mycroftrh

[mycroftrh]

Hi, I’m Bob!

(And Sentry and Void)

[mycroftrh]

can i say something

[mycroftrh]

I’m going to gently file this one under “questions asked by people who grew up in a less homophobic era than I did”. (And I’m glad they did, that’s what we were fighting for.)

If the creator or something explicitly states they don’t want two characters shipped will you respect it?

[mycroftrh]

Petty writing peeve of the day: the words “pants” and “torch”

For anyone who does not know, “torch” in the US means “stick with fire on the end”; “torch” in the UK means “flashlight (electric portable lighting device)”. And “pants” in the US means “trousers” but in the UK means “underwear”.

Most differences between British English vs American English are more or less okay when you’re writing because everyone, like, knows what you meant, yeah? Even if they don’t happen to know that particular term they can at least tell that they don’t know it, like, that it’s a Foreign Word and try to guess what it means from context

Like if I say “they got in the elevator” a Brit is gonna go “ah yes, they got in the lift” and if I say “Meet in the car park?” an American’s gonna go “huh? oh, that probably means the parking lot”

But the problem! With “pants” and “torch”! Is that a) these words mean different things on different sides of the pond AND b) the things they mean are adjacent enough that context will not clue you in that something’s funky here

If I say “the cave was dark. he pulled a torch from his bag” a Brit is gonna go “yeah that checks out” but an American is gonna go “wait hang on I thought we were in the modern day. is this more of a fantasy setting than I realized? is it a magic torch? did I miss worldbuilding??” so if I’ve got British characters I either have to be Inaccurate and use a word they would not use, or deeply confuse my American readers

And fuckin PANTS!!

Depending on scenario I can either end up with my British readers thinking my character is prancing about in public with naught but some cartoon red hearts between his dick and the air, or (and funnily enough, this one is actually the way about I have had the biggest issue, which probably says something about who I am as a writer) I can end up with Americans going “yeah, he’s wearing jeans or slacks or whatever, what’s the biggie” when I meant to convey that my character was trying to act nonchalant while very obviously caught in flagrante de-dick-to.

It’s an ISSUE

[mycroftrh]

the gist of this idea me and @khyeili have been screwing around with is that tony is having a bad time. everyone thinks he's transphobic now just because he's deeply annoyed by captain america

[mycroftrh]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Dead Boy Detectives (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Edwin Paine | Edwin Payne/Charles Rowland Characters: Edwin Paine | Edwin Payne, Charles Rowland (DCU) Additional Tags: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Time Loop, Dissociation, Protective Edwin Paine | Edwin Payne, Self-sacrificing Edwin Paine | Edwin Payne, Pre-Relationship, Edwin Payne Messes With Forces He Shouldn’t, Time Travel Fix-It, Please read the opening author’s note

Charles was not quite back, yet, from dealing with his part of the Case of the Wibbling Wiedergänger, and Edwin lay down on the floor in the office to wait.  He had long since lost any capacity to track time while experiencing it, so he didn’t really know how long it was before Charles phased through the door.

He did know that when he looked up he saw the most beautiful thing in the universe.  He hadn’t fully realized how different the Charles of 1989 was from his Charles, or how long it had been since he had seen his Charles, but the weight of all those years hit him like the most joyful agony he had ever experienced.

[Time Loop Angst 😁 ]

[mycroftrh]

Of course Ace doesn’t have a Kryptonite collar, that would be wildly irresponsible - what if he and a heroic Krypton native needed to be in the same place at the same time? Or, what, were you suggesting that he only have Kryptonite if Batman happens to put on the collar, leaving him unprotected from rogue Kryptonians at all other times? That’s animal endangerment, Kal, for heavens’ sake

He has Kryptonite in his utility harness in a lead compartment with a voice-activated maglock that he can trigger by growling at the right pitch. Obviously 🙄

Texts From Superheroes

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[mycroftrh]

Saw Superman yesterday and got this!

The newspaper with Krypto comes out and you can flip it around for a Superman headline

It’s also a lot bigger than it looks in the pic, that’s why I put the (pretty tall) cup for scale

You can actually put a coin in the 25c coin slot

And the place where you get a paper opens and you can store stuff 😁 and there’s a pile of newspapers painted on the bottom of the interior

[mycroftrh]

I am amused by the various people who have tagged/commented on this pointing out the kinky Obikin implications in a tone that suggests I had somehow missed them or even would disapprove of them

My friends, just because I choose to write canon-aligned meta that is accessible for a general audience does not mean I am blind and deaf. I know what I said

There is an absolutely fascinating moment in the Obi-Wan and Padme and Anakin confrontation on Mustafar that I kinda want to spin like three full-length fics off of.

Anakin’s Force-choking Padme. Obi-Wan orders him: “Let her go! Let her go, Anakin!” and Anakin - Anakin who has already pledged fealty to Darth Sidious, who has already embraced the Dark Side, who has disclaimed loyalty to Obi-Wan - obeys the command.

He genuinely doesn’t seem to drop Padme because he’s processed yet what he’s doing; it really does look like he’s instinctively obeying Obi-Wan’s orders even when he’s fully off his rocker, out of his mind from everything from accumulated trauma to elemental-evil-exposure, and has officially denounced any hierarchical relationship between them.

And there is SO much to be unpacked there.

I’m guessing that what’s going on, for the most part, is a decade of conditioning as Obi-Wan’s Padawan (and subsequent years as his partner-but-subordinate) to follow his orders reflexively. Combined with Anakin’s overall instinct to obedience, trained into him by everyone from Watto to the Council to Palpatine. And that’s so powerful it overrides everything else, when even Anakin’s protectiveness of Padme couldn’t break through it. Underneath it all, he's still more Padawan than Sith Lord, at an instinctual level.

(It’s not the only time obedience to Obi-Wan takes precedence over the protectiveness of Padme that is otherwise his driving trait, by the way; Obi-Wan orders him to leave her alone and injured in Attack of the Clones and follow Obi-Wan instead of rescuing her and, though he argues a bit, he obeys.)

And what does it say, too, that that’s what Obi-Wan defaulted to? He considers Anakin a brother, at this point, sees them as equals in many ways. But in an urgent situation, he doesn’t plead or reason - he barks an order expecting to be obeyed. Because, in the end, he is a Master, and Anakin never was. And all the weight Anakin gives that fact? The near-meltdown he has about it in the Council chamber? He’s not getting that from nowhere.

In an AU, if Obi-Wan had, instead of fighting him, said “Anakin, I’m going to take over the Republic now and you’re going to be my attack dog. Sit. Stay. Now bite.” Would that have worked? Based on both this scene and how frequently Anakin offers to betray Palpatine for other people so they can rule the Empire in Palpatine’s stead with Anakin as their iron fist, it seems likely!

[mycroftrh]

Roger Lancelyn Green plus a second on D’Aulaire.

…plus you do not want to know how young I was when I started carrying around Plato’s Republic everywhere for whenever I needed a backup book to reread, because I thought the worldbuilding on Kallipolis/Utopia was really fun.

people who learned about greek mythology due reasons that DONT involve having read percy jackson at 12 freak me out, like what the FUCK was going on in your life that you found out that zeus turned into a pigeon to woo his wife like HOW

[mycroftrh]

I will freely state that I am a grown adult and I have seen the options, and having done so I no longer choose to spend my precious free time watching or reading about normal people doing normal things in a normal fashion. if I wanted to hear about normal people being normal I could go gossip with Sheryl from the fourth floor

[mycroftrh]

It never does stop being hilarious to me that Kilgarrah keeps talking about a “young boy” and then they show you the “young boy” and it’s a grown-ass man with a job and taxes and a 100% adult social circle played by a 26 year old

Like not that Colin Morgan wasn’t Youthful but the Ancient Thousand Year Old Dragon insisting every episode that he’s telling you a story about a baby boy. baby. a toddler. and then showing you An Entire Adult Both In-Universe And Out is so hecking funny

[mycroftrh]

I want a fic where murderbot has to act human around another Secunit who's 10000% convinced that it's human and needs immediate rescue

[mycroftrh]

You ever think about how at least three of the Bats saw Dick’s parents die?

Like… Alfred shared Bruce’s grief for Thomas and Martha, and depending on who you ask, Jim and/or Alfred may have seen them in the alley. But their actual death - the way their blood sprayed, their screams, their fear, the light going out - Bruce is the only person who holds those memories.

Tim and Jason, their parents’ deaths were their loss alone. Bruce saw the aftermath of some of it, but not the deaths; and no one else felt any of the shock or the pain of it. Their pain is private.

But Dick? He has two entire family members, a brother and a father, who met him on the same day they saw his parents die. Whose foundational memory of him includes his family splattering across the floor. Who at a certain age must surely start looking at his face and seeing his father’s broken skull.

They don’t share his grief, but they do share that memory, and that’s probably the worst of all worlds, actually.

[mycroftrh]

Hmm. Nonbinary Dick very, very nervously, and against all recommendations from Wayne Enterprises’ PR team, arriving for a gala in a drapey dark blue evening gown and makeup and tasteful expensive jewelry.

Tim tells him he’s the hottest person there by miles (accurately) and everyone giving him the side-eye is jealous. Cass offers to beat up a transphobic old lady. (Well, not with her words, but her point is clear.) Damian helped him with the eyeshadow and pronounced the result far superior to Talia’s.

Which is all lovely, but the one person that matters most is of course fashionably late. And when Bruce finally arrives, drawing the eyes of every person in the room, of course -

Dick locks eyes with him across the crowd, and Bruce freezes. His face goes dark, and he turns around, and walks out.

The eyeshadow ends up smudged - no tear tracks, because Dick isn’t a crybaby, dammit, he doesn’t care what Bruce thinks, Bruce is an asshole anyway, if he cared what Bruce thought he wouldn’t have gotten anywhere in life, the most important rule of being Robin is not caring what Bruce thinks. And he doesn’t.

But the dress ends up torn when it’s taken off too quickly to change into the Nightwing costume after Dick leaves far too early to go beat people up - to save Gotham, that is. Unrelated to Bruce.

Because he doesn’t care about Bruce, or what Bruce thinks, he doesn’t go to the Manor for several days.

Eventually Alfred shows up at his apartment, and Dick sighs. Because of course Alfred does. If Dick isn’t available to clean up Bruce’s messes, then Alfred does it. And vice versa. But he can’t not let Alfred in, so he opens the door and offers tea and some butternut squash soup.

Alfred politely waits a full ten minutes before getting to the point.

“I thought you should see these.”

He holds out a folder. Dick takes it obediently and suppresses another sigh. There are two photographs, inside.

The first is an evidence photo: a pearl necklace, just like the one Dick had tossed in the back of his locker after the gala, the pearls scattered across an alley, some dipped in blood, and the evidence label, with a date. A date Dick knows almost as well as the date of the last performance of the Flying Graysons.

And the second is a woman Dick knows very well, from paintings, and photographs, but in this photograph she has a drapey dark blue evening gown, and carefully applied eyeshadow, and a pearl necklace. And crystal blue eyes, and black hair, and sharp cheekbones, and…

Oh.

“You looked beautiful, Master Dick. And so did she.”

[mycroftrh]

Bruce, gripping Wonder Woman’s lasso, the other end of which is around his former sidekick’s waist: Tim. Tell the truth.

Tim: Okay, sure. So what happened that morning was -

Dick: Yeah, that’s not gonna work. Try this one.

Bruce, gripping Donna’s Lasso of Persuasion, the other end of which is around Tim’s waist: Tell the whole truth.

Tim, rolling his eyes: Fine. As I was saying, you need some context, but -

Bruce: Tell nothing but the truth.

Tim: Hmm. Yeah, okay. So… The night before, we ran into the Scarecrow, and -

Bruce, eye twitching: Do not imply anything other than the truth.

Tim: Jeez, fine. Well, Kon was pretty injured, but we -

Bruce: Do not present emotional interpretations that do not align with the truth! Or any other kind of misleading interpretation!

Tim, visibly thinking: Don’t… present… Yeah, I can do that. Anyway, as I keep trying to tell you…

Dick: Oh my GOD. How the hell are you even planning to get around that one?

Tim, shrugging: I was gonna go with focusing your attention on the wrong parts of the story, and some poorly presented statistics and graphs as backup. Manipulate the axes, the zero-point, the units, the p-values. You know. The works.

Bruce and Dick, blinking:

Tim: What, did you expect me not to answer that question? I’m under a truth compulsion. Look. [gesturing with his hand] Lassoes.

[mycroftrh]

Another HC of mine is that Dick used joint naps as a sort of time-out for Damian since it both reinforced trust and got the kid to take a break. At first it worked as an actual punishment, because it was pretty much Damian watching Dick sleep for an hour... until Damian started to really trust Dick.

Damian has grown to love required naptime; Napping With Papa is his favorite activity now and, of course, his brain dictates Dick can never know this, so he never asks to take a nap and instead strategically acts out until Dick makes him take a nap.

Damian: "-and that is reason number twenty-four why I should be allowed to inflict bodily harm on whomever I choose. Reason number twenty five is-"

Dick: "Wow okay, I didn't know you could be this annoying."

Damian, snapping: "Do not interrupt me!"

Dick: "What has you so cranky anyway? Did you get much sleep?"

Damian, perking up: "My sleep has nothing to do with this."

Dick: "Yeah, no, it sounds like you need some sleep. Let's take a nap."

Damian, flatly: "Drat. I hate this."

Also Damian: "Just to be clear, are we using your room or mine? I'd prefer yours because the scent of your shampoo has rubbed off on the pillows and I think it has a calming effect on me. We will do your room. I will bring my Robin blanket, I think it has a calming effect on me as well. Also please hum when we are napping, it makes me feel like a kitten, not that the feeling is good. It's just a thing... A thing I have not felt since I was three years old if I recall."

Dick:

Dick: "...Correct me if I'm wrong, but I get the feeling you like taking naps with me."

Damian: "You are incorrect in that notion, I do not care for the practice." *Latches onto Dick's sleeve and starts dragging him upstairs* "Now can we please take a nap already? This was your idea after all!"

Damian, bundled in his Robin blanket, cradled by Dick: "...This is the worst. I love you."

Dick: "What was that?"

Damian: "Nothing. You're hearing things... I love you."

Dick:

Damian:

Dick: "...I love you too, kiddo."

Damian, eyes wet: "I don't recall asking."