✶ DRUNK IN LOVE
𝓘.──── . . . 𝒷𝖺𝖻𝗒, 𝗂 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎
💭 엔하HYUNGLiNEXFEM!OC ꗃSCENARiO. hyung line being needy after their first time with mila. ( 2022 ) 𓈃 REQUESTED. 𝅄CONTAiNS. smut, swearing, jealousy & possessiveness, pet names, unedited !MDNi!
꒰ NOTES ✦ Just letting you guys know that smut isn’t my forte so umm yeah. No further comment.
SMUT WARNiNGS ⋆ implied unprotected sex (zon’t zo it), mentioned loss of virginity, implied oral (m & f receiving), tit sucking, cockwarming, corruption kink, slight somnophilia, masturbation . . .
GO BACK HOME ?!
IF THERE IS ONE THING MILA IS NOT, it’s innocent. No matter how many people she may fool with her doe eyes and pouty lips, those coy smiles and that sweet face, she is not nearly as pure as they think. She’s equal parts devil and angel—and every part of their fantasies.
When Mila first initiates intimacy with her boyfriends, she’s a virgin in every sense of the word: unkissed, untouched, and wholly inexperienced in everything that lovers do when they’re alone.
Jay is proud to say that he was the same way. It wasn’t something to be embarrassed about, but rather something he took pride in—that every one of her firsts was also one of his, that they were experiencing things together, with neither one ahead or behind. And yes, even though he is a gentlemen, he is still a man.
It’s why he can’t help the way his eyes travel down her body when she’s not looking, as if he’s in a trance. She’s not doing anything in particular, but he still can’t take her eyes away from her.
Mila is wearing a white dress, he notes, like the one she wore when they first had sex together. No, it is the same one. There’s no way he can mistake it. It’s a cute thing, really, the way it cinches at the waist and flares around the plush skin of her thighs; the way the material of the top clings to her bosom, moulding against her mounds perfectly and revealing just the slightest bit of cleavage.
At least, it should be cute. But all he can think about in that moment is how they first ended up in bed together, and the things that led to it.
He remembers the way he had just left the shower, water dripping down his torso and to the towel wrapped loosely around his waist, when the doorbell of his hotel room rang. He had opened it to see her standing there, her soft, cherry-pink lips parted softly at the sight of his half-naked state.
It was hardly the first time she had seen him without a shirt, but this time, it was different. She had always been shy with showing appreciation for his figure, and had the cutest habit of looking away shyly buying her lip. But that time he noticed the way her eyes drifted down his body, pupils dilated i with desire as she drank every feature of him in with her pretty eyes.
It filled him with pride to see Mila that way, knowing he was the cause of it. But, fuck, he was no better when he found himself growing hard when the little (devious) angel of his had pressed her soft curves against his still wet body, transferring the droplets of water onto that adorable little dress of hers that clung to her body, more transparent than white, and leaving little to the imagination.
“You’re getting wet,” he had said to her, gulping down his growing desire to kiss her senseless as she looked up with those doe eyes of her. He fully intended on being the rational one of the two of them, and to make sure they both attended that reservation he booked at the fancy new restaurant down the road.
But all of that flew out the window when she oh so innocently said, “I don’t mind you getting me wet,” her fingers trailing down his abs.
Fuck, why did he have to remember that now? Hems supposed to be paying attention to her as she talks to him about something that happened earlier today, when she was out with friends. But god, if he wasn’t going crazy as he remembered their night together.
He vividly remembers everything about it. The way he had fallen for her allure and carried her to his room, still dressed only in the hotel towel, before laying her on the bed, watching her hair sprawl around her head like a halo. He remembers the way his hands travelled up her skirt and to the skin of her waist, bunching her dress up to reveal a lack of safety shorts, and a pair of white lace panties. It felt almost sinful to slide her panties down her thighs, marvelling at how soaked they became without even touching her.
“Fuck, angel, you were going to go out like this?” He asked. “All it would take is one gust of wind and they would know that you were dipping. Is that what you want Engenes to know?”
“They wouldn’t,” Mila whined.
“They would,” Jay pressed firmly, sinking to his knees at the edge of the bed. “They would see just how wet you are for me.”
It wasn’t the first time he found himself kneeling before her, but every time he saw the glistening folds of her pussy as he peeled the sticky layer of her panties away from it, he was in awe. And one lick up the strip of her folds would have him groaning, eyes rolling to the back of his head at the taste of her on his tongue.
Great. Now he’s getting a hard-on.
“Oppa, are you paying attention?” Mila turns to face Jay at that very moment, but he is even quicker, pulling her down to his lap as she squeals in surprise. “Oppa?! What’s—?”
Mila’s eyes widen as her ass is planted on his lap, where she can feel the prominent bulge in his pants. Her breathe hitches in he throat, while Jay’s lips plant themselves on her neck. A hand travels to her thigh, and his thumb rubs soothing circles on her creamy soft skin. “Sorry, angel,” he whispers huskily, “but I don’t think I can concentrate right now.”
“Oh,” is all Mila can manage to say. She can feel her thighs clench together as he kisses the column of her neck. She squirms in his lap, grinding against his hard length, earning a deep groan from her lover. The sound that goes straight to her pussy, and immediately the tell tale signs of arousal making make itself known.
“I promise I’ll listen to your story,” Jay says. “But do you think you can do me a favour first?”
Mila is putty in his hands as his rough palm glides up the skirt of her dress in a familiar manner. “Anything,” she whimpers pathetically.
Jay chuckles. “Good girl,” he purrs. Mila whines as his hands find their way to her hips, and he grinds her ass back on his length, causing her to moan for the friction against her pulsating pussy. “I just need you to keep moving your cute ass like this, okay? And you can tell me all about your day while you’re at it.”
If she can talk, that is. Jay has a feeling neither of them will be able to.
SUNGHOON WAKES UP TO AN EMPTY BED, and immediately is on alert. He jolts up, the sheets falling to his still naked lap, and his eyes dart around to find no trace of his girlfriend anywhere. He slept like a baby after last night, and had been expected her to do the same when he woke up, considering they spent most of it doing anything other than sleeping.
Fuck. The images come flooding back like a memory from a night of drinking—only much more pleasurable, and a thousand times more intense. He still remembers them the way Mila was writhing under him, moaning and whimpering his name as he thrusted into her, their hands entwined up her head.
He can picture the way her skin glistened under the light with sweat, her features contorted into pleasure as she changed his name over and over again like a prayer. Pleading, begging for him to give her release she was chasing as her hips rolled up to meet his, driving his cock deeper into her walls, and egging him on to go faster than before.
His first time with her is simultaneously everything he imagined, and yet better. His dirtiest fantasies would never do justice to the pure pleasure and bliss of reaching his high while inside her, and feeling the way she clenched around him as she reached her own. He had already been helpless for her, but going all the way has been the final nail in the coffin, securing his unending fixation with everything that is her. As if she’s the sun his whole world revolves around.
The only thing that could have made it better is if they woke up the same way. Sunghoon grumbles as he scrambles for his pants, which lay forgotten in the corner of the room, lazily running a hand through his hair after buttoning it up.
He spots a pair of panties and a bra on the way out and smiles to himself as he remembers how they ended up there. It was a petty argument that led to it all, surprisingly enough. He can barely remember it after last night, which proves how petty it was (or just how whipped he is), and was a misunderstanding that could easily be resolved if they just stoned being stubborn.
But everyone has their flaws.
Mila had been upset to find that Sunghoon had been approached by someone who didn’t know he was an idol, and certainly didn’t know he was taken. They aren’t in South Korea, seeing as they’re in the middle of a tour, so it’s an easy mistake to make. Except, Sunghoon—with his minimal English—didn’t recognise that the woman was “flirting” with him, and that by outsider’s point of view, he seemed to be receptive.
Mila promptly shut down the woman’s attempts and then walked off without sparing Sunghoon a glance. A petty move, honestly, but expected from her. Sunghoon chased her down until he cornered her in their hotel room, where he had kissed her senseless after realising the reason for her attitude.
“I don’t like the way she was look at you,” she mumbled. And Sunghoon felt a surge of possessive pride in knowing she had gotten so territorial over her. Except, he didn’t appreciate the cold shoulder.
“How cute,” he growled, as he harshly attached his mouth to her neck with hot open-mouthed kisses, fangs scraping harshly against her skin. His long fingers weaved their way into her hair, tugging on the roots to expose her flesh to him like an animal snapping his prey’s neck with his teeth. “I should spank you for being such a brat.”
He didn’t know where the words came from. Actually, that’s a lie—they most likely came from the porn he watched to prepare him for when he eventually had his first time with Mila. And it worked like a charm, because Mila was whining and whimpering in his hold, her knees weak and her cunt absolutely dripping with arousal.
“I’m sorry, Oppa,” she mewled pathetically.
“Sorry won’t cut it,” he growled. “Get on your knees. You’re going to suck me off until I forgive you.”
And Mila had been such a good girl, doing exactly as he said, taking his cock as he pushed her head down onto his length until he came in her mouth. But that hadn’t been enough, and he had her grinding against his thigh until she was begging for something more. For all of him, for everything he had to give her.
“Are you sure?” Sunghoon had asked, finally giving into his gentle instincts.
“Please,” she begged—and oh was she adorable when she did so, cuddling to his chest. “Please, Oppa, I need you inside me.”
He almost wished he had a tape so he could rewatch the scenes all over again.
Sunghoon sighs as he opens the door to reveal the smell of food wafting in the air, followed by the sight of Mila on the kitchen, humming as she cooked an egg on the frying pan—wearing his shirt and, apparently, nothing underneath.
The light of the morning rays are forgiving. They grant him the perfect view of her curves hiding beneath the material of his white tee, and he wonders if he will be able to see the canvas of marks he left her skin the night before. If his fingerprints and love bites are even more visible now than when he was dragging his lips and hands against every inch of her body last night.
He bites his lips as he approaches her from behind, stealthy and silent, like a predator in the wild, hunting down its prey. She doesn’t notice him until he’s wrapping his arms around her, caging her agains the kitchen bench top as she removes the frying pan from the heated stove.
“Oppa!” She spins around to face him with that look of pure adoration in her eyes that never fails to make him melt on the inside. “You’re up! Are you hungry?”
Sunghoon hums, resting his cheek against hers. Truth be told, he’s starving—but he doesn’t want to let go of her so soon, wanting to feel her as close to him as possible. Now that he knows what it feels like to be inches inside her, he wants to be nothing but their skin against each other and to hold her soft body against his firm one.
“You left bed,” he says, with a small hint of a pout on his lips. He would die before the others see him this clingy, but Mila finds it adorable and plants a soft peck on his cheek.
“Sorry, Oppa,” she says, “but someone had to make food, and you were out like a light.” She then giggles to herself, earning a raised eyebrow from Sunghoon. “I guess I tired you out.”
Oh, really? So that’s how she wants to frame it? Sunghoon chuckles deeply. He turns Mila around so that they’re facing each other, before completely cornering her against the bench top, his hands on both her hips and his head leaning down against hers.
“That’s funny,” he starts.
His eyes look down the front of Mila’s (or rather, his) shirt, to see her hardened nipples straining against the fabric—and, fuck, he can’t be distracted now. Not even when he knows that underneath that shirt of hers (his), her plump mounds are begging to be held in his palms. But she doesn’t seem to be fairing any better, her eyes travelling down his bare torso, and his tongue flicking against her lips.
She’s just as affected as he is. And he loves it.
“If I remember correctly,” Sunghoon teases, “you were the one who kept begging me that you couldn’t take it anymore, isn’t that right, princess?”
Mila has a pretty flush on her face, and it reminds him of the absolutely fucked look on her face as he fucked her last night. She pouts up at him, tempting him with her plump lips. He can’t help it. Everything about her is irresistible to him; everything about her has him obsessed.
“You’re mean,” she whines. And, oh, if the sound doesn’t make his cock twitch him his pants.
Sunghoon simply catches her lips between his, suckling on her pout. She whimpers against his mouth—such a sweet, sweet sound—and he nibbles on the flesh, before his tongue flicks out to lick it clean. “Don’t start what you can’t finish.”
At this Mila giggles again. “You mean like you finished last night?”
Sunghoon groans. But, yeah, he walked into that one. He digs his fingers into her side, causing her to squirm as he tickles her gently. “Now who’s the one being mean?”
“Stooooop—eep!” Mila jumps as he slaps her ass, her tits bouncing before they are pressed for only against him when she clutches him. “Oppa!”
Sunghoon doesn’t say anything this time, instead placing another kiss on her lips. She melts into him, chasing his mouth with her own, fingers locked in his hair. His hands pat her waist softly, before travelling to the hem of the shirt she’s wearing, pulling it up softly. It gives her more than enough time to pull away, but she doesn’t.
His hands travel up the material to grip her thighs before lifting her up in one smooth hoist, balancing her thighs around his hips.
“Fuck breakfast,” Sunghoon growls. And Mila seems to agree.
JAKE CAN’T HELP BUT FEEL GUILTY. He’s acting like a teenaged boy whenever he’s around his girlfriend, and every little thing she does turns him on to the point that he has to jerk off himself quietly under the sheets of his bed. Not even porn can make him lose it so quickly—not after he’s gotten a taste of what it’s like for him to be the one instead.
It’s only worse because Mila wants nothing more than to innocently cuddle on her bed and watch movies, and yet he’s sporting an embarrassingly uncomfortable hard-on under their blanket.
He can’t help it. She’s wearing a pair of short satin shorts and a matching camisole that does nothing to take his attention away from her tits (she’s definitely not wearing a bra), and the curve of her ass. It’s only worse when she’s pressed right against his side, leg hooked over his stomach as she clings to him.
The last time they were alone like this in a dark room, he ended up losing it while she was she riding him, the move nothing but a backdrop to their passionate love-making that ended up on the the of them being complete messes of bodily fluids.
He had always imagined that his first time with Mila would he romantic, with gentle touches and soft loving. It wasn’t like that at all. But if you asked Jake, if was far better. It was messy, it was desperate, it was a jumble of rushed undressing and the pure need.
It was Jake not being able to make a coherent sentence as Mila straddled his lap, before sinking down onto his cock, her warmth eveloping his length with a vice grip. It was him gripping her hips until they bruised, head thrown back as she bounced on his lap with unforgiving rhythm. It was Jake losing all senses as she clenched around him upon her impending orgasm, writing him dry until he couldn’t even keep his eyes open for more than five minutes after they were done.
“Jakey, are you okay?” Mila asks sweetly, eyes gazing at him wide and unblinking. And while Jake appreciates the sentiment, all he can think about is the way her eyes look the exact same as whenever she’s kneeling in front today him, taking his cock in her mouth as she bobs her head down his length.
Shit. His pants are uncomfortably tight now, and it’s all because he can’t get a fucking grip. He never used t be this easily hot and bothered before—why did it have to start now!
“I-I’m good,” he assures��albeit weakly.
Mila doesn’t look convinced and shifts (Fuck, he wants to scream, please don’t move!), her breast pressing further against Jay, and her thigh brushing dangerously close to his prominent bulge. She pouts, and places a hand on Jake’s forehead. “Are you sick? You don’t look too good.”
At this rate, she’s definitely going to know he’s sporting a boner—and damn it, if that isn’t embarrassing after the way their first night went together.
“Awww, you’re so cute,” Mila had cooed as Jake became a whining mess under her. “So sensitive. Don’t worry, baby, I’ll take care of you.”
As if he hasn’t been the one who wanted to take care of her instead. But seeing as she had already slept with Jay and Sunghoon, Mila has an advantage over him, and was able to keep her calm a bit more easily. She didn’t even get to cun until after he did, and he still hadn’t gotten over it.
But at the time he was too lost in everything that was her. It was too much. She was too much. He didn’t even realise how they had gotten to that point. All he knew was that she looked absolutely divine wearing his shirt and no bra (just like now), and he had gotten lost in feeling her up, his lips attached to hers as if she were all the oxygen he needed to breathe.
His hands had peeled the shirt off from her, before lips found themselves down the valley of her breast, his finger rolling an erected nipple in one hand while his mouth latched to the other. His tongue swirled around the bud, and Mila had arched off the mattress, hands digging into his hair as he played with her breast, and suckled like a baby.
“God, Jakey, your mouth feels so good~” she had whined. And of course, he had to use it properly, or he wouldn’t forgive himself. He had kissed his way down to the hand of her pants, and then her panties. He tore them from her and left her bare, legs open and thighs on either side of his his head.
It was a routine he grew all too familiar with. He had fucked his tongue into her right hole—in and out again—while she clenched around him, her thighs threatening to crush his head as he ate her cunt like a starved man, right until she was cumming all over his tongue.
“Good boy,” she said. For some reason, that had been enough to make him lose all sense of himself. And before he knew it, she was taking his length in her hand as he moaned, begging and begging for her to take him inside her—to let him feel her warm cunt around his cock.
And now really didn’t the time to remember that.
“I’m fine, baby—aahh~” Jake can’t help the sound thay escapes when Mila is sitting up, her thigh rubbing against his hard-on in the process. “Fuck, baby, what was that for?”
“Sorry,” Mila squeaks. “I didn’t… I didn’t know…”
She looks so cute embarrassed, Jake thinks, as if she’s in the definition of a siren in bed—or at least, when they were in bed. Now she looks just like a startled little animal. Absolutely adorable.
“Jakey, do you want help?” Mila asks shyly, her hand reaching down to his pants. “I can—”
Jake grabs her wrist before she can go ahead, causing her to pause. “No, no—let me do you first.”
Before Mila can protest, Jake flips them over so she’s beneath her, eyes looking up at him with a mixture of surprise and arousal. He’s lost all sense of control now that he’s been caught, and he would be more ashamed if it weren’t for the fact that Mila is whispering his name with a desperate note.
“Please baby,” he begs, his lips leaning down to capture his. He groans against her lips as he sinks between her parted legs, her hips slotting against his perfectly. He grinds against her, practically jackrabbiting against her covered cunt. She moans helplessly against his assault, meeting his enthusiasm work her own. His senses now overridden by her and the feeling of her against him. “Fuck! Please, I need to see you cum for me before you do anything else.”
He’s not just desperate. He’s just desperate for her pleasure as he is for his own.
HEESEUNG STIRS IN THE DARK. It’s still too earthly to be up, if the lack of light filtering through the curtains is an indication, but he can’t help it. He feels his girlfriend before he sees her—feels the way she’s clenching around his length in her sleep, whimpering and moaning like she had been a few hours ago, before they feel asleep with her warming his cock for him.
It might not have been a good idea to do so, Heeseung admits. But he’d be a liar if he didn’t say he was too obsessed with the feel of Mila around his cock, enough that he couldn’t even bare to pull out of her when they were finished last night. It was a long night, which he made sure to draw out, and even now he feels it’s not enough.
Mila had been so innocent when they started dating. His little angel hadn’t even kissed a man before, let alone wrapped around a man’s cock like she was now. He, on the other hand, was a little less pure—he had at least done more than her, at any rate.
His previous girlfriend had been an older one, and taught him the ways to pleasure a woman—something he was no grateful for, since it meant he could do the same for his baby, make her feel good until she was so fucked out in bliss she couldn’t speak. And he savoured taking her there step by step.
He got her used to his fingers, then his tongue, and now he was dead set on making her addicted to the feeling of his cock. Last night had only been the first step.
She had been so adorable, pouting as he refused to pay attention to her—playing hard to get as he focused on his game instead of her precious face. It wasn’t easy to do, but it was well worth it when she found herself boldly straddling his lap, acting like a little kitten trying to win affection. Her soft lips kissed their way up his Adam’s apple, teeth grazing it slightly—just the way he liked it.
He couldn’t resist giving into her, lips teasing hers and hands on her hips as he moved them back and forth against his clothed length. But then she was audacious and wanted more, pawing at his clothes in clumsy attempt to take them off which had him chuckling fondly to himself.
He remembers the way she had whined as he positioned himself at her entrance, teasing her slightly, before pushing all the way in, his impressive length reaching a depth his fingers never could. He watched as she became a mess beneath him, crying out his name in ecstasy as his hips rolled in steady motion, hitting that spot that had her seeing stars.
“How’s that?” He whispered.
“Feels so good~” she moaned. “So full…”
“Yeah? You can feel me right in here, can’t you?” He pressed down once abdomen, feeling the way he filled her up inside.
As the oldest and most experienced member, it was only right that he was last—or he will ruin any other man for her. She already seemed ruined enough though when she accepted his request to stay inside her.
“Let’s stay like this, okay?” He asked. “You feel too good to pull out.”
“Mkay,” she said obediently.
“Such a good girl for me,” he cooed. “Keeping me warm.”
And she had babbles incoherently before falling asleep on his cock, and he had rolled over so she lay on top of him, breasts pressed against his chest, and their breaths exhaling and inhaling in unison. He had been having such a peaceful sleep, too, until she started to shift on her length, causing him to harden inside her with all her movement.
He was so lost in her that he even dreamt of them together like this, and caught himself moving his hips on his sleep. And, fuck, if that weren’t enough to make him fun on the spot, Mila had been feeling it all even as she slept. And now, he has to wake her up. It’s depraved, he knows, but now he has finally felt her around him, and it’s going to drive him insane if he doesn’t get his fill again.
He needs to fuck her, and see her expression twist with pleasure like it did before. Romantic, no. But he’s absolutely whipped, seeing her ruined beyond repair for his cock.
“Baby,” he groans into her ear, rubbing her back. “Baby, wake up.”
Mila stirs. “Oppa?”
Heeseung hums. “Shhh, I got you,” he says as he flips them over, so that he’s on top. “I’m sorry but I need to borrow your pretty little pussy for a bit, okay?”
Mila groans as she rubs her eyes. “Now?” She clenches around him, and Heeseung groans.
“Yeah, now. Is that okay, my love?” Heeseung pressed, wanting nothing more than to hear her permission. “I just need to fuck your pretty cunt again and you can go back to sleep, okay? It will be just like before.”
Mila moans, her walls pulsating around him. “Can you stay inside again?”
Fuck. Heeseung’s cock twitches inside Mila, and he thanks heaven that he’s been given such a perfect girlfriend.
“Of course. Anything for my sweet girl,” Heeseung coos, peppering her face with kisses as he slips out of her, before getting ready to thrust into her again. “I’ll make you feel good I promise. And we can cuddle again like before.”
He’d do it again and again and never stop if he could.
© ENMI-LAND, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. DO NOT COPY, TRANSLATE, REPOST.
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𝓐fter the Aftermath
heeseung x medical school fem!reader
—you and heeseung are best friends and highschool sweethearts that broke up before you entered medical school. now one of your friends from your highschool friend group is getting married—and they want the whole gang back before the wedding.
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
genre : angst with fluff ending ( slightly suggestive ending again lol )
pairings : heeseung x fem!reader
wc : 4.4k+ words
cw :
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ oc is mentioned ( ida )
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ non-idol!au
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ heeseung and reader were immature and dense asf
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ jake, chaeryeong, and reader casually refers each other as "bitch"
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ ( ft. en- & chaeryeong from itzy )
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ jay and mentioned oc are getting married
☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ not proofread ( yet )
song : already over - sabrina carpenter ( emails i can't send , 2022 ) & you're losing me - taylor swift ( from the vault , 2023 )
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
“A fucking Darry ring! Jay, you romantic fucker!” Chaeryeong squeals as soon as she sees the ring. “I didn't know you had it in you!”
“The fuck you mean you didn't know I had it in me? I've basically courted all three of you because you gatekept Ida so much in highschool!” Jay argued. To be fair, it really was the case. You three were looked at like feral cats whenever someone took the other. It took a lot of warming up for Heeseung back then when he started dating you. Ida and Chaeryeong have always been hesitant to let anyone in your heart, after all you have always been a woman with a goal and god knows what lengths your girls will take to make sure you get to your goals. You're just the same to them, so it was never a question for anyone. You never hesitated to bite whenever someone tried to hurt your girls. You saw each other through all of your phases, it was something that you learned overtime.
“But a Darry ring…” Chaeryeong trailed, holding Ida’s hand, admiring the shining diamond ring on her ring finger. You weren’t going to lie, the ring was beautiful, somehow, it really encapsulates the beauty of your friend just as well. You supposed Jay just knows her that well. “You’re gonna be stuck with this bitch for the rest of your life, Jongseong.”
“The fuck did you just say?”
“I don’t mind,” he replies lovingly.
You couldn’t help but feel your heart clench. You feel as though it was just yesterday when Heeseung would promise the same exact things to you and now you couldn’t bear to look at him. He was your bestfriend too—before you even met Chaeryeong and Ida. How did it even come to this?
“You’re quiet,” Jake chuckles, finding a seat next to you from the garden chair where you sat with your tablet, seemingly reviewing your fill for the weekend—bullshit, everyone knows you’re watching Chaeryeong admire the sparkling stone on Ida’s finger when everyone expected you and Heeseung to be the first to marry. And you thought so too. There was no other future than the one you once saw with Heeseung and it seemed to vanish into thin air when he needed more from you and there was nothing more than you could give.
“Do you want me to let the entire building know I’m here like Chaer is right now?” You playfully ask, trying to pull a grin for him to stop speculating.
“I’m saying all you have to do is admit that it hurts you, and it’s gonna feel a bit better.”
“I don’t have it in me to be hurt that my best friend is getting married to the love of her life.” You replied quietly, pretending to look at your tablet once again to avoid looking at Jake, who seemed to suddenly develop a magical skill to read your mind. “Ida deserves all that. I’m not supposed to be hurt that she’s going to spend the rest of her life with someone she wants to be with.”
“Ida does deserve to have her happy ending,” Jake nodded. “But it doesn’t make your feelings less valid.”
“I don’t get to be hurt over something that I brought upon myself.” You hummed, gathering your things to leave. But Jake managed to catch your hand, stopping you on your tracks.
“If he bothers you, just tell me and Chaer. We’ll take care of it.” He smiled at you pitifully before letting go of your hand.
“Thank you.”
It’s been years. You should’ve been over this long ago, and even though some days feel better than the others, you couldn’t help but blame yourself for how things went down with you and Heeseung.
You could still vividly remember how you cried in your study while Heeseung screamed and begged for you to say something—to fight him about something, that even just for a glimpse, show that you still care—but you tried to block him off, fully knowing that Heeseung was already ready to walk out of your life if you didn’t say a word and start an argument with him. But your medical admissions exams were coming up—you couldn’t fail your medical admission exams, your dad is already barely making enough to send you and your sister to school and your mom was sickly. You couldn’t fail and risk another year of hardship for your family.
Heeseung packed his bags and left that night. You didn’t reach out—kept pushing making sure you arose to the top of your class to retain your scholarship.
It’s been 3 years now. Your sister is in college and you were in medical school by means of your inheritance from your spinster aunt who had just passed away. While your father doesn’t have to work just as much because of your inheritance, he still has to make a living for him and your mom. What caused your and Heeseung’s drift was long resolved, but you didn’t have him anymore. You were on your own now.
“Are you okay, noona?” Riki points out as he reaches out to take your hand, pulling you back to reality as you stand in what you thought was an empty hallway. “You’re breathing fast.”
“Y-yeah, sorry.” You took your hand, immediately walking over to your shared room with Chaer to avoid talking about it even more.
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
“Have you said something?” Jay asked curiously as he stood next to Heeseung who seemed busy playing billiards with Sunghoon and Jake.
As if on cue, Sunghoon and Jake look up from the pool table to glance at Jay and Heeseung, who kept his eyes on the table, seemingly trying to ignore Jay.
“Hyung, you can't keep on ignoring Y/N over something you were already aware of,” Jake sighed, looking at Heeseung intently. “You knew it was virtually impossible for her to give what you wanted her to give during that time.”
“Was it really that hard to give?” Heeseung spat at him, fuming that his friends are refusing to side with him on this one. “She could've said something!”
“Hee, you were asking her to marry you!” Jake argued. “Before M-DEET! You know how important that is for her! One point off on that exam and the scholarship is down the drain—and you thought it was the best time to propose? Heeseung, your best friend was about to break and you thought popping the question was a great idea?”
Jay was just as furious. How could Heeseung be that inconsiderate to you? You've been there for him in the best way that you could for more years than the rest of the group and never failed to give an answer to him in all of those years and the first time you failed to do so, he walked away and allowed you to blame yourself for it? He is insane to think that!
“She could've said no, Jongseong! She could've told me she didn't want to marry me—”
“Do you really think Y/N was no longer in love with you, that's why you walked away?” Sunghoon mumbles quietly.
“Why else?” Heeseung rolls his eyes, staring at Sunghoon hard, slamming the cue stick on the table. “She was with Jake most of the time—she still is. Maybe she wanted to marry Jake!”
“Okay, foul—” Jake looked appalled at the accusation. “Number 1, maybe if you wanted to pursue medicine too, you would be in the conversation. Number 2, hyung, literally what the fuck—she spent the last three years wishing she said something because she loved the living fuck out of your stupid excuse of an existence. And number 3, if you don't get your ass together and make amends with Y/N, I swear to your stupid excuse of a living, God will ignore all your hopes and dreams like you are ignoring the truth right now.”
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
You say quietly by the deck, feet dipped in the cold lake water, listening to the cicadas sing their song for the night. It's been a while since you've had this kind of peace to yourself away from books and hospital halls. Don't get yourself wrong, you absolutely have no regrets on pursuing your dream—it wasn't just yours after all, it was your family's too. So, you really don't find it in you to regret putting everything in the line to chase for your medical degree. But man was it sad.
“You've been so quiet, babe,” Chaer mumbles quietly, which startled you a bit, making her laugh lightly as she settled next to you.
“The guys spoke to Heeseung-hyung,” Riki follows, sitting on your otherside.
“Why aren't you with them?” You asked. It's also been a while since all of you had a break, it was concerning to you why Riki wasn't spending it with someone he could relate to better and instead is preferring to sit here in boredom with you.
“I see them every time. It's been a while since I saw you and I wanted to make sure you were okay. You looked a bit shaken up a while ago,” the younger explains, reaching for your hand to fiddle with it. His hands were warm, unlike yours. You've always had freezing hands, you reckon it was the lack of sleep that caused your low-iron levels. A bit ironic to be unhealthy while pursuing a health-related program, but you suppose that's the way that it has to go. “Your hands are never warm.”
“They used to.” Chaer joked, before leaning her head against your shoulder.
“I'm going to push you bitch, don't try me,” you playfully threaten.
“But seriously, are you never going to talk about it?” Riki finally blurts out. “It's obviously taking a toll on you to be around him.”
“It's not the place for that—”
“Oh it is,” Chaer snorted. “It's all Ida and Jay are worrying about. You're going to be Ida's maid of honor and Heeseung is Jay's best man. You two are going to do a heck lot together when you take your break from school and start to do the wedding preparations with and for them. So it's smart to do this and let you guys sort it out. But the both of you seem to not get a fucking hint. So here we are.”
You sat flabbergasted at Chaer's expected bluntness. She always spoke before she could think, it was so in character of her to just blurt that out like it was nothing.
“Sweetheart, the way you and Heeseung ended isn't doing it good for the both of you—so whether you're going to get back together or close it off for good is going to be beneficial for everyone, especially you, once it's done.” She continued. “I don't understand why you're always so passionate to help and take care of people but never seem to take care of yourself. You purposely put yourself through shit and just expect yourself to live normally with it.”
“Do I really have the resources to not be in shit, Chaer?” You asked quietly, watching the calm lake and the moon sitting quietly on the horizon, lighting up the deck along with the light fixtures in the nearby gazebo. “I had a family to sustain and he was asking me to start a life with him. I couldn't do that and he knew it.”
“And I wanted to do just that. I wanted to marry him—but what about my family? What about Eunchae? Eomma? Appa? If it was just me, I would've said something. I would've just argued my entire night with him because I loved him more than I could ever possibly love myself but our future was on the line the next day. Did he ever think of that? He was my best friend! He should’ve known that!”
Chaer sat there listening to her, sloshing the water her feet were in. It was the first time in three years you ever talked about it. It was always hard for you and you drowned yourself in school to ever have time to speak about how you felt. And honestly, it felt lighter now. Your face was wet with tears and your chest was clenching but it was lighter now.
“I totally understand why Ida and Jay wanted to do this. But is it really possible? When Heeseung still thinks I just left him hanging for school?”
“Get your ass right there and speak it out, you wuss!”
All three of your heads turn to where the deck started, to see Sunghoon and Jake holding Heeseung by both of his arms, Sunoo and Jungwon following behind, making sure to catch Heeseung if he escapes the two holding him. Not too far away from the back door of the rest house, Jay and Ida stood with Jay's arm around your best friend's shoulders, laughing at the scene unfolding before them. They are sneaky motherfuckers for managing to pull this off, that’s for sure.
“Well, I think it's a conversation you two have to make now,” Chaer chuckled evilly at you, placing a soft kiss on you cheek before pushing herself up to stand on the deck and helping you and Riki.
Soon enough you and Heeseung were left alone. It was quieter now that everyone was dragged by Chaer inside the house to leave the two of you alone to talk it out.
Awkward. That’s what it is. You wouldn’t even look Heeseung in the eye. Were you afraid to fall for it again? Or were you afraid that it’ll taste more bitter now that you’re going to hear from Heeseung how selfish you were? Either way, it hurts. To be there and to not have the courage to say or do something. You could walk away… yeah that’s sensible. You could walk away and just leave things unsaid—it was the easy way out. But you know it’s not going to make anything better.
“In your entire lifetime, have you ever thought of kissing Jake?” Heeseung blurts out, sitting perfectly still. So still, that his feet weren’t creating ripples on the water it was dipped in.
Your eyes shoot wide as you sharply turn your body towards him, finding him looking at you intently, waiting for your response.
You? And Jake?
For as long as you could remember Jake has pined for Chaeryeong and you saw them as children that would die if they hadn’t got you to rely on ever since you started your pre-med. Jake has always been just a friend and for most of the years that you were friends with him, you were with Heeseung—you never thought of kissing Jake. You’ve always had Heeseung to do that with, it was nonsensical to think of ever kissing someone else.
Also, that was he thinking about all this time? That you and Jake were going to be a better pair than you and him?
“Is that why you walked away? You thought you would lose me to Jake?” You asked, appalled as you feel your heart doing somersaults inside your chest, gnawing at your ribcage, going berserk as you connect the dots right in front of you.
“Is it stupid?” he asked shamefully as he let out a huge sigh, eyes diverting towards his feet now. “You were with Jake for most of your time. I only see you when I come home from work after university and wake up with you getting ready to get in his car to start your day. What was I supposed to think?”
“Jake is your friend, Hee.” You utter, brows still furrowed but you didn’t have it in you to be mad at him—after all he had a point and you were finally hearing it for the first time. “Why would you think I would do that to you?”
“I know you wouldn’t. But Jake could. He has everything I don’t and I was immature to think that asking you to marry me would somehow give me comfort that it wasn’t going to happen because that’s what you do when people are upset. You offer them comfort. So when you weren’t arguing with me to somehow give me what I was needing that time I took it as a sign that I have already lost you to Jake. And I walked away.” You watch him intently, trying to figure out if he was being forced to do this or if he genuinely wanted to fix this after quite some time.
But Heeseung is Heeseung. He’s always been hard to predict. Was he really though? Or were you always too busy to notice what he was feeling that way?
You could’ve done something to mitigate the situation. You would’ve explained it better before you were in a tight situation where you physically and mentally couldn’t. How could you not notice? Heeseung is your best friend before everyone else. How come you never felt it?
“But I guess they were right. You had a dream and there’s nothing that could change your mind on that,” he sighed heavily. “It was immature. We were so young back then. Even I wouldn’t have known how I would’ve started that new chapter with you—it’s just that at that time, it was the only solution that I got. So I’m incredibly sorry for all the damage that I’ve caused.”
You didn’t quite know what to say. The confession was overwhelming that you found yourself speechless, just sitting there next to Heeseung, whom you know deep inside of your heart, despite all the pain he’s caused, you still loved so much. After all, you inflicted just as much pain to him when all that happened. But there were no words for the situation and it was eating you up that you didn’t know what to say. You felt like you were putting him in the same position as you did three years ago.
“I don’t know why I let my ego take so much of me in the past years to never reach out and try to fix this,” he continued. “It would be fine if you cannot forgive me right now. I can only hope that you do at some point in our lives—”
“Give me time to process it, Heeseung,” you blurted out, forcing yourself to say something. Even just for once, give it your all to never let Heeseung slip from your fingers again like you had done when you said nothing back then. “Give me time. That's all I want.”
“Take as much time as you want,” he smiles softly at you.
Oh you knew you were fucked when you saw that smile again. It’s like your demons were fighting themselves once again and not you anymore—you couldn’t explain it. You were happy and you haven’t felt that specific feeling of love and happiness for quite some time. How can it be so easy for Heeseung to do that to you?
On your third day out there, all of you found yourself sitting in a circle in the living room, with a couple of bottles of expensive sangria. It also turned out that you didn’t drink much because you were not blessed with the best alcohol tolerance that Chaeryeong and Jake had. After a couple glasses of sangria, you were already properly drunk off your face. But to your comfort, Ida was not any better. Jay had brought her to bed a good hour ago and the fact that you're still here, still sipping on your glass is an achievement itself.
“I miss when Jake wasn’t a bitch and he actually did not have to rely on me on Chaer to pass,” you blurted out, laughing as you leaned against Chaer.
“When was that? When wasn’t Jake a bitch?” Chaer laughed, unaware that she was actually sitting across from where you were instead of beside you. Heeseung could only smile as his heart swells at the sudden skinship. It’s been a while since he felt that way—or maybe he was just buzzed from the Sangria—or maybe he was falling in love. Either way, he doesn’t mind. Your hair smells nice, and you seem cozy resting your heavy head on his shoulder. “Jake is born a bitch and will die a bitch.”
“Why am I catching strays all of sudden?” Jake argues, sitting up straight as he pours Chaeryeong another glass.
“Because you’re a bitch!” You laughed continuously, completely off your face as you snuggled closer to what you thought was Chaeryeong. “I don’t even know why Heeseung thought I would choose you over him. The only thing I ever think of is whether or not it’s valid to pick a fight with you for giving me a headache all the time! Why would I even think about kissing you?”
“Y/N–”
“Girl, don’t even get me started—I have to call you so I can get up in the morning, I have to send you notes, keep up with your org work and your duty schedule because if I don’t you’d be a damned dead man walking! And why would I want to kiss you! Heeseung did that very well—”
“I do?”
You could feel the vibrations of his voice against the side of your head…oh shit.
Chaer… Chaeryeong… is sitting across you… next to Jake—
So then… who’s…. You sit up hastily and sharply turn towards him. You soon feel the alcohol washing out of you as soon as you realize that it wasn’t Chaeryeong you were leaning against all this time. Holy shit. You wanted the ground to open and swallow you whole right then and there— you couldn’t do it anymore.
“Tell me, baby. Did I kiss you well?” he asked again, watching as your eyes turned from shocked to dilated as you tilt your head slightly, smirking at him.
“You haven’t in a while. I wouldn’t dare to trust my judgment on that one,” you answer him. You don’t even know where it came from, liquid courage got the best of you in this one. Even Jay was sitting there, in shock of how risky you were getting.
“Wouldn’t you want to know?” he dared.
“Okay, you’re both drunk—” Jungwon stands up, panicked, preparing to pull you away before you do something you will regret.
“Oh let them be!” Chaer argues, pulling Jungwon back to his seat.
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
You woke up with a massive headache. You daresay the world might be spinning before you as you pull yourself up from your bed. The sun was shining too bright—God you don’t remember having your bed across a glass door, what the hell.
And why doesn’t it smell like Chaeryeong lavender humidifier?
You rub your eyes to try and get a grip on where you were. It didn’t take a few more blinks before you realized that this isn’t yours and Chaeryeong’s room.
“Fuck.”
Well, you were dressed at least. You weren’t hurting anywhere but your massive migraine to be so sure if you did hook up with anyone last night. Jesus, you couldn’t remember anything and every time you tried you were welcomed with a massive wave of headache.
“Well, at least you beat Ida too in waking up first.” Heeseung chuckled from the door, making you jump in surprise as you looked at him, shirtless with only his sweatpants on with a tray of breakfast.
“Why aren’t you dressed?” You yelled at him, looking away.
“It’s nothing you haven’t seen before, Y/N,” he chuckled as he settled the tray in front of you. “Eat up. You were out of it last night, Chaeryeong had to fight you to get you to change into your pajamas.”
“What did I do last night?”
“Do you really want to know?” He chuckled as he moved around at the foot of his bed to make himself comfortable.
“I woke up in your room— I’m already in too deep, nothing could be more embarrassing.”
“Well, aside from fighting Chaeryeong to get you to change, you also fought Jake to switch rooms with you so he can room with Chaer and you’d be in our room.” He started. “You insisted we had a serious matter to talk about but as soon as you were lying on the bed you refused to sleep until I gave you a kiss.”
“So did you?” you asked, reaching for the cup of ginger tea on the tray.
“You did sleep, didn’t you?”
“Too bad I can’t remember it,” you hummed nonchalantly, closing your eyes as you enjoyed your tea. “Do you want to discuss the important matter now?”
“Do you even remember what the important matter was?” he replied.
It was as if you could feel the room slowly turn cold as you peel your eyes open, seeing Heeseung look at you intently.
Of course you know what the important matter was. It was an important matter before you were drunk. It was an important matter before you were here in the first place.
“We were always an important matter to me, Hee,” you sighed. “I’m sorry I made you feel like it wasn’t three years ago.”
“It’s forgiven,” he replied shortly. “You had a lot on your plate and it took me a while to realize that. I should be the one asking for your forgiveness.”
“We both drew blood, Hee,” you said, softly, moving the tray to move closer to him. “And I fucked up just as much as you think you did. All I want to talk about is how do you want to move forward from this.”
“Would I be crazy to say that I want us to try again?”
You could feel your heart skip a beat as soon as you heard Hee asked you that. There’s nothing you wanted more than to have your Heeseung back. To have someone to hold and go home to. To be at home at last.
“It would be even more crazy of me if I declined that after years of manifesting fate would bring you back to me,” you smiled at him.
The next thing you knew he was moving the tray out of the bed, proposing something else for breakfast. You couldn’t care less, though. Your problems were all solved. Just have to survive medical school and everything else is in place—even if it wasn’t, at least Heeseung has you now—you don’t mind adversity, especially if it meant, Hee was there to hold your hand through it.
—end.
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
masterlist
a/n : hiiiiiii i'm so sorry for being mia ! internship and everything else with my personal life and school has been taking a toll on my mental health and i had to step back a bit which resulted into this ( along with the mob fic that i've been trying to write ) being pushed to the backburner but it's here now ! i would also like to thank u guys sm for the love you've given home race winner i genuinely did not think that fic would do well but i'm glad u guys enjoyed it ! i hope u guys enjoy this as much as that one !!
also if you have requests, or any plot ideas whether it may be for a part 2 of my other previous works lemme know here or dm me ! i'll try my best to write itttt ! ( might post my requests reminders later on but i'll let u guys know immediately if i'm uncomfy with the req, it's my first time doing this and i still don't have a concept of what i can and can't write so might still figure that out along the way )
tnx for making it this far <33
xo, anya ୨୧
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