youre-walking-through-a-forest

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Repeating

The days keep repeating The nights not receding I now spend my time Drinking whisky and wine Hoping for a cure

Dust settles on my floor No longer opening the door To those who want a tour We are alone

Through screens we say “How was your day?” Knowing they won’t relay I guess we can pray?

Teens run amuck Hanging out the side of a truck “Why does this year suck?” Well a mask only costs a buck

I must admit I’m bed-locked After having my shit get rocked Limited only to a block I’ll stay inside and wait.

The same day repeats Barely on my feet I can no longer deny I kinda wanna die.

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Furious Love

I lay here and I ache

My heart bodyslamming against my ribs 

Right in the direction of who it wants

I’ve been here before

I’ve been here so many times before

And NEVER has she been right

My furious heart running full speed at those hurt me

Not that it knew, 

Fuck did it ever not know

And I was always the one to take the blows

She runs wild while my body takes the consequences

But God I hope you’re heart is doing the same

That a fiery pain emanates out of your chest when you think of me

Dreaming of our hands clasped, eyes locked

And gushing over the love we hid for so long

You know I’ve been thinking of our first dance?

Something dramatic, choreographed, but endlessly fun

Much like our relationship i suppose

I’m tired

I’m tired of taking blows for those who should be receiving them

I love you and I just want you to want me

Please dear god I want you to hold me

envelop me in your arms and tell me you wont leave

That I’m the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen

Because you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen

And I’m sick of pretending you arent

Friends opinions be damned I love you and you love me

Please just 

please

love me

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Tense Sunshine

Light streams through these tall windows

Mesh curtains tinting the shine green

Leaves on the maple waving at me

As if beckoning to lay beneath them and breath in all their hard work

The air inside lays sticky and still

Keeping me stuck to this family heirloom

The people here laying low and quiet in lieu of prolonged isolation

But the sun does want

She calls all our names and begs to tint our skin with her love

She travels thousands of miles across our skies

And sleeps to give us refuge

All to feed the creatures she loves so much

But we were selfish

Selfish and greedy to think her love was owed to us

Now we must wait in our glorified caves

Waiting for the fruits of our neglect to pass

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

My Bed

I know you made it nice for me

Brought me pillows and asked which I wanted

You probably swept the floors and dusted the dressers

But I simply cannot sleep

I’m sitting in the living room

Right now

Thinking about how I won’t sleep

The movies and images that plague me won’t be stopped

My fears and worries won’t rest

Demons and Devils in the form of memories

Will keep me from that which I crave so much

I will weep

I will sigh

I will roll over and wish to die

But I will not sleep

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Wallpaper

A small chandelier hangs above this table

It’s amber light illuminating the scene before me

A plant sits on top of a puke-green tablecloth

Fine China gathering dust inside old wooden cabinets

Relics, trapped in time by those who can’t go back

The wall paper is peeling off the walls

The wallpaper is peeling off my consciousness

Put up so long ago, it no longer sticks

You try to roll that shit right back on

But it crumbles in your hands

You’ve lived here too long

The decor is simply out of date

Let me decorate the inside of my mind

For it is mine to populate with what I wish

And I don’t need to feel bad

For loving my own home

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Daylight Savings

It’s Sunday

The sun opens its crusted eyes

And gazes upon this cold city

Months of neglect has wasted the minds of its citizens

But she’s here now

Let her love fill those tired bones of yours

Smile :)

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Hey There!

Sorry, this isn’t a new piece... I just wanted to say hello to all my new followers! I honest to god never thought people would find this blog, and truthfully i kinda stopped and wasn’t planning on doing more. But I’m trying to do more creative things since i’ve been down in the dumps lately, and I was very surprised to see all the reblogs and messages when i logged back in today! so I’ll definitely be making some new pieces for you very soon :) I also recently made an instagram for all my creative stuff, so feel free to follow @meggilycammily to get more frequent updates

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

stunted roots

An orchid sits on a windowsill

quietly it stares out over its domain

a small room, cluttered with pizza boxes and month-old laundry

the blank glare of the tv gives the room a blue glow

just enough to highlight it’s nest-like state

but she doesn’t care

she hasn’t cared for months, probably years

dormancy hasn’t been kind to her

petals long fallen and shrivelled up

decomposed into the soil that bred her

she looks like nothing more than a bundle of sticks a child loosely stuck in the ground

a land marker of many on some son’s journey

the only indicator of her species being a rotted label at her base

roots overtaking it like a dying witches fingers

long, spindly, and desperate

you see, the pot is too small

her once strong roots now wither 

clinging on to whatever is left in her old, piddly home

even those things she shouldn’t.

no amount of water can help her forget 

that she’s going to die if she stays

new pots present themselves

but each presents different growing challenges

and all just seem, 

uncomfortable

maybe if she just stays

locks onto one more morsel of dirt

her flowers will bloom again

relive her early growing days

but in the end

she simply does not care anymore

her stems could sit and rot in the sun all day

and feel she chose right

shes surrounded by the other plants

so why leave?

she just wants to sit

drink

and wait to die in her old, old soil

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Standstill

The world doesn’t care

It goes on endlessly, spinning-top Inception style

The leaves change colours

The Sun rises

The Sun sets

People fuck

People break up

And the cycle never ends

The best way to describe time is 

Monotonous

The same things happening over and over

Maybe a small improvement there, big disaster there

But overall, it’s a computer running a code for a large-scale game of Sims

And I am simply a line of code created by an intergalactic coder

I wish I could ask them things

Why am I so behind

Why am i doomed to be alone

Why am I here

Alas, I am doomed to watching my cigarette burn out

And squish the butt into the unfeeling earth

Purpose is just a concept humans made in our minds

To make us feel better about the suffering of life

I think I’d like to cut the power please.

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

Love at First Light

Did I die when I first saw you?

Did my mind collapse into a puddle of goop when you waved?

Did our souls interconnect like snakes in heat when you hugged me?

Did my entire life become focused on that first “hello”?

The short answer i suppose is...

No

But as sun crept its way across the blue, blue sky

it sure began to feel that way

It was when I sat across from you, expensive coffee in hand

Did i start to notice how wide your smile was

How your teeth glinted with mischievous intentions 

How your face shone in its fluorescent light

How your laugh was like the tinkle of sleigh bells

Our nervous banter slipping off our silken tongues

Only halted by small bouts of extended eye contact

It was far too easy to get sucked into your sunlight

Too easy to forget previous restrictments

And run away into some faraway place

Where i could analyze the incredible curves of your face

All

Alone

Instead we ran away through the valleys to your home

Where I caught my first glimpse at a future not yet written

I got to feel the air between us tense in anticipation

Molecules physically grabbing us by the collars

And dragging us closer

Close up I saw the dual colours in your eyes

Like a drop of sweet syrup in the Atlantic

Lord how I wish I could tell you what I saw

The perfect curve of your body as you lay beside me

The electric touch of your hands on my neck 

I could almost feel roots growing into your skin

Locked in, and not easily ripped out

But how could I not?

The way we’d laugh in the middle of making love

And profess our enjoyment of this moment

The way our bodies fit like nothing I’d ever experienced

The feeling of coming home to bed after a long trip

Or when you finally find the right key for a frustrating lock

Or when everything fits perfectly in your backpack

It just felt, right

And even after we ravaged each other, your voice was gentle

Discussing life problems, solutions

I swear we could have solved all the worlds issues in that bedroom

if only we had more time

And care

And emotional availability

But Alas, we are different planets

Separated by lightyears of distance, personal issues, life plans

It would take sci-fi levels of fuckery for it to work

And besides, I’m not sure you feel the same

I’m now sitting here, phone in hand waiting,

Waiting on some magic message that will either suck me in further

Or finally turn me away from this impossible dream

But I doubt this is something I’ll have figured out for me

I’m the idiot who decided to fall in love with a man just like me

I knew I should have hated myself more

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

A visit before you leave

I hope you’ll visit me if you leave

Wake me up in the middle of the night

Hold my hand, tell me you love me

I’ll be spooked, maybe ask why you’re there

But you’ll stay mysterious

Telling me to be good

And to think about him sometimes

You’ll get up and walk to the door

Blow me one final kiss and take your place upstairs

Where i know you’ll go with the other bright ones

I’ll be left to wonder

Was it really you, or was it my imagination

Your ghost come to see me one last time

Or hopeful dreaming

Either way

I hope you’ll care enough to say goodbye

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

My Deer

My Deer my Deer

You’ve been hit again

That bullet of mortality gone straight to your soul

Shot by the gun of the unfeeling universe

Set on the destruction of of you

My Deer my Deer

Your future so uncertain

As I look into your eyes

I fear this might really be the end

My Deer my Deer

I can only do so much to help you

As I already maimed your innocent heart

And have yet to forgive myself

My Deer my Deer

Please let me hold your hoof

And bury my face into your warm stomach

So that I may pour myself into you

My Deer my Deer

I can see your antlers begin to crack and crumble

Your fur falling out in my hands

And your muscles disintegrate

My Deer my Deer

You aren’t meant to be here

You should be running through the woods

Happy and healthy as you graze your days away

My Deer my Deer

Please don’t let Mother Nature take her course

Fight back and survive this wound

So that we may one day run together again

[youre-walking-through-a-forest]

I don’t want to think about you tonight

I don’t want to think about you crying

I don’t want to think about you sobbing my name

and cursing it for the wrongs ive caused you

even if that isnt what youre doing

its what i feel youre doing

i wish the circumstances could have been better

that we hadnt gotten so attached

that it was just another relationship

but sadly it wasnt

and i hurt you real bad