quasar-sys

[quasar-sys]

AVPD mixed with being schizospec is genuinely one of the most frustrating things out there, and I wish more people knew about both cluster a and cluster c disorders, since essentially nobody knows about us. nobody else realizes just how terrifying being perceivable is; the absolute catatonic panic that comes with having one too many eyes on you, the absolute horror of being interpreted wrong, the nonstop animalistic urge to flee. it's a constant battle to not up and disappear, and it's one a lot of us lose pretty frequently. it's so much easier and more comforting to merely exist in people's minds as a concept, and yet, that's so lonely. isolating yourself because you can't handle the idea of being judged, of being confronted, of being watched, of being misinterpreted is familiar, a comfort zone, but you're also acutely aware it's unhealthy, you just have no idea how to break the cycle. you've tried so many times, and it always ends up with you by yourself again. I think anyone with AVPD or anyone on the schizospec can relate to the experience of constantly falling off the map for an indefinite amount of time and eventually reemerging from whatever grimy, desolate hole you put yourself in completely different, completely changed, completely new identity because the old one made it feel like there were bugs crawling underneath your skin. I wish people took the time to understand more and realize that I desperately want close relationships, but it's so, so hard. it's completely debilitating, borderline impossible, and yet, I still have to try.

[quasar-sys]

Can I ask if you guys are pro endo?

for now we stricly believe that one can be a system due to trauma. unless if the professionals can change their studies we stay by that. so no, we arent pro endo.

[quasar-sys]

i cant really get into stuff a lot. because i easily form fictivez from the subject, its draining. but that wont stop me from loving what i love!

[quasar-sys]

sorry for being inactive

i, the host, need a break. this system stuff is still so shocking to me. im not going to be ready to face my system again for awhile. hope that's understandable.

(theres a chance ill go back on my word)

[quasar-sys]

man having DID is an absolute trip

[quasar-sys]

Me after going through a stressful situation like “now that wasn’t so rough I’m fine! I managed to get out of that, in fact I dare to say i’m actually doing pretty good- “

The newly formed alter looking at me from the corner of the front room like… yea…

[quasar-sys]

irls find me weird...

[quasar-sys]

THIS IS LITERALLY SO COOL ...

system question:

what is it like to live in headspace for most of your life?

[quasar-sys]

hey ive been getting these sudden waves of exhaustion everytime i do regular activities like go out to eat or talk to people. its like out of nowhere and then i just feel way more tired than before, and its a legit wave that spawns through, like whiplash almost. i was wondering if any of you knew what is going onn??

[quasar-sys]

not much people talk about the breakdowns that happen once you realize youre a system.

[quasar-sys]

its the gang...

(planning to also make the avpd creature, the "gtg")

[quasar-sys]

system question:

what is it like to live in headspace for most of your life?

[quasar-sys]

A: idk much abt our void but there are a lot of scattered alters there. ur void seems intimidating, i hope u guys didnt lose anything precious to you there.

B: OMG SOUNDS PEACEFUL... UR HEADSPACE SEEMS LIKE IT HAS A MIND OF ITS OWN. BE CAREFUL!! OVERALL I HOPE YALL ARE AT PEACE IN THERE SOMETIMES...

system question:

what is it like to live in headspace for most of your life?

[quasar-sys]

sounds fire. i find whenevr i get sucked in its a pretty intimidating experience, ill get used to it...

system question:

what is it like to live in headspace for most of your life?

[quasar-sys]

ooo cool... maybe i should go in more. maybe then ill find more info.

system question:

what is it like to live in headspace for most of your life?

[quasar-sys]

Reminder that you can't say you support ''transramcoa'' people AND say that you don't support abuse and torture. Being 'transramcoa' is calling ramcoa desirable, that's the whole point of the fucking term. Calling ramcoa something you WANT to go through is supporting abusers. You are aiding people who torture children. There's no way to sugarcoat it, that is what you're doing. You're putting down survivors and supporting their abusers. You're treating ramcoa like a flashy identity. You're acting like it's something fun to put on your account to stand out, and not a form of abuse. You're treating child rape and torture like a queer identity. There's nothing else to it. That's what you're doing. You're calling it a term for inclusivity, and something adaptable. Not a term used to explain abuse. Seriously, get offline. This shit is rotting your brain

[quasar-sys]

playing regular video games is a trip with DID

me and the others always want to do stuff at the same time, so you might see us running around in circles before we make one final decision of what we want to do.