#you and i 1d….. i did almost cry i’m not gonna lie to you

[livvyofthelake]

the huge thing about something you’ve read getting adapted to a show or movie is that all those songs you used to blorboify in your head while you were on the bus to middle school will eventually be turned into tiktok edits or amvs for those characters. and that’s beautiful. regardless of any other factors at play that’s lovely

[inmyblueparadise]

The 6th member of One Direction

Headcanon: P2 of being the sixth member of 1d (Imagine One Direction x reader)

P1

- Realising MM

- The Best Song Ever music video

- Playing a bodyguard with a mustache, and having to put up with that

- “It itches ! How do guys do it ?” “That why we are men Angel” “Oh please H it would take you 10 years to get a mustache like me !” 

- Crying with laughter when you see Zayn as Veronica, and completely losing it when you see Niall and Louis

- “Oh Gosh ! You look like sex offenders !” “Oi !!” 

- Little dances on stage with Niall

- Hyping Zayn on stage 

- “Give it up for mister Zayn Malik !” 

- Becoming friends with the 5SOS boys  

- And being the victims of the shaving cream fiasco on stage during Teenage Dirtbag

- Forgetting the lyrics of Little Things while sitting next to Louis

- Him not being able to sing next because he is laughing 

- “I’m sorry I can’t remember the lyrics...Louis stop laughing you tw*t!” “ahahah” “We are a mess !”

- Dodging stuff that is thrown on stage, well at least trying

- “Oh Jesus ! Who threw a tampon at me ? It’s expensive love, keep it !” 

- Reading signs in the crowd 

- “Y/N please marry me ?” “Sure where is the ring tho ?”

- And fans screaming at you

- “Y/N sit on my face !” “Hey it’s a family show !” “Or is it H ?”

- Playing Repeat in interviews with the boys 

- “And it was important” “Repeat” “And it was important” “Repeat” “Jesus Y/N !” 

- Them protecting you, but also letting you have fun

- “So Y/N did you sleep with any of the boys yet ?” “what ?” “Well you are a pretty girl, and you are surrounded by beautiful boys all day..” “You do realize that this question is highly disrespectful not only to me, but to those boys because some of them have girlfriends, to our fans who came here to hear us talk about the new album, and to all the women in this industry ? I’m a singer, same as them, I sell millions of records, like them, I win awards, like them, yet you only seem to be interested in my sex life ! But no I am not sleeping with them, And I am leaving.”

- The boys slow clapping you, and following, but not after they gave a piece of their mind to the man

- Starting to feel overwhelmed because of being overworked by Modest

- Fuck Modest!

- Crying on stage while singing Diana 

- And letting the crowd finish 

- And smiling through the tears when they sing very loudly “Baby you’ve be saving mine”

- Feeling betrayed when Zayn tells you that he is planning to leave the band

- Locking yourself in the studio for 2 days after that 

- Writing Infinity because of that. 

- “How many nights have you wished someone would stay ? Lie awake only hopin' they're okay”

- And Where do Broken Hearts Go.

- “oh Angel ! Come here” “It’s gonna be alright”

- But in the end understanding the pressure he is under

- The rest of the tour being very different 

- Having to sing Zayn’s high note in You and I 

- “Jesus my soul almost left my body singing that” 

- His departure bringing you guys even closer 

- Hugging a lot more 

- Being shipped with the boys all the time 

- You all joking about it 

- “Niall ! You are cheating on me with Niall ! Angel you wound me !” “I’m sorry Liam but he is sooo bloooooond” 

- Little dances with Liam during Act My Age 

- Irish Dance with Niall obvs

- Being called girl almighty by the fans - and the boys lovin’ it

- “Make some noise for our Girl Almighty !” “But where is by big balloon then ?” 

- Accessorizes thrown on stage 

- “Liam you make a marvelous banana” “Shut up I look outrageous” “He’s dressed as a banana ! heyyyyyyy”

- Feeling sick on stage 

- And having to sit down and finally leaving the stage early because you couldn't  breath 

- The boys being worried

- You being on vocal rest for three days and having to miss a show

- “As you can see, our lovely Y/N is not here on stage tonight, don’t worry she is not leaving she is just feeling sick and is on vocal rest” “Please make some noise for her this is what makes You Beautiful”

- Tattoos ! 

- Harry insisting on tattooing you 

- “You did not tattoo a smiley face on my big toe Harold !” 

- Playing Tattoo Roulette on the Late Late Show

- You and Harry losing and having to get a tattoo - But being happy because Niall didn’t have to get one

- So much pressure from mAnagMent

- Countless nights talking about life on the tour bus while drinking beer

- “Those are my favorite conversations” “We are just talking out of our asses, especially you Louis” “Oi !”

- Starting to talk about taking a break - and crying about it - but knowing that it’s for the best

- Made in the AM

- “I think we should write a song for the fans” “What are you thinking about ?” “I don’t know, I wanna write them a song so went we are gone they can listen to our voices and sing along”

- The boys surprising you by writing a song for you - the little angel of the group

- Releasing the fifth album

- Giving 150% on the last show of the tour

- Dancing on Act my Age, with your family and friends right in front of you

- Hugs all around

- “Thank you so much ! We’ve been One Direction and we’ll see you soon” yeah that's me clowning

- Not being able to stop crying and softly saying into the microphone as you leave “As one of my best friends said 5 years ago, don’t worry this is not the end of One Direction” 

- Performing History one last time on the X Factor stage 

- Not knowing what to do next, but knowing that you will always have your boys

Like if you want a list for her after the Hiatus

Love x

[carolinaflicker]

still - sam winchester

pairings: sam winchester x reader, sam winchester x eileen leahy

summary: when eileen leahy walks into the winchesters’ lives and steals the younger brother’s heart, how is his girlfriend going to handle this new development?

warnings: angst. like so much angst. swearing, broken hearted reader, mentions of cheating, sam being a dumbass, eileen hate (I’M SORRY)

word count: 1,320

a/n: this is based off of the song still by niall horan!! i haven’t been able to get this concept out of my head. also lmao see if you can count how many 1d mentions i crammed in here

Sam stood still in the middle of his bedroom. The heat of the room seemed to increase with every moment passing by, correlating with the tension rising.

The woman in front of him was silent, yet the tears falling down her cheeks were betraying the secret of her emotions. She seemed to be foraging for words as her eyes stayed focused on the corner of the bedsheet.

“What was it?” Her broken voice filled the room.

Sam cleared his throat, “What was what?”

She paused for a moment. She kept her body still; her left arm remained slung across her body as her right hand held loosely onto her right cheek. Some hair fell from her untidy updo and framed her face as she began speaking.

“Whatever it was that made you choose her. There must’ve been something, right?”

Sam’s eyes flitted immediately to her face, shocked at the insecurity of the usually confident woman in front of him.

“Hey, hey. There was nothing, Y/N. Please believe me. You have to.” He crossed the room quickly and reached down to hold onto her arms, attempting to make her meet his gaze.

“Nothing?” Y/N’s face had filled with anger as she finally brought her focus up to his face, “How could it have been nothing? You chose her.”

“Sweetheart, please listen. Eileen-“

“Don’t say her name.” His once beloved kept her gaze locked onto his as she ripped her arms out of his grasp.

Sam’s expression turned crestfallen as he shifted slightly, “It’s complicated.”

“It’s complicated?” Y/N scoffed in disbelief, evidently irate. “I gave you 5 years of my life and she walked in two months ago. It was clearly an easy decision for you.”

Instead of answering, Sam looked to the floor, dismissing the topic entirely. Y/N noted the classic Winchester tactic.

“I hate seeing us like this. Seeing us broken up.”

Without permission, the flood of tears welled in Y/N’s eyes again as she choked on air, struggling to keep her composure with every fleeting minute. This wasn’t the Sam she had fallen in love with. She realised the man standing in front of her was a stranger.

“You did this to us, Sam. To me.” She could see him receding back into himself, unable to face the truth of his transgressions.

She continued, “Do you know how hard it is to watch it? To watch her wearing your shirts, walking around the bunker like she owns it? To see her sit in your lap as you read in the library? She took everything from me. And you let her.”

The look that Sam directed her way almost sent shockwaves through her body, but it only served as purpose for her anger to rise.

“What? Can’t handle the truth, Sammy? I know you think I have no reason to hate her cause she’s done ‘nothing’ wrong but, fuck, do I wish she were dead.” Y/N knew her words were harsh, however she had no intention of taking them back.

It was Sam’s turn to scoff. His hand reached to the slight scruff growing on his face, rubbing it in exhaustion. His steps fell heavy on the hardwood floor as he turned to take a seat on the end of the bed.

The two remained in uncomfortable silence for what felt like a lifetime. It was a strange feeling for her, to stand in unbreakable tension with the one man she had trusted everything with. She had never failed to speak her mind around him, yet here she stood speechless.

“I’m gonna ask you a question.” The sudden statement gained Sam’s attention, “You’re gonna answer me honestly.”

“Okay.” It was all he could say.

“Did you, um,” Y/N swallowed thickly, “Did you ever see her when we were still together?”

A beat.

“Don’t make me answer that.”

Y/N’s heart fell to the bottom of her stomach. The lunch that Dean had forced her to eat earlier threatened to rise to the top of her throat as she clenched her eyes shut and raised her hand to her mouth, breaking into silent sobs.

He let her cry in front of him as tears of his own spilled down his face, yet his expression remained as stoic as it could. The heaving from her chest grew louder and louder and Sam was sure it could be heard through the whole bunker.

Y/N hiccuped slightly and spoke as coherently as possible through her broken sobs, “You know, you were the first guy I ever met that didn’t turn on the charm for everybody else. I had so much pride knowing that only I got to see that side of you.”

“Things change, the night changes. I guess we lost it.” Sam didn’t even recognise the words coming out of his own mouth. Despite being the truth, he could never have imagined speaking to Y/N this way. He couldn’t seem to stop.

“Lost what, the spark? I’m sorry I didn’t manage to give you the honeymoon phase for half of a decade, Sam.” She rubbed at her stinging eyes.

“I love her.”

“No you don’t.”

He looked at her for the first time in 15 minutes as he gaped like a fish out of water, unable to process what he heard.

“It’s not real. I know your love isn’t real.” She seemed to drain with every sentence she spoke, “Maybe I should go out there and warn her. I’m never gonna be her friend but nobody deserves to be treated like shit by you again.”

“How can you say that? I loved you.” Sam seemed to be at his breaking point; his hair stuck in wild directions from where he had been pulling it in stress, his eyes were bloodshot and wide, and his clothes were a mess.

Y/N had become quiet and she sunk into the desk chair to the right of her old bed. She was whispering now, only releasing crackles of her voice.

“Did you, Sam? You know, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m reckless. I’m not stupid.” She ran both her hands up her cheeks and into her hair, “God, I can’t believe I let you use me for so long.”

“I never meant to hurt you.”

“But you did.” Y/N stood again, not sure of how to conduct any of her movements. She was on edge and uneasy, a stark difference to the comfortability she usually found in Sam.

“I’m standing here with you just trying to be honest. Why can’t you do the same?” She thought he at least owed her that much.

“I am! I don’t love you anymore.” Sam’s voice raised significantly higher as he now towered above her, shaking in exasperation. He noticed that she flinched when his tall frame rose and involuntarily took a large step back.

“I know, I know.” Y/N hugged her own body, exhaling harshly through her mouth, “But... I still love you. So please, just lie to me. Tell me you want me. Say it one more time.”

“I can’t.”

She already knew he couldn’t say it. She already knew that when they left this room, she was going to pack up and leave. It would break her heart, and would definitely break Dean and Cas’ too, but Y/N knew that she couldn’t handle 5 more minutes of Eileen draping herself across her ex-boyfriend.

It was a sad reality; sad that her life had come to this, sad that she had to leave it all behind, and even sadder that Sam wouldn’t miss her at all.

“It’ll be alright.” Sam mumbled.

Y/N’s eyes narrowed at him and she turned her body fully to reach the door handle. She glanced back over her shoulder and took one last look at him. She scanned up and down, remembering the nights she spent tracing every inch of his body, washing away his insecurities.

Looking into his eyes, she took a breath.

“Goodbye, Sam.”

[mashtonasfuck]

I was at work when Ash posted this, and came out of work to see the notif and then proceeded to sit in my car sobbing for 20 minutes. This man, and this band are my lifeline. I’ve never told y’all my story about how I found 5 Seconds of Summer, but now seems like a good time. I’ll put it under the cut so it doesn’t clog up your dash.

I found Luke around the 14th of March 2011. I was 14. He’d posted his cover of ‘Fireflies’ by Ron Pope a few days before, and there was just something about it that I couldn’t get out of my head. At the time I didn’t think much of it (this was pre-youtube account) and I kept checking back every now and then to see if he posted anything else. In April of that same year, Mike and Cal uploaded a video introducing them as a three piece under the name of ‘5 Seconds of Summer’ - they did a few more covers, most of the time with only two of them lmao, and I kept checking back to see what they were posting. Ash joined them in December 2011 and they became a four piece.

When they uploaded the video for ‘Teenage Dirtbag’, I knew that I wanted to keep watching their content as there was just something I still couldn’t shake. The energy with the four of them had shifted somehow from just being the three of them, and it kept me interested.

They toured a lil bit of Aus in 2012, and I spent my days on Youtube watching shitty videos of them playing songs they’d written themselves rather than covers. They then revealed that they were releasing an EP later in the year. They dropped ‘Unplugged’ in June 2012 in Aus and NZ and I remember being super sad that I couldn’t buy it in the UK yet. It was released WW in December 2012, and you bet your ass I bought an iTunes voucher so I could buy it (remember iTunes vouchers?? Those were the days, RIP iTunes). They moved to London at the end of that year. I remember seeing a video someone uploaded of them doing an impromptu session playing in a park in London and being so sad that I wasn’t there to see them. They did some small intimate shows in the UK while they were over here, but I never got to go to any of them.

In early 2013 they started touring with 1D, but again I never got to see them. I LIVED for the shitty videos people were posting on Youtube of their performances, and I was desperate to see this band I’d become so obsessed with following.

On the 24th of February 2014, they uploaded the video for ‘She Looks So Perfect’ on Youtube. It was at this point that my friends at school became aware of them and started following them, despite me telling them for years that this band were awesome (teenagers, am I right?). On the 27th of June 2014, they released ‘5 Seconds Of Summer’ out into the world. I was 17 years old.

At 17, I was struggling with A LOT. My grandad was very ill, my friends turned out to not be my friends, and it’s probably one of the loneliest periods I’ve ever had in my life. I’d experienced what I thought was heartbreak, and their self-titled album was everything I needed at that time in my life. I finally saw them on the 5th of June 2015. I got to spend two hours in a room with my four favourite people in the whole world. I have a video of them playing ‘Everything I Didn’t Say’, and all you can hear is me sobbing in the background lmao.

Walking out of that venue, I knew my life would never be the same.

I was pretty active on social media at this point, as were the boys, and seeing the stupid things they got up to on Keek and Twitter genuinely made my days so much brighter.

As we all know, ‘Sounds Good Feels Good’ was released on the 23rd of October 2015. I was 18, my parents had just split up, my grandad had died and I felt like the whole world was out to get me. I fell into a period of intense depression and did some things I’m not proud of, and I honestly didn’t see a way out. Then SGFG came along. That is the album that quite literally saved my life. Listening to the four people I admired most in the whole world singing lyrics about things I was going through, being the same age as me, was totally overwhelming. I don’t remember my first listen through of that album - what I do remember is the way that it changed my whole world view.

They understood exactly how I felt, down to the last detail. To this day I have to leave Broken Home and Invisible off of playlists because they jolt me back to a time in my life that I don’t ever want to experience again. That whole album was my saving grace for a long time. I’m eternally grateful to them for releasing it when they did, as I’m gonna be straight up and say that I might not have been sat here typing this today.

I went to their show for the SLFL tour on the 8th of April 2016. I spent most of that night crying my eyes out and getting weird looks from the people around me, but I didn’t care. This was my band, and they were playing the songs that literally saved me. The SGFG era was emotionally draining for me for a long time, and it took me a while to be able to listen to most of the album again as it just felt so raw.

When they took time off to rejuvenate themselves before album three, I was worried. For the last 6 years this band had been what kept me waking up each morning. The lack of content was freaking me out and I wasn’t sure how to deal with it. My mental health was on its way down again and I found myself going back to old patterns.

At this point, I’d been in a relationship for almost three years, was engaged, and was living with my then SO. I thought everything was perfect, I had the life that I wanted with a man that I thought I’d be with forever.

In February 2018 they released ‘Want You Back’, and I loved it, but didn’t have the connection with it like I did with SGFG. I missed out on tickets for the 5SOS III Tour (and may have cried about it, but it’s fine), but bought tickets for the Meet You There Tour before they even released the album. This was my band, of course I was going to see them.

When ‘Youngblood’ dropped, I had a day off from work. I set my stereo system up, and lay on my living room floor with the speakers around me in a circle. I wanted to feel the new album, not just listen to it (weird, I know). Want You Back and Youngblood were fine, but then we hit Lie To Me.

‘I know that you don’t, but if I ask you if you love me, won’t you lie, lie, lie, lie, lie to me?’

I genuinely felt all of the breath I had in my lungs, vacate. I’m gonna be straight and say that I hadn’t been happy in my relationship for a while despite what I said above - my partner was emotionally abusive, and the warning signs were clear, I just didn’t want to see them. That one line haunted me every time Luke sang it, but I let it play through and moved through the rest of the album. When it finished, I let it play through again. I let those lyrics flow through me, and by the time it got round to Lie To Me again, I was sobbing. Once again, these boys knew exactly what I needed to hear, at the exact time in my life that I needed to hear it. It took me seeing them again in November of last year to make a change in my life.

If you’ve been around for a little while, you’ll know that I’ve shared my Meet You There Tour story before, but if you haven’t read it, you can find it here. I stood at the back of the O2 Academy in Birmingham, a year ago tomorrow (1st of Nov) and cried. Listening to my boys sing those songs in person absolutely broke me, and made me realise that I wasn’t happy in my relationship. I left that show heartbroken, and overwhelmed, and honestly exhausted, but I drove back home and spent the next two months trying to fix the relationship I was so unhappy in.

I thought I’d made progress, but after Christmas of last year, everything fell back into old patterns and enough was enough. Watching my ex-partner walk out of the front door was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to go through. I’d taken the plunge, but I was broken. I moved back in with my mum in January of this year, which has been incredibly stressful (that’s another story lmao), but the one thing that has kept me going is these four boys.

Ashton is always the one that I feel the most connected with - I don’t know if it’s because he’s the oldest and people usually think I’m a lot older than I am, but his life philosophy and his attitude towards the things which make him a better person, inspire me every day. Whenever I’m having a shitty day, he always seems to put out a Tweet which says exactly what I need to hear. His love for us keeps me going every day, and I strive to be even half the person that he is. He does so much for us, and I thank God every single day he biked halfway across Sydney to attend that first band practice as a four-piece.

Their music makes me feel a lot less lonely, in a world that hasn’t always been the kindest to me. Because of them, I’ve met some of the coolest people on the planet through this godforsaken website, and the existence of these people in my life makes me excited to wake up each day.

This Tweet from Ash tonight reminded me exactly why I stayed with this band way back in 2011. Their passion for their art inspires me every single day and I am constantly in awe of the way they continue to push themselves and their performance.

I am not the same person I was at the start of the year. ‘Youngblood’ has helped me reinvent myself into the person I’ve always wanted to be. I’m so much stronger than I ever thought possible, and I’ve only realised that because of four dorks from Sydney that told me it’s okay to be whoever you want to be.

I will forever be grateful for their music, their passion, and their presence on this Earth. I’ve never stuck with any artist as long as I’ve stuck with this band, and I would not change that for the world.

Thank you 5SOS, for always being there for me, even if no one else was. I love you guys.

[popliar]

Burn the Stage 

That was a really fun screening in Sydney, getting to see it with all the fans. Thank you to all the fans that gave away free stuff! I’m gonna treasure my Koya photo sob.

The movie is super fun, if you love BTS you’ll have a good time. YEONTAN IS A SUPERSTAR OMG. And gimme the orchestral arrangements of Sea and Spring Day right now omg.

Cinematically I don’t think it’s specific or coherent enough to be a great documentary - there’s very little context of who they are and what they’ve done. And there’s some scenes which are very stagey - like way more than the series even - and I’d love even one (1) full song performance? But anyway. It’s mostly new footage. It’s fun rather than essential, the series gives way more narrative development and canon ‘facts’, but if you’re a fan this is bang for your buck.

Spoilery thoughts below the cut:

. . . . . . . . . .

It has a voiceover? From… someone? It’s totally unnecessary. Made all the more jarring by the fact that at one point Yoongi does a brief voiceover too? Yoongi’s one is quite touching. The narrator one not so much.

The bbq and pool scene was, like, straight out of boyband documentaries 101 lol. I think they did something almost exactly the same in the 1D documentary (YES I HAVE SEEN MY FAIR SHARE OF BOYBAND DOCOS). Like, it was very sweet and all, and I CRACKED UP at the shot of Yoongi coolly sipping his wine while the rest leapt into the pool like fools, especially Jin, but it had a slightly forced “we’re playing up for the cameras” sense to it.

That said, that was a relatively brief segment and I think probably filmed quite early on? The rest of the movie is much more naturalistic behind the scenes footage of the tour, like the bulk of the yt series.

And also that scene included Taehyung playing first chopsticks on the piano, and then the wedding march - which then cuts to Jimin and Hobi holding hands and one of them yelling “Groom Seokjin” WHAT. I don’t know. Who is married? They’re all married.

One thing I don’t think they touched on at all in the series was that Namjoon was carrying what looked like quite a bad leg injury through the early stages of the tour, enough that he had to be piggybacked backstage and his leg was splinted. I wonder if it’s related to the injury that kept him off stage towards the end of BST promos? God. I hope it’s not a recurring injury.

Yoongi drinking wine as he composed and getting all red in the face was fucking adorable don’t look at me. Seeing him get very, very nerdy and happy with music equipment purchases was soooooo good.

Seokjin backstage bantering with his physio as they went through stretches was a delight. His flailing with 3d goggles (yes we finally see that scene!) was also just SO JIN as was Namjoon looking vaguely alarmed and staying well out of arms’ length.

We saw multiple scenes of Jin eating in hotel rooms with Jungkook and Jimin, just like they do in their vlives, I AM SO GLAD they have their little gang. In one scene JK says he has an IQ of 128 and Jimin says his is the same - Jin says his is 108 and CRACKS UP, he is wonderful, I love him.

You will be shocked but Hobi is, like, hot. You know how sometimes people are like “yes in person he is very masculine but very pretty, both at the same time!” well yeah those vibes were strong. In the end credits he also is waiting backstage and is like “ow I bumped my head!” and then straight away assumes game face to go on stage and I’m just fascinated by that, how he turns it on and off. Also him being anxious about JK and hovering over a hurt Namjoon was very in my feelings, sob they care for each other so much… And haha teasing Namjoon about how much shopping he’s going to do as tho he’s any better!! Also I love that they played SOOO much of Piece of Peace, it deserves that shine.

They showed a little of Jimin crying again about his performance, poor bb, but also Tae coming to comfort him and take him off camera. They also showed the two of them doing couple dance moves at the end, and falling over each other with laughter, so u know. SOULMATES.

BTS thanking their crew and toasting them was very sweet.

It follows the series timeline, and then extends beyond it to the Fake Love performance at the Billboards, placing their first Billboard win in the middle of the movie. That part is actually shown quite briefly and is followed by quite a long sequence in Sydney, their first stop after winning the first Billboard. NOT TO BE BIASED BC I LIVE IN SYDNEY AND WAS AT THE SHOW but that was legit one of the best sequences in the movie. They’re all so happy and buzzy from winning - “stop saying Billboard!” Jin says backstage, and Yoongi and Namjoon both protest they only said it once, Yoongi saying “I didn’t even say B!” - and then when it’s rehearsal time they each do each other’s solo stages!!!! OMG this part was so good -

-Taehyung does Begin and IS AMAZING, omg the footwork. -Jimin does Reflection -Yoongi does Awake and halfway thru, as he’s up on the pedestal, says “I can’t do this” LOL -Hobi does Stigma and really belts it! -Jungkook does First Love and trips over the staircase lol poor bb!

I don’t think we saw Namjoon or Jin? Correct me if I’m wrong. It all went by so fast lol.

And yeah I’ll never be sick of seeing footage of the Sydney show. They look so happy. I am so glad i was there.

After the world tour, they show a meeting with BTS and Bang PD, where he says it’s “90% certain” they’ll get to go to AMAs and perform. That’s pretty fascinating. He also says he’s worried that they will be miserable if they keep on like this and that they have to find happiness, and they agree. (I think Taehyung was absent from this scene? Not sure why, could be anything I guess.)

The Wings finale in Seoul! Yeontan popping up out of his little carry bag produced the biggest audience UWU everrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I clapped, I won’t lie. And then! Jungkook playing with him! Hobi scolding him for peeing but also cuddling him and doing the Mic Drop “did you see my bag” dance omg it goes on for ages and is ADORABLE and Yeontan looks… so patient…. LOL….

I can’t remember anything else off the top of my head… I know I mentioned some members more than others but it’s only bc I’m writing this quite quickly and don’t recall everything. Feel free to message for more info. I’m sure it will be out in full soon enough tho anyway.

[mingyiu]

guess who went to diamond edge in toronto and had the time of her life

OK GOTTA TYPE THIS UP BEFORE I FORGET EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED

istg everyone I encountered went/is going to more than one north american diamond edge concert and i’m just like :/ /salty

this girl behind me was showing off how she went to the airport (which was a shit show)

the girl in front of me HAD HER CARAT BONG WAY UP AND FILMED ALMOST THE ENTIRE CONCERT LIKE OH MY GOD

i literally had a terrible view of the front+center of the stage and any view of the stage i had was broken up by her ARM AND CARAT BONG

i sat on the far right side so because of this girl in front of me i missed a lot of the stuff that was going on on the left side + the front center of the stage... aka everything

so i focused a lot on whoever was on the far right side at the time

legit i was watching a video back of their adore u performance and i was like “how did i miss that part???” (the second verse where they carry vernon off) and then i saw wonwoo on the far right of the stage and i was like lol oh

if mingyu/wonwoo were within my line of sight i stared at them for sure

wonwoo was to the far right a lot in the beginning so i was straight up just staring at him at the very beginning of the concert

mingyu who

jk i actually saw mingyu first

ok svt irl

i’ll get more about what they look like close up at the end but like from my view of the stage...

imagine svt members on their best day in a pic by your favourite fansite who has THE BEST PHOTO EDITING SKILLS

now multiply that beauty by 10

that’s what they look like from row H

legit like... for the most part they look pretty much the same as they do as we see them through the computer screen

but like way more flawless???

srsly they all look SO GOOD SO DAMN GOOD

but wonwoo

DAAAMN @ WONWOO

i was literally blown away by how amazing he looked

like his features are so sharp

like he didn’t look real

he looked like a porcelain doll

they all did

but moreso wonwoo

i just stared at wonwoo for like the first three songs like shit damn boi

all my dreams came true when i got to see pretty u + beautiful literally my favourite svt songs

minghao spoke in english a lot like i think i’ve heard about that a lot from the other concerts but to see it irl WOW

i’m so happy soonyoung is feeling better

he /OWNED/ the stages

it was his stage seventeen who

lol jk but seriously during his parts he srsly owned it

mingyu is as soft for carats as expected

maybe even more so

i’m trash and just stared at mingyu during every ment

frick he was all heart eyes at carats the entire time

vernon+mingyu slapped jeonghan’s butt at one point

i am alive

ok back to soonyoung owning the stage

performance unit stages??? were the most memorable for me!!!

their dancing is so powerful????????????????

tbh none of the vocal unit songs are really my fave but like quality vocals yasss

their performance of don’t listen in secret was really difficult to see... bc they were mostly sitting down and i’m short + sitting far back i could barely see them

seungkwan was at the center for habit and the annoying girl in front of me was covering him the entire time im so sad

HIP HOP UNIT!!!!!!! 

i like kinda forgot about that one song... that they posted on their soundcloud... wow am i great carat or what i don’t know what it’s called :(

the performance of it was fire tho i really should’ve listened to the song more before the concert :(

check in tho

check in was lit

if i was lit

hip hop unit was lit ok

getting to see mingyu sing take me to the top and straight down like a gyro drop

dream #12930138102938912389 coming true

rock is one of my favourite songs and sometimes i convince myself it’s for that reason alone

overall i really didn’t like how the setlist was put together tho???

like it didn’t BLOW ME AWAY AS A WHOLE

every performance was lit

but like i feel like the concert as a whole could’ve made more of an impact

if they had ordered the songs differently???

they performed most of the title songs pretty much in the first half of the concert

some of them would’ve done a lot better at the end!!!

the ones they performed towards the end (boom boom + don’t wanna cry) would’ve done so much better at the beginning of the concert imo???

the concert felt SO SHORT

all of a sudden they were like “this is our last song”

i almost cried

they didn’t perform fast pace + love letter and i think that’s TRAGIC

ending ment

omg

i’m not gonna lie i don’t remember what happened with anyone except mingyu

mingyu distracting me with his sleevless shirt

i stared at him the entire time

i’m not even gonna pretend i didn’t

i missed wonwoo’s ending ment and only realized like three other members’ turns later

i was like where’s wonwoo

and i realized he was second rip

mingyu was still soft with carats

boy couldn’t stand still

arms are as great as i imagined

literally i was so shameless i posted a snapchat story captioned “god bless this boy and his arms”

ok that’s it

ok so hi touch

i was freaking the fuck out (naturally... ok naturally for me i freak the fuck out over everything so this was just like 1000x the usual)

it was fast

too fast

first was chan

i practically ran up to him and was like HI

i can’t really remember the order afterwards

i almost took a step back when i saw seungcheol

like SHIT

i was blown away

like idk man i guess there was just something about him that i had never noticed before that moment i was like a foot away from him like fuck what a gorgeous human being

and like he was very... invested? in the hi touch

that’s the wrong word but it’s almost 3am ok my brain shut off ages ago

but like he was very into it and like i felt appreciated

SAME WITH VERNON

i almost said something to vernon

but fuck vernon looked at me straight in the eye

and naturally i couldn’t say anything

i might’ve said something stupid like i love you or something

but i’m pretty sure i froze before i could or i like stuttered it out who knows

vernon + seungcheol for me were the most memorable part of the hi touch

honourable mention to seokmin though

dude that boy is TALL

and also his smile would literally put the sun to shame omg

he lit up my world like nobody else (is that a 1d reference why yes it is)

i told wonwoo i love him

remember how i said wonwoo was flawless earlier

even more so up close

wonwoo has a really nice nose

i’m sorry was that comment too random

minghao was the very last

i think i tried to tell him that he did GREAT

i definitely stumbled over my words and i don’t actually know what ended up coming out of my mouth

something stupid probably

ok im rly sad about this

but i don’t remember hi touch with jihoon at all

we went through the exit of the venue was soon as the hi touch was over and i was like WAS WOOZI THERE DID I SKIP WOOZI I THINK I SKIPPED WOOZI

if he was right before/after mingyu

then i probably was just way too focused on mingyu take it in

i’m the worst i’m sorry :(

actually i’m not

i saved the fucking worst moment of my entire fucking life for last

fucking kim mingyu

literally

my least favourite person in the universe

did not fucking

look at me

while he hi fived me

he was looking at the girl in front of me

IDK WHY

but i’m so fucking pissed

ok more like i’m so fucking sad

i can’t believe

that happened to me

everyone else looked right at me for that 0.5 second interaction

but not kim mingyu

fucking kim mingyu

ruining my life

i’m like actually so sad

but i lied and i’m actually sadder about the jihoon thing

i can’t believe i can’t remember jihoon :(((

ok but they’re all... bigger? than i imagined

like not even just taller like idk on camera i feel like they all look smol but not irl???

they all have big (AND SOFT) hands but let’s be real my hands are just tiny

they’re all flawless and like lowkey paler than i imagined

was that the makeup idk

but srsly flawless

ok that’s it that’s all i remember

oh i remember another thing

carat bongs are SO PRETTY??? 

and just like in the dark omg when they’re lit up in the dark the effect is so nice

ok you all knew that

all in all i had an amazing time

i’m short and i was tiptoeing the entire time rip my legs and feet

svt’s performance is top notch

they’re all extremely bright and happy and literally showed no sign of being tired from the hectic schedule of the north american leg of their tour

thank you to everyone involved in bringing seventeen to toronto

the concert was truly a dream come true

[mildlymaddy]

I’m having a shite week and I can’t seem to get any sleep? So I wrote, as I do.

Lilo comfort fic, PG, set during the OTRA tour. Inspired by my “1d as cures for insomnia” post.

He hasn't slept in three days.

It's like he forgot how, from one day to the next.

At first he thought it was just the excitement from starting the second leg of the tour; getting back on stage after a month off is always such a rush, and since they’ve become a foursome the crowds have gotten even louder, as if they’re trying to fill up the void. But they’re on their third concert and he still hasn’t gotten a wink of sleep.

It’s starting to worry him.

Harry tells him that it's because he doesn't relax enough before bed. That he should stop looking at his phone and do some meditation instead.

Louis's desperate enough to give it a shot. He goes to Harry’s hotel room that evening (and damn if that doesn't feel weird in itself, like a slightly distorted déjà vu), and lets Harry talk him through his yoga and meditation routine.

Louis tries, he really does. Follows all the poses, does not crack a single joke (he stopped telling jokes the day before anyway. He tells shitty jokes when he’s tired, and he won’t have that). Harry tells him to empty his head, embrace the nothingness, but all it achieves is make Louis want to scream.

“Did it work?” Liam asks him over breakfast the next morning, one warm palm covering Louis's shaking hand. Louis feels like dropping to sleep right there, but they're in the middle of the hotel restaurant, and he knows from experience that by the time he gets back to a quiet place he won't feel like sleeping anymore.

“No,” Harry answers for him, mouth full of cantaloupe. He sounds sullen, maybe because Louis called him at 3am to complain. Lightweight.

“Turns out yoga stresses me the fuck out,” Louis says with a grunt, resting his forehead on the table. Liam strokes the back of his hand with his thumb, and Louis's two seconds away from falling into oblivion when Niall lets himself fall down into the chair next to him, plate piled high with eggs and ham. “Your stomach’s gonna hate you for that one day,” Louis says, getting to his feet and snatching a piece of bacon off Niall’s plate. Niall tries to pinch him, but Louis’s still got enough reflexes to dodge him.

“Where are you going?” Liam asks, eyebrows furrowing with concern.

“Bus 2,” Louis says. He knows he won't sleep, but at least there'll be nobody to get on his nerves.

--

Niall tells him that what he needs is to get piss drunk so his brain forgets about whatever it is that is keeping him up at night. Louis wants to point out that to forget, he’d have to know what’s keeping him up in the first place, but Niall’s offer sounds more appealing than Harry’s yoga, so Louis follows him out to a quiet little pub in a nook of the city that Niall seems to have found on his Irishman instincts alone.

They have a few pints, and then a few more, and that's usually when Louis would spill his guts to Niall, but this time there's nothing to spill. He can see it on Niall’s face, the look of quiet anticipation, but he just shrugs and shakes his head.

He's got no idea what's keeping him awake.

By the time they come back to the hotel, Louis's so drunk he tries to talk Niall into skinny dipping in the outdoors pool, but Niall laughs him off, leaving him face down on his bed with a basin stolen from the maids’ cupboard next to his bedside table, “just in case.”

Louis doesn't throw up.

But he doesn't sleep, either.

--

His mum tells him that he needs to go see a doctor, threatens to fly to the US if he doesn't. Louis's almost tempted to dare her - a cuddle from his mum sounds exactly like what he needs right now - but he hates making her worried by crying to her on the phone, so he executes himself.

The doctor prescribes him sleeping pills. Louis's not convinced; he doesn't like pills, unless they're the happy kind. But they’ve got a concert the next day and people in the management team are starting to whisper when he’s nearby, which is never a good sign. So he takes two of whatever the doctor’s ordered, and heads off to bed at 9pm.

By 2am he gets up again and wanders the hotel floors in search of some company, and ends up playing poker with a couple guys from the crew. They sign off at 4, and Louis goes back to his room to wait for the morning, lying on his bed, wide awake.

He bins the pills on his way to breakfast.

--

Lou tells him that she used to get the most horrible insomnia right before Lux was born, and that a friend of hers converted her to aromatherapy. She gives him a list of essential oils and other liquids, says he needs to drink some and pour some on his pillow. Says it worked like a charm for her.

To be honest Louis's got nothing left to lose. He's going on six days without proper sleep, only catching a few snoozes here and there, snoring on Liam’s shoulder in cars and airport waiting rooms until he's shaken awake. He feels like he's fraying at the edges, and that night at the concert he butchers most of his lines. It's lucky they've only had two gigs that past week, but they've got more coming up and Louis knows he won't be able to go on stage in that state again, let alone do interviews.

Just this morning he yelled at Harry for “chewing his gum too loudly” then burst into tears when Harry pouted. He’s starting to feel like a pregnant woman (mostly because Niall gleefully called him one, asking Louis if he wanted some strawberries).

(Niall’s a dick)

(Louis must remember to steal his golf clubs from him, once he’s gotten some sleep)

That night, Louis dutifully pours a few drops of bergamot on his pillow, and a few drops of honey blossom flower in a glass. He also rubs a little lavender on his wrists before getting into bed.

It feels like he’s lying in a field of flowers. At night. Wide awake.

He leaves the bottles on Harry’s doorstep, as an apology for the yelling.

--

“And none of that’s worked?” Liam asks him the next day, rubbing a firm hand over the nape of Louis's neck.

Louis lets his eyes fall shut. Maybe he should try getting a massage. “Not a one. Maybe it's a curse. Maybe Malik’s cursed me.”

“Don't say that. You know Zayn wouldn't,” Liam says, and he sounds so eager Louis can't help but laugh. He slumps back down against the couch, dislodging Liam’s hand, and stares glumly at the empty air. He wishes the bus was moving; maybe the motion would put him to sleep, this time around.

Liam starts stroking his hair, and Louis cuddles closer, closing his eyes again. “I’m so tired, Payno. I pretty much want to cry all the time,” he says, because Liam won’t make fun of him, not like Dickhead (that’s what he’s taken to calling Niall) (the dick). He takes a deep breath, and thinks back to Lou’s essential oils. They did nothing for him, but there’s a smell here that puts his mind at rest, something like… washing powder, maybe, or shower gel? It feels like a mix of several things, and Louis doesn’t know where it’s coming from, but he doesn’t care, just as long as it works. He nestles closer, resting his head on Liam’s chest.

“I told Harry I’d come with him to visit the aquarium this afternoon,” Liam says, his voice a pleasant rumble under Louis’s ear. “But I could stay here with you, if you want.” Liam moves his fingers down to scratch the short hair at the nape of Louis’s neck, and Louis hums his assent.

“You should go,” he forces himself to say, still, even though sleep feels like it’s a breath away and he doesn’t want Liam to move. “Can’t put your life on hold ‘cause I’m not sleeping.”

“Staying here with you is hardly ‘putting my life on hold’,” Liam says, and Louis doesn’t need to see his face to know that he’s rolling his eyes. “We could watch a movie? It’s nice here.”

Louis has got to grant it to him, it is nice. “If you want,” he says, stifling a yawn. Liam’s fingertips are on his temple now, brushing stray locks of hair away from his forehead. It’s getting too long, his hair. He should probably get a haircut. Maybe he should die them, too. Bright pink. Or maybe blue. He could go to that salon his mum used to take him to, when he was a kid. They always let him play with the hair curlers, and sometimes-

“Lou?”

Louis frowns. He could already see himself in the hair salon. He was about to steal a hairbrush, to smack Liam on the arse with it. “Mwhat?” he asks, wrapping an arm around Liam’s waist. Liam’s warm. Warm’s nice.

“I said, what do you want to watch?”

“You choose,” Louis says around another yawn. He shifts so he’s half lying on the couch, legs curled up. He wants to lie down, but Liam’s chest makes for the perfect pillow. Maybe Liam could lie down too. He’ll have to ask, later.

He’s dimly conscious of Liam moving against him, but the sound of the TV still comes as a surprise. He knows, just from the bouncing twinging noise, what movie Liam’s chosen, and smiles against Liam’s sweater. “Don’t say all the lines out loud,” he warns.

Liam’s chest shakes happily under him. “I promise.”

“You can say Woody’s lines,” Louis concedes, because he’s feeling generous. You should keep your friends happy, especially when they’re as comfortable as Liam is. Louis doesn’t know why he never noticed before. He took Liam for granted, forgot how perfect he was. He won’t do that again.

He feels something warm and heavy settling over his lap, and he wants to ask Liam how the fuck he managed to conjure up a blanket from thin air, but his mouth feels all pasty. Probably Liam wouldn't admit he can do magic, anyway.

The last thing he’s conscious of is the touch of warm fingers sliding on the skin of his hip where his t-shirt has ridden up. He hopes Liam knows he can slide them higher, if he wants.

The room goes quiet.

Louis sleeps.