moaelizabeth

[moaelizabeth]

Banana and dog.

The last thing you ate + the first thing you see when you look to your left is the title of your pretentious lifestyle blog.

Right now, mine would be called Pizza and Prints.

[moaelizabeth]

I LÖÖV COWS! 

Cows sitting like dogs. That is all. Please enjoy.

via @sadanduseless

[moaelizabeth]

In case anyone ever wondered what happens when you cross a bulldog with an Australian shepherd.

This is 60+ pounds of lunkhead. He got a most unfortunate mix of bulldog IQ, aussie energy, and bulldog facial structure.

He’s adorable, we love him, and this mix was a terrible idea. Bees going to be really hard to place because he’s so large, strong, energetic and incredibly stupid.

He only looks calm in the photos because we sedated him to look in his ears.

[moaelizabeth]

Sweden is cutting down on healthcare in general and maternityfacilitys in rural areas are being closed at a high rate. Some people are being forced to drive up too 350 km on small, icy roads and there are courses in how to deliver in the car.  

[moaelizabeth]

are you vegan for ethical/animal rights reasons, environmental reasons, or something else?

I’m vegan to annoy people

[moaelizabeth]

Which is more natural?

[moaelizabeth]

How do I sign up?

Anyone looking for a new job?

[moaelizabeth]

Humans are adorable.

Supporting evidence:

1. Humans say ‘ow’, even if they haven’t actually been hurt. It’s just a thing they say when they think they might have been hurt, but aren’t sure yet.

2. Humans collect shiny things and decorate their bodies and nests with them. The shinier the better, although each individual has a unique taste for style and colouring

3. Humans are not an aquatic or even amphibious species, but they flock to bodies of water simply to play in it. They can’t even hold their breath all that long; they just love to splash!

4. When night falls and the sky goes dark, humans become drowsy and begin to cocoon themselves in soft, fluffy bedding.

5. Some humans spend time in each other’s nests! Just for fun! It’s not their nest; they’re just visiting each other.

6. Some humans use pigments and dyes to make their bodies flashy and colourful! They even attach shiny dangly bits to their cartalidgous membranes!

7. Humans are very clever, and sometimes adopt creatures from other species into their family units. They don’t seem to notice the obvious differences, and often raise them alongside their own young!

8. If a human sees another creature in distress, they can commonly be observed trying to help! Even at their own risk, most humans are deeply compassionate creatures!

9. If a human hears a particularity catchy sound or tune, it will often mimic it, even to the point of annoying themselves!

10. Sneezes are entirely involuntary, and completely adorable. Especially when the human in question becomes frustrated

11. Humans love treats!!! Some more than others. Many humans will save these treats specifically for a later date when they are in need of comfort or reassurance. IE, pickles, pop tarts, Popsicles, etc

12. They’re learning to travel in space!!! They can’t get very far, but they’re trying!!! So far, they’ve made it to the end of their yard, and have found rocks

[moaelizabeth]

The Skittles Question

Any Islamophobic, Racist Shitbag/Donald Trump Jr: "If I gave you a bowl of skittles and three of them were poison would you still eat them?"

Eli Bosnick: "Are the other skittles human lives?"

Any Islamophobic, Racist Shitbag/Donald Trump Jr: "What?"

Eli Bosnick: "Like. Is there a good chance. A really good chance. I would be saving someone from a war zone and probably their life if I ate a skittle?"

Any Islamophobic, Racist Shitbag/Donald Trump Jr: "Well sure. But the point-"

Eli Bosnick: "I would eat the skittles."

Any Islamophobic, Racist Shitbag/Donald Trump Jr: "Ok-well the point is-"

Eli Bosnick: "I would GORGE myself on skittles. I would eat every single fucking skittle I could find. I would STUFF myself with skittles. And when I found the poison skittle and died I would make sure to leave behind a legacy of children and of friends who also ate skittle after skittle until there were no skittles to be eaten. And each person who found the poison skittle we would weep for. We would weep for their loss, for their sacrifice, and for the fact that they did not let themselves succumb to fear but made the world a better place by eating skittles.

Because your REAL question...the one you hid behind a shitty little inaccurate, insensitive, dehumanizing racist little candy metaphor is, IS MY LIFE MORE IMPORTANT THAN THOUSANDS UPON THOUSANDS OF MEN, WOMEN, AND TERRIFIED CHILDREN...

... and what kind of monster would think the answer to that question... is yes?"

[moaelizabeth]

A spell to repel unsolicited opinions

Repeat the phrase “Did I fucking ask you?” until the subject realizes that you, in fact, did not fucking ask them

[moaelizabeth]

now this is my kind of content

[moaelizabeth]

This is the most accurate thing I have ever seen.

[moaelizabeth]

Why do people even feel the need to make fun of triggers? Even IF most triggers where fake there is no way to know which ones are. 

Like, is it REALLY worth giving someone a panic attack over a joke that wasn’t even slightly funny to begin with? 

The real irony of the people who make jokes about being triggered is that they tend to idolize the military/veterans as if combat related PTSD isn’t a real thing that also has triggers. Y’all make fun of the people you call hero’s when you’re making fun of the teenagers with PTSD from non-combat related issues, you can’t separate the two.

[moaelizabeth]

[moaelizabeth]

Also, cows only lactate after they have had a calf so if people stopped inseminating them at every possible chance we get the cows would not need milking. 

Milk sales are down, so obviously propaganda from the dairy industry goes up!

I’ll stick with my vegan “drink,” thanks.

[moaelizabeth]

reblog to add +10 haunting power to your ghost when you die