attheblackdog

[attheblackdog]

Johnny: *pointing gun at a bad guy*

Price: SOAP! What was the first rule?

Johnny: Label everything in the refrigerator!

Price: No! Do not escalate!

Johnny: Rules are meant to be broken!

Price: that’s the exact opposite of what they are meant for!

Johnny: Fine! fuck!

[attheblackdog]

Why isn't "too scary" a good enough reason to never drive a car

[attheblackdog]

the pitt on twitter part 4 (pt. 8)

[attheblackdog]

The Pitt + Text Posts (03/?)

[attheblackdog]

[attheblackdog]

“Mmm, no, I think I want it moved slightly up.”

“Jesus christ, dude!” Gareth yelled from across the tattoo shop. “You’ve made Eddie move your stencil like eight times! Just fucking get the tattoo or leave already! You’re wasting everyone’s time!”

“Gareth? Shut the fuck up. Respectfully. This is going on him permanently, I don’t care if he makes me move the stencil fifty times, no shut up, I really don’t care if I gotta move it that many times as long as he ends up happy with the result. Okay, dude? You don’t get a canvas like this every day, I wouldn’t dare sully it with less than his ideal tattoo.”

“Thank you,” Steve said, “for defending my honor. And for the complement?”

“It was. Not hitting on you or anything, but you are drop dead gorgeous and you’re going to be the best advertisement for my art that I could ever dream of.”

Steve smiled and bit his lip. “What if I wanted you to be hitting on me?”

“After the tattoo is done and the cash payment is settled, then I will hit on you every moment for the rest of our lives if you want me to. But for now, let’s get this stencil size and placement right, sweetheart.”

[attheblackdog]

Rosekiller girl dads

Barty that almost only wears black and is coved in bad tattoos that he did when he was to younger.

Evan that has dozens of piercings bleach blond hair and a scary demeanor.

And their 6 year old daughter that is coverd in glitter has pink hair, fairy wings and a big puffy skirt

[attheblackdog]

down on my knees

full version on bluesky | twitter | patreon

early access + nsfw on patreon

this short comic was drawn as fanart of the fic Won't you help me (down on my knees?) by @c4tto626, which is very explicit and incredibly hot and also gave me brainworms <3 send them a kudos and a nice comment if you like the fic!

[attheblackdog]

Johnny ‘Soap’ Mactavish who is so possessive he locks his girl in chastity while he’s on deployment. That’s Johnny’s cunt and nobody gets to touch it not even his pretty little bird, not without his say so.

Johnny ‘Soap’ Mactavish who comes home and his sweet girl is immediately on him, desperate and whining..

Johnny ‘Soap’ Mactavish who can’t help teasing his girl, rubbing the back of his fingers against the metal covering her pink pussy in an imitation of what he’d do if she wasn’t covered by the belt

Johnny ‘Soap’ Mactavish who’d chuckle and coo, ‘you poor thing. It’s been so long this time, hen’ as he’d kiss your covered clit. He’d lick and bite your thighs until he removed chastity.

Johnny ‘Soap’ Mactavish who would hold his hand steady resting over your wet cunt and watch as you ground against him with your legs kicking, desperate for release after being denied for so long begging him as he laughed and refused to do more. You want to get off so bad, you do the work.

‘So wet already and i’m not even doing anything”

[attheblackdog]

Peter has mastered the skill of making the other marauders think whatever little stunt/joke they pulled was funny until his face completely drops mid-cackle

[attheblackdog]

Bob giving up control of his life to the physical embodiment of his depression and then beating himself up over it and the void just becoming more powerful as a result is such a perfect metaphor. like yeah, that's exactly how it is, you can't beat depression with self-loathing, you need support and purpose and the people you love and loves you. they pulled it off beautifully

[attheblackdog]

has anyone done this yet?

[attheblackdog]

We are Thunderbolts! // The Thunderbolts* (The New Avengers) (2025)

[attheblackdog]

[attheblackdog]

nsfw ahead but

can't stop thinking about eddie accidentally finding out steve is a bottom and i dont mean it just comes up in conversation or eddie goes snooping i mean they're making out and steve begs eddie to touch him and eddie teasing, "touch your what, stevie?" because he expects steve to snap back at him, maybe even actually bite him, but instead steve leans into and whines "my hole" and eddie blue screens so hard steve gets confused and sits back with this bitchy little stare like "what is your fucking damage munson. people don't just stop kissing me when i'm giving my best slut, you know." and then eddie's brain reboots and he flips steve over and rims him until he cries.

[attheblackdog]

I have a useless ghoap headcanon.

I love the height difference, but I always make the gap there larger. Instead of being 6'4", Ghost is now 6'6. Soap is now like 5'9" or 5'10".

And weight differences too. Ghost is a "big boy in a skull mask." And it shows. He's large, bulky, and can easily lift Soap like he's a toy doll. Maybe carry him under his arm while running hahaha.

Soap, on the other hand, is not as stocky as he is in the game. Instead, he's kind of like Gaz's shape, maybe even smaller. A tiny little Scottish boy with a fiery temper fighting to prove he belongs even if he's shorter and smaller than everyone else.

I also headcanon that Soap thinks its really really hot that Ghost can just pick him up and move him whenever he wants. Ghost thinks its really really hot that he can do so. Lol

Feel free to reblog and add your own HC!

[attheblackdog]

I actually passed away quite a few years ago, but I'm a very private person and never told anybody.