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[dvshnkr]

Origin

As darkness dawns on the thickly forested regions of Marimbu, it is almost as if a new life begins. The tall trees are quick to soak up any tarrying sunshine and surface becomes grim and ghastly. Several reptiles, mammals and bugs roam the lands while others inhabit the trees. The sound of birds in the skies above reaches them, albeit without any visual validation. Predators are lurking, their victims are keeping an eye out for them, and there is a quiescent melancholy in the air.

Somewhere along the Western borders of the forest was a tribe of apes and a few other similar monkey species. Led by an oddity of an ape who called himself King, they had embarked on a journey to discover far-away lands and to make new friends along the way. Their clan, having spent a few generations in the same part of the forest, had decided it was time for a change. Presently, they came to a stop as the night sky began to creep in and it became too difficult to proceed. They would sleep, half of them or so at a time, while the remaining kept watch. King would keep watch first and sleep later.

A couple of hours ahead of dawn, that is to say well into the second half of the night, one of the apes heard light rustles and whispers behind him. Before he had time to inspect the source of the sound, an ape slightly bigger than him pounced on him and held him down. At the same time, he saw other members of his tribe receive similar treatment. King, awoken by the action, tried to ascertain the leader of the attacking tribe so as to attempt to make peace. His jaw dropped as his eyes met an oddity much like himself as the opposing leader. “Adam,” he introduced himself gently, referring to what he went by before he assumed the name of King. “Eve,” she responded, with an equally curious awe.

[dvshnkr]

Note to self:

make space for fresh ideas and prospects

shed dead weight

upset the state of rest, cope with the change

pray for the strength

emotions are best under arrest.

[dvshnkr]

“Try to imagine a life without timekeeping. You probably can’t. You know the month, the year, the day of the week. There is a clock on your wall or the dashboard of your car. You have a schedule, a calendar, a time for dinner or a movie. Yet all around you, timekeeping is ignored. Birds are not late. A dog does not check its watch. Deer do not fret over passing birthdays. Man alone measures time. Man alone chimes the hour. And, because of this, man alone suffers a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures. A fear of time running out.”

— Mitch Albom, The Time Keeper

[dvshnkr]

when you get sick, but aren’t convinced you’re sick

i started feeling tired about 1-1.5 months before my dedicated study period started. at first i didn’t really notice. i was staying up late, getting up early (physically couldn’t make myself sleep past 8:30AM, regardless of how late i went to bed) so i didn’t really think it was weird that i started napping during the day. gradually the naps got longer and more frequent, and i couldn’t stay awake when i was trying to study (cue the constant rewinds of b&b and pathoma). it was frustrating, especially since i knew the time before my exams was growing short. despite this frustration, i still kept falling asleep suddenly and frequently throughout the day (2-3 naps a day, each nap being 1.5-2 hours long). i physically couldn’t stay awake, so i adapted the way i studied and decided to just focus on passing my classes instead of studying for step. i didn’t really think anything of it, deciding i was just getting burnt out and feeling lazy from studying all the time.

by the time i had finished my second to last exam, i knew i had to do something. i felt woefully unprepared for step because i hadn’t actually started studying for it, and by the time i was a few weeks into dedicated i talked to my parents and decided to ask for a leave of absence from my school. got it all together and made an appointment with my primary care physician and my endocrinologist.

surprise, surprise: i had high TSH levels and my endocrinologist prescribed levothyroxine to treat it. i was honestly a bit surprised to get the lab results back because i had kind of thought that what i had been feeling was (1) within my control and that (2) i was just being lazy. to actually be diagnosed with hypothyroidism left me baffled. how, when i have been studying exactly this, was i able to still miss and dismiss the signs? and even now, knowing that the tiredness that i had carried for months was not just me being lazy, is hard for me to accept.

the overall message here is to not ignore your own bodies people! i could’ve saved myself from gaining ~15lbs if i had paid attention. health is wealth and you can’t study efficiently if you’re not well!

[dvshnkr]

“While religion deals only with fancies, theorems, and beliefs, the initiates of the Ancient Mysteries go straight to the fountainhead of wisdom and, learning the will of the gods, make that will the law of their lives. The initiate does not guess, wonder or soliloquize he labors with facts for he is one with the truths of Nature.”

— Manly P. Hall

[dvshnkr]

100 Random Character Development Questions

001. When is their birthday? 002. Do they do anything to celebrate their birthday? 003. Does your character like coffee better, or tea? 004. Do they prefer being alone or with others? 005. Are they in good health? 006. What sense do they most rely on? 007. Is your character an optimist or a pessimist? 008. What is their favorite fairy tale? 009. Do they believe in happy endings? 010. Do they believe in love at first sight? 011. How would your character court the person of their dreams? 012. What makes your character embarrassed? 013. Have they ever been bullied or teased? 014. Detail one secret shame your character feels. 015. Are they most likely to fight with their fists or their tongue? 016. What is their choice of weapon? 017. When does your character think that violence is justified or deserved? 018. Your character wakes up to find that war has been declared. What do they do? 019. If they could have a superpower, what would they choose? 020. What are their hobbies? 021. How do they display affection? 022. What is the most beautiful thing they’ve ever seen? 023. What do they consider beautiful in others physically? 024. What do they consider ugly in others physically? 025. What do they consider beautiful in others personality-wise? 026. What do they consider ugly in others personality-wise? 027. What is their idea of perfect happiness? 028. What makes them laugh out loud? 029. What sort of sense of humor does your character have? 030. Do they believe in the afterlife? 031. Are they superstitious about anything? 032. Does your character believe in ghosts? 033. Do they keep their promises? 034. What’s their view of lying? 035. What is the most important rule your character lives by? 036. How honorable is your character? 037. If your character saw someone drop a large sum of money and knew that they could probably take it without anyone noticing, what would they do? 038. What bad habits do they have? 039. What do they think is the worst thing that can be done to a person? 040. What is their obsession? 041. Are they comfortable with technology? 042. What is their greatest achievement? 043. What will they stand up for? 044. What disgusts them? 045. Does your character have any chronic medical conditions? 046. How do they handle getting sick? 047. What was the last medical problem your character had? 048. Do they have any allergies? 049. How does your character feel about growing old? 050. How does your character feel about their own mortality? 051. If they knew they would die tomorrow, what would they do today? 052. What is your character’s worst flaw? 053. What is your character’s greatest strength? 054. Does your character want power or authority of any kind? 055. Is your character an introvert or an extrovert? 056. Has your character ever struck someone in anger? 057. Has your character ever killed anyone? 058. What is your character’s idea of a perfect day? 059. List several phrases your character is fond of uttering. Where did they pick them up? 060. What is your character’s attitude toward education and learning? 061. Does your character prefer adventure or safety and security? 062. What sort of legacy does your character wish to leave behind? 063. How well does your character handle difficult people? 064. In what ways does your character annoy others? 065. Is your character better at leading or following? Which do they prefer? 066. Does your character prefer city life or being out in nature? 067. Does your character believe in fate or destiny? 068. How strong is your character’s sense of responsibility? What kinds of things trigger it? 069. What about your character is heroic? 070. What about your character is cowardly? 071. How kind is your character? 072. In a Dungeons & Dragons game, which class would your character be? (wizard, fighter, bard, priest, ranger, etc.) 073. In a novel, what plot role would your character fill? (hero, anti-hero, sidekick, villain, etc.) 074. What is your character’s favorite game? 075. Is your character ticklish? 076. How do they express anger? 077. How often do they cry? Over what? 078. How emotionally stable is your character? 079. How easy is it for them to read the emotions of others? 080. How easy is it for others to read your character’s emotions? 081. Is your character religious? 082. What are your character’s sleeping preferences? 083. What is the first thing they say and/or do when they wake up? 084. Describe your character in one word. 085. Describe your character in three words. 086. How would your character describe themself in one word? 087. How would your character describe themself in three words? 088. Is your character quiet or loud? 089. How vocally expressive is your character? 090. How bodily expressive is your character? 091. What type of music does your character like? 092. What emotion does your character evoke in others? 093. What is your character’s goal in life? 094. Name three things most would not expect your character to be able to know. 095. Name three things most would not expect your character to be able to do. 096. How do they move and carry themselves? What energy do they project? 097. How well do they adapt to change? 098. Does your character like animals? 099. Do they talk to inanimate objects? 100. Does your character dream? If so, what do they dream about?

[dvshnkr]

Rick and Morty. Lost, somewhere in this universe. Or another.

[dvshnkr]

Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name; But what's puzzling you, is the nature of my game

The Rolling Stones