thelibranarchives - Tumblr blog

[thelibranarchives]

JC: I'm a peaceful person.

WWX: You threw a chair at me earlier.

JC: Which is a peaceful compromise from the table I initially wanted to throw.

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Wei Wuxian: Good morning, grumpy Uncle.

Lan Qiren: Good morning, problem child.

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WWX: What do you want for breakfast, Lan Zhan?

LWJ: *unties his headband*

WWX, groaning: I meant food!

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OZZ: Is stabbing someone immoral?

JL: Not if they consent to it.

LJY: Depends on who you're stabbing.

LSZ: YES!? What is wrong with you guys?

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How Remus ended up with Sirius in his arms:

Sirius: Meant to say "hold on for a second" and "give me a minute" and it came out as "hold me for a second".

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LWJ has some of the most creative bedroom moves ever known to mankind.

And they are known to mankind because WWX can't stop gushing about them.

Much to the embarassment and dismay of Lan juniors.

JC is affected vicariously through JL who excitedly and disgustedly and angrily tells his uncle all the stories he heard during his vacation at Cloud Recesses (they are mostly his adventures with his friends but WWX's antics also get included somehow).

So every summer after JL returns from his vacay, JC goes into seclusion for a week to forget what he heard.

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LWJ, in his diary: God didn't know what he was doing when he created me.

LWJ: I was supposed to be a loner but then he got the idea of Wei Wuxian.

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LWJ: Uncle always has a problem with what I'm doing.

LXC: Probably because you're always doing WWX.

LWJ: *chokes*

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help i can’t stop making these

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Lan Qiren, eyeing LWJ critically: Good boys go to heaven.

LWJ, eyeing WWX hungrily: But bad boys bring heaven to you.

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Wei Wuxian: Can you help me with this zipper, Lan Zhan?

Lan Wangji: Mn.

Wei Wuxian:

Wei Wuxian: I meant up!

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Headcanon that every year around the time of the anniversary of the Battle of Nightless City, Lan Wangji becomes quieter than usual. He closes himself off and he's seen doing only three things- night hunting, taking care of Lan Yuan and meditating in the cave beneath the cold springs. It's almost like a ritual he religiously adheres to. This goes on for ten years. After Wei Wuxian returns and starts living at the Cloud Recesses, Lan Wangji's ritual undergoes slight changes. The Lan juniors have started organising and conducting night hunts. Wei Wuxian is back in flesh, in Gusu, in his Jingshi. Lan Wangji cooks all of Wei Wuxian's favourite foods, takes him places in and around Cloud Recesses, and is extra tender when he bathes him and feeds him. At the end of the day when night falls and quietness envelops the Cloud Recesses, Wangji stares for a long time at the sleeping form in his arms, peppers gentle kisses all over his face and hugs his Wei Ying just a bit tighter before falling asleep contentedly.

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Arthur: Don't be so stubborn, Merlin. It's obvious. You resemble them both so much! Why can't you see it? Use your eyes!

Merlin:

I hope nobody has thought of this before. Arthur said that “Dragoon” looked familiar and we all know it’s because Merlin has the same eyes. It would have been so funny if Arthur theorized that Dragoon the Great was related to Merlin.

Arthur: We need to find someone who knows magic. Merlin is your wizard grandfather available?

Merlin: For the last time I never knew my grandparents!

Arthur: …So he’s a long lost relative is what you’re saying.

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If you think Victor Nikiforov always walks with one hand wrapped around Yuuri’s waist, always has a tiny album of their photos in his coat pocket and always carries a lens cleaning liquid with him, you are absolutely right.

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James Sirius' first letter to Harry from Hogwarts: Merlin, Dad! How did you never tell me "exactly" how cool my name was?

Lily Luna's first letter to Harry from Hogwarts: Am I the only one who has the most normal name in our family, Dad?

Albus Severus' first letter to Harry from Hogwarts: I'd like to know at what point you decided that Albus Severus was a name any child should have, LET ALONE YOUR OWN! Bravest man, my a**!

Scorpius' first letter to Draco from Hogwarts: I'm curious, Father, if my name would have been Chimera Phoenix if scorpion and abraxan were not animals.

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Draco: Lol, no. I don't have a crush on Potter. Harry Potter.

Draco: The boy who lived.

Draco: The scarhead.

Draco: The four eyed git.

Draco: The messy haired prat.

Draco: The oblivious idiot.

Pansy:

Blaise:

Draco: It's just that I stare at him and when he's not here or does some mischief without me or doesn't stare back at me, it ruins my day.

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Draco: I have feelings for you

Ginny *baffled*: you do??

Draco: yeah, I feel like you’re trying to take my mans