#you’d have to be a heartless monster to turn him down like you might as well just shoot Bambi’s mom all over again while you’re at it

[yeetlegay]

[taintedtort]

prompt ✧ you don’t say i love you back

characters ✧ albedo, kazuha, aether

warnings ✧ gn!reader, aether calls you honey

a/n ✧ this is a pt 2… albedo as promised (and yes i used kazuha‘s bday haiku, im unoriginal and hate poetry)

ALBEDO

✧ confused

the two of you were walking back to his cave in the snow, hands intertwined together with them both stuffed into one of albedos pockets. he insists he doesn’t need lots of layers, having been used to the cold for quite some time, but you force him to put on a coat anyway. he secretly thinks it’s endearing how you dote on him though.

you weren’t in a hurry. the wind was calm and there weren’t any monsters on this path, it was peaceful. the snow crunched under your shoes as you walked, the sound a harsh contrast to that of the quiet mountain.

you were lost in your thoughts until you saw albedo point past your head. you turned, expecting a monster, but instead found a pretty flower. you quickly recognized it as the flower albedo needed for one of his experiments.

you made a sound of enthusiastic surprise before pulling away from him to retrieve it. you stepped over sticks and rocks to reach it, carefully pulling at the stem.

once you got it, you stumbled your way back over to albedo, a huge smile on your face. you proudly presented the item, making a cheesy comment about you getting him flowers.

it was moments like these that made his heart swell with adoration towards you, and he couldn’t help but tell you just how he felt.

"i love you very much, you make me feel things i’ve never experienced before. thank you."

his words completely caught you off guard, making your cheeks heat up. you almost responded on instinct, but remembered your joke you’ve been wanting to try. you’ve been waiting for days, you couldn’t pass this opportunity to prank him!

you weren’t so heartless as to simply nod at his words, so you flashed a smile and pecked his cold cheek. you turned to keep walking and he followed, not saying anything else. if you could see his face, you’d see the confused furrow in his brow.

once arrived back to his warm cave, you sat on the bed. the walk into mondstadt was too long, your feet ached from the excessive walking as well as the cold.

while you lay with your eyes closed, you could feel albedo staring. you knew he most likely caught on to your joke and was trying to find the most likely scenario to your lack of response.

he doesn’t say it often, so he knows when he does it’s more special, that’s why you always make an effort to say it back. were you upset? no… there’s no indication youre angry with him. did you just not feel like it? maybe you didn’t feel the same amount of love for him in that moment that he did for you.

he tried to brush it off but couldn’t, he doesn’t like not knowing things. that reason was why he walked over and joined you on the bed instead of using the flower you picked for him to finish his project. when you felt him sink down next to you, you were a bit surprised. he doesn’t usually break from his experiments, especially after finally getting the last thing he needed after looking for so long.

he turned on his side and propped his head up with his hand, letting his other run through your hair. the action brought a content smile to your face. you let yourself relax for a moment before he spoke up.

"are you alright?"

you knew his words had another meaning, but you didn’t give in just yet. you told him you were great besides your feet hurting a little.

"…are you sure?"

his tone was quiet and cautious, not wanting to make you angry at him for pushing. obviously you would never get upset over something like that, but he was being careful.

when you looked at him he was staring at your face, his eyes filled with pure love, but his lips were bent down. his expression made your heart sink, you knew your little joke might upset him but it still made you feel terrible.

you instantly apologized and told him you loved him, turning on your side to face him before wrapping your arms around his torso, your face buried in his chest. you felt him exhale as he returned the embrace.

"were you just teasing me again?"

when he felt you nod he swore he felt ten times lighter. he was seriously worried for a second. he was sort of disappointed in himself for not catching on though, usually he could read you like a book.

"ah, i see. you got me."

KAZUHA

✧ instantly knew

you stood looking over the edge of the ship, staring at the seemingly endless ocean. the crew was bustling behind you, but you were used to the noise so it didn’t bother you.

you felt hands sneak around your waist and a chin rest on your shoulder, a calm voice muttering in your ear. instantly knowing it was kazuha, you turned in his embrace. greeting him with a smile and a quiet 'hi.'

"hi back. i was looking for you."

you smiled at the look on his face. totally smitten. he knew he looked like a lovesick idiot, but he didn’t care. you brought your hands up to his cheeks and smooshed them a little, asking what he needed you for.

"i want you to listen to my haiku, please."

you teased him a little, asking if it was about you, to which he responded with a nod. once you agreed, like always, his voice dropped into a smooth, quiet tone while he recited.

"sun and moon rejoice

birds of dawn sing songs anew

far from home, with you"

he smiled sheepishly when he finished, stating he knows he’s not very good but he tried anyway, like he always says. you shook your head and planted a kiss to his cheek, telling him you loved it and that it was beautiful.

"well thank you, i love you."

he punctuated his words with a firm kiss to your lips. when you parted and didn’t say anything back, he stared at you, scanning your face and waiting.

you tried to keep a straight face, not wanting to give yourself away. but when his staring became too much for you, you let out a huffy laugh, disguising it as a confused one as you furrowed your brow and asked him what was wrong.

he squinted at you accusingly, letting his arms let go of your waist and instead grab onto the side of the ship behind you, trapping you between them. he leaned closer to you, slowly. your heart sped up as you felt his breath on your lips. when he stopped short, hovering over your mouth and not connecting your lips to his, you decided to take the initiative. however, when you leaned forward, he leaned away.

your eyes, which were not all the way closed, opened fully as you huffed at his teasing. you leaned away from him and put your hands on his shoulders. he chuckled at your annoyed face, knowing you hated when he tricked you out of a kiss.

"i’ll let you kiss me if you just say it back."

you knew he knew you were messing with him, that’s why he had to tease you back. it was fair— but that didn’t mean you disliked it any less. with a sigh you apologized and repeated the phrase back to him.

he quickly leaned forward and captured your lips in his, kissing you passionately.

"see? that wasn’t so hard."

AETHER

✧ thought you were upset

you two were doing commissions together like normal. it wasn’t a hard one, aether doesn’t let you go with him on ones he deems too dangerous. you don’t blame him, he’s just a bit paranoid and protective after losing his sister. honestly, if anything it makes you feel safe and loved, knowing he cares about you. but then again you care about him just as much, you wanna be there to help him if he’s hurt! whenever you bring up that argument though, paimon pipes up, claiming she‘ll watch over your long haired boyfriend for you.

but one of those instances is not today. it was peaceful and calm. the commission itself was to find a specific location and take some photos for an old artist who couldn’t make the trip himself. easy stuff, just follow the directions and— oh, there’s a mountain.

"what— oh no. we don’t have to climb that do we?"

aether groaned, flipping frantically back through the directions, making sure you weren’t just supposed to go around it. he sighed and let the paper fall to his side as he realized that yes— you did have to climb the entire mountain, because the location was at the very top. the commissioner failed to mention that part.

you assured him that it’d be fine, saying that the reward you’ll get after will be worth it. which all in all… it really won’t be. it was severely underpaid for the height of the mountain.

"you’re sure you’ll be fine? you won’t fall, right?"

you heard the anxious tone in his voice and reassured him with a firm nod and a kiss on the cheek. he made you pinkie promise to him that you will not fall, and that if you feel yourself getting tired you’ll tell him so he can help.

after taking a deep breath, you both scaled up the mountain. you both had done this many times before, so you weren’t too worried. however, the sheer size of the structure was a bit unsettling.

to say you were relieved when coming to realize there were some cliffs to sit on for a break would be an understatement. you counted 4 total cliff sides that seemed to stick out enough to fit your body, so that’s how you paced yourself.

aether naturally noticed the same thing and followed your lead, hauling himself up onto each ledge and waiting for a few moments before continuing.

he was letting you lead, staying a little ways below you so he could react if you fell. he knew you’d be fine, you’d never fallen before and he didn’t think you would any time soon, but he still couldn’t help but worry just a little.

once you finally reached the top, you turned to pull aether the rest of the way up. but you failed to notice the steep hill that went downwards a few feet away from the ledge.

when you pulled him up, you took a couple steps back to ensure he didn’t fall back over the edge, causing you to lose your footing and tumble down the hill. you heard your lover shout out your name in concern while he tried to grab onto your arm, but he was a second too late.

leafs and sticks were pilled up, making it hard to find your footing. you continued sliding till you reached the bottom, covered in dirt and a few leafs. you heard aether running down after you, yelling out your name and asking if you were okay.

once he reached you, he knelt down, the panic clear in his eyes. his hand instinctively reached for your arm, gently holding it while doing a once over of your body.

"are you alright? i’m so sorry i let you fall! you didn’t break anything did you?"

you started laughing at yourself, kind of embarrassed that he just saw you roll down a hill. he didn’t find it funny though, not a trace of a smile making its way to his face. you had to reassure him that you were completely fine, and he still made sure to check every one of your limbs for broken bones, and even pulled your shirt up to examine your back for scratches.

once he was sure you weren’t seriously injured, he helped you up and took the leafs out of your hair and off your clothes, dusting the dirt off you in the process. after you were relatively cleaned off, he placed a firm kiss to your lips.

"archons… you scared me, i love you."

you flashed him a smile and replied with a simple 'yeah!' before moving around him to keep walking. you heard his hurried footsteps as he caught up to you, intertwining your fingers with his and pulling you to a stop.

"woah woah, what’s wrong? are you okay? seriously."

his expression was that of a kicked puppy, making your heart melt. his lips were turned downward and his eyebrows were drawn together, making his eyes look even softer than usual. you nodded at his questioning, telling him you were completely alright and that he didn’t need to worry about you.

he assumed you thought he meant if you were okay physically, so he quickly clarified with a defeated tone.

"i know you’re fine physically. but you didn’t say it back, is something the matter, honey?"

the nickname mixed with his hand tightly clutching yours was too much, you couldn’t take it. you pulled him into a tight hug and told him you were just teasing him. you said that you loved him more than anyone in the whole world and that he meant everything to you.

you followed up your words with a loving kiss to his lips, leaving him stunned. you noticed his ears reddening, but he quickly recovered and gripped your hand even tighter, moving in front of you to pull you along behind him.

"just teasing huh? i’ll get you back for that later."

[radicalbilly]

Best Friends Too

pairing: Billy Hargrove x reader

summary: Lines have already been crossed in your friendship, but what happens when you add a new proposition? + Friends Support Friends

words: 3,058

a/n: nsfw content! i have been a monster for not updating but i’m trying. really i am. please enjoy

warnings: 18+ nsfw content, fingering f!receiving, p in v intercourse, unprotected (sorry, pls wrap it), minors do not enter

Now Billy Hargrove was definitely the type to whip through the empty Indiana backroads, California had taken its toll on him. He just had never been the type to speed because a girl had called his house after his late shift at work claiming that she needed him. But this wasn’t just any girl. It was you.

So, now here he was, speeding down some hick backroad, blaring Def Leppard loud enough to piss off the Hawkins nightlife, and praying that his locker room shower had been enough to rid him of the sickly chlorine smell from the pool.

And Billy had been so antsy recently. He’d kissed you, in retrospect that wasn’t really the worst thing that he had done to you, but he couldn’t think of that either. Not when he was driving forty over the speed limit and this town was known for kids going on late night bike rides.

It’d been weeks since then and he could still hear the sounds you made and taste you on his tongue. You acted none the wiser, you stayed exactly as you were with him. “Best friends” you’d like to remind him. Max had a field day when she heard you call him that, asking briskly if you’d be braiding his hair at your next sleepover.

He remembered scowling at your mischievous grin and the way you waggled your eyebrows at her comment. He also remembered having to excuse himself to his room at the thought of your hands tugging at his hair again.

His hands tensed against the steering wheel as he turned onto your street.

Billy’s frustration had been manifesting itself in the worst possible way recently, he was almost constantly hard. It was becoming increasingly more difficult to hang out at your house. Especially when you’d wear less and less with the warming weather, last weekend, you had only worn his shirt to bed and panties that he hadn’t secretly stolen yet.

He parked down the street, not so far that he couldn’t see your house, but far enough that he could sneak through your backyard without catching any attention to himself. His fingers were cold when he ran them over his face and he tugged down the front of his jeans to relieve some of the pressure before swinging open the car door.

Billy stalked through your yard, trying to be hasty and cussing at himself when he tripped over his own feet.

It was dark and he followed the light from your bedroom window. He could see you through the window, looking at your own reflection in your mirror and mouthing the words to what he thinks might be a Blondie song.

He knocked against the glass, snorting to himself when you jump and turn to look at him. He sees your eyes roll and a heartless attempt at fighting off the grin that catches your cheek.

You’re already reprimanding him before you even finish pulling the window open.

“I told you to come in through the front door, Hargrove.”

He’s quick to the punch when he replies, “You also told me that it was an emergency.”

Your jaw drops in a scoff and you turn as he pulls himself into your room.

“It was an emergency,” Billy’s eyes look over you quizzically and he quirks his eyebrow at you. “Really,” you offer, your arms push out in front of you and you twiddle your thumbs, “I’m home alone and I am in need of emergency company so I don’t freak myself out.”

His expression doesn’t change, “You’re such a princess.”

“How dare you!” Your hand lightly swatted at him and despite the glare that you shoot at him, you both end up laughing at each other.

A new dance had occurred in your friendship, one that made the line between friends and more than friends muddy. One that made the hand that you swatted him with squeeze his bicep before running down the length of his arm and grabbing his hand. Your fingers laced with his and you tugged him towards you a bit.

“Are you gonna stay tonight?”

Billy looked over your face, smirking to himself. “I always stay with you. You made me promise that we were friends.”

“I didn’t make you, you just did because it’s true and you can’t live without me.”

His dimple began to show, but he didn’t say anymore. He instead lead you to your bed and had you sit while he turned on the television. He flicked through the vhs tapes that sat beside it, picking a movie and starting it before coming to set beside you.

His boots thudded as he kicked them off onto the floor. And he lifted himself a bit so that he could flip the light switch.

You liked how comfortable he was able to get with you now, how you hoped that he felt more at home with you than with anyone else. In the new darkness, you felt him cuddle in beside you.

The movie started slowly and unfortunately wasn’t doing its job at catching your attention. From your laying position, your eyes trailed around the room. Nothing took interest until you saw Billy’s hand. His fingers were lazily thrumming against the wooden foot of your bed and every now and again his middle and pointer finger would draw a circle before thrumming again.

Your mind drifted back to his mouth and fingers working in tandem against you and you felt your face grow hot. Warmth had begun to fill your stomach and you gave an experimental squeeze of your thighs.

Billy noticed the movement and moved his free hand to rest on one of the ankles that you had unceremoniously thrown into his lap once you both got comfortable. His thumb grazed over the skin there and you felt goosebumps prickle your skin.

The inner turmoil began to reach its head.

“Billy.”

His head turned to you before his eyes did, trying to catch just a few more seconds of what was on the screen. When he caught your gaze, you felt your breath stutter and your words fail.

“Have you-,” you stopped, contemplating the next few words that were looming in your mind, “Have you thought about that night?”

He pretended not to know, tilting his head despite the fact that his hands had gone entirely still. “Which night?”

“The night that you dug through my bedside drawer.” He continued to play coy, “The night that you fucked me with your mouth, William.”

Billy’s hand tensed on your ankle, he didn’t look at your face but he nodded in response. You took that as a good enough answer.

“Have you ever thought about doing more?”

His snapped over to your face and his eyebrows furrowed, “What do you mean?”

You tried to calm your racing thoughts, you wanted to sound more composed than you felt.

“You’re my best friend,” that was a start, he squinted at you, “you’re my best friend and I trust you more than anyone. And, I don’t know, Billy. I’ve been thinking about that night and how it made me feel.”

Billy only nodded in response, you could tell that he was in his thoughts. Debating on what he’d say when you finished your little speech.

You wanted to deflect, you knew Billy really wasn’t going to spill his guts in some over the top “chick-flick” gesture. You’d already caught acknowledgment of his fondness for you, and it usually didn’t come easily.

“It’d be a lot easier to get off without all the extra strings, and you were right about the toy,” Billy grinned in spite of himself, he’d never give up the opportunity to be right. “It’s also easier than getting a boyfriend or you being at risk of getting cooties,” he pinched your skin at that.

“I won’t get cooties and you won’t get a boyfriend if you keep hanging around me.”

“I know,” you agreed gently, “You’d get too jealous over me.”

Billy didn’t bother disagreeing with you, but his hand teased closer to your kneecap. He opened his mouth to speak, but ran his tongue over his teeth instead. His free hand swiped over his hair, “What exactly are you suggesting, Princess?”

You sat up, your hands moving to fiddle with his fingers that rested on your knee, “A mutually beneficial part two, I guess.”

“You want us to fuck each other,” Billy deadpanned.

“But I don’t want to ruin our friendship!”

It looked like he was mulling it over and you could feel his hips shift from beneath your legs. His smirk was primal, when he moved his face closer to yours, “You coulda told me that you wanted me to fuck you.”

You let go of his hand in favor of reaching up to his jaw, your thumb teased his lower lip. “I did, and you chose to use this pretty mouth on me.”

His pupils were blown and you could feel a new pressure against the back of your legs, but he still felt the need to stick his tongue out and lick your finger that rested on him.

Your thumb slipped higher, the pad of it pressing against his lower teeth, you could feel his light panting when he nipped at the skin. He was already glancing down to your lips by the time you asked if he was going to kiss you again.

“Do you want me to?” Billy wanted to hear it, for real this time. He wanted to know that you wanted to kiss him, that you wanted him pressed against you in every way.

“Please kiss me, Billy.”

He maneuvered himself so quickly that it made you breathless. Your thighs hooked over his hips and his arm under your lower back held you in an arch while he rolled against you.

Billy’s lips met yours in a bruising press and he waited for you to gasp to sweep his tongue into your mouth. Your hands tucked into his hair, earning a pleased groan from him.

You could feel the heat growing in your belly again, more so when Billy kissed down the side of your throat, stopping to nibble and suck at the skin there. He knew you’d be pissed at all the dark marks, but he never left them on anyone else regardless of how much he loved to see them.

“Lemme strip,” you huffed as he furthered his trail downward. He nodded, helping to pull you upwards into his lap so that you could take your shirt off. His eyes locked down on your chest and his hands raised to swipe and grope you over the cups.

“You too, Bill. It’s not mutual if I’m the only one without clothes.”

Billy grumbled out what sounded like an apology to your chest before he pecked one of your newly pebbled nipples and laid you back down onto the bed. You rested on your elbows so that you could watch him take his clothes off.

His fingers fumbled with his belt before he looked at you through his lashes, “Are you sure about this?”

You wanted to snip at him, something that would fit your playful banter with him, but you couldn’t. You were serious, you didn’t want him to question how you viewed him.

You sat up and replaced his hands with yours over his belt, you couldn’t look into his eyes when you said this. “Billy, I’m really sure. I know you’re gonna take care of me better than anyone in this stupid town. And I’m going to take care of you, right? It’s better than toys and better than fucking around with randoms.” Your fingers worked deftly with the belt, “We’re better for each other than anyone, really.” The sentence was punctuated with the snap of the belt being pulled from the loops.

Billy grinned like a cheshire cat as he kicked free of his pants and boxers. You held his eye contact, instead of looking down at him. He could tell that you were trying to maintain your composed air, he knew that he’d break you out it.

“Lean back,” he instructed while his fingers pressed against the top of your shoulder. When your back was laid flat, he rubbed his hands up over your thighs and gave testing squeezes to your hips and to the sides of your belly before undoing the button of your jeans and tugging them down your legs.

Billy stared down at you, lightly smacking the outside of your thigh so that you’d spread open more for him.

“Those are my favorites of yours,” he praised, his index finger pressing into your core over the black lace of your panties. He could feel how wet you were through the fabric and he felt his cock jump at the thought of what he’d get to do to you.

You whined as he applied more pressure. “I know they are,” your hips shifted so that he pull your panties down your legs, “I had to steal them back from your house.”

Your legs fell back open and Billy stood to admire the view. His fingers swiped through your folds and you hissed when his middle and ring fingers dipped into you. He curled and thrusted his fingers into you just until you started to rut your hips into his palm.

You nearly growled at him when he pulled his fingers from you, opting to pop them into his mouth and suck them clean. “I knew you were a fucking tease.”

He glared down at you, before grabbing your thighs and pulling you to him. “Quit bitching,” he huffed as he rubbed the tip of himself against you, “I gotta make nice with her before I fuck her.”

Billy’s shallow thrust into you knocked the words out of your throat, replacing it with a pitiful whimper. He gently shushed at you, rubbing his hands over your thighs and trying to steady his breathing. He leaned into you as he bottomed out, pressing your chests together and nuzzling his nose against the side of your cheek while he breathed hard through his nose.

You could feel the slight burn of how he stretched you in such a satisfying way, he was right, your toy had nothing on him. Your hips shifted and he let out a low pitched hum, “Billy, please.”

“Please what, baby?” He managed to tease.

His gaze lifted to yours and he watched your brows pinch together when he gave a slow roll of his hips.

You pouted up at him, clenching yourself on him to spur him to move. “Fuck me, Billy, please.”

“Awe,” he cooed at you mockingly, before rutting into you and placing a deep kiss onto your mouth, “You’re such a pretty thing, with such pretty manners.”

You glared up at him, “Fuck y-,” you were cut off by a sharp yelp when he set his brutal pace. He pulled a pillow from the head of your bed and slid it under your hips while he pulled almost completely out before slamming his hips to yours.

You were nearly babbling in response to the filth that was dripping from Billy’s tongue in between his heady grunts and panting. He had drug your arms over your head to hold with his hand and was praising your pussy like it had been made for him.

“Such a perfect cunt,” Billy whined into the side of your neck, while moving his thumb to draw lazy patterns over your clit.

You loudly whined out when he asked you how you felt, “So good.” Billy’s ego inflated at how worn your voice sounded, “Billy, I feel so full.”

“Baby,” he purred easily, you keened at the petname, “tell me where you want me to cum or else you’re gonna feel way more full.”

You whined loudly at that, imagining Billy pressed against you, fucking his cum deeper into you and growling out his praises.

“Inside,” it sounded breathless, you could feel your walls fluttering around him and Billy had started pressing into the part of you that had your eyes rolling into the back of your head. “Cum inside me.”

“Thank god, Princess.”

He followed the same pattern, angling his his hips and earning high pitched moans from your pouted and opened lips. He leaned to kiss you and released your hands which you used to rake down his back. You nearly sobbed into his mouth as you felt yourself tense at the peak of release.

The stutter of his hips against yours had you both panting into each other’s mouths, riding out your highs together and desperately clinging onto one another as Billy seated his hips against yours to rub his pelvic bone against your clit while he pressed his cum into you.

You both hissed at the over sensitivity when he finally pulled out of you. He stared down in adoration as he watched his cum slip from where he’d pumped it so deeply into you. Your leg twitched to kick at him when his finger wiped up the lost cum and pushed it back into you.

Billy knelt down to pick up the scattered clothes and he pressed a kiss to the outside of your knee. “Do you wanna get a shower?” he asked, already heading towards your bedroom door. You lazily nodded at him and he slipped out of the door.

You could hear his footfalls in the nearly silent house and when the spray of water hit the tiles on the floor of the shower. You’d nearly dozed off by the time he came to bring you to the bathroom.

It was so intimate, already crossing the borders of your new agreement when he loosely pulled your hair up with a clip and helped you step into the shower. He stood in front of the spray so that you wouldn’t have to worry about being pelted and he used your shampoo on his hair and placed your favorite body wash into your opened hand.

Billy knew that he didn’t have to wipe his sudsy hands against your back or rub the muscles there, he knew that it was more than friendly but he also didn’t care about that. He’d take whatever you were willing to give him, even if it was only best friends with added benefits.

Read Friends Support Friends for more!

[animeloverskylarmoon]

Mayuri Kurotsuchi (Bleach) - Chapter 1

“Is that her?”

“Shh, not so loudly, she might hear you.”

You really wish you could banish what you feel. But you suppose you prefer them viewing you as a coward rather than a monster.

The sight of a few of the captains walking brings an unsettling feeling and even worse memories.

“(Y/N)!!!!”

Rukia’s call echoed, her body trembling. She could see the blood.

So much.

The sword protruding from your chest should have you crippled, but you were still standing. Rukia was paralyzed as you stood over the hollow. Byakuya watched. His sword had been drawn for battle, but you were standing before what seemed like the last hollow, remorse not present on your face.

“W-Wait you heartless reaper w-wa-”

You rammed your hand through its mask, its body disintegrating shortly after.

This particular mission had taken a turn for the worse. It became apparent that these hollows were too much when one of them had managed to get a hold of your blade. The very sword that is now impaled in your chest. The second the captains were alerted of the chaos, they’d rushed over immediately.

If they expected anything, it wasn’t a reaper taking out hollows with their bare hands.

Toshiro was in a similar state of shock.

There were multiple indents in the ground and they could only assume you had something to do with it. Rukia’s body was beaten, and yours seemed much worse, yet you were still standing.

You finally turned in their direction and Toshiro had to admit he didn’t like the dead look in your eyes.

“We need to be careful, she could be dangerous.”

That’s the word he used that day.

“Dangerous..”

Any other reaper would have been praised for taking down six hollows single handedly. That was something the eleventh squad members loved to boast about, but you’d practically begged the head captain to keep it all a secret. Every reaper below the title of captain was unaware of your situation.

Rukia was the only one who knew because she’d seen it first hand.

You wish that you could rid it, the terrified look she wore. When you finally gained consciousness, you woke up in squad four and you were circled by captains. All of which were looking at you as if you would strike at any moment.

You hated it, and you knew it wasn’t intentional. But you couldn’t help but feel like the enemy.

Like something that should be eradicated.

You kept your eyes forward as you stepped into twelfth division, you were greeted by Nemu and of course that crazy scientist.

“Ah, if it isn’t my favorite experiment."

He twiddled his fingers in that creepy way, smiling in a way that always had an unpleasant chill rushing up your spine.

“Please don’t do anything weird Kurotsuchi-taicho.”

Yesterday he’d literally made markers on your body when you fell asleep. You had to check just to make sure he hadn’t stolen an organ while you were just trying to catch a nap.

“I am only conducting the necessary experiments to fully study your healing. Nemu, bring me the syringe.”

“Hai, Mayuri-sama.”

She picks up the item from the table, walking over as she hands it to him.

“Sorry for the discomfort.” Nemu says beforehand.

The needle is quite long. You just give her a smile.

“Compared to the crazy stuff he’s already stuck inside me, I think the needle is the least of my problems.”

You hold out your arm, and Mayuri takes your wrist, injecting you with who knows what. His eyes are firmly planted on your form. More specifically, your lack of reaction. He casts a look in Nemu’s direction, and she nods soundlessly. You raise a brow with a tilt of your head.

Mayuri retracts the needle, dropping it into a nearby bin.

“Interesting.”

He reaches for a small clipboard, taking notes. When he’s done, he rips the sheet off, handing it to Nemu.

“Please send this to Akon.”

“Yes, Mayuri-sama.” She takes it, walking away. When the door shuts behind her you sit there waiting.

“Are we done?”

“For now. Return tomorrow.”

You nod, standing as you stretch your arm experimentally. The needle has left some residual blood, and you stare at it.

“We cannot take a chance of sending her on missions until this situation is dealt with. We have no way of telling who she sees as an ally or enemy in that state.” Toshiro argued.

All you could do is stand there as the captains decided whether or not you were fit to do your job.

“I can run the necessary tests to ensure that we have no reason to eliminate her.”

The choice of words made your eyes widened and Jushiro stepped forward, clearly displeased.

“She is not something to be removed!”

“Regardless of your personal views, we are unaware of what she’s capable of. I can help. Let me test her.”

Looks were exchanged around the room. No one really trusted Mayuri not to carry out crazy experiments, but the uncertainty seemed just as unnerving to them.

“Very well, starting today you will be in Mayuri Kurotsuchi’s care.”

You just bowed your head.

“Yes, I understand.”

It was painful watching them decide your faith like that.

You had no say in anything. In a way, you’re grateful to Mayuri. Not just for his input, but possibly his indifference. You chuckle, and he turns at the sound.

“Is something funny?”

He sounds a bit annoyed, probably because you haven’t left yet.

“It’s nothing really, it’s just that you’re probably the only one who doesn’t look at me like a monster.”

You smile, but there is nothing humorous about it.

Mayuri just watches you.

“You’re quite stupid.”

“H-Hey!!”

He waves his hand casually.

“Why would I look at such a precious specimen like a monster? Your entire makeup is exquisite. You can’t expect a simple minded being to understand the extent of your power. Fear of the unknown is for foolish beings who lack the understanding of how the world works. Do not insult my intelligence.”

You can’t really say much because that’s probably the nicest thing that this mad scientist has ever said to you.

Looking down, you can’t help but flush. Him of all people shouldn’t be the one giving you a pep talk. This guy is pretty much a maniac.

Maybe that’s the lesson.

Monster, mad scientist..maniac.

Maybe the problem is the labels that are used to perceive things that are different.

Despite yourself, you smile, shaking your head.

“Arigatou, Kurotsuchi-taicho.”

He looks over at you, and the smile that you wear just makes him click his tongue.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself. “

You still smile.

“Hai!”

There might be more to your abilities than what you initially thought. 

[dagothventing]

It feels almost strange, not being able to talk to you anymore. I feel no remorse for what I did, leastways as far as myself and my mental state are concerned.

What i feel for you, though? Endlessly lingering doubts, wonderings. Was any of this real for you? Perhaps it was too real. Your “love” for me became akin to obsession near the end: a stifling, strangling thing. Clawing, gnashing, ripping, tearing at me. Begging me to stay. Begging me to keep you around.

But I couldn’t. For either of us.

We’ve both suffered our collateral damages. I’d like to say I lost that boy, the one that latched himself to me all those years ago. But I’d be lying. I felt him drifting long before he came to the edge of the waterfall, taking whatever memories we shared together down into the plummeting depths where neither of us could reach the other again.

Not that I’d want to. Even when it turns out I was right about you. A dog he might be, but loyalty he still needs to learn. I’ve already forgiven him, but because of us, he is forsaken. I will not reach an apologetic and understanding hand out to him. I will not risk betrayal at his hand again.

For my sake. I won’t.

I wish I could say I miss you. But that would be a lie too. We both changed within the last year. Our paths diverged, and your desperation to keep them converged is what terrified me in the opposite direction. I don’t think I’d intended for it to be permanent, not like this. But that desperation, that lack of understanding as to the time I needed to heal and figure myself out again, it made me want to have nothing to do with you. It was an ugly side of you I never wanted to see. But then again, you’ve seen your fair share of ugly sides from me. You still found “love” for me.

I couldn’t do the same.

You might think it’s heartless. Maybe you’d be right. If I cared to listen to the lingering languages of your manipulations, I might think myself heartless too. But the whispers don’t bother me like I thought they would. I know myself. I know the truth. Everyone else sees it, your erratic behavior, bordering on psychotic.

Everyone but you and the few people whose perspectives you’ve twisted beyond all belief. Sycophants.

Now I wonder what the truth is between you and Alejandra. Not that it matters now. A certain quote keeps ringing in my head.

“I'm beginning to wonder that if, when we call a woman crazy, we should take a look at the man by her side, and guess at what he has done to drive her to insanity.”

I wonder if she truly was crazy, if you drove her to insanity, or if it’s an awful cocktail of the two. I suppose I’ll never know.

And yes, your behaviors reminded me of my sperm donor’s.

You have no idea the horrors etched into my mind since I was a child. You have no idea what it’s like for someone who never loved you to use you to get back at someone who does. You’ve never been cannon fodder for a master manipulator, a true narcissist, like I have.

You have no idea how horrifying it was to watch someone I loved, someone whom I wanted so badly to marry, turn into the monster that haunted my nightmares since I was a child. A monster I thought I’d grown out of being afraid of.

It’s funny how the darker parts of life have ways of dredging those accursed memories back from the depths of whatever high security mental vault you shoved them into. You have no idea the instability I’m experiencing again because of you and him.

I barely eat or drink. I’ve been having blood sugar lows so badly, I feel like I might faint. Mom’s worrying, and so is my tribe. I’m glad I can sleep, but even then, my dreams are plagued by varying, vivid prophetic dreams. If it’s not the lack of appetite that makes me nauseous, it’s the dreams. If not the dreams, then the lack of appetite.

It’s a vicious circle I cannot escape from.

[yzafre]

just promise you won't let me go | Axel 2

AO3

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It went like this: Xion was a replica.

This explained – well, it explained more than it didn’t, Saïx’s hang-ups about her chief among them.  Axel hadn’t seen the Riku replica as much more than a toy before the whole nonsense went Xion went down, and without that knowledge –

It went like this: Saïx, thanks to Axel’s last attempt to reach out, now knew that replicas could gain a personality.  Axel wasn’t sure what the consequences of that were, but Saïx certainly didn’t looked pleased about it.  He said it was because Naminé was attached to the replica, but –

It went like this: Axel… might have screwed himself over.

It went like this: he was sent on a mission the day after his discovery about Xion, still reeling.

He never thought he’d see the word “Replica” again, not after the disaster of Castle Oblivion.  He should have known there were more – the exceptional copying functionality, the ability to form a sense of self, that doesn’t happen on a first try.  But Xion?  He never even noticed.

It didn’t answer all his questions.  It barely answered any, actually – who?  Why?  And what was happening to her?  Some facsimile of anxiety gripped him as he followed Roxas onto a world of scattered islands, mind whirling, and blinked away the light of the sun.

Apparently, this was where Roxas had flown before, though Axel remained skeptical given his absolute failure to cough up proof.  Except then a literal fairy showed up, sprinkled dust over them, and poof, Roxas was floating.  Axel stumbled away, the sight of him flying throwing him for a loop but okay, okay, it really wasn’t like any flight he’d ever seen.

I can fly, and boom, huh?

It was true.  His feet left the ground, and he was flying.  He never thought he’d get the chance, never thought he’d touch the skies without a heart, but here he was.  A distant ship stared firing at them, and Roxas’s little friend flew off.  Axel had to catch his wrist before he followed because seriously, please, stop running straight towards danger.  He re-oriented Roxas towards the mission, and together, they flew.

They circled the skies together, working in tandem to dive-bomb heartless, swooping in from every direction.  Axel rained fire from above, laughter rumbling out of him as the monsters scattered below, only to be knocked back together as Roxas lunged in turn.  The area cleared, Roxas spiraled up, feinting right by Axel before piercing up towards the sun.  Axel blinked up, breath catching because silhouetted in the sunlight, the light of the sun blurring around his shoulders and bobbing in flight it almost looked –

They finished the mission, and Axel returned feeling like he’d been struck by lightning.

Roxas remained thrilled, chattering on about the possibilities as they waited for Xion.  The image struck Axel, the three of them flying together, spiraling around each other, and it –

It went like this: while on a mission, Axel spotted a ghost in a faded red cloak.  He followed her for a while, shadowing her steps until, when she peered around a corner, he caught a flash of familiar blue eyes.

Curious, he strode forward, stopping to loom over her from behind, “Now, what are you doing here?”

She startled, staring up at him in shock, “Axel.”

“Naminé,” he returned, eyes drifting over her form, lingering on the sickly purple staining her fingertips and streaking the hair peeking from her hood, “You’re not looking so good.”

She curled in on herself, quickly tucking her hair away before pulling her hands beneath the cloak.

“There’s only two ways I know of to get around worlds like this, you know, and I doubt you have a ship,” he observed.  She looked away, refusing to say anything, and he sighed, “That’s a dangerous move, walking the dark without anything to protect you.”

“I know,” she murmured, “But I have to.”

“Have to, huh?  I thought you’d be focused on putting Sora back together, what with the replica dead.”

“Hitoshi’s not dead,” she snapped, before flinching back.  Shooting him a frightened glance, then a resigned sigh, she moved to sit in the shade of the wall, “He’s not gone forever, not – not dead.  He’s just… lost.  Scattered.  I have to find him.  I have to.  If I can put him back together… everything will be okay.”

“You sure about that?”

“Mm,” she nodded, “We’ll be together again.  That will make everything okay.”

He sighed, sliding down the wall to sit near her, “I know that feeling, I suppose.  I’ve got my own people to keep track of these days, and they don’t make it easy.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.  They’re good, they’re great, but something of a handful.  Though…”

He paused, unsure if he wanted to continue.  But, what the hell, it’s not like he could tell anyone else about this.

“One of them – I’m worried.  I’m not sure they’re safe where they are, but then, it’s not safe to leave, either.  And they’re getting close to realizing their position, and I’m worried they’ll do something… desperate.  I’ve got to find a way to keep the situation under control before that happens.”

He could feel her gaze on him, but determinedly kept his eyes closed.  Eventually, she shifted in the silence.

“I could help,” she offered quietly.

He scoffed, “Oh, really?  What makes you say that?”

“I know a bit about putting a replica back together.”

His blood froze.  Slowly, so slowly, he turned to stare down at her, watched her limbs lock up in fear beneath his stare, “…who said anything about a replica?”

When she didn’t answer, he began pushing to his feet, looming over her, “What, exactly, do you know about Xion.”

She flinched back, creeping to her feet, inch by inch, eyeing him warily, “Sora’s memories stopped flowing.  I had to find out why.”

“Sora’s memories?” he asked, processing frantically, desperately trying to form his words because he needed to get as much as he could while she was off-balance, had to work quickly, “But she’s never been near Sora, I’ve kept them away from Castle Oblivion Oblivion, she and Roxas –“

He cut off at her flinch, another piece clicking into place, “Roxas.  Xion is connected to Roxas, and Roxas is connected to Sora.”

Okay.  Okay, now he was getting answers – but someone else had the answers, too.  If it was just Naminé he wouldn’t be so worried, but – the imposter wandering the worlds, the one he’d found out Saïx sent Xion after, the imposter who was Riku.

“What did you tell Riku?”

“Nothing!” she cried, “But DiZ is getting impatient.  I had to find her before they realized.”

“DiZ?”

“He’s –“ Naminé took a long, deep breath, finally slowing down.  He could almost see her putting her mask back together, regaining her composure and sense of calculation, deciding how much to give.  It would be harder to get his answers now, with her mind back in the game, “He’s helping restore Sora.  He’s… invested.”

“Invested, hm?  And what’s his opinion on the replica stealing Sora’s memories.”

“It – “ she hesitated, a hitch of her breath, “It doesn’t matter.  I just have to take her to Sora, and I can separate them out before it’s too late.”

“To Sora, right, where your impatient friends are waiting.  I suppose they’ll be just fine with this.”

“They don’t have to know.”

“Uhuh.  And how, exactly, did the replica die?  Because the Organization sure didn’t kill him.”

“He’s not dead!”

“Well, he sure isn’t here, either.  No.  I’m not letting them anywhere near Sora or the Castle; I’ve got enough threats to watch for already.”

She clenched her fists, glaring up at him, “That’s not your choice.  It’s hers.”

He hissed in a breath, baring his teeth right back at her, “You know, Saïx has been pretty keen on getting his hands on you.  I’ve turned a blind eye so far, but if I see you around Xion, I might not be so generous next time.”

His piece said, he turned, summoning a corridor.

“At least tell her,” Naminé called after him plaintively.

“What, because that worked out so well for you?” He tossed over his shoulder.

She flinched, but met his glance with a determined stare, “It did.  Maybe it didn’t save us, but it made things better.  It gave us a chance."

He scoffed, “Not enough to save you, in the end.  I won’t make your mistakes.”

“She’ll find out,” Naminé called after him as he stepped into the corridor, “They always do.”

It went like this: Axel may have had the passion of fire, but Xion had the determination of the tides, and she was always going to start asking questions.

She started asking about Castle Oblivion, and Axel danced around the subject, evaded the topic, because nothing good happened there, under no circumstances did he want her anywhere near that castle.  Especially not now, especially not when she was already unwell, not when she got so dizzy she nearly fell from the tower.

Roxas caught her.  Roxas caught her, pulled her up, and Axel shuffled closer, hovering over the two as they shivered together.  Roxas looked scared, and Xion looked bleak, and he wished he could just make all of this go away, wished he could just bundle them up, take them away from this place –

“Got it!”

He would.  A trip to the beach, all three of them, just the three of them, a day that was just for them and no one else, no agenda or purpose other than to be.  It would happen, one day; the three of them.

He watched as darkness grew in her eyes, day by day, a storm he’d seen once before as the Riku Replica self-destructed catastrophically.  The dam would break, if something wasn’t done, and he feared it would wash them all away.  So he picked at her attention, pushed her towards Roxas, watched as she relaxed under his soft eyes and warm care, settling a little bit more in the glow of his smile.

He just needed to hold it off a little bit longer, just until he figured out how to fix this.

They were assigned a mission together, hunting a target heartless in a distant world.  Between battles and searching, he needled and poked at her, aiming to make her laugh - his own, secret mission.  It worked, slowly, beating back the shadows from her eyes, a brilliant grin lighting her face as she met him barb for barb.

But then he turned, and her face was pale, a clinging fear creeping it.  He reached for her, but the world erupted, their target springing up between them.

Xion was as stunning in action as ever, but, but – there was something in the way she moved, a familiarity itching at his brain, first here, then there, a memory just out of reach.  It distracted him, and in the moment he looked away the heartless lashed out, sending him careening over the edge of a cliff.

He gasped, dug his chakram into the dirt to slow his fall, managed to claw his fingers into a crevice only a foot down.  Above, there was a heart-rending scream, then the pained screech of the heartless.  He clung, shivering, to the edge, as the sounds of battle grew in fervor.  The dirt crumbled beneath his hands, his footholds slowly eroding away.

Finally, silence.  It held for several long seconds before frantic footsteps sped towards him, Xion’s face appearing over the edge, eyes wide with terror.  She reached down, hands wrapping around his wrist and pulling.  He tried to aid her, tried to push up towards solid ground, but the rocks and dirt beneath his foot gave way and instead both of them slipped down.

He swallowed, realization thrumming through him, vibrating through his limbs, strangling his lungs.  He wasn’t getting out of this.  She didn’t have the strength, didn’t have the leverage to pull him up.  Trying would only take her down with him.

“Xion,” he said, “Xion, you have to let go.”

“No,” she snarled.  Her eyes gleamed and the halo of the sun grew brighter around her, till he could almost swear it was coming from her, instead, expanding out in streaks that almost looked like, like –

And then the light moved.

He was pulled upwards with a lurch, stumbling onto solid land, unable to take his eyes of Xion as spectral wings faded from existence.  What color were they?  He couldn’t see, couldn’t tell through the glare of the light, feared they blended in because they shared the warm yellow of the sun, of the Keyblade wielder.

The Organization turned the first replica into a copy of Riku.

The Organization wanted Xion to gain Sora’s memories for a reason.

The Riku Replica didn’t have wings – that was a whole thing, caused them of host of issues.  The Riku Replica didn’t have wings, but then, he only got the one set of memories, and who knows what happened to him at the end/  Xion had out-lived him by months, and if she truly was pulling from Roxas, constantly taking from Sora like he feared, then –

“Axel?” She asked, voice wavering, but soft and familiar and hers, not Sora, not anyone else.

He gasped in a breath, suddenly realizing he wasn’t breathing and lurched forward, pulling her into his arms and burying his face into his hair, frantic nonsense dropping from his mouth.

No.  No, he wouldn’t let them.  Forget replicas and nobodies, their goals and schemes, hearts and keys, Xion was Xion, she was his friend.  Nothing else.  He wouldn’t let them turn her into anyone else.  He’d cut them off at every avenue.

He pulled back, holding her shoulders, meeting her eyes desperately, fingers trembling.

“We’re going to be okay,” he promised, “Just stay with me.”

It was one thing to make that promise, another entirely to keep it.

Xion became more and more skittish, after that day.  She avoided him, she avoided Roxas, not even the blonde’s sad, bereft gaze enough to make her stay.  She didn’t even come to the clock tower anymore.

Saïx, he noticed, was watching her just as closely.  But he watched her like a predator, like a threat, tearing into her at the slightest infraction.  Axel tried to get between them, tried to cajole his old friend into a better mood with every trick he knew.  All it resulted in was both his and Xion’s assignments getting worse, and Saïx’s gaze freezing over a little more.

They were nearing a breaking point with no escape in sight, so when Saïx sent him back to Castle Oblivion, he grasped the chance with both hands.

There had to be something he could do.

It went like this: When Axel heard the front doors of Castle Oblivion creak open, he knew.

He rushed down the stairs, burst into the entrance hall, found her wailing on her knees until her breath gave out and she could only make short, choked breathes.  He hit the floor so hard he knows his knees will bruise, reaching out for her when –

It wasn’t like the spreading of wings he remembers watching in his childhood, where feathers sprouted up and out in a fountain and shimmer of lights, blooming carefully.  This wing was simply there, then not.  A wing, singular, pale but for the dusted ends, flickering in and out of existence as if it wasn’t sure it should exist.

It shouldn’t, he decided, something cold dripping from the void where his heart should be.  Wings only came from the heart, and the only heart in this Castle needed to stay far, far away.

He let that cold spread like ice through his veins, a wall between him and that burning thing inside him.  This could not be allowed to continue; he would force it to stop.  She would not take one step closer into the truth, not when it would break her in two between its jaws.

“Axel,” she breathed as she looked up, eyes clearing, “What are you doing here?”

“Just have my orders, that’s all,” he answered lightly, but more importantly, “Xion, there’s nothing for you here.”

Her eyes flashed as she snarled up at him, “Liar!  I came from here, I know it!”

So she’d figured that much out?  No, no – if she truly knew, she wouldn’t phrase it that way.  A hunch, then, one he needed to dismiss, ignore.

“Don’t you have a mission?“ he asked, pushing to his feet, “What do you think will happen if you don’t complete it?  Don’t be selfish.”

“Or else they’ll turn me into a Dusk?” she sneered.

Did she think they wouldn’t?  “They’ll do worse than turn you into a Dusk; they’ll just destroy you.”

He reached down, offering a hand, but she ignored it, pushing violently to her feet, “And is that because I’m useless?”

“You might be to them!” he snapped.  She didn’t get it – she didn’t get it.  Larxene might have been particularly cruel in her taunting of the Riku replica, but he had no doubts her opinion would be shared by the Organization at large – a broken toy should be disposed of.  Only he, and to some extent now Saïx, knew how replicas could be more.

He was beginning to think that was one person too many.

“Pushing this isn’t worth it,” he said, “Nothing good comes from this place.”

“I came from this place!” she insisted, “I need to know why.”

He wanted to scream.  He settled for a long, measured breath, “What does it matter?  Roxas doesn’t know where he came from, either.”

“Roxas doesn’t care!” she yelled, bitterness dripping from her voice, before pressing a hand to her face, shuddering, “I’m remembering things, Axel.  I have memories of back when I was human.”

No; no, she did not.  “Well, stop remembering.  Nothing good will come of it.”

She shook her head, “I have dreams every night, and you’re in those dreams, Axel!”

“Then they sure aren’t memories.  How can I be a part of your past?  They’re just dreams, that’s all.”

“You can’t fool me!” she cried, “We’ve met before, right here in this castle!  We fought, a-and you captured me, caught me looking at something I wasn’t supposed to, you – “

“No, we have not – I have not,” he snapped, leaning in, holding her shoulders.  How – how did she have those memories?  Not Sora, they couldn’t be, but the other replica, how – “I didn’t do any of that to you.”

She stared back, and he squeezed her shoulders, softening his voice, “Let’s go home, Xion.  Don’t keep Roxas waiting.”

“Please, Axel,” she begged, eyes wide, “You’ve got to help me.  It’s taking over everything, I can’t go on like this.  I need to know who I am.”

He tried to come up with an answer, another way to dissuade her, but she shook herself free and moved towards the door.

There was no thought behind the next movement, pure panic, striking out with practiced movements to hit the base of her neck, letting her collapse into his arms.  He held her close, breaths coming fast and heavy.

He was trembling.

“Sorry, Xion.  But it’s for the best.”

She woke not long after he settled her in her bed.  He watched carefully as her gaze tried to focus on him.

“What happened?” she asked.

Tension drained from him, and he finished tucking the blankets around her.  She didn’t remember.  Hopefully, it would stay that way.

“You don’t remember?” he asked, “You lost consciousness on today’s mission.  I brought you back.”

“O-oh, I can’t…”

“That’s okay,” he said softly, reaching out to smooth away a flyaway lock of hair, “Just get some rest.  I’ll take care of everything.”

Her brow wrinkled in discontent, but she sunk back into the bed, eyes staying closed longer with every blink.  Finally, she went limp with a little sigh, and he leaned over her, exhaustion creeping up on him.

“Just a bit longer,” he said, pleading with her, with the universe, hell, with the growing Kingdom Hearts in the sky, “Let me have this, just a little bit longer.”

It wasn’t enough.  Of course, it wasn’t, nothing he did was ever enough.  A week later, and she was gone.  And unlike the last time, she was actually reported missing during a meeting, orders coming from on high not to look from her.

Roxas protested, but Axel just watched.

“All will be revealed when the time comes,” Xemnas assured.

Hmm… Which means, if the time doesn’t come, things can stay as they are…

Whatever their plans were, he just needed to stall them out, as long as possible.  A delicate balancing act, but one he could manage, if he could just get the situation under control.

“Lord Xemnas has spoken,” Saïx said, his gaze pressing down on Axel like a weight, “Obey, or face your end.” 

It went like this: The first step of getting the situation under control was actually knowing what the situation was, starting with figuring out where Xion went.

No one was supposed to go after Xion, whatever, whatever, if they didn’t want him to sneak past their noses, they shouldn’t have made his job sneaking past people’s noses.  Every bit of logic said she should be at Castle oblivion, but he’d been scoping the place out, had crawled the Castle from top to bottom, and he couldn’t figure out how she’d have gotten in.  By the time several days had passed, he knew she had moved on, if she had ever been there at all.

He returned to the clock tower, that night, but –

He couldn’t make himself approach, couldn’t turn the final corner and take his place next to Roxas, not when things had fallen apart.  He knew the dangers, knew she was close to breaking, and he still couldn’t stop her, still couldn’t keep them safe.

Instead, he turned around, returned to his room.

He’d keep looking tomorrow.

For a full week, he continued to search, finishing his missions in record time so he could prowl the worlds.  He wasn’t sure it was safe for her to return, not right now, not when Xemnas seemed pleased to let her run wild.  But at the very least he needed to know where she went, how much she found out.  If he just knew that much, he could do some kind of damage control.

He could only imagine what she would think, what type of ideas she would get in her head, if she managed to find any hint of Vexen’s notes, any information on the replicas.  Their treatment of the replicas, his own treatment of the Riku Replica, was, well it was –

Oh, hell.

Saïx stopped him, somewhere in the middle of it all.  Commented on how late he’d been staying out, asking where he’d been, asking if he wasn’t doing anything he wasn’t supposed to, was he?  And Axel hemmed and hawed, danced around the subject, because of course he wasn’t, he’d never – !

But then – but then Saïx started talking about Xion.  How she was dangerous, causing trouble, a threat to their plans.  How it would be better for everyone if she were, perhaps, removed from the situation.  Axel deflected, gave no answers, nothing Saïx was clearly looking for, because he leaned in, gaze sharp and intent and said – Roxas, especially.

“What?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know,” Saïx said, “The replica is designed to drain power from Roxas, to be a backup, in case the Key of Destiny proved uncontrollable.  We have never needed both.”

He didn’t know, actually, Saix for once over-estimating his information gathering abilities, but like hell was he going to prevent Saïx from sharing, so he set his jaw, glanced away, shrugged back – enlighten me – old, old tells of stubbornness, of denial, let Saïx read them and seize upon the perceived opening.

“Left alone, the puppet will destroy Roxas.  It just takes and takes, until there is nothing left.  It doesn’t know how to do anything else.”

And he – he saw it, crystal clear.  Saïx wanted Xion dead.  He wanted Axel to want it, too.  And it made sense – as a replica with draining powers, out of control draining powers, she was a threat to Roxas.  Axel, he’d do anything to keep Roxas safe, and removing Xion, that was the fastest way to do it, but.

But.

It was the three of them, all three of them, they were best friends.  To have one without the other, it, it wasn’t –

It was wrong, there were supposed to be three of them, always three of them, they were –

“Don’t worry; you know me,” Axel murmured, face calm and controlled and hunting, satisfaction burning at the wary victory in Saïx’s eyes, “I’m not about to take risks with something this important.”

He ran himself ragged for a week, but found no trace of her, collapsing into bed to dream fitfully, a montage of fiery colors and flashing lights, Xion’s forlorn voice.

Is it that I’m not supposed to exist?

He woke, disoriented and aching, stumbled through his mission in a fog.  Unbidden, he found his feet dragging him to the clock tower after work was done, dropping into his seat beside Roxas.

Maybe it was Roxas mentioning the same dream, maybe it was the way tension slipped from him the longer he sat there, maybe it was the way he felt like he could breathe for the first time since he saw Xion at Castle Oblivion, but he found himself sharing about his efforts to find Xion.  Found himself asking Roxas to join him.

It was dangerous.  It was so dangerous, it was truly insubordination, no matter how light he made of it, and the path would lead them far too close to places he wanted to keep Roxas away from, but, but –

He was so tired of being alone.

He was good at that, once, good at working alone, but these months had worn away years of practice and he found he couldn’t quite stomach it anymore.

They looked.  They looked and they looked and they looked, but as Axel feared, nothing turned up.  Wherever Xion found, she was doing an annoyingly good job of not being found.

Eventually, as all things seemed to do, their path turned to Castle Oblivion.

Roxas brought it up.  Axel tried to shut down the conversation, but there was a mulish, thoughtful look in his eye, and he knew this wouldn’t be the end of things.  Sure enough, the next day Roxas sat next to him at the clock tower, quiet and anxious and twitchy, fidgeting with his hands and sending him pitiful little glances.

“Uhm, Axel… about Castle Oblivion?”

Axel sighed.  He’d never known Roxas to be this tenacious about anything, but he could tell from the look in his eyes, he wasn’t going to let this go, for once.  Not as long as Xion was missing.

Maybe he didn’t have to.

Roxas usually let things go, but then, Axel usually gave him some sort of answer, even if it was half-hearted (ha).

Castle Oblivion was empty, and really, Roxas only cared about the place because he thought Xion might be there.  Take him in, get him out, he gets it out of his system and that’s the end of this mess.

Damage control.

“Alright then,” he said, lazily waving a hand to summon a corridor, “Let’s go.”

“What?  Really?” Roxas asked, staring up with wide eyes as Axel pushed to his feet, “To Castle Oblivion?”

“Well, I can’t just let you go on your own.”

It went like this: They didn’t find anything in Castle Oblivion.

They barely made it six feet past the door, in fact, when Roxas began to stumble, clutching his head

“Roxas!” He clamped a hand around his shoulder, trying to keep him stationary and standing, even as the keyblade wielder weakly pushed forward against his hand.

“My… my head.”

“Easy, man,” he murmured, mind racing, he knew this was a bad idea, “Let’s retreat for now, and – “

“I’m fine!” Roxas snapped, somehow managing to shake free, “We have to… find Xion.”

On the next step he collapsed, and Axel rushed forward to drop in front of him, cradling his shoulder.

“What’s happening?” Roxas whimpered.  Axel ducked his head, trying to meet his eyes, when a flash of white caught his attention.  He looked up, and felt the breath punch from his lungs.  A single wing stretched from his back, flickering in and out of existence.  The same pale expanse he’d seen on Xion, tips dipped in dusty brown, how could he have forgotten about this?  Risked this?  He couldn’t breathe, could only watch as it phased in and out of existence, there then not, over and over and –

“So much… rushing into… my head,” Roxas grit out, and Axel jolted back into motion, curling a hand around to swing Roxas’s arm over his shoulder, hauling him to his feet.

“Let’s,” he swallowed the lump in his throat, hissing in a shaky breath, “Let’s get out of here for now!”

“No, wait!  There’s… something… I can… almost…”

Axel snarled, pulling him closer.  Forget the danger of the Superior, and all Saïx’s plans, nothing was more of a threat than this, this place, trying to rip out their minds and replace them with someone else.  He’d drag them both home, keep them close, where at least he could keep an eye on them, where at least the threat was something he could fight.

He refused to lose them to Sora.

Roxas woke up with Riku’s name on his lips.

Axel seethed.

He managed to bundle Roxas back home, forcefully keeping his panic about Sora’s wings and Sora’s memories and Sora’s friends at bay, stumbling through a transaction with the busy-body lady running the ice cream stand, finally taking a seat up at the clock tower.

Finding Xion really was turning out hopeless.  Whatever she’d found out – and at this point he just needed to assume “everything” – she wasn’t handling it well.  This would be so much easier if she’d just come home, let him know and let him handle everything rather than running off on her own, but.  Well, at this point they would have to wait.  If they pushed much more Saïx would eventually find evidence of what they were doing, which would only add fuel to the fire of whatever vendetta he had against her.

He'd just have to keep an eye out.  He could fix this.  He could.

Roxas found Xion first, which was – being perfectly honest – less than ideal.  Even worse, he came back and spilled all about it right in front of Saïx.  And the worst-case scenario: Xion was seen with the Imposter.  The perfect excuse for Saïx, who could spin it – wanted to spin it – towards her demise.

He watched Roxas and Saïx go back and forth, keeping his face blank because he couldn’t take a side, couldn’t alienate Saïx, not if he wanted to stay close enough to do damage control.  Stars, why did Roxas have to do this here, he knew Saïx hated her.  Why couldn’t he have just kept this to himself until they were alone.  Was he really stupid enough to think she would be given the benefit of the doubt?

“You agree with me, right?” Roxas asked as Saïx walked away, “Xion wouldn’t betray us.”

“It doesn’t matter what I think,” he bit out, gritting his teeth as he avoided Roxas’s gaze, “All that matters is what the higher-ups decide to do about it.”

“But – “

Axel sighed, “Look, I’ll deal with it.  I’m tired; I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Axel, your orders today are to hunt down Number XIII and neutralize it, by whatever means necessary.”

Axel nearly choked, “You’re ordering me to what!?”

He absently noted Roxas coming closer as Saïx shrugged, “Tell me what choice is left, now that Xion has had contact with that man in the black coat.  Whether it is guilty or innocent has yet to be decided, officially, but it is far too dangerous to leave in the hands of the Imposter, either way.  Better it be destroyed than in the hands of our enemy.”

“What,” Roxas breathed, stopping beside them, wide eyes flickering back and forth.  Saïx ignored him.

“So, I’m to bring her back,” Axel said, ignoring the horror on Roxas’s face, forcing laziness into his voice.

Sais’s nose wrinkled faintly in distaste, “Gagged and tied up, for all I care.  If that proves too troublesome, then you are authorized to adopt a more permanent solution.”

Axel knew which one Saïx would prefer, as he attempted additional incentive by dipping his eyes towards Roxas, who gasped.

“Saïx, no!”

“Get going,” Saïx dismissed, sweeping from the room.

Axel grimaced, finally slumping and turning to face Roxas, “Well, this is pretty icky, huh?”

“You’re not actually gonna follow those orders?”

“Relax,” Axel sighed, “I’ll think of something clever, once I find her.  You just worry about yourself, huh?”

At least he was the one who got the mission.  At least there was space to bring her back.

It went like this: he didn’t dive in to searching immediately.

He couldn’t take long, either, because if Saïx got impatient he would send someone else, and he would find a way to ensure the outcome was death, but he took a moment.  Just a few hours to think, to plan, to figure out how he was getting them out of this.

He’d thought that maybe, with Saïx’s hostility, with the news that Xion was pulling directly from Roxas, that maybe a little time away would do some good.  Not necessarily ideal, not when she’d assumed who knows what from the information she found, but it would give things time to cool off, let him get the situation at home under control before bringing her back in.

But now, with Saïx on the war path?  Anything could happen to her while she was out of his sight, and he’d have no way of knowing.  There weren’t many dangerous members left, but if it got to the point where he sent out Xigbar, with express orders to kill, there’s no way he could –

But, even if he brought her back, how was he going to manage?  He knew Saïx was trying to bait him into taking her out, trying to get him to go along with his plans, like he always did.  Saïx didn’t understand yet that he couldn’t, that he wouldn’t, not when it was the three of them, and they were –

And when he figured it out, he would only get more vicious, he always got worse when his carefully crafted plans started falling apart, he –

No.  Stop.  Think.

Saïx said her guilt wasn’t determined.  That bringing her back was still an option.  That meant, whatever Saïx wanted, the Superior still had reason to keep her alive.  He could use that, if he kept calm, planned carefully.

He breathed in deeply, emptying himself, shaping himself, becoming what was needed.  Remove all other distractions.  His mission was to keep Xion alive – step one, bring her back as fast as possible.

It took him several days to find her.  Dusks would deliver him little notes from Saïx, information on sightings of the Imposter, but it was always days late.  There was no rhyme or reason to the locations, though, nothing that could hint at a plan or purpose.  It seemed the two were simply… wandering.

When he found her, it wasn’t from careful tracking or good info; it was simply luck.  She was on a bench just outside a small town, her escort nowhere to be found.  He could go out, talk to her.  Coax her to talk, convince her to come home.  It’s what Roxas would do.

He wasn’t Roxas.

Xion could run, or resist.  The Imposter could be back at any time.  His mission was to keep Xion alive, and that meant bringing her back quickly.  So, he took the shortest route available.

He sent a chakram spinning forward, the metal flashing in the sunlight.  Xion startled, diving to the side at the last minute, coming to her feet with her Keyblade in hand.  It looked different, he noticed, not the yellow and silver she shared with Roxas and Sora, but a sharper key in gray and pink.  That, it was – he didn’t know what it meant, didn’t know what could cause a change like that, couldn’t trust it.  He swallowed that thought down – no distractions.

“Hello, Xion,” he called, emerging from his cover, summoning his chakram back to hand as the second spun into existence at his other side, “Long time no see.”

He flashed forward, weapon locking around Xion’s blade as each struggled to throw the other aside.

“Axel,” she breathed, eyes wide, and her arms shook just long enough he could wrench to the side, knocking the Keyblade from her hands.  His next strike cut through the fabric of her coat, missing her skin as she lurched backwards.  She scrambled to recover the Key as he pursued, managing to get a grip on it, albeit a backwards one.  She didn’t let that stop her, spinning into a returning blow as if she’d always fought that way, quick low strikes one after the other.

He danced out of reached, and the two of them paused, assessing.

“Axel,” she repeated, wary, tense, “What are you doing here?”

“You know why I’m here,” he scoffed, “Did you think you could run forever?”

He watched fear and nerves and guilt congeal into determination in her eyes, and when he launched into attack once more, she met him blow for blow, no longer off-center from his sudden appearance.  They whirled across the clearing in flashes of flame and steel.  It was a much closer contest than Axel thought it would be.  While he wasn’t looking, Xion had mastered her blade, sliding smoothly between several styles at the drop of a hat.

In fact, when he finally won, it wasn’t due to a difference in combat ability, but the years he had on her that granted him focus.  A shadow approached their fight from the side, barely noticeable in his peripheral vision, and startled badly.

“Xion!”

She jolted, head whipping to the source automatically, “Riku!”

It was only long years of practice that kept Axel from freezing in place at the revelation.  Instead, he took advantage of her momentary distraction to dart in, landing a precise hit against a nerve point.  He caught her as she fell, folding her in close and rolling out of the way of the blow that the Imposter – Riku – struck.

He glared back at him as he summoned a corridor to sweep them far away.

He had retrieved Xion.  The Superior still had reason to want Xion alive.  He could use that.

Saïx would be expecting Axel to report straight to him.  Hes wanted to say it wouldn’t matter if he did, that Saïx wouldn’t take the excuse to kill her when no one was looking, that he wouldn’t take advantage of the open instructions the Superior had handed down to finish off his vendetta.

He couldn’t be sure.

So, he needed her capture – not her erasure – to be public, and he needed to deliver her straight to Xemnas himself.

He landed in the Gray Room.  No Xigbar or Xaldin, but Luxord and Demyx were present, the latter jolting off the couch when he spotted them.  They probably made a sight, he realized, damaged coats and bruised skin, both of them singed.    Assured news of Xion’s capture would spread quickly, he made for the Round room, where Xemnas would surely be holding court.

Adrenaline faded with every step, and his wounds slowly began to make themselves a nuisance in its absence.  She’d really given him a run for his money, battered him all over.  His ankle in particular throbbed with every step, the result of a surprise attack he couldn’t help but reluctantly admire.  She very well might have shattered the joint if he’d been any slower, the vicious thing.

He was so focused on breathing steadily and appearing utterly undamaged, he nearly missed Roxas stepping into his path.

“Axel, you found her!  She –“  Roxas cut off, and Axel shifted his weight, hiding a wince as his ankle throbbed, a shot of pain that jolted up his limbs and agitated all his other bruises.

“Did you do this?” Roxas asked, eyes fixed on Xion’s limp body in her arms.

“She wasn’t exactly amenable to coming home,” Axel answered, glancing down the hallway.  He needed to report in, preferably before Saïx found him and tried to divert his direction. “I did what I had to do.”

“You mean hurt her?” Roxas said, and Axel sighed, though it did nothing but makes his ribs throb again as the blonde stared up at him, “You didn’t have to use force!”

“Didn’t I?”  He tried to shift away from his busted ankle, but that just made Xion’s weight fall heavier on his wounded shoulder.  At this rate he was going fall apart in front of the Superior before he got this done, and that wouldn’t win him any points.

“No, of course not!  We’re supposed to be best friends.”

“This isn’t a matter of friendship,” Axel sighed, glancing further down the hall, testing his weight.  He could make it, if he went now.  Just a bit farther.  “If that’s all, I gotta go.”

He moved forward, carefully shifting Xion closer as he took measured steps towards the Round Room.

After reporting to those meeting in the Round Room, Saïx followed Axel back to Xion’s room, a dark cloud dogging his steps.

“So, the creature has been returned to us,” Saïx said as Axel carefully tucked her into bed, “I suppose I will have to start calculating it back into the Organization’s plans.”

“You’re the one who insisted she couldn’t be left alone,” Axel said.

“You had options,” Saïx sneered, meeting his gaze evenly as he stood back up, “If you could save one of them… why would you choose the puppet?”

“Hey now, I’m just following orders,” Axel dismissed with a sharp-edged smile.

“Hmph.  Maybe I should put it this way: which would you rather suffer the loss of: some make-believe friendship, or a real one?  Xemnas is exasperated from all the ‘fixing’ we’ve had to do.  Everything we’ve worked for is balancing on the edge of a knife; we have to set things right.  There is simply too much on the line, Lea.”

His piece said, Saïx turned to sweep from the room.  Axel bared his teeth, unseen, at his back.  What did Saïx know about what was real?  Days and months of meeting, of sitting and talking and sharing thoughts and laughter – what was more real than that?

Finally – finally – he had a chance to breath.  To process the fact that the Imposter was Riku, that the “impatient friends” Naminé had mentioned must include him, that Riku had had contact with Xion.  What did he say to her, what poison did he drip in her head, and stars forbid he ever get anywhere near Roxas, Roxas who had already called his name once and –

“Axel!”

Axel blinked aware, turning to find Roxas marching towards him, “Oh, hey, Roxas.”

“Where is she?”

“Safe.”  Safe under his watch, safe where Saïx couldn’t order her execution, not with Xemnas still interested.

“Safe,” Roxas repeated, and then his face screwed up, a picture of frustration, “That’s all you have to say?”

“What do you want me to say?” he sighed.

“I want to know what happened!  Why did you attack her like that – why would you think that’s okay?”

“You heard my orders.”

“You said you’d come up with something!” Roxas protested.

“I don’t know what you expected,” Axel bit out, “You’re the one that told Saïx where she was.”

Roxas reeled back, “What, are you trying to say this is my fault?”

“I’m just saying actions have consequences,” he snapped.  Seriously, Roxas knew she was in a precarious situation, he knew how Saïx felt about Xion, why did he think telling him would go well?  “You and Xion would do well to learn that.”

Collecting himself, he sighed, glancing aside, “Anything else?”

“No,” Roxas said, “No, I think we’re done here.”

It went like this:  Axel thought maybe, possibly, he’d been a little… brusque with Roxas.

It wasn’t that he thought he was wrong in what he said, per se.  Things wouldn’t have gotten like this if he had just kept his mouth shut.  It’s just – well, Roxas had always been a bit naïve, and, yeah, okay, bringing Xion back with all those bumps and bruises probably looked bad.  It’s not like he had a choice – he had to, he couldn’t take any risks of someone else coming along to take her out, that was the fast, best route to her survival – but, of course, Roxas didn’t have that context.

So, Roxas was mad at him, that was… understandable.  It was fine – Roxas was pretty easy going, lacked the bite that Xion had, Axel would let him let off some steam and everything would be okay.

He waited till the next day, caught him coming out of a meeting with Xemnas – and what was that about, he’d have to keep an eye on the situation – and approached with a wave.

“Hey – Roxas!”

Roxas met his eyes, and for a moment he saw a twitch of a hand, an instinctual response, before Roxas rocked back, face closing off.  Giving a huff, he turned away without a word.

Maybe this would be harder than Axel thought.  They didn’t have hearts, but this… it stung, just a bit.

The next day, after his mission, he headed towards the clock tower.  He met Xion on the way up, and for a moment they stopped and stared at each other.  He’d captured her, fought her and knocked her out, and she’d hit him back just as hard.  Beyond that, there was the truth of her existence, the reason she ran away, lying between them.

Sighing, he gestured her ahead, meeting her wan smile with a wry one of his own, and followed her up.  They settled on either side of Roxas and watched the sunset in silence.  They were both there, with him and alive.

That was enough for now.

Roxas didn’t get any more welcoming over the following days, turning away instead of meeting his eyes when they ran into each other in the Grey Room, the hallway.  Xion, at least, would meet his greeting, though there was a frantic energy behind her eyes that distracted her.  She took mission after mission, sometimes more than one in a day, frantic, always coming back for more.  Axel took to rushing through his own work to linger in the Grey Room and keep an eye on that interaction.

He wasn’t sure what would drive her to return to Saïx again and again, but the dark look in his once-friend’s eyes promised nothing good would come of it.  In the meantime, he could do nothing but trudge through the monotony of missions – recon after recon after recon, each as dull and boring as the last.

Xion approached him, eventually, though not for herself.  Instead, she was asking about Roxas, about if he’d noticed anything off.  He had to disappoint her, there – Roxas was remaining firmly stand-offish, not looking to drop his grudge any time soon.

Xion seemed unhappy with his answer, “He mentioned that he was upset with you, the other day.  He’s – mad that we fought?”

He hummed, “It’s more about the state I brought you back in.”

“The way… you brought me back?”

“He saw how much damage you took from our fight, thinks a friend should never have done that,” he shrugged, looking away.  He didn’t regret it, he took the best out of a series of horrible options, but from the outside, well.  “He has something of a point.”

She just stared up at him, brow slowly furrowing.  Finally, she spoke slowly, “I’m.  I’m pretty sure I broke your ankle.

“Ha!” The laugh punched out of him, and he snapped a hand up to his face, glancing down the hall to see if they were heard, “Not quite.  That was a good shot, though.”

He chuckled, because it was, as much as it hurt it was really quite impressive, but she winced, folding in on herself.

“Sorry.  About that, and about Roxas.”

“Nah.  This little spat is between him and me, got it memorized?  You can’t take all the blame on yourself.”  He watched as she just curled up even more, and sighed, “Look, if it’s worrying you so bad, I’ll try and talk to him.  Maybe see if I spot what’s bothering you about him, too, okay?  So, just leave it all to me.”

Things were bad, but surely, if he played his cards right, he could make this last, just a little bit longer.

True to his word, after an easy, if boring, mission several days later Axel made his way up to the clock tower.  The setting sun was a familiar sight, soothing him even as nerves thrummed through him.  It didn’t take long for Roxas to show up, turning the corner and stumbling to a stop.

He lifted his hand in a casual wave, attempted a grin that he could feel wavering and, stars, he was supposed to be good at this, unflappable, but –

Roxas turned and left.

That was… fine, it was fine.  If he wanted to hold a grudge, that was his prerogative.  The price of keeping him ignorant, he supposed.  At least this way he wasn’t running around, barreling into his destruction, unlike someone else he could name.

“Axel?”

Speak of the devil.

“Ah, Xion,” he answered, twisting around, “You just missed Roxas.”

“He didn’t stick around?”

“No,” he scoffed, “He left pretty quickly.”

Xion nodded, the shuffled forward – liming, he noticed, favoring one side heavily over the other as she lowered herself down.

“Hey,” he said slowly, “You okay?”

“Today’s mission was hard.  Everything just kind of hurts, and my leg – “

“Do you need a potion?”

She did not, in fact, need a potion, having already used Cure.  If she was still moving like that, though, he had a nasty suspicion about what had happened.  He maneuvered her into letting him take a look at where she was hit – her skin appeared perfectly pristine, as curative magic would do – and when she admitted to breaking her leg, he knew he was right.

“Phantom bruise,” he muttered, prodding at the muscle.

“Huh?”

“Magic can heal nearly anything, if you get to it fast enough, but if it’s bad enough it still hurts like a –“ he cut himself off, quickly rethinking his word choice, “Well.  It’s gonna hurt pretty bad for at least a week.  Not much you can do about that, just – take it easy.”

“That’s not really an option for me,” she said wryly.

“Well, you could try taking only one mission a day,” he said, “You’re making me look like a slacker.”

“You are a slacker,” she jibed.

“Yeah, but you don’t have to make it so obvious.”

She laughed, leaning into him, a little bundle of warmth.  The silence was comfortable, comforting, a breath of fresh air after so many weeks of constant uncertainty.  She was here, she was safe.

“It’s not… It’s not that I didn’t want to come with you,” she started abruptly, “To come home.  I just – couldn’t.”

Ah.  He watched her carefully, weighing his words, “Xion.  What you found out there.  You’re – “

She shot to her feet, cutting him off as she paced back, “It doesn’t matter!  I – I should go.  I’ll see you later!”

“Xion!”

She turned and scurried away, and he sighed.  She couldn’t run from this forever.

He kept an eye on her, over the following days.  Roxas was bitter, but predictable.  Xion’s situation, however, was much more volatile.

He entered the Gray Room one morning to find Saïx sneering down at Xion, the little curl at the corner of his mouth reading vindictive and satisfied, and quickly hurried closer.

“Today, your target is a heartless in Neverland,” Saïx said, “A large heartless has put a halt to all work in the area.  Your mission is to find and defeat it.”

Which, of course, was a problem, given there hadn’t been nearly enough time for Xion’s system to stabilize after using so much curative magic.  He sauntered over, leaning in causally to grin at his once-friend.  From the corner of his eyes, he saw Xion trembling.

“Neverland, huh?” he drawled, “Has she been sent there, before?”

She hadn’t, of course, and he knew that, and Saïx knew that, but she shook her head anyway and he nodded, “Didn’t think so.  You sure about this?  That place is weird, let me tell you – no way anyone’s figuring out how to get around on their first trip.”

He wasn’t sure if Roxas had actually explained about the whole “flying” thing in his reports.  On one hand, it would never occur to him that something like that might be good to redact.  On the other, it sometimes didn’t occur to him that something like that was what you were expected to report on.  Even odds either way, and Axel could work with it regardless.

“What are you suggesting?” Saïx grit out.

“Send me that way,” he said, “I know the place, I’m sure I could get it done.”

“You don’t have the Keyblade.”

“Maybe not, but I also wouldn’t have to dither figuring out how to navigate the place.  The real problem with this one is that it’s blocking progress, right?  I’m sure we could afford to lose this one heart if it gets us up and running faster.”

“Hm.”

“C’mon,” Axel wheedled, leaning in Saïx’s space, “You’ve had me on recon for months, I need to blow off some steam.  Just give me this.”

Saïx scowled, but conceded, “That recon is still needed.  If you take this mission, you’re doing both of them.”

Oh, Saïx was not happy about this.  Still, he’d already come this far – and he couldn’t let Xion take this hit, besides.  Saïx dismissed Xion after that, seething and bitter, and Axel waved her away.  Best she get as far from this situation as possible.

“Is there some reason I should be aware of that number XVI is incapable of completing its duties?” Saïx asked.

Axel sketched his gaze to the side, taking in the muted agitation buried beneath the serene emptiness of his composure.

“I don’t know what you mean,” Axel shrugged, “I just suggested the best way I could see to deal with the problem.”

“I’m not sure you understand what the problem is.”

“Enlighten me, then.”

Saïx worked his jaw, but turned away, “You know how things are – how things will end.  I have the situation under control, as long as you listen.  Just do what I say, and everything will work out for the best.”

He turned, moving to sweep from the room, before pausing, “Remember – I expect both the elimination and the recon mission to be complete by the end of the day.”

It went like this: Saïx’s sour mood continued.

In fact, it seemed to get worse.  Every time he left a meeting with Xemnas he appeared more and more agitated, taking that little bit longer to pull his infamous composure back together.  He grew more vicious with everyone, but Xion in particular gained his ire, and anyone that took up her side, by association.  Axel accumulated quite a bit of that frustration.

It was a delicate balance, stepping in enough to keep her safe, keep her alive, but not so much as to make Saïx completely snap – made all the more complicated by also worrying about Roxas’s continued grudge and Xion’s visibly mounting anxiety.

Both of them were avoiding him – Roxas with purpose, Xion as a result of her constant movement.  When Xion finally approached him, he simultaneously breathed a sigh of relief and gathered himself – this wasn’t a chance he could let go to waste.  Whatever was going on here, it needed to be dealt with now.

She asked about how she was getting stronger, how Roxas was getting weaker.  Asked if he knew what was going on - like she had no idea, like she hadn’t uncovered the secrets of her existence – and that couldn’t continue. 

“Well, what do you think, Xion?”

“I’m not sure,” she answered quietly.

“Not sure, huh,” he muttered, watching her carefully, “Is that because you’re a puppet?”

She flinched, eyes darting down, hunching in – no denials.  She knew, but – she also wasn’t answering.  He pressed further, “You do know that.  You’re a replica, whose original purpose was to copy Roxas’s powers.  So, if you see Roxas’s powers getting weaker, while your powers are getting stronger…  It could be that you’re robbing Roxas of his powers more than you oughta be.”

She didn’t deny it, didn’t ask surprised either, confirming her knowledge – just looked up at him with pleading eyes.

“What can I… then, what should I do?”

Well, if he had the answers, they wouldn’t be in this situation, would they?  Saïx said that one had to go, that the choice of which was obvious, and maybe there was no way to save them, but…

“You’ve got to think for yourself.  Cause I know you’re not just a puppet,” he said, leaning in, catching her eye, “We’re best friends.  You, me, and Roxas that is.  Got it memorized?”

He kept her gaze, carefully, hoping this would sink in above all others – even more than the danger, more than her origins, this was the truth.  She swallowed, eyes shining, and nodded slowly.

“Sure,” she said, giving him a weak but honest smile, before hesitating, “Can I ask you just one other thing?”

“What’s that?”

“Sometimes I see this boy who looks just like Roxas.  Do you… know who he is?”

“Don’t think too much on him,” he answered, “That’s what we’re trying to avoid, right?”

For a second she looked like she was going to argue, but she subsided, giving him a morose nod.

It was a relief, to have cleared the air with Xion.  They still didn’t talk about the day he found her, how he brought her back – but then, that had never been the point of contention, between them.  Somehow, just speaking the truth out loud had settled something in her, and she would drift closer for little pockets of the time, talking to him quietly.  It wasn’t quite ice cream on the clock tower, but it was casual, aimless conversation, a point of connection he hadn’t realized he’d become so dependent on till it was cut off from all sides.

The veritable gauntlet of overnight and high-stakes espionage missions Saïx was placing him on made that outlet irreplaceable.

“Go to this place, got to that place,” he complained as he put off heading out, “One after the other – seriously, I’m running on next to no sleep right now.”

“At least you’re not being sent after boss heartless,” Xion offered with a commiserating grin.

Axel blew out an exasperated breath, slumping back, “True, but the kind of recon I’m running, you never know how long it’s going to take.  Last time I spent three days hiding in a storage closet; and now he’s having me investigate a new world covered in snow – I’m a fire elemental, for crying out loud!”

From the corner of his eye, he spotted Roxas eavesdropping nearby, waited for him to pass by, the sting of being ignored.  Instead, Roxas paused, eyes flickering between him and Xion, over to Saïx across the room.

“Good luck with that,” he muttered.

Axel jolted, glancing over in surprise, but quickly rallied, “Hey, no worries.  I’m tough, I’ll be back before you know it.”

Xion beamed at them.

The mission to the frozen world was, in fact, an absolute pain.  A royal pain, one might say.  And if he suspected that some intel that could have helped him avoid the more troublesome obstacles was kept from him, well, it’s not like the could do anything about that, now could he?

Anyways, he survived, and two painful days later he limped home.

He almost headed for his room.  That’s what he would have done a week ago, but the memory of Roxas’s quiet, grudging well-wishes gave him pause.  It would be a complete waste of energy if Roxas wasn’t there, or worse, if he just turned around again, but.  But.

Those two would be the death of him, he thought, following that little spark of hope and opening a path to the Twilight Town.

He went to pick up an ice cream for himself, first – no reason to let the trip be a total bust, if things didn’t turn out his way.  When he made it to the top, Roxas was already there, turning to face him as he turned the corner.  Axel watched carefully as he took his seat, but his friend gave no sign of hostility.  It wasn’t exactly a warm welcome, either, but hey, he’d take what he could get right now.

“It’s… been a while,” he tried.  Roxas just hummed in response, and he scowled, turning to tear viciously at the package of his treat.  It resisted him, slipping between his fingers until finally ripping open, nearly sending the bar tumbling towards the ground below.

What was he supposed to say, he wondered as he ate.  I’m sorry?  He wasn’t, actually, and it’s not like he could feel guilt from a lie, but he also wasn’t raring to add another one to the pile.  Could you stop being so pissy about my taking the lesser of two evils?  Do you really not get the danger we’re all in?  Are you aware your tiredness is actually your life-force being drained away by your best friend, and it’ll end in your death unless someone kills her first?

Yeah, right.

Thankfully, Roxas solved the problem for him.

“How was your mission?”

He scrambled to clear his throat, answer quickly, “Cold.  Thought I’d freeze before it was all said and done, but hey, my fire was extremely effective against the local heartless preparation, so there’s that, at least.”

Roxas nodded but went quiet.  Well, he couldn’t address everything, but maybe he could get an idea of how bad the damage was, “How about you?  Xion’s said you’ve been wearing yourself out?”

Roxas scowled, and Axel immediately knew he’d mis-stepped.

“I’m fine,” he snapped, “It’s just a little bit of tiredness.  Probably just a bit under the weather, I’m sure I’ll be back to normal in no time.”

“Roxas…”

“I said don’t worry about it!”

Axel flinched back, looking away.  He knew when to cut his losses.

Roxas really was getting weaker.  Now that it had been brought up, now that he couldn’t ignore it any longer, it was obvious to see in his slow movements, the little drifts at the end of every movement.  He put up a decent front, sure, but… well, deception would never be his strong suit.

Xion, on the other hand, was only growing stronger.  He thinks he would have known, even if she hadn’t brought it up.  It was a presence that could be felt, almost like a buzzing shell trailing half a second behind her every movement.  Honestly, it rubbed against him the wrong way, almost felt like someone else was there, if he caught it from the corner of his eye before noticing Xion, but he couldn’t deny it was letting her smash through missions in record time.

This, of course, pissed Saïx off.

Axel found himself having to step in more and more, breaking up brewing conflicts, diverting attention.  Anything to keep the situation from bubbling over.  This only made Saïx more frustrated, though, and it was only a matter of time until he finally snapped.

“Actually,” his friend said, cutting off his clever excuse-of-the-day, “We have a special mission for you, today."

He held out a stack of paper, a mission brief.  Axel took it, warily taking in the steel flashing behind his once-friend’s eyes.  Throwing off his sense of unease, he flicked a glance down to skim over the front page and –

froze.

He stood in stunned silence for several long moments.  This was… Desperately, he pulled in a long, deep breath, then another, each one gathering up the shattered remains of his shattered composure.  When he had enough control not to scream, he met Saïx’s eye once more.

“I thought this mission was shelved for poor risk-reward payoff,” he said, voice flat.

“Perhaps,” Saïx said, “But you obviously have more than enough time if you’re meddling in things that are none of your business.  If you’re so eager to take on other’s work, maybe this will keep you occupied.”

“I see.”

There was a challenge, in Saïx’s gaze.  Something calculating.  There was probably some game at play here.  It could be just a straight up punishment, or maybe Saïx wanted him to push back, to negotiate, to give up.  He couldn’t – he couldn’t think through it, right now.

Refusing to look away, he reached out to tear open a corridor.

“Well, then.  I suppose I’ll see you soon.”

He could see Xion’s face, pale and guilty and terrified, from the corner of his eyes, but he couldn’t give her more than a glance and a pat on the shoulder before marching through the portal.

Fuck this, he thought, stumbling through the halls of the castle five days later.  It was late at night, local time, so there was little chance of anyone spotting him slinking in.  Good thing, too, as if anyone saw his ungracefully, wounded stumbling he’d lose any reputation he may have left.

He was almost to his room, only a hallway away, when movement caught the corner of his eyes from right behind him and he flinched, thought he saw – silver, maybe a hint of brown?  Flashing blue-green-blue eyes glaring up at him – until his eyes focused, and Xion’s startled face stared up at him.

“Xion.” The jolt of adrenaline faded, and he realized how all his muscles had tensed, pain shooting through him.  With a groan, he leaned heavily on the wall.  Xion ducked up under his arm, taking some of the weight from his suddenly shaking knees.

“Axel, what – what happened?”

“Mission went… a little bit wrong,” he answered as she began shuffling him forward, “That mission really should have been kept on the shelf, but…”

“But Saïx was mad at you.  Because you helped me.”

Axel cut a glance to the side, suddenly aware of the guilt and heart-break painting its way across her face.  Oh – well, she wasn’t wrong, exactly, but that expression prickled something awful.

“Saïx is mad at me about a lot of things.  This just happened to be the thing that broke him, that’s all.”

She still looked unsure, and he sighed, “C’mon.  I’ll be fine with some rest; just help me get to my room.”

It went like this: being stuck in his room was so, so boring. 

There was nothing to do but sleep or, when his body would no longer allow that, stare at the ceiling.  He tried to slip into that fuzzy place outside of time, but, frustratingly, it remained just out of reach.

After all these years, he groused, why must you fail me now?

When the door cracked open an indeterminable amount of time later, he immediately snapped his eyes to the side, wary of Saïx coming to pester him for not properly reporting in.  Instead, he found wide blue eyes staring at him through the gap of the door with concern.

“Roxas.”

He hadn’t thought… well, things were still rough between them.  But here Roxas was, slowly walking closer, nothing but warm concern in his eyes.

“Hey, Axel,” he whispered, slinking into the room, “How are you?”

“Oh, you know.  Been better.”  He pushed up, aiming to sit up and greet him, but sharp pain spiked through his ribs before his whole body joined in the protest, static filling his vision for a brief second.  When it cleared, soft hands were supporting his back, helping him finally reach a propped-up reclining position.

Roxas frowned at him, fussing at his pillow, “Xion said you were really hurt.”

“Ah, well,” he sighed, wincing at the memory of a mission gone horribly wrong, “There was a faction that was getting in the way of our work on that world; Saïx sent me to get them out of our way.  I almost managed to make it a clean job, in and out, no fuss, but they caught me on the way out, and… well, the exit got a bit hairy.”

“It was that dangerous and Saïx sent you without backup?  That’s…”

“He knew what he was doing.  He got what he wanted, after all,” Axel sighed.  It certainly got him out of the way, for a while, and out of commission for a few days more.  Although, his likely long-term goals… well, Axel had no plans of stepping aside and letting Saïx’s plans run uncontested.

A hand gripped his wrist, snapping him out of his thoughts, and he turned to see Roxas staring down at him, a little furrow between his brow, “You should be more careful.”

“Huh?”

“Every time Saïx sends you away for a long time, it seems like something bad happens,” Roxas pouted, “We were worried.  You… you’re our best friend.  I told you before, the thought of you or Xion disappearing, it’s…”

Warmth.  It bloomed through him, flooding his veins, stinging his eyes.  A smile spread across his face, soft and small and real, and he could do nothing to stop it.  Reaching out, he dug his hand into those ridiculous spikes, ruffling Roxas’s hair.

“Don’t worry.  I’m not going anywhere any time soon.”

“Good,” Roxas nodded, pulling away, “I’ve got to go take care of my mission, for today.  I’ll… see you soon?”

“Yeah.  See you soon.”

Both Xion and Roxas visited him separately the next day, each individually bringing him a small seashell.  Little trinkets, matching the collections he’d seen in their rooms from their own extended periods of convalescence.  When they left, he held them in bemusement.  What was he supposed to do with these?  It’s not like he had a use for them.

He slipped them into his pocket.

The next day, following a few more potions and a lot of sleep, he was recovered enough to get out and about.  There was an air of hope to the world, one that couldn’t be stopped even by Saïx’s freezing gaze trailing him as he made his escape.

Twilight Town was slipping into a brilliant sunset.  The evening crowds bustled around him as he made his way through the streets, picking up ice cream with a grin for the shop-keeper.

Sure enough, he timed it perfectly, surprising Roxas and Xion at the top of the clock tower.  They passed out the treats, each lapsing into familiar silence as they ate, and suddenly tension that had kept his muscles taut for months released, letting him slump bonelessly back into his seat.

Casual conversation – he’d been looking for that WINNER stick for years, maybe with three people he’d have a better chance – lead to bright laughter and warm smiles.  A perfect moment beneath the sun.

It went like this: as he finished recovering, Roxas only got worse, and with it, Xion’s frantic energy returned.

So, when she returned one day looking strangely serene, he found himself… unnerved.

“Roxas… isn’t looking very good,” she said one day, after Roxas had left early once more, citing a need for sleep.

“No,” he said.

She kept her gaze trained on the horizon; he kept his eyes on her.  He watched as her mouth twisted, expression going wistful, “This has to stop.  Everything I’ve taken… I have to give it back.”

“Well, you’re not wrong, but still,” he sighed, leaning back, “This whole situation, it just… stinks.”

Either let Xion eat away at Roxas’s strength, or let Xion be destroyed.  They weren’t made to co-exist.  Saïx may insist the choice was obvious, but –

Fuck that.

How was a world without Xion any better than a world without Roxas?  One or the other, that was a choice no one was meant to make.  It was so wrong.

Xion hummed, “It’ll be okay.  You said it yourself – nothing lasts forever.  I’m not even supposed to be a person.  I’m just pieces of someone else.”

“You’re Xion,” he denied, and that was the problem, wasn’t it?  She wasn’t just a replica, just an object, “You’re our best friend.”

She smiled at him, and it was warm, but something at the edges of it – prickled.

“You’re sweet, Axel.”

He just stared.  They sat in silence, lingering as the sun finally finished it’s slid from red to purple to deep, deep blue, stars beginning to pepper the sky.

Xion, what are you going to do?

He took in a long breath, somehow managed to let it out as a sigh rather than a shudder, and reached out to ruffle her hair, “I know this seems impossible, but hang in there a little bit longer, alright?”

Just… don’t do anything stupid.

She ducked her head, pausing for a moment, but nodded, “Okay.”

After that, Axel was on high alert.  Every interaction his friends had, every expression on their face and every look sent their way, he went over with a fine-toothed comb.  A good thing, too, or he might have missed it.  Once, he could read Saïx’s mood to the finest detail, but nowadays it all ran together – his distance, his displeasure, his victory.  It was only because he looked so closely that he noticed something… off, about the air of frustration around Saïx.  He couldn’t pinpoint what it was, in the micro-expressions.

Well, he was being weirdly cordial to Roxas, even as he sent the obviously exhausted kid off on a hard mission, but.

But.

“Can’t you let things run their course?” Saïx asked, before turning towards Xion, and Axel –

It stuck with him.  He blazed through his mission, half-assing it, really, before booking it to Halloween Town, praying that the dread in his stomach was just an over-reaction, maybe something that he ate.

It wasn’t, of course.  He didn’t eat anything but ice cream, anyways – what on earth would give him food poisoning?

He landed in Halloween Town in the midst of a massacre, Xion descending on Roxas like a comet as he scrambled backwards.  There was fire in Xion’s eyes and despair on Roxas’s face, and he knew something was wrong, the two of them would never.

But whatever the cause, he needed to step in.

He darted between them, catching a Key on each chakram, arms shuddering under the force of the blows.

After finding the machines that were messing with their minds, after the realization that the Organization set up the whole mission for the two of them to kill each other sank in, after making a quick trip to the Castle that Never Was to pick up potions for a wounded Roxas, they turned to head towards Twilight Town by unspoken agreement.

Before they could make their exit, however, they were interrupted.

“Axel.”

He twisted in place, catching eyes with Saïx.  His once-friend looked serene on the outside, striding smoothly across the room towards them, but he could see the ice in his eyes.

“You two go ahead,” Axel said, not daring to look away, “I’ll catch up with you in a bit.”

There was a slightly scuffling behind him, but the two thankfully decided to follow his instructions, and a second later there was the sound of a corridor opening then closing.  Just in time, too, as Saïx closed in on him.

“Looks like you’ve meddled again.”

“Sorry, I don’t follow.” he drawled.

Saïx strolled to a stop just past him, glaring back over his shoulder, ‘We don’t need both of them – just one will suffice.  It’s time to stop pretending.”

Pretending, pretending, pretending – how long had he been pretending?  Holding onto the ghosts of his past, the memories of what once was, pretending it had any meaning.  Pretending their relationship still had any basis in reality.

Pretending Saïx still cared.

Axel found himself staring his friend down, something dark strangling him from within, wondering if it was all worth it.  He knew, somehow, that he was standing on the precipice of something irrevocable, with no idea how they got here.

“Think about that,” Saïx demanded, looking away and striding off.  Axel watched him go, and he thought about it.

Fuck this, he thought, and –

Fuck that, and, most painfully –

Fuck you.

He turned, summoning a corridor and walking through the dark after Roxas and Xion. 

He’d named them friends, never once believing it could become real.

What would happen if he named them Flight?

When he stepped out from the corridor on the clock tower, two heads whipped around, brilliance of the sunset reflected in their eyes.  They near pulled him into his seat, tugging at his coat and leaning in, questioning him worriedly.  He just laughed, giving in indulgently for just a moment before batting their hands away.

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Don’t worry about me; you know I can deal with him.”

“Usually, yeah,” Roxas agreed, “But they went beyond that.  Today they –“ he cut himself off, even the words too horrifying for him to process, and Axel sobered.

“I know.  But it’s nothing I can’t handle,” he said, dropping a hand on Roxas’s head, meeting Xion’s eyes, “We’ll be alright.”

Roxas ducked his head, brow furrowing, and Xion leaned around him, “Will we?  Today, I almost killed Roxas.  And if they tried once, won’t they do it again?”

She watched him carefully, and Axel just looked away.  She was right, he knew she was right, but –

She nodded, a heart-breaking smile creeping across her face as she folded her hands together, “As long as I exist, Roxas will always be in danger.  Maybe, maybe it would be better if I…”

“No,” Axel snapped, at the same time as Roxas burst out, “Xion, what are you saying?”

“I just,” Xion started, before ducking her head, clamming up.

“Xion,” Roxas sighed, reaching out to take her hand, “When you ran away – when I didn’t know where you were, or if you were okay, I was so scared.  It was horrible.  Whatever Saïx and the others are up to – I can take anything, as long as I know you’re okay.”

“But I’m hurting you,” Xion said, voice breaking.

Roxas tugged her hand closer, tilting his head to meet her eyes, “It would hurt more, if you were gone.”

“He’s right, you know,” Axel said, “Dangerous or not, it doesn’t matter – you’re our best friend.  You’re important, too.”

“So I should just let them use me to kill him?”

“I’m not saying that; but you deserve to be safe, too.  You, or Roxas, that kind of choice is,” he drew in a shaky breath, staring at the two pairs of bright blue eyes staring up at him.  That kind of choice, it wasn’t a choice at all.  “It’s both of you.  Always.  Every time.”

“Even when that’s not an option?”

He reached out, laying his hand on top of where Roxas still had a grip on Xion’s.  There was a pressure building in his chest.  It didn’t feel like the normal emptiness, instead it was filling.

“Even then.  We have to try, right?”

He watched as a sheen grew over her eyes, and she swallowed, but a light came on behind her eyes, one he hadn’t seen in ages, and she nodded, squeezing their hands back.

“We have to try.”

The pressure bloomed, warmth in his breast, spreading down his limbs and pressing outoutout.  He cradled it close, this blossoming thing, folded and tucked it away where his heart should be, protected and precious, the strain of it pressing at his lungs, strong and invigorating and real.

Slowly, slowly, they untangled their hands, turning back to the horizon.

“Say,” Roxas started, “What if… we all just took off?”

“What?” Xion asked, head snapping up in surprise.

“If we ran, I bet we could always be together.”

“But there’s… nowhere to run,” she answered.

Roxas turned away, “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“What’s important isn’t that we hang out with each other every day,” Axel said.

“As long as we keep each other in our thoughts, we’ll never be apart, right?” Xion finished, “We’ve got it memorized, Axel.”

“Good,” he said, eyes burning as he swallowed down a thickness in his throat.

She smiled back at him, “I’ll have these moments memorized for a long time.  Forever.”

“Me, too,” Roxas agreed, “Forever.”

Good.  If he should live forever in anyone’s memory, let it be theirs.

What came next, he really should have seen coming.  Xion wasn’t exactly known for staying still.

She came in with her hood up, two days later, folded in on herself, quiet.  He tried to catch her eye, but other things soon stole his attention.  Being assigned a mission with Xion and Xigbar, of all people, so soon after the last catastrophe made him wary.  His eyes were trained firmlyon Number II – which was probably why he missed it.

“Xion, stop!”

She didn’t look at him, instead keeping her gaze locked onto Xigbar.  Smart, of course, but not exactly helpful when she only leaned further into an attacking stance.

“Of all the faces, why do I look at her and see yours?” Xigbar mused, and Axel shot him a frantic glance, “Why is it that you always have to glare at me like that?”

“Shut up!”

She flashed forward, almost faster than he could track, and Xigbar was out.  It was just the two of them, left in the quiet.

“I’m sorry, Axel.”

“What are you doing?”

“Please, let me go.  I have to, or else – just look.”

She reached up and, after a brief hesitation, pushed her hood down, and he saw –

Sora’s hair and Riku’s eyes and the curve of a cheek that was all Roxas, or maybe a memory of lost childhood, just out of reach, and then it all shifted and it was Riku’s hair and Sora’s mouth and the tilt of a chin he almost remembered and through it all blue eyes staring through him and –

She pulled her hood back up, blocking the sight, and he could breathe again.

Shit.

“Please, Axel,” she said, “You have to take care of Roxas.”

Hissing, he scrubbed a hand over his face and then up to dig into his hair.  Okay, so they’d reached a tipping point.  She absolutely couldn’t stay as she was – being close to Roxas would only make things worse, and he didn’t even want to know what Saïx would do if he saw this.  And, hey, maybe a bit of a break would smooth things out!  Roxas could get his strength back, Xion could do… something, stars, he didn’t know.

“You know what you’re doing?” he asked, and she nodded.  His stomach churned, but there was nothing to do.  He nodded, waving her away, and she turned to go.

“Thank you, Axel.”

She shouldn’t thank him; not for this.  There was no future for them, not really, but did it have to be now?

Just a bit longer, that’s all he asked.

Saïx was pissed, of course.  Xigbar just seemed amused and oddly thrilled, but Axel couldn’t dig into that because he also had to deal with Roxas getting up in arms, asking for answers he didn’t know how to give.  He kept pushing, and pushing, and – something had to give.

“Xion, she,” Axel sighed, trying to figure out how to put it, because how do you sum up the web that had been strung up around them, “She had a point, when she said she was a danger to you.”

“What – no!” Roxas scowled up at him, “You said she was wrong.”

“No, I said it didn’t matter,” he stressed.

“What is the difference?”

“It’s –“ he cut off, controlling his breath, controlling his face.  This used to be so easy.  He tried again, “Xion is like a mirror that reflects you.”

“You’re not making any sense.”

Right, okay – more direct, “Xion is a puppet, created to duplicate your powers.”

Roxas flinched back, eye screaming betrayal, “Are you nuts?  Xion’s a person, not a puppet.”

He shook his head, “She’s a mirror that reflects you.  And when I looked in the mirror, it wasn’t you I saw.”

“Xion is Xion.  You can’t expect her to be me!”

“That’s not what I mean.  It was only a matter of time before someone broke the mirror.”

Memories from Sora, the memories that somehow echoed the Riku replica, her own choices – they were always heading for disaster.  She wasn’t what she was meant to be, and the Organization wasn’t exactly a forgiving place.

“You mean – they have to destroy her?  Answer me!”

“Look,” he punched out, tapping his foot, “If something doesn’t change with her, then you won’t be you anymore.”

“I’ll always be me!  I’m still your best friend – just like Xion is my best friend.”

“That’s not it,” he snapped, “You’re missing the whole point, Roxas.”

Roxas growled, spinning away, “Forget this!”

“Roxas!” he called, but his friend stomped out of the room without looking back.  Sighing, Axel turned, pacing over to lean against the window, glass cool even through the fabric of his coat.

Why couldn’t he just understand?

Xemnas called a meeting the next morning.

“Xion has disappeared yet again,” the Superior announced.

“Do we know where she is headed?” Xaldin asked.

“It – not she – is a replica, merely a puppet,” Xemnas answered – or didn’t answer, as it were.

“A puppet?” Luxord asked, “What does that mean, exactly?”

“A puppet is a puppet, Saïx sneered, and Axel couldn’t stop from rolling his eyes as Xigbar laughed.

“Talking about the replica program, isn’t it obvious?”

More confusion, and Axel largely tuned out as Xemnas repeated what he already knew – she was made to steal the Keyblade’s powers, came from Castle Oblivion, made by Vexen, would he get to the point already? – only straightening as he felt Saïx’s gaze pierce into him.

“Unfortunately, news from Castle Oblivion that replicas could form… attachments came far too late,” he said, “Isn’t that right, Axel?”

Axel tipped his head into his hand, pulling on a bored stare and a lazy curl of his lip in answer.  A muscle at the corner of Saïx’s eye twitched, and he began to sneer, but his no doubt scathing comment was cut off by Xemnas taking center stage once more.

“Whatever the puppet may decide to do, we can be certain it will no longer have an impact on our plans.  Still, it knows our secrets; we need to shorten the leash.  Perhaps even tighten it.”

“What exactly do you –“ Roxas started, and something in his chest seized, because really, he thought now was a good time to cut in, but Xemnas ignored him, instead turning to look directly at Axel.

“Axel.  The onus is on you to capture and bring back Xion, as the escape was on your watch.  I will overlook any nicks or scratches.  Just ensure it still functions on arrival.  Are we clear?”

The Superior stared him down, and he seemed to find what he was looking for, because he nodded.

“Dismissed.”

Meeting adjourned, the other members began to warp out, one by one.  Axel gathered the darkness around himself, pausing as Saïx glared at him once more.

“Axel.  Those orders were absolute.”

“Heh.”

He pulled the darkness open, falling through a corridor.

As if that meant anything, anymore.

He wasn’t quite sure what to do about the whole Xion situation, but he had to at least give the appearance of searching.  Though honestly, if past experience was any hint, he could actually search for her, and he wouldn’t find anything anyways.

Roxas caught up to him before he left, worried and pressing and if he was going to start becoming aware of this situation, couldn’t he jump to full understanding, or just leave this all to Axel like before?

Whatever, Axel could manage.

As expected, he didn’t find any trace of Xion the first day.

He didn’t sleep well, too caught up with the might-bes and could-have-beens, wondering where Xion was, what solutions she was finding, how Roxas would handle all this.  When morning came, he dragged himself to the Gray Room, Roxas stumbling in not long after him, looking even more exhausted than he felt.

“Axel.”

“Hey, Roxas.”

He waited.  Roxas obviously wanted something, but he wasn’t in the mood for guessing.

“Did you find Xion yet?”

“You know it isn’t going to be that easy.”

“I suppose not,” Roxas shifted, mouth screwing up and ah, here it came, “Have you known about Xion this whole time?”

“No, not the whole time.”

“Since when, then?” Roxas insisted, and he sighed, glancing away.

“Uh,” he scratched at his head, “I can’t exactly remember when.”

“Didn’t get it memorized, huh?” Roxas joked, a bitter curl to his words, “Axel – Who am I, really?  I’m special like Xion, I know that.  But the Organization wanted me out of the picture.  Am I right?”

“Something like that.”

“I guess it’s because Xion copied my powers, the Keyblade’s powers, and they didn’t need me anymore,” Roxas paused, staring up at him as something dark flickered behind his eyes, and an answer nausea fluttered in Axel’s stomach, “Maybe you felt the same way.”

He choked on a breath, spinning to face Roxas, “You’re wrong there.  You’ll always be my – my best friend.”

There were other words, truer words, but they wouldn’t mean anything here, would only bring up more questions.  Best friends – that’s what Roxas would understand.

“Best friends are supposed to be honest with each other!” Roxas snarled, “Who am I, Axel?  Xemnas says me and Xion are connected to each other through Sora.  I don’t even know a Sora!  Am I a puppet, like Xion?”

“You’re different from Xion.”

“Then why – “

“Why do you need to know all of a sudden?” he snapped, the curdling in his stomach boiling over, heat flushing through his veins, “You’ve never cared before.”

“I was waiting on you!  I figured it was so important, you would tell me!  But evidently not.” Roxas sneered.

Oh, oh yes, because his ignorance was Axel’s fault.  Because it’s not like Xion couldn’t find answers when she wanted them – not that he wanted that, but –

“Finding the truth doesn’t always work out for the best.”

“What makes you so sure about that?  I have the right to know the truth!  How did I even get here?  Why am I so special?  Where did I learn how to use the Keyblade?  I hardly know who I am!  What is so wrong with wanting some answers!?”

“Roxas….”

“I need to know, Axel.  Please… who am I?”

No, he wanted to say, but there was a darkness in Roxas’s eyes, one he’d seen before, and it’s not like he had any idea what he was doing anymore, and –

There was a little voice, whispering in his ear: he’ll find out; they always do.

Still, still –

“Not right now,” he said, “Just – let me get this situation under control, and I’ll tell you, alright?  You’ve gotta trust me, Roxas.  Just wait a little bit longer.”

He offered his hand, and for a moment he thought he’d take it, but –

“No.  I can’t,” Roxas whispered, turning away, “Somebody knows where I came from.  If I can’t get answers here, I’ll get them somewhere else.”

Axel’s blood ran cold.

He didn’t want to believe it, to admit it, but just in case, instead of heading out to wander the worlds he took a corridor down to the city below, lying in wait.

Just over an hour later, Roxas appeared.

“Your mind’s made up?

Roxas paused, “Why did the Keyblade choose me?  I have to know.”

“You can’t turn on the Organization!” Axel yelled, “You get on their bad side and they’ll destroy you!”

“It’s like I’m going to just roll over and die.”

Axel scoffed, incredulous.  The both of them, did they really think it was that easy?

“What, you think you can stop them?  The others, Saïx, the Superior?”

“I got here, didn’t I?” Roxas shrugged, starting forward again, “I’ll take my chances.  After all, I have to try.”

We have to try, he had said, and Axel wanted to scream.

Not like this.  Not yet.

Another day of looking, another day without finding Xion.

Worse, Saïx was waiting for him when he got back, standing right outside his bedroom.  Axel girded himself for a fight he really didn’t have the energy for, but for a long while Saïx just stared.

“You could have kept one of them, you know.  But you didn’t listen to me, and now you’re going to lose both,” he said finally, “But then, perhaps it’s better this way.”

Axel grit his teeth, staring blankly at a spot on the wall over his shoulder, and Saïx sighed, walking away in silence.  When he walked into his room, the bed that had called his name held no appeal.  Instead, he summoned a corridor, making his way back out into the worlds.

Axel found her in the morning.  It was a bit of an accident, really, that he stumbled onto the trail, but –

Twilight Town, of all the places.

He sent dusks ahead, first, a few of his assassins as well, waiting for them to report back on how many he’d been facing.  Not that he needed it – Xion came running out on her own.

He stepped through a corridor to land in front of her, waving it closed.

“Axel.”

“Xion,” he sighed, “Well, this backfired on us.  What are we gonna do?”

He just wanted to buy them a little time to recover, but he over-estimated the Superior’s patience, and now Roxas was gone.  He had to take her back – he’d get destroyed himself if he didn’t, but –

Xion wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“I’ve decided that I have to go back to where I belong.”

“What?” The question dropped from him dumbly.  She belonged with them, obviously, was his first, idiotic thought, but then the greater picture sunk in.  No.

“Where is this coming from?” he scoffed, trying to press the frantic energy rising in his chest down.  She didn’t answer, and it burned, “You said you’d try – that we’d try and hang on, just a little bit longer.”

“We can’t, you know that,” she said quietly and smiled, grimaced, more like, but her gaze still skimmed the ground, “Why else would you let me go?”

“I thought you were looking for an answer, not trying to – “ he cut off, throat tightening around the words.  She wouldn’t – she couldn’t.

“It’s for the good of everyone.”

“But how do you know that?” he growled, “Everybody thinks they’re right.”

“This is right,” she said, and she still wouldn’t look at him.

“They’re gonna destroy you!”

A flash of light, and she finally met his eyes, Keyblade in hand.

“Please don’t hold back, Axel.  Promise.”

He flinched back, and now he was the one who couldn’t look at her.  He took a long breath, then another, each shaking desperately.

“What’s your problem?!  You both,” he swallowed around the crack in his voice, straightening, letting magic tingle at the tips of his fingers, “You both think you can do whatever you want.  Well, I’m sick of it.”

He hated this.  He hated this, he hated this, he hated this.  It burned, raged through him, an instant flash-fire of searing rage pressing against his ribs.  He swallowed it down into his gut, confined it, pressurized it.

Used it.

His chakrams appeared in a flurry of flames, the metal hot between his fingers.

“Go on, you just keep running.  But I’ll always be there to bring you back!”

The last time he fought Xion, he won, but it had been very, very close.  This time…

There was Sora, in the swing of her blade, hard hitting sweeps and springing over-head strikes.  Then she’d turn with Riku’s steel spine, blade poised at her cheek as she leapt into deadly dives, chasing him across the field until he was cornered.  When he thought he had her locked, she’d twist her grip, hold the Key backwards, twirl around him in a way that itched as familiar in the back of his mind, and –

There was something else, the way she’d shift from softly bending grace into a cruelly striking edge on the turn of the dime, and that was all Xion.

So many different methods, different forms, and she’d switch from one to the next seamlessly – he couldn’t keep up.

He fought on long past when he should have stopped.  His limbs shook, vision blurred, until a final strike had him stumbling, dropping to the ground.  He blinked dazedly, but the spots in his vision refused to clear.  Blood pounded in his ears, sound going strange around him, but he could just make out footsteps coming closer, a shadow falling over him.

He gasped, trying to call out – she couldn’t go, they’d destroy her –

Light flashed off the point of her Key.

“I’m sorry, Axel.”

She turned, summoning a corridor, and he wheezed, trying to claw to his feet, to reach her – he reached out with a shaking hand but –

She stepped through the corridor, and soon darkness found him as well.

He’d lost.

Next >

[archived-kin]

caught in a twin courtship

note from kin: i’m going to be honest i only really wrote this because the title is fun to say, so it isn’t as cohesive as i normally would have wanted to make it

(this is an au where the twins aren’t separated by the unknown god! instead, just their world-hopping powers were stolen, and that’s why they’re journeying to find said god - to get their powers back so that they can go home. i’ve also excluded paimon since i kind of forgot about her while writing this haha)

(this doesn’t follow canon at all since reader and the twins just kind of start wandering about after the dvalin incident rather than heading straight for liyue oops)

fandom: genshin impact

character(s): gn!reader, lumine, aether, diluc, venti, jean

pairing(s): aether/reader/lumine

warning(s): i don’t think so??

genre: fluff with a little bit sprinkling of angst

you first meet the twins in the aftermath of the stormterror battle. it isn’t a glamorous introduction by any means - it’s pretty unflattering, actually - but it definitely makes a powerful first impression.

the group - aether, lumine, venti, diluc, and jean - are on their way back to mondstadt city, making small talk here and there, but mostly just walking in silence.

then they hear a yell in the distance.

jean and lumine both drop into a battle stances, venti leaps to hide behind aether with a very unmanly squeak of fear… but diluc, who arguably should have been the most alerted by this occurrence, just gives a resigned sigh and pauses.

a split second later, a figure comes speeding up to the group. you barrel up to diluc and immediately punch him square in the stomach, yelling “why didn’t you tell me you were going after stormterror?!”

aether and venti both give matching gasps of horror at the blatant disrespect, but diluc only shakes his head and catches your fist as it goes for another blow, this one aimed at his chest, and chastises, “calm down, i left a note.”

“i left a note,” you mimic, an absolutely awful impression that has you sounding more like a mosquito than the darknight hero, “fat lot of use that is when you aren’t even telling me where you’re going!”

diluc evades another jab at his arm and firmly sets his hands on both your shoulders, effectively anchoring you to the ground. you contemplate swinging your feet at his knees and knocking him over, or maybe shocking him with your electro vision, but ultimately decide that you might as well try to preserve what little dignity you have left in front of those three people you’ve never met before

so you stop with a defeated sigh and turn to face said three people to introduce yourself

it turns out that you’re diluc’s cousin and he’s been having to baby-sit you for the last few years after your own parents left on a ‘business trip’ to snezhnaya that they’re still not back from

you’re pretty sure they’re dead, killed by the fatui, and you say as much during your introduction without even the slightest sign of distress, which is a little unsettling

lumine’s first thought is that you’re quite the interesting character, what with the casual way you treat diluc, and how you don’t seem to question whatever situation lead you to meet in the first place

aether’s first thought is holy shit, they’re cute

one twin greets you in return with a lot more enthusiasm than the other, and venti the bard wastes no time in asking whether you have access to good master diluc’s wine storage

(you’d be shocked by the audacity if you weren’t just as bad as him when it came to shamelessness)

strangely enough, the fact that aether likes you so much actually makes lumine more wary of you than she was initially

aether trusts too easily, and from experience, that usually leads to disaster - and your flippancy regarding your parents’ apparent probable deaths rather inclines her to think that you might be a very dangerous person indeed

the three of you don’t see each other for a couple of days after that - you and diluc leave for dawn winery together, while the twins depart with venti to wrap their whole situation up, and jean returns to her duties in mondstadt city

all this time, apparently unbeknownst to even himself, aether keeps finding ways to bring you up in the middle of conversation

you’d only spoken to him for a few minutes and somehow that as enough to get him absolutely fascinated

lumine would be lying if she said she wasn’t still curious about you as well, but it gets annoying after aether somehow manages to mention how ‘mysterious’ your black cloak is in the middle of a conversation about why mitachurls are able to randomly set their axes on fire

luckily for these two, they happen to run into you the very next day!

you’re in the middle of taking out a ruin guard stomping around the thousand winds temple -  a ruin guard that the twins had been meaning to take down themselves, which is why they’re here in the first place

at first they move to help you, only to stop short and watch in awe as you plunge down at the ruin guard from atop one of the enormous pillars, your polearm held steady in your grasp as your entire body seems to spark and glow with a deep purple electro energy

the sharp blade of your polearm goes clean through the top of the ruin guard’s head and shatters its core, and it sinks to the ground with a massive thud that echoes around the temple ruins, massive wooden limbs twitching and jerking as the last of your vision’s energy disperses from it

aether and lumine are basically star-struck

from there you spot them and call them over for a conversation, show them how to take apart a ruin guard’s circuits to get at the good parts, and somehow end up agreeing to journey with them across teyvat in their search for an unknown god who stole their abilities to hop from world to world as well as their apparent true power that allows them to wield all seven elements at once

the details are a little lost on you, but what you’re hearing is that you get to go on a cool adventure with a cool gal and a cool lad, so you’re pretty much all for it

diluc isn’t too happy about you up and leaving without so much as two week’s notice (partially because he has literally no friends apart from you and he’d get lonely without his little cousin bothering him all the time) but you simply tell him to deal with it and go anyway

(you do give him a big hug and promise to visit, you’re not heartless)

from then on you, aether and lumine become a dynamic trio like no other

it’s actually pretty damn spooky how well the three of you end of working together

aether and lumine had long since formed a style of fighting that meant they made up for each other’s weak spots and could attack in perfect sync, but then you come along and somehow manage to make their already pretty flawless formation even better

is it witchcraft? they honestly don’t know

considering you fit so well into their battle strategies, it follows that you’d also slot perfectly into their every day life

lumine is cautious at first, wondering if your presence would disrupt her and her brother’s long since pre-established routines, but you fit in so naturally that it’s as if you were there all long

maybe it it’s this that makes both twins slowly start falling for you - the comfort of being beside you and the familiarity that you bring are things that they struggled to find, being trapped in a world far from their own with no way to get out, and they unknowingly latch onto you like drowning men clutching lifebuoys

aether is the most obvious about his feelings - he starts waking up earlier just because he knows you do, sitting beside you as you stoke a campfire and keep watch for any approaching monsters, making quiet conversation as lumine continues sleeping. he tells you stories about his adventures in other worlds, including an encounter with a rather bigoted individual who is the reason that he keeps his hair so long while lumine’s has been cut short

he even starts taking his hair out of its braid before he goes to sleep so that he can ask you to braid it for him when he wakes up

lumine is a lot more subtle

she finds excuses to stand closer to you when, deliberately brushing her fingers against yours when handing you something. she listens far more attentively to you when you speak than anyone else, and she smiles far more in your presence, hanging onto your every word and gazing at you so intensely that it’s almost unsettling

of course, the twins notice each other’s feelings pretty easily

at first neither acknowledges it - it’d be far too messy for both to accept that they’d both fallen in love with the same person, let alone actually admit this to each other

but it gets to the point where it just isn’t ignorable anymore, and finally the twins decide to talk

it’s about as civil and sensible as they could hope for with the subject at hand, and they eventually decide to talk to you about it

and so, we come to an ultimatum. what will your choice be?

if you reject both, it’ll be hard to continue adventuring with twins who can’t look in your direction. neither resent you, of course, but the atmosphere has become so stifling that they can’t even make eye contact

it’s as if an enormous gap has opened up between the three of you. the twins are avoiding each other as well, unsure of how to handle the fact that they’re both in love with the same person and have now both been rejected by that same person. if anything, they should be becoming closer out of solidarity, but it seems that they can’t stand to be in each other’s presence as much as they can’t stand to be in yours.

the three of you still work together as seamlessly in battle as you did before, but once the final monster has been cut down and your weapons are sheathed, that connection seems to disappear again.

it’s aether who finally breaks the stalemate. he starts trying to start conversations as the three of you sit awkwardly apart from each other around a fire, and while the first few attempts end in stony silence and an awkward cough on his part, eventually you begin replying with some semblance of the humour you used to

from there things only improve - the three of you come to a silent mutual agreement to leave this behind you, and soon you’re all laughing and joking as you used to

lumine and aether both know that they cannot force you to love either of them, and they respect your choice. if anything, they’re the ones in the wrong for springing something like this on you so suddenly, and they start to feel a little guilty that they were essentially pressuring you into making a choice that you were never obligated to make

so they return to treating you as a dear friend, just as before. things are different now, of course, but they can only be grateful that you continue to travel with them and stay by their side; this situation doesn’t make them love you any less, even if you don’t love them in the same way.

if you choose lumine, aether will be understanding. the twins have been each other’s only support for longer than they can remember, and as the older brother, he’s well used to giving things up for his sister.

he’ll still be friendly and amicable, but he won’t seek you out as much as he did before. he starts braiding his hair by himself again, and stays in bed as late as he can every morning so that he doesn’t have to be face to face with you. just because he’s accepted this doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt.

sometimes, when the sky grows dark and you and lumine have long since fallen asleep beside each other, he wonders to himself - why is it that he has to give everything to his sister? he’s given away so much, so why couldn’t the universe let him have this one thing?

but he knows, deep down, that this is nothing to do with the universe - you simply fell in love with someone that wasn’t him, his sister at that, and he’s struggling to come to terms with it.

he wants to hate you, hate lumine, hate the relationship that the two of you have formed, but he just can’t. he loves the both of you in different ways that are just as important as each other, and he can’t stand to lose either of you. he’d rather throw himself off of starsnatch cliff.

so he’ll smile and bear it, even if it’s a battle to keep himself from breaking down every time he sees the two of you lace your hands together, off in your own little word, so near and yet so far from him.

if you choose aether, lumine will become cold. at first, that is. she’s never been as empathetic as her brother, always holding grudges and developing dislike much more easily. it had taken a lot for her to open up to you in the first place, and now that you’ve rejected her, it’s going to take a while for her to return to the same camaderie with you that she had before.

lumine does not begrudge aether for being the one you chose. if anything, she’s glad - aether is always putting her first and himself second, and she’s happy that he has someone like you, who lights his eyes up in a way that she’s never seen before.

but our hearts often betray our mind, after all, and lumine can’t help but scowl and turn away every time she sees her brother wrap his arms around your waist or press a kiss to your cheek. despite her best efforts, all she can think is why? why did you have to choose him?

she can’t bring herself to hate you, though. as much as it feels like her heart is threatening to split down the middle when she sees you smile and is reminded of something that she cannot have, there is an equal joy in the fact that her brother can be with the person that he loves so dearly. if anything, the two of you deserve to be happy together.

lumine would never do anything that could take that away, and so she forces herself to accept it. it takes several days of tentative conversation and barely held back tears, but eventually the two of you seem to return to the way you were before - all friendly jabs and light-hearted banter and little jokes exchanged over crossed blades.

but lumine knows that your friendship can never be quite the same as it was before. she’ll forever be holding you at arm’s length, terrified to let you get too close lest you see how much your presence affects her. she can’t let you know how much she loves you because she will never be the one who links hands with you as you walk down a long, winding path, or the one who holds you close under a darkening sky filled with stars - because that person is aether, and she would sooner die before she takes her brother’s happiness away.

if you refuse to choose, the twins will be at a loss at what to do. they hadn’t considered this scenario - that you had somehow come to love both of them.

the confusion becomes joy soon enough, though. they realise what this means - they both love you, and you love both of them! isn’t this perfect?

neither are particularly thrilled at the concept of ‘sharing’ you with the other, so to speak, but in the end they both equally want each other to be happy as they want you to be, so the logical conclusion is that they both become your partners.

they’re not too sure how this should work, nor what sort of label to put on it, but they come to you tentatively with the idea anyway

to their joyous surprise, you agree!

and from then marks the point of no return…

aether is definitely the clingier of the two. once he realises that he’s allowed to show affection and be close to you for no particular reason, he won’t stop - it’s as if he absolutely has to be holding your hand or be standing or sitting  as close to you as physically possible. he’s always buying you souvenirs at every place you stop by, scaling trees to pick apples for you when you mention a craving for fruit, presenting you little treasures that he’s found with all the pride of a golden retriever.

lumine is a more subdued kind of partner, preferring to demonstrate her feelings with little things like making your favourite food for dinner or bringing you sprigs of flowers that she’s secretly been collecting in order to present you with them. of course, that doesn’t mean she isn’t physically affectionate at all - she presses perhaps even closer to you than aether when you sleep beside her, and somehow her hand finds yours at every opportunity she has.

the twins clash every now and then, as siblings often do, except that you’re usually caught in the middle. their arguments are little more than playful squabbles, though - things like play-fighting over who gets to hug you first after a well-fought battle, or who gets to hold your hand on the way to the next village (you have to step in and remind them that you do, in fact, have two hands)

in conclusion: why choose one when you can have both and prevent the unchosen from having endless amounts of angst?

[tokoyamisstuff]

Scandal Ch. 3 - Loki x Reader

Summary: You find shelter in the freezing lands of Jotunheim, and surprisingly some new allies. But Loki is already coming after you...

Warnings: Angst

Words: ~1500

A/N: Sorry, this one is a little short.

I Story Masterlist I General Masterlist I

Taglist:  @hi-there-x @haloangel391 @misssilencewritewell @babayaga67 @accioremuslupinn @mochimommy2002 @just-someone-who-likes-to-write @damalseer @bethanystan @loser-alert @star017 @nina1800​ @queenariesofnarnia @n1fangirlsblog​

Only the anchestors keeping watch over you would know just how long you had been resting until your body was eventually able to move again.

As you looked around, you found several pairs of glowing red eyes observing every one of your moves, clashing with the otherwise darkness around you.

You bolted in an upright position, chest waving heavily as your breath was forming a cold mist. Much to your surprise, you were covered in warm furs.

“Worry not” one of them spoke, their body almost inseparable from the icy cave you apparently resided in. “We are a warrior tribe, not warmongers. What do we gain from killing a weak Asgardian noblewoman and their child?”

“Where is he?!” you choked on your own sob, only able to calm down when yet another giant handed the small bundle into your arms. 

They seemed to have cared for him while you were unable to, having fed and cleaned the small boy who was still impossible to distinguish from those powerful giants.

“What is his name?” A female of them seeked to know.

You stopped in your tracks at her question. Everything happened so fast, there was no time to think about it until now.

“His...his name is...L-Liam*. Liam Lokison.” The unintended alliteration made you smile. Yes, this was a formidable name for such a little fighter.

“Loki, you say?” A row, deep voice drang to your ears, huffing at hearing the name of your husband.

It is him again - Laufey.

Initially, you wanted to express your gratitude for his benevolent hospitality, but concluded it would be better to not interrupt.

“Loki, you say?” he repeated the name, tone laced with venom pumping through his heart. “That pathetic excuse of a Jotunn?”

What in hel did he just say?!

“No wonder that crossbreed of yours is so pathetically tiny.” Laufey would now eye his grandson with great fascination, even though adverse. “A disgrace, just like his father.”

“Wha- what in the realms are you...talking about?”

You took in a sharp breath,pulling the child deeper into your arms and away from his wary eyes.

The king could only laugh at your attempts, finding this farce absolutely amusing.

“Hilarious”, he scoffed, “I take from your reaction that Odin is still the old, pathological liar.”

The Allfather had expected you to die in this environment before you’d ever find out the truth, and even if not - Odin thought Laufey to be wildly ashamed of his son, and he would never admit that this freak was his child.

And that was where he was wrong.

“He still didn’t tell any of you?” The Jötunn thought back to that day of indescribable loss. First and foremost the war with Asgard and them taking away his power, together with the Cascet of Ancient Winters - and then...

“The man you call the God of Mischief was born on Jotunheim, as Laufeyson” he declared, and the following words made your heart clench dreadfully. “For whyever I deserved such misfortune, my firstborn came into this world as a failure.”

“Our world is harsh and unforgiving” Laufey continued and apparently, none of the folk seemed surprised. “It is an act of mercy to erase the weakest of our kind, since they wouldn’t survive either way.”

“Lies” you hissed - but the proof was right there, in your arms. “You are lying!”

However, deep inside, you already knew that his words were true.

Why?

Not minding the surrounding giants, you began crying from all the weight on your heart - mourning over the fate of your lover.

From his very first day, Loki Laufeyson was doomed. His only birthright was failure, exclusion and resentment, with death’s grip constantly at his throat.

“Then-” Connecting the dots, fear overcame your system. “Why did you help me?”

“Too much blood of Asgardians and Jotunns had been shed.”

Now that you thought of it, they had saved you - cared for Liam, even. Neither had they left you to die, nor tried to harm you or the child in any way.

Odin was really the greatest liar in all of history - for there were no monsters in Jotunnheim. Only a different race of people.

“I have stained my own hands in countless battles against your kind. But we are in dire need of peace, Y/N of Asgard. And your child could be the key.”

Anger began boiling inside of you, thoughts still revolving around how Loki had been lied to for all those years - and for what? Diplomacy? Using him like a tool, to control the Jötunn?

“Loki is Asgardian just as much as you are.” Somehow, the king almost sounded pained at the revelation. “He is unaware of his heritage, taught to despise us from childhood on. There is no way he would connect our two cultures with how much hatred he bears in his heart.”

At first, you felt close to passing out once again - the emotional exhaustion being way worse than what your body could take.

Those past two days were just too much for you: Liam’s birth, his genes, being cast out by your own people - and now, knowing that Loki had been lied to and used, even might be in danger at the hands of his own father?!

“So, you want me to...raise him here?” The thought alone made your insides churn, thinking back to your homeland. “I think I have to decline that generous offer.”

“No, not like that.” Laufey slowly approached both of you, wary to not touch your skin in any way. He signalized the want to touch his grandson, and you allowed it.

Of course, in a primal tribe like that, showing weakness was unforgiveable - especially if you were the king.

Yet you couldn’t really describe why, but somehow you knew that Laufey wasn’t as heartless as it appeared to be. Maybe, back then, he really thought his decision to be best - but now?

Everything you could decipher in his orbs as he touched Loki’s child was remorse, yearning and guilt. The loss of his firstborn was still present in his heart, aware that even though alive, they had grown apart from each other beyond repair.

“You need sunlight and warmth to survive.” Homesickness could also kill you, you knew that much. “We only ask of you for visits during his upbringing, so he can learn our ways and traditions. See both sides of the coin.”

A bridge between worlds, huh?

On the one hand, it was a huge responsibility you would burden on your child - yet you knew that at least learning about his heritage was his birthright.

Never you would allow yourself to dwell on comfortable lies like Odin, just because you didn’t want to be condemned for the past!

You would save Loki, as well as ensure this wonderful child’s future!

“Laufey, my king and inlaw, so it shall be. This child is now part of your tribe, as much as it is Asgardian.”

_____

[Several weeks later]

“To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Laufey looked down on the Asgardian prince, standing in front of the gates of the Jotunn village.

“I demand on seeing my wife, you dull creatures!” Loki materialized a dagger, threatening to throw it right into the Jötunn’s eye. “Whatever you’ve done to her, I will repay a thousand times!”

Unimpressed, Laufey spoke “I see Odin has taught you his manners. Violent, hotheaded and selfish. No wonder she did not stay with you.”

“I ask you this one last time: Where. Is. Y/N?!”

Without any second thought, the God of Mischief had left in secret, facing the giants all alone without help of his brother or soldiers.

Because your husband was devastated beyond relief.

Without you at his side, the half-god had completely lost his way. All this time since he thought you dead, nothing could save Loki from his own mind.

For weeks, he wouldn’t leave his chambers, sitting in the dark for hour after hour without nourishing his body in the slightest.

He was haunted by how your belongings reminded him of those blissful days of your marriage. Your scent was still present on those now empty bedsheets, fogging his mind and keeping him from much-needed sleep.

The only matter he busied himself with aside from screaming and crying until his throat went sore, were the thoughts of what could be:

Knowing himself responsible for your imminent demise was eating him alive - even if that child wasn’t his, if only he didn’t rush things and would’ve let some time pass, to become clear-headed again as he was now.

Would Loki be able to forgive you and live on, overcome this hardships like so many before?

Most certainly! Because he needed you at his side, more than anything else.

Loki Odinson couldn’t live without the light of his life.

And if there was even the slightest chance of you still being alive, he would claim what was his and start anew.

“Loki, your eyes are wide open, and yet you don’t seem to see the full picture.”

When Laufey refused to descend to the entrance, Loki would immediately teleport himself towards the giant, blade aiming at his throat. “You will answer to your crimes, monster!”

The king was able to repel the attack by grabbing the god’s wrist - yet instead of the incoming pain Loki was expecting, merely his clothing froze into crumbles...

...and his limb turned in a shade of dark blue.

“You’ve grown strong, my son.”

_______

*Liam is a irish name, meaning “strong-willed warrior” or “protector”.

[edenmemes]

the witcher 3: wild hunt starters

including quotes from the dlcs hearts of stone & blood and wine

❝  you were always an unruly child. i adored that about you.  ❞ ❝  mmm. yes. of course. the excuse you resort to when you’d rather not talk about something.  ❞ ❝  how many have you killed? how many more might you still?  ❞ ❝  you know who i am. and why i’m here.  ❞ ❝  you're a madman and always have been. a cruel, cold-blooded killer.  ❞ ❝  a man should frame his wishes carefully. it forestalls disappointment.  ❞ ❝  no argument. you knew what you were signing up for.  ❞ ❝  maybe once, in a different time...i’d have helped.  ❞ ❝  don’t train alone, it only embeds your errors.  ❞ ❝  wanna get drunk off my ass. and it’s gotta be on cheap wine.  ❞ ❝  you’re a heartless bastard.  ❞ ❝  try to trick me anyway, anyhow, you won’t go anywhere, you know that. ‘cause i’ll take your head off right where it meets your neck.  ❞ ❝  sorry. i don’t want to talk about it. not now, at least.  ❞ ❝  we are more like a family.   we support each other and help each other survive tough moments.  ❞ ❝  so how’s it feel to be the village witch?  ❞ ❝  realize, please, that you were made for great things.  ❞ ❝  folks say a curse has fallen on that place, a dark power brought down by the bestiality of the murders it beheld.  ❞ ❝  so, now you’ve threatened me and all...are you in or are you not?  ❞ ❝  i know it must sound foolish, but in the dream - well, it was all too real...  ❞ ❝  we may not survive this. in fact, our chances are slim.  ❞ ❝  it’s always been about you. only you.  ❞ ❝  i remember finding your sense of humor both groan-worthy...and somehow endearing.  ❞ ❝  kings die, realms fall, but magic endures.  ❞ ❝  i detest banquets. vacuous conversation, food portions fit for a mouse, drinks that taste like piss...  ❞ ❝  despite what you’ve heard, i don’t lunge at every monster i see, sword in hand.  ❞ ❝  each day’s more dangerous than the last.  ❞ ❝  it’s folks like you that restore my faith in humankind.  ❞ ❝  my power lies in possessing knowledge, not sharing it.  ❞ ❝  the rotten smell brings back childhood memories.  ❞ ❝  awfully noble of you, showing so much concern for the needy.  ❞ ❝  no need to thank me. always glad to save your ass. you’re welcome.  ❞ ❝  i may be inhumanely beautiful, but i don’t have super human senses.  ❞ ❝  anyone can be made to talk, even a corpse. one must simply know how.  ❞ ❝  we’ve done the hardest part. only got the pleasant bits now.  ❞ ❝  there are few causes worth saving. even fewer men.  ❞ ❝  don’t treat me like a child.  ❞ ❝  there’s strange men lurking outside the house. watching me.  ❞ ❝  you must be careful what you wish for lest your wish be granted.    for there are consequences.  ❞ ❝  shall i be free of the suffering? the sadness?  ❞ ❝  i wish to gaze into those eyes, eyes the devil would be proud to have.  ❞ ❝  you were born with a great gift. and only you can decide how to use it.  ❞ ❝  any other words of wisdom? or can we go?  ❞ ❝  what i need is an ally. and something tells me i shall find none better than you.  ❞ ❝  i can see no row can occur here without your participation.  ❞ ❝  i and what concerns me have not been a concern of yours for some time now.  ❞ ❝  if you’d not arrived in time, things might have ended considerably worse.  ❞ ❝  if they can bleed, they can die.  ❞ ❝  a man must display some madness from time to time --- it helps him feel alive.  ❞ ❝  i was deeply troubled. you’ve no idea.  ❞ ❝  done that so many times, but...it felt like our first kiss to me.  ❞ ❝  don’t need to play tough on me.  ❞ ❝  i've lost too many mates already. i won’t risk it, i can't.  ❞ ❝  there’s just not enough of us. it’ll be a hard fight.  ❞ ❝  in lonely woods, screams carry long.  ❞ ❝  things used to be simpler.    monsters were bad, humans good.   now, everything’s all confused.  ❞ ❝  as for your missteps --- i don't rightly see why i shouldn't laugh if they're amusing..  ❞ ❝  i’ve no gold to offer you in reward...but i shall be ever so grateful.  ❞ ❝  if you’re scared, turn back. i’m gonna go on.  ❞ ❝  if anything happens, i’ll defend you.  ❞ ❝  once you say "i love you," a kiss has to taste differently.  ❞ ❝  maybe we should sit? you look a bit dazed...  ❞ ❝  drink it off, sleep it off, whatever it takes...just get yourself together and think things        through.  ❞ ❝  i shall join later, if it’s no trouble. i don’t yet feel strong enough to venture out.  ❞ ❝  awake at last. you writhed like a squirrel caught in a snare.  ❞ ❝  again you plan without even asking what i think!  ❞ ❝  come to see how i’m feelin'? thanks, not bad.  ❞ ❝  i remember that day quite well...there was a light drizzle, yet the cold tore right through you.  ❞ ❝  you gotta keep your eyes peeled wide open. someone’s taken an interest in your work.  ❞ ❝  oof...for a minute, i actually thought we were doomed.  ❞ ❝  you shouldn’t worry yourself --- it tarnishes your beauty.  ❞ ❝  i’d even embrace you...were you not covered in blood.  ❞ ❝  guess i could’ve been someone worse...just a shame i had no choice.  ❞ ❝  facts interest me. not fairytales.  ❞ ❝  hm, odd smell. blend of alcohol, blood and monster stench.  ❞ ❝  i’m old and i am wealthy. i may say what i please.  ❞ ❝  now, be so kind and leave me to my thoughts.  ❞ ❝  in your shoes i’d pack it up and go hide somewhere far away.  ❞ ❝  forgive me, but that's the blatherin' of someone who clearly can't snap out of it after a tragic loss.  ❞ ❝  that all you gotta say? i saved your life.  ❞ ❝  i swear on all that is holy: we shall be together forever.  ❞ ❝  think of me as part of the decor.  ❞ ❝  anyone who’s bold enough to fight is already a hero.  ❞ ❝  if this is a trap of some sort...  ❞ ❝  you can count on me, you know? always.  ❞ ❝  you don’t know how much it means...to have someone you can rely on in this fucking city.  ❞ ❝  i know you. you have no heart.  ❞ ❝  no room for friendship in this business.  ❞ ❝  evil is evil. lesser, greater, middling, makes no difference. the degree is arbitrary, the definitions blurred.  ❞ ❝  hands off, or i'll cut them off.  ❞ ❝  i’ll need to clear my head first. after those deranged dreams, i feel it’s full of cobwebs.  ❞ ❝  on your way? or will you stay longer? it’s far safer with you around...  ❞ ❝  really sad story, but something’s not right. got a feeling you’re not telling me everything.  ❞ ❝  gotta admit, there’s something about you. you’re...different.  ❞ ❝  with each arrow i shoot, i think of my dad. he’d be proud, i think.  ❞ ❝  i merely know when to indulge my pride, and when to swallow it.  ❞ ❝  you were born to greatness.  ❞ ❝  these’re dark, grim times. no room for knights pure of heart or happily-ever-afters.  ❞ ❝  a life without liquor’s like loving without licking.  ❞ ❝  my certainty i walk the right path grows strong as iron, firm as steel.  ❞ ❝  few make me feel awkward, but in your presence, i feel anxiety, discomfort.  ❞ ❝  some men have got good reason to fear their own shadows.  ❞ ❝  some men cannot admit defeat. some keep fighting from beyond the grave.  ❞ ❝  stare into their eyes, feast on their terror. then go in for the kill.  ❞ ❝  forget not that you are a person right and honorable, devoted to doing good.  ❞ ❝  ash shall fertilize the soil. by spring, the valley shall bloom once more.  ❞ ❝  there’s lots of wraiths here. i hear them whispering every night.  ❞ ❝  no one has the courage to face this threat! yet we must kill them, or sooner or later we will all die.  ❞ ❝  you are a step away from losing your head. speak the truth and you might yet keep it.  ❞ ❝  you carry within you the weight of a terrible tragedy. you are a good person, but lost. which is why you come across as grim.  ❞ ❝  if i understand you correctly, you would rather help a monster than kill it?  ❞ ❝  discouraged after a mere eight attempts?  ❞ ❝  easier to pat someone on the back and hope things will work out than it is to face the truth.  ❞ ❝  know that they can’t teach an old dog new tricks?  ❞ ❝  my, you’ve grown beautiful.  ❞ ❝  my swords a promise --- if i reach for it, heads will roll.  ❞ ❝  one condition: no one dies. that clear?  ❞ ❝  patience happens to be my weakness. so dispense with the dramatic pauses and talk.  ❞ ❝  you proved today you can take care of yourself.  ❞ ❝  you under the delusion you’ll complete your tasks, live happily ever after?  ❞ ❝  i will not sit and twiddle my thumbs. i'm sick of waiting, sick of hiding!  ❞ ❝  glad you know who i am. haven’t introduced yourself, though.  ❞ ❝  i’ve seen a great deal --- cruelty, cynicism, greed.  ❞ ❝  you tempt fate, because at heart you are unhappy.  ❞ ❝  we had our chance, but...let it go.  ❞ ❝  come now, you didn’t expect it to be that easy, did you?  ❞ ❝  promise me one thing --- you’ll stop risking your life for others.  ❞ ❝  instead of dwelling on the future, i’d rather live in the moment.  ❞ ❝  i adore love stories. especially the ones that end happily ever after.  ❞ ❝  we are drops of rain that together make a ferocious storm.  ❞ ❝  the path to freedom is paved in blood, not ink.  ❞ ❝  we’ll get our happy ending. one day.  ❞ ❝  i’ll never forget what you did for me...and what we had together.  ❞ ❝  don’t meddle in other people’s lives.  ❞ ❝  i don’t get attached to places. just people.  ❞ ❝  it’s dangerous, there are risks involved. understand that, don’t you?  ❞ ❝  and here i hoped someone would finally take pity on me.  ❞ ❝  seen a lot of dead in my time, but that must’ve been hard.  ❞ ❝  air is strange...like dropping into a deep cellar on a hot day...  ❞ ❝  wouldn’t carry a sword if i didn’t know how to use it.  ❞ ❝  take it you didn't summon me to reminisce about the good old days, so...  ❞ ❝  i was attacked --- had to defend myself.  ❞ ❝  guards have never stopped me, you know that.  ❞ ❝  treating the ill and wounded...it’s my calling.  ❞ ❝  you think it’s enchanted?  ❞ ❝  there are times when a woman should simply not explain her decision.  ❞ ❝  won’t find too many comforts, but try to feel at home.  ❞ ❝  i was looking for you...sometimes i thought you were just a step away. other times, i felt like i was going around in circles.  ❞ ❝  i’ll remember you. always with a smile.  ❞ ❝  i’d rather you not make anymore trouble --- for yourself, or us both.  ❞ ❝  got the stench of corpes on you.  ❞ ❝  you stood to gain --- that is why you saved me.  ❞ ❝  sages invariably have hidden agendas. altruism is simply not part of their constitution.  ❞ ❝  the gods have abandoned us. the mighty of this earth care not for our fate.  ❞ ❝  is that admiration i hear in your voice?  ❞ ❝  i started off heading in the opposite direction, but then turned around.  ❞ ❝  i’m fed up. i won’t have others deciding for me behind my back.  ❞ ❝  where’d you get this idea? what’s gotten into you?  ❞ ❝  i don't expect you to commit now. think it over, what you've heard, what you feel.  ❞ ❝  head torn clear off...takes incredible strength.  ❞ ❝  desperate fathers have been known to do a lot to find their daughters.  ❞ ❝  you cannot kill me. you know this...  ❞ ❝  "i give you my heart”? what kind of spell is that?  ❞ ❝  i’d go anywhere with you.  ❞ ❝  why? because i am a woman? in a frock, rather than plate? i can take care of myself, i assure you.  ❞ ❝  everything we discussed here, hope you’ll keep it to yourself. counting on it, in fact.  ❞ ❝  trusted you once. won’t make that mistake again.  ❞ ❝  shut up. i’ve heard enough of your bullshit. draw your weapon, let’s get this over with.  ❞ ❝  exaggerating for effect, right?  ❞ ❝  well, well...when cornered, you can bite.  ❞ ❝  you cannot win...even if you kill me.  ❞ ❝  you know i’m good at accomplishing the impossible.  ❞ ❝  it’s nothing, really. you’d have done the same for me.  ❞ ❝  you are not ready. you do not control your powers.  ❞ ❝  you’re a tool in their hands, even if you don’t see it.  ❞ ❝  i’d do anything for you, i would. you know that well.  ❞ ❝  this is a land where the fantastic is normal, and the impossible occurs daily...  ❞ ❝  know when a legend becomes a prophecy? when it gain believers.  ❞ ❝  i thought you’d become a stranger to me. that i’d look at you and not feel a thing. but it’s not like that at all. nothing’s changed.  ❞ ❝  to be honest, i just wanted to go on a walk with you.  ❞ ❝  what i really want is to be with you, to...to be together and...  ❞ ❝  this is not the kind of offer one refuses.  ❞ ❝  despair devours you like maggots devour a corpse.  ❞ ❝  before long every soul will kneel before you.  ❞ ❝  i run into dilemmas all the time. situations where it's hard to judge, hard to know what's right, make a decision. this is not one of them. you disgust me. and deserve to die.  ❞ ❝  you know me. i’m rare to praise, but when i do, it’s sincere.  ❞ ❝  i'm not a thug for hire.  ❞ ❝  i like being on adventures, sleeping under the stars, waking up with dew on my face.  ❞ ❝  the dream's within reach now. i’m not about to let it go.  ❞ ❝  unlike you, killing gives me no pleasure.  ❞ ❝  can't speak for the world you inhabit, but in mine, nothing is ever black and white.  ❞ ❝  you cannot possibly imagine how much i detest this place.  ❞ ❝  stones you’ve got. but i didn’t think you’d have the stomach for a massacre.  ❞ ❝  the dead man --- looked like a monster attacked him recently.  ❞ ❝  finish all your business before you die. bid loved ones farewell. write your will. apologize to those you’ve wronged. otherwise, you’ll never truly leave this world.  ❞ ❝  i've had nothing but nightmares lately. pretty horrible.  ❞ ❝  i was wandering through the forest, breathing deep the air, and then i heard a strange sound, unsettling.  ❞ ❝  had a few nice dreams. for example, in one we sat around a fire, drinking good wine, and all around people danced and laughed.  ❞ ❝  they’re all dead! mountains of corpses. yet here i stand alone. all alone.  ❞ ❝  this isn’t a game. men have died.  ❞ ❝  if you wanna listen, listen, if not --- i'd rather you spared me your wit and throw me out now.  ❞ ❝  you fed me, cared for me, had my wounds looked after. we're even now.  ❞ ❝  you’ll return, you shall. our fates are bound.  ❞ ❝  i’ve nothing left. not a fucking thing.  ❞ ❝  i don’t question your abilities. i simply don’t trust you.  ❞ ❝  what foolish things men sometimes do.  ❞ ❝  dare harm me, and against you will rise all the powers of nature.  ❞ ❝  did you destroy the evil powers? have you brought peace to my domain?  ❞ ❝  well, perhaps i shall tell you about it one day. one day, but not today..  ❞ ❝  times like these, you never know what tomorrow will bring.  ❞ ❝  you worry too much. what will be, will be.  ❞ ❝  have you gone completely mad? we must leave here at once!  ❞ ❝  time eats away at memories, distorts them. sometimes we only remember the good... sometimes only the bad.  ❞ ❝  you don’t need magic to strip men of their humanity. i’ve seen plenty of examples.  ❞ ❝  if i’m to choose between one evil and another, i’d rather not choose at all.  ❞ ❝  see what i’ve got on my back? wolves fear it. kings do, too.  ❞ ❝  i missed those awkward compliments of yours.  ❞ ❝  sometimes i think it’s all too lovely to be true…that something’s bound to happen, another war or some other horror.  ❞ ❝  took you a while. did you run into trouble?  ❞ ❝  i just travel a lot. and i don't always happen upon such good and civil company.  ❞ ❝  what can you know about saving the world, silly?  ❞ ❝  done my share of fighting. wouldn't carry a sword if i didn't know to use it.  ❞ ❝  all right, perhaps i wasn’t completely honest.  ❞ ❝  ever thought this day would come? me and you...peace and quiet...bees buzzing, birds chirping.  ❞ ❝  i detect a shadow of impatience in your face.  ❞ ❝  took me a long time to find you. wasn't an easy road to travel.  ❞ ❝  wipe that frown off your face, or i might think you don’t like me anymore.  ❞ ❝  always believed attack was the best defense.  ❞ ❝  once it’s all over, if we survive ... i wish to leave, go far away.   and i’d like you to come with me.  ❞ ❝  naturally, you suspect me of the worst. i don’t deserve that.  ❞ ❝  we can fight another time, in another place, where the walls have no ears.  ❞ ❝  once i was free...i shall be free once more.  ❞ ❝  believe me...a tavern, mulled wine, our boots drying by the fire --- i’d like nothing better.  ❞ ❝  prove it. kiss me.  ❞ ❝  the prophecies do not lie...you cannot survive this struggle.  ❞ ❝  i know you better than you think.  ❞ ❝  you know me. nothing i like more than breaking rules.  ❞ ❝  what’s happened? it’s so quiet, all of a sudden.  ❞ ❝  thank you, for coming with me.  ❞ ❝  i cannot do everything for you. use your head.  ❞ ❝  i'm angry and tired. had to kill a lot of people along the way.  ❞ ❝  we’ve come a long way, and i’d be damned if we’ve come to fail.  ❞ ❝  i sense your pain. i see your fear.  ❞ ❝  how’s this for an answer: kiss my ass.  ❞ ❝  how many have you already killed? how many more might you still?  ❞ ❝  i'm quite alive and extraordinarily well. better than i've ever been in this rotten life of mine.  ❞ ❝  i like it when you smile. come here. everything will be all right.  ❞ ❝  ugh. don’t fall in love with me.  ❞ ❝  i don’t like you. in fact, i feel like slapping you.  ❞ ❝  i'm too old to play the blushing bride...unless you ask nicely.  ❞ ❝  that bit of my life --- forgotten it already.  ❞ ❝  the world doesn’t need a hero. it needs a professional.  ❞ ❝  next time you wonder why i’m so bitter...well, there's your answer.  ❞ ❝  nothing wrong with having a drink in good company.  ❞ ❝  i want you behind those rocks. and keep your mouth shut.  ❞ ❝  nice of you to worry...but i've made my decision, and i won't change it.  ❞ ❝  this is my story, not yours. you must let me finish telling it.  ❞ ❝  after all that toil, i believe we deserve a bit of a rest.  ❞ ❝  i was afraid you were dead.  ❞ ❝  we’ve all some stain on our conscience.  ❞ ❝  leaving the castle walls means certain death.  ❞ ❝  right good jest. had us a laugh. now fuck off.  ❞ ❝  i’ve heard about you. you bring trouble, or thus far have, always.  ❞ ❝  ah, you’ve struck a raw nerve.    memories of a time long past to which i’d rather not return now.  ❞ ❝  we meet again. and it seems you need my help. again.  ❞ ❝  got a relative i can talk to? someone - how do i say this - a smidgen less irritating?  ❞ ❝  miss the target, you owe me fifty push-ups. hit it, you owe me twenty.  ❞ ❝  oh. serious talk coming.  ❞ ❝  i feel like one more lie'd be the last bitter drop in a chalice full of sorrow.  ❞ ❝  romantic? thought we came here as friends.  ❞ ❝  you’re hiding something. and that’s one thing i can’t stand.  ❞ ❝  tell me, how do you do it? always manage to pull yourself together, focus, no matter what’s happening?  ❞ ❝  i go wherever i please, whenever i please.  ❞ ❝  uh oh. i know that look.  ❞ ❝  sounds tempting. so tempting i don’t think i can refuse.  ❞ ❝  so, what do you say to a moonlight ride on horseback...and dinner?  ❞ ❝  perhaps...perhaps you’d stay just a bit longer?  ❞ ❝  how are you feeling? sleep well?  ❞ ❝  such a gloomy subject to broach...  simply shouldn’t have.  ❞

❝  such a gloomy subject to broach...i simply shouldn’t have --- not during our romantic dinner.  ❞ ❝  got it. a bit of blackmail --- just your style.  ❞ ❝  it’s the crack of dawn. where do you wanna go?  ❞ ❝  shut up before you wake someone. last thing we need is a crowd.  ❞ ❝  watch what you say. the trees have ears.  ❞ ❝  no bow at hand, no spear. my sword was all i had.  ❞ ❝  never expected you’d take such an interest in my private life.  ❞ ❝  i’m special. always was the rare beauty.  ❞ ❝  damn. been ages since we last saw each other.  ❞ ❝  some charming orchards nearby. in bloom, even, so you almost can't smell the corpses.  ❞ ❝  you know me. nothing i like more than breaking rules.  ❞ ❝  man spends his whole life learning.  ❞ ❝  if only i was as skilled with my words as i am with my blade.  ❞ ❝  i wished to know what was going on in that head of yours. i thought perhaps i could help.  ❞ ❝  i can tell something’s bothering you.  ❞ ❝  dangerous times. each thinks five times before sticking their neck out.   and i can’t blame them.  ❞ ❝  now i care not in the slightest how you think or feel.  ❞ ❝  i no longer know if i still hate you.  ❞ ❝  i see how you look at me, and i see you wither.  ❞ ❝  one last bit of advice --- find a new tavern. everyone here knows you.  ❞ ❝  you won. no point bothering with ‘what ifs’.  ❞ ❝  it’s time i took fate into my own hands. lived life anew...and truly, this time.  ❞ ❝  ahh, 'cause you thought you'd killed me that time. surprise, sur-fucking-prise.  ❞ ❝  who...who’s that? gods, i’m hallucinating.  ❞ ❝  it’s no exaggeration to say i’ve never met a warrior like you in my life. you’re lithe as an eel and strong as a bear.  ❞ ❝  i’ve a heart again, yet all it feels is grief, sadness and defeat. my life is a ruin.  ❞ ❝  sought only to protect myself. in doing so, i put you in harm’s way. forgive me.  ❞ ❝  there’s a charming grove nearby where  kisses  taste  sweeter than anywhere else in the world.  ❞ ❝  you’ve handled tougher situations. you’ll figure this one out.  ❞ ❝  who you are and why you’ve come matter little. for you’ll not leave this place alive.  ❞ ❝  i’m not panicking. just trying to be realistic.  ❞ ❝  hahahahaha...i can’t believe you fell for that!  ❞ ❝  i was actually going to recite an anthem praising your glory, but if you’re not in the mood...  ❞ ❝  lying didn’t always come so easily to you.  ❞ ❝  everyone wants to rule. i can do that better than any monarch.  ❞ ❝  tell me what you want already, and make it quick.  ❞ ❝  what a mess we made of it all...if i’d only known then how it would end...  ❞ ❝  seems a faded dream now, but there were a time where i was happy.  ❞ ❝  why’d you leave me? you claimed you loved me.  ❞ ❝  never liked boats. not one bit.  ❞ ❝  you must be mad. i’ve no intention to make things easier for you.  ❞ ❝  i don’t wish to look at your face any longer than i must.  ❞ ❝  please, no. i can’t stand spells.  ❞ ❝  we agreed not to keep any secrets from one another. we promised.  ❞ ❝  that i like! a man who boldly dares, damn the risks!  ❞ ❝  i thought you bowed before no man.  ❞ ❝  smile a bit wider. ...you were meant to smile, not bare your teeth.  ❞ ❝  is that blood? have you hurt yourself?  ❞ ❝  no reason to trouble the guards. i’ll go willingly.  ❞ ❝  look at me. promise you’ll stay out of it.  ❞ ❝  the minute we’re in trouble, you make me responsible for getting us out.  ❞ ❝  they say they don’t fear the wrath of the gods. and you, do you fear it?  ❞ ❝  i’ll let that pass. i know grief eats at your heart.  ❞ ❝  we all lie sometimes. but lying to yourself is running away, whereas there’s really nowhere to run.  ❞ ❝  don’t need your sympathy, just your help.  ❞ ❝  your loss -- it must hurt, bad. but there wasn't anything we could do.  ❞ ❝  i wish to leave, go far away. and i’d like you to come with me.  ❞ ❝  i trust you have an explanation for this. a very good one.  ❞ ❝  lot of bitterness in you.  ❞ ❝  i assure you, you’re excellent at covering your tracks --- though not terribly subtle. but i’m even better at uncovering them.  ❞ ❝  glad to see you happy...but i don’t think what we did was right.  ❞ ❝  i look at you, and...and feel like i am exactly where i am supposed to be. at long last.  ❞ ❝  i’m no coward. i'll not run this time.  ❞ ❝  yes, i know you’ve trained with swords. but you’re still shit with them.  ❞ ❝  how many innocents have you cut down?  ❞ ❝  problem is, you’re not ordinary. you were born to greatness.  ❞ ❝  not too late to surrender.  ❞ ❝  men turn honest when they feel a blade at their throat.  ❞ ❝  i'm not gonna drink. why dull my senses when i’m in such pleasant company?  ❞ ❝  it’s bound to come in handy, and each time it does, you’ll think of me.  ❞ ❝  lie still or you will bleed to death.  ❞ ❝  your life is yours, exclusively. you choose who you are.  ❞ ❝  for a minute there, was almost sure you’d leave me to die.  ❞ ❝  there is never a second opportunity to make a first impression.  ❞ ❝  it’s all because of that secretiveness of yours.  ❞ ❝  plead the gods spare us, for without their favor we shall most certainly perish.  ❞ ❝  i must say -- seen a lot, but nothing like this, never.  ❞ ❝  you don’t look like you can get home on your own. i’ll walk you.  ❞ ❝  all’s in the past, never to be restored.  ❞ ❝  you know full well i never hold a grudge. i forgive you.  ❞ ❝  the good gods sent you to me.  ❞ ❝  and the guilt, the responsibility of all this, lies with me.  ❞ ❝  you’ve only been here five minutes, and you’ve already managed to offend me twice.  ❞ ❝  you will certainly fetch me a higher bounty alive.  ❞ ❝  what's wrong with my beard? always thought it added to my dignity.  ❞ ❝  if i’m to die today, i wish to look smashing for the occasion.  ❞ ❝  i was stupid. stupidity costs a lot.  ❞ ❝  even your humblest requests seem like threats.  ❞ ❝  your motives do not interest me. only results.  ❞ ❝  and you laughed, oh, how sweetly, how brightly you laughed!  ❞ ❝  you don’t know how it is. to see someone you love die. because of you, for you.  ❞ ❝  to have a scapegoat --- that’s the key.  ❞ ❝  no need to fear me.  ❞ ❝  sorry, but -- your life story? just not interested.  ❞ ❝  with you...it was love at first sight.  ❞ ❝  gotta understand. you don’t betray people like me.  ❞ ❝  i struggled long to find a place where i’d feel safe, needed. until i finally arrived here.  ❞ ❝  just don’t faint on me.  ❞ ❝  could never be there for you everyday. but i’m happy to see you always. and today, i’m all yours.  ❞ ❝  what others think...your image...that’s all you care about.  ❞ ❝  in these foul times one must be wary, even of their friends.  ❞ ❝  come on, don’t get angry - it’s not good for you..  ❞ ❝  so, apart from the sword play, you know potions and all that?  ❞ ❝  i actually envy your sense of wonder --- common in children, and morons.  ❞ ❝  a lot of misfortune for a small village.  ❞ ❝  who are you? do you seek to hurt me as well?  ❞ ❝  the hand that feeds can also strike its wayward wards.  ❞ ❝  shh. eat now. we’ll speak once you’ve rested.  ❞ ❝  brother has turned against brother, the land is soaked in blood. evil reigns stronger than ever before.  ❞ ❝  good looking and clever. where’ve you been hiding?  ❞ ❝  doesn’t bother you, having monsters for neighbours?  ❞ ❝  stay here --- no matter what happens.  ❞ ❝  i never told you this, but i’ve always felt it: i love you.  ❞ ❝  listen to me this once -- don't take matters into your own hands.  ❞ ❝  love these moments. the air before a battle -- nothing smells as sweet.  ❞ ❝  they tried to get in through the main gate. i’m afraid they could succeed next time.  ❞ ❝  too many claim you’re evil.  ❞ ❝  why are you so eager to help strangers? sit your ass down or there’ll be misfortune.  ❞ ❝  you'd never have managed without me, would you? come, now, admit it.  ❞ ❝  for those who remain, death should never take precedence over life.  ❞ ❝  thanks for coming. thanks for risking your life for me.  ❞ ❝  don’t force me to speak of it. no more, please.  ❞ ❝  when doubt plagues your mind, follow your instincts. should they steer you wrong and land you in muck, you'll land at peace with yourself. and that's most important.  ❞ ❝   just know that i know you're here. one misstep, one error...you'll make a mistake, it's inevitable...i'll be the first to learn it.  ❞ ❝  i do not know you. i’ve done you no harm.  ❞ ❝  try not to panic...just doesn’t suit you.  ❞ ❝  we’ve come a long way, and i’ll be damned if we’ve come to fail.  ❞ ❝  had i known what would happen here, i'd never have come.  ❞ ❝  i can say i’ve seen it all now.  ❞ ❝  these scars have long yearned for your tender caress.  ❞ ❝  i don’t fall victim to curses. i cast them.  ❞ ❝  come outside. we can hold hands and stare at the sky.  ❞ ❝  we’ll work well together --- i can see that already.  ❞ ❝  from the first moment i set eyes upon you that fateful evening, my heart has only beaten for you.  ❞ ❝  i trust you as much as you trust me --- not at all.  ❞ ❝  you’ve gone all red in the face just for talking about it.  ❞ ❝  wake up. it’s just a dream. wake up!  ❞ ❝  i still don’t believe everything that happened.  ❞ ❝  i never miss twice.  ❞ ❝  bit too old to believe in bedtime stories, aren’t you?  ❞ ❝  you humans have...unusual tastes.  ❞ ❝  didn’t think it worthwhile to tell me, warn me of your plans?  ❞ ❝  i think you will not attack one unarmed.  ❞ ❝  the deeper i get into this, the more i gotta wonder...why’re you even helping me?  ❞ ❝  to live in peace, we first must kill.  ❞ ❝  at times fate muddles our path, and life turns toilsome, hard to bear.  ❞ ❝  i fight for whoever’s paying the best. or whoever’s easier to rob.  ❞ ❝  do not let my beauty distract your aim.  ❞ ❝  i’ve seen what is to come, i know destruction approaches.  ❞ ❝  the war awoke an ancient power. an evil one that feeds on bloodshed.  ❞ ❝  guess you’re no stranger to fury, either.  ❞ ❝  think i’m gonna fall for that? no chance, you’re wrong.  ❞ ❝  gotta admit --- you do pretty well with a sword.  ❞ ❝  you dare tell me to calm down?! you?!  ❞ ❝  let's say i go about my business, and when there's coin to be earned, i don't readily turn it down.  ❞ ❝  i wish to know the truth...be it sweet, be it painful, i wish to know.  ❞ ❝  men, the polite ones at least, would call me a monster.  ❞ ❝  even i grow ill at the sight of you.  ❞ ❝  i’m going on a walk. or is that not allowed either? because i could break my leg?  ❞ ❝  plan’s crazier than it is sane...but there’s an irrestistible charm to it.  ❞ ❝  unbelievable! you said something romantic! you!  ❞ ❝  we may not survive this. in fact, our chances are slim.  ❞ ❝  if anything should happen to you...  ❞ ❝  there’s not been a dark cloud yet that didn’t have a silver lining.  ❞ ❝  those are some fresh lookin’ scars you’ve got there.  ❞ ❝  no. no more about the battle. just hold me. and say something nice.  ❞ ❝  stay. this is the only home we’ve ever had.  ❞ ❝  you’re so charming when you try to be funny.  ❞ ❝  not proud of it...yet i considered all the options and found none better.  ❞ ❝  i look far different from when you last saw me.  ❞ ❝  i admire your optimism. wish i shared it.  ❞ ❝  and...try not to draw any attention to yourself.  ❞ ❝  nightmares haunt our nights and days. folk sleepwalk from their homes, never to return.  ❞ ❝  forgive me. it couldn’t be avoided. i truly am sorry.  ❞ ❝  well i’ve departed, escaped, been forced to flee so many times…yet i always returned. you ought to be used to it by now.  ❞ ❝  the human mind is as wild and unexplored a place as any land far beyond the sea.  ❞ ❝  you think you’ve won. you are wrong. i can’t die.  ❞ ❝  you’re something more. something more.  ❞ ❝  barely nicked me, i’ll be fine.  ❞ ❝  it’s just that i felt...stifled, in your shadow. i’d have suffocated had i stayed.  ❞ ❝  come, don’t just stand there. i want a hug.  ❞ ❝  it’s lovely here! i could stay forever.  ❞ ❝  do what you will, but leave me out of this.  ❞ ❝  we should end this discussion -- before i say something i'll regret.  ❞ ❝  you all right? you’re as pale as death.  ❞ ❝  let’s get back to the hut. i’ll protect you along the way.  ❞ ❝  not to keen on talking about it, are you?  ❞ ❝  it’s better to die than to live in the knowledge that you’ve done something that needs forgiveness.  ❞ ❝  i was afraid you were dead.  ❞ ❝  at times one must use reason, rather than blades.  ❞ ❝  need some peace. gotta prepare.  ❞ ❝  i suspected it might not be the best idea, but i was desperate, had no choice.  ❞ ❝  so tell me how it happened. step by step.  ❞ ❝  it was a bit of a lark, a jest. i meant to bring it all back, i swear.  ❞ ❝  if i wanted to kill you, you'd be long dead by now.  ❞ ❝  that is precisely one of the reasons why i abhor your world.    your senseless brutality.  ❞ ❝  i won’t let them take you, you know that?  ❞ ❝  magic...childish hocus-pocus. it’s just not interesting. what i find fascinating are true tales of true human lives.  ❞ ❝  save your praise for others. i couldn’t give a shit.  ❞ ❝  well, well, i am impressed. doubted you still had it in you, frankly.  ❞ ❝  i like you. don’t make me hurt you.  ❞ ❝  you know very little can hurt you being immortal, so you take wild risks, chase extreme sensations. there comes a point you’ve done it all, and all seems boring and monotonous.  ❞ ❝  with you i finally feel...harmony. a calm. feel like things are the way they're supposed to be.  ❞ ❝  i'm afraid the dishwater’s as good as it gets in this establishment.  ❞ ❝  sorry to take so long, but i had to deal with the guards.  ❞ ❝  i’d never miss a chance to spend a pleasant evening with you.  ❞ ❝  you know too much. yet one more reason why you must die.  ❞ ❝  or perhaps you seek to trick me.  ❞ ❝  if you acknowledge any gods...start praying, now.  ❞ ❝  it’s very simple. you either deceived me...or not.  ❞ ❝  i am known neither for my sense of humor nor for my patience.  ❞ ❝  naturally, it would be easier with your help, but...you irritate me.  ❞ ❝  love questions like that. am i holding up? what, my dick?  ❞ ❝  we never hunt in these woods. not even if it means the whole village starves.  ❞ ❝  we’re only ever the ones to know the truth about ourselves.  ❞ ❝  you’re insolent because you believe i cannot afford to hurt you. and you’re right.  ❞ ❝  i detest graveyards, especially wandering them alone.  ❞ ❝  you know too much. you impede me too often. and i find your arrogance an annoyance.  ❞ ❝  i know it’s wartime, but try not to be a hero, all right?  ❞ ❝  i don’t know that i’ll make for engaging company. in truth, i rarely talk to men.  ❞ ❝  you know...had a dream about you recently.  ❞ ❝  i thought i could at least count on you to treat me seriously.  ❞ ❝  don’t ask questions you know the answers to. it makes you look stupid.  ❞ ❝  you’re nosy. starting to piss me off, you know?  ❞ ❝  what did i do to deserve this? have i given you cause to doubt my intentions?  ❞ ❝  don’t fret about me. i always get by somehow, right?  ❞ ❝  i wanted to go with you --- that was my idea.  ❞ ❝  i shan’t stray a step from your side.  ❞ ❝  if that’s what it takes to save the world, it’s better to let that world die.  ❞ ❝  what’s that supposed to mean? that a threat?  ❞ ❝  i’m offering a great and true adventure, an experience like no other, the fate of only the chosen few.  ❞ ❝  that’s like choosing between pestilence and the plague.  ❞ ❝  what’s it matter? i only ever thought of you.  ❞ ❝  did you know you’ve gained twenty-seven new scars since we’ve last saw each other?  ❞ ❝  i need to know the details if you want me to get my hands dirty.  ❞ ❝  don’t know you. go away.  ❞ ❝  ever vigilant, even in your sleep. quite vampire-like, in fact.  ❞ ❝  gotten used to people treating me like a freak, an outcast.  ❞ ❝  we share a cause, then. just like the old days.  ❞ ❝  ever considered becoming a burglar? skill like that’d come in awful handy.  ❞ ❝  there’s never been a frown that couldn’t be turned upside down.  ❞ ❝  honesty's an attribute of the truly brave --- and thus the privilege of the very few.  ❞ ❝  you do not have a monopoly in altruism, my friend.  ❞ ❝  great love demands great sacrifices.  ❞ ❝  i believe it wise at times to share one’s secrets, unburden oneself to those one can trust.  ❞ ❝  it would be nice from time to time if you could sit back and enjoy life, instead of going around solving everyone’s problems.  ❞ ❝  we shall dance until the break of dawn!  ❞ ❝  a man could lose his head for a lass like you.  ❞ ❝  don’t have to come if you don’t want. wait here.  ❞ ❝  never seen this side of you.  ❞ ❝  i’m to kiss the ground you walk on, is that it? but you just did your duty.  ❞ ❝  the day you give me a smile...that moment, that’s what i’m waiting for.  ❞ ❝  i need a soul intelligent and clever, an individual who fears no dare. someone like you.  ❞ ❝  if i was you i’d catch some shut-eye, not go on flapping my tongue.  ❞ ❝  the plan is simple...which does not mean it will be easy to execute.  ❞ ❝  sometimes you really get on my nerves, you know.  ❞ ❝  you shall not turn on me, use what i say against me? you shall not tell anyone?  ❞ ❝  gave you a chance. should’ve taken it.  ❞ ❝  always better to do a bit more and even gain nothing by it,    than to do too little and face regret.  ❞ ❝  it’s lovely out here. the birds singing, the bees buzzing...blissful, really.  ❞ ❝  what a lovely dress. the color suits you exquisitely.  ❞ ❝  pretty fantastic tale. hard as hell to believe.  ❞ ❝  it’s time you discovered my romantic side.  ❞ ❝  you gotta understand the whole world doesn’t revolve around you.  ❞ ❝  can you not see i am out of my mind with worry?  ❞ ❝  every rose has its thorn, and there are no happy endings.  ❞ ❝  pretty quick to reject help. why is that?  ❞ ❝  don’t need to like each other. just gotta do our jobs.  ❞ ❝  frankly, if i can do something for you, i'll do it, willingly.  ❞ ❝  you were hired you kill me, were you not?  ❞ ❝  what’s it like, going toe to toe with a monster? knowing you’ve only two options --- to kill or be killed?  ❞ ❝  this place --- there’s evil here. death hangs in the air.  ❞ ❝  intellect counts as much as strength.  ❞ ❝  i run back inside, hasp the doors, and then i hear it --- someone whispering my name.  ❞ ❝  you know i like you. unlike the rest of this lot, you’ve got a good head on your shoulders.  ❞ ❝  if you love somebody, set them free.  ❞ ❝  if you hate me so deeply, why don’t you tell me to my face?  ❞ ❝  i’m afraid you’d not realize which way the wind was blowing if you pissed straight into it.  ❞ ❝  that was courageous. i'd never expect it from you.  ❞ ❝  i am not easily impressed, but i must admit you have succeeded, my dear.  ❞ ❝  kill me if you must. i’ve nothing to live for anyway.  ❞ ❝  aren’t you an extraordinary beauty.  ❞ ❝  never suspected you believed such things.  ❞ ❝  wait...you want to go with me? out of the question.  ❞ ❝  used to it. not the first time i’ve been hunted.  ❞ ❝  enough of this hesitation, this fretting, these feelings of guilt!  ❞ ❝  strange working with you. strange, but great.  ❞ ❝  give me a moment. i must don something more appropiate and concealing.  ❞ ❝  killing comes as naturally to me as blowing my nose.  ❞ ❝  ......   another tale of a life compromised and ultimately claimed by greed and ambition.  ❞ ❝  in the future, though, remember this --- i can look after myself  ❞ ❝  you'd really worry about me if i went on alone?  ❞ ❝  you have many merits. you merely hide them from the world very diligently.  ❞ ❝  is it true virtue always trumps villainy?  ❞ ❝  watch my movements. i’m spry as a cat and sly as a fox.  ❞ ❝  ah, if only this could last forever.  ❞ ❝  few i can rely on like i can on you. kinda hoping you think the same of me.  ❞ ❝  you are angry at the whole world. you feel inferior, feel pain, though you mask this with confidence, arrogance, even.  ❞ ❝  there exist worries for which there quite simply is no other medicine.  ❞ ❝  your bones look thin, your breathing’s wheezy. afraid one punch might kill you.  ❞ ❝  to love is to build a house of cards, or play a game of chess, but one word or ill-thought move and you must start it all afresh.  ❞ ❝  i’m doing what i ever wanted to do, being who i wanted to be. i believe that’s one definition of happiness.  ❞ ❝  you’ve not an ounce of refinement in you, have you?  ❞ ❝  pain rules the body, but fear is born in the heart.  ❞ ❝  either i get burned, or i’ll burn all else down. no other options.  ❞ ❝  should you decide your sword is the sole solution, i shall not stand in your way.  ❞ ❝  c’mon, come closer.  ❞ ❝  would you prefer i treated you like the lying manipulater you are?  ❞ ❝  i regret nothing. one lives but once.  ❞ ❝  i just hope this tale has a happy ending. for me, for you. for everyone.  ❞ ❝  just gonna go our seperate ways? no parting words?  ❞ ❝  you still stand to be quite useful to me.  ❞ ❝  i suppose you wanted to frighten me...alas, you didn’t in the least. after all, i’m a monster too, am i not?  ❞ ❝  i trust no one. learned that long ago.  ❞ ❝  it cannot be! you actually have a sense of humor.  ❞ ❝  didn’t ask for a lecture on probability. need a simple answer --- yes or no.  ❞ ❝  another word, and i shall spill even more blood. yours.  ❞ ❝  you feel resentment, i understand, but we shall work through all the unfortunate matters of the past.  ❞ ❝  stop playing dumb. i know everything...your plan.  ❞ ❝  honestly can’t see what all those dames see in you --- you’re a stick in the mud.  ❞ ❝  not showy, lovely location...perfect for romantic getaways.  ❞ ❝  i hope you’re not upset i came like this, without warning...  ❞ ❝  i’m still a long way from mastering anything. but i am trying.  ❞ ❝  now i know how you do it. just annoy your opponents to death.  ❞ ❝  word on the street is there’s a hefty bounty on your head.  ❞ ❝  for a few days now i’ve been having dizzy spells.  ❞ ❝  i’ve always had a way with ostensibly dangerous types.  ❞ ❝  wound doesn’t look good.    patch that up quick if i were you, before it starts festering.  ❞ ❝  always seemed to me you were a very complicated creature, by nature. not one to resort to such simple methods like drinking your worries away.  ❞ ❝  may i be honest? yes, i’m nervous. i really would prefer to just run off.  ❞ ❝  father always said a wise man learns from others’ mistakes, so here i am, learning from his.  ❞ ❝  ever since that horrid night...everything has changed.  ❞ ❝  what’s wrong? afraid? gut feeling queasy?  ❞ ❝  used to bother me, all your secrets...now i know if you have something to tell me, you’ll tell me.  ❞ ❝  i so don’t feel like going anywhere. sit here a while longer?  ❞ ❝  there’s something i’d like to know...how can you be so damned calm?  ❞ ❝  my knees quake like a carnival rattle.  ❞ ❝  honestly didn’t think this’d work. doubted anything would happen.  ❞

[arvinsescape]

Minnie

A/N: Been a couple weeks since i’ve had time to write. Hope you enjoy, this got kinda long.

Summary: The story of how you and Tom ended up owning a cat.

W/C: 1.8K

You and Tom had been walking Tess around the park as normal when you noticed Tess stop at a nearby bush. Assuming she’d spotted a stick to bring along on the walk, you continued on when you noticed that she wasn’t following. You turned around and watched as she continued to stare at the bush, seemingly at nothing. Wondering what she was so interested in, you made your way in her direction when she suddenly barked and ran towards the two of you. Deciding she was just being odd, you went to carry on your walk when she barked again and ran back to the same bush she’d come from as if asking you to follow her, you gave Tom a look as if to ask what on Earth was going on, he just shrugged and followed Tess, you just behind.

“What’ve you found Tess?” Tom asked as he neared the bush she was still barking at.

On closer inspection, your heart melted as you saw what it was she was so interested in. It was an incredibly small little kitten. It was shivering and whimpering as if it had been there a while. You looked around for any sign of more kittens and a mother cat, but you couldn’t see anything. You looked at Tom who had been incredibly quiet, it was no secret that he wasn’t the biggest fan of cats but even he would have to admit the small animal was incredibly cute and in need of help, he might have hated cats but he wasn’t heartless.

Tess tentatively moved towards the kitten and sniffed it before licking it, she really was an angel, not an aggressive bone in her body. “What should we do? I don’t think it belongs to anyone and it doesn’t appear to have a mum.”

“Well it’s a Sunday and it’s 6 o clock, the vets aren’t open, and the nearest shelter is quite a drive away.” He concluded, you knew what he was getting at, he just didn’t want to say it.

“Should we take it home? Look after it until tomorrow when we can get it a vet’s appointment and they can make sure it gets to a good home or shelter?” You knew he wasn’t going to say no, the poor thing needed help and he wasn’t a monster, he wouldn’t just leave it.

“Well if we don’t I doubt it’ll make it through the night.” He replied as you were already picking it up and wrapping it into your coat and enveloping the small animal into your warmth. You grinned at him as you leaned up on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek. He might not have liked cats, but you certainly did, and you decided that this was probably the closest you’d ever to get to having a cat whilst you were with Tom.

“Don’t get too attached though Y/N, we can’t keep it. I’m not cruel enough to let it die but I still don’t like cats.” He teased as he grinned back at you. You wondered in your giddy little fantasy if by the end of this you’d change his mind and he’d let you keep it, but he was incredibly stubborn so you’d let it be a giddy fantasy.

Once you’d made it home you’d decided that whilst you were trying to warm the small animal up properly, Tom would go to the shops and get it anything it may need. Tess watched your every move as you nursed the kitten back to some sort of warmth, she was wagging her tail as she watched.

“Maybe we can convince your dad to keep it.” You teased as you grinned at Tess before stroking her. She barked excitedly, almost as if she was agreeing to your words. You smiled to yourself as you continued to attend to the kitten. Deciding it was incredibly soft and she surely wouldn’t mind you placed the kitten in Tess’s bed, your heart melting instantly at the sight, it looked so small in such a big bed. Tom came through the door not a minute later, all the items you’d read you would need in his arms.

“Okay, we should probably- aww.” He cut himself short as he looked at the kitten on the bed. “It really is small isn’t it?” he cooed, you grinned as you looked at him, when he looked back his face somewhat hardened as he pointed a finger teasingly at you “this doesn’t mean anything.”

“I didn’t think it did.” You grinned back, knowing full well what was going on in his head. He just didn’t want to admit that small animal was quickly taking a place in his heart.

“Right we really should start making sure it eats something.” He said as he helped you tend to the animal.

****

It was 3am when you made your way to bed, having spent hours tending to the kitten, you surmised that there really was nothing more you could do, you’d fed it and warmed it up. It still hadn’t moved much but it was breathing.

“Okay baby, I can’t stay awake any longer, I’m going to have to head to bed.” You said as you got up from the couch.

“Okay darling, I love you.” he said as he got up to give you a kiss and a cuddle, you pulled back in confusion. “You’re not coming with?” you asked.

“Nah, I’ll stay up another couple hours and feed it again.” He said as he sat back down and looked at the kitten that was now curled up in the bed with Tess, the sight had made both your hearts melt.

“Okay, I love you.” You said as you made your way to bed, huge grin on your face. Maybe your fantasy wasn’t going to be a fantasy after all.

****

You woke up around 11pm, you felt strangely cold even though the temperature in the room was far from cold. You turned over and noticed Tom wasn’t in bed with you and judging by the coolness of his side of the bed, you guessed he’d been out of bed a while, if he’d even been in it at all. You made your way downstairs and into the living room. You stopped as you took in the sight before you. Tom was asleep on the couch, Tess next to him and you didn’t miss the tiny little kitten laying on his chest as it slept soundly.

Tess was the first to realise you’d entered the room as she bounced from the couch and made her way over to you, you petted her and let her into the garden for a little while. As you made your way back into the living room you noticed Tom was awake now, you grinned at him.

“Don’t say a word.” He said as he looked at your smiling face.

“It climb up there when you were sleeping?” you teased.

“Something like that, yeah.”

****

After booking an emergency vets appointment you were sat in the waiting room as you waited for your name to be called.

“Tess seemed sad to see it go, don’t you think.” You asked.

“She did actually.” He said. No witty comeback? You thought he’d have something jokey to say back. You sat in a comfortable silence as you held the kitten wrapped up in your blanket. Your name was called as you made your way into the vet’s room.

“So, who have we got here?” The vet asked as she took the kitten from you.

“It doesn’t have a name, we found it yesterday when we were out walking.” You explained.

“I see. So, I’m going to have a look at it for you now.” She smiled as she weighed the kitten, it had seemingly gained a little more life, managing to stand on it’s legs and move around a little. “It’s quite underweight” she said as she started examining it further.

“Yeah, we guessed it might be, we fed it what we could, but we read online that you don’t wanna over feed them. I hope we did the right thing.” Tom said as he seemingly grew concerned for the little kitten. The vet looked at him and smiled.

“You absolutely did, I don’t think it would have survived the night if you hadn’t taken it in.” She answered as she continued to check over the animal. After a few minutes she looked back up at you. “Well it’s a girl and by looks of things only about 4 months old. She will need quite a few vaccinations and flea treatment, I think it may have been wild.”

“4 months? But it’s absolutely tiny.” You said, genuinely shocked at the age of the kitten.

“I can only assume she was the runt and unfortunately most wild animals leave the runt, survival of the fittest and all that.” She said as she gave the kitten everything that it needed. You sighed as you heard the news, the poor thing. After another few minutes the vet was done.

“Okay, I have given her all the treatment that I can for now. She needs to put a lot of weight on, I suppose the question now is what to do with her. We have quite a few shelters that are brilliant and will look after her and find her a home as quick as they can.”

Unbeknownst to you Tom had been eyeing you carefully throughout the exchange and he’d surprised himself at the decision he’d come to. You just looked so sad at the thought of the little thing leaving, how could he not? And anyway it was cute and he reasoned in his mind that this kitten owed him one so it wouldn’t turn out evil and he’d be able to trust it. He’d made up his mind as he spoke.

“What if we want to keep her?”

“What?” You asked as you turned to him shocked expression and tears gathering in your eyes.

“What if we keep her.” He said again as he took in your expression. Yeah, keeping this kitten was definitely worth it, if only for the look on your face right now.

“You’re serious?” You asked as you cried happily.

“Deadly, darling” he grinned. You engulfed him in a tight hug as you thanked him and kissed his face all over. The vet grinned at the exchange.

“So what are we going to call her?” The vet asked as she handed Tom the registration forms.

“I don’t know, what do you think darling?” he asked as he looked at you.

“Minnie. You know like the mouse and also how small she is.” You said as you grinned at him. You didn’t think you could fall more in love with the brown eyed, brown haired man, but here he was proving you wrong. He started to write her name as he continued to fill out the forms.

“Minnie. Perfect.”

[captain039]

Don’t let me go

The huntsman x reader

(Snow White and the huntsman, Chris Hemsworth)

Warnings: Gore, ABO, light swearing, magic things, light angst, idk

You stared at the world around, the voices screeching in your ear, telling you what to do, who you should be. The ground was cold and wet under you, your back soaked in mud and the rain pouring down on you. You struggled the breath, struggled to move so they didn't catch you. Why’d she want you dead? The queen doesn’t know you, doesn’t know anything about you and suddenly it’s your death or nothing. You didn’t know you could run that fast, being mere miles away from the dark forest had its benefit of nobody venturing into your small town, yet the queen was so angry she sent her brother after you. Unsure of what you did you fled, trying to save your family and village.

You eyes had gone blurry, the trees moved to you with their pointy branches, the sky was so grey and groggy it made you sick.

You closed your eyes savoured the earth under you as it might be the last you ever feel it.

Your body jolted though, you were being moved you figured this was the end till warmth spread through you.

“Come on” you heard a voice, deep and soothing almost despite its grunting.

“Wake up!” You heard a more feminine voice this time and frowned seeing a figure to your left. You stumbled in the persons arms, gained your feet and ran with them.

You neared the edge of the forest, your mind still fuzzed, a huntsman by the looks and a young woman, you didn’t know who she was.

“We mean you no harm” the young woman spoke and you frowned lifting your head seeing women in boats, you hadn’t even noticed them.

“What’s wrong with her?” They asked and you frowned.

“She’s been exposed, it’ll pass” the man spoke by your side and you frowned at him.

“Exposed?” You said almost drunken like.

“Get in” the woman said as you were led into the boat.

You awoke, warm and dry on a bed with a sheet over you. You opened your eyes slowly it was dark out, the only light from the flames by the fire.

“Ah there you are” you groaned sitting up as a woman helped you.

“Easy now dear” she said her voice kind.

“What happened?” You mumbled mind rushing back.

“You passed out in the boat” she said and you nodded rubbing your eyes.

“Why- why did the queen want me?” You whispered shifting so your feet hit the floor. You stood and stumbled but the woman sat you back down hushing you gently.

“My mother’s dead! My brother- I” you shook eyes blurring with tears.

“It’s alright child” she pulled you close, she held you, her scent that of an aged beta, calming.

“You’re awake” you frowned looking to the huts door and seeing the young woman.

“Thank you for helping me” you said wiping your eyes quickly and pulling away from the woman.

“The queen wants you too” she walked in and stood by you.

“Why she want you?” You asked, she didn’t look like anything special, beautiful sure, but just an ordinary girl.

“I’m the kings daughter” you froze at her words.

“Princess?” You muttered and she nodded.

“Why did she want you?” She asked and you shrugged.

“I don’t know” you mumbled.

“You’re special” the woman beside you spoke and you looked to her.

“How?” You said confused.

“You’re an omega” you frowned at her words that wasn’t uncommon?

“There’s omegas everywhere” you sighed thinking she was just suddenly insane.

“No there’s not” you stared at her confused.

“The queen executed them, your homes by the dark forest yes?” She asked and you nodded.

“She won’t go near that place, she has no power there” you tried to process, you really did.

“I left the village to get a cow from the market, I disguised myself as my brother” you muttered. Your brother was ill, you’ve been acting like him from time to time when going out, safer to travel.

“Someone would’ve caught you” she whispered and you clenched your fist, nails digging into your palm.

“Damn it” you said eyes watering again as you realised the whole fate of your village laid on your shoulders, they were dead, you watched the flames as you ran, the slaughter.

“The huntsman was after me, he had a change of heart before he found you” the princess spoke.

“A change of heart?” You almost scoffed.

“He’s a huntsman” you said.

“They don’t have hearts” you stared at the fire, memories flooding back.

You laughed while your brother chased you around the village, the older ones laughing as you both caused a ruckus.

“Y/n! Oliver!” You turned to your mother’s call and laughed as you both ran over trying to trip each other.

“Ah goodness ya both a mess” she sighed as you heard a horse approaching. Your mother looked up her eyes wide with tears in it. You looked too your heart pounding at the sight of your father.

“Daddy!” Your brother called running to him as he dismounted and embraced your brother tightly.

“Little Olly” he said as you walked to them.

“My little princess” he whispered cupping your cheek.

“Come here” he said softly and you wrapped your little arms around his neck.

“I missed you both” he whispered as he let you down and embraced your mother.

“They’ve grown” he chuckled to your mother who nodded with tears in her eyes.

“Look at you!” He knelt back down cupping your cheeks.

“Bigger than your brother” he chuckled as Oliver pouted.

“You’ll be a big man one day son don’t you worry” your father pet his cheek with a big smile. Time froze though as he jolted, an arrow through his heart. Screams rang out and the slaughter began. You were carried, torn away as you watched your father die. You were hidden away before it all stopped. Your mother bloodied but alive as she held you both close.

“Never trust a huntsman” she whispered.

“Men like him have no heart nor will they” you said.

“You-“ the princess began to speak but the loud cry tore all your gazes outside.

“Quickly!” The woman grabbed you both and ran out the back, the huts ablaze with fire and the queens men tearing the village down.

“Come now!” The women herded you out the back, through the water and to the boats.

“Huntsman!” The princess said as you saw him coming through the tall grass.

“Go!” The woman cried pushing you towards him.

“Wait-“ you said as she shook her head.

“Go now!” You tan with them both through the tall grass.

You ran for ages it felt like, your small rest reminding you of how exhausted you truely are.

“I can’t-“ you collapsed legs aching, chest burning. You laid on the grass, took in deep gulps of air trying to sooth the burn.

The princess and the huntsman stopped, the princess panting the and huntsman by your side.

“Go away” you said flinching as he went to touch you. He frowned at your words his blue eyes saddened.

“We need to keep moving” he said as you felt your heart finally slow down.

“She’s exhausted” the princess said coming to your side.

“Give me a minute” you mumbled as she handed you a canteen. You sighed drinking the water in it. You sat up slowly before nodding.

You moved for till the morning came, you were tired, legs trembling at each step, you weren’t use to running away. You froze though when something went around your foot and you were all hoisted up. Your back hit the huntsman sand you grunted as you tried to gain awareness.

“Beith” the huntsman sighed as you frowned seeing dwarfs around you.

“Ah Huntsman!” A dwarf said.

“Fancy seeing you out here” he added as you looked around but not spotting the one who spoke.

“You got two pretty little things by your side now huh?” You glared at the dwarf in front of you despite him not being the one who spoke.

“I think she might kill us” the dwarf said as you grunted and squirmed.

“Stop moving omega it’s no use” the huntsman sighed as you struggled.

“Cut us down Beith” he added.

“Do it” you heard another dwarf.

“It’s the princess” he added and you glanced to the princess.

“I have seen it” he muttered.

“Argh cut them down” you assumed Beith said as you landed on the ground harshly, your neck cramping along the way.

“Piss off!” You snapped as a dwarf came over.

“Alright!” He said hands up. You scrambled with your ropes before standing on your feet.

“She’s the one” you frowned looking to the princess who knelt in front of a blind dwarf.

“The darkness will end” he added smiling.

You traveled with the dwarves to the sanctuary, a place you’d never seen, fairies and little critters running around the lush grass. You smiled at the little rabbits running about, fluffy coats and little tails.

Night fell and you finally had a chance to lie down, Snow danced with Gus while the others sang. You had your back to the fire, holding the blanket close as tears silently fell from your eyes. Caught up in this mess for being an omega, your brother was one too, though he grew ill. Thinking back to everything you realise you were the only two, your mother coated your scents every day and night, she always told you, you needed to be careful around everyone, be on you guard.

You flinched when someone covered you with something.

“I’m not going to hurt you” you stared at the huntsman as he held a fur up.

“You were shaking” he said softly lying the pelt down over you.

“What’s it to you” you snapped with a hush voice.

“I don’t know what you think I am, but it isn’t right” he said and you glared.

“You’re a heartless man with an axe” you snapped.

“Monsters” you mumbled as you watched the hurt flash again. He sighed and sat back down, you kept your back turned as you tried to ignore the feeling in your stomach.

You watched your father die again, slowly, the arrow through him then an axe in his head, tearing his soul away as he fell. The Huntsman tore through your village, tore everything up before they left with their small victory. You cried violently over your fathers dead body, blood tears running down his eyes.

“Wake up!” You frowned as somebody shook you a voice echoing.

“Wake up! You shot up your dagger close as you looked around panting.

“Easy” you held your knife towards the huntsman as he held his hands up.

“You were crying out in your sleep” he said and you gulped. You had a layer of sweat covering your body, tears in your eyes. You lifted yourself and headed to the first ignoring his calls.

You pushed past trees and darkness before you fell to your knees and cried. You didn’t hold it back, didn’t silence it, you cried and cried till tears became streams. You heard someone approaching, cursed them as you knew who it was.

“Go away!” You cried turning to him.

“Leave me alone” you whispered as you felt him wrap his arms around you. You sobbed softly hesitant and struggling before leaning back into the embrace.

“Just let it out” he whispered as you cried softly. You held the arm around your shoulders, gripping his flesh.

Your tears dried and he sat back and made you sit back with him. You laid back against his chest looking at his boots outstretched besides you. His arms rested around your waist so you couldn’t leave, you stared at the moon in numb exhaustion.

“My father came home from a merchant trade” you began softly.

“I was five, my brother was four, he came off his horse and told us how big we had grown, embraced us before an arrow went through his heart and an axe in his head” you felt him tense behind you and you swallowed a lump in your throat.

“Huntsman had come through to kill our village leader and claim it as their own for their queen, they slaughtered and burned my village before leaving after their message had been heard that the village was owned” his grip tightened a little as you stopped.

“The queen was clouded by grief, she raised an army of children into Huntsman, she had one rule, to never love” he said.

“I fell in love, it cost me her life and others, so I escaped” his voice croaked a little and you held one hand over his.

“We were reckless ready to escape, but she died and I was sent out with grief of my own” you kept looking at the moon as he spoke, he was warm against you, comforting in a way you didn’t want.

“She wasn’t mine though, maybe we were desperate to feel something, it wasn’t the same feeling as- as this” he spoke softly and your heart raced in your ears as he spoke, you felt it too.

“What is this? I don’t know you” you said broken.

“I don’t know what this is, but I won’t let it go” he said as you felt a single tear drop.

“I won’t let you go” he muttered.

[prokaryotics]

the sacredness of shared meals

chapter 7 | masterlist

pairing: Boba Fett x Fem!Reader

words: 5.5k+

warnings: No (Y/N) - post sarlacc pit slowburn, the mandalorian season 2 spoilers, mild canon typical violence, a little bit of angst.

a/n: one more chapter until the end of the repost folks! thank god lmao 

“You were right to ask…” 

You fall in step beside each other as you exit the cantina. You’ve recovered and now only tremors remain of Boba’s dismissal. Set with a new, more pressing course of action, you’re finding it easier to talk. That or maybe it’s easier because the bounty hunter is no longer around to hear the waver in your voice, you don’t know. Cobb doesn’t say anything for a minute. 

“I was right askin’ what exactly?” He is careful recently not to come to conclusions about anything that has to do with you, including what you might mean when you say things like he’s right about a situation that’s only been painful for all parties involved, fully aware you must feel like you exist on some gyroscope around him given what the last twelve hours has done both to your relationship and to its future. 

“About him - Boba, I mean. Last night when you stopped me in the hall. You were right.” 

It should make him feel good, but it doesn’t. It may have been weird and unexpected, your arrival with a man he’s never met and your refusal to explain fully what’s going on, and it was, so normally he’d feel somewhat victorious in his ability to foresee the disaster headed your way like his being right would bring you any closer, but all he feels now is contrite, and remorseful that he hadn’t been wrong; as a result he remains quiet as if waiting for you to continue, not sure if he should prompt you into explaining or be patient while you gain enough courage on your own to keep going. 

“I feel like I owe you an apology. It was good that you got defensive and asked questions. Things...they just happened so quick. He’d have died if it weren’t for me and I’d probably be dead if it weren’t for him and I thought that it somehow made us...I don’t know, different? I guess? Connected?” 

That word again. You wish you could grind it into nothing and brush it away out of existence. All of these bonds, all of these links to dead people and to lost, destroyed planets, and not one of them has ever ended well for you. You’re sure you’d have been better off never knowing of the word or its meaning at all. It would have saved you immeasurable amounts of heartbreak. 

The sound of hammering and the quiet crunch of your footsteps fills the lapses in your speech as you walk with Cobb down the path to the repair shop. A woman is joining pieces of metal together near the porch. The flash of her welding equipment is nothing against the sun in the sand. Boba is nowhere in sight. “But I was being stupid. He doesn’t know me and I don’t know him and it isn’t his fault that I made assumptions, it just- it hurts, you know? It hurts and I guess it took something like this for me to get it straight.” 

A lesson you should have learned a long time ago, but never have. For all your wondering, you could never figure out why the inhabitants of this world could be so callus. It turns out that the world is bigger and more complicated than you know and that each step you could take in beginning to learn it would only be like treading choppy waters hoping you’ll be one of the lucky ones fortunate enough to find dry land. It was only a matter of time before it was your turn to discover that you aren’t and never have been. 

Cobb keeps his voice low and urgent, is quick to try to reel you back in before you harden yourself completely because this isn’t like you. “You have a good heart, kid. That’s rare on any planet, but it’s especially lacking on this one. It’s gonna hurt when other people don’t have the same capacity for carin’ as you do.” 

You wish that were true and that you could say Boba is some heartless monster of a man who took advantage of your kindness like the rest of them, but he isn’t. He hasn’t ever neighbored being someone you’d consider in such a way. Even now, having hurt your feelings and wounded your pride, his motives in leaving you in Mos Pelgo only extend marginally into his own self-interest and remain largely in part by his altruistic desire to keep you safe; aware that bringing you along would only endanger your life. A man who didn’t desire to keep you out of harm’s way wouldn’t have bothered with helping you, let alone have taken the time to explain why he no longer can. He respects you. Still does. Somehow that’s managed to be an issue and make all of this that much worse.  

“The problem is that I think he does...he wouldn’t have helped me with the farm and getting Patch here if he didn’t. I just thought he cared the same way I do - did. I found out I was wrong.” You’ve stopped crying. Still, you wipe your eyes with the back of your hand out of habit. The small stand is coming into view and you don’t want to look a mess - or maybe you do to garner some pity for your droid, you don’t know. “Anyway, I just thought I’d tell you that. It wasn’t right of me to spring this all on you and expect you to be okay with it, so I’m sorry. About all of it. About the armor and the mess I seem to keep making.” 

It’s strange you almost don’t know how to speak to him - each sentence sounding stilted and artificially deliberate, like you’re trying to maintain a matter-of-fact pretense to disguise that you aren’t sure where you lie with him anymore. Almost as in keeping things pragmatic, you’ll reduce the risk of losing him, too. 

The Sheriff only nods. 

“I appreciate it, but you know you don’t have to apologize for a thing. I wasn’t just blowin’ hot air out of my nose when I told you that if you ever needed somethin’ to come find me. But...you still haven’t said what happened. Between you and him...why you ended up comin’ down here in the first place. It’s made helpin’ you harder.” 

“And you still haven’t told me how you ended up with the armor. Or that you stole it from someone else.” You volly back, unnecessarily sharp. You hadn’t realized how quickly the beskar would become a point of contention between you two. You recognize your misplaced animosity and immediately soften, remorseful. There’s no reason for there to be bad blood between you and Cobb. He hadn’t known. You won’t let Boba ruin the one good thing you have left. 

“I didn’t steal anythin.’ You didn’t ask. Neither did he.” Cobb reminds, not ungentle yet adjacent to something that might be irritation. It must feel weird to be walking around without it on. He’s getting some looks. Surely they saw the bounty hunter step outside clad in the Sheriff’s armor and are in the process of talking among themselves about it speculating, but they otherwise remain in the thick of rebuilding. It’ll come up in the next town hall meeting though, you’re sure of it. Those that had been in the cantina during the exchange are sure to have the most to say.

“He hasn’t told me a lot.” You start quietly. “Actually, I’m positive he’s told me as little as possible. You know about as much as I do except that he doesn’t care for eggs.” What good that anecdote is proving to be in that it’s pointless knowing it at all. “I never worked up the courage to ask what he was doing before the sarlacc got him or how he survived, then with the farm getting attacked and losing Patch and coming here it all just...it didn’t seem to matter. He made it clear that it’s none of my business, anyway.” 

The Marshal is mute for a long moment. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he might be dropping the topic entirely since you can’t tell him anything new, but you can tell from the way he rubs his hand over his mouth that he’s got something to say and just isn’t sure he wants to say it. 

You roll your lips between your teeth, then. “What…?”

“It sounds to me like he’s hiding something.” 

His accusation immediately puts you on the defensive. You try not to let it embarrass you this time. “Like what?” 

“I don’t know.” Cobb admits. “But you don’t go through all that with a person and stay quiet about what brought you to ‘em. There’s somethin’ he doesn’t want you finding out.” 

“Or maybe we’ve only known each other four days.” Your attention remains on walking, but it is evident from the way your shoulders stiffen you don’t like what you’ve heard. 

Your intense desire to protect Boba is proving to be a double edged sword. With every sharp comment, a reminder that he’s leaving you here arrives to instantly abridge it. You can’t keep making excuses as if saying them will make them true and explain why after nursing him back to health, Boba hasn’t bothered giving you a modicum of information you didn’t have to prod at him for first. The tattoos. His father’s name. All brought up by you. Yet you can’t seem to keep yourself from doing it. 

Cobb doesn’t have to say anything for you to know that you shouldn’t have said that. He stops you in front of the shop’s beat-up front counter - a rusted, dirty thing facing the street breached by a wall full of random parts - the wild-eyed and shrewd mechanic missing, taking the moment before the technician appears from somewhere in the back to place his hands on your shoulder and speak to you seriously. “Think about it. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but he might be doin’ you a favor.” 

Before you can say anything, he’s turning towards the shop owner who’s just shuffled into sight; each drag of the owner’s feet creating a sort of whooshing sound against the sandstone flooring of his tiny lean-to, clearly in no rush to greet his would-be customers. You aren’t disappointed to be rid of the conversation. It would be wise to ask him what exactly he means, but this is something else to focus on rather than the elusive background of a man you wish you could hate and the wedge it's driving between you and one of your only friends. 

The technician’s hands are gnarled and covered in grease and do not inspire the hope you thought they would upon seeing him. Far less familiar with him than you are the other townsfolk, Cobb had done the talking while you sat with Boba and had gone over the map. He looks at you both now from underneath eyebrows withered and heavy with age. “Returning for the droid?” 

“Yes.” You say immediately, gaze passing behind him and into the store as if you’d be able to see Patch behind such a chaotic assemblage of vaporator components and tools. “How is he? Was the damage too extensive? Can I look at him myself?” 

“Full of questions, this one is…” He declares, the comment clearly directed to Cobb who merely smiles, but it isn’t nearly half as friendly or polite as he was probably hoping it would come across. You shoot him a silent look of startled disbelief. 

“I think you should answer them, then.” 

The old man nods once, then a second and third time at the disapproval in the tone of his leader, muttering to himself only to finally look at you. 

“The robot is fine.” 

Oh, thank the Maker. 

That’s all you needed to hear, yet he continues speaking. 

“Troublesome little droid. Beeped at me until I threatened to tinker with his main processing unit and remove his speech apparatus. I had to replace the right photoreceptor and upgrade the wheels. The fissure in his shielding was easy enough to repair. I must admit, you kept him in better shape than I would have expected. After a good clean and a coat of fresh paint, I left him to charge. So to answer your question: he’s fine, if not traumatized by the experience.” 

The ancient mechanic grumbles about the details and payment as he wipes his hands on an equally dirty rag - ones you were sure to have been too clunky and graceless to have done any good that have saved the thing you care about most, but you’ve stopped listening to the specifics of his annoyance, bouncing slightly on your toes. 

Cobb’s amusement goes unnoticed too as you fight to curb the eagerness in your voice. “When can I see him?” 

“You can take him now. I have little interest in keeping him for myself. He’ll be as glad to be rid of me as I am of him.” He dismisses with a wave, punching numbers into a small hand held device built into the scarred counter. 

The Marshall starts to fish credits out of the satchel on his hip. He gestures inside with his chin. “Go. I’ll take care of this and meet you back at the cantina. We’ll discuss the long term and what we’re doin’ next after you’ve got your friend.” 

- 

Patch hasn’t stopped talking. 

“It isn’t my fault that you woke up to a scary man in your face. He was fixing you.” 

A series of heated beeps you’re indescribably glad to hear. You have yet to set him down, which might be a secondary cause to his endless chatter - new wheels are an exciting upgrade and he wants to try them out - but you are reluctant to let him be anywhere other than as near to you as he can possibly get; wary of cloaked sinkholes in the sand or other insecure structures that might come crashing down. 

“I couldn’t be there because I was helping Boba. We’re in Mos Pelgo. We came here last night.” 

The suns are brighter as you step outside again. The morning stars higher up in the sky than they were forty five minutes ago. It’s no wonder the mechanic is constantly scrunching his face; the inside of the shop was about as dark as he could get away with without being unable to see at all. Only a handful of bloggin oil lamps and a large, meter tall spotlight guided you to the room Patch was being held. The rest was just guessing. The toes of your boots had come in contact with random objects more than once, sending something light and hollow clattering somewhere in the darkness and nearly incapacitating you, earning a sharp shout from the man still up front. 

Which is why with your eyes still adjusting, your expression pinched into a squint, you don’t see Boba  coming. 

You collide with his chest hard enough for the impact to cause a forcible exhale from your lungs and kick into gear the instinct to tuck Patch away from the blow; your free hand flying out in a pitiful attempt to help you find your balance before you stumble backwards and onto your ass.

Boba apprehends you neatly by your elbow and left shoulder and it isn’t that he keeps you from falling that catches you off guard, it’s how quickly he lets go. His hands return to his belt once he’s sure that you're no longer in danger of cracking your head, like he doesn’t want to touch you more than he absolutely must; the movement brief and direct. If it were anything besides that, it’s impossible to tell. His form is unreadable beneath the newly acquired beskar. You can’t decipher at all what he must be thinking. 

“Careful.” The helmet has changed his voice. It hasn’t made it different. He still sounds like himself, but more detached - distanced and ominous. If you had never met the man beneath it or known the tenderness he’s capable of, you’d be frightened. Part of you still might be anyway. He stands, faceless and ruthless and far more imposing than before, looking at you like he normally would except this time all you can think of is what he might be keeping from you instead of optimistically wondering if he mirrors your feelings for him. You shove away the thoughtless reminder having bloomed from your conversation with Cobb quickly, but have trouble finding a replacement for it. 

You don’t know what to say to him, surely looking at him in some undignified and gaping manner and can only adjust the robot in your arms so that he’s more comfortable to carry in want of doing anything else, unable to tell if he truly disapproved of your inattention or if his warning was in teasing. You're at least more prepared, theoretically, for an exchange with him than you were earlier in the bar and in your room a few hours earlier. And you resolve suddenly to appear and speak composedly, lest you risk him discovering how awful he’s made you feel. Fortunately, he speaks before you do. 

“I am glad to see that your friend still lives.” 

Nodding dumbly, you agree. “Yeah, me too. He, uh, he got new wheels.” You lift Patch to show Boba. Patch swivels them back and forth, whistling. 

Boba chuckles. You’re not astonished by his politeness so much as you are that he’s choosing to continue engaging with you at all. He could have just as easily kept walking. Somehow he didn’t and still hasn’t and you haven’t either. That makes you nervous - fearful that he’s sticking around to work up to this big, final blow that’ll make his departure that much worse; news like he won’t be returning at all. Which, admittedly, is probably what’s implied by his leaving full stop. Uncovering any reason he’d have to return to Freetown after this is over would be a surprise. Still, the sound balloons your lungs and you have to hold your breath to keep from inhaling too much and too suddenly. 

“And a coat of fresh paint.” He adds, gesturing with his gloved pointer finger to the droid’s framework freshly made shiny and uniform with baby blue varnish. 

“And a coat of fresh paint.” You echo, looking at Patch as if you're just noticing because it's easier to play stupid than having to make guesswork as to where his eyes are lingering behind the dark t-shape visor, and whether or not his gaze is soft and reassuring or neutral and impassive. 

You keep talking. 

“I didn’t think you’d be back so soon.” 

“My part of the agreement is not yet finished. There are many things we must do to prepare for this dragon.” He answers like it's obvious. 

“Right, yeah. I know that. I just-” 

“Was expecting I’d be gone longer?” 

“Yeah.” 

It gets quiet for a moment. You draw a line in the sand with your boot. “Where did you go?” 

Boba sighs, his exhale weary and fuzzy as it passes through the helm. “The Sand People know these lands better than anyone. If we are to have a chance at defeating this beast, we must enlist their help. That’s where I went.” 

“The Raiders? But didn’t-” 

“Yes.” 

Cloaked figures murmuring to each other in the dark. You aren’t their biggest fan. Often, you’ve caught one or two of them trying to rip random pieces off your vaporators - cowardly and unwilling to venture more than three at a time to scavenge; but otherwise you tend to leave each other alone, only aware of their proximity when you see the silhouette of a single rider on the back of a bantha or the soft glow of their torches miles away in the horizon. You’ve heard the stories, though, through Cobb and the others. You also know by the way Boba reacted the day you found him that he doesn’t have a pleasant history with them either. If anyone has reason to be put out by their presence, it’s him, yet he seems in fine enough spirits. 

“I doubt they reacted well to seeing you.” 

“They reacted as I had expected. Once I explained I was not there to kill them, they were willing to cooperate.” 

“In exchange for what?” 

“Nothing. The dragon threatens them as it does Freetown. They benefit from killing it the same as we do. They are angry at Vanth - they say he steals their water and kills their people, but they will help us as partners.” 

“Oh.” You doubt it went as smoothly as he’s made it seem, but are hesitant to press for the actual details. 

“That’s good, then. Although, I’m not sure how well everyone else will take it. The last time the Sand People raided, we were devastated. People went hungry. The aquifers went down by half. They aren’t going to be eager to work with the same group that’s responsible for harming themselves and their family members. It’ll mean trouble trying to get them on board, but I suppose that’s something Cobb should handle.” 

“Speak to them with us. They’d listen to reason when it’s coming from you.” 

“I’m pretty sure they’d sooner see me isolated on the farm, never to return than they would listen to what I have to say. I did bring to town the man who took their Mayor’s armor from off his back. They see me and think trouble. Which, by the way, I’m sure they're more than eager to air their grievances about after watching you almost get in a shoot-out with the man they look to for protection.” 

“Forget the armor. You have made connections with them haven’t you? In a way that Vanth’s status as their Sheriff has not allowed?” 

Although they don’t place Cobb on an altar and worship him as a god, there is a certain level of respect that shuts mouths. No one is afraid to share their thoughts or air their grievances, but it's different discussing everyday issues with a peer than it would be having the same conversation with a liberator. Those discussions are always more intimate, more private, more telling. Hushed susurrations in the motel lobby with Nilima. Ceramic mugs of steaming cassius tea held between cold palms slowly being warmed. Standing in the darkened street semi-illuminated by the catina lights, the distant mooing of banthas somewhere far off, a girl only a few years younger than you confiding in you her desire to leave while stuck with nowhere to go. 

They trust you, finally. Still, you hesitate. Many of them are easily swayed. That might not be a good thing. 

“Sure, but I’m not - I wouldn’t even know what to say. You and Cobb are the ones with a plan.” 

“You only need to convince them.”

“That’s not gonna be easy.” 

“That is why I know you can do it.” 

The lightness his complement sets in your stomach is counteracted, then suffocated by the dread of having to subject yourself to the entire town when all you’d really like to do is lay down. 

“And if that doesn’t work?” 

“We will make it work.” 

“Stars, Boba…” 

Surely he must know that the breadth of his assertions has lost some of their weight after the disaster with your cousin. This whole conversation has been like a practice in improvising feelings that directly contradict the ones that are actually conjuring a storm in the center of your chest. It isn’t so much about this working or not working as it is the way he talks to you, like he has no idea how hard it is for you to face him, while he goes on either not caring or doing an excellent job of hiding his regard behind the mask. You had anticipated, at least, some awkward tension from his side, yet he appears perfectly content in doing everything as he normally would except for touching you. 

Burned hands covered in scar tissue. You might as well be torn from the same cloth of what had branded him the first time with the way he keeps his hands to himself. 

It’s painful but bearable. At least for now. 

“The Marshal will be gathering his people inside the bar tomorrow night. What you choose to do is for you to decide, but it is my hope that you’ll listen. Perhaps Patch here will ease their irritation.” 

Mentioned, Patch chirps - eager to have attention brought to his new upgrades. You aren’t as excited. 

“Yeah,” you murmur softly. “We’ll see.” 

- 

It is late. The sky is flat and black. It would be unfortunate that if, on top of everything that’s happened, a sandstorm is looming, but the Maker is rarely on your side. The unsteady breeze swipes granules against the building; calm, careful, waiting. 

Sleep has never come easy, but the events of the last week have culminated into an insomnia you can’t shake; despite every trick you’ve been taught to invite drowsiness done and then done a second time. You can’t stop thinking about what you’ll say tomorrow, if you’ll say anything at all - what Boba and Cobb will say as well, and if the people will listen. They are stubborn, set in their old ways. It will be a challenge persuading them to overcome their conceptions and biases about the Raiders, despite how crucial it is that for this to work effectively, they must coordinate. If you can get Nilima to agree, she might be able to influence the others. However, there’s no way of telling until it happens. For now, it’s all you can do to cross your fingers and wish for the best. 

Across the room, nothing more than a dim light and a fuzzy shadow, your droid sleeps plugged into the wall. A big day he’s had and you’re more than relieved to have him back - not just because you love him, but also because his presence provides some normalcy to a situation that just - isn’t. A reminder and comfort of things that had been. 

If only it were that easy, you think as you rise unsteadily to your feet from the bed, you wouldn’t be tired a day in your life. 

You blink to focus your vision and navigate the small room with the precision of someone unfamiliar with their surroundings, keeping quiet and biting your tongue as your knees collide with the - albeit sparse - furnishings on your way to the door. 

It glides open. You step out and it glides shut. You stare at the entry panel across from you, aware that somewhere behind it Boba resides doing something; sleeping, probably, or maybe staring up at the ceiling like you had been. He had liked the closeness, you’re sure of it. He’d never have let you freely touch him otherwise. Yet he withdraws and justifies it by insisting it’s for your safety. 

Wondering is daunting. Circular thoughts that start anywhere and go everywhere only to end nowhere are wastes of time. You can not, however, understand whether wanting more than an explanation from him would be too much to ask or if what happened yesterday and the night before were just extenuating circumstances. The consequence of high tensions with very little to resolve it aside from the consolations you could give each other; balms to wounds still aching. 

You turn away. 

His door opens. 

You stop. Look over your shoulder. Boba stands in the threshold previously blocked by durasteel and chrome. He looks back. No armor this time. No mask. 

Neither of you speak for a moment. Then. 

“Why are you awake?” 

You debate the merits of answering honestly then decide against it. “I think my body’s gotten used to the kitchen table.” 

“It is important that you rest.” 

“I could say the same for you.” 

“You could.” He agrees. 

“Why are you awake?” 

His body has gotten used to your bed. 

His body has gotten used to you. 

“It is rare that I sleep well.” 

You nod. You don’t have to meditate on why. Another moment’s silence. Then gently. “I know about the nightmares.” 

“They’re nothing.” 

“They bother you, keep you awake. That’s not nothing.” 

“It isn’t anything you should concern yourself with.” 

“You know, you’re kind of a hypocrite.” 

“I’m allowed to be.” 

“I don’t think that’s fair. You can’t just say you’re allowed to be and then suddenly you are.” 

“Is that not how hypocrisy works?” 

“I-” Momentarily tongue-tied by your frustration, you look down at the thin carpeting. “I was only trying to say that I get it...and that I’m here for you, even though you likely don’t want me to be. 

“The first night you had one.” You go on to continue. “I don’t think you remember, though, which is...good, I guess - for both of us. You were so hurt and - and in so much agony that I-” 

You hadn’t realized how extensive an effect that had on you until having to say it outloud. “The salve I gave you should help. I can give you my mother’s recipe before you leave if you’d like. Just promise that you’ll use it when you have to-” 

The end of your sentence diminishes into nothing when you look back up and notice how close he’s gotten. 

Inches from you. Close enough that if you inhaled, you’d touch him. 

“What are you doing?” You feel, suddenly, like a reed cut free from its roots. 

“I am nearing the age my father had been when he died.” 

You furrow your brows in confusion. Why is he saying this? 

“How old was he when he died?” 

“Forty-four.” 

“How old are you?” 

“I am forty-one.” 

“I don’t...I don’t think I understand.” 

Is he trying to imply that you’re too young for him, too naive and someone he doesn’t want. If so, you don’t get why he’s bringing this up now, or why he hasn’t before. Or why he’s invading your space breathing you in allowing himself to be breathed in, too. 

“What I mean to say is that I have lived a long life. In that time I have seen more death than I now care to remember; many of them brought about by my own doing. And soon, I will have lived longer than the only other person that mattered to me. 

You’re no longer a reed. You’re a moth. Huddling him for warmth, waiting to catch fire and burn. 

“I’m sorry…” 

You don’t actually want to say that, yet you say it anyway because it feels like the safest thing. Safer than trying to grasp at his point. Safer than focusing on the purposeful use of his language, that tiny and often overlooked adverb implying that there’s someone or there had been someone once who had been lucky enough to take up a place in his heart. 

You are sorry. You’re sorry about the sarlacc. You’re sorry about the burns. You’re sorry that his father has died and that he’s alone. You’re sorry for a lot that isn’t your fault, yet feels like your responsibility to fix. 

You’re sorry and he’s taking a step forward. 

Part of you hopes he won’t do anything, fearing that if by moving he’ll accelerate whatever is about to happen and make it go too fast. It’ll end before you want it to even start. For the moment, all you want is to remain on the periphery, to keep on towing that line between one outcome and the other in this small island of stillness; afloat as if on the muteness of a river at dusk, and it is all you can do to restrain yourself from beginning him to stay where he is - if only to keep your metaphorical boat hugged to the shore and well hidden. 

He doesn’t stop. You don’t tell him to. 

Silence inside. Outside, the wind gusts so harsh that it pushes through the cracks in the permacrete. His hands find your waist. You’re already shivering before he kisses you. 

He is delicate in his passion and you are slow to respond - not reluctant, but careful, as if by allowing yourself to fully indulge you’d bubble over with the things brimming inside you that you’d been desperately trying to squash. Your heart becomes a fist. The spaces where its fingers don’t quite touch its palm pockets that hold prayer. Its fingernails digging into the skin alight with bleeding and sorrowful longing. 

His affection and rhythm flows into your throat. 

It doesn’t last nearly as long as you’d have liked. 

You open your eyes, stare at him and try not to frown. “Why…” 

“You deserve a proper goodbye.” 

“But you aren’t...you aren’t leaving until tomorrow.” 

“Would it have been better if I had waited?” 

No. Maker, how badly you wish you could say yes. 

Boba kisses the top of your head. You close your eyes again. “Get some rest. We’ve got a dragon to kill.” 

By the time you’ve opened them again, he’s back in his room.

[samstree]

Four times Geralt wakes up his bard with kisses + one time the favor is returned (2/5)

previous: [1]

(geraskier, sleeping beauty curse, love confession, 630 words)

-------------------------------

2.

“…I wish you could enjoy the irony, Butcher, but you will be too dead for it,” the mage says while casting an intricate curse with his hands. A flash of light comes towards Geralt before he pirouettes and deflects it with his steel sword.

Behind him comes a pained gasp. Geralt turns around in shock to see Jaskier in the distance, stumbling and collapsing onto the ground, his eyes wide and panicked.

“G’ralt –” he whimpers in pain before passing out.

No. The bard was not supposed to come this close. Damn him.

Geralt clenches his jaw and rushes toward Jaskier, kneels next to him and cradles his head in his lap. The bard turns pale and lifeless in a matter of seconds, his head slacked and lolling to the side. Luckily, a faint heartbeat is still there, slowing down almost like he is falling into a deep slumber.

Whatever the curse is, it’s powerful.

“I thought your business was with me.” Geralt grits his teeth. “The bard has nothing to do with it.”

“Regardless,” the mage spits venom, “The lesson stays true. You Witchers are heartless beings, and I am only doing the Continent a favor by ridding it of you. Or at least, revealing your true nature.”

“Lift your spell right this second, or I’ll show you my true nature.”

Geralt’s patience is running out, and the state of Jaskier’s coma is churning up something ugly from the dark corners of Geralt’s mind.

The mage only smirks. “I couldn’t even if I wanted to. You see Witcher, I cast a spell that can only be lifted by what you will never have. It can only be broken by love.”

Geralt’s heart skips a beat.

“I would have sent you into eternal sleep. You see, Butcher, there isn’t a single person on this Continent who can ever love you. No one could ever wake you with the kiss of true love. You’d be as good as dead. Now –” The mage carries on. “No matter, the bard bears your fate, but the people will still see what you are. A monster who hasn’t an ounce of love in his heart, the real curse for whoever dares walk beside you.”

Clarity settles like a heavy blanket. The kiss of true love.

Oh.

Geralt moves his gaze from the mage’s smug face to the sleeping bard in his arms. Jaskier’s eyelashes cast long shades on his pale cheeks, his breathing even and barely there.

Relief washes over Geralt.

He’s been pondering about the phrase for a few months now, but hasn’t told Jaskier, fearing the bard not being ready, fearing that his confession might scare him away.

But Geralt loves him. He loves Jaskier with all his heart, and now he is most grateful for it.

The mage is going to be so mad.

Geralt leans down to kiss those soft lips, hoping to pour his feelings through the gentle contact. Tentatively, he pulls back and opens his eyes. A sliver of doubt still makes him wonder that it’s not going to work – that his heart is not enough – but the most beautiful sky blue meets him in answer.

It seems this Witcher is capable of it after all.

“Did you just…” Jaskier asks weakly, “I feel like a princess from a fairytale.”

A chuckle rumbles out of Geralt’s chest.

“I love you.” Geralt whispers into Jaskier’s ear, with a reverence that surprises even himself. “But let me deal with something else first.”

Jaskier squeezes his arm in reassurance before standing up with the help of Geralt’s steady hold. Warmth flows in the blue of Jaskier’s eyes when he answers.

“I love you too, my ridiculous Witcher.”

With a contented smile, Geralt picks up his sword and turns to face the now horrified mage.

[chaeryybomb]

should you fight them?

nct dream edition

listen y'all it's 4am and I can't sleep so here I am with another crack reaction fic because y'all loved the nct dream rooftop fights one

I would say all the dreamies have fighting experience because they're always together

so you gotta have some basic knowledge too

here's some times

when making a fist, never place your thumb in between your fingers. make sure your thumb is like resting about your index finger

if you're going in for a kick, your stance has to be wide. the basic stance for a kick is one leg forward and the other at the back

slightly bend both legs before kicking, makes it easier for you to kick and you'll feel less stiff

the elbow is one of the strongest bones so use it to your advantage to elbow someone

if you're trying to turn while kicking, you have to move your entire upperbody as well. from waist down

oh and make sure to flatten out your feet. kick with your top part of your feet, never kick with your toes. you're going to break if you do

anyways leggo

huang renjun

honestly if you have the confidence to fight THE huang renjun

go for it ig

but there's a 98% chance of you losing

the 2% chance is him suing you so either way it's a lose-lose

b u t theoretically, if you DO fight renjun

honestly you would need some height advantage

and I'm not talking like,,, tall height

no I mean you have to be shorter than this man

mans is so used to fighting people taller than him, I strongly believe he will be left confused fighting someone smaller than him

like you have to be under 165cm

that's where you get the advantage to kick him in the knees and mans goes down

but like kick em from behind the knees so so 1. you don't hurt your feet, 2. his knees would ✨ b u c k l e ✨

in all honesty you also have to be fast and agile

like you need to dodge his hands because if you get CAUGHT

he will STRANGLE YOU

PLACES YOU IN A C H O K E H O L D

but yeah the only way you can beat him is you have to be shorter than him AND you need whatever confidence you pulled out from your ass fhshdhshd

10/10 would not recommend to fight unless you're looking for a death wish

no but seriously if given the chance don't fight huang renjun

mans may look SOFT but he's lit rally the devil fhshdhs

lee jeno

no

just no

don't even tHINK ABOUT IT

you're not fighting lee jeno and that's it

why??

WHY???

WHY DO YOU THINK

HE'S LITERALLY THE MOST BUILT IN NCT DREAM BESIDES JAEMIN

MANS CAN PLUMMET YOU

the only reason he won't do it is because he's niCE

AND WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO FIGHT JENO

he's gonna be S A D

"w-why would you want fight me, y/n?"

(╯︵╰,)

you're gonna make jeno sad and renjun will come for your ass so honestly you'd be fighting renjun

so yeah don't fight jeno

just don't okay you heartless monster

lee haechan

in all honesty

you can fight haechan

there's a 50/50 chance of you winning

hyuck's not weak but he isn't strong either so—

he's gonna spend most of the time taunting you so you just need to sucker punch him to shut up—

you need to act i n t i m i d a t i n g

scare him a bit ya know

you definitely would need speed because he's fast

he's a runner

and you're going to need to chase him

it's a game of cat and mouse basically

pros of fighting haechan: you get to bragging rights if you win

cons of fighting haechan: 127 hyungs will be there in a millisecond to fight you and that's a whole another post

but if you win, he's gonna be so salty about it and is gonna start calling you out fhshdhhs

he might just hate you for it so being hated by haechan is not worth fighting him

na jaemin

jaemin would let you win

he can beat your ass but he'll let you win because he loves you

he's just that sweet okay

like I said, jaemin's the second most built in nct dream

so fighting him would be a stupid decision

but no mans will accept your challenge and let you win

he will literally f a l l when you touch him

you don't even have to punch him

one touch and he goes down

"aRGH YOU WIN Y/N, I LOST!!!"

dhshdhs he makes his losing really dramatic

but he thinks it's worth it because you get to be proud and happy!

so yeah "fighting" jaemin is a good idea if you need a boost of serotonin

beware he's gonna be pouty the entire time so—

but oh boy if you make him like mad mad

bye you won't live to see another day

there's two sides of jaemin, loud jaemin and quiet jaemin

and quiet jaemin is s c a r y

basically fight loud jaemin and not quiet jaemin

zhong chenle

HE'S NOT GOING TO EVEN GIVE YOU A CHANCE

AND HE WILL S U E YOU

chenle has the money and he will use it against you fhshdhs

unless you have the money too or yk have a lawyer family member

then the whole fight will be in court fhshfh

BUT BUT BUT

let's say you do fight him

you would win tbh

i don't think chenle's much a fighter

he's like haechan, he likes to tease and taunt people instead

so honestly you have the higher ups of winning

I recommend fighting with earplugs in because he's going to be screaming most of the time so yeah

but I really really don't recommend fighting chenle

chenle can look scary too

and plus he can and will definitely sue you so—

park jisung

now why would you want to fight this baby boy?????

HUH?????

like I would fight you for wanting to fight jisung

unlike jeno, you can at least still sorta fight him

BUT JISUNG IS OFF LIMITS

ALL 22 HYUNGS WILL COME AFTER YOU

A L L O F T H E M

boy may be tall asf but he's defenseless

he's just a giant lanky baby

why do you want to fight him???

okay but you would win if you do BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT

actually it kinda is since the post is should you fight the dreamies— wAIT NO

DHSHD POINT IS JUST DONT FIGHT JISUNG OKAY

like really go fight jaemin instead

he's the safest bet

but no jisung is OFF LIMITS

OFF LIMITS I SAY

and so what if you win

all you get is to brag about beating park jisung but then you're gonna live in guilt forever because you fought park jisung

[missskzbiased]

Shoot Your Shot

Genre: Fluff, Romance, Oneshot, Confession au, Implied High School Au, Friends To Lovers Au, Drabble (Kind of lol)

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin X GN! Reader (Actually, I didn’t use any pronouns) 

Word Count: ~1,9K

Notes: It’s my first request! LOL I was just saving the prompts but I really liked your choices, anonnie~ So I decided to give it a shot. I hope you like it! I’m kinda nervous since I never did something like this before haha. I’m sorry for the delay, lots of stuff happened here T^T 

Prompt 17+30

                                                  /////

    You gasped, covering your mouth as you widen your eyes.

     The first thing to register into your brain was the muffled sound followed by two distinct noises. One of them was the basketball bouncing on the ground, its thud slowly lowering until you could only hear it rolling away from both of you. The second one was Hyunjin’s body falling with a loud bang to the floor, his whining coming right after as he shot his hands to his face.

    You swiveled your head around ─ too startled to actually move in the first place ─, eyes roaming around the court just to find it completely desert, just like it was when you first arrived. As much as you loved Hyunjin’s company, you should know that your neighbor and classmate was the last person in the world who should watch your practice on the court next to your house.

    “It hurts…” He sobbed, voice muffled by his hands. You hoped it was out of embarrassment and reflex, not deep pain and a broken nose. Either way, his whining was enough for you to finally jog his way, worry painting your eyes.

    You squatted next to him, hand gently holding his wrist so you could move his hands out of the way and check how his face looked. Dear God, please don’t let Hyunjin’s face be damaged, you thought to yourself, hoping you didn’t break his nose. How would you confess to him knowing you just smashed his face? Would he ever forgive you if you broke his nose? What if his admirers wanted to break yours out of revenge?!

    “Let me take a look” You pleaded when he didn’t move his hands. He finally gave in under your soft tone and gentle brush on his skin. He rested his hand over his chest, tilting his head to look at you as your hands wandered to his cheeks. How the hell could he be so pretty? His hair was sprawled over the floor, his headband preventing the strands to get on his eyes.

    Speaking of which… What beautiful eyes.

    He looked at you with squinted tearing eyes from the pain, and even his twisted face wasn’t enough to take away the twinkle of his eyes… He was too perfect. You lost yourself on his face for a split of a second, studying the sheen left there by his sweating. His flushed state was kind of cute if you were being honest, but what part of Hwang Hyunjin wasn’t cute? You stared at his cheeks ─one of them way redder than the other─ before you let your attention fall to his lips.

    Unconsciously, your thumb grazed his lower lip, gaze focusing there a little bit too long before snapping to his nose, inspecting it thoroughly. As the captain of the basketball team, you were more than able to recognize a broken nose, and as much as you felt your head on the verge of exploding ─ face burning as you realized how his eyes glinted amused, clearly aware of your slip up ─, you could tell his nose was just fine.

   “It’s nothing” You stated relieved, letting go of his face as you sighed, shoulders relaxing immediately. You made mention to get up but his free hand snapped to your wrist, holding you as he clenched his fist above his chest, an exaggerated pained expression washing over his face.

   “All my friends told me you’d break my heart!” He uttered, turning his head to the side and furrowing his brows in a comic way that made you chuckle, nudging his side playfully “I didn’t think you’d try to break my nose too… What have I ever done to you, you heartless monster?” He chanted, hand leaving his chest to lay in his forehead as if he was a damsel in distress.

   “Stop it!” You giggled, pushing him lightly “Your nose is just fine! Stop being a Drama Llama!” You smiled at him, noticing how he tried to peek at your reaction, lips quirking slightly as he saw your fond gaze over him. He gasped dramatically, raising his torso to sit on the floor, shooting you an offended look that made you chortle.

   “What about my heart then?!” He cried, pulling your hand to his chest. He let his hand there over yours, pushing it against his chest for you to feel his heartbeat; eyes diving into yours as his dramatical self dissolved into a serious look. He hesitated for a moment, and you could feel how his heart raced right under your palm, making you blush. Maybe he liked you too? “Y-You startled me to death!” He stammered, laughing awkwardly right after.

   “Oh… Yeah” You couldn’t hide your disappointment, chuckling just to be polite “I thought you’d have better reflexes as a dancer” You pointed out, and he snorted, letting go of your hand before lowering his head just a bit, biting his lips and letting his gaze wandering around aimlessly.

   You missed the warmth of his hold.

   “Yeah…” He trailed off, sounding too insecure for his usual playful self “I think you were just too quick… When I least expected I just fell” He raised his eyes to meet yours again, hands fisting the ground as he waited for you to say something. You could swear his face was flushed but maybe it was just because he was hit by a basketball not too long ago? You were sure that your face was flushed, though, and you weren’t hit by any balls today.

    “If I didn’t know you better, I’d say you were trying to flirt with me…” You mumbled, feeling your heart race in your chest, chuckling to shrug it off. You averted your eyes, afraid of his answer. Maybe he was just joking? Maybe he didn’t even notice he was making you dare to think he might like you back? Maybe he –

    “Well, I think we should go on a date so you can get to know me better… ‘Cause I am trying to flirt with you” He grinned, enjoying your flabbergasted features. You let your mouth fell agape, eyes unfocused as you tried to make sense of his words. Did he just ask you out?!

    “Are you… Are you asking me on a date?” Your voice came out strangled, and he didn’t even try to fight back his giggles, hands trailing to your face. He caressed your cheek gently, eyes softening as he looked at you fondly. You were sure his hands could feel how warm your cheeks were, so you tried to move your face away from his grip, embarrassed.

   “I’d like to be your boyfriend, to be honest” He said coyly, watching you trying to voice something but failing. You let your mouth open and close more times than you could count, totally taken aback by his confession “I want to go to your match and watch you scoring and pointing at me… Blowing me a kiss and saying you did it for me…” He added, blushing. He watched for your reaction but you couldn’t say anything, overwhelmed by the sudden realization that he did like you back “Say something, you monster! I’m pouring my heart out for you here!” He whined jokingly, and this time you reacted, chortling.

    “You could just ask if you wanted me to score some points for you…” He missed your teasing tone, surprised by your conclusion, waving his hands eagerly as he floundered to retort you.

   “W-What?! N-No! I meant I –“ You chuckled, pecking his cheek, interrupting him “Ouch!” He blurted, hand shooting to his swollen face. You arched your brows surprised, forgetting for a moment you had just hit him with a ball. You reached for his cheek, caressing it carefully, eyes focused on the redness of his skin and he lost himself in your eyes, holding your hand over his face.

   “Sorry, I forgot it” You smiled sheepishly, looking into his eyes. He didn’t seem too concerned about his pain, eyes twinkling as he looked at yours “Don’t look at me like this…” You lowered your head, averting your eyes, but his hand was quick to take your chin between his fingers, raising it back to look at him.

    “Like this?” He inquired, lips quirking up just a little bit, amused “What do you mean?” His tone was teasing, and you almost poked his cheek out of shame. You felt your lips quivering before you could respond, gulping down as his eyes seemed to drag yours to him.

    “Like you want to kiss me” You answered under your breath but you knew he had heard you when his small smile turned into a sly grin.

    “But I do…” He spoke slowly, teasing tone hanging in the air for a while. He leaned closer, lips hovering over yours but never touching them. He stared at your lips for a few seconds before resuming to your eyes, and you felt your breath being knocked out of your lungs. He was stunning “Maybe if you kiss me I can look at you normally again?” He suggested playfully.

    Oh, good Lord, why couldn’t you just smack him?

    You shut your eyes firmly, closing the gap between your lips to peck his lips. You broke away from him, eyeing him shyly, which made him hold back a giggle, looking at you in pure adoration. He cupped your cheeks, squishing them before placing a peck on your lips, chuckling as you yelped. He kissed the tip of your nose, then each cheek ─ just under your eyes─, and then your forehead, breaking apart to study you, the softest smile on his lips.

    “You’re still looking…” You muttered, observing his eyes glued to your lips. He raised them to look into your eyes again, thumb grazing over your cheek. You looked at him through half-lidded eyes, inviting him to kiss you again.

    “If I didn’t know you better, I’d say you were trying to flirt with me…” He mocked, and you pushed him lightly, giggling.

   “It looks like we don’t even know each other even after living 10 years right beside one another, hm?” You laughed, cupping his cheeks “Lucky you, I’m free this Saturday” You sang, beaming as you saw his eyes sparkling.

   “It’s a date?!” He asked excitedly, and you couldn’t help but laugh at his eagerness. You nodded, happy to see his eyes molding into two crescents, caressing his cheek before finally closing the gap between you, kissing him slowly. He melted into the kiss, just like you, and you couldn’t recall one time you felt so light in your whole life.

   It felt like you were a balloon and suddenly someone let you go, letting your feelings flying all over the place, hitting everywhere and making a ruckus inside your guts. You heard it was supposed to feel like butterflies, but it didn’t feel fluttering at all. It was like someone just grabbed your stomach and revolved it over and over again to the point it was too much to take and your heart just burst inside you, creating a turbulent melody to your first kiss with Hyunjin.

   You broke away, letting your eyes closed, reticent of letting all of this go away.

   “Earth to Y/N?” He joked, and you puffed his face, opening your eyes slowly “Hi…” He smiled at you, faces inches away from yours.

    “Hi…” You said back, returning his smile “So can we get back to practice or should we just keep getting to know each other?” You asked slyly, watching as he blushed, astonished.

    “Y-Your call?” He gulped down. You got up, dusting off your clothes and extending your hand to help him out. He took it gratefully, standing up, watching as you let go of his hand to go and pick up the ball long forgotten.

    “Okay, If I get it in I’m done for the day... If I don’t, we’ll have plenty of time to get to know each other” You suggested, bouncing the ball twice before looking at him with a smile.

     “Well... You’re the cap! Shoot your shot” He chuckled. You smirked, walking his way as you bounced the ball, kissing his swollen cheek before grabbing the ball, positioning yourself to hoop.

     “Oh, I sure will” You chuckled, looking at him before shooting. 

[fandom-imagines-stories]

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

Gif credit @rainbow-motors

Dean Winchester x Reader 

Words: 1518

Summary: Alone on a hunt for the holidays, 19-year-old Dean calls up his childhood friend. 

Notes: I’ve been obsessed with Young Jensen content and I found this gif (Thanks to the creator!) and I really wanted to write something for a younger Dean. Call me lazy, but I didn’t want to include the hunt itself in this one. I thought writing the moments before and after would be cute, so enjoy! (Bit of a mess, but I hope you like it)

Want more Supernatural? Find it HERE

-

“Hey Sammy, it’s me,” Dean started the voicemail grimly. It was the third one he’d left for his younger brother, “I know you’re not happy with me and that’s why you won’t take my calls, but dammit man, I’ll be back as soon as I can. It’s just another hunt Sam. I’ll be back before you can say Hanukkah.” He thought for a moment before finishing. “Merry Christmas, Sammy.” 

He ended the message and tossed his phone on the motel bed with a huff. He knew Sam was pissed about him going on a hunt alone, especially over Christmas, but he didn’t think the silent treatment was going to last this long. Dad gave him an order and he wasn’t going to let him down. 

Dean sat down in front of a pile of books and sighed. He hated the research parts of hunts. He just wanted to kill the son-of-a-bitch. Unfortunately, he wasn’t totally sure what this particular son-of-a-bitch was. Over the course of seven years, 15 kids have gone missing right around Christmas time. No notes, no bodies, nothing. If his dad had any theories, he certainly hadn’t shared them. So research time it was. 

About three hours and two illegally obtained beers later, he had a couple of theories ready. It didn’t seem like a spirit or vampires, and without heartless bodies, it wasn’t a werewolf. Since the disappearances always happened around the holidays, he figured that the creature might have Pagan roots. Either that, or it could be a Grinch of a witch somewhere. Whatever it was, it was sure putting a dent in his holiday. 

Maybe that’s why he dialed the number. Sure, his dad told him he needed to do this on his own, but if it really was some Pagan entity, he wasn’t really sure he could take it on by himself- not that he would ever tell his father that. As far as his dad was concerned, Dean could handle anything that the dark world threw at him. But right now, looking at the Christmas lights through the frosty motel window, he wanted a friend. 

“Jack Frost, can’t say I was expecting a call from you.” Your amused voice made Dean smile. You had the phone wedged between your shoulder and your ear as you painted your toenails Christmas Tree green. Just because you were a badass hunter didn’t mean you couldn’t be festive. 

“Hey Y/N,” Dean chuckled, pushing away from the book covered table and cracking open another beer, “how’ve things been on your side of the Midwest?” 

“Oh, you know, vengeful spirit here, vampire there, nothing too exciting.” You twisted the top back on the polish and hopped off the bathroom counter, being careful when you walked so you didn’t get any polish on the carpet. “Mom’s been off with the twins, trying to give them a little bit of a normal Christmas up in Oregon.” 

“Why aren’t you with them?” Dean wondered. Your family wasn’t like his family. You and your mom somehow made it work. You weren’t usually separated, at least not for long. 

“I had a hunch that someone else was going to be needing me this year.” Dean let out a long, frustrated groan.

“Sam called you, didn’t he?” 

“Sammy boy was worried that you’d have a lonely Christmas so he asked me to hang around in case you needed some help.” You shrugged.

“Hang around? What do you mean hang around?” 

“Come to room 114 and find out Dean-o.” With a smirk, you hung up and waited at the foot of your bed, flipping through channels on the television. You settled on a channel that was playing The Year Without a Santa Claus. 

When you heard the knock on the door you walked on your heels to open it. Dean gave you an annoyed glare, but you could tell he was happy to see you. He barreled passed you, nearly knocking you off balance. 

“Watch the feet!” You whined, pointing at your newly painted toes. Dean rolled his eyes. 

“You painted your toenails?” He scoffed. “What are you? 13?” 

“Don’t be a Scrooge, they look nice.” You had long been able to handle Dean’s snarkiness. 

Your mother had run into John Winchester back in 1990 on a spirit case. Dean was 11, you were 10 and Sam and the twins were about 7. While your parents took down the ghost, you and Dean had to babysit. While he was obnoxious at first, the two of you got along pretty well. You bonded over being the oldest siblings, constantly having to look out for your kid brothers, worrying whether or not your parents would come home, remembering the parent that you’d lost, for Dean, it was his mother to a demon, for you it was your dad to a werewolf. 

After that, John and your mom would sometimes meet up if only to have you and Dean look after the younger kids. You even ended up going to the same high school for a while. Dean was probably the closest thing you had in your monster-hunting world to a best friend. And you, not that he would ever say it, were the closest thing he’d ever had to a crush. 

“I think I may have a lead on what we’re looking for here.” You informed, tossing him your journal. Astonished, Dean scanned the page. 

“How did you-”

“I’ve been researching gods in my free time.” 

“You are such a nerd.” Dean scoffed, taking a closer look at something you wrote. 

“Yeah well this nerd has saved your ass more than a fair share so shut it, Winchester.” You smirked, snatching back your journal. “Based on the case files of the missing kids, I have an idea of who we might be dealing with. Gryla is from Icelandic folklore and she, uh, eats naughty children.” 

“And here I complained about the coal.” Dean grimaced. 

“If we don’t figure out where she is, these kids become Christmas dinner.” While you dove into more research, Dean looked over your shoulder at the TV. 

“Are those puppets?” 

You scrambled to turn off the TV, but Dean stole the remote. 

“It’s a Christmas classic.” You reasoned, feeling yourself turn red. “I watched it with the twins all the time when we were kids.” 

“I think it’s adorable.” He leaned ever so closer to you without realizing it. Like a magnet pulling you together, you found yourself inching closer and closer until-

“Are we going to hunt this thing or not?” You suddenly exclaimed, backing away quickly. He was just kidding around. Dean was always pretty flirty. It was just part of your friendship. He didn’t feel that way about you- the way you felt about him. 

-

You burst through your motel room door, half carrying Dean in with you. In a panicked rush, you sat him down on the bed and scrambled to find your first aid kit. 

“At least we beat the damn thing, right?” Dean smirked before wincing at the pain. His wound wasn’t life threatening, but it sure hurt like a bitch. 

“This is going to hurt.” You warned, turning on the radio to drown out any pained sounds that Dean made. As you cleaned the wound, his eyes were locked on you. You tried not to notice. It was the pain that was making him look at you like that. You covered the wound with a bandage and put a fair distance between the two of you. You hoped he couldn’t see how much you were shaking. 

“Everything okay?” Dean asked. 

“Yeah, yeah everything’s fine, Dean.” You lied, laughing nervously. “I just got kinda freaked out when I saw her attack you.” 

“You sure that’s all that’s bothering you?”

“I thought you were going to die, Dean, I think that’s a sufficient reason to be a little jittery.” Dean got up from his place on the bed and walked towards you. 

“We’ve known each other for how long, Y/N? I can tell when you’re not telling me the whole story.” 

You ignored him, electing to listen to the Christmas music coming from the radio instead. It was one of your favorites. You mouthed the words to yourself. 

“Through the years, we all will be together. If the fates allow.” 

“Fate hasn’t exactly been our friend.” You scoffed. 

“Huh?”

“The song. It says ‘if the fates allow’. Fate doesn’t seem to like us this year.” 

“I don’t believe in all that.” Dean said, shaking his head. “And if I did, it looks like ‘fate’ has had it out for me for the past fifteen years.” 

“Fair enough.” You crossed your arms over your chest, watching snow start to fall outside the window. Neither of you said anything. You both just watched the white flecks tumble down to the earth. You turned around and found him standing right behind you. It didn’t startle you. It felt like he was meant to be close to you. You breathed in slowly before whispering. “Merry Christmas Dean.” 

“Merry Christmas.” 

You didn’t need any mistletoe for what came next.