twinklethelittlestar

[twinklethelittlestar]

oh my dear friend, my beloved confidant,

as you stand up there looking down at us mortals, I wish you would lift me into your ethereal kingdom and spare me of my agony and despair;

allow me to clear my consciousness and trade my life for one of your dazzling soldiers'; to protect you, to worship you, and to love you, as I have always done, onwards.

[twinklethelittlestar]

I dread the day that I completely let go of the person I used to be, in view of the fact that I do not know if my future self will be a better, healed and kinder version of myself, or conversely a broken soul with a shattered heart, full of dispiritedness and disappointments. I am eager to take a look into the chest, which is for the time being carefully guarded by time's brave soldiers and peer into where my life is going to be steered next. Simultaneously, the relentlessness that haunts me in regard to how the future's mask will mold my face is daunting. I am filled over the top with contradictory thoughts that make my head spin unceasingly, and all this because of something that I, with my mundane mind, cannot properly fathom. I know destiny will eventually take on the wheel and it will blunt the internal wounds conducted by this life that I was inherently born into, yet I cannot help but wonder if I am imagining this outcome, sort of twisted out of shape by hope, in order to not yield to despair, as a comfort, rather than a truth. Am I a hypocrite for blatantly and shamelessly choosing to believe the desired outcome, banishing out of my mind's eye the possibility of a failed future? I have always been a big dreamer, "go big or go home" they would say, and I would never hesitate to act on that. I have been publicly working towards fulfilling my life-long aspirations, but the fear that they will remain mere dreams makes everything in me tremble. What if I am, at the end of the day, not good enough? And more importantly, will I ever be?...

[twinklethelittlestar]

i am forcefully being pushed towards a rebellious retreat to a sadness that goes deeper than the ocean. I feel trialed over and over again, I feel stuck in a loop of malicious consciousness that holds me hostage. my mind plays tricks on me and is praying on my downfall. what is there left to say? no worlds could possibly do justice to the utter spiraling which goes on inside my head. I could not even tell you when I subscribed to this life full of constraints, perpetual anxieties and dispiritedness. I genuinely could not recall ever casting a wish of such nature. I guess destiny worked its wonders and mistakingly rendered me able to carry this burden. Should I feel flattered, angered or consoled?

It feels like the old me, the person who would roam gracefully in the open, who would have absolutely no need for purification of thought, is out of reach nowadays. It is as if someone had sprinkled confetti over my vision, the fluttering bits of colored paper serving as a shroud that allows for her inconspicuous dismissal. I guess that this is merely the natural order of things. We grow up and loathe the changes that further serve as a separation mechanism from your younger self, namely from your purest, most cleansed self. The mind starts to wonder and explore darker places, with darker prospects, which ultimately just steer you even further away.

I have no idea what the future holds for me right now, but I sure hope that the hardships I have had to endure will eventually bloom into a most enchanting garden, full of vividly nuanced flowers swinging in the ginger breeze of the reassuringly icy wind, with birds chirping gleefully as a testament to a new beginning.

[twinklethelittlestar]

the impending audience is what is keeping you from doing what you truly internally desire. do things like no one is watching, they say. so, what about yourself, your own persona? why should you be an exception to the hitherto established rule? once you learn to detach yourself from the activity you are performing, you initiate a process of liberation. the aforementioned will consequently mount to success in your pursuit, and you will at last feel rooted in what you are doing. the takeaway? do not take life so seriously. that is when it gets boring and frankly not worth living, if you allow me to introduce my humble opinion. believe that if you crave something, it is for a propheted reason. the only way to satisfy that craving, to bring it to completion, is to separate your critical mindset and the activity that you are engulfing in. that is when sorcelled transformation takes place.

[twinklethelittlestar]

did you ever wonder why some memories are forgotten, while others reign for an undefined period of time? what is and where does this discrepancy spring from? i recently read an interesting piece that argued that this phenomenon has nothing to do with the memory itself, namely, its nature is frivolous in the process. it is rather the fact that the memory withholds a mirror revealing our bare face, and its deletion comes from the fear of us not wanting to look at it.

I find this concept truly intriguing, and it really left me pondering upon my life and upon both the memories which I so dearly hold close to my heart and those whose deletion would render me joy. testing this theory meant taking off my armor and facing the enemy naked, just like humans were initially presented to the world. nevertheless, it was a pivotal stage in my understanding of the self and in bettering my future self. fear is more often than not the wind that swings us towards the unknown, away from our comfort zone; and I believe that one is so incredibly fortunate to be on the receiving end of such a blessing.

maybe it is true, after all. yet, that begs for more questions. why are we trying to hide from our most authentic self? why are we not fully and wholeheartedly embracing who we are, without the perpetual anxiety deriving from others perceiving us in an unflattering or unwanted manner? why does it matter what they think of you when they haven't seen you at your lowest, when they haven't seen what you have been through all this time? why does it matter what they think, when YOU know that is not who you are?

it doesn't. and this seemingly simple answer can offer great liberation. let's start living for ourselves and worry less about how the rest of the world depicts our parcourse.

let's start living without fear.

[twinklethelittlestar]

we live under the impression that we always have to behave our best, regardless of our surroundings. be on your best behavior, be your highest, most self-assured self in order to succeed in life, they say, for no one rewards those who fail to bring this intrinsic mission to completion.

we are taken in by this misleading statement and thus overlook the fact that it is inherently impossible. we so often hear the saying that nobody is perfect, yet rarely see people referring to this when it comes to bad behavior. nevertheless, I believe it still applies in that sense. you will never be happy all your life, you will never stop complaining altogether, you will never break free from the urge to burst into anger from time to time; and that is okay. that is human.

what we can do, however, is minimize the damage done to our consciousness by become self aware and trying to acknowledge our behavioral outbursts. life does not expect you to be perfect, but it does want you to make the most of it and reach your most desired self; and that is not a perfected persona, it is merely a soul trying to perpetually better itself in order to allow room for self acceptance to grow.

[twinklethelittlestar]

the acceptance of one's surroundings, no further questions asked, is incredibly outlandish to me. what do you mean i am randomly placed on this earth in a moment in time, my life completely laid out in front of me waiting for it to be lived? this progression of spawning is truly disquieting to my being. we, as humans, just go on about our lives taking in the world around us, but do we ever pause and ponder upon the happenstance of our existing at this precise juncture? it is so alien, yet utterly ecstatic if you sleep on it. I could have been born a duchess or a martyr or a future scientist in the year 3000; albeit I inhabit the earth right now. isn't it crazy?

[twinklethelittlestar]

[twinklethelittlestar]

Music as therapy for the soul ( a short article)

Regardless of the constantly developing environment in which we are placed, music has become a constant, so ubiquitous in our day-to-day lives, enough so as to ignite the tendency for us to rely on it in different circumstances. Therefore, the aforementioned statement begs the question: How does music contribute to our quotidian existence?

To begin with, music is a form of art which, in essence, proves to be a means of conveying messages or feelings through an unsubstantial form, pleasing to the ear. It is a way to play around with poetry and rhythm in order to create a masterpiece directed at the masses. Precisely due to its intentionality, music transcends emotional barriers and more often than not finds its way to society’s hearts, allowing the swift tingle of emotion to serenely flow.

Nonetheless, this intuitive connection between music and human emotion is not merely anecdotic. Multiple studies have proved that this art forms allows for internal changes at the level of feelings, therefore producing subsequent emotional reactions intrinsically linked to the symbolic meaning it sets out to convey. I believe we all have been swept off our feet in a trance by a song which so deeply resonated with us that we found ourselves at a loss for words at how such a seemingly ordinary task, namely listening to the lyrics of a song, could provoke so powerful a reaction. Regardless of the genre, the cadence, or even the feeling it bears, there is no denying that music is a powerful tool in generating human emotions.

All things considered, the sole fact that the recorded affairs and thoughts of a person can result in raw embodiments of vulnerability feels terribly reassuring in a world that seems to aim dehumanization.

[twinklethelittlestar]

.

it is overwhelming to be gradually absorbed by the shallow abyss of despair until you find yourself in a never-ending spiral of distress, from which you believe you will never be able to escape alive. "Why me?" you might cry, while slowly closing your eyes in mourning, taking a deep breath to take in the life that seems overtaken by the shadows. you see no exit, no outlet for escapism. the light at the end of the tunnel starts to sound more and more like an old wives' tale, a myth designed to get your hopes up just to set you up for merely more failure, more self-doubt, more agony and adversity.

having been shrouded in the darkness for so long, you begin to lose hope. nonetheless, when all seems lost, that is when you have to start taking action. think about the bigger picture, the deeper purpose of it all; for you see, when you start to swallow in self-pity, the universe or a higher divinity will send you a message embodied as a sliver of hope that manages to aid you out of the tempest's eye. as absurd as it may sound, all you have to do is choose to follow it.

@whiskersofakitten @golden-letters @perfectfeelings

[twinklethelittlestar]

no snowflake ever lands in the wrong place.

[twinklethelittlestar]

the flowers died on monday; and they dragged into the underground kingdom the girl who thought that everyone else's needs were unparalleled compared to her own's. the girl who thought that kindness meant that ripping your heart off your chest is adequate, provided someone tells you they need it; the girl who would spend unnumbered sleepless nights catering to everyone else, but herself.

that fragmentary tender self who wanted nothing but to be regarded as special treating every being with an unnamed warmth, without alas taking into account that every action she took would result in a part of her cracking. that was until one unfortunate, cursed day when she stumbled upon a mirror that unveiled the harsh reality and our vulnerable being stood face to face with a fragmentary self who she did not want to identify.

the dissonance between what she thought her actions meant vs. what they ended up aiding led our "protagonist" to find herself in a troubled state of frenzy, which she could no longer control to the point where a progression of crystal-like tears caressed her cheeks one after the other in an untamed waltz of the human nature. "Why?" she cried. "Why did this happen to me when I brought nothing but goodness everywhere I stepped foot?"

the answer she was looking for would later come to her. the missing piece of the puzzle was indeed the fact that her own persona was left devoid of care, bereft of kindness. Who else was she going to gain it from if not from herself only?

A cocoon hugged her until she no longer felt the outside world until she no longer felt its tedium and troubles. It was only after she learned to offer the love given to others to her own self that a bandaid appeared to cover the wounds that were to heal with time, then the cocoon started to rip, and it revealed a butterfly so beautiful as no other in the universe.

were you to pay attention to this tale you would discover the power of self-respect (do not mistake it for haughtiness for else you are doomed) and that it can turn even the most unfortunate of creatures into a most admired butterfly.

[twinklethelittlestar]

the adventure of a lost soul (diary entry)

I am so inspired by everything I see. I find myself deeply engraved in the artistic realm. Every time I step outside, everytime I open an app, be it Tumblr or pinterest, INSPIRATION AND BLISS come flooding. I have found myself to be fluent in life? It is a rather orphic concept, life. Some people might take that as: I know how to keep myself contained, how to manage life on my own, but you see, my novice understanding leads me to believe that to be fluent in life means to know how to appreciate it. Let go of your rationality and embrace the uncertainty and unknowingness of this deity that life presents itself as, otherwise you will never truly make the most of this gift that you were presented with.

this is the epiphany I wanted to share today, because I feel as though it is important to document this moment in my life when, from now on, I plead to succumb to life's beauty and superbity. I no longer want to live my life roaming frivolously, for that is not living, that is merely existing. In a world full of people that just want to exist, tediously get through each day in hopes of reaching the next one - performing with a sort of checkpoint mindset which they did not know they subscribed to - i want to be the light that gleams so bright that it blinds the one who dares to look in it's direction; I want to LIVE!

[twinklethelittlestar]

ur genuinely so cool

itty bitty sparkly bikini

[twinklethelittlestar]

as I was watching pictures of myself from only 2 years ago I was faced with deep feelings. who is that person staring back at me? she certainly cannot be me. but why does she look so familiar nevertheless? i felt her pain, her anguish, her sorrows, I wiped her shiny cheeks when life became too much to handle alone, and yet I find it difficult to recognize her.

having stared at the picture for some time I distinguished the girl who dreamt of so much, yet accomplished so little; and girl who hoped to someday see the world in colors, where then there were solely shades of gray; a girl full of ambitions that she could not pinpoint; a girl who did not know what life had in store for her.

I stand here, solemnly oathing to take care of that little girl and guide her through doors that she did not even dare to think could be opened. I vow to fulfill her dreams and always look for the stars even in the darkest of nights. I intend to make her proud and show her that the world is not so bad a place as long as you believe and have a little courage to try.

[twinklethelittlestar]

the word passion comes from the Latin "passio" which means to suffer. isn't it ironic, yet so reassuring at the same time? we can consequently conclude that in order to be able to voice a passion, you have to show that feeling through blood&sweat. spiral into obsession and give voice to your passion in order to give momentum to a fulfilled spiritual existence.

[twinklethelittlestar]

I found myself to be fluent in silence. is that so bad though? it is not the silence that refers to isolation or detachment from everything and everyone; it's the kind of silence that allows me to stay centered, to stay sane and to appreciate what the world has to offer, to find beauty in madness, to find bliss in the tedious and push the odious aside. it's the simplest of things that require silence; and I intend to experience them all. I want to consume so much poetry that the tears force themselves out of my lights, I want to read so much literature as though to make my eyes uncomfortable, I want to listen to so much music that my ears start to bleed from so much ecstasy, I want to watch lovers on the streets, holding hands, admiring them from afar whilst internally wondering if it would ever be my turn to experience something so pure that it must be heaven-sent. all these actions require tranquil and lack of speech. learn to appreciate without voicing your thoughts. sink it all in and feel the bliss come inside you, boiling your skin and soul. be present.