#you’ve had us tied here for hours and you don't even know what we are??

[envy-of-the-apple]

The Monster You Know

Dark!Gojo Satoru x reader

Synopsis: For your own safety, the strongest sorcerer of today kidnaps you.

Word Count: 6.9k

(Warnings: implied masturbation, implied nsfw, implied noncon recording, death of a minor character.....im pretty sure i missed a warning so lemme know any pls)

Instead of waking up in a bed, you find yourself on the floor.

It's not a comfortable spot to sleep in. The carpet is clean, but it's odd because you don't have this type of carpet in your room. Actually, this isn't your room at all. 

But the panic doesn't really set in until you realize your arms are bound. 

You don't notice him until he speaks. You're too busy yanking on the metal, pulling your hand as hard as you could. The cuffs don't even budge. 

"If you keep yanking your arms like that, you might break 'em." 

He's tall, rivaling the door he just walked through. He looks a couple of years older than you, but his white hair can't be natural, not at his age. His blue eyes are lax. The worst part is how relaxed he looks. He has an eased posture and a pretty smile. He's amused, watching you like you’re a pesky mouse trapped in a bucket. 

You don’t know him. You’re stuck in an unfamiliar room, chained to the floor, and you don’t know this man. 

Escape isn’t possible. So you resort to the next best thing: you plead. 

“Who are you?” Your voice is light and wavers on every syllable. “Where-Where am I? Did you bring me here? Please don’t-“

”You always this talkative in the morning?” He dodges your question with a lax grin. “Anyway, uh, sorry about this-“ he gestures to your tied-up form “-I would've used a talisman, but those won’t work on you for obvious reasons. The handcuffs aren’t too tight, are they?” 

He steps closer, and you scream. It’s shrill, filled with a type of fear that makes your blood freeze because you don’t know this man, you don’t know where you are, and he’s getting closer. 

“Okay okay, I get it!” He manages to say over your pleas for help, but he steps back, and it’s enough to quiet your fear. “Obviously, you need some more time alone, so I’m gonna give you a couple more hours. Feel free to take a mint!” He cheerily points to the nightstand. 

He leaves as quickly as he enters. The door shuts but doesn’t lock. You’d be relieved if you weren’t still incapacitated. 

You look around the room. Nothing of value, nothing that you could reach and grab. Apart from a chair, the only other pieces of furniture were a heavy-looking bed and a bolted-down nightstand. Your kidnapper was certainly meticulous. 

The restraints have just enough slack for you to lean over. You peer at the nightstand. A plastic bowl, too flimsy to be made into a weapon. It contains wrapped-white candies. You gingerly pick one up. 

They’re sugar-free. 

He returns to the mints scattered all over the floor. 

“Okay.” He notes, gracefully stepping over the mess. “Clearly, you aren’t a fan of peppermint. 'you a wintergreen kinda’ person?” 

You don’t look at him. You’ve been in the same position you had been in for hours, sitting curled on the floor. By then, your desperation was starting to show through. 

“Please just let me go.” You mutter, your voice so low, it’s a miracle he can hear you. “I don’t have any money. I have nothing to offer.”

”Well, that’s good because I don’t want your money.” He says. “I know this looks pretty bad, but this is for your sake more than mine.”

You look at him just as he squats down to your height. You shift away. he smiles.

”Do you know what sorcerer's are?” 

You blink. 

“It’s fine if you don’t; we all start somewhere, right? A sorcerer is someone who can manipulate cursed energy. I’m a sorcerer! I don’t wanna brag too much, but I’m pretty good at it.” 

He laughs like he’s telling a joke, and you suddenly realize that you were kidnapped by someone who believes he’s a wizard. 

“Guess you’re still lost, huh? How about I just show you instead?” He points to an ironed-out shirt hanging on a rack. You follow his finger. 

He didn't move. There was no machinery. The shirt just crinkled by itself before it dropped to the floor. 

You gape. The man grins. 

"Pretty amazing, right? That's cursed energy, or, my power if you wanna be less technical." 

"Cursed energy." You whisper, a repetition of his words rather than any actual understanding. He beams regardless. 

"Yeah! Well, it's a little more complicated than that, but let's just start with the basics for now. Baby steps." 

Your dread doesn't fade. Earlier, you feared what a man could do to you, tied and defenseless. Now, you wondered what this man wouldn't do to you. 

"Okay, then....why?" You warily ask him. "Why tell me any of this? What's the point?" 

"An excellent question!" He commends you, as though he were your teacher and not your jailor. "See, cursed energy is a bit complicated, but it's extremely effective. In almost every case, it's the solution. Except for you." 

You shrink back. 

"What-what does that mean?"

His grin turns feline. He's enjoying this; seeing you shake, waver beneath his eyes. 

"Exactly what I said: you aren't affected by cursed energy. A sorcerer could use their technique on you, and there won't even be a scratch on your body. You're basically the Eraserhead of the Jujutsu World." 

You stare at him. He hums, drumming his fingers on his thigh. 

"I'm not great at explanations. How about we just have a hands-on experience?" 

He extends his hands. A purple orb crackles to life, slowly gaining mass. 

"Not too big," he says, though it's clear he isn't speaking to you, "don't wanna wreck the room." 

He adjusts his angle so it's facing you. Your eyes widen, and the desperation to wrangle yourself out of the handcuffs grows stronger. 

"Wait, stop!" You pleads fall on deaf ears. "Okay okay. I believe you. I believe you-" He flicks his fingers. You close your eyes just before impact. 

You expected something. Electricity, a shock. Pain. Your body being eviscerated in milliseconds. 

Nothing. Not even a gust of wind. 

When your eyes open, he's grinning at you. 

"See?" He says, "Not even a scratch." 

He's right. Your clothes aren't even rustled, but the evidence is there. The carpet below you is shaved and cleaned off. And the wall closest to you has cracks on it.

You look back up at him. 

"I said I believed you." 

He shrugs. "Doesn't hurt to make sure we're on the same page." His smile is starting to look less scary and more annoying. 

Your mind still struggles to keep up with all the information you've been given. The typhoon of anxiety is coursing through you. 

"So, then....why this?" You mention to the handcuffs. 

"Just a little confirmation you won't go crazy and destroy the place." He supplies happily. "If jujutsu doesn't work on you, then bindings and talismans definitely won't do a thing. Looking back, abduction probably wasn't the greatest idea in the world. I would've figured something else out, but time wasn't on our side in this case. Especially if we wanted you alive." 

You pale at that. He notices. 

"What, you thought I'd be the only person who noticed you? You're an anomaly. In our world, that's dangerous. Also, the bounty on your head is a pretty nice incentive for people to get the job done." 

"A bounty?"

He grins, and the number he gives makes your mouth hang open. 

"Yup, pretty crazy, right? Anyway, until everything settles down, you and I are roomies!" He claps. "Isn't that exciting!?" 

You glance at him. Then, in the room. Then, at your cuffs. Everything was going so fast. The only constant was him. 

"So, I'm not really a prisoner?" You ask. "I could just...leave, right?" 

"Sure you could. If you hear all that and still wanna go, I won't stop you. Promise." He nods. "But you'd be dead as soon as you step out of the apartment." 

It's not a threat. It's a promise. And not from him. That makes it worse. 

This is insane. All of this is insane; who'd believe any of it? But his powers....that can't be faked. As well as everything that he told you. Why would he lie? What reason could he have to deceive you? 

"Okay," you say hesitantly, "just one more thing." 

The man leans in. 

"What's your name?" 

He smiles. 

Becoming Gojo's roommate was an easy transition. 

You’ve always been someone who goes with the flow. Becoming someone's consenting captive isn't a struggle once you get used to it. A few days in and you and your 'captor' have fallen into an easy rhythm. It's easy to grow trusting of him, especially when there are others who can vouch for him. 

"You should be arrested." Ieiri mumbles, checking your wrists. 

"What? I can't believe you're upset with me." Gojo responds though he doesn't sound very panicked. "I was desperate!" 

Ieiri shakes her head, continuing wrapping your wrists. Amid your panic during the first few hours in Gojo's apartment, you managed to sprain your wrists, trying to yank yourself out of the handcuffs. You wince when she presses on your bruised skin. 

"Sorry," she says, voice flat. You smile anyway. 

Ieiri was also a sorcerer, but she had a different technique. Instead of Gojo's destruction, hers revolved around healing. You've never really seen it in action ("My technique won't work on you; even then, it's a sprained wrist. You'll live."), but it sounded pretty powerful. 

"I'm not upset." Ieiri continues. "But I'm surprised you're going along with all this." That sentence is directed at you. 

You shrug while trying to keep still for her. "He was pretty convincing." 

Ieiri raises a brow, before ultimately deciding she doesn't care. 

"Again, I'm very sorry about all this." Ijichi pipes up. Ever since he entered Gojo's flat, he's been doing nothing but begging for your forgiveness for Gojo's abrupt actions. Apologetic, but not very shocked. You're assuming this isn't the first time Gojo has done something like this. 

Gojo's allies were very different from each other, you ultimately decided. 

“We thought we’d have more time to approach you,” he continues with a nervous smile, “we never expected the clans to move so quickly.” 

“Clans?” You ask, “What clans?” 

Ijichi gives Gojo a look. Gojo looks away, whistling. Eventually, Ijichi’s shoulders drop. 

“Some minor clans with dwindling jujitsu sorcerers.” He gives. “And then the bounty happened and well…” he trails off. 

You nod. “So, when will everything go back to normal?”

Gojo grins. Ieiri sighs. It’s Ijichi who gives the most concrete response. 

You look at the three of them. “Or will things ever go back to normal?”

”It’s hard to say,” Ijichi says, “news travels fast in the jujutsu world, but it’s not improbable. Miyashiro will let us know eventually.” 

"Miyashiro?” 

To answer your question, Ijichi pulls out his phone. You stare at a picture of yourself. But you know you’ve never been in that restaurant before. 

“It’s his technique.” Ijichi tells you. “Flesh manipulation. For the time being, Miyashiro will pose as you and can hopefully air out any potential bounty hunters. He’s the perfect man for the job.” 

You nod, a bit skeptical. “Isn’t this a bit dangerous? Aren’t people trying to kill me?” 

Ijichi tucks away his phone. “Miyashiro is one our best. He'll be fine.” He assures. 

Satisfied with your answers, you nod. Ieiri pulls away after she finishes wrapping your hand. Gojo claps his hands together. 

“See, roomie? You’re in great hands!” He chirps. You nod, if only to seem compliant. 

Apart from Gojo himself, Ieiri and Ijichi are the only ones who know about your predicament, his most trusted people. The rest of the world is unaware that there's someone posing as you, nor that you've gone into hiding. Not your friends. Not even your family. ("It's for the best," Ijichi explained when you voiced your worries, "but we promise, once the bounty is down, we'll return you back to your life. It'll be like nothing ever happened.").

Settling in barely takes a week. Gojo's nice enough to lend you his room, more than happy to set up in the living room. Despite how you two 'met', he's quickly proven to be a nice guy. 

Nice. Just nice. 

To be honest, you don't know all that much about Gojo. He's letting you stay in his home, but you don't see him all that much. Gojo is gone pretty much all day. Sometimes, he's gone for days on end. The apartment feels more like yours than his. 

"I'm the strongest." He told you when you asked. You don't know what he means by that, so you didn't pry. 

Despite the awkwardness, you don't mind the distant relationship. The man probably has his day packed with hunting down demons and this school he talked about. 

The change doesn't happen until two weeks after you move in. 

You weren't allowed to have a phone, nor any internet access, so you mostly spent your time doing hobbies. You've always wanted to learn to crochet, and now you finally had time to actually learn. Drawing also took some hours out of your day. And eventually, you moved onto cooking. 

Ijichi was more than happy to grab you the grocery items when you asked. When you insisted on paying him back, he declined profusely. He was actually the one who organized getting your things and really moving you in. You have another thing you owe these people. 

Cooking was a steep learning curve. Before, you'd only made simple sandwiches and curries, so the food starting out wasn't the best. But you enjoyed the journey more, rather than the end result. Pretty soon, you became pretty good at it. 

Gojo wasn't home often these days, so you jump when the front door clicks open. He takes off that blindfold he's always wearing, blinking a couple times before his blue gaze settles on you in the kitchen. 

"What's all this?" He cocks his head. He isn't smiling. 

Oh no. You remembered getting permission to use his kitchen, but maybe he hadn't expected you to go this far? The kitchen is a mess. There's flour everywhere. You still hadn't washed the cutting board, nor the knives. 

"I'm sorry," you say, "I-I can clean up and-" 

He waves his hand. "It's fine. I'm not mad, I just..." He drifts off. 

You suddenly have a feeling that you might've misread this entire situation. 

"Would you like some?" You ask. "I think I made too much." 

"I could eat," he says.

You smile. 

A few moments later, the two of you are settled on the table. Gojo's never been so quiet before. In the short time you've known him, he's always been boisterous and playful. Now, he's silent. Staring at the food. 

You hold your breath when he takes his first bite. 

"It's good." He says, his mouth full. It's cute. "Really, really good. Damn." 

You laugh out of nerves. 

"You think so? I'm glad! It was my first time trying out this recipe and I wasn't sure if it'd turn out well and..." you're rambling, you know that. You can't help yourself. 

"No, it's good. Real good," he says. It's silent again, but not as uncomfortable this time. The only thing you hear is the clanking of silverware and the hum of the lights. Outside the window, the city lights twinkle. 

You're on your last bite when he speaks again. 

"'been a while since I've had a homecooked meal." He starts with a slight laugh. "Kinda' forgot what it's like." 

You think of the fridge. How it was only ever stacked with protein shakes and instant meals. Gojo was a sorcerer. The strongest. You think you get what that means now. 

"I wouldn't mind doing this more often," you say. 

He looks at you with the prettiest blue you've ever seen. The color of a bright cloudless sky. 

"I think I'd like that." 

Who ever said the phrase 'the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach' was onto something. Your friendship with Gojo bloomed after that night. On the seldom nights he came home, dinner was made and sitting on the table. It took a few days for the two of you to warm up enough to talk to each other. Once Gojo got going, it was a lot harder to shut him up. He talked about his school, his work as a teacher for other jujutsu sorcerers. You liked the way he talked about his students. Nothing but pride and affection .

On the nights he didn't come home, you'd save the leftovers in the fridge. They were usually gone by the morning. 

He was around a lot more after that night. Not that you minded, it was his house. You just didn't get a few things about him. For example, that blindfold of his. Why wear it when it was clear he couldn't see with it on? 

You decide to bring it up the third time he nearly runs you over.

"It's part of my technique." He explains. "The six eyes. They're basically cursed energy x-rays. The blindfold just limits their strength." 

You were lounged on the sofa watching TV while he was plopped right next to you. He's switched his blindfold for his glasses. 

"Oh," you say when it clicks, "and since I block people's abilities you..." 

"Yup! Can't see you at all!" Gojo happily fills in. "It doesn't help that you're so quiet. Maybe I should put a bell on you." 

You laugh, but it doesn't sound like he was joking. 

"What's it like?" You ask, turning to him, "Seeing the way, you see? What-what do you see?"

"Everything." Gojo shrugs. 

You frown. "That's not very descriptive." 

He laughs. "Here, wanna try?" He takes off his glasses, handing them over. "These things are real popular with the ladies." 

He's avoiding the question, but you don't bother chasing him for it. Instead, you grab the lenses, pulling them over your eyes. You expect to see the secrets of the universe. Instead, you see nothing but darkness. Though, that might be the point.  

"Everything, hm?" You ask, when you take them off. "That sounds exhausting." 

He takes them back with a grin. "It is! My eyes hurt so so much! You should pity me and make matcha tiramisu." 

You laugh, drawing back. "That's what this is about? To guilt trip me into making dessert for you?" 

"Did it work?" 

You think for a moment.

"Get me the ingredients, and I'll see." 

He cheers but doesn't fully answer your question until the episode ends when you've bid him goodnight and are about to return to the bedroom. 

"You're blurry from far away." 

When you look at him, his glasses are gone, tucked under his collar. It's night, but the sky still stares down at you. His usual smile is gone, stretched into a line you can't place. 

"I can see down to molecules, atoms. Not you." 

You look at him, his eyes. The beautiful curse they are. 

You force yourself to take the first step. Then another. Then another. When you're right in front of him, when he's towering over you, you open to your mouth. 

"What do you see, Gojo?" 

"Everything." He honestly replies. 

Everything. Not just cursed energy. Down to cells, molecules, atoms. You can't fathom how much that is, the essence of everything. What's that like? Being able to see the universe so much that it hurts? So much so that it makes him want to wear a blindfold and never see anything again. 

But you're blurry. Gojo can't see you the way he sees others. 

You reach your hands up slowly like you're approaching a wild animal. In some ways, maybe that's what Gojo is: unpredictable, able to wield the power of space—power that's useless against you. 

You cover his eyes. He doesn't stop you. 

"What do you see, Satoru?" 

He doesn't speak, and you're afraid he's forgotten how. 

"Nothing." Quiet, barely more than a whisper.

He slouches ever so slightly, leaning into your hands like some weight's been lifted. It makes you smile. 

When you try to pull your hands away, his wrap around your wrist, keeping you there. So you stay—for as long as he wants. 

It starts something of a tradition between the two of you. Not every night, not even most nights, but every so often, Satoru would grow quiet, shift in a particular way. You hoped it was therapeutic for him, a break rather than a glimpse of what could have been. You hoped you were helping. 

And, if you were torturing him, hopefully, you won't be for long. 

"How much longer do you think I have to do this?" You ask. 

He hums, clearly not paying attention. You two were in the kitchen, making some sweet he saw trending on the internet. Well, you were doing all the work. Satoru kept trying to steal the batter. 

"You know. Sleeping under your roof, eating all your food, stealing you bed." You urge, while whisking. 

"You're acting like I've been keeping you in the attic, roomie." Satoru pouts. "C'mon, I haven't been that bad, have I?" 

"I'm asking for your sake rather than mine," you tell him. "I'm sure you'll be thrilled to have your house back, and your bed. When will everything settle down?" 

His blindfold is on, as it usually is. To help him out, you've taken to wearing squeaky slippers around the house. He'd offered to buy you one of those cat collars with bells. You declined. 

He's looking in your direction. You know he can't see you, but you can still feel his eyes on you. It's a strange feeling. 

"There's talks of taking down the bounty," Satoru finally says, losing his playful tone, "just rumors, nothing concrete. Worst comes to worst, we'll have to relocate you somewhere overseas." 

Yeah, you were worried about that. Leaving everything behind, your home, your friends, your family, because your life was in danger. You hoped it wouldn't have to come to that. 

"We have a couple of options, though," Satoru says, "negotiations, for one." 

You perk up at that. "Negotiations?" You ask. 

He nods. "Right now, you're under my protection. Unofficially. I could pull some strings, get those old geezers at the academy to take you in as some special assistant." 

You tilt your head. "Like at the school that you teach, right?" 

He nods. "We have a case like yours attending the school, too. I think you and him would get along." 

"Your ability could be pretty useful to us. You might even get out in the field every so often." Satoru continues. "A special technique like that would be wasted down here." 

Special. He's said that before. You can't remember when, but you know he's right. You're an anomaly, but you can use your abilities for good. But could you really do that? Risk your life every day? Lose pieces of yourself like that?

"I don't really feel special," you say, "I don't want to be special either." You glance at him. "Is that a bad thing?" 

Even blindfolded, somehow, his eyes find yours. 

"No," he says, no judgment in his voice, "it just makes you human." 

Relief. You can feel it sinking through your veins. Part of you feels guilty. Satoru is right; you could do a lot. But you...you don't want to end up like him. 

That makes you feel even worse, but then you catch something in his tone. 

"You sound like you're not very human," you say back. You're teasing, but it falls flat. 

He hums. It's not quite the response you were looking for. It takes a second for him to start up again. 

"When I was younger, people used to call me creepy." 

You stare at him. 

"What?." 

He grins, but it's not his usual one. 

"It's true." He shrugs. "Mostly, it was 'cause of my eyes. They called them unnerving. Monstrous. My folks were always a creative bunch." He says it so casually, but you can hear the bite on his voice. It's phrased as a joke, but it isn't.

You put down your whisk, giving him your full attention. 

"That's not true," you respond, "you know that, right? You aren't a monster. Monsters aren't as kind as you are." 

"Oh?" He tilts his head. "Maybe I'm using my kindness as a lure to trap you. Guess you just fell for it, roomie. 'thought you were smarter than that." You roll your eyes. 

"Okay, fine, I yield. You're a monster. But out of all the monsters in the world, I'd pick you." 

For a moment, there's silence in the kitchen. Then- 

"So cheesy!" Satoru laughs. He reaches over, roughly pinching your cheek. "Who knew you could say such cute things, roomie." 

You slap his hands away, now extremely annoyed. 

"Nevermind. I take it back," you retort. "I'd run away as far as I could from you." 

"Good, you should," he replies. "I won't stop you." 

You scoff. 

"Maybe that's why everyone thought you were creepy." You go back to your whisking. "It's not your eyes, you just say a lot of ominous shit." 

Despite how peaceful it is, making desert, cooking, and acting domestic, it can't last forever. The world was still hunting for you, and it had no problems reminding you of that. 

One night, you wake up to the sounds of hushed talking. 

It's coming from the living room. Multiple voices. Quiet but urgent. You're used to the noise. Satoru has this habit of blasting terrible soap operas at 2 am. You don't think that man sleeps. Over time, you've gotten used to at least one disturbance. 

But this feels different. It's enough to rub the sleep out of your eyes, making you pad over to the hall. 

They hear you before they see you. Satoru's apartment has creaky floorboards. Ijichi tugs on the collar of his shirt nervously. Ieiri just looks away. Satoru is leaning back against the couch, legs crossed. He's frowning. That's how you know something isn't right. 

"Is everything okay?" You ask anyway. 

Ijichi gives a tight grin. 

"Everything's fine." He's quick to console. "We-we were just-" 

"Stop." Satoru immediately cuts in. He's wearing his blindfold. You can't tell what he's thinking. 

"We're not hiding it. Everyone involved should know." 

Ijichi deflates. You think Ieiri sneers. 

Satoru beckons you closer with long fingers. You step forward. They're sitting around a computer. You peek at the screen.

Instantly, you wish you hadn't. 

There were pictures of you. Dead. Your body parts were strewn across the floor. Your hands were broken in every other way. Your legs were in pieces. Your head snapped clean off, blood oozing from your appendages like you were just a packet of liquid. One of your eyes was missing from its socket. The other was crushed. But it wasn't you, it was- 

"Miyashiro. At least, what's left of him." Satoru gives.  

The doppelganger, the guy who was covering for you. He was supposed to be one of their best; what happened to him? 

What was going to happen to you? 

They're talking again. At least, you think they are. Their words are muffled, filtered through water. You can't make out what anyone is saying. Your heart's beating too fast. It's pounding through your ears. You can only stare at the picture, what was left of him. Someone's touching you. A hand on your back. 

"Roomie, hey," Satoru's voice comes.

The pounding stops. You look up at him. 

Angelic. It's the only word you could think of. His snow-white hair was pretty, falling elegantly down his face. He'd taken his blindfold off. Blue eyes, sparkling, cleansing. Purifying, like the Ganges river. 

How could anyone think a beautiful sight like this was monstrous? 

He calls your name, your real name, and you break. 

You cling to him, wrapping your arms around his waist. And you're sobbing, tears of everything flowing down your face. 

Hands, hesitant, unsure, rest on your back. And then Satoru's holding you as tightly as he can.

He's warm. It's all you can think as you shake in his hold. 

He's warm. 

"I won't have to worry about that if I just gave in, hm?" You ask. 

It was a couple of days later from your episode. Satoru had convinced you to give one of his soap operas a shot. On-screen, a woman slapped her cheating husband. 

Satoru was lounging beside you, feet propped up on the coffee table. You want to tell him off, but it's his house. 

"If you went to the school, you mean?" He asks. "Probably. You'd be a lot freer. Won't have to sit in a cramped apartment all day. 'sides, jujutsu tech is always on the lookout for fresh talent. The higher-ups would be ecstatic to have someone like you under their thumb." 

"But I'd have to become a sorcerer." You say the unspoken. 

Gojo nods. "Yeah, you would." 

And you don't want that. To face curses, to face death every day. You know you can't handle that. You aren't strong, like Satoru. 

"I'm sorry," you say. 

He laughs. "For what?" 

You shrug as the on-screen couple makes up again. "For being...a coward, I guess."

He thinks for a moment. 

"It's not about bravery," he says in the end, "being a sorcerer is just...that. A sorcerer. It's a job. A title. Only a special few can do it. The crazy ones." 

His tone gets a bit playful. 

"No offense, roomie, but I don't think you got enough crazy in you." 

"That's a compliment, actually." You correct. He ignores you. 

"'sides, I like you staying here." Satoru declares, stretching his arms out on the couch. "Who'd feed me? It'd be horrible to go back to ramen again." 

You roll your eyes. "Right. Who else will wake at 2 am because of your whining to make wagashi?" 

"See! You get it!" Satoru grins. You can't force the smile off your face. 

The husband's mistress has entered the set. The wife is confident that her husband will choose her. She's left heartbroken all over again. You don't get how she couldn't see it. The red flags were all there, and still, she was left blindsided. Never saw it coming. She trusts too easily, you decided. 

"Also, I like having you here," Satoru says. 

You glance at him. He's watching the screen. 

"It's...nice." He admits after a bit. "To have company like this. It reminds me of back when I was younger. When the two of us lived in the dorms." 

When he was a student? Who was he talking about? You don't pry. It's clear he isn't talking to you. 

"I'm glad you're here," Satoru says. 

Lightly, you bump shoulders with him. Infinity doesn't stop you. 

"You're a sweet monster." You tell him. 

He gives a secret grin. 

Every once in a while, Gojo peeks into the bedroom while you're sleeping. 

He's subtle about it, doesn't make too much noise. You're a light sleeper, so it takes little to nothing to wake you up. 

He doesn't do anything. He stands there, shuffles here and there, hovering by the foot of the bed. You just pretend to be asleep in those cases, evening out your breaths, closing your eyes. It's always the same. He loiters around for a minute, and then he's shutting the door behind him. 

It's strange, but you try not to think too much of it. He was probably looking for something. It's his room after all. 

It's just...strange. 

You find it when you're looking through his book shelf. 

He doesn't have anything interesting to read. It's mainly just historical novels. You're perusing through one before a photograph falls out of the pages. 

It's tiny, barely larger than your palm. It only takes a second to realize what you're looking at. 

"Found your baby pictures." You gleefully tell Satoru when he comes back. 

"What?" He tilts his head; you wave the photo in front of him. When he tries to take it, you pull back. 

"Tiny Satoru!" You squeal. "Who knew you were once so small? I always thought you were born six feet over." 

It's a simple photograph, a little aged, but still clear. Satoru looks about eight, standing between a man and a woman. His face is eerily blank. He stares with no emotion, not even a smile. He isn't wearing sunglasses or a blindfold. Doll-like blue eyes. You don't feel like you're looking at a child. He's too-

"Are those your parents?" You ask, letting him take the photograph from you. 

"No," he says, "my caretakers." 

Caretakers. Not nannies, or anything else. It felt so clinical. You lean against his shoulder, still staring at the photograph. 

"You look cute." You finally say. When you peak over, a hint of a smile is twitching on his face. "But I totally agree with everyone. You look creepy. Like one of those children from the exorcist. Climbing over the walls." 

"I never grew out of that phase." Satoru ponders. You laugh. 

"What was it like?" You ask. "You said you're from a clan, right?" 

"Exhausting." Satoru groans. "Never a break from training. I should go back and sue my folks for child abuse. I could get millions." 

"I could help you with that." You pipe in. "I've never gone to law school, but I feel like I'd make a great lawyer." 

"I'll keep that in mind." He promises teasingly before his smile fades. 

"But that's the norm for most kids in jujutsu." He sighs. "Gotta' be perfect. Gotta' be the best, right from the beginning. There's a student I know who had a rough start, but she's the best in her class. Her clan didn't care about her potential. Those kids are all scary talented, they just need a bit of nurturing, that's all." 

You stare at him. He catches you. 

"What?" He asks, before his eyes widen. "Do I have a pimple?" 

You shake your head. "For some reason, I feel like that's impossible for you." You tease.

"I'm just admiring you, I think. For being such a kind person." 

"I thought we agreed I was a monster." Satoru points out. 

This again. You roll your eyes. 

"Fine, a good monster." You correct. "A monster, I know." 

"The monster you know." He repeats

You want to ask him why he's so insistent on that. For some reason, you hold your voice. 

Satoru's apartment had two bathrooms. Lately, the one in the bedroom has had some issues. 

It's been awkward lately trying to share the only working bathroom. Satoru and you shower at around the same time, so you've opted to hold back your morning routine a little later. You still manage to catch each other. The amount of times you've accidentally caught him walking around with nothing but a towel around his waist would be too mortifying to admit. 

But, so far, it's working. And you can't complain since you at least have one working bathroom. It's the little things. 

Tonight, you wake up to your bladder urging you to move. And yet, your body still wants to sleep. You check the time. It's nearly 2 in the morning.

It takes a while to pull yourself up, unraveling yourself from the covers before you're trudging out the bedroom. Satoru's apartment is so dark. It's a completely different look compared to daytime. You feel your way with the walls, letting your eyes adjust to the dark. When you peek over at the living room, Satoru isn't there. He must not be coming home tonight. 

The bathroom is shut, but there's a sliver of light bleeding under the door. Fuck, you did not shut the lights off last time. You need to be less careless. 

At first, you think Satoru's hurt. 

He looks hurt. He's hunched over, shaking shoulders, harsh breathing. You can only see his back, but he looks like he's in agony. You're about to step forward, ask what happened, and then you catch a glimpse of what he's clutching. 

Pretty, blue, laced panties. 

Your panties. 

And you're close enough to hear his voice whispering your name. Over and over again. 

"Fuck, fuck, baby, need you, just lemme-just lemme, all mine, all mine-"

He doubles over, tightening his grip on the edge of the sink. Your panties are damp. 

You flinch, and in your moment of panic, you step back. Creaky floorboards. 

Satoru looks up in the mirror. You don't move. 

He takes his time. Placing his phone down. Adjusting his pants, washing his hands. You can only stand there, frozen. Staring. Staring until he's in front of you, looking right back. 

You might have forgiven him if he had fumbled, laughed it off, became bashful. A human reaction. His face is eerily blank. He stares with no emotion, not even a smile. His eyes mirror that photograph. Doll-like, absolutely empty. 

Monstrous. 

Your eyes water. He turns blurry for a second. 

Satoru steps aside. You wordlessly enter the bathroom, shutting the door behind you. You don't bother locking. 

You don't know how long you stay there, quiet, shaking, your mind trying to piece together what you just saw. You stay there for hours. You stay there for seconds. Time stretches on like infinity itself, yet even then, it's too short. 

You're alone with him. It's a thought you never even had until now. You're alone with him.��

Satoru is outside. You don't look at him, staring at the floor, looking at the carpet, counting each strand. You keep your head down when you return to the bedroom. 

He follows. You say nothing. You don't look. You don't look, even when the covers shift and he gets into bed behind you. You don't look, even when there's a hand on your shoulder. You don't look, even when there's a chest pressed against your back. 

You shiver, you shake. You don't look. He says nothing, even when you break down completely. 

You wake up alone the next morning. 

You don't waste a second. You're stumbling through the room, picking up your clothes, packing everything that you need. You're so panicked that you manage to knock over an alarm clock. 

It's habit to reach down and pick it up. Learned politeness to scrutinize it to make sure it isn't broken. 

A black dot stares back at you. 

A camera. 

Horrible memories of last night come back. He was watching something on his phone. 

You feel nauseous, about to give all over the floor. You need to go. You needed to get out of there. 

The apartment is silent, like it always is when Satoru isn't here. You just hadn't noticed how cold it was, lifeless. It makes the pit on your stomach gap. You expect the windows to be bolted shut. They aren't. Sunlight streams through the glass. The front door is unbarred too. 

It's easy to leave. 

You stop anyway. One question. 

Where would you go? 

You can't go back home. Miyashiro's body still haunts you. His soul in your body, torn apart with such hatred and vitriol. Those people were still looking for you. The only reason you were still alive was because Miyashiro took your death bed. 

You'd die if you went back home. 

You can't go to jujutsu tech. You'd be expected to lay down your life, serve a maskless force that pretended to do good. You'd certainly die. Ripped apart by curses. 

You'd be slaughtered if you went to the school.

Every route is treacherous, nearly impossible, full of dangers and unknowns. 

At least, you know what Satoru wants. 

He's made it clear since the beginning. You were just willfully ignorant. Oblivious on purpose. More than happy to ignore the red flags because you knew he was a kind person to his students, ignoring the dichotomy of his actions. 

Two things can be right at once. 

Satoru won't stop you if you run. He told you that himself. You could leave if you wanted, and he won't follow. But every other path is filled with an intangible value, and Satoru is the monster you know. 

Your hand falls away from the doorknob. 

You get started on dinner.

You're still there when Satoru comes back. You say nothing. Neither does he. Dinner is a quiet affair. He doesn't talk about his day, he doesn't talk about his students. When you wash the plates, he's quietly standing behind you. When you get out of the shower, he's waiting outside the bathroom. 

You can't bring yourself to look at him until you get into bed. Your eyes trail up, past his legs, his shoulders, his neck. Looking into Satoru's crystal blue eyes. 

Blank. Numb. Empty. 

You think of the cameras. You think of your stolen underwear. 

You think of how much his eyes must hurt right then. 

You raise one hand out, grasping the sleeve of his shirt. It's barely a tug, but the monster follows like he's weightless, crawling into bed. He's too big to hold properly, but he sinks into your body anyway. His forehead rests against your chest. His eyes close. You don't feel that ice anymore. 

“What do you see, Satoru?” 

“Nothing.” A pause. A stilted breath. 

“Nothing but you.” 

He was right in the end. Satoru is a monster. There's no other word that can describe him. Inhuman, far above humanity itself. But he's the monster you'd pick, every single time.

[snowy-vee]

Academic Rivals [One-Shot]

ellie williams x fem!reader

n/a: this is my first ff and first time writing smut🤷🏾‍♀️ PLEASE JUDGE, I love constructive criticism, also English is not my first language! Any misspelling will be edited if anything, I hope you guys enjoy♡ Also I don't think I will ever write "smut" again

HELP GAZA

You let out a scream that was drowned out by your pillow as you kicked and whimpered like a little girl.

“It’s not fair! Not fair! I was better than her at everything how did she won? I’m a pathetic number two… Mom, why do we have to host this stupid party? I hate this!”

The door to your room was open, and in the doorway, your mother was looking at you as if you were crazy.

“Honey, I already told everyone that I would have a party if you graduated with honours. How would I know that they would make you share them with someone else?”

“And you had to invite Ellie and her friends?”

“It’s called politeness… I don’t care! Wipe away those tears, you should be happy with what you’ve achieved, stop acting like a little girl and get ready, the guests will arrive in no time.”

You looked at yourself in the mirror, seeing all your mask through your eyes. You just had to nod and go prepare a good bath trying to forget in the hot water but how when in happen so recently.

A few hours ago, while you were in class, you were called by the principal to go see him, and you already knew that it was going to be to tell you that you were the student with honours of your promotion. So imagine the surprise when you opened the door and there was someone else.

Ellie fucking Williams. The only student you had competition with, and that irritated you, but even more because it seemed so easy for her. It didn’t matter what the subject matter was; Ellie mastered it quickly, while you had to push yourself a little harder and lose sleep until you understood all the subjects.

The smile you had before you opened the door dropped a little, but the look on your face when the principal said you’d both share the title was funny, at least for Ellie. Once she had dismissed you both from the office, Ellie let out the loudest, most exaggerated laugh befitting a villain.

“It’s not funny! This is inadmissible; it must be a mistake.”

“You’ve heard the old man, there are no mistakes; we tied… I’ll see you tonight at our party.” You’ll never forget her smile and how she looked you up and down before heading out into the hallway.

Going back to the present time, you had already finished cleaning up and could already hear the voice of the guests.

“Your mother says come down now.” The door to your room opened, revealing Ellie leaning against it, “You look good.”

“I’d like to say the same, but you’re wearing jeans,” you said, walking past her and bumping into her shoulder intentionally. What a great night this was going to be.

❀❀❀

The celebration was supposed to end two hours ago, but the adults got along so well that they decided to stay longer. Most of your friends had gone home; only Ellie and her friends Dina and Jesse were still here, but you couldn’t care less since you were in your backyard sitting behind some bushes while drinking the bottle of vodka that you knew your mother wouldn’t miss.

“Here you are,” Ellie said, and you couldn’t help but let out a snort. “Are you okay?”

“Do I look good?”

“For me, you always do,” she said as she sat down next to you, taking the bottle out of your hands and taking a sip. “Fuck, I never thought someone as uptight as you could drink something as strong.”

“Uptight? Wow, I’m sorry, Miss Sunshine. Not everyone has time to fool around, go to every party, do nothing, and still have everything coming handy to them; some of us work hard.”

“I don’t get you; what have I ever done to you? We don’t even talk! You despise me for some school grades? That’s insane,” she chuckled, shaking her head while taking another vodka sip.

“What have you ever done to me?!” This was your final strike: “You just win and win; try to be friends with me as if you pitied me when you don’t even care what you win! You come to class not even knowing what subject you are, and you talk every minute of it, and somehow, you get the highest score,” you snapped.

“And everybody likes you! You are friendly even if you are a dork; nobody gives a fuck about the savage Starlight comics, but there you go talking about it with everyone and you get them to listen to you, but I don’t buy it; I don’t buy your pretty face,your pretty eyes, the way that they shine when you are talking about it, when you laugh so hard that you start crying, how your stupid freckles look so cute when you move your stup-¡hmmp!”

You were silenced by Ellie’s bitter lips because of the vodka; it didn’t matter. Ellie’s fierce and hungry lips claimed yours with an urgency that took your breath away, and the bitterness was soon forgotten, replaced by the sweetness of your peach lip gloss.

Her hands confidently swept around your waist, pushing you closer to her to the point that you ended up on top of her with your hand on either side of her face, cupping her cheeks.

Ellie gently pulled away, revealing the strip of saliva between both mouths, to admire you for a moment. “Now, this is the good and quiet girl I’ve seen in class.” You could feel the embarrassment run through your entire body as you tried to get out of her lap, but Ellie’s grip became tighter on your waist. “I didn’t tell you to move. Don’t you want to continue?”

You bit your lower lip, slowly shaking your head. Ellie nodded, bringing her hands to your neck. The feel of her rough hands undoing the single knot of your halter dress made your body tremble with excitment, more knowing you weren’t even wearing a bra, so when the dress fell gracefully, you were practically naked to Ellie.

A gasp escaped your lips as I felt Ellie’s wet tongue licking your sensitive nipple before putting it all in her mouth, and you thought the scene was so obscene. You were trying to suppress your sounds so that no one inside the house would come out to see where they were coming from.

“Ellie, fuck,” you moaned softly, feeling like your core was getting wet. You needed to kiss her again, so you did it by taking a bit of initiative from the moment she started.

The kiss turned hungry, and you were so lost in it that you didn’t notice when Ellie laid you down on the grass until she broke it, leaving kisses on your neck and down to your belly button. “You don’t know how many times I’ve fantasized about this moment, of having you like this for me.”

“Shut up, you’re still a dork,” you said. Even in this situation where you were submissive, you couldn’t control your mouth. That was so funny for her.

“I think I deserve an apology from you,” Ellie said, bending down to your thighs, both hands at your sides gripping them firmly and kissing.

With one finger, she pushed aside the fabric of your thong. You could feel her breath against your clitoral area. “Don’t you plan to do it? Don’t you think I deserve it?”

She was driving you crazy talking so close to your cunt, “Oh, come on, Ellie, not right now.”

You were getting impatient. Ellie started playing with the straps of the thong as she slowly removed them. “Now or I’ll stop, and none of us want that, right?

“Fuck you, Willia—ah!” didn’t even give you time to cover your mouth, and when Ellie started licking your clit, the slurping sounds made the moment more dirty.

Her tongue was doing wonders, and you felt close. “Say how sorry you are and why.”

She demanded again; now her fingers were lingering around your needy pussycat, teasing you so bad. “I’m sorry, ok? I’m sorry for calling you a dork. Just… please, continue.”

You begged, feeling frustrated, but she wasn’t satisfied with that. “There’s more you should be sorry for; keep going.”

Her finger slipped inside your wet pussy easily, and she was going slow with it; she was torturing you. “Uh, Oh, god.”

You couldn’t contain your moans if you also had to say, “Come on, princess.”

The second and third fingers made it more difficult; at this point, this wasn’t teasing; it was a punishment.

“I can’t… I don’t know… Sorry for treating you badly; I was frustrated and took it all on you.”

With that, she quickened her movements. “You were always such a bitch to me. Now look at you, behaving like a slut.”

She let out a little chuckle, seeing how hard you were biting your fingers to not moan loudly, so she kissed you so you could drown them in her mouth.

“Mm cumming,” you mumble in between the kisses before breaking it and letting out a whimper.

Ellie could feel how your walls were wrapping her fingers and how your legs were trembling while she was kissing your neck and whispering things like ‘you did good’,’my princess’…

After you regained composure and got dressed again, you couldn’t look at Ellie in her eyes, but she was staring at you blindly.

“Don’t go around telling people about this.”

“I’d never do that.”

“And don’t think we are friends just because of what happened.”

“I don’t want to be your friend; I want more.”

Who could’ve thought that the girl you’ve been hating on for years would end up giving you the greatest orgasm you’ve ever had?

(even though you barely had any sexual experience.)

And also, she had a crush on you; she had to be the maschochissest to like you after all the bickering you two had, but there she was confessing in a vague way her feelings and waiting for your answer with her green eyes shining intensely.

“I-”

“Honey? Ellie? Where are you, girls? Time to go and say goodbye!” That was your mom’s voice approaching. You kicked the bottle of vodka into the bushes and got out of the hiding space.

“There you girls are; come on, say good-bye; Ellie has to go.”

You look at the auburn-haired girl biting your lip, feeling conflicted. “Bye, Ellie. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Not even looking at her again, you entered the house and went upstairs to your bedroom, hearing your mom say good-bye to everyone.

You threw yourself on the bed and stayed looking at the ceiling, thinking about what the fuck just happened and how tomorrow you’d have to give an answer to Ellie.

What was it going to be? Yes or No?

[justaticklishdeer]

Unconventional Methods

lots of inspo from @hype-blue-fixation

this took forever to write, give feedback! (I personally don't think this turned out too well.)

Tw/CW: Restraints, Fluff, Teasing (a ton,) tickles, gets intense in spots.

word count: 1.5k

Vox and Alastor. Rivals, enemies, whatever you call them. They were busy fighting, as usual. Alastor had antagonized the TV Overlord yet again, and now they were in the lobby of the hotel – thank God everyone else was out for the day. Besides, the gang would hate to see the mess they had made… 

‘Fucking–hold still!’ Vox snarls, jumping forward at Alastor who easily steps to the side. 

‘Hmm, I’d prefer not to. I’m not getting taken down by some picture show–’ Alastor yelps as Vox grabs him. He struggled and hissed as the TV demon ties his arms above his head. 

‘You forget I know your weaknesses, Alastor.’

‘You know nothing about me. You barely know me! You’ve been obsessed with me since day one!’ Alastor snorts, glaring at him defiantly from his restrained position. 

‘Where shall we start? Perhaps..here?’ Vox places a blue tipped claw on Alastor's palm, tracing small circles. He had completely ignored the defiant jab. Alastor’s body jerks back and he whimpers out a giggly protest. 

‘There you go, pretty boy. Trust us. Or perhaps, myself. You know you can. You want to.’ 

Alastor whines again, squeezing his eyes shut as Vox continues. Vox smirks. ‘What's wrong, ticklish little fawn? Can’t handle my claws all over your palm? Perhaps I could move them. Have them slide up this pretty forearm, up near your underarm…then, sliding down your ribs while you whine at me. Then we could tease those sides of yours, oh, yes. Sliding my claws up and down your sides while you whine and try to curl into a sickeningly sweet ball of fluffy ticklishness. Then slide down to your tummy and tease there. I could go on for hours, Alastor. Hours. How does that sound?’ 

A helpless whine was all he got. ‘Aww, is someone a ticklish little fawn? Yes you are! Come on and tell me all about it,’ Vox hums, claws tracing slowly down his forearm. Slow. Teasing. Torturous. ‘Vohox. Vohohox, plehease..’ he whines, trying to flinch back from the tickles. His restraints held fast. Vox held him still. Alastor whimpered again, a giggly mess. ‘Shh, you can take more than that. I’ve done more than this. Come on. You can do it,’ Vox croons, reaching his other hand up to gently and teasingly stroking up and down the feathery-soft edges of Alastor’s ears. The deer whines loudly, trying to shake his head. ‘Ah, ah, ah. No. Stay. Oh, good boy! Look at you, taking the tickles so well.’

Alastor whines, trying to arch away from the soft dragging of Vox’s claws. He felt Vox get close to his underarm, and he gasps and arches. ‘Nuh uh, don’t shy away! It’s alright, just stay…oh, look at you. Such a helpless fawn, ensnared in my trap.’ Vox continued to trace lighty around the area, whiney giggles and breathy sighs joining the mix. ‘Vohox, plehease..move alohohong…’

‘I don’t think I will,’ Vox hums. The deer whines and flinches, body trembling. ‘Good job, Al, you’re doing amazing for me.’ 

Alastor nods, desperate as he squirms in his restraints. Vox was sitting on his legs to make it so escape was essentially impossible. ‘I–oho! Mm-!’ Alastor cuts himself off as Vox reaches his upper rib cage. ‘Oh, so here’s a bad spot, hm? Should we…count them?’ he teases, pressing slightly harder. Alastor frantically shakes his head. Quite the deer in the headlights. ‘Plehease–plehehase–Vohohox plehease—’ 

‘Ah, ah, shh…I’m not even nearly getting started. Calm yourself, little fawn.’ The TV demon slowly traces claws down Alastor’s ribs, eliciting a small squeak and twitch every time he hits a bad spot–the bad spot essentially everywhere. Alastor’s voice was shaky and giggly, no real words really making their way out of his mouth. He bleated like a fawn helplessly. Vox’s claws dragged slower, down his sides, resting on his stomach.

He uses one hand to push Alastor’s shirt up to expose his fuzzy stomach. He could hear Alastor whimper with anticipation. ‘Oh, my dear, I haven’t even started yet! You’re already squirmy and all vocal for me!’ ‘Sh-shut up!’ Alastor whines through a fit of happy giggles and whimpers. 

Vox gently scribbled around his belly, tracing a claw around his navel. Alastor’s breath hitched as he arched his back, trying to escape the torturous feeling. The television grins. ‘You’re lucky I’m not too..hungry right now, sweetie,’ Vox murmurs, continuing with the slow dragging. ‘Stahap th-that!’ Alastor snorts, trying to tug his hands out of the restraints. Vox hums softly, ignoring the plea. ‘Plehease Vox plehease plehease–’ 

‘Nuh uh, pretty boy, ticklish little fawn, adorable buck. You’d be safewording like hell if you hated it that much,’ Vox points out, tracing shapes on Alastor’s belly. He gently traces circles and little swirls all over the fur. The deer demon lurches and writhes, whining with the giddiest look on his face. He seemed to be on a whole different cloud of fluffy happiness. 

Vox smiled, continuing the slow, teasy tickles on the deer’s sensitive tummy. ‘Does that feel good? All nice and tickly for my favorite fawn?’ Alastor giggles happily, ‘m-mhm!~’

Vox moves his claws up to Alastor’s deerlike ears. Soft strokes, nothing too much. Yet, it still had the radio demon nearly crying with silent giggles and whines. Such a strong reaction. ‘Who’s a good tickle fawn?’ Vox croons. He could feel Alastor trembling. Good. Alastor could feel phantom tickles on his stomach still, making the whole thing worse. He squirms and whimpers, little breathy giggles coming out. “Just like that, good boy.”

Alastor bleats helplessly, grinning as wide as he could while arching his back. “Hmm, now the deer noises?” “Shuhut up..”

Vox moves back down to his tummy, cooing teases at him. A claw circles his belly button, and Alastor’s hooves kick as he whines. “Pretty baby, pretty tickle baby, c'mon..you can handle it,” Vox hums, continuing the awfully slow teasing movement. Alastor whines desperately.

“Words.”

“Whahat?”

“Use your words. You’re poetic.”

“It-ihit–Vohox plehease..” 

“Please what? Words.”

Alastor flushes and his ears pin as he shakes his head. “Yohou know.” “I know. I want to hear you say it,” Vox hums, claws still teasing at the spot. 

“Vohox–! Mmm! N-noho–!”

Vox’s scritching got more intense, making the deer squirm, his ears flicking as he tried to comprehend the feeling. “Fuck–fuhuhuck–Vohox i-ihit–ihit–!”

“It what, darling?” Vox chuckles.

Vox begins to trace claws on his neck, making the radio demon whine softly and smile. ‘You know, Al, you’re quite good at handling these. Or am I not doing enough?’

‘Vohox, it-it ihis plenty.’

Vox starts applying a steady tickle to the deer’s ribs. ‘Nohoho! Vohox, plehease–’

He blinks, looking Alastor right in the eyes as he continues. ‘You’d be safewording. You enjoy it, don’t you? You love how I make you feel all tickly. And happy.’ Alastor’s ears flick and flatten, and he turns his face away. Vox took the restrained position as an opportunity to tickle Alastor’s underarms–which got a desperate whine and shriek, then loud laughter. ‘Good boy!’ Vox praises, continuing to tickle him, aiming for a full on wrecking. Alastor shrieks and phrases, trying to comprehend what was happening. 

‘Vohohohox! Plehehehease–Nohohot thehehere! Ohoho shihihiht–!’ Alastor bleats in distress, his deerlike instincts coming out profoundly. His body thrashed and Vox held him still with a firm look. Alastor whined and bleated again, melting under the eye contact. He was holding back every urge to hide his face. To hide the flusteredness. To hide how much he loved this. 

‘Hold still.’ ‘I-I cahahahan’t!’

‘Yes, you can.’ 

Vox continues, and he could see Alastor’s eyes starting to glisten with tears of pure mirth. ‘Stahahap! Nohohohot the ehehehHAHAHARS!’ 

‘Yes, the ears. You know I couldn’t resist. They’re just so…fluffy, pure. Surely the radio host can handle it? Or perhaps…I could show this to all of hell? Let them know how much of a ticklish little fawn you are?’ Vox suggests, tracing claws down the feathery soft edges of his ears. He moves to Alastor’s tummy, scribbling all eight claws over the sensitive fur and skin beneath it. Alastor screams before his laughter fades to soft radio static and silence. 

‘REHEHED! ReHEhehed! SHhihiHit!’ Alastor practically screams the safeword, and Vox instantly stops. He reaches up to untie Alastor, chuckling as the radio host throws himself onto Vox with exhausted pants. He giggles occasionally in between breaths, and Vox gently rubs his shoulders to get rid of any of the phantom tickles. He offers the deer a glass of water which the former gladly accepts. 

‘You alright?’ Vox asks, amusement and fondness in his tone. Alastor nods, downing the water rather quickly. Vox notices and hums, ‘More?’ Another nod. He stands up and gently sits Alastor on the sofa. ‘Here. Stay, I’ll go grab more water.’ 

Alastor pants out, ‘Y-yohou’re evil…’

‘I’m an Overlord, darling. It’s my job. Now rest up. Can't have your hotel staff know about this, can we?’ Alastor’s cheeks redden and he shakes his head, mumbling, ‘They can’t know.’

‘Mhm. Now rest up, okay?’ Vox sighs softly, gazing down fondly at Alastor as he dozes off on him.

Perhaps…perhaps this wasn’t so bad after all.

[vibraniumavenger]

Ties That Mend -Part 1

TW/CW: Alcohol, Tony's self destructive tendencies, if there's any more let me know and I'll add them!

A/N: This is something I started many years ago, I just never finished it. I'm currently working on the next few parts, I'm accepting suggestions on where this should go too! It's not the best but I hope you enjoy.

Lugging your suitcase behind you, you hesitantly walked into the elevator. You pressed the button that read 'Floor 12' and waited as it made its way up. You were nervous, you didn't want to be here. Unfortunately, being the newest Avenger meant you had to stay at the tower against your will. You were not impressed. 

You finally reached your desired floor, before taking a step out. All eyes drifted to your current position and you felt somewhat nervous. They all stood and made their way over to greet you. You extended your hand towards them, allowing them to shake your hand if necessary. A red headed woman was the first to introduce herself. "I'm Agent Romanoff, I'll be your training partner and mentor. If you have any questions, feel free to ask me. Director Fury assigned you to me for a reason. He deems you worthy, now prove it. As an avenger, you have responsibilities and commitments. We look out for each other, okay? Don't screw up." She warned. All you could do was nod in agreement, your eyes slightly widened. Her face softened and that's when she let out a small chuckle. "You can call me Natasha. I promise, I don't bite. I'm sorry for scaring you." 

You relaxed as she took your hand and shook it, before turning to the man that stood next to her. "This is Clint. He's annoying, but you get used to it." She earned a groan of playful annoyance from him before he shoved her. She proceeded to introduce everybody else, until she got to the last few members. "Hey, I'm Sam." He smirked, sending you a wink. You couldn't help but scoff. "And I'm not interested." You shot back before turning to the next guy. 

"This is Tony, I’m sure you’ve probably heard of him. He owns the tower, designs the equipment we use. Also, his ego is bigger than his wallet, so be warned." She joked. You turned away from him quickly, forcing your attention on anything else. His face dropped, but he quickly fixed it before the others noticed. 

"I'm Y/N." you smiled. "Can somebody show me to my room?" Tony was quick to offer his assistance, but you brushed it off. "Nat, do you mind? I do have a few questions…" she agreed and you grabbed your suitcase, following her closely. Tony sighed, pouring himself a whiskey and knocking it back quickly. 

Reaching your room, you thanked Natasha, politely declining her offer of assistance before closing the door behind you. Deciding you would unpack, you emptied your possessions onto the floor. You organised your clothes, placing them in your wardrobe shortly after. Your bathroom was then full of toiletries and you even hung up a few photos. It finally suited your style. By the time you finished, you were exhausted. You just wanted to sleep. Unfortunately, sleep was one of your biggest struggles. If you slept more than four hours, or even slept without a nightmare, it was guaranteed you were becoming sick, which also wasn't very often. 

A voice filled your room, alerting you that dinner was being served. You knew it was Jarvis. Making your way to the dining room, a familiar scent filled the air. A small smile graced your face as you entered the room, your favourite meal presented on the table. Taking a seat in between Bucky and Clint, you waited until everybody else had loaded their plate before taking your own portion and tucking in. You ate in silence as conversations erupted around you, each person enjoying the food prepared for them as they socialised with their team mates. 

"Y/N, why don't you tell us about yourself?" Steve suggested politely. You hesitated, unsure of what to say. "I-uh, I'm not that interesting. There's nothing really important about me." Tony scoffed, causing everybody to raise their eyebrows and turn their gazes to him. You rolled your eyes before continuing. "What do you guys want to know?" 

This time, Wanda was the one to ask. "Is there a significant other we need to know about?” She wiggles her eyebrows in a teasing manner, causing you to blush profusely. After shaking your head, Sam piped up. "In that case, how about you and I get to know each other?" The rest of the team laughed as he sent you a wink. 

"Like I said earlier bird brain, not interested." You playfully shot back. His right hand lay over his heart and he feigned hurt, causing you to roll your eyes again. "We heard you're pretty smart. In fact, you have similar knowledge to both Tony and I. It'd be nice to have your input on a few projects if you're willing to?" Bruce smiled. You smiled back, nodding your head and confirming your availability to help. Tony watched you inquisitively throughout it all. "You must've had a real good education. Where did you go?" Bruce asked again. 

"I was homeschooled, taught by my father until he passed, my brother until the age of 16 and then my Aunt. By then, I knew everything there was to know. All I had to do was go to college to take the exams, the rest is history." You replied. “Your brother must be an exceptional man. I'd love to meet him one day." Bruce responded. You gave a small nod, brushing off any emotions. Steve spoke up again. "So, do you like jogging?" He simply asked. "I do, I go twice a day. Know any good spots?" You questioned. "Sam and I actually go twice a day too, you're more than welcome to join us." You smiled, thanking him before finishing your food. 

"Would you care for a drink?" Thor held the amber liquid out to you. Shaking your head, you declined. "I don't drink." You stated casually before standing up and clearing your plate. The rest of the team did the same and you decided to excuse yourself before they could ask you anything else. You bid them goodnight, walking into the elevator and eventually back to your room. Your nightly routine commenced and you slid into your bed, laying in the darkness until your eyes fluttered closed and you fell into a deep slumber. 

You were already awake when Steve knocked on your door at the crack of dawn. He was surprised, but didn't think too much of it. You met Sam in the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water before making your way to the ground floor and exiting the tower into the cold air. It was refreshing, to say the least. A smile graced your face once again as you made your way to the park. Sam thought it necessary to explain the 'on your left' situation and you were glad. Steve ran ahead of you both. You started off slow with Sam, easing yourself into the exercise. Once you got into a rhythm, you sped up and quickly approached Steve who was miles ahead moments before. "Hey Rogers, on your left!" His face was priceless as you overtook him, a smug look plastered on your face. This continued until you were all satisfied with the miles achieved, making your way back to the tower immediately after. "You got heart kid." He complimented as you exited the elevator. You rolled your eyes as Tony came into sight, a glass of whiskey glued to his hand. 

"Tony, it's 10 in the morning. Could you not wait?" Sam enquiries. Tony chuckled, knocking back the drink before pouring himself another. "Isn't it too early for you to be on my case?" He shot back rather defensively. You were somewhat relieved when Sam took the alcoholic beverage and disposed of it, snapping Tony out of his self-destructive tendencies temporarily. 

You began walking off, eager to jump in the shower to rid yourself of the sweat. The footsteps behind you got closer and a tight grip around your arm stopped you. "Did you put him up to that?" Tony asked rather harshly. You laughed in the least humorous manner. "I didn't do shit, Stark. Let go of me." He refused, roughly tightening his grip as you stumbled back into the wall. "You need to grow up, Y/N." he sneered. "You have no control over me. As far as I'm concerned, you're dead to me,” you announced, wiggling from his grip and walking quickly to your room, slamming the door and locking it. 

You kept your distance for the next few weeks, avoiding Tony at all costs. During dinner, the tension was high and it was clear to everybody you did not get along. If only they knew. Of course, Tony was planning to throw another one of Stark's famous parties much to your dismay. You made it clear you would not be attending. 

"But Y/N, it's the first party since you joined! You have to come, it'll be fun. Please?" Wanda begged. You shook your head. "I don't drink, nor do I like parties. I never have." You admitted. Tony rolled his eyes at this statement. "If she doesn't want to go, we can't force her." Bruce defended you. "Don't worry Y/N, I won't be going either." You sent him a thankful smile before walking back to your room, leaving them to plan. 

A few days later, it was Tony's party. Hundreds of guests arrived, causing the levels of sound to increase dramatically. The DJ let the music blare and the tower practically shook. The whole team dressed to perfection, giving you a smile before going down to the lower level. You sigh, flopping onto the sofa with your laptop as you begin typing out your work. Fury would kill you if you didn't get it in on time. Bruce checked up on you, bringing you a tea and a few snacks to help you focus. He sat next to you, enjoying your company as you spoke continuously about your research. It had reached 11pm when Bruce began growing tired. He politely excused himself, wishing you a goodnight before traipsing off to his room. Many hours later, the rest of the team made their way up. It was clear they were absolutely wasted, their inability to stand was a major hint. You couldn't help but laugh when Clint tripped and Natasha fell down beside him, laughing harder than she usually would. After helping them off the floor, you lead them to their rooms and ensured they were safe in bed before making your way to your room. 

Slipping into your pyjamas, you closed your eyes. Unfortunately, sleep did not come. A loud crash caused you to shoot up from your bed, you grabbed your gun and tiptoed throughout the tower until you found the culprit. Tony was sprawled out on the floor, the glass from the now broken coffee table underneath him. You mentally groaned, you did not want to help him. You knew you couldn't just leave him there. You studied his body quickly, discovering a small cut to his face and hand. Reaching down, you managed to pull him up (with great difficulty) and supported him until you reached the infirmary. Throwing him onto the bed, you grabbed a few supplies. 

"Get away from me, what are you doing?" He asked, slurring each word. "You're hurt, I'm helping you." You told him. Using the tweezers, you carefully took the shards of glass from the wounds. He winced, trying to pull away but you held him down. Next, you cleaned it. He let out an audible groan but all you did was roll your eyes. It was his own fault, after all. Luckily, it wasn't too deep. You bandaged his hand and stuck a few steri-strips to his forehead, closing the small wound. You were about to move him again, when he stopped you. 

"You don't care, why are you helping me?" He asked. You thought for a moment, not looking him in the eyes. "Because if I didn't, who would?" This silenced him. You steadied him on his feet, before throwing his arm over your shoulder as you took him to his room. You lay him softly, taking his shoes and jacket off and throwing his duvet over him. He seemed satisfied as you lay painkillers and water on his nightstand before turning around. Just as you turn the light off, you hear him. "I know you hate me and I'm sorry..." his snores fill the room as you close the door, brushing off his words and making your way back to your room. "Jarvis, wipe all cctv footage." You demanded. "As you wish." He complied. Soon, you fell into a deep sleep. 

Find part 2 here.

[isobel-thorm]

Call Me When You're Sober

Ship: Past Enver Gortash x Tav (Reina) Rating: M Summary: As pieces of Reina's forgotten past start revealing themselves, including her old ties to Lord Gortash, ignorance can no longer stay bliss, and she has her memories restored. Instead of fixing things, it only complicates them. Note: Features @euryalex's Tara, heavy spoilers for Act 3, NSFT (don't get too excited, nothing terribly spicy)

It wasn't supposed to go like this. Memory loss from a head injury was going to be a setback, not a curse. But seeing the apparition in front of her, she wasn't so sure.

“...I thought we were friends. Return to the city, find Orin, and claim her Netherstone as you agreed to do. And then I will forget this transgression.”

Reina stared at the flickering blue image of Gortash on the screen that had popped up on the sub, hardly paying attention to the threat. This was the face of the man who her old self was bound to, who had memories with her that were all but ghosts now. He had kissed her so thoroughly when he found out she wasn’t Orin in her form that it gave more questions than answers. 

The projection’s eyes found hers briefly, and his lip curled again just as it had hours prior. Something inside her lurched. She hated disappointing him. But why? Why did this break her? He was a threat. He was a problem they needed to solve. But now he was stopping them from resolving a bigger problem. The phantom turned his attention back to Farowyn and arched a questioning eyebrow. 

Farowyn leaned forward, closer to the screen. “Hey Gortash, cut the-“

“Farowyn, stop…” Reina’s voice came softy from behind her. It sounded off, too far away. 

Farowyn turned to look at her. “What? You can’t seriously be considering his offer any longer."

Whatever challenge was on Gortash’s face seconds ago was suddenly gone, replaced by smugness. “Oh? What’s this? Trouble within the ranks? You should all listen to-“ 

“Gor-“ Reina cut herself off. No. Use the first name she had learned. Maybe it would help. “Enver. Please. You too. I cannot do this any longer. I’ve lost too many people I’ve come to care about when I’ve had nothing for weeks. I can’t let this happen. I can’t let you hurt anyone else.”

He was ready to meet her protest. “Good. So tell your people to turn around-“

“No,” Reina cut him off, trying not to flinch at the venom he had said 'yours' with. “Not to mention I’m down here, you blow this place up, I go down with the ship. And I doubt you want that. I have a new offer.” 

He looked through her now. The resulting silence was deafening, only broken by the metallic clanging of the submersible. And then:  “I’m listening.”

“You let these people go. The Duke, the Mind Flayer, the Gondians. All of these people go free.”

“For?”

“Me. You wanted your audience, you want to talk things out, it’s done. I’ll come willingly but these people get to see daylight again.” 

Her friends all started talking at once, but she held up a hand to quiet them. “If you kill these people, we are done. No chances for ‘amends’ or ‘getting to know you again.’”

His image stared her down again, and something in the strange shift of energy made her feel like they were the only two people there in that moment. In another life, in another time, it should’ve felt romantic.

“Quite the bargaining chip you’re about to throw away, My Darling. You’ve assessed your value to me correctly. Underestimated, even. But are you sure you’re willing to play that hand now? Give yourself up for all these people?” His tone was the usual mocking he spoke to them with, but there was something else there this time. Then, without the mocking edge: “They’re strangers.”

“So are you.” 

Something flashed in his eyes, even conveyed over the magical waves. He glanced away, clearly having battling thoughts. 

Shit. That had hurt him, gotten him where it counted. It was good, but she knew it could end badly. She needed to make or break this. “But I’m willing to change that so long as this goes my way.” Still, she needed something else. “If you love me as much as you want me to think you do, you’ll do this.” The manipulation felt wrong, dirty, cruel - but this was his game and she was going to play it. Briefly she wondered if this was the old her coming through. Was she so vicious before, with her words like knives just like him? Is that why they had worked so well? 

Gortash was silent again, fuming, and briefly Reina wondered if she had ruined everything, if he was going to set the place to ruin over her interference.

“… Fine. Conditions met.” He turned to Farowyn. “Go rescue these people. Be the heroes you so desperately want to be. We will talk when it’s sorted after you’ve surfaced.” He did nothing to hide the underlying threat. The alliance could be in peril now. “And Reina,” he turned his attention back to her. “Come home. Alone.” 

The feed cut off, and everyone in the sub waited in dead silence for a few seconds. They hardly believed that it had worked. So they waited a few more minutes, but no threat came. The place remained intact- if not a little rickety. 

Farowyn, Gale, Wyll and Astarion had gone down to retrieve Wyll’s father, Omeluum and the others. 

Reina had stayed behind, lost in her own head and trying to help the survivors get settled as they came up. She tried to sort out the scraps that she had learned from the man himself. She had been Gortash’s right hand. They had been engaged to be married. They had a son. And there wasn’t supposedly a lie if the negotiation on the sub was to be believed. He loved- or perhaps just cared for her enough that he would trade anything for her safe return. There were too many moving parts now. She tucked her head down, hovering just above her knees as the world spun. It was too much all at once. She was torn, but why? Were her old memories somewhere in her brain causing conflict? Was she endlessly loyal to Gortash? Did part of her not want them to succeed for fear of losing him? By the time they had reached the surface and given up the sub’s captain to the ladies of the water, Reina had come to a conclusion. If she was going to Gortash, she was going to try to be prepared as possible. She was going to talk to the Emporer to see if it was possible to put her memories right. Maybe it was the tadpole interfering. And so she had taken the Artifact from Farowyn briefly, asked for an audience, and the Emporer had arrived, heard her request, and with a deep sigh- admitted it all. 

The head injury she had chalked up her amnesia to was a cover story- fed to her by the Emporer no less. The Mind Flayer had come across her on the beach, recognized her from her past with Gortash, and upon knowing she was a fierce, powerful fighter they could use, had wiped the better part of the last thirteen years from her brain- all of the ties to Gortash. ‘I needed an asset, not a liability.’ 

It felt like the worst betrayal yet. Now all she felt like was a loose cannon with no clear allies outside the main group. Most of the trust she had built in him all but disappeared in an instant. Maybe she should’ve gone to Raphael about all this. Too late now. “Fuck that. Give me back what you took,” Reina spoke after a long moment. It was the only way she could trust him again. Besides, Gortash had named his terms: “Come home.” It was simple- but then she had no idea where ‘home’ was. And then she concluded she needed her memories back to have the biggest chance- and she would make the Emporer return them. 

“That will prove to be an unwise choice,” The Emporer answered. 

“I don’t care. I’ve lost enough. Give me back what you took. Give me back my life.” 

“And if you revert to… your old self?” The Emporer inquired. 

“Then you can sense it, and you’ve got all these people here to strike me down for it.” 

“Are you… sure, Rei?” Karlach asked from the back. 

Reina looked at her. Of course, Karlach would be the most skeptical. She deserved to be. And her heart ached for the both of them. It was true. What if she did come back… different? Her old self? How would she be with Karlach? Still, she wanted to try. Needed to. “I have to, Karlach. I can’t… not know. This whole time I’ve felt like more than my memories are missing, and now I know why, and I just-”

“I get it,” Karlach offered. She smiled weakly, but it didn’t reach her eyes. 

“Hey, Emperor, everybody. Karlach gets the first and last shot at me if this ends badly, and I go back to Stab-Happy me.” 

Karlach laughed weakly, and the others merely murmured in agreement, too weary to say much else. “For what it’s worth, love or loved the new you.” 

“Same to you.” 

Karlach hesitated, then pulled her into a hug before releasing her quickly. “Sorry. I just… needed to get that in. Just in case.” 

“It’s good. I’m glad you did,” Reina assured her. She looked at the others, who merely watched her sadly or nodded their own brief potential goodbyes. She turned back to the Emporer. “Now, do it.” 

The Emporer nodded. “It will feel strange,” he explained before he drifted over to her. 

“Worth it.” 

He extended a hand, and magic flowed between his fingers. He waited a moment, then touched her head. 

The effect was immediate. There was a rush of strange energy, enough to send her to her knees. Her head spun, and then suddenly, there were rushes of images- memories. 

She was young, surviving on the streets. A woman steals the bread she had paid a few days’ wages to get. She’s hungry, desperate. The next moment, the thief lies dead in the street, her blood running off the knife in Reina’s hand. It wouldn’t be the last time she did it. Several such occurrences pile on from the first. 

The flashes continue as they slide back into place in her mind. Her first was certainly not the last. More people fall to her blade—some over important offenses and petty reasons. A Flaming Fist grabs her ass at a tavern. She pounces, clawing at his face and shoving a knife between his ribs. She’s got an audience. She’s immediately thrown out of the bar and is threatened that more of the Fists are on the way. So she runs- straight into a broad chest once she goes around the corner. One of the stranger’s hands cradles her elbow and the other her waist as he apologizes, but before she can accuse him of being a lech, his hands are gone. He introduces himself as ‘Enver’ and informs her he saw the ‘display’ at the tavern. She panics, and then he’s got the audacity to shush her, and she’s incredulous until he offers an easy, knowing, attractive smile and offers her a job. He’s got a ‘dangerous’ business to run, and he needs someone to watch his back who isn’t ‘afraid to get their hands dirty.’ She feels like it’s a trap of some sort, then he assures her it ‘pays handsomely.’ What was she supposed to do?

Time drifts forward. She becomes Enver’s right hand, mostly there to stand silent and look scary and produce a flame in her hands when things start to sour. 

Men cheat Enver, and they meet her blade or fire - it doesn’t matter which one to her. 

Enver wines and dines her on occasion after a ‘job well done,’ and the pair talk about their rough pasts. It’s nice knowing someone else out there had been so wronged. He starts calling her “Reina, my Reina,” and it warms her in all the right places. 

Enver gains power, and ‘Gortash’ starts carrying weight around town. Still, people doubt his prowess, and they either suffer the fate of the others or they’re spooked enough by her looming presence that they relent. 

Months later, there’s some big job. Reina doesn’t understand all the details. Still, Enver does most of the intimidating this time. She’s there for backup. It’s got no business being so attractive. After they come into their payday, Reina guides him into a dark corner outside his home when they’ve seen his buyers off, basking and emboldened with the heat in his eyes as he lets himself be led. She leans up and kisses him. It’s slow, and after a moment, Reina realizes he isn’t giving much in return, and she pulls back, afraid she misread the signs, and then suddenly he’s on her, crushing her to the stone wall and kissing her back with three times the force she had. Her world narrows down to him, trying to keep track of limbs when they get lost in each other, and when he hoists her up into his arms, she goes willingly, locking her arms around him as he tries to get back into his home as quickly as possible. 

They don’t even make it to the damned bed. There’s a table in the foyer, and Enver shoves everything off of it before placing her on it, and they get to work tearing at clothes. And then he’s inside her as the pair exchange heated kisses. They eventually make it to his bed, and she rides him, and everything feels right in the world. 

Life continues like that. She intimidates his enemies; he makes deals, they fuck. At some point, lust turns firmly to love, and she hopes it’s mutual. Enver recruits more people to the cause. One such person is Karlach, and somewhere where her minds are meeting, her stomach twists at the recognition. 

Enver’s invited to parties now, given his reputation. He brings her on his arm, and she feels all sorts of powerful, enjoying the thrills of high society, the dresses, the wine, the poorly disguised competitions of who’s got more money or power or whatever the current interest was. 

One such party has her in a flowing red dress that leaves nothing to the imagination. Enver can barely keep his hands off her between the business dealings, and she soaks it all in. They speak to someone; she can’t recall his name. Aevan, she thinks. Enver’s hands rest teasingly on her thigh under their dinner table as they talk business. 

Reina grows bored with it quickly, and her eyes drift to a raven-haired elf in the corner, looking terrified. Tara. It was Aevan. They had known each other. Or maybe ‘known’ was a strong word. 

After that, she sees Aevan more and Tara less. It’s a concern, but she’s not that invested. Business is business. 

Somehow Enver grows powerful enough to deal with Zariel. She doesn’t know the details either, but he’s anxious. Karlach goes missing from the glimpses after that and she assumes there was a deal for her. Her current knowledge swims with the newly revealed information, and the twist in her stomach becomes a damned tempest. She knew. She knew.

Later, a doctor tells her she’s with child. Enver’s ecstatic, talking about legacy, a family. She points out that the mighty Enver Gortash shouldn’t have a bastard child. He proposes then and there, and she insists that he shouldn’t be ‘marrying the help’ either- and to his credit, he’s incredulous at that, assuring her that she’s more, but she refuses- and then tells him they’ll be married ‘when he means it’- she didn’t even understand that now. She wants to be ‘away from it all’, and the same should be said about raising a child. She supposes that’s clearer. Perhaps. Enver buys them another house in the Lower City by the water. A ‘Summer Home’ he had called it, though it had gained the reputation of a ‘Love Nest’ for those of his associates who had started to wonder about Gortash and his ‘Head of Security’ but had no idea about the boy.

Their son- Thomas, is born and grows. She takes a temporary retirement from her position to raise him. Enver’s a decent father, stopping by as much as possible given his ever-growing-busier schedule. He’s there for the milestones: first steps, first words. 

Thomas is four when Enver gets the idea for what she now knows is the Steel Watch. When he’s at home, he tinkers with various mechanical pieces, talking at Thomas for the most part as the boy watches him without knowing what he’s doing. It’s a lovely, joyful sight for the old Reina, but the tempest in the new one’s stomach sours. Gortash is dangerous, not to be trusted, not to be humanized, but there’s something too soft in this. She knows it’s real, but it feels wrong. Enver isn’t Gortash.

The Steel Watch idea takes off. Enver becomes less of a laughing stock in town as the first few models help with Baldur’s Gate security. 

She makes a passing joke about being redundant after the Steel Watch takes over her job. He assures her that it wouldn’t happen; she’s still his favorite guard and takes her to bed to prove it. It should’ve been sweet. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. 

A competitor tries to kill Enver sometime after that. Enver survives, Reina comes out of retirement to strike the man down, and they move on, but Enver’s weary. Good, Newer Reina notes bitterly.

Enver makes a special Steel Watch automaton as a gift for Thomas’ seventh birthday. An added security measure, designed solely to keep close to Thomas, keep him safe from threats ‘as backup to his dear mother, of course.’  Thomas nicknames him ‘Shadow’ fittingly. 

Months pass of the same. Enver starts a project that he keeps mostly quiet about. He’s quick to relent when she finally asks, holding her close and telling her stories about the Absolute and being a Chosen for Bane. It sounds like nonsense, but there had been rumors about these ‘Absolute’ attacks around the city where people credited ‘her.’ She’s skeptical, but he apologizes for keeping her out of the loop and promises to do better. Liar, New Reina thinks. 

Unfortunately, she’s proven wrong. Enver’s very open about it and starts talking about ‘invasion plans.’ It’s still preposterous until he notes that it’s an easy power grab for them. A better life for them and Thomas. A nicer life, ‘no more shadows. Well, aside from our automaton friend.’ 

He eases her concerns with a kiss and a “Marry me now” against her lips. She agrees. He takes her to bed again, asking how ‘Lady Gortash’ sounds, going over a would-be timeline in the afterglow. There’d be a coronation. He’d marry her that day, declare her his wife after he was knighted. Let Thomas’ secret out. Sure, he’d have a reputation, but who would argue with a Lord? A Lord with Bane’s blessing behind him? 

It works. New Reina wished it didn’t.

Old Reina teases him afterward, telling him she wants him all to herself- a small wedding before the pomp and circumstance. Only they would know about it, their little secret. 

He agreed, and then, the following day, he arranged the paperwork and an officiant and married her by the sea a couple of days later, promising that she’d get the ‘real doting’ she deserved at the ceremony. 

It hit Reina then as the memory slid home. The Coronation. When this version of her met him, she crashed her own wedding without knowing it. No wonder Gortash had been so stunned. Not only that, but she was a bride with no memory. That explained it. Orin had called her ‘Runaway Bride’ in the sewers. The missing pieces slid into place. All the confusion began to clear. 

Fittingly, she meets Orin next in her memories. She’s terrifying as she was months or weeks or whatever it was later.  Orin tests her, producing a knife seemingly out of thin air and dancing the tip along Enver’s side when he had been distracted enough when it first made contact that he didn’t react until it dug into his skin. Reina had been faster, however, rushing her and pressing the blade against Orin’s throat. 

Orin had giggled at that and clapped, declaring that she liked her. ‘You’re much too fun for Gortash.’ 

She disappeared in a red cloud after that. 

Reina had barely left Enver’s side after that- until she had to. 

Some sort of ship appeared, ripping its way through the atmosphere. There was panic in the streets, and she had gone out to quell some of it, only for Orin to pop up in front of her when she had made it to the city proper. 

“So sorry about this, Spare, but Gortash loves you so, so very much - it’s going to be fun watching him struggle without you. Hurting him is just… so delicious. Wonder how he’ll cope with a runaway bride.” 

She had stared for a moment, then upon figuring that had been an apt threat, she pulled her knife on her, then froze when Orin shifted into a mirror image of her. She finally found herself on the receiving end of her own predatory smile. Orin-Her waved, and Reina turned to see a large tentacle directly behind her. She barely had time to react before it collided with her chest, and she felt herself get ripped to shreds- 

And she woke in one piece, locked into some sort of apparatus in the dark- on the ship? She panicked, but the more she struggled, the tighter the strange bonds on her limbs and over her chest tightened. There was suddenly a hiss, and a red mist spilled into the pod. She fell into a deep sleep. 

She woke to the sound of an explosion. She looked around, and there was chaos. The dark surroundings were engulfed in flames, falling apart. From straight ahead, someone had jumped out of a hole ripped into the ship's side. One of her future companions, no doubt. Sleep called to her again, and despite fighting it, she went back under. She woke up shortly after as the flames had grown since- but that also meant she had less time to escape. She struggled again, and the bonds loosened. Good. Whatever mechanic had been hit controlled her bonds. She rotated her wrists experimentally, and when the bonds gave more, she faced her palms out towards the glass, focused, and sent flames hitting the cover. It shattered, and after some maneuvering, she wiggled out the rest of the way. She found her footing and immediately headed for the hole, but the ship suddenly lurched and sent her flying. 

The ship took another hit, and the velocity sent her straight for the hole. She was relieved- until she cleared the ship and realized just how far up the ship had been. There was a thousand-foot drop from her and the ground, and it was closing in fast. Well, that just did it. She was about to die due to someone finally cheating her. It was karma, she supposed. Thomas, I’m sorry. 

New Reina held her breath just as much- this was it. How it all happened. 

She closed her eyes and waited, expecting it to all stop, but even as she could hear the wind growing louder, passing around trees or whatever would be her grave, it all stopped. She risked cracking an eye open, only to find she was surrounded by some sort of purple magic, hovering a mere few inches up off the ground. What in the Hells? The purple faded, and she was dropped gently on the ground. She sat up and then panicked again when the space in front of her seemed to tear open, and a Mind Flayer stepped out of the gap. She screamed, only for it to lift a hand- and silence her. That did nothing to her, and she tried to scream louder and went for her knife, but it was long gone, probably lost in the fall. 

The Mind Flayer stepped closer and shifted his hand. “You. This is a surprise.”  the Emporer’s voice entered her mind. He closed in, touching the side of her head, then the front. You will be useful. Well, if that wasn’t a terrifying thought. “Be at peace. I will find you and the others later.” 

Suddenly there was a tremendous pressure- not pain, but not pleasant either, and Reina felt it all over again as she realized this was the turning point- undoing whatever memory magic he had used.

The matching sensations collided, and whatever remaining loose ends in her memory slammed back into place, and Reina was whole again- no Old Her, no new. Just her. It was overwhelming and dizzying, and when she felt The Emporer’s hand release her - the snap feeling was enough to send her to the ground, retching. Even her magic was skewed by the sensation- she felt flames explode from her hands into the sand below them, and she would hardly be surprised if she pulled glass up with them. 

Her head stopped spinning, and she looked up at the others. The Emporer observed her, subtly leaning towards Farowyn- a silent order to be ready to strike. She looked at the others gaping at her, but then her focus immediately shifted to Tara and Karlach, standing together, also leaning towards each other, clearly aware that they’d be the most affected by the retrieval of her memories. She shot upright, and they visibly tensed, ready to go onto the defense, and even if she expected to be attacked, she launched herself at the pair of them, looping an arm around each of them, pulling them closer, shoving her neck between them so she could force their heads together. She didn’t know when she started sobbing, but she was.  “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I couldn’t- I can’t- I-”

“Good. We get Rei back. So long, Bronze,” Karlach offered, careful where she held her to return the hug. “Can’t exactly forgive you from back then, but this one? Yeah. ‘Sides, I guess Gortash’s dick can be a hell of a manipulator. Unfortunately.”

Reina managed a half-laugh, half-grossed-out groan that matched Karlach’s even as she made the joke. She looked Tara’s way, and when the woman offered a reassuring smile but said nothing, she sighed, trying to gather herself. “Aevan’s on the list of bastards we take down after all this if we make it out alive. I promise.” 

“Sounds good to me,” Tara agreed. 

Reina looked at the others, who were all watching them curiously, either touched or relieved- to her own surprise, Astarion was in the group of the former. She turned her attention back to the Emporer. She opened her mouth, then shut it. 

“I hope you can understand.  It was the only way.” It hesitated. “I implore you honestly: Can you pursue our cause with this knowledge? I will know if you lie.” 

She stared at him incredulously, then sighed. “I…” Did she truly not know after this? Her mind was still swimming with the possibilities, the conflicting feelings. Could she betray the man that she did love? Gortash hadn’t remotely lied about that. “Yes. But… my son. I need him safe. I… I need to play the field, but I’m with you. En- Gortash has caused too much damage. They all have. My son’s got nothing to do with this. He’s innocent, he doesn’t understand.” 

The Emperor waited a moment, then nodded. “See that it is done. I sensed no ill will in the boy. Hardly his father’s son.”

She didn’t care for his tone then, picking up on a hypothetical threat. If he did show any of Gortash’s personality, what then? Protectiveness swelled in her.  No wonder she had been so inclined to care for every child she came across. It was probably part of her trying to remind her of Thomas. 

The Mind Flayer picked up on it and put his hands out, this time in relative surrender. “He’s safe from harm; you have my word. I have no doubt you’ll keep him from straying from the right path.”

She didn’t know how to dignify that with a response. “I’ll make contact as soon as I can.” 

“See that you do,” The Emporer responded, keeping her gaze when she glared back at him. 

The others protested, too, promising not to stray far from the estate once she pointed it out on a map from the glimpses she had seen. She had said her goodbyes then and headed for the Upper City, finally reaching their mansion. Bronze accents were everywhere. She supposed they really did have a color theme going. 

The front door opened and Gortash himself looked back at her from the threshold. She couldn’t read his face, much like she couldn’t on the sub. Sure, there was cold fury there, disappointment, skepticism, but something warmer. Relief? Hope, in an ironic twist? It was a small comfort that she didn’t know, even with her memories intact. She understood him less than she feared. 

They continued the stare down for a while, and when Reina took a careful step forward, eyes not leaving his, he finally stepped aside and crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Reina, My Reina. Welcome home.” 

[harmonie-writes]

The Hunt pt. 9

Werewolf! Wonwoo x hunter! Reader

Summary: After going in different directions to work on different cases, you receive an alarming call. Driving to a small town that has wild nightlife and strange occurrences you begin your search for your missing hunting partner. This case you are about to take on will rival the others you’ve completed in the past. What could possibly happen as you search for your brother in arms?

Warnings: false identity, potential violence, language, depictions of gore, death, alcohol, mentions of nudity, angst, fluff. Story is purely for fictitious purposes and doesn't portray actual people.

Word count: ~1.9k

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Previously on The Hunt:

"Once you know of the unknown it's really hard to look the other way and pretend everything is normal. They showed me the ropes and took me on hunts. They essentially adopted me into their tiny family."

You didn't realize it, but a single tear had run down your cheek as you were brought back into your memories. You chuckle dryly and use your free hand to rub your face. "I guess there's some supernatural cases that even seasoned hunters don't know about."

Wonwoo glances down at you before flicking his gaze over his shoulder. He knew that the rest of the pack was listening to your story. He just knows that there's going to be more questions in the morning.

»»————-　➴　————-««

Tired eyes, with evident bags, clung to your eyelids as you glanced at the morning sun peeking above the treeline. The pyre had burned out a few hours ago, but moving from your spot meant that your childhood friend, your partner and best friend, was officially gone. Nothing more than a memory.

Shifting your gaze from the trees to the wolf next to you, you were surprised to find him already staring at you. How unfortunate for you though since he still looked like the Greek God of Adonis, while you probably looked like a wreck.

Out of your peripheral, you noticed that the rest of Wonwoo’s pack had stayed outside. Whether the reason was respect for tradition or not you weren't quite sure, but at the moment it brought a small smile to your lips.

"Thank you for staying out here with me," your voice sounded rough from the lack of use in the last couple of hours, but you were grateful for the company.

Wonwoo gave you a small smile and a gentle squeeze of your hand. "Our species may not exactly see eye to eye on things, but we do know good people when we see them."

You give his hand a small squeeze but don't make any move to comment any further. Instead, you decide that you've been out in the cold long enough and give what's left of Adam's remains a final look before meeting Wonwoo’s gaze one more time. "I think I'm ready to go."

Wonwoo brushes off his sweats before leading you back to the cabin which is now absent of the wolves that were previously on the porch.

As your feet touch the steps of the porch is the moment you can hear the hustle and bustle of what you imagine is a morning routine.

Following Wonwoo into the cabin was a little strange, you spotted the same tall wolf from yesterday prepping what you assumed was breakfast in the kitchen. The pack leader who spoke to you when you were tied up was reading a book in one of the lounge chairs in one of the morning sunbeams. You didn't really know much about the rest of the pack, but three wolves were sitting on the floor in front of the TV watching a movie and you assumed the rest had wandered off to go about their day.

A thought started forming and you realized that this is what a family looked like, only they could turn into wolves if they so choose to do so.

Glancing back around the room you noticed that Seungcheol had set his book down and was staring at you. Releasing a sigh you made your way over to him and he gestured to the couch next to him. You sank into the cushions slowly and waited for him to say something. The few seconds that went by felt like an eternity because you weren't entirely sure where you stood with this kind pack, considering you were a hunter.

Seungcheol let out a small hum before situating himself so he could face you more. "So, now that this is all done what do you plan to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're a hunter, right? You know about us."

You nod slowly, picking up what he's talking about. "If you mean about your pack, I don't plan to do anything about it." You pick at the skin around your thumb before continuing. "Your pack seems to have been around for several years, and there hasn't been one thing mentioned in any papers that would lead other hunters to believe that you exist in this town."

You look at the wolves mingling around you and notice that whatever they were doing seemed to have been put on pause as they listened to you talk with their alpha.

"You won't say anything?" Seungcheol leaned in your direction as if trying to startle you, but it didn't phase you.

"No, I don't think I will." Your gaze meets Wonwoo's and you give him a small smile.

Seungcheol seemed satisfied with your answer and relaxed back into his chair. "Are you going to keep hunting?" You're surprised that it was coming from one of the wolves sitting in front of you. You think his name is Chan, the boy that worked at the motel.

"Truthfully, I might continue hunts here and there. See if they are real threats to others," you tell him.

"My name is Hansol, and are you going to go on hunts alone?"

"Most likely. There aren't many hunters who usually have partners. Most do solo hunts if they can manage them or call for help when they're out of their depth."

Wonwoo frowns at this but doesn't comment from his spot at the bar. The wolf feeling agitated that you would still do dangerous hunts alone and away from him where he couldn't protect you.

Seungcehol nods as he takes in the information before standing and stretching. As he walks out of the room he calls over his shoulder that you're free to stay as long as you please.

Feeling a little out of your element you make your way to Wonwoo. Even though you don't know him well, really at all, there's an odd comfort in being near him.

As you stand by Wonwoo the tall wolf turns and hands you both a plate of eggs and bacon, and you stare for a moment a question bubbling on your tongue. "This might come off rude, but please correct me on this. None of you eat humans, like at all?"

"The name is Mingyu, and no. Not once have any of us tried to eat anyone," Mingyu rolls his eyes but gives you a grin anyway.

"Weird," you mumble, thinking about the things you learned in the past. Maybe things weren't how they always seemed either.

Wonwoo looks at you with a raised brow, "how's that weird?"

"Oh, it's just that most werewolf sighting hunters come across people who have had their hearts removed, most likely eaten. The rest of the body still remains intact and untouched. I just wanted to know if the things in the hunter world aren't what we've all been led to believe," you answer, lifting a fork full of eggs to your mouth.

You hear the boys in the living room gag at that piece of information you just shared.

The blond wolf, Seungkwan shouts from his spot, "We most certainly do not eat hearts!"

You roll your eyes and continue eating in relative silence, the evening finally starting to catch up to you again.

Sensing the tiredness rolling off you, Wonwoo decides that meeting the rest of the pack can't have official introductions after you get so much needed sleep.

"C'mon sleepy, let's get you to bed." He nudges you slightly, just enough to get you to your feet.

You follow Wonwoo back up the stairs and to his room. The idea of sleep sounds very nice, but you wonder if it'll actually come.

"Are you sure this is okay?" You ask, looking at his bed and then back at him.

"Of course I'm sure. I don't offer my bed to just anyone," Wonwoo tells you, a grin tugging at his lips.

"Ha ha very funny mister wolf," Your laugh is dry, but you crawl into bed. Once you're settled you notice that Wonwoo is still standing by the door looking like he's about to leave.

"Could you stay?" Your voice is quiet and unsure.

"Would you like me to?" Wonwoo asks, releasing the doorknob from his grip.

"Please?"

He sits on the edge of the bed before situating himself against the headboard.

He hears a mumbled 'thank you' from you and glances down at you, taking in all of your features.

He notes the slope of your nose, to the apples of your cheeks, and the lashes that brush against them. When he comes to the bandage that plagues your face he frowns imagining the scar that might make a home there.

In the midst of his staring, you startle him. "I can feel you looking at me Wonwoo." You open your eyes and tilt your head so that you're looking at him.

He gives you a sheepish smile but isn't sorry one bit. Instead, he changes the subject. "Can't sleep?"

You hum, "no not really."

"Do you want to talk about it?" He can hear the way you exhale through your nose.

"Just things like this, they keep me from sleeping. Too much going on up here," you bring your hand out of the covers and point to your head. You sit there for a moment before deciding to open up a little more.

"I've been on several hunts where we get there too late, see the damage created by the monster. The stuff doesn't just go away, and now there's this one to add to the collection."

The dejected sigh you let out causes Wonwoo’s heart to squeeze. The mental and emotional damage that your "job" has caused is immense. Maybe it was against his better judgment but he reached for your hand in hopes to comfort you some. Seeing as you didn't pull away he slowly ran his thumb in circles over the back of your hand.

Curiously your eyes met the side of his face. It has been a while since someone had comforted you in such a gentle way: like you were made out of porcelain and glass rather than gunpowder and lead. Closing your eyes you burrowed yourself further under the covers of the blanket, one hand still being held by Wonwoo. It didn't take long for sleep to reach you, but with the warmth radiating off the man next to you, you remained untouched by any nightmares that would normally plague your mind after horrible hunts.

»»————-　➴　————-««

Masterlist

Previous | Next

[mvgnvsvntimvjoris]

All the cool "weirder" asks, which is maybe all of them? I dunno, I trust your judgment on which ones are the cool ones

I am SO SORRY, I read the ask, told myself to answer later the same days and managed to forget for ages ! But here it is, at last !!!

Weird asks, the cool ones ? You trust me too much with cool, I don't know how to identify cool !

I'll answer them all ! Thank you @mxcasual !

1 : Who is / are your comfort character(s) ? At the moment it might be Gale from Baldur's Gate 3 ? I need my escapism and he's a guy I'd geniunely be friend with. We would go to fantasy therapy together and do magic.

2 : Lighter or matches ? : Matches, I need that scratch before it ignites, it's a primal need ! Also I am just bad with lighters...

3 : do you leave the window open at night ? : If it's not too cold, yes, bring me that outside AIR

4 : which cryptyd being do you believe in ? Sadly none ? I wish for mothman tho, they seem pretty cool

5 : what color are your eyes ? Boring blue, YAWN

6 : why did you do that ? I don't know !

7 : hair-ties or scrunchies ? Scrunchies all the way, velvety black ones if possible

8 : how many water bottles are in your room right now ? Two, one empty and one full !

9 : which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee ? I tried both in various combination and I just don't like coffee when it's not in relation to desserts.

10 : would you slaughter the rich ? Yes

11 : favorite extracurricular activity ? Dreaming ?

12 : what kind of day is it ? I thought we were sunday but it's saturday night

13 : when was the last time you ate ? An hour ago, maybe two ?

14 : do you love the smell of earth after it rains ? Yes, and it drives me mad that I've lost my sense of smell years ago (not covid related, way before that).

15 : are you a parent ? Yes, of two cats, I wish I was a better parent to them

16 : can you drive ? Yes, had to !

17 : are you farsighted or nearsighted ? I never remember which one, but I have glasses !

18 : what hair products do you use ? uuuh Shampoo

19 : imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails ? Absolutely, but don't you dare painting mines, I hate the feeling of it, I have to scratch it off really quick

20 : do you say soda or pop ? Neither, here we say the drink's brand and that's it

21 : something you’ve kept since childhood ? Everything I could, but as one exemple a piece of a door handle I broke. Still have it. I like it.

22 : what type of person are you ? I don't know how to describe myself at all, I'm sorry

23 : how do you feel about chilly weather ? I love it but it doesn't and has me on a hit list.

24 : if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing ? Watching the sunset or the stars, either talking or enjoying silence together

25 : perfume/body spray or lotion ? None ? Allergy is a bitch and strong smells are deadly

26 : a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times ? IRL ? Because I'd have to answer : Failing at something

27 : about how many hours of sleep did you get ? Oh no, uh well last night was a mess, got 2 hours and I'm about to explode because of it

28 : do you wear a mask ? Yes

29 : how do you like your shower water ? Not too hot, barely body temperature, just enough

30 : is there dishes in your room ? No !

31 : what type of music keeps you grounded ? Classical, shits make me cry almost all of the time

32 : do you have a favorite towel ? I have one, my own, not really favorite just here to do the job !

33 : the last adventure you’ve been on ? Going to a concert in another country by car, does it count ?

34 : is there a song you know every word to by heart ? Way too many, sometimes I don't even like the song, but it's engraved. I need brain space but the songs won't go

35 : what’s your timezone ? uuuh, CET ? It's 10pm right now

36 : how many times have you changed your url ? I think twice, because I had a christmas one once

37 : someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years ? My oldest friend, went to school together when we were 12 and still being gentle annoyance to each other ! Also I'm pretty sure i have tumblr mutuals who count too

38 : a soap bar that smells good ? I don't know : ( loved lavender

39 : do you use lip balm ? No, can't stand the texture on my lips, has to get rid of it immediately...

40 : did you have any snacks today ? No, but I had two meals ! (little victories)

41 : how do you take your coffee ? I don't

42 : an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site ? Instagram, another godforsaken site

43 : what’s your take on spicy foods ? I like it a lot, my stomach likes it less :o)

44 : you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it ? Uuuh....********* ******

45 : can you remember what happened yesterday ? A bit ? Showed a monsters book to my oldest niece, then I watched her play minecraft while I played Animal Crossing, made dinner, talked with the fam, watched 3 hours documentaries on the weather, then movie critics, then I fell asleep.

46 : favorite holiday film ? I...by default I think Nightmare Before Christmas ? But that's more because I first saw it when I was a kid (like 6 ?), a familly friend gave it to us as a Christmas movie and VHS's opening short film kind of traumatized me ? I love it for halloween now tho

47 : what was the last message you sent ? "La lumière t'attend !"

48 : when did you first try an alcohol beverage ? Well one christmas when I was a child (no idea the age, around 7 ?), family left and I tried to finish a red wine glass, it was disgusting

49 : can you skip rocks ? YES, it's so fun ! Been years !!

50 : can i tag you in random stuff ? Of course !

[louisapennyfeather2021]

PSA for the poor unfortunate souls who may encounter me in the next few weeks.

I've recently discovered Helluva Boss and I will now be quoting my favorite lines for the foreseeable future.

[little-diable]

There's nothing left to save now - Dean Winchester (wincest!smut)

Oh boy, I don't know where this came from. But I love it. Don't like it, don't read it. Enjoy my loves. xxx

Summary: The reader wakes up in a dark room, with her wrists tied together and no recollection of the past hours. But once a familiar face turns up, she can't help but give into his games.

Warnings: 18+, unprotected vaginal sex, wincest, brother x sister, blood play, demon!Dean, degrading, heavy dub!con, knife play, use of blood as a lubricant

Pairing: Demon!Dean x sister!reader (1.7k words)

@spnkinkbingo square filled: Blood Play

The room was dark, (y/n) struggling to get familiar with her surroundings, no longer able to remember what had happened in the past hours. She called out a small “hello”, her throat ached, voice too raspy to properly speak. Only now did she seem to realise that her wrists were tied together, forcing the hunter to sit tight and wait for whoever had brought her here.

The sound of the wind howling outside distracted her, desperately trying to find something that could tell her more about her whereabouts, hoping that she would find a way out of this place. Slowly she could focus on some pieces of old furniture that were standing close, nothing that managed to help her with her questions though.

Somebody was walking towards the room, the sound of boots pounding against the ground echoed through the night, a sound so heavy and dull, (y/n) felt goosebumps rise on her skin. With her breath hitched in her chest she waited for whoever was coming towards the room, not sure if she should pray that a familiar face would appear or if that would make her situation even worse. 

“I was wondering when you’d finally wake up, it’s quite boring around here.” Dean? Her body couldn’t help but relax, at least for a second or two till her mind caught up with the words he had just spoken. Had he brought her here? Tied up his own sister, and for what? “Oh come on, don’t look at me like that, sweetheart.”

“What am I doing here, Dean? Why did you tie me up?” (Y/n) tried to rip herself free once again, a useless try Dean chuckled about. He stepped closer, walking towards her like the eternal judge, about to decide over her fate. “Stop playing games. Sam?” 

“No need to call for Sammy, he’s not here.” Dean crouched down, eye to eye with his frowning sister. Only now did she notice his black eyes, the sinister smile he wore on his lips. Fuck, she hated dealing with demon Dean; a cunt like no other being, more tantalising than any other supernatural creature she was used to fightning. “We’ll have some fun tonight, I’m doing this for you after all. We both know how much you were aching for some alone time with your big brother.” 

“Fuck you, you sick bastard.” She spat at him, watching her saliva drip down his cheeks like tears. And all he did was collect the fluid with his thumb and suck his digit clean, smirk growing wider with every disgusted huff leaving (y/n). He had her trapped, could play any game with her, and she wouldn’t be able to escape. No, she’d break and give in all too easily. 

Dean clicked his tongue, eyes wandering along her features, down her throat, till his gaze came to rest on her cleavage. (Y/n) couldn’t help but curse herself for wearing such a thin shirt, perfectly showing off her upper body. He moved too fast, she wasn’t able to stop him from ripping the fabric apart, exposing her bra clad chest to his dark eyes. 

“You see, this is what you’ve been dreaming about, isn’t it? Late at night when you fuck your tight little cunt, you call for him. And even though you hate yourself for lusting after your big brother, you can’t help but give in over and over again.” His voice dropped lower, raspier than before, a sound that left (y/n) trembling, eyes momentarily fluttering close. In shame, confusion and anger. “Don’t act like you aren’t enjoying this, we both know you are.”

He snapped her bra apart, cupping her naked breasts with his cold hands. Her body was torn between the pleasure his touch evoked - focused on all those times she had touched herself to the thought of Dean - and the disgust that tried to fight the lust. A battle one of those sensations would lose any moment now, body formed into his toy. 

For a second he had her distracted, though as he pulled a knife from his belt, (y/n) felt her body growing stiff, wondering where this was leading them. Slowly Dean ran the blade up her upper body, he pressed it flat against her hardening nipples, eyes set on her face to catch every reaction that crossed her features. A dangerous game her body slowly but surely gave in to. 

Within another second, Dean had cut the rope apart, freeing her from its tight grip. The rough fabric had cut into her skin, drawing blood from her wrists. Her eyes followed his every move, how he moved his fingers to her wounds, collecting the blood with another smirk tugging on his lips. 

“Blood, the elixir of life. Open your mouth.” A command her body blindly followed. Dean pressed his bloody fingers down on her tongue, forcing (y/n) to swallow the iron taste. She gagged, eyes trying to communicate with him, a useless try he ignored. 

Dean didn’t give her any time to react, he picked her up and placed her down on the nearest table, forcing her down onto the surface with his hands guiding her, “Let’s see how tight you truly are, shall we? I can’t wait to see how you’ll take my cock. Put on a brave face, sweetheart, you’re just another whore to soak my cock.” 

“Don’t, please, I can’t.” Her mind was trying to rip herself out of her state, warnings going off like an alarm trying to save her from a natural disaster. But her body wasn’t ready to let go, focused on his touch, a touch she had been dreaming about for years. And even though it was so wrong - on a moral level - it felt all too right. 

“You pathetic little girl. There’s no escaping, not until I believe that you truly don’t want this. There is no use in lying.” He ripped her trousers down her legs, eyes finding hers as he cut her panties apart. With the knife still pressed against his left palm, he guided his right hand to her middle, he cupped her heat, brushed two of his fingers through her slit. Every touch coaxed a moan out of her, eyes rolling back into her head to hold onto the unfamiliar sensation. “There’s nothing left to save now, sweetheart.” 

The next seconds passed by in a blur, he freed his cock, ran his knife along her thigh and cut her open. He did not use enough pressure to force pain through her system, though enough to draw blood from her wound. She didn’t understand what he was doing, could only watch as Dean collected her blood and started pumping his cock with his bloody hand. This was the moment that should have ripped her out of her pleasure drunken state, the moment that should have activated her hunter instincts, but (y/n) didn’t move. 

Dean fucked into her without a warning, blood covered cock buried deep inside of her. She moaned for him, had her fingernails clawed into his shoulders, desperately trying to hold onto him. He fucked her faster than any other man she had ever been with, set on burning this very moment into her mind; a moment that would follow her around even after the demon has eventually left her brother’s body. Forever forced to remember the sinful act she was currently committing. 

“Look at you, you’re begging for your brother’s cock. How pathetic, how wrong of you.” He was toying with her mind, but (y/n) didn’t pay his words any attention, ripped away by the pleasure that consumed her like a cloud of poisonous smoke. No longer did she worry about the lines she kept crossing, no longer did she worry about the what ifs and the consequences that would follow, all she cared about was her nearing orgasm, the sensation that would leave her breathless.

“Fuck, Dean. Feels so good.” Her blood kept trickling from her wounds, covering her wrists and thighs, but (y/n) didn’t feel any pain, didn’t worry about the scars this very moment would leave behind on her body and soul. And the demon version of her brother seemed to enjoy this just as much, his moans and groans echoed through the room, overpowering the storm that kept raging on, louder than the growls Zeus could force through the night, louder than the cries of those being tortured in hell. 

The table rubbed against her back, leaving marks with every ferocious thrust that allowed Dean to bury his cock deeper inside of her. She choked out his name, moved her hand down to her clit and started rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves, desperate for some extra stimulation. Dean’s grip on her wrist grew tighter, forcing his touch into her skin, marks that would taunt her for following days. 

“Cum for your big brother, scream my name.” She followed his command without thinking twice, Dean’s name bled from her lips, eyes fluttering close to relish in the sensation. He fucked her through her high, enjoying the feeling of her walls clamping down on his cock, desperately trying to hold him close. He pulled out of her to relieve himself on her stomach, painting her skin white with his hot cum. Another mess he was leaving behind on her body, not caring about cleaning her trembling frame up. 

(Y/n) could only watch him tuck away his cock, he ran his hand through his hair, and turned away from her. Dean walked towards a window, he pushed the blinds aside and for a moment they were engulfed by nothing but silence.

“Sam will be here soon to take you home, you better come up with a convincing story, sweetheart.”

[kiridarling]

[a/n: is this a week late? yes. happy belated-valentine's day angels <3]

—ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴀɴ 𝟷𝟾+ ʙʟᴏɢ. ᴍɪɴᴏʀs ᴅɴɪ

𝐊𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢 𝐁𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐠𝐨𝐮; 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐇𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐥

→ Definitely went to work that day

→ Not a huge romantic but wake up to find a hot breakfast with a note left on the counter.

Happy Valentines Day, dumbass. Love you.

— k.b

→ When he returns from work, Katsuki buys you roses and shoves them into your chest with an eye roll. You thank him and he responds with a grunt before insisting you put on something nice because he’s taking you out on a dinner date whether you like it or not.

→ Katsuki takes you to the fanciest restaurant—so fancy you feel a little bad that he has to pay, even despite his Pro Hero status. But you’re his, and spoiling you might as well be his love language.

→ Halfway through dinner, Katsuki starts getting a little frisky. Sliding the rough leather of his oxfords up the inside of your thigh, winking and biting his lip. You tell him to stop but you only half-mean it, and the knowing grin on his face lets you know he knows.

"Careful, baby. You don't want the waitress to know how much of a dirty slut you are, do you?”

→ He’s condescending as fuck but you’re totally here for it, and the second he pays for the meal you two are speeding down the highway to a love hotel (per Katsuki’s plan, apparently). You barely make it to the bedroom before you’re all over each other, and if it weren’t for that family of four in the elevator, you definitely wouldn’t have.

→ He tells you to get on the bed and strip, and who are you to deny him of such a luxury? He pulls a plastic black bag out of a different bag—it’s clearly full. With what, you may ask?

→ Sex toys!

→ Katsuki’s endgame is simple—make you cum until you can’t anymore. Not that he’s told you explicitly, but he’s got a Hitachi pressed to your sex and two fingers slamming into you just the way you like it. With your wrists comfortably tied above your head, it doesn’t take him long to bring you to your climax, cheeks burning and thighs shaking.

→ Peering at you under the sweaty mess of ash-blond hair, the fire in Katsuki's eyes only adds fuel to the burning of your gut as the vibrator continues whirr. The realization settles in with a shiver. Oh. Oh fuck, he's not stopping.

“Again.”

→ So, you cum again. And again, and again, and by the time you’re on the fifth it gets a bit hard to feel your toes and you’re so sensitive your thighs burn. All you want is his cock, but for some reason, it’s fucking impossible for him to give it to you.

→ Upon voicing your concerns, Katsuki’s devilish smile only grows wider.

“You want this cock that bad, slut? Yeah? Fine then, fuckin’ choke on it.”

→ It’s basically cannon that one of Katsuki’s favorite things to do is watch you struggle to take all of him, but in this position, all you can do is lay back with bound hands as he fucks your face. It’s sloppy and your eyes and throat burn, but it's totally worth it to hear Katsuki fall apart in your mouth.

“S-So good—fuck—such a good whore, taking all of me, aren’t you?”

→ Katsuki pulls out before he cums in your throat in favor of flipping your limp body into downward dog and stuffing you full of cock in one swift move, the bastard.

→ Katsuki’s never been one to take things slow in bed—to him, it’s all hard and fast and now. You’re scrambling for purchase in the sheets as he pounds into that sweet spot he knows you love, and you feel your fully spent sex twitching back to life anyway. Fuck, fuck. Are you going to cum again?

→ Katsuki seems to catch onto this as well, sweaty chest dropping against your back and the cool of his dog tag tickling your neck as his hand rubs between your legs, muttering dirty nothings in your ear.

“You gonna cum for me, baby? Yeah? Gonna make a fuckin’ mess all over yourself like the slut you are? Fuckin’ do it. Fuckin—fuck—”

→ You two cum at the same time, toes curling and ribcage shuddering, and then—

→ Darkness.

→ You wake up in a few hours, properly clean in fresh sheets. Turns out baby boy fucked you so hard you passed out, but it's okay because he’s found reruns of your favorite show on and is fully prepared with water and snacks.

→ (And he’ll never tell you, but he fully panicked and called Eijirou. Obviously, he knew you were alive, but…what if you passed out because of a problem? A concussion? Internal bleeding, maybe?)

→ (Eijirou ensures him that though this should NOT happen every time, it can happen from exhaustion. To say Katsuki relaxes after that is an understatement.)

(Stay safe angels <3)

And speaking of Eijirou...

𝐄𝐢𝐣𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐮 𝐊𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐚; 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐤𝐞

→ Definitely did not go to work that day.

→ Today, Eijirou plans to treat you like the princess you are. Cooks you breakfast in bed (after almost burning down the kitchen trying to make bacon but shhh we don’t talk about that) books you a full day spa and has Mina take you shopping for a new outfit for your "fancy date" that night.

→ The location? A surprise.

→ It’s dark by the time you and Mina pull up, but the moment you hop out the car she speeds away. Um. She could’ve at least said bye.

"[Y/N?]"

→ Looks like Eijirou brought you to a lake. You wonder who helped him bundle the fairy lights in the trees and set up the picnic because knowing your man and his coordination, it would’ve taken a forever for him to set this up.

→ But all those thoughts shatter the second you see that he’s on his knees, clutching a velvet box with a gorgeous diamond ring sat in the center. Not too flashy, but not too dull.

“U-Uh.”

→ Eijirou swallows then blinks, the only sign that he’s the least bit nervous for this.

“See…I swear I had planned something to say, but you look…holy shit, um—stunning, you look stunning.”

→ His compliment goes over your head though. Of course it does, he’s holding an engagement ring. He chuckles, averting his eyes to the ground.

“Listen, um, you can say no...B-But uh, I love you a lot—obviously—and I’ve been thinking about this a lot, kind of, because you’re like…the love of my life, ya know? I mean, I know everyone says that and everything but like, I really mean it? But if I’m going too fast o-or you just don’t wanna get married or something, I totally get it because obviously this is outta the blue and everything b-but um…yeah.”

→ You let him stutter through the whole thing because, well. It’s cute.

→ ...And then you tackle Eijirou to the ground with renewed passion and slam your lips onto his. His “babe! The ring!” is muffled but you snort anyway, blindly groping for it through the grass. The moment you find it, you shove it into his palm and stick your hand in his face, and with a (very sexy) chuckle, the redhead slides it onto your ring finger.

“I’ll take that as a yes then?”

→ No shit, Sherlock.

→ Either way, the picnic in the dark is abandoned in favor of yanking Eijirou's pants off and giving him the best head of his life. Because goddammit, you love this man so much and he needs to feel it.

→ Afterward, he insists on returning the favor. A wild Gentle Dom Kiri appears and as he eats you out, he mutters a deadly combination of the sweetest and dirtiest things you’ve ever heard.

“Fuck, you feel so good. So tight and wet. And it’s all for me, isn’t it, baby?"

“You’re gonna cum, angel? Do it. Cum all over Daddy’s face.”

→ Once you semi-recover from your orgasm, he flips you on your hands and knees and slowly pushes inside of you (though not without putting on a condom because safety first, angels). You tell him to speed up, but he denies your request. This time around, Eijirou's going to take the time to love you.

→ As he slowly fucks you under the stars, he dips his chin into your neck as his bigger hands encompass your own. As he starts to play with the ring on your finger, you watch something wet hit the picnic blanket, followed by a sniffle.

“Gosh, fuck—I love you so much. A-And I’m really happy you said yes. I…”

→ You cum first and Eijirou isn’t far behind, shuddering against your spine. Your fiancé unceremoniously rolls onto the picnic blanket next to you, his temple kissing the crest of your skull as the two of you use the comfortable silence to cool down, half-naked under the milky way.

→ In your comfortable silence, you lift your left hand to the stars, fingers splayed to reveal the twinkling diamond solidifying the bond between the two of you. Eijirou hums, hooking his chin on your shoulder.

"Pretty, isn't it?"

𝐃𝐞𝐧𝐤𝐢 𝐊𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐢; 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐀𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐃𝐚𝐲

→ Both of you are painfully single and most importantly, strangers. Strangers who think alike and had the glorious forethought to drown your sorrows at a nightclub with a lot of alcohol.

→ Denki, as he does, accidentally knocks over his liquor-filled cup, completely drenching your bottoms. He apologizes and insists on helping you clean up though getting awfully close to your crotch, but both of you are too tipsy to notice.

→ After the liquor spill, you swap embarrassing love stories and lament over the “hardships of being single.” (Denki’s words.)

→ A few hours pass. You’re tired and ready to go home and Denki requests to walk you home to make sure you get back safely. Not that you live far, maybe ten minutes, but by the time you reach your door, you feel like you've known the electric blond your whole life. After saying goodbye and almost closing the door, Denki blurts out a half-drunken confession...or something like that:

“I—uh, y-you are—uhm, no…this is—“

→ You give him a look, a half-smile at best, and it seems to churn the gears in his brain again.

“This was uhm, really fun and uh, I think you’re really cool.”

→ So naturally, when you invite him inside, he squeals.

→ After a few more drinks and a few more spillages (Denki’s never been a deft drunk), you two finally get over your inner thoughts and start kissing on the couch. It’s hot and messy, and the alcohol in your veins makes it oh, so hot.

→ Denki doesn’t expect you to offer head but when you do he nearly cries, scrambling to pull his pants off while you make space for yourself between his thighs.  Due to the fact that there’s alcohol pumping in Denki’s veins and he hasn't been touched by someone else in at least a year, he’s extra-sensitive. And vocal. 

"F-Fuck gorgeous, you're so good at this...o-oh shit, do that again—yeah, yeah just like that."

→ His hips quiver, and he bucks into your mouth on accident. It earns him a glare and a light slap on the thigh, and you make a mental note to unpack the broken moan that interrupts his apology later. 

→ It doesn't take Denki a long time to cum—five minutes max. He plans to give you a warning but his orgasm runs up on the electric blond so quickly he doesn't even get a warning. When Denki orgasms in your mouth with a choked moan, it's only natural that you pull away in alarm, ribbons of semi-translucent cum flying just about everywhere.

→ To say you're pissed is an understatement (because your poor, poor carpet), but Denki feels terrible and is already reaching for the roll of paper towels you left on the coffee table from your cleaning spree this morning, apologies flying out of his mouth like an auctioneer.

→ Obviously, he's going to make it up to you. Not only for making an absolute mess in your living room (seriously, Denki doesn't know if he's ever come that much in his life) but for the bomb head, and he wants to make you feel just as good as you made him feel.

→ Both of you stumble to your room, the mood miraculously rekindled, and you're not sure what to make of Denki's desperation as he claws at your bottoms, pupils blown to the size of dinner plates. And though it's cheesy, you can't help but shiver when he finally gets eyes on your sex, wetting his bottom lip and the grip around your thigh tightening as he catcalls the apex between your thighs before diving in.

"Hello pretty~"

→ Like any pervert with a vivid imagination, Denki's got a mental warehouse of sex tips and tricks and burns to watch you squirm from his touch. He wants you red-faced and breathless and isn’t shy about it, actively paying attention to your reactions when he curls his fingers or uses his tongue just right.

"Oh, you taste so good sweet thing. So pretty and wet...did I do all this, gorgeous?”

→ Also, electro-stimulation? Yes please.

→ Denki's tentative about it at first because he’s not sure how you’ll react, but once you give him that pretty little moan you've been holding back all evening, you two are going nowhere but hell.

→ His dick hurts from being hard for so long and the second you cum, he’s practically begging to fuck you.

“Please? Please gorgeous? Shit, you felt so good in my mouth I just wanna—I need to—please?”

→ Like you needed any convincing in the first place.

→ You ride him per his request—and will definitely make you repeat things back to him, just because he likes how embarrassed and blushy you get. If you refuse? He’ll be an absolute tease about it. (But only for a bit, because we all know his patience isn’t that great.)

"Yeah? You like this cock? Tell me. Tell me how good my cock makes you feel, gorgeous."

→ There's no way Denki lasts very long (again)—definitely with you in his lap. When he cums, it’s cute and breathless, and his nose scrunches into his eyes. But if he came twice, you should too right?

→ The next morning, Denki's gone. But in his place, there’s a note with his number and an explanation:

had to go to work! lol i have the fattest hangover kill me now ty. either way, you should text me. i wasn't kidding when i said i thought you were cool lol.

(xxx)-xxx-xxxx

— kaminari

[a/n: gah XD my brain melted from writing that um-

also don’t worry about the family of four at the love hotel...they were...um...forced to stay there due to an emergency...lol :) see you soon, angels <3]

[joyfulhopelox]

Strawberries & Cigarettes

Pairing: Jungkook x reader (Soulmate!AU)

Genre: angst, fluff

Warnings: mentions of sex (once), swear words, talks about death of minor character, mentions of smoking (don't do it kids)

Summary: As a child you detested strawberries, convincing yourself that you have an allergy to them. But imagine your shock when you grow up and realise that your soulmate connection has to do with the wretched berry.

Word count: 7.7k

rating : pg

A/N: This is square 4/25 for the @bangtanwritingbingo (Square: Strawberries) I have not written something remotely angsty in a while so this has been a challenge but i did it! And i am somewhat proud of it! Thank you @mochi-molala @sunshinejunghoseokie for listening to me complain about this it has been a journey. And most importantly, thank you @min-yoon-kween for being a beta queen and trying to read through this mess and managing to make 3am rambles onto words. I really appreciated all the support and tough love! @yoonjinkooked, @sunshinekims and @yoonia thank you for being there and listening to my 3am complaints whilst i was getting this done, your encouragement has been a massive help!

Copyrights @joyfulhopelox for both the work and the banner

As always please leave feedback and/or talk to me as i love to hear from you! Enjoy <3

The sweet, fragrant, slightly tart taste invades your senses once again causing you to sigh in frustration. How are you meant to find your soulmate if this unknown taste is all you have to go by? You couldn’t even pinpoint what it could be, the flavour being unlike anything that has ever touched your tastebuds.

“For real now Y/N, what do you have against fruit?” Your friend, Taehyung, inquires. You’ve adamantly refused his offer to share a fruit snack. It’s not like you had anything against fruit, far from it. You loved fruit. It was just the wretched strawberries lying there innocently on the bed of other berries, tainting them.

“It’s not fruit! I love fruit, you know that! Remember that time we snuck out into your grandfather's garden to steal apricots?” Your friend snorts. He remembers that time extremely well. You ate way more than you should have and ended up with indigestion for days after that.

“It’s just…” you grimace, looking once more at the red offenders. “Those”

“Strawberries?!” It was Taehyung’s turn to grimace. “How can you still hate strawberries after all this time? They are the best berry out there!” As if to prove his point he reaches for one and pops it in his mouth. You look away in disgust. “Oh come on Y/N, give them a try. You never know, you may like them now.” He pushed one towards you. Glaring at him, you rejected his offer.

“Tae, you know I can't! It’s not that I don't like them, I am allergic to them!” He responded with an incredulous look but didn’t say anything. Reading too much into his look you go to defend yourself. “I am! Since I was a child!”

“How do you know?” He raised an eyebrow at you. Shrugging, you tried to find a good answer.

Truth is, you didn’t know whether or not you were allergic to them. All you had was a bad memory from when you were a child. You had a very bad encounter with said berries. It was not a near death experience by any means, and it was not an allergic reaction. You were just a child, excited at the thought of trying a new fruit and so in your exhilaration you shoved it a bit too readily in your mouth. The innocent berry happened to go down the wrong pipe and causing you to choke and your family to panic. Ever since then you had sworn to never touch them again, telling everyone around you that you were allergic. That way you didn’t have to face the shame of retelling this childhood story and they couldn’t try forcing you to eat them.

It happened so long ago that you couldn’t even remember the taste. You couldn’t understand why everyone around you seemed to find them so delicious.

“I- just do ok? I had a bad reaction to them a long time ago, and I don’t want a repeat experience” you shrugged hoping that he would not catch onto the white lie you had just blatantly presented to his face. Side eyeing you suspiciously, Taehyung made sure to eat the strawberry he had picked up, sighing in the most dramatic way possible.

“Well then, more for me” his mouth was so full you could barely understand him. Disgusted you pushed his shoulder playfully. “Ew, that is bad manners. Did your mother not teach you to chew with your mouth closed?”

Taehyung pretended to look thoughtful whilst still chewing. “Nope, now take a blueberry and shut up” he pushed the assortment of fruit your way once again, this time making sure that the strawberries were out of your sight.

“Thanks Tae” you smiled gratefully at him, picking a blueberry out. Before it could reach your mouth, a loud thump resounded from next to you making you jump. Surprised your fingers let go of the blueberry you were holding so preciously.

“Oh man, don’t waste food!” a voice you recognised all too well spoke, whilst a hand made its way past your face and into the bowl of fruit Taehyung had so carefully prepared for the two of you. Long slender fingers wrapped themselves around the green stem of a strawberry. You followed the movement of the hand holding the strawberry to come face to face with the culprit.

“Hello to you too, Jungkook” Taehyung sighs, his smile instantly dropping. “What brings you here?” His deadpan expression was a good indication of how happy he was to see him.

“Uh, it’s lunchtime?” Jungkook looked at Taehyung as if he had grown a second head. “Is this not where we are supposed to eat lunch?” disposing of the green stem of the strawberry, he pops it in his mouth. You wanted to grimace, you had enough of Taehyung making a scene whilst eating that damned fruit. Now you are forced to witness the office heartthrob lick his fingers clean of the fruit juice that coated them. Simultaneously expelling a moan so sinful it was definitely not appropriate for office hours. You doubted it was healthy for your heart.

“Yes, but you guys in the graphics team have a separate kitchen. You know, the one you took from us last year? The big fancy one?” Taehyung was still bitter about that incident. It had been his favourite break room to spend time in. The room was spacious and had more than just a few tables scattered here and there, divided by a couple of couches where employees could lounge during their break. There was also a terrace with a lot more space and a pool table. Most importantly,Taehyung’s pride and joy, a gaming room. He would get lost in there during his break, and sometimes even after work until you would come and retrieve him worried for his health.

That is where he met Jungkook, and that is where he ruined your life by introducing you to said office heartthrob. At the time your department and his rarely interacted outside of company meetings. You were working as a business analyst and he was working as a graphics developer. Your jobs could not have been more different from each other.

Truth be told, you had seen Jungkook around the building on more than one occasion. You had the chance to speak once at a company gala in a drunken haze, where you realised you had a lot of interests in common. But you only got to know him the second time you bumped into him, when Taehyung decided to introduce you two. His handshake and shy presentation told you he was too drunk to remember talking to you that night so you did not mention it either.

Once you’ve been introduced, his presence turned into one of the ones you sought out during lunch breaks, you became more aware of the rumours flying around the company. Out of all of them the ones you heard the most were about him and his love for “dining and dashing” all the women he had taken out on a date.

Normally, you wouldn’t be the person to listen to such rumours and allow them to sway your opinion of someone. But you had witnessed on one occasion how he had indeed left a woman in the middle of a restaurant and fled the scene. After that you wondered if maybe you should be more weary of him and his bad habits.

Talking to him in person was a completely different story. He seemed incredibly shy at the beginning, it took him a couple of weeks to be able to look you in the eyes. Taehyung would laugh and say it is because he had a crush on you but you doubted that. How could you believe that? Not when you lived in a world where lovers were predestined. You were born with a bond that tied you to someone else, a bond that's unbreakable. Your soulmate was made for you and only you. You could have other lovers until you found your true one, you have seen it happen on multiple occasions but once you found your soulmate and that bond was complete you couldn’t be apart from them.

Soulmates, a subject that ruined your life as soon as you became aware of it. At the age of ten you found out that all humans on this planet have a person they are meant to be with forever. A person that is yours, and only yours. At such a young age you fell in love with the concept. Fairies and princesses in the stories your parents would read you before bed, they all had their one true love. When you found out that you were meant to have one true love, a soulmate, you were beyond ecstatic. For years after, it was all you talked about and all you dreamt about. It all came crashing down when one rainy night your father had a car accident on his way home from work. The crash took a parental figure away from you. Aside from having had to deal with the pain of losing your hero, you also went through the misery of witnessing the painful heartbreak that comes with having a soulmate.

Your mother mourned for days, she could not eat or sleep, she withered right in front of your eyes. It was heartbreaking to experience your only remaining parent destroying themselves right before your eyes. You were only sixteen at the time and could not do anything to help alleviate the pain she was going through. So you helplessly stood at her side for another three years until one day, her soul finally gave up.

Her funeral was a relief for you, it meant she didn’t have to struggle anymore. The pain was gone. So, at the age of nineteen, you became an orphan.

Turning twenty and a struggling pen pusher, you met Taehyung in a cafe. You crashed into him soaking his expensive suit in coffee as you rushed out the door, late for work. Apologising profusely and promising to pay for his dry cleaning you gave him your number. That was the first time you had hit a stroke of good luck in years. Later that day, when a text came through from an unknown number you expected it to be an extortionate dry cleaning bill. Instead all that was written was: ‘Coffee’s on me next time (not literally though) haha.’ You couldn’t help but laugh, he gave you a place and time and signed it with Taehyung. That had been the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

For the first few years of your friendship you’d wondered if he was your soulmate; and so, despite your aversion to the concept, you two started dating. It was difficult not to like him, he was good looking and you two seemed to have a lot in common. It didn’t help that the sex was also great, you had to admit he knew what he was doing. But after one too many nights of netflix and takeaways at his apartment, which ended in his bed, you both decided that you were not the one for each other. So, two years into your relationship you separated. Fortunately, the friendship you two forged remained, your bond stronger than before. At the age of twenty three, you moved in together as housemates. It was the most logical thing to do, you were attached at the hip anyway and rent was too expensive for a single person to bear. Twenty four came and went, stressed and always low on money, when luck struck you for a second time the day Taehyung told you a position had opened in his team. You decided to apply and rejoiced when you got the job offer. That night you and Taehyung celebrated with pizza and champagne.

Here you are three years later having worked in the same company, being promoted from a trainee to a junior business analyst, and life couldn’t have been better.

There was one thing that bothered you, and that was the strange taste in your mouth that you had begun to notice. At first it was so faint that you didn’t notice it. As time passed, it got stronger and stronger, until you could not ignore the slight tangy, sweet taste that lingered on the tip of your tongue. It wasn’t a bad taste, in fact you quite liked it. You were just annoyed at the fact that you could not place it. You tried multiple foods which you thought may have a similar taste but none of them satisfied that craving. You hid this information from Taehyung for a while, not wanting to make a big fuss out of it until the day he found you rummaging through the fridge mumbling to yourself.

“What are you doing Y/N?” he stood in the doorway confused as to why your head was buried deep into the fridge. You jumped not having heard him move into the kitchen and looked at him in surprise. The sight that greeted him was something he was not expecting. The hilarity of your wide eyed expression paired with the cheeks stuffed full of cherries made him double over in laughter.

Mumbling something akin to “stop laughing at me, i had a craving” you stood up and walked to the table dejectedly plopping yourself down on a chair. Taehyung sobered immediately noticing the forlorn expression on your face and whilst still wiping the tears from his eyes he approached you and sat down. “What’s up chipmunk?” he could not resist making a jab at you. Sighing you started picking at a stray thread off your sleeve. You decided it was time to tell him what has been bothering you for months, despite fearing his judgement.

“Have you ever had cravings?” you turn to look at him, your expression so innocent that he could not make fun of you for such a trivial question. “Of course I have! All the damn time” he scoffed at you.

“No, no what I mean is; have you ever had a taste at the tip of your tongue, on your lips something that isn’t what you have eaten that day, but it is there continuously lingering in your mouth?” the more you were explaining this out loud the stupider you felt. Your own words were confusing even to you. But it seemed like Taehyung knew what you meant because in an instant he jumped up from his seat and looked at you wide eyed.

“Y/N!” the grin on his face intensified. “Do you know what this means?” he grabbed your shoulders in excitement. “It means that you have found your soulmate!” your eyes widened in fear, your body stiffened under his hold. Realising what he’d said, and how you felt about soulmates he backtracked quickly. “Nonono, it means you are close to finding your soulmate. It means you have met them at last!” When your frozen body refused to move he realised that maybe that was not the best way to phrase it either. But the damage has already been done. Wide eyed, you flew off the chair and rushed out of the kitchen towards your own room, slamming the door in the process.

You called in sick the next day, and the day after, not leaving your room until you were certain Taehyung had left for work. He tried on multiple occasions to coax you out of your room, but to no avail. You stubbornly refused to acknowledge him. Mulling over your thoughts in the comfort of your room, conflicted at the realisation that he was right. You had met your soulmate, just not completed the bond yet.

“Y/N, are you ok?” the worry in his voice broke your heart, but you were too absorbed in your own thoughts to respond to him.

Memories of your parents, together and apart, thoughts of your mother and her suffering, memories of you together as a happy family all swirling around in your head. It was all too much to bear, and in the end your brain gave up exhausted, only to wake up the next day and start all over again. For a week you stayed in your room, but when Taehyung decided that enough was enough he formulated a plan in his head hoping it would get you out of your room. If you refused to come out for him, he would have to resort to other methods. He would invite people over, he knew you would not be able to resist the temptation of being a good host. So that day he called your colleague and his friend, Jungkook.

Later on that night, you laid in bed, thoughts ruminating through your head at a fast pace when you heard voices from the entrance. You could easily recognise Taehyung’s voice, the low timbre echoing through the house. It was the second voice that you could not pinpoint, and so, intrigued you got off the bed.

Your joints ached, having sat in the same position for so long and your head hurt from exhaustion. You knew you probably looked like a mess but curiosity was eating at your insides. So you took the chance and opened the door slightly trying to peek into the corridor. Unfortunately, your room was the first along the corridor, right around the corner from the kitchen. The kitchen where Taehyung and his mysterious companion were now exiting from. Your delayed reaction ended up with them coming around the corner almost bumping into you. Gasping, your eyes took in the unknown person whose voice drew you out of your miserable state.

“Jungkook '' you yelped. Startled at the intrusion, you slammed the door in their faces, your back now leaning against the door. You didn’t ponder too much on Jungkook’s shocked expression or Taehyung’s pleased one. Your heart was pounding, and for a second the blood rush from the adrenaline made your ears ring and your lips tingle. You were so focused on your embarrassment that you didn’t even notice the lingering sweet taste residing on your tongue.

Sliding against the door to keep yourself from falling you tried to regulate your heartbeat by taking a few deep breaths in. After a few moments, your eyes opened and took in the darkness of your room. Deciding that you were calm enough you got up, your legs slightly wobbly from crouching for so long. Turning on the light you looked at yourself in the mirror. Your hair was in disarray, your skin looked dull and the red that rimmed your eyes accentuated the eyebags under them. Grimacing at your appearance, you patted your hair trying to make it look more presentable only to give up after a few minutes. Throwing another worried glance at your door, as if you were expecting the boys to barge in at any moment, you contemplated going out there. You sighed deciding that you didn’t care if Jungkook would think you were impolite, you were not ready to face the world.

For the next couple of hours you tried to distract yourself from your thoughts accompanied by the loud hollers coming from the living room where the boys were playing video games. Too absorbed in your own thoughts you didn’t realise how late it had gotten, the rumbling of your stomach waking you up from your trance.

Opening the door you listened intently but there were no sounds coming from the living room. You assumed the boys had finally fallen asleep do as quietly as you could you tiptoed to the kitchen. The corridor was dark, the only light coming from the TV in the living room where you assumed the boys had passed out. Turning on the light in the kitchen you contemplated stealing Taehyung’s last pack of ramen when a voice from behind startled you.

“What are you doing?” you yelped, not having expected to have company.

Jungkook stood in the middle of the doorway, his eyes bleary with sleep, his hair poofed up and judging by the groggy voice, still half asleep. You tried to ignore the way your heart somersaulted at the sight of his messy hair, the way his hooded eyes were blinking sleepily at you and the way his small yawn made him resemble a rabbit. He was adorable and for a second you entertained the thought of telling him that.

“Food” was all you finally replied, secretly trying to fix your messy appearance. Jungkook hummed in acknowledgment. You looked away trying to ignore his eyes on you. The silence that followed was awkward, neither of you knew what to say. “Uh, I don’t know if that rascal fed you but uh….would you like some ramen?” you stuttered trying to break the awkwardness. His stomach growled as if prepared for your question. You stared at him in shock for a couple of seconds before you burst into laughter.

Jungkook smiled at you bashfully, too embarrassed to respond so you took it upon yourself and pulled another chair out for him to sit in.

The silence that ensued was comforting, neither you nor Jungkook feeling the need to interrupt it with small talk. You observed amusedly the way his eyes seemed to lighten up at the sight of food, the way the corner of them would crinkle in excitement and the small satisfied sounds at the food gracing his taste buds was something you found adorable.

The feeling of contentment that enveloped you was entirely new. As the calmness washed over you, you realised it felt like coming home. Not knowing what to make of it you continued to stare at Jungkook, hoping that the answers were hidden somewhere in his smile. Catching you stare at him mid bite Jungkook stopped and tilted his head in confusion.

“Is there something on my face?” realising you were staring at him for a bit too long you squeaked in embarrassment.

“Ah, no no no I was just lost in thought.” Hoping he would buy that excuse, you offered him a bright smile.

Jungkook had known you were staring at him, and for a brief second, along with the spiciness of the noodles burning his tongue, he felt something smoky intertwine. He wondered if it was the food, but the taste was too distinct. In an instant he could place it, the taste of cigarettes. It was faint but he recognised instantly that ashy fragrance. He wondered if his soulmate was a smoker and if so why would the taste bother him now?

He found out about the soulmate connection years ago and how he was meant to figure out which person was meant for him. Meeting your soulmate was supposed to trigger a taste that was only attributed to them. His trigger happened a few years ago when he started working for the company. To say he was excited was an understatement. He has dreamt of meeting his soulmate for so long and to know that they were in proximity was exhilarating.

In his naive search for them he decided to accept all the requests he has gotten from his colleagues to go on dates. Unfortunately for him, he realised too late that it was not the way to find the one that was meant to be for you. Just like the concept of a soulmate, if it was meant to happen, it would happen. He realised too late and after too many failed dates that he could not rush the process. So he stopped trying. Until that one day when he saw you on the roof of the building, during lunch time. You had no idea that you were not alone, had you been aware of that fact you may have not gotten out your pack of cigarettes. Jungkook could tell by the way your foot tapped the ground impatiently and the way your hands kept grabbing at your hair that you were stressed. He sat in silence not wanting to disturb you as you seemed to be hyping yourself up about something. You didn’t interact that day, but in his head he knew he had found you. The taste of cigarettes on his lips was as strong as the smell wafting through the air.

Normally he would not have been happy about someone who smoked in his vicinity, the harsh smell causing his nose to tingle in an unpleasant fashion. Watching you stress smoke that cigarette with the knowledge that you were his soulmate he found himself unbothered by that knowledge. He knew who you were, your mutual friend being Taehyung. He had introduced you two as soon as you started working for the company.

He will always remember that specific moment, the time when you smiled shyly at him extending your hand. He felt an unusual warmth all throughout his body, but he didn’t realise at the time it was your soulmate bond tying itself together like the ends of two loose strings.

He tried with all his might to figure out whether or not you had the faintest idea about your soulmate connection and for a few months he would insist on taking his break on the floor below just so he could spend time with you. Your lack of interest towards him and his advances told him that you were oblivious. You weren’t treating him differently than you would treat Taehyung and for a while he questioned himself. What if he had been wrong? Instead of keeping up appearances, he let himself slip into the friend's mould. If he had been wrong then it would spare him the embarrassment, if he hadn’t been wrong then it would do him no harm to be friends first.

The memories still fresh in his mind he knew now that you were his soulmate. Still a bit tipsy from the wine he had shared with Taehyung earlier he plucked up the courage and jokingly asked, “Is it because I am handsome?” The shocked look on your face and the silence that ensued were far from comfortable. Slowly Jungkook could feel the heat of the blood rushing to his face and he tried his best to hide his embarrassment with a cough. “I mean-“

At the sight of his wide eyes and red cheeks you started chuckling, not being able to hold your composure for any longer. “It was bad, but you’re adorable.” This time your face turned beet red. You both looked at each other like deer caught into headlights for a few moments, only to dissolve into laughter once again.

That night you talked to Jungkook as if he was an old friend. It felt comfortable to share stories with him, to laugh and to make jokes. It felt good to be out of your head for once. The worries that had plagued your mind completely dissolved in between the laughter and the wine that you were sharing.

At some point during the night you both moved into the corridor in front of your room, both sat on the floor, your back leaning against the wall. Passing the wine bottle in between the two of you the conversation carried on into the darkness of the corridor. The only available source of light coming from the kitchen dimly lighting both of your faces, casting shadows across the floor. You didn’t know when you got so close to him, your skin prickling at the heat emanating from his body. Or when your head dropped onto his broad shoulder, your eyes fluttering, heavy with sleep.

“Y/N” Jungkook whispered and you hummed in response. The familiarity of the scene made him smile. You looked adorable, cuddled into his side, your eyes laden with sleep.

“What if I were to tell you I found my soulmate?” His voice was fearful but his heart was hopeful.

Wide awake now, your head snapped up. “What?”

Even though it was meant to be a whisper your voice reverberated through the corridor. Gasping you stopped to listen for any signs of Taehyung waking up. When the corridor stayed silent you breathed a sigh of relief and cleared your throat. “What?” you looked alarmed at Jungkook.

“Is it that bad? That I found my soulmate?” he looked wounded and you quickly tried to clarify. “Nonono, definitely not bad, just...i am surprised” you looked hesitant. You didn’t know what to make of that information, on one hand you wanted to be happy for him. Not everyone thought like you about the soulmate bond. On the other hand you couldn’t fathom the idea that he may have found his intended love in life. The pain blossomed in your chest and you readily assumed the reason behind that being your aversion towards the concept.

“But what if….” Jungkook stopped. He looked unsure of himself and something pulled at your heartstrings. In an attempt to comfort him you placed your hand on his grasping it gently.

“What if, the soulmate doesn’t want me” he tried again, his voice meek. You gave him a sympathetic look, in a way you could relate to his worries. “There is no way your soulmate wouldn’t want you” you tried to ease his worries, your hand subconsciously tightening its grip on his. Jungkook didn’t respond looking lost in thought and for a moment you thought you had said the wrong thing when you felt his fingers intertwined with yours. The feel of his warmth combined with the softness of his hands cause butterflies to erupt in your stomach. The feeling so foreign to you, but not unwelcome.

“But what if I said my soulmate was you?” he tried again, his grip tightening, as if he was afraid you might slip through his fingers. Your heart stopped, your mind trying to catch up with his words. Taking the risk, Jungkook slowly cupped your face. Leaning towards you until your lips were only one whisper away he stopped. His warm breath fanning over your face, it smelt sweet, tangy. Before you could process your thoughts bumped his lips onto yours in a timid touch. Once, twice, three times, his lips ghosted over yours.

You could not react, the surprise from his confession still wrecking havoc through your body. Your eyes fluttered closed as you felt his soft lips touch yours with a bit more conviction. You almost allowed yourself to melt into the kiss a small moan leaving the back of your throat. He tasted sweet, just like...you could not place the taste, and yet it seemed so familiar.

You jolted out of the trance pulling away from him entirely, almost sliding yourself on the opposite side of the corridor. Like a deer in headlights you observed his every move, ready to flee the scene if he got too close to you. “Y/N”, Jungkook tried to reach a hand towards you. You flinched away from him and he halted. You looked scared of him. He could feel his heart break in two at the sight of your distress.

“Y/N” he tried again but you would not have it. You were unable to listen to any reasoning, your fight or flight reaction at an all time high. “Please go” you managed to utter.

When he tried to approach you again you let out a sob, the emotions of your revelations catching up with you. “Please” you pleaded, looking at him in despair. Jungkook’s heart dropped. The look on your face told him you wanted him gone, and as much as it hurt him he would listen to you.

Giving you one last pained look he turned around on his heels and walked down the corridor, swallowed by the darkness of the apartment. When with a click of the front door you knew he was gone, and you broke down in tears.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?” Taehyung, fully awake, having heard the front door close and your sobs echoing through the apartment, rushed to your side.

“I fucked up” was the only thing you could mutter over and over again. Taehyung was confused. Looking around him trying to find something that may indicate the reason for your cries, he spotted the wine bottle by your leg. Alarmed, he picked it up. “Fresh notes of strawberries”....

“Y/N are you daft? This has strawberries in it!” he tried to pry your hands away from your face to check for any signs of swelling. Your incessant cries lessened at that. Taehyung could barely discern what you were saying and so instead, he hugged you tightly to his chest letting you cry it out.

“I think I know the taste that has been bugging me” a couple of days after that night, you were in the break room with Taehyung prepared to have your lunch break. You had been successful at avoiding Jungkook, and you had a strong suspicion that he had stayed out of your way on purpose. That lessened your worries, you didn’t know if you would be able to confront him about what had transpired between the two of you.

“Really? What, when and how?” you could tell Taehyung was trying to hide his excitement underneath his grin. You refused to give him more information on the subject, not yet ready to talk about it. But if you underestimated something, it was his ability to put two and two together. “Is it Jungkook?” you stopped dead in your tracks, your heartbeat picking up the pace. At your reaction Taehyung almost grinned, he was happy his two friends had discovered each other. His grin faltered at something behind you.

You tried denying it, telling him he was mistaken. but with the sweet taste of strawberries lingering on your lips, even you knew that there was no mistake.

“Uhh, Y/N, I have to rush, I forgot that I needed to send some documents over” he quickly got up and rushed out of the room. Your bewildered eyes followed his retreat only to come across the man that had just entered the break room. You gasped at the sight of his athletic frame dressed in the dark coloured suit he normally wore for work. He looked handsome.

“Jungkook” you acknowledged him with a nod. He stood there looking at you for a moment, a strange look on his face as if he was prepared to say something but then changed his mind at the last minute. Instead he mirrored your nod and headed towards the coffee machine.

He passed by you in an attempt to reach for the pods that were on the table behind you. To get to them he had to step around your still body. You could not move, still in a daze, your lips tingling from the kiss you two have shared earlier. Your hands were trembling and you tried your hardest to stay calm and not give away the mixed feelings raging through your body. You cleared your throat and looked away in an attempt to hide your blushing face from him. Jungkook took you in silently, he didn’t know what to make of your reaction. Earlier when he had kissed you, your lips moulding together, you pressed tightly against his form, hands raking through his hair. You seemed to be reciprocating the feeling but now, when you were acting like a deer caught in headlights, he was not so sure of himself anymore.

Cautiously he approached you, his gaze unfaltering, he was afraid that if he stepped over the line you would run away from him again. He didn’t know if his heart could take it.

He couldn’t imagine that if you’d figured it out you’d react to him like this. He was waiting for you to realise it was him. However, the blank look on your face and your stiff posture told him otherwise. The soulmate connection urged him to take you in his arms and take the pain away, to make it better. But you didn’t know yet it was him, and he debated whether or not he should tell you. His heart lurched in pain, he didn’t know how to approach the issue. Knowing himself he’d make a stupid comment which would drive you further away. So he settled for actions rather than words.

It felt like an eternity until he reached you, toe to toe, his hand hesitantly cupped your face. You couldn’t move, your breath coming into short pants, your heart flipping inside your chest. For a second you feared you would faint, but the warm touch of his hand kept you grounded and so you focused on that. Closing your eyes you leaned your head onto his hand soaking up the comfort. Even though you were apprehensive about Jungkook and your connection, he has been nothing but kind and understanding to you. His awkward demeanour paired with his confident looks, an endearing combination in your eyes. After that night you two spent together in the corridor of your apartment you understood very well why most women in your company fell in love with him. What you didn’t understand though, was why he would break their hearts like that. Thinking about the rumours once again your eyes snapped open and you pushed his hand away.

“Jungkook,” you cleared your throat. You needed to get your feelings off your chest otherwise you would implode. You wanted to make sure you were both on the same page. You didn’t want to end up heartbroken like any of the other women in the office. Your stomach lurched at that, the thought of him rejecting you like he did those women sending shooting pains through your whole body.

Jungkook’s hands stayed a few centimeters away from your face, his face morphing into anguish. But as soon as it appeared, it was instantly gone, replaced by a smile, the same heartfelt smile he gave you the day you met. The day you had signed your fate. The day the taste of what you could place now as strawberries had invaded your tastebuds. He waited for you to say something, he was not going to push you, but his gentle eyes told you he was going to listen to whatever you decided to tell him. Taking a deep breath in you decided to continue.

“I- am not sure how to put this into words, so I am going to just come out with it.” tears pooled into your eyes at the thought of what you were going to say. He nodded but you could tell he was anxious by the way his hand helplessly dropped to his side and started fiddling with his pants. You blinked the tears away but they just kept coming leaving a hot trail down your face. The pain of losing your parents resurfacing at the memories flooding your head.

“My parents, they uh, died” you stumbled over your words, finding it very difficult to get a grasp over your emotions. You took Jungkook’s silence as a sign to carry on, “my dad passed away in a car accident, after that, my mother she uh” a sob wrecked through your body and you couldn’t carry on. Watching as your whole body broke down in front of him Jungkook decided to throw caution out the window and steadily wrapped his arms around you. In an instant you relaxed, the warmth and the comfort provided by your soulmate embracing you calmed you down enough for you to carry on with your story.

“My mother, she died heartbroken three years after my father” you sniffled embarrassed at the snot you could see on his shirt. Trying to pull yourself away from him you found yourself nose to chest with him as he tightened his grip on you. You didn’t have the strength to fight against his hold.

“Jungkook,” you pleaded, slumping against him, your forehead resting on his warm chest. In that position you could hear his heartbeat, the strong thump reverberating through you. The knowledge that you were about to break that rhythm pained you. “I don’t want to have a soulmate.” A fresh wave of tears soaked through his shirt. Jungkook felt as if your sobs had not only penetrated the material but also his heart, the coldness that gripped him rendering him speechless.

Despite the unbearable ache that your words have caused him, he remembered that you were also suffering. He decided that his pain was irrelevant to yours, the soulmate bond that forged between the two of you pushing him to alleviate your sorrow and forget about his own.

“Y/N” his voice sounded foreign to him, the anguish seeping through. He cleared his throat and tightened his grip on you, trapping your arms in between the two of you. You knew you were being selfish, your hard words chipping away at his heart. Despite that he was being patient and understanding, lending you the last of his strength. “Don’t, please” was his last attempt at asking you not to crush him. A plea followed by a soft kiss on the top of your head, his own tears threatening to spill down his cheeks.

His words pierced through you, a heavy feeling settling in your chest. It felt as if someone had placed a weighted lead over your heart. Your mind was fighting against the soul’s desire to mould together as one, to form that bond fully. But by doing so, you were fighting against the laws of the soulmate connection, the broken promise of being together forever caused you to feel agony like never before. Desperate, you managed to free your hands and wrap them around him, your fingers digging into the muscles of his back in an attempt to steady yourself. You let the pain course through you, letting Jungkook’s soft cries in your hair be a reminder of your self-serving fears. His breath was hot on the crown of your hair, his breath coming out in broken gasps and you finally understood.

This is what your mother had experienced. This is the pain she must have gone through when your father was gone. Only, you were voluntarily putting yourself and him through it.

You felt despicable, but most importantly, you were terrified. Thoughts running through your head, scenarios in which you and him were bonded and living a happy life, only for it to be swept from under you. You didn’t think you could bear that, but you knew that what you were doing now was not right either. There was no such thing as a bandaid when it came to a soulmate bond. You would suffer forever and it never got easier.

“Y/N, please talk to me.” Jungkook’s voice wavered but his tears had stopped. He was doing his best to stay strong for you. Burying your head into his inviting shoulder you inhaled his scent, it was something sweet. Sweet like that night when you kissed, that significant night when you realised he was yours and you were his. Trying to recall the happiness that you felt when you two kissed you whispered, “I’m afraid.”

Jungkook had never felt more helpless. Hearing you admit this felt even more painful than you rejecting the soulmate bond. He could do very little to alleviate your worries, he couldn’t promise you forever because he himself had no power over the future, but he could promise you that he would try his best to be there until it wasn’t possible anymore.

“I can’t promise you that we will last forever, but I can promise you that as long as we are alive and have a forever to fight for I will do my best to reach it” his soft words brushed through your hair, the hand on your back tightening its hold. Fresh tears spilled from your eyes, the hot trail competing with the warmth that was growing in your chest. His words were not enough to alleviate your worries, but they were enough to pacify the inner battle between your soul and your heart.

“Hey,” he gently grabbed your shoulders, breaking your hold on him. With some distance now in between the two of you, it was easier to look at him. Your heart broke at the sight of the tears silently running down his face, a contrast to the small reassuring smile he was offering you. If not for the pain in his eyes you would have thought he was crying for you only. However, his eyes spoke of agony for two. The relationship that was meant to be, the relationship that your souls craved and you had power over. The understanding encouragement he was offering told you that he would take whatever you decided. If your decision was to not pursue this, he would accept it and never question it. With this in mind you took a deep breath in, your hands hesitantly reaching out and wiping away at the trail of tears.

“I am afraid” you stopped glancing away from him for a split second. Jungkook’s breath caught in his throat anticipating your next words. You had the power to make him or break him, his heart in your hands. With your next exhale, you let all your worries out, your stance visibly relaxing.

“But I am not afraid to fight for a future forever, with you.”

Main Masterlist

[xmint-conditionx]

tongue tied | myg

pairing: yoongi x reader, f2l

w/c: 3.5k

summary: you've been best friends with yoongi for almost a decade, and you're hopelessly in love with him. he's the most important person in your life, and you don't want to mess that up, so you can never be anything more... right?

written as a response to a request from the old blog -- the requestor was @yoongi--enthusiast; thanks again for your request, i loved doing it!!! "I had an idea... something based off of the song “tongue tied” with yoongi. I feel like it would be super soft with soft smut... I just think it would be nice to read so can you please wright it 🥺👉👈"

tags/cw: 18+ please, smut, outdoor sex, overall a little angsty but super cute too

a/n: i did not know that there was a song called tongue tied by marshmello before i wrote this so... i hope the person who requested this didn’t mean that song because I wrote this drabble over the grouplove song lmaooo but anyway, here goes! thanks luv, enjoy! also reposted from the old blog!!

Yoongi’s laugh is so beautiful. It’s rare, so when you see it, you soak up everything you can about it. The way his eyes crinkle up into crescent moons, the way his lips curl back putting his gummy smile on bright display. You can swear you see his eyes sparkle.

You are in love with him. You are in love with your best friend.

He makes loving him such an easy thing to do; bringing you into his inner world, showing you the sweet and warm center he conceals from everyone else. The way he looks at you, the way he says your name, the way he pouts when he wants a back scratch, all of those little things that make him who he is only deepen your infatuation with him.

You’re with him again this Friday night, making the drive to Bom’s house. It’s been a long week for the both of you; he’s been wrapped up in producing a track and you’ve been nose deep in college textbooks. His track is completed, and your exams are over. It’s safe to say that you both could use a good break.

It’s the end of the spring semester and the weather is going to be gorgeous tonight. The racing summer breeze coming through the open car windows is exhilarating. The sun is setting, and the warm evening light on Yoongi’s dewy skin makes him appear absolutely radiant as he navigates the highway.

You’re just listening to fun little summer jams as you speed off toward the city’s suburbs. Ones with funky little basslines that are easy to groove and sing along to. Ones that make you shout and laugh into the rushing wind. Ones that make you drink in the moment you’re having with Yoongi; ones that make you soak up all of his joy.

And when he steals a sly look your way, one hand still on the top of the steering wheel, you can swear your heart stops.

You’ve loved him as long as you can remember really knowing him. Since you were both 12, bonding over games of tag and basketball and the spilling of secrets to each other. You’d sit beneath the big tree in his backyard and share the snacks you’d bought at the corner store. He’d always let you have the last chocolate.

The only secret you’ve ever kept from Yoongi is the matter of your infatuation, and you are pretty resolute in keeping it that way.

He is the single most important person in your life. He had been there with you through it all; when your parents split up at 13, when your dad got you your first car at 15, when your long time boyfriend cheated on you at 16, when your dream college denied you at 17, when you got a full ride scholarship to a smaller university outside of the city right after that, when you were drugged at a house party at 20, when you were diagnosed with depression at 21, and when you were accepted into your masters program at 22.

You needed him, and because of that, you could never tell him.

You pull into the gates that surround Bom’s neighborhood. Her parents are pretty wealthy, so they live on a golf course. As you pull up into the driveway, you see some other students milling about, catching Frisbee. There’s Eunha, Ireum, Ji-Ah, and Miyeun that you recognize from some of your classes, but there are a few more that you’ve never met.

After a few rounds of drinks and a few lost games of flip cup, you all head outside to the back patio with all of your schoolwork from the year. Bom turns on the bluetooth speaker and sets it on the railing. You take in the night air and gaze up at the sky, wishing there was a shooting star to wish upon.

“Alright, everyone,” Bom begins, “essays and lab reports first, then tests, then miscellaneous homework.” Yoongi helps you dig through your stack to fish out the cursed papers. You all toss the stapled packages into the fire pit, one by one, each hitting with a soft thud. Once everyone has thrown their woes into the pit, Bom tops it with actual firewood and unceremoniously sets the whole lot of it on fire. You gaze into the center of the flame, watching your entire year catch fire. All the hours you spent doing that research project, all the disappointment when your group members wouldn’t follow through. Gone, like it never existed.

Yoongi’s holding your hand in his, and he’s busy drawing little circles with his thumb on your palm. Your head rests soundly on his shoulder, and you sigh into him, comfortable in where you are. The whole group piles in more papers, as you lament about the shitty professors and the shitty group projects and the shitty caf’ food and the shitty grades. Yoongi turns into you and nuzzles gently on your forehead. You feel his soft lips graze your temple, breath warm on your skin, tingles rising through your body, and you’re right where you want to be. Under the moon’s gaze with the person you love.

Before long, the breeze sends a chill through you that even the fire won’t remedy. Yoongi feels your shiver and unceremoniously removes his hoodie and puts it on over you, pulling up the hood and kissing your forehead. You always love when you wear his jackets; they surround you in his warmth, his smell. A smile plays across your lips until you notice Yoongi’s goosebumps.

“Hey,” you pout, “I don't wanna wear this if you’re gonna be cold.”

“I don’t wanna wear it if you’re gonna be cold,” he snaps back, smiling.

“Here,” you say, standing up from your deck chair. You take the step to get you to Yoongi’s chair, and sit in his lap. “This way we can both be warm, yeah?”

It takes him a second, but he wraps his arms firmly around you again, mumbling a “yeah, that’s fine” when you glance at him over your shoulder.

Your attention is called back to the group with Bom asks if you’re going to the Summer Romance Festival by the river next weekend. She’s been pushing you to get yourself out there more. The last time you were in a real relationship was high school, after all.

“I’d love to go; I hear they have the most beautiful fireworks display,” you start, “but I don’t think I will this year.”

“Well,” Bom says, “Why not?!”

“Because I don’t have a date, Bom!” you say, covering your face in the sweater paws you’ve made from Yoongi’s hoodie. “I don’t think I could find one in enough time.”

“Ya, just get Yoongi to go with you! You already do everything together anyway,” Eunha quips.

You notice that the steady rise and fall of Yoongi’s chest has stopped.

“Hey, you know we’re just friends, right Yoongi?” you look to him for backup.

The man nods, looking down and to the left.

“Okay,” Ireum speaks up, “In that case, do you want to go with me?”

“Wait, what?” you say.

“Do you want to go to the Summer Romance Festival with me? As a date?”

Yoongi tenses beneath you.

“Oh, I don’t know…” you breathe, “Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent. We can even get dinner before we go. Not too much, though. I’ll want to get us a treat from one of the dessert stalls.” Ireum says with a soft smile.

“Yeah,” you say, smiling back at him, “Okay. We’ll go together.”

Yoongi stirs beneath you. “Hey, can you get off of me?”

“What, why?” you pout.

“I said get off.”

“Yoongi, wh--”

He doesn’t wait for you to finish before he abruptly stands up, forcing you to catch yourself. When you look back at him, he’s walking toward the French doors that lead back into the house.

“Ya! What was that about?”

He keeps walking. You storm after him and slam the door, trapping you both inside.

“Yoongi, I’m talking to you! What’s your fucking problem?”

He whirs around.

“Oh, I have a problem?”

“Well, it sure seems like it.” you spit back, hands on your hips.

“Why don’t you go talk about it with your date, huh?” he says, gesturing out the window to Ireum. “Don’t you have some details to work out? He gonna pick you up? You gonna let him hold your hand? On your nice little extra special romantic date? I guess I’ll just fuck right off and leave you two alone, yeah? That’s what you want, cause we’re just friends and all.”

“Yoongi, we… are friends! You’re my best friend!”

“Did you ever for a second think that I could want more?”

“What?!”

“I fucking love you, Y/N! Isn’t it obvious?! I’ve loved you since the 7th grade. You remember when we played spin the bottle at Ha-joon’s house? Do you remember when you kissed me?”

“Yoongi…”

“No, let me finish. Do you remember the frat party we crashed junior year? Remember when we got up onto the roof and made out until we fell asleep? And then you weren't there when I woke up so I walked back to my dorm and then we just pretended it never happened? What the fuck was that, Y/N?!”

You reach for his arm, but he backs up, flinching away from you.

“I am so in love with you it hurts!”

“Yoongi.”

“But I guess if that guy can make you happy, then whatever,” he sighs.

“Yoongi.”

“Go on your little date and have fun and I’ll just go write some more goddamn songs about you--”

“Yoongi!”

He stills, pain flashing through his eyes.

“Yoongi,” you say quietly, easing toward him, “I had no idea. I left the roof to go inside and get you some water. When I came back, you were gone. You had been drinking a lot that night… and I felt really bad because… I thought I had taken advantage of you… Ever since I first kissed you at Ha-joon’s house, I wanted to do it again. And again. And, you looked so good that night and up on the roof when you were laughing about the quarterback I just… I couldn't hold myself back anymore. I thought surely you didn’t want to actually be kissing me.”

“Why the fuck would I have kissed you back, then?”

“You were drunk, and I--” you’re cut off when he grabs your wrist.“I have wanted to kiss you every time I’ve seen you since you first kissed me,” he says, glancing down at your lips. ”I want to kiss you right now.”

You take no time in closing the distance between the two of you, your lips crashing desperately. You’ve tasted his kiss before, but this time feels different. His hands are winding through your hair, pulling you deeper into his kiss. You moan against his mouth, and he responds with his tongue teasing your lips, asking for entry. You grant it, and he explores. One of his hands holds your jaw, the other still intertwined with your hair. His tongue runs along your bottom lip before he sucks it in, drawing out a small whimper from you. Taking his hand from your jaw, he runs it down your neck and décolleté and then down over your stomach and latches it on your hip, sinking his fingers into your skin. He gives your hair a small tug, just enough to break the kiss and expose your neck. He breaks off and trails kisses up your jawline and then onto your neck, speaking in between kisses.

“You have… no idea how… much I’ve… wanted to tell… you everything,” he breathes onto your neck, and you feel a heat pooling in your panties.

“Please, Yoongi…” you say as you begin to run one hand under his shirt. He stops kissing and looks up at you with the softest expression.

“What is it?” he asks as he grabs both of your hands in his, bringing one of them up to his mouth to sprinkle kisses along your fingers.

“You…” you begin and sigh, “you have no idea how much I want you.”

He stills.

“Are you sure? We don’t have to, I’m sorry, I just…” he trails off, eyes getting lost in the way his jacket is draped on your figure.

Him eyeing you up doesn’t make it any better.

“I’ve wanted you for so long,” you say, eyes pleading up at him. “I’m tired of waiting.”

After a beat, he sighs.

“Neither of us are waiting another minute,” he says, landing a quick peck on your lips and going across the room to the couch, grabbing the throw blanket that rests on the arm.

“Come on, I have an idea,” he says, grabbing your arm and leading you out of the front door, across the street, through someone’s back yard until you reach the top of a hill on the side of a fairway. You watch as he scans the area, holding the blanket tight. His gaze lingers on two hills near the green of whatever hole this is, where there are a few more trees and hills to block you from the sightline of those second story windows. He looks at you, eyes asking the question. You smile and nod, and that’s all he needs.

He tugs your hand and you both go running down the fairway, laughing along the way. Once you reach your spot, he quickly puts down the blanket and lays on it. You’re still standing at his feet, hands fiddling with the ends of the jacket sleeves.

He smiles up at you and holds his arms up in your direction and says, “come here, beautiful,” while doing little grabby hands.

You slowly walk up to where he’s laying and sit on top of his hips, feeling how hard he already is. His hand rests on your hip underneath the fabric of his jacket, the other holding the side of your face.

“Let me see you,” he says with a tinge of whine in his voice, and that gives you an idea.

You reach under the still zipped jacket and fiddle around. Yoongi looks up at you befuddled, the corners of his lips turning down slightly as he tries to figure out what’s going on. When your hands emerge, one is holding your strapless bra and the other is holding the halter top you had been wearing. You can’t believe you managed to unzip the back by yourself.

You throw the garments to the side, and watch as understanding hits his face. His eyes glaze over and he licks his lips, clearly shaken up by your little trick.

He carefully dips his fingers below the waistband of your shorts and eases them down. You put your weight on him and give him a few kisses as he continues to move them down your legs. Once they too have been tossed to the side, you sit back up, lips red and swollen from the kiss.

He gently reaches up to the zipper of the jacket and begins to slowly pull it down, letting the cool night air in. You feel your nipples harden at the exposure to both the night air and Yoongi’s hungry eyes. He swallows and licks his lips as he runs his eyes over every new inch of you that is revealed. Memorizing your form, your perked nipples, the way your chest rises with each anxious breath.

He reaches back up to the collar and eases one shoulder of fabric off. You move to take the rest off despite the cold, but he stills your hand with his.

“Keep it on, please. I love seeing you wear my clothes,” Yoongi says, intertwining his fingers with yours.

You bring his hand up to your lips, pressing them against his knuckles as you slowly grind your still covered core on his length. He groans in frustration, his pants getting tighter. You let go of his hand and run your fingers up beneath his white cotton v-neck, his ab muscles flinching under your touch. You help him remove his shirt, taking in the way his pale skin shines under the moonlight.

Seeing you look at him makes his cock twitch in his pants, and you think it’s time to provide him some relief.

You scoot back and start to undo his belt, getting low and staring up at him through your lashes. His breath hitches when you make eye contact with him, and then it starts to pick up as you undo the button and zipper. You shimmy down the denim, but leave his black boxer-briefs where they are.

You come back up to the waistband after releasing his jeans, and you take the elastic in between your teeth. You tug them down with your teeth while your hands pull them on the sides. His erection springs free, and he sucks in a fast breath when his cock meets the cool air. You take the opportunity to let your warm breath ghost over his throbbing cock, coaxing a deep groan from Yoongi. He puts his hand to your cheek, and you look up to meet his gaze.

“I don’t think I can last if you put me in your mouth, baby girl. We can do head next time,” Yoongi says, and your heart soars at the pet name. You ease back up so that you’re straddling him once more, and reflexively start to grind on him again.

“Please let me take care of you. Look how wet you are,” he says, running his fingers over your clothed slit, dipping one finger in to collect a bit of slick. He tastes his finger and says. “Yeah, we’re definitely going to need to do head next time.”

You blush at the thought of him buried between your thighs, vulgarly slurping up everything you have to give him. You clench just thinking about it, and Yoongi notices. He pulls your panties to the side, takes the head of his cock and presses it to your clit, teasing your entrance. His precum mixes with your wetness, and you can’t resist him any more. You’ve resisted him for years, and you’re done.

You slowly ease yourself down on his cock, only making it halfway down before you have to wait for you to adjust. You both look at each other; Yoongi’s jaw is set and his eyebrows are furrowed together. Your mouth drops open as you raise and lower yourself again, feeling the delicious stretch that accompanies it. You bottom out and begin setting a slow and gentle pace.

Your body is rolling steadily, moonlight creating beautiful shadows on your body as you take him in over and over. As many times as you’ve dreamed of this, you still didn’t fathom it being this good or it feeling this right.

Yoongi is everything you had imagined he would be and then some. The way he is looking up at you, the way his soft little moans escape every time you bottom out, the way his eyebrows furrow together at the sight of your dripping heat enveloping him. Perfection.

He takes his hands and trails them up the curve of your waist, stopping just below your breasts. He runs his thumbs over your nipples, making you shudder and arch your back, pushing your chest into his hands. He palms them, kneading little circles around your areolas.

You lean forward, putting your weight on him again, and he meets you eagerly with another kiss. He wraps his arms around your back, keeping himself under the jacket, and you pick up the rhythm. Yoongi scratches his nails all the way down your back. Once he gets to your ass, he cups it, squeezing gently. You place your forehead against his, and your eyes meet.

“Y/N,” he whispers, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, “you look so beautiful on top of me like this. Please let me see this sight for the rest of my life.” You whimper at the praise, and pick up the pace.

“Please,” he continues, small grunts mixing in with his words, “Don’t wake up tomorrow and pretend like this never happened. Please... don’t break my heart,” he pleads.

“Not a chance, Yoon. I can never let you go. You’re everything to me. You’ve always been.”

“Baby, I am so close. Can I--”

“Come with me, Yoongi. Let’s do it together,” you say. Yoongi’s hands are on your hips and he’s thrusting up into you with an unrelenting pace. At this angle, you can feel his head graze against your cervix with each thrust, sending white spots in your vision.

You both reach your end at the same time, breaths mingling as you come down from your highs. You lay your head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat gradually slow. He presses a soft, lingering kiss to the top of your head and sighs into your hair.

“So…” he begins, “do you wanna go to the festival with me?” Yoongi asks.

“Are you gonna pick me up? Let me hold your hand? Have a nice little special romantic date?” you fire back, trying your best to sound like him. You sit up on your arm, letting your hair hang over to one side, and watch the light dance in his eyes as he laughs.

“Yeah,” he laughs, “I might even get us a little snack from one of the desert vendors.”

[sinswithpleasure]

The Playgirl (ft. LOONA’s Yves) [Part 3] [Female Reader]

—————

I’m back with part 3!

I know I said I’d start mentioning Yves being futa here, but welp, I doubt it’d be out until Part 6-8?

If you prefer, this is also on AO3 and AFF!

Thanks to @existslikepristin​ and @ggidolsmuts​ for editing / beta reading!

—————

Another month passes.

Yves has been improving a lot, and you're teaching her more than just math. Even on weekends, she requests tutoring, and both of you work on projects or study together, be it at Seoul U's cafe or in empty classrooms.

Two months since you began tutoring her, about one month since you took up her deal. Something in Yves shifts—when she began studying, it was out of just competitive spirit. Now, she seems to truly like what she's doing, and you can't help but to let yourself enjoy the sight of this Yves. She turns up to school a little more regularly, though she still comes to terrorize people. She doesn't go out to parties as much, choosing instead to hang with you. The attention you get from her feels like too much and not enough at the same time. 

Other than being your student, Yves becomes somewhat of a regular fixture in your life. She still frustrates you—her semi-regular absences from school are met with your nagging and her regular dismissal, her constant nonchalance about how she carries herself still annoys you, and she still constantly flirts with you. That last point is also part of the reason why she is kind of a welcome presence in your life. If she isn't present in school, she will be seen leaning against a wall after class, leather jacket over her shoulders, your favourite mocha frappe in her hands. If she doesn't turn up for a tutoring session, she drops a call and apologizes, then makes it up to you with your favourite dessert next session. On the regular, she always has a compliment or a greasy remark tailored for you on hand, both making you groan and internally panic simultaneously.

It doesn't help that she keeps getting prettier, at least to you. Every day, her empty desk taunts you. Sometimes, you wish she was next to you, lollipop in her mouth, gazing at you and flirting with you. Your heart skips a beat when she pushes herself off the wall to wrap an arm around your shoulder, waving the frappe in front of your face with a "Hey, babygirl" . You look forward to the text exchanges with her every night, where both of you can text for hours. You adore her lip bites when she is focused on something, her soft "Assa!" when she gets something right.

Perhaps your crush on her is starting to get out of hand, but you don't want it to end. 

-----

Your phone rings. Caller ID: yves 💘

"Yo, babygirl."

"Don't—ah, nevermind."

"The cafe's closed today. Wanna come over to my place?"

"What?"

"My place. Come over."

"Oh, um…"

"Text me your address. I'll pick you up."

"Okay."

When Yves hangs up, you panic. Her place? You'll get to see how she lives? Her private space? What?! You fire off a text to Yves, then you carry on panicking.

[yves💘 has sent a message:]

Gotchu

I'll see you in 15, babygirl

Can't wait ;)

-----

Yves's place is cozy. For someone so punk rock, her place looks so homely, so full of life. However, Yves lives alone. Weird, considering there's a lot of stuff that is placed neatly on tables and shelves, too much for one person to use. 

"Welcome to my humble abode, babygirl." Yves curtsies, flashing you her dazzling smile. You place your bag down on the couch in her living room, rummaging to find what you need.

"Hey, would you mind if I went for a shower first? I've had a busy morning."

"Oh, no, sure. Go ahead."

"Right, thanks babe."

Yves leaves. In the meantime, you wander around her living room, glancing at the items on her shelves. A vintage tea set, a back scratcher, and an old camera? Those look pretty cool. Beneath that, another shelf holds a few old DVD cases, each of some old music from the 70s and 80s. Also, are those cassette tapes? You pick each one up, getting a feel of them in your hands. Damn, these are cool.

You wander along the hallways. When you pass by the bathroom, you can hear the water running. Suddenly, you’re hit with intrusive thoughts, all of them about Yves.

Your crush. Just a handful of metres away from you. Undressing. Naked. Under the shower. Water running down her bare skin, maybe over those chiseled abs of hers? Her naked chest, her legs?

You return to her couch, collapsing on it, trying to fight the dirtier thoughts in your head.

You sink your face in your hands, groaning at the thought of a naked Yves. This isn't the first time, and it won't be the last, but it sucks to be thinking of something inappropriate when the time isn't right. The gulps of water you inhale don't quench the correct thirst, but at least it does something.

"Hey baby."

Yves's voice makes you jump. The cutest girl ever greets your eyes, with a look that you never thought she'd rock. That same girl has her head bowed, a sheepish smile on her face, her hand moving to tuck some hair behind her ear.

She looks gorgeous.

Her wet hair, formerly slicked back, now falls over her forehead, forming cute bangs. Her  leather jackets and crop tops are traded for a cozy oversized long-sleeved sweater that engulfs her body, giving her sweater paws. Yves pairs that with sweatpants, and a cute pair of bunny slippers. 

She looks so cute and all you want to do is to mash her lips with yours.

You gasp, freezing. Yves walks over to you, planting her books on the table, refusing to meet your eyes. She grins when she finally looks at you though.

"How do I look?"

"Ah, um, er…" You stammer, unable to process the sight of the punk rock, cool, bad girl Yves now looking like a girly, adorable cutie. This wasn't Yves, this was just Ha Sooyoung. 

"You… you look, er, good," you breathe.

Yves halts, red starting to colour her ears. She looks away, seemingly wiping at her face with one of her sleeves.

"Thank you." Her voice is tiny, tinier than usual. You want to hug her but you control yourself, settling to admire how she looks instead. She looks so pretty, so fucking pretty, and you wonder why she doesn't look like this on the regular. Maybe she's letting you see her more private, intimate side. Maybe she somehow found out you quite like this style. Whatever the reason is, it's working. How do you even continue to function today, now that you've seen Yves look like this?

You love this Yves— no, this is Ha Sooyoung, you hastily remind yourself. She looks so domestic, so cute, so… girlfriend? You want to glomp her, and that urge is increasingly hard to control.

"Let's begin."

"O-Okay."

Both of you slip into your roles as teacher and student. For Yves, it’s seamless, but for you, you struggle to do so. The student herself is a distraction.

The session begins.

-----

"Stay for dinner, babe?"

Yves rises from her chair, walking over to her kitchen. She begins pulling stuff out of her fridge and cabinets, setting them on the table. 

"Oh, sure."

You sink yourself on a dining chair as Yves ties an apron around her neck. She begins work on chopping up some garlic and onions, and you let yourself just… look at her. 

She looks so cool, so domestic, so beautiful as she works on whatever it is. You can't help but fall harder for her, and you let yourself gaze lovingly stare at her.

"You're staring, babygirl."

"Ummfhhhdgh!" You stammer, hastily looking away to pretend you weren't. You drum your fingers on the table, shifting around on your seat to distract yourself from Yves's eyes. 

"Uh-uh, you don't get to hide now." Yves tilts your chin up with her finger, her eyes locked onto yours, her lips inches from yours. This is the umpteenth time Yves has had you in kissing range, and you wish she'd finish the job. 

"You look starstruck, babe. Am I that pretty?"

"Y-Yes." 

Yves chuckles, stroking your cheek with her thumb. 

"God, you're so cute. I'd kiss you right now, but we both know we'd do more than that."

"Wha—?"

"I've seen the way you look at me. I know what you're thinking. If we kiss…" Yves trails off, moving to finish her sentence next to your ear. 

"If we kiss, we both know we won't just be kissing at the end of the night."

When Yves finishes her sentence, you feel her soft lips press against your cheek. Out of the corner of your eye, you see her lips turn up in her signature cocky smirk. You’ve got the urge to kiss it off her face, but you pause, refusing to give in to her. She is right—if you kissed her, you wouldn't be able to stop yourself from jumping her.

-----

Dinner is a relatively quiet affair, with Yves winking at you when you catch eyes with her, and you becoming more flustered each time. All you can think of is about how Yves essentially admitted she knows you want her as much as she wants you, and that thought is enough to fuel your imagination for the night. 

When Yves drops you off in front of your apartment, she gets off her bike, wrapping her arms around your waist from the back.

"Huh?!"

"Goodnight babygirl," Yves whispers next to your ear, her breath causing you to shudder, "I'll be thinking of you tonight."

That settles it. The fire between your legs needs some dousing. You can't help but turn to look at Yves with the utmost shock, meeting her knowing grin. Yves waves, putting her helmet back on and riding off into the night. 

-----

The cold shower you take after reaching home does nothing for you. Yves's words still ring deep in your ear.

If we kiss, we both know we won't just be kissing at the end of the night.

I'll be thinking of you tonight.

Your body feels warm—too warm for the oversized T-shirt and boyshorts you have on. The thought of having Yves pin you against a wall, her lips on yours, tongue swiping at your lips to gain access is way too much for you, and soon enough, you imagine Yves pinning you to her bed, stripping you and teasing you with her touch. These thoughts lead you to lie atop your bed, your shirt pulled up to expose your chest, your boyshorts stripped off to let your hand circle your clit freely. 

"Oh, fuck…"

In your head, Yves has her fingers on you, touching you the same way you touch yourself now. Her fingers mirror the way yours do—rubbing directly over the hood covering your clit, before swiping between your slit to wet her fingers. 

"So wet, babygirl. All for me too."

"Oh, oh shit!"

Yves plunges her fingers deep within you, thrusting freely. Your free hand kneads your left breast, teasing your nipple to drive you crazier. 

"Fuck, Yves, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"Yes, babygirl. That's what I want to hear. Moan my name. Let the world know how wet you are for me."

The dirty sounds of your fingers thrusting deep into yourself only fuels your lust even further. The image in your head morphs from Yves fingering you to her between your legs, her panties pushed aside to expose her pussy. Yves pushes her pussy against yours, grinding against you, flexing her abs with each movement of her hips. In the physical world, you strip yourself of the shirt, grabbing a pillow and straddling it. 

"How does my pussy feel against yours, babygirl? I told you I'd make you love me."

You grind harshly on the pillow. The haze of pleasure is all you can process—how loud you moan doesn't matter anymore. 

"Fuck, yes, Yves, Yves, Yves, fuck, Sooyoung, Sooyoung, I'm gonna come, Sooyoung, I'm gonna come, I'm gonna come!"

With a squeal, you grind harder on the pillow, feeling waves of pleasure wash over your body as slick spills out of your clenching hole. Sweat runs down your forehead, your back, down your chest. In your head, Yves comes just as you do, her body writhing in pleasure as slick flows out of her. 

You collapse on the bed, letting the afterglow of your orgasm wash over you. Yves still doesn't leave your head, but you don't really hate that. You're way beyond trying to hide that you want to fuck her, or that you want her to make you hers anyway.

[shinescape]

tw: Poly relationship. Character being blindfolded and tied up. No smut just a lot of tension, teasing and suggestive content.

note: 2.3k of i don't know how to put it but it happened.

Play time

It was Saturday, resting day for most and laundry day for you and the boys. The fact that their clothes piled more than yours had you sighing loudly as you placed all the dried clothes in a basket.

It was almost lunch time but the other two were still sound asleep. You went into your room and spotted Seonghwa lying down on the bed, busy on his phone. You stepped closer to the bed and tilted the basket, all the garments falling on the bed and some hit his chest.

You didn’t say a word and sat down on the bed, starting to fold the clothes. “I’m finishing this round then I’ll help, okay?” You hummed back in response and continue on with the folding. Their clothes were bigger than yours so even after a few shirts, you were starting to get tired. You heard Seonghwa clicked his phone off and he started to sit down properly before taking a piece to fold.

The both of you worked in silence and the once pile of clothes started to disappear gradually. “Why are we even folding their clothes as well?” Seonghwa asked out of nowhere. “You’ve already folded more than ten shirts and decided to ask that, Hwa? You know how both of us hate it when they just put their clothes on the sofa so might as well just do this.” He looked at you and pouted, agreeing to the fact that both of you can’t handle the amount of clothes around the house scattered by the other two.

He looked at you long enough and decided to ask, “Is there anything you want to tell me, sweetheart?” You paused at his sudden endearment. What is going on all of a sudden, you thought. “Like what?” “Is there anything you want to try besides the usual things we do? You know like se-” Before he could finish his words, you threw a boxer at his face.

“Hey, I was asking nicely you know. But seriously, I saw the way you look at me sometimes. It’s like you have something you want to say but you shrug it off afterwards.” At this point, your whole body heated up yet you still fold the clothes like it’s nothing. “Come on, don’t ignore me, babe. Just tell me what it is that you want to try. Hurm?”

The first thing you should do was avoid his eyes or his pouting lips, basically his whole face but you looked up and everything just jumbled up in your head. Telling him your unspoken fantasies would embarrass you to death and it’s Park Seonghwa we’re talking here. He’s like a switch, sometimes he’s kind and soft and other times he’s dangerous and rough.

He was still staring at you intently, the boxer still in his hand. “I...I’ve always wanted to try blindfolding you,” Your lips feel dry all of a sudden and you licked them before continuing, “and tying your hands up.” You literally covered your face and slammed down to the covers, as if it would change anything.

Seonghwa could not believe what he just heard and the fact that you said it nervously made his stomach churned weirdly. He pushed away whatever that was between you two and pulled you back up by the shoulder. He watched how you were avoiding from looking at him, as if you might just lose control and pushed him down that instant.

“Is that all?” You shivered at the low tone of his voice and took the courage to look at him in the eyes. “I kinda like seeing you in blue jeans and a white shirt too.” You said cautiously.

He was processing everything that you said as his fingers slowly let go of you without realising. Felt as if you were going to be sucked into his gaze, you clumsily get off the bed and leave the room.

Leaving Seonghwa in his own thoughts, questioning why he asked in the first place if he himself can’t handle the fact that his lover has this side that was kept hidden all this time. It’s like he unlocked a part of you and was trying to wrap the idea around his head.

A week passed by after that seemingly heart to heart talk, it was Saturday again but no laundry to wash just a normal weekend breakfast.

You were having breakfast with Wooyoung since the other two went out early in the morning to god knows where. He wanted to cook you breakfast but you declined saying he should just rest and both of you ended up eating cold milk with cereal.

“Is everything okay? You seemed out of it these days.” He ruffled your hair and pulled you closer, planting a kiss on your temple. “Everything’s fine.” You smiled at him and hoped that he let it pass.

He narrowed his eyes at you and you can’t help but pinched his cheeks. “Any plans for today?” “None, I’m just going to laze around and play games. Unless, you have something else in mind.” He smirked to which you rolled your eyes at him. “Nothing, I’m just gonna go take a nap.” You kissed him on the lips and stood up with the bowl in your hand.

You heard movements as you were washing the bowl, an arm snaked its way around your waist. “You woke up an hour ago, let’s play a bit hmm?” You were controlling every fiber in your body to not react to his advances.

You turned around and hugged him back, “Imagine Seonghwa finding out we had fun without him, he’ll get upset.” You tried to reason. Wooyoung pulled back from the hug and gave you an annoyed look.

“You’re always so obedient to him.” He suddenly went straight to your neck and bit it. You were taken aback by his actions but he pulled away before you could scold him. He went away sulking and you sighed as you rubbed the skin he just bit. It hurts but the moist of his lips lingered and odd thoughts were getting to your head.

Afterwards, you were playing with your phone on the sofa that after some time you actually fell asleep. A couple hours later, you woke up to someone entering one of the doors in the house. You rubbed your eyes and stood up to stretch your limbs.

The house was still quiet and you assumed that Wooyoung was just in his room. You walked to your room and was about to twist the knob when it burst open, surprising you in the process. “Are you going out again, Seonghwa?” You took in his outfit and noticed that it was different than earlier in the morning.

He walked up closer to you and held you by the shoulders, “You want to do it now?” You had to blink a few times and looked at him confused. “I just woke up...and why all of a sudden?” That’s when you realised his outfit. He’s wearing a white cotton shirt and a pair of blue jeans.

You placed a palm on his chest and turned your head to the side. What the hell, is he serious about this? You felt his fingers wrapped around your hand that was on his torso and was pulling you inside the room. It was safe to say you were wide awake the moment you saw him but what’s about to happen doesn’t look safe at all.

You were sitting on the bed and he was standing right in front of you, looking fine as ever. He looked down at you and gave you something. “Is this yours?” You examine the two materials that he passed. One was a lace and the other was a tie. He hummed and crawled on the bed, leaning at the backrest.

You were contemplating as usual. As much as it was exciting, you were still somewhat intimidated by him. You made your way and sat in front of him. “I can’t believe you want to do this.” You said and tried to read his face, his eyes were staring directly at you yet the tips of his ears were red.

“This is going to be the first and last.” He said and ushered you to go on with it. You went closer and took both his hands behind him, tying it up with the necktie he gave earlier. The both of you were looking into each other's eyes as you made sure the tie was secured properly around his wrists.

“Is it too tight?” You whispered shyly. This was a first for you thus you wanted to make sure he was absolutely fine with it. He shook his head and smiled at you. You wondered how he was able to smile when you can tell deep down he’s about to lose it, the fact that he agreed to this was enough of a shocker to you.

Your eyes were leveled now and you just had to confirm, “Are you really sure about this, Hwa?” “Just do it, sweetheart.” You gulped at his reply and slowly covered his eyes with the lace.

His eyes were your favourites, just staring into them always made you weak but seeing him in this state sparked something in you like never before. You made sure he can’t see and even waved your hand in front of his blinded eyes to confirm.

You told him to lie down comfortably even though his hands were behind his back which made it hard to move around. “I can’t believe I did this to you.” You took in the sight of the never before seen Seonghwa and felt heat rushed throughout your body.

He was nervous since he couldn't see and his hands were tied so the only thing he could do was licked his lips. You got up from the bed slowly and looked at him again. He doesn’t seem as intimidating as he always was and it surely excites you yet you didn’t know what to do next. “You’re still there right?” He questioned and you hummed at him in response.

Without thinking much, you left the room and went to find Wooyoung. You had your fair share of experience but you never took the lead and realise how embarrassing that sounded. It was always Seonghwa, he does everything to make you feel loved and satisfied.

“Woo, I need your help.” You found him in his room, on his phone. He sat up and gave you a questioning look. “What is it?” You didn’t reply and rushed to his side and dragged him to where Seonghwa was.

When he saw the state Seonghwa was in, he gasped so loud you had to put a hand over his mouth. “You did this to him?” He asked quietly and you nodded in embarrassment.

Wooyoung cleared his throat loudly and saw Seonghwa froze. “Did you call him here?” “I’m sorry Hwa. To be honest I don’t know what to do and Woo seemed like he can help out a bit.” You heard him groan from the bed. “I’m going to have so much fun right now.” He smirked at the older male who was now trying to untie himself.

“You should go sit on him. For a start.” You gawked at his directness and he only pushed you to the bed as a support. You could not believe what was going on yet both your legs were now wrapped on either side of Seonghwa’s body.

Wooyoung who was now on the swivel chair with crossed legs watched the sight unfold in front of him. He told you to move up to his stomach and you heard the man under you hissed. “Stop...moving too much.” You had to admit Seonghwa was looking hot and bothered right under you and that lace made him look even hotter if that was even possible.

You couldn’t help but kiss him and felt that he wanted more as he tried to hold on to your lips longer yet you pulled away. Of course you felt bad but you have all the time to kiss on later so what’s the rush right?

“Shouldn’t we get that shirt off from him, babe?” You turned to watch Wooyoung taking something from your table and coming back to you with a playful smile. “Jung Wooyoung, I’m going to kill you once this is over.” Seonghwa growled which Wooyoung found it even more fun to tease him. You were torn between whether to stop everything or listen to Wooyoung and just do whatever he told you to. But was stopping even an option anymore?

He came closer to Seonghwa and kissed his cheek before grabbing the hem of his shirt and starting to snip its way up to the collar. The shirt now split up and you're just sitting there staring at his bare torso. “I just bought this shirt, you idiot!”

“Aww, that’s so cute of you to actually go buy one just for this.” Wooyoung chuckled, clearly enjoying the fact that he’s in control of Seonghwa at the moment. This was like a one of a lifetime chance might as well make it worthwhile before it ends, Wooyoung thought.

Although you were the one on top of Seonghwa right now, it felt like you were third wheeling instead. Your mind went totally blank and at this point whatever instructions Wooyoung gave, you would follow it willingly like a lost child.

As he was about to say something, the bedroom door creaked open. “Guys, I’m back! I brought dinner too.” You and Wooyoung turned to the door where Mingi stood there grinning, unaware of the situation.

Once he did, the expression on his face changed. “What is going on here?” He tried to take in the sight of what his lovers were up to while he was away.

You were sitting on a struggling Seonghwa and Wooyoung who sat next to both of you with the most mischievous look ever. It was indeed a sight to see.

“We’re planning to have dessert first. You wanna join us, Mingi?” At Wooyoung’s words he shut the door and made his way towards all of you.

“Why not. So where should we start?”

[sherlockfanficwriting]

Sherlock BBC "Moriarty's Games" (x reader)

A/N - Hello everybody. It’s been a while! Here is a very angsty x-reader story to get you all welcomed back! If you like angsty Moriarty and Sherlock problems, then this story is for you!

Summary - Being Sherlock's sister doesn't usually cost you deathly problems. But one day, when you receive a suspicious text, your whole life changes. Will your brother notice its hints? Or will you fall prey to his worst enemy?

-----------------------------

You tossed in your bed, relishing the last moments of peaceful slumber. Before your alarm even rang, you had silenced it. On the lock screen of your phone was a message. You squinted your eyes a few times, readjusting to the bright day.

Unknown number

Shrugging it off for later, you walked yourself out of bed and into the bathroom. As you brushed your teeth you swirled the loose strands of your hair into a messy ponytail - multitasking at its finest. After you washed up, you grazed through the closet. A row of plain and simple colored clothes stared back at you. You decided on a loose mini black skirt paired with a tighter cream colored shirt that had sleeves up to your elbow. It was spring and you would certainly not be seen with pants everyday.

Ring

Your phone let out a text notification. You sighed, already knowing it was from the unknown number. After you dressed yourself and put on a pair of canvas shoes, you finally unlocked your phone to view the message.

Unknown number

Today’s going to be a good day, isn’t it?

Your stomach dropped. The words. The length. The question. It wasn’t just any unknown number. You quickly gathered your purse and walked out of your apartment. Stepping to the edge of the curb, you frantically waved for a taxi. One came veering off the road and you hopped inside.

“Baker Street, please.”

----------------

You threw the driver a five and ran up to the apartment door, swiftly unlocking it. You skipped up the steps and knocked on Sherlock’s flat door. A few moments later, someone came and opened it.

John, seeing that it was you, gratefully smiled. “(Y/N)! How are you? You look lovely.”

You nodded at him with a small smile. “Is Sherlock here?”

John noticed your urgency and led you inside. Sitting on the couch reading a newspaper was your brother. Without looking up he said, “Good morning, (Y/N).”

You walked besides him and said, “We have a problem.”

His eyes shot to you. He read everything about you and said, “Show me your phone.”

You handed Sherlock the phone and showed him the text. “I’m certain it’s Moriarty. The words and everything about it. It fits his tone. He’s up to no good.”

John sat in front of Sherlock, a worried look plagued on his face. “Why don’t we text back?”

“No,” Sherlock said, “That’s what he wants. I’ll tell Mycroft. I know he’s not afraid of anything. This text means certain things.”

You brushed a strand of hair behind your ear and looked down at the floor. Your mind raced through possible scenarios and situations. Moriarty had a plan. He was just watching it fall into action.

“Sherlock, don’t call Mycroft yet. Moriarty knows you would do that. I think we should text back.”

Sherlock rolled his eyes. “(Y/N), you know better than this. That’s a bad decision you’re making.”

You walked over and grabbed your phone out of his hands. “We have a couple of options. Call Mycroft and he’ll do something stupid and panic or just text him back and play it out. There's no harm in doing that. This doesn’t require much thinking, yes?”

He shook his head. Your brother was angry. On more complex issues, you two would thrive. But on a simpler decision, all hell breaks loose.

“Fine. You-,” Sherlock started saying, but was interrupted by his phone ringing.

“Mycroft,” he said.

You and John looked at each other. You knew what this meant. Sherlock picked up the phone, silent. You could hear Mycroft’s voice booming through it.

“As did we,” Sherlock said, hanging up the phone.

You pondered on the situation quickly. Your brothers were known to quarrel over small things. You couldn’t risk them doing something stupid.

“I’ll be back later,” you said, walking to the door.

“(Y/N)? Where are you-?” John started asking.

“Let her,” Sherlock interrupted, angrily.

You walked out of the flat without even bothering to wave for a taxi. You needed time to think. You walked a few blocks and sat down on a concrete railing, overlooking the pier. You held the phone arms length from your face, inspecting the text.

It has to be Moriarty

You texted back with shaky hands.

You’ve got the wrong number

You swallowed, not believing that was the right thing to say. Did you act on impulse? All you could think about was how annoying your brothers got during a situation like this.

Beep

You caught your breath. They texted back. You unlocked your phone and stared at the text.

See you soon

Immediately, without having time to process the text, a pair of arms forcefully wrapped around you and pulled you back. You fell from your seat and strongly picked up by someone. Having no chance to scream, someone placed tape over your mouth, rolling it three times around your face. A large dark mask was placed over your head, blocking you from any sight. Another pair of hands grabbed you, manhandling you, as you were roughly thrown into a car. You could feel the leather seats and hear the men’s rushed words. A fury rose deep inside you. How couldn’t you see Moriarty’s plan? All the time you’ve spent against him and you couldn’t forsee his tricks? You fell right into his trap.

Your arms were tightly bound together. You started to move your legs around, but quickly stopped. Having them tied together would inhibit any plans you would need to escape. You were surprised they didn’t tie them, but decided to act calmly instead. You breathed calmly as the car drove off. Sherlock would notice in a few hours at most, you hoped.

----------------

Sherlock

“No. John I’ve just told you this! Moriarty’s waiting for us,” Sherlock said. He ran his hands through his curly hair in distress. He didn’t know what to do or how to act.

John stood up and paced around the living room. “We need to get Mycroft. It’s better if we stay together. I know you don’t know Moriarty’s specific ideas.”

Sherlock rolled his eyes. John was right. He didn’t know his plans, and he didn't like that. “Fine, we’ll go to Mycroft," he said, giving up.

John stopped walking and asked, “Where’s (Y/N)?” His eyebrows furrowed inwards and an expression of concern glazed over his face.

Sherlock looked up at him, suddenly remembering your absence. 

“She said she’ll be back later.”

“Why don’t you call her. I don’t think it’s best she’s alone now,” John said.

Sherlock pulled out his phone. As he clicked on your number, a cold iciness ran through his body. How did he just let you leave? He held the phone against his ear, intensely waiting for you to pick up, but you didn't. Sherlock’s heart slightly dropped. He knew something was off and started to feel guilty.

“She didn’t pick up?” John asked, concerned.

Sherlock shook his head as he stared at John. He abruptly stood up and walked to the kitchen. He paced to and from and opened a cabinet just to slam it shut. Anger filled throughout him as guilt clouded his mind. John put an arm on his back, offering comfort, but Sherlock moved him out of the way.

He knew what they had to do next.

----------------

Your POV

You tried to stay calm, but you couldn’t help the tears coming from your eyes. Who knew what could happen to you? Moriarty was ruthless. The car slowed to a stop and the doors immediately opened. The man sitting next to you grabbed you and dragged you out of the car. You couldn’t regain your balance and fell on rugged hard concrete since you were subjected to an entirely black vision. You winced in pain, already feeling the blood oozing from your knee. The man stood you up and aggressively walked you inside somewhere. You were terrified. You couldn’t see and you were restrained.

“Over here,” a man said in the distance. His voice was strong but monotone. It wasn’t Moriarty’s.

You were walked another way and violently thrown on the ground. You tried getting up, but were forcefully shoved back down again. The floor was cold and you can already feel the bruises appearing on your hands. There was no luck.

“Don’t move!” A loud voice boomed.

You shuddered and stayed still. Someone removed the mask from your head. Your eyes darted everywhere, inspecting your surroundings. You were in a warehouse, but you couldn’t locate which one. A man stood in front of you to your right, looking you down. Another man stood by the door. His arms crossed on top of his chest. You didn’t recognize them.

“Well, look who we have here!” A voice defiantly said.

Suddenly, Moriarty appeared from the corner. He wore a dark suit paired with a large smile - a sadistic smile. Your heart dropped. You knew it was Moriarty but actually seeing him scared you even more. Part of you was hoping you were wrong.

Moriarty walked closer to you. He bent down to your level.

"I didn't think you would be this easy. You believe you're so smart, don't you?"

You tried hard not to spit in his face. Making a move on him would only dig you in a deeper hole.

"You think you're smart? You had to get me because you can't even get Sherlock. That definitely sounds like a smart person to me."

Moriarty's face turned angry and he slapped your neck, not hard enough to inflict pure pain. His smile returned and your heart sank even deeper. Suddenly, he grabbed you and forced you to stand up, his hands painfully clenching your arms. You struggled and tried to stand away from him, but he was too strong.

"Bring the chair," Moriarty said.

His guards brought a chair and placed it in the corner of the room. Tears escaped your eyes and you were absolutely out of luck. All of the men here outnumbered you. If it wasn't Moriarty, you could outsmart them and escape, but that wasn't the case.

Moriarty sat you down on the chair and stepped away. You tried kicking him, but to no avail. His guards tightly wrapped your hands and legs together and to the chair.

"I plan on leaving Sherlock a little surprise when I'm done," he said, laughing.

Moriarty signaled to the guards. They walked out of the room. As soon as the door shut, he focused his glare on you.

"We're going to have a lot of fun."

He walked up to you and ripped your necklace, that Sherlock gifted you, off. You tried to keep an expressionless face. You didn't want to show any sign of weakness. Moriarty softly ran his hand along your collarbones only to tear your blouse off. You were terrified and saw a completely different side of him. Your skin felt cold and you couldn't help but feel vulnerable. Searching the room for an escape, you focused your eyes away from him. You couldn't concentrate.

"Such perfect skin......it would be a shame if something happened," Moriarty said.

He pulled out a gun from his pocket and threw it on the floor. He held a sharp knife and stared down at you.

"Just tell me what you want," you sobbed, pleading.

Moriarty chuckled.

"It's you."

The blade pierced your skin and you winced and shrieked in pain. You could feel the blood drip from your chest to your lap. Your eyes focused on your legs which were decorated with bruises and scratches. You wondered if this was it for you. It very well might be.

You forcefully spit on Moriarty. You didn't care anymore. He angrily slapped your face.

"You're going to regret doing that!"

Moriarty went in to kiss you, but as he got closer to your face, you bit his neck. He yelped and stabbed the knife in your skin. All you felt was pain, but you were satisfied with inflicting pain on him. Your perception of time began to distort. Your vision changed and your heart beat slower. You knew what was happening. Part of you wanted to hold on, a moment you never knew you would be experiencing so soon. The other part of you wanted to let go - become released from all this pain. Your eyes closed and you felt yourself on the ground, in and out of consciousness.

------------------

A door was suddenly shot down and you opened your eyes. You were conscious, but asleep, and the noise awoke you. The pain was constant, but you felt it even more now. Your vision adjusted to the sight in front of you. It was a wall. You wanted to speak, but you couldn't. A chill ran up through your body, and you felt your skirt folded up lifted higher than it was before. You whimpered and felt as if your heart was crying.

"(Y/N)!" A voice cried.

You couldn't move, but someone ran up to you and turned your shoulder slightly over. It was Sherlock. His eyes were full of tears and he wrapped his arm around you tight. He looked at you with pleading eyes. You sensed his guilt and pure sadness. But, he masked another emotion. Sherlock saw your skirt and unfolded it. Suddenly, time moved at a different pace. Sherlock carried you off the ground and quickly ran out. You tried to keep your eyes open. You noticed Moriarty on the ground and a load of policemen and paramedics nearby. Commotion and noise filled the room. You felt a hand caress your head and you knew it was John's. Lestrade spoke to you and squeezed your hand. You couldn't talk. You felt your body being transferred to someone else. They walked away quickly, your head bobbed slightly.

You heard an incredibly loud thud and scream.

"How could you do this to my sister?" Sherlock screamed. His voice faded away as you were rushed out. You didn't know what was happening, but you maintained a certain calamity that you didn't know you possessed. Nonetheless, you were scared. You tried to navigate the possibilities of your situation. All of a sudden, someone gripped your hand.

"(Y/N), I couldn't save you. I'm so sorry. How could I?" Sherlock cried. He buried his head on your side. John's voice echoed around you. He demanded the paramedics to work quickly and for everyone to move. You felt something on your chest and knew it was John, trying to stop your bleeding.

You used all the effort you had left in you to stroke Sherlock's head.

He didn't know that he had saved you.

Until next time..............

[apocalypseornaw]

Keep Me From You

For the square "Temporary amnesia" on @girl-next-door-writes make me feel bingo

Warnings: mention of injury,cursing

Word Count: 10,201

Smidge of angst but lots of fluff

“Dean I’m fine. A few scratches but I’ll be home soon and you’re more than welcome to play nurse” You’d left a few days before to help Claire out on a hunt and had called him to say you were only about an hour out from Lebanon. “So you want me to wear the uniform and all?” he teased and heard you laugh. That was a sound that he’d always loved. “Of course I want the uniform, why would you even ask?” A smile slipped onto his face as hearing just how truly happy you sounded to be coming home to him. He’d never imagined getting this. Someone who really did love him and not only understood the life but lived it as well. “I’ll see you soon sweetheart” “Better be waiting for me at the door….” Your sentence was cut short by the sound of tires squealing then a hard hit. 

Dean knew a wreck when he heard one and his heart fell to his feet “Y/N!” when you didn’t reply he screamed your name again which brought Sam running into the room. “What’s wrong?” Dean was already on his feet grabbing the keys to the impala “Y/N’s been in a wreck. We gotta get to her”

By the time Dean and Sam rolled on scene a passerby had called 911. Multiple cop cars, a couple ambulances and even a fire truck had the night lit brightly. Dean barely stopped the car from rolling before he was jumping out. Your car was on it’s side, the driver door crumpled in. “Y/N!” before he could get close Sam grabbed him along with three of the firemen on scene “Sir! We already got her out! She’s in the ambulance!”

Dean looked to see the ambulance in question pulling away “Is she alive?” The firemen nodded solemnly “She’s in critical condition but she’s alive”  Sam pulled him back towards the impala “C’mon we’ll beat them to the hospital. We know her Dean she’s strong” Sam nodded to the firemen that he had Dean so they headed to finish cleaning up the scene. Dean looked at your car once more before following Sam “If the other driver isn’t in bad shape..I’ll kill em”

------

Sam took the lead to speak with the doctors because by the time they got to the hospital he didn’t really trust Dean to not throw a punch. “Mr Evanson..your sister in law is in critical condition as you were told at the scene. She was hit by a drunk driver that ran a red light. She’s got multiple contusions, a fractured skull and a dislocated shoulder” the fake names had you as Dean’s wife should something like this happen and Eileen as Sam’s. Helped to have insurance and provided a cover story so all of you could get updates on each other should injuries ever occur severe enough to warrant a hospital trip.

Before Sam could open his mouth to ask any questions further about your condition Dean spoke up “Let me guess the bastard that hit her is just fine right?” Sam couldn’t really blame Dean. You were one of his best friends and knowing you made it out of a hunt just fine to turn around and get hurt this severely by an idiot who drank too much and chose to get behind the wheel was more than upsetting. “Mr Evanson I know you’re upset but I assure you we’re doing everything for your wife we can” Sam could tell Dean was doing what he did best which was to lean into anger more than any other emotion so before he could fire off threats to a doctor or worse Sam grabbed his arm then looked back at the doctor “When can we see her?” “As soon as she’s settled into the room I’ll send a nurse out to get both of you”

The moment the doctor stepped away Dean spun around and hit the wall hard enough his fist left a hole in the plaster. “She was talking to me Sam. What if I distracted her? What if she would’ve seen him sooner if she hadn’t been on the phone?” “Dean, don't do that to yourself. This isn’t your fault” It shocked Sam more than anything to see Dean wasn’t trying to hide the tears in his eyes when he faced him “I can’t lose her Sammy” “You won’t. I’m gonna call Eileen and Jody to let them know. She’ll be ok. Let the doctors do what they can then if need be we’ll find other means to help her. She’s strong, she’s a fighter and honestly I think it would take a lot more than a wreck to keep her from your side” “Let’s hope you’re right”

------

A little over an hour passed with Sam and Dean pacing across the waiting room. The other inhabitants of it and staff alike were giving both men a wide berth, Dean even moreso. The air around him was thick with the mixture of anger at you being in this shape and fear at the possibility of losing you.

When a nurse finally walked in and asked “Mr Evanson and brother?” Dean snatched his head up “Over here” she smiled warmly at him “Your wife is out of surgery and stable. Would you and your brother like to see her?” “Please” Dean managed trying to remember it wasn’t this woman’s fault you were hurt.

------

The walk to your room felt longer than anything Dean had even endured. When he walked in to see your still form he could feel his hands ball into fists. You were the single most important person on the face of the earth to him besides Sam. Your head was bandaged, your left shoulder was in a sling and both arms had gauze nearly covering every surface. “When’s she gonna wake up?” Sam asked knowing Dean needed an answer but also knowing his brother wouldn’t be very good at communicating at the moment. 

“That’s a tricky question. It’s really up to her. She’s in stable condition, there’s no bleeding on her brain. Now it’s just up to her body” “Thank you. Can we stay with her a while?” “You both can stay an hour but only one can stay overnight” “Thank you” the nurse walked away and Sam turned back to see Dean was motionless at the foot of your bed.

“Dean?” Sam called jarring him out of his thoughts. “She’s a hunter. I’ve seen her hurt and I’ve known that there was always a possibility of something happening to one of us but she was fine, she was headed home and laughing” Dean had walked up next to your bed and left his fingers barely brush against the leather bracelet tied around your wrist. It was a gris-gris gifted to you by a witch in New Orleans three years before, just a couple months before you and Dean had gotten together actually. 

You’d helped her out and it was supposed to protect you from evil. You hadn’t taken it off since citing that it was a lucky charm too considering you hadn’t gotten seriously injured on a hunt in quite a while. Turned out it only worked on supernatural beings not human actions.  “She’s gonna be ok Dean” Sam repeated as Dean gently took your hand in both of his and sat down in the chair next to the bed before looking up at his little brother “How can you be so sure?” “I’ve seen her fight and I’ve seen how much she loves you. She’s not leaving us like this”

------

The two of them stayed like that for the next hour barely talking, simply watching you breathe. When the hour passed Sam headed back to the bunker while Dean stayed rooted in the chair holding your hand. “Remember when we first met? God I thought you hated me because of my dad..he had a habit of turning people into enemies. I’ve never seen Bobby laugh as hard as talking about the time you backed dad down on a hunt by calling him a washed out jarhead that didn’t know a vampire from a rugaru. Baby you’ve survived so much..you’re stronger than anyone I know” he didn’t even realize he was crying before the droplet hit your hand.

“Please come back to me. I don’t want to do this without you. I love you” he nearly whispered the last part willing you to hear him and open your eyes. 

------

For three days Dean sat at your side. Sam would bring food and clothes. Eileen had of course headed back to Lebanon when she heard what happened and Jody along with all the girls had been in near constant contact. You had so many people behind you but the horrifying reality was it didn’t matter how much backup you had this time. This fight was a solo one.

The nurses and doctors assured him that you were healing. Your body was simply mending itself and keeping you asleep to save energy to do so. He didn’t care about anything they said he needed you awake to see for himself that you were ok.

It was during visitor hours so Eileen was sitting across the room flipping through a magazine while Sam had gone after coffee. The hardest thing for any of them was simply being forced to sit around and wait to see if you’d wake up on your own. Of course Rowena was digging around to see about some spells to help speed up healing but those were a bit fragile and out of her usual wheelhouse which was to cause damage to someone instead of healing them.

“Dean they were out of sugar so I had to put artificial sweetener in yours” Sam spoke from the doorway as he walked into the room. Dean shrugged “I don’t care” Sam shared a look with Eileen when he handed her coffee over. She signed “I’m worried about him” so Sam nodded and mouthed “Me too” before walking over to hold Dean’s coffee out to him. 

Dean took it then looked back at the bed “Why isn’t she awake yet Sammy?” “Head injuries take a little more to heal Dean” Sam offered but knew it was of little solace. All of them wanted nothing more than for you to wake up. Sam walked back over to stand next to Eileen but a movement of your hand had all of them on their feet and next to the bed “Y/N?” Dean spoke first and when you opened your eyes they all shared a sigh of relief “Thank god baby” Dean breathed moving to press a kiss to your lips but you snatched your head away “Dean, what the hell?” 

------

Your head felt like it’d been run over by a truck. You felt like you were drunk and there wasn’t a body part that didn’t hurt.  When you finally forced your eyes open you realized you were in a hospital room. Sam, Dean and Eileen was next to your bed meaning you must have gotten hurt on a hunt but you couldn’t remember how.

“Thank god baby” baby? Did Dean just call you baby? Before you could ask he leaned forward as if to kiss you so you snatched your head away not missing the look on his face as you said “Dean, what the hell?” 

“Y/N? What's the last thing you remember?” Eileen asked stepping closer to the bed while Dean backed away obviously hurt but you weren’t sure why he’d called you baby or tried to kiss you. You were friends yeah but he’d never acted like he had those feelings for you. You realized your head hurt even worse when you tried to think of why he would be hurt but a memory finally came to you of you and Eileen working a shifter case in Austin. “The shifter?” you asked hesitantly and saw her eyes widened.

“Eileen? What’s wrong?” you asked grimacing when you tried to sit up further only to realize your left arm was in a sling. Sam moved to help you and you noticed Dean looking rather lost standing off to the side of the room. She looked over at him sympathetically before finally saying “Y/N that case was over three years ago”

------

 Three years? You’d lost three years worth of memories. Dean had slipped out the room after alerting the Doctor Rhodes you were awake and once Eileen assured Sam she’d stay at your side he went after his brother. You were only half listening to the doctors as they gave a run down of the wreck you’d been in and the injuries you’d received. “Well if you’re saying my brain is fine why the hell do I have a three year gap in my memory?” you knew you were being a bit blunt but given the circumstances you felt it was warranted.

“Mrs Evanson this is common in an injury like yours” the nurse nearest you spoke so you cut your eyes at Eileen silently questioning the name they’d called you. She smiled and touched Doctor Rhodes on the shoulder. When he turned to look at her she motioned to you “Can I have a few moments alone with her before you take her for tests?” he looked back at you then nodded. After he and the nurses finally exited your room giving a warning that transport would be there in twenty to take you down for a cat scan Eileen came over and sat gently on the side of your bed facing you “Ask” You looked around the room eyes settling on Dean’s jacket that he’d left draped over the back of one of the chairs “What have I missed?” she followed your line of sight over her shoulder then smiled sadly before looking back at you “The shifter case was only a month before you and Dean got together” “We’ve been together three years?” you asked making sure you were facing her fully as you spoke. “Yeah. For the insurance he’s listed as your husband and Sam’s listed as mine since me and him have been together two and a half years” 

You felt tears sting your eyes as the realization of why Dean had looked so hurt when you pulled away from him hit you at once “Why don’t I remember? God he must hate me” She covered your right hand with hers lacing your fingers together and the familiarity of that small action bought a smile to your face as she leaned down to look you in the eye before saying “Believe me when I say there is nothing on earth you could do to make that man hate you sweetie. Now I’ll be here when they get you back from the tests but I’m gonna go find him and Sam in the meantime ok?” you nodded not trusting your voice at the moment so she kissed your forehead then nodded to the nurse that had just just stepped into the door before walking out.

------

Eileen found Sam and Dean outside in the parking lot. They were leaned against the side of the impala staring at the entrance of the hospital. When they saw her they both pushed off the car Sam getting to her side first while Dean was a little slower to approach “How is she?” Sam asked and Eileen shrugged “She found out she’s missing three years. How would you be?” Then her eyes drifted over to Dean “She’s afraid you’re gonna hate her because she doesn’t remember being with you” “I could never hate her especially for something that’s not her fault” he quickly replied and she nodded “That’s what I told her but I think you need to be in the room too when she gets back from having her scans done” 

------

You were in short terrified. The scans showed that your skull was healing quite well actually and as far as structural wise your brain was in good shape and according to Doctor Rhodes your memory loss was more than likely temporary. The bad news? In cases like yours those memories could return in a matter of weeks or a matter of years. There was no way to estimate the amount of time it would take from one person to the next.

“When can I go home?” you asked adding in your head the fact that you weren’t exactly sure where home was these days. “In a couple days at this rate and I’d say within two to four weeks you can return to normal life” There was a knock on the door and one of the nurses peeked her head in “Her husband, brother in law and sister in law want to come in” Doctor Rhodes looked back at you so you nodded with a small smile “Do you remind going back over what you’ve told me?”

“Of course” he nodded to the nurse so she stepped back out and a moment later Eileen walked in trailed by Sam then finally Dean “Mr Evanson your wife asked me to go over the findings from her test with the three of you” you barely met Dean’s eyes while he listened to Doctor Rhodes despite the fact that his gaze never left your face. When the doctor mentioned you’d be going home in a couple days if you stayed healing at this rate Dean shared a look with Eileen that you didn’t miss before the three of them thanked the doctor then he excused himself.

“So turns out I was right Dean, you do have the harder head” you tried to tease but heard your voice fall flat at the end. You wanted nothing more to remember the last three years of your life. The three people standing in front of you meant the most to you yet you could only remember so much and apparently now shared your life with one of them but couldn’t so much as remember ever sharing a kiss with him. 

“Y/N..Eileen told me what you said” Dean spoke, stepping closer to the bed. He tapped the bed close to your leg but didn’t touch you “Sweetheart there’s nothing that could make me hate you. I was on the phone with you when the wreck happened. I’ve never been more afraid in my life and just seeing you awake? That’s a win for me” “I want to remember if that helps any Dean.I wish I did because it seems we’re happy” “I’d like to think we are” he replied with a small smile. You moved your leg closer to his hand so he took the hint to gently touch you near your ankle.

“While we’re all here talking..can someone tell me where is home for me?” you asked embarrassed over not being able to remember such a small detail “Um you live at the bunker” Sam answered cutting his eyes at Dean who nodded “You’ve been living there for about two years full time” “Oh then I guess we’re really serious then huh?” your voice was low enough you weren’t exactly sure Dean had heard you until he said “Yeah” meeting your eyes for a second before clearing his throat “Um visitation is over in an hour. I was gonna stay but if that’s weird for you I’m sure Eileen or Sam would” 

“Of course” they both spoke over each other then shared a small smile. Your heart ached seeing the look on Dean’s face at the two of them so in sync while you didn’t remember him. “Maybe Eileen could stay? She can help fill in some blanks since I remember hunting with her last?” you offered and Dean nodded “Of course sweet..Y/N” you noticed how he stopped himself from calling you sweetheart. Christ you’d been friends with Dean for so long. He was the best man you’d ever known but you also knew he had the self worth of a grape and you could only imagine what this was doing to him. “Thank you Dean” you whispered and he smiled slightly “Of course”

------

Dean didn’t really talk much before him and Sam left for the night but he did ask if you wanted him to bring you a change of clothes since the nurse said you could shower with assistance the next morning. “Please” you told him and with a sharp nod he was out of the room. Sam left a quick kiss on Eileen’s lips then one on your forehead before quickly following after him.

You watched the door where they’d disappeared for several seconds before Eileen touched your arm gently and you jumped which pulled a small smile to her face “Are you ok?” she asked so you nodded then turned your head to look at her fully “I was in love with him wasn’t I?” she slowly nodded. You let out a breath then leaned your head back against the pillows before asking “How did that shifter case turn out anyways?” she laughed then went into the story talking and signing what had happened trying to catch you up to speed without overwhelming you.

------

Sam found Dean sitting in the library at one of the long tables around three in the morning. There was a bottle of bourbon in front of him and a glass with a piece of ice watering down what of the brown liquid was in it. “Couldn’t sleep?” he asked, pulling the chair out across from Dean after grabbing himself a glass. Dean cut his eyes up at him “Would you be able to if it was Eileen?” “No” Sam wasn’t even going to attempt to lie, Dean knew him too well. “I don’t want to put any stress on her because she doesn’t remember” 

“You’re not. She knows now that you’re not mad that she doesn’t remember. Give Eileen a little time to ease her into the last few years besides Doctor Rhodes said her memory could be fully back within a couple weeks” “Or a couple years” Dean interrupted which earned him a glare from Sam “If you’ve ever had faith in anything..have faith in Y/N” “What if this is nature’s way of a course correction? She deserves better than me and maybe this is the universe trying to say that” 

Sam reached over and pulled the glass out of Dean’s grip then moved the bottle for good measure before saying “The only thing this says is that assholes shouldn’t drink and drive. She’s coming home in a couple days Dean and the familiar setting may help her memory..Rowena is getting there with the spells especially now that she knows to tweak it to memory wise. We’re gonna get her memory back Dean..we will”  “I hope you’re right Sam, I really do”

------

Today was a big step in the right direction. You were finally checking out the hospital to head home. Eileen had mentioned Cas would be at the bunker when you got there so that meant at least for your physical wounds you could get healed, who knows maybe angel mojo would effect your memory as well? Not likely but it didn’t hurt to hope did it?

When the nurse knocked on the door she smiled to see you were tying your sneakers onto your feet. Eileen had stayed in the room with you while Dean went to pull the impala around to the exit you’d be coming out of. “Must I ride in the wheelchair? I mean I think I’m capable of walking” you asked and she grimaced “Sorry Mrs Evanson it’s hospital policy” Eileen winked at you then teased “Besides you get to ride in style out” riding in style was the collection of get well soon items that had found their way to your room from your friends. The one you liked the best was the little stuffed wolves that Garth and Bess had sent by Donna. The nurses didn’t quite understand the significance of them but you’d seen even a small smile work it’s way onto Dean’s face. Over the next few days though it was only supposed to be the four of you at the bunker well plus Cas. You weren’t being anti-social but you could also only bare so much guilt at a time from not remembering certain things.

Eileen bumped your arm and when you glanced her way she signed “Stop it” “You don’t read minds” you replied and she winked “No but you I can read” you sighed and climbed into the wheelchair while Eileen grabbed the bag carrying your presents. Sam was back at the bunker apparently switching your belongings to a different room. Eileen had let it slip that he offered to do it so Dean wouldn’t have to.

“Take me away” you told the nurse who smiled “I can say you have remained in good spirits the entire time you’ve been here and that bodes quite well for your recovery” you shrugged your good shoulder as she pushed you out the door “I can wallow or deal. I always work better by gritting my teeth and doing what I gotta do regardless”

------

The sun was bright in the sky when you finally were wheeled out of the exit. When Dean saw the three of you he quickly came around to open the passenger door and moved to help you but stopped just sigh of touching you then looked at your face for the ok. When you reached for his hand his whole body seemed to relax slightly “Mrs Evanson you have a follow up for a scan in three weeks but if any new symptoms occur such as headaches, blurry vision, dizziness feel free to come in before and if any pain outside the expected occurs feel free to come back in” 

“She will” Dean and Eileen answered in unison so you shot the nurse a smile “I have a lot of people looking after me. I’ll be fine”

After you were in the passenger seat the nurse waved then headed back inside. Eileen climbed in the backseat behind you and reached up to pat your shoulder reassuringly while Dean walked around to climb in the driver’s seat. “Ready to go?” he asked and you nodded “Let’s get home”

------

You vaguely remembered the internal set up of the bunker. You’d been there a time or two and even stayed the night once but as far as knowing it as well as you should considering how long you’d apparently been calling the bat cave home? You were far from it.

Eileen headed down the stairs first followed by Dean then you walking slowly down. Everything in the map room was pretty much how you remembered it including the angel sitting at the table talking to Sam who smiled when he saw the three of you “Y/N” you pulled him into a hug as best as you could “You’re a sight for sore eyes there Cas” he ducked his head and started to explain “I couldn’t exactly come to the hospital to heal you” “I understand Cas. Just saying it’s good to see you” he nodded then looked to your left arm “Can I?” “Please” you replied with an excited smile.

Cas had healed you before but it was always a bit surreal. He laid his hand palm down on your forehead and you felt the warmth spread throughout your body. You closed your eyes and felt your shoulder stitch itself back and the tender spot in your head from the fractured skull fade to a dull ache then disappeared all together.

When you opened your eyes everyone in the room was staring at you expectantly. You tried to force memories of being with Dean into your mind but they refused to come. You shook your head sadly “Healed me physically” “I’m sorry Y/N. Memory is something different than physical injuries” Cas apologized but you shook your head “No Cas. Thank you. Since the physical part is no longer an issue I can start trying to concentrate on my memory”

You didn’t miss the disappointed look in Dean’s eyes and apparently neither did Eileen because she touched your arm “Y/N why don’t I show you your room?” you smiled appreciatively at her “Sounds good. Cas are you staying?” he shook his head “No I’ve got to get back” you hugged him again “In that case be careful out there and thank you again” 

------

You heard the three guys talking while you let Eileen direct you down the hall and tried to block it out. One worry at a time. She pointed to one door “That’s mine and Sam’s room” then pointed to the next door “This one is empty” the door a little further down the hall she pointed to “Um this is Dean’s room” you swallowed hard at the unadded words which were “Until a few days ago this was your room as well” and followed her down to the room right to Dean’s “This one is yours”

You walked in behind her and looked around the room. You recognized the weapons laid about as your own. That was definitely your jacket tossed across the chair in the corner. A black blanket with red swirls was folded on the foot of the bed. When you touched it she smiled “That’s your blanket you usually want. Dean’s been using it but he got me to wash it and fold it for you” you nodded feeling very much overwhelmed “Um Eileen is it ok if I say I want to be alone?” she nodded “Of course. I’ll be in the library with the boys, your phone is on the charger so if you need me cause you know hollering for me won’t work” you managed a small laugh at that and signed “Thank you” since you know had use of both hands again.

She walked out and shut the door gently behind her. You sat on the edge of the bed and looked around the room. There was a since of familiarity tugging at you being in the bunker but you weren’t sure if it was true or just the fact of your own desire to remember. After a while you started feeling tired so you laid down across the bed pulling your blanket over you. A small nap wouldn’t hurt then maybe you could wander around a bit after everyone else went to bed.

------

You weren’t sure how long you’d been asleep when you heard a small knock at your door. You sat up smoothing a hand over your head “Yeah?” then kicked yourself when you realized it could be Eileen but the door opened before you could cross over to it and it was Sam standing in your doorway instead “Dean and Eileen ran into town to grab some food and a few other things we needed. I had to convince them both I would check on you” you smiled at that then stepped back so he could come into the room.

He sat down on the chair that your jacket was draped across so you sat down on the foot of the bed right across from him “How is he?” you asked and Sam raised an eyebrow “How are you?”

You sighed “Apparently I am in a stable relationship and can’t remember past being friends. At least Cas could get the wounds on the outside healed?” he nodded then glanced around before rubbing at the back of his neck “He’s ok” “Sam” you warned so he half smiled “He’s blaming himself of course. You were on the phone with him when the wreck happened” “Christ could it get any worse?” you groaned and Sam leaned up to gently touch your leg “Yeah. You could’ve died. We can deal with this. I know we can” you nodded and laid your hand on top of his “Thanks Sam” he smiled “So do you want to check out the rest of the bunker while it’s just the two of us or go back to sleep?”

“Can I sneek a peek in Dean’s room?” he shrugged “Hell why not?” You followed him out into the hall and stopped him right as he put his hand on the door leading into Dean’s room “Are you sure I should?” He nodded “Yeah. It may help” you took a breath and followed him in. The room didn’t look that much different then the one they had moved your things into at first then on second glance the differences popped out to you.

There was your shotgun on the wall underneath Dean’s. A photo of you, him, Eileen and Sam was on the nightstand. A few albums that were clearly your taste in music was next to his radio and there were two sets of headphones instead of one. You walked over slowly and picked up the photo. The boys were sitting on Jody’s couch and from the looks of it had pulled you and Eileen down into their lap probably seconds before the photo was snapped considering you and her were both laughing. “It was the day Alex got into nursing school” Sam explained coming to stand next to you looking over your shoulder at the photo. 

“We all look so happy” you whispered running your fingertips across Dean’s face. “You’ll get your memory back just give it time” he replied and you sighed then sat the photo down “I know. Let’s check out the rest of the bunker so maybe I can have my nerve enough to face Dean by the time they get back”

------

You had made your way into the library by the time Dean and Eileen came back from town. The few times you could remember coming here you’d been impressed by the extensive collection of lore this place held. You trailed your fingers along the spines of the books reading different titles. “I think you’ve read most of the books in here at least once” you heard from behind you and turned to see Dean leaned against the doorway watching you with a small smile on his face.

You sighed and said “Hopefully I’ll actually remember reading them sooner rather than later...well and other things too” the last part you added in a whisper but you saw the way his expression changed “Y/N I don’t care how long it takes I’m not going anywhere. You may not remember the last few years right now but I do, I know this is worth fighting for” “So you don’t blame yourself then?” you asked crossing your arms over your chest and saw the barest hint of a grin pulling at his lips again “Ok that look is too familiar and I’m guessing by you asking me that you’ve talked to Sam while we were gone?”

You nodded “Dean they said a drunk driver hit me. It wasn’t your fault hell if I hadn’t been on the phone with you it could've been a lot before all of you knew what had happened to me.” He nodded slowly “Not like you have always had a habit of kicking my ass if I’m too hard on myself” that made you laugh lightly “Ok that I do remember and yes someone needs to!” 

He nodded back towards the kitchen “We got some food. Eileen tried to remember what your favorite was but couldn’t quite remember so we got a few different things” You smiled “I’m sure I’ll like whatever I’ve never really been picky” the two of you stood there after that staring at each other for a few heartbeats before you heard Sam call yours and Dean’s names “Guessing that’s our cue to come eat?” “Guessing so” 

------

You sat next to Eileen at the table turned halfway towards her so if you said anything she wouldn’t have to turn to read your lips. Sam was sitting across from her and Dean was across from you. You always loved california rolls but now you were simply pushing them around in the little tray. “Not hungry?” Sam asked motioning to your plate. You shrugged “Guess not. Want them?” Eileen reached over before Sam could move “I’ll take them” you laughed at the look on Sam’s face “Snooze ya lose Winchester”

You glanced over at Dean’s plate to see the burger in front of him was barely touched as well “Dean you’re not gonna eat?” he shrugged “Not that hungry” you sighed and drank the last little bit of your lemonade then stood up “I think I’m gonna grab a shower and call it an early night” “If you need anything” Eileen started and you nodded then signed “I know”  Dean glanced up so you smiled “Night Dean” “Night Y/N” “Night Sam” you called over your shoulder before you walked out the kitchen and heard him say “Night” as you stepped into the hall.

------

Everything felt wrong. The bed felt wrong, your clothes felt wrong. There was a gaping hole craving the memories of the last three years and there was nothing you could do. You tossed and turned most of the night until finally calling it.

You dug around and found a thicker pair of socks so you pulled them onto your feet then grabbed the black and red blanket to wrap around your shoulders before stepping out into the hallway. You weren’t sure what part of the bunker you were headed to but you hoped maybe to clear the confusion in your head. The library called to you so you let your feet carry you in that direction.

You walked aimlessly around the rows of books letting your fingers graze some of them. God there was everything from classic literature that book collectors around the world would sell their souls for all the way to books describing just how bad of an idea that would be and why. You ended up not picking a book and instead just pulled out one of the chairs at the table and sat down.

You smiled when you saw Sam and Dean’s initials carved into the tabletop. It matched where they’d carved their names in the impala back when they were kids. You traced Dean’s initials and seriously considered waking him up to talk but decided against it. Just like you needed time to adjust you were quite certain he needed some time too. One moment he’d been with a woman for three years the next that woman didn’t even have a memory of a shared kiss.

You sighed and pushed away from the table. You had seen a laptop in your room hopefully it wasn’t password protected,maybe you could watch a movie or something.

Within a week and a half of being released from the hospital you were going absolutely stir crazy and what was even worse you knew everyone was sitting out of cases to be there with you.

You walked out of your room after grabbing a shower and headed towards the kitchen. Sam and Eileen were normally up before Dean you’d learned so you were hoping it was just the two of them again. When you walked around the corner you nearly froze in your tracks to see Dean pouring a cup of coffee. He cut his eyes up and almost smiled when he saw you then motioned with the coffee in his hand “Want a cup?” You mentally kicked yourself as a reminder to speak and forced a small smile onto your face “Please” 

He nodded and turned to grab another cup. You stood there not missing the looks Sam and Eileen were sharing while Dean poured the coffee and held the cup out to you. You took it from him letting your fingers barely touch his hand “Thanks Dean” “Sugar’s on the counter and creamer’s in the fridge” he replied with a tight smile then walked over to sit next to Sam.

You couldn’t help but over the conversation between the three of them which consisted of the fact that Donna apparently needed help and that Garth had asked Sam if him and Dean could check in on some strange occurrences. “Why don’t you all go?” you asked turning to face the three of them and repeating yourself in asl for Eileen. “We don’t want to leave you alone” you nodded slowly then said “I have a cell phone. Sam just gave me a new one all set up yesterday. Not to mention I’m in literally one of the safest places on earth. I think I can manage for a day or two. Seriously I feel horrible that I’m keeping all three of you cooped up, go I’ll be fine”

The three of them knew you well enough to know that if you had your mind set on something you were far too stubborn to let it go that easily. Sam and Eileen shared a few hushed words followed by Sam and Dean having a whispering match before Dean finally sighed loudly “Fine! I’ll meet you outside in twenty”

You watched him walk out then glanced at Sam questioningly “What was that about?” “He still doesn’t feel comfortable leaving you but he agreed to go check out Garth’s lead” Eileen looked up from her phone with a grin “I texted Donna that I’ll come help her and she said to tell you and I quote can’t wait till Y/N is back in action. I miss her face” you laughed lightly and said “Well be careful and tell Donna I miss her face too”

------

Sam and Eileen left to go grab what they needed so you wandered back towards your room but stopped when you saw Dean’s bedroom door was open. You knocked lightly on it and half a second later he stepped around it and stopped in his tracks when he realized it was in fact you and not Sam or Eileen. “Y/N..something wrong?” you shook your head “No I was just wondering if maybe I could talk to you just for a second?” 

He stepped to the side and waved a hand into the room “Of course” you walked in and sat in one of the chairs at the small table in his room so he sat across from you. You took a deep breath before saying “Dean..if my memory doesn’t come back” “It will” he cut you off and you couldn’t help but smile at just how certain he sounded “Please let me talk” “Sorry go ahead”

You reached across the table and grabbed his hand. He stared down at your intertwined fingers as you started to speak again “If my memory doesn’t come back and you want to move on there’s no hard feelings” his eyes flew up to yours “Sweetheart I knew you’d hit your head hard but damn I didn’t realize it’d done you that bad” “What?” you asked with a shocked laugh. 

He slowly raised your joined hands up to his mouth before just barely letting his lips brush across your knuckles “Y/N listen to me good here darling....I love you more than I ever dreamt possible. A future for me? Naw I never really thought about it before you but since the moment you first told me you love me I feel like maybe one day I can actually be the man worthy of you. I’m never walking away from you. If it takes two months or twenty years, I’ll still be right here” you had tears in your eyes by the time he’d finished talking “Christ no wonder I’m in love with you. Who would’ve thought Dean Winchester is a romantic at heart” he chuckled before saying “Only for you sweetheart..only for you” 

You pulled your hand from his and saw his face fall slightly before you said “Come home in one piece?” “Nothing could keep me from you” he replied and you had a sense of almost dejavu as if that was something that was said a lot between the two of you but you didn’t want to ask and get his hopes up just for dejavu. 

“Dean..you ready to go?” Sam called from the hall but stopped when he saw the two of you sitting across from each other “Or we can wait. A few minutes wont hurt” you held Dean’s eyes as you said “No Sam, you two need to get going. I’m gonna go see Eileen off” you stood to walk out but stopped to pat Sam’s shoulder “I expect you both back here just the way you’re leaving”

“Bye Dean” “Bye Y/N” you smiled at Sam then headed to tell Eileen your usual parting and wish her a safe hunt.

------

Everyone was due back to the bunker within a few hours so you were currently folding laundry in your room. Things were starting to hold a sense of familiarity to them but you weren’t certain if it was true or if you were simply wanting to remember so badly you were tricking your own brain into saying it remembered when it truly didn’t.

You’d started texting with Jody, Alex and Claire. You felt horrible that you didn’t remember Claire’s girlfriend Kaia or the newest addition to the wayward daughters as you called them Patience but the girls were more than understanding and were wading in little by little to catch you up on any and all memories involving them. 

Your phone chimed from where it sat next to the bed so you walked over to pick it up and saw a text from Sam which read “We’re two hours away and Eileen is an hour out” you smiled knowing everyone was safe and texted back “Make it back in one piece and then I’ll be happy” then sat the phone down and returned to putting your laundry away.

You pulled out one drawer and stopped. Your socks and undergarments were in it but you had a flash of t-shirts being in the top drawer. Must have simply been mistaken. You finished up then headed into the library where you’d been scrolling through news websites to catch up.

------

You must have been invested in the article you were currently reading because when Eileen tapped on your shoulder you jumped. When you looked up she said “You’re a hunter and I scared you!” “You didn’t make any noise! Besides my guard is down in here” she shook her head but laughed “Nice to see you in a good mood” you motioned around “It’s starting to feel like a sense of being at home here” you knew you could confide in her without it reaching Dean and possibly getting his hopes up for nothing.

Her smile grew as she pulled out the chair next to you and sat down “That’s really good news” you and her sat there talking for the next while and were still talking when you heard the bunker door open so you signed “Our boys are home” she smiled and glanced over her shoulder about the time Sam and Dean walked down the stairs but both of your faces fell when you saw the cuts and scratches littering both of their faces.

She was on her feet to Sam’s side and without hesitation you were at Dean’s side before you could even think about it. “What the hell happened?” you asked gently touching the deepest cut that ran right across Dean’s left cheek “Couple witches hexed a couple vamps. Made them a little harder to kill. No big deal sweetheart” he replied flinching slightly as you turned his head to look at the different cuts and you shook your head then glanced at Eileen “You got your idiot cause I’m gonna go patch this one up and call Cas to see when he came come through the heal them” she nodded so you grabbed Dean’s hand and pulled him behind you out of the library and down the hall to his bedroom.

------

Dean sat on the side of his bed while you fussed over the cuts on his face and neck. “Did you kill the witches? Because if not I’m gonna find them and shove their damn broomsticks up their asses” you finished cleaning the cuts and stopped when you realized he was staring at you

“What?” he shook his head letting just the barest hint of a smile play on his lips “I love when you’re all fiery” when you dipped your head just enough that hair fell in front of your face he knew that was one of your tells that you’d gotten embarrassed so he reached up to push the hair back gently and felt his heart flip when you actually leaned into his touch “I love everything about you Y/N. I don’t mean to embarrass you or make you feel weird about it since you can’t remember but you patching me up and fussing about me being hurt? It feels normal or normal for us anyways” you covered his hand with your own and smiled “I want us back Dean”

“We’ll get there sweetheart. Rowena said a few more days and a few more continents she should have her hands on everything she needs” you nodded then pulled away from him slowly “I need to put this first aid kit up” he watched you move around and wanted to say something that would make you feel better but really didn’t have an idea as to what to say.

You stopped at the doorway and glanced back at him “Is it weird if I ask you to take me for a ride in the impala?” he shook his head “Not at all. When do you want to go?” your smile pulled one to his own face “Let me grab my jacket” you glanced at his dresser for a second then added “Are your t-shirts in the top drawer?” he looked between you and the dresser then nodded slowly “Yeah..why?” “No reason” you replied then went in search of your jacket and to return the first aid kit to the kitchen.

------

You weren’t sure where Dean was headed but sitting next to him watching him drive felt so natural. You’d known him for years but it was like your heart was remembering even when your brain was refusing to. “Want to pull over or just keep driving? It’s a quarter moon but it’s pretty bright out if you want to park and talk?” he suggested and you nodded “Please”

You watched as he found a pull off and drove back to an open field. When he killed the engine he cut his eyes at you “You coming?” you smiled and climbed out behind him. He walked to the front of the car then sat on the hood leaned back against the windshield so you sat next to him making sure your boots were hanging off the side to not scratch the paint. Thousands of stars were dotted across the sky and although the moon was only a quarter it was bright. You could hear a few crickets far off and a slight breeze was in the air not enough to make it cold but enough to make your jacket comfortable.

You cut your eyes at him twice before he said “You can lean your head over on me Y/N. I won’t bite” “What if I asked you to?” you joked but had another sense of dejavu hit you. He pulled you over onto his chest leaning further back while you got comfortable “You know you said that to me the first night we slept together” he spoke after a moment.

It was the first time he’d actually talked about your relationship. You knew it was because he didn’t want to push your memory. You had your head laying against his chest and could hear his heart beating steadily under you. “Who kissed who first?” you asked and his answering laugh vibrated through your entire body “Believe it or not you kissed me first” you turned to look at him and he shrugged so you asked “Tell me?” 

He nodded and leaned his head back to stare at the night sky “We were fresh off a possession case. Me and Sam had been working it and you rolled through nearby. Eileen was with the twins working a case so you offered to help us. After it was all said and done Sam headed back to the hotel but me and you decided to grab a beer” you hadn’t realized just how much you were hanging onto his every word until he grinned “You’re staring there Y/N” “Oh hush. You’re telling me about our first kiss I get to stare” 

“Fair enough” he replied with a nod then continued “Anyways. We got to the bar, grabbed our drinks and then headed to a corner table. We were talking about the job, the life we live. You were the most beautiful woman in the place and you were sitting there in jeans and one of my flannels since your shirt had gotten torn during the fight and you had a scratch right across the top of your collarbone that flashed when you moved just the right way. I’d been trying to figure out a way to ask you if you’d ever consider being with another hunter for weeks by that point. You got up to grab us another round and I admit I watched your ass while you walked to the bar but you hadn’t even gotten the beer yet when some drunk asshole decided to grab your ass”

“How did that go over?” you asked pretty much already knowing the answer. Dean tilted his head with a hint of a smirk “I may have broken his jaw in a few different places. Luckily the bartender saw everything so she snuck us over the bar and out the back about the time the police were coming in the front. We hightailed it out of there and headed back to the hotel. I walked you to your door even though you were right next to us. You told me you could’ve handled it and at first I thought you were pissed at me for stepping in but then you added that you thought it was the sexiest thing you’d ever seen. You kissed me then asked if I wanted to grab coffee the next morning before we all headed our different directions”

The happiness in Dean’s eyes as he spoke about the two of you made your heart ache. You loved him, that much you were sure of even if you couldn’t remember the details as to why. “Was it just me for you from there on?” you asked and when he looked at you god your heart skipped more than a few beats at the emotion those green eyes held “No one else would’ve stood a chance” you leaned closer to him and just barely let your lips brush against his in a tentative kiss. When he didn’t push you away you deepened it moving closer to him. He groaned into the kiss when your hands slid across his chest coming up to play with the hair at the nape of his neck.

One of his hands came to grip your thigh closest to him and he gave it a tug pulling you on top of him never breaking the kiss. You straddled his waist breaking from his lips to kiss down his neck. The grip on your hips tightened when you kissed on top of his pulse point “Y/N...sweetheart..baby stop” you froze the moment he said stop and looked at him in confusion “What’s wrong?” he swallowed hard before saying “Don’t get me wrong because fuck I’ve missed kissing you but we can’t do this. Not until you get more of your memory back. The moment you do I promise to keep you in bed for days but for now we can’t”

You nodded and left another quick kiss on his lips before sliding off of him and the hood of the car. He stood up after you and wrapped both arms around you “I love you Y/N” you nodded leaning back against him “I know Dean” the two of you stood there in silence for the longest just enjoying being close to each other until you shivered. “Let’s get back” he said so you nodded with a sigh “Will you watch a movie or something with me when we get back?” he nodded and kissed your cheek “Of course”

You paced across the floor glancing towards the table in the center of the room every now and then. The redhead working over the large silver bowl stopped in the middle of a movement “Y/N..dear I have grown quite fond of you actually but if you don’t stop that incessant pacing I will lock you out until I need you” 

You held your hands up defensively “Sorry Rowena. I guess I’m just nervous” “Understandably but just take a breath” you nodded and sat down at the table across the room. She smiled then went back to her work. You looked up when the door opened and gave a small smile to Eileen “The boys are on their way back” “It’ll be done before they get here” Rowena said not looking up so you repeated it to Eileen who questioned why your eyes got wider.

Eileen sat down next to you and drew you into a conversation about a few hunt years back and that managed to keep your attention until Rowena cleared her throat. The both of you looked up so she waved you over “It’s time” Eileen walked next to you so you gave her hand a small squeeze before stepping over to the table “Give me your hand” Rowena spoke so you held your hand out palm up. She picked up a silver dagger and slid it across your skin. You watched as your blood dripped onto the mixture in the bowl and it glowed a deep silver.

Rowena spoke the incantation of which you only caught half the words because while some was latin the rest was a language you didn’t recognize. After a moment the silver turned to a shimmering black. Rowena dipped a red wine glass into the bowl and held it out “Drink it all” you looked at the liquid and swallowed hard. You’d drank worse before. You looked at Eileen who nodded so you toasted her and Rowena “Here’s to our health ladies” then tipped the entire glass back in one go. “How do you feel?” Eileen asked and you started to say you felt fine then the world took on a fuzzy haze and you felt yourself falling right before your vision went black.

------

“Y/N..wake up..sweetheart” you could hear Dean’s voice and forced your eyes open. “She’s awake” he breathed in relief. You were laying on a makeshift pallet in the armory. “Told you I know what I’m doing” Rowena chastised then crouched down into your view. “Y/N..how do you feel dear?” you looked at Dean before answering Rowena “I feel amazing. I remember everything” you could hear Eileen and Sam both thanking Rowena but your eyes were glued to Dean who whispered “I love you Y/N” you pulled him down into a kiss before whispering “I love you too Dean. Nothing could keep me from you either”

Tagging @girl-next-door-writes for the bingo challenge and @akshi8278 cause it's Dean