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happy national impersonate your favorite vigilante day to those who celebrate

Part 2

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someone asking what my favorite movie is (i have to hold myself back from saying the lego batman movie)

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Having ur main emotional response be crying is so embarrassing like ill be trying to explain why im mad or ill try having a serious convo abt smthn that upsets me and ill start crying like a baby and i have to like turn around and go “i am not crying 4 pity or to emotionally manipulate u im crying cuz im a little bitch, give me a sec”

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Okay. But when Bruce discovers Talia knew Jason was alive? That she knew his child was the man under the red hood. His boy.

Oh.

Jason’s met and memorized every facet of Bruce Wayne. He knows Bruce by the way his eyes melt when he looks at him, to the hard lines of his cowl. He knows where Bruce starts and Batman ends.

When Bruce rips off his cowl to give her the deepest glare Jason’s ever seen, he’s reminded there’s no difference. Fear hits his stomach when he swallows,

“Hey, old man, don’t fucking blame HER. She has NO obligation to you—“

Bruce’s eyes are unblinking, wide, jumping from her frozen form to him. And Jason’s suddenly 10 again, running from hungry stray dogs cornering him in a place with no exit.

Bruce’s voice is shadow and whisper, “Quiet.”

“…Okay.”

“Damian,” he rasps, pointing at the small figure with dark hair and green eyes, who looks at neither of them. He looks at Talia. Jason thinks it’s fair. He’s never seen her scared, either. “Car. Cave. Stay. “

There’s something incredibly bitter in Jason when he just does. Doesn’t ask. Doesn’t rebel. He wants to, with every fiber and matter and crumb in his body. And his body says no.

He grabs Damian like he’s an angry cat, not the small assassin he knew since he was born. He doesn’t look back. He doesn’t want to, he realizes.

“Did you know?” Bruce asks, such a deadly calm to him, too calm for the winter in his eyes. Talia would’ve preferred a blade to the neck.

She can’t meet his eye. Almost like if she doesn’t face his hatred, his disapproval, his disappointment, it doesn’t count. “I did. “

“…Whatever you do,” she’d take it as pity if he didn’t sound repulsed , “you’re still his daughter.”

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I just made a joke about Bruce Wayne having a tv show/miniseries where he travels around the world and talks about local history but it’s in the style of Philomena Cunk.

Fantastic. Love it. Very fun.

But now I also want the (extended) Wayne Family to have a YouTube channel where they just infodump about their interests.

It starts as Dick “secretly” filming a drunk Bruce while he rants about the Tunguska Event. Uploads are sporadic at first and it’s mostly Bruce talking about random topics (the chytrid fungus’ detrimental affect on amphibian populations, the history of sea monkeys, etc) while drunk.

The rest of the family get in on it here and there but it officially becomes a Thing when they upload an hour long video titled “The True Meaning of Clown | an introspective look at clowns in American history” with the thumbnail brightly proclaiming “Alternatively Why The Joker Isn’t a Real Clown (Or Even Particularly Funny)” and a very sober Dick Grayson factually tearing joker apart.

Tim finally convinces Bruce that it would be more suspicious if they didn’t post about Batman. That same night he uploads a 7 Hour Unhinged Red String Conspiracy Board video simply titled “Batlore”.

Nearly the entire family have a round table/socratic seminar style discussion about the lore of fnaf. And yes, they’ve solved it all.

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hello!! i’m a brand new editor looking for some moots over on the ⏰ app!! i edit fandoms like the batfamily, marvel, overwatch, chappell roan, etc! really just whatever i feel like ^^

no pressure, but i hope to see you there 🤭🤭

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would you love me if I was a bald little worm

yes and i'd dress u up like this since ur bald

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someone reblogged this post from like three and a half months ago and now it’s all i can think about. fic incoming ??

i can’t stop thinking about tim drake as spider-man. Going to galas as a kid, meeting the wayne’s. figuring out their personas. at some point getting bit by a spider and gaining powers — which he then is immediately like “i can be like them!!” and uses them for good

imagine you’re just out patrolling one night and suddenly there’s this scrawny little figure flinging themself off buildings and webbing up rogues with a bright smile

(yes i’ll probably write a fic about this)

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”Am I making you feel sick?” and it’s the image of dead Robin Jason Todd haunting Bruce

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following my irls is so silly cause it’s like yeah!! i wanna see all your work but also please ignore my insane rambling about fictional characters

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there’s nothing scarier than a bat with nothing but their fists.

criminals have come to learn this as time goes on. Scrapes and cuts can be mended, smoke bombs wafted away. But when they have nothing left? When a Bat takes a deep breath, collects themselves, and gets up despite their lack of weapons? You might as well surrender right there.

there has to be this certain kind of fear that hits, as a Bat, when you reach for your belt mid-battle and there’s nothing left. no explosives, no batarangs, no more knives or weapons or anything you can use in close quarter combat. the fear hits you like a ringing bell, and then you take a breath. you calm down and remember Bruce’s training. the very specific lesson he’d given on exactly this moment — when your gloved fingers scrape at nothing and you only have your wits to save you.

every time, every single Bat has come back from that moment of fear. maybe they don’t emerge uninjured, but they never give up. they never sit back and say there’s nothing I can do, now.

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a child picking up the mantle of Robin (they are immediately doomed by the narrative)

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“God loves you, but not enough to save you.” but it’s Jason Todd in his final moments

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In the early days of Batman and Robin, around the time of Robin joining his own teen superhero team, Robin finally convinced Batman that he “can’t just ride around in the Batmobile forever, he needs his own ride! His own way to drive around and carry people if Batman isn’t there.”

Bruce, of course, is quietly devastated at the reminder that his son is growing up (he nearly started crying when Dick outgrew his booster seat in the Batmobile, they still have a little spot for it in the Batcave), but agrees that Robin has a point. This is how Robin gets his first motorcycle, under the agreement that he will be extremely careful and always wear the appropriate helmet while riding.

Of course the first thing Robin does is turn around and teach himself how to do the Akira slide on his bike.

And of course Nightwing makes sure this is one of first things he teaches Robin when he and Jason are bonding for the first time. It’s one of their best memories, messing around on an empty lot, burning tires and picking up scrapes. Dick has never seen Jason grin so widely before.

But then Jason dies. And suddenly the little silly things like bike tricks don’t feel like enough anymore. Not when one of the only other people who would have understood that reference is so devastated by his failures that he’s putting people in urgent care every night and close to ending up there himself.

So when Tim comes around, stubbornly shoving his way under Batman’s cape, for his own damn good, Dick hesitates to teach him the little things that he taught Jason. But he gives in anyways, because Robin needs to feel supported and cared about, and in a silly way, that’s what the Akira slide is about. That was why Bruce gave Dick his first motorcycle in the first place.

A few years pass, a new few players join the scene. A new crime lord starts rising through the ranks, he also whips through the streets on a motorcycle (honestly, there’s no other way to blow through the static Gotham traffic).

And then, the Red Hood does it. Right in front of Nightwing, on a midnight chase through the city. The mother-fucking Akira slide.

“Jason?”

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i was told to come on here and post..uhm.🤡

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Giving battinson the big birb hug he so desperately needs 🫂