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cantsayidont · 9 months

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Recentish movies of note, or not:

BOTTOMS: Ridiculous "teen" comedy about two gay high school losers, PJ (Rachel Sennott, who also co-wrote with director Emma Seligman) and Josie (Ayo Edebiri), who seize on a rumor about their having been in juvenile detention to start an after-school "self-defense club," in the hope that introducing the school's hottest cheerleaders to the cathartic thrill of girls beating the shit out of each other will finally give these hopeless (and ho-less) virgins a chance to score. So silly that complaining about the stupidity of the plot seems a tad churlish, but the story misses some obvious comedic opportunities, and despite the premise, the film eventually becomes far more interested in cartoonish violence than sex. If you dig the overall vibe, you might not care, but as a gay teen sex comedy, it's ultimately less successful (and less outrageous) than BOOKSMART, even though only one of the latter film's teen loser heroines is gay.

DO REVENGE: Black comedy homage to the teen comedies of the '90s and early '00s, inspired in part by the 1951 movie version of STRANGERS ON A TRAIN, about a disgraced prep school popular girl, Drea (Camila Mendes), who joins forces with gay weirdo Eleanor (Maya Hawke) to avenge herself on her former friends and find out who leaked her sex tape — a plan that involves giving Eleanor a makeover so she can infiltrate the popular kids. Hawke is a delight, Mendes is very good, and the homoerotic tension of their odd relationship makes the movie fun for a while, especially if you appreciate the many self-conscious homages to prior teen movies. However, a major reveal late in the second act makes hash of the already sloppy plot, and the finale is both nonsensical and as antisemitic as STRANGERS ON A TRAIN author Patricia Highsmith, which leaves a sour aftertaste.

IT'S A WONDERFUL KNIFE: Bizarre slasher movie pastiche of IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE, about a teenage girl named Winnie Carruthers (Jane Widdop of YELLOWJACKETS), who kills the masked serial killer who's been terrorizing the small town of Angel Falls and murdered her best friend (Hana Huggins) at Christmastime. A year later, everyone in town seems to have gotten over it except Winnie, who's miserable. On Christmas Eve, she's magically transported into an alternate timeline where she was never born and the masked slasher has continued murdering people, including Winnie's brother (Aiden Howard). To set things right, Winnie has to stop the villain all over again with the help of Bernie Simon (Jess McLeod), the town outcast and the only one who believes her story. Not scary, gruesome, or suspenseful enough to be much of a horror movie, but there are enough grisly murders to make the comedic holiday fantasy aspects seem a trifle sociopathic, and a late reveal that the killer has supernatural powers beyond just stabbing or slashing people feels like one ingredient too many in an already convoluted plot. The main redeeming feature is that it's ultimately a gay love story, which I wasn't expecting, but appreciated nonetheless.

THE KILL ROOM: Uma Thurman, Samuel L. Jackson, Joe Manganiello, and Maya Hawke go slumming in this dumb black comedy about a handsome hitman named Reggie (Manganiello) who becomes the sensation of the art world after his mob intermediary (Jackson) concocts a scheme to launder Reggie's payments by selling his abstract paintings (under the nom de plume "the Bagman") through a burned-out, Adderall-snorting art dealer (Thurman). Intended satire of the cutthroat vacuity of the art world lacks bite and no part of the plot makes any sense, but sheer star power gets the movie through about half its 80-minute running time before the banality becomes terminal.

POLITE SOCIETY: Silly British action-comedy by Nida Manzoor (creator of WE ARE LADY PARTS) about Ria Khan (Priya Kansara, delightful), a Pakistani teenager who aspires to be a stuntwoman, and her quest to save her flaky art student older sister Lena (Ritu Arya, radiant) from marrying a handsome doctor (Ashay Khanna) who seems a little too good to be true. It looks great, and the characters are very charming, but the story waits much too long to clarify the stakes of the plot: Until the finale, we don't know if Lena is actually in any danger or if Ria is just letting her imagination run away with her, and that uncertainty becomes an unwelcome distraction in the later action sequences. As a result, it feels more like an update of the John Hughes perennial SIXTEEN CANDLES than the over-the-top action movie it obviously aspires to be.

SHIVA BABY: Low-key but vivid comedy of manners, written and directed by Emma Seligman, starring Rachel Sennott as Danielle, a bisexual 20something Jewish girl who secretly pays her bills as a sugar baby. When she goes with her parents (Fred Melamed and Polly Draper) to a shiva, she finds herself trapped with not only her most annoying relatives, but also her disgruntled ex-girlfriend (Molly Gordon), her current sugar daddy (Danny Deferrari), his gorgeous blond wife (Dianna Agron), and their new baby. Seligman milks every awkward nuance of this uncomfortable social situation for maximum dramatic effect, and the tension of the final scene (which is nothing more complicated than the characters trying to squeeze into the back of Danielle's father's minivan) will drive you right up the wall.

VOLEUSES (WINGWOMEN): Is it really possible for a 40-year-old Frenchwoman living in the 21st century to not know that lesbians exist? One wouldn't think so, but watching this jokey buddy-action movie suggests that director/co-writer/star Mélanie Laurent desperately needs some kind of educational intervention in that regard. This is for all intents and purposes a lesbian romance: Master thieves Carole (Laurent) and Alex (Adèle Exarchopoulos) live together, routinely sleep in the same bed, and plan to retire together; they constantly express their love and affection for one another, and when Carole discovers that she's pregnant (the hows of which are never explained), Alex immediately assumes that they'll be moms together. Nonetheless, the story not only attempts to no-homo this cozy domestic scenario, but also presumes that there's no way Carole and Alex's relationship could ever be the de facto marriage it obviously already is — indeed, a crucial story moment involves Carole tearfully wishing she were a man so she could love Alex the way she deserves! If the movie had been made 50+ years ago, this might be poignant, but in 2023, it's just weird, and the resulting cognitive dissonance largely overshadows the thin plot, which concerns Carole and Alex trying to persuade their bitchy, cheerfully murderous employer Marraine (Isabelle Adjani, barely recognizable beneath her big hair and oversized sunglasses) to let them retire, while training a younger woman named Sam (Manon Bresch) to become their driver and the ambiguously defined third in their domestic ménage à trois.

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shiroikabocha · 6 months

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favorite part of talos principle??????

I procrastinated forever on this ask, sorry. The answer’s kinda sad. But it’s also, like, deeply true and important to me as a person, so.

My mom died at the end of 2013, concluding a truly impressive any% cancer speedrun. Less than 90 days from first symptoms to last. I loved her a lot. It was a bad time.

2014 was the worst year of my life. I became convinced that human consciousness (or at least, my own human consciousness) was not an inherent good. Not an inherent bad, either, just… the nature of the human brain is to want to continue existing, and to be incapable of continuing to exist. It’s not a system that’s designed to function without pain. It’s not a system that’s designed. Consciousness hurts. Being a conscious, physical creature in an unpredictable physical world that has no obligation to make coherent narrative sense hurts.

(I miss my mom. It’s a problem with no solution.)

And then there was this video game. And it had this guy (gender neutral) in it. And this guy was like: you’re so right, bestie. Making sense of existence? That’s a loser’s game. Can’t even get to I think, therefore I am without coming up against some truly gnarly logical conundrums—almost enough to make you wanna invent a big invisible sky-friend who gives you all the answers and reassures you that you’re important and good, right? But that’s stupid. You don’t want to be stupid, do you? You want to be smart. Like me. Smart means you’re better than the people who need happy little answers to all their silly little questions. You don’t need them. You don’t need anybody. That’s the great thing about nothing—it’s so beautifully consistent! When nothing means anything, there are no contradictions. Trying to understand your place in the cosmos—asking the question “I exist; what should I do with that fact?�� and expecting to arrive at an actual, functional answer—is a sucker’s game. The only winning move is not to play.

I can’t really explain what it felt like to see my own feelings repeated back to me so clearly, so accurately, and at such length—and for my reaction to my own worldview to be seething fucking hatred. When I started playing The Talos Principle, I was a pessimistic nihilist. I did not perceive myself changing into something different until I was screaming at my keyboard FUCK YOU, my existence has meaning because I CHOOSE to imbue it with meaning and I do not FUCKING CARE if it doesn’t make sense, some things are more important than being flawlessly logically correct and ME HAVING A REASON TO LIVE is ONE OF THEM

(when your internal logic answer to Why should I stay alive? starts out as My life is a precious gift given to me by God and it is not mine to throw away, and then your understanding of the world changes in a way that no longer incorporates an ontologically-existent God, sometimes you wind up with: Why should I stay alive? Answer: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ And that answer really only works as long as nothing terrible happens. It does not hold up well under stress. When you take god away you do have to put something else in its place, and it’s not easy to find something else that can hold up under the weight.)

Like… it would be an oversimplification to say that The Talos Principle made me want to live again. But it wouldn’t be too much of an oversimplification to say TTP forced me to acknowledge that I didn’t currently have a good reason to want to live, and that felt bad, and I owed it to myself to fix it. And that if I could hate this fucking asshole librarian so so much (because he was me), and still feel so much compassion for him by the end of the game, then maybe I could figure out how to feel compassion for myself, too.

Also I really like the puzzles where the solution is to zwoop around all over the place with fans, those are my favorite

#the talos principle #milton library assistant #this is part of the reason I took an extended break from TTP2 #it was bringing up complicated feelings #that are probably worth exploring! but are difficult nonetheless #it’s not the fault of the game that it’s inextricably tied up with how I learned to survive my mother’s death #but that’s what the game means for me and when TTP2 started talking more explicitly about death #it got a little heavier than I was ready to deal with #I will return to it for sure #but not right now #I’m not emotionally ready #(ugh that sounds so fucking weird but it’s also true)

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beevean · 9 months

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Man its just that the average nfcv fan vision of the belmonts is a human centipede. You grab the og belmonts, you kno the good hearted almost superhuman warriors who fought and killed Dracula time and time again, let nfcv turn them into regular vampire hunters that are framed as morally gray bc "muh poor vampires :(", and who are cynical jerks that don't do much of anything. And then you let the fandom bully them into the ground bc haha loser men and muh girlbosses.

And its kinda weird bc its also often making fun of them due to their traumas? Like yea maybe alcoholism due to losing your entire family at a young age isnt a joke you know. Or seeing your mother get killed in front of you as a child. Yes ofc you can make fun of dark stuff i'd be lynched as a hypocrite if i said you cant, but the way its done and how continuous it is... irrespectful? Like they dont respect the serious aspects of the character and legit think they suck for having horrible things happen to them? Im bad at gauging jokes like that but... yea (they just dont know how to bully fictional characters unlike us who throw Isaac off a 10 stories building everyday <3)

In any case, N! Trevor and N! Richter do not deserve that sort of treatment already, and much less their mainline counterparts :/

And regarding girlbosses, they way ppl need to put down their men to show how cool the girls are just, reeks of insecurity to me? Why does having a "loser dumb wife guy" makes her a girlboss? Why would a confident gal need a loser to take care of instead of a good partner were both compliment eachother's strong and weak points? Maybe im being a bit dramatic here, but it carries off a similar mentality to sexist guys that need to put down their gal's accomplishments to feel well Plus, the way how fandoms still revolve around said loser guys and how a lot of the times the writing itself makes the girlboss character a compliment or a motivation for the man without depth for herself makes it all feel performative. Just write a normal character with character traits who happens to be a woman ffs :/

It's incredible. NFCV alone feels like a shitty fanfiction, full of those fanfic tropes that would make me close immediately: flanderization, wimpification of "pretty" male characters, thirsting, juvenile wit, spotlight-stealing OCs, gratuituous sex and SA treated with the finesse of a charging hippo. Then you let the fandom fandomify this shitty fanfic even more, and the result is just a disaster, a kiddie pool of the most baffling misconceptions you could see.

Just to make one example, Trevor in the games is a noble but ruthless hunter, both friendly and fierce, fighting for mankind yet wanting respect yet gladly giving credit to his friends; in the show, he's a washed out Bojack Horseman-esque asshole, who despite his cynicism admittedly attempts to do the right thing when push comes to shove; and according to fandom he's pretty much a funny penis man with two braincells, Sypha and Alucard. the scene where he punches Dracula and he goes "you must be the Belmont" became a meme for a reason :^)

And yeah you're right that the fandom doesn't seem to. like the Belmonts much. But then again, they're acting like the show wants them to :) The writing doesn't take Trevor's alcoholism seriously, so they don't, alcoholism is a funny joke that makes people silly and just a tad pathetic (and it's not a serious addiction and symptom of larger problems no sir). Richter is a goofball who cries in a corny way, so it's easy to laugh at him - and that's when fans don't say that Julia deserved to die for being a "colonizer". Lenore is sexualized to hell and back, so the fans thirst for her and they think that Hector must thirst for her too, and look, wasn't her death so prettly tragic, maybe she was a good person after all!

The way fandoms treat girl characters nowadays is... barely an improvement over the 2000s when Amy would be called a slut for having a backless dress. Now it's all about how stronk and kewl and queens and girlbosses they are. And you can't criticize the writing of a female character because "just say you hate women 🙄", even when the said character is a female victim of abuse who was written by a molester as a smug radfem whose personality never goes beyond "i want to steal from men because men bad" *coughcoughcough*

The show itself is regressive when it comes to its female characters. They're all the damn same. They're either spunky sassy gals who put their men in their place, or evil but hot dommy mommies (Striga and Morana don't fit the mold because they're not characters). Most of them are magic users, even those who in the games were normal women. I will forever stand by my point that Annette did not need to be a metal bender, and if the writers truly cared, they could have fleshed out the skeleton provided by RoB. But they didn't. Because girl power!!! but only if you're conventionally "badass" and have a "strong" attitude.

#anti netflixvania #see i can gush about isaac and his hidden depths *and* yeet him to the ceiling and watch him fall to the ground at the same time #that's what makes bullying funny <3

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dykexenomorph · 2 months

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Bela Re8, Karlach Bg3, and\or Isobel Bg3 for the ask game!

not upset just wanna complete the set 👍

this got kinda long so im putting it under a readmore LMAO (character asks!!)

BELA DIMITRESCU:

HOW I FEEL ABOUT HER: HOW can i put this. she is everything to me. i think about her daily.shes my right hand arm. MAN. shes my everything. all of this but she doesn't even make the top ten in my list of favorite resi charas LMAO

WHO DO I SHIP WITH HER: well nobody. sorry for being lame it will happen again LMAO

NON ROMANTIC OTPS FOR HER: IM SORRY IM SO LAME I JUST LIKE HER FAMILY DYNAMIC. BELA HAS NO FRIENDS SHES A LOSER WHAT DO U WANT FROM ME MAN

UNPOP OPINION ABOUT HER: i dunno how to put it but i think the way i generally see/interpret her (and the other two sisters) are so blatantly different from what fanon is (or at least what it was BEFORE i gave up on the re8 tag) tht its my most unpop opinion? if tht makes sense idk its late and im tired

SMTH I WISH HAPPENED IN CANON: I SO BADLY WANT MORE CONTEXT FOR THE WAY THE DIMITRESCU'S OPERATED AND TREATED ONE ANOTHER. like YEAH they were killing maids and being generally dykeish and cruel in that castle but how were they sustaining this. what like. day to day things did they do. were the sisters close or did they just see each other as competition or what!!! im so curious about them it hurts AUGH

KARLACH CLIFFGATE:

HOW I FEEL ABOUT HER: AUGAUGATGALHGALJSFSDLAJ !!! hope this helps :D

WHO DO I SHIP WITH HER: my DURGE!!!!!!!!!!! (real answer though is probably minthara or shadowheart. i love the idea of minthara ALSO going back to avernus w karlach and wyll to help her fix her engine :3)

NON ROMANTIC OTPS FOR HER: WYLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they have THE dynamic of all time <3

UNPOP OPINION ABOUT HER: the way people baby her is SO stupid and ridiculous. this is a woman who fought in a demon army for TEN YEARS. she saw what happened when elturel fell and did nothing because she was worried about what it'd mean for herself. YES she is a kind, giving, and heroic person NOW, but she hasn't always been (even if her reasoning is understandable). if i see one more person act like she can't understand or cope with some of the more morally questionable things the party encounters along the campaign im going to lose my mind

SMTH I WISH HAPPENED IN CANON: dunno if this counts but i wish we could do more in terms of touching her (for lack of better way to phrase it) in act 1. like let me be silly and use mage hand to high five (or whatever else) her. let me and wyll dump cold beer in her mouth like some sort of shitty frat party. idk its very silly but i want more goofy interactions w her where tav + the party try to find stupid ways around the engine issue!!!!!

ISOBEL THORM:

HOW I FEEL ABOUT HER: NOBODY LOVES HER MORE THAN I DO AND I MEAN THAT SO GENUINELY. ISOBEL THORM THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHO DO I SHIP WITH HER: im not answering this. come on now. lets get a grip. (aside from the obvious answer i also like her + dame alyin + shart. tht trio is everything to me <3)

NON ROMANTIC OTPS FOR HER: does jaheira count? they were stuck for SUCH a long time protecting last light together in the shadow curse, they had to have ended up being good friends i think?? i think about it ALL the time

UNPOP OPINION ABOUT HER: its hard to have an unpop opinion when nobody thinks about her character as anything other than an accessory for dame alyin. i will give u an unpop opinion when u can give me literally ANY non-alyin related opinion this fandom has about her LMAO

SMTH I WISH HAPPENED IN CANON: GIVE ME MORE SOLO ISOBEL INTERACTIONS PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I WANT COMPANION ISOBEL. I WANT AN ISOBEL-CENTRIC QUEST (NO ACT 2 DOESNT COUNT LEAVE ME BE). WHY DO I ALWAYS LOVE CHARACTERS W THE LEAST AMOUNT OF CONTENT

#asks #THANK U FOR ASKING ABOUT IS/BEL I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ON HER AND NEVER GET TO TALK ABOUT HER #guy whos favorite characters are ppl with negative amounts of content: hey why does nobody ever ask me about this chara?#queue are my lucky star #(did not even remotely proof read this cuz im tired and lazy. sorry if its unreadable LOL)

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judasgot-it · 1 year

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this isn’t exactly a request but if you have the time and also feel like doing it could you just- idk, say everything that u like about Tetcho?? Just anything and everything that comes to your mind whether it be about the way he’s written by Asagiri, or anything really lol because I have a feeling you really like him

I want to save this for Wednesday but if anything major changes (probably will. Everyday I thank bones for making him their fave) ill add more cause AHGGGHGGHG this man....

Not enough Tecchou lovers out there. Asagari hasn't said anything on his backstory and I'm waiting for it so for now I'm making shit up (all I know is that IRL Tecchou was from a rich samurai family so how that ads to his character? Idk. Im sticking with child soldier tho for now one day ill write a fic)

BUT AHHHHHHHHHH OMG listen with what we DO have he's a good character. He clearly cares for his teammates, he's the person who cares about Jouno even when Fukuchi never believed in him being a good person (thats actually upsetting af but Tecchou is a real one for seeing Jouno for who he is)

HE LOVES ANTS AND RESPECTS LUCY BECAUSE SHE CARES ABOUT HER FRIENDS EVEN THOUGH HE GENIUENLY THOUGHT THAT THEY WERE TERRORISTS AT THE TIME !!! HES A GOOD MAN !!!

He would put those he loves above justice, the thing he put his life on the line for its crazy !!! He plays the hero, but at the end of the day, his friends and family mean more, and that's wild cause that goes against his entire thing !!!

Literally, even though he hasn't been in the series long for what we do have so far, I can't help but like him, idk what it is about him but he's a likable character for me

Sometimes I like to think about him and cry like the loser I am. Anyway.

Since this is my soap box moment for talking about Tecchou and all my thoughts I need to add a theory here - he quite possibly is a foil for Fukuchi

Fukuchi was in the war and saw soldiers die for one another in horrific ways that no one should see - it changed him. He told Fukuzawa that he never wanted to see that horror again.

But Tecchou is clearly thay same soldier again, what he WANTED to prevent from happening, who is willing to die for his comrades in war no matter what

LIKE FUKUCHI MADE A WHOLE ASS FAMILY WITH THE HUNTING DOGS AND THEN DESTROYED IT IN THE SAME WAY HE WAS TRAUMATIZED BY. LIKE WTF

But unlike Fukuchi, I don't think Tecchou would become a monster. He still has some semblance of humanity. He can remove himself from his sense of 'justice' and care about those around him.

It's a ramble but I like to think there's a Tecchou v Fukuchi fight coming up eventually and Tecchou would win. CAUSE ITS SO NOT FAIR THAT HE KILLED HIS COMRADES TURNED THEM INTO VAMPIRES AND THEN GETS AWAY WITH IT CAUSE OF A TIME SWORD LIKE WHAT

Anyway that is another ramble but I love him, he and Jouno are among my favs cuz they're so silly and I think have some deeper character development that might be explored later in the series. I'm praying and hoping every chapter that they come back.

Pleaaaasssseeeeeeeeeee asagari LIKE IM BEGGING YOU I HAVE FAITH IN THEM

Anyway I'll possibly add on later but anon ily I'm giving you many air kisses mwah

My last thoughts on Tecchou. Why isn't he real bro

Also omg I could write a full length novel on him cause this man must be immaculate. Idc if he isn't real I'm gonna make shit up about him. I'm delulu craycray a freak a weirdo !!

#this isnt anything x reade #still tagging it tho !!#god thank you anon #I LOVE HIM !!! HES MY FAV CHARACYER #hes so much fun to write cause he just is a good guy like in canon !!#yea he did fight a 14 year old but #i can forgive him...#anyway #bsd x reader #tecchou x reader #bsd tecchou #bsd tetchou #tetcho headcannons #i have brainrot #and i know this shit will be shown in court

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winteravian · 9 months

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well, about time I do an introduction post.

INTRODUCTION

hi!! I'm winteravian, simply known as Bird.

welcome to my blog! if you're looking for a loser who constantly hyperfixiates on stupid media that don't need the overly deep significance I give them, then you found the right place.

enjoy your stay! or don't, I won't judge you

GENERAL INFORMATION

technically I have a carrd for this, so : https://winteravian.carrd.co/

note: in this carrd there are my main info, interests and boundaries/dni. I'm still going to list them here more apprehensively since the carrd is a little old and decrepit

pronouns: she/her

sexuality: currently questioning!

age: 16

nationality: italian (forgive any mistakes in English!!)

religion: catholic christian (even if some of my ideals may or may not coincide with what the church has become in this decade...)

what I intend to use this blog for: art!! I am both a digital and traditional artist, though I have still a lot to learn. art is a forever ongoing process, and I believe sharing it can improve many things.

MY BOUNDARIES AND DNI

got this in bold ass letters bc its important.

BOUNDARIES: first and foremost, do not repost my art or claim it as yours. If it comes to my knowledge that you've reposted my art, you will be blocked and reported.

i am not comfortable with DMs unless i know you irl or we are good friends/had a substantial conversiation over some time. If you send me a message request and i don't reply, do not spam me to reply. it's annoying. (this has happened before on other socials)

if i do anyting wrong (in art or in dialogue), please do tell! i am still in a stage of learning and will happily take constructive critcism. this does not include plain pettyness and insults. remain civil, please.

do not ask me for free art. i will not do it. unless i open commissions/asks/specific post for art requests in the future, any art request is closed.

DO NOT FOLLOW ME IF: -you mock ANY religion in any way (christianity, islam, hinduism, bhuddism etc..)

-you support incest, pedophilia, homophobia, zoophilia, s*xual harrassment etc.

-just if you are a creep in general. if any of the info i gather from your profile fit these criteria and others i havent mentioned (but they are essentially common sense) you will be blocked or muted.

WHAT FANDOMS AM I IN? WHAT ARE MY INTERESTS?

boy, there'd be too many to write!! but, to make it simpler for you, I'll drop my most active fandoms:

-smg4 [hyperfix of almost six years, aka since 2019, and counting] and anything glitchprod related

-Aurora (yes the singer)

-sky: children of the light

-cookie run kingdom [sometimes]

-anything disney (I've had a period where I was obsessed with the Disney fairies franchise. I wish it still existed)

-my little pony

-trolls franchise

and many more to count !

my interests are sporadic tbh, but a consistent one is with symbolism of any kind(color, flowers, crystals, christian symbolism, pagan symbolism, stars and animals and whatever else you can think of), birds and the ocean. and silly shows and games on the internet, of course.

if I'll make a masterpost in the future it will probably be here.

also! please note that this blog is the successor of an older one, @maskedb1rd . if you want to check out my old posts go ahead! this blog is now inactive though.

thank you for reading!

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dio-the-thot-exterminator · 9 months

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reflections n stuff

Post about me trying to explain some of the projects I got going on. Hopefully, it makes sense lol.

I guess to start, most of my writing and projects are…comedic? I just want to embody tomfoolery. Some of the projects I was creating with my coauthor, I've mentioned them before. (LOL if you saw my rant that one time), (and it wasn't just once my ass can not stop mentioning it) (yes I'm mad). They basically stopped contributing so ALL the projects were put on hiatus. Yeah :/ but I refuse to let all those years of hard work sit inside a Google doc never to see the light of day again. So here we go.

TSO22 (Completed)

Hiii its me and my story. Titled semi-censored bcuz i uploaded it to YouTube and you can literally search it up and I'm not ready for that yet.

Anyways My second short film!!!! With real actors and a production team so exciting!! It's about a witch who seeks revenge on some children who wronged her! She casts a spell on a toy plushie and makes it come to life. She sends the toy to kill Fuzzy Lilypill, Large Plumjum, and Final Baddie (judging by their names you can tell this is extra goofy). Honestly one of the best things I've ever done, it was so much fun. Even though the film is hella cringe (kind of the point) it makes me laugh…like a lot and that's all that matters.

I need to tell everyone about the top-tier advertising like the way everyone pitched in to help was wild. We had lil signs and business cards and everything! The advertising was how I was able to book the actor who played Final Baddie!!

And ugh the bloopers in this film are so silly they were a lot of them bcuz nobody here has ever starred in a film before and it was a little awkward at first. But once everyone understood that this was just for fun and not really that serious we got some good content.

(Now I also need to do some complaining like I literally had to get down on my hands and knees and beg people to join. It was not fun. Why doesn't anyone want to create things anymore so sad)

The Internship (Partial)

Yes yes yes all me. This was a script that I had written for another short film! It's self-explanatory.

The Killer finds out that the internship they applied for was given to one of their classmates! This can not be! Filled with rage the killer kills that bitch and the victim's friend group because of jealousy and whatnot. Since the first pick is…well dead, the killer gets a callback and now the internship is theirs! Wow what a happy ending. I’m actually living for this script :)

I did multiple rewrites and created some google form sign-up sheets for people to join the project.

created a storyboard of the film (will search for it later).

And I started creating a custom score for it as well.

Unfortunately, no one wanted to join :( so it never came to life. That being said, once I find an animation app and learn how to animate, it's over for you hoes. And I guess this goes for all my future films lmao. (unless I actually find people to star in them praying I do tbh).

Beastly Bordello (wip)

This was a project we (me and my coauthor) started in middle school. It went through lots of rewrites like Jesus Christ. The first pass was garbage. I was crying when I reread it omg.

Anyways. How do I say this with the least amount of spoilers? There are 3 “books”, The first book draft is “complete”, we have the whole thing outlined, the first 2 chapters ready, and just need to fill out the meat of the texts a bit more.

This part of the story follows the human characters. We have the main character Debbie Smith, she is basically a bum loser 😷 and everyone hates her (it’s giving depressed!abused!timid! reader). We have Meredith Castaño who is like her cool best friend 😎 (I've drawn her with Dina. A side character who may or may not be her boo). And then we have Becky Maurice, Hanna Peters, and Lisa Blake (We call them BHL) . They are like the mean girl trio 🤬. Book 1 is meant to be a typical 2000s high school movie. Dare I say a “coming of age story” smh.

Becky is out for revenge and will stop at nothing to make Debbie's life a living hell (we are just bullying Debbie for 200+ pages).

On top of that, we discover that Debbie's homelife is not so good 😞 with her abusive parents 😭 and terminally sick sister, how will Debbie move on to the next phase of her life as she approaches high school graduation and adulthood 😱?

Omg the girls are camping! How fun! (totally not a slasher movie waiting to happen and 100% does not have a musical mid-way through).

People are dying 🪦!! Kids are going missing!?!?! Does this have anything to do with Debbie’s mysterious nightmares 🧠!? She's always had them, as she’s gotten older they’ve become more frequent, almost every day, and she even starts seeing 👀and hearing 👂 things while she's awake?

That's so scary. Oh nooooo she knows doom approaches and she is powerless to stop it :( silly silly complicit Debbie.

Like damn her life couldn't get any worse…and then BAM bitch it does!!! OMG supernatural 👹tingz and bloods🩸and crips 🔵 murder 🔪and oh shoot people are being kidnapped. Yikes.

This is book 1, Book 2 and 3 are not written yet (and honestly might not be written as I do not have my coauthor helping and it is a very ambitious project). As I said, we do have supernatural characters. The creatures. I'm pretty sure you've seen Octavia at least once? Maybe. We have our big baddies like The Lord, The Madam, The Master, The Empress, The Doctor, The Scientist, etc. Then we have our “good” creatures? They are just mf who were also kidnapped, like Alexa, Alexis, Mackenzie, Amelia etc. damn that's a lot of names that start with A.

This is reaching the spoiler zone so not sure if I should go farther. Anyway they work together to try and escape and find out where they are, why they were kidnapped and try to get home etc etc. More death and murder, staples in my work :P

This project has the most progress on it, if you go into the Beastly Bordello tag you can find some of the character designs. Not all tho because a lot of them…were meant to be drawn by the coauthor and I never got themmmmmmmm 🙄🙄.

I like really REALLY wanna continue this but gotdamn it's a lot of work and I get so discouraged easily <- lying my ass was carrying this book by myself for like 3 years.

If anything I'll design the rest of the creatures by myself. That's all I see myself doing, for now, oof.

Beastly Bordello: The Musical (Completed)

LMAOOO THIS WAS A PROJECT I HAD TO DO FOR CLASS!!!

I had to make a jukebox musical thing and I chose the wonderful Emilie Autumn. The script is short, just around 36 pages and it’s like a transition between book 2 and book 3.

It follows The Madam and she is processing the new shipment of humans she just got in.

Which would be our lovely main characters (Debbie, Meredith, BHL, etc) and we are given a little tour of the brothel (is not actually a brothel we just call it that, think of it more as a farm, a meat farm).

We meet the other characters like The Master and those lil goat mfs (main characters in the original original beastly bordello). We also get a brief introduction to our main creatures (monsters) like Mackenzie, Jia, Isla, Amelia etc (you’ve seen them before).

They then get tagged by The Doctor and The Scientist (I love those gay niggas)

And then everyone gets split up and Debbie finally meets Octavia.

What do people say? OOC? I think that means out of character? Because we have to make everything fit the song, so they just be saying stuff at one point. But shhhhhhhhhhh it's okay.

Anyway, It's just more foolishness and camp and because it's a musical it gets stupid. But I love it either way. That's what I aim for yessir, like wow something beastly bordello related that I actually completed. Wild.

Adventure to Find Jelly (wip)

Hiii another middle school project, I was working on this with my coauthor. Okok let's see how do i explain this with no spoilers. This is apart of our “sentient object” universe.

It takes place in an apartment and the family has gone away to visit relatives so now every object can come to life and do what they want.

The story follows Peanut Butter (PB) 🥜, a quiet and kind jar of peanut butter who is tired 🥱 of living the simple life. And decides to sneak out of the cabinet to go to the club (inside a closet) and that day he meets Jelly🪼(she a jar of jelly but they ain’t have the right emojis)

She is the new girl in town (the family got her from the grocery store before they left). They instantly fall in love😍 and Omg this would be like his first girlfriend, PB finally got bitches 😤.

They spend a lot of time doing couple stuff 😘 bcuz PB never got to do any of that before. Jelly is very sweet and loving 🧐 but…something is off about her…just a little 😨.

PB doesn't seem to notice nor care. But his cooler 🍆 asshole brother (who is super overprotective) tells him not to trust Jelly and leave her🙅🏿.

PB’s parents are angry 😡 and disgusted 🤮 that PB would disobey them and go to the club🕺🏿. And spend a lot of his time outside the cabinet instead of staying at home and being a good son 🤓.

PB is tired of people thinking he aint that guy 🥲 and he decided to run away 🏃🏿 to live a life with jelly.

But in a twist of events 👃, when PB arrives at Jelly’s cabinet he discovers it trashed 🗑️💢!!! And jelly is missing 😱😱😱😱😱!!

He tries to tell the police 🚔but they don't believe him, they’ve never heard of anyone called jelly 🪼 before.

PB is confused but figures out he has to do this on his own 🦸🏿‼️, he has to go on an adventure to find jelly.

It's very cheesy but like my other stories it involved murder and drama. So it's not uneventful . Hmmm we outlined 10 chapters. And started outlining the sequel book. But we never actually started writing any of it.

I’m pretty sure some of you have seen jelly before. And possibly PB because I was just given his design a couple days ago. I'm definitely going to continue making art of them, and hopefully, we’ll get Sunbutter soon. But I'm not sure about writing out the rest of the story. It's a lil problematic.

Being A Fruit (wip)

Middle school project strikes again and yes you guessed it my coauthor was involved as well. Another story taking place in our “Sentient Object” universe.

From the title you can tell this series was going to involve all the fruit characters. Bananas, strawberries, apples, etc and I think I designed a good portion of the characters too. But y'all when I say drama. I mean DRAMA. Like “how to get away with murder” type drama. This story is batshit. And it's 10x more stupid because it involves lil fruits.

I'm going to quote this for you: our strawberry character Rosette is traumatized because she “watched entire family get chopped into a fruit salad”. And then we have our villain who “loves to abduct baby fruits”.

Besides character bg we don't have any chapters drafted. But to be fair we were going to make this into a mock podcast. Like the character fruits were going to call in and tell their stories, and the radio host would have to piece together what happened. And if someone stopped calling in then they got killed oop.

Because this is like a one-off, if anything has a chance to make a comeback it's this one. Idk if anyone would want this tho besides me. Because I will go crazy in the google doc and write this myself. This story is wild.

When Two Erasers Touch

Damn did I peak at middle school? Another coauthor and me classic. This was I think the first book in our “Sentient Object” universe.

It is about lesbian erasers. Our first love story! They find each other bcuz their humans bring them to school and they chill inside a desk or something. I think we only wrote 2 chapters for this. We love a trendsetter though.

I don't think our two erasers Jika and Marei will make a comeback. But omg I am just rereading the chapters and is soo melodramatic!!! These lil erasers are going through it. Ok, I won't make any promises but…maybe we might do like a throwback chapter. Just once. Maybe. I'm not really a fan of Romance but It's so dramatic I can't even describe it.

The Hecatomb Trilogy (wip)

Finally! Something recent and does not involve my coauthor. This is one of the stories that came to me in a dream. It's hard to recall because my dumb ass didn't type or write down all the information.

I drafted the introduction and the dialogue 10/10. It's a horror movie (I say movie but it's a book bcuz everything is a movie to me). Slasher movie, of course, just a lot of carnage and ridiculous stuff. I don't have much but I have a note on the side of the google doc, that says “3 survivors bond throughout the story, connecting over their trauma and become a polycule.”

So… I have priorities lol. The first movie takes place in the neighborhood and just follows everyday people, dying you know. The second movie is meant to take place in a hospital following the survivors. And the third and final film is meant to reveal who the killer is and their backstory.

From what I have written it just says the killer is dressed in all-black leather and is super strong ;P Damn now I kinda wanna pick this back up again and put some thought into it. I see the potential ngl. We'll see. Who knows.

Adherence (wip)

All me this time. Another story that came to me in a dream. And I think everyone needs to write a gay vampire story once in their life. This one is mine. I guess it classifies as a slice of life? It's just a cute lil story about the “last” vampire adjusting to the modern world and falling in love with his would-be victim.

They do things like go to the corner store <3 and get robbed afterwards LMAOOO. The MC has to chase a naked vampire around the apartment bcuz that nigga is scared of the shower at his big age... The Vamp fucking loves modern tech and is thoroughly entertained by it. His favourite is those little toy bears that you find at like CVS and u press a button and they start dancing. The vamp meets his neighbor and she does his nails.

Just a lot of shenanigans and also of course killing. I know I keep talking about the dialogue but my god it's working my pussy out.

Damn…is this my humor? Idk why I'm surprised. Hmmmm I would want to complete some of my other projects before I start working on this. But who knows.

(SU pearl and pink diamond fanfic) wip

I don't wanna claim this. I wrote a pearl and pink diamond fanfic on wattpad back in the day. And I actually got one of my SU friends to read it. It was great. I don't remember the name tho but I wrote like 8 chapters of it and I'm proud I made it that far. Scared to actually read my old writing so I will not be searching for it. Just know it is out there.

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And so soooo much more that I don't feel like listing atm. anyways sorry for typos i am not editing this i'm tired.

Ask questions if you want to, uhhhhh you wanna make something? I'll be happy to help, yeye byee

#bobs looseleaf #not tagging anything else sorry #you know as i was typing this i just remembered the name of the SU fic #you will NOT be getting it #why am i so ambitious?#gosh why cant i just sit in stare at the wall like the good ole days

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chippedaxe · 3 years

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yessss for karl?! omg yess please pleas please can you write a dom step sis! reader ruining innocent stepbro! karl!!

like she teases him and he just isn’t experienced at all and she just fucking destroys him, wanking him until the sensitive little bunny is crying and begging to stop from overstimulation

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Title: Silly Boy

Warnings: !TW: STEPCEST!, NSFW (Minors DNI), cursing, corruption ig, blackmail, degrading, teasing, humiliation, penis degrading, small penis, overstimulation

Pronouns: She/her Afab

Synopsis: The reader dominates Karl and knocks him down a peg.

Word count: 2k

Note: If this type of content offends you in any way then please just ignore it, I have tons of other content on my page that isn't stepcest content and you're able to blockout any stepcest content by blocking the 'tw sepcest' or 'stepcest cw' tag <3

- This prolly isn't what u wanted but I thought of this and wanted to write it! also this hasn't been proofread and it hasn't been edited at all!

*Btw Veruca Salt is a spoiled kid that gets everything she wants, from Charlie and the chocolate factory.

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Your eyes glared down at the younger boy, towering over him to show dominance "S-sis, what're you doing?" Karl asked "Trying to scare you, is it working?" you leaned down and kept eye contact with the stammering boy "u-um not really.." he stuttered out "then why're you stuttering over your words? You're obviously intimidated." you placed your hands on your hips.

"Well why're you trying to intimidate me? I'm just trying to read this book!" he groaned "Because someone has to knock you down a peg, you think just because you're younger that you can get everything you want? Well not if I can help it!" you were furious by the boy.

"What're you on about? What've I done to you?" Karl asked worriedly "You've been asking for a whole lot this week, veruca salt!" you threw your arms in the air and started pacing around him and his chair "What? Like what?" Karl was utterly confused "You've been asking for non-stop rides to your friends houses, and you've been leaving your laundry around for mother to do!" you cross your arms.

"You're overreacting!" Karl complained "Oh I'm not done! You've also been taking money from mom's purse!" you called him out "What- how did you know about that??" Karl immediately became tense "Oh you look so stressed dear brother, just relax- don't worry... I'm not gonna tell her-" Karl sighed in relief "Oh thank god" and got cut off by you finishing your sentence "-If you promise to be a good brother and listen to what your stepsister says!" you finished.

"WHAT? No way! I'm telling mom and dad!" He began to stand up but you pushed him back down "Oh no no no, you're gonna tell them what? That you stole the $200 that mom presumed was stolen by a thief? You gonna explain that to her after she already called authorities and had someone sent to jail?" you spat venom at him.

"You're evil!" Karl shouted "Me? Evil? I'm not the thief here" you grinned mischievously "Although I could be- if you don't wanna have to do everything I say then just give me something precious you own" you held your hand out expectantly "What am I supposed to give you? My soul?" Karl questioned "If you can bare to part with it then yes" you gave a mean smile in response to his sarcasm.

"I have literally nothing!" Karl exclaimed "You have your phone" you suggested "Dad would kill me if he found out I'd given it away!" He shouted "he'd kill you if he found out about that money too" you reminded him "I- I could give you... I'll let you date one of my friends!" Karl smiled nervously as he hoped you'd agree "What friends? You're a nerd, no one would want to be friends with you" snickered.

"S-Sapnap! He's strong, he loves animals, he has big muscles!" Karl said "The brute with dark hair? He's cute but not my type" you yawned "U-m.. Quackity?" a bead of sweat dropped down his face "He's super cool, really funny!" Karl was starting to worry as he was already running out of friends to pair you with "No.. My type is nerdy boys that I can dominate, ones that get nervous a lot and stutter over their sentences" you hinted.

"Oh- like Wilbur? I'm not really his friend but I can try something!!" Karl wasn't getting the hint "No, I was thinking more specifically towards someone like you." you finally told him "M-me? But I'm your brother!" Karl was in disbelief "Step-brother. And I don't really like you, I just think that you're pitiful and if you're gonna be selling someone's body to me in exchange to keep your secrets safe than it may as well be yours." you explained.

"But- Well- I've never done that before!" he put his hands up defensively "Well obviously, who would want to touch a greasy nerd like you?" you sighed. "Well- No, that's wrong!" he shook his head "Well I'm not gonna make you, just give me something else then and I'll be on my way" you told him. Karl looked down at his feet for a moment as he mulled over what was happening and what decision he was gonna make.

Karl lifted his head and made eye contact with you "Okay." he replied "Okay what? Okay you're gonna give me something?" you asked "No- I mean- okay I'm gonna give you my body" he mumbled quietly "Gonna need to speak up, can't hear you over the sound of our parents crying over having such a disappointing child" you ridiculed him.

"I'll give you my body, damnit!" he yelled "hey- quiet down, our parents are only just down stairs!" you made him shut up. "Whatever" he leaned back in his chair and slumped down "Karl. You need to give me your full consent, you can't just go 'yea whatever' and expect me to be fine with that!" you furrowed your eyebrows "Why?? What- do you need me to beg you for it?!" he was getting aggravated.

"Actually yes, I do" you decided to torment him a little bit "Big sis, please please please fuck this desperate loser" he put his hands together to make a praying gesture as he mocked you "That's more like it, runt." you grabbed his chin and forced him to face you "We can stop at any time, if you choose not to speak up then that'll be your fault" you made sure he was fully aware that he had a say even though he wasn't in control.

"Thanks. Now- how do we?" Karl was now confused on what you were gonna do, and he was having some type of delusion that he was gonna be the one in charge dominating you. "I think I'm just gonna have some fun by jerking you off, is that okay bunny?" you teased "W-what do you mean you're gonna jerk me off?" Karl asked nervously "I'm gonna stroke your dick, never done that before?" you bullied him.

"N-no, never even thought about it.." his face became red and flushed, you slowly slid onto his lap and straddled his leg "No? You haven't? Are you lying to your big sister? That's not very nice you know, Mom always told me that you shouldn't lie (Unless it's to your dad) " Karl glanced away from you and tried to hide his face "Aw you can tell me the truth, I'm a good listener after all!" you encouraged him "I haven't.." he persisted.

"Well then let me introduce you to the pleasure that is being jerked off, slide your pants down" you instructed "What? Do I have to.." he was clearly embarrassed "No. I guess I could just palm you through your pants" you shrugged. Karl sighed in relief and let out a small breath, tilting his head back in the chair and waiting for you to do what you wanted.

Your hand dipped between his legs, your palm rubbing his growing bulge "H-Hey that feels weird" he told you "So what? You want me to stop?" he shut his mouth, encouraging you to keep palming him. "This would feel a lot better if you let your cock free, instead your trapping it in your tight pants and strangling it.." you frowned "F-fine.." Karl blushed as he slowly pulled his pants down.

You watched in delight as he released his penis "Oh is this what you were worried about?" you stared down at it "O-Oh god-" Karl felt humiliated and went to put it away but you stopped him "It's cute.. I wouldn't expect a nerd's penis to be big anyways" you told him. Karl's little cock twitched at your words, moving slightly on its own "oh. my. god. You LIKE when I'm mean to you! That's why you never argue back! It all makes sense now.." Karl looked down to avert eye contact.

"That's perfect Karl, you love when I'm mean to you- and I love to make fun of you! Win Win!" you felt a small rush of excitement. Your hand wrapped around his cock which forced a choked out moan from him, his hands moving to cover his face "you're acting quite rude Karl. Look at your big sister when she's talking to you!" you ordered.

Karl slowly revealed his face, revealing how much pleasure he was having. "F-Feel's weird, let go!" he ushered you to let go of his penis, even though his body disagreed; his hips bucking up into your hand to help finish him off "Trust your big sister." you said as you continued to pump your hand around his cock. "Fuck! Fuck you!" Karl's whole body shuddered as he was having an orgasm, his penis twitching in your hand.

"Wow Karl, that was rude." you huffed and narrowed your eyes, your hand still lingering on his crotch "A-are you done now?" Karl panted as he was trying to catch his breath "Done? I've barely even started!" you laughed maniacally as you began to slowly stroke him again "Ah- no no no, that's too much!" Karl whined. "You want me to stop?" you asked him "Yes!" he exclaimed so you let go and pulled away "What?" Karl was confused and a bit upset "Hm? What is it?" you asked "You're just.. done?" he looked saddened.

"You told me to stop!" you explained "yeah but.. I didn't really mean it.." Karl's cheeks were dusted red "Well come back here then" you grabbed his hips and forced him back down onto his chair. Karl was already eager and bucking his hips up against you, your hand grabbed him again and started to jerk him off "Ah!- Ah-" Karl tried to keep quiet but couldn't help the escaped noises that came out.

You placed your free hand over his mouth to try and muffle his moans, his voice vibrating against your hand "You can never be quiet! Always have something to say, don't you?" you rolled your eyes at him. Karl clenched his eyes shut and tapped the chair repeatedly with his hand to let you know he was ready to cum again, you let him release his load yet again but you didn't remove your hand.

"A-Again?? I can only take so much.." Karl whimpered and whined "You're feeling this way already? But I've only just started!" You frowned "Well I guess I can give you a break now but there won't be any breaks later on when our parents go out to dinner." you stood up and got off him. "T-Thanks.." Karl huffed "For what?" you asked "Thanks for um- pleasuring me?" you scoffed and walked back to your room, ready to return at night time when you had Karl all to yourself.

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*guys lemme know if u want a part 2 bc I could certainly make one of the reader x karl at night time after their parents have left.

#tw stepcest #stepcest cw #karl jacobs x reader smut #karl jacobs smut #c!karl smut #mcyt x reader smut #mcyt smut #dreamsmp x reader smut #dream smp x reader smut #dreamsmp smut #dream smp smut #dsmp x reader smut #dsmp smut

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thedeadhandofseldon · 3 years

Text

The Anti-Mercer Effect

On the Accessibility of D&D, Why Unprepared Casters is so Fun, and Why Haley Whipjack is possibly the greatest DM of our generation.

(Apologies to my mutuals who aren’t in this fandom for the length of this, but as you all know I have never in my life shut up about anything so… we’ll call it even for the number of posts about Destiel I see every day.

To fellow UC fans - I haven’t listened to arc 4 yet, I started drafting this in early August, and I promise I will write a nice post about how great Gus the Bard is once I get the chance to listen to more of his DMing).

Structure - Or, “This is not the finale, there will be more podding cast”

So, first of all, let’s just talk about how Unprepared Casters works. Because it’s kind of unusual! Most of the other big-name D&D podcasts favor this long, grand arcs; UC has about 10 hours of podcast per each arc. And that’s a major strength in a lot of ways: it makes it really accessible to new listeners, because you can just start with the current arc and understand what’s going on!

And by starting new arcs every six or seven episodes, they can explore lots of ways to play D&D! Classic dungeon delve arc! Heist arc! Epic heroes save the world arc! Sportsball arc! They can touch on all sorts of things!

And while I’m talking about that: Dragons in Dungeons, the first arc, makes it incredibly accessible as a show - because it lets the unfamiliar listener get a sense of what D&D actually is. (It’s about telling stories and making your friends feel heroic and laugh and cry, for the record). If I had to pick a way to introduce someone to the game without actually playing it with them, that arc would definitely be it.

And I’d be remise not to note one very important thing: Haley Whipjack and Gus the Bard are just very funny, very charismatic people. Look. Episode 0s tend to be about 50%(?) those two just talking to each other about their own podcast. It shouldn’t work. And yet it DOES, its one of my favorite parts, because Haley and Gus are just cool.

And a side note that doesn’t fit anywhere else: I throw my soul at him! I throw a scone at him - that’s it, that’s the vibe. The whole podcast alternates between laughing with your friends and brooding alone in a dark tavern corner - but the laughs never forced and the dark corner is never too dark for too long.

Whipjack the Great - Or, the DM is Also a Player!

I think Haley Whipjack is one of the greatest Dungeon Masters alive. The plots and characters! The mechanical shenanigans! The descriptions!

Actually, let’s start there: with the descriptions. (Both Haley and Gus do this really fucking well). As we know, Episode 0 of each arc sees the DM reading a description - of a small town, or the Up North, or the recent history of a great party. And Haley always strikes this tricky balance - one I think a lot of us who DM struggle with - between giving too much description and worldbuilding, and not telling us anything at all. She describes people and events in just enough detail to imagine them, but never so much they seem static and unreal - just clear enough to envision, but with enough vagueness left to let your imagination begin to run wild.

While I’m thinking about arc 3’s party, let’s talk about a really bold move she made in that arc: letting the players have ongoing control of their history. Loser Lars! She didn’t try to spell out every detail of this high-level party’s history, or restrict their past to only what she decided to allow - she gave them the broad outlines, and let them embellish it. And that made for a much more alive story than any attempt to create it by herself would have - but I think it takes a lot of courage to let your players have that agency. Most Dungeon Masters (myself included) tend to struggle with being control freaks.

And the plots! Yeah, arc one is built of classic tropes - but she actually uses them, she doesn’t get caught up in subverting everything or laughing at the cliches. And it’s fun! In arc 3, there really isn’t a straight line for the players to follow, either - which makes the game much more interesting and much trickier to run. And her NPCs are fantastic and I will talk about them in the next section.

Above all, though, I think what is really impressive is how Haley balances mechanics, and rules as written, with the narrative and rule of cool - and puts both rules and story in the service of playing a fun game. And the secret to that? She’s the DM, but the DM is a player, and the DM is clearly having fun. Hope Lovejoy mechanically shouldn’t get that spellslot back, but she does, and it’s fun. The changeling merchant in Thymore doesn’t really make some Grand Artistic Narrative better, but wow is it fun. And she never tries to force it one way or the other - the story might be more dramatic if Annie didn’t manage to banish the demon from the vault, but it’s a lot cooler and a lot more fun for the players if Annie gets to be a badass instead - and the rules and the dice say that Annie managed it.

Settings feel like places, NPCs feel like people, and the narrative plot feels like a real villainous plot.

Anyway. I could go on about the various ways in which Whipjack is awesome for quite a while - she’s right, first place in D&D is when your friends laugh and super first place is when they cry - but I’m going to stop here and just. Make another post about it some other time. For now, for the record I hold her opinions about the game in higher esteem than I do several official sourcebooks; that is all.

Characters - Or, Bombyx Mori Is Not an Asshole, And That Matters

Okay, I said I would talk about characters! And I will!

Just a general place to start: the party! All of the first three parties are interesting to me, because they all care about each other. Not even necessarily in a Found Family Trope sort of way, though often that too. But they generally aren’t assholes to each other. The players create characters that actually work together, that are interesting; even when there’s internal divisions like SK-73 v. Sir Mr. Person, they aren’t just unpleasant and antagonistic all the time. Listening to the podcast, we’re “with” these people for a couple hours - and it isn’t unpleasant. That matters a lot. (To take a counter-example: I love Critical Role, but the episode when Vox Machina pranked Scanlan after he died and was resurrected wasn’t fun to listen to, it was just uncomfortable and angering and vaguely cruel).

All of the PCs are amazing, and the players in each arc did a great job. If you disagree with me about that, well, you have the right to be incorrect and I am sorry for your loss. Annie Wintersummer, for one example: tragic and sad and I want to give her a hug, but also Fuck Yeah Wintersummer, and also her familiar Charles the Owl is the cutest and funniest and I love him. And we understand what’s going on with Annie, she isn’t some infinite pool of hidden depths because this arc is 7 episodes and we don’t have time for that, but she also has enough complexity to be interesting. Same with Fey Moss: yeah, a lot of her is a silly pun about fame that carries into how she behaves, but a lot of how she behaves is also down to some good classic half-elven angst about parenthood and wanting to be known and seen and important. (Side note: if your half-elf character doesn’t have angst, well, that’s impressive and also I don’t think I believe you).

There are multiple lesbian cat-people in a 4-person party and they both have requited romantic interests who aren’t each other. This is the future liberals want and I am glad for it.

Sir Mister Person, the human fighter! Thavius, the edge lord! Even when a character is “simple,” they’re interesting, because of how they’re played as people and not action-figures. And that matters a lot.

In the same way: the NPCs. There really aren’t a lot of them! And some of them come from Patreon submissions, so uh good work gang, you’re part of the awesomeness and I’m proud of you! The point being, the NPCs work because enough of them are interesting to matter. It’s not just a servant who opens Count Michael’s door, it’s a character with a name (Oleandra!) and a personality and history. They’re interesting. Penny Lovejoy didn’t need to be interesting, the merchant outside the Laughing Mausoleum didn’t need to be interesting, but they ARE! And Haley and Gus EXCEL at making the NPCs matter, not just to the story but to us as viewers. I agree with Sir Mister Person, actually, I would die for the princesses of the kingdom. I actually care about Gem Lovejoy of all people - that wouldn’t happen in an ordinary campaign! That’s the thing that makes Unprepared Casters spectacular - and, frankly, it’s especially impressive because D&D does not tend to be good at making a lot of interesting compared to a lot of other sorts of stories.

And, just as an exemplar of all this: Bombyx Mori. Immortal, reincarnating(?), and described as the incarnation of the player’s ADHD. I expected to hate Bombyx, because as the mom friend both in and out of my friend-group’s campaigns, the chaos-causer is always exhausting to me. And yeah, Bombyx causes problems on purpose! But! She is not an asshole.

And that’s important. Bombyx goes and sits with the queen and comforts her. Bombyx gives Annie emotional support. Bombyx isn’t just a vehicle to jerk around the DM and other players; Bombyx really is a character we can care about. To compare with another case - in the first couple episodes of The Adventure Zone, the PCs are just dicks. Funny, but dicks. Bombyx holds out an arm “covered in larva” to shake with a count, and robs him of magical items, but she also cares about her friends and other people! She uses a powerful magical gem to save her fertilizer guy from death! Yeah, Bombyx is ridiculous, but she’s not just an asshole the party has to keep around for plot reasons; you can see why her party would keep her around. And one layer of meta up, she’s the perfect example of how to make a chaotic character like that while still being fun for everyone you’re playing with, which is often not the case. And I love her.

The Anti-Mercer Effect - Or, “I think we proved it can be fun, you can have a good time with your friends. And it doesn’t have to be scary, you can just work with what you know”

The Mercer Effect basically constitutes this: Matthew Mercer, Dungeon Master of Critical Role, is incredible (as are all of his players). They’re all professional story-tellers in a way, remember, and so Critical Role treats D&D like a narrative art-form, and it’s inspiring. Seeing that on Critical Role sets impossible standards - and people go into their own home games imagining that their campaigns will be like Critical Role, and the burden of that expectation tends to fall disproportionately on the DM. And the end result, I think, of the Mercer Effect is that we get discouraged or intimidated, because our game isn’t “as good as” theirs. (And I should note - Matt certainly doesn’t want that to be our reaction).

So the Anti-Mercer Effect is two things: it’s D&D treated like a game, and it’s inspiring but not intimidating. And Unprepared Casters manages both of those really freaking well. Because they play it like a game! A UC arc looks just like a good campaign in anyone’s home game. They have the vibes of 20-somethings and college students playing D&D for fun because that’s who they are (as a 20-something college student who plays a lot of D&D, watching it felt like watching my friends play an especially good campaign). They’re trying to tell a good story, sure, and they always do. But first and foremost, they’re trying to have fun, and it shows, and I love the UC cast for it.

And that’s the other half of it: it’s inspiring! It’s approachable; you can see that Haley and Gus put plenty of work into preparing the game but it also doesn’t make you feel like you need hundreds of pages of worldbuilding to run a game. Sometimes a cleric makes Haley cry and she gives them back a spell-slot from their deity! That’s fantastic! It’s just inspiring - listening to this over the summer, when my last campaign had fallen apart under the strain of graduation, is why I decided to plan and run my new one!

That quote from Haley Whipjack that I used as the title for this section? That’s the whole core of this idea, and really, I think, the core of the podcast.

The Mercer Effect is when you go “that’s really cool, I could never do that.” But Unprepared Casters makes you look at D&D and go “wow, that looks really fun. I bet I can do that!” And I love the show for it.

And I bet a lot of you do too.

#unprepared casters #bombyx mori #haley whipjack #long post #this is really rough but I don't have time to keep working on it and it's already a month later than intended

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insomnishnik · 3 years

Text

pairing : obsessive! dom eren x god complex reader *wink* *wonk*

rating : smut, 18+, fluff, crack (?)

wc : 53k

cw : degradation, choking, semi public sex, art student! eren, cockwarming, pussy spanking, mention of bruises and injuries, breeding kink ish, obsessive behavior, stalking, borderline yandere 😁 also pliz I'm new so if this bad lemme know

summary : at the very end of graduation, it's time to say goodbye, college is over, now off to the real world. But before the farewell, you as the student president arrange the one last time after party as a sweet goodbye message, little do you know eren have other plan.

“DO WE HAVE TO?” you murmured as Hitch pushed your back while both of stepping inside of a coffee shop. Fragrance of coffee bean, vanilla air freshener wafted to your nose, the comforting wooden minimalist arabica design greeted your eyes for its pleasing aesthetic scenery.

"Yes, we have to i mean how bad could it be?" she grinned, pulling your arm to her clutches while both of you scoured inside, "besides, the past must stay as the past, it was just a silly president election it's not like he would hold grudges against you for getting elected," she continued, referring to the big college event far ago before the senior year.

That one time when you and Eren Jaeger applied to be the student council president, and like how history spoke, the winner rejoiced, and nobody really care about what happens next to the loser. It was a though fight, you were quite determined to take that core position with your persona, you believed that you could bring greater goods for the community, and you DID do good, but Eren fought back passionately, and you remembered you could see fire in his eyes during his speech at the debate election, he may not smart but he's clever, maybe a little aggressive but hell does he moved so many people's heart, you remembered when he was standing tall and brave on that podium while his sea green eyes glued the room together, the intimacy that is fiery and optimistic, but as the whole world know destiny said otherwise, without your own anticipation

you won.

And since then your reign begun. You rule well, you made plenty achievements as student president and you never been so proud of yourself, since then you never lose your dedication for your people, and the feel of being a victor, and oh how you loved the feel of being powerful.

You and Hitch walked upstairs to the second loft of the coffee shop after you both ordered the drinks you wanted, "I dunno Hitch, i don't think that this is a good idea," you mumbled to the girl next to you, while you scratching the back of your ear, "when Armin said not to mess with Eren i think he meant it."

Sure you were delighted with your victory, but you still couldn't help yourself to feel bad for Eren, there's this strange tingle of guilt vine your stomach when you, the possessor approached your ex rival far a month ago, he gave you this bitter dirty look as you waved him a polite good morning, then he stormed off without a single word, you felt like he was prestige to look into your eyes since then.

"And when i said he was a wuss, and a man child for going all off emo after that election i also meant it," Hitch rolled her eyes, she pat your back as a reassurance before you two finally found the person you've been looking for, almost unrecognizable from the last time you guys bumped to each other, for a moment your eyes widened to the now Eren Jaeger.

There he was sitting all pretty at the smoking area, his hair was pulled onto a messy bun with a few loose strands on his nape, he was far more built than the boy you used to know, his bushy eyebrows looking furrowed to a sketchbook, the charcoal pencil he's holding dances on top of it. He was styled in a thin knitted black long sleeve top that hugged his muscular body tightly, army green cargo pants, and combat boots — you know, those kind of boots you wear to a rock concert just to kick someone — his rolled sleeves, revealing his veiny arms that covered with tattoos. His long legs is stretched to the chair next to him while he is leaning against the wall.

Hitch glanced at you, she cackled noticing you googling at Eren, she pulled you by your wrist approaching the brunet, "you'll be fine," she snickered, while you could only let out a soft sigh, here goes nothing.

Hitch signal her presence to Eren with a light cough, a small thud hit the surface of his sketchbook after he dropped his pencil. His gaze shifts to both of you who were standing by his side, he raised his left brow when his eyes met yours, you stared back at Eren and he outstared you blankly, "Jaeger," you hesitated.

About time you finally came to me.

"Y/N," he replied, calling you by your first name. His expression never change, they're rather cold, unimpressed, he studied both of you, then back to you, he lift his chin up as he locked his eyes on you, "you brought a friend." Intruder, he finally said after a brief silence, Eren closed his sketchbook and then cracked his knuckles, Hitch pulled you, taking a seat in front of Eren.

"Now let's skip the chit chat, because by the way Eren, you smells musty," Hitch waved her hand in front of her face, she's not wrong though, he smells like tobacco and axe body spray. Furthermore when Hitch explained the reasons of hers and yours arrival to Eren, his gaze never really left you, sometimes he would spare Hitch small glances and nods as confirmation of himself still listening, but his attention was on you.

And you willingly stares back, you still couldn't read his expression, they're as calm as the morning blue sky, they're just so empty it sucks you in, maybe it's the blunt hatred and envy from him for your presidential position, or maybe it was something else, you even almost think that you two are basically eye fucking each other.

You extended him the proposal and the selected material details to him, it's almost graduation, and you're running out of time to find someone who could make an exclusive design for the jackets you are planning to make as a gift for the after party event. The other councilor members and you also haven't decide the theme yet, it has to be perfect. Your last hope is Eren, the fine arts student all the girls in school droll over, even though his charisma was slightly dimmed after his loss at the election, he still got his charm, and you really prayed to Goddess Fortuna because you don't want to risk looking for someone else to customize this specific special item and just to get disappoint by the erratic result, at least when Eren agree to take the work, someone could watch over.

"No fucking way," Eren let out a smug chortled, "the president needs my help," he added in a sneering tone. Cute.

"So you agree or not Eren," you try to suppress your nerve, and you really try not to punch his cocky face, the way he throw his head back a little so he gave you this kind of kubrick stare, gazing into your soul as if he wants to eat you alive, and just like they said, if looks could kill, you're probably be ripped apart by now.

"What if i say no?" he continued, tapping his boot's toe on the wooden floor.

"You'll waste your talent," you gift a thin smile that hides a very big urge to stab him repeatedly.

Eren chuckled, he looked away towards the window before he lean forward to you, "What happen to the other art students, L/N? Did they finally acknowledge your overly perfectionist bossy self or what?"

"And what about it?" you argued, leaning to his face, he wanted to humiliate you, he wanted you to get on your knees and beg, but you still have your dignity.

"Uh, what is this," Hitch hesitated, "i am highly uncomfortable with the atmosphere we created in this room," what's with the eye fucking? Hitch thought, she felt like she's interrupting a really heated make out session but instead of kissing it was exchanging pure hatred, Hitch nudged you by your elbow, giving you a look.

You gritted your teeth and pursed your lips together, leaning closer to Eren's face, "Alright, if this is about that stupid president election we had together grow up Eren! The world doesn't evolve in your stupid drama queen head, so please since i'm asking you nicely before i could fu-" You stopped your bust as a waitress came over with the drinks you ordered earlier, you glared angrily at Eren as you caught a tug of amused smirk at the corner of his lips, it was the fact that you desperately needs his help but still play all bitchy, he found it funny.

Sure you have your dignity, and he is willing to destroy it just because he can.

After the waitress left, you tasted your fresh latte angrily, making Eren chuckled under his husky breath, while on the other side Hitch is silently witnessing the tense between you two.

"Fine," Eren broke the silence after a few minutes since the waitress left, "i'll take the work." he sat up, you nodded and watched as that key necklace of his dangling out from his collar, and when your eyes laid on the toned chest that peaking under his shirt, you gulped your saliva and quickly looked away, "good, thank you for your understanding."

You clasps your hands together and you could hear Hitch's faint sigh of relief, "great so now i think we have our deal, you know Professor Levi's tea shop right? tomorrow we're doing a gathering, be there before 8, and if-"

who says that i'm finished doll? Eren tug another smirk, "but with some condition."

⊱✿⊰

"For real? No party organizer available until next January?" you groaned in frustration, frantically flipping through pages of your journal, Hitch and Armin walks by your side to the long table area.

Chaos.

Chaos everywhere, you feel like your head is going to explode, your blood boils, and there's this uncomfortable anxiety under your skin, crippling under you and devouring you slowly. You've been overworked yourself the entire night after your meeting with Eren, you were brainstorming for your graduation speech, activity recap, and of course other ornaments for the very last project you're having in your senior year, you cried for three hours while listening to montgomery ricky then cried again over the document you accidentally deleted.

You're exhausted.

Mentally and physically, you woke up with puffy eyes and wrecked brain, but you knew that everything must go on, and no, you won't back down, everything has to be perfect,

It has to be perfect.

Hitch pouted as she watches you typing on your laptop, she snakes her arms around your waist and leaned her head against your shoulder, watching you making some kind of budget recap, "sweetie you should rest and lay down." She spoke with a soft smile.

You pursed your lips together before you leaned your head on top of hers, not leaving your eyes from your laptop, "thanks Hitch, but i'm alright, i'll just finish this and i'll take a break for a bit." You just can't really trust anything without yourself being under control or watching over, you're afraid that everything would astray far from your definition of 'perfection,' this empire you've been building, and this is your last legacy the next generation will remember, and you wanted it to be remarkable.

"No dumbass, the last catering service was too expensive and apparently our university was filled with cheapskates." argued a voice from across the room.

"Well we have no choice???" other voice argued back, "Or we can rely on your very bad cooking skill Kirstein, just pray nobody's gonna die from food poisoning."

You huffed at the sight of Ymir and Jean who was sitting face to face on the floor, both are on their phone scrolling on google, you looked around and found Sasha, Marco and Connie, chatting across you, and you looked over to the three people next to you, your vice president Hitch, your treasurer Armin, and your secretary Mikasa. You couldn't help yourself but smiling at your team, they works so well.

Then you frowned as your realized something, "Have Eren-"

A short blonde girl with a tray of drinks and snacks entered the room, "Y'all snack time!" she called out with a large grin on her face.

Ymir's face lit up as she walked up to her girlfriend, Sasha sprinted towards Historia, going feral over food as usual.

"Ugh finally," you chuckled to Jean's mumble. Soon, half of the room crowded the blonde girl, reaching for snacks and drinks, your eyes fixated as you slowly notice the presence of the familiar sea green eyes, you watches as Eren strolls inside of the meeting room, he yawned before he took a seat on Hitch's place, your frowned slightly, "excuse you?"

"Excuse me?" he replied, plastering that damn cocky smile, he looked to you up and down, definitely mocking you under his degrading gaze, dammit y/n did you overworked yourself?

"Well have you look at yourself, President." he snickered, suddenly a sketch design laid in front of you, you shift your eyes to Eren, before you took the papers on your hands. Soft grazes of colored pencil and ink, the art was delicate yet firm, "what is this?" you asked dumbly to the design of two bomber jackets, each of the jackets has their own scrawled side notes of the color details, embroidery, and even fabric material.

"Both jacket will be make from satin, no argument, satin," Eren spoke, he pointed his polished finger nail to the design, "the girls will have the yellow one, the boys will take the red, it'll have our Uni symbol and our number," he explained, "should be ready as soon as possible," Eren watches you closely, waiting for you to say something. Part of him.....just wants you to react, just anything, just any reaction exclusively for him.

You blinked slowly, wow. Honestly it's beautiful, looks like it was Harajuku style inspired, you can't wait to touch the final craft, you glanced at Eren, "thank you," you spoke finally, "it's really beautiful."

I'm glad you like it. "Of course it's beautiful, i made it," he replied with a smug face, he cracked his knuckles then tapped his fingers to the wooden table, "now now, what do we have here."

It was part of Eren's condition. One, he wanted to be fully involved in the graduation ceremony prep and the after party. Two, most importantly nobody touch his creation while he have full control of it, you reluctantly gave him the responsiblity to handle the venue decoration and the theme, most of the people in your team weren't really pleased with that decision, but like you all have time to think? But after considering it, you felt like it would be good idea to have extra hands helping.

Anything,

To reach the absolute perfection.

⊱✿⊰

"I'm so glad, that this is almost over, because i could not bear drinking another monster and espresso or i might get caffeine intoxication," you grinned as you earned chuckles through the dinner table, it was all paid off, and the grand event was right in front of your eyes, you could already imagine yourself standing on that podium, delivering your grand speech, high and god like.

But now, celebration first.

The admiration looks from your team and the last year student council team — who decided to join for the gig — feeds your ego, there's Zeke, Nicolo, Reiner, Pieck and her girlfriend Yelena, Porco and Bertholdt. Your friends really look up to you, from the day you earned your position, they knew they could count on you. "Thank you, thank you for all of the hard works this season, i would never ask for a better team, you guys are the best that i could ever wished for," you grinned and picked up the can of beer from the table, everybody raises their drinks, and you looked at the edge of the table, where your graduated senior, Zeke Jaeger sitting down, giving you a proud look, he was a student president before you, "this is for everyone, our community has never been this great, because you all dedicated your hearts." As you cheers together, you looked around, something is missing, you can feel it, yet you can't find any solid answer for that feeling.

It was a simple outdoor Korean barbecue party in your house's backyard, after all done, you wanted nothing but to treat your friends, because that's what they deserved for serving you right. It was returning favor, while waiting for the meat to be cook perfectly by your senior Nicolo, you sat besides Mikasa as you both chats, while Armin was next to her, busy with his phone. In the distance, chaotic guitar strums and jams from drunk Connie and Jean cracking the air together with everyone that hyping them up. You pressed your chin against Mikasa's shoulder while both of you giggling over a twitter thread.

"Eren said he's coming over," Armin announced to both of you, he looked down to his phone and let out a heavy sigh.

So that was the missing piece.

"Why's the sigh?" you asked Armin.

Armin hesitated, he looked around everywhere that isn't you, he rubbed his hand through his undercut, it feels like watching someone having a very conflicted mind war with themself, he then finally impaled you with a mixed expression, "Y/N," he started, "i don't know how to say this but....." He glanced over at Mikasa, and you followed him.

The dark haired girl rather gave him a surprised expression, a some kind of you did not! look. You exchanged the utterly confusion to both of them, Mikasa nodded slowly, "She needs to know, Armin."

"I need to know what?"

"What are you guys talking about?" you turned around and sees Eren standing right in front of you, bruised up and bleeding, his knuckles was fucked in a shade of dark red and purple, strands of hair falling in front of his face, Mikasa quickly stood up, "Eren did you—"

"Yes i did," he shot her a cold glare, you could see from the corner of your eyes that Zeke started to approaching, Eren's eyes then finally found Armin, who's looking scared and nervous more than ever, "tell me, what's the interesting story Armin?" his tone was striking and icy, under his husky voice, you could track hints of slurs because of alcohol.

Armin went quiet, he gripped his knuckles, what is this? something must happened and you didn't know, and you hated that. You hated when things was out of your reach. "It's okay Eren, you should check your wounds, they look pretty bad," Armin swallowed, his words came out more threatening than he anticipated.

"No, no, no, i wanted to know what you gonna say to Y/N," Eren moves closer to Armin, "you are not trying to tell her anything bad about me right?"

They looked like they're ready to throw hands, but Zeke was already slips between them, holding the both boys's chests with his flat palms, "come on now guys, let's not." he hesitated.

"No, let's." Eren insisted, he slapped his brother's hand, you quickly pulled him down by his arm, he flinched when he felt your touch, Eren glance at you, and for a split second his eyes went soft, it was that soft that you felt nothing but pure affection from his sea green eyes, then something took over his body, he suddenly pulled you by your collar, lifting you up, moving your face closer to his.

His eyes were bloodshot, you squeezed his wrists while kicking your feet on the air, "you," he growled, his warm breath smells like alcohol, you blinked slowly, scanning Eren's animalistic glare, but there is no hate in his eyes, you found yourself trying to look for it but there it none, instead there's this raging desire, he looked at you like you were his prey, "Eren-" you choked, for the first time, you feel powerless.

"I hate you," he hissed, but all you could sense was lie, his mortal fingers squeezing you so deadly but you feel the comfort of it, the bizarrely embracing lust, and his existence blurs all the noises around you, just you and Eren Jaeger. "you took everything from you," he continued, "i woke up everyday wishing you dead."

You knitted your eyebrows, and you feel your godly ichor rushes back through your veins, a disgusted smirk appeared on your face, belittling him for lying, "liar."

Then huge arms pulled Eren from you, tackling him to the ground, Mikasa caught you before you hit the ground, Hitch stepped in front of you, shielding you from Eren who was struggling under Zeke, "Eren what the hell!" she shouted. Mikasa helped you up and pulled you close to her chest, "Y/N are you okay?" she sounded so scared, questions and assumptions popping in your head about what happens between Mikasa, Armin, and Eren. You looked up, finding Reiner helping Zeke restraining his own brother. You knew a minute ago that guy attacked you, but seeing Eren in that position just feels so wrong, you never thought you'll get drew by a guy like Eren Jaeger, but here you are finding yourself shoving aside your pride while approaching the two blonds. You put your hand on Zeke's shoulder, squeezing them gently, "it's okay," your delicate tone shocks him, "let him go Zeke."

You could feel everyone giving you a jaw drop, but when all eyes on you, you find yourself only looking at Eren.

After a tense moment, Zeke and Reiner finally let go of the brunet, you pulled Eren up then you put the tip of your fingers to his chin, examining his wounds, he scoffed and avoided your eyes, dropping his eyes to the ground. "Let's get that clean up," you mumbled and dragged him by his hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. Leaving everyone in a ambiguous silence.

"Why are they leaving? the wagyu is ready."

You walked upstairs to your room, no words exchange both of you before you finally entered the bathroom with Eren, you let go of his hand, your heartbeat strangely skipping inside your chest, while you were searching for the medicine kit in the cabinet, when you finally turn around, you found Eren already sitting on the toilet seat, you kneeled down in front of him and you opened the medicine kit, you pulled a towel from the drawer and stood up, wetting it in the sink, "what happen?" you finally spoke.

Eren let out a deep chuckle, he wiped his bloody nose with his thumb then wiped it off on his jeans, gross. "Why do you care," he asserted.

You rolled your eyes and kneeled back in front of him, with dripping wet cloth on your right hand, "please you stormed on me, lifted me up and looked at me like you wanted fuck me against the table while also wanted to burn me alive at the same time." you gave him a judging look. You took his hands, and then slowly pressed the dampen cloth on his bloody knuckles, he didn't flinch, Eren remained silence while he watches you. You could feel his smirk while you were treating his wounds. "Have i told you how hideous you look tonight?" he asked quietly.

"No, tell me."

Eren then moved his left hand away from you, extending them, he caressed his thumb on your cheekbone, made you froze, his hand then traveled to your ear, it tugged your hair behind them, "i cannot." He whispered softly.

You looked up, and put the now reddish cloth on the floor, you moved closer to the burnet in front of you, you intertwined your fingers with his once again, the tense on his shoulders visibly relax while his pupils widened to the presence of you, "now would you tell me what happen?" your voice sweetened, melodic in his ear, and it seems like he's lured enough by it.

Eren huffed a chuckle, he looked down to both of your hands, "Had a fight with Pops," he shrugged, "took the anger on the wall." You moved closer to his face, close enough to smell the liquor in his breath. Eren stared at you, he never imagine he would have the blessing to be this close with you, he was always watching you from afar. Those interrogation towards Armin regarding you, questions after questions on your personal life, forcing Armin to dug deeper and helped Eren fulfilling his needs on you, he'd followed you after school, to your favorite coffee shop, your home so he'll know your address, to where ever he could reach you, man... he'll go after you to the edge of the world if that's where you're heading.

"Do you still hate me?" you asked, and to be honest the question kind of scares you, because after these past few weeks of spending more time with Eren Jaeger, you finally caught in his fire, his flaming intimacy you thought was long gone, and you also surprises yourself for not getting pissed off by the feeling, because it makes you feel vulnerable.

Eren grazes his thumb on your jaw as if you were made of glass, he kneeled down to the floor with you, so you both could be equal, no high ground. "The truth is my darling, i never was," he confirmed, "after you won that election it was my last straw because from the first time i laid my eyes on you, Love.... You have bewitched me body and soul," he's been watching over you from the distance and you still as pathetic as he could remember, maybe it's the way you stole glances at him, the way you would secretly checking him out but little did you know that he notices everything, he's been reading you like an open book without having to flip through every pages, because you already spread open for him, "you have became the very thing that is out of my reach, Love. And for i have fancy you, and you'll be mine not just in my mind but fully," and he is itching to taste you. His warmth envelopes you to a sense of safety, he trails his hands to your waist, pulling you closer to him, and you melt like a candle on fire. Right above you stand an entity greater than yourself, the essence of mystery that fold itself in front of you, and with the universe speak between you, everything is a clarity.

And you, you don't get it, you thought it was all envy to the position you have, and for the first time, you crave something other than power, "Did you just quoted Pride and Prejudice for me, Jaeger?" you snakes your arms around his neck while his growing bulge strokes on your clothed cunt, the rough material of his jeans made your arousal grow thicker, "my, my, my i used to think that you were just a pretty face with zero common sense," you teased, nuzzling your nose against him.

His husky chuckle vibrates against your skin, without warning he pushes you up against the wall and you immediately jumped onto his waist with your legs, you gasped as your back hit the cold surface, Eren kneading your butt cheeks as he was holding you up, his chest pressed on yours, warm breath mixes together, "ouch, did you just call me dumb?" you snickered, Eren tilts his head before he smirked, "maybe we could be equally dumb after i make you babble nonsense with my cock." His mouth devouring yours feverishly. Frantic gestures rid you and him of clothes on your body, while you helped Eren unbuckling his belt, his teeth grazes yours, tongues fighting for dominance with each other, he latched his lips onto yours, hungry for more taste, you started to sucking his bottom lip while Eren savor your taste, he pushes more for a deeper kiss, his hand fondling your clothed boob, then it slipped under them, as he found your stiffened nipple, you felt his smirk between your kiss, and a moan escaped from your lips, they're already swollen and you knew you needed air soon, but without your realizing, you already breath through his air through the kiss.

You unhooked your bra while Eren pressed you harder against the wall, his cock was already free from his jeans and boxer, his beautiful tip was coated in precum, when you finally exposed your breasts in front of him, the animalistic side possessed him back, Eren kneads your breasts greedily causing you to mewl, shivers running down your spine, and you unconsciously grinds you drenched cunt against his waist, Eren cackled.

"What a fucking whore, you looked like a cat in heat."

You whined when his flat palm hit your cunt, he rubs the dampen clothed surface of your clit, Eren brought his mouth to your breast and started to circling his tongue on your nipple, making your back arched and you grinding to nothingness of his waist, "whore," he spat, a string of saliva bridge between your skin and his lips, "is this what you called a student president? i don't think so." Eren grip your throat and slowly adding pressure to your air circulation with his index finger and thumb, his other hand has been stroking his own cock for awhile, he uses his precum as lube and your eyes twinkled to the beautiful sight.

Your lips parted, he let out a throaty groan to your ear just to tease you, "what if i just jack myself and leave you like this?" the menacing grin appeared on his face, your desperate look just pleased him even more, he groaned under his breath as he feeling himself twitching, and your drooling pussy just looking tastier than ever, Eren inhaled and faked a pout, "aw, what is it? don't you want to walk around with my cum dripping from your slutty hole aren't you? that is sinful my Love, won't it gonna stain your pride, Miss President?"

You cursed under you breath, and another slap landed on your cunt, you threw your head back as Eren squeezed you against the wall, "nu uh, bad words," he growled, "what do you want, Y/N? Use your fucking mouth if you want something, did your parents never tell you?" another hard slap on your cunt made you gasp, you cried louder, and Eren shushed you while peppering kiss on your naked shoulder, "careful darling they might hear you from downstairs."

He pecked your nose before he finally aims his cock to your entrance, stroking his tip to your dripping cunt, "what do you want, Y/N? say it." He repeated.

"Your cock!" you whimpered, "please pound me with your cock.... please Eren.. i just want it inside.."

He slammed into you, causing you to let out a sharp noise, "Oh, like this?" Eren felt your soft warm walls hugging him so tightly, as if you guys just fit so perfectly together, he held his hand on your tummy to prevent you from grinding your greedy self, letting your cunt clenching him by itself, "fuck you're so tight my Love," he groaned subtly.

"E-eren please move..... i'm begging you...." you sobbed so pathetically. Eren moved his face close to yours and pinned your wrists above your head, "this will need an outcome don't you think?" he tilted his head, making you wept for his cock to move even more, suddenly an idea popped in his head, "I will move," he said, "i'll shoot my loads in you and then you'll be mine, i want you to want me so badly, i'm going to imprison you, and then.... just then...it'll be just you and me, always and forever," he dug his face on the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent so they'll stay in his head, but he knew it won't, you're his own personal drug anyways, "promise, Darling?" Eren whispered against your skin.

You shivered under him, your eyes rolls at the back of your head, your pussy is aching with lust, so needy for his cock. You quickly nodded your head, "p-promise."

Eren kissed your neck, sucking them briefly, leaving a visible mark on your soft skin, "good girl."

He pulled his cock from you, leaving just the tip, before then he impaled, filling you up with his length, he slide so easily onto your meat, your legs shivered as he endlessly pushed deeper inside you, and you could feel his tip kissed your cervix, Eren then started to moves at a quick pace, "you like that so much hm? taking my cock like a little slut," he said velvety, turning you on even more. He buried your moan into a deep kiss, his big arm scoot your hips close to him as he ramming his cock with no mercy onto your walls, his other hand still pinning your wrists, as if you're gonna escape from him. You started to rolling your hips on him, making him move more faster, you're both skin to skin, grinding onto each other desperately, "Eren....s'big...so deep..." you moaned. He continues to pound into you.

"Fuck, that's right baby say my name."

"Eren!"

After a minute he completely stopped, you opened your eyes and your face shows confusion, before you could ask any questions, he suddenly slams all of his length into you, causing you to yelp both in pain and pleasure, the lewd sound of skin slapping made you curl your toes, he pounding into you like there's no tomorrow, you threw your head back, your tongue lolling out from your lips, he slamming all his length in and out of you repeatedly until you're a shaking panting mess, an amused look plastered on his cocky face, and his hips didn't stop dipping on you, not letting you think straight or put up any fight, "come on, fucking take it like the cumslut you are."

You choked on your breath as the knot in your stomach getting tighter, "E-ren... hugs...hugs....?" you purred to him, he finally let go of your wrists and let your head fell against his shoulder, he increases his phase that you didn't know was possible, you warped your arms around him as he did to you, and you dragged your nails through his sweaty back, Eren started to whisper sweet nothings as he felt himself twitching, he slurred curses underneath his groaned, his veins popped as he gripped you tightly, his muscles flexes at each moves.

You didn't dare to question him when he said that he'll fill you up inside, because no matter what your answer is, he'll do it anyway. The sight of his hard rock abs and v lines sent you over the edge, “Eren i’m gonna cum—“

“cum with me, Darling.”

You tasted the bitter tint in your tongue as you started seeing stars, you vision went black as Eren rides you to your orgasm while fluid started dripping down your thighs, your body is shaking uncontrollably, Eren let out a loud groan as he riding himself to his own high using your abused cunt, he shot his warm thick load onto your womb, making sure you take all of it, you buried your face on his neck, he slowly pulls out his cock and watches the white liquid oozing from your hole. Eren lifted up your chin, he cupped your cheek and pressed a soft kiss against your lips, mixing your pants together, “mine.” he moaned to your soft plump lips.

“yours."

⊱✿⊰

#eren jaeger #eren jaeger x reader #eren jaeger x reader smut #eren jaeger x reader fluff #eren jaeger fluff #eren jaeger smut #attack on titan smut #aot #eren yeager #eren yaeger x reader smut #eren yeager x reader fluff #eren yeager fluff #eren yeager smut #happy birthday eren

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firstofficerwiggles · 4 years

Text

Sending a Message

Pairing: Din Djarin x Female Reader

Rating: T, there are sexy situations, i.e. touching, but no actual sex, one use of the f-word, but mostly fluff and some longing

Summary: Basically, you and Din are in a cantina and you need his help to get men to stop hitting on you. You have an established friendship with him but neither of you have expressed your true *romantic* feelings. Enjoy!

Word Count: 2900ish

Author’s note: I love fanfiction and have been reading it for a looong time now, but I finally decided to take the plunge and write one myself. What can I say? Din is very inspiring. It’s very self-indugent and I hope you like it.

I wrote a Part 2 to this story (18+ version) (T version)

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The child is a sticky mess having eaten his way through a bag of ripe berries as you were trying to keep him occupied so the Mandalorian could suss out information for others of his kind who might know where to find the Jedi.

It’s been roughly three months since you joined the Mandalorian’s crew to help out with the child. You were enamored with the sweet little green baby the moment you saw him with Din in that marketplace back on Tatooine. Stressed and exhausted, Din let you pick up the child and entertain him while he loaded supplies on to a cart. You accompanied the two of them around on the rest of their errands that day, offering helpful advice and somehow gaining the Mandalorian’s trust fast enough to have him offer you a job as the child’s caretaker by the end of the day. You surprised yourself with how quickly you agreed to the arrangement, but in the end, you knew there was nothing left for you on Tatooine but memories and an empty house.

So now here you were, fairly content with your role as nanny to the child, although not quite prepared for how risky travelling with the Mandalorian could be. There were days when you could not believe the situations you found yourself in, yet through it all, you knew you had made the right decision. This was largely in part to the Mandalorian himself. There was just something so undeniably compelling about him. He was an execptional hunter and frankly, a deadly assassin, but he always seemed willing to put his violent skills towards a good cause, no matter how hopeless it may have seemed. But yet, no matter how lethal he could be, he was also so heartbreakingly soft and gentle with his small son, demonstrating a fierce protectiveness that had spread to you too. At first, the Mandalorian wasn’t much of a conversationalist, but little by little, you had begun to get to know him and had fallen into an easy friendship of sorts with him. All well and good, but, the more you knew about him, the more you started to feel an attraction to him. It started slow, and you played it off as just a weakness for his handsome armor and, let’s be honest, his strong, fit physique underneath all that beskar. But then, he started to share small jokes with you, ask you more about yourself, and reveal details about his own life, including his name, Din Djarin. After that, you really couldn’t deny your feelings, but you kept them to yourself not wanting to upset the contented balance you had achieved nor wanting to put him in the uncomfortable position of having to turn you down. Still though, the longing was there, even when you tried to distract yourself.

“Wow, look at you! I think we have a new record, kiddo.” Din has made his way back to you and is gently teasing his son. He scoops him up into his arms and the child coos with glee but also puts his berry-smeared hands all over his father’s shiny armor.

“Oh no! I thought I’d have a chance to clean him up before you returned.” You apologize a little embarassed.

“It’s not a big deal; we’ll take care of it.” Din has accepted the messiness of fatherhood in stride, “Let’s head over to that cantina. We’ll get cleaned up and you two can get some food while we’re there.”

As Din heads to the back of the cantina in search of a fresher to deal with the berry mess, you spy two seats at the bar and carefully make your way through the crowd. Several people, mostly men it seems, smile widely at you as you pass. It’s packed in here, but the warmth of so many bodies together is welcome after the blustery wind that had picked up outside. You shed your heavy cloak and drape it over the back of one of the barstools both so you can save the seat for Din and, you think eagerly, give him the chance to see the pretty dress you decided to wear today. It’s one of your favorites but he hasn’t seen it yet, however, with the cooler weather on this planet you were beginning to think you wouldn’t get a chance to show it off. Not that you should be thinking like that, you roll your eyes at yourself and your silly crush on the stoic Mandalorian. You’re just getting yourself settled at the bar when the bartender places a brightly colored drink in front of you. Confused you say, “I haven’t ordered yet.” as he just points behind you to a burly looking man with a scruffy beard. The man is grinning confidently at you,

“My treat, pretty lady! We rarely get strangers like you in here!”

“Thank you,” you demure, “but I really can’t accept.”

“Nonsense! You go ahead and enjoy and then we can get to know each other.” He winks at you.

“Maybe she’d prefer one of these,” another man has sauntered over, this one a lanky man with a bottle of something in his hand, “I think she might prefer something with more of a bite to it.” His entendre not lost on you, you hold up your hand and shake your head to fend him off when yet a third man tries to get your attention,

“Don’t let these bozos tell you what you want; I’ll get you whatever your heart desires!”

“I can buy my own drink, thanks,” you cut him off, turn back to the bartender, and manage to order your own drink and some food for you and the child, but this last guy is persistent and sleezy, coming over and perching himself on the barstool you were saving for Din. “Hey, I’m saving that for my…” what should you call him? “friend,” you finish lamely.

“Well, no problem, I’m looking forward to meeting her too.” he waggles his eyebrows at you suggestively. Giving him a sarcastic glare, you retort, “I don’t think he’d be interested.”

Things are starting to get out of hand, but thankfully, Din has spotted you amongst your crowd of admirers and with a small, rather amused tilt of his helmet and a bit of a shove, he’s now by your side with the child cooing happily from his satchel. “How about a booth?” he suggests, and you swear you can hear the amusement in his voice.

“Great idea” you reply, hopping down from your stool and snatching your cloak back from the other one.

“Oh c’mon baby, that tin can can’t make you happy like I can” the guy who rudely stole Din’s seat calls after you. Your face erupts in a blush and you hope to hell that Din didn’t hear him amidst the noise of the cantina. The other men voice their frustrations too at your departure. You put your hand on Din’s bicep steering him away from these guys just in case. You don’t need Din starting a bar fight over you. You’re still holding his arm and following Din closely when yet another man comes up to you,

“This Mandalorian isn’t bothering you, baby, is he?” this idiot dares to ask.

“No. He is not.” you grit out as Din says, “She’s fine.” in his best don’t-fuck-with-me voice. It’s lost on this drunk fool though as he just lets out “Woo hoo! She sure is!” and tries to slap your ass, but thankfully you dodge him just in time.

You’re starting to doubt the wisdom in coming into this cantina but now that you’re making it to a booth with Din, you figure you should be all right. The booth has a curved seat following the shape of its round table and as Din places the child in the middle of the seat, he sits down to his right. You slide into your side of the booth opposite Din but before you can get fully seated, a man from the booth right behind you leans over, grabs your wrist and leeringly says, “I got a much better seat for you, mama.” and gestures to his crotch. Repulsed, you slap his hand away and head over to Din’s side of the table. That creep was disgusting but he did give you an idea.

“Will you do me a huge favor?” you ask Din, “Always” he replies instantly. Putting your hand on his shoulder, you climb into his lap while sliding one arm around his neck and then bringing your other hand to rest on his cuirass. You can sense his surprise, yet his arm wraps around your waist instinctively.

“Play along, please?” you whisper to him.

“What are you doing, exactly?” he wants to know.

“Sending a message.” You tuck your head in closer to his in a clearly affectionate way and place a kiss on his helmet where his cheek would be.

“What message would that be?” Din asks still a bit stunned by your actions.

“That I’m yours.” You pause as he absorbs this and then you tell him quietly, “I need you to be a little handsy.”

“Handsy?” he tilts his helmet at you “This feels like a trap.”

“No, I want you to. Be handsy.” You tell him again.

“Ok” he drawls out, “but don’t punch me.”

“I won’t.” You flutter your lashes at him to give the impression to this room of horny strangers that you’re flirting with Din.

Din gives a tiny shrug that you can feel more than see but then brings his free hand up to your face. His gloved hand slowly strokes your cheek as he then lets his fingers trace over your jaw and then down your neck and chest, slowing down even more as he reaches your cleavage and then just gently ghosts his fingers between your breasts before resting his hand just beneath them. You feel your breath hitch and get caught in your throat at the intimacy of his touch and you have to remind yourself that this is just for show, just to get these losers to stop hitting on you. Reminding yourself of the message you want to send, you wonder if this is too subtle. You need to make this definitive.

“Be a little more obvious,” you tell Din, the blush returning to your cheeks, I can’t believe I’m doing this.

“More?” Din tries to confirm, “What do you have in mind?”

“Put your hand up my skirt.”

“Ok, now that is definitely a trap.” he chuckles lightly.

“Do it. Put your hand up my skirt,” you practically demand.

“Well, I’m not going to say no to that,” he responds appearing to be amused by this whole situation. He takes his hand, starts to play with the hem of your dress, and then slowly starts to slide his hand up your thigh under your skirt kneading gently as he goes. You feel like you are dying, it is so sensual and so exactly what you have been dreaming of for weeks now. You knew he would be good at this and it’s killing you that it’s just an act. You squirm a little in his lap unable to help yourself and you think you can feel his own arousal, but you tell yourself you must be imagining it.

Din cannot believe this is happening, how is he this lucky? When he caught sight of the men hitting on you at the bar, he figured it was inevitable that you’d be surrounded by would-be suitors and he cursed himself for leaving you alone in a place like this even for a few minutes. A quick scan of the room showed him that you were absolutely the most beautiful woman there. Not that he was surprised, as he’s rarely seen anyone as stunningly gorgeous as you in his opinion. Plus, given this sexy dress you have on, he’s lucky he didn’t have to pry one of them off you. He noticed it right away before you left the ship earlier and had to put on your cloak, but he was hoping to keep that sight to himself. He knows he shouldn’t think of you that way, but he has given up trying to ignore his feelings for you. It’s not just your beauty, but who you are as a person. He’s never met anyone who’s so easy to talk to and who treats him with such respect and kindness. It shocks him how strongly he trusts you and the way he’s let down his guard around you. You might not realize it but you are the best friend he’s ever had, and although he wants more, he’s not quite ready to risk your friendship. If he messes this up, you might see him as just another jerk hitting on you.

Speaking of, Din figured his intimidating presence would keep the jerks away once he got back over to you, but these fools had clearly never met a Mandalorian before because they didn’t have the good sense to leave you alone even when he was standing right next to you. He had been sure he was going to have to punch the creep that grabbed you but then you were sitting in his lap before he had a chance to stand up and defend you. And now, now, he was cuddling with you in the middle of this crowded cantina, touching you in ways he hadn’t let himself dare to think about. He didn’t need the child’s powers to feel the waves of sheer envy coming off of the men in the room. He smirked to himself under his helmet, letting his hand slide up even higher on your thigh than he would have dared but just because he could.

You are becoming entirely swept away by Din’s ministrations on your thigh, and you hear yourself sighing his name, making him smile even more unbeknownst to you.

“Hmm?” he responds gently

“I--,” but you’re cut off by the waiter finally bringing the food.

“Here’s your order, sir” the waiter gives Din a look that is both impressed and jealous as you hide your face in Din’s neck mortified that you have gotten so carried away with this charade.

“Thanks.” Din tells him, slowly removing his hand from under your dress. You slide off his lap into the booth next to him so you can eat. Din keeps his arm wrapped around your shoulders though and you’re still pressed up against his side. You turn away slightly towards the child who has been amusing himself somehow all this time. You give yourself a chance to regain your composure as you focus on giving him some food. You had started to forget the kid was even there and you feel your face flushing again at your shameless behavior. You take a deep breath and remind yourself that this was necessary, and as you glance around the cantina, you can see that no one is paying attention to you anymore. Your message was clearly received. You sigh to yourself and start to eat your dinner.

Din is relaxed and is enjoying the feel of his arm around you. Every so often, his other hand finds its way to your forearm and brushes over your wrist and hand, not quite trying to holding your hand but almost just to remind you that he’s there. It’s flirtatious and romantic in a way that you both love and can’t stand because you know you just want him to keep doing it. You finish your food slowly trying to find a way to prolong this interlude as much as you can, even if it’s not real. Din notices when you’re done though and says, “Ready to head back to the Crest?” You nod at him, knowing it’s for the best and figuring he must be hungry too. You pick up the child and slide out of the booth following Din. He takes the baby from you and secures him in his satchel before reaching back to take your hand. Din threads his fingers through yours and leads you out of the cantina before the jealous eyes of all the other men who tried to claim you for their own earlier. He holds your hand all the way back to the ship and you let yourself bask in the moment, imagining the two of you as a real couple.

Once you’re back on the ship, you busy yourself with putting the child to bed. He’s already drowsy and practically asleep when you get him secure in his hammock. When you turn back around, Din is just watching you, standing there. You can’t imagine what he’s thinking. You suppose you should give him some privacy, let him have a chance to eat his own dinner, but before you do, you figure you ought to say something after all that.

“Thank you, for doing… for helping me out,” you feel rather flustered and it’s making you babble, “back there.” “I just couldn’t get those guys to bug off.”

“It was my pleasure,” he responds rather cheekily, “I figured I was going to get into a bar brawl, but I liked your idea a hell of a lot better.” He tilts his helmet at you and you can swear that you can hear the smile in his voice.

“Well, thank you, again” you say softly. He steps closer to you and you’re practically touching him as he looks down at you and says with a chuckle, “Any time you need me to feel you up again, just let me know.”

And before you can stop yourself, you blurt out, “I will.”

He laughs and tips his head down to you, “Message received.”

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#din djarin x reader #the mandalorian x reader #din djarin #din dijarin fanfiction #the mandalorian #the mandalorian fanfiction #din djarin x female reader #the mandalorian x female reader

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capstoverogers · 3 years

Text

Pick Up Games - A 90s Avengers Fic

Synopsis: In a universe where Carol Danvers stays her ass put on Earth and the entire MCU takes place during the greatest decade, I present to you: the Avengers in the 90s, playing street ball

Pairings: Carol Danvers/Maria Rambeau, BestFriends!Maria Rambeau & Sam Wilson, Implied Sam Wilson/Bucky Barnes, V Subtle BlackHill

Warnings: Allusions to the traumatizing singing animatronics at Chuck E. Cheese

Word Count: 1,156

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In 1996, Sam Wilson is always wearing his Scottie Pippen Chicago Bulls jersey.

“MJ would be nothing without Pippen,” he constantly and confidently explains to anyone who will listen. “Every Michael needs his Scottie.”

Sam thinks he’s a much better basketball player than he actually is, but he can hold his own if he can keep his trigger-happy hands from launching an unnecessary three-pointer in pick-up games. He’ll maybe make one per game (and will consider himself the next Steve Kerr because of it), but he makes up for it because he’s the absolute king of assists.

Sam and Carol Danvers lead the charge to get some S.H.I.E.L.D. agents and the Avengers together to play pick-up every Saturday morning at the closest park. Maria and Monica Rambeau always dutifully watch from the bleachers (the former acting like its her greatest weekend inconvenience, though they all know she loves it). Monica insists on bringing the boombox, acts as the official DJ as she switches back and forth between the local hip hop and classic rock stations, because Carol swears nothing gets her in the game like glam metal.

Steve Rogers can always be seen nervously pacing the sidelines (he doesn’t think it’d be fair if he and his bulging chest join the game; besides he’s always been more of a baseball kind of guy), acting as the unofficial referee, no matter how many times they explain to him that the very nature of street ball is no rules.

“I just don’t want anybody to get hurt,” he whines with a pout so unintentionally puppy-like that they can’t help but keep letting him ref.

They call Bucky Barnes “the silent assassin” because you forget he’s there until suddenly he’s dropped twenty buckets on you out of nowhere. He grumbles every time Sam smacks his ass after a good play, but they all share secret smirks at the way he also flushes.

Rambeau alternates between heckling Sam every time he bricks a shot and hollering, “Hell yeah, that’s my best friend!” whenever he does his signature fake right, dish left to a wide open Hawkeye who sinks the three or lobs a perfect ally oop to Thor for the slam dunk.

Speaking of Hawkeye, Clint Barton is absolutely useless unless he’s behind the arc. Can’t dribble worth shit, but no one’s ever seen him miss a shot. Not ever.

Natasha Romanoff doesn’t play but can always be found wearing the shortest shorts anyone’s ever seen as she lounges on the bleachers, bobbing her head to the radio and trading jokes with Monica. When the game ends, she husks out a ‘good game, boys’ until an insistent cough draws her attention to a playfully glowering Maria Hill (who is an absolute beast on defense and in the post with that delightfully long torso of hers).

Without fail, Natasha flashes her the kind of smirk that’ll make you have to gulp down an entire gatorade in one go.

“But of course as always, the ladies did it better.”

“Thank you.” That would be Carol interrupting the moment. She’s the self-proclaimed captain every week and takes pick-up games way too seriously. Peter Parker’s no longer allowed to play with them because everyone’s afraid her competitiveness with crush his tiny little earnest spirit.

Carol’s absolutely radiant when her team wins, though, immediately beelining it to the bleachers to hoist a cheering Monica onto her shoulders as she quirks an eyebrow at the girl’s pretending-not-to-be-impressed mother.

“Don’t I get something for winning?” Carol baits.

“Yeah, you get to follow this ass to the car so you can buy us lunch.”

There’s a chorus of “oooohs” and Carol pouts until Rambeau breaks down and plants a kiss on her lips. Monica scrambles off Carol’s shoulders to leap into the arms of an approaching Sam (in a frankly very dangerous maneuver that Maria side eyes with pursed lips) as they all head for the parking lot. Bruce Banner - who shows up late and smothered in sunscreen - consoles a ruddy faced Thor with an awkward pat on the back, because the God of Thunder is absolutely a sore loser.

(“These silly Midgard games have nothing on the grand arena events we’d hold on Asgard each century! There I am the undisputed champion!”)

Carol and Maria jump into their neighboring convertibles, playfully competing to see who can get Monica to ride with them until the girl proclaims “I want to ride with Uncle Sam!” Carol gapes and Maria rolls her eyes fondly as Sam triumphantly cackles.

“You raising her right, Rambeau,” Sam teases. “She knows quality when she sees it.”

Carol putting her middle finger on display in his direction just makes Sam laugh louder as he carries Monica over to his trusty blue Camry, followed a little too close by Bucky (everyone does them the courtesy of pretending not to notice). Steve throws his ham-hocked leg over his Harley, and the rest pile into Barton’s mini van (Natasha forgoes claiming her usual assumed position of shot gun to instead press her thighs against a self-satisfied Maria Hill in the backseat).

They make their way to Chuck E. Cheese for lunch because let’s be real, Monica calls the shots (and Sam honestly likes their pizza, he doesn’t care how the super soldier Brooklyn Boys give him shit for this “blasphemy”). Tony Stark, Pepper Potts and little Morgan Stark meet them there and Stark spontaneously decides to buy a birthday party package, even though it’s nowhere close to anyone’s birthday and the Chuck E. Cheese is technically already fully booked for the day. But he’s Tony Stark - like they’re really gonna say no. With a slice of pizza in one hand and a fountain coke in the other, Tony babbles on about how he could improve the animatronic technology to make it less creepy.

“I better not go into the garage later and see one of those things,” Pepper warns as she warily eyes the stuttering movements of robotic Chuck and gang as they sing an honestly not terrible cover of the Beatles “Eight Days a Week.”

Carol and Monica go on a rampage through all the games and absolutely clean out the place, earning enough tickets to win a huge Captain Marvel plushie that Carol cheekily gifts Maria (who rolls her eyes but secretly pulls out to cuddle against every time Carol’s called up to space for long periods of time) and Thor talks excitedly about the nine realms with a creature he swears he recognizes from space until Bruce has to gently point out that it’s just a human in a giant rat costume.

That night, Carol gets an AOL instant message from NicholasNotNickFury:

NicholasNotNickFury: thanks for inviting me to your little Saturday pick up games

CaptainHotStuff: but we didn’t invite you

NicholasNotNickFury: IT WAS SARCASM DANVERS

The end.

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behindheremeraldeyes · 3 years

Text

sasusaku month 2021

day 1- glances

title: I see you

summary: high school AU— they’re in the middle of biology class when Uchiha Sasuke realizes that there are way more interesting things that deserve his full attention. [Ao3] [ffnet]

He’s doing it again.

From the corner of his eyes, he can see as she eagerly writes down her notes on her biology book. She uses her small fingers to tug a stubborn strand of her pink hair that has been falling forward since first period, and he watches as the sunlight highlights her soft skin. An absent smile graces her lips, and he supposes it’s because she’s enjoying whatever it is that their teacher is saying. He hasn’t been paying attention to the class for a while now, his concentration completely switched to the girl sitting next to him. Last time he checked, though, they were discussing genetics. Or could it be fungus? He doesn’t know.

Lately, he’s been doing that a lot— the whole staring thing, that is. Though unaware, at first, now he knows exactly when his attention drifts towards her. It happens when he’s at ease or when anxiety is starting to grow inside him. When he’s calm and relaxed; or when he finds himself in need of a familiar face not to blow it all away.

Sakura has this effect on him. Even without really saying or doing anything, her sole presence is enough to warm his chest. It’s as natural as the clouds floating in the sky, and sometimes, when they’re not in the same room, he finds himself missing her figure. With her green eyes and pink hair, she has become a constant presence in his life, and if anything, Sasuke likes constant. Always has.

He also likes her, but that’s not been questioned right now.

He’s acknowledged his feelings for her for almost three months now, and he figures he’s still trying to get used to the idea of seeing her as more than just his best friend. It’s not that their relationship has changed that much from what it was before, but everything around her just feels different ever since Naruto pointed out the obvious. Sasuke has accepted this new side of him, and perhaps, the biggest change in his young life is the fact that he has to constantly remind himself that he no longer needs silly excuses to hide his feelings for her. He has to keep telling himself that it’s not an absurd for a boy like him to consider making a move in a girl like her. He can dare to reach out for her hand or— if he’s feeling bold enough, and the situation calls for it— kiss her lips.

It’s weird to even think about doing that to the girl who has been by his side since they were in dippers. She‘s still the same Sakura, but now that he has allowed himself to picture them together, she’s just different. He’s different, too, and he can’t really say he hates it. Quite the opposite, in fact.

And right now, while he’s still trapped in his thoughts, he also has to remind himself that staring at her is not as creepy as it would be if he was just a stranger.

It isn’t, right?

Perhaps he should stop, then. Or maybe—

His thoughts are suddenly interrupted as a folded piece of white paper shows up on his desk. He quirks his right brow in confusion, and without thinking twice, his eyes drift to Naruto because— well— who else would’ve thrown that at him in the middle of the class, right? However, much to his surprise, his blonde best friend couldn’t have done such a thing, no. He’s fast asleep on his desk across the classroom, and the Uchiha is almost sure he can see drool sliding down his open mouth.

That loser, he thinks. If he’s not going to pay attention to the class, he might as well try to pretend otherwise in order to avoid a future lecture. Maybe he really deserves it, after all.

Still, if the idiot didn’t throw the folded paper, then who did it?

He arcs his brows again, and before trying to reach another conclusion based solely on his speculations, Sasuke decides to read the hidden note. Carefully, then, he unfolds the paper, only to be surprised by the familiar and delicate handwriting in it.

“Shouldn’t you be paying attention to the class?”

A smirk crosses his lips as he reads those words, and he knows he’s been busted. Dark eyes, then, turn to his right only to find green ones already staring back at him. She offers him a teasing smile, using her index finger to point towards the blackboard, to which he simply shrugs. Apparently, Sakura has caught him staring for a little too long, and if he were to be honest, he’s glad she did because now he has an excuse to silently flirt with her.

Now, he has an excuse to observe and to be observed by her emerald eyes.

If he had to pick, that’s probably one of his favorite activities of the day now that he has decided to build up some courage to make a move. He likes to tease her without using words just to see all of her unique reactions flourishing. He likes to see the many shades of red that tinge her cheeks whenever she’s embarrassed and the way she sometimes has to cover her mouth to suppress a loud laugh. He likes when she bites her lower lip whenever she’s thinking about something, and he sure as hell loves it when he sees one of her soft smiles slowly making its way up to her bright eyes.

She really is the cutest girl he knows. Not that he will ever admit that to her.

Without thinking twice then, he grabs his black pen and rips a piece of paper from his notebook. He scribbles around, folds it and expertly throws it so their secret lands on her desk. She spares him a knowing look before unfolding it, and he watches as she silently grows embarrassed at his written words. Her cheeks are flushed pink, and the pout that takes over her lips is enough to tell him his silly message worked. It was just a regular compliment, but he knows she’s never been good with those ever since he called her annoying on second grade.

One would say he’s to be blamed for her complex, but he likes to think he has only helped her develop one of her unique traits.

Sakura shakes her pink head, then, and he watches as she rips another piece of paper so they can continue their sneaky conversation. They certainly look like children right now, especially since they both know they can just pick their phones from their pockets and text each other. It would be easier, sure, but not half as fun.

“Very charming. Still, you’ll need more than, that if you want my notes!” is her answer, with an exclamation mark written with a big dot on the bottom, and he pretends to be taken aback by those words. She’s still blushing, he can tell, and he feels oddly proud for that. Maybe he shouldn’t, though, because he knows she dreams of becoming a great doctor someday and she just loves biology so so much that, perhaps, he should really just leave her to her studies.

But it’s stronger than him. Having her reactions and her attention all to himself makes him selfish, and even if he hates to act differently than what he’s used to, he doesn’t complain one bit when he does that for her.

It’s all for her. All because of her.

He’s but a teenager living his first love, and that alone should give him the right to enjoy this fleeting phase next to her. People say it’s the best moment of life, and even if he doesn’t know wether it’s true or not, he’s ready to, at least, try to make the best of it.

So, yes, Sasuke is going to keep sending her notes during her favorite class if they make her smile. He’s going to keep choosing the right words to make her blush and he’s going to keep stealing glances, hoping to be caught, until the day comes when he doesn’t really have to steal anymore.

fin

——-—

a/n: okay, first of all, HAPPY SASUSAKU MONTH, y’all! Here’s to another wonderful month filled with love and sasusaku! Let’s all have fun and celebrate our beloved ship! Now, to the story... honestly, I hate it so much. I think this is one of the worst things I’ve ever written, but at least, it’s over now. Nothing came to me when working with this theme and I really just wanted to move on with this already. I thought about writing something about Sasuke making amends with his newfound love for Sakura in a high school setting, but it’s just meh. Sorry for that. It’ll get better, I promise XD Still, hope you have fun!

#sasusaku #sasusaku month 2021 #Sasusaku month #ssmonth21 #ss month #myssfics

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