#incorrect marauders textposts

[moonycriesdies]

James : What is your biggest weakness?

Regulus: I can be uncooperative.

James: Okay, can you give me an example?

Regulus: No.

[propussyslayer]

sirius: so what do you do for a living

remus: i hunt and kill zombies

sirius: the fuck no you don't

remus: have you ever seen one?

sirius: no?

remus: then you are fucking welcome

[maxdibert]

Lily: Well, Severus, at least the Marauders don’t use dark magic.

Severus: Well, Lily, then I guess I can slit their throats with a razor blade as long as i don't use dark magic for it, right?

[wo1fst4r]

regulus who insults james every chance he gets when they bump into each other

and james who just stares at him lovingly every time, thinking: “merlin, even if he insulted me every single day, i’d still thank him for the privilege of hearing his voice.”

[jiangyanlissidepiece]

Little Harry: what were you and Papa like when you first met?

James, smiling: we instantly hit it off!

Regulus: uh, no. I threatened to rip out your eyes and feed them to you.

James: ah, but that was when I knew you were the one.

[deathnguts]

[nikolai-alexi]

Sirius: inside of you, there are two wolves…inside of me there are two twinks fighting over a cigarette

[quillandparchmentimagines]

Remus: How long did Mcgonagall ground you two for?

James: Two weeks.

Y/N: 'One per idiot.'

[kairospy]

* Moments after Sirius finds out about jegulus *

James: I swear I didn’t mean to—

Sirius: so you tripped and landed on his dick is what I’m hearing???

[loonyloopylupin96]

[b-u-g-g-y]

Sirius: *Trying and failing to wink at Remus*

Remus: Are you…flirting with me?

Sirius: I’m fucking trying. Is it working?

Remus: Sadly, yes.

[tea-blankets-andstars]

marauders textposts as things my friends have said p3

James & siri: talking about cars

Remus: *whispers* god i feel so small, gay and poor

[propussyslayer]

james "oh i guess i am a bisexual" potter

regulus "swallowed by the tension winding up in my own household, i feel i must fill my duties as the true heir to The Noble House of Black and provide them with an offspri- is that James Potter half naked after quidditch practice oh lord im abouta-" black

[jegulusposts]

The Marauders as things my friends have said - Part 2

James: What pronouns do you want us to use today Pads?

Sirius: I’m not a gender, I’m just angry.

[wo1fst4r]

walburga black, who never asks for help (especially not from a halfblood), sends a letter to remus lupin asking him to "talk some sense into sirius" because, apparently, sirius has been nothing but trouble at hogwarts—and she knows remus is the only one sirius listens to.

remus, thinking she’s genuinely concerned, takes it seriously and confronts sirius about his behavior. sirius, absolutely mortified (because of course his mother knows about his massive crush on remus), stops causing mischief for an entire month out of sheer embarrassment.

[jiangyanlissidepiece]

Regulus: I’ve been working really hard at unmasking lately

Dorcas: woah no way are you serious?

Regulus: no that’s my brother

Dorcas:

Regulus:

Dorcas: if this is the real you I’m going to have to ask you to put the mask back on