#you guys actually miss illicit affairs???

[askinkiskarma]

Seeing Atan on my Tumblr page = life made, grades improved, skin cleared,,,,

NO CAUSE PEOPLE GETTING ATTACHED TO MY CHARACTERS MAKES ME VIOLENTLY SOB AND THE FACT THAT PEOPLE MISSED NETEYAM/ATAN MAKES ME EMO AS FUCK YOU DON’T GET IT BESTIES

[leclercsainzz]

hello love x

i was wondering if you could potentially do one where the reader is an actress and is in the new hunger games movies and everyone ships her with tom but she’s also dating lando … could you make a love triangle situation with these two?? like maybe she hangs out with tom more than lando or something idk lol u can come up with anything (you can decide who the endgame is) sort of like a illicit affair or where maybe she is seeing tom and everyone is aware of it idk??? (at this point im just saying nonsense i think lol)

ILLICIT AFFAIRS

PAIRINGS: lando norris x gf!reader / tom blyth x fem!reader

TYPE: social media au

WARNING: // cheating implied

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5

yourusername

liked by landonorris, tomblyth and 689,736 others

yourusername: making this movie was hands-down one of the best experiences of my life thus far! i cannot wait to share more behind the scenes content with you all:)) and with only one week to spare .. see you out there on our press tour!

view 5,846 comments

landonorris: can’t wait!

landonorris: proud of you, my love!! ❤️

↳ yourusername: ilyyyyy 😘

↳ user: lando being a supportive bf >>>

↳ user: alexa, how to get my own lando norris?? 😭

user: she’s so pretty, i can’t

user: after reading the book, i just know this movies gonna break me 😩😩😩😩

user: LANDO LET ME HAVE HER, PLEASE

user: SCREAMING!!! CANNOT WAIT!!!!

user: i have been looking forward to this movie since they announced it, can’t believe we’re only one week away

joshandresrivera: who’s the cute guy at the end??

↳ yourusername: just some guy i know 🤷🏻‍♀️

user: caNnot wait, omggggg

user: read the book and idk if i’m mentally prepared

user: you look soo good 😩😩😩

songbirdsandsnakes: our lucy gray ❤️❤️

user: i’m actually freaking tf out about this alapapalddbsod

user: YES YES YES YES YES

oscarpiastri: can i get free tickets?

↳ yourusername: absolutely!

↳ user: i love this duo so much 🤣

user: movie of the year incoming????

user: the movie hasn’t even come out yet and the amount of snow x lucy gray edits i’ve seen just from the trailer alone 😩

↳ user: i just know once the movie comes out they’ll be all over tiktok …. i can’t wait tho!!!!!!

user: i just realized that jason schwartman, viola davis, and peter dinklage are in this too!!! alwnsofnf

user: i’ve seen the trailer like 10+ times, can’t wait!!

hunterschafar: ❤️

user: will josh and jlaw be in this??

↳ user: noooo 💀 bro, this is set 64 years before them

user: she’s playing lucy gray right???

↳ user: yes

user: AHHHHHH

user: can’t wait for all the interviews omg!!!!

user: yn and the hunger games???? SIGN ME TF UPPP

user: soo excited over this

user: i wonder if lando will be attending the premiere

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 675,758 others

yourusername: last race with my favorite boyyy 🥺🧡

tagged: @landonorris

view 4,846 comments

user: LAST RACE??? WHYYY????

↳ user: she starts press tour tomorrow for the hunger games

user: ima miss seeing you in the paddock 😩

user: ima miss you in the paddock 😩 but i cannot wait for the hunger games press interviews

user: his smile 😩😩

user: my fav papayas 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡 + oscar

user: the first pic 😭😭

user: last race??? nooooooo

user: wait, im confused …. why’s she leaving???

user: gonna miss you

user: last pic 😩

user: YN?!?!!? YOURE LEAVING??!?? 😭😭😭😭😭

user: my favssssss 🧡

user: ya’ll acting as if she’s leaving forever and won’t see her again lmaooo 🤣 she’s doing press tour bc the movie she’s in comes out in a week

landonorris: 😘😘😘

landonorris: gonna miss your cute face 🥺

↳ yourusername: gonna miss you tooo, pretty boy 🥺

user: the way he smiles around her

user: wait when is she leaving???

↳ yourusername: a little after the race

↳ user: wait why tho??

↳ user: she starts press tour tomorrow since her movie comes out next week lol

oscarpiastri: that smile thoooo 🤭

user: where is she going????

user: THE best couple

user: what movie is she going for?

↳ user: the hunger games

↳ user: WAIT FRR????? is it the new one???

user: parents, frrrrr 😍

user: can’t wait for press tour, i just know she’s gonna slay

carlossainz55: pic creds to me, thank you 💁🏻‍♂️

↳ yourusername: 🙄🙄🙄 yea yea

↳ landonorris: 😘

↳ user: ynlando who??? i only know carlando ❤️🧡

user: they’re the reason i believe in love ❤️❤️

user: the way he looks at her, bro 😭😭😭

↳ user: he’s sooo in love, i can’t 😩😩

user: we won’t see ynlando for a while 😭

user: my ynlando heart 😍😍😍❤️❤️

yourusername

liked by landonorris, hunterschafer and 689,945 others

yourusername: thank you, berlin ❤️ @thehungergames

tagged: @tomblyth @hunterschafer @joshandresrivera

view 7,526 comments

user: THE REFERENCE OMG!!!!

user: MOTHER IS SERVING, OOH MYYYY 😍😍😍😍

user: he’s sooo fine!! but he looks EXTRA FINE with the buzz cut & blonde hair 😮‍💨

📌 pinned

↳ yourusername: told yaaaa @tomblyth

joshandresrivera: ohh hiiii 👋🏼

user: yn came to serve

user: tom’s the new white boy of the month!!!

user: HER PINNED COMMENT

user: tom’s soo good looking 😩

user: she’s so beautiful 😍😍

hunterschafer: WERK

↳ yourusername: are we about to kiss rn?

user: okay but why do i ship her and tom?? 🫣

user: idc what anyone says, she looks gorgeous! 😍

user: ngl but tom and yn look good together 🤷🏻‍♀️

↳ user: she’s got a bf and he’s got a gf

user: this man’s gorgeous but i also gotta remember he’s the one responsible for finnick’s death

↳ yourusername: same bestie 🥺

↳ user: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

user: okay but her and tom look soo good 😩😩

landonorris: stunning 😍

landonorris: you’re gorgeous

↳ yourusername: 😘😘😘😘

↳ user: them >>>

↳ user: missing them rn 😩😩

user: dress is gorgeous! she’s gorgeous! i just don’t like the top of the dress, if i’m being honest

tomblyth: ❤️❤️

user: cannot wait till the movie is out!!!!

user: tHe second slide and fourth slide slandnslsmd

user: oBSESSED 😩😩😩😩

user: i can already tell yn and tom are gonna be my fav duo

user: tom tho 😍

user: you look soo beautiful, i can’t 😩

user: 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

user: i’m already a simp for president snow, and the movie hasn’t even come out yet

user: TOM, OMG 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

user: THE WAY SHE PINNED THAT ONE COMMENT 😂 yn being a coriolanus simp confirmed???

user: everything about you is soo slayyyyyyyyyy

user: nothing beats the original cast but they all look sooooo good, i can’t even lie

user: the dress reference 🤩

user: PLEASE GIVE TOM MY NUMBER!!!! OR GIVE ME HIS NUMBER EITHER IS FINE WITH ME

user: is it just me or does tom look better with the buzz cut and blonde hair???

↳ yourusername: you’re not the only one 😩 ive told him several times!!!!!!

yourusername

liked by joshandresrivera, landonorris and 699,947 others

yourusername: world premiere for @thehungergames 🇬🇧

view 6,836 comments

user: THE THRID POST ALSNDKDKDMDNSN

user: i ship

user: why do they look so in love in that third slide??

joshandresrivera: 🧡

user: yn, babe, where’s lando????

user: that don’t look like lando to me 👀

user: the chemistry is INSANE 😮‍💨

landonorris: you’re killing it, babe ❤️

↳ yourusername: 😘😘 love yaa

↳ landonorris: i love you moreeee 😘

↳ user: parents 😭😭😭

user: i hope her and tom date, they look so good together

user: ya’ll gotta stop shipping tom and yn, yn’s literally dating lando and tom’s got a girlfriend

user: tom and her look so good 😩😩😩

tomblyth: love you, gorgeous ❤️

↳ yourusername: ❤️❤️

↳ user: IM SORRY WHAT??!???

↳ user: excuse me??? sir????

user: TOMS COMMENT AKALSMDN

user: the chemistry is INSANE

user: he called her gorgeous 😭😭😭 brb gonna go cry

hunterschafer: YUPPPPP

hunterschafer: serving as always!

user: MOTHER IS SERVING 😍😍😍

user: obsessed with you and tom 😍😍😍

user: if i were lando, i would be crying in a corner rn

user: why do they look like a couple in that third slide??

user: toMs’S COMMENT!! he called her gorgeous

user: ya’ll shipping her with tom as if she doesn’t have a bf

↳ user: have you ever heard of cheating??

user: ya’ll see the interview?? she called him delicious and said that it’s so easy to fall in love with him 😭😭

↳ user: she said, “and getting to work with that is delicious to an actor like me” bffr she never said anything about it being easy to fall in love with him 🙄

↳ user: actually she did proceed to talk about how easy it is to fall in love with him?????? if anything you bffr

user: @landonorris come get your girl

user: she’s so touchy with him 🙄🙄🙄🙄

user: LANDO OPEN YOUR EYES

user: we’re all thinking the same thing right?? 😏

user: they’re definitely fucking around

tomblyth

liked by yourusername, hunterschafer and 678,927 others

tomblyth: thank you, l.a. 🤩

tagged: @yourusername @joshandresrivera @hunterschafer

view 5,936 comments

user: ngl but yn and tom look cute together

user: PARENTS FRRRR 😍😍😍😍😍

user: lando & yn >>>>>

user: they have sm tension

user: ya’ll are crazy if you think yn would leave lando for tom

↳ user: and youre crazy for not thinking that maybe yn already cheated on lando with tom 🫢

user: @landonorris @landonorris @landonorris

user: lando’s busy trying to win a race while yn’s busy fooling around with tom

yourusername: SNOW FALLS ON TOP!!!

↳ user: yes, on top of you

↳ user: nahhhhh 😭😭😭

user: how’d you know about the tattoo??? 👀

yourusername: love yaaaa ❤️

↳ tomblyth: back at you! ❤️

↳ user: @landonorris

hunterschafer: cute

↳ user: how does it feel to third wheel all the time?

user: yn’s literally soo gorgeous!!! 😩

user: if i were yn, i’d be all over him too, idcccc

user: lando’s stronger than me bc if my gf was like this with another man id be going apeshit

user: they’re 100% having an affair

↳ user: ohh definitely!

↳ user: the fact that he knew about her tattoo that none of us knew about says a lot!!!! this man has explored her body

user: yntom >>> ❤️❤️❤️

user: i wonder if lando knows about the tattoo tom was referring to

↳ user: that man is clueless like the rest of us

user: @landonorris

user: not ppl tagging lando 😭😭

↳ user: he’s gottta open his eyes

↳ user: @landonorris

imessage

— author’s note: this is simply for the story, i’m aware that rachael and tom both have partners

pt2?

[softspiderling]

illicit affairs - part two | r.c

summary:

"Speaking of, why don’t you stay over tonight? It’s late, and I don’t want you walking home by yourself.”

“You’re not gonna drive me?” You asked with a pout and he rolled his eyes.

“I’m too tired, don’t make me. Just stay over.”

“What? And leave in the morning like I’m one of your hook ups? Please.”

OR; Rafe makes an outrageous suggestion and you? You give in.

pairing: rafe cameron x reader

warnings: mention of drugs, talk about sex (nothing graphic yet) but the later parts will have smut, so 18+ MDNI!

word count: 2k

author's note: pt. two out so soon?? there's gotta be smth fishy going on 🤭we finally get into the PLOT! i hope you enjoy my lovelies, don't forget to leave a comment/like/reblog or share your thoughts with me in the inbox.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

pt. two: "it's born from just one single glance"

A week after the party, it was the first Friday in a while where the four of you didn’t go to a party. After spending a day out of the sea to test out Topper’s new boat, you got picked up some pizza and settled down in Rafe’s living room, where you were still in the same spot several hours later. The empty pizza cartons were stacked on the floor and the four of you strewn out on the couch and various seats.

“You want another drink?”

Rafe was waving his empty glass in front of you, a lonely ice cube clinking in it, an expected eyebrow raised.

You squinted at him, nodding. “Can you get me a coke please?”

“Sure.”

Kelce perked up in his seat at the prospect of another drink. “Hey, can you get me another beer?”

“No,” Rafe answered, without even looking back as he left for the kitchen. “You know where the fridge is.”

“What?” Kelce muttered with a frown, looking over to you as he slumped back down. “You know where the fridge is, why is he getting you a coke?”

You only shrugged with a grin, making yourself comfortable on the couch now that you had more space, while Topper clapped Kelce on the back in consolation.

“Come on man, you know she’s his favorite.”

“Hey!”

Grabbing a pillow from the couch, you shucked it at Topper, making him yelp when it hit him square in the face.

“Don’t talk about me like I’m not right next to you,” you scowled. “And I’m not Rafe’s favorite.”

“You’re a clown if you actually believe that.”

“Fuck you, you’re a clown.”

Topper tossed the pillow back at you, narrowly missing your head by an inch and the pillow fell to the floor behind the couch, landing just in front of Rafe’s feet as he returned.

“I was gone for five minutes, what are you guys fighting about now?”

“Precious over here thinks she’s not your favorite.”

You glowered at the other two boys, while Rafe settled back on the couch next to you, pressing a can of coke into your hands. He took a sip of his drink, eyeing you briefly and shrugged, pursing his lips in agreement.

“Nah, you’re definitely my favorite.”

You stuck your tongue out at Topper when he gave you a knowing look, instead focusing on opening your coke. “Whatever. It doesn’t mean anything, you two shitheads don’t make it hard for me to be anyone’s favorite.”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” Kelce grunted with a frown and you raised a brow at him.

“You literally had sex in Rafe’s bed last year,” you said, before turning your attention to Topper. “And you’re still obsessed with Sarah.”

Rafe let out a noise, making clear that he was fully agreeing with you. “What she said.”

Topper, while satisfied he had proven his point, still rolled his eyes and Kelce crossed his arms, annoyed.

“I hate it when they team up like this.”

“Shut up and get your beer.”

The next couple of hours passed easily, just as it always did when the four of you came together to talk shit. While you did enjoy going to parties every now and then, you really appreciated just hanging out with your friends and talking about everything and nothing in the safety of the four walls of Rafe’s home.

Only you and your boys. Just the way you liked it.

“Alright, I think it’s time for me to go,” Topper said, breaking up the group with a yawn, shaking his head to stay awake as he sat up. “I’m beat.”

“Can you give me a ride?” Kelce asked, standing up and Topper nodded, turning to you.

“Do you need me to drop you off too?”

You stretched your arms, legs long draped over Rafe’s lap as you laid lengthwise on the couch. It was nearing one am and you really should make your way home, but you were far too comfortable to move, having spent most of the day in the sun, which was catching up to you now.

“I think I might stay for a while longer, thanks though.”

Topper clicked his tongue, ruffling your hair, messing it up for good measure as he and Kelce said their good byes, their voices getting quieter as they strolled to the front, the door shutting in its hinges. It wasn’t long after until you could heard Topper’s truck start, and then pull off the estate grounds.

Finally, it was quiet enough for you to hear the music, which was drowned out by Kelce’s constant yapping. You loved him but he was such a chatter box when he drank beer.

“Isn’t Sarah coming home tonight?” you asked into the sudden quietness, combing through your hair with your fingers, trying to get rid of the knots that have formed since you’d laid on the couch for the whole night. The estate had been quiet apart from the four of you causing raucous in the living room.

“Please,” Rafe scoffed. “She’s staying with John B more nights than not, I’m this close to kicking her out for real.”

“Oh come on,” you laughed, leaning up to shove his arm a little. “She’s in love. Leave her alone. And don’t act like you don’t enjoy being the man of the house and having it all to yourself.”

Rafe grinned to himself, shrugging his shoulders a bit like you weren’t absolutely right. Like you said, you knew him. “Eh. Maybe. House tends to get a little quiet sometimes... Speaking of, why don’t you stay over tonight? It’s late, and I don’t want you walking home by yourself.”

“You’re not gonna drive me?” You asked with a pout and he rolled his eyes.

“I’m too tired, don’t make me. Just stay over.”

“What? And leave in the morning like I’m one of your hook ups? Please.”

“Give me a break,” Rafe huffed. “You know damn well you’re not one of my hook ups. They don’t get to stay till the morning,” he paused, turning his head to look at you inquisitively, and you knew that look all too well. He was about to be nosy. “What about yours, anyways?”

“My what?”

“Your hook ups, precious. Haven’t seen anyone around since Jack.”

You shrugged. “Cuz there wasn’t anyone else since Jack, you know that. And he wasn’t a hook up, he was my boyfriend.”

He was quiet, but you could basically hear the gears in his head turning. “I know you’re not into hook ups and shit, but don’t you need to get off sometimes?”

“And risk hooking up with weirdos like Moany? No thank you. I don’t need anyone else to get off.”

Rafe rolled his eyes. “I know, jesus. I’m just saying… Sex by yourself isn’t as good as sex with another person. If you know what they like. Not everyone has freaky requests like Monique. And if you’re compatible, you know the sex can be insane.”

You eyed him suspiciously, not sure if you liked which direction this was going. He wasn’t about to suggest the two of you having sex…. Right? Because that would be just crazy.

“… jus’ getting sick of having to get to know a new girl every time, ‘s exhausting.”

“You know you can have sex with a person more than once right?”

Rafe scoffed, leaning his hands behind his head. “Yeah, but then they start getting comfortable. I don’t need that right now.”

You waved your hands around, trying to stop Rafe’s train of thought before it could get any further.

“Rafe, stop beating around the bush. The fuck are you on right now?”

He swirled his drink around, downing the last of it before shoving the glass on the table, looking at you.

“What if… We fucked?”

“What?” you stared at him incredulously, like he had just grown a second head.

“I mean, not relationship wise. Casual. Friends with benefits.”

“Friends with benefits,” you echoed, dryly. “Are you insane?”

Rafe scoffed, shaking his head at you, not bothering with a reply. You thought that was the end of it, trying to calm your heart down, as it was nearly jumping out of your throat, when you felt Rafe’s hand splaying across your bare legs. His fingers brushed your inner thigh, making you tense and you glared up at him.

“Seriously Rafe?”

“Seriously Rafe?” Rafe mocked you, reaching out to tuck your hair behind your ear, the other hand starting to trace circles into the skin of your thigh, like it was the most normal thing for him to do. “We both know that if you didn’t want me touching you, you’d have kicked me half ways across the room already.”

You wanted to protest, but your words died halfway down your tongue, knowing it was no use with the way Rafe was looking at you. Also, he was a 100% right. Turning away, you stared at the ceiling, trying to ignore how his finger tips left your skin tingling, thinking of the most random things to calm yourself down.

There was no use of lying to yourself, a part of you wanted to say yes.

You knew Rafe didn’t do relationships, has never had a girlfriend in all the years you’d been friends. What if being friends with benefits was the closest thing you could be for Rafe? Not only his best friend, but a step further? What if this was all you could get with him?

“This is a bad idea.”

“Why?”

“You’re my best friend.”

“Exactly. You’re my best friend, I don’t have to tell you anything because you know exactly what I like and what I don’t.”

“Not when it comes to sex!”

“Okay okay, calm down, I was just making a suggestion.”

Rafe trailed off, dropping the topic, his fucking hand still on your thigh. He wasn’t looking at you, but you could tell that he was biting back a grin, and you hated to think that you were going to give in.

“We’re not telling anyone, you hear me? Not a single soul. Especially not Top and Kelce, they would never let us live this down.”

He turned his head, the corner of his mouth ticking up knowingly. He was your best friend after all, he knew what to say to convince you of his argument. “Those two knuckleheads don’t need to know everything we do,” Rafe said as he leaned in, but you stopped him halfway, your hand on his chest.

“If this affects our friendship in any way, or or…. If it gets awkward or someone… Just, we stop, okay? No lying to get your dick wet.”

“Have I ever lied to you, precious?”

“Uh, yes. Remember when you, Top and Kelce snuck into my gard- oomph.”

Your sentence was cut short when Rafe pressed his lips against you in a soft kiss, his hand cupping the back of the neck. He pulled away, his breath hot on your face. Your lips parted a bit, shock coursing through your veins. You had wondered how it would feel to kiss Rafe for so long, and you had to admit, that the real deal was so much better than anything you could’ve imagined.

“You talk too much,” he mumbled against your lips and you rolled your eyes, brought out of your haze. This was still Rafe. Your best friend.

“Shut up.”

Fisting his shirt, you pulled him closer to you, lips hot as they interlocked. He leaned forward, both of his knees bracketing your waist, one hand moving from the back of your neck to the front, so he could cup your face. Suddenly, you were surrounded by him and if you weren’t so distracted by Rafe’s tongue slipping into your mouth, you’d be freaking out right now. This felt like a fever dream; your hands moving automatically down his torso, sneaking under his shirt, nails grazing his chiseled abs and when Rafe let out a honest to god whimper, you knew you were done for.

There was no going on back.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

author's note: am i sorry about the cliffhanger? ask me later👀

[beforeimdeceased]

I’m actually in LOVE with crybaby!!! It’s so good😫😫😫

CRYBABY! - (E.W) PT8, FINAL PART!

pairing: mean/cruel ellie x sensitive/emotional reader.

synopsis: you weren’t you anymore.

a/n: it’s so over…thank you all for the love you’ve shown crybaby! i’m happy to say i’m actually proud of something i’ve written, for the first time in a long time. thank you for reading and for all your comments and support! tags: @skylerwhitwyo

you’re a crisis of my faith

masterlist.

you weren’t you anymore. you weren’t you when abby opened the door to find you and ellie tangled together in an illicit affair. you weren’t you when you looked into her eyes, saw the pain and agony, and asked her if she didn’t mind closing the door. that you were busy doing something.

you weren’t you because you didn’t chase after her when she left. because you didn’t apologize, you just went on as you were. forgetting. you went on forgetting all the way home in her car. melting the pain away, filling the silence with meaningless conversation she was too upset to engage in. knuckles white while she gripped the steering wheel.

you’re not yourself.

at first it was fun to let go with ellie. she liked that you didn’t care anymore. that you could joke around with each other. that she didn’t have to walk on eggshells with you. or atleast, that’s how she felt. until she was missing you on tour one night.

alone in a bar, waiting for dina and jesse, she came across someone that looked as doe eyed as you used to be. her heart started to sink when she skipped over.

another bar, years ago. when you’d caught her after another show in which she’d made a mistake. you came to her with flowers from a fan and a note. “hey ellie this is—“

“fuck i’m such a fucking idiot.” she blurts. you sigh, anticipating a string of curses and insults, but she sees the note and the flowers. “what’s this?”

“it’s a note from a fan, she didn’t get to catch you before you ran off.”

she holds her hand out and you place the piece of paper in it. standing as you hold the flowers. watching her read it.

this is the first concert i’ve been to in a while and i just want to say thank you so much. i struggle a lot with social anxiety and big crowds and stuff but i really wanted to see you. i’ve been a fan since i found your guy’s cover of take on me on soundcloud and it struck a deep chord within me. you’re amazing, you know that, but i just wanted to tell you that. just in case you forget.

— your biggest fan

you hand her the flowers, pretending not to see her tears. pretending not to feel teary eyed yourself. because you’d never seen her sad cry. you’ve seen her angry cry plenty of times, but never fix her face into a frown and let the strains of tears overflow. you look away as sadness fills the space between you.

“you’re ellie williams right?” the doe eyed girl brings her back to the present. she nods. “in the flesh.”

it only took a couple drinks and ellie’s charms to lure her away from the crowded area. nestled in the corner of the bar, ellie latching her mouth onto the girls neck. imagining your body in place of hers. pretending her moans were yours. wishing that she was you.

she’d felt dirty after she finished, a feeling that was entirely new to her. you both weren’t obligated to only be with each other after that night in the bathroom, but she couldn’t get you out of her mind. maybe it was because the girl reminded her of you? then she remembered that you weren’t like that anymore. that you had completely changed.

when tour ended and the group returned home, you took it upon yourself to throw a party. the old you would have gone for a small get together at your house, with the three of them and donuts, but the new you was leaning towards some club soirée.

you were excited to show everyone more of the new you. a new style to match your new personality. a new way of living to replace your old one. completely killing the girl you’d been before.

you met them at dina and jesse’s place, ensuring you’d be there the second they got off the tour bus. excitedly rushing over to give them a hug, and ellie an awkward handshake. they look you up and down, taking in your changed appearance with concern. “new clothes?” jesse speaks up.

“new me.” you shrug, helping them carry their bags up.

when everything is settled in, they all grab a seat on the couch. you slump into their loveseat, sighing. “so there’s this party...”

dina shakes her head. “no no absolutely not. i love you, but god we’re exhausted. no party tonight.”

“it’s tomorrow. it’s your welcome back party.” the corner of your mouth twitches. “i want to sleep for atleast a week.” dina huffs. “i need to go shower right now actually.” she gets up, placing a kiss on your forehead when she passes by. jesse does the same, following behind her.

you don’t take offense to it. this might’ve hurt you a little bit in the past, feeling stupid for planning a party when it’d make sense that they want to rest. now, you didn’t care. you could party by yourself. you could party with ellie.

you look over at her, and she looks like a wounded stray. like she’s guilty of something she didn’t do. you get up and join her in place of the lovebirds. a wide smile on your face. “are you gonna come to the party?”

she breathes. “maybe. i don’t know yet.”

it’s silent for a beat. you pull out your phone and she remembers the day she took it. the agony in your voice when you were asking for it back. the day she made you cry. she shakes away the thought.

“how about we play a game?”

the peace you were experiencing in the moment felt foreign. it’s been years since you had a chance to have quality time with ellie. without her ruining it, ofcourse. it was almost like those first few weeks back when you met. playing all the board games lodged in the bookshelf of jesse’s parent’s place. before him and dina had moved in together.

these were those very same games. monopoly, sorry, connect four, and more. you settled on connect floor, crisscrossing your legs on the floor. she joins you, getting comfortable.

“i’ll keep score!” you offer, going to your phone’s notes. before you can do much about it, you realize that it’s shutting off because the battery is low. you lodge it into your back pocket and shrug, grabbing an empty envelope off of the couples counter. “my phones dead, i’ll just write it.”

then you’re making a t chart, and ellie feels as if all the air is being kicked out of her lungs. your handwriting is the same as the one that was on that letter.

but that can’t be true, right? this is the same fan who’s been writing her for years. this is handwriting that’s been on signs held up at shows. the handwriting on a small cluster of loyal groupie’s handmade tshirts.

but surely she’d have noticed this before. you’d written in front of her before, right? memories were fuzzily being put back together in the moment. your unfiltered and unconditional love for her. your kindness that you’d extended even when she was mean to you. even when she was cruel.

even when you’d had enough of the tear filled nights and decided you needed time away. you still asked how ellie was, she could hear it on the other side of the fucking phone. when you were talking to dina and jesse. when you were communicating love through them to her.

you called all those rehab centers to get her help, that’s how jesse had found one so fast. you left her meds on the table for her the next morning, not dina. it was your voice telling her she’d had enough. it was you, being brave enough to take her verbal lashings because you knew if she didn’t take it out on you, she would take it out on herself.

it was you, it was always you. she was remembering now.

“ellie?”

you look away from the paper to find her crying. crying because the you that was always there, had slipped between her nimble fingers. had melted into the cracks of hatred. she was crying because she realized why she was feeling out of sorts. she hadn’t gotten a letter this week.

a letter from—well, you.

she wanted to yell at you. to scream at you. to call you stupid for staying around when you know how she is. she wanted to curse herself for getting you to let your guard down with a fake apology, and fucking it up all over again. for pushing you past your breaking point.

“i don’t wanna play anymore.” she felt disgusting. she felt like she was going to be sick. “ellie what’s the matter—“

she’s hyperventilating now, watching as you slowly slide towards her. extending your arms while you try to catch her in a hug. she thought back to the days she called you useless. called you pathetic. called you a crybaby.

you hold her, and it’s the first time she’s ever truly felt held. the first time she’s in your arms and she’s sober. the first time she’s in your arms and she feels sorry. truly, terribly sorry.

you pull her in closer to you, turning her onto her side so you can rub your thumb across her cheek. wiping some of her tears away. she begins to cry even harder, but you don’t push her away. even when your pants are soaked and snotty. you let her lay there, and cry into you.

[enemiestoanchors]

i love you (but I cannot survive you) — a thiam playlist

i. All I Want | Kodaline

'Cause you brought out the best of me, a part of me I'd never seen. You took my soul and wiped it clean; our love was made for movie screens.

ii. The Killer Was a Coward | Dermot Kennedy

And when I think of you, I think of spirit defined, and I think of all the love that we shared in a very dark time.

iii. Demons | Imagine Dragons

Don't wanna let you down, but I am hell-bound. Though this is all for you, don't wanna hide the truth.

iv. Take on the World | You Me At Six

And nobody knows you the way that I know you; we'll fight, we'll crawl into the night. I won't let go; with you by my side, the calm, the storm, we'll face it all.

v. Eyes on Fire | Blue Foundation

And just in time, in the right place, steadily emerging with grace.

vi. I Found | Amber Run

And I found love where it wasn't supposed to be, right in front of me.

vii. Litost | X Ambassadors

And how long must I stay? Will I lay by your side just to say that I'm yours and you'll never be mine?

viii. Another Love | Tom Odell

And if somebody hurts you, I wanna fight, but my hands been broken, one too many times, so I'll use my voice, I'll be so fucking rude.

ix. Fortnight | Taylor Swift; Post Malone

And I love you; it's ruining my life.

x. The Show | Niall Horan

Life is like a board game some of the time; mistakes and heartbreaks are no crime, but there's a lot creeping through under broken skies.

xi. Guilty as Sin | Taylor Swift

What if the way you hold me is actually what's holy? If long-suffering propriety is what they want from me, they don't know how you've haunted me so stunningly.

xii. Us | James Bay

I still hear the howling, I still feel the rush; over the riots, above all the noise, and through all the worry, I still hear your voice.

xiii. Fade | Lewis Capaldi

That I'd end up so caught up in need of your demons that I'd be lost without you leading me astray. Guess I'm such a fucking fool for the way that you caught me.

xiv. Saturdays | Louis Tomlinson

My heart might be broken, but I won't be broken down.

xv. Fine Line | Harry Styles

You've got my devotion, but man, I can hate you sometimes.

xvi. The Great War | Taylor Swift

It turned into something bigger. Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed.

xvii. Holding On To Heartache | Louis Tomlinson

I called you twice, but then regretted it and changed my number.

xviii. Hoax | Taylor Swift

My only one, my kingdom come undone, my broken drum; you have beaten my heart. Don't want no other shade of blue but you; no other sadness in the world would do.

xix. I miss you, I'm sorry | Gracie Abrams

Nothing happened in the way I wanted; every corner of this house is haunted.

xx. my tears ricochet | Taylor Swift

And I can go anywhere I want, anywhere I want, just not home. And you can aim for my heart, go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones.

xxi. favorite crime | Olivia Rodrigo

I defended you to all my friends, and now, every time a siren sounds, I wonder if you're around 'cause you know that I'd do it all again.

xxii. Somebody to Die For | Hurts

And there's no hell that he can show me that's deeper than my pride 'cause I will never be forgotten. Forever, I'll fight.

xxiii. So High School | Taylor Swift

No one's ever had me, not like you...Truth, dare, spin bottles, you know how to ball; I know Aristotle.

xxiv. Complex | Katie Gregson-MacLeod

I need him like water; he thinks that I'm alright. I'm not feeling human; I think he's a good guy, but it's complex. It's a complex.

xxv. Ghost Of You | 5 Seconds of Summer

So I drown it out like I always do. Dancing through our house with the ghost of you, and I chase it down, with a shot of truth, that my feet don't dance like they did with you.

xxvi. Give Me Love | Ed Sheeran

Give me love like never before 'cause lately I've been craving more and it's been a while, but I still feel the same.

xxvii. illicit affairs | Taylor Swift

And you know damn well, for you, I would ruin myself a million little times.

xxviii. Holding On And Letting Go | Ross Copperman

It's everything you wanted, it's everything you don't.

xxix. Atlantis | Seafret

Now all the birds have fled, the hurt just leaves me scared.

xxx. Hurricane | Fleurie

Though I am breaking down again, I am aching now to let you in.

xxxi. You and I | PVRIS

We can meet in the middle, bodies and souls collide. Dance in the moonlight when all the stars align.

xxxii. Crazy in Love - Remix | Beyonce

I'm not myself. Lately, I'm foolish; I don't do this. I've been playing myself, baby I don't care.

xxxiii. this is me trying | Taylor Swift

And maybe I don't quite know what to say, but I'm here in your doorway.

xxxiv. Can't Catch Me Now | Olivia Rodrigo

You can't catch me now, I'm coming like a storm into your town.

xxxv. Perfect | Hedley

I'm not perfect, but I keep trying 'cause that's what I said I would do from the start.

xxxvi. Til My Heart Stops | Too Far Moon

I almost died the day I lost you; I'll keep breathing til my heart stops.

xxxvii. The Alchemy | Taylor Swift

There was no chance, trying to be the greatest in the league. Where's the trophy? He just comes running over to me.

xxxviii. The Exit | Conan Gray

Feels like we had matching wounds, but mine's still black and bruised, and yours is perfectly fine now. Feels like we buried alive something that never died.

xxxix. Don't Forget About Me | CLOVES

Lost through time, and that's all I need: so much love, then one day buried. Hope you're safe, 'cause I Iay you leaves; is there more than we can see?

xl. Hurts Like Hell | Fleurie

I don't want them to know the way I loved you; I don't think they'd understand it, no. I don't think they would accept me, no. I loved, and I loved, and I lost you.

xli. Is There Somewhere | Halsey

'Cause I clutched your arms like stairway railings, and you clutched my brain and eased my ailing.

xlii. Burn with You | Lea Michele

We're not healthy, barely breathing, but this pain keeps my heart beating.

xliii. Cringe | Matt Maeson

Lover, come hold me; could you forget? That I got a secret, digging a ditch.

xliv. Him & I | G-Eazy; Halsey

We got that love, the crazy kind. I am his, and he is mine, in the end, it's him and I.

xlv. An Evening I Will Not Forget / Furthest Thing | Dermot Kennedy

Days with nothing but laughing loud underneath my coat, when you tap my shoulder, hold my hand; nights with nothing but dark in there, you could be my armor then.

xlvi. Call It What You Want | Taylor Swift

You don't need to save me, but would you run away with me?

xlvii. I'll Never Love Again | Lady Gaga

And I want to pretend that it's not true, oh baby, that you're gone 'cause my world keeps turning, and turning, and turning, and I'm not moving on.

xlviii. This Town | Niall Horan

And I know that it's wrong that I can't move on, but there's something about you. If the whole world was watching, I'd still dance with you.

xlix. Without Fear | Dermot Kennedy

And now I really think you're heaven-sent 'cause you've been forcin' all these hollow hearts to feel again. And now I really think you're heaven-sent, but there's a beauty in being broken; I've been seein' it.

l. Waiting Room | Phoebe Bridgers

Know it's for the better.

li. Only Love Can Hurt Like This | Paloma Faith

Burning hot through my veins, love is torture; makes me more sure only love can hurt like this.

lii. Still Falling For You | Ellie Goulding

And just like that, all I breathe, all I feel, you are all for me, I'm in.

liii. Daylight | Taylor Swift

I once believed love would be burning red, but it's golden.

liv. Margaret | Lana Del Rey; Bleachers

'Cause when you know, you know.

lv. Lost Without You | Freya Ridings

You were the only safe haven that I've known; hits me at full speed, feel like I can't breathe and nobody knows this pain inside me.

lvi. I Fell In Love With The Devil | Avril Lavigne

Got me playin' with fire, baby, hand me the lighter. Tastes just like danger, chaotic anger.

lvii. Million Reasons | Lady Gaga

I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away, but baby, I just need one good one to stay.

lviii. But Daddy I Love Him | Taylor Swift

No, I'm not coming to my senses; I know he's crazy, but he's the one I want.

lix. Ultraviolet | Freya Ridings

No, I can't hide it, and you're reading all of me.

lx. Sunday | Dermot Kennedy

You're one of few, boy, who can safely say they had somebody truly love them back.

lxi. golden hour | JVKE; Ruel

You know nothing compares to the shattering feeling I get, oh, when you're not right there.

lxii. Daylight | David Kushner

You and I drink the poison from the same vine. Oh, I love it, and I hate it at the same time.

lxiii. Half Hearted | We Three

The fighting is done, and nobody's won, so now I'm just laying here in pieces on the floor.

lxiv. Always Remember Us This Way | Lady Gaga

So when I'm all choked up, but I can't find the words every time we say goodbye, baby, it hurts.

lxv. Latch | Sam Smith

Now I've got you in my space; I won't let go of you. Got you shackled in my embrace, I'm latching on to you.

lxvi. Say Don't Go | Taylor Swift

'Cause you kiss me, and it stops time, and I'm yours, but you're not mine.

lxvii. Put A Little Love On Me | Niall Horan

When the lights come up and there's no shadows dancing, I look around as my heart is collapsing 'cause you're the only one I need.

lxviii. Ho Hey | The Lumineers

I belong with you; you belong with me; you're my sweetheart.

lxix. XO | John Mayer

Your heart is glowing, and I'm crashing into you.

lxx. Strange Love | Halsey

Everybody wants to know about how it felt to hear you scream; they know you walk like you're a God, they can't believe I made you weak.

lxxi. You Mean The World To Me | Freya Ridings

And it kills me that you might not know after all, 'cause I know I don't let you see, but you mean the world to me, and I know that I can be pretty mean, but you mean the world to me.

lxxii. Dark Paradise | Lana Del Rey

Love you forever can't be wrong; even though you're not here, you won't move on. That's how we played it.

lxxiii. Oceans | Seafret

I want you, and nothing comes close to the way I need you. I wish I could feel your skin and I want you from somewhere within.

lxxiv. The Archer | Taylor Swift

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put me together again 'cause all of my enemies started out friends; help me hold onto you. I've been the archer; I've been the prey. Who could ever leave me, darling? But who could stay?

lxxv. MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT | Loveless

In the middle of the night, just call my name; I'm yours to tame.

lxxvi. Train Wreck | James Arthur

You can say what you like 'cause see, I would die for you. I'm down on my knees, and I need you to be my God, be my help, be a savior who can unbreak the broken.

lxxvii. Walls | Louis Tomlinson

For every question, why, you were my because.

lxxviii. Infinity | Jaymes Young

'Cause you're the reason I believe in fate, you're my paradise, and I'll do anything to be your love or be your sacrifice.

lxxix. Salvation | Gabrielle Aplin

Just a trick of light to bring me back again, those wild eyes, a psychedelic silhouette. I never meant to fall for you, but I was buried underneath, and all that I could see was white.

lxxx. Sleep On The Floor | The Lumineers

Take all your savings out 'cause if we don't leave this town, we might never make it out. I was not born to drown, baby; come on.

lxxxi. Castle on the Hill | Ed Sheeran

I still remember these old country lanes when we did not know the answers.

lxxxii. The Other Side | Ruelle

I don't want to know what it's like to live without you; don't want to know the other side of a world without you.

lxxxiii. Angel With A Shotgun | The Cab

They say before you start a war, you better know what you're fighting for. Well, baby, you are all that I adore; if love is what you need, a solider, I will be.

lxxxiv. Black Friday | Tom Odell

You look so pretty, pretty like the wind. Every time you touch me, I feel adrenaline.

lxxxv. Die With A Smile | Lady Gage, Bruno Mars

So I'ma love you every night, like it's the last night, like it's the last night. If the world was ending, I'd wanna be next to you.

lxxxvi. Northern Attitude | Noah Kahan

If I get too close and I'm not how you hoped, forgive my northern attitude. Oh, I was raised out in the cold. If the son doesn't rise until summertime, forgive my northern attitude. Oh, I was raised on little light.

lxxxvii. "Slut!" | Taylor Swift

Half awake, takin' your chance. It's a big mistake; I said, "It might blow up in your pretty face." I'm not saying, "Do it anyway," but you're going to.

lxxxviii. Backroads | Lonely The Brave

So the sinners stopped, and the villains turned, and I'll be the sky, and you be the bird.

lxxxix. Angel By The Wings | Sia

Oh, so, your wounds, they show. I know you have never felt so alone. But hold on, head up, be strong.

lxxxx. Too Deep | Ritual, Delilah

You said my signs were vital, that every touch was tidal. You held me, you held me so right, you held me so tight.

[queerwhohatesithere]

i’m convinced question…? is queer. assuming the narrator is taylor so we’ll say it’s a girl singing about a girl. i see it as her asking someone else a question while actually singing about her own experience, ex, have you ever done anything like i have? maybe she’s talking to a guy who misses a girl. she sings, “before you painted my nights a color i’ve searched for ever since.” this is reminiscent of illicit affairs colors she can’t see with anyone else. (genius lyrics agrees.) this is very queer, that her life got painted with color by this special someone and now she’s searching for it. she also asks, “did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room, and every single one of your friends was making fun of you?” now why do would their friends be making fun of them? it could just be normal friends things, or it could be them being surprised to see two girls kissing, and then once they get over their initial shock them clapping. clapping after a kiss is something you’d do for a big event, sometimes people feel the need to do it to express their support. it seems more likely with a queer pair that their friends would want to backpedal and show they were just just lightheartedly teasing. or maybe the clapping is making fun of them as well, because next taylor asks what happens next?

“did you leave her house in the middle of the night? oh did you wish you put up more of a fight? oh” she left in the middle of the night, embarrassed, wishing she’d stood up for herself more, wishing she’d stood up for her girlfriend more. “do you wish you could still touch her?” queer people have to fight to be together. it’s a struggle. we face a lot of stigma from friends and family. sometimes we end up having to give up. this narrator might be looking back wishing she had tried harder. the line about “fuckin politics and gender roles” sticks out to me as well. if the world was different, maybe things would be different. she’s also upset seeing her with a “dickhead guy.”

she also says “and what’s that that i heard, that you’re still with her, that’s nice i’m sure that’s what’s suitable” suitable is in interesting choice of words. almost like she wasn’t the right fit not for lack of passion or love but bc she didn’t fit the right image. i’m assuming this means the girl ended up with the dickhead guy?

there’s a lot of sensuality in this song. you really feel as though the narrator wishes she fought for this girl and misses her and is dying to see her again and wishes she could touch her again. “it’s just a question” but the answer to all of these questions, time and time again seems to be yes. she’s replaying the past in her head, having a conversation with herself.

anyways taylor’s songs are and always have been super layered and detailed, i think there’s a lot of different meanings to them. i really love this song and i feel like it screams gay vibes.

[shinycollarboneapologist]

i think you may have already kinda talked about this, but maybe while matty and taylorverse!reader are split she gets into a pr kinda relationship with a musician or costar and matty doesn’t know that it’s pr so he’s under the assumption she moved on and it’s just killing him that they still haven’t made up and she’s already in a relationship so he can’t do anything about his (all these) feelings he’s got

OOOOOOF. like illicit affairs but 10x worse because they haven’t spoken in weeks and you don’t owe him an explanation. the first he hears of it is through the grapevine, an overheard conversation while he’s talking to some mutual friends. your name is mentioned and he has to do everything in his power to not light up when he hears it. the lights in his eyes are dimmed though when he hears the context. apparently you had been seen out and about with andrew, had taken him to a party he had missed, had been seen with him a few times doing the same mundane things matty wishes he could’ve done with you. he knew that when you said things were over between the two of you that you meant it, but seeing those thoughts come into fruition, seeing you actually moving on, felt like a knife was held to his throat and someone was applying entirely too much pressure.

he wishes there would’ve been some kind of warning, something along the lines of you saying “hey i’ve moved on,” so he could stop the onslaught of thoughts about you that plagued his entire existence. matty feels your absence more when he’s home, knowing that you could possibly be in your london flat only a few minutes away from him. the thought of someone replacing him and giving you more than he ever did makes his stomach flip and throat feel tight. his suspicions are confirmed when he sees pictures of andrew leaving your london residence early in the morning wearing the same clothes he was photographed in from the party the night before.

he wants you to call him and tell him it’s all a lie and some stupid pr move for a movie. but you’re in your off season and as far as he knows there’s nothing new coming out for either of you. he feels sick.

matty has never been one for tabloids, especially on seeing the way they wreaked havoc on his family in his younger years. yet he finds himself on those lewd websites and social media pages refreshing to see if there’s anything new; hopeful for a groundbreaking break up story with your name in the headlines. it never comes. instead he’s left with pictures of you loved up in new york, london, paris, italy. all over the globe with this guy that wasn’t him but was doing a hell of a good job of filling his shoes.

the pictures with you both and taylor set him off. they weren’t posed, they look authentic. and you wouldn’t bring your pr boyfriends around taylor. he knows that. (or at least he thinks that) you’re both spotted at her nashville condo, her place in new york. you’re leaving the restaurant with her and he’s finding it hard to look away at the grainy pictures of you kissing this man on the street.

had he done a little more, matty could be the one filling his own shoes, stepping up to the title role and being able to call himself yours. he had never done that before, not in hushed whispers or late night calls. you always called yourself his though, and whether it was just to fuel his ego or you actually meant it- well he’ll never get the answer to that now. he just wishes he could’ve done more, fought harder.

yet know he’s left to extinguish the own fire burning in his chest, alone and swallowing down bile as he stares at the unsent message to you in his phone.

“i’m sorry.”

[chaos0pikachu]

tinhats are so fucking funny to me cause like, what makes y’all special? what makes your tinhat ship conspiracy special or different from all the others? what makes y’alls the exception? 

I’ve been around alright. I’ve been around since the beginning days of tinhatting on the internet alright? I was there to see the aftermath of fans stalking elijah wood to a gay club thinking he was in an illicit affair with Merry from lotr okay? I remember the LJ anon threads dedicated DEDICATED to rumors and theories that Jared pada-whatever and Jensen Ackles were in a super secret brokeback mountain style relationship. I witnessed meltdowns from bandom tinhats and even the lesser knowns of when folks thought adam lambert had a thing for the mormon guy on american idol. I even witnessed the het ones the rare but just as wilding het tinhats who thought kerry washington’s baby was gonna come out looking like timothee chalamet b/c she was oh so obviously having an affair with her white costar. i’ve read the lamentations of the outlander actress who still to this day gets told by fans her marriage is fake and had one contact the church to prove her wedding wasn’t real. why the fuck the hets are hiding their ultra secret relationships we’ll never know but they are! I was there to witness the absolutely mental DECLINE of larrys when one of them 1d boys had a baby, read shit like how women can’t wear leggings after giving birth, to the baby being a doll (side shoutout to larries for still going after all these years). i’ve read all about how jimin is clearly boinking jungkook - wait actually that’s a LIE and front by bighit b/c jungkook is ACTUALLY in a relationship with V obviously omg how can you miss THE SIGNS

I’ve seen it all children

[freyaswolf]

For years, I lived in bewildered befuddlement regarding the musical musings of Taylor Swift. I usually listen to rock or metal, so her brand of pop was not a part of my usual lineup. However, I gained lovely friends here on Tumblr who swear by our Lady TayTay, so I decided I should check out her stuff. But there was SO MUCH, I didn't even know where to start. Luckily, my dearest mutual and actual friend, @idontgettechnology , took pity on me and made me the most amazing playlist to get me started. She titled it Taylor Swift 101, with a description of "Class is is session bish".

I spent today working my way through it, and it was a revelation! I took notes, cause that's what you're supposed to do in class, so here are my highlights from the 56 song playlist. I know I'm missing out on years of lore regarding TSwift, but I'm eager to learn. After a few more listens I may even be ready for the 201 level of this class lol

Notes below the cut, to save your scrolling thumb 😜

Ok, here we go! (I'm pretty sure these are in the intended order, and mostly these are first impressions)

1. Fifteen: wow, this took me straight back to highschool!

2. Teardrops on my Guitar: yep, I'm already hooked

3. Fearless: UGH!!!!

4. Tied Together with a Smile: FUCK!

5. Whitehorse: Holy shit!

6. Cold as You: DAMN!!!

7. You Belong with Me: (SCREAMING) I'm officially invested!

8. Stay Beautiful: 😍😍😍

9. That's The Way I Loved You: FUUUUUUCK!!!

10. Come Back, Be Here: I'm dead over this one ☠️

11. Sparks Fly: EHRMEHGHERD!!!

12. All Too Well: DUUUUUDE!!! I think this is about Jake Gyllenhaal? Also, OOOUUUUUCCCHHH, I can feel her pain!

13. Dear John: EW! Girl, he's a toxic ass narcissist! Babygirl, you need to ditch those boys, get you a girlfriend instead. I volunteer as tribute, or I would if I wasn't too old and boring lol

14. I Almost Do: 🥺🥺🥺🥺

15. Enchanted: Oh the feels!!! Also, my personal head canon is that this is about Chris Evans 😜

16. Red: oh boy, have I been here!

17. Long Live: THIS IS SUCH A GREAT SONG! OH MY HEART!

18. Blank Space: HA! I love this song!

19. Out of the Woods: girl does not have normal relationships

20. How You Get the Girl: OOOOF! I mean come on, she's literally giving instructions!

21. Bad Blood: Fuck you song if ever I heard one! "You made this mess, you know that right?" Kinda vibes

22. Clean: (hand over heart in salute) I feel you sis!

23. Wonderland: Love this! Also, who is this green eyed boy she keeps mentioning?!

24. Look at What You Made Me Do: love this! "Fine, now I'm the bad guy" vibes 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

25. This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! DUDE!!! LOVE THIS!!! 🤣

26. Gorgeous: Love this! UGH SHUT UP YOUR PRETTY FACE! Also about Chris Evans lol

27. Getaway Car: Damn, I've had a few of these, and yeah nothing good happens in a getaway car. Doomed! Lol

28. Dress: HOT!!!

29. New Years Day: Oh my heart!!!

30. The Man: FUCK YES!!!

31. The Archer: wow, exhausting/exhausted, this poor kid!

32. London Boy: FUCK. (This totally made me think of JQ) lol

33. Paper Rings: LOVE!!! ❤️❤️❤️

34. Cruel Summer: relatable lol

35. Cardigan: Sobbing 😭

36. Ivy: UGH! Made me cry!

37. Exile: FML. SOBBING. FR UGLY CRYING.

38. Champagne Problems: this girl needs a hug

39. Illicit Affairs: OUCH!

40. Coney Island: 🖤

41. Hoax: I am bereft. I feel like I just broke up with all of my exes at once.

42. Gold Rush: definitely about Chris Evans. Also the way I flirt, if you're too perfect, I avoid and ignore. And if I can't do that, I heckle.

43. Tis the Damn Season: FEEEEELS!!!

44. Mirrorball: she needs all of the hugs, and some real friends.

45. No Body, No Crime: I would absolutely hide bodies for her. I would die for her.

45. Betty: I have questions? Also, I 🖤 when she says fuck.

46: Evermore: I liked it, but I didn't have a definitive "note"

47. Antihero: HA!

48. Maroon: I really love it when she says fuck. It may be a new kink for me.

49. Lavender Haze: I really want her to get a girlfriend.

50. You're on Your Own Kid: SO GOOD!

51. Bejeweled: FUCK YES!!!

52. Mastermind: 😈😈😈 I've done this. This is me.

53. The Great War: bonded like war buddies lol

54. High Infidelity: Feels decidedly Hellcheery

55. Would've Could've Should've: DAAAAAMMMMNNN!!!!

56. Dear Reader: WOW

And I am SPENT! This was a rollercoaster of emotions, and I enjoyed the whole fucking time. I am now a ride or die T Swift fan. Dude, I had no idea. Thank you so much MJ for this guided tour, I had the best time today! 🥰

[mermaidsirennikita]

hey, big fan of your book recommendations! your opinions are always really insightful. i was wondering if you possibly had any suggestions for a lancelot/guinevere romance? or perhaps something of a similar-ish vein?

Hey, thank you! I try my best.

I love Lancelot and Guinevere's story--unfortunately, I've yet to find a romance that's specifically about them, probably due to the associations with tragedy (no HEA) and cheating (something few romance novelists touch).

If you want similar vibes, I would recommend trying:

Waking Up with the Duke by Lorraine Heath--An all time favorite of mine. The reason why I'm recommending it is that there is cheating, but both of the cheaters love the person they're fucking around on. It's actually sanctioned by the heroine's husband, because he's now impotent and wants his wife to get pregnant. He sets up for his cousin/best friend to sleep with her, knowing that the cousin/best friend is renowned as a great lover and will treat her well without falling in love with her. Except... he's actually been in love with her for yeeeears. Very queenly, ladylike heroine. Lots of angst and sneaking around as physical attraction gives way to deep feelings.

To Taste Temptation by Elizabeth Hoyt--This is another one with cheating, where the person being cheated on is actually a good guy and that adds to the angst (I believe he actually becomes a hero of his own book later). The heroine is a widowed single mother and is engaged to a good friend she dearly loves, but the hero (who is of a lower class than her, and a soldier) comes to town and gets her all hot and bothered and tempted. An illicit affair ensues.

Notorious Pleasures by Elizabeth Hoyt--I don't remember the person being cheated on in this one being like... A good guy? But I don't remember if he was a bad one. Either way, the heroine is all upper class and engaged, and begins a very angsty, heated affair with her betrothed's rogueish brother. Hoyt books are often on the angstier, sexier side, which adds to the recs.

The Ranger by Monica McCarty--No cheating in this one, but you may like the medieval vibes as well as the class setup of it all. The hero is a knight (basically all the heroes of McCarty's Highland Guard series are knights, as an added bonus, but this guy is a second son so it's a bit more emphasized) and the heroine is a laird's daughter, very much a fine lady princess classic type. The thing is that he's actually a spy for Robert the Bruce, who her father opposes--but she doesn't realize this. So while she's falling for him and he's reluctantly feeling the same way, he has these other loyalties that keep him from committing to her fully. At one point she is being seriously courted by another man as well, and the hero escorts her to see said other man, and uh..... things.... and people.... go down.

Duchess by Day, Mistress by Night by Stacy Reid--This one doesn't have cheating other, but to me you get queenly lady/lionheart/illicit affairs vibes. The heroine is a widowed single mother, and after her son's governess goes missing she hires this self-made man of the world to look for her. He kinda becomes her right hand man, and there's this simmering attraction that very quickly becomes a full blown affair, but due to class differences she won't claim him.

And if you want a straight up... wild... Lancelot/Guinevere movie, lol, the 90s-era First Knight is some WACKY SHIT with a happy ending... For Lancelot and Guinevere lmao

[softspiderling]

illicit affairs - part nine

summary:

“You guys are totally in love with each other.”

You sneered, but your heart started beating a little faster at the chance of Rafe reciprocating your feelings. You tried not to let it show on your face though, as you rolled your eyes.

“What, he said that to you?”

OR; Topper offers you some unsolicited advice, Rafe and Kelce try to win your dad over, and you have another fight. Seriously, what is up?

pairing: rafe cameron x reader

warnings: actually very little rafe in this😭

word count: 2,1k

author's note: hi :) idk what to tell you😭 leave some love 🫶🏼 (I SAID LOVE) also pls see this post regarding future updates

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

pt. nine: "leave the perfume on the shelf"

After sending Rafe out of the bathroom - not before making sure the coast was clear - you returned to the table, ignoring how Topper was side eyeing you.

It didn’t take long until they started serving the actual brunch and the four of you fell into easy conversation as you ate. Occasionally, Rafe would scoot some of his tomatoes over on your plate, and you rolled your eyes at him - he had a palate of five year old - but you didn’t say anything, piercing the tomatoes with your fork. By the time dessert was served, you were full.

“Yo that cake looks good, but I eat one more bite, I might actually explode,” Kelce groaned, sitting back in his chair. He had even gone so far to unbuckle his belt.

“That cake looks so fire, though.”

Topper careened his neck to look at the cake over on the cake stand, while Rafe sipped on his whiskey.

“Nobody is stopping you, Top,” he mused and you narrowed your eyes when you saw your father gather his friends, walking over in your direction.

“Head’s up.”

The four of you quickly straightened your backs and Kelce fixed his belt before the group of men arrived at your table.

“Boys. Sweet pea,” Your father said, kissing your head.

“Hi dad,” you said as the boys greeted your father.

“Are you enjoying yourselves?”

“Yes, it’s been really nice,” Topper said. “You’ve really outdone yourself with the planning.”

Your father laughed, shaking his head.

“I think that honor goes to my wife and my daughter,” your father said, placing his hand on your shoulder, inadvertently making Rafe take his arm off of the back of your chair. He only grimaced, putting his hand in his lap and you bit back a snort.

“Anyways, we were going for a quick round of cigars, get the digestion going, are you boys down to join?”

Your father looked in your round and you didn’t miss the fact that he had only asked your friends, and not you. Obviously, you weren’t joking to join anyways, but it’d be nice to be included every once in a while.

“I’d love to,” Rafe said, standing quickly.

“I’ll come too!” Kelce said, rounding the table, but you only pulled a face.

“Have fun increasing your chances of lung cancer,” you scoffed and Topper made an agreeing noise, throwing his arm around your shoulder.

“Yeah, me and precious will stay here. Smoke free zone.”

You only snorted out a laugh, throwing a dirty look at Topper and he only stared back at you with raised eyebrows.

“Kay,” Rafe said, glancing between the two of you before the group of men left.

An uncomfortable silence settled over you and Topper, and you tried to ignore him. Still, you could feel his eyes on you, so you slipped your phone out of your purse, checking instagram - anything to distract yourself. As you scrolled through the pictures, Topper leaned in closer, so close, you could feel his breath on your cheek.

“I’m not leaving,” he said. “You’re going to have to talk to me eventually.”

“Topper, you’re so fucking annoying,” you huffed, dropping your phone on the table.

“How do you not realize that this isn’t going to end well!”

“Why not?” you asked, exasperated, even though you knew exactly why it wasn’t going to end well.

“You guys are totally in love with each other.”

You sneered, but your heart started beating a little faster at the chance of Rafe reciprocating your feelings. You tried not to let it show on your face though, as you rolled your eyes.

“What, he said that to you?”

“Of course he didn’t,” Topper scoffed. “The only person he talks about his feelings with is you. And he’s obviously not going to tell you that he loves you.”

“Topper.”

“This is gonna backfire so badly and you’ll stop talking to each other. Just stop having sex with him!”

“Topper, thanks for the unsolicited advice but I think I’m good,” you said, frowning at him.

“I’m just trying to help you!”

“By breathing down my neck and making me feel like shit?”

Topper sighed and you only crossed your arms over your chest. He leaned his head on your shoulder.

“I’m not trying to make you feel like shit, okay? I’m sorry,” he sighed. “I just really think you haven’t thought this through. You need to talk to him, before all of it blows up in your face, because that is inevitable.”

You let out a breath, blinking as you refused to look at Topper, knowing he was right, but also hating how he was bringing up the points you yourself had been worried about.

“I need some air,” you muttered, pushing yourself off of the counter, leaving Topper behind as he called after you, but you’ve had enough of his nosy ass. You walked to the far end of the backyard, where the country club met the water, far enough to not be seen by any one, but still close enough to be considered on country club grounds. Taking off your heels, you sat down by the docks, inhaling deeply, hoping to ease some of the anxiety that was sitting in your neck. From this far out, you could only hear the music and chatter of the brunch faintly, slowly, you could feel your shoulders ease.

Your peace was short lived.

“Ah Princess.”

Great. About the last person you had wanted to see right now.

“I’m not in the mood, JJ.”

“Oooh, trouble in paradise?” he asked, taking the freedom to plonk himself down on the dock next to you like you were friends. You lifted your head to look at him as he tried to loosen his collar, grimacing a bit.

“I don’t remember inviting you to sit with me.”

“Sorry, is this not a public space?” he asked, still struggling with his buttons.

“Jesus, are you incapable of unbuttoning things?” you muttered, fed up with his jerking and slapped his hands away, unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt. Your fingers brushed over his skin, which felt hot to your touch, his breath fanning across your hand as he watched you with a gleam in his eyes.

“I’m usually better at taking clothes completely off, and not only halfway, ya know?”

You rolled your eyes at him, pulling your hands away when you were done.

“There, you heathen.”

JJ let out a breath, as freed his neck, as if he had been suffocating.

“Thanks Princess.”

Scoffing, you turned away from him, looking out to the water. What an idiot.

“Don’t say I never do anything for you.”

“Hey, you’ve done plenty for me, I would never be able to afford fixing up my bike if you hadn’t gotten me this job,” JJ protested. “And you know I’m grateful for that.”

“Grateful?” you echoed, giving him a look. “And how are you showing that exactly? By starting shit with my friends while half of Kildare is watching?”

JJ winced, but he gave you a wry grin.

“Okay, maybe I need to work on that. But Rafe is just too easy to rile up, I can’t pass up an opportunity like that Princess.”

“See if I ever do you any favors again,” you muttered and JJ’s eyes softened.

“Look, I’m sorry if you got caught in the crossfire, okay? That wasn’t my intention.”

JJ sighed, scratching the back of his neck. “I’ll lay off provoking Rafe in the near future when any grown ups are around, okay? For your sake,”

“Gee, you’re such a gentleman,” you mocked and he snorted. “No wonder every girl is fawning over you."

“Don’t say I never do anything for you,” JJ said theatrically, throwing your own words back at you.

You rolled your eyes at him, begrudgingly and even though you knew he was still a dick, you bumped his shoulder with yours in silent thanks.

“Mr. Maybank, the tables won’t bus themselves.”

The two of you whirled around to see your mother stand at the end to the dock, her hands on her hips.

“On it, ma’am!” JJ said, getting to his feet. “Princess.”

He winked at you before walking in quick strides to the backyard. You envied him, because judging by your mother’s face, you had a lecture coming.

“Did you have to talk to him that way, mom?” You sighed, getting up and straightening your dress.

“We’re not paying him to sit around and ogle you.”

“Jesus,” you muttered. “We’re not even paying him. The country club is.”

“And who do you think is paying the country club for hosting the brunch?”

You rolled your eyes before you turned to your mom as she walked towards you, her eyes in slits.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed the last minute request for JJ Maybank for the staff.”

“I wasn’t trying to hide it, mom,” you replied, not a fan of where this conversation was going. “He needed the money and the country club needed some extra hands, what’s the big deal?”

“The big deal?” Your mother frowned at you. “He embarrassed you, me and your father!”

“Mom, my friends and JJ had an.. Argument. It was over before anyone even noticed,” you argued.

Your mother only sighed deeply, pinching the bridge of her nose before she glowered at you.

“Do you do this on purpose? Invite boys to fight over you to ruin my brunch?”

You raised your eyebrows at her, feeling a lump in your throat forming. Wow. Your mom never missed.

“Seriously, mom?. That’s a new low for you.”

Throwing your heels on the ground, you slipped your feet into it, before lifting your head to glare at your mother.

“If I’m such an embarrassment for you, maybe I should just leave.”

“Oh don’t be dramatic,” your mother exclaimed but you were already walking past her, throwing your hands up, knowing she wouldn’t follow you to avoid making a scene.

You more or less stomped past the country club and walked towards the main street, even though you had arrived with your parents and it was about a 20 minute walk back home, in heels maybe even 30 minutes.

Angry tears were brimming in your eyes, refusing to let them fall. Your mother always was like this, lashing out when she was upset before crawling back with an apology with empty gifts and a promise it wouldn’t happen again, just for it to repeat the next time you messed up in her eyes.

You weren’t walking long until a familiar sounding car pulled up next to you, the windows pulling him to reveal your best friends, each of them sporting a worried look on their faces.

The door opened from the inside and wordlessly, you climbed into the passenger seat, before Rafe pulled away from the curb. No one said anything, the car smelling faintly of cigars as you drove in silence.

“You can say something, I’m not gonna break,” you finally huffed and the tension broke, with Kelce reaching from the back to squeeze your shoulder gently.

“Sorry, precious.”

“You don’t even know what happened.”

“You were stomping away from the country club and your mother had that fake smile on when we came back from inside, doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together,” Rafe replied, glancing at you as he stopped at a red light.

“You okay?”

“It’s nothing new,” you answered. “Just my mom’s usual bullshit.

“Doesn’t make it okay,” Topper said and you only sighed, melting into your seat. The drive didn’t take long before you pulled up outside Rafe’s house, the four of you walking inside like it was second nature, taking a seat in the living room.

“Ugh I need a break from all this bullshit,” you said, rubbing the inner corner of your eye, careful not to smudge the mascara.

“Same,” Rafe sighed, throwing his arm over the back of the couch, pausing. “Ward, Rose and Wheeze are going to Spain on Friday.”

“Good for them?” Kelce said, confused and Rafe rolled his eyes.

“I’m saying that the house in the bahamas is free.”

You glance at him, frowning.

“Are you saying we should go to the Bahamas?”

Rafe shrugged with his shoulders. “Only a suggestion.”

“I could do with a vacation,” Topper said, tapping his knees excitedly and Kelce pulled his face in a grin.

“Bahamas doesn’t sound too shabby right now.”

All of three of them turned to you, each eyebrows raised higher than the other and you only looked at them with narrowed eyes, before sighing.

“Alright, let’s go to the Bahamas.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

author’s note: what are your thoughts? :)

[ralvezfanatic]

I need Love you

Luke Alvez x Unsub!Male!Reader

Reader is a serial killer, and currently the Unsub the BAU is going after.. but, also Luke's boyfriend. That, however, doesn't stop Luke from being with him, and much much less, sleeping with him. This part is not necessary to Part 2 of "I love need you" You do not have to read this for part two to make sense. Anything you need to know will be added in the other part.

Warnings: Pure smut, literally 2k words of absolutely porn, I'm so sorry. Not beta-read. Sorta proofread but I promise you there will be mistakes because i somehow always miss them. (pls lmk if theres any mistakes tho 😭 my ask box is open for you to call me out on my terrible writing !!)

Part 2 (WIP)

Word Count: 2.3k

You were a serial killer, and more specifically, the serial killer Luke and his team were going after. Yet, that didn't stop him from dating you, and much less sleeping with you. He knew you were the Unsub his team were after, but he couldn't turn you in, not when you were his boyfriend and he was in love with you. It wasn't right.

You also knew he was a fed, and that his team was after you. But, you also knew he could never turn you in, as long as you made him happy, there was no reason for him to send the love of his life to jail. You weren't dating him just so you could be free though, but because you “loved” him too. Since the first time you laid eyes on him, you have been head over heels for him, and did everything in your power to get with him.

Although you both were complete opposites in the work aspect, neither of you cared. He knew he could get in trouble, hell he'd get sent to jail for aiding a criminal. But that didn't matter, Luke knew how to cover himself, how to make it seem like everything was alright. After all, his team didn't know the true identity of the Unsub they were looking for. Yes, they knew Y/N, and they knew him as Luke's boyfriend, a nice guy, a loving and innocent man. They adored you actually. They did not know though. how you killed people, without hesitation. Or remorse. Nothing.

That's how Luke ended up in your bed once more, naked and you. You looked down at him, with your big E/C eyes glistening with love obsession and lust. You straddled his stomach, your hands roaming over his bare chest as your ass teased his cock.

Luke, though conflicted and torn, couldn't ignore the arousal that surged through his body at the sight of you above him. Despite the knowledge of your dark nature, the mutual desire and affection drew Luke deeper into the web of passion.

You smiled, leaning down to meet his face, your dick rubbing against both of your stomachs as you captured his mouth into a kiss.

He moaned into the kiss, his tongue intertwining with yours, desperately seeking solace and distraction from the moral implications of the illicit affair. Your taste on his lips was intoxicating, and he couldn't resist tangling his fingers in the strands of your messy hair, pulling you closer.

You groaned, feeling the friction on your cock, rocking yourself to pleasure yourself, your ass moving back and brushing past his dick at the same time.

As you continued to grind your bodies together, Luke's hips instinctively lifted, seeking more contact, wanting to feel the delicious friction against his aching cock. His hands trailed down your back, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake, before finally reaching your round ass, squeezing it firmly.

You moaned into the kiss as he squeezed your ass, your cock twitching between your stomachs.

The passionate kiss broke momentarily, and Luke took a moment to gasp for air, his voice husky with desire. "God, Y/N... You feel so good... I don't care about anything anymore... I just want you, right here, right now." His hips involuntarily bucked upward, his need for release becoming undeniable.

As he broke the kiss, you sat back up on him, looking down at you, your eyes full of lust, his cock leaking precum as you spoke. "Mm, I want you too Luke. So bad, don't care how wrong it is.. I need you." You smiled, a hint of evilness in your face, although that was just natural at this point, your love need for him being genuine.

You lifted yourself up, backing up and taking his cock under you. You held it firmly under your ass, teasing the both of you, circling your hole with his tip, groaning as you felt his length tease your entrance.

Luke's breath hitched as you continued to tease him, his heart pounding in his chest. The control you exerted over both your bodies only heightened the intensity of their desire.

“Mm, even without being in me, you make me feel so good.” You groan out, biting your lip trying to hold back moans. You look down at him, a small smirk as you push yourself down and take in his tip.

His hands instinctively gripped the sheets beneath him, his knuckles turning white from the sweet torment. The way your tight heat encased the head of his cock sent jolts of pleasure coursing through his veins, making him ache for more.

Luke couldn't help but gaze up at you, taking in the sight of your flushed face, the way your lips parted in pleasure. Your words sent shivers down his spine, igniting an inferno deep inside him. "Fuck, Y/N... You're driving me insane... I need to be inside you, all the way."

With a mixture of desperation and determination, Luke guided your hips, urging you to take more of him. He lost himself in the sensation of his cock slowly sinking into the velvet warmth of your body, inch by agonizing inch. "Oh God, Y/N... You feel incredible... So fucking tight..."

As you wrapped around him, taking him in fully, Luke couldn't hold back the moans that escaped his lips, pure bliss coursing through his veins. He couldn't resist thrusting his hips upward, meeting your movements, the primal need for pleasure driving him forward.

You allowed him to guide you down onto his dick, moaning out loudly as his thick length stretched you open. Tears welled up as he ripped your entrance open, never getting used to his size no matter how many times you’ve been with him. "Oh fuck Luke.. Always forget how big you are.." You grunt as your walls clenched around him

You stayed on his cock for a moment, until your walls finally relaxed. You began to move slowly, grinding on his dick, shutting your eyes and throwing your head back as he brushed past your most sensitive spot. "Feels so good.. need you so bad." You groaned out, started to speed your movements up

Getting used to his size, you lift your hips up and drop them back down, moaning loudly as you slammed yourself onto him. You started riding him, bouncing up and down your cock desperately, moaning out pornographically.

As you rode him with an expertise that left him breathless, Luke's hands roamed your body, desperately seeking to touch every inch of your heated flesh. He reveled in the feel of your muscles contracting around him, the way you moaned and writhed above him.

All your movements were well calculated and perfected. You leaned down slightly, your hands on either side of his head as your ass took in his cock. Your eyes were shut and face flushed, moaning out loudly as you fucked yourself on him. "So big.. so good. Can't get enough of you Luke.."

Luke's mind and body were consumed by an overwhelming mixture of pleasure, desire, and guilt. The sight of your body moving so sinfully atop his, taking him deep inside, was both exhilarating and torturous. He couldn't deny the intoxicating effect you had on him.

With a groan, Luke arched his back, meeting your thrusts with his own, creating a rhythm that was both frantic and intoxicating. The sounds of your explicit moans filled the room, mingling with the creaking of the bedframe and the heavy breathing that echoed through the air.

"Yes... fuck, you feel so amazing... I can't get enough of you either." Luke's voice was strained, laced with desire and the weight of their secret. "Ride me, baby... Take what you need... I'm yours."

As you continued riding him, his phone rang on the nightstand he had put it on earlier that night.

You heard it, and looked over, seeing a familiar name on it. Emily Prentiss. You got annoyed, knowing that call was to take him away from you, and you weren't going to let that happen when you were so happy and getting lost in pleasure. You continued to ride him faster and harder, moving your hands to find his wrists.

As the sound of Luke’s ringtone pierced through the air, a mixture of frustration and anxiety coursed through him. He knew that answering the call was necessary, but he didn't want to be torn away from this moment of pure ecstasy.

Once you found his wrist, you pinned them against the bedsheets. With the way you rode you, and held his wrists, you didn't allow him to move whatsoever, not wanting to pick up the ringing phone. "God Luke, you feel so fucking good. Fill me up so well.. I'm so close" You whined out, your voice growing needy as you tried to distract him from the phone.

Feeling your hands grip his wrists, pinning them against the mattress, Luke's gaze locked with yours, a mixture of desire and determination in his eyes. He couldn't help but smile, admiring your defiance, your unwillingness to let anything interrupt the passion between you. Luke's heart raced as he felt the intensity of your movements increase, your urgency mirroring his own. He couldn't help but groan in pleasure as you rode him harder, the stimulation driving him closer to the brink.

"You're insatiable, Y/N... and I love it," Luke growled, his voice thick with desire. Despite the distraction, he refused to let it dampen the moment. He used the strength in his hips to meet your movements, thrusting upward to meet your downward motion. "I'm so close too, baby... I want to fill you... claim you as mine."

With every thrust, every twist and jerk of his hips, Luke brought you both closer to the edge. The intensity of the moment, the forbidden pleasure, fueled his desire to claim you completely, to make this moment unforgettable.

You cried out desperately, feeling your orgasm quickly approaching, and your legs growing weak, struggling to ride him any longer. "Luke, I'm so close, please baby."

"Fuck me, pin me down against the bed and fill me up with your cum. Make me yours.” You begged, your movements slowing down, and releasing his wrists from your hold, waiting for him to dominate you as you grew tired.

Luke's breath hitched at your words, a mixture of desire and adoration enveloping him. The way you begged for his cum, for him to claim you completely, sent shivers down his spine. His control wavered as he gazed up at you, feeling his own climax edging closer.

Driven by the raw intensity of the moment, Luke's hands found their way to your hips, gripping them firmly as he halted your movements. With a dominant growl, he swiftly flipped you onto your back, pinning you down against the mattress.

You smiled as he dominated you, flipping you into your back harshly. You giggled as he hovered over you, your face flushed and a dopey smile on him as you locked eyes with him. "Please, please, wreck me! Ruin me, I'm all yours." You begged, your voice laced with desperation and a need for you

"Fuck, baby..." Luke's voice was heavy with need as he positioned himself between your legs, his eyes locked with yours. "You want me to fill you up? To make you mine? You've got it, baby. I'm going to fuck you so hard, you won't be able to walk straight."

With a swift thrust, Luke buried himself deep inside you, claiming you as his own. The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room as he pounded into you relentlessly. The pleasure and desire in his eyes spoke volumes, mingling with the love he felt for you in every touch, every thrust.

You groaned out loudly as he buried into you, shutting your eyes as moaning out loudly. Your mouth fell agape, slightly drooling as he pounded into you, your body rocking with each of his thrusts.

"Oh god Y/N... You feel amazing," he groaned, his voice husky and filled with need. "You're mine... All mine. No one else can have you like this."

His thrusts became faster, harder, the bed creaking beneath them as your bodies moved in perfect sync. The room was filled with the sound of your moans, the scent of sweat and arousal heavy in the air. The pleasure built, blurring the lines between pain and ecstasy, until finally, Luke gave in to the overwhelming wave of pleasure that cascaded through him.

Your hands were by your side, gripping the bed sheets underneath you."Yes Luke, I'm all yours, only yours. Just for you baby.." You whimpered out, your voice high as you tried to hold back moans.

"I-I'm so close Luke.. Gonna, cu-cum.." You warned, your cock twitching and spurting out precum as your orgasm approached.

With one more of his thrusts, you arched your back and your seed shot out of you in thick ropes, covering your belly as you moaned out your name happily.

Luke couldn't tear his eyes away from the sight before him as you surrendered to the pleasure, your body arching and your voice filling the room with delicious cries of ecstasy. Seeing you completely vulnerable, completely submissive, only fueled the fire burning within him.

He continued to pound into you, relishing in the way your body tightened around him, the way your moans grew louder and more desperate. Each thrust brought him closer to the edge, his need for release reaching its peak.

As he continued to fuck you through your orgasm, and even after, you cried out in pleasure. You loved the way you got overstimulated as he fucked you, searching for his own release, loving the way he used you for his pleasure after you were done, even if you could barley handle it. "Luke, please. Fill me up.. give me your cum.." You cried out, still desperate to be filled.

With a final thrust, he grunted, his body trembling as he released deep inside you, claiming you as his own. His hot cum filled you, marking you as his, and he relished in the ecstatic release that washed over you. "You're mine Y/N.. forever."

His breath came out in ragged pants as he collapsed on top of you, his body trembling with the aftershocks of pleasure.

Part 2 (WIP)

[gabenvrhappened]

MusicOr… Guilty Conscience by Tate McRae

Favorite Lyrics: I'll be wanting you back til the cops stop calling ⬩ Waist deep in the mess you started ⬩ Cause I need you, darling ⬩ Is that wrong? 

My unconsciousness works in mysterious ways. There's something in me that seems to enjoy discovering a fire song late at night, when I can't cry my heart out loud, even though I desperately want to. That was definitely the case with Guilty Conscience from Tate McRae's Think Later album. Even though We're Not Alike had me hooked at first with its old-school vibe and raspy voice, and Run For The Hills grew fast on me like poison ivy, Guilty Conscience was crowned the song that had my dopamine hitting high peaks.

If you're not new here, then you'll probably know why. If you are, let's recap the reasons why it was obvious that I would be claiming the song for myself: a bad boy charms a sad girl into an intense relationship that has that dangerous thrill of recklessly inappropriate actions. It will definitely cause deep harm and legal implications, but that's something that can be figured out in another desperate lonely moment with a vodka bottle as your companion. The perfect combination for an inconsequential adventure.

It kind of reminds me of Gossip Girl, a TV show that shaped my entire personality. Lies are thrown around like money, and consequences are never faced. All disguised as an irresistibly perfect world where having illicit affairs and a criminal record are just as sexy as a girls' night out in expensive designs you didn't bother checking the price tag for. Maybe that's another reason why this song will be my spiritual animal for months.

Especially for me, who was born with a guilty head. Trying to learn not to blame myself for almost anything is something I'm learning day by day. Like recently, when I lost the chance to kiss the cutest guy in a stadium who wanted to kiss me just as much. Of course, there was a time when all I would have were missed opportunities, but hopefully, that's not the case anymore. Maybe I shouldn't get into too many details, but let's just say that recently I had an escapade that included a stranger in a dark alley.

This makes me realize that I'm actually experiencing things I would only live vicariously through songs. As my therapist cleverly pointed out, I'm allowing myself to live instead of shutting myself off. So I guess I need to get used to doing things that will lead me to grow a guilty conscience that I won't pay attention to. Let's think later and live now.

[shaunamilfman]

lottie so good at lying i damn near believed her myself 🤔 did i start reading it at 11 and only just finished it at 12?? maybe (i get distracted 😞) but it was sooo gooddd🙏if you peaked at illicit affairs then you’ve like 🤔gone beyond the peak cuz you never miss

but now i need a fic where she’s actually a cowboy🤔daughter of some rich guy but she’s a masked bandit 🤔 pairs well with spider-lottie too omg spidercowboy lottie WOAH

did a health and safely exam this morning it was multiple choice so if i fail it i’m STUPID 😭

also saw the hot security guard that i’m in love with i’m telling you i NEED her so bad

-🦈

i just think it's fun to write lottie a little manipulative ngl. im glad you like it. it was actually the fic I've been least sure of tbh.

cowboy spiderman made me laugh a little ngl. bro would be the most useless superhero omg. there's generally no really tall buildings unless your in the city (where horses generally aren't). bro would be taking the bus to crime scenes ig but again, not a lot of public transportation unless you live in the city. maybe former cowboy lottie who moved to New York for college lmaoooo

when they know health and safety protocols 🥵🥵. you should lead with that with your security guard im sure it works.

[supercorpkid]

Illicit Affairs

Supergirl, Lena Luthor x BabyDanvers!Reader, Kara Danvers x B!D, Alex Danvers x B!D

Word Count: 3500.

Notes: This fic is inspired by Taylor Swift's song 'Illicit Affairs'. And yes guys, I know cheating is bad, but is it so awful when it's happening to James?

“Just-” Lena stops you, holding your hand before you walk out the door. “Make sure nobody sees you leave.”

“Yeah, I-I got it.” You throw the hood of your sweatshirt over your head, with your eyes trained on the floor and you leave Lena’s house.

It’s insane. What you and Lena are doing can't be described as anything else. Most days when you leave her house, you hate yourself. It comes this self-loathing weight, that you carry all the way back home when you think about exactly what you two are doing. 

“Hey, Y/N!” Kara greets you as soon as you throw your key on the bowl next to the door. You lower your hood, dripping wet from the rain you just caught. “Where were you?”

“Running.” It’s your first excuse because you always come home looking flushed. It's the most used one. The one she should expect by now.

“Gee, with this rain?” She looks up at the sky like you could have missed it, when you are literally soaking wet. “What, are you training for a marathon or something?”

“Just needed to get away from you for a minute.”

“Ok, this is hurtful.” She pretends, hand on her heart, while you make your way to the fridge for some water. Kara stands up from her couch, coming closer. “Just wanna let you know that we’ll be having game night tomorrow, and I tried to run from it, but by the looks of it, we’ll have to host it.”

“Oh, it’s fine Kar. I mean it’s your house and you love game night.” You put your head down, somehow hating yourself even more now. “I’m sorry I’m overstaying my welcome. I promise I’ll get out of your hair in a few days.”

“No! I’m not telling you to go, golly, I would never!”

“Did you just say ‘golly’?”

“Hey, you’re my baby sister. And I love you more than anything and you can stay for as long as you want. Actually, you can live with me for the rest of your life!”

“Thanks, but I’ll pass.” You chuckle. “I need my own place. You know you snore, right?”

“Well-” She tries to think of something to say back. “You drool.” 

“Alright, well, I love you.” You kiss her forehead on your way to the bathroom. “Thanks for the heads up about the game night. And let me know if you want me to be out of the house while it happens.”

“No! I want you to join in, weirdo.” 

“Right. Ok. Great!” You go inside the bathroom, closing the door behind you, and leaning on the sink trying to regain some self control. Two months since this whole thing started and oh, God, you need to get a grip on yourself. You should be better than that. And most of all, you have got to stop having sex with Lena Luthor.

Game night.

“Hey.” Alex hugs you on the way inside Kara’s apartment. “How’s the apartment hunting going? I heard there’s one in my building for rent.”

“Really? Oh, I’ll go check it out.” You lie. You are not going to live in the same building as any of your sisters. Two months staying with Kara is already enough. You need your own space for sure.

“Hey Y/N!” James walks in right behind Alex and you force a smile. 

“‘Sup, bro.” It’s what comes out of your mouth. James furrows his eyebrows, head tilting to the side, finding it so confusing your new way to greet him. “Let the games begin.”

You roll your eyes at yourself when no one is looking. You have to stop being this weird or people will start to catch on. You move to the living room, Kara is sitting on the floor and you join her, wanting to be far away from everyone else besides your sisters. You feel very uncomfortable around their friends now.

“Lena! Over here.” James calls her, looking at the door. Your heart squeezes on your chest and you look down at your hands, holding back the vomit that is threatening to go up your stomach and out of you. You hate yourself.

Lena comes closer, sitting next to her boyfriend, and the game starts. You will not, should not, cannot look at her.

“Hey, Y/N, are you with us?” Alex calls you and you look up at her trying to avoid all the looks that suddenly turned to you. You force a smile and agree slightly with your head. “You and Lena being a team, is that ok?”

You swallow hard, and Kara looks at you with furrowed brows because she can obviously hear your heart beating out of your chest after the suggestion.

“Back off, Alex.” Kara says putting a hand on your shoulder. “She’ll be with me as always, stop being jealous.”

“I’m not-” Alex scoffs. “Yeah, ok, whatever. I’ll take J’onn, and we will kick your asses.”

You and Kara look at each other with a smile on your faces and chant right after. “Danvers sisters, yes we can. If you can’t do it, Danvers can.”

“Maybe James and I will kick your asses too.” Lena says and James agrees all excited and you hold yourself back from rolling your eyes too hard.

“I’ll go get more chips. Why don’t Nia and Brainy start the game?” You get up from your place on the floor, trying to avoid looking at Lena, but failing. 

She doesn’t smile, Her face shows nothing and you wonder how she can do that. How can she just look at you like you’re nothing, when you were literally on her bed the day before? How can she have her hand on James’ shoulder, and his hand on her leg, when you have touched her body so thoroughly 24 hours ago?  

You turn away from her, shuffling the cabinets looking for more chips, and breathing deep. You can always stop. You can just stop having sex with your sister’s best friend, who is currently in a relationship with another one of your sister’s friend. You can stop the longing stares, and all the clandestine meetings. You can just-

“Hey!” Kara says and you jump-scare, hand on your heart. 

“Shit!” You complain trying to ease your breath. Kara looks back at everyone in the living room, making sure they can’t hear what the two of you are talking about. “I don’t have super hearing, weirdo. You almost gave me a heart attack.”

“You know, a lot of things are making your heart beat faster today. One of them is Lena’s name.” Kara states, speaking in a very low tone, almost a whisper. You’re glad she’s being discreet, because she usually isn't. But still, you don’t want to talk about it. 

Soon you see Alex getting up from the couch and coming to the kitchen as well. “Ok, I’m not enjoying this.” She confesses. “I think it’s time Y/N moves in with me. You guys are way too close and I’m feeling left out.”

You roll your eyes, annoyed. “We’re not close. Just- let’s just go back to playing and not talking.” You look at Kara with a severe look on your face. “About anything we know nothing about.”

“Alright.” She raises her hands defensively, and you go back to the same place you were. Lena glances at you, looking away as soon as you catch her eyes, and your heart dies and it dies and it dies a million little times.

All during game night you try not to be caught in between Lena’s glances, Kara’s furrowed brows, and Alex's jealous stares. It’s hard and you kind of wish you weren’t there at all, being even more sure that you need to find your own place sooner than later.

“Well,” Alex gets up, after looking at her phone. “Duty calls. J’onn and I have to go take care of this threat.” She looks back at James. “Would Guardian like to join?”

“I can go!” Kara says standing up, but James stands up right behind her, putting a hand on her shoulder. 

“I’ll go with them, we call if we need help. Enjoy game night.” James makes his way out, alongside Alex and J’onn. You breathe deep looking around to realize less people means interacting more with Lena.

You make your way to the bathroom, to try and clear your mind and ease your racing heart before Kara catches on, more so than she already is, and you look at yourself in the mirror. You smile when an evil plan comes to mind.

You look at the perfume on the shelf that you picked out just for Lena, and put it on. You untie your hair, wearing it down in a messy way. You smirk to your reflection in the mirror. Let’s see if Lena can resist that.

You come back, sitting right next to her. You know she can smell your perfume, and you know how much she loves when you have your hair down. She takes one deep breath, and bites her lower lip, looking at you from hooded eyes. The deal is, Lena can try and fake it as much as she wants, but her desire for you is undeniable. That’s what started this whole thing. How you feel about one another. Started with glances, then stolen stares and next thing you know, you’re way into this mess.

“Hey, you and Lena wear the same perfume.” Kara states, clearly being able to smell you after the amount you just put it on. 

“I don’t think we do.” You say, not thinking twice, which was the wrong answer to give Kara.

“Yes you do. It’s the same one Lena was wearing on Tuesday when we had lunch.” She points out, making Lena choke into her wine glass, and you think of how you spent your Tuesday morning naked under her. You’re glad J’onn left or he would’ve known exactly what this whole thing is.

“Oh, then I guess we do.” You smile, trying to change the subject, praying Kara will just let this go and move on from the you + Lena subject. She is too close for comfort.

Kara finally lets it go, and you all go back to playing games. Kara wins, and Lena stares at you getting higher and higher with her wine. Brainy wins the next game, and Lena sits terribly close to you when she comes back from her bathroom break. When you win the next one, she pats your back a little too long, to congratulate you for it. 

You feel her warmth next to you. She slurs her words, drinking and drinking, getting high enough to make her move on you when everyone leaves, never considering the fact that Kara is not going to leave her own apartment.

Here 's the thing. You know this is wrong. You know someone’s gonna get hurt from this. Might be James, might be you, might be everyone in this group of friends. Who knows. But what you sure is, there’s no way this is going to end well. It’s impossible. And if Kara catches on, it will probably end up in flames. But you can’t stop. You can’t stop how high and amazing you feel having your body tangled up in Lena’s. 

You think this is like a drug, you try to quit and run. You tell yourself you can just stop whenever you want, but then you see her face and ugh, you think this drug will work a hundred times more.

You hate yourself for romanticizing things when you know it’s wrong. This isn’t glamorous at all, but your heart and your body speaks louder than your mind when you’re around Lena.

“It’s time for us to go.” Brainy and Nia are already up when you realize what’s happening. You say a quick goodbye, but stay quiet on your place on the couch waiting for Lena to say she is leaving too. She doesn’t. 

Kara starts cleaning up the house and just when you get up to help, Lena gets up too. “Well, my driver is on his way.” She looks at you, lip between her teeth, clear desire in her eyes. “Y/N, can you walk me downstairs? I’m feeling a little tipsy.”

“Sure you are.” You agree, looking at the bottle of wine she drank all alone. 

“Lena, are you feeling ok? I can fly you home if you want.” Kara suggests coming closer, standing in front of you. You give Lena a little smirk, and quirk your eyebrow provocatively. You know you hit the right spot when she breathes out heavily.

“I’m fine.” She moves to the door, picking up her purse, not looking back at you. “Come Y/N, be a gentleman and walk me downstairs.”

You look at Kara with a smile on your face. “I guess I’ll be the gentleman.” You joke following Lena out of the apartment. 

She doesn’t talk all the way down the stairs, which would be extremely irritating on her part, if you didn’t know it was her way to provoke you back.

“Well, here we are.” You point at her car already waiting for her. She opens the door, and pushes you inside with unexpected strength. 

“You’ve been teasing me all night.” Lena closes the door behind her, pulling you by your sweater and kissing your mouth. Her tongue tastes like red wine, as she kisses you hot and full of desire. You whine into her mouth, and she sucks your lip harder. “Ugh, sometimes I think you’re dying to get caught.”

“Really?” You turn your head to the side, so she can’t kiss your lips anymore. Lena’s hands are still clinging to your clothes and she makes her way to your neck, kissing under your ear. You try to push her away. “You’re the one attacking me right in front of my sister’s building.”

“Oh please, like you don’t want this,” her hands go up your tights. “why else would you wear that fucking perfume?”

“Lena, stop.” You hold her hands so they don’t reach where she wants them. “Stop. Stop!” She finally moves out of your personal space with an annoyed huff. “I can’t do this anymore. You want to be with me, it’s so obvious! I don’t get why can’t you just break up with James!”

“Oh baby, you’re just a kid. You won’t get it.” 

“Don’t!” You slide away to the other side of the car seat, getting as far from her as possible. “Don’t call me kid! God, do not call me baby!” You can’t control the volume of your voice and you realize you’re screaming. Thank God her driver has the partition closed so he can’t hear or see you two. “Look at what you’ve turned me into, Lena. Look at the mess you made me!”

“Y/N, you have got to understand. This, us, just can’t happen.” She tries, sobering up fast when she comprehends what’s happening. “It would ruin everything.”

“You know damn well, for you I’d ruin myself.” 

Lena bites her tongue and you know she can’t tell you the same thing. You shake your head in disbelief, what the hell are you doing? You step out of her car, holding the door open just for a second to see if she’ll change her mind. She doesn’t.

You breathe deep, holding back your tears. “What started in beautiful rooms ends in a parking lot.” You shut the door closed loudly, making your way inside the building.

But you can’t go upstairs, not yet. Because you can’t stop your tears and you can’t tell your sister what’s going on. So you sit on the staircase, crying your heart out, thinking about how Lena made you feel things you've never felt with anyone else. How she made your life so much more colorful and right now, while she drives away, she’s taking all the colors with her and you’ll probably never see them again.

You need to get as far away from her as possible. And you know this means you have to get your own apartment.

One month later:

“Oh, Lena. I’m so glad you came.” Kara says when she opens her apartment door. “ I’m so sorry to hear about you and James.” And she throws her arms around her friend. 

“It’s ok Kara, I’m fine. It wasn’t meant to be.” Lena looks around Kara’s apartment like she is looking for something. “I haven’t been here in a while, but something looks different. Did you paint the walls? It looks less colorful.”

“Oh, yeah. Y/N moved out like a month ago, but I haven’t done anything to the walls.” Kara sighs. “I miss her around, but I guess she needs her own life. Oh! By the way, she was going to throw away this perfectly new perfume, but I saved it just in time.” Kara picks it up from the coffee table. “I was going to keep it, but I thought it would be weird if the three of us wore the same one.”

“Can I-” Lena reaches out, swallowing deep. “Have it?”

“Yeah, of course. I thought you might want it.” Kara gives her and she clings to it like it’s the most precious thing in the universe. 

“Thanks for keeping it.” She holds it closer to her heart. “You know, I-I miss your sister too.” Lena confesses, ignoring Kara’s confused look. “Can I have her new address?”

“What? I mean, why?” Kara’s perplexed expression almost makes Lena give up the request, but she already said it. Can’t take it back.

“For a visit.” She tries with a forced smile. 

“Oookay. Sorry, I just didn’t realize you guys were that close.” Kara writes it on a piece of paper that Lena reaches for desperately, just like she did with the bottle of perfume. 

“Yeah, we-um-should be closer. Well, thanks Kara. Think I’m gonna head over there now.”

“Now? But you just got here.” 

“Yeah, I’ll see you at lunch on Friday.” Lena rushes for a hug then almost runs down the stairs.

“Coming!” You yell when you hear the doorbell being rang repeatedly. “Jesus, what the hell do you want?” You open the door in a harsh movement and see Lena on the other side. You open your mouth, confused as to why she is here. “I mean,” You clear your throat. “what the hell do you want?”

“I broke up with James.” She blurts. You look at her lips, then her hands clinging to something, then back into her watery eyes.

“Good for you.” You sigh. “Is that all?”

“I was wrong.” She blurts out again. “So wrong, baby.”

“No, you were not. What we had was nothing but an illicit affair. You were right all along.” 

“You know I wasn’t.” Lena steps inside, uninvited. You don’t think it’s a good idea having Lena inside your apartment. Not with your history. Not when you know how terribly hard it was to break things off with her, and how awful you are doing at getting over her. “What we had was so much bigger than that, but I was so scared to rock the boat with our friends. With James and Kara. I thought they were all going to hate me for it.”

“Well, they don’t.” You cross your arms, keeping the distance. “But I do.”

“Y/N.” She whines. “Please.” She steps closer, holding out your perfume. You sigh, not taking it. Didn’t you throw this thing in the trash? You’re sure because you wanted to leave no trace behind, no clues.

“Lena, you should go. This thing started off as prohibited for a reason.”

She doesn’t leave, instead she comes close enough so she can touch you. Your heart squeezes tighter but relishes her touch. “I didn’t think I would fall in love with you. But I did. I’m in love with you and your smell, and your smile, and-” She traces patterns on your arm and it’s so, so familiar it’s painful. “I miss this secret language I can’t speak with anyone else.”

“Lena.” It’s your time to whine her name out of your lips, ignoring her gaze and the trail of goosebumps her touch brings to your skin.

Lena comes even closer, bodies touching, and whispers in your ear. “For you I’d ruin myself.”

And she means it. You know she does. So you kiss her. Hot and heavy, missing the taste of her lips and the feel on yours. You know this didn’t start right, but what can you do when it feels right? 

“I like your new apartment.” Lena has time to say while you’re pulling her towards your bed. 

You smirk, knowing damn well she didn’t even glance at it yet, only having eyes for you. “Great, I’ll make you sneak out of it in a bit.” You joke, getting a laugh in return, then a soft groan when her legs hit the end of the bed. “Now let’s just ruin each other.”

[chantsdemarins]

❄️Frost Secrets from the Other Son

Chapter 2-Loki, Meet Lillian

Summary:

When a Midgardian journalist comes to Asgard to record the royal history for humans, her illicit affair with Loki threatens to unravel Odin’s family and reveal his true parentage...

Literary smut ahead, haha

Chapter 2 Loki, Meet Lillian

Loki knew that he had already been talking and essentially flirting with many people at the solstice ball this evening; he arrived late, fresh from some other engagement off-world; he wasn’t entirely sure what was what since his return. He didn’t read memos or talk to any of the guilds who would have informed him of the importance of the evening solstice event. He knew bits and pieces of a human entourage of journalists arriving, but he assumed they would be much like the last humans who came by on official business, heady and boring.

He didn’t like this new arrangement; it was much more satisfying to roam Midgard and find the interesting humans when there were some, of course, which wasn’t all that often. Maybe every 200 years. But Loki had his sympathies, they had known about humans since the dawn of creation, and these lowly Midgardians just found out they weren’t alone…So he felt a bit guilty, and this woman before him was clearly just a human and out of her element.

He had noticed her though, her presence brought enough interest for him to conjure a way to meet her. This woman was delightfully curvy, the dress she was wearing was clearly ill sized, but this was to his liking. She was smart, he could tell, and he wondered what her role must be, maybe she was a messenger or sorts for the other human biographer?

The truth was, Loki didn’t always like himself, and he especially didn’t always like being the tortured eternal bachelor playboy. Maybe he would just be a tour guide tonight. Simple enough, no drama. He imagined himself much like the guarded palace he lived in.

He turned to Lillian and closed the heavy doors behind them. The thud brought Lillian’s attention to the fact that they were now alone in a massive dark library with only a few candles lit here and there, probably for a practical precaution against setting the whole room on fire, but the atmosphere it created was slightly romantic.

Loki, ever vigilant in his attempt at being professional, was walking through the aisles talking and talking about the origins of some of the collection, his large hands gently gliding past the many books. He took one off the shelf and brought it to Lillian. Holding the book to the candlelight, he showed her pictures that resembled the illuminated manuscripts she had once seen from the 14th century. More proof of Asgard’s status as horribly outdated.

Although she watched as Loki’s delicate fingertips luxuriously traced the book's spine as he placed it back on the shelf. Lillian sighed audibly. Was he seducing her with the Asgardian equivalent of encyclopedias?

Growing agitated with his pace, Lillian spoke, “Are you truly planning on giving me the complete tour of the royal library tonight?”

“I am already, aren’t I?” Loki said, spinning around with a wide grin.

“Too late.”

Lillian steadied herself. He was obviously playing this very cool. A little too cool for her Ohio, midwestern self, actually. Whether it was the trippy mead or just her own needs shaking her into a kind of space-drunk hybrid sobriety, she suddenly was unequivocal that she was a grown-ass woman. Indeed going further with this death metal-esque guy would be the kind of sabotage that might ruin this massive opportunity she had been given. She was also free to sleep with whoever she wanted. There was no moral chastity belt on Midgardian women on Asgard. Or was there? Did she possibly miss a briefing? At any rate, the debate inside her head had ended. She made her choice. It was now or never.

Loki was stalking near the nine realms sections, narrating his investigation of finding just the right book about Svartalfheim when he heard Lillian call to him.

“Hey, alien man, you’re talking a lot over there, and I’m over here wondering why you are still over there,” she was a little shaky in her delivery, but obviously she was now giving the man some kind of clue to her state of mind.

“Oh, I see.”

With a remarkably quick change of decorum, in a manner of seconds, Loki was over feigning to be a gentleman. He had made a gallant effort. He closed the Svartalfheim book with a loud clap, and with a fast swoop, he pinned Lillian against the nearest shelf.

A few of the ancient texts came crashing on the floor, barely missing them. Loki was very much “space drunk”, and it was the solstice, he was admittedly intrigued by this woman.

Loki placed his lips on hers tightly. She could feel the heat of his body, she could also feel more of him than she could see earlier.

“Oh god!” Lillian laughed.

“That’s me for certain!” Loki laughed equally.

“That’s you?”

Lillian thought he could be slightly overly confident at this point…

Loki cut her thinking short when he suddenly ruched up her dress until he could find her underwear. This was really happening. She still was hanging on to her professional principles enough to consider stopping him until he pushed aside her panties until he could place two long fingers inside her.

She flinched, and her mind went blank. It had been a while. Too long.

Loki seemed to understand just how long it had been as he felt how tight she was; his mind raced to how tight she would feel with his cock inside her. His mind was buzzing with pleasure. He thought Lillian smelled like Midgard. Like peaches or some other stone fruit, he recalled from his travels there.

“Do you want me to magic my clothes off, or do you want me to take them off myself? You seem like a visual person. I don’t want to rob you of the chance to watch a god strip in front of you.”

Lillian, of course, had the luck and lack of morality to be about to have sex with an Asgardian and one who seemed to think he was a god with magic. She wasn’t quite sure he was telling the truth about anything, so she offered,

“You can save your magic for when you are fucking me.”

Loki laughed at her defiance.

“Well, I don’t need magic for that; I am well equipped naturally to please. I’ve had 1,000 years to practice.”

Again, Lillian did not believe that about him.

He unfastened the front of his leather outfit, which seemed rather complicated and official. Lillian wondered if this man was a courier or messenger for the courts, obviously, something to do with talking.

He took off his shirt, and Lillian was stunned.

His body was unlike any man on Earth she had ever been with. At this point, the propranolol she had taken to calm her nerves was waning, and her heart started to beat with the current circumstances. Lillian felt she could see every possible muscle under his pale white skin.

His eyes were a delicate blue; they kept her attention the most, oddly. They offset the striking contrast with Loki’s black hair, which grazed his shoulders in spiraling curls.

When he kicked his leather pants off, he was completely naked. Apparently, on Asgard, men don’t wear underwear. Or maybe it was just this guy.

His cock was massive, just as it had felt when he was pinning her against the bookshelf, but more intimidating now that he was in his statuesque glory.

Instead of giving in to the fear and arousal she was being overwhelmed with, Lillian chose to again say something snarky.

“You know, bragging about your ability before you actually demonstrate it can harm your ability to impress someone….”

Loki heard her, but he also noticed her staring at him with a fierce, unwavering, deeply appreciative glare.

“You can say that, but you like what you see, don’t you?”

He knew Lillian’s heart was racing. He felt how wet she was; his fingers lingered inside her.

“I do like what I see, very much.”

Lillian had no choice but, to be honest once again. Suddenly things seemed like they were taking way too long once again. Much longer, Lillian might change her mind entirely and recoup her professionalism and purpose for this crazy trip.

She spoke up and stepped away slightly.

“Don’t you think we better hurry? I am supposed to be out there still meeting people, and I wouldn’t want to get caught either.”

Loki was indeed very drunk, so she was correct, he better hurry.

“Come here.” he motioned to her.

Loki held her close in his arms, kissing her neck, kissing where the straps of her dress met her warm skin. He gently pushed the material off her shoulders and tugged the rest of her dress until it fell to the wood floor, making a nice pile next to the books. She was now in her Midgardian bra and underwear. She wondered how often he’d seen that?

He picked Lillian up quickly with a surprise; since she wasn’t a tiny thing, this guy definitely worked out. Placing her delicately on the couch, he laid on top of her and pushed her panties aside once again with his long fingers, but this time, he lined his beautiful masterpiece of a cock against her.

“Aren’t you, I mean, do you want me to take off my bra and…,” Lillian shyly wondered aloud as she felt how smooth and hard he was, just almost making his way inside her.

“Nah.”

“No time.”

And with that, Loki lowered his face to Lillian’s neck and pushed himself gently inside her. She gasped. With fury, he found her clit and began moving his fingers around it as he pounded her core. Lillian felt like she was losing consciousness; her thoughts were fleeting; maybe she was too faded to be having sex with the first Asgardian man who gave her some attention…

“Ouch,” Lillian yelped as Loki picked her up by her ass to find a better angle to ram his cock into her.

“Oh…Oh, sorry, am I hurting you, my beauty?”

“You are just a little bigger than I’m used to and honestly, it’s uh, it’s uh…been awhile,” she panted.

“I can tell. Fuuuck. Fuuck.” Loki shouted just as Lillian started yelling in his ear. Usually, that kind of strong reaction would have been incredibly annoying, but Loki immediately loved it.

He felt appreciated and seen.

Lillian was fighting for logic as he pounded her deeper, “Hey, wait, she panted; I’m not on any Earth birth control. Are you on Asgardian birth control?” she queried; who knows if there was even such a thing.

He tried to reply with a few quick breaths, “Oh, don’t worry, Asgardian and Midgardian rarely ever conceive.” He couldn’t hold out any longer; he took a deep breath and came hard inside Lillian.

The intense feeling spurred her orgasm immediately following his; they both gasped for air and were barely able to find any. After several minutes Loki was still breathing heavily, but he found the energy to take his right hand away from behind Lillian’s head and place it on her stomach. This action spurred Lillian from her orgasm coma; with her eyes widening, she saw a faint green light emanating from his fingers. She jumped back from him instinctively.

“What the HELL are you doing?”

Loki spoke, “I know you don’t understand entirely, but I have magic, and I am using it to ensure the insane sex we just had doesn’t produce any illegitimate offspring. It’s to help you feel assured.”

“But you said Midgardian and Asgardian people can’t produce offspring.”

Loki shrugged, “Is caution ever a bad thing with a perfect stranger you just fucked?”

Lillian picked up his hand, pulling it towards her. Inspecting it, “Just checking for LCD lights or something weird like that.”

“I assure you, lady, it was my magic.”

“Well, I agree with what you said earlier; you don’t need it where it matters most.”

Lillian was laughing now, thinking about this gorgeous naked man in front of her, who had just fucked her better than any Earthman had even come close, and he was very inebriated to boot.

“Thank you, you better haste and put your dress back on; I sense the party goers stirring. It’s probably time for dancing, and they will look for me at least.”

“Why would “they” be looking for you?” Lillian said as she pulled her dress over her hips after finding it lying on a copy of “Asgardian herbal treatments for Visitors.”

“Oh, you know. People notice when I’m not around.” Loki said, winking again and maybe trying to cast a line Lillian’s way to see if she’d miss him or if there would be a round two later in the kitchen.

Just as they both looked marginally presentable, and Loki released the magic he had placed on the door lock, Thor burst into the library with his usual exuberance.

“Ah, brother, there you are. And I see you are with the journalist. We’ve been looking for her. Loki, have you two met officially yet?”

Loki and Lillian looked at the floor, to the ceiling, and then back to Thor with equally blank faces.

“Brother?” Lillian finally said aloud.

“Perhaps not then.” Thor laughed and bowed, his leather attire making stretching noises as he bent over.

“Loki, meet Lillian,”

Thor gestured with his long muscular arm toward Lillian. Thor continued, seemingly not noticing their facial expressions, “This is Lillian Devine; she’s here from Midgard to stay with our family. She’s writing a book about us for the Earth people, so we um, are more understandable to them, or something like that.”

“You're writing a book about us?” Loki said coyly.

Why had he thought the journalist was a man? Humored at what had just transpired both in his head and between their bodies, he passed his gaze on to Lillian, waiting for her to somehow help them both out.

“I am appointed by some very official people, I guess, and well, here we are.”

“Here we are.” Loki echoed into space.

He then sharply turned to Thor walking him back towards the library door, “Brother, thank you so much for the lovely introduction. Would you mind getting our guest some more of our special Asgardian punch? I think it might be just what the lady needs on this balmy night. She was just telling me how much she liked it.”

“Balmy? It’s getting chilly outside, brother. Are you feeling okay?” Thor looked over to Lillian, plastering a fake smile across her face with impeccable speed.

Ever the gentleman, Thor walked back to Lillian, “Lady, do you want something more to drink or is my brother speaking out of turn?”

“Oh Thor, sure, thank you. That would be so kind of you.”

“Alright then, I will be back shortly….”

Awkwardly Thor left both Lillian and Loki staring at one another.

“Oh, dear.” Loki finally spoke.

Lillian followed, “I guess I should have asked your name before we had sex?”

“I should have told you my name and who I was. This is my fault. I’m obnoxious and drunk. Would you believe it had been a while since I’ve done anything as crazy as meeting someone at our royal events and fully shagging them during it?”

Lillian wanted to believe Loki, but she wasn’t certain of anything. She had seen the ladies he had been talking to earlier, and she had succumbed to his swagger…

“Maybe?” Lillian finally shrugged while using one of the many library mirrors to check her still slightly messed up hair.

Loki stepped towards her, “I assure you, I am not lying. Much like yourself, It has been quite a while since anyone and especially a while since a human.”

Lillian wondered how to handle this and how to process one of the best orgasms of her life without jumping back into his arms and taking his clothes off once again while being the official royal journalist and having to write about this man!

Loki was also thinking about this new connection he had just made.

“We will be seeing one another quite a bit while you are writing this book, so we better find a way to keep this, us, um you know keep our relationship professional,” Loki offered.

“True enough Prince Loki, I’ll be looking into many closets and sweeping under the stairs, as they say; that’s going to be hard work. We shouldn’t complicate it by, um, continuing anything between us.”

“Oh! I didn’t mean stop seeing one another; we just have to keep it hidden.”

He said with yet another wink. This must be his thing, Lillian thought.

“Oh,” Lillian said, stepping closer to Loki and grabbing him by his leather collar.

“In that case,” she looked over her shoulder quickly to make sure no one was around, and Thor hadn’t yet arrived back with more of the famed Asgardian mead.

She then turned Loki’s head towards hers and kissed him deeply. She spun around and left the open door, leaving Loki speechless for once.

“Wait, what about more punch?” He called to Lillian.

But she was gone, heading back to the ball with a smile bigger than Ohio across her face.

On to Chapter 3