moutainrusing - Tumblr blog

[moutainrusing]

Remus: *teasing Sirius, probably about his hair*

Sirius, curled up on Remus’ lap: I hate you.

Remus: So if this is how you treat people you hate, then how do you treat people you love?

Peter, drawing on a sleeping James’ face: Like how he treats Snape.

James, suddenly jumping awake to look at Sirius: YOU LOVE SNAPE?! BETRAYAL! HOW COULD YOU, YOU BACKSTABBING TRAITOR—

[moutainrusing]

hotter than ice

Minerva had a new assistant. And he was causing Sirius to drool. Which in turn caused James to shove him, and for the first time since he was three, Sirius almost slipped and fell on the ice.

“Whatchu looking at?”

“Pretty boy,” Sirius responded dumbly, head lolling in the direction of Minnie’s assistant.

James laughed. “Such a simp, Sirius.”

“Ayo, Sirius is being a simp?” Gideon skid up to them.

“Ha, what’s new?” His twin brother, Fabian added, skidding into them.

Gideon shoved him, and Fabian flailed around to regain his balance. “Is it Minnie’s new assistant?” He asked Sirius.

Fabian pulled a face. “He’s… not your best, Sirius.”

Sirius scowled. “He’s hot.”

Gideon cackled. “Yeah, right, only thing he’s hotter than is…”

“The ice I’m standing on!” Fabian finished, and they both skated away laughing to themselves.

James pat Sirius’s shoulder consolingly. “It’s okay, Sirius. Remember, they don’t understand true beauty. They’re always saying my hair’s a mess!”

Sirius looked at the bird’s nest of knotty dark brown mess atop of his best mate’s head with a raised brow. “I think that’s the one thing they’re right about.”

“Oi, I was defending you.”

“Mhm…” Sirius went back to looking at the new assistant. “There’s nothing to defend. He’s so hot that no one can argue against it. Gid and Fab can try, but you can’t deny that lovely hair…”

James frowned. “I’m prettier sure my hair’s neater than that.”

“Yes, but he’s not obnoxiously running a hand through it all the time. He just lets it exist, like, he doesn’t even care who sees him looking like that, he’s not even trying to impress anyone, he just does it anyway, so effortless—”

“Aight, that’s enough, if you don’t shut up I’ll leave you like the twins did.”

“As if you don’t talk about Lily way more,” Sirius grumbled.

“And every time I do, you leave me two seconds into my rant,” James reasoned.

Sirius paused. “You make a good point.”

James batted his eyelashes, “Don’t I always?”

Sirius shoved him, and James wobbled, clinging to Sirius for balance. They proceeded to scuffle, and eventually every teammate on the rink was involved; Fabian, Gideon, Marlene, and the goaltender, Emmeline. Even their hockey sticks were involved, skidding by their sides as they laughed and headlocked each other.

“Attention, team,” Minerva called in her clear, commanding voice, emphasising every syllable. “Enough messing around, time to work.” She gestured to the boy beside her, and Sirius immediately stood a little straighter. “This is Remus. He’ll be assisting me in coaching.”

“Hiya,” Remus waved, and went back to writing something in the notepad in front of him. His light brown hair fell into his honey-coloured eyes, and Sirius indulged himself in staring.

Although he couldn’t for long, because Minerva nudged Remus exasperatedly, muttering, “Lupin, introduce yourself properly.”

Remus smiled at her, awkwardly and apologetically, looking back at the team. “Uh… I want to be a coach?”

Minerva shook her head fondly. She addressed the team, “I’m certain you’ll like him. I have to go sort something out, so I’ll leave you in his capable hands, okay?”

She walked off to the office, leaving Remus blinking. “So, what do you usually do?”

Fabian raised a brow, “Are you sure you’re capable?”

Remus smirked at him. “Minerva was the one to say that, Fabian.”

Gideon’s jaw dropped. “How did you know his name? And how did you tell us apart?!”

Remus shrugged. “I’m observant.” He then grinned at Sirius. “Tell me what you want to do.”

“You,” Sirius immediately responded. Thinking fast, “Need to get those cones behind you.”

Remus raised a brow, turning to retrieve said cones.

Meanwhile, Sirius slumped into James. “I’m doomed,” he muttered.

James laughed, patting his head fondly. “I’ll be doomed with you, don’t worry.”

The next day, Sirius had an action plan. After the practice session, he skated up to Remus. “So, why’d you wanna be a coach?”

Remus smiled teasingly, “Are you asking that ‘cause you don’t think I’d be fit for the job?”

“No, I think you’d be fit for anything,” Sirius replied solemnly.

Remus laughed. It was everything. “I like training people. And I like ice.”

“I want to see you on the ice.”

“Now? The rink’s closing.”

“Tomorrow.”

“We don’t have a session tomorrow.”

“The rink’s still open for the public, isn’t it?”

Remus’s lips twitched upwards. “So it is.” And then he smiled, “Yeah, I’ll go to the rink with you, Sirius.”

Sirius had to restrain himself from dancing in excitement. “Uh, I’ll give you my number, for details, or in case you need to raincheck.”

Remus passed his phone, and while Sirius carefully typed in the correct numbers, double-checking and triple-checking because he would cry if he gave Remus the wrong number, Remus hummed, “I hope I won’t need to raincheck.”

Sirius blushed, and passed the phone back, quickly making his exit to the changing rooms. “Text me,” he shouted, before running into the changing rooms and dashing over to James, passing on the adrenaline as they both shook each other violently.

James grinned, “WHOO! HE SAID YES!”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

birthday

Remus wouldn’t tell his dormmates his birthday. Every time the other first years asked him, he’d shut them down, claiming, “It doesn’t matter.”

So James, Sirius, and Peter were on a mission.

Every day, they’d yell, “Happy birthday, Remus!” and give the boy a gift.

He’d look at them with a mixture of confusion and irritation, respond, “It’s not my birthday,” and try to give the present back.

“Nuh uh,” Sirius would grin. “We paid good money for that, don’t waste it.”

And after a few days of the same thing, with no other solution available, Remus gave in. “March tenth. It’s March tenth. Now stop giving me presents and saying happy birthday.”

James whooped victoriously, dancing around the dorm singing, “March tenth, March tenth, March tenth!”

Peter drummed his fingers on the desk in tune, and grinned, “What about on March tenth?”

Sirius took it upon himself to reply in place of Remus, who was probably going to say something ridiculous like, ‘Don’t give me presents or say happy birthday to me on my birthday.’

“We’ll just have to make an exception for the very important day that is Remus’s birthday, won’t we? Oh, and Christmas. We have to give him presents on Christmas.”

“And say happy birthday to him as well?” Peter frowned in confusion.

Remus looked at him with a dry expression, and deadpanned, “Yes. I’d like to steal Jesus’s birthday.”

“Who’s Jesus?” James interjected, pausing his dance.

Remus rolled his eyes.

Come Christmas, he was at first surprised and then very annoyed by the tiresome trio jumping on his bed, not to say ‘Merry Christmas’ like normal people, but to yell, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

<3

look! there's a book!

lmk if you want the tags removed, and don't feel like you have to do this :)

@porsiesdemadrugada @madame-midnight @mentallyillandgae @moonoceanlovie + anyone who sees this and wants to join <3

tag game idea! :) go to pinterest, type «___ aesthetic» with your city/country, eye color, favorite color and name. put in image that comes up and tag friends! (you not have to say city/country and name for privacy obviously, or use online name)

@loserhoneyy @worldsbiggestnerd101 @1nternet-ang3l @starberrymothh @arrxw81194 @eternallyajanedoe

[moutainrusing]

shapeshifter

In continuation of their buccaneering adventures, the Marauders were sailing to Grimmauld island. It was said to be inhabited by a shape-shifting seabeast, who, similar to sirens, lured sailors to their deaths with its inescapable beauty. But the Shapeshifter of Grimmauld was a bit different.

Apparently, it could transform into the person you adored the most, if there was a person like that for you. It would swoop down upon you, with the voice, face and body of your deepest desires, tell you that it’ll give you everything you want, pulling you closer, closer… before killing you.

But the Marauders wanted to be the brave heroes who sailed past Grimmauld island and lived to tell the tale. They wanted to see the shape-shifter and resist its charms. But according to Lily, they just wanted fame like the arrogant toe-rags they were.

“Not you, though, Remus,” she had smiled at him. “You’re the selfless one who makes sure none of your idiots end up dead.”

Remus had just smiled, unsure of what to say. Maybe a thank you? Or, what a lie? He always thought he was really selfish, clinging to good people who he didn’t deserve. And since when were the idiots his? But he just smiled, and followed his friends onto the ship as they sailed away, promising to return soon.

Now, Grimmauld was in sight, and they all stood at the bow of the boat, ready to face the demon.

“We are ready, boys,” James began in reassurance, raising his sword. “We know how to defeat it.”

“Aye,” Sirius agreed. “We simply remember that it isn’t the real person.”

“And it’s four of us against one,” Peter added, psyching himself up.

Sirius grinned. “Thick as thieves, right?”

“Aye!” James cheered. He turned to Remus, “Whaddya say, Remy boy?”

Remus smiled. He echoed, “Aye,” even though his chest hurt, because he never felt like he was as close to them as they were to each other. He was always the hindrance, the odd one out, the loser they took pity on.

And he was proving himself different even now, because while the trio were determinedly gazing ahead, he felt drawn to the port side of the boat, trailing over, sword limp in his hand as he peered over the edge at the rippling surface of dark blue water. And in the reflection, he saw a bird-like creature descending gracefully towards him, glowing ethereally.

The shapeshifter. He blinked. He shouldn’t have known that. Usually, upon seeing a siren, observers were immediately entranced, unable to comprehend reality. But he had realised he was being entranced, which meant that he wasn’t fully under the curse. He figured it was because he was only seeing its reflection. He smiled slightly. He could defeat it, this way, as long as he only looked at the reflection.

But before he could raise his sword in the correct direction based on the mirror, he stopped. Because the shape-shifter had decided to give itself silky black hair, which flowed to its shoulders, and sparkling grey eyes which contrasted its olive brown skin, and a wide, mischievous smirk which displayed its slightly crooked front tooth… The shape-shifter had morphed into Sirius. And wasn’t that the worst? He was apparently in love with the brave, loud, carelessly thoughtful man who only spoke to him out of pity. They weren’t even proper friends, and now Remus was here forcing his love onto someone who didn’t see him as a person. Brilliant. The worst.

He could feel the siren above him now, having allowed it to get even closer due to his horror at its form. But he adamantly glued his eyes to the water. He wasn’t exactly sure how he was resisting it, but he was immensely thankful for the ability. He slashed his sword at it, in a terribly aimless manner, but in his defence, he was basing his movements on a mirror, which meant if something was on the left it was actually the right and it was bloody confusing.

Then the others realised its presence, and rushed to his aid, yelling, roaring, brandishing their own swords, causing the siren to turn on them, trying to shape-shift into their greatest desires. Remus turned around as the siren, in confusion, attempted to transform into a hybrid version of multiple people mushed together quite unappealingly. It had Lily’s vivid red hair, courtesy of James’s undying love, mixed with strands of Sirius’s black, courtesy of Remus. But what surprised Remus the most was the scar on its left cheek, identical to his.

He shrugged; it was simply confused. Ignoring the sinking feeling of his friends knowing that his greatest desire was Sirius, and that after this, they’d never fight together again, he threw himself into their last battle. Four against one powerful, destructive demon? They couldn’t lose. Their swords slashed in sync, Peter using his short stature to slip unnoticed around the siren, while James, Sirius and Remus fought with all their might.

Remus observed a way to direct the creature towards Peter, where he had set up the perfect cage to capture it. Slowly, carefully, he manoeuvred the roaring, screeching, flailing beast towards the cage, where Peter quickly slammed it shut. And once the beast was trapped, it was no longer able to attack or defend itself. Together, James and Sirius delivered the final blow, and it evaporated, up into the clouds where it had originated.

They all heaved in relief, pride blooming across their grins. Not Remus’s though, as he tried to leave the scene unnoticed. But then he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Hi,” Sirius smiled softly, pulling Remus into the group hug. They all piled onto each other, forcing Remus to be a part of it.

James looked at them all fiercely, as if daring them to challenge him. “I love all of you. We defeated the Shapeshifter of Grimmauld together. Because we are the Marauders, and we need all four of us.”

Peter cheered.

“Too right,” Sirius grinned, directing an intense gaze at Remus. “We need even you, Remus. Especially you.”

Remus swallowed. “I love you all too.” And he’d admitted it, and now they were going to reject him, but now Sirius was in his face, in his space, and—

“But you love me in a different way, right?” Sirius whispered. “I saw the siren’s form for you. Right? It was me. Its form for me would’ve been you, I think. It had your scar on its cheek,” Sirius trailed his fingers over said scar, and Remus leaned into the touch. “It would’ve been Lily for James, and probably a normal siren for Peter, ‘cause he doesn’t feel that type of desire for people. But you for me. Me for you.”

Sirius held Remus’s gaze. He looked vulnerable, even though he’d literally seen confirmation of Remus’s love served to him on a silver platter. So to bring back the self-assured, lively, funny Sirius, Remus did something he’d never done before. With confidence, with volume, with certainty, he replied, “Aye.”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

thematics

In literally every ride at the Hogwarts Theme Park, Remus fell asleep. Even in the fastest roller coasters, the tallest drop towers, the soaking water rides… nothing. He peacefully kept his eyes closed, and Sirius kept having to shake him whenever they had to get out. He, James, Peter: all screaming their lungs out. But Remus? His lungs had never been more at rest.

It was infuriating. Sirius was pissed because how could he be more scared than Remus, and was Remus really not enjoying the trip? Was it so boring for him that he was falling asleep at every opportunity?

He decided to make things more interesting. Instead of obsessively following the map as James and Peter were doing, he plucked it from their hands, chucked it in the nearest bin, grabbed their wrists, and sprinted in whatever direction available, giving James enough time to grab the dazed Remus, who was utterly out of it. They hurtled down cobbled paths, laughing hysterically as the four of them barged into pissed off strangers, but really? They should expect reckless teens causing trouble. It was a theme park, after all.

He paused at an ice cream stall, where he threw more than enough money needed at the workers, before dragging them into the cart, and making the most obnoxious flavour combinations known to human.

“Oi!” The workers yelled, while Sirius took over, scooping a glob of mango onto a cone which was already piled high with mint chocolate and pistachio. Exotic. James stared at him incredulously, apologised to the workers, before digging right in. And Peter kept apologising to the workers, while Remus blinked dopily.

“Here,” Sirius shoved the ice cream into his face, and Remus took it with a frown.

“I don’t—”

And Sirius proceeded to shove it right onto Remus’s goody-good face. Which in turn made Remus go from goody-good to trouble-making when he scooped up a massive glob of vanilla ice cream and smeared it over Sirius’s hair.

“Aw, man, wish my hair had taste buds,” Sirius whined, winking at Remus. He then made a normal-sized ice cream (chocolate, Remus’s favourite), and rapidly manoeuvred them to the Gryffindor drop tower. Only the bravest souls dared to go on, because it was dangerous, fast, and incredibly tall.

“Sit down boys!” Sirius commanded.

“This’ll make me sick,” Peter grumbled, sitting down anyway.

James laughed. “You didn’t even eat any ice cream!”

“Trying to reduce my chances,” Peter sighed. “But all that running…”

“Mate, you loved it, and you’re gonna love this,” Sirius declared, pulling Remus to sit and passing him the cone. “Dare you to eat this while on the ride.”

Remus raised a brow, took the cone, and took Sirius up on the dare. And he ate like he was on perfectly level ground. “MATE, WHAT THE FUCK?!” He yelled, while the ride did funny things to his stomach.

Remus merely smirked, saying, “I find rides rather relaxing. It’s always easier to eat or sleep on them.”

James screamed, “AHHH GO REMUS OH MY GOD MY BELLY HELP!”

Peter simply kept screaming, giving Remus a shaky thumbs up before clinging to Sirius for dear life. Sirius gritted his teeth and tried to understand how this ride could possibly be comforting.

“Want a bite?” Remus waved the cone in his face.

Sirius glared, defiantly taking a bite of the cone and crunching it loudly in Remus’s ear.

“Alright, next ride!” He announced, jumping off his seat as soon as they hit the ground.

“‘M gonna puke…” Peter mumbled.

“Nah, you’re not,” James grinned, lifting Peter up and placing him on Sirius’s shoulders. He smirked, “Where d’you wanna run next, Sirius?”

Sirius glared, hiking Peter up his back, and continuing his run. Admittedly, it was less fast. In fact, Remus and James merely strode beside him, hand-in-hand because Remus had somehow reached a record-breaking level of calm from the record-breaking levels of speed that was the Gryffindor drop tower, in a meditative state of mind, completely directionless and oblivious, requiring James to pull him along.

“Oh, this is nice,” Peter sighed. “Thanks, James.”

“Oi, I’m the one carrying you.”

“…Thanks, Sirius.”

“That wasn’t very sincere.”

“You’re the one trying to kill us!”

Sirius grumbled. “Remus could never be killed.”

James laughed, “Oh, so you’re trying to kill Remus? I think you’ll die first, mate.”

Sirius glared, dumping Peter onto James and pointing at the Ravenclaw roller coaster. “We’re getting on.”

“Oh God,” Peter grimaced, mumbling words of encouragement to himself as they got into the lift, which sent them to the highest point of the mountain, where the roller coaster’s journey would begin.

James joined in with the encouragement, loudly and mockingly, “YES, PETE! YOU CAN DO IT! MAMA WILL BE PROUD! REMEMBER, IT’S OKAY IF YOU PISS YOURSELF!”

Peter glared at him. “The mountain is literally as high as the highest height ravens and eagles and all sorts of stupid clever birds live! And the ride goes all over the place! I’m gonna die!”

Sirius snorted, “Stupid clever birds.”

“Yes.” Peter said decisively.

“For that, I think you need to get on,” Sirius gestured to the seats.

“Alright, I’m holding Remus’s hand,” Peter grabbed Remus and pulled him in next to him.

Sirius frowned, and James cackled. “Aw, jealous, are we?”

“No, I just really want to get to Remus.”

James grinned. “I have an idea.” They slid into the seats behind, but as soon as the ride began, instead of purely yelling, James began scream-singing, “OHHH I WISH IT COULD BE CHRISTMAS—”

“JAMES, IT’S NOT—” Sirius began.

“EVERY DAY!” James screamed into Sirius’s ear.

Sirius rolled his eyes, and joined in at full volume. “WHEN THE KIDS START SINGING AND THE BAND BEGINS TO PLAYYYY!”

“REMUS, JOIN THE FUCK IN!” James leaned forward, yelling into Remus’s ear.

Remus rolled his eyes, before muttering in a deadpan, “I wish it could be Christmas every day.” Apparently, this calmed Peter down, and they proceeded to both enjoy the ride serenely. Sirius was gobsmacked. So now Remus’s composure was contagious?!

Although James decided that screeching Christmas songs was the best way to go about surviving a roller coaster, so he carried on scream-singing, forcing Sirius to sing too. Sirius says forcing. But he wasn’t really forced.

This time, when the ride finished, he grabbed Remus’s hand, and raced to the Gringotts vaults. This ride was bound to break Remus. It involved a cart lurching and jouncing and zigzagging abruptly through a maze of endlessly twisting passages, dark and gloomy and musty. And decidedly not affecting Remus in the slightest.

Sirius felt himself go green in the face, and in an attempt to stop Remus falling asleep, he pointed a finger at the stalactites and stalagmites growing from the ceiling and floor around them. “Urgh… wha’s the differ…ugh?”

Remus mused thoughtfully, “Stalactites grow from the ceiling, and stalagmites from the ground. I find an easy way to remember this is that the ‘g’ in stalagmite stands for ground, and as stalactite doesn’t have a ‘g’, it doesn’t grow from the ground.”

Peter, who was somehow managing to hold onto his tranquillity, nodded agreeably, while James cut off his screaming to look at Remus attentively. “That’s actually clever,” he noted.

“WHAT?!” Sirius yelled. So now James had also caught Remus’s composure?

“Um,” he mumbled, stumbling off the cart once it stopped. “Next ride…”

James looked at him in amusement. “Need a break?”

“No!” Sirius denied vehemently. “Onwards!” He cried, marching toward the Shrieking Shack, the haunted house. Maybe he could scare Remus.

Although as soon as the ride began, they all burst out laughing. Since when were giant spiders with too-big eyes scary?! They were embarrassments, that’s what they were. Furry and awkward, with too many gangly limbs. And since when were clowns with too-long tongues, and ugly, lumpy trolls, and adorable old werewolves scary?! Even when the ride finished, none of them could stop laughing.

“That was awesome,” Remus said, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. And Sirius grinned, because part of his mission was to at least make Remus enjoy the rides.

He decided to find another supposedly ‘scary’ ride: how about the Slytherin dungeons? They clambered into a cart, which sent them hurtling speedily through a glowing green tunnel, the spooky sound of ghosts filling their ears. Sirius mockingly imitated the wails, which sent them into fits of laughter.

“I am the ghoOoOOohhhhst of SalazaRrrrRRr,” he drawled.

“I am the fOoooOOuUnderRRrr of this ride,” James added.

“And now I haAAauuUUnt it,” Peter continued.

“FOoOOOReVeRRr!” Remus finished, looking at them all like they were entirely composed of idiocy.

Sirius was so lost in grinning stupidly at Remus that he didn’t realise they’d entered the Giant Squid passage. The green glow faded into a darker, mossy green, as the slimy, rubber tentacles of the squid swept across their faces. Sirius screamed, and because they all laughed at him, he grabbed the dangling tentacles and flung them at his friends, who echoed his screams as they were doused in slime. He laughed triumphantly, and when Remus shot him the middle finger, he’d never felt more accomplished.

The ride ended as they were splashed with buckets of green-tinted water from the squid’s lake, washing away the tentacle slime and leaving them damp, but weirdly happy. He saluted Salazar as they walked away, trailing water in their wake. “Thank you, Salazar, founder of my soggy socks!”

They laughed, all running in the same direction, the Hufflepuff ferris wheel. Yes, it wasn’t fast, but it was warm, and would heat them up with the smoke machines attached to the wheel’s centre, which released sweet, candy-smelling wafts of steam at each open carriage.

However, the ferris wheel only consisted of two-seaters, which meant that for the duration of the ride, the inseparable, thick-as-thieves group of four would have to… split up. The thought was torturous. But then Sirius had an idea. He knew how to break Remus. And on the most easy-going ride as well.

He pulled Remus onto a carriage, while James and Peter took the next one, smirking and raising brows at him. Remus simply sat back contentedly, ready to close his eyes, but Sirius shook him, and began pointing at all the sights as they rose into the air.

“Look, the ice cream stall! Oh, those workers are still trying to fix our mess.” Sirius shook his head at them in disappointment.

Remus grinned, and Sirius’s stomach flipped, even though this ride was supposed to be the slowest. He pointed, “Gryffindor tower, where I ate the poisonous concoction you dumped on me.”

“Oi, I gave you your favourite!”

“Yeah,” Remus smiled, softer, and Sirius’s stomach flipped again, on the safest ride. “Thank you.”

They were reaching the top. “Look,” Sirius pointed at Remus’s face. “The prettiest face I’ve seen.”

Remus’s eyes widened. Sirius smirked and leaned forward. “I’m going to kiss you.” Remus didn’t move back. He almost didn’t move at all, except for the slight nod of his head. So at the highest point of the ferris wheel, Sirius closed the gap between their lips. It was just a short press, yet Remus looked like his heart had jumped out of his chest. In all honesty, so had Sirius’s.

He leaned back to catch his breath on the slowest ride of all time, and instead of sleeping, Remus was panicked, lively, on the verge of screaming. And Sirius whispered in Remus’s ear, “Scream with me?”

So on the slowest, safest, most relaxing ride in the world, Remus, who was normally relaxed on the fastest rides in the world, screamed his lungs out, and Sirius followed suit.

“AHHHHHHH!” All the way until the ride stopped.

“I think I just died,” Remus mumbled, collapsing into Sirius.

Although, like James said, it was impossible to break Remus without breaking first, and so Sirius was also dead. He brought his lips to Remus’s, and kissed him again. And they didn’t need to stop for air, because they were so, so dead. Although, eventually, they did have to stop, and Sirius assumed the kiss had revived each of them. Kisses did that.

“Alright, enough,” James said, clapping them on the back and pulling them apart.

Sirius frowned at him.

Peter grimaced. “We’ve been banned from the park.”

“For kissing?!” Sirius asked in outrage.

Remus rolled his eyes, and as they were forced to exit the gates, began listing every single rule they’d broken, “For running into other customers, for harassing workers, for eating on rides, for swearing in front of customers, for harassing customers…” He continued for at least ten minutes before Sirius decided to snog him into oblivion.

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

kitchen light

The party was at its loudest, but all Marlene wanted was to ditch it. And that wasn’t like her at all. She loved parties. But she was hating this. There were so many people with alcohol polluting their breaths, grinding excessively close, mixing sweat, saliva, and the only person Marlene wanted to mix anything with was across the room, on her way to leave…

Dorcas was leaving. Because she’d only come here because of Pandora and now Pandora was out in the garden with Xenophilus, rolling the most illegal combination of drugs. Dorcas had left them to it, to let Pandora have a moment with her lover, because she didn’t want to third-wheel, and because she was beginning to realise she may be slightly addicted to drugs. Maybe. Actually, she wasn’t addicted, because an addict would never admit their addiction.

She was leaving because she was a good and healthy person. But as she turned the handle of the front door, she glanced back, and she didn’t know why at first, until she did. Her eyes immediately landed on Marlene, who was staring right at her. She raised a brow, before striding out of the open door.

Then she fell into her car, face slumped over the wheel. A few seconds later, Marlene opened the opposite door, sliding into the passenger seat like she’d been there a million times. She probably had, by now.

“Take me home,” Marlene said, eyes burning as she looked at Dorcas.

Dorcas raised a brow. “Sure.”

Marlene tapped her nails against the dashboard while Dorcas firmly fixed her gaze on the road ahead, in complete silence. Apart from the tap, tap, tap. Marlene wanted to talk. Dorcas didn’t. She didn’t want to do anything. She should’ve just smoked the joint.

She pulled up to Marlene’s house, where Marlene looked at her incredulously. “Not what I want.”

Dorcas smirked. “What do you want, then?”

Marlene stared at her, long and hard. “You know what.”

“So you want to rely on my assumption of what you want?”

“I want to lie on you,” Marlene deadpanned.

Dorcas snorted. “Thanks for clearing that up.”

Marlene flashed her a sugary smile. “No problem, honey. Now drive.”

And so Dorcas drove them to hers. So what if she did drive just a little bit faster? It didn’t mean anything. As soon as she’d parked, Marlene was dragging her through the passenger door, and she’d barely had time to lock the car before they were stumbling into the lift, and then they were snogging and oh. Lips and hands and skin. Soft and sweet and sin.

The doors pinged and they broke apart, racing down to Dorcas’s flat. Marlene grabbed the keys and unceremoniously flung the door open, slamming Dorcas against the back of the door as she tried to lock it again, with the added task of reciprocating Marlene’s fervent lip sucking and tongue clashing.

And Dorcas tried to push them in the direction of the bedroom. She really did. Because she wasn’t so desperate that they’d do it in the hallway. She made it as far as the kitchen doorway before Marlene began tearing off her clothes. And no, Dorcas did not last. They kissed each other’s bodies under the gleaming glow of the kitchen light.

Next morning, Marlene was gone. And Dorcas wouldn’t let it break her heart. Sprawled on her kitchen floor like a goddamn loser. Because Marlene always did this. And was she trying to break Dorcas’s heart? Did she know how she could?

So Dorcas took a shower. She went to work like normal. And she didn’t comment when she saw Marlene in the corner of the office, nursing a glass of water. And she didn’t comment when at the end of the day, Marlene decided to follow her out, batting her lovely eyes with a pretty little smirk.

She did comment when Marlene opened her passenger door, though. “I’m not a taxi.”

“Why waste fuel when we’re both going to your place?”

Dorcas sighed. And she began to drive.

With a little more decorum, they managed to walk to her flat. Once the door was closed, Marlene hummed, “I haven’t showered after last night yet.”

Dorcas swallowed. “That’s gross.”

“What if I shower now?”

“Less gross.”

“Anything to please you.” And then Marlene was stripping, walking to the bathroom like the place was hers. “Come with me.”

And so Dorcas did the same thing, which made more sense, seeing as the place was actually hers.

They snogged under the pouring water. It trickled through their mouths as they pressed against each other, steaming everything up in the impossible heat, yet Dorcas still wanted more. Their bodies slid against each other so smoothly, and Dorcas’s lips slid across Marlene’s body like she was an ice sculpture, melting from the heat of Dorcas’s touch.

And her gasps were so soft. Her breath against Dorcas’s skin as they devoured each other. And the pressure was perfect, the pain exquisite, and Dorcas knew her fingers could trace a map of Marlene’s body inside out. Marlene could do the same for her.

Then they were finished, and untangled, wearing different clothes, Marlene in Dorcas’s pyjamas as she sprawled across the bed. And Dorcas let herself stare until she fell asleep in her chair.

When she woke up, the window was open, and Marlene had gone. Yes, the bloody moron had climbed out, leaving the note, ‘Couldn’t find keys. Window again!’ Dorcas stared out of the open window, looking at the pipes Marlene somehow utilised as a ladder.

Then she flopped on her bed, still scented with Marlene. Or her, maybe. She and Marlene both smelled the same, after all. They rubbed off on each other, combining perfumes and soaps as much as saliva. Flowers and smoke, alcohol and honey, perfume and sweat. And now Dorcas couldn’t tell whose smell it was first.

She left the window open, glued herself to her bed, and her thoughts remained constant, too. They’d fucked in the shower. And her heart wasn’t broken. As much as she was glued to her bed, her heart was glued together. It began to rain, and Dorcas left the window open, because it was also glued like that. Everything was constant. Nothing would change. It was okay.

Next week, Dorcas’s mother came over, so she had to prepare a spare bedroom in her already cramped flat. To make matters worse, she had to avoid the lustful looks Marlene was sending her, because she could not take Marlene home while her mother was there.

Although Marlene didn’t seem to receive the message, because during their break when Dorcas was sipping her cup of coffee and daydreaming about the novel she was trying to read in her limited free time, Marlene sidled up to her with a cookie on a napkin, and passed it to her, mumbling, “You like sweet things.”

And yes, Dorcas liked sweet things very much. She especially liked the sweet Marlene, nervously biting her lip, gaze skittering around the café as she waited for Dorcas to respond, quietly, with a beautiful pink blush painting her cheeks. Was it pink or red? She decided it was both. Pink in sweetness, but red to warn her that this really wasn’t what she should do.

But when shift finished, she dragged Marlene to her car, up to her flat, where her mother opened the door to welcome her daughter and her daughter’s friend. She shouldn’t.

Marlene found the situation a mix of adorable and hilarious. Dorcas glared, and took her to bed anyway. They shed their clothes, and silently, while her mother was literally in the room next door, they fucked under the covers. And this time, even in the morning, they were holding each other close.

And Dorcas’s mother was none the wiser. It was better that way. She’d hate them if she knew the truth. And there was no truth, anyway. Marlene didn’t like Dorcas. She just liked her body.

Although when Marlene called Dorcas the next night, she was beginning to doubt everything she thought was fact. Because Marlene had her number, and wanted to ditch her own celebratory party with her favourite people in the world for Dorcas. But she was still keeping Dorcas as her dirty little secret. None of her friends knew where she was fucking off to, and as a matter of fact, neither did Dorcas.

So when Marlene slipped into her car, she innocently asked, “So where are we going?”

Marlene leaned forward and kissed her right on the mouth. And Dorcas tried to ignore the influx of thoughts screaming how Marlene only did that because no one could see them. So what? At least Dorcas knew it wasn’t wrong. She wasn’t wrong to long for Marlene. She wasn’t. Because how could something as innate and powerful as her desire be wrong? And how was it wrong to want someone as fierce and vibrant and buoyant as Marlene? It was perfectly natural. Sure, Marlene thought it was wrong to want Dorcas. But that’s because she was Dorcas.

Next week at the bar, Marlene was holding Sirius’s hand. And Dorcas tried very, very hard not to punch someone. But Sirius was a boy and Marlene was a girl and that was how the world worked. Sirius was the person Marlene wouldn’t be embarrassed to take to her own house, and show off to her parents, because he was perfect and handsome and kind, and a man. Dorcas could be handsome and kind, but she still wouldn’t be enough for Marlene. She wouldn’t earn her parents’ approval.

But Dorcas was the one Marlene fucked like salvation. Dorcas was the one who kept Marlene up all through the fucking night. Not Sirius. Sirius couldn’t touch what they had.

Except maybe he could, because now Marlene was constantly busy. Sirius was always calling her in her free time, picking her up, holding her hand, kissing her mouth, buying her motherfucking cookies— it was funny, really, the things that infuriated Dorcas the most. Cookies. They were sweet like Marlene, and Sirius knew it. Did he know it like Dorcas knew it?

He probably had to, seeing as he and Marlene were on their millionth date, going out to town dressed like the picture-perfect couple. And Dorcas was also going out, perfectly content with being single and solo. A breath of fresh hair. Hands in her pockets as she strode through the streets, because she had every right to them; a citizen just as much as Marlene and Sirius. And so what if she hoped to catch a glimpse of Marlene? It wasn’t going to happen.

Pandora kept telling her to move on. Date someone new. Or to live life a little more. Go explore with her. The woods, the rivers, the meadows. And so she tried. She really, really tried. She accidentally got into the habit of smoking one too many spliffs again. She was just trying to make it feel right whenever she was with someone new. There were girls, boys, and none of them could hold a candle to the flicker of joy in Marlene’s eyes whenever she was euphoric. Even the drugs didn’t help.

And her heart, previously glued together so that Marlene could never break it, was falling apart due to her own touch. Every time she took a drag, her heart cracked. Every time she met someone new, she convinced herself it wouldn’t work. And then she did meet someone, who maybe, maybe.

She tried to date Remus. He was peaceful and clever, and yet she wasn’t being fair to him, because she belonged to someone else. So she told him. And to her surprise, he told her. And suddenly, she wasn’t alone in her pining.

So she cut back on the drugs, and she and Remus continued to go out, but as friends, nothing more and nothing less. Because the bond between them did exist. Autumn passed, then winter, then spring, and Remus was her friend through it all, while Sirius and Marlene were more than friends, which punched them in the gut, and they admitted it plainly to each other. They cried together. And they set each other up, and sometimes casually got together, because that way they’d hurt no one with their love for someone else. They wouldn’t hurt people the way Marlene and Sirius did.

But, one day, Marlene called her. “Lover, I’ve missed you.”

Dorcas’s breath hitched. Marlene continued, “Do you think there’s some place we could go?”

And Dorcas should say no. Remus raised a brow at her as his own phone began to ring. But she wanted Remus to say yes. She wanted Remus to have his happy ever after. So, she said, “Yeah. I’ll pick you up.”

“No. I’ll do it this time.”

And maybe Marlene had changed. She vaguely heard Remus say, “Yeah,” as she stepped out of his apartment. Good for him. Would it be good for her?

She slid into Marlene’s passenger seat. And she realised she loved Marlene from this angle, where it wasn’t just her doing everything. Marlene glanced at her nervously. “Radio?”

Dorcas turned it all the way up for her.

And then they were hurtling down country roads in Marlene’s car, the stereo blasting ancient pop songs at them as they screamed the lyrics at the top of their lungs, not pausing even when most of the songs were love songs, even when they ended up yelling ‘I love you,’ in each others faces. Then Dorcas stared at Marlene, long and hard, as Marlene flustered under the intensity of it.

Finally, “I’ll give you my heart. But just know that if you break it, I’ll break your mouth. We clear?”

And Marlene smiled. “I love you. I’d leave this town with you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. I’d get away from my parents and all the boys and we’d get our own flat and it’ll be all I need. And we would be a thing.”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

aphrodite’s anger

“You have angered Aphrodite,” the Goddess Athena stated, lips pressed into a thin line as she stared at the subject of her patronage, Remus, who was scribbling away ardently on a piece of parchment at the rickety wooden desk by the slit-sized window.

He looked up with a furrowed brow, then squinted slightly as the sunlight shining through the slit hit his eyes. “How?”

Athena shot him a withering look. “I don’t know how to make this more overt. You are Remus Lupin. You are brilliantly sharp-witted and daring. You should therefore be living life to its fullest, taking courageous risks, making wild discoveries… and yet, you insist on cooping yourself up inside this shambolic shack, doing absolutely nothing. I only remain your patron in the hope that you somehow unlock your potential.”

Remus blinked. “Um. Sorry. Thank you, Goddess. But… how does this affect the Goddess Aphrodite?”

If possible, Athena looked even more annoyed. “Aphrodite does not understand why I stick with you. She has seen you rejecting adventure, never utilising your power, and, worst of all, seen you turn down love. She’s furious.”

“Oh.” Remus paused. “When did I ever turn down love?”

Athena looked like she was combusting out of frustration. She gritted her teeth. “I have helped you all I can. It is not my fault you are oblivious.” With that, she disappeared, leaving Remus to his old, derelict hut.

He wasn’t alone for long though, because only a few seconds later, the fisherman from the other side of the island swung the door open, calling, “Come out for a stroll, my love!”

Remus rolled his eyes. “For the last time, Sirius, I am not your love.”

Sirius mock-pouted. “Fine. But it’s not healthy to just stay in here all day! Come down to the coast, Remus.”

“I’ll pass.”

Sirius frowned. “What’s wrong?”

“…Nothing? Don’t I always turn you down?”

Sirius shrugged. “Yes. But usually you only look slightly pathetic, still convinced that you’re happy to live vicariously through your imaginary stories,” he explained, gesturing to the scrolls strewn across Remus’s shack. Remus frowned, but before he could defend himself, Sirius cut him off, “Now, you look like you’ve completely given up, even on your stories.”

Remus realised the truth to this observation, and he squinted at Sirius, not because of the sunlight, but because Sirius was confusing and strange and… different. A good different. A different which made Remus want to explore it, except Remus wasn’t an explorer, no matter how much Athena insisted he was. Really, he didn’t know why the Goddess still stuck with him. Or why Sirius did, still barging into his hut every evening without fail.

Finally, he admitted, “No point in writing anymore.” He shrugged in the most careless manner he could muster. “The Goddess Aphrodite is angry with me.”

He glanced up at Sirius, whose face had immediately fallen. In fact, Sirius had completely deflated, no longer looking animated and cheerful, just lost, like he’d been punched in the gut.

Quickly, Remus added, “Don’t worry, I’m sure it’s all fine. I’m fine.”

Then Sirius broke out of his frozen state, and threw himself at Remus, gripping him by the shoulders, shaking him, hugging him, vociferating, “No, this is not fine! She could kill you! Turn you into a monster! Drive you to insanity! Remus!” Remus listlessly nodded, and Sirius sighed, slumping into Remus. “I’d still love you, though. Even if you were dead, a monster, or insane. You’re already insane.”

Remus laughed at this, gently pushing Sirius off. It was a thoughtful joke. No one could really love someone like him. He was already dead: he was barely living his life. He was already a monster: every full moon since childhood, he turned into a wolf, not that Sirius knew that. And he was already insane, yes. His mind was a mess, churning with incongruous thoughts, forever spiralling and multiplying.

He looked thoughtfully at Sirius, out of his window, at his scrolls. He decided, fuck it, I’m going to die anyway, “Could I borrow a boat from you?”

Sirius raised his eyebrows, before his face split into a beautiful beam. “Come with me, my love.”

Again, Remus rolled his eyes, but this time, he actually followed the skipping Sirius out of the hut, as he frolicked like a dog through the woods, along his well-trodden path between the coast and Remus’s shack.

Remus meandered after him much more slowly, taking in the smell of the scenery. Pine, smoke, fresh grass, soil… he hadn’t been outside in so, so long, and it really showed. He had simply locked himself up in his small wooden lodge, and stayed there, even through the full moon. Ashamedly, the only food he ever ate was the fish Sirius sometimes brought up to share, when he sacrificed his time to sit cross-legged with Remus on the stained floorboards and talk about meaningless musings. Maybe even more ashamedly, those times were Remus’s most treasured.

He made it down to the coast, where Sirius was waiting, with a huge, handsome masterpiece of a boat behind him. Its prow was a tall, regal wolf, which simultaneously terrified Remus because that couldn’t be a coincidence or maybe it could, but also made him gape in awe, because it was undeniably majestic. Who ever saw a wolf in that way? Sirius just grinned at him. “She’s been waiting for you so long, dude.”

Remus blinked. Sirius looked down at his feet and bashfully hesitated, “I— I built her while I was thinking of you, just a few months ago. I didn’t think you’d ever sail her— but, now, maybe, you… could? If you wanted. There are other boats—”

Remus pressed a finger to Sirius’s lips. To silence him, but also because he just wanted to get closer. “Sirius. I love it. Thank you. I wish I could give you something this amazing too.”

If possible, Sirius grinned at him even more than before. He burst out, “Let me come with you.”

Remus frowned. “What?”

“I want to go with you. On your journey. It can be your gift to me.”

“No, coming with me won’t be a gift. I— I’m going because… either way, I’m going to die. I might as well live a little first. But if you come with me, you’ll surely die too.”

Sirius shrugged. “What if I want to live a little with you?”

“I don’t want you to die.”

“I don’t want you to die. But everyone’s going to die at some point. So let me live with you for as long as you have left.”

“I— I want to live with you too,” Remus confessed softly, to both himself and Sirius. “But it doesn’t matter. I won’t let you come.”

Sirius’s eyes flashed. “I won’t let you go without me.”

“And how will you manage that?”

“I built the boat. I know her better than you do. Don’t think I won’t be able to sneak on.”

“I’ll kick you off.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because,” and Sirius sighed, shaking his head slightly, looking up at Remus with a soft gaze, his previous temper melting. “Be safe, Remus.”

With that, he walked away, and Remus felt his chest ache, longing to reach out and pull Sirius back. But it was okay. He could now set off on his travels in solitude, like the lone wolf that he literally was. He clambered onto the boat, and realised he had no clue how to actually sail.

However, Athena was his patron for a reason, and he quickly got the hang of things. He figured out that he could untie the fabric neatly twisted around the central pole through the middle of the boat, and that it unravelled into perfectly square sheets which billowed in the direction of the wind. The boat was then propelled by the invisible force, and when the force changed direction, he could also rotate the mast so that the sails changed in the same direction.

When there was no wind, he realised how useful the oars were, and expeditiously learnt that this way meant he would go forward, this way meant he would turn left, this way meant right. He ended up in the middle of the still, open ocean, feeling incredibly accomplished. Aphrodite, he thought, I wouldn’t mind if you killed me now.

Remus stood in the middle of the deck for quite some time, arms outstretched on either side of his body as the wind blew through him, ruffling his hair and filling his nose with a pinch of salty air. He closed his eyes, relaxed, letting himself feel, without the constant pressure of thoughts.

It didn’t last long though. Because at the noise of a door banging open, his eyes immediately flew open too. Right in front of him, from a small hatch in the floorboards, three fishermen stepped out, and Remus stepped back.

“Sirius,” he stated dumbly.

Sirius grinned. “Nice to see you too, Remus. This here’s James.” He pointed to the fisherman beside him, who shared his dark hair and height, but was wildly different from him in all other aspects. While Sirius’s eyes were a metallic grey, sparkling near-white in the light, James’s were a dark brown, so dark that Remus couldn’t see what was within them. James’s hair was a bird’s nest, and Sirius’s hair was a waterfall. Sirius’s skin was pale, James’s skin was brown.

But then James smiled, “Hi,” and Remus saw it match Sirius’s mischief almost identically. This was going to be trouble. Ignoring the trouble, he turned to the other boy, raising an eyebrow.

The short, plump fisherman just hesitantly smiled at him, and Remus deemed that he was probably more sensible than the other two, but equally clueless.

“That’s Peter,” Sirius pointed. He added, “Are you going to say anything?”

Remus simultaneously wanted to remain in unresponsive silence forever, and yell his head off at Sirius. Compromising, he turned around, and said, “Get off.”

“No,” Sirius sang. “You’re stuck with us.” He paused, adding more solemnly, “We’re just here to help.”

Remus’s shoulders slumped, and he turned around in a way that he was still pointedly not looking at Sirius, but at the other two. “And you both are here because…?”

James smirked, eyeing Sirius, before saying, “We’ve heard so much about you, it’s like we know you personally. Basically, we’re already friends.”

Remus considered this, quickly realising, “You’re the two best friends Sirius is always on about!”

James muttered, “Not in the same way he’s always on about you,” while Peter smiled, asking, “So… we’re already your friends too?”

Choosing to ignore James’s nonsensical comment, he addressed Peter, shaking his head and deciding, “Yes.” Yes, they were indeed his friends.

Sirius clapped his hands together. “That was heart-warming,” he declared, juxtaposing his statement by glaring at James, for presumably more nonsensical reasons. “Anyway, we are on a mission. Onwards! I think the next island is in a couple twenty miles.”

Remus threw his head back in frustration, before turning to face Sirius, who was already glaring at him with daggers that dared, “Fight me and you’ll lose.”

“Fine,” Remus spat. “Stay and die.”

“Thank you,” Sirius spat back.

Giving up, Remus walked to the trapdoor and disappeared below deck.

“He means well,” Remus heard a voice say, maybe twenty minutes later.

He turned from one of the mattresses to see James, nearing him with an amiable smile.

Remus snorted. “To who? Himself? No, he’s going to get himself killed. To you and Peter? No, he’s put you both in danger too.”

James shrugged. “He’d never let any of us die. And he means well to you.” James then looked at Remus very intensely, and Remus’s gaze skittered across the cabin, unable to handle it. Finally, James spoke, “He loves you.”

Remus just turned around on his mattress and tried to sleep. He couldn’t. But soon, sleep didn’t matter, as the boat began to rock violently, and Remus’s mattress full-on slid to the other side of the cabin. He shot up, and hurried to the top deck, where… there was nothing. In fact, the boat was still, empty, completely silent. But before he could question everyone’s disappearance, he saw it.

The most beautiful… creature he had ever seen. He was immediately enamoured with its long, scaly body, rising up over his head as it opened its lovely jaws, which were really so mesmerising. Its roar was mellifluous. Its eyes were so yellow and shiny. The creature made him feel so calm, peaceful, and he stepped closer and closer—

“NO!” The ferocious cry cut through Remus’s thoughts. His head jerked to the side abruptly, trying to locate its source as he deliriously concluded that actually the thing that made that cry had the most mellifluous voice in the world… so magical…

The beast roared again. No, that was the prettiest—

“LEAVE HIM!” No, that was the prettiest—

Roar! No, that was the prettiest—

“YOU VILE, REPUGNANT MONSTER!” A series of grunts, accompanied by the slashing of a sword. Remus shook his head, eyes landing on Sirius as he lunged at a giant serpent, which hissing at him, poised to kill him…

Remus didn’t know what to do. Well, there was one thing. He’d never done it before. It required a very strong emotion. And Remus didn’t do strong emotions. Only, he did, he just bottled them up and pretended they didn’t exist. But, looking at Sirius, he felt it churning within him, bursting from the seams of his skin as it exploded, erupted, surged out from the depths of his heart. Love.

Yes, okay, kill him for it — he was irrevocably in love with Sirius. Happy? The wolf within him was happy, at least. He let it grip onto the powerful emotion, let it overcome him, let himself transform, forcefully, willingly, in the light of a crescent moon. Before he was fully transformed, still with a grasp on his consciousness, he leapt onto the serpent, to ensure that it was the thing he would attack.

And attack it he did. They tore at each other, roaring, howling, ripping off chunks of flesh — no worse than what Remus did to himself, really, locked up in a tiny shack. Soon the wolf realised the serpent’s weakness: every time a claw swiped near one of its eyes, it would flinch, blink rapidly, reel backward. And so, the wolf quickly pierced its two bulbous eyes with a flash of claws, and suddenly, the serpent collapsed, and both of them tumbled into the sea.

Remus transformed back as he broke the surface, broken, defeated, with viscous yellow pus coating his hands, and blood dribbling from the cuts all over his chest, swirling in the dark blue water. He didn’t have the energy to swim back up. And he wasn’t sure he wanted to, anyway. Sirius had seen him as a wolf. As soon as he emerged, he’d be slaughtered. And he wouldn’t let the man he loved get any blood on his sweet, innocent hands.

But apparently, he didn’t have a choice in the matter. Because arms were wrapping around him, pulling him up to the surface, and as soon as they reached air, he heard two desperate inhales. One was his own. The other was… Sirius.

Sirius stared at him, breathing heavily into his face, and Remus knew he was doing the exact same. Their arms were wrapped around each other, and they were impossibly close, and Sirius looked relieved, not disgusted.

“So,” Remus caught his breath. “I— I’m a werewolf.”

Sirius released a breathy laugh, gesturing to the prow piece. “I know.”

“What? And you still… did all this?”

Sirius nodded, eyes sparkling, a small, shy smile on his face.

Remus blinked, squeezing Sirius to make sure he was real, which caused Sirius’s smile to grow less shy, more wide. “But— but you called that monster,” and Remus pointed below, “vile, and—”

“Shh,” Sirius whispered, breathing into his mouth, and Remus immediately shut up. “You’re not a monster. I distinctly remember being concerned that Aphrodite would turn you into a monster. Why would I be worried about that if I thought you were one already?”

“Oh.” Remus paused. “Well, your concerns were erroneous. I think Aphrodite’s punishment was to enchant me with a monster.”

Sirius grimaced. “Don’t tell me you were in love with that thing.”

Remus shook his head. “I broke the enchantment.”

“Uh… how?”

Remus sucked in a breath. “Well, real love usually has the power to overcome fake infatuations.”

“Oh? So, who are you really in love with, then? Hmm,” Sirius teasingly pondered.

Remus tightened his hold on Sirius. “You know who.”

“I’d like to hear you say it.”

“Fine.” Remus stuck his chin up defiantly. “I’m in love with you. Happy?”

“Very,” Sirius responded, immediately crushing his lips into Remus’s.

Although Remus broke away when he felt a presence looming over them. Sirius looked dazed for a moment, before his eyes also landed on the Goddess hovering over them.

“Aphrodite,” Remus acknowledged wearily.

She simply grinned devilishly. “Finally.” And then, she grumbled, “And I suppose Athena was right about you. Daring, smart, worthy of her patronage. I thought you might let the beast kill you all. But no, Athena was right. Damn you, now I’ve lost a bet. Although I believe I’m winning the bet on Marlene and Dorcas…” With that, she disappeared.

Remus blinked, before bursting into laughter.

From above, on the deck of the boat, James and Peter looked down at them. “Should we haul them up yet?” Peter asked.

“First I have to check something,” James responded. He dramatically cupped his hands around his mouth, and yelled, “HAVE YOU TWO SNOGGED YET?!”

Remus smirked. “Not yet.” And then he captured Sirius’s mouth in his own, and they snogged senselessly.

_________________

Back on the deck of the ship, Remus sighed and said, “Well, I suppose I should return to my writing.”

All three heads whipped around to face him incredulously.

“Excuse me?” Peter burst out, while the others seemed too speechless.

Remus frowned. “What?”

“You must keep adventuring!” James eventually cried.

“Remus.” Sirius stated gravely. “You don’t need to write stories anymore. You’re living the stories. With us.”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

rafflesia

To his surprise, when he opened the door, it opened. Yes, Sirius was aware that sounded like nothing out of the ordinary, but it really was, because he’d been trying to open that door for the past month, with zero success whatsoever. It just wouldn’t budge! As if it were a wall of concrete, bolstered by lead! But today — today it gave way as easily as a crumbling sandcastle! Forgive him for being bewildered, but it was rather dubious.

Despite these suspicious circumstances, Sirius took his chance for what it was, and strode into the room. He’d been waiting a month, after all. What was there to lose?

In fact, there was only gain. Finally, he saw the numerous scrolls and maps sketched by the traitorous cartographer, whom he’d made to walk the plank a month ago on grounds of treason against him, Captain Black. How dare that cartographer withhold the maps and scrolls from him, and how dare he continue to withhold said maps and scrolls, even in death, with convoluted security measures such as concrete-like doors? Well, thankfully that scheming sack of scum was a cartographer no longer, worth less to Sirius than the limpet on the bottom of his boat.

Eagerly, he reached out to grab a scroll—

Bang!

The door slammed shut. He frowned; walked over to it; tried opening it— no. It had returned to its state of concrete. Would Sirius have to wait yet another month for it to crumble again? Well, at least this time he’d have his maps. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for those precious pieces of parchment. Without them, he’d never find the real treasure.

So, again, eagerly, he reached out to grab a scroll—

Crunch!

Something bit into his leg. All fine, just his wooden leg. Although not fine, because how dare something bite the leg of the captain? He looked down, but the culprit was gone, instead leaving a splintered hole in the wooden floorboards, gaping widely like the mouth of a whale. Maybe it had been made by a whale, although why a whale would want a bite of a wooden leg was beyond him. Actually, he decided that he could understand — his leg was whittled from the finest timber, after all. Who wouldn’t want it? A shame, really, because only the mightiest captains could possess such a glorious material.

And as the mighty captain that he was, he shrugged off the strange occurrence carelessly; nothing could hurt someone as powerful as him. And what would he be even more untouchable with? Those scrolls.

Eagerly, he reached out to grab a scroll—

Crash!

Okay, what now?! He saw it, actually. This time, in his peripheral vision, he saw the flash of a twisting, red, sucker-covered, jelly-like tentacle surge out of the hole and send a shelf of scrolls careening to the floor. Either he was hallucinating, or seeing the truth, and it had to be the latter, because he was a captain, and captains didn’t go mad.

He called, “Face me, coward!” into the cavernous pit left by the beast, drawing his sword as he prepared for battle.

Yet it didn’t emerge. How lily-livered. And as a brave, noble captain like him didn’t have time for feeble, pathetic wretches, he sheathed his sword, and returned to his task. Ah, yes, the scrolls.

Eagerly, he reached out to grab a scroll—

Crash! Bang! Crunch! The room was engulfed by a swarm of tentacles, madly flailing in the air, toppling crates, boxes, scrolls— no! Not the scrolls! Everything was tumbling into the depths of the hole, even the scrolls, and in a frenetic frenzy, Sirius leapt for them, panicking even more when he realised he couldn’t move.

He looked down. Leering up at him with monstrous golden eyes was the head of the beast, its fleshy red lips encasing his wooden leg. It really did have a thing for timber. Oh, the woes of being wealthy — constantly coveted by jealous vagabonds. It also meant that he couldn’t move. Doubly infuriating.

“Get off of me, you slobbering oaf! I need to retrieve my maps!” He attempted to kick the beast away, but its grip was impressively unshakeable, Sirius’s attempts hopelessly futile. He took offence to this, because he was a ferocious captain — nothing he did could possibly be futile.

Determinedly, he drew his sword and slashed at the beast, and when it held on, he swiped a jarring scar across its face, blood sluicing from the cut like crimson downpour. It let out a guttural, blood-curdling howl, releasing Sirius’s leg, only to pounce upon his face, and he was saved by his skilful reflexes alone.

Blood began blooming beneath every inch of the beast’s skin as it rose higher and higher and higher, like a contorted, vermilion flower, burgeoning from the depths of the ocean, thick tentacles for petals, and a humongous head for the centre. One of those ugly flowers, of course: the biggest, most pungent flower, located deep in the depths of rainforests; rare, yet impossible to miss.

The beast widened its jaws, revealing a set of bone-white knives, the tips dripping shimmering, viscous blood, spreading and spreading and spreading. Blood. Everywhere. And then, like a bullet, it surged forward. Like the agile captain that he was, Sirius dodged. But alas, there was only one of him, and he was outnumbered by the multitude of deranged, writhing tentacles. As much as his sword slashed and his body dodged, he couldn’t escape.

He took a breath, before a tentacle wrapped around his waist, and pulled him under. But, funnily, the pressure of the tentacle felt more like a hug.

It pulled him down through each level of the ship, then below it, where the sea had parted to create a tunnel, violently swirling round and round, unable to break through the invisible border. They went down, down, down the tunnel, and while it became darker and darker, the water seemed to get calmer. It was a still, dark blue, cylindrical wall, no longer the thrashing, foamy sea. It cast shadows over the beast, and in the eerie light, its skin glowed an incandescent red, battling the darkness with striking vibrancy. Sirius felt grounded by it, drawn to the red gleam as a pirate is so often drawn to danger.

He felt himself leaning closer, closer still, until he tumbled over, and suddenly landed on his feet in a vast underwater sea cave, flanked by crystal stalagmites. There, the beast dropped him, but now, it seemed like less of a beast. In its home, it was grand, imposing, majestic.

It took a step back from Sirius, and usually, he would despise such acts of mercy, but this was more an act of forgiveness — despite the way he’d bloodied and bruised it, the beast still didn’t harm him. Struggling to say the words which he would never, ever use, Sirius somehow gruffly muttered, “Sorry. Thanks for… not killing me.” Yet. It still could, really, except… except now it smiled, and Sirius knew ‘yet’ wasn’t going to happen at all, because its smile was toothy and trustful and true, and its pointed teeth only served to make the smile all the more adorably awkward. A beast, with the heart of a dolphin.

“What are you?” Sirius asked wondrously.

In response to his question, the beast began to curl in on itself.

“Oh, no, don’t hide,” Sirius hurriedly coaxed, but it simply curled in further, like it was shrinking. Sirius rushed forward, reaching out to gently uncurl it, but before he could touch its red, fleshy skin, it had transformed into a rich, deep brown, human arm, veins protruding, skin marked by a few bruises, all of varying shades, ages, sizes.

He gasped, staggering backwards. “YOU!”

“Me,” the cartographer nodded with a light smile on his face, which now had a silvery scar running from his left eyebrow to the right corner of his lip. Sirius winced. That was his doing. He felt a strange emotion course through him, and somehow the only way to relieve it was…

“Sorry,” he blurted. “I gave you a…” he gestured vaguely to Remus’s face, and Remus ran a hand across it.

“Ah,” he said. “Don’t worry. Sorry, bet it’s ugly.”

“What?! No, it’s hot, you wear it like a badge of bravery, like a survivor—” Sirius clamped his mouth shut, as a flush took over his face.

Remus simply smiled at him with a strange look in his eyes, limbs stretching out as he stood up, now only a hair’s breadth taller than Sirius. “Thanks, Sirius.”

Sirius frowned, shaking himself. No one ever thanked him. Coldly, he said. “You should be dead. You walked the plank.”

Remus gave him a flat look. “I’m a sea beast. You cannot drown me.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“You weren’t supposed to.”

“That’s withholding information from your captain. I’ll have your guts for garters.”

“My bad. I think I’m still withholding some more,” Remus smirked, gesturing into the hollow behind him, where all of Sirius’s scrolls were.

Eagerly, he reached out to grab a scroll—

“No,” Remus pointedly chided, firmly pushing Sirius’s hand away.

“How dare you—”

“IF YOU WOULD LET HIM SPEAK!” A cacophony of voices chorused, and Sirius’s eyes widened comically.

“Is this… divinity?”

Remus snorted. “Hardly.”

“OI!” The voices yelled indignantly.

“Right, if you would all let me explain,” Remus drawled. “Sirius—”

“It’s Captain Black to you.”

Remus looked at him flatly. “Sirius. The reason I can’t let you touch these maps is… because I didn’t actually draw them for you.” He breathed softly, “They’re maps to find my homeland. Where… sea beasts like me could be.”

“Oh,” Sirius responded dumbly. He collected himself, and began in a businesslike manner, “Well, I asked you to draw maps to aid us in finding treasure, and you have disobeyed me, so I still have to sentence you.”

Remus shrugged. “I made maps to find my own type of treasure.”

“That’s… sentimental of you. Not a very good pirate trait. We’re after real treasure, Lupin. Gold. Jewels. Money.”

Remus looked at him sadly. “But do those make you feel, Sirius? What does all the riches in the world matter if you never feel at home, constantly after the next big thing, then the next, because still it’s never enough? It’s never enough, because you’re not at home, Sirius.”

Sirius blinked, stumped for words. Remus had a point, perhaps. It did never feel like enough, and it was the reason he was constantly after those scrolls, to fix it, to fix himself, with money, gold, jewels. But already had all of that, and he realised, with a jolt, that it fixed nothing. “Remus. How do we find this home, then?”

Remus’s face split into a dazzling grin. “I’ve been waiting for you to ask that for ages.” And then he yelled, “WEIGH ANCHOR!”

The cave began to rumble, and Sirius felt it rising upward.

From a hidden alcove, concealed by craggy stalactites, a group of people walked out, and yelled, “AYE!” at the top of their lungs. Sirius recognised the cry as the not-divine voices, and, even more startlingly, he recognised their faces.

There was Lily, his ex-doctor, whom he’d made to walk the plank after she gave medicine to an enemy, now with a captain’s hat atop her flaming hair. There was James, his ex-quartermaster, whom he’d made to walk the plank after he drank the last barrel of rum. Marlene, his ex-cook, whom he’d made to walk the plank after she tried to poison him. Dorcas, his ex-gunner, whom he’d made to walk the plank after she tried to fire a cannon at him. Peter, his ex-cabin boy, whom he’d made to walk the plank for being pathetic. Mary, his ex-boatswain, whom he’d made to walk the plank for putting a spider on his bed. In fact, everyone he had ever made to walk the plank was there, either smiling at him in a sickly-sweet manner, or blatantly glaring daggers at him. The one exception was James, who was genuinely beaming at him. Sirius always did regret drowning James.

“I see you finally got through to his thick skull, cartographer,” Lily told Remus, mirroring his grin.

“Aye, captain,” Remus nodded, eyes sparkling as they danced over Sirius’s expression, which was complete and utter bafflement.

“Right. Introductions,” Lily said, now in a shrewd tone as she directed her gaze to Sirius. “I’m the captain. Mary’s my quartermaster.

Mary grinned, wiggling her fingers at Sirius, whose jaw was slowly but steadily sinking to the floor. She sent him a wink, “Marlene’s the gunner, and so’s Dorcas, because they both like shooting things.”

Marlene and Dorcas high-fived, before pointing at Peter. “The cook!” Marlene cried.

“He’s very good at turning rats into delicacies,” Dorcas added sagely, while Peter flushed scarlet.

James pointed to himself. “Doctor. Effie and Monty taught me well.”

“Yes, he’s surprisingly good at it,” Lily noted.

Remus leaned conspiratorially towards Sirius, “She still thinks no one’s as good as her.”

“Oi, mate, I’m not Sirius Black,” she retorted.

“Yeah, no one’s as self-obsessed as that old codger,” Marlene agreed, smirking at Sirius.

“Crew, don’t insult the cabin boy,” Dorcas teasingly scolded them.

They all grinned vindictively at Sirius. “And you’re the cabin boy,” the not-divine voices chorused.

Sirius opened and closed his mouth like a fish. He knew he’d been demoted to the lowest of the low, but frankly, he didn’t know how to argue against it. Finally, he turned to Remus. “And… what are you?”

Remus smiled. But before he could answer, the not-divine voices began overlapping each other, Marlene gushing, “He’s only the most brilliant cartographer.”

“Mate, he literally designed this ship,” Dorcas gestured to the cave around them in a you-should-know-this sort of manner directed at Sirius.

“Best boatswain ever,” James announced, clapping Remus on the shoulder enthusiastically.

“Ship therapist,” Lily quipped, and Remus sent her a withering glare, the effect majorly dampened by his barely concealed smile.

“Giant sea beast,” Peter said. “In case I ever run out of rats, I’ll always have a fall-back option.”

“Peter, you can’t cook me,” Remus rolled his eyes.

Sirius blinked. “Well. I’m glad to be part of the crew? And… did you say this was the ship?”

All of them simultaneously raised a brow. The cave-ship broke the surface of the water. Remus held out a hand to him. “Wanna explore, cabin boy?” Eagerly, Sirius reached out to grab Remus’s hand.

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

matchmakers

A huge group of fifth year, sixth year, and seventh year Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws, and Slytherins were all gathered in a massive circle in the Gryffindor common room, because everyone wanted to play the Marauders’ famous party games (although only fifth years and above were allowed to, this late and night, and with this much booze).

Currently, they were about to play spin the bottle. (James’s choice. What a surprise, not like he was trying to kiss Lily again… yes, he was being a humongous hyperactive wanker on the right of Sirius, batting his lashes at the poor redhead who was somehow starting to like him, adamantly claiming that he should spin first, with Lily flirt-arguing with him from the opposite side of the circle that he was being a self-entitled prat, let someone else spin first…) Anyway, while the large group was deciding who should spin first, which was honestly taking way more time than necessary (Lily and James’s faults), Sirius glanced to his left, where Remus was twirling his wand with a suspiciously thoughtful expression. Sirius grinned. That was Moony’s pranking face.

“What’re you planning, Moonykins?” Sirius whispered, nudging the boy beside him.

“I’m thinking… I might manipulate that bottle,” Remus nodded towards the empty firewhiskey bottle in the centre. “Make it land on the person’s perfect match,” he grinned. “Because some people are taking far too long to get together.” He pointedly eyed Marlene and Dorcas, Mary and Emmeline, Lily and James, Tilden and Daisy… really, Sirius realised, there were so many people in this circle who needed to get their shit together and get together.

Sirius laughed at Remus’s expressive, pointed look, all raised eyebrows and wide eyes. “Playing Cupid, are we?”

Remus rolled his eyes. “No, just that we’re in seventh year, and Dorlene still hasn’t kissed. Like, what the fuck?”

“Dorlene, Dorlene, Dorlene, Dorleeeene, I’m begging of you, please don’t take my man,” Sirius whisper-yelled into Remus’s ear.

“Gerroff, you big mutt,” Remus laughed, shoving Sirius off.

Sirius pouted. Then an over-excited glint shone in his eyes, “Ooh, can I play Cupid’s assistant? I know a couple more couples who need to sort their shit out,” and he pointedly eyed Pandora and Xenophilius, Benjy and Caradoc, Stubby and Doris, Adrian and Florence… wow, there were so many not-yet-coupled couples here.

Remus nodded at Sirius’s point, also looking mildly shocked at just how much unlocked potential was in this room. “Look,” he nodded to the centre, where they’d finally decided who would spin it. “Gideon’s spinning.”

“Ooh,” Sirius said. “Land it on Chike.” And seamlessly, the rotating bottle seemed to naturally come to a stop on Gideon’s perfect match, and when they kissed, the matchmakers knew they’d done their job right.

“Wow,” Sirius commented. “You’re bloody brilliant at that spell.”

“And that was a bloody brilliant match of yours, Padfoot,” Remus nodded in satisfaction, both congratulating themselves on a job well done.

Then Barty was spinning. “Evan,” Sirius said. “Their star signs match.”

Remus gave him an amused look, rolling his eyes, yet listening to Sirius regardless of how stupid he thought matching star signs were. And Sirius was right, they did match. “Told ya so,” Sirius arrogantly murmured into Remus’s ear.

“Still don’t think it was the stars.”

“It definitely was.”

“They just had compatible personalities.”

“Because of the staaaaars.”

“Bullshit.”

Sirius pouted. “I’m a star. Are you calling me bullshit?”

Remus smirked. “Hmm.” Sirius pouted even more. Remus burst out laughing and patted his head. “I love you because you’re utter bullshit, Padfoot.”

“Wow,” Sirius replied, turning his nose up at Remus. “And I really thought we had something.”

Remus nudged Sirius for his attention. “Not as much as Sybil and Taseefa,” Remus excitedly hissed, pointing as he discreetly directed Sybil’s spin to land on the girl. He and Sirius high-fived. And then proceeded to turn it into some complicated handshake, all while attentively watching as the girls realised their love for each other.

“Matchmakers,” Sirius dramatically whisper-yelled.

Eventually, they managed to get Dorlene (Dorlene!) together, finally, when Marlene’s spin landed on Dorcas, and they both took on unnatural shades of red, before hesitantly kissing, then full-on making out. (Yes, Remus and Sirius cheered so hard.)

But then, the bottle was in Regulus’s possession, and Sirius began shaking Remus’s arm violently, whisper-yelling, “No! We cannot tarnish that innocent boy’s… innocence! My baby brother! Don’t let him kiss anyone! No one here’s good enough for him!”

Unbothered, Remus simply let Sirius clutch him for dear life, and Sirius sank in closer, because no matter what, whenever Sirius was being overbearing and emotional, Remus never seemed to shake him off. Sirius thought that maybe the only person good enough for his brother was Remus, being as fine and perfect as he was, but even that was pushing it.

Remus hummed thoughtfully, actually considerate over Sirius’s concerns, which any other person would normally dismiss as melodramatic. “What if I land it on you?”

“WHAT?!” Sirius couldn’t control his indignant yell, but he did tone it down to hiss, “Just because my whole family is a bunch of inbred motherfuckers and brotherfuckers does not mean I am! I refuse to carry on any traditions of the Blacks, how fucking dare you—”

Remus just laughed. “You won’t kiss on the mouth, moron. Just the cheek.”

“Oh.” Sirius dumbly answered. “Uh, do that, then.”

“As you wish.” The bottle landed on Sirius, and Regulus grimaced.

Sirius grinned, tapping his cheek. “On the cheek, brother dear.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, closing his lips in a tight line before moving to Sirius and pecking his cheek. “Aw, don’t wanna kiss your brother?” Sirius joked, before grabbing Regulus and placing a very sloppy kiss on his cheek.

With a scowl, Regulus cast some cleaning spell over said cheek, deadpanned, “Ew,” before sitting back down next to Barty and Evan, who had started making out again. Regulus glanced at them, half-disgusted and half-yes-my-dumb-as-fuck-friends-are-finally-together, then looked around the rest of the circle (of which most couples were snogging, thanks to Remus and Sirius) with visible confusion and concern, before announcing, “You know what, I’m very asexual.”

He then stood up and went to a table in the corner to discuss high-level potions with Severus, who was mixing drinks as if they were fascinating chemicals and he were a mad scientist.

“I’m glad to hear it,” Sirius called after Regulus. “No one in this world’s good enough for you anyway.”

Regulus merely smirked, before taking a sip of one of Severus’s concoctions and commenting on it in a way that made the boy's pasty skin flush. “I didn’t say anything about my romantic orientation, Sirius.”

Sirius frowned, while Remus muttered, “Think we got ourselves another match over there.”

“WHAT?!”

“Ooh, look, Frank’s got the bottle,” Remus squealed, successfully grabbing Sirius’s attention because Remus never squealed, but he really needed to start, because it was fucking adorable, and was causing Sirius to stare and gape at his face.

Remus smiled when he looked over at him, asking teasingly, “Unsure who to match him with?”

Words immediately poured out of Sirius’s open mouth, because it was so glaringly obvious who to pair Frank with that even asking that question was a cause for concern. “Of course I know! Alice!”

Remus smirked, watching as Frank and Alice finally kissed. “All in a day’s work.”

After a few more spins, where Remus and Sirius performed their elaborate matchmaking handshake and Sirius kept whisper-yodelling “Matchmakers,” the bottle wound up in Sirius’s lap, and on his right, James began insistently nudging him to “Spin it, spin it, spin it!”

“Who’d you want me to land it on?” Remus murmured into Sirius’s ear.

Truthfully, Sirius didn’t want to spin the bottle at all. He wanted to sit in his little matchmaking bubble of heaven with Remus by his side, and not go off with some ‘perfect match’, because he’d always prefer his friends over any lover anyway. “Uh. Don’t bother. I’ll just let it spin,” Sirius replied awkwardly.

Remus grinned and winked at him. “Oh, you think you’ll get lucky, what with being Cupid’s assistant, right?”

Butterflies fluttered in Sirius’s stomach, and he spun. He watched, holding his breath, as the bottle came to a slow, unmanipulated stop on Remus. He looked the boy in the eye, and realised with a soft murmur, “I think I did get lucky,”  before leaning forward and crushing their lips together. And with that, the matchmakers had been matched.

_________________

Lily Evans was watching the opposite side of the circle in amusement, where Remus and Sirius thought that they were being incredibly ingenious by charming the bottle to land on the person they shipped the spinner with. It was pretty funny, watching those enamoured boys act like they could play Cupid, yet failing to do so with themselves.

Surprisingly, no one else seemed to notice, even though what they were doing was blazingly obvious. Okay, not that obvious. In fact, all the whispering just made them look like a giggly couple, and no one saw any difference. But Lily knew they were not a couple, not yet, although she could make it happen, because any spell the Marauders did, she could do better. (It was her sole principle.)

And so, she pulled out her wand. The matchmakers got matched.

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

Hii, i just wanted to say that i just read your microfics and I wanted to say that they're amazing, i've loved them so much i just love the characterization and the way they're written <333

Hope you have a great dayy

hii, thank you so much<3 really, I appreciate this sm, thank you, I hope you keep liking them.. ;) and have many great days dude :))

[moutainrusing]

happily heterosexual

With a black bottle of dangerously sloshing firewhiskey loosely gripped in his hand, James clambered onto the top of a burgundy sofa, and where usually a Gryffindor’s head would rest, were James’s bare feet, because he was hammered out of his mind and apparently too sweaty for shoes. And toes helped him grip the cushion better, otherwise he would most definitely fall off.

Quite frankly, Sirius found it disgusting, and leapt off of the sofa immediately, wrinkling his nose and hissing, “What are you doing?!”

“Shhhhh,” James unsteadily waved a hand at him, which caused the daft sod to unceremoniously grip onto Sirius’s arm to maintain his balance. “I needa announce spin the bo’uhl… s’my only chance to kiss Lil… Lily…” He gestured wildly, arms flailing on either side. “She needs to ‘ear that we’re playin’!”

“Mate, you don’t need to resort to kissing games anymore,” Sirius shook his head, half-exasperated, half-fond. “I dunno how you managed it, but she’s warming up to you. Somehow.”

James grinned, proudly pointing to the Head Boy badge which he still had on, pinned to his casual Muggle t-shirt, because he was an utter snob. “Coz of this… duh…”

“You cast some Lily-attracting spell on it, then? That explains it.”

“No! She fell in love with my natural charm!”

“That does not explain it.”

“Oh, juss shut uppp, I wanna kiss her now…”

“You’re drunk.”

Ignoring him, James cupped his hand around his mouth and yelled, “LES PLAY SPIN THE BO’UHL!”

And then he toppled over. Thinking fast, Sirius cast a spell to levitate the firewhiskey before it spilled over the rugs. Priorities. Also, he knew that Remus would come to James’s rescue. He was right. Before James hit the ground, Sirius saw it soften with a cushioning charm, and James gently landed with a bounce.

Remus appeared, looking downright pissed off. “SIRIUS. Why couldn’t you have levitated both of them?”

“Many reasons, actually. Prongs was being an idiot and he deserved it. I love it when you play the hero. And you look bloody hot when you’re mad.”

“Shut up.” Remus ignored him, crouching to look at James. “I think he’s unconscious. How much did he drink?”

“Well. He has the right to drink as much as he wants.”

“We’re carrying him up,” Remus stated, taking James’s left while Sirius took his right.

“Ugh, why’d you have to get bladdered, Prongs?” Sirius whined, lugging him up the stairs.

James made an incoherent groan. Remus frowned. “Are you actually unconscious?”

James sheepishly opened his eyes. “Well. I acciden’ly fell, but that’s embarrassin’. Bein’ unconscious s’better.”

Remus rolled his eyes so far that they disappeared. Sirius grinned. “Ah, yes, the preferred option.”

James turned to glare at him, which was rather weak in his intoxicated state. “I ain’t forgoh’en ‘ow you saved the boh’uhl, but not me. I should be your pref… preferred…”

“Sorry, my sweet. Deep down, you know you’re my favourite.”

“Mm, I forgive you.”

They reached their dormitory, kicked open the door, dragged James to his bed, and dumped him there with a thud.

“Oof,” James muttered. As Sirius and Remus turned to leave, Remus still looking very annoyed and Sirius still grinning stupidly, James rolled to face them, saying, “One las’ thing… you hafta promise me… if I can’t kiss my true love tonight, ev’ryone else has to kiss their true loves.” He wiggled his eyebrows ridiculously. “Startin’ with you two! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss…” And James proceeded to drift off into sleep.

Unlike Sirius, who was majorly concerned about James’s belief that he and Remus were true loves, and intensely panicking about it because they most certainly were not, because they didn’t like each other that way, and yes, Remus was heroic and lovely and hot, but Remus was his friend, and he couldn’t possibly… and Remus was a boy, and Sirius was also a boy, and they were both happily heterosexual… anyway, unlike Sirius, who was having a breakdown, Remus seemed perfectly calm. In fact, he casually asked, “You think it’s safe to leave him here alone?”

Sirius coughed awkwardly, but Remus didn’t comment, so it was all fine. Eventually, he managed the words, “I think I’ll stay with him.” Because James was a pathetic loser in dire danger of maybe vomiting, or going mad, and he needed looking after, even if it meant Sirius had to miss out on the party.

Remus nodded, and moved to sit down on his bed. “Oh! Don’t worry, you can go back down,” Sirius said.

“Nah, I’ll stay with you. Keep you company, since that oaf’s doing nothing,” Remus replied, pointing at James with amusement.

“Oh. Thanks.” Sirius moved to sit on his own bed, across from Remus’s.

Usually, this was the time he would dive into a passionate ramble about how Bertie Bott missed a very important bean flavour, guess which one (the Sirius-flavour); or how tomorrow they should stuff Slughorn’s cupboard with slugs and horns; or how the walls surrounding them would not be shades of red if Godric’s favourite colour was purple… anything. Sirius could talk to Remus about anything. Except now he didn’t want to talk to Remus, he wanted to kiss Remus, and it was all James’s fault, because before this, he’d only ever wanted to kiss girls, and oh shit, he was staring at Remus’s face, and Remus was raising an eyebrow, opening his really quite pretty lips to say, “Something on my face?”

“Yes! No! Well, yes, your lips are on your face, I mean, your eyes are on your face! Eyes. I was looking at your eyes. And obviously there’s something on your face, don’t be stupid, Moony, there’s something on everyone’s face… eyes, nose, eyebrows…”

“Lips, too,” Remus added, and oh Merlin he was looking at Sirius’s lips and Sirius accidentally licked his lips and he was moving closer… and then he toppled off of his bed. Remus burst out laughing.

“Urgh, shuddup, Moonboy,” Sirius groaned, pitifully waving an arm at Remus to help him up. And Remus, with his supernatural werewolf strength, helped Sirius up, directly onto Remus’s bed. Then they were sitting face to face and Sirius began counting the little lines on Remus’s soft-looking lips, the ones forming delicate patterns over the pink flesh, and Sirius could reach out and touch them…

He stopped. His fingers were hovering directly in front of Remus’s lips. A millimetre more, and they would be touching. He quickly placed his hand on his lap, and firmly fixed his gaze to his lap as well.

“So,” Remus started conversationally. Sirius’s head snapped back up. Were they going to ignore that or…? Or. Sirius felt himself smirking at the blush on Remus’s face.

“So,” he echoed.

“I’m thinking.”

“Aw, don’t think too hard, you’ll get wrinkles over your perfect forehead.”

Remus glared at him, but with no real malice. “I’m thinking that…”

“You’re happily heterosexual and I should get out of this bed?” Sirius teased. “Ah, gotcha,” he began climbing out.

Remus grabbed his arm. “No!”

Sirius turned back to face him, easily sliding back in. He grinned, raising a brow. “You’re not happily heterosexual, and I should stay in this bed? Hmm, I agree, same.” He fluttered his eyelashes at Remus. “Say, can I kiss you?”

Remus kissed him. Sirius was right. Remus’s lips were soft and delicate and pretty, and he could feel the textures rubbing against his own as their lips moved against one another. He sucked Remus’s lower lip, and it was plump and perfect, then Remus licked his lower lip, and Sirius immediately opened his mouth, welcoming Remus inside as their tongues battled, danced, swirled around each other, all heat and moisture, burning Sirius up, but all he wanted was more.

They toppled over each other, and Sirius found himself looming over Remus, instantly attacking his lips again, lightly then roughly, and Remus mirrored it better than anyone else could. It was sloppy then firm, sexy then sweet, anything and everything. Remus let out a moan, Sirius a whine, and they pressed their chests closely together, closer, closer still, until the entirety of Sirius was touching Remus. He moved to pepper Remus’s jaw with feather-light kisses, his collarbone… and then Remus sat them back up, placed Sirius on his lap, kissed him sweetly, before ripping Sirius’s shirt of and trailing kisses from his mouth, down his bobbing Adam’s apple, along his chest, and Sirius gasped.

“Leave a mark,” he whispered hoarsely. “Actually, leave many marks.”

Remus looked up at him with hooded eyes and a smirk, before doing exactly that. Sirius ran a hand through Remus’s hair, and kissed the side of his face, then to his neck, sucking and biting until hickeys covered it. Then Remus pulled Sirius back to his lips, and they snogged some more, until they were completely out of breath.

“Damn,” Remus breathed over Sirius’s face.

“Yeah.”

“So.”

“So. That was fun.”

“Yeah. Do you want to stay here?”

“And fall asleep with you, Moony?” Sirius chuckled at Remus’s nervousness, kissing him on the nose. “Definitely.”

__________________

The next morning, James woke up with a blinding headache, and stumbled over to Remus’s bed for the hangover potion. But when he opened the curtains and saw Sirius and Remus curled up together, his hangover was miraculously cured. “YES!” He screeched, waking them both up with a jolt.

“THEY DID IT! WE HAVE TO THROW ANOTHER PARTY!” James yelled, skipping down the stairs.

Remus and Sirius shared a glance as the entire common room below them burst into cheers and applause.

“WHOOO,” a million voices cheered. “SIRIUS AND REMUS!”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

salespeople

“Hiya, how can I help?” Sirius asked into the speakerphone. An incoming customer call had been directed to him, and it was his duty to answer their queries knowledgeably, clear up any confusion, reassure them that sales were soaring; that investing wouldn’t result in a loss. He took his job as a salesperson for his adoptive family’s hair company with the utmost responsibility.

Usually, he never bothered with anything, always lazily half-hearted and thoughtlessly careless, but he’d always lived to please his family, and really, the hair product was incredible. Without it, he doubted he would have the long, smooth, silky dark hair he was currently brushing behind his ear.

“More like how can I help you?” An exaggeratedly cheerful voice responded, and Sirius sucked his teeth in, recoiling at the fake, saccharine voice, clearly doused in excessive gallons of honey, dripping with insincerity. He’s heard these sorts of people before, mainly a certain Gilderoy Lockhart, who literally poured buckets of honey down his speakerphone, ranting in disgustingly jovial tones about his own brilliance.

Well, at least this person wasn’t Gilderoy — by now, they’d have been at least ten thousand words into how blindingly gorgeous Gilderoy’s new nose job was. (A lie, by the way.) Gilderoy was the worst salesperson by far, not even advertising the product he was paid to publicise. Also, this person was a customer, not a salesperson, and they sounded extremely deranged, which meant Sirius had to help them all the more.

Before Sirius could speak, though, the voice awkwardly rushed in to fill the silence, “Because I have the perfect thing that will help you, not that you need helping, actually, I’m sure you’re, uh, pretty? But, well, I’m bad at this, look, just buy the damn product.”

Sirius blinked. Maybe this person was a salesperson? “Are you okay?”

“No. I’m drunk. I suck at my job. I don’t even care about hair! Oops, that rhymed. Anyway, I try to, but I sound so fake. Even alcohol doesn’t help. Like, in what world does alcohol not help?”

“Uh — none?”

“Exactly! Really, I just need the money. And not in a ‘all I care about is money kinda way’, but ‘cause I’m genuinely broke.”

“Uh.”

“Sorry. I’m trying to get you to buy out of pity. I heard honesty really sells it.”

“Right. Well, maybe start by telling me what your product is?”

The faint sound of a head hitting a table. “I’m an idiot, sorry. It’s ‘Potter’s Sleekeazy Hair Products’.”

Sirius slowly smiled, realisation dawning on him. With a smirk, Sirius Potter said, “I get those for free.”

“…What?”

“Name’s Sirius Potter.”

“Oh God.”

Sirius laughed. “Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble. What’s your name?”

“Are you going to fire me?” The voice asked bluntly.

“Nah, I’m not in charge of that.”

“But you’re related to the people who are?”

“Something like that.”

“So you have the power to get me fired.”

“And with the power I wield over you, I’d like you to tell me your name.”

“Remus,” the person sighed. “Remus Lupin.”

“Don’t sound so miserable, Remus,” Sirius said. “I told you, don’t worry.” With that, Sirius hung up, and decided to take his break, disconnecting from the centre so that no calls would be directed to him. He made a note to report the error of connecting two salespeople as well. He’d been informed that Remus was an incoming call, and Remus had probably been tasked with making an outgoing call. Actually, what if Remus, in his drunken daze, accidentally sent the wrong request? Maybe Sirius wouldn’t report it after all. Because in reality, despite Remus’s doubts, he didn’t want him fired. He actually wanted to befriend him. Which was strange, but Sirius didn’t question it.

He went on a Remus Lupin hunt, merely because Remus was interesting, crazy, weird, direct, stupid, awkward, funny; quite frankly, the most intriguing person Sirius had ever heard. And that was from his voice alone. Who knew what Remus would be like in person? He knew Remus would be at one of the desks in the Potter’s call centre, and blindly walked down the rows and columns of white desks until he saw the man’s name tag.

Remus was dolefully staring down at the headphones he’d taken off and placed on his desk, and he’d probably been doing that for a long time. His hair was awful: knotted, matted, scraggly, overgrown… and yet, the russet curls fell prettily into his eyes, and Sirius couldn’t make out the colour because of Remus’s insanely long eyelashes, hiding them from sight.

Sirius smiled amusedly at the sight, before pushing the headphones to the side of the desk and pulling himself up to sit there instead. Remus blinked up at him in confusion. Golden. The colour of his eyes. Molten, hot liquid, pure and radiant, swirling in his irises; a deep, rich shade of brown that was too shiny to be brown.

“Hiya,” Sirius grinned. “Got any more alcohol on you?”

Remus’s eyes widened in recognition, and he obediently opened a desk drawer and pulled out a huge bottle of vodka — which, concerningly, was already half-drunk. Sirius laughed. “Don’t be so stiff, mate, I’m not gonna attack you.”

“You’re the boss, though.”

“Nah, just one of his sons. I work the same as you, y’know. Salesperson.”

“Oh.”

“Cheers,” Sirius nodded, taking a swig of the bottle, letting out a sigh as his throat burned.

Remus’s lips twitched upward. “Usually, I don’t drink so visibly.”

Sirius gave him a levelled look. “I’m a Potter.”

“And that gives you superiority?”

“Yes,” Sirius stated, purposefully taking another sip. He grinned when Remus chuckled slightly, and then even more when Remus froze like a deer in headlights when he was caught.

“Loosen up, I thought you were drunk,” Sirius passed the bottle back.

Remus pursed his lips, before shrugging and taking a massive swig.

“Wow,” Sirius noted. “Really hate this job, huh?”

“Well.”

“Y’know, if you’re broke, how’d you afford the bottle?” Sirius gestured.

Remus grimaced at the impression it gave. A poor alcoholic who spent all his money on his poison. “I actually won it in a lottery. But my best mate was in charge, and I’m one hundred percent certain she rigged it in my favour.”

Sirius cackled. “You deserve it.”

“Clearly,” Remus responded dryly.

“You’re different now than on the phone,” Sirius observed. “You know Lockhart?” All Sirius needed was Remus’s answering grimace to say, “At first, you reminded me of him.”

“What?!” Remus coughed. “I hate everything. I knew it was bad, but not that bad.”

Sirius consolingly patted the top of Remus’s curls as he pathetically buried his face into his elbows, splayed all knobbly and gangly over the desk. “Aw, it’s okay,” Sirius jokingly cooed. “Honestly, you redeemed yourself greatly. So adorable, you were. And I think you called me pretty, at one point in that ramble. And you hadn’t even seen me! I’m touched.”

“You’re still pretty,” Remus mumbled into his sleeve, and Sirius raised his eyebrows.

“So are you,” he whispered.

Remus finally raised his head in comical confusion, but before those lovely lips could form the words asking him to elaborate, Sirius continued in a louder voice, “Well, I won’t fire you, but we’re gonna find you a job you care about. Because, although your hair is beautiful, you clearly don’t give a shit about looking after it.”

_____________________

Three years later, Sirius was the boss of Potter’s Sleekeazy Hair Products, his parents having made the decision to retire early and enjoy their remaining years as much as possible. And, it was clear that Sirius was made for the job.

After closing up the office, he skipped down the sidewalk, and rounded the corner of the cobbled street to face the monstrous, arched building, looming over him intimidatingly with its intricate traceries and age-old, weathered bricks. But it didn’t intimidate him, because it was the second home of his partner, who spent his hours poring over dusty pages of ancient volumes, or writing new pages to fill spaces in bookstores for people of all ages.

They’d found the job together, exploring dreams and hopes and ambitions, and dreaming and hoping and striving even more to make it work. And it worked. Because now Remus Lupin was a bestselling author and university lecturer, and he only drank alcohol when he wasn’t working. Oh, and his hair was even more breathtaking, because every week, his partner conditioned it with a new, specially-designed Potter’s Sleekeazy Conditioning Serum.

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse

[moutainrusing]

time travel

Time travel wasn’t that complicated. The machine looked like a large microwave, really. Instead of putting food in it, you put yourself in it, and instead of heating you up, it sent you to a different day. Simple. Not scary. Although it seemed too simple, and that in itself was terrifying. Sirius was trusting this machine with his life, and it looked like a bloody microwave. How could he be sure it would really serve its time travelling purpose and not cause his organs to stew in his blood?

He should probably conduct some tests on it; ensure it worked properly, except that would require even more patience and effort. He felt akin to a mad scientist, maniacally sleep-deprived, staring at the horrific invention he’d spent the last two years designing, contemplating whether or not it functioned, and deciding with a final dismissive,  borderline-berserk grin, ‘Who gives a shit if my creation destroys the planet?!’

With that, he punched the numbers into the keypad, in the same way he’d instruct a microwave how long to warm a plate for, and he stepped inside. A low thrumming vibrated through his veins, with a constant rhythm, one he wished he’d known since birth because it was indescribably everything. The engine of a bus. The buzzing of a bee. Sounds which others would find irritating, but made Sirius feel at home in his skin, alive and thriving; easy. He was almost sad when the sound cut off, indicating his arrival.

But he was now where he’d always wanted to be. He was back. He stepped out, and he saw everything he’d left behind, because he was stupid and careless and arrogant and stubborn and cruel and self-deprecating and selfish and just… awful. Not anymore.

He saw his past self walking away. Not knowing that in three years, he would end up where he was right now. He would brush past his past self and sprint in the opposite direction, almost flying, like a bird re-learning how to use the wings he’d tried to hack off. He would get on the bus and feel the engine, a heart beating in time with his own. He would get off at the meadow where the bees flitted between flowers in childish games of hide-and-seek. And on the evening of March eleventh, instead of running away, he would be there, and say, “I’m sorry.”

The man, who was sitting cross-legged in the grass, with soft brown curls haloed by the sun, glowing bright and incandescent, turned around. Sirius felt like he’d been struck. He hadn’t seen those glowing, golden eyes in three years. But the man had seen Sirius just yesterday. Well, he’d seen past Sirius, the Sirius from three years ago, the Sirius who ruined his twenty-fifth birthday by drinking too much and punching anyone who tried to take his glass, who disregarded his soothing words with cold sneers and bitter remarks, who wanted to distance himself from the man he was disastrously in love with with by using him as a punching bag. That Sirius was supposed to meet up with him in the meadow the next day, as they did every Sunday, except that Sirius was a coward. He didn’t do it then. But he would do it now.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, loudly, sincerely, brokenly.

Remus blinked at him. “I didn’t think you’d show,” he murmured.

Sirius felt guilt wrap emaciated fingers around his lungs and squeeze. Remus was right. He didn’t show. But it was because, “I didn’t think you’d show.”

“Looks like we were both wrong.” No. Remus was right. He was always right. Sirius forced a laugh. Then silence. He couldn’t help but be glad for the bees, and their pleasant white noise. Remus felt the same; that’s why they both loved the meadow. But the Sirius back then didn’t know what love was.

“Can I— can I sit?” Sirius asked, gesturing to the space beside Remus.

Remus nodded. Sirius didn’t know what to say. “I’m sorry.”

Remus smiled. “I forgave you ages ago.”

“You shouldn’t have. I’m a dickhead.”

“I know. But I still forgive you.”

“You’re so stupid.”

“Do you not want forgiveness?”

“You forgive too easily.”

Remus hummed. “Want me to make it hard?”

Sirius coughed. “No,” he replied pointedly. “Not yet anyway,” he finished quietly.

Remus smirked. He probably heard that. He had stupidly supernatural senses. Remus shrugged, and said, “You look like you’ve aged by ten years.”

As a matter of fact, it was three years, but he supposed he did look rather haggard and bony, with ink-stains beneath his blood-shot eyes, tangled hair. He felt ugly. He felt like the version of himself he needed Remus to see. And then he felt Remus rubbing a thumb below his left eye, and brushing a knotty strand of hair behind his ear, whispering, “What happened, Sirius?”

“I grew up,” Sirius replied wryly.

“Doesn’t look like growing up. Looks like dying.”

Sirius swallowed. “It’s what I am without you.”

Remus laughed. “How sweet,” he rolled his eyes. “Be honest, what’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Let it go.”

“No.”

Remus let out a frustrated huff. “Okay. Why not?”

“Because. I was evil.”

“You weren’t, you were Sirius.”

“Are you saying I can’t be anything but Sirius? Are you denying me my right to be whatever I want? Remus? Are you?” Sirius leaned over Remus’s head with raised brows. Remus snorted and swatted him away.

“What if I am?”

“That is a violation of my human rights. I’m reporting you to Ms Evans.”

“Lily does not give a shit about human rights.”

“I don’t give a shit about Lily not giving a shit.”

“I thought you wanted her to give a shit?”

“I want you to give a shit!”

“Fine, I’ll give a shit.” Remus paused. “What am I giving a shit about again?”

“My human rights!”

“Okay, Sirius, I give a shit about your human rights.”

“Thank you. Now, I was evil yesterday, and you can’t say I wasn’t, or else you’re disrespecting me.”

Remus flicked him. “So many obligations.”

Sirius flicked him back. “I’m sorry for ruining your birthday.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did!”

Remus rolled his eyes. “You’re not the only thing my birthday consisted of. There were other people, who in fact made it a very lovely day.”

The Sirius back then would be burning with possessive jealousy, scowling and sulking, thinking Remus didn’t care at all. But the present Sirius knew that wasn’t true. It was good to rely on a solid group of close companions; to have many friends instead of obsessively focusing on only one. It was necessary to have a balance, important to know you could trust in different people, communicate in different ways, be independent and confident. So he simply nodded, and stated, “That’s good. I’m glad they did, ‘cause I didn’t.”

Remus eyed him, as if he was surprised. Sirius grinned internally. He was getting better. Remus smiled, and said, “You were having an off day.”

“I’m sorry I took it out on you.”

“It’s okay. I understand.”

“But you don’t.”

Remus raised a brow. “Everyone has off days. It doesn’t represent them.”

“I’ve been having so many off days. Isn’t it getting too much?”

“You’re not having an off day now,” Remus pointed out. “I know you’re good.”

Sirius scoffed. “Right, it was good of me to call you a bitch and tell you no girl would ever love you ‘cause you’re so awkward and lanky?”

Remus shrugged. “I don’t want any girl to love me.”

“That’s the problem! I used your insecurities against you! And you fucking believe it! Well, I’m sorry, but everyone who’s good loves you. You’re so gentle and soft and loveable. And you’re not bloody awkward! You carry it off like you’re sweet, but in your head, you’re thinking, ‘Oh God, I hate people. Wait, should I smile and nod?’ And then you do just that, and everyone swoons. And then you open up, and you loosen up, and you turn out to be so fucking quick. Like, you have a response to everything. How can that be awkward? And you’re not lanky! You’re tall, and quite frankly, I’m jealous. So that’s why. I was jealous of you.” Sirius finally paused for breath. That was the first reason. There was more.

Remus smiled. “Don’t be. Even when you look like death, you’re bloody hot.”

Sirius felt heat rush to his cheeks, and he quashed it immediately. Just a joke between mates. That’s what all mates did. He winked, and said, “Are you hitting on me, Remus?”

“Yes.” Remus deadpanned.

“Violating my human rights,” Sirius sang.

“My bad,” Remus held his hands up in surrender. “Meant to say you look as fine as a Michelangelo painting.”

“Such a gentleman,” Sirius fake-swooned to cover up his very real swooning. “Honestly, ladies are head-over-heels for you.”

“Don’t want them to be.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“No—”

“No, I am. Yesterday I said you didn’t deserve love. But you do, Remus, you deserve all the love in the world. Let people love you, please. And I only said it because I was mad at how much I love you. Almost like you forced me into it with how fucking perfect you are. It’s inescapable, loving you. And I don’t know why I tried. I was stupid. I love loving you. I’d do it forever.”

Remus smiled. “I love you too, tosser.”

“No, you don’t get it. I haven’t finished. How can you love someone who did all of that?”

“Because. You also do all of this.”

“Right, and that’s enough to counter the fact that I didn’t love you properly? I didn’t treat you like I loved you. To be honest, I didn’t know what love was. I just wanted to be close to you, and it was weird and wrong and terrifying, so I did the opposite. And I’m sorry, because I love you so much, and I know it now.”

Remus furrowed his brows. “Not that I don’t appreciate it, but how did you grow up so much in one night?”

Sirius sighed. “Well… it’s actually been three years.”

“…What?”

“Three years,” Sirius confirmed. “I’m sorry. You were right. I didn’t show. Not at first. I ran off for a year. I made a friend, actually. He got my head outta my ass. James. I’ll have to find him again, actually. Promised him. Anyway, I realised I lost you, and I knew it was too late, but I also knew I’d do anything to get you back. So… we built a time machine! Took two years. And then I came back to find you. So I wouldn’t lose you. Because I’m better now.”

Remus squinted. “Is this a prank?”

Sirius shook his head. “I solemnly swear,” he said, holding out his pinky finger for their childhood promise, the one which meant that no matter what, they were telling the truth. Remus gingerly took it, mind whirring so loudly Sirius could hear it. He wanted to bottle it up with the rest of his favourite sounds and play them on repeat.

Finally, Remus recovered, and burst out, “Sirius. You are a fucking idiot. The only good thing you got out of doing all that was James, actually. You could never lose me. I would have let you back in at any time. The Remus of your time would have let you back in easily.”

“I wasn’t in contact with you anymore. We’d lost each other. And I missed your twenty-sixth and twenty-seventh birthdays! I’m here for those now.”

“You’re mental. So, what, you’re twenty-eight then?”

“Yeah. I am so much older and wiser than you. More than I was before, y’know.”

“Mental.”

“Do you need some time?”

“Yes. But not three fucking years.”

Sirius winced. “I’m sorry.”

“You know you don’t need to say that.”

“Yes, I do. It makes you forgiving me look more valid, otherwise you look pathetic, forgiving someone who’s not even sorry.”

“Mental.”

“Get a wider vocabulary.”

Remus was silent. “Well, I missed your twenty-sixth, twenty-seventh, and twenty-eighth birthdays!”

“I forgive you.”

“I didn’t say sorry yet.”

“I don’t mind looking pathetic.”

“Idiot.”

“Hmm, better than just ‘mental’, but still: wider vocabulary.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

There was another silence, where Sirius let go, basking in the evening sun, not too hot but not too cold, orange light washing over his face. It really was home. And he didn’t care if this was dramatic, or mental, or idiotic. Why?

“Why?” Remus finally said, echoing his thoughts.

Sirius sucked in a breath. He supposed it was time to come completely clean. “You know how I said I love you? Well, I’m… in love with you. And it’s okay, I know the love between us is platonic, I just—”

“You’re an idiot.”

“Widen your vocabulary.”

“It’s kind of hard to think when you’re in front of me.”

“So… we’re still friends then?”

“Yeah. But, also, can we be a couple?”

“You mean… you want to date me? Exclusively?”

Remus firmly nodded.

Sirius felt his mind spin. And he whispered, “Yes,” like it was sacred. He pressed his forehead against Remus’s, and breathed him in, watching in awe as his eyelashes fluttered shut, grazing his skin like feathers, casting long, thin shadows.

“I’m in love with you too.”

____________________________

“Hey, we need to find James,” Sirius told Remus.

“Definitely. He’s the one who made you into the man I love, after all.”

“Please don’t cheat on me with him.”

“Daft sod, I loved you before you even met him. But I must say, he really was a good influence.”

“That depends. I think current me influenced him to influence past me, who then became current me, so we’ll never know if I influenced him or he influenced me.”

“What?”

“Well, we’re gonna go find him now, but he hasn’t met past Sirius yet. So when I see him now, he’ll be like ‘What the fuck?’ and I’ll be like, ‘Teach this man this’, and he’ll be like, ‘Why should I?’ and I’ll be like, ‘I’ll be your brother forever’, and he’ll be like, ‘I’m in’.”

Remus blinked. “Mental.”

“That’s time travel, for you.”

Microfic Compilation by MountainRuse