sunnsolar

[sunnsolar]

Hello bisexual community

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Lovely things I get to experience thanks to OSDD is enterin' my BF's DMS only to be jumpscared by medical photography

(They were talkin' about surgical cases from an anthropological angle or some shit idfk)

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As someone with BPD, I'd just like to try to clear some things up.

People with BPD do/are:

DO have trouble regulating their emotions and their impulses

DO struggle with healthy relationships and attachments to others

DO have an intense fear of abandonment and will do whatever it takes to avoid being abandoned

DO have an unstable sense of self and their identity

DO suffer from chronic self-harming and/or suicidal behaviours

DO experience feelings of emptiness or hollowness

DO have erratic moods and emotions that can change drastically from moment to moment

DO frequently engage in impulsive behaviours

ARE able to feel real love towards other people

ARE able to be treated

ARE able to live happy, well-rounded lives

ARE able to form healthy relationships

DO deserve respect

DO deserve support

DO deserve love

People with BPD do/are not:

DO NOT act the way they do for attention (the self-destructive behaviours people with BPD sometimes engage in stems from a need to cope with our emotions and thoughts, not out of attention-seeking)

ARE NOT intentionally or maliciously manipulative (manipulative behaviour is pre-planned and intentional. People with BPD engage in their behaviours as a reaction to their intense emotions. While we may act in ways that attempt to control how others behave, we are typically doing so to try to ease or prevent our own emotional pain, not to hurt others.)

ARE NOT dangerous or violent (people with BPD are much more likely to hurt themselves than others)

HAVE NOT all experienced childhood trauma (many people with BPD have experienced childhood trauma, but many have not. Childhood trauma is a risk factor, not a cause.)

ARE NOT all AFAB (while a larger percentage of those diagnosed with BPD are assigned female at birth, many of those who are assigned male at birth also suffer from BPD, and some evidence shows that it may be more equally distributed among both sexes)

ARE NOT untreatable (there are lots of treatment options available! DBT is the most common, but there are many other options as well.)

ARE NOT all abusers (abuse is not linked to any one mental illness. People with BPD may struggle to form healthy relationships and this can lead to abusive dynamics, however ANYONE can be abusive regardless of their mental health.)

ARE NOT all the same (BPD is a spectrum and it affects all of us a little bit differently. Not everyone is going to experience it exactly the same as someone else, and it's important to recognize that we're all individuals.)

ARE NOT rare (BPD is actually pretty common. It's estimated that around 1-2% of the population are diagnosed BPD. That's around 156,000,000 people, and that's not even counting those who are undiagnosed.)

ARE NOT horrible, unfeeling monsters (we are literally just people)

ARE NOT unworthy of love (EVERYONE is worthy and deserving of love)

[sunnsolar]

if you're writing and find yourself thinking 'this is too weird/gross/offputting/esoteric/ambitious/catered to my specific interests + sure to push away a broader audience' that is the devil speaking and it is a lie. you are already firmly on the right path and you need to double down

[sunnsolar]

As someone who's also a survivor of child sexual abuse another thing to keep in mind (Hold onto your seats cause this take is so hot) is that we also don't promote a society where pedophiles can get rehabilitation/therapy/support to manage themselves by sayin' how much we hate them and how they deserve to die.

Humans are social creatures. The more we ostracise a certain group of people the more likely they are to find people who ACCEPT them which is why we got baffling shit like the MAP community, etc etc

I get a lot of people feel hella disgusted knowin' some folks out there are attracted to kids. That's a normal feelin' to have. Have you also considered that some pedophiles are victims of CSA themselves? That the very trauma that disturbed them made them the same way?

I don't wish death or punishment to my abuser. I more so get sad that they were raised in a way to ever think that was okay. I wish for them to be properly educated, given a therapist, and to learn how their actions can impact young growin' minds to actually take preventative measures.

I know of a person a few connections away who IS a pedophile. And guess what? He feels disgusted by it, never EVER wants to hurt kids and so he went to therapy for years upon years. Now he has a wife, his own kids, and knows how to properly excuse himself from situations so that he'll never find himself in a position where he could harm any youth. That does entail he has to keep more distance from kids in general but the self-awareness he has helps him make sure people are safe.

And that? That's the future I want for people. Not for everyone to go to jail. And I don't think that connection I mentioned earlier should have to live a miserable life of self-loathing 'cause of the circumstances.

If you promote a safe enough space for someone to uncomfortably admit they might fall under a form of paedophilia, what are you gonna do? Tell them to die? Or tell them you'll support them in gettin' the help they need in order to manage those scary feelings? Ask yourself, are you even promotin' a safe enough space for someone to admit that so they CAN get help?

Also, it's okay if handlin' somethin' like that is too much. I'm not suggesting CSA survivors need to do this heavy liftin', I wish for them to safely heal away from their abusers. This is for the more generalized public.

People ain't bad for feeling things. It's what people act on that is harmful.

Speaking as a survivor of child sex abuse: the world would be a lot better if yall spent less time talking about the ways in which pedophiles should be punished and more time supporting survivors and preventing abuse

I get it, punishment can feel cathartic. I’ve certainly spent time imagining all the ways in which my own abuser might be punished. But ultimately, him dying, or being jailed, or publicly shamed, isn’t actually going to help me nor will it stop more kids from getting hurt in the future.

I don’t want more prisoners. I want free therapy with trauma informed counselors. I want better sex education for young children that teaches them about consent and body autonomy. And I want a society in which I can openly discuss my trauma, or at least as openly as yall discuss the evils of pedophiles

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3 components of worldbuilding:

1. The author’s kinks

2. The author’s power fantasy

3. The author’s political agenda

Plot and logic optional

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Pet the Tenebie, cherish the Tenebie

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i finished another tales game u know what that means: skit portrait redraws!!!

static version below:

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Zelos Wilder is the gayest straight man ever

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the secret to organising any kind of trip with your friends is to become the benevolent dictator. do NOT wait for everyone to provide a consensus on things before you book anything. do it and then ask for feedback after. do not ask people what they would like to do just tell them what is happening and let them all nod along like the sheep they are. this is the ONLY way to coordinate a group of adults in their 20s/30s

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bro. we need to fuck, bro. for the narrative, dude. for the progression of the hero’s journey, homeslice. we need to bone nasty. no homo or anything it’s just for the character development. yeah we need to cuddle afterwards. for the narrative, man.

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I don't need to breathe when you look at me, all I see is green 💚⚡

A well thought out and meticulously organized fraxus playlist, if you even care

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at the insane stage of character obsession where i start getting the urge to post pngs of them every five seconds like im showing ppl a picture of my stupid ass boyfriend that nobody likes but me

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elf yuri except one of them is high fantasy and the other is one of santa's