anthonybialy

[anthonybialy]

Career Status of the Buffalo Bills and Sabres

Wasting careers is a Buffalo tradition.  I hopefully only mean sports.  It’s always worth asking if you’re doing something over time just because those who were born before you set precedent by doing dumb things.  Performance results are unfulfilling for participants aside from being paid above the per capita rate to play a sport.  And that money’s tainted like it’s from a bank robbery.

Sports reflect our lives.  Sometimes, they do so a bit too perfectly.  A supposed distraction instead illustrates how nothing ever goes right.  

Different levels of frustration end up the same.  That’s not very reassuring.  The thrill of a couple playoff games is how to tell them apart.  I don’t know if we should be more disappointed with the better team.  The Bills are closer in the same sense Russell Salvatore offers a better dinner than Domino’s.  The difference is steak is ultimately satisfying in a way Buffalo’s football menu option failing to represent the conference isn’t.

A few guys who could catch would help.  Brandon Beane should be trying to assemble an Avengers-level wide receiver crew.  Daring foes to attempt to outscore them would be like like issuing cage face masks to receivers in the 1970s in order to block for some running back who was with Buffalo.  Instead, that quarterback of theirs gets another chance to prove he’s the MVP by doing it on his own.

The Bills are rather nonchalant considering they will never possess this opportunity again.  They were terrific at drafting one particular quarterback and have been middling since.  Getting lucky might be the exception.  Management should examine the brutal drought that led to them getting hired and learn to be appreciative.  Instead, the prodigal son seems eager to party in a foreign country again.

Josh Allen has been let down on a higher level than his Sabre counterpart.  The youngster isn’t young anymore.  Rasmus Dahlin has played more than 500 NHL games.  He’s been saved from wear and tear by not participating in the playoffs.  Who wants to exert another 28 times?  Someone who turned 25 this offseason is both young and grizzled.  Being affiliated with the Sabres will age the most whimsical youngster a decade every year.

Fans would be more upset if Dahlin weren’t.  An athlete ideally embodies characteristics fans wish to emulate.  In the sad case of the Sabres, the best case is a star also expressing frustration at an owner who responds to declining appraisals by dumping more trash on his lawn.

Whispers about Dahlin wanting major renovations were meant with shouts about the source’s utter lack of credibility.  Either way, the captain should be bothered enough by once again extending the league record for missing the playoffs that he’s thinking about leaving.  Feeling uncomfortable with the situation would be the natural reaction.

Dahlin’s captaincy is going like that of the Titanic’s.  You know things are bad when you ponder his role.  Exasperated fans wondering who to blame ask whether he’s an inept leader or much of the roster is incapable of being led.  Eric Moulds would be a Hall of Famer if the Colts had drafted him so he could field passes from an all-time quarterback instead of the dregs the Bills burdened him with.

The company is unsuccessful, notes the unproductive employee.  Determining how much each player contributes to either thriving or failing is a fascinating look at cause and effect.  It’s not as much fun while tense during seasons.  Hard workers often find themselves stuck with disagreeable buffoons who’ve realized they get paid the same no matter what.  Terry Pegula enjoys paying workers fortunes they don’t deserve, which is why he couldn’t afford his own stadium.

This team harmed those who adore it so much that they’ll be grateful for their persecutor.  Hoping modest success after the playoffs were out of reach will carry over 

gladly beg to add a stadium for a skinflint multibillionaire to their tax burden instead of paying for it by buying tickets.  A certain percentage of stubborn fans are somehow confused why the price of attendance is out of reach.

Acting like both teams would have fled if this particular tycoon hadn’t stepped in and bought them is an attempt to engineer gratitude despite underachieving.  Battered supporters can still expect the hockey side to make the playoffs once per generation even if we appreciate that they’re not the Houston Sabres.

Forgetting whole eras is the result of feeling disengaged.  Buffalo hockey fans technically watch yet don’t pay attention.  The local team’s broadcasts have become like putting on The Office in the background while scrolling.  The exile feels like a vague blur of agony as a result.  It’s surprising to remember that, say, David Legwand was a Sabre.  Losing interest in hockey generally is a specific symptom.

The franchise can’t claim they’re cursed while their own decisions prompt shortcomings.  There’s not a gambling scandal or goat they can blame like Chicago’s baseball teams each did for around a century.  By contrast, Buffalo’s clubs have a litany of lousy trades like the Red Sox dealing away the best player ever.

Fans suffer because life consists of it.  Small joys are supposed to offer mild balance to the brutal reality.  But we can’t even escape for a few hours thanks to an owner of teams and not his own failures. 

Binary results leave out subtleties.  Teams either ride on a firetruck while carrying a trophy or don’t.  Some can get reasonably close.  A shot on the green that’s in the flag’s shadow differs entirely from one that finds its way into the hole.  The Bills need to putt soon.  The Sabres drive the ball toward the parking lot, which is shocking considering their experience.

[anthonybialy]

Lunch Is on You

Discovering what’s free is shouldn’t take too much of the school day.  The concept of exchange is easy enough that any average student could grasp it.  That leaves out Kathy Hochul, the remedial governor who’s boasting about her latest scheme to make kids dependent.  Buying Pop-Tarts and peanut butter is too much to ask of people raising smaller versions of themselves.

Free school breakfast and lunch for children is barely a consolation prize.  Cursed mini-residents are doomed to limited futures by virtue of their parents living in New York.  Claiming to set up kids for success by handing out complimentary meals in educational facilities would be funny were it not sad.  The state they’re in doesn’t allow thriving.  Location is only part of it.  Albany needs elementary school attendees to grow up and obtain fortunes to be pilfered.

Contrary to a daftly dim governor’s claims, responding to the destitution she inflicted is not an achievement.  Success is when parents are able to buy food for their kids.  The political executive who taxes the jurisdiction until it’s unsuccessful will never get it.

Whose kids are these?  The state taking over parenting responsibility is shameless in its politburo-style approach.  Identifying under which delusion they operate helps us understand the incomprehensible.  Adult trade ripoff artists think items either genuinely become free when government pays or are cool with just charging someone else.  Differentiating between brute selfishness and calculated performative faux selflessness lets us know what kind of scammer is trying to ironically keep the next generation from dining.

Expecting those with more to contribute involuntarily is the easiest way to inspire underachievement.  Democrats always classify high income as having more and not making more.  Creating worth is foreign to parasites who wait for the host to deliver nutrients.

You’re not pro-hungry children, are you?  Switching back to a system where guardians give kids money for school lunches will be framed as taking food out of whippersnappers’ yappers.

Getting victims hooked is the goal.  Government is a drug dealer preying upon children.  Liberals just want to install interventions in the hope they’ll become permanent.  Sanctimonious outrage is the only thing they create.  It’s profitable in its way.

Showcase liberals make a production out of claiming they’re glad to be taxed if it means feeding kids.  They’re the same viewers outraged that they have to fund the PBS shows only they watch.  Professional preeners never release their tax returns to show just how much they contribute.  They will will do so about the same time they give without coercion.

The true dream should be for parents to be able to prosper to the point where they can comfortably cover a daily Lunchables for every household minor.  Making enough to cover sloppy Joes is not going to happen in the erstwhile Empire State.  New York’s politicians apologize for ruining the future by ladling swill on the trays of young scholars in the present.

Banning advancement is the worst when it’s framed as helping.  Patronize the ravenous by telling them they’ll starve without state help.  Both kids and parents feel discouraged.  New York is rebooting Harrison Bergeron as a documentary.  There’s no way that story’s getting assigned in any public school.

Buying votes has historically been subtler.  But Democrats want to be open about the kind of operation they’re running.  Banning separate checks is their version of an investment in the future.  There’s nothing more important than conditioning subjects to feel like they’ll never get ahead.

The stirring governor thinks it’s impossible to buy one’s own energy.  Hochul created an environment that’s as upbeat as expected.  It’s important to start teaching early.

School’s real lessons come outside of the classroom.  The cafeteria is a perfect place for a practical example.  Youthful diners might encounter the horrifying reality that things cost currency.  Wholesale handout lunches indoctrinate children to feel they’re as useless as adult Democrats.  Imparting negative values is as bad as not helping them learn empathy.

The North Korean mob wouldn’t be so brazen.  A public relations effort to claim they’re benevolently addressing hungry mouths is part of the effort to thieve in plain sight.  The scammers responsible for spreading poverty in the first place can’t maintain power unless public sentiment is warped to make the cause appear to be the solution.

Our leaders are enigmas.  We struggle to discern whether Queen Kathy is dumb enough to believe calories can be delivered without prices or is cynically recruiting a future generation of famished zombies who count on her to deliver fresh brains.  Generous interpreters may conclude it’s the former, as her evident inability to plan more than five minutes ahead shines through at every opportunity.

The person who reeks of napalm knows just how to extinguish flames.  You can call me excessively optimistic, but it seems easier to not cause crises in the first place.  It would be far easier for parents to buy food if, say, they weren’t taxed into oblivion.  The only thing treated as a crime in New York is earning.

Political pirates will just plunder from rich jerks, so broke people are totally safe.  Legal stealing will continue in perpetuity.  It’s not like they can flee to Florida.  The definition of wealthy is anyone making more than you.  Selfish fiends who hoard cash for no good reason aside from getting paid to work could buy things and employ others, which sure would seem to alleviate financial crises.  But helping each other voluntarily sets a bad precedent for Democrats.

CEOs concerned about the plight of malnourished students might even be charitably inclined.  Just like funding is naturally attracted to worthwhile projects, decent humans figure out how to dispense assistance.

I know just the person who could help.  Someone who’s rich like Kathy despite being useless is allowed to donate.  But that’s the one free thing her faction never believe in, namely that which involves will.  It’s a much better election strategy to convince the populace they’re doomed.

Scaring youths about not having enough to nosh on until dinner motivates them properly.  Don’t worry: your government bought your brats breakfast.  Naturally, they didn’t use their own money.  Expecting someone else to cover the cost is as childish as it gets.

[anthonybialy]

Gina Carano Wins Fight Against Mouse

There’s finally a worthwhile courageous Star Wars story.  Gina Carano getting Disney to admit they’re sorry for letting social justice lunatics commandeer their ship has brought balance to the universe.  The corporate overlord that generates childhood dreams has aim so bad that they could be Stormtroopers, so at least they understand some characters.  

The difference between the real world and a space adventure is that the latter can be scripted to make sense.  That leaves out the prequels.  Short of not firing someone for voting differently in the first place, the next-best scenario involves apologizing to her for committing the alleged mortal sin of transphobia.

Things have gotten slightly less ridiculous.  Call it progress.  The most absurd possibility regularly became actuality not long ago.  Waiting to see if a space Western purveyor would really decide who would no longer be on their show based on grasping biology embodied the era of lunacy.  You’re born your gender just like being a Jedi.  Reasonable people kept hoping that they were not going to really fire her.  But then a rather preposterous kowtowing to modern struggle session holders actually happened.  A ridiculous suggestion that turned to reality was a victory for the Dark Side.

Daring to say truthful things is a heck of a reason for losing an acting gig.  Gina compared demonizing people for political views to the behavior of Nazis, which seems extreme until her enemies tried their hardest to prove her correct.  She also mocked masks, which are as scientific as World War II-style dogfights in space.  And ridiculing the idea of choosing pronouns shows respect for chromosomes and English.

A space fantasy has its limits.  Participants can’t change genders even as they zip around space with Doctor Who fighting Klingons.  Some things are easy to make up.  Chewbacca only sounds like a feminine name because of the ending vowel.  But rules are different away from gravitational pull.  Remember that this was a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

Viewers don’t have to agree with what people portraying characters they find interesting believe in their personal time.  Acting like a different person grants no special ability to hold fascinating political views.  They may be granted by the Force, but we like to pretend that’s pretend.  It’s possible to work with or enjoy the work of someone who believes things with which you disagree.  I’m sorry to be such a radical, but crazy ideas made winning the Battle of Yavin feasible.

Liberals who think there can be no dissent try to preserve order in the galaxy by crushing rebellion.  The good news is they’re just like one side in their beloved franchise.  Everyone opposed is a monstrous Jawa-puncher.  You’re worse than Palpatine for thinking PBS can fundraise on its own from viewers.  Sending money to your station is just like buying a subscription for the right to tune into a serial about a dude you’re not supposed to call Boba Fett hanging out with a little guy you’re not supposed to call Yoda.  Paying for originality is the next barrier to overcome.

Revenge is a lousy motivator for casting decisions.  Hasn’t anyone been paying attention to this Luke fellow?  Like how I hope Mark Hamill keeps the job he lucked into having despite his Sith-like political nastiness, I didn’t want Pedro Pascal fired for being just as melodramatic as Cara Dune.

The only reason to can the man playing the masked babysitter would have been to maintain precedent.  And that incorrectly presumes the earlier decision was correct.  A similarly terrible decision shouldn’t be made in consistency’s name, which is why doing the same under different conditions can be overrated as a quality.  The only real reason to banish Pascal to Hoth would possibly be for his habit of getting handsy.  It’s uncanny that his anxiety flares up only when he’s around ladies.

Centralized authority always tries to crush individuals.  Isn’t anyone heeding lessons from this franchise?  Infringing on a cast member’s anodyne opinions is a regrettable example of not living up to standards.  One side is excellent at falling short.  Kevin Smith’s one half-worthwhile movie remains tainted by risbly claiming those who blew up the Death Star were left-wingers.  I had a bad feeling about it.  The Empire’s advocates claim they’re resisting authority as they demand conformity.  The power to fire someone for daring to dissent is accompanied by wanting only the government to have superlasers.

I can finally get back to not growing up.  My interest in Star Wars plummeted as I technically aged after they fired someone for being on Honecker’s right.  Potentially welcoming back a character who stood up to Mickey’s empire offers the chance pretending stories about celestial pirates evading authorities are mature.  I can finally wear a Star Wars shirt again like an adult.  The hero in question has announced she’s fine with subscribing to Disney+ and having a toy Grogu if anyone has reservations about acting like a kid well past voting age.

Even watching the cursed season could be worth the laughs while checking up on the plot.  I might finally check out the Mandalorian season even though it’s apparently atrocious.  Lizzo in space is no sign of advancement even if light speed is obtainable.  And Jack Black appearing in the Star Wars universe tips the balance toward the alternate dimension with the USS Enterprise.

Conditions are getting back to normal as Ewoks celebrate.  Blowing up the intimidation machine lets people live without fear.  The sphere with mouse ears won’t be used to fire someone for political takes that aren’t even shocking and are shared by a high percentage of potential viewers.  A country where governors can’t prevent citizens from getting haircuts for as long as there’s a virus about thankfully feels as distant as A New Hope.

A show about an individual standing up for himself and what that person thinks is right should have inspired the company that made it.  Gina’s tale of persevering through injustice would be a good basis for a Star Wars story.  I know just who to cast.   The true story is more compelling even if it’s set here on boring Earth.  The lessons are universal even if some companies take a few episodes to learn them.

[anthonybialy]

Buffalo Teams Trail City

Wondering if Buffalo is where athletes want to play naturally leads to insecurity.  Loyal residents should know it’s the second part of the team name that’s at issue.  The city itself only frightens off potential athletic employees who fear big-town charm and blizzard parties, which is a relief to those who are defensive about how outsiders perceive their beloved home.  But those capable of noticing results may still rightfully be unimpressed with the city’s teams.  As for improving outside of sports, it’s way past time to make sure mayoral elections stop coming down to hoping voters make the least worst choice available.  

The delights of urban living with suburban conditions are contrasted against the agonies inflicted by the location’s athletic competitors.  Teams that constantly let down their devotees hopefully aren’t a reflection of where they’re based.  There are better ways to show devotion than continually maintaining commitment to clubs that never prevail.

Would anyone like to play for the Sabres?  Trying to ask without laughing is a tougher challenge than making the playoffs.  The universe’s worst franchise somehow finds new ways to frustrate.  Yet another underwhelming offseason shows consistency’s downside.

Free agency for the Sabres is a superhero movie: you know it’s going to underwhelm yet still feel disappointed after the release.  The lack of character development is a given.  Nobody has interesting powers unless getting paid despite never making the playoffs counts.

The hockey department still hasn’t recovered from a MySpace-era miscalculation.  July 1, 2007 remains the worst day in Buffalo sports history.  Bringing up losing both co-captains in lieu of remaining a contender is only to document the source of endless suffering.  A child born that day can vote.

Cheer up, as it’s only getting worse.  There’s approximately zero hope of improving up to achieve the rather modest goal of being in the half of teams that advance.  The worst part of semipermanent awfulness is how there’s no way to envision a happy outcome.

Would you like to set up shop near where Cavages was?  Recruiting free agents to play for the Sabres is like trying to add mall tenants.  The difference is shoppers might return to preferring outlets gathered under one roof.

Reality television has rarely been this authentic in horror.  The Sabres are a restaurant in a Gordon Ramsay show.  The owner should feel horrified if the renowned British scolder suddenly strolls in.  The shocking indifference might make this the one challenge where the cranky host is unable to fix the behavior of the stubborn failure in charge.  Employees who are either unqualified or underutilized aren’t going to change the perception, much less results.

The Sabres avoid losing the tournament by never making it.  They unwittingly display Mister Miyagi-style fault with the teacher, not the student.  Karate recruits wouldn’t want to be tainted by joining the wrong dojo.  It’s not so much learning karate for diabolical reasons of confrontation but worrying about a clumsy style that leads to devotees hitting the mat face-first after kicking air.

The Bills would seem to be appealing for a footballer looking to relocate.  That’s unless they’re wasting the career of the best player they’ve ever had by not actively recruiting the most impressive talent.  Brandon Beane thinks Josh Allen is so amazing that he doesn’t need significant help.  He dares you to maintain the same faith.

You’d think those wading in the talent pool might want to be attached to a trendy brand.  But an all-galaxy quarterback who only takes time from hanging out with his pop star wife to act in commercials is the MVP precisely because he has to do so much on his own.  I bet even a singular competitor would like some help.

Check LinkedIn to see if the Bills are even hiring in the first place.  The unwillingness to add help at the one position that will help the greatest asset they’ve ever had reflects a determined adherence to stubborn foolishness even for a historically daft franchise.  Any wide receiver looking for a gig should contact the corporation before month’s end.

Pessimism offers good training.  The reflex to not get hopes up is a gift to those who fear we’re being teased by the Bills.  We’re only reviewing the case against the Sabres for the sake of remembering just how deplorably they’ve treated their fans.  

Being certain Beane knows what he’s doing is not as self-evident as he hopes.  It’s on him to prove he’s not a one-hit wonder.  His interviews are not nearly as entertaining as Nena.  Defenders protest with names like Matt Milano while missing the overall picture of an underwhelming supporting cast.

There might be other things to life than sports.  The sacrilegious claim nonetheless reminds us what else there is to enjoy in the same area as athletic venues.  Buffalo should be a desirable place to set up shop regardless of if teams are prevailing.  Still, it would be a nice bonus to have traffic diverted by celebratory parades where a trophy is the grand marshal.  The streets are still nice otherwise.

[anthonybialy]

Parked Southward

It’s my fault for still watching South Park.  I remembering it being the best thing, which also means I need to buy ibuprofen.  A show that’s been on this long is made by even more elderly geezers who forgot why enthusiasts liked it in the first place.  Recent episodes aren’t making anyone ‘member.  I’m not offended: I’m disappointed.

Marking off Wednesday at 10 p.m. is a habit I picked up in college.  Blocking off half an hour for South Park turned out to be unhealthier than lager.  It’s not to age myself; the year I was born did that.

Teasing everyone is South Park’s brand.  It’s just that they happen to focus on a certain half recently.  The forgetful creators of a show about vulgar kids made out of construction paper either willing to needle themselves or forgot what they used to believe.  They apparently find it cool to mock abortion foes, which I regret to point out once included them.  The cartoonish current events review is likewise sticking it to foes of illegal immigration, which includes, um, South Park like when they got a whole episode out of it.  Viewers are left wondering whether it’s wholesale mockery or just a specific side.

Getting praised is nice, which is why those receiving fawning rarely check specifics.  But it’s worth noticing who’s providing pleased feedback and more importantly what kind.  Their new fans are applauding rabidly that someone is finally standing up to a president who’s quite obviously never faced any criticism.  Who said Trump did anything bad before South Park had the guts?  It’s easier to get liberals to cheer than everyone to laugh.

Making fun of the incumbent only seems like it’s standing up to authority.  I’m a Constitution enthusiast whose favorite Rush song is Anthem, and I have zero interest in praising Donald Trump.  Also, it’s beyond tiresome to point out he’s a loudmouthed buffoon.  The easiest person to insult should inspire writers to branch out.

Tuning into Comedy Central for political commentary has been normal for too long.  The erstwhile equivalent of The Five’s token liberal can’t even be bothered anymore.  South Park used to balance out The Daily Show.  It now offers a preview.  I don’t remember anything that’s ever been on at 10:30.

You could be lectured while streaming.  Not getting cable altogether grows increasingly appealing.  One of the few reasons to stay enrolled thinks you should quit.  South Park already savaged providers of their program for despising customers, so it may be time to switch to streaming.  That could include dropping the Cartman channel.  South Park’s problem there is that there are countless options that weren’t created during Bill Clinton’s presidency.  A show created when televisions were furniture is fittingly phoning it in.

It’s easy to say a show isn’t funny when it’s not catering to your beliefs.  But I’m a South Park hipster who thinks it’s been on the decline for a decade or so.  The lack of focused vitriol became apparent around the time they apologized to Ben freaking Affleck.  They almost made me forget about tacos.

Deriding this particular president is oddly conventional wisdom.  We inhabit twisted times in case nobody has noticed.  Howard Stern syndrome infects those who became what they used to lampoon.  Appeasing the humorless is hilarious.

Iconoclasts have gotten comfy.  College smart alecks became the sort of fixtures they used to rail against.  A South Park episode satirizing the creators of South Park would seem refreshing, but people who still have pronouns in their bio might not appreciate the depth.

You don’t have to praise the Republican to rebel.  But these are the same guys who called George W. Bush a great man in Los Angeles in 2007.  Defending his outlook in Team America was the most compelling defense of the nation in question’s global role.  And I’m still fearful of panthers.

The show’s willing to stand up to unwise conventional wisdom was not just to provoke but because they believed many widespread narratives were crafted by idiots.  My first suspicion that this cartoon might not only be uproarious but vaguely conservative was when they burned down environmental lunacy in Rainforest Schmainforest.  I might even go on a choir tour to praise their defense of civilization over pretty flowers.

They still teased everyone and especially those with whom they agreed.  Now, they’re trying hard to impress their new friends.  This lame clique isn’t even cool, anyway.  It didn’t seem like being vaguely libertarian took effort.  Now, targeting feels forced as the animation gets smoother.

Success doesn’t chance those who are wisenheimers all along.  But you can forget to be irreverent if paying rent doesn’t rely on delivering it well.  Trey Parker and Matt Stone got impossibly rich to the point where they don’t have to do what anyone wants.  Cartman’s $10 million is tip money.  But they reached this point precisely by satirizing whatever they pleased.  Now, they suck up to those who didn’t get them there.  It’s as absurd as a talking towel.

Zealous fans are hoping for an occasional flash of brilliance that drew them in last century.  Those who saw Al Gore blame ManBearPig for havoc he wreaked on the premiere night hope they’ll again gleefully challenge sacred doctrine.  Instead, they’ve switched to agreeing that his delusions are real.  Seeing what they’ll say draws in outrage viewers, which is good news if they’re more valuable than people who enjoy it.

Popularity doesn’t equal quality.  Sometimes, neither works out.  Repeat value is at zero.  I find myself watching new episodes exactly once.  I can tune into, say, Proper Condom Use with the sound off and recite dialogue.  It’s a sign of the program’s status that I check the episode description before putting on an episode to have playing mindlessly in the background.  The novelty of not having scripts memorized is only so appealing.

The gang should be proud of how hard it is to make an amazing television show for a decade.  The problem is they’ve now been on for about three decades.  As with so much else, The Simpsons already did it.  

Did you know Trump is gross?  The portrayal is commonly accepted amongst sophisticated political analysts.  That includes the purveyors of appalling depictions responsible for what I once called my favorite show.  I’d have to identify what seasons I mean even if I still think of it as such.  Letting an executive clown get you ticked enough to entice indulging in easy material is his joke on them.

[anthonybialy]

Social Security Box Unlocked

We’re all set to follow through until doom arrives.  There are no fears that the most awful annuity possible for individuals and the nation will be touched, so don’t worry.  The future is defined, which certainly doesn’t mean it’s promising.

The inability to distinguish between parties is as confusing as the utter lack of return on an involuntary investment.  Dismantling the colossal ripoff that is Social Security has something in common with meager payouts, namely lack of interest.

You can tell Donald Trump’s diehards are closeted liberals because they presume ending Social Security means condemning senior citizens to foraging in the Subway dumpster.  But retaining the worst sort of income redistribution is making geezers as poor as the nation.

Trimming around the edges beats around the bush.  It was mildly fun watching that Twitter guy make nonworking workers justify their pay for the first time ever.  The term “useless federal employee” implies that some are helpful.  Firing some of them is as fun as it is frugal.

But removing waste is an aspirin for a cancer patient.  Elon Musk’s brief efficiency push didn’t address looming doom.  Entitlements have doomed us to an unfathomable debt burden since nobody in the White House seems to notice.  But at least nobody can retire comfortably.

The antisocial insecure scheme is the prototypical government program.  Liberals cheer.  Alleged conservatives shouldn’t.  Your retirement plan could consist of trying to convince an exotic dancer to love you and take you in, and it’s be a better deal than Social Security.  You’s also have way more fun than with Washington’s mandated teasing.  But people who want to blow money as they choose don’t have a faction, which is why both unfortunate candidates demanded preserving the scheme.  We’ve got one party.  Trump enthusiasts warned us they’re protecting us from that very outcome if you’re not yet tired of empty promises.

Let’s retire the tiresome era where we have exactly zero options for voting or saving.  

Having a choice that doesn’t feature our dumb government or officeholders is a way better plan than Social Security.  During these exhausting working years, we’re only one party short of having an option.

I wish Trump lied.  The vow to preserve the embodiment of careless federal caretaking is one he should break.  Promises of preposterous gains are why he finds Social Security appealing.  Democrats whose primary addition is scaring people pretended Trump wanted to modify the ultimate Ponzi scheme.  Ineffectiveness in direct contrast to bombast is his signature.  But inertia stalls the alleged overthrower of the establishment.

Transitioning to a private contribution system seems like an obvious goal for the political grouping that ostensibly opposes coercively rotten bargains that are anything but.  One might think the purported commercial titan of a president would’ve used his extensive business knowledge to realize government sucks.  Yet the business genius whose idea of dominant innovation involves slapping his name in gold on garbage is inherently attracted to the concept of claiming something lousy helps.

Take the same money deducted from every paycheck and put it in a mutual fund.  There: I solved the Social Security crisis.  Skittish potential investors would get better results from sticking sums in a savings account or cigar box.  A zero percent return outpaces Treasury payouts.  Like income tax returns, you’re just getting what had been yours back.  This time, it just takes way longer.

No magical spell will make Washington manage money well or at all.  Pretending everyone has a Gringotts Bank-style vault has led to fortunes disappearing.  It’s not a clever magic trick.  The difference between Social Security and Harry Potter is the latter is a known fantasy.

“Gullible Boomers” is redundant.  America’s parents are still opening virus attachments in emails.  Pliable elders take a break from announcing you shouldn’t accept Facebook friend requests purporting to be from them on account of how they were hacked to proclaim they must get their dole every month.  Otherwise, there’ll be riots spoking out from Old Country Buffet.

Your lockbox doesn’t lock.  The worst possible deal shouldn’t shock anyone remotely familiar with federal shenanigans.  Washington ripping off everyone forced to interact with it might be worth noticing one of these decades.  But the scammed are too busy waiting for their payments to arrive.

The retirement sham should be retired.  Gentle dupes are convinced they’re getting back what they paid in, which would be sweet if it weren’t so pathetic.  Getting junkies hooked on aid is the costliest part.  Squandered trillions are a lot, too.

Embracing entitlements revolves around the notion that government cares for them.  A lifetime that should’ve been spent collecting evidence that the precise opposite occurs is instead spent killing time until collecting checks.  Please don’t offer direct deposit: that computer voodoo is as scary as app downloading.

The notion that greedy people don’t care about future generations is popular amongst those demanding their handouts as America’s bankrupted.  The eternal demand to get shorted nearly as bad as the delusion that they weren’t paying a tax.

Arsonists condemn flames.  Old-timers tell sob stories about pensioners who have only Social Security to rely on from those demonic enemies of mathematics who created the very woeful situation.  Short-sighted confiscators can’t even conceive of a universe where humans plan ahead.

Dependency is a self-fulfilling prophecy.  When it comes to a retirement plan that involves no planning, controlling people with regularly-dispensed pittances continues through the end.

[anthonybialy]

Buffalo Sabres Rob Bank

KeyBank wants to remain linked to the Buffalo Sabres.  I worry they’d lose your money.  A novel take on interest allows the franchise to keep profiting even if they’re not winning.  And they’re definitely not.

A hockey company gloating about continuing to sell the name of where they technically compete surely knows just what fans want.  Judging by the volume of social media posts the Sabres shared about their windfall, we’re supposed to be impressed.  Yet we refuse to offer congratulations.  Making bank from a bank is way easier than getting stubborn fans to buy tickets for the only club that’s missed the playoffs this many times in a row.  This seems like a good time to point out there have been five presidential elections since the last time the Sabres won a series.

A currency stream won’t stop flowing based on standings.  You don’t even need to make the postseason to keep the payments arriving.  That’s particularly good news for the outfit in question.  A bank slapping its name on a venue hasn’t even led to members of the public getting free pens.  There’s nowhere at the cashless arena to get a roll of quarters, so that’s another reason to skip a game.

The Sabres care about their fans except for the part where they smirk about how much 

gasconade they’ve spewed in the name of perpetuating corporate blemishing.  Adding the financial institution’s symbol to the away helmet proves nothing’s sacred.  The  unnervingly enthusiastic about sullying uniforms with a logo that’s not a buffalo over sabres.  Why not?  It brings them bucks.

The one thing I feared was that the Sabres weren’t making enough.  Sure, they take in a couple ducats from unfathomable television deals, conning the occasional sucker to fork over enough to cover obscene ticket prices, and the equivalent of a housing payment for an oil can of beer.  But there needs to be overhead funding.

There’s nothing about which to gloat.  Of course, that won’t stop them.  The Sabres are way too proud about conning a pecuniary depository into bafflingly extending its unfortunate association.  The most tone-deaf organization in pro sports is hurt that you don’t care about its windfall.

The Sabres aren’t going play in a spot with a historical appellation linked to its neighborhood or honoring those who perished during a war.  That would be tacky.  Find a conglomerate that wants the ad space for respectability.

Being excited about maintaining the fourth bank name is as baffling as Buffalo fans who boast they still call the home field of the Bills Ralph Wilson or Rich Stadium.  Nobody should feel enthusiastic about the vainglorious owner who named it after himself while whining about lack of revenue or previous corporate sponsor, respectively.  I’d have been impressed if the Sabres started calling their base the Crossroads Arena.  But a name describing the location doesn’t create passive income for someone worth 10 figures.

I understand banks are where the money is.  Willie Sutton knew the same.  The difference between the Sabres and a robber is that the latter is honest about thieving.  The hockey bandits can use the infusion to fund desperately-needed improvements.  Um, right?  Peeling paint paired with a dull atmosphere sets the right mood for perennial underachieving.  We can’t even have fun losing.  A bank sign is fitting for a place with the vibe of a lobby.

Government ownership always leads to poor outcomes.  It’s especially so with this government.  Anyone who thinks that Erie County is good at anything is susceptible to ticket sales pitches by the Sabres.  There’s not much of a waiting list.  Honorary Sabre Mark Poloncarz unsurprisingly thinks the solution is a different governmental level and not selling the building to the tenant so it can invest on its own.  The Sabres wouldn’t just enjoy the pride of ownership: they’d reap the profits.  Some call it the free market.  It’s what’s in the county that makes the place worthwhile.  That doesn’t count the hockey side.

A business’s name on a county-owned facility is sadly unsurprising.  This is the area that’s forcing taxpayers to fund a multibillionaire’s business expenses.  The only way to make such shameless welfare more wasteful is to plop a stadium in the same remote and particularly snowy area.  There will be no development around a sinkhole, which is doubly awful considering they had the precedent of the previous regrettable decision made over half a century ago.

A plethora of announcements about the corporate name was insufficient.  The very aware Sabres paired dull details what they found thrilling with a bombardment of solicitations for tickets.  They aren’t selling for some reason.  The organization is specifically struggling to fill the home opener in a baffling situation.  Why wouldn’t supporters want to see their beloved squad for the first chance in months?

There’s a better way to attempt to fill seats than pleading to take a handout.  All it takes is mild competence, so forget it.  Ownership isn’t going to panic just because they’ve overseen ghastly results for their entire tenure.  It’s only been like a decade and a half.  This team doesn’t deserve its fans.

You don’t have to worry about Terry Pegula falling short of bus fare.  He might still hitchhike.  The owner’s favorite hobby is doing anything he can to not spend money.  It’s certainly not watching his hockey team win.  Trying to explain to Pegula he’d make even more if he were willing to invest a little is as futile as attempting to inform him why a hockey school manager is unqualified to serve as an NHL general manager.

Making the playoffs during this naming deal is the seemingly unreachable goal.  They have until 2036.  Any normal club would scoff at such an effortless challenge.  But there’s nothing normal about the Buffalo Sabres.  Their eagerness to boast about a bank daft enough to pay to associate with them flaunts their priorities.  Some foolish teams make money by selling seats to fans who enjoy seeing winning.

[anthonybialy]

Sydney Sweeney's Enemies Flaunt Bad Genes

Sydney Sweeney can do it all.  America’s dream girl even irks the right people better than those who make it their goal to own the libs.  She just has to be herself.  That makes her infinitely more appealing than the sort of people inventing reasons to lamely try to tear down someone whose looks are only part of the attractiveness they loathe.

Being jealous that she’s better at plays on words comes naturally to the illogically resentful.  Reading a script a copywriter cued up for her still sort-of counts.  Noticing “jeans” is a homonym for “genes” is the basis for a cute ad campaign that’s innocuous to everyone imbued with sense.  That leaves out social justice warriors, who are intrinsically indignant.  They started fuming faster about alleged Aryan undertones than their enemy gets a million Instagram likes.  Anti-Sydneys believe in collectivism to the point that they want to make everyone else suffer for their joyless warping of reality.

The transgression of having blonde hair and blue eyes is unforgivable to passive activist leftists.  It’s the only thing they consider a crime.  Meanwhile, Illegal aliens sneak in as their first crime while subway-shoving is New York City’s only thriving industry.  Democrats let their constituency commit felonies at will while condemning the model of models for appreciating having worthwhile traits passed down.

Sydney’s a Republican? Fine: I’ll date her.  The alleged affiliation further infuriated all the right people who are outraged that a successful actress and model might oppose property taxes.  Being reasonable is the worst violation they could imagine.

There are two sides.  It’s just that one is preposterous.  Exhausting types who attempt to initiate a national conversation about race over a trousers commercial are the same ones kvetching about presenting both cases because they think the one in favor of deporting those not allowed here while lowering taxes is too diabolical to be worth hearing.  The same exhausting humans make their case for why the clothier is a secret concentration camp proponent.  Journalism is about indulging cranks by pretending they have an argument worth considering.

People who think Sydney tempts in jeans and those who think she’ll soon be starring in an Ilsa: She Wolf of the SS reboot that’ll be a documentary are not equivalent.  That won’t stop the ever-fair media from offering both sides even though one is full of insufferable self-parodying lunatics.  “Widely-panned” is the journalistic version of claiming Sydney Sweeney isn’t that hot.  They do that, too.  You’d feel bad for adherents of hideousness if they didn’t inflict their delusions on everyone else.  

Daftness dominates.  Even noting which people are not serious gets treated seriously.  Pretending the least offensive ad campaign possible is the only insidious behavior on display.  The American Eagle jeans as a Panzer uniform non-controversy is as silly as the imaginary black Stormtrooper panic, with the difference being you can find leftists who sincerely think Sydney dons denim to pimp master race ideology.

Oh: they’re serious.  Amplifying a loud fringe is an attempt to make it go mainstream.  Such lunacy occasionally sadly catches on in these allegedly advanced times.  Suddenly, Gina Carano isn’t part of the Star Wars universe anymore after believing Baby Yoda’s pronouns are set, J.K. Rowling is treated as worse than Voldemort for knowing magic can’t change genders, and Chick-fil-A is demonized for being run by Christians who make delicious sandwiches.

Selling denim is for greedy merchants who want more money for nothing more than selling things customers want.  Spiritual descendants of East Germans already see anyone engaged in commerce as decadently corrupt.  If they think there’s a secret message adulating Göring, forget it.

Sending secret messages that can only be read by those with Fourth Reich decoder rings is a war crime only they discern.  Sinister dispatches are hidden openly in apparel advertisements.  Conglomerates are eagerly supporting the monstrous regime.  The fact nobody else sees imminent danger is part of the alarming plan.

American Eagle ironically lured out the Jeans Nazis.  Attempting to link casual pants with a rather stringent form of white supremacy means Bizarro Simon Wiesenthals have reached the apex of absurdity.  They’re attending a function at their personal Kehlsteinhaus.  When one has decided your enemies are purveyors of utter monstrosity, one will find examples without evidence.  There’s as much of a case to be made that those who think PBS should be voluntary funded by viewers are Nazis as the casual outfitter in question is.

Do you know what other country used a majestic bird as a symbol?  You can practically see the American Eagle logo winking.  Things regular people say as jokes are taken seriously by seekers of invisible clues.  Thinking the okay symbol means white power served as the eye-rolling precedent.  America’s resistance soldiers carry on the legacy of listening to rock records backward.  Spotify doesn’t offer the option to hear secret messages from Satan’s messengers, so make sure to support physical media.

Anti-Semites are concerned that Adolph Hitler’s ghost has possessed American Eagle’s CEO.  The only thing worse than claiming those who find Sydney Sweeney to be a wise choice for selling bottoms has a Karl Dönitz-autographed swastika under their mattresses is when such a patently absurd case is made by the voluntary Hamas public relations agency.  Spot them by how they accuse others of being secret Nazis as they openly back the terror state trying to exterminate the one Jewish country.  Controlling others via enforcing their belief system by law comes naturally to the oblivious.

Thankfully, the pathetic manufactured dispute is washing out like barbeque sauce out of indigo-dyed cotton.  Pre-treating makes all the difference.  Sweetheart Sweeney doesn’t even seem to be aware anyone’s fuming at her, which is the proper response to irrational lunacy.  She’s too busy being hot while cashing checks.

Invading retail spaces is part of American Eagle’s goal of domination.  Aren’t you alarmed by the authoritarian implications of its name?  Or the initials SS of its most prominent employee?  If not, I offer congratulations on being normal and decent.  The true fascists are trying to make dungarees aficionados feel guilty.  Sydney couldn’t be more innocent.

[anthonybialy]

Way Back a Few Years

Of course the present sucks.  You’re aware of what world this is.  But these rotten current moments still seem rosy compared to some of the hellish years we’ve already endured, so cheer up.

Innately confused humans tend to live not just in the past but the worst part of it.  Brains that focus on torturing the humans to which they belong don’t even have to go back that far, which also saves them from being taxed reaching for distant anguish.

A 2020 mentality casts a shadow on 2025.  The collective has seemed to back off on claiming America is a Jim Crow hellhole that needs consistent state supervision.  But the trauma haunts.

People who feel nostalgic for autocratic eras want others to forget who’s responsible.  A few traitors casually enabled the most appalling putzes possible to commandeer basic outcomes.  Participants forgot about memory loss.  Hoping their victims move past torment is part of the domination.  The punishers always demand moving on from the harm they caused.  

Hypocrisy is merely a garnish.  Absolute rulers who were absolutely full of it cited their right to do as they please while confiscating yours.   Hopping the very barriers intend to prevent them from infringing was a nice touch.  A party presently dedicated to ensuring the rights of lawbreakers to continue plying their trades sets the goal in its leaders.  From muggers to illegal immigrants, the constituency is continually inspired by politicians who do as they please while ordering everyone else to obey.  You’ve got some nerve to object.

Begging for flogging is a fetish that should be kept in private tabs.  Sickos thought Democratic governors would protect them from getting sick.  That’s the worst symptom of all.  Humans so useless that they had to get into the business of telling others what to do need the force of quasi-law to make their commands stick.  They tellingly can’t negotiate or help voluntarily.  A republic with democratic principles relies on the consent of the governed.  These days, said consent is given by those in charge on a whim.

Another election between vying cults led to learning how shopping carts will feel sparse.  Both the current and erstwhile Democrat felt strongly about the necessity of vigorous intervention to help you by making everyday items unobtainable.  You had the choice of slightly different styles if you’re bitchy about being denied decisions.  Choosing between high taxes and high tariffs shows life features options.  One is more comfortable using an American flag as a prop.  Either way, your loving government spends a fortune every moment of pilfered or borrowed funds.

Some freaks enjoy being told what to do.  Republicans who used to pretend to be independent now flaunt their fetishes publicly.  Telling others they must, as well is part of a two-party system where each demands wholesale compliance.

Chinese commies infected the world to show how many ideological pals they have.  Countless humans feared the dreadful prospect of their own notions, much less those made by others.  Demanding to be humiliated is the closest many get to exercising free will.  Those who need a bit of guidance from society’s bosses wanted their requests to buy provisions approved.  Masochists seeking sadists found each other.  That explains voting tendencies.  Being told it was for their safety is the lame excuse of every tyrant ever.

Times are rough, but at least nobody feels free.  Demands made by one negotiating party have been successfully implemented other than that.  Permitting casual diktats embodies everything wrong with interdictions into our days.  Violating the most basic of rights in order to make life worse is how politicians inspire.  Anticipate anti-bullying initiatives from dispensers of purple nurples.

We’ve already been tread upon in the same way Idiocracy wasn’t set in the future.  Pretending DEFCON 1 Red Alert is only for special occasions and not an alarm to ignore in the background like a streaming episode of The Office.  You won’t notice the siren or Kevin dropping the chili.  Constant excuses for endless infiltrations are the signature of those a majority of humans have conceded to make determinations for all.

Warping reality so pain seems normal is the sickest way of coping with life.  Vigorous political offenders take the same approach to solving poverty, namely making everyone poor.  Do it once in order for the aspiration level to set.  Creating the precedent is the important step for the sort of politicians who pray that entitlement recipients will demand the checks keep rolling.  Liberals only think of consequences when they’re planning to exert their dominion.  Foresight is not exercised, say, when spending money that’s not theirs on things nobody wants.

Aspiring regents couldn’t even control people correctly.  Careful schemers spent their whole lives preparing to hassle and despotism just fizzled out.  It sure was nice when overlords told scruffy subjects that they could get haircuts again.  Projectors of ultimate clout are not going to announce their reigns as emergency royals have concluded.  You must pay attention to notice big moves that disappear gradually.

Electing the right people doesn’t mean seeking those who’d be slightly more competent at bossing others around in areas outside their jurisdiction.  True political heroes realize they’re neither allowed nor qualified to tell people minding their own business what to do and more importantly what they can’t.

Pretending they weren’t enjoying it was the toughest part of the most invasive time.  That applies to those harassing, not those who saw their freedoms dissipate.  The latent overreach can be reactivated at any panic.  Dwight Schrute promising to give back authority when this crisis is over embodies wannabe totalitarian.  If you don’t want a particularly unpleasant person running your office, don’t let the same individual run a state or nation.

[anthonybialy]

Higher Scores and Other Wins with Josh Allen

Wins are not a quarterback stat, according to observers who doubt the player most responsible has the strongest impact.  That one guy who typically attempts passes determines results even more than the first person to touch the ball.  It’s not to put down centers to note that the next guy’s decisions and actions govern the future.  One team finally exploits the link.  Josh Allen’s record is no coincidence.  

Going 76-34 sounds about right, which is to say astounding.  Winning more than twice as often as losing is pretty fair, no?  Bills fans are trying to enjoy the chance to show frequent victories won’t make us unappreciative.  In Buffalo, that’s known as the Bandits standard.

The Bills uncannily changed when they drafted one person.  Going 51-61 in the previous seven campaigns offers a painfully fitting summary of just how much the right person can change everything.  He didn’t just happen to show up when they started getting good.

If you don’t already feel like a geezer, Allen entering his eighth season will shock the understanding of the timeline.  He’s getting along in his career if management feels like getting him an All-Pro receiver as a gift.

Allen is best hope ever for a franchise that still hasn’t pulled to even.  If you’ve ever watched a Bills game, they’ve likely lost.  The franchise is 486-505 with eight annoying ties.  And the career mark includes the Allen era where winning has been blessedly common.  The oft-woeful franchise has hovered around 50 or 60 games under even for most of this century.  

Josh’s playoff record doesn’t look as impressive.  But 7-6 mark is still excellent without asterisks.  The accelerated pace of postseason appearances and advancement is an accomplishment itself.  He’s been the quarterback for one-third of all Bills playoff wins if anyone’s feeling spoiled.

An exclusive club could use more members.  When it comes to other team quarterbacks with postseason wins, Jim Kelly had nine, Frank Reich and Jack Kemp each managed two, and Joe Ferguson won once.  The good thing about the list of Bills quarterbacks with postseason victories is that it’s easy to memorize.

The usual qualifications about postseason outcomes apply in Josh’s case not only to make excuses for him.  Playoff qualifiers don’t get to play Cleveland.  Padding a record gets a bit trickier.

More infrequent wins after proceeding has a precedent.  You may not know that commercial pitchman Peyton Manning also played football.  He was actually pretty good at it.  But his totals plummet after moving on in a reflection of the stakes, not his abilities.  A 186-79 record in regular games compared to one game over .500 in the postseason is an advanced version of Josh’s accumulations.  The title creates as big a difference as is possible.  Yet the ratio is eerily similar.

Crediting Allen for a spectacular regular season while barely treading water record-wise in the tournament only sounds like a double standard.  I’m more than willing to create one for him.  But elevated competition means higher stakes.  Statistics are a helpful indifferent tool that nonetheless can’t overtake what’s seen.  Anyone who watches the Bills knows Allen is precisely the last person to blame for not progressing.

Letting down our savior is part of being human.  Now, stop demonstrating the aspect.  I don’t want to count how many times his coach has betrayed his bold meal ticket with meekness.  And I merely want to review charges against Dalton Kincaid for catharsis.

Buffalo’s superhero modestly requests assistance.  Even Superman occasionally needs the Justice League.  Completing secondary tasks is not menial even if the most prominent member vanquishes relatively stronger villains.

The most driven player is driving.  Allen is the opposite of a passenger.  We’re lucky enough to be onboard for the ride.  The rider list includes many teammates.

Wondering how someone so competitive can seem so calm is just another fascinating aspect of our dreamboat’s personality.  His agreeable demeanor is still suckering foes.  Internal focus is difficult to spot until a miracle completed heave or unbelievable scramble.  Allen does nothing for show either on the field or off.  Ruthless efficiency isn’t necessarily showy.

The prospect change upon adding exactly a particular player is reflection of quarterback’s singular importance.  One position has more affect on the game than any other.  And Allen has more affect on the game than any other quarterback.  Clubs may as well exploit the weighted importance.

Racking up wins becomes a habit for the focused.  Beating the Dolphins is a start.  Throw in a Hollywood marriage as yet another victory.  It’s not a royal wedding because both participants have earned everything they possess.

Many football commenters still maintain that wins are not a quarterback statistic.  But they should be, at least in Allen’s case.  Winning the MVP is a slight against everyone else on the roster.  Being named the person who’s most valuable to his team means everyone else does the least percentage-wise.  The Hasek rule applies to the present football roster.  A little help would benefit everyone a lot.  That includes the franchise’s most prominent employee.  I would say he’s already helped others.

[anthonybialy]

Private Broadcasting Service

What next: forking over one’s own bread for groceries?  Buying items you use gets so expensive.  The trend of people getting rung up for what’s theirs is upsetting for dedicated freeloaders.  Suckers don’t want to bill Washington for their dry goods and wet services.  Duh: that’s way cheaper.

Public television has always been for a infinitesimally small portion of the group.  Now, that sliver of the populace that thinks Rick Steves should be subsidized for traveling get to address their ideology directly.  The chance to flaunt what they believe is a blessing despite their grumbling.

It’s so mean to charge those actually watching.  But the only thing worse is to bill the collective for what a quite small slice of dismissive twits consider enlightening programming.  The patronizing should patronize.  We can call it a subscription fee.

A recurring tally for what each person uses sounds like taking responsibility for one’s actions, and that’s nearly as monstrous.  Everything is connected.  

PBS and NPR are still regrettably on the air.  The diabolical Republican scheme to cancel them like they’re actors who won’t announce pronouns has failed.  Instead, there’s an even more insidious plot to hold watchers accountable.

There’s no reason why people who don’t like their programs should be taxed to pay for it.  And there’s also no reason why people who do should.  A model where those using the thing pop quarters in the slot seems so unfair to the un-underwritten.

Christiane Amanpour shouldn’t have ever been getting welfare.  Presuming anything getting federal cash sacks deserved it to begin with is the sort of illogical rot that gets endorsed by PBS programming.  Cutting bucks for the very therapy craved by government’s most zealous enthusiasts is an extra dose of cruelty here in the Fourth Reich.  Even the Nazis never invaded Sesame Street.

The deluded mentality is the same one that figures a tax code designed to punish success must be at correct levels.  Government did it, and those in power can’t get anything wrong.  That would throw off the whole system.  Cutting funding for All Things Considered is a free speech violation as if it weren’t forcing taxpayers to bankroll messages isn’t the problem in the first place.  

Why aren’t all bars open?  It’s way more affordable.  The sort of guests who don’t tip while drinking at weddings are outraged they’re expected to open wallets for binges.

Society should realize that it will benefit from having another art history degree holder to the point it should be forced to cover student loans.  Forgiveness isn’t just for borrowed tuition: it’s for anyone so greedy that they doubt the virtues of sponsoring the degrees of others.

Let’s be magnanimous toward those too ignorant to realize they must be taxed to further the educational goals of those who don’t want to leave campus.  Jeff Bezos will cover his endless wedding rentals but not your diploma because the man who sells you anything you want hates your guts.  Burger King screws you over by making you pay for your Whopper.

The allegedly compassionate are appalled by GoFundMe drives for medical procedures.  Their horror must be why they never donate themselves.  Thinking cures are complimentary if government pays is as sick as it gets.  I hate to inform those afflicted with an inability to grasp economics that invoices accompany medical procedures.  Greedy doctors expect compensation, as do janitors.  Paying for scalpel sharpeners and lights to see where they’re cutting adds up, too.  Make the right kind of incisions.

The alternative to the fantasy of thinking nothing costs anything if assessed to the government is way more sinister, so maybe patent doltishness is preferable.  Make rich people pay for anything you deem essential to maximize self-righteousness.  Costs skyrocket when others are made to endow outlays, but not seeing the price seems to make it cheaper.

Billing someone else is their philosophy’s basis.  Calling it a philosophy implies they thought things out, which is generous in a way they’re not.  At least it’s morally rotten, too.  The initial obligation is the abomination, not reversing the infringement.

Nothing horrifies liberals like having to buy what they use.  Sure, they’re also aghast at people getting ahead and America thriving.  But they’re resentful of being expected to cover their own expenditures at the core.  Projecting their aversion to using their own personal currency explains their outlook.  Making everyone buy what only a few use embodies selfishness.  Overcompensation competes with a lack of empathy.

Shoddy quality explains why they’re so into coercion.  Fuming about voluntary donations is inadvertently telling.  Liberals figure nobody else will pony up because they think everyone is like them.  It’s a blessing that they’re wrong.  The presumption that contributions are so unlikely that they must be mandated is baked into their miserable worldview.  There’s no justice for as long as Clifford must panhandle while people pay to access the service that allows them to watch the Happy Gilmore sequel.

Something worthwhile should be paid for with their own money.  That simple notion is controversial to compulsion junkies who are as furious about separate checks as they are confused that humans could earn enough to do so.  Anything that can’t attract support deserves to go out of business.  Kind words alone don’t pay bills.  Turning off the taxpayer spigot for fetish liberal programming allows the free market to operate, which is why public broadcasting’s fans are so ticked.

[anthonybialy]

Watching Alone Together

The best way to get along is to not interact. Going off on our own for peace is an easy solution that only seems like dodging the issue. Technology that enables all the information ever to surround us in the ether is a pleasant development for those who don’t want to associate with other humans. Misanthropy is only diluted by less contact with each other, so treasure humanity by not being near others.

A fragmented world means getting to choose our own feeds. The free market has freed everyone in the market. Choice horrifies liberals who do everything they can to make it impossible to change plans. If you hope they’ll stop shrieking that insurers are killing customers, you’ve never dealt with any.

Family time is overrated to anyone who has one. It takes nostalgia paired with obliviousness to miss the old days of everyone staring at a Trinitron the size of a Volkswagen in silence so nobody missed a crucial Head of the Class plot development. Compromise tuning made everyone equally unhappy. Viewers didn’t complain because it beat the alternative of talking to relatives. Screen time was measured on a curve in multiple senses.

Families don’t have to bicker about which of four channels to watch if households seem more tranquil. Instead, everyone gets to watch one of a million options. Unity means reaching consensus that the taste of every other relative sucks.

Never learning to compromise creates a generation of brats. But each side having to give in is a sign of progress. Both getting exactly what they want is a way better deal. It’s better to learn how to cope with being spoiled just like obesity is a better problem than starvation.

Trending shows that nobody else is aware exists seem like they were made for just you, the clever searcher who unearthed the Easter egg. A feature every single fan seems to be tweeting about shows that small audiences can compensate with fervency.

Broad appeal is as obsolete as a television on the floor. With no hope of capturing a sizable audience, evening lectures from behind desks quintuple down on sectarian cheerleading. The Daily Show precedent means ardent disciples seek echos for their nonsense by reducing consumption of dissent as more options become available. Self-righteousness will have to suffice if you don’t find a raised eyebrow and pencil tap in response to any Republican existing hilarious.

Tuning into a network offers the chance to be harangued. I can’t imagine why streaming is popular. Poor souls with busted wifi and broken remotes are running out of time to enjoy Stephen Colbert’s patented unfunny deadpan sanctimonious lecture routine. They still possess the chance to hear Jimmy Kimmel cheering for a CEO’s executor when he’s not using his baby as a prop for socialized medicine. Spare a thought for worshipers with glazed eyes who tune in voluntarily. Marginal cult leaders can’t get laughs even from their devotees, but they can spur applause.

Bleak present options don’t mean past ones were fantastic. Tired geezers inevitably cite Johnny Carson as the embodiment of broad appeal. But all the monopoly winner had to do was be more entertaining than a test pattern. The other networks might have been spurred to create amusing midnight alternatives if the one host available to audiences had suddenly cheered for Walter Mondale.

Lies no longer seem official. News consumers no longer have to count on, say, Walter Cronkite to deliver his preferred falsehoods pompously. Now, those eager to be informed can be lied to by the option of one’s choice. At least it’s much harder for the very objective media to lie on behalf of furthering their regrettable agenda. Rightful skeptics spend a few seconds checking facts and another few mocking the results.

A decent show will be over by the time you figure out where to stream it. You could still watch at your leisure on account of how the pause button works even if it will seem jarring to live tweet. Missing shared experiences seems like a societal loss. But most of those with whom we shared were disagreeable dolts.

Liberals oppose free markets because they decide poorly. I’m almost sympathetic to their example. A life that’s truly about choices means being free to make bad ones. Browsing the marketplace of ideas to reinforce their lousy notions shows their opposition to it. The logic conforms in its twisted way.

Serving as our own programers doesn’t just show the job is fairly easy. Media feeds are tailored to each person even as each person enjoys a different media feed. Everyone got just what they wanted. People should seem a bit happier. Making discerning choices is the downside of not having a network executive choose what you’re going to witness. It’s as fun viewing freely as it is making them superfluous.

Having to construct a daily schedule beats having to consume official ones. The editorial process whereby people possessing the credential of a useless degree reaffirmed partisan mendacity. Verification is a trick when the next layer of partial hacks is in on the con.

Step back from the screen for a moment. No, I don’t mean to talk to humans or go hiking. It’s just worthwhile to spend a moment appreciating the wondrous era where technology’s greatest benefit is intaking whatever we want. We’re not stuck with three pompously biased nitwits for a sense of what’s happening nationally any more than we are choosing between ALF and MacGyver.

Value present times for more than how fun it is to mock dreadful sitcoms. Responding to lame arguments shows the value of encountering blather. Check it occasionally just to be reminded why it’s nice to be able to tune elsewhere.

[anthonybialy]

Buffalo Bills Run Past Von Miller

Von Miller will not help the Bills this year.  Nothing’s changed.  Roster status is technically different.  He’s no longer on the payroll, as his contract burdens a different sucker now.  The salary cap percentage is nearly as alarming as giving that much cash to a player who’s now doing little.  The contrast between his previous and present abilities remind us that nothing is permanent.  I wish they realized that in 2022.

Washington bought Rite Aid stock.  This is surely the best time to invest.  Nobody will expect the purchase.  Figuring he’s still worth over six million dollars this season is like buying a video rental store before anyone else detects the comeback trend.  It’s not like the Bills bought low.  But paying for a name at this point is especially silly for a club that chose to call itself the Commanders.

The track champion stopped applying his talents to the sport for which he was employed.  Running straight up the field is a cunning strategy if quarterbacks are only allowed to head in the same direction.  But I just checked the rules and learned they are free to roam anywhere.  Miller was a success if crossing the next line was the goal.  Give him a medal.  

I have to be fair even if I don’t want to.  Admitting my ex is talented doesn’t mean I want the person around.  Miller was productive for a bit.  But there’s an elevated injury risk for a player who had established himself awhile ago.  The fear of continued deterioration is especially heightened when it comes to a 36-year-old tasked with evading blockers then tracking down slippery quarterbacks.

Miller’s declining production offers an unneeded reminder of how devastating getting hurt can be for a virtually superhuman skills competition.  Comparing eight sacks in his first 11 games versus six in his final 25 confirms what everyone saw.  The same ligaments which enable a remarkable range of motion are nagging detriments after they’re torn.  Feeling amazed he played 36 games for the Bills isn’t even the biggest story.

Thinking of how hard it is to do spreadsheets with a mild headache puts athletic injuries in perspective.  A calf twinge from crossing legs too long in a job involving sitting puts a profession requiring constant peak physical performance in context.  You don’t have to feel sorry for multimillionaires who got that rich by playing a game.  But noting human fragility highlights how tough it is to excel.  You don’t have to remind me: I’m a Buffalo sports fan.

Cherish small victories after overall disappointments.  I didn’t buy a shirt with Miller on it, which means I avoid the conundrum of whether to deem it obsolete or wear apparel as dated as a leisure suit while trying to justify it as a throwback.  It’s not like it would even bring to mind fond memories.  I did donate to Children’s Hospital in his name, which I suppose they can keep.  I request they remove the link to him, as I want the contribution to be effective.

Von’s con wouldn’t have worked on his own.  Every timeshare salesman needs a customer willing to be suckered.  He knew just the mark.  Brandon Beane has all the confidence of someone who’s done everything right and the record of someone who obtained Josh Allen and not much else.  Any fading salesman looking for leads should set up a meeting in Orchard Park.  Glengarry Highlands and Glen Ross Farms would be better real estate investments than another stadium stuck in the suburbs.

Adding Miller was an effort to widen the chasm between Josh Allen and opposing quarterbacks.  A defensive counterpart ideally provides indirect assistance.  It’d be great to help the MVP by making it so he didn’t have to singlehandedly manufacture so many touchdowns.  Instead, Miller provided open lanes for enemies to drive through.  Josh sighs while accepting his increased scoring requirement.

It’s not just his play that was difficult to decipher.  Bills followers found themselves trying to determine if the oddball things Miller said were profound or just daft.  In a darker aspect, it was unpleasant to read excerpts from a police report to see whether he assaulted his partner or was just arguing with her.  Overreacting by calling law enforcement is not a great best-case scenario.  Hoping that he at worst got in a nasty verbal argument is now another franchise’s problem.

Bills fans hoped Miller’s signing served as an indicator.  Unfortunately, it did.  He was certain he joined a contender he’d put over the top.  But the actual outcome involved overestimating both team and personal potential.  A twisted granted wish shows how a transaction can summarize status in the wrong way.  Miller affected the future in his way.

Optimists hoped for more than what the contract contained.  Naturally, there was less.  Fans craving for a sign that this is finally a different era hoped the Bills were getting not just a Hall of Fame quarterback hunter but also evidence that applicants would contact the company as opposed to the other way around.  The pending Hall of Famer ideally offered a sign that Super Bowl seekers wanted to be part of what Buffalo had.  Instead, Miller overestimated his own remaining contributions just like his now-previous employer did.

Don’t get too excited.  That’s what happened when Miller arrived, and we’re experiencing the downside of expectations meeting reality.  The erstwhile Bills may trend on Twitter this season after an occasional colossal sack for the erstwhile Redskins.  He might even get close to full health.  Buffalo fans will feel a tinge of regret and wonder if he was worth retaining.  But let it pass by like an offensive tackle watching him run toward the end zone.

[anthonybialy]

Stephen Colbert’s Late Late Show

Stephen Colbert is the voice, wit, and conscience of his generation.  I know he appreciates deadpan.  The pending derelict might call me a liar, but he could surely respect me doing the same with his precedent.

A guy losing money working must be doing a great job.  Colbert costing his employer doesn’t seem like a good way to run a business.  It’s no wonder he holds the beliefs he does.  The chair-filler who got rich presiding over a lightly-viewed television hour is insulated from his preferred policies.  That’s just one benefit of being paid a fortune while losing one.  Their hero getting canned shows the free market functioning properly, which makes liberals even more upset. 

Colbert’s fans are hilarious.  The fact it’s unintentional doesn’t change how many laughs they generate.  Taking after him is their tribute.  Raging confusion over why their idol won’t be reinforcing their delusions every weeknight reveals confusion about economics.  Like everything else they contribute, it’s inadvertent.

Clapter’s connoisseurs think corporations possess cash stockpiles randomly assigned by a cruel universe.  As a result of such twisted presumptions, they deeply believe beneficiaries of unfairness should be willing to fritter away what they’ve wrongly obtained on allegedly noble causes as an apology.  Subsidizing resistance is a moral obligation if you think you’re the only heroes preventing the Fourth Reich from beginning in 2025 America.

Wealth consists of having access to vaults full of currency to deplete until there’s nothing left.  At least, that’s what Colbert’s worshipers claim as a tenet of faith.  Evening smarminess on behalf of absolute state dominion wielded by someone other than Trump is a cause so righteous that it can’t be linked to creating value.

Car and dishwasher builders didn’t think it was worth spending on someone who manufactures smugness.  CBS does not have enough potential customers watching after the late local news to justify purchasing half a minute of time to make a pitch.  Expecting a person entrusted with filling television time attract enough consumers to sell airtime is for meanie Republicans.

A small rabid faction demands ceaseless appeasement.  Colbert prompted debate if deciding whether his zealots blaspheme by not watching as religiously as they claim or if there are too few of them to begin with counts.

Replacing an interview show with reruns of another Big Bang Theory prequel or NCIS: Boise alarms specialists at telling companies how to run themselves.  Using political leverage to try to pressure a corporation is exactly what psychological projectors claim Donald Trump is doing.  They fear their archenemy is elbowing in on their racket.  Democratic politicians fuming while asking questions about why a private broadcaster ended an unprofitable show featuring their humorless ally provide their own answer.

Colbert challenged those in authority, claim countless elected Democrats.  Those to whom he sucked up claim it’s essential to resist political control if the other side has it.  If a politician likes your political humor show, it confronts nothing but the definition of humor.  I am shocked that sleepy humans who wanted to be entertained before bedtime were uninterested in watching Adam Schiff.

Partisans revel in double standards.  There’s a chilling environment where you can’t mock the president, claim people who freaked out when anyone noticed Joe Biden couldn’t finish sentences or words.

CBS should continue going bankrupt with Colbert to show Trump.  Liberals can’t imagine generating something patrons will pay to devour and are thrilled to waste a corporation’s treasure.  They don’t see the problem.

There simply must be more to dragging the Late Show franchise to the curb than an enterprise wanting to have more revenue.  Don’t those heartless television fiends care about more than staying open?  Greed is when someone other than you earns.

You’d think liberals would be fine with condemning a conglomerate for halting production of a commodity with a scarce quantity of buyers.  But their usual griping about the sin of ending up with a surplus is insufficient to classify blasphemy against one of their prophets.  A conspiracy that aligns with their ideology doesn’t need facts for them to believe it.  As usual, the wild tale involves denying evidence.

The state’s executive doubles as one for CBS if unhinged critics are to be believed.  It’s impossible in the presently repressive political environment for the alleged Tiffany Network’s overseers to decide the insufferable twerp who morphed into the unpleasant character he played shouldn’t be inflicted on a smattering of onlookers anymore.  The one thing the White House won’t permit is a low-rated and widely-despised host of a declining format that he helped shove.

Letting Colbert mouth off for another 10 months punishes everyone.  You really want to drag out a cancellation.  Make waiting for Biden to finish his term seem like changing the channel.  Going hunting with Michael Scott seems decisive by comparison.  

Come back here and watch.  Blaming the fractured audience for breaking away is a popular coping mechanism for those holding sledgehammers.  Uncooperative gallery ditchers insist on choosing their own programming on their magic glowing screens.

Colbert would be worth skipping even if he was one of three options.  Streaming didn’t drive clientele from shrilly partisan lectures.  A clever show delivered by a hoary broadcaster who competed with the DuMont Network would draw a crowd of spectators, which leaves out the virus shot shill.  The  availability of more than a sign-off screen as an amusement alternative sunk Colbert’s show in the same way it’s fair for a lousy biased newspaper to blame its dwindling subscriber base on this dang internet.

Gesture at cringeworthy segments.  A political favor to Trump would be allowing his dullest critic to remain on the air.  The best thing Colbert’s foes could do is let him talk.  Pretending the president fired him is the sort of daft fantasy that falsely pretends Trump is omnipotent.  Like his critics in an obsolete genre, he doesn’t enjoy that much power.

A smartass who’s not smart will be prohibited from getting to sully the Ed Sullivan Theater with his shameful presence anymore.  I’m sure CNN or Comedy Central will provide him with a flimsy desk, although he might have to bring his own to a podcast.  If it assuaged someone fired from a wholly undeserved job he’ll stubbornly retain for over a decade, Colbert should know I laughed at his announcement,  It’s never too late to start being funny unless there’s already a countdown to the final month.  I just borrowed his shtick again.  Colbert can consider imitation as my way of keeping his legacy going even though his show isn’t.

[anthonybialy]

What Is and Isn’t Next

Tea leaves are nowhere as accurate as being contrarian.  You just need to go against what one particular president announces is coming next.  Predict the future by wagering on the opposite of what the incumbent claims.  Don’t let betting apps know.

Pretend to read tarot cards if you’d like to appear convincing.  The lock of a guarantee is based in noticing patterns, like how Donald Trump reveals what’s to happen through his dedication to saying the precise opposite.  If I didn’t know better, I’d think he was secretly offering modest clues.  But the biggest twist should be plausible.

Observation affects the outcome.  In this particular instance of quantum physics, the scientist smashes test tubes.  Trump’s own efforts sabotage his boasts, which means he controls destiny in his way.

We’re lucky he’s full of it.  Imagine the nightmare of a president who was occasionally grounded; it would make life much less reassuring.  Knowing what looms offers only so much comfort.  Investors often speak of seeking certainty, but the downside comes when conditions certainly suck.

Trump can’t do all the preposterous things he’s dreaming of implementing, so count avoided agony as a blessing.  The inability to install his demented dreams means he’s saved by ineptness.  Getting bailed out by his most unpleasant characteristics shows the universe’s sardonic sense of justice and humor.  The alleged business genius who doesn’t grasp that a trade deficit means we buy more. 

Trump will never thank a court bailing him out.  Avoiding gratitude is part of his character, especially when it would mean admitting he was wrong.  That has never happened because it is impossible for the best genius to commit an error.  Government charging for buying is going to help the economy just like the boss of it all says.  

Judges mean.  One in announced the president can’t unilaterally impose a tax on purchases.  The president!  Judge Jerkface has some nerve.  If one person can’t do what he wants, this isn’t even America.  We’re specifically discussing the person who won an election and is thus head of state, the country, and everything in it, according to sophisticated modern political theory.  If you don’t like one branch deciding everything, what are you going to do: limit government?

Letting everything be run by Washington in general and head of state in particular has certainly led to the sort of free country envisioned by its creators.  At least there’s practical damage, too.  Trump will still try his hardest to counter what he claims is a ripoff by imposing another ripoff.

Trump enjoys messing with trade like a true Republican businessman.  Taking from earners so government can squander is how we avoid getting hoodwinked.  The cure is like a vaccine where you’re given a small dose of what’s bad, aside from the part where the only illness is from the cure.  Bypassing the legislature while he’s at it is a fitting touch in its way.  A president announcing there will be tariffs on his own is so thoroughly Democratic that Joe Biden would’ve wished he thought of it back when he was capable of thinking.

The angriest Boomer knows we’re being treated unfairly.  He can’t describe how, but details are for establishment RINOs.  Other inferior countries charge a fee because their feeble industries can’t compete, so Trump counters by doing the same.  Dragging us down to the level of the rest of this crummy planet is for globalists.

An executive who hopefully expresses regret during alone time. should be secretly hoping courts toss out tariffs and his regrettable profligate budget while they’re at it.  I wish Trump Vodka’s founder drank so at least there’d be an excuse for regrettable policies framed by appallingly unearned arrogance.  The truculent boasting would remain unacceptable, but at least there’d be a cause.

The difference between effectiveness and progress becomes clear when we get regrettable presidents like this.  There’s a trending precedent.  Barack Obama checked off much of his wish list, which unsurprisingly spurred disaster.  A besieged America would’ve preferred bumbling at installing his appalling notions.

An allegedly adult president can pretend that he’s trying to elicit a negative reaction while he indulges in one of his own.  MAGA analysts who claim their savior is just needling lib foes engage in psychological projection on the level of thinking he’s a muscular savior who cares about the heartland as part of his New York City tycoon character.

Seeking conflict is not an act.  It is in the sense he’s the ultimate phony.  But the notion that he’s deliberately trolling for reactions presumes he thinks ahead, and his plan to spur the economy with a fee on everything belies the notion.  Planning out provocations like a social media master is unlikely if you’ve ever experienced the misfortune of reading his posts.

Trump is not good at anything good.  He’s proficient at spending taxpayer money like a Democrat and making everyone as miserable as he is, but those shouldn’t be marketable skills.  The emblematic egomaniac doesn’t have a philosophy aside from drooling over anyone who is slavish to him.

The president’s greatest gift is not following up.  Never matching words with actions is typically seen as a negative if you’re familiar with humans.  But most people aren’t like our president.  Exhausted citizens are relieved when he runs his mouth to no effect.  

The only thing better would be a president who implements good notions.  That sounds vague.  But Trump would surely appreciate the possibility considering his whole shtick is based in claiming he does the best things.  Details are forthcoming.  They just won’t be from him.

[anthonybialy]

86ing a 7/16 Ripoff

New Yorkers involuntarily donated to the multibillionaire stadium fund.  Beneficiaries neglect to be thankful.  The Buffalo Bills and Sabres won’t send a shirt that looks like it was designed by a chimpanzee with clip art to beleaguered and bilked taxpayers as a reward.  But they’l solicit donations if you don’t feel fleeced enough.

7/16 Day is thrilling for those who care about the area code.  A randomly-assigned prefix as part of an obsolete system for lumping together phone numbers coincidentally features the same numerals in a row as the date.  You should be swelling with civic pride.  Forget how irrelevant the first three numbers have become in the era where nobody would think of calling another human: you’d certainly feel the spirit of the Buffalo if you remembered what yours is without trying to find where it’s listed on your phone.

A coincidental holiday for hometown jingoism might be fun in the same sense a randomly designated celebration like National Waffle Day can be a neat excuse to fill delicious syrup traps.  And the philanthropic impulse associated with the uniquely Buffalo event is obviously worthwhile.  But the joy of helping is ruined by the despised cheapskate owner.  Terry Pegula should send what should be tip money for him to the causes he pressures struggling fans of his teams to back.

Giving cash to local helpers is a noble notion except for one asterisk.  Unfortunately, it’s large enough to serve as the new open stadium’s roof.  The rich panhandlers who regrettably own the area’s teams have unmitigated temerity to hold a pledge drive.  Doing so after ripping off $800 million from the very victims they’re demanding pay a fortune for the right to purchase season tickets is a nice touch.  Assisting charities unprompted is preferable to being guilted into doing so by a shameless organization that demands and receives pilfered funding for normal business expenses.

The only thing worse than sticking a new venue across the street from the same remotely residential area in the direct path of lake effect snow without building a lid is making citizens pay for it.  Double payment is an indignity inflicted upon customers.  It’s seemingly impossible to only charge those who voluntarily attend games.  We could call such an arrangement the free market.

An utter lack of financial sense is a curious trait for an owner of multiple technical pro teams.  Pegula is remarkable for many dubious reasons.  Someone with a reassuring voice should explain to him that he would have even more money if he spent some.  Relinquishing precious dimes seems counterintuitive.  But the supermarket won’t make any sales unless they first invest in inventory.  Sell soup for slightly more than you paid for it and you’ll eventually profit.  If that seems too patronizing, you’re unfamiliar with how Pegula runs his teams.

Claiming we’ll come ahead on a tax hike to cover a fabulously wealthy person’s construction costs is like booking a Super Bowl trip now presuming your beloved side will be participating.  Nobody else in commerce should expect a handout.  Taxpayers aren’t ordered to fund the Wegman family when they want to sell groceries in a new neighborhood.  Unlike Pegula’s clubs, cannoli dip never disappoints.

Potential contributors are wary of supporting the general manager salary fund.  It’d be nice to get a football personnel boss who helps the most exceptional athlete with a notable receiver or two.  But the good fortune of adding Josh Allen is one more success than the NHL department has managed.  As for the model of playoff exile, they’ll be sticking with the kids’ hockey school supervisor as their general manager for a sixth season.  Kevyn Adams fittingly looks like a middle finger.

Asking for donations from those they have already charged is financially and emotionally draining.  The Pegulas are oblivious to how badly they have brutalized fans.  Sending cash to useful causes in the names of everyone who’s worn a Sabres jersey since 2011 would be the start of an apology.

Maybe donations would be easier if New Yorkers weren’t taxed into oblivion to fund things like, oh, stadiums for skinflints worth 10 figures.  Locals who cheer for having their money confiscated to keep someone who’s accumulated 7.6 freaking billion dollars from having to buy his own building can’t figure out why the area has indefinitely stagnated.  They’re the same ones who’ll be shocked when the Sabres lose eight games in a row.

Pegula has done everything he can to alienate fans.  It takes a concerted effort to make Buffalonians indifferent about hockey, but he managed a feat that’s as improbable as it is dubious.  Frittering Allen’s career while plopping a stadium across the suburban street is consistent in the wrong way.

Residents can donate without being guilted by franchises that are notoriously stingy.  Relying on Albany to funnel funds to Buffalo teams chases away residents faster than Matt Milano.  The market would grow if the fanbase weren’t paying welfare to Pegula.

Helping helpers is possible for the rest of the year.  Anyone can donate on July 17.  The PayPal button works on days after that, too.  You won’t get a gift from the Sabres.  But it’s possible to do good things without the suggestion of the worst possible organizer.

A lower percentage seized by grifting politicians would mean residents could afford, say, higher ticket prices.  Less money siphoned for our alleged good would also lower the need for assistance in the first place.  As with attendance plummeting because the product is woeful, Pegula doesn't grasp cause and effect.  This is one taxing relationship.  The owner of the team who still sends emails risibly asking if anyone wants to buy tickets unsurprisingly has a lot of nerve.

[anthonybialy]

Voting for Being Against Everything

Resistance voting is worn out.  Runners-up secretly enjoy feeling oppressed.  Fighting cruel authority is part of the Democratic ideology, which is why they never achieve anything worthwhile when they win.  The purportedly targeted imagine themselves preserving the republic by backing the one who isn’t determined to turn America into a tyrannical uniparty.  No: the other one.

Each party nominating the worst archetypes makes each other’s campaigns easy.  Inept goons don’t have to offer anything themselves as long as the alternative is dreadful.  It’s closest to clever modern candidates get.  You can pick between getting rich by printing money or charging a fee for every purchase.

You’ve hopefully started to forget an election that was going to save us from communism or fascism, depending on the yard sign.  I am sorry for the reminder.  But I only dredge up pain in order to avoid having it inflicted again.

Reconstructing the Berlin Wall with one-way doors so illegal immigrants can still welcome themselves in is how Democrats create compassion.  It’s odd that they’d want to entice foreigners to enter the Fourth Reich illegally.  I suspect they may not think ahead.

There’s no other way, claim those who reduced choices.  Many Republicans resolved to backing Trump because the sole other option was forcing the Czech Republic and Slovakia to reunite while Harris fans didn’t want the equivalent of Austria’s annexation again.

Gang members align themselves either lustily or allegedly reluctantly.  The prevailer had such an important task that they couldn’t articulate anything he would do to, say, not spend more recklessly than drunken Barack Obama.  Precedent is despised by those who keep meeting it.

Kamala was the only guardian capable of preventing New Naziland.  Adolf Trump didn’t install his fantasy during his first term just to lull resisters into a false sense of security.  The pending fascist hellhole will show up at any moment.

The other person sucks.  Do you feel inspired?  Noting the sole thing either of them got correct doesn’t create much credit just because they’re right.  I’m positive that going  all negative leads to suspected outcomes.

A bipartisan drive to assist each other by both being atrocious is inspirational in its way.  Making themselves unappealing in an unassisted manner is surely planned cooperation.  It’s not a complete indictment of participants that these were apparently the best choices, as voters only thought they were escaping blame by selecting proxies.

The problem is one was going to prevail.  That’s the thing about elections: one awful idiot gets to claim success.  It may not even be the less objectionable one if voters didn’t have breakfast that day.  Figuring out which messianic moron to choose has become a constant struggle.

Voting resolved nothing except that we shouldn’t have to choose between Chuck Lorre shows.  Each claims the other is awful, and each is right.  It’s bound to happen once as long as a similarly objectionable foe exists.

Choosing between STDs isn’t as liberating as advertised.  Selecting against rather than for created precisely the expected energy.  You got to decide how you’ll submit yet you’re still cranky.  Predictably unpleasant things keep happening when an insufficient quantity of victims learn.

There must be a different course other than noting the other person will drag us to Hell. Political parties wish dissent were stifled by an asterisk attached to the First Amendment’s tail.  They want to limit opposition for America’s sake.

Coming up with something decent sounds like a hassle.  A political philosophy based on presuming humans are smart enough to run their own affairs and spend their own money is unpopular in the era of craving an idol to crush foes.  Democrats are incapable because they always believe their messiah is elected to protect them from having to cruelly compete.  But reducing one’s own authority is as unlikely as spinning down the debt clock.

Everyone should be tired of important elections.  Freedom aficionados want a government so irrelevant that we don’t even notice who’s been elected.  Politicians should be like house cats showing their teeth: it’s an adorable meme from someone who thinks menacing viciousness is on display.  A president should hold up a jersey while hosting champion teams and aim aircraft carriers at nations who don’t similarly respect natural rights.  That’s the to-do list’s end.

Voting factions hope people never realize it’s possible to cut them off at the source.  We’re free to nominate different people altogether.  Defying the will of the machines sounds blasphemous.  But that presumes they’re not presently obeying the Devil’s will.

Not indulging people who want politics in our lives seems like a reasonable request.  That presumes free will remains an option.  Based on recent electoral trends, voters are demanding to have more of it confiscated after an initial submission at a polling place.

The people most into ordering around others are the least qualified to do so in a natural development that only surprises the subjects.  The urge to control existing in those who shouldn’t even be deciding what shape of pasta to buy is as obvious as improving the economy by getting government out of it.  Life has gotten simply particularly ironic.  Perpetrators curse at cruel fate.

If you really thought this was the most important election of our lifetimes, you would’ve nominated competent adults.  The only reason we know recent options are not casted characters is how crummy their dialogue seems.  Pain reminds us consequences are real.