embodiedtales

[embodiedtales]

Why is the world still turning?

Last night I found my best friend dead in the worst circumstances. I will never forget what I saw and I’ll probably never get over it. How is everything still ticking by? How does the world keep turning on its axis?

[embodiedtales]

Friendship loss hurts like any other

[embodiedtales]

Stay

Stay.

Stay

for the ones who understand

with arms that have ached for

your shoulders. Stay for the

poets and the artists who have

the means to say it. Stay

for the ones sat beside you

in empathy. Survivors of the madness

busy getting by. Stay for the company

for the possibility of connection,

of healing conversations. Stay

because there is a you-shaped

space in the world that only

you can fill. Stay for the love

you don’t yet understand the scope of.

Stay for the ones who tell you

you matter. Stay because as the

world burns its blinding light

each morning and night

piercing the darkness sometimes

there is a chance it might get better.

Stay here to find out. Stay to

be the lighthouse. Stay to undo

the chains they locked you in.

Stay because there are skeleton keys.

And people who will share them.

Stay, okay? Just a moment longer.

You are so brave to dare to hope

when we never know what’s coming.

Stay because maybe you’re not alone

after all and the despair

may not be all there is.

Stay, okay? Our hearts need yours.

Stay.

[embodiedtales]

About that new year new you thing ...

[embodiedtales]

For those who may have experience of being labelled with BPD/EUPD

[embodiedtales]

My dad...

has died and the world will never be the same for me again.

[embodiedtales]

For anyone diagnosed with BPD/EUPD and has received bad treatment/discrimination from professionals here is a new site to collect testimonies

[embodiedtales]

No excuses not even grief

I’m recovered. I’m fat. My dad is dying. I still have to eat. I still can’t “afford” to lose weight and nor can you.

I’m watching him deteriorate, I’m watching life seep out of him and I still have to chew my food and swallow it like a machine. Even though I’m not hungry. Even though my guts are full with grief. Even though I’m fat. Even though.

No excuses.

[embodiedtales]

[embodiedtales]

I got engaged!

[embodiedtales]

[embodiedtales]

A new blog for a cancer journey

I have a new blog. I just found out my dad has stage 4 pancreatic cancer with 6-12 months to live they say. I need somewhere to process and chronicle the journey of grief and joy for this man. If you like poetry and musings on loss then please come and read

[embodiedtales]

My papa is sick

After the c word

Dropped in our laps

Like a grenade

Unnamed and unmanned

Of unknown origin

Hide and seek cells

Multiplying in tissue

On the turn

Like soured milk

I took time To thank

my organs, My skin

For holding all this in

Expanding To contain

the grief And loss of The

fantasy. That you’ll always

Be here

I know - have always known -

Of the fleeting dawns

And yet

Having taken Life

by the throat

And throttled it

Half to death

Now the guilt

Has simmered long enough

To brew a strong cup

Of shame

For throwing it away

So carelessly

[embodiedtales]

[embodiedtales]

[embodiedtales]

How my mum went from weight watchers obsessive to recovery ally

[embodiedtales]