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[stahvie]

A oneshot in which the reader can see the future so she is kept in control of Snoke (she is friends with Kylo and sometimes he brings gifts to her) But one day Snoke forces kylo ren to hold the girl while he enters her mind forcing her to have a vision and she gets very hurt and then Kylo takes care of her and kisses her gently promising to kill Snoke for what he did. Sorry for the details

Ahh! I just realised I read it wrong... uhhh... hope this is at least kinda what you were after :x

Word Count: 2146

Warnings: Whole lotta pain

Force sensitive, but not powerful enough to be taken on asan apprentice, there was one thing that kept you from the same tragic fate asothers with force sensitivity; you had the power of force vision.

Taken at a young age, you didn’t remember your life beforebecoming Snoke’s property, though certain scents could trigger a visionsometimes. With no memory of your past, all you knew was life as Snoke’s pet.You were moderately well kept though. Your wardrobe consisted of long crimsonrobes and your quarters were modest but nice. Your only real complaint was thatit was a lonely life.

Snoke kept you away from other people, if you weren’t withhim, you were confined to your room. The only person you had been allowedlimited contact with was Kylo Ren, another of his pets, albeit with a muchlonger leash.

Although Kylo was older than you, you’d been with Snoke formuch longer, but you could sense that in a way, Snoke had been an influenceover Kylo his whole life. It was clear Kylo felt some kind of sympathy for you,or maybe it was empathy considering he also knew how Snoke could be, eitherway, you were thankful to have this one friendly connection to reality.

Snoke would use you for the benefit of the First Order, toget the upper hand on his enemies, but mostly for his own agendas. Kylo was theopposite. Kylo never spoke to you about the war, he kept you up to date on thenicer things in the galaxy, and when possible, he’d bring you small trinketshe’d picked up on his missions as long as they were easy to conceal.

“I want to teach you something.” Kylo told you aftersneaking into your quarters shortly after Snoke had forbidden visitors,including your beauty-marked friend. You didn’t need the distraction he’d said.

“What is it?” You asked him.

“A way to close yourself off. Protect your mind fromintruders.” He said. “To hide your intentions and actions.”

“You know how to do that?”

“I’m still learning, but I’ve mostly got it figured out.”

“You? But you’re so impulsive. You think you can hide that?”You laughed softly at Kylo.

Had it been anyone else giggling at him, Kylo would havereacted very differently, but you were a kind soul. Kylo knew your laughter wasnever malicious. You were soft. Delicate. This was why he needed to protectyou.

The pair of you took turns trying to prevent each other fromentering your minds. It was no surprise that Kylo could easily invade yours, hewas powerful with the force and you really only had the one ability. Thatdidn’t stop him from encouraging you. He didn’t just want you to learn this sohe could secretly keep visiting you, Kylo also feared Snoke might break you insome way, and maybe this could help. He needed to keep you safe from theSupreme Leader.

“Use your vision to see what I’ve brought you.” Kylosuggested.

You concentrated. You couldn’t see into other people’sminds, that was something for people who were more adept with the force, still,you looked. It was a rock. It had been shaped into a cube about the size of adie and completely smooth. When you held it, it would change colour dependingon your mood. You could find similar objects at bazars and markets across thegalaxy but they were cheap imitations that would change based on bodytemperature. This was the real thing.

“Kylo! They’re so rare… how did you…?” You asked trying tobe polite. You could’ve looked for the answer yourself, but a proper conversationfelt a lot less rude and invasive.

“I came across it on my last mission.” Kylo answered. Therewas a pause. He didn’t want to burden you with details but you were veryclearly waiting for them. “A Senator. His allegiance had changed and we couldn’tlet him share First Order secrets with the enemy. He wasn’t going to need itanymore.”

Kylo withdrew the cube from his robes and placed it in yourhands. For something so small, it sure had a lot of weight to it. Your fingerstightened around it as you brought it up to your chest and thanked him. Many ofthe gifts Kylo had given you had been obtained via morally and ethicallyquestionable ways, but that never bothered you. It was the thought that counts,and each present was proof that he thought of you.

“What colour is it?”

You unwrapped your fingers from around it and brought itbetween the two of you. Pink. The same kind of pink that was beginning to tingeKylo’s cheeks.

“Yeah, I thought you’d like it.” He said.

“What’s pink mean?” You asked.

Kylo moved toward the calligraphy set he’d once given youduring another visit. He created a guide depicting what each colour meant.There hadn’t been one with the cube when he took it from the Senator’s home sohe’d done some research of his own.

“Pink is love.” Kylo said, placing the parchment in yourempty hand. “I didn’t know for sure if you’d love it, but I’m glad you do.”

There was no way he thought you loving the gift was thereason for it being pink. The way your heart fluttered in his presence was allyou needed to know that the love you felt was for him. It was kind of him topretend not to notice. It must have been impossible for him not to pick up onit.

There were times when you wanted to use your vision to seeif he’d ever feel the same way about you, but you could never bring yourself todo it, no matter how curious you got. Finding out for sure that this feelingwas a one-way street would end the fantasy. It would be a breach of trust aswell.

Kylo didn’t want you wasting your energy on him by askingyou to tell him what would happen in his future, not that you wouldn’t havebeen happy to do it for him. In exchange for the gift, though definitely not ofequal value, you took a peek at something for him.

“Keep working on hiding your intentions, Kylo.” You toldhim. “You’re nearly there. You’ll get it soon. Ask one of the Knights.”

As time went on, Kylo continued to sneak in visits. Throughpractice and meditation, you’d actually started picking up the technique he’dbeen trying to teach you. True to your vision, he’d mastered it, though theonly use he’d had for it so far was to hide the fact he’d been seeing you. TheSupreme Leader never bothered to double check with you to see if Kylo had beenkeeping away from you. He didn’t believe you had it in you to deceive him likethat.

Kylo definitely had an influence on you. Before you met him,you never would have lied to Snoke, now you had a small rebellious streak. Tiny,but still present. Had he bothered to look into your mind a while ago, he’dhave seen your betrayal, but it was too late now.

You hadn’t mastered the technique, but it took some effortto look past the wall you could build up to shield your mind. Kylo wasconfident you were safer now with this protection. There wasn’t anyway he couldhave known otherwise.

Snoke had been made aware long ago about how he would die,close combat, which was what the Praetorian Guard had specialised in, but thatwas as much as he knew.

That night, like most nights, your dreams heavily featuredKylo. It was a reoccurring dream. A field with blooming flowers, a scene you’dnever seen but felt nostalgic for. Both of you dressed in clothes you’d neverseen outside of your dreams. Always smiling. That was one thing you didrecognise from reality. You got the impression he didn’t smile a lot outside ofhis visits. It was nice to believe he was saving them for you, but you’d preferif he was always happy, and not just when he was with you. He deservedhappiness.

It was a simple dream, but it was a nice place to escape to.This night it changed. Snoke was there. He shouldn’t have been there. Kylo wasenraged by his intrusion. A black mist enveloped the beautiful field and thethrone room took its place. Hatred poured from Kylo and then it happened. Youjolted awake, the final fragments of your vision faded from your sight. Snoke’sbody in pieces.

This was bad. No one could know about this. You just had toact naturally because the thought of what Snoke would do to Kylo if he foundout was too painful to bear.

The Supreme Leader picked up on it almost immediately. Thesecond you met with him in the throne room he could tell there was somethingoff with you. Without a moment’s hesitation he was in your mind. You had toprotect Kylo.

The wall went up. This was the main reason Snoke kept youaround. There was no guarantee you’d have a vision about this, he’d try toforce you to have one many times when he first obtained you but neversucceeded. Now you had the information he desired, but there was no way youwere going to let him have it.

You could feel him inside your head. It was never acomfortable experience. He saw it. There was a barrier blocking him fromsomething. He needed to know.

Probing deeper, your brain felt like it was on fire. Diggingfurther, you felt pieces of your mind being torn apart and ripped open. Snokebecame paranoid. You were hidingsomething. That couldn’t be possible. You were barely force sensitive, you hadno training, there was no way you could hide something from him. It didn’t makesense to him but he had to keep looking.

“Show me what you’re hiding and this will end.” Snokesnarled.

Memories you didn’t know even existed were ripped violentlyfrom your head. Every time you focused on something to distract yourself, Snokeslashed at it, destroying it and continued his assault.

The agony was too much. You were fading. Your mind wasshattered and could no longer support your body. Losing consciousness, you fellto the ground blacking out.

You were back in your bed when you came to. A dark figurerushed to your side. It took a moment before you realised it was Kylo as hescooped you up and held you tightly against his broad chest.

“Kylo…?” You began, your voice croaky and cracking.

“Just relax.” He cooed. “Don’t try to speak, just rest.”

“I… I ache. I hurt in the weirdest places. What did he do tome?” You asked.

“You’ll be alright. You just need time.” Kylo said.

A tear escaped your eye. Snoke had broken you. He hadn’t wonthough, Kylo was here with you, that was a good sign the Supreme Leader hadn’tfound what he was looking for. Gently resting in Kylo’s arms, you knew the partof your mind that you’d tried to hide was still intact.

“What happened in there?” He asked. “Why wouldn’t you justgive him the information he wanted? What are you hiding from him?”

“It’s safer if you don’t know.”

Finding the small amount of strength, you had left in yourbody, you wrapped your arms over Kylo’s shoulders and held on as tightly as youcould. Kylo’s arms snaked around you, one hand on your lower back, the othersoftly raking through your hair. He pulled you away from him slightly a fewtimes. Each time, he looked like there was something he needed to say, but justcouldn’t find the words.

“I’m going to kill him.” He spoke softly into your neck. “I’llkill him for doing this to you.”

You pulled away from him to look directly into his eyes.Those honey-brown eyes looked as hurt as you felt. He drew you back in, guidingyour forehead to his. His breath was warm and soothing, you closed your eyesand let your face melt into his, cheek to cheek.

Kylo turned so slightly, capturing your lips in his. Hishands gripped you tighter, afraid he’d lose you. Your weak fingers grasped athim to reassure him that he never would. You kissed him back as hard as youwere capable of, if only this had happened sooner, if only this had happenedwhen you could really show him how much he meant to you all this time. Still,his pink lips were soft. Softer than you’d ever imagined. Kylo could kiss awayyour pain any day.

“… I know.”

[stahvie]

honestly, I bet Kylo does those obnoxious dad sneezes that you can still hear from like 3 blocks away

[stahvie]

honestly, I bet Kylo does those obnoxious dad sneezes that you can still hear from like 3 blocks away

[stahvie]

I hear requests are open! Would it be possible for a Doctor Strange x artist! Reader, in which they meet in the city spontaneously. If not, totally fine! Hope you’re having a lovely day!

This got buried in my inbox but I’ve loved the idea since I first saw it so I had to go looking for it. Sorry it took so long!

Word Count: 1551

If there was one thing being an artist had led you toappreciate, it was colour. Most city dwellers would say city life was dull,basically just concrete and stone, they made it seem bleak. You saw beyond thatto the pops of colour that made the city beautiful. The weathered band postersplastered on walls. The pride flag that hung in the window of your neighboursapartment across the road. The tiny weed patch that lived in the crack of thesidewalk outside your building that just wouldn’t die no matter how many timesthe woman next door drowned it in weedkiller.

Colour was life for you but you wanted to prove it wasn’tthe only thing that made the city beautiful. You set yourself a challenge; you’donly work in black and white. If you could make the city look good inmonochrome, maybe that would help people see how amazingly colourful it reallywas.

So far, a few days into this challenge, your results… well,they weren’t what you were hoping. If you were brutally honest with yourself,everything you’d produced so far was a little boring.

Today would be different. You dragged yourself out of bedbefore the sun had a chance to wake up for the day. Once you’d gathered yourpreferred materials, you set off for the park. It almost felt a little likecheating to use the park since it was already beautiful, but with the addedchallenge of trying to capture the sunrise, an event famous for beingcolourful, you felt like it evened it out a little.

You plonked yourself down on the grass just inside theentrance of the park, and tucked into the bagel and hot beverage you’d boughtfrom the 24/7 donut shop on an adjoining street. Their bagels were amazing andtheir donuts were even better. Whenever you were in the area it was usually astruggle to convince yourself you weren’t actually hungry, but this wasbreakfast, so that was different!

The sky was starting to get lighter. Sunrise was close. Youretrieved everything you needed and waited. The one thing you hadn’tanticipated however, was the weather. Clouds that had hidden behind the tallbuildings in the distance began to crawl across the sky. You tried to capturesomething, anything, before the sky was almost completely hidden, but theresult wasn’t anything you’d want to show to anyone. How disappointing.

It probably wasn’t your brightest moment. Greyscale sunrise,what were you thinking? Still, at least the clouds didn’t look like they weregoing to rain, and the sky above you was still pretty clear.

Not far from where you sat, the air seemed to spark. You’dnever witness the air spontaneously bursting into flames and didn’t really knowhow to react, you just sat there stunned. The orange spark quickly took shape.An oval. From it a man appeared.

“Morning.” The stout man said as he walked past you.

“…Morning…” You answered back.

This wasn’t a normal thing… right? Your eyes left thestranger as he exited the park and focused on the sparkly thing. A portal?

“Wong!” Shouted the portal.

Another man appeared. Silver accented his dark hair, and hisfacial hair was meticulously groomed. He was older than you, but that wasn’t a dealbreaker; the man was handsome.

“Wong! Sprinkles! Pink ones! Wong?” Your eyes were stuck onthis new stranger, but from the look on his face, it appeared like the first manhad heard him. Now just realising he had an audience, he turned to you. “Hey.”

His eyes crinkled as he smiled at you. Ugh, he was attractive.You managed a small ‘Hey’ andreturned his smile with a soft one of your own. The following silence lingeredfor a little too long.

“They do good donuts down there. Have you…?” He began toask. You raised the bag your bagel came in to answer him. “Ah, you have.”

Realising a substantial conversation wasn’t about to occur,he nodded a silent goodbye to you and disappeared back into the portal. Onceyou’d mentally returned to your body, you noticed just how beautiful the orangesparks were. Now, more than ever, you regretted the decision to only work inblack and white.

You packed your things up and rushed back home. You werechanging the challenge. Monochrome pictures with pops of orange. Rushing backto the park with the orange pigment now safely in your bag you found you weretoo late. The portal was gone.

For the next few days you sketched down any out of placeorange things you could find. None of them had the same kind of oomph. You werejust going to have to track him down.

“They call him DoctorStrange.” “How can you not know who that is?” “Have you been living under arock?” and other similar things poured from the mouths of your friends, allwith incredulous looks on their faces. Honestly, you’d lost track of all those kinds of people, the ones thatsaved the world. You were thankful of course, but there were a lot, and morejust seemed to pop up every week.

You had a lead now. It wasn’t long before you were stalkingthe man who could generate orange sparkles from his hands. Never getting tooclose, you captured the gorgeous glow Strange was able to produce. Like any bigcity, there were plenty of weirdos around, you felt lucky that artists rankedlow on the weird scale. Most people ignored you as you snuck around trying tocapture his orange with your own, however, you lost track of Strange a fewtimes due to the occasional nosy person trying to look over your shoulder atyour art.

While tailing him you’d discovered that Strange or Wongwould sometimes visit the donut shop in the morning. Lately it had been Wong, butthat didn’t matter too much. What was really important was recreating the magicthey produced. You were really getting the hang of the intricate details andwere finally happy with the way you could now capture the glow.

Once again, beating them to the park, you got your own donutto tide you over until the sparks started. You sat a fair distance away fromthe area that their portal opened, you didn’t want to attract attention toyourself.

Right on schedule the portal appeared. Strange emerged. Youwere surprised but you assumed Wong had gone too many times in a row, so it wasStrange’s turn. He didn’t seem to notice you. That’s fine, you didn’t want toembarrass yourself with this crush you were having. Wait, no, not crush.Admiration. You just appreciated everything he did, it had nothing to do withhow he looked. Your cheeks burned, calling you out in your lie.

You got to work onyour first picture of the day. It was slightly foggy this morning making theportal eerily beautiful. Strange’s magic was an artform of its own. You wishedyou knew how it worked.

Strange was on his way back so you didn’t have much time.The problem was, when he was in view, it was a lot harder to concentrate. Youprobably would have had a lot more finished pieces if he had just been a tadless attractive.

Flicking your eyes back towards Strange just in time to seehim wrestle awkwardly with the cardboard cupholder from the donut shop. Itlooked as though he was trying to free his drink to take a sip, instead itescaped his grasp and fell to the ground.

Strange stood in place. He stared at the unfortunate puddlehe’d created. What a terrible way to start the day. He stretched his hand outin its direction and produced a green light.

What.

In.

The.

Hell…?!

“Green?!” You shouted. “Green? Are you serious right now?!”

Strange had never given the slightest hint that he couldproduce green magic in all the time you’d stalked him. If you’d known, youwould have brought green with you! How could he drop this bomb on you?

“Seriously? Green?” You got up, collecting your thingshastily, and marched over to him. “I didn’t know I had to bring green along!All I have is this orange. All this time and now… Green?!”

Strange wasn’t ready for confrontation, and neither were youto be fair, but you’d started it and now you were committed. He stared at you,confusion on his face, outrage on yours. For a moment the two of you stoodthere in silence not really knowing what to do next, you in his personal space,him leaning away slightly. Thankfully, Strange reacted first.

“You’re the one that’s been following me.” He said takingyour half-drawn artwork and replacing it with his goods from the donut shop. “Thisis really good. You’re very good.”

“Thanks.” You said after some hesitation.

Strange returned your picture to you and took back his food.He turned back to the puddle. Green runes spread up his forearm and in no timeat all, the drink was back to its original state in his hand.

“You didn’t see that.” Strange smiled at you and made hisway back to the portal. “C’mon, I’ll show you more.”

[stahvie]

I’ll keep you warm pt. 13

Masterlist    First     Previous     Next

Pairing: Kylo x reader

Word Count: 2581

Summary: I just remembered I said explanations would happen in this part. Instead of that, it’s a cave adventure!

“Go back to your ship, [Y/N].” Kylo called towards you, his voice distorted and emotionless from the vocoder in his helm.

“Please, just let me explain.” You pleaded still trapped by the force. “At least let me help with the mission.”

Kylo sighed. He released you until you attempted to take another step towards him and he locked you in place again.

“If you want to help then leave and stay out of the way. You’re not needed here.” With that, Kylo raised you slightly from the ground and levitated you backward until you were once more outside of the cave. You were thankful he was a little gentler and more considerate than the last time he’d moved you with the force.

You stood there conflicted, not entirely sure what you should do. A small part of you wanted to obey, but your desire to be vindicated was overpowering. Once Kylo had disappeared from view you slowly and quietly crept through the cave after him.

You were aware that you probably weren’t going to catch up to him, your pace was cautious so you wouldn’t alert him to your presence, and he was most likely being carried by his usual confident strides. That’s why, when turning a corner, you were surprised to see him waiting inches from where you stood.

Your hands instinctively rose to your face to block a gasp from escaping your mouth, only for them to instead clumsily clash against your helmet. Kylo just looked down at you with disappointment. You assumed. It was difficult to tell with his mask on.

“I’m serious, [Y/N], I don’t want you here.” There was no emotion in Kylo’s voice. You were unsure how to react. If he’d given you anger, disappointment, frustration, you’d know how to respond, but he was giving you nothing.

Kylo turned away from you and disappeared further into the icy cave. He’d obviously known you’d follow him before, so surely, he must know there wouldn’t be anything he could say to deter you from going after him. You didn’t just want to get the truth out, you wanted to be there for him. This mission was personal to him, if it didn’t go well, you wanted to be there to comfort him.

Refusing to turn back, you carefully chased after Kylo through the slippery passageways. His longer legs would be increasing the distance between you so you needed to be a little less cautious if you were to have any chance of reaching him.

You removed the datapad from your armour and picked up the pace. It wasn’t long before you figured out how to move your feet in order to not slip slightly with each step. Your feet landed confidently against the ice as you began to catch up.

You could hear him now. He wasn’t too far away. You loaded up one of the files Vail had sent you in preparation, when the next step broke through the ice that you hadn’t noticed had become dangerously thin in places. You managed to take another step before your first foot had sunk too low into the abyss below. Clambering for the edge of the luckily not-too-wide hole, you managed to find something to grip onto but lost the datapad in the process. Too scared to be upset, your survival became your focus.

Within moments, as though he’d sensed this would happen, Kylo was in front of you, pulling you up to safety.

“This is exactly what I’m talking about!” Kylo hissed. You opened your mouth to thank him, or apologise, probably both, but didn’t have the chance before he continued. “Just… Just stay close and do what I say. I mean it.”

The tone in Kylo’s voice was intimidating, you weren’t brave enough to refuse. Kylo grabbed you by the hand, dragging you up to your feet, and led you roughly through the cave. The two of you remained in silence, it just didn’t feel appropriate to talk as he guided you around the weak spots on the cave floor.

The grip on your hand was tight. This wasn’t like other times he’d taken your hand. Your eyes watered wondering how everything had gone wrong so suddenly. Sure, things had never really run that smoothly between the two of you, and you were always second guessing his feelings for you, but it felt like this was the least he’d cared about you since just after you both crashed on that planet. Still, he had just saved you, so that had to mean something.

Out of nowhere, Kylo stopped. He pushed you down to squat behind a large rock that you were about to pass. Kylo removed his helmet, so he could look you in the eyes.

“This is important, [Y/N], I need you to listen to me, and I need to you to do what you’re told.” There was hesitation in Kylo’s eyes which seemed to disappear when he removed your helm. “Look me in the eyes and promise me.”

“Please, first I just need to explain…” you started before Kylo wrapped his fingers around the sides of your face interrupting you. Firm but gentle.

“No, [Y/N], you don’t…” Kylo sighed before trying again. “You’re not understanding. Stay here. Stay quiet. Stay hidden. Do this for me. Promise me you’ll wait right here.”

You gave him a small nod as he pulled his hands away. Whatever was going on, Kylo definitely made it seem critical that you weren’t there. It’d be nice to have an explanation but it was apparent that wasn’t going to happen. Whatever Kylo had let you read about the plan, it didn’t include this.

“I promise.” You said.

Kylo, confident that he could trust you, replaced your helm on your head and followed suit with his own.

“Keep that on. Just in case.” He said and continued off deeper into the cave.

Jiggling your helmet a little so it sat in place properly, you pushed away the thought that he was abandoning you. It didn’t feel like you were his favourite person at the moment, but it wasn’t like him to heartlessly leave someone to die alone in a cave… at least, not if that someone was you.

After a moment, in the distance, you heard the echoes of voices breaking the silence. It was difficult to tell which direction it was coming from as it reverberated off the icy walls. There hadn’t been any other ships at the cave’s entrance so there couldn’t be anyone further in than you except for Kylo.

Kylo hadn’t left instructions for what to do if this happened, but you assumed he’d probably get you to hide. Carefully, you made you snaked around a few large rocks looking for a spot that would keep you hidden from all obvious angles but couldn’t find anything. What you did find, however, was a large cavern, and in the distance Kylo was walking up to two other people.

Kriff. You’d definitely broken your promise to stay back. You reasoned with yourself that if you went no further, it still sort of counted.

You could now tell that these two people were the owners of the voices, but still couldn’t tell what they were saying. Scanning the area, you noticed they’d come from another tunnel and were converging on a huge frosted metal wall. It seemed like the kind of place someone might hide a relic, but who were the other two?

Oh. That giant one was probably Garric. Saima was probably the smallest one. No wonder Kylo didn’t want you going with him if he was meeting up with them. Your insides churned with jealousy. Why was it so easy for him to take their side in all of this?

You watched on in silence as Kylo moved closer to the wall and raised his arm at it. No doubt using the force, you deduced. Take that, Vail, there’s a new super sleuth in town… in cave?

The wall rumbled violently and disappeared into the ground slowly to reveal a strange machine. You’d never seen anything quite like it. There was a small compartment, a console below it, and either side were two things that looked like bacta tanks with doors on the front, but instead of bacta, they each contained a person. They looked like they were stuck in place, both of them with their hands on a small control panel.

Even from this distance, there was no denying it, those masks were unmistakable. Two of the Knights were found.

Kylo motioned in Garric’s direction and then at the left tank. Each of the men retrieved a Knight from a tank and carefully set them down on the ground back near Saima. Free from their confinement, neither of them moved. You couldn’t imagine how hard it must be for Kylo, finally finding them but being too late to save them.

The Knight furthest from you lurched forward, sputtering and though they were taking in air for the first time. They ripped their helmet off and knelt with their face close to the ground. You could hear them loudly gasping from all the way back where you were.

Seeing the first Knight springing back to life, Kylo tore the mask off the other Knight, and gripped their face between his fingers. It wasn’t long before both Knights were both conscious, much to your relief. You’d never met them, but they were important to Kylo so they were important to you.

They were recovering pretty quickly, and from the way they occasionally pointed at parts of the machine, you assumed they were talking about what happened. Kylo prowled over to the main console and beckoned for Saima to join him.

Kylo removed his helm, and she matched him. Even though you couldn’t see, you just knew she was giving him gooey eyes as he spoke to her. Hussy…

He wrapped an arm around her shoulder. Gross. Maybe you should have stayed back, watching Kylo being affectionate with her made you feel the urge to be sick. As he walked her toward the tank she began to resist and struggle to get away from his strong arms. It was no use. He easily overpowered her, shoved her into the tank, and closed the door behind her.

It looked like she was screaming, banging on the transparisteel, though you couldn’t hear anything from where you were. Even Garric was smart enough to understand what was going to happen next. He slowly backed away until Kylo turned to him. He tried to run but the force stopped him. His helm was ripped away from his head by something invisible. Very obviously unconcerned about his wellbeing, Kylo sent him flying into the empty tank, locking him in as well.

Kylo stalked back and forth in front of the tanks. He threw his helm to the ground. Whatever he was saying, he didn’t have the patience to wait. He ignited his saber and continued to pace. Apparently, it was a hard decision for them to choose between whatever would happen to them inside the tank or facing Kylo’s wrath. He stopped and faced them.

“Do it!” He shouted. It was the first thing you could clearly understand since they’d begun talking.

The guards turned to their consoles and stopped. There was no more movement from them and Kylo, appearing to be satisfied with the outcome, put away his saber.

The Knights looked to as though they’d completely recovered as they joined Kylo at the main console. They pointed at the console. Kylo pointed in your direction. A decision was made. It looked like they were prodding the little glowing buttons, then the small compartment in front of their faces popped open.

As soon as Kylo withdrew whatever was inside, a red gas began billowing from the machine into the air and occupied tanks. The three backed away, put on their helmets, and ran toward you. The large wall that had disappeared into the ground returned to its original position and hid the machine away again. Kylo stopped in his tracks, turned to the other tunnel and ran in its direction, and the Knights paused. Before you could feel betrayed that he was leaving you behind, he made a huge dragging motion from the roof to the ground and collapsed the second tunnel. They continued toward you.

You ducked and ran back to where Kylo had asked you to stay out of sight, and waited for them.

“Who’s the girl?” Said a voice from out of sight. The vocoder in their mask created a scratchy, rusted sound.

“Later.” Said Kylo as he emerged into view.

Kylo took your hand to guide you through the cave. You looked back to take a look at the Knights. You’d seen some of them on the Supremacy, a while before they’d gone missing but neither of the masks looked familiar. Not too far in the distance, the red gas was spreading. You didn’t want to wait around to see what it did.

When Kylo felt confident there was enough space between the group and the gas, he stopped to collapse a part of the tunnel you’d already been through. There was something so primal about the way he controlled the force. Not knowing much about it, you weren’t sure if his snarl was a requisite, but it suited him.

Past the part of the cave with the thin ice and safe from the gas, the four of you took your time making your way out. Ren led the way, the Knights close behind him, you followed behind a few paces back.

With everything that had been happening, the way you’d been set up and what had just happened with the machine, you wanted to use this time to plan out all the things you wanted to say and ask about, but found it difficult. The Knights were distracting. As you walked, one would lean over to the other, they’d both look back at you, the other one would lean in and they’d look at you again. There was no way Kylo had a chance to talk about you to them so they must have just been speculating. A bit rude. If there wasn’t a lingering tension between you and Kylo, you would have been happy to answer any of their questions.

You left the cave and made your way to the Silencers where the four of you stopped.

“You two in that one, [Y/N], with me.” Kylo said heading for his ship.

“Wait…” Now that you were so close to being alone with Kylo, you became nervous and unsure of yourself. “Can you both fly?”

They nodded. You suggested that you and Kylo would fly a Knight each. Someone would have to fly back Saima and Garric’s ships. Your arrangement just made more sense.

“Their ships were retrieved shortly after they landed. You’re riding with me.” Kylo said.

Well, it was worth a shot. You took your time heading to the ship, the longer you could stretch this out the better. You knew you hadn’t betrayed him, and even if you couldn’t prove it straight away, Vail still had copies of the proof, but whatever just happened to Saima and Garric… it was harsh. You didn’t want that for yourself. On top of that, the psych eval you’d just bailed on was probably the start of your punishment. Kylo wasn’t going to be too thrilled you got out of it.

Tags: @marvelanimelover @sophiatomlinson23 @secretlygrantaire @m4shtyx @18crazybutcutealsopsycho @beautifulbows924 @whataloadofmalarkey @the-rain-pours-down @ghostslikemydoubts @pabegay1 @ymariejp @denisethestrange @bootstrapt3hmnk @mariska-emilbee @dank-lucille @frickfrackpattywhacktictac @yessy2012 @quierdoofthestars @voila-im-a-trashcan @kittenxnicole @mauvemountains @krylo-rxn @delanie-spam-blog @fralackles

It’s been aaaages, so lemme know if you wanna be taken off the tag list :)

[stahvie]

Do you write smut?

[stahvie]

Hey! Love you and your amazing series and fics. So the only person I will ask is you. Can I request clumsy reader headcanons with Kylo please...

I hope you don’t mind if I use this as practice to get my groove back :)

 Kylo first notices you when you take a cornertoo quickly, colliding with him.

In a rush, and not the first time, you bounceoff him and continue rushing off to where you urgently needed to be

“Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!” - You as you run off

Whoever that was, they were sturdy so you weren’tworried you’d hurt them

Whoever youwere, you had some nerve!

Kylo’s unsure how to react. No one ever seemedso unruffled after an incident like this.

The hell just happened?

Later you’re so close to missing the elevator

Not on your watch!

You lunge inside just as the doors close, but,aw kriff!

There’s Kylo and the snooty ginger one

You shouldn’t be in here

Now you’re trapped

Head down, apologise, and tuck yourself away inthe corner to make yourself small

But you’re stuck in place

Oh no! It’s the force!

Oh no… the bottom of your shirt got caught in thedoors

You panic and hit the button for a closer floorso you can try to make a clean getaway

Kylo wonders if you’re always this bad athumaning

Definitely gonna keep an eye on that cute,clumsy one

Another day, another fight with the faulty caffmachine

The creamer’s gone everywhere

You’ve got a fresh little circular burn markfrom the nozzle at the base of your thumb

And when you recoiled from the pain, you droppedyour cup and it rolled under the table

You crawl under to retrieve it

Now someone’s already stepped up to use themachine. They coulda waited a minute…

Ugh, just one day where you don’t mildlyembarrass yourself would be nice

Cup obtained, you reappear from under the tableand bonk your noggin

You’re just getting all of the clumsy for theday out of your system early

Pleeease let that be the case

Surprisingly, everyone’s averting their eyes

That never happens…

…Oh… because those feet you saw from under thetable belonged to Kylo…

Well, that makes sense

He takes the empty cup from your hand andreplaces it with a full disposable cup and motions for you to go

You hesitate because actually that cup wasspecifically yours, you got it the first time you were granted shore leave, andyou’d just rather not leave it behind…

You begin to reach for a lid for the cup

But, oh, okay, probably best you left… this isKylo Ren after all

Just focus on walking out of there like a normalperson

Except you clip the door

Doors = Your number one enemy

Thankfully, you don’t get a drop of caff on you

The floor, however…

You navigate around the huge puddle and flee

Hopefully Kylo didn’t see you just essentiallythrow the drink he made for you all over the ground

He definitely did.

The rest of your morning actually goes prettysmoothly and you’re getting so much work done

Then a gloved hand places your cup, full ofcaff, on the console beside you

You look up at Kylo, thankful, but also confusedbecause what ?the frick??is happening???

You thank him and raise the caff to your lipsbecause you’re not about to be rude

His fingers gently curl around your wrist tostop you

“That’s still really hot…” He says confused butamused

It’s hard to tell if you’re flustered because he’sKylo… or because he’s Kylo

You’re hopeless… He’s gonna have to keep an eyeon you

And that’s in no way just an excuse to be closerto you

(it absolutely is)

You start to find that your fingers have grownclumsier and drop stuff more frequently

Things just kinda seem to fly out of their ownaccord

Kylo’s just waiting to see how long it takes foryou to figure out he’s messing with you

When he walks with you he’s always nudging youfrom one side to his other

You don’t really get why until he forgets onetime and you take the corner of a console to the hip

Well obviously you can’t even be trusted to walk

It’s just saferif he carries you, it’s got nothing to do with the little squeak that escapes yourlips when he lifts you by surprise…

But only in private though, he’s got an image tomaintain

His favourite method to transport you is tosling you over his shoulder

Though he loves feeling of your arms cuddlingaround him when he piggybacks you

Kylo’s tried to kiss you so many times but youalways end up colliding heads

You’re so oblivious

Like, what’s Kylo doing so close to you anyway??

Poor guy is just frustrated. He knows how youfeel, even without the force, so why can’t you tell how he feels?

He’s gotta find a way to make it more obviouswhat he’s doing

During a silent moment, his warm hands gentlykeep your head in place and he leans in

Confused, you pull back

“What are you doing?”

“What are youdoing?”

“Trying tokiss you!”

“…oh!” The penny drops

Maybe a little too excited, you go in for thekiss

Your noses bop but he kinda expected that fromyou

You figured with practice that would stop happening,but it never does

Kylo doesn’t mind, he thinks you’re adorable

Many smiley kisses

He lets you sit in on his training sessions

You’re pretty sure it’s just to show off justhow un-clumsy he is

He doesn’t coddle you

Kylo wants to keep you safe but knows you’d survivewithout him

Not that he likes the idea of being without you

You never feel insecure with him

Any tiny scars, burns or bruises you have, arenothing compared to his

You think the marks on his skin are just proofof how amazing he is

He thinks yours are just there to stop you frombeing too perfect

You’re flawless to him

[stahvie]

I know what you’re thinking

“Who even is that on my dash rn?”

I’m back!... and I’m so sorry for disappearing again, especially since I think I’d only just began to post stuff again just before this disappearance.

My inbox was such a mixed bag. To everyone who sent me kind and sweet things: I love you, let’s run away and get married. I’m not a great kisser but I’m enthusiastic! To the buttnuggets who sent me less than nice things: Eat a bucket of moldy wangs :)

So, something cool/terrifying/startling/expensive happened; my computer exploded! Sort of. It went weird, and then just as me and my (luckily IT nerd) partner got in close to see what it’s deal was, there was a loud bang and a whole lotta smoke.

Basically, I was away because I needed to save up for new PC parts, I was supporting my stepmum through her cautionary chemo (things are looking good!), I’ve been working on writing a novel (it’s been fun writing for myself), and then also I almost came back sooner but stayed away out of pettiness for the mean peeps in my inbox. Oh! Also I had people staying in my spare room and I don’t think I’ve ever been so barely functional. Thanks for that, anxiety! <3

Buuut here, I am again. I decided to come back out of spite for the meanies but block them because who needs that kinda negativity. I feel like most of my decisions are made out of pettiness.

Ugh this is so much longer than I’d anticipated...

The bad news: I lost a lot of what I had planned for IKYW. I’m gonna have a read through it and try to remember where I was trying to take it but it may just be one or two more parts. Besides fixing my PC, I got a shitty cheap laptop just for writing (and as a netflix machine) so I can keep my writing and ideas safe on multiple computers and externals ;D I’m still just floored by the love you guys have given it. It was just supposed to be a silly little one-off but your encouragement has meant so much to me.

[stahvie]

Helloo, I just wanted to pop in and say that I really like your writing and that it's helped me distract myself from some rough mental health patches and anxiety attacks of late so thank you^^ If you have time please may I request a short fic with my space bean Kylo comforting the reader during a random panic attack? Thank you!🖤

I’m glad I could help, I’m just sorry I had such a long break where I wasn’t able to write, otherwise I would have got to this much sooner. I hope you’re doing better now, or at least staying strong :)

And I just wanna say before I get into it, this is just based on my experience with anxiety and panic attacks. I’m sure everyone feels things differently and has their own methods to deal with it, this is just what tends to work for me... though I don’t have a Kylo...

Word Count: 1309

Warnings: Panic attacks and anxiety

The all too familiar feeling of dread began to hit you inwaves and you begged your brain not to do this. Not here. Not surrounded byyour peers and superiors. You couldn’t stay there so you excused yourself asyour body became taken over by the feeling of static and white noise.

As you made your way back to the safety of your quarters itfelt like everyone’s eyes were on you. You tried to reassure yourself thateveryone was more concerned with themselves, they probably didn’t even notice you,but your body was no longer responding to reason. You pressed onward,determined not to make a scene, to not be seen crying in public, and gettingcolder by the second.

By the time you made it back to the privacy of your room itfelt as though all heat had escaped you, and you stood there, a shivering,wobbly mess with no idea what to do except cry. You were in pain, both mentallyand physically, you felt like vomiting, and began to seriously consider goingto the medbay. This must have been how people felt before they died of somethingreally terrible.

It felt like an eternity had passed before your door buzzedopen and the man who you shared a living space with walked up to you with asympathetic smile.

“What happened?” Kylo asked while wrapping his arms aroundyou from behind so you wouldn’t feel overwhelmed by his presence but stilltrying to give you some warmth.

You attempted to answer but the chittering of your teethproved too difficult to overcome so you just shook your head. He was well awareby now that while sometimes these attacks could be triggered by something,usually they came from out of the blue, caused by nothing in particular. Kyloaccepted your nonverbal answer and placed a soft kiss against your temple.

“Why don’t you try a hot shower to warm yourself up?” Hespoke softly undoing your hair and letting it fall freely from its regulationbun.

“I guess…” You mumbled. Warm showers had always been prettyeffective in that regard, but despite that, you always panicked that you wouldn’tbe able to breathe through the steam. “If I’m not out in ten minutes, come andcheck up on me.”

“I will.”

“Just in case I pass out.”

“You won’t”

“But…”

“[Y/N], I promise you’ll be fine, and in the almost impossiblechance that you’re not, I’ll know straight away. I won’t let anything badhappen to you.” Kylo reassured you calmly while running his fingers throughyour hair.

“This is pretty bad.” You said pushing away from him,looking back with a pathetic smile.

“It’ll pass.” He called after you as you made your way tothe refresher.

Hot water fell over your body finally bringing back thewarmth that had previously abandoned you. The steam that swirled around yourhead was far more breathable than your anxiety had told you it would be.Despite that, your mind still raced, but you took a moment to really appreciatehow far Kylo had come in learning how to deal with your attacks.

The first time he’d seen you in this state he had no ideawhat he was doing. He’d throw facts at you, remind you that it was illogical,and tried too hard to find a cause when there was none. He’d meant well, thinkingif you saw reason you’d feel better, but afterward you’d explained to him thatit had only exacerbated things. Kylo had felt awful that he’d only made itworse, and since then he’d learnt to be more considerate of your feelings andto be gentler with you.

You didn’t want to leave the warm water, but it was only atemporary solution to just one symptom and you’d been in there for long enough.As soon as the water was off, the unwelcome chill washed through you again. Yougrabbed your towel and cursed past-[Y/N] for not having the foresight to bring awarm change of clothes into the refresher earlier.

Kylo had your back. You found your softest pyjamas drapedover the couch closest to the refresher and quickly put them on as you noticedhe was busying himself, setting something up over on the bed.

“What are you doing?” You asked curiously at what lookedlike a nest of blankets and a HoloTV resting on a desk by the end of the bed.

“I’ve got a plan. Come. Sit.” Kylo ushered you onto themiddle of the bed.

“Kylo, this isn’t going to work. I’ve tried to distractmyself by watching something but it never works.” You said solemnly. Youappreciated the thought, even though you remembered telling him previously thatit hadn’t worked, but the HoloTV just never managed to engage your mind enoughto use it as a successful distraction.

“I remember, but this might work better.” He said, remainingvague as he began to drape blankets over your shaking body. He reached underthe blankets to place something in your hidden hands and landed a kiss againstyour forehead. Kylo did something to the HoloTV and it loaded up a menu.

Kylo excused himself from the room and you took the opportunityto figure out what he’d given you. It was a controller. You traced your thumbsover the buttons and pressed one. The menu disappeared and a little man on atauntaun took its place. A short scene played out and soon you found you wereable to move the character, finding the controls to be pretty intuitive.

“It’s a remake of a game I played as a kid.” Kylo said as heremerged with a mug that billowed with steam. He carefully climbed onto the bedand wedged himself between you and the headboard. An arm stretched out in frontof you offering the beverage for your consumption.

“Thanks… but… my hands…” You said pushing them against the blankets,the controller still clutched between your fingers.

“I’ve got you covered.” He said as his other arm reachedaround to meet the mug and plopped a silicon straw into the liquid. “Probablystill a bit hot though.”

Kylo took a small sip and you could tell from the noise hemade behind you that it was indeed too hot. He leant over and abandoned the mugon one of the bedside tables.

“Is it okay if I try something?” He asked rubbing his hands incircles on your back.

You looked back nervously but nodded knowing he wouldn’t doanything if he thought there was a chance of making your attack any worse.

“Just try to relax.” He said as he pulled you closer so thatyou leant against him. Seeing his reflection in a nearby mirror, you saw thathis eyes were closed. He seemed to be concentrating very hard. You let youreyes fall closed just in case it helped. Nothing changed, but you still enjoyedthe way his hands were tenderly stroking though your hair again. “Any change?”

“No… sorry.” You replied timidly after a moment. “What wasthat supposed to be?”

“I’ve just… I’ve been looking into ways I can help you… withthe force. Not quite ready I guess.” He said, a little embarrassed that he hadn’tbeen able to succeed on his first attempt.

You blushed at the gesture, rested your head against hisshoulder, and rolled your face toward his so you could plant a kiss at his jaw.Your focus fell back onto the game Kylo had set up for you. It was actually apretty good distraction. You felt lucky to have someone who was so willing todrop what they were doing just to make sure you were okay. You weren’t okayyet, but thanks to Kylo, you knew you would be.

[stahvie]

hey beautiful...Ok so I was thinking, couldn't Kylo just read y/n's and Garrics mind to see what actually happened?

I was originally gonna put the explanation in part 12 but it woulda ended up being a crazy long chapter so don’t worry, chapter 13 is gonna clear that up.

[stahvie]

I’ll keep you warm pt. 12

Masterlist     First     Previous     Next

Pairing: Kylo x reader

Word Count: 2772

Summary: You’re stuck in the middle of one giant conspiracy

You couldn’t remember feeling more sorry for yourself than you did in this moment. Confined to your room, half draped over your bed. Waiting. Close to two hours had passed since you’d been found by Kylo being bombarded by Garric’s stank-breath, and not knowing what was going on was driving you mad.

You’d been told to wait in your quarters until you were ready to be dealt with. You had no idea what being “dealt with” entailed but you were praying it wouldn’t be something that involved removing you from the First Order, or worse, from Ren. If he’d just give you a chance to explain what happened.

There was an alert from your door to indicate someone was outside. You dragged yourself away from the bed, moved to the mirror in the refresher to quickly smooth down your hair, and then made your way to the door as a melodic knocking sounded from the other side.

As the door opened Lexan casually pushed past you to take a seat on your bed and Vail entered afterward preferring to sit on an actual chair. You closed the door behind them when you were sure there was no one else waiting to enter and stood in the middle of the room waiting for someone to say something.

“Well…?” You asked when it seemed like neither of the two guards were going to say anything. “How much trouble am I in? Am I fired? Oh stars, it’s not worse than that is it?”

“The only thing worse than that would be kissing Garric… but you already did that, didn’t you?” Lexan said with a sly smirk.

“It wasn’t like that.” You retorted. You were about to explain the situation when Vail cut you off.

“Although not generally encouraged, there aren’t solid rules against dating your peers.” Vail spoke aloofly. “If that was the only issue you wouldn’t have anything to worry about, but I believe we both know there’s more to it than that.”

“Uhhh…” Lexan’s eyes darted back and forth between you and Vail, confused. “Mind filling me in?”

It was clear Vail was just as observant as you’d suspected, but no, as close as you were to Lexan, you still didn’t feel like it was right to share this information. If it had only been about you, sure, but the Supreme Leader was involved so maybe it wasn’t really your place to say.

“Sorry, Lexan.” You shook your head softly, denying them further information. An idea formed in your mind. “Vail… I’m sure my lack of discretion last night probably confirmed your suspicions, but I was wondering if you could get to the bottom of this. I just… I dunno how this went so wrong.”

“It certainly does seem a little fishy.” Vail rose to his feet. He seemed amused, though you could tell it wasn’t because of the situation, but because he enjoyed digging into secrets. “I’ll see what I can do.”

He left and you slumped down next to Lexan on the bed.

“Yup… sure do enjoy not having a clue about what’s going on.” The guard said without frustration, just hoping to be informed.

“Lex, I can’t tell you… not everything at least. I didn’t kiss Garric. I’d never kiss Garric. He smooshed his face into mine. I’m not even sure he’s really with Saima…” You paused to collect your thoughts. “Truth is I’m absolutely smitten with someone else and I can’t say who.”

“[Y/N]…” Lexan turned to you so the two of you locked eyes. “…I’m flattered but I don’t like you like that.”

Confusion infected your face before Lexan’s face contorted into a grin. The smile was contagious, and even though you felt so emotionally drained, your mouth began to curl upwards too.

“Shut up.” You said landing a soft punch against their arm.

The two of you waited in your quarters until Lexan’s datapad chimed up, stating that you were both to head to the throne room.

The giant room was empty apart from the four people that were waiting for you to be delivered to them. The two of you took your places in line with Saima, Garric and Hux in front of the throne where the Supreme Leader sat. You couldn’t look him in the eye. Despite not having done anything wrong, not really, tears threatened to escape your eyes and you didn’t want Ren to see how weak you were.

The Supreme Leader stood, moved towards the line of your peers and began to pace, storming back and forth angrily. Still averting your eyes, you flinched every time the leather of his boots thundered against the ground. Occasionally he’d pause and somehow that felt worse since you couldn’t hear his anger but still knew it was still there.

“You.” Ren said stopping in his tracks and pointing to Garric. “Tell me what happened.”

“[Y/N] took me somewhere private so she could seduce me, Supreme Leader.”

Your eyes snapped towards the giant man. How could he lie like that? There was no way Kylo would believe the lie… right?

“And you?” Ren moved towards you, stopping just inches away so he could loom over you. “Is this correct?”

“No…” Scared, your voice was barely a whisper, but you continued. “Garric was waiting for me outside my quarters. He told me the plan had changed, that we were supposed to be guarding a deserter. Told me we’d be there for ages. Said Lexan and Vail had the next shift. Confided in me and made me think we shared things in common. He manipulated me...”

“Manipulated you?” Garric stepped out of line to roll his eyes at you. “The whole time you were trying to convince me why I should date you. I’ve been trying to get with Saima but I reckon she’s into someone else. Then you started crying and I caved and said I’d give you a chance. If anything, you manipulated me!”

“Do you know anything about this?” Kylo asked Lexan. When Lexan declined having any knowledge of the incident they were dismissed. Kylo then turned to Saima and asked her the same question.

“[Y/N] seemed to hate Garric from the moment she met him.” You breathed a small sigh of relief. You’d begun to suspect she was in on it, but now she had your back. “But there’s that thing people say about love and hate… about it not being so different or hate turning into love… or something like that. She confronted me last night, drunk out of her mind and jealous that I was talking to Garric. She thought I was with him, but like Garric said, my heart lies elsewhere.”

Saima looked up at the Supreme Leader with big doe eyes. You felt sick. If only Lex hadn’t been dismissed, you’d have someone on your side. Or would you? You were beginning to question where you stood with anyone now, but surely, Lexan wasn’t also in on this?

“If I may, Supreme Leader…” Hux butted in once the dark-haired man began to pace again. “I have the security footage of the holding cells if you’d like to review them.”

Kylo stopped in front of Hux and motioned for him to playback the footage. It was sped up but it clearly displayed the two of you casually talking, eventually hugging, and then being caught kissing.

“Why is there no sound?” Ren asked.

“Ah yes,” Hux adjusted his stance, displaying the confidence he found in himself when proud that nothing happened on the ship without him knowing about it. “The previous cameras had malfunctioned last week. The usual cameras couldn’t be replaced with the same of their kind as they’ve all been installed in the areas of the ship that are being repaired. As the holding cells are not currently in use, inferior cameras have been installed in the meantime.”

“Not currently in use?” You challenged Hux in an accusatory tone. “We were guarding a deserter… she’d defected to the Resistance. She was the whole reason we were there!”

Garric shrugged when Kylo turned to look at him for confirmation.

“I can bring up footage of the cell the two of them were in front of.” Hux offered. The footage displayed nothing.

“There were stormtroopers!” You almost shouted. “Passing through… I mean, not seen from that angle, but they would have been caught by another camera. Plus, there was the guard that took her away…”

You were becoming less sure of yourself. If the footage had shown the cell to be empty, it was doubtful there’d be footage of someone being escorted away. All evidence seemed to prove that Garric’s story had been the truth, and the more you insisted you were being honest, the guiltier you appeared.

“Please, Supreme Leader, you have to believe me.” You pleaded.

“My sincerest apologies, Supreme Leader.” Hux shifted to make himself appear smaller. “She seems to be due for another psych evaluation. I’m not sure how someone so seemingly mentally ill managed to pass her previous one.

“I’m not… I’m fine… I’m not lying… you did something! They did something!” You pointed towards the conspiring three. “I’m not interested in Garric! There’s no way I could love him. I love y-“

“Enough!” Ren yelled. You could feel the rage radiating from him. The way he looked at you, you’d never seen him like this. Whatever was in store for you after this, it was no where near as scary as he was right now.

You wanted to throw up. To melt into the floor and disappear completely. If only Kylo would take a moment to breathe, but he felt betrayed and embarrassed.

“Kylo, please…” You begged, reaching a timid arm out towards him.

“Get out!” Ren shouted, launching you towards the doors. You skidded across the floor, finally coming to a stop just shy of the doors, and looked back at him, more hurt emotionally than physically. “I said get out!”

The command was directed at the others as well as you. You tried to pick yourself up as quick as you could so the others wouldn’t make it in time to ride the elevator down with you, but you weren’t fast enough. While you had defeat plastered across your face, the other three were smug in their victory… although that was just the way Hux normally looked.

You had a lot of free time over the next few days. The schedule had been changed so you no longer had Ren duty. You spent all your time sulking in your quarters wondering when you’d be demoted. Lexan would stop by from time to time, trying to convince you to leave your room, bringing you food when you refused to do so, and trying their best to get you to shower because, dang, you were getting a bit whiffy.

“I believe you.” Vail said, joining Lex in your room almost a week after the incident.

Just as he normally did, Vail had been keeping a low profile while looking into what had really happened. He’d found his way into the security system and found the truth. You weren’t crazy, the footage that Kylo had been shown had been a recording of a previous day that had been refiled so that it was allocated to the day of the incident.

“This footage…” He said pulling up a recording that displayed the long-limbed girl in the cell. “This footage is of two months from now.”

“How can there be footage of the future?” Lexan asked. Vail raised his brows, proud of his find.

“It’s all here.” Vail flicked though different recordings. “All two months away but a week in the past. Here’s the prisoner… Here’s the guard taking her away… And this one is Saima, on her datapad. She puts it away just as Garric kisses you.”

Your heart was racing. This was just what you needed to clear your name. You’d hug him, but you doubted he’d appreciate a hug from someone so stinky, plus you were a little paranoid that the timing would betray you and Kylo would catch you in someone else’s arms… again.

“This is great!” You practically squealed. “Let’s take this to the Supreme Leader!”

“We can’t…” Vail said. “We’re about to head out. We’re going down to Orto Plutonia to look for…”

“The Knights of Ren.” You said finishing his sentence. “I know, I helped get the details together. You’re all going without me?”

“Sorry, [Y/N].” Lexan’s eyes stared glumly at the floor. “I’ve been trying to find out whether you’re still a guard or not since you’re not being included in anything anymore but I can’t find a straight answer… neither can Vail!”

“It’s true.” Vail confirmed. “I did find that you’ve got that psych eval today though. With Doctor Thirtam… notorious for failing people for the smallest reasons… but at least now you know you’re innocent.”

The guards wished you luck since you’d need it and left your quarters so they could get ready for the mission you weren’t invited on. If you were going to convince Doctor Thirtam that you were in a good headspace, you figured it would help to look like you had your shit together too, so you jumped into the shower to clean yourself up.

Once you were out of the shower, you were making your way towards your wardrobe when you realised you’d received a message on your datapad. You tucked your towel in a little tighter to make sure it wouldn’t fall, not that there was anyone around to see, but it was still a little embarrassing when it happened regardless, and took a look at the message.

               I think these might help during your appointment. Good luck.

-Vail of the Ren’s Guard

Attached was the actual footage of the incident. Oh, you were so thankful you could kiss him. No. Scratch that. You were so thankful, you could give him a solid pat on the back. Completely plutonic.

There was no way you were going to show the doctor the footage, you had a better plan. You rushed over to the wardrobe and pulled out your cold weather armour. You dressed, popped your helmet on, and tucked your blaster and datapad into your clothes.

In your mind, this was supposed to play out like a big dramatic moment, running to your TIE Silencer, but with every heroic step you tried to make, the grip on the bottom of your cold-climate boots squeaked awkwardly against the polished floor.

Halfway there you hit a blockade. It came in the form of a skinny redhead.

“Not today, Hux!” You shouted and with pure professionalism, you whipped out your blaster, set it to stun, and aimed for the grumpy ginger. Direct hit.

No one knew what to do. Had they been aware that you might not be a guard anymore, they probably would have shot back at you, but you still looked the part and everyone knew they weren’t supposed to mess with Ren’s guards.

“Hey, baby.” You cooed at your Silencer as you patted it while starting it up. “We’ve got some catching up to do. Not us. I mean, catching up to the others. Unless you wanna catch up… how’ve you been?”

Clear of the hanger, you realised you were talking to your vehicle and couldn’t decide whether or not it was a good thing you were missing your psych appointment. Whatever. You were running on adrenaline now.

You didn’t manage to catch up to the others before they split up into groups to search the mission-specified locations on the planet but you recognised which Silencer belonged to whom. It looked like Vail and Lex were a team, Saima and Garric were partnered, and Ren had gone off on his own. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. What was the point of having guards if he wasn’t going to use them? You made your way to Kylo’s ship which had already landed.

Conditions were clear, unlike on the icy planet you’d once shared with Ren, and you managed to spot him as he disappeared into a cave not far from his Silencer. You landed your ship close to his and chased after him.

You only made it a few steps into the cave when you found yourself unable to go any further. A moment of panic washed over you as you were stuck in place by some invisible force but you quickly realised that was exactly what it was. You looked further into the cave and found him. The force user, hidden behind his mask, refusing to let you get any closer.

Tags: @marvelanimelover @sophiatomlinson23 @secretlygrantaire @m4shtyx @18crazybutcutealsopsycho @beautifulbows924 @whataloadofmalarkey @the-rain-pours-down @ghostslikemydoubts @pabegay1 @ymariejp @denisethestrange @bootstrapt3hmnk @mariska-emilbee @dank-lucille @frickfrackpattywhacktictac @yessy2012 @quierdoofthestars @voila-im-a-trashcan @kittenxnicole @mauvemountains @krylo-rxn @delanie-spam-blog

[stahvie]

Darling please take your time if you need to. I wish your stepmom the best! As much as I want the next chapter with my whole heart, we can wait more for you...

My inbox broke and didn’t alert me to this so I only found it when I was adding someone to the taglist for IKYW.

But thank you! My Stepmum is finally back at her home for the rest of her recovery so she’ll be comfier and less bored and I’ll be back to writing soon since I’ll have more free time again.

I just wanna thank everyone for being so patient. This all happened at some a rough time for my family because it’s been just shy of a year since my dad lost his battle, but we’re thankful that my stepmum’s fight is going so well. All the kind words have been such a help to me

[stahvie]

hahahahahaha oh no

i figured once i’ll keep you warm is done i was gonna start the kylo/hux/reader fic i started planning a while ago...

but now it might be matt the radar technician

i’m so sorry

[stahvie]

Yo! How you doing? I cant wait for your next chapter of I'll keep you warm... have you started writing it?

Sorry about the delay, my stepmum’s double mastectomy got scheduled for sooner than we’d anticipated which is great but also means my priorities aren’t exactly with my writing at the moment. Her surgery went well though and she’s recovering like a champ so hopefully life will get back to normal shortly.

[stahvie]

about the author! weird stuff only

Sounds fun... gonna be pretty vague because anonymity and whatnot and I dunno about “weird” though buuuuut...

- I’m a professional streamer (hence the anonymity... I don’t need my subs knowing I write about Star Wars dickin’)

- Became a streamer because too much anxiety to have a normal job and I don’t get anxiety when performing... streaming is kinda like performing

- Despite the sloppiness of my icon/banner here, I used to be a digital artist

- Mostly drawing porn... a whoooollllllle lotta porn

- The Grandmaster is just a dude version of my Nan (mostly in appearance... she’s not really a geriatric slut :\ )

- My dad looked like The Doctor... a specific one... but like I said, Imma be vague...

- My dads side of the family are all musicians/actors/something behind the scenes

- Because of that, I can 6 degrees of separation my way into the Star Wars, Marvel, and HP/FBAWTFT universes. Guys, I’m pretty much canon

- I met a lot of (mostly Australian) actors growing up but the only one that really matters was the guy who played B2 in Bananas in Pyjamas during the 90s

- My phobias are feet, birds, and bellybuttons

- Nerve damage fuh daysss... I’m practically Doctor Strange without the facial hair

- I haven’t seen my natural hair colour in years but I don’t think it’s as ginger as my body hair is trying to tell me it is...

- Wiccan

- I use runes and tarot to help guide my day

- I think horoscopes should be taken with a grain of salt buuuut I’m a Gemini/Cancer cusp and find that when I’m low I identify more as a Cancerian and when I feel like I’m in a good place in life I’m more Gemini

- Crows wherever I goes...

- The only birds I’m not scared of

- Okay, still a little frighten...

- I once wrote a play in highschool and HOLY HELL it was dumb but I was asked to flesh it out more so it could be turned into a proper production for broadway ...oversimplifying that a bit

- I’m not joking, it was r i d i c u l o u s... thus proving the “It’s not what you know. It’s who you know” thing

- I haven’t thought about that play in years... and apparently my sense of humour is just as lame as ever because somehow it’s still funny to me?

- Used to be able to make a clover out of my tongue until I got it pierced

- Also getting my tongue pierced was the only reason I stopped being a thumbsucker... there just wasn’t enough room in my mouth for it with all the swelling

- I was 18 hahaha

- I have to follow a pretty specific diet otherwise I get migraines and panic attacks

- Sometimes when it’s really cold I need to breathe through my mouth otherwise I get brainfreeze because my septum ring gets too cold...

- My family has a curse where first borns can’t be named James... first borns named James have a weird tendency to die at a young age in my family...

Thuh end?

[stahvie]

You do marvel requests too? If you do, can I get one with Stephen Strange in where the reader is a fellow surgeon and looks after him when he’s recovering from his accident and he scares her off by being rude. When he comes back he realizes he really misses her and just needs to apologize. Thanks love ❤️

Again, this took me so long to get around to and I’m sorry for that. Hope this is alright

Warnings: Uhhh.... mention of stuff in butts... This is smut free but I mean, this is a fic about doctors and sometimes patients have weird “accidents”... I think I’m making it worse...

“What are you doing?”

You looked up from Strange’s battered hands in the directionthe velvety voice came from. You’d been checking up on his hands hoping not towake him while you worked. As a surgeon he was known to be very particular, butas a patient, well, there was a reason why all of the nurses seemed to becometoo busy to tend to him.

Strange was an exceptional surgeon, and while you too were agreat surgeon, the way he worked, it seemed like he could weave magic with hishands. You couldn’t lie, you didn’t just admire his work, you may have also hadthe slightest little crush on him. He was no more than an acquaintance, butwhen did that ever stop a person from liking someone.

To call him competitive at his work wouldn’t be correct. Forhim to be competitive, he’d need to believe other surgeons could rival him, andhe simply didn’t think that to be the case. Despite his ego, he could be quitecharming, though that seemed to have met the same fate as his hands.

“Cleaning the scars… if that’s alright?” The tone of yourvoice wavered a little. You’d hoped to sound a little sarcastic to hide the factthat he intimidated you. You were both professionals in the same field, he knewhow the wounds needed to be cared for so you assumed the question had beenrhetorical but you’d answered it regardless.

“Well it hurts.” He snapped. You felt bad, but it wasnecessary to avoid infection.

“Good.” You replied sharply. His eyes flashed angrily at you,so you continued. “If it hurts, it means the nerve damage could have beenworse.”

“So, I suppose you think I should consider myself luckythen?”

“Lucky’s a stretch, but at least you weren’t killed.” Yousaid. You were trying to help him look on the bright side but he was tooattached to his grief to let it go.

Strange huffed and turned away from you to avoid moreconversation. Fine. You preferred it when he didn’t talk. Eventually he brokethe silence.

“For a nurse, your bedside manner could use some work.” Hesaid sardonically.

“I’m not a nurse.” You grumbled, refusing to look anywherebut his hands. You were just going to do your job and get out. “You scared awayall the nurses so you’re stuck with me.”

“Oh, joy…” He said dryly.

You finished up what you were doing, gathered everythingtogether, and left him to mope alone in his self-pity. He wasn’t going to getany sympathy from you. Had he been the man he was before his accident, sure,but he still deserved to be treated with kindness. But he wasn’t that man anymore.His accident had taken away any good qualities that had been in him.

Suddenly, you felt immense guilt. The man had just had hislivelihood taken away from him. His future had been stolen from him, of coursehe’d be upset. Strange needed someone to show him some empathy despitealienating everyone. He was hurt. More than just physically. You made a vow toyourself to show him kindness next time.

Next time hadn’t gone any better. You’d barely been able tokeep a straight face while tending to him. Once you were clear of the room youbraced yourself against the wall and let the tears that had stung your eyesfinally fall down your cheeks. Why was he like this? How could someone sink solow. Sure, he’d been through a lot but how could he be so heartless? Sympatheticfaces glanced your way as the nurses passed you in the hall, but none made youfeel any better.

All at once you felt amazingly stupid. How could you haveliked this man? Despite being sometimes obnoxiously confident, which on therare occasion had been endearing, he’d been charming and friendly enough to thepeople that respected him. He’d been that crush that you knew you reallyshouldn’t like but you had no control over. Your heart had betrayed you, but atleast you hadn’t let things develop too far.

Over the next few months you continued to take care of him aftereach surgery. No one else was willing to do the job and you were stubborn anddidn’t want his attitude to defeat you the way it had sent so many nursesrunning.

Once again you found yourself changing the dressings in silencewhile Strange refused to admit you were even in the room. The only acknowledgementyou’d ever get was when you touched somewhere particularly sensitive and he’dbark at you to be more careful.

“Why…” His voice broke the silence. It took you by surprisecausing you to jump and your hand to slip. He hissed in pain.

“I’m sorry! I’m so, so sorry!” You sputtered. It botheredyou a little how much you cared if you hurt him.

“You consider yourself a surgeon with those clumsy hands?”He yelled. “How many have you killed out of recklessness and incompetence?”

You whispered another apology and tried to continue to carefor his wounds hoping he was done berating you. He wasn’t.

“Oh, I bet you studied your little heart out to get here,didn’t you? Countless sleepless nights and study groups, fuelling yourself withwhatever caffeine hit you could get your hands on, and for what? Undeniablemediocrity! Was this your childhood dream? To grow up and really make adifference in the world? And what are you doing now? Removing toys from the stomachsof idiot children and dislodging items from perverts that they accidentally ‘fell on’. Yeah, you’re living the dream.”

“And don’t think I don’t know who you are. I’ve seen you.Skulking around. Taking the patients no one else wants. Why though? Because you’retoo incompetent to take a patient worth saving or is it just because you’ve gota heart of gold and believe, if you really try your hardest, anything ispossible? Is that how you got stuck with me? No, I bet you begged. You wantedto be the one to treat me because I’m remarkable! Hoping I’d mentor you nowthat my career is over? The closest you’ll ever come to greatness is touchingthese broken hands!”

Your lip betrayed you as it began to wobble. You didn’t wantto let yourself be so affected by his words but he’d pulled out some truths andused them as ammunition against you. Yes, you absolutely wanted to save lives,you definitely took cases that others wouldn’t because you really believedeveryone deserves a chance at life, no matter the risk. You’d never consideredit a bad thing but Strange was openly mocking you as though you were no morethan a child making naïve decisions based on hope.

As tears threatened to fall from your eyes, you quicklyexcused yourself from the room. You refused to let him see you cry. You stoppedat the doorway and paused for a moment. You wouldn’t let him drag you down tohis level.

“Strange… I hope you have a good recovery… and I hope youfind happiness wherever your life takes you next.” You called back to him,leaving before he could say another harsh word to you.

You were done. Strange was becoming a vile man that lackedany kind of empathy. It was hard to watch him fall so far, but you just couldn’tkeep watching.

                                                                                               *

You were fresh out of surgery and more than ready to call itquits for the night. The odds had been stacked against you, but true to yourself,you’d picked a patient that was considered too risky, and what’s more, she madeit through the operation. It was hard to celebrate the victory, things hadtaken a turn for the worse which meant the surgery had taken hours longer thananticipated. You were exhausted but proud. Until you saw him.

You’d changed out of your scrubs and was just about to makeyour way to the carpark when you spotted him turn the corner at the far end ofthe hallway. Despite the time that had passed, you still panicked and duckedinto the closest door. It was a small storage closet and you were just relievedyou hadn’t accidentally burst into an unsuspecting patients room. Ugh, what washe doing here? And what was he wearing?!

A few seconds passed, enough to make you think he hadn’tseen you, but you had no idea how long you’d have to wait in there. What if hehadn’t gone past yet? What if he was still in the hallway talking to someone?You’d need to come up with a good excuse to use if someone questioned why youwere in the tiny room. You looked around and reached for the first thing yousaw.

The door opened unexpectedly, catching you completely off guard.

“Hnnn…glove!” You blurted out and held up the single gloveto show Strange. Well, that was embarrassing. You rolled your eyes and shookyour head at your own actions and tried to push past him to escape thesituation. You didn’t want to give him the chance to sour your mood after yourvictory on the operating table.

“[L/N], wait.” Strange reached an arm out to try to get youto stop but you weren’t going to let him manipulate you just so he could berateyou like he had done so many months ago. “[L/N], I need to talk to you.”

You gave him the filthiest look you could muster and dartedbeneath his outstretched arm. You barged your way out of the door and made abeeline for the carpark.

“[Y/N], please.” He called from the door. The sincerity inhis voice only made you angrier at him. He called after you again. People werestarting to look at you and as much as you didn’t want to cause a scene, youreally didn’t want to spend another second with that man. After you’d turnedthe corner you could no longer hear him calling for you. It couldn’t have beenthat important if he’d given up so quickly.

Exiting the building you wrapped your scarf around your neckto stop the cold air from assaulting your warm skin. After you dug out yourkeys, you looked up and saw him waiting by your car. How did he do that? You’dtaken the most direct route out of the hospital. You must have been more tiredthan you’d realised. Maybe you shouldn’t be driving.

“What do you want, Strange?” You finally caved, he veryclearly wasn’t going to leave you alone until you’d heard him out. Then again,you could just drive off, it’s not like he knew where you lived and could magichis way there like he’d seemingly done to beat you to your car.

“[Y/N], I’m sorry. I was unnecessarily cruel to you.” Hespoke solemnly and you decided to hear him out, giving a slight nod for him tocontinue. “I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I need to apologise for theway I treated you.”

You didn’t know what to say. Unsure if he was being genuineor if this was some kind of ruse to further humiliate you, you decided toremain silent. Forgiveness was not going to come easy.

“I should never have said those things to you. I can’tremember what I said exactly anymore, but I know you didn’t deserve any of it. Notjust the things I said on the day you walked out, which I can’t fault you for,but also for everything I said to you throughout my recovery.” Strange said.

Your mind replayed the things he’d said to you over thosemonths, highlighting some of the more hurtful things he’d called you.

“Pathetic, miserable, naïve, a sorry excuse for a doctor…”You listed off.

“I’m so sorry, [Y/N]”

“As useless as your hands…” You recounted.

“Completely uncalled for.” Strange said grimly.

“Forgettable.”

“Not a shred of truth to that.” The look in his eyes madeyou believe he was being honest and you despised that.

You were prepared to hate him for the rest of your life buthe did seem sincere. No, this had to be a trick. He wanted something.

“What do you want, Strange? Do you need a ride somewhere or…?”You rolled your eyes at him and left the question open ended so he could replywith whatever he was obviously buttering you up for.

“No, I don’t need a ride somewhere.” He chuckled inwardly atsome inside joke you were obviously out of the loop of. “Honestly, [Y/N], Iregret every horrible thing I’ve ever said to you. You don’t need to forgive me,if you think I’m past forgiveness then I can accept that, but it would mean theworld to me if you did.”

“Why are you doing this?” Your voice shook. You wanted toappear unaffected, but old wounds were being reopened. You were angry… dejected…vulnerable.

“I became something terrible after the accident. I scared alot of good people away. Some of them friends. You though… I thought for sureafter that first day that you’d disappear like the others had, but you cameback. You kept coming back. [Y/N], you showed me a kindness when no one elsewould.”

Stephen reached out for your hands, they were growing colderthe longer they were exposed to the night air and placed them in his. It surprisedyou that he’d willingly let you touch his hands now, they were so scarred andhe’d resented every moment you’d touched them during his recovery.

“What’s changed?” You asked, you stared up into his stupid,sparkly eyes hoping to find the truth in them. They reminded you of themisguided crush you’d once had, and you resented that a few kind words from himmade you feel like you still had remnants of it. “Why should I believe you now?”

“You’re a smart woman, [Y/N], you don’t need to believe aword of what I’m saying if you don’t feel like you can, but I hate what I putyou through.” He paused and his fingers shifted so they interlaced with yours. “Afterwestern medicine failed me, I sought out an alternative. It helped me come topeace with my accident.”

You traced your thumb across one of the many scars on hishands, not knowing what to say to him.

“I’ll never be a surgeon again, but I’ve found a way to helppeople. I can help more people now than I could have with healthy hands and Ihave you to thank for that.” His voice was soft and reassuring. “You inspiredme. I don’t pick and choose who to save based my reputation. Everyone deservesa chance.”

How were you supposed to react to that? Strange barelyentered your mind anymore these days and when he did you were used to resentinghim. Now out of nowhere he shows up and has completely changed? On top of that,the butterflies that used to live in your stomach seemed to be moving back inagain. That was the last thing you needed when trying to decide if you shouldforgive him.

“I need time…” You whispered. You were willing to give him anotherchance but it wasn’t going to come easily.

“Time?” The corners of Strange’s mouth curled upward gently.“I can give you time.”

The way he said it made it seem like another joke you didn’tunderstand. Sometimes you thought he seemed as peculiar as his name implied, andfinally deciding to give him a chance, you would soon find out just how bizarrehe’d become.

[stahvie]

Hiii! I just want to pop by and say that I hope you feel better soon!! Ps...I love your writing so much and I hope you are having a great day/night/morning!

Thank you! I’m pretty sure I’m only a few days away from being better. My partner only had a cough so imagine my confusion when I become all leaky and fevery. My partner also got the flushot though and I didn’t so it’s my fault I’m in this situation... heh.