartment filled with nerves. Austin tried to help you the best he could, but there was nothing you could do to stop these anxious-induced emotions. 

You did not like the taste of coffee, not that it even did anything for you, so you opted out of it. Next on the list was an energy drink, which you did have. Then again it did nothing for you. For some reason that you could not explain, caffeine brought no extra joint of energy to your system. When you got onto the flight itself you were knocked out. It was a decent length, almost six hours give or take.

 "Y/n! Did you two land?" You heard your sister's voice from the speaker. You smiled softly and let out a breath.

"Yeah, we just walked off the plane." You answered her. You looked up at Austin and saw that he was looking around. It was a small gesture, but you knew he was just making sure no one would come over and potentially harm you.

"Okay great! We will get going then. I'll give you a call when we are almost there. Just text me where you are." Your sister responded.

"Yeah of course. We might grab something to eat, but we'll head there once you're about five minutes out." You replied as you pressed your hand against the side of your face. 

"Sounds like a plan! See you soon, bye!" Mia said excitedly. You could tell she was excited to see you, and you were also. You were just... not in the mood currently. You couldn't use that fake boyfriend excuse though because... well... he was here doing the whole thing with you.

"Bye, Mia." You pulled the phone away and hung up. Austin turned and looked back over at your hunched-over frame. With everything you were suffering from, traveling was always one that made everything crawl out. Hence why you stayed up all night.

"You okay?" He asked concerned. A past friend could always see when your emotions were down. You wouldn't let him know that though. He didn't know half of it. You looked at him and sent him a kind smile. 

"Hmm? Yeah... just hungry and tired. I don't even want to deal with the reunion. The ecstatic, oh my gosh! I haven't seen you in forever. Great, glad, I just want sleep." You chuckled lightly and pushed yourself up onto your feet.

"I told you to get some sleep last night. At least you caught some zzz's on the flight." Austin pointed out to you. Ah yes, he did indeed tell you to get some sleep last night. He even threatened that he would stay up with you as well. Which you argued with because someone had to be awake in the morning.

So, when you went to your bedroom and got in bed... you ended up laying awake staring up at the ceiling. It wasn't new territory, you have done it plenty of times before. Which was the primary reason for painting your ceiling. It gave you something to look at instead of a blank white ceiling. 

"Mhm, but right now... I want some chipotle or something." You responded. Austin smiled in response and shook his head a tiny bit.

"Let's go get some then," Austin said and grabbed your bag. You smiled at him and nodded a silent thank you. Grabbing the handle of your suitcase, the two of you were off to find a chipotle. Not taking turns going to the bathroom. 

it didn't take long until you two found the food court, and thankfully chipotle. Some airports didn't have certain fast food chains, so you were thankful that this one in particular did. You should have known that by now from the countless amounts of time you've been here. Let's be honest though, usually, you settle for Mcdonald's because it's always open. Sure its always a long wait, but greasy food in the morning... it just hits differently. 

This was really happening, and there was nothing you could do to change it. Austin was here to be your fake boyfriend. You two have thought about every possible question and answer. Yet, you were worried that they would somehow catch onto your lie. You were mostly afraid that you would mess it up. Austin was an actor, he was used to this. You were far from it.

So, as you sat there eating your burrito bowl, you thought about if you were making the right decision. You could’ve easily told your sister that you and your fake boyfriend broke up, but no… you were too afraid to admit it. Too ashamed that you went into a lock of depression. Too ashamed to let your sister know what was going on. 

You felt the skin on your hand being touched, and looked down at it as Austin’s hand connected with yours. He intertwined your fingers and looked at you. He gave you this smile that told you not to worry. Hell, that was all you were going and all you could think about. Your heart was racing an unbelievable amount and you bet if you checked your watch it would yell at you.

“I’m going to be right by your side. Everything will work, I promise you.” He whispered softly. You nodded taking in his words. You believed him, well… you had to believe him. If you didn’t you would let it eat you out until you were nothing left.

“I’m just so worried that they are going to find out.”

“They won’t find out. If there is anything you can’t answer or comment about, I will answer. I got this, I promise you.” You nodded once again and rested your head against his shoulder. You closed your eyes and enjoyed his warmth. It brought your comfort, and it eased down your nerves.

Before you knew it you were receiving a text from your sister saying that they were almost there. Austin and yourself got up and threw away your trash. You didn’t bother wasting the drinks and kept them with you. The two of you decided to share a drink knowing well that neither one of your would finish a large drink by yourselves. 

As you head down to baggage claim, the two of you made your way outside for pick up. You looked for the least crowded area and made your way there. You pulled out your phone and sent a message to your sister saying where you were. 

You reached for your beg that Austin was holding and dug out your coat. It may have been spring, but it wasn’t too too warm just yet. You pulled your arms through the sleeves and brought the hood over your head. Austin chuckled lightly and wrapped his arm around you. 

“When was the last time since you came home?” Austin asked.

“Mmm, couple of years ago. Used to the California weather.” You responded and looked up at him. He hummed and nodded as he kept a close eye on the luggage that was around you too. It was like at Amy minute that someone will come and steal your bags of luggage from the two of you.

You closed your eyes gently and rested your face against his chest. You felt his hand rub the side of your body and your hummed in response. Throughout your mind you were thankful that it was Austin and not just some random guy. A random guy wouldn't have known you like Austin does. 

“Think your sister is here,” Austin said gently and kissed the top of your head. You opened your eyes gently and looked towards the road were you spotted your sisters silver car. You pulled away from Austin and smiled as the car came to a stop.

Mia opened the door with a quick swing and made her way over to you. “Hey princess,” you said with a smile.

“Oh stop, please, it’s queen.” She responded back. You let out a laugh and pulled her into a hug. 

“I apologize my majesty,” Mia let out a light chuckle and pulled away. She looked behind you and you knew her eyes were on Austin.

“So, who is this handsome fella standing behind you?” She questioned as Nick came out of the car. You sent him a smile and looked back at Austin.

“This is Austin, Austin… this Is Mia my sister.” You introduced the two as Nick came over to you. He pulled you into a hug and said a quick hi before he went to put your guy’s luggage into the trunk.

“It’s so great to finally meet you, Austin. I would love to say I’ve heard so much but… I’ve hear nothing.” Your sister joked and pulled Austin into a hug. 

“Well I’ve heard just about everything about you,” Austin smiled and returned her hug. You felt your heart relax at his response. He was truly a profession at this kind of thing. He chose the right field to work in that’s for sure.

“I would hope so,” Mia laughed in response and pulled away. “Nick, come meet your best man!”

Nick closed the trunk and walked over to the three of you. You still found it quite ridiculous that someone would choose their best man off of just a statement. If you didn’t have a boyfriend… well you don’t… but if you couldn’t find someone to be your fake boyfriend then he would’ve been screwed. 

“Great to meet you, man.” Nick held his hand out.

Austin smiled in response nod took his hand. “Same to you. I’m quite honored you would choose a stranger to be your best man.”

“Ahhh, don’t think about it like that. You may be a stranger now, but we have a couple of months to become the bestest of friends. Which I have a feeling that we will be.” Nick said. You shook your head and headed towards the car. You were hoping, no praying, that they had the heat on.

“You choose good,” Amelia said as she followed you, leaving the boys to talk.

“Oh please, I didn’t exactly choose.” You chuckled lightly and looked towards Austin. “Met him when I first moved out there. He lived right across the hall from me.”

“So you fell in love with your neighbor?” Your sister held a raised eyebrow, but her mouth was formed into a smirk. You knew she read a bunch of romance novels and she probably assumed that you two done some naughty things. 

“He was in a relationship when we first met. We were close friends though. When he moved out he and his girlfriend ended up breaking it off. Before you know it he was asking me out.” You shrugged as if it was nothing. It was a simple cover up story, but at least it was half true. 

“And before you know it he’ll be asking you to marry him.” She wiggled her eyebrows. 

“Oh I doubt it,” you shook your head. 

‘You two have been together for what? Three years? Almost four? He is definitely going to ask you to marry him soon.” Oh how wrong your older sister was. Sure in your imaginary world you have been together for years… but in reality it was a week before this trip. 

“If you say so,” you responded and opened up the car door to get in. You knew Austin was a gentleman, and you knew he would argue if you tried getting in the car closest to the road.

Everyone soon found their way into the vehicle, and the car started to move. It wasn’t a long trip to your parents, but long enough where you would fall asleep. You just had to get yourself mentally prepared for your mother. She was something else, and she would want to know every detail having to deal with your ‘relationship’. Maybe if you’re lucky she’ll let you and Austin take a nap..

Mutual Taglist: @darlinboypresley @emmymaehereeeeee @venus-haze @austinstyles

[queenmiarys]

A/N 1: hello everyone I would like to wish all a happy New Year, I hope everyone started off okay.

A/N 2: my and my husband both were under the weather a while, due to our 4 year old

A/N 3 I would like to thank all who read and like this story, been working on a few things and hope to have out soon.

Book:The Royal Romance

Series; ENVY

Title: Brand New Year and New Us

Summary:Liam and Mia spend New Year's Eve and New Year's day in Dubai

Pairing: Liam and Mia

Warning: Lemons

Most characters belong to pixelberry, Mia Ramos belongs to me

Catch up here

Song inspiration

Liam and Mia arrived in Dubai, after dropping off their things, they went on a desert Safari,  they had many activities but for Mia Dune Bashing and 

Sand Boarding was her favorite.

At the end of their Safari they enjoyed BBQ. Up

The activities made them quite tired. Once they got back to the hotel they took a nap, Liam had woken up an hour ahead of Mia, he made a few calls and took a few all their friends had called to check and see how things were going. 

After the call he just sat watching Mia sleeping, after about an hour he noticed her staring to stir. 

Mia's eyes slowly flutter open, it was still day but the black out curtains made the room fairly dark, but she could see Liam seated in the chair across from the bed.

“Babe what are you up to over there?

Liam had reached over and turned on the side lamp at this time

“Just watching the most beautiful woman in the world get her beauty rest.” He winked with a small smile. 

She could see the hunger in his eyes.but Liam grabbed her hand and pulled her up. “I have planed the rest of our evening out, come on let's get ready

After they got ready, they drove to the Aq@uarium and underwater zoo

Liam had rented out the aquarium for just the two of them.They toured the underwater zoo, they then went for dinner at Krasota.

Mia admired the beauty of this restaurant and the show the stuff put on throughout their 8 course meal

Liam watched as Mia interacted with her desert he could see she was truly happy with him and if he was honest he felt for the first time in his life he actually found love and happiness rolled into one

He sat thinking he'd put her through so much in the 7 months they had been dating, now she wanted to go back to the states and he couldn't send her back to the states without trying to make her his forever..

Liam was snapped out of his daze by her voice. “Babe are you alright over there?”

“Of course my love, I was just watching you enjoy yourself, I like seeing you worry free and so carefree.”

“I can say the same about you, I think besides when we first met you are more carefree this trip.”

“I'm always carefree with you.” He winked and smiled.” 

“Hmmm, it's 11pm one hour before the countdown.” 

“Yes, did you enjoy your last day of 2023? 

“Oh very much so, you have given me an experience I'll never forget, thank you so much for bringing me. It's so beautiful here.” 

He kissed her then they went to the spot where they were to watch the fireworks. The day was much hotter than the night. It was a good thing Mia brought a lite jacket along, they had a glass of champagne close to midnight. As they counted down Liam grabbed Mia's hand and asked her what type of life she wished for in 2024

“To keep being happy and loved, and my business to grow and prosper, and my family and friends old and new all the happiness and prosperity, I love you Liam and you have changed my entire world and experiences in life. 

At the stroke of Midnight, they kissed and cheered, but for both they were glad it was after Midnight

Again she could see desire in his eyes, but this time Liam could see the same in her eyes. 

He picked her up and rushed to the hotel elevators, once on the elevator they couldn't get enough of each other.

Once they got to the penthouse they were nearly out of all their clothing.

Liam unhooked her bra, once he managed to get it off he throw it across the room, he put her breast in his mouth, and placed a hand between her legs, she was dripping wet for him, he pulled her underwear the side and got down on his knees pulling her down to him on the bed, he licked and sucked her till she came a few times.

After the second time Mia stopped Liam and asked if she could taste him, she ran her tongue along his harden member then put it halfway down her throat, Liam loved but felt if she kept doing it he wouldn't last long

He flipped her over, she looked at him and smiled. “I want to try that thing you asked me about.” She said in a low sexy voice. 

His eye went wide in  realization of what she meant, without saying anything he got up quickly 

Liam went to the bathroom and found the baby oil and sat it on the side table, this was new to both of them. Liam licked her a few times, licking her ass wasn't at all like he thought, he actually  it was enjoyable more than he thought it would be. 

He grabbed the baby oil and entered her slowly. “Are you okay?” He asked.

“Yes I'm fine.” He was gentle and slow it felt good to her, she could remember when she tried with Chad her ex who didn't have a clue how be gentle or have patience, she found out later Chad had a boyfriend who let him do all those rough things that he tried to do to her, but Liam was so different so loving.

When Liam reached around and again and started playing with her clitoris it made her come both anal and vaginal it was an experience she would never forget. 

After they laid tangled in each other 's arms. It was now after 3 am, they both finally drifted off to sleep without even showering. 

Liam was surprised that he woke up at 7am, usually he wakes up 2 hours before but after all he didn't get to sleep till after 3.

It was 5 am in Cordonia he called Maxwell.

“Hey how's everything coming along?”

“It's good and I'm keeping everyone on schedule as usual, we'll be there.

“Good see you all later. 

@kingliam2019 @choicesfanatic86 @choicesficwriterscreations @hanaleeappreciationweek @honey358luv @alj4890 @ao719 @harleybeaumont @tessa-liam @yolandawalker @yaniradolton @katurrade @mom2000aggie @luvquit @lolablackwrites @aussiegurl1234 @alj4890 @queenjilian @queenrileyrose @kingliam-rys @shewillreadyou @dcbbw @bebepac @bertrandbeaumontfan @burnsoslow

“

 . 

[airasora]

One of my birds is dead and it's my fault.

I mixed myself some medication earlier because I had a headache. Then forgot about the glass and fell asleep. Then I woke up to Sweeney, my kakariki, at the bottom of a cage, dead. There was a residue on his beak that was clearly from the medicine mixed in the water.

I got into a cab to go to the hospital, even though I knew it was too late. His eyes were open and lifeless and his legs were already getting stiff. My sweet baby who always delighted everyone around him with his quirky personality and his shotgun expression is now dead because I was careless and left out medicine.

He's being cremated right now and I will get to pick up the tiniest urn for his little body in a couple of weeks. I'll never get to hear his shotgun impression again. I'll never feel him cuddle up to me and him picking at my ear to show affection. I'll never get to see him feed his buddy Wonka who has once again lost his best friend and I can't explain to him why or how sorry I am. And I'll never get to see him stand on one leg like the little captain Morgan he was.

Accidents happen. I know this. But that doesn't change that this could have easily been avoided if I hadn't been so careless.

I'm dealing with a lot of self-loathing right now and probably will for quite a while.

I'm still waiting to wake up from this nightmare. It feels surreal that I was chatting with him just a couple of hours ago and now he's gone. Just like that. Because I fucked up.

Don't tell me I didn't fuck up cause I did. Yes, it was an accident, but it was an accident caused by myself.

I want to sleep and not wake up again for a long time, but I'm also on high alert and watching my other birds and looking for any signs of any of them being remotely unwell.

I might be MIA for a while. I might also come back soon. I have no idea what I'll figure out works best for my grief. I've never grieved before, not like this.

Goodbye little Sweeney. My adorable weirdo. I am so sorry that you don't get to live the rest of your life because of my unforgivable mistake. I wish I could believe in a bird heaven where you're running around happily, stealing food from people while also feeding others. You deserved so much better. But I also know that if you had the capability, you would tell me you forgive me. Cause that's just the way you were.

Sweeney, I have loved you since the day I first laid eyes on you and I will forever regret the years I will never get to spend with you.

[todouswife]

Guardians of Serendipity- pt2

Yasmine shoots up in her bed; she is immediately met with a throbbing headache making her rub her temples and let out a loud groan. She reaches for her phone on her bedside table but is not greeted with it. Confused, she goes for her purse to look for it but still doesn't find it. Maybe I left it in the kitchen when I got back? She thinks to herself not wanting to believe she lost it last night.

"Fuck my head hurts!" she groans as she looks at the bag on her bedside that one of the guys she met last night got her. She reaches for the bag and looks into it; there is water, Ibuprofen, and snacks in it. She gets the Ibuprofen and water out and takes the medicine for her headache. Yasmine grabs a snack cake and gets out of bed and walks to the kitchen. She is met with the smell of breakfast food and the sight of her roommate.

"Good morning sleeping beauty," Jaleah, her roommate, greets her while she groggily makes her way to sit on the island, " I figured you would need some food after last night."

"Thanks, I appreciate it, Lee," she says looking around the kitchen for her phone. while looking she recalled more of last night. she remembers the intro to the guys that saved her life, she remembers the Uber and them giving her her purse.

"It's gotta be here somewhere, " Yasmine mumbles to herself " Hey, Jaleah, can I use ur phone to call mine? I don't know where it is."

"Yeah, of course!" Jaleah says stepping away from the stove. She unlocks her phone and hands it off and goes back to finish cooking. Yasmine dials her number and puts it on speaker to ensure it's ringing. She listens in the kitchen for the sound of her phone buzzing because her ringer wasn't on. She called her phone a couple more times while walking through the house just in case she missed it somewhere, but on the last call, someone answered.

"Hello?" the voice asked. Yasmine's eyes got wide.

" Oh my god! Hello? Who is this and why do you have my phone?" She frantically asks.

"Oh yeah sorry, it's Roman from last night. When we were making sure it was you're uber we forgot to give you your phone back. Do you want to meet somewhere where we can give it back?" Yasmine sighs in relief hearing the vaguely familiar voice.

"Yes that would be great actually, um I'm actually free all day when can you meet up and where?" He silently thinks for a minute.

"Let's meet at the mug at like ten if that's okay," Roman responds. Yasmine looks at the time and sees that she has some time before she has to be there.

"Okay that's fine I will see you then, thank you by the way for everything."

"Oh of course. I will see you soon" he says before hanging up. Yasmine walks back to the kitchen and gives Jaleah her phone back.

"Did you find it?" Jaleah asks fixing their plates of food.

"Oh god, do I have to tell you something!" Yasmine says starting to scarf down her food. "So last night I went out and got wasted at the club. But it was because I found out Mia and my boyfriend had been sleeping with each other for the past two weeks." 

"Oh, my god are you serious!" Jaleah asks. Jaleah was one of her best friends and they shared a similar interest. Jaleah was tall and skinny with a big purple afro. She has light brown skin her mom is Hispanic and her dad is black. She was always lively and supportive.

"Yes! I'll get into that in a minute. But this man tried to kidnap me while I was messed up, right," Yasmine paused and ate more of her food, "So these three guys scared him off and stayed with me till I was okay. one went and got me water snacks and medicine for my hangover. And they got me an Uber off my phone but forgot to give it to me. So now I have to go meet up with them to get my phone back." she finished

Roman walks into the kitchen to start his day off with some breakfast. While cooking he hears a phone in the living room go off. He didn't think much of it thinking one of his brothers left their phones. It takes him a while to realize that it's the phone of the girl they met last night. Once it dawned on him he walked to the living room and contemplated picking it up unsure if it was the girl calling to look for her phone. Eventually, he gives in after the same number calls more. After their conversation, he sighs. 

"I guess we're getting breakfast there." Roman goes up the stairs to wake the twins up to get ready. 

[a-canker-in-a-hedge]

the people (read: like 4 of you) have spoken! musicals only jfj playlist incoming!! brace for impact!!!

curator's notes below the cut, if you're interested in that sort of thing. otherwise, have fun! maybe i'll drop the frmc one next!

Into the Fire, The Scarlet Pimpernel

I think we as a society are sleeping on The Scarlet Pimpernel the musical, it's bonkers. This one's from act 1, where the titular Scarlet Pimpernel (arguably the first masked vigilante in English literature) and his buddies take off to rescue poor trapped aristocrats from the French Revolution. In a lot of ways, it's best read in conversation with Les Mis (the original novel was written by a baroness, it's reactionary as shit), but here I think it expresses an enthusiastic (and to be clear, Bad) English nationalism that speaks to a young JFJ and precisely what he thinks he's getting out of joining the navy. He is Not Correct, as we shall see.

2. Glory, Pippin

I think this one speaks for itself. Patina Miller as Pippin's Leading Player brings a terrifying, seductive irony and contrast to this number, contrasting the horror of war with the rhetoric that convinces people to go die in the name of the king. The narrative here is I think pretty clear; this is what it's actually like to nearly die in battle. It's bizarre and dizzying and confusing and kind of silly, and you'll only make sense of it later when you can build a performance out of the experience.

3. The I Love You Song, The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee

Oh James. If only mommy and daddy loved you. This one breaks my heart. Neglected children will do a lot to fill that void. This song provides context to the previous two. He wants to be loved, and he confuses love with attention and praise and power. And it will eventually kill him. Again too we see the theming of fantasy as a narrative device. James makes up stories about himself, for himself, contextualizing and recontextualizing James Fitzjames to suit his needs, whatever they may be.

4. The Last One You'd Expect, A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder

Men Will Tell Such Lies About Themselves. Gentlemen's Guide is so funny, everyone should go give the whole album a listen. I like the conclusion of this one as the high point of JFJ's pre-Terror success. Specifically, I like the struggle to stay ahead of the tidal wave he's built himself that's rolling up on his heels. It can't possibly catch up with you if you keep moving, right?

5. Where I Want to Be, Chess

CHESS THE MUSICAL BABEYYYY I AM NOTHING IF NOT ON BRAND. This is a pair with the previous song, an internal monologue as opposed to the external perception of success we've seen previously. The emptiness, the sense of loss of self, the fear and paranoia of living with one's lies, sacrifices, and the harm one's own ambition has caused those around you. It's also got those big stupid melodramatic violins. Fun Fact! The score for Chess was written by Benny and Bjorn from ABBA! I also think JFJ would have really enjoyed Mamma Mia. This is also the Josh Groban concert version, partially bc if I had to pick someone to be jfj's singing voice in the disney animated Terror, it would be him.

6. 30/90, tick, tick...BOOM!

Oh shit death is coming for you king, You Are Running Out Of Time. I feel like this one speaks for itself, if instead of grey hairs you could see the blood at your hairline. Well, not yet. But soon.

7. Is This What You Call Love?, Passion

Speaking of getting slept on, Passion my beloved. This is the most underrated Sondheim musical imo, and is one of the few songs on this playlist where I had a specific scene in mind when I added it. Yes it is that one. Songs to get punched in the face by your captain to.

8. Totally Fucked, Spring Awakening

Do I even need to say? You get it. We understand each other. Yes. This was the toughest one to fit in aesthetically with the soundscape of this playlist, but I think it works where it is.

9. You Gotta Die Sometime, Falsettos

Oh Shit Death Is Coming For You King. You Are Running Out Of Time. This is the 2nd song from a William Flynn show on this bad boy, which feels appropriate to me, somehow. I can't explain it, it's vibes. I think this song really gives JFJ a beat to breathe, to sit in the inevitability of his fate, and a bitter kind of acceptance. It works for me.

10. Any Kind of Dead Person, Ghost Quartet

And now we're having fun with it! This is the only Dave Malloy tune on here, and it's also one of the most lighthearted. As has happened several times before, this song is in direct conversation with its predecessor. You need to keep going somehow, even if you're only walking to the end. Very Samuel Beckett-core, now that I think about it.

11. I Don't Know How To Love Him, Jesus Christ Superstar

We understand each other. You understand why I have done this. I picked the movie version because I like the orchestration better. I have no other notes.

12. Come to My Garden/Lift Me Up, The Secret Garden

This is the most distant parallel line in this whole playlist, but this one is in conversation with The I Love You Song. Reconciliation with an absent parent, with the wounds of the child. They are calling you on. Make peace with yourself. We are almost there.

13. Love To Me, The Light in the Piazza

Please excuse Matthew Morrison's bad Italian accent. I love this song so much. There's a note in Sondheim's collected lyrics about simplicity, and I think this song embodies it. This song is so much about seeing someone for who they are, and it shows in the lyrics, in the lack of both musical ornamentation and complex text, even in the delivery. If I may have one more direct parallel, this song is speaking to 'more than god loves them.'

14. Finale: Make Our Garden Grow, Candide

Let me preface this by saying that this is not a fix-it ending. James does not live at this time. With that being said, I picked this one for two reasons. One, the resonance sonically and lyrically with the previous two songs, and two, the theme of letting go of ambition/expectation/demand. The acceptance of imperfection. The resolution into the simplicity of the body/existence/the reality of one materiality and mortality. There is no Eden to return to. We have only each other. JFJ has the only peaceful death we see onscreen, and for me, this song resonates with that. The release on that last note. 10/10 thank you Mr. Bernstein. That is all there is no more, thank you for coming to my ted talk. Goodnight <3

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Lenny and Midge, dealing with Lorelai’s broken leg.

"Okay, kid, careful now."

Lorelai wobbles on her crutches, but manages to get into the door of Midge and Lenny's place. "Really, Lenny, I can just stay at the Inn..."

"No way, kid," he tells her. "Mia's out of town, and you need to be looked after. And so does Rory."

"You're back!" Rory squeaks, dashing to the door. "Mom, are you okay Do you need anything? Are you hungry? Are you thirsty? Midge made dinner."

"Sweets, sweets, it's okay," Lorelai assures her daughter. "I'm okay."

The five-year-old watches her mother with large, worried eyes, biting her lip, and Lorelai realizes that Lenny is right. They're going to need help.

"Everybody in one piece?" Midge asks, walking out from the kitchen.

"As it were," Lenny responds. "It's broken, so she'll be in a cast for a while."

"Poor thing, let's get you sitting," Midge says, helping Lorelai into the living room. "You can hang out in here, and then sleep in my office on the pullout sofa."

Soon, Lorelai is settled on the couch, and Midge has put a movie on, and Rory is curled in next to her.

"No more yoga," the little girl orders.

"You got it," Lorelai promises. "No more yoga."

*****

Lorelai finds Lenny in the kitchen late that night, munching on a piece of babka, and sipping some coffee.

"Oh, me please, yes please."

He chuckles and pours her a cup as she settles into a chair at the kitchen table. "How ya feelin?"

She shrugs. "I'm okay. It sucks. It hurts. It'll heel."

"The confidence of the young," Lenny chuckles.

Lorelai takes a deep breath and blows it out slowly before looking at Lenny. "So."

He lifts an eyebrow. "So?"

"So...the house across the street is for sale."

Lenny nods slowly, sitting back. "Yes, I did notice that."

"And I...have been saving," she goes on. "Saving a lot. A whole lot. So much."

"That's good."

"But I uh...I'm twenty-three," she says sheepishly. "And I haven't built up enough credit to convince the banks to sell it to me. Even with a hefty down payment."

"Yes, there are some downsides to youth," Lenny admits, looking sympathetic. "You asking me for my help?"

Lorelai nods. "Yeah. I hate it. I don't like asking for help. I've been so good at making all of this work, but I just - this is a hurdle I can't clear on my own."

He grins at her, reaching out and patting her hand gently. "You've got my cosign. Just tell me where and when, and I'll be there, pen in hand."

She huffs out a relieved breath. "Thank you. Seriously, Lenny. This is - it's big. It's buying a house. It's-"

"It's big," he agrees with a smile. "And Midge and I are both very proud of you. You've come a long way. Yoga idiocy aside."

Lorelai laughs. "I took the other girl down with me."

"Of course you did," he chuckles. "You want some babka?"

"Does Midge have an entire closet dedicated to shoes?" asks back with a smirk.

He lets out a short laugh and gets up to get her some. "You're going to have to beat Midge back with a spoon to keep her from decorating your new house."

"I will buy some new spoons."

"Well, you'll need them. You're gonna have a house."

Lorelai beams as she takes the babka. "I'm gonna have a house."

[scribhneoirtuirseach]

I'll Let the Seasons Change My Mind (3/10)

also on AO3

featuring: Mario, Luigi, Bowser, Kamek & Koopas

wordcount: 1125

"Lu! Mail for you down here!"

Stretching out nice and big, Luigi releases a content sigh as he stirs from his sleep. The sun is out but not too bright, providing a nice warmth to the spot he'd been previously curled up in. Perfect, really, for him to just curl back up and sleep again…

"Luigi Mario, don't make me come up there!" Mario calls up again in Italian this time— Must be grumpy from the late night out, Luigi can't say that he blames him all that much. The Toadstools really know how to party!

Soon changing into fresh clothes and making his way downstairs, Luigi runs a hand through his hair as he retrieves the envelope from the table. Not a bill, he notes groggily.

He takes a seat, thumb sliding under the fold to carefully pry it open before taking out the letter within.

"Mr. Luigi Mario is hereby invited to Bowser Castle, which should currently be floating some distance above Mushroom Kingdom, accessible by pipe for ease of travel.

P.S., No need to be anxious: You're the only guest."

"No time…" Luigi mutters softly to himself, brows knit together as he turns over the sheet.

Mario lets out an inquisitive him, setting Luigi's breakfast in front of him. "For what?"

"I'm invited to Bowser's— It doesn't say when to go." He informs, handing the letter over to free up his hands and begin eating.

"Just go when you're done breakfast, eh?"

"I might seem too eager."

"Are you eager?"

Pausing, Luigi squints and playfully jabs his fork in his brother's direction. "Not-a the point."

Hands raising in defence, Mario chuckles as he leans back against the counter. "I think you should go soon as you can, spend the day with him… We don't have anything happening, anyway. Perfect timing!"

Humming, Luigi vaguely wonders whether Mario has any involvement in… whatever this is about, but ultimately decides to shrug it off and focus on eating.

Barely half an hour passes before he leaves home and finds the correct pipe, eyes widening in curiosity at the site of the castle he plops in front of, much different to the last time he'd… 'visited'. The stone exterior is lighter now, must have been cleaned, and the facade of Bowser's face is— inexplicably less intimidating. Though, that might just be his own changed perception of things. 

The land around is no longer completely barren; Still dark, yes, but the grass is beginning to grow and leaves are starting to sprout on the trees. Could do with some flowers…

Flapping his hands for a moment to let go of his anxious energy, Luigi blows out a breath before walking to the gigantic front doors and reaching up in an attempt to tug on the knocker— Not a hope in hell, unfortunately, due to his height.

Luckily, there are Koopas inside who somehow know he's there and work to open the doors from the inside. Unluckily, Luigi loses his balance in his attempt to reach and falls forward into the castle after failing to fix his footing. Lucky a second time, Kamek's magic prevents him from going face first into the floor.

"Mamma mia!" The plumber chuckles nervously as he's set right again, cheeks glowing an embarrassed red by the time his feet touch the ground again. Trust him to mess up just entering a place!

Familiar thundering footsteps are heard approaching the entrance hall, and Luigi watches curiously as the Koopas quickly bow their heads when Bowser comes into their vision.

"Luigi! You're just in time, come along!" He seems thrilled, if not a little nervous, and Luigi can't help a smile, waiting a moment for Kamek to finish dusting him off before jogging to join the King's side.

"What is happening, did you need me for something?" He questions, curious.

"Oh, no, no," A large clawed hand comes up to brush Bowser's fur back as he begins to lead their way through the halls— It looks soft, the way it bounces slightly with each step. Luigi wonders in the back of his mind if it'd be considered offensive to pet it… Hell, if their strange considering-things situation it offensive. Are interspecies relationships accepted and common here? "I wanted to show you something." Thank goodness he can still hear when his mind insists on wandering.

Even so, it's better to will himself to focus than hope he catches context. Whatever this is, it's clearly important to Bowser… He finds himself not wanting to miss out. "Oh ye?"

Nodding, the King stops their tracks in front of another set of doors, hands reaching towards Luigi. When he doesn't move away or show any sign of discomfort, Bowser uses them to carefully cover his eyes for whatever surprise is ahead— By the sound of things, he's using his tail to push the door open as he continues to guide the human ahead. Endearing, the plumber feels.

"Okay, keep your eyes closed…"

Luigi does as he's told, doing his best not to pay mind to how cold his face suddenly feels when Bowser's hands leave it.

"Aaand… open!"

Ever obedient to the wishes of others, he opens his eyes, and they immediately widen with amazement at the room he finds himself in. No overwhelming overhead sources of light, no colours too intense, comfortable furniture, books a-plenty, and… a bouquet of peonies in Bowser's grasp.

After so long living in his brother's shadow, Luigi has been seen. "How…?"

"I had Kamek do some research— And some magic…" The King admits sheepishly as he steps closer, tail swaying proud behind him while he looks over his fine work. "Do you like it? I thought you might prefer spending time somewhere tailored for you, rather than those big, loud parties."

Glancing over to Luigi, his eyes widen to find those beautiful blues beginning to tear up. "And, and it's alright if you don't like it, I can change it! Anything you want—" He's cut off by the plumber jumping up and clinging onto him in his best attempt at a hug considering their size difference.

"It is perfect, Bowser," Luigi manages to whisper, relaxing at the feeling of large arms coming around him to support him. "A perfect space to share with you."

Steadying his own breathing as to not start crying himself, Bowser lets out a relieved huff through his snout as he closes his own eyes. He had been prepared for Luigi to outright refuse, or accept on the condition of being alone… But he wants Bowser's company, if their last few anything interactions are anything to go by— Something that will take time to truly believe, but hearing it truly is enough to melt a previously hardened heart.

[deepwatercomic]

Updates from the Desk of actual Sorrows

first off, I'd like to thank everyone who responded to my polls. It really did help and I did get some great suggestions from other users. It really feels strange to feel like I have to apologize for being MIA on a blog and website I don't think anyone (besides my husband) reads. Honestly life gets in the way sometimes. And we can't all be on the all the time. We're human, we need rest.

My paternal Grandmother died. She was a wonderful, faithful woman who loved her family fiercely and was a faithful Catholic who died peacefully in her sleep on the feast of Mary's Solemnity- which I think she would have found incredibly fitting. It was a long haul with heart failure and just, well, old age. But I will always remember the blue house dresses she wore, the way her massive cross, scapular and medals would click together when I would hug her, the way the Jasmine and lemon trees in her backyard would smell. She would try to tell jokes, but would start giggling before she could even get through the first sentence, and no one could understand what she was trying to say- but her laughter was so infectious that we couldn't help but laugh along. I do hope that with the march of time I don't forget her French-Canadian accent when she would end every phone call or general conversation with "I'll pray for you." And she meant it. I like think Grandma had a direct phone line to the holy trinity, and was frequently discussing matters with Mother Mary. But she did miss my Grandpa very, very, much. And its my sincere hope is that he was there to hold her hand and lead her into the afterlife.

I sincerely want to thank my Aunts, Uncle and cousins for taking such good care of her so she could spend her last days at home with loved ones. You couldn't ask for better or more adoring care.

To make matters more complicated my dear cat, Loki, has a malignant tumor on his face. It was written off as a sinus issue during his yearly wellness exam, and developed into a horrible abscesses (yes multiple) only a few months later. Thanks to a different vet and a lot of pain meds we have a few more weeks with him. He perked right up as soon as we put him on a schedule of gabapentin! Its like having him back to his (mostly) old self for a little while- Its just a matter of when, not if. Which SUCKS, it absolutely fucking SUCKS to have to make the decision of euthanasia. He was supposed to die in his sleep at twenty after gorging himself on all the tuna and goat cheese his tiny heart desired. But, my little trickster familiar will be at home with us when he goes and that is really, the best outcome in a situation like this.

So its right now after major surgery, with family death, pet sickness that I'm still going to school to complete my Bachelors. (I swear, if I don't do things on hard mode- apparently they're just not worth doing AT ALL.) I mean, obviously Deep Water has been pushed to the back burner- and its frankly, this uncomfortable place for it to be (for me at least). Its a story I had hoped would be done about a year ago. I have other projects that I want to move on to. I would just hate to push through it right now and then look back and hate the end result, realize I could do better. Because it is my story, and it is worth telling. This isn't a group project that has deadline or grade. So I'm going to take a few weeks off here, make sure I'm caught up on my school work and try to aim at posting near the end of May.

I hope to see you then. Until then, have a picture of my Familiar happily sleeping while we were watching Golden Girls in better times. And tell a joke that you can't finish because you're laughing to hard in honor of my grandmother.

[nighteyed]

I'm fucking tired.

Did I sleep last night? No.

Do I have a headache rn that feels like my eyeballs are going to pulse out of my skull? Yes.

Do I get to see the love of my life in a few hours? Yes. 🩷

I'll be MIA over the next week. I know I haven't updated on my reread of TWoK, and I will as soon as I make a bit more progress.

I'm currently in the middle of several reads because mood reading seems to be the bane of my existence.

Anyways, this is for those who care. If you don't, that's cool too!

[swanimagines]

shit! i just sent an aski for g13 with either kaz or pin but i meant G3!! oml im so sorry! its G3<3

Echo is talking about this ask, I deleted the wrong one: "as i said, im here to spam<;33

can i pwease have G13 from your affection prompt list with either Pin or Kaz?

like the image their forehead against mine is just-

UGH-

i'll stop weirding you out now😅love you<;3"

FREDDY EVENT, send in requests for any of Freddy Carter's characters!! (Other requests are open too, but they go to my normal to-do list which I'm not able to start doing til March at earliest)

Going with Pin since I'm not comfortable with prompts like this with Kaz because of his haphephobia.

Also for some reason I really like writing stuff where Y/N is supportive of Pin when he rides for Holloway.

G3. Leaning your forehead against theirs

Word count: 520

"Y/N!" Mia's voice echoed through the stables and you flinched at her voice, carefully poking your head out from the tack room. "Are you blind, stupid or lazy?"

"What is it again?" you sighed.

"Firefly's stable doesn't look like it's been even looked over at all, I told you it has to be cleaned by noon and it's already an hour late." she crossed her arms and glared down at you.

You frowned, Mia had told you to clean it by 6pm earlier that morning. "You told me that-"

"No," Mia smirked slightly. "I didn't."

"Why are you always so mean to me?" you asked, feeling tears coming up in your eyes. "You've been ordering me around for days, barely letting me to have a good night's sleep, and I haven't done anything to you to deserve this. I can't take it anymore."

"Yes, you have. You didn't stop your boyfriend when he betrayed our trust and began riding for Holloway," Mia scoffed and rolled her eyes. "So, now you're here and working our loss off."

You took in a deep sigh, turning away and making your way to Jewel's stable.

"What are you doing? You still have work to do," Mia called out to you.

You turned back around, sending her a glare as you unlocked the stable door and soon you were on Jewel's back, riding towards Holloway.

---

Pin spotted you pretty soon after you had entered the gates, walking up to you when you dismounted Jewel. He frowned upon seeing you, you must have looked horrible.

"What happened?" he asked, frowning and putting his hand on your cheek. You leaned against his hand, putting your own hand over it, relishing its warmth. You already felt so much more comforted.

"Mia. She- she said that- we got into a bad fight," you said in a quiet voice. "She blames me for you leaving and makes me work my arse off, I can't take it anymore."

You saw Pin clenching his jaw slightly. "It's fine, I'll be with you tonight," he then said softly. "Just come over to stay here, I'm sure people here at Holloway won't mind if you spend the night here."

You smiled at him, letting him lead you to the stables to give Jewel a place to stay too. The stables at Holloway were big and fancy compared to Bright Fields, you could tell how well they were taking care of their horses. You led Jewel to one of the empty stalls and shut the door after giving her a kiss.

Pin took a hold of your face after you turned around to him, pressing a brief kiss to your lips. When your lips parted, he rested his forehead against yours, his thumb tracing your cheek as another tear slipped out of your eye.

"We'll figure this out. I promise." he muttered and you nodded, letting yourself relax in his arms, your foreheads pressed together as Jewel let out a knowing sigh and you grinned at it, as did Pin too.

You felt so much better, Pin knew how to make it all better.

Pin tags for the Freddy event: @scandalous-chaos @brekkers-desigirl