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shnookums?

Ok so hear me out. Gollum and Isildur both call the ring “Precious,” thousands of years apart. This suggests that the Ring itself identifies this way, further implying that Sauron called it “precious” first.

Gandalf reacts to Bilbo using this name, which makes me think that calling Rings of Power by terms of endearment is, like, a thing.

SO.

What adorable/uncomfortable names do the other Rings have?? 🤣🤣🤣

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The phrase "a human adage" in Star Trek should come up with translations of idioms from other human languages; in this essay I will

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not me illustrating my own fanfic 😂

Dudley Dursley Meets Magic: Year One (40913 words) by bcubed Chapters: 41/? Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Characters: Dudley Dursley, Harry Potter, Rubeus Hagrid, Vernon Dursley, Petunia Evans Dursley, Minerva McGonagall, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom, Draco Malfoy, Gregory Goyle, Sorting Hat (Harry Potter) Additional Tags: Magical Dudley Dursley, Redemption, Cousins, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Russian Empire, Alternate Universe - Wizards, Alternate History, Alternate Universe - Magic, Music Summary: Harry was born with magic; why not his cousin? What would Vernon and Petunia have done if their son had gotten the magical gene? How would Harry and Dudley's relationship have been different? Why does Dudley get SO heavy in the books? Oh, and, what would "Harry Oblivious Potter" do if he didn't arrive at Hogwarts alone?

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Re: anxiety & conflict

In a conflict recently with someone who I’m pretty sure doesn’t deal with an anxiety disorder, it occurred to me to spread this advice as far & wide as I’m able:

Dear people who do not struggle with anxiety:

In situations of conflict with anxious folks (based on my non-comprehensive conversations with SOME but several people who struggle with anxiety), where you’re not face-to-face/responding immediately, seeing and ignoring a message can easily be construed as an attack, because it tends to make us panic. A simple “I saw your message and will respond when I can” can be the difference between functioning through the day and panicking ourselves into a fetal meltdown. Better is “I saw your message and will respond by x time/day,” and better yet is “I’m not [mad at you, offended, etc] and will get back to you by x time/day.” For those of us with anxiety AND depression, being ignored is a very quick way to fall down an “I’m not worth their time/im not worth it/im not good enough/etc” black hole, which tends to be very hard to climb out of.

We* know, logically, that this is not your fault. It’s our brains’ wiring. But it’s extremely kind of you to respond with compassion, and we tend to appreciate it!

*I don’t speak for all of us, this has just been the consensus of the people with anxiety I’ve talked with about this particular issue over the last many years.

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I had a realization

I can’t unsee it:

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Was that legal?

Dear history side,

I'm listening to Hamilton this morning. Thomas Jefferson, James Madison, and Aaron Burr come to Alexander Hamilton with check stubs from his transactions to James Reynolds.

How would one obtain something like that legally? I gotsta know if that was an illegal backhand! Cause... curious!

Also—does anyone know if Hamilton told Eliza about the affair before he published the Reynolds pamphlet?

Thanks!

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Frickin Dumbledore

Ok so some groundwork.

Some of my detail-remembering may be off.

There’s not a chance in J K’s world (see what I did there?) that other wizards haven’t been conceived with the influence of love potions (see: rape drugs,) so that is no real reason for Riddle to have become Voldy. Like, I’m sorry, but there are sociopaths contributing to society everywhere. So he can’t love. So what? He still chose to be beastly.

HOWEVER. Riddle did NOT choose all of his beastliness. He was horrified by the idea of returning to the orphanage. BEGGED to stay at Hogwarts. A little countryside orphanage in, what, the 30’s-40’s, where we KNOW kid-to-kid abuse happened, that Riddle the terror was scared to return to? Let’s face it, Tom Riddle was a severely abused child who never got counseling, on top of being a sociopath and who only ever got the comfort/attention he wanted needed out of being abusive to his peers.

But. BUT! Here’s the thing: Professor Dippet (two t’s?) didn’t see all this damage. Idk, maybe the ministry deliberately put idiots in charge at Hogwarts, or maybe he was just less involved. He very likely had no idea why Tom didn’t want to leave over the summer. (Especially, re: my PS on this post, the wizard/muggle cultural divide.)

You know who did know?

Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Screw-you-Dumbledore.

He saw it. He knew.

Dumbledore was deputy headmaster; he could have intervened on Tom’s behalf. Could have found a wizarding family or even a less-awful orphanage for him to go to. Could have CONFUNDED A FAMILY INTO BELIEVING HE WAS THEIR SON (ok a stretch but he could’ve.) Could have TAKEN TOM RIDDLE HOME WITH HIM HIMSELF, or SET HIM UP WITH A ROOM IN THE LEAKY CAULDRON, or, basically, done ANYTHING HE WANTED to spare Tom Riddle further abuse.

So why didn’t he?

Ego.

Dumbledore, for all he pretends to recognize his own need for needing “seemly modesty,” is the most egotistical butthead ever. And, in this case, he perpetuated his own abused/witnessing abuse childhood (idk if it’s *exactly* canon but are you suggesting Albus, Aberforth, and Ariana we’re abused? Nvm that’s a different rant.) to hundreds or thousands of kids at Hogwarts.

Kids including Tom Riddle.

Dumbledore refers to Voldy as if he were destined to be evil. As if no one could have prevented it. Some unstoppable tragedy. But—HE could have. Dumbledore. He could have invested in Tom Riddle, preventing the rise of Voldemort and, what, MILLIONS of deaths? He was perfectly poised to do so—he had access. Intelligence. Influence. Funds. But because of his “I-survived-abuse, clever-people-survive” style ego, Dumbledore failed. He FAILED Riddle and, in so doing, all of England.

And you know the worst part? Literally the only thing he learned was to be sneakier. So when a young Mr. Potter was being abused? Dumbledore burrowed deeper into his secrets and lies and kept doing what he had always done.

P. S. My bestie would like me to remember that Tom Riddle was sent back to an orphanage in LONDON during the LONDON BLITZ that poor broken child.

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Cleaning ADHD style

This one goes out to my fellow ADHD sufferers who suck at cleaning—

My to-do lists and schedules have always followed what I imagine is a neurotypical person’s structure:

20 minutes: clear kitchen counters 10 minutes: scrub kitchen counters 15 minutes: sweep kitchen floor 15 minutes: mop kitchen floor

Etc.

I break it down into tiny chunks, which helps, but I still get frustrated because my brain is nine steps away from the task at hand.

I can’t believe this took 29 years, but today I deliberately did an experiment and it’s working surprisingly well. I made a list (so I remember stuff) and then my last, quite productive hour and a half, has been more like:

-2 minutes clearing counters -2 minutes sweep 10 ft of floor -vacuum 1 rug -sit 1.5 minutes -Read picture book to kids -clear 1/2 table -scrub one counter Etc.

It’s not perfect. But my “clean radius” is slowly growing wider. (And if I didn’t have to stop every third second for the bathroom, that would help, but 🤷🏻‍♀️pregnancy.)

Anyway. Might be worth a shot.

P.S. I didn’t schedule it out like that. Just puttering in a loop with micro-breaks in between.

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Important Question:

Superman vs. lightsaber. Discuss.

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…WHY did Sam Gamgee walk halfway into some rando’s field the first time, though?

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Did “is it cake?” Type artists come first, or did Peeta Melark?

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Saltines with no salt are 1000x worse than chocolate chip cookies with no chocolate chips I will die on this hill

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in “Aladdin” (1992,) Jafar could easily have murdered the Sultan. Jasmine was not allowed to inherit on her own (ok that’s an assumption, but c’mon) and as Grand Vizier, it’s likely that Jafar would have gotten the throne and could have forced Jasmine to marry him after for extra legitimacy. Like, yes, Jafar is SKEEZY, but he must have had at least SOME morality in that he didn’t kill the old man. In this essay I will

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The other night I dreamed about a society of proper, Britishy cucumbers. Which is weird enough. But they considered pickles to be their “weird cowboy cousins” and the pickles just leaned into it and wore cowboy hats and rode around on crackers.

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Just over here wondering how weird Ariel thought bathing was when she got to land.

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I don’t actually believe this, BUT. Imagine if the things you’re good at for no reason are actually because you in another timeline worked really, really hard at it.

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Grief is like art.

Everyone feels grief sometimes. Everyone creates art

Of some kind

At some times.

Some art is big, and some is small.

Some is profound to all that witness it,

And some is only significant to the artist.

My grief, like some art,

Is apparently forbidden.

Shouted down

By loud voices.

But it is real nonetheless.

Some people don’t think I get to call my sorrows real,

Because theirs are different;

Like people who say that only paint

Or violin music

Or the works of the famed

Can be termed “art.”

Because their art is large

Or brightly colored

Or obvious

And mine is old and small and crumpled at the corner.

But I have found

That there is a truth in art;

A truth in grief.

I have found

That all people are artists of some kind,

Whether in word

Or music

Or light

Or dance

Or paint

Or crayon.

I have found

That all people grieve.

At something said,

Or heard,

Something dazzling

Or moving

Something age-old

Or some new tragedy.

And in a way,

Our grief unites us.

In the same way art can;

We can all gather

And mourn,

Just as we can all gather

And appreciate.

But sadly, more often,

Our grief divides us.

“You do not know grief,”

One artist cries out.

“Your art is not my art,

“Your experience not my experience,

“And therefore

Your art, your grief, is invalid.”

But it is not so.

Or rather,

It does not need to be so.

Why cannot a beautiful photograph hang on the wall

Next to a sketch on the left

And a poem on the right?

Why cannot we acknowledge

That all art is significant

Because it exists,

Because it speaks to at least

One human heart?

Why does my pain,

My heart,

Matter less than yours?

My medium is different.

This is true.

But my soul,

Like your soul,

Is the soul of an artist.