pro-mogai-trans-blog

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Abrosexual Question

So a transmed reblogged my post with a question I think is a good one. 

{Abrosexual - A fluid sexuality. You may feel only attration to men on day, and then the next few days they are pan. They can be fluid between gay, hetero, pan, omni, ace, aro, etc.; anything}

How can an abrosexual have a solid romantic attraction if their sexuality keeps changing? Won’t they only sometimes be attracted to their partner?

Just because ones attraction changes, doesn’t mean we won’t still be into out partner. Many times, we fell in love with our partner, not because of their gender, but because of their personality. And for an abrosexual, their sexual attraction may change, but their romantic attraction might not. 

Even if their romantic attrition changed from being pan to hetero, and their partner is the same gender as them, it won’t change their romantic attraction for that person. They just won’t have the ability to find others of that gender romantically, sexually or both attracted. Unless they did fall in love with their partner strictly because of their gender, which I doubt many people do. 

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AFAB feminine enby =/= cis

How many times do I have to say this.

Girlflux AFAB people are not cis.

Boyflux AMAD people are not cis.

Librafeminine AFAB people are not cis.

Libramasculine AMAB peole are not cis. 

People with a feminine gender/s who are AFAB are not cis.

People with a masculine gender/s who are AMAB are not cis.

Yes, I can see why it may be confusing, so just listen.

Someone who is female, may identify femininely, and not be a woman. Woman is not the only feminine gender. If they identify as any gender other then woman, even if it may be feminine, are not cisgender (and same with masculine AMAB people).

Some may call themselves cisgender, and there is nothing wrong with that, but do not assume!

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Orientation Wiki pt.1 Abrosexual & Abroromantic

Abrosexuality and abroromanticism is defined as a fluid, fluctuating and fluix orientation. 

Someone who is abrosexual may be attracted to only men, but then later the week, they may only be attracted to women, and not at all to men. They may change and be fluid between different sexualities. 

This is often seen as “being unsure” or “another word for questioning” but that is not true. 

While someone may be unsure, this is a valid and stand alone orientation. 

The flags are so pretty and remind me of watermelons!

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NPD & Self DX?

I’m sorry that this is not LGBTQIA+ related but I just want to talk about this.

NPD stands for narcissistic personality disorder. 

I’ve done research about this and found many lists of traits, most of which I have. I also have genetics to back it up, as my father is professionally diagnosed with ASPD (sociopath) and my mother doesn’t feel any empathy. 

Here are the common traits of those with NPD. 

{Bold means yes, I fully experience this. Italic means yes, I sort of experience this / 50/50 / partly / almost.}

An insatiable appetite for the attention of others

Extreme feelings of jealousy

An expectation of special treatment

Exaggerating achievements, talents, and importance

Extreme sensitivity and a tendency to be easily hurt and to feel rejected with little provocation

Difficulty maintaining healthful relationships

Fantasizing about their own intelligence, success, power, and appearance

An ability to take advantage of others to achieve a goal, without regret or conscience

A lack empathy, or ability to understand and share the feelings of others, and a tendency to disregard others' feelings

A belief that only certain people can understand their uniqueness

A tendency to consider themselves as skilled in romance

Responding to criticism with anger, humiliation, and shame

Seeking out praise and positive reinforcement from others

An expectation that others will agree with them and go along with what they want

Whatever they crave or yearn for must be "the best”

I very much identify with “responding to criticism with anger, humiliation and shame” and “a tendency to consider themselves skinned in romance”, more then the other traits. 

I am a writer and an artist, so I should be used to criticism. But I’m not. I know that criticism is helpful and is made for learning, but I get embarrassed and defensive when someone criticizes me. I hate criticism, even though I know criticism is for the better. 

And I’ve never been in a romantic relationship, and I don’t really know anything about romance. But I give romantic advice to people all the time. I even lost a best friend that I had strong romantic, spiritual and sensual attraction to because I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. 

I found this list of things that you must have to have NPD, and I have all but one, and have experience one partly. 

The patient's idea and importance of self is exaggerated.

Fantasies about beauty, success, and power dominate the individual's thoughts.

The person thinks they are special, and relate only to other "special" people.

They need to be admired all the time.

They believe they are entitled to most things.

They manipulate and take advantage of others.

They lack empathy, the ability to feel and recognize the feelings and needs of others.

They envy other people.

Their behavior appears haughty or arrogant.

I don’t want to self-DX, but I want to label it. 

I don’t know if I should self-DX, but I think I would feel better if I had a label for what I’m experiencing. 

What should I do? Should I self-DX, should I not?

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What’s the point of labels?

I see this question all the time.

“Whats the point of labels? Microlabels just make things more complicated.”

“There’s no need for more then a few labels. Just use one or two labels.”

And there are a few big reasons why people use microlabels, or may use many labels. I can speak from personal experience, as I use 24 labels for my orientation!

1. Microlabels let people be specific. 

Not all people care about being specific, or a simple labels like gay or bi is specific enough for them. But sometimes hetero, bi, gay, pan or omni are not specific enough. 

Someone may have also have split attraction. They may be heterosexual, panromantic and andro-aesthetic. They may be conformable with just being called panromantic, but some people may not feel comfortable with that label, or don’t feel represented in just that one label. 

Labels are a type of expression and representation. Someone may not feel like the word “bisexual” represents their full attraction. They may feel like their sexuality is fluid, flux, free, spiritual, etc. and that is not “traditionally represented in the word bisexual. They may feel like the word bisexual is restricting, may give people a false idea about them if they use bisexual. 

Some people feel comfort in having one label and like not being specific (or feel like one label is specific enough), but some people fine comfort in microlabels. 

This is the same for gender labels. “Transman” may not feel personal enough, or may lead people to make ideas about them, disregarding the spiritual, fluid, flux, free, feminine, etc. part of their identity as a man. That’s why some may use labels like boyflux, deaboy, magiboy, etc. When one says, “I’m a man” people are usually lead to believe that they are masculine, binary, stable (not fluid/flux/fluix), and that cuts out the deep, personal, etc. part of their identity that doesn’t naturally come with the idea of being a man. 

2. Someone may fit multiple labels. 

Many people find a few labels they fit and are comfortable with that one label. 

But some people may feel like they fit both pansexual and bisexual. Or they may be genderfluid, but don’t feel comfortable with genderfluid, and would rather describe themselves as female, demigender, novigender and agender all at the same time. 

Someone may also still be questioning themselves. They may be questioning between agender, demigender and dryagender, and feel comfortable with using  all of those terms. 

3. It makes people more comfortable.

The soul purpose of labels is to make people more comfortable with themselves and to represent themselves. 

Whether its “I’m a lesbian transwoman” or “I’m a gynosexual idemromantic pangender boyflux person.”

You should use whatever labels you fit, and however many you want. 

If anyone tries to stop you from using “micro Tumblr labels”, ignore them and just remember that those labels are for you, and you use them for you. 

They do not effect anyone else. 

They are tools for you to feel more at home in your body and mind. 

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Here’s my flag for genderplasmic. The middle purple and color/stripe orders are from the genderfluid flag, but all of the colors are in the same area of the color spectrum and don’t harshly contrast one another to represent plasmic experiences.

Plasmic: a gender that has some similarities to (gender)fluidity, or (gender)fluid qualities, but does not change from one gender to another- it’s the same gender, shifting and moving within itself. It isn’t between fluid and solid or a combination either; it’s its own state of gender. “Plasmic” can be used as you would use “fluid”, and it can be denoted as genderplasmic as a counterpart to genderfluid if that format is preferred.

[pro-mogai-trans-blog]

Gender Wiki pt.4 Boy + Girlflux

Boyflux is a type of genderflux. 

There are two definitions for boyflux, both of which are correct.

1. Someone who is genderflux and identifies more masculine. 

2. Someone who fluctuates between any or all masculine identities. 

An example may be someone who fluctuates between agender and hyper masculine. They may identify as demiboy, grey/grayboy, male, etc. 

They may  even fluctuate between xeniic masculine genders. 

Girlflux is the opposite. They may fluctuate between any or all feminine identities. 

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Genderlaino

Genderlaino: a gender that feels misty, or inside a windy forest. it gives off a vibe of comfortableness and the feeling of rain falling softly on a tin roof

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Genderkea

Genderkea: a gender that feels comfortable, but relates to smoke and the scent of burning wood. it gives off the vibe of a cabin in the mountains and the smell of conifer trees and related to evergreen green

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Gender Wiki pt.3 Sleepygender

Sleepygender is described as a gender that is characterized by feeling sleepy, soft, and tired. It can be influenced by sleep or lack thereof.

I love the flag!

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Gender Wiki pt.2 Tidalgender

Tidalgender is a xenogender described as similar to the tides of an ocean, tidalgender is a gender that rises and falls in intensity every few hours, days, weeks, months, or even years. The lower levels of tidalgender are called low gender while the higher levels are called high gender. For example, you could say you feel like you’re high stargender, or low demiboy, or even high genderflux and low genderfluid simultaneously.

This is under both the genderfluid and genderflux.

The flag is to pretty!

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My Full Pronoun Sets

These are all the pronouns I use. 

I identify as a cengender fluix man, btw!

He/he’s/his/him/himself {h-ee/h-iz/h-imm}

Rai/rai’s/rain/rain’s/rainself {r-eye/r-ain}

Vai/vai’s/vair/vair/vaiself {v-eye/v-ear}

Ze/ze’s/zed/zed’s/zedself {z-ee/z-edd}

Ri/ri’s/rid/rid’s/riself {r-eye/r-ide}

Lee/lee’s/lilith/lilith’s/lilself {l-ee/l-ill-ith/l-ill-self}

Dar/dar’s/dark/dark’s/darself {d-are/d-ark}

Fae/fae’s/faer/faer/faerself {ph-aye/ph-ear}

Stor/stor’s/storm/storm’s/stormself {st-or/st-or-m}

DMs and ASKs are always open!

[pro-mogai-trans-blog]

Gender Wiki pt.1 - Trigender

Trigender is traditionally defined as being a woman, man and a third gender, as the flag shows, with the pink, blueish purple and green.

And while this is most common, this is not always the case.

This can be any three genders. Man, woman, agender; demiboy, boyflux, libramasculine; etc. 

A person may have a ‘dominant’ gender, or may be fluid between these three. They can have three separate genders, three genders mixed together or fluctuating between three genders. 

These genders can all be close; man, boyflux, agender boy, boi, demiboy, etc. or very different and contradicting; pyrogender (fire related gender), icegender (a cold gender), biogender (a gender related to nature). 

DMs and ASKs are always open!

[pro-mogai-trans-blog]

What are Xenogenders + Two Common Questions

So, as my first post about gender, I will be explaining what xenogenders are. 

What are xenogenders?

Xenogender is an umbrella term for ‘non traditional’ genders. These genders fall under the transgender and non-binary umbrellas, though not all individuals who use xenogender labels want to call themselves non-binary or transgender.

Xenogenders, also known as xenic genders or ‘xenic’, are genders that do not fit the traditional definition of gender.  

These genders are often ‘linked, connected, made of, made from, related to or alike’ animals, environments, aesthetics, sounds, themes, moods, temperatures, plants, weather and so on. 

Many of these genders may be linked to spiritual beliefs, such as energies and such, but it is important to know that not all xenic individuals are spiritual. 

Many xenic individuals are transfeminine, transmasculine or neutral. For example, a transmasculine xenic person may identify with things they see as masculine; the cold, the color blue, the ocean, the dark, storms, etc. but do not identify as a man.  

They may often use neopronouns, but they can still use he/him, she/her, and they/them. 

Common pronouns are:

Xe/xem

Zi/zir

Vai/vair

Fae/faer

Hi/hir

Ey/em

They may also use noun pronouns, pronouns which are made from nouns and other words, such as rai/rain/rainself. There are also emoji pronouns, which are pronoun using emojis, such as 🌸/🌸’s/🌸self. These pronouns are made for written, not to be spoken. They often use noun pronouns that correspond with their emoji pronouns.

Do xenogender individuals have dysphoria?

 Not all do, but many do experience some type of gender dysphoria. Many of us have pronoun dysphoria, name dysphoria and many of us have social and body dysphoria. 

Some xenogender individuals do pack, use binders, and may take T or E. 

Does science back it up?

No, but why does that matter?

Scientists have better things to do then to prove all genders. And there is no proof against us though.

Also, non-binary labels like genderfluid, genderqueer, agender, etc. were not proven until recently, in the last 20/30 years, but it has always existed. Things exist without being prove. People though that being gay and lesbian was a mental illness that was contagious, and that as “proven by science”. Not all things need to be proven. 

I hope this helps anyone is confused about xenogenders. 

Asks and DMs are always open!