twofacedriddles

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Gotham rogues as Brooklyn 99 gifs

Victor Fries

Catwoman

Jonathan Crane

Edward Nygma

Harvey Dent

Harley Quinn

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wtf Bruce is this type of restraint bondage necessary?

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E-everything’s in two’s–

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Rogues as Customers bc you know, after 3 years in a coffee shop, I had to do em.

Harvey - The one who was clearly a debater in high school. He comes in and you greet him with the ‘Hi! How can I help you?’ only to be met with a ‘Hm’ of acknowledgment as he stares at the menu board. You wait. He stares. He ask what comes in the fraps. You tell him. He ask what comes in the lattes. You tell him. He debates between a latte and a frap, and when he decides, he debates between the sizes. Does he want almond milk? Soy milk? Is soy milk even good? Is the almond milk chocolate or vanilla? Is chocolate better? Finally, when it seems like he’s finally decided and you’re ready to punch it in, he just orders a black coffee instead.

Harley  - The one who buys for the team. She comes in and she has a list in her hand, and you know where this is headed right away. She’s incredibly polite through the entire process, and she tips great, but the 11 coffees and 7 sandwiches she buys for herself and ‘the boys’ makes you seriously wonder how many men she has employed under her, and given that she buys them all of this food, also makes you seriously wonder if she’s hiring at all.

Jonathan - The regular. You don’t know him personally but his vehicle is unmistakable. He always comes in at the same time, and he always orders the exact same order. It’s come to the point where when the staff sees him coming they actually pre-prepare his order to be ready when he comes into the store. It was only when the staff had the change prepared for him as well that he started to look a bit sheepish about the entire thing. If he ever changes his order the world might actually end.

Edward  - The precise one. He asks for a half hot chocolate half coffee and you make it. He takes one sip and says it isn’t what he ordered and you’re confused because you were sure it was half and half and then he says he wants more hot chocolate, so you add more but now the cup is 70% hot chocolate and 30% coffee and you’re pretty sure that isn’t half and half but he has a suit and he tipped $3 so you won’t argue. You won’t say anything either when he lines up the opening of his lid exactly with the logo on the cup, or when he requests only ‘3 slices of tomato, no more no less’ on his sandwich. After all, he tipped well.

Ivy - Coupon legend. Were there even coupons for this store? Apparently so, because when she comes in she has them on hand and on the counter within seconds. You can ALMOST admire the dedication and the fact that she’s saved over $10 on her order. When she tips anyways, you want to wipe a tear from your eye, because despite the fact she got nearly free everything she still delivered.

Freeze - The customer that sits for a while. Sometimes he’ll come in for a week straight, sometimes you won’t see him for 3 months. When he does show up, he always asks for a cup of ice and then sits in a booth for a while. You can’t help but feel a bit bad for the guy; he looks so forlorn alone in the booth by himself that it makes the shift feel a bit heavier.

Waylon - The last minute stop. He comes in ten minutes before close and orders the most random items. There’s no order or system to his requests; 2 bagels, but he also wants 10 packets of peanut butter, and he doesn’t want coffee but if you had a water or soda that’d be great. He’s a bit baffling, but he’s great for taking the leftovers home instead of leaving you to throw them out.

Joker - That one customer who’s been banned from all locations due to prior incidents. Seriously, all locations. He’s the equivalent to a ghost in the staff’s eyes because no one knows how one man can become such an inconvenience to have been banned everywhere.

Oswald- The customer you never see. He orders via mobile without fail and always sends the same driver to go pick the order up for him. You wonder if he just hates being seen in a coffee shop, or if he has so much on his plate that he can’t afford to head out and get it himself. If he were to one day show up himself you’d probably feel like you entered an alternate dimension or something. Someone call the Justice League, stat.

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Two-Face - Batman Forever (1995)

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Kate Kane as Batwoman in “DC Comics - Bombshells 008”

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I seriously wish that more wlw, even those who don’t read comics, were aware of Kate Kane (Batwoman). For a lot of reasons, including yes that it would be nice if she were popular enough to keep her own book, but also because of her origins.

Katherine “Kathy” Kane/Batwoman was created in 1956 as a love interest for Batman to combat allegations of homosexuality. After a couple of decades when I guess she was no longer useful they decided to rewrite canon so that Batwoman didn’t ever exist.

Fast forward to 2006. Kate Kane is reintroduced as Batwoman with a completely different backstory. Including that she is a lesbian. And had dated Renee Montoya (who, by the way, is a far better character in the comics than on “Gotham”. Far, far better, but maybe that’s just me. *cough* Gotham Central *cough*). And also Maggie Sawyer is a lesbian. And at present she and Kate are engaged.

TL; DR: Batwoman went from having been created solely for the purpose of NO HOMO to being a very out lesbian who was kicked out of the military while it was still under DADT because she refused to lie about it. That to me is important.

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this whole scene deserves to be played out in full

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IT REALLY HAPPENED

(BATMAN #49 2018)

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hmm. i love the riddler.

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