#you are not being asked to massively inconvenience yourself in the slightest bit when doing any of these

[eyelessrabbit]

People just actively refusing to be accomedating to disabled people both physically and mentally frustrate me so God damn much. Yes it is shitty behaviour to actively choose not to do this when given the option to. If your friend is struggling to walk and out of breath you wait with them until they have energy to keep going. If someone is struggling to stand on the bus and you can give them your seat without any harm to yourself you do that. If your flatmate can't enter the kitchen because their OCD is making them paranoid about contaminatipn from the dirty dishes then clean the dishes you were going to eventually clean anyway. If your friend with ADHD loses something then help them look for it without shouting at them.

[amerrierworld]

Little Songbird (pt 3)

Part 1 | Part 2

Summary: Lady Dimitrescu becomes addicted to your voice and wants to hear you... sing some more.

Characters: Alcina Dimitrescu x fem!reader

Word Count: 3,087

Warnings: The extra Smut Chapter ;)

The next day, you were a bit exhausted from the previous night’s... activities. But you set about work the same way as usual, though buzzing with an unusual excitement about the evening to come. 

You were working on repairing a rip in one of your old dresses. You really wanted to impress the Lady and look as good as possible, now that she had taken a liking to you. As you worked, the head maid asked you about your previous night’s duties while preparing lunch.

“It wasn’t all bad.” You kept your gaze on the hole in the dress you were mending as she prepped ingredients. “The Lady seemed very preoccupied. I don’t think I was much of a bother.”

“That’s very rare,” another maid cackled while peeling potatoes next to you. “She always looks at us like we’re the dirt on the bottom of her shoes. But I suppose the pay is good.”

“Not freezing out in the cold is very good pay, I agree,” the head house maid said dryly. “I suggest you try to keep it that way.”

The maid looked flustered at the comment and scampered off, intimidated by her gaze and muttering something about more things to be done. You bit your lip to stop from smiling.

“How was it really, my dear?” The head maid turned to you, a much kinder look in her eyes now. “The Lady can be a touch.. harsh.”

“It was fine, really. I didn’t know she had a piano until now.”

“Oh, yes. I’ve never heard her play myself, but I’ve heard stories she used to perform. Especially around holidays or important events.”

“Really?” Your mouth gaped a little as she explained. “I didn’t know she was that good at piano.”

“Oh, no, dear. Not piano. She would sing. It’s a bit sad we haven’t heard her sing at all in our time at the castle. I suspect it would make her a little more approachable. But that may not be what she wants. I’ve heard she was quite a talented singer though...”

As she kept talking, the needle had stilled in your hands, your body freezing at the sudden revelation. Lady Dimitrescu, a singer? Surely not. 

“..Are you alright?”

You snapped out of your thoughts, thinking of how she would sound, what she would sing, and if you would ever get to hear her sing. 

“Yes, yes I’m fine.” You kept pushing the needle through the fabric, trying to remain calm. You felt your body tingle as you remembered the way she wanted to hear you sing. “I have to say, it is quite surprising.”

“Our Lady is definitely full of surprises.” She patted your shoulder before leaving you to your thoughts and your half-stitched handiwork. You weren’t sure if you’d be able to focus on any tasks for the rest of the day now.

Later that night, you hurried to sneak through the hallways on your way to your Lady’s bedchambers. You really didn’t want anyone to see you on the way, since you had no supplies to have an excuse of a chore to be done this time. There was one maid who caught your eye, and she gave you a curious once-over as you walked by in your nicest dress, looking like you were going out rather than going to bed. 

When you got to the door of the room, your heart was thundering in your chest. Your hands had gotten sweaty, and you didn’t understand what was so stressing for you. She had seen every inch of you already, had stripped you on top of the piano, and made you come like you never had before.

You delicately rapped your knuckles on the door, and waited for long, agonizing moments for a response. When none came, you became curious. You turned the door handle and pushed. It opened with no resistance, and there seemed to be no noise coming from inside the room.

You poked your head inside, and was once again astounded by the sheer size of the room. Against your better judgment, you slipped inside and shut the door behind you. Being early was always a good thing, you decided.

Since Lady Dimitrescu wasn’t there yet, you had time to take it in. You were drawn to the massive bed, and the dark red sheets that adorned it. Probably the best colour choice, you figured, considering the high risks of blood stains on any surface in the entire castle. 

You approached and ran a hand over the edge of the fabric, marvelling at its silkiness and expensive textures. It reminded you of everything Lady Dimitrescu liked to wear; expensive, silky, smooth...

The door slammed open, ripping the quiet thought out of your brain, and there stood Lady Dimitrescu. Her expression was fuming, angry, but it didn’t seem to be directed at you, because the minute she saw you standing in the room, it softened in confusion. Like she had forgotten you’d be coming.

You let go of the sheets and clasped your hands behind your back, curtsying quickly in fear of her anger and not wanting to step out of line. She nearly scoffed at you, and took a few long strides to the vanity, sitting down heavily on the bench.

“Help me with my dress.” Her tone was curt, demanding. You paled a little, thinking this night wasn’t gonna go how you expected it to, but still doing as she said. You were a maid, after all.

With her seated, it was easier to reach the buttons along her back, and you made quick work of them. But when you stepped back and she didn’t make any move to get out of her seat, you realized she wanted you to get the entire garment off her.

Her pointed gaze at you in the mirror disappeared from view as you approached the open back and pushed the two halves of the dress aside like peeling delicate fruit. You couldn’t help it; you ran your hands along the thick skin of her back as the dress fell off her shoulders, revealing a tantalizing bra clasp right at eye level that you could have undone quickly if you wanted to.

“You’re being quite bold, little one,” Lady Dimitrescu finally spoke, her voice deep, sultry, but not gentle like it had been last night. There was an iciness to it that stung. Your hands had been lingering a little too long on her skin.

“Forgive me, my lady,” you said, stepping away as she got up to her full height and let the dress pool at her feet. You saw heels in your view and stockings raking up long legs, but you didn’t dare look any higher. 

“Oh, pet. I didn’t mean to frighten you.” She ran a hand over your head and walked past you. Your instincts kicked in and you picked up the dress to fold tidily on the vanity’s bench. The slightest touch from her fingers made you shiver, and a blush crept up the back of your neck.

“Look at me, sweetling.”

You turned around to face the bed, where she was sitting, one leg swung over the other, hands perched behind her on the mattress. Yellow eyes looked at you and you gulped for air at the sight of her.

“You’re allowed to look, darling. It would be a bit inconvenient if you weren’t.”

Your cheeks were burning now, but you finally let your eyes wander down her frame. Her lingerie was the epitome of femininity, yet dark and sultry, just like her. The black lace hugged her curves. Her stockings were held up by a garter belt, and she kicked off her heels with one smooth jerk of her legs. 

Her tummy folded in when she was seated, and her thighs, though muscular and lean, were thick and looked strong enough to crush your entire body if she wanted to.

“Come here.” That familiar voice zapped through you and you approached the bed, briefly wondering if what you had heard about her singing talents were true. You supposed it wouldn’t surprise you. As a lady of her standard, learning an instrument or musical skill must’ve been a required lesson for her etiquette. 

She picked you up to sit in her lap, and you squeaked in surprise as she lifted you once again. A chuckle rang throughout the room and you looked up at her, relieved to see the earlier anger had dissipated from her gaze when she looked at you.

“I’m glad you’re here. I had almost forgotten you were coming,” she said, running hands soothingly over your thighs as you straddled her. “I apologize if I was a bit of a sight when I arrived. The staff in this castle is somewhat... incompetent at times.”

So it was the staff that had made her angry. Did another maid try to escape? Enter the cellar? Was there an errand boy that couldn’t keep his hands off of one of the new deliveries? 

Her head lowered to breathe in your scent, lingering right by your ear. You let out a heavy sigh at the feeling of her so close to her, and you reached out to grip her upper arms that framed your body. You ran your fingers along her skin, and she recoiled for a moment, pulling away.

You froze. Did you do something wrong? Fear etched in your eyes, you looked up at the Countess, wondering if you stepped out of line for touching her. Then her gaze focused in on you and she seemed to relax a little.

“Don’t stop.”

Was it a request? An order? You didn’t mind either way, because now your hungry hands ran over her, feeling the dimples and ridges of scars and stretched skin all over. You explored with your hands as much as you did with your eyes, gazing at her cleavage, the curve of her neck, the muscles in her shoulders. 

You ran a hand over her tummy, feeling softness and subconsciously prodding it a little with your fingertip. She giggled at the feeling. Giggled. Her body jostled a bit, moving you about. You liked the feeling and the softness, so kept your hands there.

“I can see a question in your eyes, little one,” Lady Dimitrescu purred, combing a hand through your hair. You cast your gaze downward, running a hand over her skin repeatedly, familiarizing yourself with the patterns of the stretch marks.

“Just.. something I heard today.”

“And what was that?”

You squirmed uncomfortably. “I’m not sure if you want to hear.”

A finger tipped your chin up to her piercing eyes, “I doubt it’ll go unnoticed by me, sweetling. Even if you don’t tell me now, I will hear about it.”

Your mouth went a little dry at that. She was right, nothing happened in this castle without her knowing about it, but goodness... the power behind those words made you weak in the knees. Thank heavens you were sitting. 

“I was told you used to be a singer.”

An amused look crossed her face. “Is that it? I was expecting you to announce a mutiny at hand.”

You shrugged slightly, delighted in the way her hand reached to cup the back of your neck, a thumb running over your throat. “I was hardly a singer, darling. But yes, I used to.. dabble in performance. Long ago.”

“Is that why you were so interested in my singing?” 

She grinned, teeth gleaming. “I was interested in your singing because I was interested in you, little songbird.”

She tugged you impossibly closer, leaning down and running her wicked tongue over where her hand had just been on your neck. 

“W-will I ever get to hear you?” you managed to huff out, because now her firm hands were holding your middle, exploring your body the way you had been exploring hers.

“Is that what you want? To hear me sing?”

You nodded, because the low timbre of her voice was reverberating throughout your whole body, and you suddenly needed to hear it singing a tune.

“Perhaps... if you indulge me like I had indulged your last night, you may get to hear me sing too.”

You felt the tips of your ears nearly burst into flames, but you were so desperate... so eager to please. You nearly dropped down to the floor to get on your knees. 

She chuckled, “not so fast. I have a better idea.”

Lady Dimitrescu shuffled back on the bed until she was up against the pillows. Shoving a pillow under her lower back, she crooked a finger to beckon you closer, spreading her legs. The sight of her, half in candle light, spread out for you this time, but still in charge, made you swoon.

You crawled towards her and pressed your lips against the inside of her knee. She rocked her hips a little at the feeling of your warm, small mouth on her body, and fisted a hand in your hair.

“I really won’t need any foreplay, dear,” she said in a hushed tone. “Give me your mouth.”

You raced to tug the black lace panties off of her long legs, and were met with the sight of slick, swollen flesh. A carnal desire overtook you, and you surged forwards to press your mouth against her, desperate to taste.

A soft ‘oh’ escaped the giantess at your eagerness and your soft tongue tasting her arousal without hesitation. She enjoyed teasing you, yes, making you beg and dance around the sexual gratification she could give you. But this, your hunger and desire to please, made her warm all over.

“Good girl,” she said softly as your tongue began flicking over her swollen clit, lightly and experimentally. Your hands gripped the inside of her thighs, keeping them steady and spread. She was able to look down at you, and realized her rough gripping had made your hair come undone, causing curls and locks to drop down, loose and wild. Your eyes met hers, pupils dilated, and then you sucked. 

The high-pitched cry that escaped her was broken and sudden, and it made your body flood with arousal. Your legs trembled a little, the space between your legs begging for attention.

“Oh, who would have thought you’d be so good with your tongue, sweetling?” Lady Dimitrescu moaned, “I knew you were talented.. but that mouth...”

Her sentence was left unfinished, and she bit her lip, groaning softly in the back of her throat as you kept going. Your fingers rubbed her folds, teased her entrance, kissing and sucking until you could find a rhythm that made her squeak.

A nip at the hood of her clit made her gasp delightfully, so you did it again. The hand in your hair pressed down to bury your face in her cunt.

“Wicked girl,” she growled, and you moaned against her, your face wet. “Don’t you dare stop now.”

You pressed harder, one hand pushing three fingers at her entrance without any resistance as they slid inside. Your brain wasn’t working enough to keep up the pace of both, so you curled them and pressed against that soft, swollen frontal wall, scratching with the pads of your fingertips.

She nearly howled, a string of soft curses and... were those pleads? Her eyes were screwed shut, and you looked up at her strong, soft body. You couldn’t help but reach down and rub yourself through the fabrics of your clothes with your other hand. 

Eventually she noticed when she opened her eyes again, and she chuckled, making a point of slowly rolling her pelvis into your face. 

“Couldn’t keep your own hands off of yourself?” she said, her voice slurred with arousal. You made a whiny sound, restrained by your tongue and mouth against her cunt.

“I want you to come with me,” she gasped, her thick thighs beginning to shake from approaching her orgasm. You rubbed yourself even harder, eager to do as she said. 

Her usually-reserved voice came out in whimpers and low growls, and you sucked hard at her clit again, pressing your fingers deep inside, and her whole body instantly convulsed. 

Her cries of pleasure and incoherent words of praise made you topple over the edge shortly after. Her well-kept hair was undone, her mascara a little smeared, and her hands were digging painfully into your scalp. She let go once the last tremors left her body, and you relaxed against her thigh, breathing in her smell and kissing her everywhere you could reach.

“Well done, little songbird,” she cooed, eventually managing to open her eyes again and look at you. “You really are too precious for words.”

You blushed. You extracted your hand from between your legs, grimacing a little at the stickiness of your clothes.

“Let’s get you out of those,” Lady Dimitrescu whispered softly. You let her hands lift you up like you weighed nothing, and strip you.

“But- work...” you made a feeble attempt to get up, but she tutted, holding you closely to her chest, your head resting on her breasts. 

“Nonsense. You will stay the night here. You’re in no state to return to your duties yet.” She spoke curtly again, meaning there was no room for argument, but the soft throb between your legs and the haziness of your sated mind already left you limp and jelly-like. You wouldn’t have made it out the door without collapsing even if you did try to leave.

And so, you were bundled up in her arms, the blankets pulled up around your trembling form. She had pulled out a book from her nightstand and let you relax against her body as she flicked through the pages, a quiet peace filling the atmosphere around you. And then you heard it.

With your head pressed against her chest, you heard the rumble of her voice under your ear, and then her soft humming filled the room. You held your breath as you listened to the low, baritone-like notes, and the occasional page flipping of her book. 

You didn’t know the song, didn't know if it came with words, or if she had come up with it right now, but it made your heart flutter. Did she know you were still awake? 

Eventually, a hand came off of the book and pressed on your head, helping you settle against her warmed skin a little more, and then she spoke,

“Sleep, little songbird. There’ll be plenty of times for you to hear me later.”

A/N: It really doesn’t take much to convince me to write more of a series when I love them as much as this one ;) I hope you have ~enjoyed~

[backtobackbakubabe]

Speak Easy Part 18

Dabi x Reader, Bakugo x Reader

Words : 4276

Masterlist

Reader has a siren quirk and has spent the past several years of her life as a captive being experimented on by “heroes” Now that she’s out she needs protection and safe place to heal. Who will be the one to put her pieces back together.

Words with ‘this’ is dialogue written in her journal rather than said out loud and and words with ~this~ is dialogue said in sign language rather than out loud.

**********************************************************************

It’d been a little over a week since Shoto promised to go to the doctor with you and you were getting a little nervous. At first you were just waiting for the doctors to get settled in, but then Shoto was busy helping get things up and running and evacuating people to the bunker. Now you’ve just been chickening out.

Your period was a few days late, which wouldn’t be concerning if it weren’t for your current circumstance.

You woke up this morning and made a cup of coffee before taking Bravo out for a stroll around the bunker. He loved being able to run around and meet new people. He was a hit with the kids. They loved playing with him almost as much as he loved playing with them. The only downside was, there was only two places in the entire massive bunker that he could go to the bathroom. The farm and a small animal relief area near where the trash is dumped.

Needless to say, neither smelled great, but the farm was considerably better. So here you were, sitting on a small platform that oversees the crops with a cup of coffee and a book. Bravo sitting next to you keeping watch.

It was always a little chilly down here, which you honestly preferred. It just meant you could wear lots of hoodies. The more you could hide your body the better. Ever since leaving Dabi’s house you felt like you were always being watched. You felt so exposed and you just wanted to blend into the background.

Today you wore a new hoodie that Izuku had gotten you. It was probably one of the softest things you owned, and it was the prettiest shade of blue. The blue reminded you of a certain someone’s eyes… of the beautiful blue flames they were capable of creating… but then you’d shake the thought from your head and pull it closer around you.

You were enjoying your new freedom. Not that Dabi’s house had been a prison… but you hadn’t realized how much you missed doing things on your own. You had thought being alone would be hard, but you were thriving. It was never being alone that bothered you before, it had been his absence.

Against Katsuki’s wishes… Shoto had shown you the photos of what was left of Dabi’s car. And he hadn’t been exaggerating. You had almost passed out looking at how much blood soaked the driver seat and even the road around it.

You had been so lost lately. You didn’t know how you were supposed to feel. Your heart ached. You thought you had finally found your home. You had finally started to feel your pieces come back together. Now you felt like that would never happen. He took the last few pieces of your heart with him and you felt like you would never be whole again.

Dabi had been your comfort, your safety, your home. Now you were lost.

You hated that you felt this way. You should hate him. You should curse his fucking name. You shouldn’t be crying yourself to sleep over his death.

His death…

Was he dead? You weren’t convinced. It was too convenient, and there wasn’t a body. You wanted proof. Until then you’d go on believing he was still out there.

You closed the book you were reading. You had been on the same page for the past 10 minutes.

There was no way he wrecked his car like that. You had been in the car with him twice. Yes, he drove a little fast… but he wasn’t reckless. Either it was an elaborate cover up, or someone was after him. Or maybe… someone had been after you and he had gotten stuck in the middle as collateral damage.

“You look like you’re thinking too hard.”

Shoto came and took a seat next to you. “I’d ask what’s on your mind, but I’m pretty sure I already know.”

“Am I that obvious?” You leaned your head on his shoulder.

He leaned his head on top of yours. “It’s normal. I’d actually be surprised if you weren’t torn up over it.”

You let out a shaky breath. “I can’t stop worrying about him. I keep wondering where he is. If he’s okay. If there’s some grand explanation for his shitty behavior.” You shrugged. “I’m just finding it hard to grasp that the same man who held me during my panic attacks was also secretly planning to breed me… It just doesn’t add up.”

“Guilt does weird things to people.” Shoto’s hand found yours and gave it a squeeze. “I know he’s my brother, but I have no doubts about who knew him best. I only know a version of him. I only knew what he wanted me to.” He sighed, “It was obvious you meant a lot to him, and I could see him becoming more… I don’t know… human? For the first time in years he was showing emotions that weren’t rage. It would make sense if you were starting to make him question what side he was on.”

Your eyes narrowed, “So what? You think he did some shitty stuff and decided to help me… because he felt guilty about it? That doesn’t make any sense.” You pushed away from him to look him in the eyes. “Dabi only does what Dabi wants to do. That has been clear to me since day one. So what the fuck did he want out of this? None of it makes sense. Was I just a possession to him? Was I a bargaining chip? Was I just some broken pet that he got validation from nursing back to health? What?!”

You could feel your hysteria building and Bravo put his head in your lap in an attempt to calm you down. You took a few deep breaths. “He better fucking be alive… so I can kick his ass myself.”

Shoto chuckled, “Touya doesn’t stand a chance.”

His eyes looked distant and sad. You nudged his shoulder with your own, “Hey can I ask you something?”

He blinked away whatever far away memory he was thinking about, “I don’t see why not.”

“What was he like? Touya I mean… Before he became Dabi.”

Shoto’s lip turned up just slightly, “He was the best big brother I could have ever had. He was always there to help me when our dad was too rough with me. My dad tried to keep us separated… didn’t want me mingling with what he considered to be his biggest failure.” You flinched at the casual way he talked about the abuse they endured. “But Touya would sneak into my room at night. He taught me how to handle my burns and would bring me cold soba on bad days.” His eyes glassed over, “I was devasted when he died. Well… when I thought he died.”

“I blamed my dad, we all did. So, when he came out of hiding, it was like this enormous weight had lifted off of my shoulders. I hadn’t even realized I was carrying it around, but I had never truly gotten over his death.” He chuckled, “So I went looking for him. I didn’t care if he was Touya or Dabi, I just wanted him in my life again. I’d take what I could get. So, I settled for our don’t ask don’t tell relationship.”

You felt a tear that wasn’t yours hit your lap. Of course this would be hard on Shoto, he’s potentially lost his brother for the second time. “If it makes you feel any better… He admitted to me that he loved you.” You smirked, “Well actually he told me he used to hate you which contradicts your story quite a bit. But he said he always wondered if things would have been better for you if he stuck around.”

Shoto laughed, “Sounds like him. Trying to act like the tough guy who didn’t give a shit… Just like how he was with you. I can’t tell you how many times he called me when he was gone checking on you. Texting me every single time your vitals spiked. He would check the cameras and send me voice memos about how he was going to beat my ass if I didn’t keep my hands where he could see them while we were sparing. But then he would deny it when I asked what going on between the two of you.”

“Hey, come on, I have an idea.” You stood and walked over to the corner of the field behind a small tool shed. You picked up a massive rock and moved it so it was hidden from view. “Can you burn his name into it?”

Shoto eyes darkened, “You want to have a funeral? We don’t even know if he’s dead…”

You nodded, “You’re right we don’t… but I think it’ll make it easier. We can have a place to morn him in private. Weather we mourn his death… or the death of who he could have been.”

Shoto’s shoulder slumped and eventually he nodded. His hand heated up and with his finger he wrote on the rock, “R.I.P. TOUYA”

You both sat there for a while just staring at the rock. You felt too cold standing here in the shade of the tool shed. You gripped your hoodie closer to you and held back the tears that you desperately wanted to shed. You knew you shouldn’t, but you let yourself think of Touya. You thought about what he would have been like if he had gone to UA. If he had become a hero. If you had met him under better circumstances. Would the two of you still have ended up together? Without your mountains of combined trauma would you even be the same people?

“You ready? We should head out soon or we’ll be late for your appointment.”

You rubbed your eyes and sniffled, “Yeah… let’s get this over with.”

Bravo wasn’t allowed in the medical side of the bunker, so you made a quick detour to your room to drop him off. Shoto quietly following behind you. “So how are things with you and Bakugo?”

You groaned and rubbed your temples.

Shoto chuckled, “That good huh?”

“He’s been hovering over me like I’m going to shatter into a million pieces at the slightest inconvenience. I appreciate what he’s trying to do… but it’s just too much. I told him I needed space… and we had a fight. He hasn’t spoken to me in two days.”

Shoto whistled, “I never thought I’d see the day that the two of you had a real fight. Sure, you always bickered like an old married couple growing up. But on anything serious he always caved to your every wish.” He paused at your door, “Wait. So, are you the reason he’s been extra grumpy lately?”

You blushed, “I don’t know… Maybe?”

You gave Bravo an extra scratch behind his ear before closing the door. At that same moment you heard the door next door click shut. Your eyes snapped up to meet Katsuki’s. “Oh hey… I didn’t know you were back from the surface yet.”

“Got back early this morning… I was actually on my way to see you. You have a time to get an early lunch? I want to talk to you about something.”

You played with the ends of your hair, which was an immediate give away that you were nervous. “I actually have some plans with Shoto. But I’m free after that. Shouldn’t take too long though.”

His eyes narrowed at your nervous posture and you cursed how well he knew you. “Oh yeah? What are you guys up to? Maybe I’ll tag along.”

You began to stutter but thankfully Shoto interrupted, “Clingy isn’t a good look for you Bakugo. Like she said… it’s not going to take long. Just wait here and she’ll be back soon.”

You saw Katsuki bristle and decided to step in before he picked a fight with Shoto. You stepped over to him and put your hand on his shoulder. “Hey, I just dropped Bravo off. He’s had some pretty bad separation anxiety lately so why don’t you go to my apartment and hang out with him while I’m gone. Make some coffee, pick out a movie or something. I’ll be back soon, and we can talk then.”

His posture softened as he looked you up and down. It was obvious to him that you were nervous. But he was trying his hardest to give you the space you wanted. He pulled you to him as he sighed, trapping you in his arms. “Okay fine. I’ll babysit the mutt. Can you do me a favor and bring back some migraine medication from the medical ward. My heads killing me.”

You nodded stiffly, hoping it was just a coincidence he needed something from the medical ward. “Not a problem. I have the weighted blanket you gave me on the couch if you want to take a nap while I’m gone. You look like you could use one.”

He squeezed you tighter to him. “I’ll be fine.” He leaned his head on top of yours. “I’ll be better once we stop fighting about stupid shit though.” He pressed a quick kiss to the side of your head, “I’ll see you when you get back.” He released you and looked to Shoto, “Try to behave. The two of you hanging out makes me nervous.”

Shoto chuckled, “Good. You should be nervous. If you don’t figure your shit out soon, I’ll be taking your best friend spot… Kacchan.”

You snorted as you pulled Shoto away. “Are you trying to get your ass kicked? You know only Izuku gets away with calling him that! Well… and me when he’s in a good mood. But even that’s pushing it.”

“Oh, he’ll get over it. He needs a reality check. He thinks the world revolves around him.” He led you down the hall. “He can be such a pain sometimes. But I will admit he’s so much easier to be around now than when we were in high school.” He bumped your shoulder, “In a way it’s thanks to you. As sad as it is, when you went missing, he matured. It was like out of nowhere he realized there were more important things in the world then him and his hero status.”

Something about talking about Katsuki’s emotional vulnerability while walking to the clinic to check if you were pregnant with Dabi’s child made you feel slimy. “Can we talk about something else. Literally anything else. How are you and Izuku doing?”

“Good… we settled into our room. It’s a nice enough room… but it’s right next to my dad’s room. Apparently he’s thought all this time that we were just roommates.” He threw his hands up and scoffed, “Honestly! Did he think we were both professional heroes, making tons of money, but couldn’t afford to live on our own?”

You giggled, “That sounds awkward. These walls aren’t exactly thick.”

“Oh believe me I know. And I don’t care. Poor Izuku though can’t even look my dad in the eye now without blushing.”

You laughed so hard you had to wipe away a tear. “Aw poor Izuku… He’s too innocent for this world.”

Shoto scoffed, “Innocent my ass. That man is a freak in—”

You held up a hand. “Stop, stop, stop! I don’t want to know. He is a pure innocent little muffin who used to braid my hair before workouts.”

“I thought Bakugo was the one who braided your hair? I can’t imagine him being okay with Izuku being that close to you.”

You laughed. “Oh he wasn’t at first. But mostly because Izuku was better than him at something. Kats liked to braid my hair in private while we watched TV.” You shook your head at the memory, “He actually got to be really good at it eventually.”

Shoto had succeeded in distracting you long enough to make the trip to the medical ward, but now that you were here the anxiety was creeping back in.

You paused before crossing the threshold. You knew it was important to find out once and for all if you were pregnant. But you were also enjoying living in ignorance. The fact that you didn’t know meant that you could live your life as normal. If you were pregnant… it would flip your entire world upside down. You would have a life you would be responsible for, a little human that would constantly remind you of the love that almost broke you.

If you weren’t pregnant then… you didn’t know how you would feel. Would you be relieved? Would you mourn?

Your hand found your flat stomach and clenched your shirt. You took a few steps further into the ward and was hit an overwhelming sterile smell. Your breathing hitched and your knees shook. It was too clean. It was too white. It reminded you too much of the lab.

Shoto’s hand took yours and gave it a soft tug. “Hey. It’s fine. You don’t have to do all of this. I can go in and request a pregnancy test and we can go back and do this in your room. Would that make you feel better?”

You shook your head, “Katsuki’s there…”

Shoto’s shoulders sagged, “At this point I think he’d be more upset at you hiding this from him. I’m not telling you how to live your life. I think you’ve earned the right to do whatever the fuck you want. But if it were me… I’d want as big of a support system as I could get…”

You chewed on your bottom lip as you thought about it. Did you want Katsuki to know? How would he react? What if you were pregnant? Would he be disgusted with you? Would he want to help? Your head was spiraling down a rabbit hole of what it and it was starting to make you dizzy.

“Hey, breathe! Just take a deep breath. Let’s get you out of here before you have a panic attack. Wait outside for me. I’ll get everything we need.

You pushed the wave of anxious nausea down and gave a shaky nod. “Okay… But remember to get some migraine medication for Ka—”

“Yeah. Yeah, I remember. Go sit down outside and try and focus on your breathing I’ll be right back.”

You made your way outside and immediately sat down and leaned your forehead on your knees. You needed to get these invasive thoughts under control. You thought about what Dabi used to do. He would sit with you and try and distract you by talking about random shit. You knew he’d be pissed if he knew his younger brother left you all alone during one of your episodes. The thought of him yelling at Shoto was almost enough to make you chuckle.

You took a deep breath and held it for a few seconds and started listing animals that start with the letter A. When you couldn’t think of any more you breathed out. Then you repeated the process with the letter B, then C. You had made it F when Shoto made his way back to you.

“Okay, so they gave me some weird looks. Which makes sense considering I am a gay man asking for pregnancy tests. But they didn’t ask too many questions. I have two tests, a bottle of water, some Tylenol, and a phone number for a doctor… you know, for if it’s positive.”

You took his outstretched hand and stood up. “Okay… let’s get this over with.”

Every step towards your room felt heavier than the last. You just wanted to curl up under your blanket and pretend none of this was happening.

You hesitated at your door for a few moments before remembering you were a tough bitch and barreled through it full of false confidence.

You expected to see Katsuki lounging on the couch watching something on the tiny TV. Instead you found him passed out with Bravo curled up next to him. The sight of it calmed your nerves.

“Hey Shoto, can you get some coffee going? I’m going to wake him up.” You tiptoed over to him and sat on the edge of the couch. “Hey…” You shook his shoulder. “Kats? Wake up. I need to tell you something…”

Katsuki grumbled and his arm snaked around you, pulling you down to his level. “Shhh, m’head hurts.”

You giggled “Hey stop I’m being serious… I need you to get up.”

One of his eyes cracked open. “What’s up you sound like you’ve been crying.”

You sighed, “I haven’t been crying, but I am… stressed…” He sat up and moved so you were sitting facing each other. He nodded urging you to go on. “So… The reason Dabi uh… locked me in his office was so he could go to the store to uh… buy a…. pregnancy test.”

Your eyes stared at your hands and you heard him suck in a breath. “Are you? …Pregnant I mean.”

You shrugged, “I don’t know… we got some tests from the medical ward today and I’m about to take them. I’m just… a little scared.”

A medicine bottle whistled through the air and smacked Katsuki in the face. “We got you your medicine too. You’re welcome.” Shoto was smirking over by the coffee maker.

Katsuki groaned as he stood up. “One of these days I’m gonna kick the shit out of you, IcyHot Bastard.”

He stretched and held a hand out to you. “Alright, come on. Let’s go piss on a stick.”

You felt a weight starting to lift from your shoulders. “Wait. So you’re not mad?”

He narrowed his eyes at you, “Why would I be mad? I knew what the two of you were doing. It’s not like you cheated on me. As much as I wish we were, we aren’t together.” His thumb came up to brush a tear away that you didn’t even know had fallen. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily Y/N. You being pregnant wouldn’t change how I feel about you. I would even be willing to tell people it’s mine if it makes it easier for you. Just tell me what you need, and I’ll do it.”

It was quite for a few moments, while you absorbed and processed this new development. He was surprisingly calm about all of this, and it was making it easier for you as well.

“God you’re whipped.” Shoto handed the pregnancy test to you but was smart enough to remain behind you so Katsuki couldn’t hit him.

You left the boys to bicker as you entered your tiny bathroom alone. You peed on both of the sticks and set a timer on Katsuki’s phone. The next three minutes were the longest three minutes of your life.

You paced as you tried to think of anything else. But your thoughts kept going back to that night when Dabi held you in his recliner after fucking you. He had asked about you having a baby. He had sounded so hopeful. His eyes so bright at the idea of you having a kid with him. Part of you couldn’t believe that was an act. He had seemed so sincere. You thought about how he would react if he knew you were taking a test right now.

The timer went off.

Shit.

Was your whole life about to change?

With shaky hands you picked up the first test. You held your breath as you looked to the second one to confirm it.

You opened the door with tears in your eyes.

“So, what’s it say? Am I going to be an uncle?”

You let out an audible sob. “I don’t know why I’m so upset right now.” You showed them the tests. “They’re both negative.”

Katsuki wrapped you in a hug and ran his fingers up and down your back. “It’s okay to be sad. Shoto made some coffee, I don’t have plans today. We can hang out here until you feel better.”

You cried into Katsuki’s chest as you watched some cheesy movie. He didn’t say anything. He wouldn’t even know what to say if he thought it would help.

You were grieving a child you never had, and a love that was nothing but lies. You needed to let it out. You needed to grieve so you could move on. And this is how you do that.

By the time the credits rolled your eyes were dry and you nose stuffy. “You said you wanted to talk to me about something earlier…?”

Katsuki stiffened, “Yeah, but I think it can wait. You’ve already had a rough day.”

You shook your head, “No… I want to know. I’m just going to worry about it until you tell me. I’d rather you just rip the Band-Aid off.”

He nodded, “We got word that Dabi may have been seen by your old place. We aren’t sure it was him though. Toga had been previously spotted as well, so it’s more likely that it was her. But either way, it looks like the LOV is sniffing around.”

“W—What makes you think it was Toga?”

He cleared his throat, “We have an informant working in the LOV and he told us the last thing he heard about Dabi was that Shigaraki had sent a team to collect him… but when they came back they were bloody and he wasn’t with them.”

You sighed, “Of course he wasn’t.”

*************

*The Laws* 1. No fucking shrugging 2. No drugs 3. No saying sorry for something that isn’t your fault 4.We work on communication every day 5. Wake up whenever the hell you want 6. No locked doors 7. We eat three full meals a day 8. No means no, no negotiations 9. We work on exercise every day 10. Ice cream must be kept in stock at all times 11. Accept help when it is offered 12. No lying 13. I will not initiate the sexy time without written or verbal consent.

************

Tags: tags: @falling4fandoms @wifunozomi @here-in-never-land @whore-for-anime @klecksstorys @aurorahoneybuns @theunknownrandom @insane-without-delirium @frenchsfryys @officiallydarkgeek @neofixcs @music-is-all-i-need @katsuki-bakubabe@unadulteratedtastemakerpoetry@dabislittlemouse@aimee1602@pinkhatlizzy @kunaigirlx44 @nii-sanfucker@bestgirlb @silver-stardrop@bakubby99 @squichymochi @sarahschance @babayaga67@starenemy

[britt-writes]

hi lovely i have a request for you because youre work is absolutely amazing aHH ! could you maybe so some headcanons/oneshot on lucas making his gf cry cause he's getting all pissed with his computer n is getting angry and then accidentally takes it out on his gf?? there's no pressure at all, I really do love your work and I'm so happy you write for Lucas <33

Thank you so so much, I really appreciate it, and I'm happy to do this request for you! I went for a little drabble with this one. Hopefully, I didn't make you wait too long for it. 💕 (I added a cut since it was getting a bit long and, and I don't want to invade people's dashes.)

Prompt: Lucas making his girlfriend cry

Drabble title: Poor Choice of Words

Word Count: 2008

With the semester coming to a close, you found yourself balls deep in what felt like never-ending exams to study for and detailed research papers to type. Needless to say that the hefty accumulation of college work had been piling up on you, leaving you stressed and fatigued, ultimately leaving you with no motivation or desire to get work done; just this huge blank whenever you stared at your books.

Barely able to hold yourself together with this massive headache from the free-for-all death match your thoughts were having up there, you were in desperate need of some quiet and rest. You were sure that you’d eventually break down if you didn’t.

Lucas was nice enough to let you get that quiet you needed, letting you take over his bed to nap and rest your head and eyes while he tapped away on his computer. He kept it down, which you appreciated. He’d always been the strong, silent type of guy. The only noises you could hear were the clicking of his keyboard and his foot tapping at the ground—a little tic of his, being rather fidgety.

You hadn’t quite fallen asleep, being quite restless, but you did occasionally lull in and out of consciousness. Maybe it was the damn heat wave that hit Dulvey that kept you up, or maybe it was your headache, but nonetheless, it felt nice to lie down and do nothing, worrying about nothing.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed since you had decided to lie down in your lover’s bed, but as the seconds ticked by, you could hear Lucas’ foot tapping becoming faster, seemingly aggressive. His fingers had also joined in, just tapping at the desk.

You didn’t think much of it at first, brushing it off as Lucas simply being his regular, fidgety self; he’d probably stop in a minute or so. But then you heard a low growl from him, followed by a series of curses muttered underneath his breath.

“C'mon, ya slow piece o’ shit,” you heard him say.

Shifting around, you faced him, opening your eyes. Lucas was having some issues with his computer, and one quick glance showed that his programs and even cursor were running at abysmally sluggish speeds. You weren’t sure how you hadn’t heard it at first, but his computer’s fans were loud as hell, probably working their asses off. When was the last time Lucas cleaned them? The poor old box computer sounded like it was suffering.

“Motherfucker!” Lucas suddenly yelled out, nearly jolting you out of your skin.

You flinched as he began smacking the computer, making you sit up on the bed as you stared at Lucas while his patience ran thinner with every passing second. You remained still and quiet, worried about his state of anger, but also unsure if you should intervene in an attempt to get him to simmer down. Truth be told, you hated watching people get angry, even if the anger wasn’t directed at you; it put you in a state of anxiety, wanting nothing more to keep the situation from escalating further.

“Aw, what the hell?! What now?!” He yelled as his screen seemed to freeze.

“Um, hey, babe?” You intervened, sounding very meek.

He didn’t reply, continuing to aggressively fumble with his computer, still spewing insults and curses at the device. Maybe that should have been your cue to leave Lucas be, but you didn’t take it, wanting to help him.

“Babe?” You said again, a little louder this time in case he hadn’t heard you the first time over the sound of his own voice.

“What?” Lucas said rather sharply.

“Do you want me to help or something? How about you turn it off and try cleaning the fans to start off? Then, maybe-”

Lucas whirled around to face you, the annoyed look on his face immediately shutting you up.

“What the fuck would yer dumbass know? Shit’s already fucked, so I don’t need it worsenin’. I don’t need yer fuckin’ help, so mind yer goddamn business,” he said before going back to his computer, not paying you any further mind.

You had never been on the receiving end of Lucas’ outbursts until now. Maybe you were being too sensitive, but you couldn’t help the tears threatening to fall. Sure, you and Lucas have insulted each other plenty of times in the past, but it was all obvious playful banter and teasing between the two of you with no ill intentions. This time around, he held this dead serious expression and tone, making you feel like he actually thought that of you.

Lucas was short-tempered, prone to outbursts at the slightest inconvenience, and you knew that he ran his mouth faster than his brain during those moments. He often did or said things that he didn’t truly mean, letting his anger get the best of him. He probably hadn’t even realized what he said, but that still didn’t mean that you didn’t feel as if your heart shattered in millions of pieces at his poor choice of words.

Wordlessly, you lied back down, facing the wall as you curled up underneath the blankets. A few tears streamed down your cheeks as you tried your best to keep quiet, not wanting to make a scene. You just hoped that Lucas would soon enough calm down on his own accord.

~~~~~~

He’d say that a little over half an hour had passed since his computer started acting up, but Lucas had since abandoned the device to fool around on his phone, feet propped atop his desk. At least he was distancing himself from the source of his anger.

Maybe about a year ago, Lucas would still be fuming and smashing things around his room, but ever since you came into his life, he’s been getting better at taking breaks, not fixating on whatever was irritating him in order to cool down a bit. You were there to comfort him, listen to his venting and clear his head.

Overall, a model lover with the patience of a saint to deal with him— Lucas himself would be the first to say it.

So, why the fuck did he yell at you the way he did earlier? He absolutely hated any asshole who dared make you upset; Lucas always promised to make quick work of anybody who hurt you, and all you had to do was say the word.

But now, Lucas was the one to feel like the biggest shithead ever.

Earlier feelings of fury were slowly being replaced by regret, which was an odd feeling. It was a first for him; he’s never really given a shit enough to feel regret or shame for his actions, even when he knew that he was in the wrong. But it felt different when it involved you. Maybe he still felt anger, anger at himself for treating you like shit when all you wanted to do was help him because you cared.

You were already stressed enough in the first place with all the work you had to do, and Lucas wasn’t helping by taking out his anger on you. It was an accident; he really regretted it.

Looking back at you, Lucas saw that you were still curled on his bed. You hadn’t said anything in the last half hour, so he wondered if you had fallen asleep, though you may just be ignoring him after the things he said. He didn’t like that thought, but he knew he deserved it.

He could feel panic settling in his chest— what if he fucked up for good? What if you drew the line there? What if this was the moment you realized you could do better than him? What if you walked out on him?

Those ‘what if’ questions made him nauseated. Lucas was shit at showing it, but you were his entire world. This relationship was his only motivation to even bother trying in life. Without you, he was sure that he’d either end up thrown into the streets or in jail— just some loser with no chance in hell to make it.

He had to calm the fuck down, he thought. He knew damn well that having an internal breakdown over something that was his fault in the first place wasn’t going to get him anywhere.

He stood up from his chair, cautiously approaching his bed, almost unsure of what he should do. It was like he was second-guessing himself— maybe he should let you sleep it off.

But Lucas ultimately decided to join you in bed, slowly scooting against you and draping his arm over your waist. He already felt like shit, but the feeling only worsened when he felt you flinch, and after an uncomfortable minute of silence, Lucas finally found it in himself to say something.

“Are ya mad at me?” He asked.

And he wanted nothing more than to ram his head against drywall, not impressed with the way he chose to open up.

“Are you mad at me?” You countered in a shaky tone that split his heart in two.

“Wasn’t mad at ya… jus’ the computer,” he said.

“Do you really think I’m dumb?” You asked, voice nearly inaudible.

“C'mon baby, y'know I don’t,” he said.

The silence on your end was goddamn unnerving, absolutely stressing him out. As the seconds ticked by, Lucas could feel his breathing become ragged and heavy, the atmosphere making him increasingly more anxious.

“I’m sorry,” he finally said, realizing that he should have said that in the first place.

Lucas didn’t remember the last time he apologized to someone. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if he ever did in his lifetime.

“I just wanted to help,” you said, voice quivering. “But you just yelled at me instead.”

And then the sobs came; Lucas could feel your body shake against him. Oh, God. He made you cry. Lucas didn’t think it was possible for him to feel any shittier at the moment, but here he was.

“No-no-no-no— don’t cry,” Lucas shushed, holding you tighter and burying his face in the crook of your neck.

“I’m so fuckin’ sorry, baby,” he apologized again. “I know ya just wanted to help, 'cause yer just the sweetest thing out there.”

“You looked so serious… like you really meant it,” you managed to say through choked up cries. “I feel like I’m the stupidest bother to you.”

“Didn’t mean a goddamn word of it. I know it ain’t no excuse, but I wasn’t thinkin’ right. Aw, shit— I’m the stupid piece o’ crap here. Yer hella smart, darlin’; there ain’t one part o’ ya that’s dumb,” he said. “Y'know I love ya, right?”

You were taking your sweet time to respond, making Lucas all the more anxious. He thought that he had royally fucked up beyond repair.

“Do you… d'ya still love me?” He asked, finding himself ridiculously pathetic for asking such a thing; the shakiness in his tone didn’t help either.

“Of course I do,” you said.

Lucas found some relief in the swift response at his question— no stuttering, no vague answers, no skipped beat. Your crying had also started to die down.

“So, you ain’t gonna, ya know, leave or somethin’?” He asked.

“No. I wouldn’t break up with you over something like this. It’s not worth our entire relationship,” you said. “I’m just a little sad over it. It’s… not really fun getting yelled at by someone you love, you know?”

Lucas nodded. “Yeah.”

Of course nobody liked getting into fights with their loved ones. He sure as hell knew that he’d blow a fuse if you yelled and insulted him the way he had.

“I have anger issues…” he mumbled.

“I know,” you said. “But you’re not as bad as you used to be.”

Lucas could only promise to get better going forward, and with your encouragement, he was sure that he’d be able to do it. But he’d have to try hard, and he knew it.

“Y'ave been hella stressed lately. Want me to help you study later, or somethin’?” He offered.

“If you have time, that’d motivate me.”

“Yeah, I got time. Don’t got much to do in the first place.”

You turned around to face him, wiping the remainder of your tears and offering a small smile before pressing your lips against his in a soft, sweet kiss. You then nuzzled Lucas’ chest as he cradled you protectively against him.

Apology accepted.

[cryoculus]

oddity - xiao/reader

one of my closest pals is celebrating their birthday, and i took it upon myself to write a little lantern rite piece! i don't usually post my stuff on tumblr, but it wouldn't hurt to try ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

pairing: xiao/gn!reader word count: 3,549 words premise: you and him are nothing but outsiders beneath the sea of lanterns — that’s all there is to it. ao3 link here!

“Traveler, what brings you here?”

The wind whistles through the reeds of Dihua Marsh when you hear his voice. The yaksha emerges from the shadows that cloak his form, piercing yellow eyes studying you with rapt attention. Your chest heaves as your sword glimmers out of existence before wiping a sheen of sweat off your brow. A smile graces your face — one that makes him arch an eyebrow. 

“Xiao,” you acknowledge him with a nod. “Just clearing out hilichurl camps for a commission.”

“And your friend?” he asks, arms crossed. “The loud one that floats around?”

You immediately think about how quick Paimon ditched your daily commissions just to get a head-start with the festivities down at the harbor. You didn’t particularly mind the fairy’s excitement, but it was a little lonely without her squawks of encouragement as you shilled monster after monster for the sake of scraping up some mora. But the peace of mind offered by Paimon’s absence is something you liked to indulge in every once in a while as well. Instances like this could bring about new experiences.

Such as running into the Vigilant Yaksha himself, for example.

“Paimon’s gotten quite engrossed with the Lantern Rite.” A lone sigh flees from your lips as you your gaze rivets upward. South from here, the lanterns offered to heavens can be still seen — even all the way in Bishui Plain. They dot the sky even brighter than the stars, burning through the darkness of the night so the heroes could find their way home. 

Somewhere much nearer is Wangshu Inn, its massive tree rising above the fog that began to roll in come sundown. You aren’t too far from his stronghold, but what reason does Xiao have to crawl out of his seemingly-eternal solitude? Last you’ve seen him was during that whole Starsnatcher fiasco, and you didn’t think you would cross paths again so soon. But the curious glow of his eyes — devoid of the indifference he’s worn like armor — tickles the back of your head. 

If you’re able to…could you try to convince Xiao to go with you?

Right. Verr Goldet asked that specific favor the last time Huai’an commissioned you to repair the Inn’s rickety staircase (again). You took her request without a second thought, despite being wholly unsure of how you’re even going to drag an adeptus back to Liyue Harbor. Though the rift between the land’s guardians and its people has long been mended, Xiao’s hostility wouldn’t be so easily quelled. But it’s as if the stars have guided your fates to intertwine tonight — holding each other’s prudent gazes as you both waited for the other to speak. 

Xiao is the first to break the silence. 

“I see,” he murmurs, resting his back against a sturdy tree. He draws his eyes up for only a moment before meeting yours once more. “Don’t you have a festival to celebrate, Traveler? If my memory serves me right, there’s only a few hours left before they release those pyro flowers into the sky. It’s…a popular spectacle among humans.”

You crane your head slightly, not quite catching his drift. Pyro flowers? A popular spectacle among…  

“You mean fireworks?” you snort.

“Yes, whatever those are.” Though his face doesn’t bear any hint of being flustered, the tips of Xiao’s ears turn the lightest tinge of red — barely visible in the lacking light, but you see it regardless. The yaksha mumbles something under his breath before saying, “I assume a lot of people await your return. What are you doing squandering your time here in the marsh, then?”

If Paimon were here, she would have swooped in and taken this as her one and only chance to make good on your unspoken promise to Verr Goldet. Even in the absence of your floating companion, you begin to consider your chances as well. It’s not like you assured the brooding adeptus would be present during the Rite. Just that you’d try to make sure he was there. 

And try, you did when you ask, “I was wondering if you’d want to come along, actually.”

You’re more than aware how…forward your invitation just sounded, but it’s not like you minded whatever answer he’s going to give you. In all honesty, it’d be easier if he rejected the offer and went on his way — doing whatever retired adepti do with their thousand years’ worth of free time. But as you steel yourself for his typical, cold-hearted dismissal, Xiao tilts his chin in the direction of the lanterns released en-masse in the south, gaze softening with a tenderness that’s all sorts of foreign to you. 

“I suppose I can spare a few hours.”

The lights down the docks seem a little too bright, and the jovial music rings a little too loudly when you’re conscious of an introverted companion. Xiao’s aversion to human interaction is no secret to anyone, but the adeptus manages to play it cool as you wade across a throng of festival-goers. He flinches a little when strangers bump into him, but does nothing to antagonize them. (Although you do hear the slightest hint of a growl when the stranger in question doesn’t apologize for the inconvenience.) Nonetheless, you make sure to hover around close to make sure you don’t lose him in the crowd. 

You consider holding his hand for but a sliver of a moment before chucking the idea out of the window. Xiao would probably hurl you into the next world if you touched him unsolicited, and the mere thought sends an unpleasant shiver down your spine. 

It doesn’t take long for you to spot Paimon in the midst of it all — wearing one of those peace talismans around her neck as she nibbled on a stick of grilled tiger fish. The fairy perks up at the sight of you, but she nearly gapes when she sees who it is on your trail. 

“You managed to drag that loner here?!” she shrieks, but the shock in her voice was thankfully obscured by the loud music. “How much almond tofu did you give him? Paimon bets it takes an army to make enough almond tofu to convince him to go out of hiding!” 

“No such coercion happened for them to bring me here,” Xiao clarifies. “I simply want to witness how things have been faring in the harbor since Rex Lapis’ departure. Hmph. Humans still do so much all in the name of traditions that have long lost their meaning.”

Paimon gasps, as if personally offended. “Lost their meaning…? You! You have no idea how important the Lantern Rite is to Liyue Harbor’s citizens, do you? Come on, Traveler!” The fairy huffs, tugging on your arm insistently. “Let’s enjoy the rest of the festival without the immortal party pooper.”

You gulp. “Paimon—”

“Honorary taste-tester, there you are!”

The familiar lilt of Xiangling’s voice pierces through the deafening melodies of the Rite. She bounds towards your little group with a devious smile curled across her lip — eyes shining with enough intent to scare you. Paimon is a bit more oblivious to the young chef’s intentions. Your companion even greets her once she was close enough.

“I have a huge custom order for the Qixing dinner at midnight, and I was wondering if you could try out my stuff!” She hums, spinning Paimon around gleefully enough to make the fairy forget that she was even frustrated with Xiao. Xiangling, however, notices belatedly that the said adeptus is in her company. “Oh, the guy from Wangshu Inn! What brings you here?”

“Nothing that would interest you,” the yaksha grumbles with a clipped tone. “Didn’t you say something about taste-testing for the Qixing?”

“Ah, right! Traveler!” Xiangling turns to you. “Can I borrow Paimon for a while? I’ll make sure my dad doesn’t turn her into emergency food. I promise!” 

“Hey!” Paimon protests. “Who’s turning who into emergency food?” 

With the slightest nod of your head, however, the chef is already on her merry way — dragging poor Paimon back to Chihu Rock despite her plethora of complaints. You sigh, telling yourself you’d make it up to her after you’ve attended to Xiao. Speaking of which…

“Is there anything you’d like to do?” you ask, eyes darting around for anything worthwhile to show the adeptus. When you spot Ruijin somewhere at the end of the baywalk, your brain clicks in place. “How about you and I play a few rounds of Theater Mechanicus?”

Xiao’s nose wrinkles at the unfamiliar name. “Is that another one of those strange human contraptions?” 

“Uh… You can say that.”

You’ve played a couple of rounds with Xingqiu yesterday when the Feiyun heir practically dragged you here after collecting your rewards from the Adventurers’ Guild. So to speak, tower defense games were not your strong suit. At first, dozens of imaginary enemies have slipped past your elemental wards all because of your poor strategizing skill. It’s a good thing that Xingqiu was quick to pick up on the rules, though. He managed to win you both enough peace talismans to make the Xiao Market turn maximum profit. 

Your current comrade, however, is probably just as terrible as you are.

“I don’t get this,” Xiao snarls, banging a fist on the wooden table. “Why can’t I just attack the enemies myself when they arrive? The towers are too weak to defend anything.” 

Ruijin chuckles, ruffling the yaksha’s hair as if he was a child. “Patience. The more you play, the stronger the mechanici become. Besides, warriors grow to be more powerful the longer they stay on the battlefield. You know that pretty well, right?”

You have to nudge Xiao’s leg from underneath the table to keep him from pouncing at the game master right there. When you manage to catch his gaze, you shoot him a stern look to keep him in check. Deep inside, though, you’re actually panicking. What if he turns the harbor into some anemo wasteland all because of a silly board game? If that happens, Zhongli might just declare you persona non grata even if he was already retired. 

Thankfully, Xingqiu’s knowledge about Theater Mechanicus has rubbed off on you enough to win you a round. Ruijin rewards you both with only half the amount of talismans you garnered when teaming up with the Feiyun heir, but Xiao doesn’t really need to know that. He stares at the jade-carved sigils disinterestedly before pocketing them in his garbs, walking away without a word. As your shoulders droop, you sigh and shoot Ruijin an apologetic look before chasing after your charge.

“Sorry if that wasn’t really your type of past time,” you tell him, matching the adeptus’ pace as he marches forward. “We could always try other—”

“If you’re going to play diplomat between myself and the harbor, listen here,” Xiao interrupts, shooting you a yellow-eyed stare. “Neither of us belong in this city. You’re an outlander, and I’m an adeptus — two creatures that aren’t meant to delve too deep into human affairs. And if you have even an ounce of respect left for our respective origins, you won’t tell me off for being needlessly hostile.”

Huh. So he’s aware that he’s being needlessly hostile. 

Though he spoke each word with an even-toned seriousness, all you could hear was a boy that didn’t want to be scolded at. You were a bit surprised to see him lose his patience over such a trivial thing earlier, too. Your mouth quivers into a soft smile, marveling at how human Xiao can be despite insisting he was anything but. 

“I’m heading up to Mount Tianheng for a while,” he announces once the two of you reach the end of the road. “Are you coming or not?”

You have half the mind to tease him for checking in on you despite the fact that he can pretty much leave you in the dust if he wanted to. Xiao glances at you impatiently when you don’t give him an answer, and you decide to push away any thought of discouraging him for another time. 

“Sure. What are you going to—”

Several things happen all at once. Xiao cuts your words short when he dons his mask, clouds of miasma curling around his form in black wisps. He scoops your knees from underneath you, cradling you to his chest faster than you can blink. And you can only gape in disbelief as he princess-carries you across the city — jumping from roof to roof with the grace of a feline. Xiao doesn’t spare you any looks the entire time, keeping his eyes forward as he holds you securely in his grasp. This reminds you a little of the time he saved you from falling to your death when the Jade Chamber collapsed, but you dared not think of it too much. 

You resign yourself to the fact that there isn’t much you can do when Xiao is in Bane-of-All-Evil form and observe the way the tattoos on his arm glow with each precise movement instead. In spite of the corrosive energy emanating from the rest of his body, the aura that those blue-green marks emit is…serene. It’s not all that different from the feeling you get whenever you stand near a Statue of the Seven in Mondstadt. Hm. Maybe Venti’s personally keeping an eye on this one. 

The yaksha only stops when he’s gotten to a high enough vantage point, setting you back to your feet. You’re just about to thank Xiao for the ride, but you notice the way his knees buckle once his mask dissolves from his face.

You’re quick to rush to his side, supporting his weight with yours as he shoots you a disgruntled look. All those millennia of keeping to himself probably made Xiao unused to your efforts, but you don’t give him enough room to complain. 

“You’re hurt,” you observe as you help him down to the grass. “I thought I was just seeing things when we went to the karma-heavy cavern, but that obviously isn’t the case. Does that have anything to do with the Abyss?” 

“You think I’d let myself be tainted with that kind of corruption?” Xiao scoffs, chest heaving as he catches his breath. “This miasma…is all my own. This is the price I have paid for eons of endless slaughter — I’ve already told you that, haven’t I?”

You shoot him a pointed look. “Hasn’t anyone told you that you’re too hard on yourself? No wonder Zhongli is still worried about you until now. The medicine he asked me to give — it’s for that…miasma, isn’t it?”

 Xiao closes his eyes, sighing. “Traveler, I don’t wish to discuss this.”

“Well, you don’t have to.”

That makes him stare back at you inquisitively. Xiao’s gaze narrows slightly as you lift your hands — palms facing the clueless adeptus before you. Your eyes flutter closed, recalling the way you purified a dragon’s tears all those months ago. This is essentially the same, right? Xiao is a creature who has borne the weight of suffering for countless millennia, much like Dvalin when the Abyss manipulated him into their favor. You managed to purge the murky tintage of their corruption despite the odds being against you. 

Who’s to say that easing Xiao’s suffering — even just for a moment — is impossible?

Flecks of starlight dance across the tips of your fingers, glowing in time with the marks of anemo he bears on his arm. Xiao watches you, stunned into silence as he lets you do as you please. He spots a brush of qingxin flowers just a few meters away, but the gentle breeze that wafts across his face makes him feel like he’s not sitting atop Mount Tianheng, but on another peak entirely. When the yaksha closes his eyes, the qingxin blooms have morphed into gentle cecilias, dancing to the rhythm of a lone bard’s lyre. 

Peace, he thinks. He hasn’t known peace in a long, long time. 

When Xiao opens his eyes again, it’s to the feel of his head resting on top of a plush surface. The moment his mind registers your face staring down at him with a kind smile, he nearly scrambles out of your lap out of reflex, but you keep him securely in place. 

“You napped for quite a while there,” you inform him, one hand smoothing down his hair. “Any interesting dreams you want to share?” 

He relaxes back onto the grass when he realizes there’s no escaping you. This oddly reminds him of the quieter days of the Archon War, when Guizhong would let him doze on her lap for hours on end. 

“I’d like to…apologize,” he whispers.

“For what?”

After a few moments, Xiao sits upright and this time you don’t stop him. Demonic yellow eyes turn to the vastness of harbor before him — reminding him that the war has long ended, and a new era is in bloom. 

“When I told your friend that these traditions have lost their meaning… I bear no ill will to the words,” he murmurs, fingers grazing the blades of grass beneath the both of you. The lanterns have grown in number this year, and they’re much more beautiful compared to when he watched them every year from his balcony in Wangshu Inn. “They offer their lanterns, they offer their wishes to lead their heroes back home. But humans have always enjoyed the leisure of being blissfully ignorant.

“Only a handful of adepti have survived to this day. The heroes they sing their praises to have long passed — unable to hear a word of their gratitude. So forgive me if I deem such traditions pointless.” He closes his eyes and thinks of all he’s lost — his fellow yakshas and the gods that have fallen to defend Liyue alongside Rex Lapis. Though he’s convinced himself he’s already desensitized, Xiao still feels the slightest twinge in his chest. “It’s not as if we ever expected recompense for our deeds. We protected what needed protecting because it is our duty. Nothing more, nothing less.”

He expects you to wear the crestfallen look that Verr Goldet always shows him whenever he rejects her invitations to come along to the Lantern Rite. Xiao has been faced with that expression year after year by countless others, and he thinks it would be no different if you look at him the same way, too. But instead of a tight-lipped frown, your mouth twitches into a grin — barely containing your own laughter as the adeptus starts to glare at you.

“Oh no, I didn’t think someone like you would take that so literally,” you say, wiping a tear off your face. “Xiao, listen to me. The Lantern Rite isn’t just for thanking those who protected Liyue; it’s also to honor their memory. Sounds to me like you’re really downplaying how much the people respect the adepti. Isn’t that little truce with Ningguang enough proof of that?”

Xiao stares at you listlessly, and gets the feeling that he’s being made fun of. “I…might have failed to consider it in that light.”

You sigh, pulling your knees to your chest as you rest your chin on top. “So Zhongli isn’t the only adeptus who has rocks for brains here.”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing! Say, do you want to let me hitch another ride and we can craft some lanterns down at the harbor? My treat.” 

He decides to overlook the backhanded insult you just made about himself and his lord. This is an era of peace — everyone jokes about things like that more often now. And though it comes as quite the pain to him, Xiao thinks it was time he learns the way of the people from this era sooner rather than later. 

As you scribble your own wishes on the sides of the lantern you crafted, Xiao watches attentively on the sidelines. You told him to write down his own as well, but people like him only wish to serve the purpose he’s been summoned to make. Xiao has already fulfilled that eons ago.

When you both let the lanterns drift up above, the pyro flowers — fireworks, he mentally corrects — bloom across the night sky. They come in dazzling colors that make even him, an adeptus, wonder how human craftsmanship has evolved to this day. Perhaps you were right. Xiao does downplay many a detail about the people of Liyue, and that goes beyond their utter respect for the adepti. 

However, the citizens are the last thing on his mind as his yellow eyes continue to observe you — the soft gasp that escapes your lips when the display of fireworks has reached its end; the golden lanterns shining across your eyes as you beam with delight. Xiao doesn’t remember the last time he’s ever thanked anyone — fearful that they’ll react the same way he does when faced with pure gratitude. Would you turn away indifferently? Would you dismiss his sentiments even after quelling the darkness in his heart with a single move? In the end, he decides that none of it matters.

You and him are nothing but outsiders beneath the sea of lanterns — that’s all there is to it.

[tinyinvadr]

Hi, I am asking if you can do SpongeBob as a Tiny 4" Sponge in an AU where he's small and tinier than the rest of Bikini Bottom as well as him able to size-shift (Shapeshift) as a giant at times as well? I am such a SpongeBob and G/T Fan. I like ZIM too.

Sure thing! I don’t see SpongeBob G/t super often, so I’m always happy to contribute something different! (I’m pretty sure I’m the only person with a G/t blog that’s primarily focused on Invader Zim, ‘cause every one of my obsessions turns into G/t at some point and it all gets very specific, so, yeah)

Anyway, I decided to do the episode “F.U.N.” I changed up most of the dialogue, ‘cause I don’t really like rewriting stuff word-for-word. There are a few lines that are the same, and I left the F.U.N. Song intact, ‘cause it’s a classic, but I tried to make it my own take on the episode. I did want to write an original story, but I have a hard time coming up with ideas for SpongeBob because the show’s been on for so long and has done so much already.

F.U.N.

SpongeBob hadn’t planned on going to the Chum Bucket that day. Well, no one did. Ever. But he had a good reason to go.

It was a standard day at the Krusty Krab. Plankton stole a Krabby Patty, and SpongeBob got it back. But for the first time, the sponge noticed something different about him: insecurity.

No matter how hard he tried, he would never amount to anything ever. His restaurant would always be a failure. HE would always be a failure.

SpongeBob felt for him. He always did, though he wouldn’t admit it to Mr. Krabs. The two of them had quite a bit in common, actually. They were both small. Really small. And it’s hard to make a name for yourself when you’re small. Hard to get others to take you seriously.

But they were also quite different, in that SpongeBob was an optimist. No matter the challenges thrown his way, he would always overcome them, and he believed Plankton could too if he had that support. If he only had a friend, if only the entire town hadn’t deemed him irredeemable, he could have a chance.

And SpongeBob was determined to give it to him.

So there he stood, at the massive doors of the Chum Bucket, waiting for Plankton.

Opening the doors, the tiny owner of the Chum Bucket was met with the equally tiny sponge.

“Oh. It’s you.” He sighed. “Haven’t you tormented me enough?”

“No. I mean, I was wondering if you wanted to come out and play with me.” SpongeBob replied.

“What!? No!” Plankton immediately slammed the door, but SpongeBob stayed there. He wouldn’t give up that easily.

After a minute, Plankton opened the door again.

“Alright, SpongeBob. I’ll comply. What exactly are we doing?”

The sponge was overcome with excitement. Instead of giving him a proper answer, he just wrapped Plankton in a tight hug.

“You have three seconds to let go of me.” Plankton stated, unamused.

SpongeBob let go and backed off, but he couldn’t stop smiling. They were finally making progress! He could turn an enemy into a friend!

So the two of them walked all the way to Jellyfish Fields, where the sponge would introduce his newest friend to one of his favorite activities: riding jellyfish.

“I don’t see the point of this. Why would I want to ride around on an electric blob if it’s not being used to destroy my enemies?” Plankton asked.

“Because it’s fun!” SpongeBob exclaimed, already seated on top of a jellyfish and holding on tight as it swam in loop-de-loops.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Plankton asked, rolling his eye.

The jellyfish dropped SpongeBob off on the grass beside Plankton, and he was left at a standstill. Fun? He’s never had to explain that before. It seemed pretty self explanatory. But with how lonely and hated he was, it was only reasonable that Plankton never experienced fun.

“Well... it’s kind of... sort of like... let me spell it for you.”

“F is for friends who do stuff together! U is for you and me! N is for anywhere, anytime at all! Down here in the deep blue sea!”

Though at first unsure how to react to the spontaneous musical number, Plankton quickly chimed in.

“F is for fire that burns down the whole town! U is for uranium! Bombs! N is for no survivors! WHEN YOU-“

“Plankton! Those things aren’t what fun is all about.” SpongeBob interrupted. “Let me help you.” He took Plankton’s stubby little hands and started to dance with him.

“F is for friends who do stuff together! U is for you and me! Try it!”

“N is for anywhere, anytime at all! Down here in the deep blue sea!”

Just from briefly dancing, Plankton looked exhausted, so SpongeBob let go of his hands. “I... I don’t understand this. Why do I feel all tingly inside? Should we stop?”

The sponge chuckled. “No, that’s how you’re supposed to feel!” He caught the slightest trace of a smile on his new friend’s face, and soon, it was a full-fledged grin.

“Well, I like it! Let’s do it again!”

“F is for frolic through all the flowers! U is for ukulele! N is for nose-picking, sharing gum, and sand licking, here with my best buddy! Ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!”

After a day of fun, the two parted ways. The next day, SpongeBob went into work, where his boss, Mr. Krabs, was waiting for him.

“SpongeBob, I need to talk to ya.” The crab lifted the tiny sponge up with his claw and set him down on the nearest table.

“What’s the problem, Mr. K?” SpongeBob asked.

“Look, son. I saw you and Plankton at Jellyfish Fields yesterday. I understand that you want to help, but I know him. He’s sneaky, he’s manipulative, and he’s after me secret recipe.”

“Mr. Krabs, I really think he’s changed. We had so much fun yesterday, I don’t think he could’ve faked that.”

At that moment, Plankton entered the Krusty Krab. Mr. Krabs glared at him from across the room, then went back into the kitchen.

“SpongeBuddy, are we still going to the movies?” Plankton asked.

“Of course!” SpongeBob replied cheerfully, looking down at Plankton from his perch upon the table.

The small green creature made his way towards the pulley-powered elevator that was attached to each table. Certain accommodations had to be made in order for the miniature sponge fry cook to do his job, so elevators were a staple.

Mr. Krabs quickly returned from the kitchen, his claws suspiciously concealed behind his back. “Before you go, I thought I’d offer your good friend something, if he’s interested...”

He revealed that he was holding a plate with a freshly made Krabby Patty on it, and placed it on the table, right beside Plankton.

“No, thanks. We’re getting popcorn.” He replied, shaking his head.

The crab continued to glare at him, waiting for him to make his next move, but Plankton just stood there.

“Well, we’re leaving now! See ya later, Mr. Krabs!” SpongeBob announced as he escorted Plankton back to the elevator. As they left the restaurant, the sponge glanced back at his boss as he let out a disappointed sigh. Though he did feel the slightest bit guilty for befriending Mr. Krabs’ worst enemy, he knew it was the right thing to do.

The two of them arrived at the movie theater, and got the biggest box of popcorn at the concessions stand. Due to their size, they were able to share one seat. Though really, their seat was the edge of the popcorn box, which was seated upon the actual theater chair.

Everything was fine. Well, except for when Bubble Bass sat on them, but he got back up right away to go after the spilled popcorn.

Then, everything changed.

The movie suddenly stopped, and on the screen, the shadow of Mr. Krabs was being projected.

“Listen up! He’s deceiving ya! Reach into his pocket now and take what he’s got!”

SpongeBob and Plankton exchanged glances, neither of them sure what was happening.

“I’m talking to you, SpongeBob!”

Reluctantly, he did as he was told, only to find that somehow, Plankton did steal the Krabby Patty after all.

“What? Plankton, I... I thought you changed! I thought... we were friends...”

The sponge began to cry, which only meant one thing. Normally he was very small, but whenever he cried, SpongeBob absorbed his own tears, causing him to grow to massive proportions.

It was a well known fact that SpongeBob had the tendency to expand, what with how absorbent he was, and no one was particularly threatened by him, due to his kind and friendly nature, but it was still a major inconvenience, especially when this happened indoors.

“Plankton... why would you lie to me?” SpongeBob asked in a soft whimper.

Suddenly, Plankton began to cry as well.

“I’m sorry! I used you to get the Krabby Patty! But now that I have you as a friend...”

SpongeBob wiped his tears. Plankton was really about to give up the Krabby Patty, the sandwich he’d been trying to steal for his restaurant all this time, for the sake of their friendship.

“It changes NOTHING!”

Letting out an evil laugh, the tiny green villain ran off with the Krabby Patty, ripping right through the movie screen.

After calming down, the sponge reverted back to his default form, and Mr. Krabs met him at his seat.

“Mr. Krabs... I’m sorry. It’s my fault he got the Krabby Patty.”

To SpongeBob’s surprise, his boss smiled, and lifted him off the seat. “It’s alright, lad. You had the right intentions. Anyway, Plankton didn’t get away. Don’t you know what’s behind these screens?”

Mr. Krabs walked over to the screen and pulled it aside at the rip, revealing that Plankton and the Krabby Patty slammed right into the wall behind it.

“Solid concrete!”

Plankton stepped away from the wall, stumbling around in a daze. “You’ll pay for this, Krabs.” He mumbled.

“You know, SpongeBob? Maybe you should keep trying to be his friend. It keeps him confused.”

Maybe one day he would change, but SpongeBob learned that day that you can’t expect progress that quickly, no matter how catchy the song is.

[eligos-venator]

Business, Lizard, And Doubts

[Word count: 1617]

"I'm not even going to ask what you did to cause this. Chances are, knowing you, you bit off more than you could chew again and it blew up in your face." Clad in a faded, tan leather jacket, the gray-haired hyur who had spoken glanced over at the approaching Au Ra. He had been given a description of what to look for, though he could still scarcely believe that his normally-cautious client had been turned from what seemed a Hyur with defects into a massively tall Au Ra, who stood at seven fulms. Not as large as some of the Steppe Xaela he had seen before, but it was a rare sight still to see anything close to that height beyond the occasional Roegadyn when he was in the cities. He had chosen to meet here, right by the outer walls of Aleport, in order to ensure that this was a legitimate meeting and not some trap Eligos had set to clean up his tracks. And by all indications Eligos had told him the truth, as the slit, draconic eyes that stared right back at him after he spoke were clearly those of his client.

"Bit too close to home on that, taking a more literal interpretation there." The familiar, deep and mellow voice of the man's client responded as the Au Ra strolled up to the Hyur, stopping at eight fulms away to indicate he didn't intend to get too close. As always, business was to be conducted at arm's length, to ensure neither side put a dagger in the other's back. "I've had to shelve several projects now, both because I don't fit in those armors now and as these damned horns mean I can't fully encase myself in steel and keep hazards out."

The Au Ra would pace over to the wall, not to lean against it, but so that he was in its shadow, to keep the summer sun out of his eyes and to get some measure of shade as they spoke. He wasn’t a fan of meeting out here where there was open ground, but had decided to go with the request to indicate he intended no trouble, nor wished to harm. He had even gone without his gauntlets that day in order to reassure that he had no hidden weapons on his person, as this associate was quite well aware of how some of his equipment typically had hidden weaponry built into it.

"Speaking of shelving, how does it feel to finally be able to reach the top shelf without a stepladder?" The expression on the Hyur was a mix of glee and amusement as he regarded his business partner. "Is it everything you ever hoped it would be?"

"I swear, if you weren't such an asset we would not be talking at all. Focus on the damned subject at hand." Fangs were revealed as Eligos snapped at his business partner, his annoyance clear in his tone as the golden draconic eyes narrowed while focusing on the source of irritation, the slit pupils briefly narrowing as he stared the man down. "Can you or can you not get me the materials I specified in the letter? Some of them may require purchase from the vultures out on the war front. I will reimburse for any and all purchases, for up to ten times their value, in case they try to rip you off. But the sooner I get these parts, the sooner I can get answers on how to get back to normal. I'm willing to forsake negotiations and haggling if it speeds up acquisition even marginally."

"Alright, alright! I'll get you your damned parts, gearhead. However! If I may be so bold.. Why are you so eager to return to your old self?" The Hyur pressed as he crossed his arms and leaned back against the stone wall. His brow raised as he regarded his associate, his green eyes giving the man a once-over and noting his attire and how, seemingly for once, the man had decided to show off, wearing an open, sleeveless vest that bared both his midriff and arms, and accompanying boots and pants that were lower cut. It was a far cry from the usual, where Eligos would only ever show up in a business suit or otherwise semi-formal attire at the absolute least. A far cry, indeed, and an oddity he couldn't quite wrap his head around no matter how much he looked at the man.

"You're taller now, and likely stronger, too. The loss of your recent works may be frustrating, but.. I've never heard you be willing to spend even three times the value of an object in order to obtain it. Ten times, out of the gate? I can scarcely believe I'm hearing it from you with how cautious you are in spending gil. It’s normally a struggle to get you to even consider paying even a single gil more than an object is worth. There has to be something else. I'm not stupid, Eligos. If I was we wouldn't be talking, and you certainly wouldn't have asked anything of me, let alone trusted me with acquiring technology for you to cannibalize."

"Beyond the horns? Others hate my appearance and it disturbs them greatly, more so than my old self." Came the swift response from the pale, stone-hued Au Ra as his brow furrowed in irritation momentarily before softening up as his expression shifted to a more neutral resting state of mild displeasure. "The dislike from my Xaela coworkers? Understandable and acceptable. This is a twisted mockery of them. I acknowledge that but have no control over it. But their views matter little to none. Just.. several others who are quite close have expressed.. concern, to put it mildly, and a great dislike of this self. And have expressed such liberally."

"I do mind the financial damage this has caused me." Eligos continued as his shoulders rolled forward in a lazy shrug, a habit that hadn't changed even with the change into an Au Ra. "Yet it is a mere drop in the bucket in the scheme of things. So too is the pain I feel from all the times I've fallen or shut doors on my tail. My body will heal from that in time. It doesn't dictate my decisions for me, even if the horns are a constant inconvenience. I've multiple reasons to want to return to normal, even if they may not seem the most pressing in urgency."

"Just.. I am not certain, all the same." The Au Ra would glance down, his golden gaze cast upon his right hand as he held it out, extending his fingers and then clenching them into a fist before releasing the fist with a flick of the wrist. "Stronger. Durable. And as you said yourself, tall. But most importantly, I'm finally at ease. I hate this body, but at the same time I feel an odd sense of peace, just knowing I no longer stand out as badly as I used to. I’m not as out of place. Getting used to my new height and how it has thrown off my sense of balance is oddly irritating, given I've always wanted to be a proper height, but everything else?"  

A small, sad smile formed upon Eligos's lips as he continued to stare at his bare fist and arm. His tone dropped as he continued, the conflict clear in both voice and features as he regarded himself. "It feels right. I feel at ease enough to wear more relaxed outfits that show skin off for once in my life, without others threatening me to make it happen. I almost don't want to give this peace up, despite knowing what troubles it will bring. But those important others feel differently. They hate it. And when I've brought it up, I'm reminded I should just return to normal and forget about this sense of peace. I need to keep working and this is interfering, so it is best to be rid of it. All of it. Even those closest have said such. So it will be. Provided you get the parts I need."

"I don't care enough to judge. You're paying for this, so it'll be done. You've got your reasons, Eligos, but it sounds a lot like you'll regret no matter what choice you make." The Hyur casually commented as he pushed himself off the wall, his arms dropping into his pockets as he hunched forward, not meeting the Au Ra's look in the slightest. The business-minded Eligos, showing actual emotion? It was unsettling and the less he had to see it, the better. This change wasn't all it was cracked up to be, clearly. "Right then. I'll get ya yer goods. Usual rate, of course. You may not be profiting, so we'll change it to five percent of the fees paid for the equipment, plus the usual daily rate. 

With a dismissive wave, the Au Ra turned away from his associate, wandering off as his black, whip-like tail swished back and forth. "I've got armor to set up and refit to work for this body. Being like this is no excuse to skip out on work. Contact me if anything is required that wasn't provided in the package sent. And consider your terms agreed to."

The Hyur stalked off in the opposite direction, offering little more than taking his right hand out of his pocket to wave as he too departed. "You must be desperate to agree so easily. Looking forward to future business as always, Eligos. Try to not kill yourself with your next project here. I’d miss the paychecks."

[lexi-the-twilight-dragon]

RED VS BLUE: The Ghost Trick AU

His consciousness slowly slips back, but he’s wide awake when he hears a gun cock. In front of him is two men, one in a coat pressed up against the wire fence with his hands up, the other in a suit pointing a shotgun at him.

“So long, kid.”

He tries to stand. He tries to raise his hand. He tries to say something. The guy in the coat is going to die, dammit!

But he can’t move an inch. And they can’t hear him.

Because he’s already dead.

So yeah, the Ghost Trick AU, everyone! I’ve tried to avoid massive Ghost Trick spoilers for those who haven’t played it yet (if you haven’t, go do so, it’s my favourite game for a reason) but in any case, enjoy the casting!

In order of appearance:

Church (Sissel): He’d give you his backstory if he knew what it was. As it currently stands, all he knows is that he’s a recently deceased individual who has a decently good taste in suits and a decently good sense of humor. Okay, maybe that sense of humor is mostly snark, but hey, give him some credit, he’s dead for fuck’s sake. And apparently, being dead comes with the added bonus of “Ghost Tricks”, the power to interact with the living through inanimate objects, travel through telephone lines, and by connecting with the souls of other recently deceased individuals, rewind the last four minutes of their life to avoid their untimely demise. He’s not doing it out of some kind of altruism. He’s just got twelve hours before his soul traverses to the next dimension, and he’d kinda like some help remembering who he is before that happens. That’s all. ‘S only fair.

Detective Dexter Grif (Lynne): Recently promoted to the Detective Division of New Armonia PD, Grif’s something of a loose cannon, and tends to put what he thinks is right before police bureaucracy, which often gets him in trouble. He’s recently gone off the grid again to re-investigate a cold case in which his superior got convicted of murder, which has led to him meeting with Church for information. Which led to him getting shot. Which led to Church saving his life. Which led to him getting arrested for Church’s murder. But as if he’s gonna let a simple arrest get in his way. He’s got a mission to follow. And if he can get food on the way, that’ll be awesome. (Also, don’t call his coat yellow. It’s fucking orange.)

Felix (Nearsighted Jeego): An assassin tasked in ending the life of anyone who knows about “Shisno”. Grif hasn’t the faintest idea what that is, but apparently he’s on that hit list anyway. However, Felix’s overconfidence proves to be a weakness Church is only happy to exploit.

Ray: A deceased soul possessing a desk lamp, Ray is Church’s “Ghost Trick” mentor. Despite ghosts communicating through telepathy, Ray manages to keep most of his thoughts, knowledge, motive and real name included, secret from Church. He requested Church’s help solving the mysterious goings on in New Armonia in return, but frankly, Church only has twelve hours here. He’s got his own mystery to solve, thank you very much.

Chairman Malcolm Hargrove (Commander Sith): The head of Charon Industries, the technological megacorporation of a foreign nation intent on unimaginable power and possibly global domination. Though their technology is far more advanced than any other nation’s, said technology is… “off”, to say the least. And should anyone get in Hargrove’s way, he has his own “security force” to call on. 

Counselor Aidan Price (Masked Lieutenant): Hargrove’s immediate subordinate, in charge of carrying out his immediate orders and organizing the orders to others. Never breaks his impassive expression, which can even creep Hargrove out sometimes.

Locus (One Step Ahead Tengo): Another assassin under Hargrove’s employ, much more calm and collected than his rival Felix. He prefers to get ahead of his “prey” and lie in wait in the shadows, rather than tail them and face them directly.

Freckles (Missile): A small fluffy “freckled” dog, technically belonging to “Master Grif”, but much more attached to his roommate, “Master Caboose”. He would do absolutely anything for his masters, and not even an inconvenient death will stand in his way. He’ll make instant friends with just about anybody, so long as they don’t mind a bit (a lot) of barking.

Michael Caboose (Kamila): A ten-year-old kid who’s been in the foster care system since he was very young. He’s lived with Grif and Freckles for about five years, after an unfortunate incident with his previous foster family. He may or may not have witnessed said incident, but always seems to be cheerful nevertheless. He’s not the smartest in school, but he’s pretty good at making convoluted contraptions out of random objects, not always with the permission of his guardian. 

Doctor Emily Grey (Superintendent): A former medical examiner of New Armonia PD, now in charge of maintaining and supervising the Zone D junkyard, where Church was murdered. She apparently lives in her office with her pet pigeon Carmen, and spends her free time conducting strange experiments and research in her basement.

Lord Donald Doyle (Justice Minister): The minister of justice in charge of administering the sentences of condemned criminals. It’s a complicated and stressful job, and as such has taken its toll on his health and his relationship with his family. A recent squabble with his wife has resulted in her walking out with their son in tow, which has only worsened his psyche.

Detective Vera Ohio (Detective Blue): A detective at Grif’s precinct, who, well, can get a little too enthusiastic sometimes, especially if she has a chance to prove herself to a superior officer. This enthusiasm doesn’t always equal results, however, so she’s stuck at her current ranking. She’s a little jealous of Grif for making Detective so quickly by comparison.

Detective Ezra Idaho (Detective McCaw): Ohio’s investigative partner, who’s more than used to her antics and usually tries to be her voice of reason, with little success. He’s a little concerned with Ohio trying too hard to impress their superiors, and the ridiculous example set by their inspector.

Doctor Lucy Connecticut (Medical Officer): The medical examiner in Church’s murder case, though no one’s ever seen her on a case before. But, she has her credentials, and she gets the job done, so no questions need to be asked. Right?

Inspector Maddison Carolina (Inspector Cabanela): The head of the Special Investigation Unit, and basically the whole police force second only to the Chief. Though her track record, like her coat, is spotlessly flawless, her manner is jarringly blasé; don’t for a second let this fool you though, she did not get to her position by fuffing around, and heaven have mercy on you if she catches you doing so yourself. Most of the other detectives are wary of her as a result, but she’s surprisingly close to and protective of the newest one, Dexter “Dex” Grif.

Detective Frank DuFresne (Detective Rindge): Oh, did you forget about the other detective at the precinct? You wouldn’t be the first. Whether it be the way he tries not to be in the way, or the way his face disappears under his hat, DuFresne always manages to find a way to be invisible. This isn’t always a hindrance however; as such he’s often assigned to reconnaissance or covert information gathering, a job he excels at. He also excels at it where he’s not meant to, so if anyone knows the low-down on the precinct’s gossip, it’s him.

Officer Dick Simmons (Typical Cop 1): A cop from Grif’s old beat, Simmons would have been promoted to Detective too… if he wasn’t such a nervous wreck in the presence of a superior, which at his rank is always. He tries his best, he really does, but he always seems to stumble over himself at the last minute, and the detectives he works under don’t help either, admonishing him for the slightest mistake and taking the credit when he actually accomplishes something. He also has a massive crush on Grif, which can hinder his mental processing even more. Grif is completely in denial about it, even when others point it out.

Sarge (Chicken Chef): Proprietor, manager and head chef of The Red Base Chicken Kitchen, home of smoky fried chicken, questionable budgeting decisions, and many a husky Southern ballad, all courtesy of the man himself. All of the above factors are an acquired taste, but that doesn’t bother him. As far as he’s concerned, he’s living the dream.

Officer Ben Matthews (Officer Bailey): One of six guards patrolling Stella Nova Penitentiary, Matthews is a stickler for the rules 99% of the time, but in spite of himself, there are two people he can never say no to; one is Grif, and the other is his fellow officer Bitters. The stress of trying to keep the latter in line causes him a lot of pent up energy that… occasionally has to be let out. In hilarious fashion. Bitters has videos.

Officer Antoine Bitters (Other Officer): Once upon a time, Bitters was a hopeful, enthusiastic young police cadet raring to take on the bad guys and protect the streets of New Armonia. But now he’s stuck on guard duty in the most uneventful prison ever, and his attitude is beginning to match his name. With not much “guarding” necessary, he spends most of his time creating his own entertainment, often at Matthews’ expense.

Officer John Andersmith (Prison Guard 1): Like Matthews, Andersmith is a stickler for the rules, but he’s immune to Bitters’ mind tricks, and everyone’s learned to keep the two apart if they’d like to finish the day without a headache. Even if he wasn’t such a stickler, the prisoners aren’t likely to try and bully him; he’s six foot, jacked and pretty good with a firearm. 

Mina South (Spiky): Lead guitarist and singer of rock band The Dakotas, South’s music career hit a screeching halt when she was arrested for leaking government secrets during a concert being aired live around the nation. She’s the most abrasive of the inmates of Stella Nova, but her attitude wins her nothing, especially from Andersmith.

Peter Maine (Sausage Head): A man of few words, Maine’s actions speak for him; he’s in Stella Nova for breaking in to the New Armonia Metro PD and holding the Chief Commissioner at flamethrower-point. Though he may seem intimidating, in reality he’s easily pushed around, particularly by fellow inmate South.

Detective David Washington (Detective Jowd): The third and quietest of Stella Nova’s inmates, Washington used to be New Armonia’s, and perhaps even all of Chorus’, best detective, Carolina’s best friend, and Grif’s mentor, until he was convicted for the murder of his partner Tucker. Though Grif maintains his innocence, he himself has accepted his guilt and his sentence. His detective skills haven’t blunted, though, so little happens within the prison walls that he doesn’t know about.

Officer Charlie Palomo (Prison Guard 2): The newest of the six guards in Stella Nova, Palomo’s innocent worldview has yet to be tarnished by the harsh realities of his job, or the exasperation of his colleagues. If anyone’s going to start a casual conversation, with a colleague or with an inmate, it’ll be Palomo, and he rarely gets the hint to keep his mouth shut unless explicitly told.

Chief Vanessa Kimball (Chief): Though only in the top spot for a few years, Kimball is an instant magnet for respect, even from top investigators such as Carolina. In fact, she and Carolina have struck up a rapport in the wake of Washington’s arrest, and she’s the only one Carolina will open up to. All the other members of the force, however, shouldn’t dream of getting casual with her.

Detective Franklin Donut (Memry): Once the Special Investigation Unit honed in on the location of an illicit deal taking place at The Red Base Chicken Kitchen, they sent in their undercover operative Donut in the guise of a recently hired waiter. He’s not too undercover, though; the bubbly, flirtatious attitude and unwitting innuendos are all the real him, which often makes his workmates, at the restaurant and the PD, very, very uncomfortable.

Girlie (Beauty): One of two operatives of Charon taking part in the deal at Red Base, though she’s beginning to regret agreeing more by the minute. Even if her “sixth sense” makes her invaluable for the job, her teammate is intolerable, and the other party is taking forever to turn up.

Sharkface (Dandy): Girlie’s teammate, Sharkface also has distaste for their assignment, though it has more to do with the extent of work he has to do than the company. If anything, the company is all that makes this assignment worth it, though she greatly disagrees.

Lopez (Bartender): The barman of The Red Base Chicken Kitchen, Lopez is very, very jaded from his job. His boss is borderline insane, the waiter is driving him insane, and no one understands a word he says anyway. The only thing that keeps him there is the knowledge that, at the very least, his work is appreciated.

Officer Katie Jensen (Prison Guard 3): As the closest in age to Palomo, and the one who can tolerate his company the best, Jensen is usually the guard on the same round as him. They can often be found chatting in the halls until they’re needed, at which point she’ll also be one dragging him back to work.

Officer Averil Volleyball (Prison Guard 4): The first time anyone sees Volleyball in uniform, they swear she’s a kissogram, not an actual officer, and her flirtatious manner doesn’t help. But anyone who actually tries to have their way? Those handcuffs aren’t for play, buddy.

Lavernius Tucker (Alma): Washington’s partner, well-known among his colleagues for being the one that can make the usually stoic detective crack the dorkiest smile ever. Or, well, was well-known, until Washington was charged with his murder. Could their relationship really have gone that sour that quickly?

The only characters of import that I have yet to cast are Doyle’s wife and son, and the hippy that makes DuFresne’s job harder than usual. Any ideas from those who know both franchises?

(Also, please don’t judge me for my choice of given names of the Freelancer and Chorus characters. I put a lot of thought into them.)

[allenmelendez]

Psychological Struggles Entrepreneurs Face And How To Overcome Them

You’re an entrepreneur – an individual who doesn’t let fear become a paralyzing factor. Daunting odds and discouraging investors don’t stop you from achieving your dream. You are an Alpha in a sea of people warning you to never break the status quo. You have values, talents, and gifts to offer the world. There are seemingly unconquerable obstacles that come complimentary with the life of an entrepreneur – but you already know that, and it doesn’t scare you off. That’s why you’re here. But depending on the stage of your business ventures, some of these obstacles and mental barriers may arise. Don’t panic. You’re still the entrepreneur you know yourself to be. These obstacles are all things we as humans struggle with in creating something of value in such a competitive, busy world. I’ll walk you through these common obstacles and ensure that they’re merely speed bumps on the way to your success. 1.     “Where Do I Start?” If you’ve already embarked on the long, arduous process of deciding the type of business you’re looking to get into (fashion, drop-shipping, kitchen goods, etc.), then congratulations! You’ve gone further than 90% of the entrepreneurial population. Now comes the even harder part – actually taking that first step to turning your idea into a tangible business. It may be that you don’t have enough knowledge of your market, or maybe you aren’t familiar with the technical aspects of creating and maintaining an e-commerce store. In these cases, you’ve lucked out. In the age of the Internet, there isn’t much information you can’t access. Maybe it’s a decisive issue; you can’t make up your mind on whether you’re ready and motivated enough to take the plunge. Don’t worry, this is common. But, you can’t let it push your aspirations to the side. One of the most important qualities a successful entrepreneur can have is a sense of urgency. Whether that urgency arises after a traumatic incident like a divorce or being fired from your job, you can’t ever lose it if you want your business to continue growing. There’s a world of hungry people out there – make sure you never become a full one. Motivation comes in many shapes and forms. Whether it’s exercise, meditation, keeping your finances to a minimum to induce that hunger, etc., just make sure it’s dependable and sustainable for you. 2.     Marginal Benefits While the entrepreneurial legends devoted every waking moment to their businesses, that isn’t always possible for us. You may have a family to support. A degree you’re still earning. Your business model could be slow in the initial stages and you may not have the financial cushion to take huge risks. Whatever the case, if you have to start your business on the side, you have to make sure you’re allotting enough time and effort for it to thrive. This means taking a highly disciplined, highly methodical look at your decision making in regards to time management. You have marginal benefits that come along with making decisions, and you also have costs. Our natural psychology typically leads us to take action and make decisions when the marginal benefits outweigh the costs. Take for example, your living space. Every day it gets a little bit dirtier with dust, water bottles, little pieces of trash, dishes, etc. We could take five minutes out of each day for basic cleaning, but you don’t. You usually wait – wait for the grime to significantly show, the bottles to pile up, and the sink to get full before we start cleaning – and then it takes us two hours to finish. This happens because, at first, we don’t see the benefit of fixing small inconveniences worth the time in the long run. The marginal benefit isn’t worth the cost. Yet, when it gets unbearable, the brain decides our quality of living is worth taking the extra hours out of the day to clean it all up. The marginal benefit outweighs the cost. What does this have to do with your e-commerce site? As an entrepreneur, it’s crucial you reevaluate this natural decision-making process. Your business needs to thrive, and there are a lot of little tasks that need to be done over a long period of time in order to build your venture into a successful, profitable business. Eventually, you should hire out other people to complete these small tasks so you can focus on big, money-making moves. But until then, it’s on your shoulders, and being the slightest bit lazy will compound into business-killing excess. These things won’t show you any returns immediately, which is why it makes this one of the hardest psychological obstacles to push past in the e-commerce world. Things like choosing the proper products to sell online, setting up ads, publishing blog posts, (heck, building a blog!), developing social media channels, etc., all takes time, and provide hardly any instant gratification. But, in the long run – if you do these things daily, and conquer this mental barrier – it’ll pay off and be the building blocks of your brand. 3.     The False Productivity Façade This is a super common problem that affects e-commerce entrepreneurs especially. This is when you feel like you’re doing something useful… but the action really does nothing to further your business goals. The biggest culprit: tweaking your website. Customizing the layouts, rewriting the copy, adding new photos – you can spend TONS of time messing around and updating your website. But, is it really furthering your goals? In the beginning stages of your business: no. Eventually, once you have a following of readers, website redesign can compound that audience and show them you are evolving with the times. But as I said, in the beginning you have to simply get your website up and done. Try to move on without looking back… you’ve got plenty of other high-level tasks to do. At the end of the day, it’s all about revenue. Is your site gaining traction in your niche? Are you getting visitors? Most importantly: are you getting sales? Just get your site up, interact with real people, and get them to make some real purchases. 4.     Failure vs Momentum It’s easy to stay motivated and productive when you finally see results. On the flip side, there’s nothing more discouraging than the massive amount of failure you first encounter when launching an e-commerce business. Momentum is the good stuff, the kind of things that push you forward and make you want to keep hashing away at your work. Things like seeing a boost in traffic, ranking higher for your keywords in SEO, and being sought after as an influencer. Failure is the drudgery that keeps e-commerce entrepreneurs from continuing their dream. And it’s rarely failure in the large sense, but small setbacks that make your work feel hopeless. This is the kind of stuff that causes most people to give up after a few months. Things like posting a really great article that drives no traffic and gets no exposure, or sending emails for guest posts and asking for product reviews only to get radio silence. So, how can you cope with failure? In the words of Craig Ballantyne, author of The Perfect Day Formula, “fail forwards.” Also, consistency. In the face of denial, you’ve got to keep hammering away. One of the best ways to do this is by creating a written plan that details how you’re going to market your site: How many bloggers you’ll contact for product reviews, backlinks, guest posts, etc. Marketing your e-commerce site ultimately comes down to a numbers game. The longer you stick it out, the more attention you bring, the higher your sales will be. Again, nothing builds more momentum than pure revenue. Building a successful online platform and selling great products is a long and arduous road filled with more mental barriers than most people can handle. But you’re an entrepreneur. It’s never going to be easy. That’s why you love it! And also why only a select few in this world are successful. Don’t let any of these psychological obstacles keep you from building your dream – because at the end of the day, these obstacles can’t stand up to your determination.

Anthony Aires Chief Executive Officer

Real Deal Productions, LLC Prosperity Publishers, LLC

P.S. Keep coming back to AnthonyAires.com to take advantage of the free goodies I share.

If you’d like to connect with me my social media channels you can go here:

Anthony Aires Facebook Timeline: Friend Here >> http://facebook.com/anthonyaires

Anthony Aires Facebook Fan Page: Follow Here >> http://facebook.com/aireswins

Anthony Aires Never Stop Striving Facebook Group: Join Free Here >> https://www.facebook.com/groups/AnthonyAires

Anthony Aires Twitter: Follow Here >>http://twitter.com/anthonyaires

Anthony Aires YouTube: Subscribe Here >> http://youtube.com/anthonyaires

Anthony Aires Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/anthonyaires

If you’d like to learn how I make 6 Figures A Year Working Only 90 Minutes A Day?

Then jump on my next FREE webcast workshop that’s going to show you how I does it…

You can sign up for FREE for the next one by saving your seat here >> https://anthonyaires.com/webcast

Thanks for being a part of the Aires Crew

from Anthony Aires https://anthonyaires.com/5370/psychological-struggles-entrepreneurs-face-and-how-to-overcome-them/ from Anthony Aires https://anthonyairescom.tumblr.com/post/164668392960

[jenarodriguez]

Psychological Struggles Entrepreneurs Face And How To Overcome Them

You’re an entrepreneur – an individual who doesn’t let fear become a paralyzing factor. Daunting odds and discouraging investors don’t stop you from achieving your dream. You are an Alpha in a sea of people warning you to never break the status quo. You have values, talents, and gifts to offer the world. There are seemingly unconquerable obstacles that come complimentary with the life of an entrepreneur – but you already know that, and it doesn’t scare you off. That’s why you’re here. But depending on the stage of your business ventures, some of these obstacles and mental barriers may arise. Don’t panic. You’re still the entrepreneur you know yourself to be. These obstacles are all things we as humans struggle with in creating something of value in such a competitive, busy world. I’ll walk you through these common obstacles and ensure that they’re merely speed bumps on the way to your success. 1.     “Where Do I Start?” If you’ve already embarked on the long, arduous process of deciding the type of business you’re looking to get into (fashion, drop-shipping, kitchen goods, etc.), then congratulations! You’ve gone further than 90% of the entrepreneurial population. Now comes the even harder part – actually taking that first step to turning your idea into a tangible business. It may be that you don’t have enough knowledge of your market, or maybe you aren’t familiar with the technical aspects of creating and maintaining an e-commerce store. In these cases, you’ve lucked out. In the age of the Internet, there isn’t much information you can’t access. Maybe it’s a decisive issue; you can’t make up your mind on whether you’re ready and motivated enough to take the plunge. Don’t worry, this is common. But, you can’t let it push your aspirations to the side. One of the most important qualities a successful entrepreneur can have is a sense of urgency. Whether that urgency arises after a traumatic incident like a divorce or being fired from your job, you can’t ever lose it if you want your business to continue growing. There’s a world of hungry people out there – make sure you never become a full one. Motivation comes in many shapes and forms. Whether it’s exercise, meditation, keeping your finances to a minimum to induce that hunger, etc., just make sure it’s dependable and sustainable for you. 2.     Marginal Benefits While the entrepreneurial legends devoted every waking moment to their businesses, that isn’t always possible for us. You may have a family to support. A degree you’re still earning. Your business model could be slow in the initial stages and you may not have the financial cushion to take huge risks. Whatever the case, if you have to start your business on the side, you have to make sure you’re allotting enough time and effort for it to thrive. This means taking a highly disciplined, highly methodical look at your decision making in regards to time management. You have marginal benefits that come along with making decisions, and you also have costs. Our natural psychology typically leads us to take action and make decisions when the marginal benefits outweigh the costs. Take for example, your living space. Every day it gets a little bit dirtier with dust, water bottles, little pieces of trash, dishes, etc. We could take five minutes out of each day for basic cleaning, but you don’t. You usually wait – wait for the grime to significantly show, the bottles to pile up, and the sink to get full before we start cleaning – and then it takes us two hours to finish. This happens because, at first, we don’t see the benefit of fixing small inconveniences worth the time in the long run. The marginal benefit isn’t worth the cost. Yet, when it gets unbearable, the brain decides our quality of living is worth taking the extra hours out of the day to clean it all up. The marginal benefit outweighs the cost. What does this have to do with your e-commerce site? As an entrepreneur, it’s crucial you reevaluate this natural decision-making process. Your business needs to thrive, and there are a lot of little tasks that need to be done over a long period of time in order to build your venture into a successful, profitable business. Eventually, you should hire out other people to complete these small tasks so you can focus on big, money-making moves. But until then, it’s on your shoulders, and being the slightest bit lazy will compound into business-killing excess. These things won’t show you any returns immediately, which is why it makes this one of the hardest psychological obstacles to push past in the e-commerce world. Things like choosing the proper products to sell online, setting up ads, publishing blog posts, (heck, building a blog!), developing social media channels, etc., all takes time, and provide hardly any instant gratification. But, in the long run – if you do these things daily, and conquer this mental barrier – it’ll pay off and be the building blocks of your brand. 3.     The False Productivity Façade This is a super common problem that affects e-commerce entrepreneurs especially. This is when you feel like you’re doing something useful… but the action really does nothing to further your business goals. The biggest culprit: tweaking your website. Customizing the layouts, rewriting the copy, adding new photos – you can spend TONS of time messing around and updating your website. But, is it really furthering your goals? In the beginning stages of your business: no. Eventually, once you have a following of readers, website redesign can compound that audience and show them you are evolving with the times. But as I said, in the beginning you have to simply get your website up and done. Try to move on without looking back… you’ve got plenty of other high-level tasks to do. At the end of the day, it’s all about revenue. Is your site gaining traction in your niche? Are you getting visitors? Most importantly: are you getting sales? Just get your site up, interact with real people, and get them to make some real purchases. 4.     Failure vs Momentum It’s easy to stay motivated and productive when you finally see results. On the flip side, there’s nothing more discouraging than the massive amount of failure you first encounter when launching an e-commerce business. Momentum is the good stuff, the kind of things that push you forward and make you want to keep hashing away at your work. Things like seeing a boost in traffic, ranking higher for your keywords in SEO, and being sought after as an influencer. Failure is the drudgery that keeps e-commerce entrepreneurs from continuing their dream. And it’s rarely failure in the large sense, but small setbacks that make your work feel hopeless. This is the kind of stuff that causes most people to give up after a few months. Things like posting a really great article that drives no traffic and gets no exposure, or sending emails for guest posts and asking for product reviews only to get radio silence. So, how can you cope with failure? In the words of Craig Ballantyne, author of The Perfect Day Formula, “fail forwards.” Also, consistency. In the face of denial, you’ve got to keep hammering away. One of the best ways to do this is by creating a written plan that details how you’re going to market your site: How many bloggers you’ll contact for product reviews, backlinks, guest posts, etc. Marketing your e-commerce site ultimately comes down to a numbers game. The longer you stick it out, the more attention you bring, the higher your sales will be. Again, nothing builds more momentum than pure revenue. Building a successful online platform and selling great products is a long and arduous road filled with more mental barriers than most people can handle. But you’re an entrepreneur. It’s never going to be easy. That’s why you love it! And also why only a select few in this world are successful. Don’t let any of these psychological obstacles keep you from building your dream – because at the end of the day, these obstacles can’t stand up to your determination.

Anthony Aires Chief Executive Officer

Real Deal Productions, LLC Prosperity Publishers, LLC

P.S. Keep coming back to AnthonyAires.com to take advantage of the free goodies I share.

If you’d like to connect with me my social media channels you can go here:

Anthony Aires Facebook Timeline: Friend Here >> http://facebook.com/anthonyaires

Anthony Aires Facebook Fan Page: Follow Here >> http://facebook.com/aireswins

Anthony Aires Never Stop Striving Facebook Group: Join Free Here >> https://www.facebook.com/groups/AnthonyAires

Anthony Aires Twitter: Follow Here >>http://twitter.com/anthonyaires

Anthony Aires YouTube: Subscribe Here >> http://youtube.com/anthonyaires

Anthony Aires Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/anthonyaires

If you’d like to learn how I make 6 Figures A Year Working Only 90 Minutes A Day?

Then jump on my next FREE webcast workshop that’s going to show you how I does it…

You can sign up for FREE for the next one by saving your seat here >> https://anthonyaires.com/webcast

Thanks for being a part of the Aires Crew

source https://anthonyaires.com/5370/psychological-struggles-entrepreneurs-face-and-how-to-overcome-them/ from Anthony Aires http://anthonyairescom.blogspot.com/2017/08/psychological-struggles-entrepreneurs.html

[anthonyairescom]

Psychological Struggles Entrepreneurs Face And How To Overcome Them

You’re an entrepreneur – an individual who doesn’t let fear become a paralyzing factor. Daunting odds and discouraging investors don’t stop you from achieving your dream. You are an Alpha in a sea of people warning you to never break the status quo. You have values, talents, and gifts to offer the world. There are seemingly unconquerable obstacles that come complimentary with the life of an entrepreneur – but you already know that, and it doesn’t scare you off. That’s why you’re here. But depending on the stage of your business ventures, some of these obstacles and mental barriers may arise. Don’t panic. You’re still the entrepreneur you know yourself to be. These obstacles are all things we as humans struggle with in creating something of value in such a competitive, busy world. I’ll walk you through these common obstacles and ensure that they’re merely speed bumps on the way to your success. 1.     “Where Do I Start?” If you’ve already embarked on the long, arduous process of deciding the type of business you’re looking to get into (fashion, drop-shipping, kitchen goods, etc.), then congratulations! You’ve gone further than 90% of the entrepreneurial population. Now comes the even harder part – actually taking that first step to turning your idea into a tangible business. It may be that you don’t have enough knowledge of your market, or maybe you aren’t familiar with the technical aspects of creating and maintaining an e-commerce store. In these cases, you’ve lucked out. In the age of the Internet, there isn’t much information you can’t access. Maybe it’s a decisive issue; you can’t make up your mind on whether you’re ready and motivated enough to take the plunge. Don’t worry, this is common. But, you can’t let it push your aspirations to the side. One of the most important qualities a successful entrepreneur can have is a sense of urgency. Whether that urgency arises after a traumatic incident like a divorce or being fired from your job, you can’t ever lose it if you want your business to continue growing. There’s a world of hungry people out there – make sure you never become a full one. Motivation comes in many shapes and forms. Whether it’s exercise, meditation, keeping your finances to a minimum to induce that hunger, etc., just make sure it’s dependable and sustainable for you. 2.     Marginal Benefits While the entrepreneurial legends devoted every waking moment to their businesses, that isn’t always possible for us. You may have a family to support. A degree you’re still earning. Your business model could be slow in the initial stages and you may not have the financial cushion to take huge risks. Whatever the case, if you have to start your business on the side, you have to make sure you’re allotting enough time and effort for it to thrive. This means taking a highly disciplined, highly methodical look at your decision making in regards to time management. You have marginal benefits that come along with making decisions, and you also have costs. Our natural psychology typically leads us to take action and make decisions when the marginal benefits outweigh the costs. Take for example, your living space. Every day it gets a little bit dirtier with dust, water bottles, little pieces of trash, dishes, etc. We could take five minutes out of each day for basic cleaning, but you don’t. You usually wait – wait for the grime to significantly show, the bottles to pile up, and the sink to get full before we start cleaning – and then it takes us two hours to finish. This happens because, at first, we don’t see the benefit of fixing small inconveniences worth the time in the long run. The marginal benefit isn’t worth the cost. Yet, when it gets unbearable, the brain decides our quality of living is worth taking the extra hours out of the day to clean it all up. The marginal benefit outweighs the cost. What does this have to do with your e-commerce site? As an entrepreneur, it’s crucial you reevaluate this natural decision-making process. Your business needs to thrive, and there are a lot of little tasks that need to be done over a long period of time in order to build your venture into a successful, profitable business. Eventually, you should hire out other people to complete these small tasks so you can focus on big, money-making moves. But until then, it’s on your shoulders, and being the slightest bit lazy will compound into business-killing excess. These things won’t show you any returns immediately, which is why it makes this one of the hardest psychological obstacles to push past in the e-commerce world. Things like choosing the proper products to sell online, setting up ads, publishing blog posts, (heck, building a blog!), developing social media channels, etc., all takes time, and provide hardly any instant gratification. But, in the long run – if you do these things daily, and conquer this mental barrier – it’ll pay off and be the building blocks of your brand. 3.     The False Productivity Façade This is a super common problem that affects e-commerce entrepreneurs especially. This is when you feel like you’re doing something useful… but the action really does nothing to further your business goals. The biggest culprit: tweaking your website. Customizing the layouts, rewriting the copy, adding new photos – you can spend TONS of time messing around and updating your website. But, is it really furthering your goals? In the beginning stages of your business: no. Eventually, once you have a following of readers, website redesign can compound that audience and show them you are evolving with the times. But as I said, in the beginning you have to simply get your website up and done. Try to move on without looking back… you’ve got plenty of other high-level tasks to do. At the end of the day, it’s all about revenue. Is your site gaining traction in your niche? Are you getting visitors? Most importantly: are you getting sales? Just get your site up, interact with real people, and get them to make some real purchases. 4.     Failure vs Momentum It’s easy to stay motivated and productive when you finally see results. On the flip side, there’s nothing more discouraging than the massive amount of failure you first encounter when launching an e-commerce business. Momentum is the good stuff, the kind of things that push you forward and make you want to keep hashing away at your work. Things like seeing a boost in traffic, ranking higher for your keywords in SEO, and being sought after as an influencer. Failure is the drudgery that keeps e-commerce entrepreneurs from continuing their dream. And it’s rarely failure in the large sense, but small setbacks that make your work feel hopeless. This is the kind of stuff that causes most people to give up after a few months. Things like posting a really great article that drives no traffic and gets no exposure, or sending emails for guest posts and asking for product reviews only to get radio silence. So, how can you cope with failure? In the words of Craig Ballantyne, author of The Perfect Day Formula, “fail forwards.” Also, consistency. In the face of denial, you’ve got to keep hammering away. One of the best ways to do this is by creating a written plan that details how you’re going to market your site: How many bloggers you’ll contact for product reviews, backlinks, guest posts, etc. Marketing your e-commerce site ultimately comes down to a numbers game. The longer you stick it out, the more attention you bring, the higher your sales will be. Again, nothing builds more momentum than pure revenue. Building a successful online platform and selling great products is a long and arduous road filled with more mental barriers than most people can handle. But you’re an entrepreneur. It’s never going to be easy. That’s why you love it! And also why only a select few in this world are successful. Don’t let any of these psychological obstacles keep you from building your dream – because at the end of the day, these obstacles can’t stand up to your determination.

Anthony Aires Chief Executive Officer

Real Deal Productions, LLC Prosperity Publishers, LLC

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from Anthony Aires https://anthonyaires.com/5370/psychological-struggles-entrepreneurs-face-and-how-to-overcome-them/

[zerosuspensiongogo-blog]

Double Sided Coin || Self

Gogo wasn’t Hogwarts’s biggest fan, but she always dreaded when it ended. It wasn’t necessarily what she’d be missing: her small group of friends, easy access to knowledge and resources, or the freedom of the grounds.

No, it was what she would be forced to gain. Which was the presence of the man waiting for her when she stepped off of the train on Platform Nine and Three Quarters. He was tall with broad shoulders, salt and pepper hair, and a scruffy beard matched his somewhat scruffy getup. He had thick, dark eyebrows that mirrored Gogo’s own and they raised when he saw her. A forced smile tugged at his lips as he waved her over. Her stomach churned but she ignored it, sluggishly shuffling towards him while blowing a large bubble. The popping noise rang with distaste.

“Hey kiddo! Long time no see. You ready to go?” He asked, his voice saccharine to the point that she wanted to gag.

“Mm,” was all she responded with, giving a half-hearted shrug. She could see his features twitch a little as he sighed deeply and held out an arm. She glared at it, purposefully not moving for long enough to be inconvenient but not long enough for him to say anything. Then, she merely stepped back.

“Can do it myself now,” she said simply. He blinked in surprise.

“I didn’t know you got your appiration license.”

“My birthday was in April, I turned 17,” she reminded him in a deadpan voice.

“Ah, right. I knew that,” he added quickly at the end. And indeed, she had gotten a card from him with the bare minimum “Happy Birthday From Dad” on it on time, but she was sure at this point that he had some sort of timer and forgot about the date at all other times.

“Are you sure you want to try apparating all the way to the portkey? It might not be safe--”

“I got it.”

“I really don’t think--”

“I got it!” She snapped more aggressively, shooting him a glare. He frowned deeply but then shook his head with a sigh.

“Alright...you go first and I’ll stay behind in case you splinch anything.”

‘Maybe I’ll get lucky and splinch my fucking head off,’ She thought to herself, without an inch of sarcasm. With a loud, resounding crack, she disapparated.

Much to her misfortune, she apparated in the right place, body parts and all.

Her father owned a small house in the Irish countryside. Some would call it cozy, with worn architecture and massive fields of wheat going in all directions. A dirt path several kilometers long would eventually take one to a small muggle town, where the locals gathered in the pub every night to communally drink and make merry.

Or to drown out the misery of their shitty lives, Gogo thought to herself. The sparse, insect infested home was a prison for the Slytherin girl, one that she’d been subjected to for months on end ever since her parents separated. It had only been for holidays and winter break when she’d started school. But after her mother lost her job, she couldn’t afford to raise Gogo in the summer months while also taking care of her ailing parents. So after some good old fun custody disputes, she was forced to waste her summers away in a home that she hated with a man she hated even more.

Most of the time, she’d walk, bike, run, skate--whatever method of escape she could use to travel into town. But there were only so many times you could cycle through the same handful of buildings before you wanted to blow your brains out. And Gogo was already way past that point.

So she sat in her father’s garage--no, it was a joke to even call it that. First of all, they didn’t have a car. Even if they did, it would have to be one of those smart cars if it ever hoped to fit. Instead, it was just a crappy dusty room littered with miscellaneous crap. Gogo was pretty sure there was garbage in here that she’d tossed out last summer. But, it was one of the few spaces that had a halfway decent fan and that she sat under, working on some schematics for an invention she’d been working on for awhile now. She’d been reading up on magnetic levitation and had some ideas on how to combine it with magic to create even faster methods of transportation. Many of the first editions had been duds but she had a feeling this time it would be different.

However, she had to stifle a groan when she heard the door open up behind her. She didn’t even bother looking up from her notebook, nor did she stop her sketching. She could just feel his ooze creeping up behind her, breathing down her neck.

“What’cha drawing there, kiddo? Is it anime?”

Her grip tightened on her pencil, her knuckles turning white. She took a deep breath and tried to force herself to relax, just continuing her work as if he wasn’t there.

“No. They’re schematics for an invention I’m working on. It’ll use electromagnetic suspension and free-form levitation charms to reduce friction and enhance speed and maneuverability,” she replied dryly. She could feel her father shifting uncomfortably behind her.

“Ah. Right.” A silence fell between them. She hoped that he would take a hint and go away. He did not.

“So, how did quidditch go this year? Did Slytherin win?”

Gogo felt her jaw clench. “How should I know? I’m not on the team.”

“Aw c’mon, but you have to at least watch, right? Y’know, you should really consider trying out again. I’m sure you’re better now than you were a couple years ago.”

“It wasn’t because I wasn’t good enough, it was because people on the team fucking hated me,” she growled, her pencil strokes becoming a little harsher.

“Merlin, Leiko, not everyone is out to get you. It’s alright that you didn’t make the cut the first time around, you don’t have to go blaming it on everyone else.”

She could already feel her hands beginning to shake in anger. No one else could get her as worked up as he did--and in record time too. He didn’t have a fucking clue what he was talking about but here he was, spouting off his unwarranted and nonfactual opinion. And as much as she didn’t want to argue about it, there was still something she couldn’t let go.

“I told you, it’s Gogo now.”

The condescending chuckle behind her made her want to shove her pencil through the notebook. Or his face. “Are you still going by that? C’mon, don’t you think you’ve outgrown it? I mean, ‘Go-go’,” he repeated in a mocking tone, “Sounds a bit ridiculous in’nit?”

“Just as ridiculous as ‘Kris-to-fer Dun-nuh’,” she repeated back in just as mocking a tone. His silence was enough to tell her that she’d managed to get under his skin as well. He sighed deeply, running a hand through his greying hair.

“Are we really going to do this again this year? Really?”

“What thing is that,” Shed asked, deadpan.

“The thing where you treat me like absolute shite and I’m supposed to just laugh it off like ‘Hoho, that’s my girl!’ because you report even the slightest hint of discipline as abuse?”

Gogo couldn’t help but give a ghost of a smirk at that. “No, yeah that sounds about right.”

“Fuckin’ hell--” He muttered angrily to himself. She could hear him start to pace around behind her. “You know, I’m actually fucking trying here.”

She inhaled sharply through her nose, practically scratching her pencil and nearly ripping the paper. “Are you? Because you came in here and degraded my drawings before immediately changing the subject to something that only you care about, pretended to have a clue what goes on with me at school, and made fun of my fucking name!”

“Well what the hell do you want me to say!? I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about half the time!”

“You never even tried to learn! All you’ve ever done is try to get me interested in the things that you like, you have never once tried to relate to any of my interests or hobbies or anything that goes on with me!”

“What the fuck do you expect when all you do is sass me and treat me like fucking garbage!” There was a part of her, the teeniest, tiniest sliver that almost felt bad for him. In his eyes, he probably didn’t realize why his daughter hated him so much. He didn’t know that she knew things that she wasn’t supposed to. But those things that she knew far outweighed any semblance of pity into pure malice. “Y’know, any other parent would smack you across your smart mouth for saying half the things you do!”

“Yeah, let’s see how well that works out for you,” she growled dangerously, hunching over her work as she furiously drew. At this point, she’d all but completely decimated any decipherable measurements. Now she was just drawing angry scribbles and furiously stabbing at stick figures that resembled her father.

She thought that would be the end of it. By now, he usually gave up in a huff and that would be the last they’d speak to each other for several more days before the cycle continued. But instead, she could hear footsteps coming up behind her.

“Y’know, you should be fucking grateful for the life I’ve given you. I work hard, every day so that I can earn money to support you, despite the fact that you treat me like dirt. And I let you get away with being an ungrateful, spoiled little--”

He was interrupted by Gogo throwing her notebook and pencil on the desk in front of her and loudly slow clapping. “Oh, congratu-fucking-lations, you’ve done the bare fucking minimum by being a decent human being and taking care of the spawn that your reckless behavior made,” she drawled sarcastically, finally turning to glare at him. His face was bright red by this point and he was fuming just as much as she was.

“Hey, I didn’t have to come back to support you or your mother! But I did because, despite what you seem to think, I actually do give a shit about you!” He yelled at her, aggressively. Yeah, some way to show love and care.

“Do you? Or did you do it because you’re trying to convince yourself that you aren’t a shitty, terrible human being?” His eyes widened and he straightened at that, looking almost like she’d slapped him. With the verbal upper hand, she continued. “’Cuz yeah, I tried to do that once too. But shocker, you’re terrible and I’m your terrible fucking child that you brought in the world. Guess you’ve got to deal with the fucking consequences!”

He stood there in a stunned silence. She glared at him before spinning back towards her work, drawing it close to her body again. Surely this time he would take the hint and piss off. But no, much to her chagrin, he started speaking again.

“Wha-- What the fuck is wrong with you? Who says this kind of stuff?!”

“Me, apparently,” she replied dryly, the anger draining from her voice. The anger was always quick, and then it would subside, replaced by emptiness. No, she’d replace it with something else. With racing thoughts, or invention ideas, or anything else. She turned to a new page and began to lightly sketch, trying to fill the void. But her father wouldn’t let it go that easily.

“What, you can’t even be grateful that you’re fucking alive? That’s how much you want to spite me?!” He demanded. She could practically feel the heat radiating off of him. She scowled, every muscle in her body tense and itching to explode. But she ignored him, remaining silent as she continued to sketch. He stood there, waiting for an answer. One that she refused to give. Finally, fists and jaws clenched, he took a step back and shook his head.

“Bloody hell, if that’s the case, then you might as well fucking kill yourself, eh?” He huffed. It was supposed to be sarcastic. It was supposed to be a joke, the same kind of dark, destructive and hurtful humor that she’d been throwing at him for years now. But those words, strung into that exact sentence, in that exact tone, seemed to set something off in her. She didn’t mean to say it, but the words slipped out of her mouth.

“God, I can only hope someday!” They both stopped in that moment. She sat there, frozen, feeling his eyes boring into the back of her head--searching her, trying to figure out what truth hid under a mountain of sarcasm and cynicism. But after a moment, he scoffed.

“Can you not be sarcastic for like, a minute in your fucking life?” Gogo had to keep herself from giving any visceral signs of relief that he wasn’t going to push her on this. That like everything else, this was clearly just another one of her facetious statements.

“Maybe someday,” she retorted with a hollow tone. His glare worsened but he shook his head, seemingly finally giving in.

“I don’t fucking get it with you. No, you know what? I do. You were upset about the separation and you’re upset that you have to come live with me in the countryside instead of being in London with your mother. I get how that can be annoying. I get that you’re a teenager, and it’s ~fun and edgy~ to rip your parents a new one. But y’know, someday you are going to realize and appreciate just how hard I work to provide a roof over your head, food on the table, and money for your education. I don’t even ask for you to thank me for that, it’s all coming to you and your mother in the form of child support. All I do is give and let you verbally beat me down and do whatever the fuck you want. Maybe you don’t realize just how fucking lucky you have it, but you will someday.” With that, she heard him turn and start to walk back towards the main house.

And normally, she would leave it at that. She’d be grateful that he was backing off and leaving her the fuck alone to do what she wanted. But there was something about the condescension in his tone and how she knew that it was all bullshit that seemed to trigger something in her. She didn’t mean for it to come out, but just as he always did, he managed to bring the worst out of her.

“Forgive me for not pitying your hard work, but I’m sure you’re plenty fine if you can own two houses,” she said, her voice dripping in acid. As she turned to him, she caught a glimpse of him absolutely freezing in his place. When he turned back to her, his eyes were wide in a way that she’d never seen before.

“Excuse me?” 

“You heard me, Mr. Shwartz,” she spat the name that had sat on her tongue for so many years. For so long, she’d imagined his reaction for when she finally revealed her knowledge to him. Much like her fantasies, all the color drained from his face, and his whole body tensed. His mouth even fell open. But instead of feeling empowered and rectified, she only felt seething rage and pain boiling in her gut.

“Wh-- I-- Ho-- What the fuck--” He started to stammer. She wanted to feel triumphant but instead, she just cut him off.

“What, you really didn’t think I knew?” She hawed skeptically. The utter bewilderment on his face was enough of an answer. But she gave a few of her own, scoffing. “I looked around the school. No signs of a ~star Slytherin quidditch player~ named Christopher Dunne, but there sure as hell was a Christopher Schwartz. Not to mention the fact that all the letters you get while we’re here are mailed to a different address. Combined with the fact that you’ve never introduced me to any family members and this place doesn’t look like it’s touched except when I’m here...it’s not fucking rocket science.”

Her father just stared at her. It was almost hard to read his expression. There was confusion, anger, shock, but also hints of something else that she couldn’t quite put her finger on. In between a clenched jaw, through gritted teeth, he finally demanded. “How long?”

Gogo scoffed again, folding her arms and leaning back in the chair. “Years now,” she rebutted simply. The color seemed to come back into his face, a deep red flush rising.

“And why the hell did you wait until now to say something?!” The more he spoke, the more loud and unraveled he seemed to become. Gogo seemed to do the same.

“Because, up until now I’ve needed your fucking money to survive!” She shot back, verbally throwing him off guard. He blinked and looked to her with that stupid fucking bewilderment again. She sighed sharply. “Child support, dumbass.”

The insult seemed to kick him right back into his fury as he squared his shoulders. “What-- you think if you told me earlier I wouldn’t pay child support?!”

“Uh, yeah?”

“Merlin, Leiko, I would never do that! I’m not the fucking monster that you think I am!” He screamed, a vein now pulsing in his neck.

“Could’ve fooled me with all the fucking court cases in my life! And I told you, it’s Gogo!”

“It’s stupid!” He roared, violently swinging his arm out. It wasn’t anywhere close to her, clearly just a way to blow off some steam, but she felt her muscles instinctively tighten. “Any disputes in child support were because your mother wasn’t spending the money on you! Wasting the money on her leech parents--”

Something seemed to snap in Gogo and she slammed her hand on the table, going to stand. “Don’t you dare even put their names in your mouth! ‘I’m not a fucking monster’, look at you! You can’t just knock someone up and then try to drop everything except your shitty seed!” 

“I tried to make things work with your mother! But she was too--”

“Too what?” Gogo started, pushing herself off of the desk and towards her father. The man twitching with violent aggression. “Too muggle?”

“Wha-- No!” He shouted. Gogo caught a glimpse of his fist tightening, the muscles in his arm tensing.

‘Do it. Hit me.’

She gave him a sickening smile as she drew closer. “Too or-i-en-tal?” She emphasized each syllable with a hideous broken English accent.

“No!” His face was bright red by now and his body was trembling.

‘Do it old man. See what fucking happens.’

“That’s why you have the fake name, right? And the second house? Why your family is “estranged”? Because we’re the estranged family not good enough for your hoity-toity, stuck-up, inbred, garbage pureblood family! But guess what, Kris-to-fer Schwartz, you aren’t as fucking smart as you think you are! In fact, I’d say you’re a right fucking dumbass! You go out, shoot your load without protection like a fucking moron and then spend the rest of your life floundering about trying to deal with your mistake so you don’t have to face the reality that--Oh that’s right! You’re a terrible fucking human being who’s too much of a ballsack coward to commit to either being a fucking father or being--whatever the fuck a Schwartz is! But that’s you! That’s who you are! And nothing is ever going to change that!”

By the time she was done ranting, she was standing in front of the seething man. With every sharp inhale, every pulse of the vein, she waited for anything. A twitch--any movement to indicate a violent reaction. In her eyes it was a win-win-win either way. Either she would have an excuse to beat the ever-loving crap out of him or he’d somehow get the upper hand and she’d get him thrown in jail. Or the third option was that he’d go completely fucking nuts and just murder her but again--win-win-win.

He inhaled sharply through his nose and she braced herself. With his exhale, he spoke sharply through bare, gritted teeth. “You-- have NO fucking idea what you’re talking about!”

And then a crack echoed throughout the room. Gogo acted on instinct, bringing her arms up to block herself, just like countless sparring matches had taught her. But nothing made impact. In fact, when she lowered her arms, she saw that the garage was now empty.

He’d disappeared. No, more actually, he disapparated.

He was running away.

Just like he did with everything fucking ELSE!

The thought roared in Gogo’s mind as she spun around, harshly kicking the chair across the room. It clattered against the far wall and fell over, but Gogo didn’t dare stop moving. She couldn’t. She grabbed her notebook and raced up to her room, grabbing her bag and hapharzardly throwing in whatever was in her reach. Clothes, toiletries, her wand, various tools and supplies that she’d transfigured into much safer, travel-friendly form. Then she practically flew to the kitchen where she raided the place for food that wouldn’t expire--taking her father’s favorite snacks just to spite him. Then when all was said and done, she returned to the garage and grabbed her favorite form of transportation that she so rarely got to use at school--her bicycle. It was one of the first one she’d ever made magical modifications on, with tires that could change their tread depending on the terrain. All but slamming the button to open the door, she mounted the cycle and peddled off into the night as fast as possible.

Sure, it probably would have been much easier to apparate to the portkey that would take her from Ireland back to London. But for once in her life, she wasn’t going to take the fastest route possible. She was going to peddle, and push, and force out every horrible toxic thing out of her body until she was nothing but an empty, exhausted shell.

Besides, she could afford to take the time. Because now she had the summer all to herself.