numberonetrashwitch - Tumblr blog

[numberonetrashwitch]

A cock-blocking AI.... we are the future.

[numberonetrashwitch]

excuse me, what?

(Don't ask what we did. DON'T.)

[numberonetrashwitch]

White haired men with trauma

My bf just made some dumb joke about Kakashi from Naruto, i mentioned that i -who hates anime - know who this is bc a friend of mine is into him and it lead to: oh yeah this reminds me of my obsession with Astarion

it's the white-haired men with trauma thing, but, if you think about it there are more men that fit the stereotypical narrative of sexual/romantical attraction

classics are: Alucard, Sephirot, Dante, Geralt the Witcher, Percy from Vox Machina

but what about the men who aren't classically attractive? Vesemir, Saruman & Gandalf, the Ice king from adventure time, Elminster, Iroh from Avatar, Whitebeard from One piece

... they are all self-sacrificial cornerstones of the story, appreciated by their own fan community.

[numberonetrashwitch]

As promised, the Astarion/Tav/Halsin ;) [AO3]

THANK YOU SO MUCH <3 IM GOING TO DEVOUR

[numberonetrashwitch]

Life update

sooooo

i am still writing on that chapter, but my best friend got married .. and with traveling and all i couldn't do much

[numberonetrashwitch]

[numberonetrashwitch]

Sorry no update for today, i found an Astarion chatbot and my brain is now mush.

I promise i continue tomorrow but damn.

[numberonetrashwitch]

OH THIS IS SOOOO GOOD

Astarion finds a magic mirror that shows his reflection, but when he touches it he is pulled through. He has swapped places with a version of himself who completed the ascension ritual. He meets vampire spawn Tav, who realizes Astarion is no longer their master. Astarion learns exactly the kind of monster the ascension would have turned him into.

[numberonetrashwitch]

Well he certainly has a long period of trauma between his old self and his new one. I think it's very funny that Astarion (by one translation) basically means noble + mercury (as in the metal and it's qualities or) Mercury as in the God? The god of shepherds, merchants, travelers, thieves and (arcane?) tricksters. Ruler of the realm of communication, eloquence, boundaries, luck, trickery, and financial gain. He is also a slim build, and Mercury has often been depicted with short curly hair & as a messanger to the underworld.

So while not neccessarly good or evil, i think his very image is one of trickery for some kind of gain / using his voice /speech - but i think he was never as jaded before he died. Certainly learning law makes you see the worst in people sometimes, but i think he at least tried to do good.

I don't care what anybody says I can bet my ass Astarion was a fantastic magistrate

[numberonetrashwitch]

i'm sorry, but i am terribly obsessed with astarion's ears

and like, dont get me started on his bright-eyed smile

[numberonetrashwitch]

More tasteful Astarion nudes ✨

[numberonetrashwitch]

Astarion fans who dislike his story:

[numberonetrashwitch]

Yup. I did it. I put my whole p*ssy into this part of the fic and know i need a cigarette, a forehead kiss and a promise that none of you tell my therapist about this shit.

Me: discussing the next chapter of my Wyllstarion fanfic my Boyfriend: And that's how you turn Jill into Wyll

[numberonetrashwitch]

Me: discussing the next chapter of my Wyllstarion fanfic my Boyfriend: And that's how you turn Jill into Wyll

[numberonetrashwitch]

Please consider reblogging for a larger sample size

*For clarification for "rep" I just mean anything people look for representation. This could be a character who's neurodivergent/trans/gnc/person of color/etc.

[numberonetrashwitch]

I need to see something.

Please reblog this and put in the tags if the surname "Donner" means anything to you (without looking it up first), and if it does, give one or two words that describe what you know. Please also include where you grew up, including the state if you grew up in the US.

[numberonetrashwitch]

Either this is my best idea yet or my worst.

im literally trying to do something so sweet and so dumb it's rotting my teeth and somehow i want to just dig my claws in and rip it apart

UGH. Why can't i be normal about THEM? I am literally sitting here with 2 google docs open and giggling, kicking my feet and it's driving me insane. Call it experimental writing but it's just a little ... treat. For the reader.