reidsbuckley

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Literally my favorite plot line from my current WIP, and definitely one of my favorite monologues I’ve ever written for Buck

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And on this week of what the fuck is B up to, I present to you two starkly different snippets from this week's chapter of Cathartic Vulnerability of the Glass Closet.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

I can't wait to post this chapter on Thursday.

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I know I haven’t been on my stranger things shit in a while but let me tell you will’s scream in that teaser trailer?? That boy has POWERS!!!!! He was screaming like he was communicating with people while he was in a different dimension. Like that was some earth-shattering type screaming. Like you could hear that in the heavens. It probably sounded like it was booming from the clouds as it shook the ground they stood upon.

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New Chapter of Cathartic Vulnerability, Out Now!

Chapter Summary: Buck has been doing considerably well. He feels like his life is finally starting to fall back to normal. As normal as his life can be with the lingering question of 'Who am I?' that he keeps buried deep inside his brain. But with burying your emotions, there's always a breakdown to follow.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/65048905

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What hit me about that line is that they wrote Chim to say that meanwhile…TM couldn’t give him that grace? Like, Peter Krause built a legacy of a character on that show and the way they had him die was just so…and the funeral being 5 minutes of an episode, shorter than Eddie’s uber montage? With us being taunted by a plot line about a mother who didn’t believe her son was dead, an empty casket, etc.?

Like WE, the fans, have respected Peter Krause and Bobby Nash more than TM ever has– we do in fact miss him and mourn him, but we don’t disrespect what he brought to the show and we curse what was done with his character’s ending.

Honestly Chim’s speech felt like a better goodbye for Bobby than his actual funeral, and that makes me feel so fucking shitty because what do you mean I didn’t cry during the funeral ep until I saw his family’s graves, but I was crying from the moment Graham fell unconscious until the end of the episode? Like dpmo.

"We can miss him and we can mourn him and we can even curse his name, but we are not going to disrespect him by throwing away what he built right here."

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Things that don’t make sense if Eddie Diaz is in fact straight and Evan Buckley does not have romantic feelings towards him:

• “they’re not my type” says Eddie Diaz after seeing literally most of the possible types a man could have– including one who is the exact type that his (dead) wife is

• Buck saying “thanks” to being told that he and Eddie have “an adorable son” rather than correcting the lady

• Eddie saying “I don’t want to feel like I have to perform” in reference to him going out on dates with women

• Tommy being surprised that Buck said he was trying to get his attention (we all thought he was trying to get Eddie’s let’s be so fr)

• Buck saying “I don’t have to sleep with everyone I have feelings for” despite having, in fact, slept with everyone that he’s canonically had feelings for (so like…it only makes sense he’s in love with Eddie from that statement alone)

• Eddie having a literal panic attack at the thought of being a ready-made family with a woman despite his years of co-parenting Christopher with Buck (as confirmed by OS and a writer/producer/someone who works on the show that I can’t remember the name of)

• Buck’s “yeah, I know exactly what you mean” after Eddie said that he and Tommy just “clicked” 💀

• Eddie’s inability to actively participate in a long-term relationship with a woman

• Buck’s inability to shut up about Eddie for 2 seconds (I am so sorry Ravi 😭 that man was gonna drag you down with him!)

• Eddie telling Father Brian that he’s straight when literally no one brought that up

• Buck calling Eddie straight when literally no one in that convo said he wasn’t as a way of deflecting from answering Maddie’s question of if he’s in love with him

• Buck immediately clocking who Tommy was talking about when he said “don’t make me say it” about who he felt was his competition with Buck

• Buck saying that Eddie’s straight and Tommy’s response of “okay” with a snort 😭 clock the tea!

• “I just think you’re not sure of your own feelings yet, and if there’s something you need to tell Eddie you will– in your own time” — Maddie Buckley I wanna give you a kiss for all your Buddie warriorism over the last 7 years.

Like baby we’ve won a third of the battle with them making Bi Buck canon, can we get the other two thirds of Gay Eddie and Buddie canon?

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Would anyone be interested in an andie-Mack style 9-1-1 fic where Maddie is buck’s real mom and not his older sister? And that’s the big secret that was kept, not the fact that he had a brother who died from cancer and the only reason he was conceived was to save him?

Or maybe both? Like, Maddie was pregnant when Daniel was diagnosed, and the buckley parents forced Maddie to have buck’s blood tested as soon as he was born only to find out he wasn’t a match and have resented him for it ever since?

This goes without saying that obviously the ages would be a bit different than in canon. I was thinking of going based off the actor’s age gap, which is 13 years and considering the world we live in it’s not impossible for that to be a real situation (though that is not me encouraging it!)

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This might be an unpopular opinion, but I liked the episode! Sure, some aspects of it were a bit underwhelming but from the moment I thought Graham was gonna die I was crying and didn't stop for the rest of the episode.

Starting with my critiques: I think that the emergency could have taken up a little less screen time, but in the end I didn't mind too much. I think the other thing for me was Eddie's rescue of Buck and Ravi. I wished it had been just a bit more dramatic. You know, maybe when it was Buck's turn to go there was another rumble that caused a crash that Buck went down with, and then Eddie went in to save him from there. But overall, with the first bump we got and that look that Buck gave Eddie, I was cool with it.

Now onto other things! From the moment that Chim went in after Athena, I knew something big was happening for him this episode. And something big did happen! And the moment he started calling out orders in the laundry room I knew we were getting Captain Howard Chimney Han, and I am so happy about that! I know that a lot of people wanted Hen to become captain, but if y'all remember when she was going to med school and she was interim captain, she nearly died. She had to pull over on the side of the road because she was so exhausted she was falling asleep while driving, and she was losing quality time with her family. Of course she turned it down! I was genuinely not surprised that she did that. Plus, Chim has been at the 118 longer than the any of the main cast, including Bobby himself. And as great of a captain that Bobby was, the way that Chimney spoke about him in his speech kind of gave me the closure I needed to accept Bobby's death and move forward with this new age and era of 9-1-1.

Another great thing was that we got Chimthena! The band is back, y'all! When she was telling him about how Bobby felt about him, I could tell that was her way of saying that she forgives him, even though it wasn't Chim's fault. It was also her way of urging Chimney to go for the role of captain, that it's where she thinks he deserves to be, and she is so right! And then for Chimney to be the one to tell Athena that he and Maddie named their baby boy Robert Nash Han? And Athena looking fondly at the Henren wedding photo? They're so besties! That's my family!

I also really appreciated the fact that Eddie and Chris are staying, of course, and all thanks to Captain Chim!!! He really said "Fuck your parents and El Paso, you're staying!" and then turned to Buck and said "and you too!" I also really like what he said about grief. That if Buck transferred or Eddie went back to El Paso, it wouldn't make the grief go away but force them to grieve in solitude instead (even though that's what they were literally fighting about the episode before!!!)

Now, I did say "Fuck? What do you mean?" when I saw that Buck was looking for a new place, but then he said he wanted something that felt more lived-in? Y'all, I'm calling it now we're gonna start the new season with Buddie roommates still because Buck is still looking for a new place, and that is going to be what leads to Buddie canon (if we get it at all). At least, that is what I hope happens with that plot line because right now? Yeah, I'm kind of pissed not at Oliver and Ryan essentially but more their PR team for allowing all of those interviews and Buddie questions when they all knew nothing was happening this season. Moreover I'm mad at Tim Minear because I just know Ryan Murphy is fighting for his life trying to get those to men to kiss. Like, RM made Gleeu- you cannot convince me that he's not gunning for Buddie, too. I'm convinced that it's just TM and KR keeping it from happening. But if we could get bi Buck canon after screaming it from the rooftops from day 1 then I'm sure we could weasel our way into Buddie canon in the next season or two (and as much as I would like it to happen sooner or later, I think it would take 1-2 more seasons for it to actually happen based solely on where they are right now. I mean, they're a slowburn and are meant to be a slowburn. Their feelings realization? Yeah, that's going to be at least a half a season on its own, another half season for both confessions, followed by us starting the season after that with them tip-toeing around each other because they don't want to fuck things up but they're just so in love and I think 1.3 seasons is about when we'll get Buddie canon. Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk).

Note: I would still love to see the Bobby-in-a-government-facility Theory come true, but this is just where I'm at right now!

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Every fucking time Eddie Diaz says “you’re making this about you,” what he means is “I needed help and I wanted you and you weren’t there,” and that makes me FUCKING INSANE

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Just saw a 9-1-1 character ranking, and everything was going swell until we got to number 2 and I realized they named everyone…and then I looked at their number 1 and saw Tommy… now look like him if you want but how are you going to put him at 1 but Gerard at the second worst in your ranking? Like you hate Gerard because he’s racist, yes? WELL TOMMY IS TOO!!!

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I need a million captain chimney fics right now please and thank you

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My biggest moment from last episode actually was when Pepa called Buck “cariño”. Like that is straight fanon right there that they made canon. In every 9-1-1 fandom space, in every fic, Eddie and the Diaz family calls Buck “cariño” and you’re telling me I saw that happen on live TV on my television screen last Thursday via Tía Pepa?

Literally the biggest win ever, mind you we also got Buddie roommates and Buck and Chris reunion. And Eddie’s reaction to Bobby’s death. And a Buddie kitchen scene that was a fight that started over groceries. You tell me that’s not winning. I don’t believe you.

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This frog I saw at work is literally Christopher diaz

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yeah idk man maybe i just don't like it when characters whose whole story is about choosing to live and overcoming suicidal ideation end up dying in a hero sacrifice. kinda leaves a bad taste in my mouth, not gonna lie.

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thinking about eddie covering his mouth because he didn’t want christopher to think he was breaking down like the last time. killing mydelf

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sorry to tim minear and peter krause quite literally nothing could convince me bobby is actually dead I'm about to channel a level of delusion so intense it will only be rivaled by my belief in buddie canon pre-s7

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#denial is a river in egypt