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Merry Christmas To All My Amazing Followers and Mutuals!

This is my Christmas present to all of you wonderful, cool people I have met, interacted with, and seen come to my blog—all of whom have made the end of this year so much more enjoyable then I could have hoped for!

Sorry there isn’t anything for Jack’s egos, but if you guys like this I promise to make something JSE related soon!

(Please click for better quality)

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[Thanksgiving at the Iplier Mansion]

Y/N: So, who’s making the dinner?

Host: Host says it’s customary for the newest members to cook for the holidays. However, Y/N will find not everyone follows this rule.

*Annus comes strolling in from the kitchen with the “turkey”*

Annus: Viola! A labor of love and time, to be enjoyed just once and then never again!

*Dark pinches the bridge of his nose*

Dark: Annus, for the last time, play-doh is not a viable substance to consume. Go back to your coffin and think about what you’ve done.

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may you have a peaceful 4th deathaversary

In loving memory of Unus Annus on their 1st year anniversary since the end. Memento Mori, my old friends, till we see each other again.

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My Unus Annus Collage  ☠️🖤⏲🤍

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My Unus Annus Mood Board

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“It still haunts me, the way you left in the same way that I imagine the world will end: half-way through a promised forever, all at once.” - S.R.W.

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Chibi Yancy 🍉

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shame // bastille

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Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone! 💕

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Random Personal Ego Head Canons Part 9 (Valentine’s Day Edition)

~ Wilford dresses up like cupid and terrorizes the other egos by trying to shoot them with “love arrows”. Edward always goes into hysterics as soon as he sees this happening, chasing the pink madman down to remind him that wounding people, in fact, does *not* make them fall in love with other people it only gives the doc more work on whats supposed to be his day off.

~ Anti’s penchant for arson only increases on this day as stuff like “ooey gooey” celebrations of love fill him with “a disgust unrivaled”, as he so graciously puts it. God help the poor souls nearby if he sees anything vaguely alluding to this day of love cause the chances of him setting it ablaze is higher than the Chrysler building. All this to say, he’s totally not pissed that he doesn’t have a Valentine.

~ Yan decorates the whole manor in roses and homemade crafted hearts, stringing them up on the banisters and sprinkling petals on every floor surface until the whole manor is a frilly, fragrant sea of red and pink. All the while he’s sighing longingly, speaking even more about his senpai than usual, much to the annoyance of just about every other ego.

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[What the Ipliers would do for Y/N on Valentine’s Day if they were their valentine part 2]

~ Yancy would bring you to that Broadway show you’ve always wanted to see, his arm wrapped around you as you both watched, enraptured. The tickets were forged, of course, he’s no thousandaire, but he’d have enough to buy you a New York style hot dog after the show before you proceed to walk through Central Park, hand in hand, his thumb rubbing over yours gently.

~ Dark would take you out for a moonlit walk by the manor’s lake, setting out a blanket with wine paired with dark chocolate, berries, and cheese. He would gaze at you with a rare tenderness and tell you in a low rumble how you make the moon jealous with your shine, your otherness and glow. He’d lastly offer you immortality, an eternity by his side, if that be your choice.

~ Eric would guide you out to his favorite spot, a quiet secluded meadow, looking up at you shyly to gauge your reaction, hopeful that you liked it. You’d then both sit down, making each other flower crowns out of wild flowers. He’d timidly place a daisy chain around your neck like a necklace, blushing profusely with a small smile, trying to wordlessly convey his feelings to you.

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[What the Ipliers would do for Y/N on Valentine’s Day if they were their valentine part 1]

~ Illinois would bring you on a wild, whirlwind adventure where you would both discover a gorgeous ancient hopefully-not-cursed ruby necklace that he would then gift to you, placing it around your neck with a crooked grin. He’d then truthfully call you his greatest, most beautiful discovery and you’d watch the sunset from the jungle canopy with your head on his shoulder.

~ Wilford would take you out to a colorful nighttime carnival where you’d both play game after game, sharing cotton candy and popcorn together, huge grins on your faces. After popping enough balloons on a game, he’d win a giant plushie for you, nearly double your size. You’d end the night watching a fireworks display and he’d thank you for giving him the prize of your heart.

~ The Host would set up a picnic outside of his cabin in the woods fit with all your homemade favorites cooked to the best of his ability, though he’d admit softly an apology of him not being the best cook. After some time he’d narrate how it felt to meet you for the first time and how he feels now in your presence in soft, thoughtful, near poetic words that show how much he cares.

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[What the Septics would do for Y/N on Valentine’s Day if they were their valentine]

~ JJ would stay indoors with you, drinking tea and swaying with you to romantic songs played on his record player. He would silently laugh as you end up making a pillow fort together, pulling a blanket around you both before ending the day watching silent films, sharing a bag of popcorn mixed with candy hearts. He would later sign to you how happy and heard you make him feel.

~ Anti would take you to play lasertag, grinning at you slyly as he vows to not go easy on you before running away cackling. You’d manage to hit him quite a few times, but he hits you more, suddenly rounding a corner with hands up in mock surrender only to steal a kiss, shoot you, and quickly dart away back to safety. In the end he won the game but you say he cheated to which he makes up by saying he was just getting even since you already won much more than a game.

~ Henrik would take you out to get coffee at a cat cafe, petting and playing with the cats while talking about topics that interest you both. Afterwards he’d bring you to a drive-in movie to see a romantic comedy, eating burgers and fries and resting your head on his shoulder as he wraps an arm around you, a tad nervous but trying to remain composed. He’d call you pet names in German, refusing to translate with a grin when you ask what he said.

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Google Valentines Day headcanons??? Please, I am but a lonely man /hj

Ooooo lemme see what I can do for ya! And I understand completely, I too can be a rather lonely lonely gal at times /lh

Also, my friend @enapyen helped to come up with some of these!

~ If Google so happened to have a partner he would give them a bouquet of blue irises paired with their favorite flowers and other greenery from the manor’s garden with the help of Eric, of course, as he is the one that tends most to the gardens.

~ He auto generates poems for the other egos to give to their significant others. All he asks in return is for them to stop triggering the security alarms in the middle of the night when he’s charging cause it’s getting on his nerves.

~ Google doesn’t often get nervous or malfunction anymore, but when he tries to talk about his feelings to his Valentine it causes him to buffer a bit making him stutter and stammer over his words. If he was capable of it, he’s sure he would be sweating, though he does blush faintly blue.

~ When he gets feeling a bit nervous he starts rambling, giving random fun facts about flowers, chocolates, and other traditions around this holiday of love from different parts of world all in the means of hopefully impressing you.

~ Google has to monitor Yan the most during Valentine’s Day as more than once the lovesick ego has tried to kidnap and bring his senpai into the manor for a “surprise romantic date”. The android has to remind him that kidnapping is a felony and his senpai probably would much prefer a stuffed animal and chocolates over chloroform and rope.

~ During the year whenever he finds something that he thinks his parter would like, he’ll tend to buy and hold onto it until he can give it to them. The gifts often tend to be blue themed, especially when it comes to clothes, as that is what catches his eye most and he likes the idea of them wearing similar colors as well.

~ For all his knowledge, he often doesn’t consider the season of the year when gifting things. During the summer he has once gifted his partner a scarf and gloves, thinking they’d look great on them. And then during Valentine’s day he had given them some sunscreen and sunglasses, thinking both a practical gift and a pretty gift would be appreciated despite the fact that there was still snow outside on the manor’s lawn.

~ Google has always liked to leave little notes for his partner but they can sometimes come off a bit… vaguely creepy, threatening, or just plain odd as he is not always the best with words. He means well and attempts his best to be sweet but his experience in love and wording said love is rather limited to say the least.

So god help his poor partner reading his valentine’s day card. Hopefully they can decipher the meaning out of Google’s misquoted phrases like, “I cannot respire but you took possession of my oxygen nonetheless and that is a crime, but I forgive you and offer my harddrive in exchange for your precious cardiac organ.”

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Yancis

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‘Twas The Night Before Christmas: Iplier Egos Version

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the manor Not an ego was stirring, not even those bastards; The stockings were sealed all with magic and care, In hopes that no cryptids would end up in there; The ipliers were fastened with locks on their beds; While visions of “go to sleep” played on a loop in their heads; And lunky in his fire pit, and I in my chair, Had just settled the chaos for tomorrow’s affairs, When out in the courtyard there arose such a KABOOM, I sprang from my seat to see what could be our doom. Away to the window on my shadows I fled, Tore open the curtains, waiting to see someone dead. The moon cattywampus to the freshly magic-made snow, Gave way to a shadow, one that wasn’t my own, When what to my baffled wide eyes did then unfurl, But a honkin’ huge sleigh and eight mighty swole squirrels, With a tipsy daft driver so loony and thicc, I knew in a moment he must be our “St. Nick.” More rapid than a heehoo his fierce flyers they came, And he cursed, and he bellowed, and called them by name: “Now, Squishy! now, Acorn! now Nutso and Skippy! On, Nutters! on, Fluffsters! on, Nommer and Chippy! To the top of that manor! AHHH–don’t hit the wall! Now yeet away! yeet away! yeet away all!” As shadows that before the dawn fly, When they meet with the light, take on the sky; So up to the manor roof the furry gliders they flew With a sleigh full of septics, and our main madman too— And then, in a twinkling, I heard &, unfortunately, saw The scratching and clawing of each mud-tracking paw. As I scoffed in disgust, veins threatening to burst, Down the chimney he came, thankfully not again ass first. He was dressed all in red, from his head to his feet, And his clothes smelled so rancid–wait, is that meat?! A bundle of goodies he had lugged on his back, And he looked like a drug dealer here to sell crack. His eyes—how they dared wink! his dimples, how infernal! His cheeks were too cheeky, this once old face of a colonel! His droll wide mouth was quirked up like a bow, And the white beard on his chin was hanging too low; The bulbous point of a pipe he let hang from his lips, And the bubbles swarmed round his mustache’s tips; He had a shit eating grin and his hands on his belly That shooka shooka as he giggled, like he did on the telly, He was chummy and gleeful, a right jolly ol’ “elf,” And I smiled when I saw this, in spite of myself; Another wink of his eye and a shake of his head Soon gave me to know at least no one was dead; He spoke not a word, but went right to his work, And filled all the stockings; mine with coal–what a jerk! And laying his finger aside of his stache, And with a toodaloo, up the chimney he dashed; He skerted to his sleigh, to his critters gave an awoogah, And away they all scurried like a cucumber with a tuba. But I heard him exclaim, as he yoinked out of sight— “Happy Christmas to all, especially to Jerry’s wife!”

- Edited as such to be this way by Ria

Original poem by Clement Clarke Moore