theanonfirefly

[theanonfirefly]

This may be subjective, but our parents and the relationship they share with each other, are the biggest determiners of how we lead our own lives.

From how we deal with our emotions and manage our relationships to how we carry ourselves in public and work at our job, they determine it to a great extent.

For those of you who had it good and are happy about it, lucky you!

For those of you who had it not-so-good- I would like to shift your perspective, only if you allow me to try and do so. In every living moment, you get a chance to change the narrative, to change what you beleive in, to change how you live, react and respond to things and people. A chance to recreate your own life, with lessons you learn from others.

A CHANCE for you to be the real YOU. ❤️

And a CHANCE for me to be the real ME, because just like you, i am worth this chance too. ❤️

[theanonfirefly]

[theanonfirefly]

Reasons to recover-

To enjoy the littlest things in life that are so meaningful but mostly overlooked.

[theanonfirefly]

It's like Tumblr is my personal diary, I share with it what I don't share with anyone else.

[theanonfirefly]

I always used to think that in the New Year, you should have a clean slate.

But now that I reflect over this thought, it doesn't have to be like that, you don't need to have a clean slate because if you do, you loose all your progress. In fact, in the new year, we can learn from the past and revise our slates whenever needed.

That's the joy of having a slate filled with experiences and memories!

Happy New Year 2025, whenever it arrives!

[theanonfirefly]

It's okay if you've made a mistake. You're still worthy of receiving love. 💜

[theanonfirefly]

Being a desi, a guy's religion and religiousness is more important for the family of the girl than how the guy himself is.

For the first time in my life, as 'the' girl, having seen how my own religious family functions, I would beg to differ.

How you treat people and how you lead your life is a real prayer to god.

But then again, to each its own.

[theanonfirefly]

I never saw it this way.

Despite being low on self confidence and self esteem I still do things that make me afraid, I still get out of my comfort zone and I may be shaking like a leaf with anxiety but I still show up.

Let me take this as a win and pat my back because no ones gonna do it for me. 🧿💟

[theanonfirefly]

Learnt this quite late in life, but, I don't need to seek validation from everyone and i dont need every person on Earth to like me.

I know my worth, I know who I am and what I bring to the table.

I only seek to be accepted by a few close ones, that is it.

[theanonfirefly]

Judging someone for doing something and then doing it myself, making my own judgement bite me.

Such a nice way to live.

[theanonfirefly]

Man, i am jealous of people who are better communicators than me in social settings. I dont mean to shut off conversations with 'ohh', 'okay' and 'uhm', it just happens.....

[theanonfirefly]

Sometimes I just feel like I dont fit in anywhere.

Is it me? Is it others? I just can't seem to know.

I feel like such an outsider, an imposter.

Sometimes I feel so inferior to others, like I am feeling right now. Other times I feel somewhat superior, morally.

But at the end of the day, I feel like this polarity I experience doesn't matter.

I feel so judgemental of others the entire day, that at the end of the day, I become my hardest critique.

[theanonfirefly]

REPEAT AFTER ME:

"I am a wholesome human being and I deserve to be spoken and treated with respect."

NOW, BELIEVE IT.

[theanonfirefly]

I'M ANGRY.

Unlearning years of conditioning when it comes to communication skills, relationship repair skills, views on sex and purity culture, emotional regulation or rather lack of it. It's no damn joke.

So, yes, I'm angry, so angry that I have hot tears streaming down my face and my heart aches for how things could have been different.

BUT, IM THANKFUL.

I get to do the work, I get to relearn behaviors and handle my emotions effectively, I get to build better relationships than those I've had in the past.

So, although my heart breaks, from those cracks and crevices colorful flowers bloom and slowly fill in the gaps. One day, i believe my heart will be whole again adorned by love and joy.

[theanonfirefly]

I have begun to realise recently, at 27, that Purity Culture has not done much good, it has only made me unaware, insecure, anxious, judgemental of myself and others, fearful of giving or receiving any romantic gestures to or from my SO, afraid of people sexualising me for wearing dresses or shorts and the inability to explore my sexuality freely without the fear of having the Sword of Damocles hanging over my head!!

Do you relate?

[theanonfirefly]

Reasons to recover:

To be able to lead a more fulfilling and joyful life with that one person.

[theanonfirefly]

The moment I realised that the things I wanted from love were those that I had to give in return, I realised, I needed to step up.