sagesorrows - Tumblr blog

[sagesorrows]

I hate how formal sounding a lot of gender neutral terms are

I’ve started using bitch as a casual alternative to person

[sagesorrows]

“Modern fnaf sucks” I say as I consume every single piece of fnaf media as soon as it comes out

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Normalise sucking at the hobbies you’re interested in

Like engaging with them a lot and still being abysmal at them,

a lost cause,

your pet looking at you struggle with pity in their eyes levels of bad

[sagesorrows]

So it took a lot of rewriting and completely changing my original draft but I think I’ve done it

Why do I think Doki Doki Literature Club is one of the best horror experiences I’ve ever had

I spent a lot of time going through the game and dismantling the experience in order to break down what I was feeling due to which specific part (like a weird therapy session)

(Also for the sake of not making this too long I’m going to assume you know the plot of DDLC)

The game’s facade is really well done and goes on for a pretty big portion of a 4 hour game, allowing you to really understand all the characters and grow attached. It’s mainly to heighten the horror later, not just the twist. As Salvato himself said, if all DDLC had to offer was the “haha gotcha” twist moment it would be pointless. DDLC is so much more than one shocking moment, it’s a constant slow dragging of a feeling of unease for the rest of the playthrough. It’s kind of like being hit by a truck but after that you’re swung at by several baseball bats repeatedly.

How is this unease achieved? Well after the shock of Sayori’s death you are on a one way ride to pure insanity as the game falls apart before your very eyes. Glitches and scares happen at any moment leaving you constantly on edge. When these things do happen it’s never acknowledged by anyone and the game moves along as normal…well whatever normal is for act 2. At no point does the game ever pull the brakes on the horror. It just rises in intensity, giving you no time to digest what’s happening before hitting you with something worse. It’s like an over boiling pot that you just have to sit and watch.

Given that it is a visual novel and involves a lot of reading (who could’ve guessed), Salvato takes advantage of the medium by filling it with all kinds of clever foreshadowing. Wow the game that involves reading rewards you for reading. Anyway, the writing does increase the fear factor of act 2 but also it makes a second playthrough much different than the first. In act 2 the subtle changes in dialogue really add to the “something’s off” feel as the cracks emerge. A lot of it involves Yuri since she’s kind of the star of the act. The description of Portrait of Markov becomes dramatically different and far more gruesome. Even Monika who was surprised by Yuri’s interest in horror in act 1 says it suits her in act 2 (also her line about horror: “Isn't it amazing how a writer can so deliberately take advantage of your own lack of imagination to completely throw you for a loop?”, Salvato you self congratulatory bastard). As for a second playthrough, the foreshadowing in act 1 becomes much more obvious. It makes even the most innocent lines subject to speculation as to what it might be referring to. “You really left her hanging this morning” still gives me chills every time

I think what really makes the horror however is in it’s main theme: The illusion of choice/lack of free will.

There’s not a lot of gameplay in DDLC. You can choose which girl you want to write a poem for, which girl you’re siding with in the argument, and which girl to spend the weekend with. Typical dating sim stuff. You are met with one big decision in act 1: accept Sayori’s confession or not. This is where the game begins to show you that you’re not in control of this story. No matter what you pick Sayori takes her own life, and no matter what you pick the protagonist second guesses his actions, saying it was his fault for doing the wrong thing. Having a major event like this seemingly be a result of the players choice shortly beforehand is very unsettling. During act 2 the player’s choice has completely vanished. The protagonist is sort of dragged around, forced into uncomfortable situations without much of a say. You can’t choose who you’re writing a poem for because you’re spending time with Yuri if you like it or not. You can’t choose who to side with in the argument since nothing works and then Monika pulls you away to spend time with her instead. You can’t choose who to spend the weekend because it’s Just Monika. You’re mostly a silent observer watching as the insanity unfolds. And just like act 1, you’re met with an important decision: to accept or decline Yuri’s confession. Unsurprisingly it goes just as well as last time and either way Yuri stabs herself. Then you’re forced to sit there with her decaying corpse for the whole weekend as a consequence of your action (though forced it still happened because of a choice you actively made). Act 3 isn’t any better as it’s just you stuck in an empty room having a one sided conversation with Monika that you aren’t really given any sort of say in. But it is here we learn that we’re not the only one who’s trapped in this

Monika expresses the pain that comes with being aware you’re in a game. The emptiness and the agonising psychological torture. It’s hard to relate to such a situation but it’s not a bad thing, it leaves it up to the players imagination to consider what that must feel like. Monika was forced to not have a route in the game. She’s forced to be aware of the world beyond the screen (according to DDLC+). And she’s forced to stand by as you, the only real thing in her life, get to hang out with everyone else in the club. Her conversation topics usually discuss the lack of free will and a pretty nihilistic world view. It’s a little bit of a Green Goblin scenario but like actually emotional.

Even the ending in all its exceptional bittersweetness is forced. There’s no ending that doesn’t result in the end of the literature club.

Anyway time for some miscellaneous things I like about the game:

Monika’s design and sprites purposefully make her stand out so that’s cool

Random unsettling easter eggs for funsies really adds to the brain scrambling of it all

The music is fun, I like it when they do fucked up corrupted versions it’s pretty spooky

I like how every member has a distinct unique writing style, it really helps build their personalities

When Yuri says “stagnating air is common foreshadowing that something terrible is about the happen” and someone died twice was cool

I think it’s great that this game allowed the game grumps playthrough to exist

Anyway I hope this was coherent enough that you don’t have a migraine now, laters alligators

[sagesorrows]

Might post a whole rant about how DDLC is one of my favourite pieces of horror media and maybe another about why Monika is one of my all time favourite characters idk yet

Because I don’t know anyone irl willing to listen to me praising an indie horror title that peaked in 2017 for several pages worth of information like my English grade depended on it

[sagesorrows]

I want to know everything

I need to have a variety of diverse skills, learn every language, read every book on every topic ever…

But instead I’m here lying on my cold hard floor

I kind of feel like a worm

[sagesorrows]

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I’m Sage, a very real and normal “Human”

They/Them

Here’s a quick summary I guess

(+image that’s kind of me but way cooler looking)

I love all forms of writing though I’m not very good

Don’t expect any of that here though, this is just for random thoughts I have

I don’t know anything about star signs or those personality types so you’re just going to have to guess my personality

I’m pretty introverted though and I suppose creative

Here’s a list of some of the cringe interests I may mention at any moment

DDLC

MCR

Pokémon

FNAF

Bloom Into You

The Owl House

I may also talk about horror in general or about my writing problems or maybe gay shit who knows

Also I’m the no.1 Monika fan

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Why couldn’t god give me NORMAL and SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE interests that people actually CARE ABOUT

Like girl what the fuck is this

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Man this planet kinda sucks

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I was never really into fanfiction but then I realised some of you are actually really good at making fictional characters fall in love with each other in highly unrealistic scenarios

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So many ideas, so little ability

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Starting pride month strong by infodumping about mcr lore to my therapist

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I hate when people clump introversion, shyness, and hatred of social interaction together

Like I know I don’t say much but I do like people, you guys just need to shut the fuck up sometimes

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Just “probably autistic I don’t know I’m not diagnosed yet” things! xoxo

[sagesorrows]

The transmasculine urge to be so feminine and pretty hehe