#incorrect drarry quotes

[daddiesdrarryy]

Pansy: All you need is for a Gryffindor to like you, Draco. If they like you, the rest will trust you, and then you can date Potter!

Draco: Fine. How do I get these wankers to like me?

Pansy: …

Draco: Don’t call them wankers

Pansy: Good instinct!

[crackishincorrecthp]

Hermione: You lying, cheating, piece of shit! Ron: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD Hermione: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING HARRY WITH ME Ginny, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now Draco: No, no, it's getting really entertaining now! Pansy: I never thought Hermione would be that competitive! Luna: I always thought Ron would be the one to get Harry in the divorce Harry: Hermione is scarier, she would definitely get me in the divorce

[yourgalgremlin]

From this

[author-david-jimenez]

Wolfstar raising Harry

Remus: Okay, Harry, what is this? *holds up banana*

Baby Harry: Fruit

Remus: Well, technically yes. How about this? *holds up apple*

Harry: Fruit

Remus: Again, you are technically right

Sirius: *enters the apartment* Hello, how are my favorite boys doing?

Harry: *points at Sirius* Fruit

Remus: *barley containing laughter* Most definitely right!

[incorrect-drarry-quote]

Draco, eating breakfast: Oh, hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.

Harry, who walked out of his bedroom in his house into his kitchen: Maybe we would, if you would STOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE

[jiangyanlissidepiece]

Harry, at brunch with his in-laws: where did Draco go? I just left for like 5 seconds???

Narcissa: he’s trying to fight the peacocks again

Draco, from outside: REMEMBER ME, YOU BASTARDS?

Lucius: we really should’ve sent him to therapy

[gryfferin-gaybies]

Gryffindor Student: *sighs* Professor Potter is so hot

Their friend: careful. Don't let Professor Malfoy hear you say that.

Draco: *walking by, trying not to laugh* yeah I hear that Professor Malfoy can be very territorial

[mono-chromia]

Draco: why do you move around like that?

Harry: like what?

Draco: like you're a little animal. you're scurrying. why are you scurrying around.

Harry: ??? is that a crime? what if i like to scurry

Draco:

Harry: god forbid a man has a hobby

[lunar-serpentinite]

draco if he was part of the ppl who polyjuiced into harry : if you can't fuck em, become em [chugs the potion down]

harry in the bg : what the fuck

[cheridraco]

draco: can you like fuck the sad out of me

harry: how about you share what's upsetting you instead

[accio-sriracha]

*Drarry arguing years after the sectumsempra incident*

~~~♤~~~

Draco: You literally tried to kill me.

Harry: But you didn't die, soooo

Draco: THATS WHY I SAID T R I E D.

Harry: Do you even know what attempted murder is, Draco?

Draco: ARE YOU TRYING TO FUCKING GASLIGHT ME RIGHT NOW?

Blaise: *walks into the room* What's going on?

Ron: Draco's whining because Harry SUPPOSEDLY tried to kill him and Harry is just trying to live his hot girl summer life.

Pansy: Harry literally tried to kill Draco when they were like 16.

Ron: *Munching on snacks* Slander.

~~~♤~~~

[daddiesdrarryy]

Harry: I’m sorry I tried to kill you

Draco: It’s fine, Potter, but next time you should try harder

[crackishincorrecthp]

Harry: I never tell people off the bat that I'm bi. I wait. I wait until they say some homophobic shit and then I laugh and I'm like "you know I'm bi right?" and watch the look of terror on their faces Draco: Draco: Please marry me

[yourgalgremlin]

DRACO: If it isn’t The-Boy-Who-Lisps

HARRY: Oh look, it’s The-Bitch-Who-Bottoms

PANSY: HAH!

[author-david-jimenez]

*Draco and Harry having a screaming match*

Harry: I hate you!

Draco: I hate you more!

Harry: I want to punch you in the face!

Draco: I want to pin you against a wall and throttle you!

Harry: I want to see you begging on your knees!

Ron, sobbing: I want to go home

[incorrect-drarry-quote]

Hermione: Do you know what bees make?

Ron: Honey?

Hermione: Yes dear?

[Harry turns to Draco]

Harry: Draco, do you know what bees make?

Draco: Some stupid annoying sound, what the fuck do you want.