#‘Will it kill you to smile?’ ‘maybe’ BANGER LINE

[kierancaz]

The og Teen Titans cartoon is WILD

The season 2 episode 5 about Raven’s fear genuinely had me on edge like I WAS SCAREDDDD BRO OH MY GOD

And then the next episode we have a dude with just an entire spider as his head that drags the limp human body along with it.

AND IN THAT SAME EPISODE WE GET FUCKING MOTHMAN SAYING “sorry kitten daddy was at work” WHICH IS HILARIOUS AND I LOVE IT AND I’M SO HAPPY 2020 TIKTOK DID NOT GET AHOLD OF THAT

“Who is this girl and why does she call you poo?” STARFIRE I LOVE YOU ‼️‼️

[marleyybluu]

Boy, Bye

Spooky x black!fem!reader

Words: 3k

Warnings: 18+, smut central (with plot), flirting, mentions of drinking and drug use (relax it's just weed), smoking and driving (but don't be this stupid), Spooky being a nervous boy at the end, fingering, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap that bitch up we don't need any more crotch goblins jk), creampie because I'm a sick bitch, Spanish nicknames as usual, probably misspelling bcus I was high as shit writing this. lmk if i missed anything

A/N: This was inspired by Boy, Bye by Ari Lennox, her album age/sex/location is a banger I have rediscovered it and the idea hit me like a brick. I do wanna say I don't mention the readers skin tone or anything but she is a black woman bcus i mentioned a fresh set of braids. and black women should be the only ones wearing box braids, wigs, etc... in case yall forgot :)

Not my gif.

The distinct chatter of club patrons droned out of your ears as a persistent ringing replaced it. You sat at the bar, your back turned to counter and your elbows planted firmly on the surface. Just minding your business. Drinking your rum and coke.

"You look sweet like mangoes." A very hot and unwarranted breath invaded your space and it was a reminder as to why you didn't want to come out in the first place. Men were gross, they ruined everything with catcalls and what they think are sweet pickup lines. You turned your head to look at him, he flashed a drunken smile— his teeth crooked and filled with whatever he'd eaten before he got here. You rolled your eyes and turned your attention back to the crowd.

He wasn't the first to approach you tonight, especially since you dispersed from your group to sit at the bar, your feet killing you from the stupid but cute heels you wore. "Sweet like mangoes huh?" You reiterated. He nodded leaning in closer as you leaned away. "Yeah. I know."

The man chuckled at your lack of a 'thank you.'

"Now why are you acting like that? Hm? A man can't get to know you?"

You wrapped your lips around your straw and sipped obnoxiously but he wasn't budging. "A man whose leftovers aren't in his teeth can get to know me." You bit. The man leaned back in disbelief, your comment seemingly sobering him up. "Well, fuck you then bitch."

You raised your glass. "You wish you could." That added fuel to the fire and he stormed off like a pissed off toddler. You smiled taking the last sip of your drink, turning around to place it on the bar, you needed a bit of time before you ordered another, might be the last before you go home. You hopped off the stool and grabbed your purse heading to the restroom, surprisingly there was no line but a few girls were hogging the vanity reapplying whatever makeup had come off. You shuffled inside the small stall and propped your purse on the hook of the door.

Once you were done handling business the women had disappeared and you had the sink to yourself, you washed your hands and dried them off with the paper towels provided, and you checked yourself out flipping your fresh braids to the side finding that was cuter than just having a middle part. When you were satisfied you headed back out putting a little pop in your hips. On your way back to your spot you noticed a man, a young man maybe about your age, sitting in on the seat next to yours. You shrugged and headed over anyway hopping back up without saying a word.

You pulled out your phone and noticed a notification from the group chat, one of the girls asking if you were okay and where were you. As you typed you remained oblivious to the stranger next to you, unaware of the little glances that he took at you. He tipped his head back as he drank from his Corona, you sighed putting your phone down. "You're good?" He asked, genuinely, to your surprise. You looked over at him and nodded. Your eyes analyzed whatever you could see in the shitty and low lighting. The first thing you noticed was the shaved head, not really your thing but it was cute on him, his bushy eyebrows raised in interest watching you examine him. He sported a small moustache and a goatee, the sides were clean-shaven, his slim and aquiline nose complimented him as well and with a nose like that, you wondered how the rides were on that face.

"Can I get you a drink?" He asked breaking the silence, you'd accept it, telling him thanks and allowing him to wave over the bartender. You remembered seeing a whiskey sour on the little drink menu and ordering that while he ordered another Corona. He smiled at you, his cheeks so high it made his eyes squint, and you tugged at your bottom lip. "Don't worry I don't have any corny ass pickup lines like the rest of these putos." He reassured. You playfully dismissed him. "Eh, they aren't so bad." Lies.

He turned himself in the stool, his whole body facing you-- one leg on the footrest of the seat and the other on the floor. Your eyes involuntarily dropped down to his lap and quickly back up to his eyes. "Yeah? So, how come you pushed 'em all away?"

He'd been watching you?

"'Cause none of them bought me a drink." You flirted. "Oooh, so that's why I haven't gotten dissed yet?"

You shrugged. "Maybe."

"I can respect that."

Your drinks arrived and you thanked the bartender. He raised his bottle. "Salud."

"Salud." You copied. You took a sip and shook your head, damn that really is sour. He snorted at the way your face contorted. "Don't like it?"

"Didn't expect it to be that sour."

"I could get you a different drink."

You passed. "It's okay, I can handle it. Plus I wouldn't want one of your little girlfriends seeing you buy me more than one drink."

He rolled his eyes bringing his drink to his lip, "No girlfriends over here."

"Surprised."

"Why?"

You set your whiskey sour down and boldly stated, "You're way too fine to be alone." He turned his head away from you, a warm feeling spreading across his face but he couldn't let you see it. "Thanks, mamita." He responded turning back to your direction. "You sure your man won't fight me for buying you one? 'Cause I can put up a good fight cariño."

You tilted your head to the side, smitten. "No boyfriend's over here."

"Good to know."

— — Your once drastic and boring night was starting to look upward. Spooky, you found out to be his name, was good conversation. Yeah, he threw a corny line here and there but you actually liked them coming from him, he wasn't trying too hard he was just being playful.

Your eyes landed on the imprint on his neck, a crucifix tilted on its side with the name Santos etched down the middle. "Los Santos... hm are you?"

"Am I what?"

You leaned into him your hand finding its way to the side of his neck and gently dragging your nails on his inked skin. "A saint."

His eyes focused more on your lips. "More of a sinner." He mumbled. You giggled tipsily. "Boy, bye."

The DJ had announced it was the last song of the night, you looked at your phone reading 3 AM, your plans to leave early had been disrupted in the best way. Spooky noticed your attention detour. "Ready to go home?"

You sighed now not wanting the night to end. "Guess so."

"I could drop you home."

Your eyes sharpened, you didn't know him... but, fuck, you liked him enough to almost agree to it. "I don't know if I want a sinner dropping me home."

He put his hand over yours, the contact sparked a warm feeling in your lower belly. He guided your palm to his chest. "I'll be a saint,cielito, don't worry."

You laughed wholeheartedly. "That was so fucking lame."

"Made you laugh though."

It did.

You agreed to take the ride and while he paid for the drinks you texted the group:

Y/n: got a ride home ;) I'll talk to you bitches tomorrow.

They gassed you up for any potential activity tonight and hoped that you'd get home safely. Spooky got off first and held his hand out to help you down, he didn't let go as he led you through the crowd, he met up with the boys you assumed he came with and dapped them up with his free hand, his other one never letting go of yours.

Soon, you two were out the door, you lowkey stumbled through the parking lot, alcohol and heels were never a good combo. He helped you though. And you two arrived in front a Red Impala, your mouth twitched with fascination. "Nice car." You blurted out. "Thanks ma, worked on it myself."

"Damn, he's cute and a mechanic? You sure no one is crazy over you?"

He opened the door for you. "No, just you."

"I'm not crazy, yet." You pointed before sliding inside. He closed your door and headed over to his side. Your body was full of tingles, the feeling reaching your toes but you didn't know if it was the buzz from your drink or if it was him. Either way, you were enjoying this.

Spooky pulled off. You sighed and smiled lazily throwing your head back, you were floating— your body felt like it was flying through space. "You smoke?" He asked, you heard a lighter flicker and you shook your head. "I do, but I can't take anything else right now."

He shrugged and inhaled the THC, he reached for the dial on his stereo and turned up the volume, the music he was playing earlier resuming its beat. Sierra Leone by Frank Ocean serenaded your ears. "I love this song."

You hummed along to the slow tune. Spooky caught you in the corner of his eye, he smiled. He enjoyed the show and the company until he pulled up to your neighbourhood and into your driveway. You groaned, did he really have to go?

You notice him turn the car off. "You're not coming inside you know."

He smirked. "Don't worry, I'm just taking you to the door at least."

You slightly frowned, he left you for a few seconds before your door opened and he offered his hand once again. You successfully landed on your feet, your hand moulded with his and now it was your turn to lead him. Up the steps. You fumbled with your keys until you found the correct one, you felt nervous under his gaze. Those low eyelids undressing you, you just knew it. Your key slid into the slot and turned it unlocking your door. "Thanks... for the ride."

"No problem, ma." You looked up as he towered over you. His energy pulled you in, you were drunk but you weren't that drunk. Maybe he could come in for a little bit.

— — Clothes spread across your bedroom floor, the sheets sliding off the bed like melted cheese. You two were in a tangle of limbs, naked bodies pressed against each other, his nose brushed yours as he planted the softest kiss on your lips. Your hands flew to his flushed cheeks pulling him in with eagerness and at the same time, his slender finger running over your blue panties. You smiled against his lips. His kisses were so warm and passionate. 

He used his fingers to tug at your panties, hauling them to the side. You whined feeling him run them between your wet folds, collecting and salivating your juices. He toyed with your clit, slowly and steadily, your hips bucking up to chase his touch. Ending your short misery a finger entered your heat, you gasped in the middle of your kiss and your eyebrows knitted together, your face reading 'finally.' You smiled hazily against his lips once he pulled it out and plunged back in with an additional finger. "Fuuuuck."

He skillfully curled his fingers up hitting that spongey spot, that sweet spot. You squirmed under him with pleasure and anticipation... desperation, for more. You sat up on your elbows looking down and seeing his fingers work their magic on you, your mouth fell open, pushing your hips forward once again. You just wanted more.

You looked back up at him. "You're so pretty when you make that face, cariño." He complimented. The heel of his hand brushed against your pulsing clit, you clenched around his fingers causing a smirk to appear on his face. "S-shit, please."

"Please what mi amor?"

For once, you were in no mood for foreplay, you were very slick and sticky with arousal. "Just fuck me, please."

He smiled shaking his head at your earnest request, he continued his teasing assault on your sweet spot, his lips connecting to your neck, your eyes rolling at the immense pleasure you were receiving. Your hand on the back of his neck holding him in place. "Yes... oh... yes!" He was pulling your orgasm closer and closer, your hips raised off the mattress. "I thought you just said you wanted me to fuck you?"

"I-I do."

"Doesn't seem like it now." He evilly chuckled. The sound of your pussy juice and your frantic whimpers went straight to his dick, his growing erection poking at your leg. "I'm gonna cum." You wept. Spooky slowly pulled out his fingers leaving you on the brink of an orgasm, you groaned glaring at him. He winked wrapping his lips around the fingers that were just inside you, he licked off your essence until his fingers were clean. You giggled dropping your head on the pillow.

Spooky pulled off his boxers and his dick sprung out with a wet thud once the tip hit his lower abdomen, fuck he was so hard, you drooled at the sight spreading your legs further apart. He wrapped his hand around his girth sliding his tip between your soaked folds before carefully pushing his length inside you. Your voice broke at the feeling of him against your gummy walls, enveloping every inch he had to give you. Your bottom lip finds comfort between your teeth, your head tipped back and your toes curled. His sack hits your ass as he bottomed out. Filled you to the brim.

Spooky held his position, enjoying the feeling of you wrapped around him. His warm hands find solace on the back of your thighs, sliding up to the crook of your knee. You felt as he pushed your legs back, your knees touching your chest. He pulled his hips back and pushed them forward flush against your pelvis his coarse curly hair at the base of his shaft brushing against your clit, an additional sensation. 

Your hands wrapped around his wrists as he rocked into you, giving you strokes you've never felt in your life. Your mouth fell open, breathless whispers leaving your throat, egging him on about how well he stretched you, how full you felt with him inside you. "Fuck, fuck, fuck! That feels so-o good." 

Spooky smirked looking down at you, your various love faces so beautiful being contorted with pleasure. He leaned down, your legs now planted on his shoulders, he kissed your nose and then forehead before pressing his against it. There was a mix of sounds-- his grunting, your erotic moans and the sound of skin on skin bounced off the walls, if you lived in an apartment they'd probably knock on the wall to complain. 

You could feel yourself leaking, dripping, onto the sheets and coating his dick in your desire. "You're so fucking pretty when you're taking me, princesa. Eres muy guapa." He groaned, your head fell back, your high carefully approaching once again. Your nails left crescent shapes on his skin. "Shit! I like being inside you, you're so fucking wet, bebita." 

Your walls constantly fluttered around him. He hissed and you smirked. "I know you feel that, fuck, I'm gonna cum for you." 

His hand slipped between sweaty bodies, his fingers finding your clit once again. You wrap your arms around the back of his neck, his teeth nibble at your jaw. "Right there! Uh-huh, right fucking there!" Spooky pounded into you, hard yet maintaining rhythm. Your eyes are glossy with incoming tears, the overstimulation of it all. "Fucking squeeze me, mamita. I got you, cum on this dick." 

His words tip you over and your body tenses up and your eyes fall into the pit of your skull. He felt every pulsation of your orgasm, his tip constantly hitting your spot. He held up his weight, his hands rested on your lower back fingers gripping your ass cheeks. His thrusts became sloppier as he helped your ride out your orgasm and his quickly approaching. "Oh my god," You hazily giggle. "Fuck! Yeah, use me to get yourself off, please. Cum wherever you want, baby, give it to me." 

Spooky pushed in one more time, you faintly smiled at the feeling of his warm spend squirting inside of you. You were both out of breath, Spooky leaned back and sat on his knees with his softening dick still buried inside you. He helped take your legs off his shoulder and you mumbled in pain. "Shit... I mean I didn't expect you to actually fold me." 

He laughed. "I said I was gonna do it." He spoke in reference to his warning earlier when you lured him into your house. He leaned down once again to give you an affectionate kiss. "You feeling okay?" 

"More than okay." You confessed. "Good," He kissed your nose before pulling out, you almost pouted at the loss. "You're okay if I grab some water?" 

You nodded telling him there were bottles in the fridge, he shot you a thumbs up and put on his boxers before he left, once he was out of your sight you let out a big sigh of relief and a very bright smile was sure to follow. You felt so giddy, butterflies were making their home in your nervous system. What the fuck was this feeling? 

Spooky grabbed two bottles and made his way back upstairs, offering you one. You thanked him and sat up as carefully as you could. You caught a prideful smirk on his face. "Don't start." You warned him, he put his hands up in defence. 

"What are you doing tomorrow?" He asked out of the blue. "Not much, why?" 

"Uh, I'm not one to overstep my boundaries and it's up to you,  really, but do you want to get something to eat?" 

You nodded. "Of course. Any places in mind?" 

"There's a... breakfast bar... downtown." He sounded more nervous with that statement. You blushed. "Breakfast? Oh, so you want to spend the night with me, Spooky?" 

He suddenly felt like an idiot, he was very much a one-night stand or a friends-with-benefits person but with you, he kind of wanted to see if this could go somewhere. "If that's cool with you." 

You set your bottle down on the nightstand, you smiled propping yourself up on your hands and knees. You crawl over to him and kiss his temple, you go down to nibble his ear and whisper; "If you keep fucking me like that, I just might have to keep you." 

He shivered, his dick jumped at the thought alone. Quickly the roles were reversed back his fingers intertwined with yours as he put you on your back. 

"I better get to work then."

If you liked this fic, feel free to like this fic. comments and reblogs are always appreciated.

peace and love, see you in the next one.

🏷: @darqchilddaydreamz @skyesthebomb @realhotgurlshit

if i'm missing any tags or if you'd like to be tagged in any upcoming fics let your girl know.

[touloserlautrec]

Writer Q&A Tag Game

Thanks for the tag, @ntzsche9! You can find their answers here — and there are some absolute bangers in there.

Gently, no pressure tagging: @camillenrose @pandoras-comment-box @scribe-of-stories @thatndginger @sunset-a-story

1. What motivates you to write?

I can’t not think about stories. If I didn’t write (or pressure @sunset-a-story into co-writing a given scene XD oopsies), I’d just go out of my mind with stories bursting from the seams. It’s how I mainline dopamine.

2. A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

Probably this excerpt from Arc 1:

Mackenzie held her eyes for a moment amidst the table’s laughter. It seemed like nothing could ever make her flinch. “The reality is, there is no fairness,” she said. Her voice was rich and deep like velvet wrapped around a sharp knife. “No justice, no karma, no great equalizer. Not even death.” The table fell silent as she spoke. The woman knew how to command attention and respect. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned in all my days, it’s that we’re not built to hold it in our fragile minds-- this reality that no amount of integrity, righteousness, or fortitude will overcome the affliction of human nature.” She looked at each of them, straight in the eyes. “But if there’s another thing I’ve learned, it’s that those same fragile minds are a weapon. We’re not built to hold that knowledge because that knowledge is useless to us.” Her voice hardened. “This is a war of attrition. Our fragile minds may shatter like glass at that knowledge but shattered glass can slice a man’s throat. Even the tiniest shards can cut up your insides and kill you if you’re made to swallow them. Death may not equalize the world, but it can damn well make a man piss himself. So we let our minds block out the parts that hold us back and we’ll force-feed them the undoing they’ve sown. There have been days when I’ve known everything there is to know, and I can’t hold it all forever, but the one thing that I can’t un-know is that things change. They mutate because of some small itch or tiny displacement. Just look at us. Knacks. Mutations. Impossible changes. Motherfucking pearls.” She picked up the bottle of scotch and started pouring again. “So, Fredericka. You were robbed. They will try to make you thank them for it. Don’t give that to them. Instead, keep your head held high and make them choke on it.”

3. Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

Oooh how do I choose from my babies???? I think Alex is probably the head of the pack— he’s just got so much growth and bravery, and it’s comforting that he lives inside me. On the other hand, Emmett is a very strong contender because he’s such an unhinged, confident person, who does absolutely nonsense things. I can’t help but cackle along with him, and I try to channel him when I need to be confident.

5. What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

I think it’s probably gotta be characters. I think I am pretty good at coming up with interesting, well-rounded characters with unique voices, and writing their inner dialogue and inner workings to further flesh them out.

6. What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

The engagement and encouragement. It was starting to really get crushing to constantly post things to Facebook and Instagram and get pretty much no response, so having a place where people are actively encouraging and lifting each other up feels really good and motivating.

7. A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

Hmm. Google docs has been a life saver in co-writing and organizing this behemoth of a story. The other thing, weird as it may seem, is drawing— drawing and seeing my characters helps me feel inspired to write/brainstorm more story, and vice versa.

8. A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

My favorite piece of world building is The Church. Their weird way station homes, the constant sense of grossness and pared down utilitarianism that comes with being nomadic and single-minded. Their unflagging faith and spirituality of all different sorts. The most welcoming, safest, unwavering hospitality. I love the weird combination of those things. It also lets me indulge my lil’ pagan heart (even with non-pagan characters tbh, because the way they interact with any God(ess)/Spirit/Being, no matter which religion, has so much conviction and deep knowing that it is True and Real and Manifest). Their lifestyle and mission is so compelling to me.

9. What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

We’re always taught to write with the audience in mind, and to an extent that’s true, but first and foremost, write what you want to read, write because it’s fun, and then read your own stuff over and over because you love it and it inspires you to keep going. Read other work too, don’t get me wrong, but just… let yourself enjoy it. Be your own fandom.

[wanderingchocolateeclair]

hhh circus of death au <3 (<- contains so much love) --

You’re strangled, choking in the middle of an audience, all eyes on you and on nothing else. Isn’t it grand to be in the center of everything? Worthless urchin, greedy dancer, graceful thing. Shouldn’t you be grateful that you at least get to die pretty? You get to die, that's the thing. This is it. It's almost over, almost done.

You get to engrave your struggles and the way your tears roll down and fall to the floor, the way your cries are caught by the cloth of the circus’ tent. What a blessing- what a curse- every performer's envy, the end, your swan song, your falling curtain.

There you dangle, held by the things that killed you and kept you alive, the centerpiece of this macabre and threadbare performance. Real or not real? Your head swims through the thick haze of being alive. Not enough air. So many eyes. Is this happening? Your hands are bloodied and clawing at your silks. Your hands are gouging red lines into your throat and jaw, skin peeling apart as your body fights for air. Your body thrashes. Twitches. The throes of a dying thing. The strings aren't cut. You would be screaming if you could. Choked and tangled noises coming from your lips.

It hurts. 

You try not to move because moving pulls the silks tighter around your throat. It’s warm, too warm, and the music of the circus and the haze of bright colours spin around you. Your funeral march is played by trumpets. The gorgeous caliope, sound blaring bright and cheery, carrying for miles. It drowns out the murmuring of the audience. Maybe it smothers the screams. Is that you? Is that them?

Do they think you’re pretty? Do they think this is entertaining? Do they think that this is horrible, horrifying, and they wish you would just die already? You don't know which one's worse. Which one's better.

You hate them. You love them. It's all you have left. 

You gag at the influx of saliva pooling around your tongue. You do wish you would die already. Or not. The audience, it all depends on the audience, remember? 

Smile, ariealist. Smile as you die, smile as your body stills and rigor mortis sets in- the maggots crawling in you, you can feel them crawling across your skin. You haven't even died yet.

Or is that just the crowd's gaze? The ringmaster's gaze? 

Your head smiles as it’s tangled in the silk strands you loved so much in life. 

Your body falls to the floor, painting it a lovely, brilliant red, matching with the red stripes on the tent. 

The show goes on. It must always go on. It will be. It’s the last show, your last show, and it will keep on going on after your death. Atop your body, even. Will your head be called a token of luck, good or bad?

But fire will always catch where there is kindling. Your body will burn on the pyre. Your head will remain, ever-smiling, ever rotting, in that perpetual state of being. Unless- unless, unless... 

-- -story anon

:D

WOO STORY ANON AT IT AGAIN WITH THE BANGERS!!

MY FAVOURITE SNIPPET <3333

the imagery, the scene, the sounds and colours <333

[poetlcs]

2024 album listens

Recording all the albums I listened to in full for the first time in 2024. Albums released this year are marked with a *

Making Movies by Dire Straits. 5/5 Top 3: Romeo and Juliet, Hand to Hand, Tunnel Of Love

Light, Dark, Light Again by Angie McMahon 4/5 Top 3: Saturn Returning, Divine Fault Line, Staying Down Low I liked this album but I thought some songs sounded a little samey samey. It reminded me of Punisher a lot.

I Put a Spell on You by Nina Simone 4/5 Top 3: Feelin' Good, One September Day, July Tree I've listened to a lot of the songs on this album but never the whole thing top to bottom. I love her voice so much. I just think some of the best songs on this album are a LOT better then some of the lesser songs.

Summer Days by San Cisco. 3/5 top 3: summer days, lost without you, high I love San Cisco but lately their music hasn't hit as much. I thought this was a fairly so so album. Songs were nice but it felt a little uninspired

MADRA by newdad. 4.5/5 top 3: nosebleed, angel, sickly sweet BANGER of an album. Super cohesive with some really interesting riffs and bits and bobs on each song. I was shocked to see this is a debut album. one of those albums where you immediately go back to relisten to the songs. only took the 0.5 away cos I think it's slightly too long

Loss of Life by MGMT. 3/5 top 3: dancing in babylon, bubblegum dog, nothing changes It's okay - I just thought it didn't really stick. Like not much REALLY stood out

eternal sunshine by ariana grande. 4/5 top 3: supernatural, I wish I hated you, we can't be friends & bye This was close to being perfect but I really think it needed a powerful ballad in the middle and the writing to me was okay in parts but overrall i really liked it. her vocals sound amazing this is the first ari album I've truly enjoyed since thank u next

the rise and fall of a midwest princess by chappell roan 4.5/5 top 3: after midnight, red wine supernova, coffee bit late to this one IM SORRY but wow this is such a fun and excellent album. I couldn't stop smiling the entire way through. I love that it also has some more slow and intimate moments too. Really embodying the idea of the rise and fall in the way the tone goes up/down sad/happy you know. It feels both familiar and new at the same time which I love. Sort of reminded me of melodrama in the structure which I LOVE. The ONLY reason I took off the 0.5 is because I feel the start of the album was a lot stronger then the end. I even think possibly one song could be cut. But it's very good! loved it!

grace by jeff buckley. 4.5/5 top 3: lover, you should've come over, hallelujah, forget her I've probably listened to 70% of this album just never sat down to listen to it all in a row. anyways LYSCO/Hallelujah has to be one of the craziest back to back song pairings ever. This is suchh a beautiful album my ONLY issue is I don't like eternal life and don't think it fits the vibe. Amazing album though

cowboy carter by beyonce. 4/5 top 3: texas hold em, bodyguard, blackbiird I thought the production of this was the highlight. Also loved how stylistic it was, I love a concept album. Thought the first half was stronger and it's too long, which is why it's a 4 star. Blackbiird cover was GORGEOUS, Jolene cover I don't love as much. The original tracks are great with a feww I don't love as much. Overall very good! I will be listening a lot

found heaven by conan grey. 3/5 top 3: killing me, winner, alley rose I think I wanted to like this more than I did. I really love new wave and the production was GREAT, literally sounded like a song off an 80s album. But I overall found it kind of derivative. It was like oh yep thats the elton song, thats the joy division song, thats the queen song. It felt almost inauthentic at times, and maybe it's just because cowboy carter just came out and showed us all how it's done but it just felt too much like copying music rather than being inspired by. Some of the songs were big misses for me, and the highlights were definitely the ones with more vulnerable lyrics and singing.

[llycaons]

ep26 (1/2): the worst banquet in the history of the world and that was BEFORE wwx barged in threatening to murder a guy

don't care much about su she beyond a vague sense of pity but on watching this scene I do aupport the people who think he's desperate for jgy to fuck him

this is the most painful smile jc has ever worn I'm losing it. he looks SO tense and miserable

when jzx is pressuring the lans, into drinking, the camera focuses briefly on jgs in the background. interesting! he's watching this closely, he has vested interest in dominating the lans (and others)

THIS FACE. god he's so pissed off. in his eyes you can tell he's ready to kill

the classic 'don't drink and fly the sword'

oh he is NOT having it. actually that's what was missing from that last fic I read. the characterization was good except that lwj wasn't stiff or intense enough. canon lwj is inflexible, set in his ways, and constantly irritated

wwx coming up the steps looked pretty cool Ilove it when he dramatically enters buildings

maybe it would have gone better if wwx has approached jc first to present a more united front, but maybe not. unlikely that jgs would simply give up on the STA, knowing how easy it is to manipulate jc and split them up. and wwx appears to have long since lost his trust in jc

just banger after banger line in this scene. first time I heard this I was like 'OOHHHHHHHHHHH'

jc running up to wwx to demand what he's doing and wwx COMPLETELY ignores him to say this. no wonder jc is so mad about this...wwx literally didn't even acknowledge him

oh jgs did NOT like that at all. idc how on-the-nose this might be, it's just thrilling to wait this all stated so plainly. any AU wwx that doesn't start shit isn't wwx

SAY THAT!!!!!

I love how ready he is to murder. the sta and trauma may be making him reckless and arrogant and prone to violence but like. they all deserve it

INSANE <3

mockingly saying this is so funny. he's such a bitch sometimes

the quality of viki video turned really shitty for a few minutes so I apologize in advance

okay I know this is a horrifying scene about the torture of wen ning but is that a paper mache mallet??? is that the best they could have come up with???

wild how jgy was like 'he confronted jzx about murder which he did do but we're not supposed to TALK about it my goodness!' and lwj is like '???? he was right though"

jgy has had some good lines but that is a bullshit defense

the way lxc just knows....

I have some fondness for lxc as a brother but no respect for him as a person

CLASSIC. jc crushing a golden cup with his bare hands in public because he obviously can't control himself definitely does not factor into the way he's treated by other cultivators oh no. it's all wwx's fault

[tma-entity-song-poll]

Battle of the Fear Bands B2R1: The Corruption

Stalker's Tango:

"toxic love is very corruptiony"

Parasite:

“I want everyone to stop and give this song a listen right now. A, because it's a banger, and B, because it's literally about a disease/parasite as a way to represent a toxic relationship. It doesn't get more corruption-coded than this”

Lyrics below the line!

Stalker's Tango:

I know, I know, I know this situation's strange It takes a little getting, a little getting used to Love me, love me, love me, love me Love me, love me, love me, love me Love me, love me, love me, love me more Than you possibly can It's not that complicated, no matter what they say You'll never meet another me It's not that difficult to get your head around You'll never meet another me You'll never-never-ever-never ever meet another me I know, I know, I know I'm always in your place But don't you see, my dear? I am your Doppelgänger Have your faith so Love me, love me, love me, love me Love me, love me, love me, love me Love me, love me, love me, love me more Than you possibly can It's not that complicated, no matter what they say You'll never meet another me It's not that difficult to get your head around You'll never meet another me You'll never-never-never-ever-ever meet another me Ey-ey-ah Bada-bam-bam-bam-bam Bada-bam-bam-bam-bam Bada-ba-ah Bam-bam-bam-bam Bada-bam-bam-bam-bam Bada-bam-bam-bam-bam Bada-ba It's not that complicated, no matter what they say I'll never meet another you It's not that difficult to get my head around I'll never meet another you

Parasite:

Something serious is coming over me. Something evil’s infiltrated my body. It’s suffocating being unable to see what I’m becoming as disease takes over me. Something serious has found it’s way to me, burning my veins and destroying my body. I’m panicking as the former me recedes, in their place a monster me smiling. Maybe there’s a chance to save me. Maybe the disease will take me. I’m trapped inside a monster that looks just like me. Say this destroys my body and leaves me a catastrophe. I’m terrified that I’m forgetting what once was me. First infection takes it’s hold and leaves my body deathly cold. It’s killing me, but I can’t help but feign apathy. Soon after my skin is torn, upon raw skin a new face is born. So I cannot see as the parasite takes over me. It feels like my body’s caving in. Every diseased cell seems so foreign. But each time my condition worsens, my fears disappear and my will lessens. But you’re why my life’s caving in. And your disease is so foreign. But each time you damage me some more, I almost find myself wanting more, but, Why was I worried? There’s nothing wrong with me. All this “plague” has done is improve my body. I’m striving now ‘cause I’m unable to see what you’ve done to become a part of me. Why am I worried? Is something wrong with me? I’m recalling the person I used to be. I’m horrified of what’s become of me. “A monster,” says the mirror, solemnly. I’ve been eaten from the inside out and I can’t even cry for help. I’ve gotten lost and I can’t find my way out. If I don’t fight back then you’ll make me a shell of what I used to be. But I won’t ever let you do that to me. I’VE BECOME A PART OF YOU AND I’VE ENSURED YOU’LL DIE WITHOUT ME TOO. ‘CAUSE YOU’VE LOST EVERYTHING BUT I’LL STAY WITH YOU. YOU SAY I’M A PARASITE BUT YOU’VE BECOME A FRIEND O’ MINE. SO IF THAT’S TRUE, THEN YOU’VE BECOME A PLAGUE LIKE ME TOO. Tear away from your cold hold. Destroy the bones that you called home. It’s killing me but I’m taking you down with me. Sever all the ties we had. It’s freeing me, but hurts so bad. It’s misery, but I know you’re dependent on me. Finally, the plague is gone but still, I know that something’s wrong. ‘Cause part of me was destroyed and I had failed to see. Did I win, or did he succeed in the end? I can’t tell when all that once was mine, was lost when I fell to the parasite

[gubler-me-up]

A Man After Midnight

Request: can you do a extremely dirty and down right filthy smut with dom spencer and fem/sub reader. like with heavy degradation, overstimulation, dirty talk, slapping, choking. basically just down right smut. if not it’s okay :)

A/N: Thanks for the prompt, anon! Fun fact: I was listening to Abba’s Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight) slowed+reverb when I made this title because the song was doing something when I was reading this request. Feel free to listen to it while reading, it’s a BANGER! This is a longer than usual fic since all the fics I’ve published recently were shorter, but there was a lot to do here LOL And I’m posting it after midnight, so does that make me a woman after midnight? Anyway, hope you enjoy!!

Couple: Dom!Spencer/Sub Fem!Reader

Category: SMUT (NSFW 18+)

Content warning: Heavy degradation, slapping, spitting, choking, penetrative sex, overstimulation, dirty talk, oral sex (male receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, creampie, female masturbation, mention of sex toys    

Word count: 3k

--------------

You were laying on your couch mindlessly browsing Amazon to see what you could spend your money on now. You had a bad habit of browsing through every category when you were bored. Since you were on there though you decided to take a peek at any new sex toys they had.

You scrolled down the page filled with vibrators, dildos and other assortments of toys they were newly selling. As you scrolled you found yourself thinking of Spencer. Usually your companion on boring nights, but tonight he warned you not to bother him. He told you he was going to be busy with going through case files since he was a bit behind.

You went over to your text messages to see if he had messaged you anything after you told him you wouldn’t bother him. He hadn’t. You looked at the time and saw it was 11:40 p.m. You opened the text message you were having with Spencer. You were curious if he was still working or if he had time to acknowledge your existence. You asked him how working on the files were going and then went back to Amazon.

You continued to scroll through the sex toys as you waited for him to text back. The more you looked at the dildos on the page the more you wished Spencer was over. You two had seen each other more than usual in the past month, but it never seemed as if there was time to have sex. He had a lot of work to do outside of already working ridiculous hours. You guessed that was the downside of not going on cases frequently. You were grateful he was around to go out and hang out with, but you missed him holding you down and fucking you mindless.

You checked to see if you missed a text from him. He hadn’t texted you back. You sighed and decided to message him again. You asked him if he was busy still and waited to see if he would respond. You waited for two minutes, but didn’t receive anything back. You guessed he was still busy. You found it astonishing that even a genius like him could take so long to do these case files. He was probably flooded by them.

You sighed as you locked your phone and laid it on your chest. You closed your eyes to rest them from staring at your screen light. Your mind started to wander to the last time you and Spencer had sex. He had you bent over your couch begging him to fuck you harder and harder. He had to cover your mouth at one point because you were being so loud that your neighbours were pounding on your wall. Just the thought of his dick pounding in you got you wet.

You opened your eyes and picked back up your phone. If he wasn’t going to text you maybe he’d answer a call from you. You just wanted to hear his voice if that was the only thing he could give you. You dialed his number and put your phone against your ear as you eagerly anticipated his voice. A few rings went by before you heard him answer.

“Yes, Y/N?” He asked.

He sounded slightly annoyed, but his deep, bothered tone made your heart speed up. Hearing his tone directly in your ear was such a sweet sound. You wanted to keep him on the line as long as possible.

“You didn’t answer my text messages, so I just wanted to know if you were alright,” you said.

“I’m fine. I told you I’d be busy, so I wouldn’t be able to talk,” he said.

“I know, I know, but you could have at least texted me back saying you were still busy. Had me out here wondering things,” you said.

“Wondering things?” He questioned.

“Yeah.”

“Like?”

“I don’t know like you coming over.”

“Y/N, you know I can’t tonight.”

“Just for a little. I know you don’t go to bed early anyway. I’d love to see you.”

“Tomorrow.”

“Babe, please. I want to see you tonight. I need to see you tonight.”

There was a pause on his end. His silence was killing you, but he didn’t leave you hanging for long. He let out a long sigh. He paused again before finally saying something again.

“You sound desperate. What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong is that I want to be your little whore tonight and you’re not letting me do that for you.”

He paused again. These pauses were indicating to you that he was taking your words into consideration. You knew how much he loved when you acted like his little whore. Doing anything he asked, letting him treat you however he wanted and enjoying every bit of it.

“I don’t know. I’m already behind with-”

“Don’t you want to fuck me?”

He paused.

“Well?”

“Yes.”

“Then come over and you can fuck me however you want.”

He paused again. You sat up as you waited for his response. You could hardly maintain your cool as you licked your lips in excitement. He finally let out a long, draining sigh.

“I’ll be there a bit after midnight. You know how much I hate when you sound overly desperate.”

“You’re coming here regardless though, are you not?”

“Only to help your desperate nature.”

You giggled. “Can’t wait to see you too. I’ll make sure I’m ready for you.”

“You better. See you soon.”

Without another word exchanged, he hung up. You hopped off the couch and let out a thrill fuelled shriek. You ran to your room and went straight to your drawer. You grabbed your favourite matching bra and underwear set before heading to the washroom.

You turned on your shower to let it warm up. You stripped your clothes off and looked at yourself in the mirror. You touched your breasts and then slowly ran your hands down your sides. You couldn’t contain the feeling of ecstasy you were experiencing throughout your whole being. The thought of Spencer was enough to get you feeling like an animal.

You hopped into the shower. You let the water flow over your body as you closed your eyes. The warmth of the water was refreshing. Before you opened your eyes and begin your shower, you let your hand wander down to your clit. You started to circle it as you thought of Spencer watching you do it with concentrated eyes. You stuck two of your fingers inside of you as you continued to recount countless times Spencer had you in his grip and had his way with you.

You pumped your fingers in and out of you at a rapid pace. You started moaning louder and louder. Your thoughts alone carried you to your orgasm as you let out a high pitched moan. You pulled your fingers out and let the water clean them of your juices.

After you were done showering, you put your favourite lotion on and your favourite deodorant. You then put on the bra and underwear combo. You looked at yourself in the mirror. You played around with your hair to see how sexy you could make it. Not that it mattered anyway, but you wanted to look as presentable as possible for the first few minutes of his arrival.

You went into your room and went over to your dresser. You picked out your favourite perfume and gave yourself a few sprits of it on your chest. You loved to doll yourself up before getting the shit fucked out of you because you knew how much Spencer loved making you look disheveled. He loved seeing you go from near perfect to his perfect little whore.

You heard a few knocks at your door. You felt chills crawl down your spine as you strolled over to your door. You looked through the peephole and saw Spencer standing there waiting for you to let him in. You smiled and opened the door enough to let him in.

“Welcome,” you said.

He smiled at you as he walked in. You immediately closed the door and leaned your back against it with your hands placed behind your back. You stared at him as you bit your lip as he stood there all cool and collected. You knew this was the quiet before the storm.

He looked over at you. He beckoned you with a movement of his fingers to come close to him. You slowly walked up to him. You reached out your hands and pressed them against his chest. You looked lustfully into his eyes as he continued to stare intently at you.

“I’ve waited so patiently for you to fuck me, baby,” you said.

He grabbed your hands off of your chest. He held them tightly and close to his lips. He kissed your hands as he continued to look you in your eyes. You couldn’t break eye contact with him. It was as if he was looking into you.

“No, you weren’t. You’re too calm now. Did you masturbate before I came?” He asked.

“No,” you lied.

In one swift motion, he let go of your hands and took his right hand to grab your neck firmly. You let out a gasp as he pulled your face close to him. Just by him doing that you were back to feeling your juices in-between your legs.

“You’re such a lying little whore. Did I teach you to lie to me?” He asked.

“No,” you squeaked.

“Then why did you lie?” He asked.

“I don’t know,” you said.

“On your knees,” he demanded.

You dropped to your knees as he let go of your neck. You already knew the drill, so you opened your mouth wide and waited. He undid his pants and pulled them down along with his underwear. The sight of his dick got you revved up and ready to start the night ahead.

He grabbed a handful of your hair and pushed your head forward, so your mouth could swallow him whole. You choked on his dick as it reached the back of your throat. He kept it there for a while as he listened to you choke on his cock. He pulled you off of him and watched as a string of spit connected your mouth to his dick.

“What happens when you lie to me?” He asked.

“I choke on your dick,” you said.

He responded by shoving your mouth back on his dick. You gagged on it as you felt tears sting your eyes. Saliva dripped from the side of your mouth and went down your chin all the way to your breasts. He soon rocked his hips back and forth so he could fuck your mouth.

“You think you’re smart enough to outwit me? Let this be a reminder of your place as my little whore,” he said.

You moaned around his cock in agreement. You reached your hands towards his thighs for some stability. He pulled you off of his cock and slapped you before grabbing your chin, so you could face him.

“Hands behind your back, whore,” he demanded.

You did as he said and held your hands behind your back. You opened back up your mouth for him and he gladly went back to fucking your mouth. As he kept hitting the back of your throat, you could feel the tears stream down your eyes and it mixed with the saliva dripping down the side of your mouth.

He pulled your head off of him and held your head back, so you could look up at him. He looked at the tears running down your face. He then looked at your saliva running down your chin and running onto your breasts.

“Tell me what you think you look like right now,” he said.

“Like a disgusting whore,” you responded.

“You do,” he said.

He let go of your hair and grabbed your chin. He leaned down and gave you a hot and heavy kiss with his tongue, not shying away from tackling yours. He parted his lips from yours. He didn’t move his face far away from yours though. He squeezed your jaw, so you could keep your mouth open. A stream of his spit went into your mouth and you gladly let it fall on your tongue before swallowing.

“But you’re my disgusting whore. Tell me, what else were you doing before I came and tell me the truth,” he said.

“I was looking at sex toys,” you confessed.

“That’s how desperate you were? You were going to order sex toys instead of waiting for me to satisfy you?” He asked.

“I promise I wasn’t going to buy anything, baby. You’re the only thing that can satisfy me,” you said.

“Is that so?” He asked.

“Yes, I’m only for you. I’m only happy when you fuck me. My little whore pussy is only for you, I swear,” you said.

“Get up,” he demanded.

You shot up from your kneeling position and he immediately pushed you backward until your back hit the wall. He wrapped his big hand around your neck as his other hand went down to your clit and started to circle it. You let out a squeaky moan as he looked at your desperate expression.

“Tell me what you masturbated to,” he demanded.

“I-I…you,” you moaned.

He started to circle your clit faster. “What did the little whore squeak?”

“You,” you shrieked.

“And what about me?”

“I was thinking…a-about how…you f-f-fuck me.”

He slipped two of his long fingers in you. You let out a loud moan as he started to rapidly pump in and out of you. The way he looked at you with desire in his eyes made you soaking wet.

“How do I fuck you?”

“Like a whore. Like the fucking whore I am.”

“What makes you a fucking whore?”

“Because I love getting stuffed with dick. I do anything to get fucked.”

“What makes you my little whore?”

“I love being fucked by you. I do anything you want to just be close to your dick.”

He attacked you with another aggressive kiss as he continued his pace with his fingers in you. You could feel a tingling sensation running through you again. You knew he wasn’t going to stop though. He wanted to be the one to make you cum this time. You were glad to make him be the one to make you cum this time.

He pulled his fingers out prematurely. You let out an unsatisfied groan as he parted his lips from yours. He heard you and that came with repercussions. He gave you another slap on your cheek with the hand he just pulled out of you.

“Keep complaining and I won’t fuck you at all,” he said as he licked off your juices from his fingers.

“I’m sorry, I won’t do it again,” you said.

“You’re lucky I want to fuck the shit out of you. Take off your underwear and bra,” he said as he let go of your neck.

You unhooked your bra and then pulled down your underwear. He grabbed your waist and pulled you in for another quick heavy kiss before leading you over to your kitchen table. You felt your blood pumping through your veins. You could tell you were about to get fucked hard. Whenever it wasn’t in the bedroom it was a sex act of pure, heavy lustful desire.

He grabbed you by your hair and forced your head down on the table. The rest of your torso fell onto the table as he positioned himself behind you. He slapped your butt cheek.

“Open your legs,” he said.

You spread your legs open and felt his dick ram inside of you. You let out a shriek as he continued to pound into you with such a great force you swear the table was moving with every thrust. He lifted your head up from the table, so your neck was bent back. It was bent far enough back so he could look at you desperately letting out your wild shrieks.

“This is how a whore gets fucked,” he said.

“I deserve it. I’ve been such a bad whore,” you said.

You felt his free hand go back to your clit. He rubbed circles around it and watched as you could barely form anything coherent to say. He smirked down at you.

“You can redeem yourself by cumming on the dick you love so much,” he said.

He didn’t even have to circle your clit for long. The look in his eyes mixed with the already lingering feeling of an orgasm from not too long ago sent you to your limit. You let out a scream as he continued to pound into you as you let your orgasm take over your body.

“That’s a good whore. Do you want my cum in you or on you?” He asked

“I-In…” Was all you could muster up to say.

“I knew a whore like you would want all my cum in you.”

“I-I…I love…love your cum.”

He smiled as he leaned down and gave you a sloppy kiss. “I know, you usually want to swallow it.”

“I…I want it…I want it to drip…out of my…”

“Shh, I know,” he said.

He planted a few kisses on your neck as he began to pound into you harder. You were screaming at that point from the feeling of his dick destroying you. Your nails were scratching the table as you tried to keep your balance. He let out a loud moan and you could feel his cum release into you.

He let go of your hair and pulled out of you. You felt his cum dripping out of you and you knew he was watching it drip out of you from behind. He then grabbed your arm to turn you around, so you could face him.

He smiled at you. “Is this what you so desperately wanted? This couldn’t wait until tomorrow?”

You gave him an exhausted smile. “I wanted to be your little whore tonight.”

He leaned down and kissed you. “You were a very good little whore tonight.”

“Does that mean a round two is up for discussion?” You asked.

He chuckled. “How about we get cleaned up and we cuddle instead?”

“Can I be your little cuddle whore at least?”

“Of course.”

—–

MASTERLIST

[sarahjtv]

BNHA Chapter 318 Quick Spoiler Analysis: Lost and Found

Ok, I think I need a few days to process everything that’s happened during this chapter and I might make a longer analysis for this chapter later, but holy shit when I tell you I ascended, I ASCENDED!  That page of Deku thinking about his classmates with a genuinely big smile on Shoto’s face and the last pages of Bakugo straight-up watered my crops, cleared my skin, expended my lifespan, and sent my soul into the great unknown for a bit.  I screamed happy sounds last night.  With that in mind, some very quick thoughts today:

Hooray for overseas Pro Heroes coming over to help Japan!  This means that Deku and Co. will have more allies on their side and Deku doesn’t have to take care of everything.  I hope and pray he listens to Endeavor and get some freaking sleep.

I’ve heard people mention that Endeavor’s been treating Deku like an adopted son lately and I can see it.  It’s almost like he’s trying to become the good father he wasn’t with his own children.  Like he’s making it up with Deku this time as the son figure.  I kinda like it actually.  It’s good character growth for Endeavor.

The panel of the OFA Holders trying to get Deku to rest is a parallel to the chapter where we go into Shigaraki’s psyche and we see his family trying to grab him and stop him too.  Of course, both Deku and Shigaraki ignore the spirits and just move on with Shigaraki moving towards AFO and Deku moving onto the next villain to beat.  I really like it when Horikoshi parallels these two characters and their symbolism.  I actually just like it in general when it’s done right.

It’s clear that the OFA Holders feel like that maybe they pushed Deku too far with their words and motivations.  But, this is ultimately what Deku wants.  For better or worse, he chose the path of a hero and he’s bent on getting to the finish line.  Though it’s interesting that the 2nd Holder is the only one who thinks that Deku pushing himself so hard is the right thing to do.  I don’t think the 2nd Holder is being malicious in saying this.  I think there’s something to his character and backstory that molded his reasonings.  I mean, Deku really is the only one who can do this, but he does need help.  If Deku can get some help then he can finally rest and fight properly instead of exhausting himself to death.

God, it’s upsetting to see Deku actually being feared by people despite saving them.  Just the way Deku looks alone is scary enough.  The kid doesn’t remotely look like a hero anymore.  He’s not the hero who’s presence can put everyone at ease right now.  Deku’s strayed so far away from his original origins.  The main thing staying there is his want to save people.

And as all these burdens are on his shoulders, the most important thought in his head are his classmate’s smiles.  Everyone is smiling from Ochaco to Shoto who’s pure, rare smile will remain in my head rent free for the rest of eternity 💙.  Deku wants a world where there’s peace and smiles even if he has to suffer for that.  Throughout everything, he’s never forgotten about his friends and their happiness.  I really do love this kid, guys.

As Deku’s facing this other assassin, Dictator (who’s Quirk is similar to Shinso’s except the people he’s controlling are conscious), Deku looks so, so tired.  He’s thinking of ways to save all these controlled civilians while being attacked by them, but he’s just standing there exhaustingly.  There’s a small panel of his eye and it looks so tired.  I know I keep saying that, but he is.  There’s a small flicker of light in his eye too.  I looks to me like it’s going to go out at any moment really.  Deku needs to get a proper meal and sleep before he collapses in on himself.

AND NOW WE GET TO KATSUKI BAKUGO!!!  HOLY SHIT WE HAVEN’T SEEN THIS DUDE IN SINCE LATE LAST YEAR AND HE’S BACK AND HE’S SO BEAUTIFUL 😭💥🧡  The internet’s still going nuts about him I can tell.  He blasts Dictator with an AP Shot and Deku sees him with some life back in his eyes.  Bakugo then pulls out his phone and tells someone “Guys, I found him”!  Which means that Bakugo wasn’t the only one searching for Deku!!!  Please tell me who else joined him, Horikoshi!  I’m betting on Shoto, Ochaco, and maybe Iida, Momo, and Kirishima since they helped Deku rescue Bakugo back in Kamino (which is where Bakugo actually found Deku ironically enough; right in Ground Zero where the All Might statue is).  

Also, the 2nd Holder mentioned before “But if there is someone who could make Midoriya Izuku whole at the moment, that would be…” and then we go right into the big Bakugo panel!  BKDK’s rise 🧡💚!!!  But seriously, this is amazing.  These two really do complete each other not just as rivals, but as friends.  And it’s great how this goes to show how much Bakugo’s grown from the beginning.  This kid who wanted absolutely nothing to do with Deku at the beginning became one of the people actively looking for him and even found Deku first.  Bakugo’s character development truly is one of the best in the series.  

And this would be a great time for Bakugo and Deku to finally have that talk they’ve been needing to have for a long, long time now.  I almost hope that the other kids don’t reunite with Deku next chapter because I really want that talk if they didn’t have it back at Central Hospital.  A glimpse of the other kids would be good and I’d love to see Shoto again, but I NEED THAT ANGSTY TALK!  I wonder if we’re going to have a roll reversal here too: Bakugo lends out a helping hand towards Deku and asks him to rest, but Deku ignores Bakugo’s hand and turns away and leaves again instead.  That would absolutely kill me.  Just as much as the All Might angst we got last week.  If that happens then the turns really will have tabled.  I will cry again for a week straight.  I would still thank Horikoshi for his masterful storytelling though.  I would also cry if Deku does take Bakugo’s hand though.  God, there are so many feels to these two characters it’s wonderful.  I need Chapter 319 like yesterday.

But unfortunately, we won’t get that for a while.  Horikoshi is taking a break next week and so is the anime on July 3rd I think.  So, we’re going to have a dry spell for a week straight my MHA friends.  I’m honestly ok with this though.  For me, the new OP and ED and Horikoshi sketch will tide me over with their bangers (I hope) and Horikoshi needs as many breaks as he can get.  He’s been drawing and writing pure 🔥 this arc and I want him to get some much deserved rest.  Especially after Berserk’s Kentaro Miura’s passing and JJK’s Gege Akutami taking his month long break.  Hey, Jump?  Please give your mangaka better schedules.  I hate seeing them so exhausted.  Anyway, enjoy your break, King 👑!     

Me reading Horikoshi’s last few arcs:          

[lilyvines]

v...favorite Moments from Final Waltz? Mine is the Mellohi record scratch and the I'm Proud line and the Please Don't Go line and the You Should Have Paid Me More line and the-

YES ALL OF THOSE BUT ALSO IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:

- the whole fight scene between clingyduo vs dream. I am such a sucker for cool fight scenes, especially fantasy ones, ESPECIALLY animated and it scratched an itch in my brain

- especially with all the enderpearl mechanics and the cool part with 3 pics of them in different cut parts, if you know what I mean (there’s a better word for it I just can’t think of it)

- that one scene where they’re climbing up the mountain and it cuts to the sunset. like idk i just thought that was super cool

- the whole green strings thing with the overlays was just so neat and looked incredible I was like :0

- and obviously the titular ‘you should’ve paid me more line’ but also that shot of everyone who came to join them in the fight was INCREDIBLE i love that kinda thing

- also the whole Tommy killing dream moment is smth that doesn’t get depicted in fanart enough (which is fanartists choice ofc ^-^ but still I’ve always wanted to see it) and it just looked so cool. Tommy stepped on dreams mask and I was like ‘!!!’

- also right after that when Dream talks abt the revive book and the music slows down and u can just hear Tommy’s ‘EH????’ it made me giggle a bit

- also all of the cute moments. even tho it’s depicting a super heavy Lore Event i loved the scene with clingyduo on the bench as tubbo goes ‘Dream SMP season 3 baybee!’ or smth it just made me smile

- this is more of an overall tone thing but I loved how we could FEEL the vibes that clingyduo felt. at first it’s ‘we’re going on an adventure! we’re gonna win!’ And then its ‘epic battle!! maybe we are winning?!’ And then tubbo gets cornered and it’s ‘oh shit oh shit oh shit’ and then Dream goes on his spiel and it’s ‘OH SHIT OH SHIT’ and then punz n co come through the portal and it’s like ‘AYEEEE’

- i loved the Wilbur + tommy bit but also the way the screen lightened was so goddamn cool

- just the lighting in general was INCREDIBLE?? everything looked so COOL and she managed to make everything look spooky and beautiful and dark while still being easy to see and process

and quick other kinda related note: the music!! was so!! good!! it’s so cool how they like marketed the song around her if that makes sense. 2WEI delivers bangers everytime

[karlnapity]

it’s not worth it, achilles.

(tws: manipulation, emotional & slight physical abuse, panic attacks, one very vague reference to suicidal ideation, agoraphobia)

eret is a watcher.

they’ve never wanted to be at the center of the conflict. content with being off to the side, content with taking what’s given to them.

(but are they?)

they care for wilbur, for tommy, for tubbo, for fundy, for all of them. that isn’t a question. wilbur had welcomed them into his nation with open, welcoming arms, and they accepted graciously and without hesitation.

they can see the gears turning in dream’s head, and they can only see those gears growing sharp with time. it’s not much of a question.

and maybe that has something to do with it, but at the end of the day they can’t quite say what made them accept dream’s invitation to chat.

(it was greed, it was the promise of power, it was cowardice and ambition and desperation all wrapped in a disgusting little bundle that rested in their chest, and maybe still does.)

in any case, they find themselves face to face with the man who should be their worst enemy right now.

they hold themselves poised as they can, and for some reason it makes dream huff what must be a laugh. he settles on a block, gesturing for eret to do the same. they refuse.

“so i have a proposition,” dream starts, adjusting his mask to more thoroughly cover his face. he pauses, and eret raises an eyebrow, waves for him to continue.

“we’re looking for a king to rule the smp,” he says, leaning forward.

“i thought you had george for that,” they say. what is this?

“not for now. later, sure, but i’m not sure he’s ready.” that makes eret frown. it’s an odd way to refer to one’s right-hand man, but at the end of the day it’s not their business.

“you’re asking me to be king?” they ask, hesitant.

“i’m not asking,” dream responds, and something in his tone makes them freeze. they take a step back, almost unwittingly.

“i want you to be king, eret. i think you’d do a banger job,” dream says, standing. as he stalks closer, they clench their fists, silently beg themselves not to show their discomfort.

he stops only a few inches away, crosses his arms far too casually for the situation.

“this is how it’s going to go,” he commands, and suddenly eret is far, far too aware of how this man has commanded men, won wars.

whatever he says… they can’t refuse.

> contrary to what everyone says, they don’t want to be a traitor, but if everyone’s going to think they’re the villain they might as well make it sound good.

the final control room goes perfectly. as they find themselves next to dream on the battlefield, dream’s cold, commanding hand leaving a bruise on their shoulder where he holds it proudly, they don’t feel like much a king, and they feel an awful lot like a slimy traitor.

> it’s not a coronation as much as a condemnation. dream places the crown on their head, and they can’t help but flinch away.

they think they hear sapnap stifle a chuckle, and every nerve in their body constricts in barely contained rage.

dream uses his hand to force eret’s chin up, and they refuse to meet his eyes until he squeezes enough to hurt. he nods, patronizingly, lets go and brushes invisible dust off their shoulders.

they pray for it to be over.   > being a king has always been a figurehead. they hold no power.

dream doesn’t accept anything less than perfect. not in their posture, not in their robes, not in their voice and actions. they do what he says, and they don’t what he doesn’t.

the others hate them, still, and they can’t blame them in the slightest. they’ve barely seen them, not since the final control room, and they can only hope they’ve pulled themselves together, since.

they’re so proud of tommy. but they can’t say that, not hardly, not when dream’s pacing back and forth in the meeting room.

they stand at the door like a guard, only really there as a pretty decoration, and they’re only forced to listen while dream and the others concoct plan after plan to kill the others.

they’re so tired. > they’re more of a target than anything. dream promised them immunity, and they knew it was a lie then; it’s only brought the opposite.

they’re a figure for everyone’s hatred. dream is still acting reasonable in the public eye, for now, and eret is the crazy one. the one who traded their country for kingship, for power that doesn’t exist.

dream doesn’t let them cry, not when he can see it. they’re more thankful for their glasses than ever.

they’ve gotten real good at hiding flinching, too. > dream doesn’t starten to loosen his hold at all until the election. they don’t think he means to, but with other playthings in the form of a president and an exiled man, he doesn’t have as much time to fuck with them.

but he makes one thing very clear:

“don’t leave the castle without my permission, got it?”

they’ve got it. > fundy is the first to visit, and when the first signs of orange appear at the end of the throne room, they almost weep in relief, almost trip on the edge of their cloak before dream’s words snap them back to their senses, telling them not to act undignified. they still can’t help the giddy smile on their face, and fundy looks them hard in the eye before an awkward “hi.”

they return it quietly. > it’s a hard thing, walking the line between trying to apologize and trying not to reveal anything.

(because they can’t tell the others. they can’t.)

they’re pretty sure fundy suspects something, but they can’t say anything.

not even when they flinch whenever someone raises their voice or moves too fast, or how they’re so much quieter than before, or how they staunchly, staunchly refuse to leave the castle unless it’s an event they’ve been invited to.

dream is playing them like a fucking fiddle, and they can’t do anything about it. > niki is the first person they say anything to.

they’re on a parapet, looking out at the stars, and niki rests her head on their shoulder. they smile down at her. they’ve removed their glasses, and the light from their eyes bathes her in gentle light.

“i’m worried for you,” she says, hooking her arm in theirs. they start back a bit.

“what do you mean?” they ask, trying and failing to reclaim the royal disposition they fall back to in situations like this.

“you’re not happy as king,” she says, moving to fully look them in the face.

(they’re uncomfortable. what do they say? what would dream want them to say? what’s safe?)

“i’m fine,” they say. “it’s just stressful, is all.”

she scoffs. “with what work? eret, it’s obvious you’re not in charge. just please, tell me what’s going on. is it dream?”

they feel the urge to lower their voice like he’s listening in, as silly as it is.

(is he?)

their hands are shaking, and they clasp them to hide it. “i can't tell you anything."

and they don’t say anything more, because dream is there, guiding niki out of the castle, and they don’t say anything to stop it. > they hate him. they hate him, they hate him, they hate him, they hate him, and they don’t say anything about it.

they let dream toy with the idea of replacing them with george, they let him threaten their life, they let him say everything he wants to him, and they take it with grace like they know he wants them to do.

they stand in the center of the room as he paces, feeling so utterly exposed. their crown feels heavy, their robes feel like they’re pulling them to the floor, but they stand composed even as they feel like they might lose a life any moment.

they clench their fists to hide how they’re shaking like a leaf, and it does nothing.

he lunges forward, grasps their chin, and they know now to make eye contact immediately. their eyes reflect off his mask.

he tilts their head, inspecting something, and they don’t flinch even as they know he’ll leave bruises on their cheekbones. he pushes them back, and they try not to stumble.

“you’re an embarrassment,” is all he says. “and if you speak to any of them tomorrow, if you even think of leaving the throne room, i’ll kill you right then and there.”

and they don’t doubt it for a second. > fundy tries to get their attention, and as his ears droop and he spits retorts as he leaves and they pretend to continue reading the book and shift uncomfortably on the throne, they feel like crying. dream is just taunting them. > the next day, it’s niki. she stares them down, tells them not to bend this low, and she leaves. they do cry, then, and dream tells them to stop. and they do. > then it’s sapnap, and they don’t know whether they can talk to him as he tells them about his day. their hands curl on their book, and they don’t know where dream is, and they don’t know if sapnap is safe, and everything feels like too much and sapnap is asking them if they’re paying attention, and then they’re ripping the book with their grip and they’re crying and sapnap is asking them if they’re ok and they still don’t know whether he’s safe and they can’t breathe, and they’re on the floor and sapnap is still asking them if they’re ok and they don’t know.

and dream is there, and for once his hold is soft and he strokes their hair and tells them it’s ok, and of course of sapnap is safe, you’re being silly, and how about we call it a day, and they can’t even help but nod in agreement. > dream tells them to take the day off, and they know it’s not kindness, because as they give up on the latch of the door and wonder whether they can make it out of the window, they see a few people congregating near the castle. they can’t quite make out their names, their faces, or even their voices, but they can tell anger when they hear it. something is happening. > and in front of everyone, the next day, as dream stares her down, niki asks them to join her. they lower their head, stare at their lap as dream chuckles. > but they do. dream tells them he’ll kill them. he tells them he’ll kill niki, kill fundy, kill tommy, kill everyone, but it doesn’t matter. he won’t hurt anyone but them, at least not for now, and they don’t fucking care.

let him do as he pleases, they won’t go down easy. anything is better than this.

they rip the crown off their head, throw it down at dream’s feet, and they leave the castle for the first time in months. > niki cheers when she sees them, and they grin, hug her, grab her and swing her around. it doesn’t matter that they’re both in armor, it doesn’t matter that they’re about to go to war against him, they’re there and they’re out and they’re with the people they love.

even if they don’t love them back. they don’t miss tommy’s glare.

(they deserve it.) > they pity george.

they offer their comfort. they don’t get a response.

(not for months, anyways.)   > they retake their mantle, and it’s only a bit easier than before. dream’s control has loosened, but it’s still there, still a looming sense of fear that makes it hard for them to take a full breath.

their friends aren’t there much anymore. fundy is lost in grief, and niki’s doing… whatever she’s doing.

but a new member approaches them oohs and aahs at their castle but approaches them like a person in a way that makes them want to weep.

her name is puffy, and they love her already. > it’s so hard to leave the castle. they still imagine dream popping out from somewhere, telling them to get back inside, and more often than not they don’t make it out of the door. they're loitering in the doorway, fidgeting with their hands when they see puffy. she waves at them, grinning, and they give her a shaky smile back.

“what’s up?” she asks. their chest tightens.

“um. not sure yet,” is all they can muster, and god, dream wouldn’t like that, but it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t fucking matter anymore.

she nods. “cool.”

they stand in silence for a few seconds, and then she extends a hand and says, “i’m on a walk. wanna join me?”

it’s clear what she’s doing, and they grin at her kindness. the looming feeling in their chest dissipates, just a little. they take her hand, and soon enough they’re out from under the shadow of the castle, and they’re in the sunlight.

and it's hard, their hands still shake and they get the urge to run back where it's safe even when it's not, but she distracts them every time their eyes stray and when they sit down in the middle of the prime path and hide their face in their hands and scrub tears a voice tells them they shouldn't be shedding in the first place she sits with them and makes them laugh. > “maybe being king can be something good,” puffy tells them one night.

“you think?” they ask, huffing a laugh. “i’m not sure.”

“yeah,” she says, elbowing them playfully. “you’re in a special position. maybe you can use your influence to help everyone.”

“i don’t have influence,” they start, but she interrupts.

“i know, maybe politically, you don’t. but people respect you. you can use that.”

it’s hard to imagine anyone respecting them, after their cowardice. but as they lean against puffy and stare at the crater, they suppose someone needs to try around here. and they will.

(they push down the voice that says it’s retribution.)

[nbrook29]

99 🖤🖤

Hello there! You’re officially my last dialogue prompt 🤩 I’m sorry this took so long, anon, I hope you’re gonna like it at least a little 🤓

I don’t take prompts for this challenge anymore. Just wanted to put that out there 😇 There are so many amazing ones on that list, but as of now I have 3 WIPs and one additional one in the works and I’d like to finish them before wtfock ends 😅

Anywho, here you go!

99. “I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”

* * *

Robbe is going to kill Moyo. 

In fact, he's going to kill all three of his so-called friends because none of them protested when Moyo, tipsy and on his way to drunk, announced that this party sucked and was in dire need of some spice. 

He wishes he had listened to his past self and stayed home just like he had originally planned. It was supposed to be a quiet night in, editing videos or maybe spent in bed rewatching Romeo and Juliet in peace with no broers around to mock his movie choice while stuffing his face with onion chips and pretending the movie does not make him emotional, no sir. The wetness in his eyes must be sweat, not tears.

Then, after the movie would have ended, his sulking levels high, it would be time for his favorite activity of recent - daydreaming about reality in which he actually had the fucking guts to make a proper move instead of turning red everytime a certain someone was in his close proximity; smiling at him with that perfect sweet lovely smile that turned his already gorgeous features so much more beautiful that Robbe could weep.

And doesn’t that sound like a magnificent evening?

It may sound kinda lame, Robbe is a man enough to admit that, but the prospect of spending the night watching his friends salivating over girls they can’t get being the alternative wouldn't be particularly alluring to anyone, he guesses. Especially since he never partakes in that salivating part himself, instead chugging one beer after another and playing his designated role of a wallflower. 

Story of his life.

The whole thing just plain sucks, because it’s not like his friends aren’t well aware of the fact that Robbe’s interests lie elsewhere and that he’s usually bored out of his mind at those parties. But when there’s at least a semi-attractive girl around them they don’t care about anything else but getting her number and Robbe’s not exactly their priority then. In fact, he could well enough not be there at all and it wouldn’t make much difference. It happens every time they drag him along to those parties and every time he just stands there, rolling his eyes on their embarrassing attempts of flirting. 

Not like he’s the master of flirting himself, but even he’s not capable of stooping as low as they usually do.

This time, he reluctantly agreed to come to this one, against his better judgement, after Jens bugged him about it for their entire biology class, trying to convince him it was going to be more of a small gathering rather than a party. And frankly speaking, he did that just to make him shut up so mrs Jansen stopped glaring at him. Like he was the one running his mouth.

Once Robbe said the magic words “I’ll be there” there was no way of getting out of it. Still, his plan was to come by for an hour or two to get the broers of his back, drink a few beers, talk to Jana maybe, and then quietly leave when everyone would be too drunk and too busy tonguing at each other's tonsils to notice he's gone. 

But to his surprise, the party turned out not to be the typical banger they usually attended. It wasn’t even that bad and he was kinda having fun since he wasn't forced to play the guys' sidekick-gay-friend this time around and instead was dragged by Zoe to the kitchen to drink shots with her, Jana and Luca right after he arrived.

However, parties are not really his scene in general so when it started getting really late he finished his last Buttery Nipple shot composed by Luca (don’t ask) and was just about to make an apologetic face at the girls and say his goodbyes. 

But then Noor and Brit arrived. 

With him.

And Robbe almost swallowed his tongue.

Nobody should have the right to look this good but there he was, laughing with Milan in the hall while taking his signature leather jacket off, running a hand through his smooth like silk hair (Robbe's convinced it's indeed very silky) to ruffle it a little like it ever needed any styling, and in general looking like he had just walked out of Robbe's dream straight into Milan's apartment. 

Sander Driesen.

The reason for Robbe’s cheeks being permanently stained pink as of late.

They met at one of those after school clubs led by Amber several weeks ago that Robbe came to only because he agreed (after pretty much being blackmailed into it) to play Aaron’s wingman in winning Amber’s heart. 

He was gone as soon as those green eyes met his and the boy in front of him, wearing a black Bowie t-shirt and a leather jacket, shook his hand while smiling a little unsurely but still friendly, never breaking their eye contact as he introduced himself in a honey-like voice that penetrated every cell of his body, knees buckling a little, heart stuttering, the whole shebang.

He’s still thanking god he managed to hold back the whimper that was about to get out when he was saying his own name back.

Needless to say, the meeting became much more bearable after that.

Even having to witness Aaron’s cringeworthy attempts of gaining Amber’s attention weren’t that bad anymore. Not when they made Sander chuckle under his breath and catch his eye over Amber’s shoulder, winking at Robbe with a mischief dancing in his eyes as he bit his lip to keep his own laugh at bay. 

And then, Amber came up with some stupid “love excercise” or whatever the fuck she called it and made them all hold hands in a circle. She claimed it released stress and spread positivity or some other bullshit, but Robbe was convinced it was just a ploy she came up with to hold the school’s number one fuckboy Senne’s hand (who, if Robbe had to guess, also wasn’t there out of his own free will). 

Robbe wasn’t a very touchy-feely person, especially with people he had no business of touching in the first place so the whole thing was beyond painful. Thankfully, Jana came to his rescue, snatching his right hand as they exchanged smirks over Amber’s lofty speech about positive energy filling their bodies.

But then someone else gently took his other hand and when he went to inspect who it was, annoyance already starting to creep in, his mouth went dry, eyes going up, up, up the person’s leather-clad arm before stopping on Sander’s face, looking far too entertained.

The boy took an overly deep breath, eyes closed and face feigning seriousness, breathing out loudly.

“Ahh, I can already feel that rush of energy,” Sander leaned in to whisper to him, a teasing tilt to his voice making Robbe giggled at his antics. 

“I guess Amber was right then.”

“No no, I don’t think it’s Amber’s techniques, I just think it’s because of you.”

Robbe just gaped at this shameless flirting, receiving another wink when caught blushing deep pink. Sander seemed unfazed though, totally chill, like saying lame lines and winking at boys was in his everyday repertoire. It definitely wasn’t like that for Robbe, and definitely not from boys as cute as Sander.

He should have probably rolled his eyes at him, called him cocky and full of himself. And yet.

There was something about Sander’s demeanor that screamed it was all a facade, and that underneath there was a huge dork that came out right after that guard was let down. Robbe couldn’t even be annoyed with the smug winking because it was adorned with such a cute smile that it called for a fond eye roll rather than scoffing.

Before he could form at least a half cool response, Amber started shushing all of them with a bossy face, glaring at every person that dared to make a sound. So with a rush of sudden boldness, Robbe just squeezed Sander’s hand and looked at him from under his lashes, biting his lip in an attempt at being coy (and cringing at himself internally) despite his body thrumming with nerves standing this close to Sander, and for some unknown reason it brought the desired effect. 

Sander kept smiling at him surreptitiously throughout the entire meeting, making him laugh with his playful faces at some of Amber’s more ridiculous statements, and it felt like they had an entire conversation even though they didn’t exchange one word during that half an hour.

When they were finally free to go home it was after 21, Robbe realized with a whine. After they all collected their things and were ready to leave, Sander turned around in the doorway, searching for Robbe’s eyes while ignoring the rest of their friends crowding against the door, and when Robbe glanced furtively into his direction his expression turned almost bashful as he said bye, Robin.

And then again with the winking.

Good god this boy.

And how cute it was he couldn’t actually wink? It looked more like a reinforced blinking, but he still looked cute doing it.

Once Robbe came back home that evening, thoughts occupied with bleached hair and the smell of leather jacket, he couldn’t stop himself from searching for Sander’s social media. In just one sitting he gathered a handful of information, finding out Sander was a year older and recently transferred to his school (which would explain how he had missed him in the corridors). He also had a photo with Amber down at the bottom of his profile and from the caption it seemed like they were cousins. 

Robbe’s fingers hovered over the ‘follow’ button, but he didn’t want to seem like a stalker so he just closed the app, throwing his phone on his bed in exasperation feeling sorry for himself and his inexperience in talking to boys.

The universe decided to be graceful for him for once in his life though and put Sander on his path again only 3 days later.

Like every Saturday afternoon Robbe was in the skate park with the broers, taking piss of one another’s skills and trying out new tricks while basking in the October sun that felt more like it was full on spring rather than the beginning of fall. He was in the middle of showing off some of his best tricks to the sounds of his friends hollering when he caught sight of bleached hair in his peripheral, almost falling straight on his ass. But luck was on his side and he avoided making a spectacle out of himself. 

Once he was safely on the ground, skateboard under his foot, he glanced in the direction of white hair one more time to see Sander lowering his vintage camera and whistling, making an impressed face and promptly causing Robbe to downcast his eyes bashfully.

“Hey.”

“Hey, Robin.” 

Robbe sighed. “It’s Robbe.”

“I know, but isn’t that a cute nickname?”

Robbe ducked his head, smiling a little to himself, cursing the heat rising in his cheeks. “Are you always this annoying?”

For a moment, Sander seemed to be taken aback, but then he must have noticed the teasing glint in Robbe’s eyes because he relaxed visibly, confidence back on his face.

Then, easily and offhandedly, he said, “No, just with very certain people.”

If Robbe had any doubts before about Sander taking immense pleasure out of teasing him, he didn’t anymore. He was flashed with another mischievous smile and then Sander nodded at the bowl.

“That was pretty awesome.”

“Thanks.” Robbe scratched at the back of his neck self-conciously, ignoring his friends’ intrigued faces and praying they didn’t say anything stupid. “To be honest, these aren’t even that difficult, anybody could do them...”

“Pff, I tried this skateboarding thing once and let me tell you, I was an absolute disaster so don’t sell yourself short.” Sander nudged at his shoulder with a knowing look, the contact sending a shiver through Robbe’s entire body. 

“So what are you doing here if you suck at it?” He sent him a toothy grin when Sander gaped at his brazen words, faux-scandalized. 

He then lifted his camera swiftly and took a photo of Robbe’s dumbfounded face.

“I’m only around this deadly thing to take artsy pictures of cute boys.”

Looking very proud of himself, Sander laughed at his indignant spluttering, refusing to show Robbe the photo at first, giving in a few seconds later under his killer pout (Sander’s words). 

“So, is this where you spend your afternoons?” he asked casually once they sat down at a nearby bench, Sander scrolling through his camera roll and showing him the photos.

Robbe nodded, watching Aaron from afar attempting the backside ollie and failing miserably. It pulled out a snort from Sander.

“Well, you’re definitely better at it than your friends.”

Elbowing him in the side as a sign of loyalty to his friends, he replied. “Jens is actually better than me.”

Sander sent him a curious look. “Is he your boyfriend?”

“What?! Eww, no! I have way better taste than that.” It’s not like he’d admit he had crushed on his best friend a year ago. So, hopefully, he sounded convincing.

Sander lifted his hands in surrender, laughing at his outburst. “Okay, okay, message received, only the cutest boys for you,” he paused, biting at his lip to hold his smirk. “Makes sense,” he muttered under his breath, but Robbe heard him anyway.

Later that day, he got a instagram notification that informed him that earthlingoddity was following him as of now and damn if that didn’t make Robbe’s heart beat faster.

earthlingoddity sent you a link

S: Considering today’s unfortunate incident, I made you a bowie playlist, need to teach the youngsters like you the real music 😎😏

The first message from Sander made him scoff, but he rolled his eyes at himself anyway when he remembered his conversation with him at the skatepark, asking about the shirt and prompting Sander to quiz him about David Bowie’s songs.

Robbe hid his face in his hands at the mere memory.

Space Cowboy.

How embarrassing. 

Sander tried so hard not to burst out laughing at Robbe’s confusion when his answer was met with a blank stare, bless him.

R: So you're one of those people?

S: What people?

R: Self-righteous hipsters 😜

S: Now now Robin

No need for names 😩

R: It's Robbe

R o b b e

S: Okay Robin ;)

R: 🙄

Unbelievable

S: So 

What's up? 🙃

They kept up at this casual texting for 2 recent weeks, getting to know each other, and Sander confirming that he does, in fact, have a soft side. Robbe also realized he was a much bolder person when no face to face interaction was required when he had more time before responding to Sander. Then there were the occasional “hellos” at school when they crossed paths in the halls, but so far their friendship, if he could even call it that, hadn’t evolved further.

In fact, this party was the first time Robbe had seen him in a week.

Their eyes met for a few short seconds and Robbe waved at him, immediately after wanting to bang his head at the table because who the fuck waves these days? 

Sander didn’t seem to mind this dorky display at all, beaming at him from across the hallway and not paying much attention to Milan who was talking his ear off. A second later, he was out of Robbe’s sight, dragged by Milan and the girls to the living room, leaving him staring longingly after him. 

Before Robbe got his shit together and on shaky legs went there to maybe squeeze out a few words to him, Moyo was already on his way of arranging people into a circle and producing a bottle to spin. 

What a bad fucking timing.

This was so not Robbe’s idea of fun so he started to surreptitiously backing off to the hall to slide out the door but Jana, the traitor, grabbed his arm and sat him next to her, seeming very excited about the game.

It’s not like he was the only one reluctant to play though. Sander’s face looked rather bemused too.

“Come oooon, Sander,” Noor groaned at him, pulling at his sleeve relentlessly to make him plop his butt on her left side. “You promised to leave that sulky slash lovesick face at home and have fun. This is fun!”

“I think we have a different definition of fun, darling,” he retorted, his gaze sweeping through the half-drunk faces, stopping at Robbe’s for a millisecond. It was so quick he thought he imagined the apprehensive look on his face, but then Sander did sit down, letting out a long-suffering sigh and promptly avoided his gaze throughout the game. Which was clearly an intentional effort because they sat exactly opposite each other.

To say Robbe was confused would be an understatement.

And that’s how he finds himself here, sitting in a circle amongst his friends and several strangers who keep hollering and shoving tongues in each other’s throats. He had one close call when the bottle spinned by a redhead girl almost pointed at him, making him hold his breath but then stopping on Moyo sitting on his other side, who was way more eager to fill the deed.

When it’s finally Sander’s turn to spin the bottle, Robbe's heart starts beating double time and he twists his fingers nervously. He realizes with dread that there is no good outcome of this situation; if it lands on any of his friends or any of those few people he only vaguely recognizes, he’s going to have to watch Sander play tonsil tennis with them and his stomach turns unpleasantly with something akin to jealousy at the mere thought. 

But if it lands on him?

Oh god.

The bottle is spinning already, Robbe having missed the moment Sander put it in motion, too busy wrangling with his thoughts about what he should do. The fact Sander has been avoiding his eyes ever since they started this stupid game makes him even more nervous about the whole thing. 

Then the bottle stops, pointing at him so accurately that it leaves no room for question.

And Sander’s face positively falls.

Sitting near him Jens and Moyo are giving him subtle thumbs up and not so subtle shit-eating grins with Aaron next to them clearly confused at their behavior all the while Sander looks like he’s in pain.

Eyes glued to the floor, body rigid, looking like he’d want to be anywhere but here.

People are staring at them, waiting for something to happen and Robbe feels nauseous.

And so humiliated. 

How could he misinterpret Sander’s behavior so much? And it’s not even that, not really. Does the idea of kissing him disgusts him that much he can’t even give him one stupid kiss to avoid putting Robbe on the spot?

From the corner of his eye he can see Noor elbowing Sander in the side and there’s an entire conversation happening between them without one word being uttered. 

Then, several things happen at once. The boys let go of any subtlety and start whooping and hollering like they want to force Sander to make some kind of move, there’s a loud whack coming from the kitchen where one of the couples went to continue their PDA so Jana and Zoe get up to check the damage and then Adi, who has been rummaging through the liquor cabinet for the last ten minutes, yells that he found a ten year old whiskey, making the broers scrambling off the floor to get their hands on it.

The rest of the people are still here with them though. Still staring. And Sander still seems to be rooted to the spot.

And Robbe has had enough. 

Ignoring Noor’s soft Robbe, he gets up and with a heavy heart almost runs to the door, putting his jacket on in a haste, frustration and shame cursing through his body as he runs down the stairs two step at a time, wanting to get outside as fast as he can.

The cold air washes over him once he reaches the entrance and he breaths in shakily, feeling his eyes welling up despite his hardest efforts not to cry.

It just hurts. It really hurts. And if he’s being honest with himself, the fact that there have been witnesses to his humiliation is a small part of the reason why he feels this way. It’s about the fact that it was Sander.

Sander. This boy who let him believe there may actually be someone interested in him. In that way. Sander, who flirted with him, complimented him, smiled at him, listened to him and sent him Bowie playlists.

Sander, who he felt more connected to recently than to any of his friends. 

He wipes at his eyes angrily, scoffing at the fact that this asshole was able to make him cry, when he hears rushed steps on the sidewalk behind him.

“Robbe!”

Walking faster, he tries to ignore the sound until there’s a hand on his shoulder stopping him in his tracks. He turns around ready to blow out in Sander’s face but the boy is faster.

“I’m so sorry for that,” he pants, voice tinted with desperation, apologies written across his face as his eyes flit all over Robbe’s like he’s trying to read his mind.

But Robbe only lets out a humorless laugh. “No worries, I understand, you were very clear. Point taken,” he sneers, starting to walk again.

“No, you don’t understand,” Sander pleads with him, taking his hand in his own to keep him from leaving. Robbe wants to pull it back, but the distressed look in Sander’s eyes makes him hesitate. “I didn’t want our first kiss to be a part of some stupid game. Not when I spent weeks trying to come up with a perfect scenario for our first kiss in my head.”

Robbe promptly loses his breath at his confession. 

“You wanted to kiss me before?” 

“Ever since I saw you,” Sander confirms in a small voice. His demeanor lacks the confidence Robbe got acquainted with, ripped of any trace of the usual conckiness. Instead, Sander appears almost shy, biting his lip nervously as if waiting for a blow and heart-breaking rejection.

There won’t be a rejection though. Not tonight. 

Without second-guessing himself, Robbe takes that one step that still separates them and seals their lips together, hands drifting to Sander’s rosy cheeks on their own, like there was a magnet pulling them in. Sander is stunned at first, his lips unresponsive, but it only takes about three seconds for his brain to catch up and then.

Then.

Then there’s Chernobyl in Robbe’s head.

Fuck.

The way this boy kisses.

Phew.

Robbe’s brain shuts off as Sander’s mouth moves over his with intention, sliding together in a rhythm that leaves him breathless. It’s almost impossible to keep all the noises that threaten to escape inside, one small whimper getting out without Robbe’s accord, but it’s okay because it gets swallowed by Sander’s unyielding lips right after it leaves Robbe’s, making Sander pull him even closer.

Eventually, they have to stop, getting dizzy from the lack of air. When their mouths do separate though it’s only for a centimeter and they keep panting in that small space between them, soon breaking out in quiet giggles.

“I've wanted to kiss you ever since I saw you too. Ever since that stupid meeting,” Robbe admits, feeling brave and like he’s floating on air, no confession scary enough right now. Sander looks very pleased with his words, and Robbe can feel the telltales of his regular confident smile coming back to his face under his lips when Sander pecks him softly.

Then, he draws back, regarding Robbe with eyes full of mischief.

“I only joined to meet you.”

That makes Robbe cock his brow in surprise and he searches his face for a lie or at least a joke, but he doesn’t find any. “You saw me before?”

There’s a pause and then Sander’s smile turns softer. “I saw you the first day of school.”

And, wow. He did not expect such a turn of events. 

“You were sitting at a lunch table with your friends, deep in thought, looking so beautiful you took my breath away. It felt like I saw an angel.”

Blood floods Robbe’s cheek and he drops his eyes under Sander’s intense gaze, because he’s not used to such praise, or praise whatsoever. And then there’s Sander, looking at him like he’s something precious, like he hung the moon and stars, touching him so gently and kissing him so passionately and Robbe feels like passing out.

Sander must have sensed he was getting overwhelmed because he chuckles quietly and cradles his cheek in his palm, thumb sweeping under his eye in a soothing motion as he leaves a few small kisses on his other cheek, melting Robbe in a pile of goo right there on the sidewalk, quiet night around them.

Once he pulls himself together, he can’t resist the tugging at the corners of his mouth and a full-blown smile blooms on his face that’s instantly matched by Sander’s own.

“You know, I don’t think I ever played spin the bottle before but I’d give it zero stars on booking.com,” he declares suddenly pulling a laugh out of Robbe. “I was so scared I’m gonna have to watch you kiss somebody else, phew!” He places a hand on his chest comically, turning on the dramatics. “My poor heart wouldn’t take it, Robin!”

And fuck, he’s so cute that Robbe can only laugh at this (his?) dork, fondly rolling eyes at his antics.

“Yeah, I didn’t want anybody to kiss you either. And it’s Robbe,” he adds with a long-suffering sigh, futilely, he’s sure, but it’s still worth it because Sander’s cheek in tongue expression lets him know the boy loves to rile him up and is not going to stop anytime soon.

Still, to wipe off the smug smile for the time being he pulls him back into a kiss by the lapels of his leather jacket and Sander doesn’t exactly protest such. The second kiss is slower, more thorough, but still mind blowing enough for Robbe to feel heat tugging at his stomach.

“Will you go on a date with me? Tomorrow? Or any other time you’re free? Please?” Sander whispers in the small space between them after they finally break apart, foreheads resting against each other and fireworks going on in Robbe’s brain. Despite them standing so close Robbe can see Sander’s face pretty clear, and he can see his hopeful but tentative expression as he waits for him to answer, eyes growing unsure with each second of silence.

Not wanting to keep him in suspense anymore, he gives his parted lips one more lingering kiss, too weak to resist them when they shine so prettily in the street light above them. “Tomorrow sounds perfect.”

[readyplayerhann]

King of the World.

Starring... Bang Chan & Y/N Y/L/N

Mentions... other Stray Kids

Warnings: threats of violence, prostitution, and death. explicit language

Universe: mafia!bang chan, gang!bang chan, mob!bang chan

Word Count: 1.5 K

Last week, you stole from gangster Bang Chan unknowingly. This week, he has came to your house twice, this time coming with a favor to ask.

...

"Hello, princess." Chan's voice greeted you as soon as you stepped into your dimly lit home. You  remembered that you turned off your lights before going to work so the sight of the lights when you pulled up to your house in your beat up car caused dread to flood your system, stilling the movements of your body.

You could've driven away, chosen to postpone the inevitable, avoid Chan, but you knew the man would just chase after you. Whatever patient feelings he had toward you vanishing and leaving him with a bitter taste in his mouth and a finger on the trigger. You wanted to avoid trigger happy Bang.

You don't say anything for a few moments, just shrugging your bag off, your jacket following suit. As you moved, your brain restricted most of your body's motion, moving slowly during your tasks. You could sense the heat of the gang banger's gaze on your back, but you take your time trying to collect yourself, not wanting him to see you sweat. That decision could prove faulty if the intruder in your outside became impatient. Still, you slowed yourself as you took off the over-garment.

"What? You're not going to greet me?" He taunted in a raspy deep-tone. You caught rustling over your shoulder as he moved him his seat in your dining room. The chair scrapped across the  hardwood of your floor as he shoved the seat into place. You cringed at the sound before tensing up against your command as he sauntered closer.

"And you said I'm the one who doesn't have manners." He goaded before a light scoff drawled from his mouth, his body coming to invade your space from behind. Your body locked immediately, your heart rattling away in your chest as he helped you escape the confines of your jacket. He handed the fabric with such care that the juxtaposition of that and him being a harden criminal you knew him to be was apparent. Rugged, scarred fingers grazed your arm, slowly, gently before stopping on your upper arms before dropping to his side. You straightened, back becoming stiff which only pressed you closer to Chan.

If Chan noticed your reaction he doesn't say anything, he just pulled away taking your jacket along with him and throwing it on top of your tiny dining table. It grazed the table top before falling uselessly to the floor.

You turned completely towards him, no more hiding yourself away.

"Minho," His voice was stern as he spoke to the man unknown to you. You hadn't even noticed him when you walked in. He turned to the other man standing in the corner, silently, his face a mask devoid of any emotions, his eyes black and soulless, "Go take a walk. I want to talk to princess alone for a second."

The man made a grunt of agreement, his dark eyes trailing over your frame as he walked pass you. He flashed you a quick smile, a bloodied and cunning one if you had to describe it. It's only true purpose was to draw out the fear within it's desired victim and it worked, dragging the dead corpse that was once your carefully hidden fear out for them both to see. You breathe caught in your throat and you have to fight to breath again.

The male closest to you leaned forward again, allowing his lips to press against the shell of your ear. You wanted to pull back knowing it was futile, but you tried anyways but Chan caged you in against a nearby counter with his face so close, his breath ghosting over your lips.

Chan had a naturally kind face, soft eyes that might've held the world if he wasn't burned by it and a gentle smile if he allowed himself to do so. The dimples of his cheeks sat there like the perfect imperfection they were. If you both were in a different situation, where you didn't owe him money and he wasn't willing to kill you to get it back, you might've been into his advances. Or, rather his close proximity.

You turned away, thinking your eyes lingered too long on the face of the home invader.

"Look at me." Chan ordered, one his hands coming to grasp at your jaw to force you to meet his eyes. His hands are rough as he forced you to look at him and you jostled in his touch. His eyes pierce yours as you're made to take him in. Twinges of anger swirl in his dark brown, almost black eyes in the night and you shivered at the reach it has on your body.

Even with your head positioned to look at him, your eyes bounced everywhere except for the man before you. Upon your avoidance of the man, you noticed the money stacked high over your table, the one with the fallen jacket beside it. The money that you stole. He had found it or what was left of it. You wouldn't expect anything less from someone who had broken into your house twice.

"Oh," He grinned, following your line of sight to catch a glimpse of the paper bills stacked neatly, "You see the money? You see I counted it, but it's a little short. Like a hundred grand short." Chan turned back to you, dropping his hand from your face and returning to cage you in, "Have you figured out how you're going to get my money back, princess?"

"I-I-" It's the first time you try to speak and you realize immediately how fucking dry your throat his. Chan's lips twitched slightly at your hesitance and offered a mockingly encouraging brow, "I'm t-taking extra shifts at work. I'll get you your money, I just need time."

"Something tells me it'll be a while before you get that hundred grand from your job." He remarked, pulling away from you and walking towards the dining table. He took in your dingy, broken down, one story home, a note of distaste in his eyes as he inspected the place. It was rugged, yes, but it was one of the only places you could afford that was decently away from major crime hot spots. Turns out that didn't matter because crime fucking showed up anyways.

The absence of his presence allowed you to breathe for a moment, before a glint of metal  on Chan's hip caught your eyes.

"You know," Chan drawled quietly, taking his seat at the head of the table like he was the king of the world. He flicked his eyes in your direction as he reached for his hip, revealing a gun dipped in sterling silver and your heart dropped to your stomach, "I usually don't do house calls. I would normally leave that for to the others. Minho for example should've been the one to visit you and your partners maybe along with Hyunjin or Changbin, but when I heard it was a single person who stole half a million bucks from me, I just had to see the fucker who was confident enough - no stupid enough to steal from me."

"Imagine my surprise when I'm told a suburban rat with no priors was bold enough to take from me."

"I needed the money." It was all you can say. It's the truth, but it didn't mean jack shit to the man in front of you. Chan's face remained unimpressed, plump lips thinning into a line as he regarded you.

"Desperation is a funny thing, princess. It can be in response to many events. Heartbreak, finical standing, the need to succeed but the result is always the same. Selling yourself. Whether that be your mind, body or soul. Something has to be exchanged for your errors to right themselves." Chan took his eyes away from you for a moment, brown eyes dragging across the paper in front of him, "Now which one are you willing to sell?" His brow was peaked again, no longer taunting, just plain questioning. It still managed to raise a bit of stress within you.

You spluttered, lips closing and opening as you try to gauge his question with a heavy heart. Your eyebrows furrowed as you stare back at the man eyeing you.

"Y'know, some are lucky enough to end up dead from the their desperate attempts to salvage their lives. Others in prisons and a few manage to come out unscathed only to realizing the mirror will remind them of the scars of their past. But you?" He left out a harsh laugh, dark eyes shining, in the pale moonlight seeping in, embracing your shivering body, "You got the worst fate of all. You're indebted to me."

Chan moved to his feet, swiftly gathering himself and calling for Minho. He stepped forward and you take a step back. His lips curled into a pleasantly cunning smirk at your frighten features.

"There's a shipment coming in at the doc five, downtown. I need you to be there at eleven pm to pick it up and drop it off as this location." He pulled a card with his chicken scratch on it and slide it in front of your face, giving your eyes a break from staring at the hauntingly handsome man in front of you.

Chan shoved the card into your hand, impatient as you just stared at him in disbelief. He turned to leave.

He paused to call your name, "And Y/N?"

"Y-yes?"

"You die the moment you're late. Don't disappointment me , princess."

[caramellohi]

I decided to put all of the particularly notable youtube music recap songs in one ask as to not kill you instantly!

this one might be a bit long. (apologetic)

#4- internet ruined me (unexpected but not surprised)

#6- eight by sleeping at last (it's my mental breakdown and I get to choose the music)

#7- saline solution (banger)

#12- innocence by madeon (I expected this to be top 5, probably only isn't bc I listened to one hour loops of is until youtube mobile added a loop feature)

#13- heat waves by glass animals (I didn't need to say who that was by)

#14- jubilee line (expected!)

(I have both a cover of welcome to castle irwell and the original both on my top 100, but I listen to the cover more)

#15- welcome to castle irwell by crywank (cover by otisjoy)

#16- line of sight by odesza (refer to #12)

#19- in love with an e-girl (yassss :])

#29- your new boyfriend (wilbur enjoyer)

#31- can I exist by missio (refer to #16 and #12)

#37- since I saw vienna (I can play most of this on guitar)

#39- losing face (surprised it isn't higher)

#45- good grief by bastille (fully recommend)

(time skip)

#96- creature by half alive (I really expected this to be higher)

I left out quite a bit because this isn't a murder attempt! (and because I need to keep my dignity)

I really only started actively trying to discover new music/bands in the last few months so it didn't have much time to make an impact on my recap

:]

ok i'm going to talk ab these individually so i'm gonna put it under a cut so that way ppl who don't care don't have to read it lmao

ok so first internet ruined me ofc a banger a great tune

next eight by sleeping at last Now i'm in a good mental state rn but if i wasn't i feel like that song would be the last straw before my breakdown u know what i mean

next saline solution easily one of my favorite songs from ycgma (youll find as you read this i actually saw all of the songs are ycgma are "one of my favorites) the album is just fucking Good)

INNOCENCE BY MADEON BANGER BANGER went straight into my playlist i loved it

heat waves ofc a classic Tbh (my fave song from that album is probably space ghost coast to coast ik you didn't ask but i wanted to share anyway smile)

jubilee line yasss a classic a banger i listen to this song very loudly in the car and i bang my fist on the steering wheel it's awesome

i listened to the original of welcome to castle irwell and it reminded me of another song <- i'll come back to that one

next is line of sight by odesza i listened to the original and the reprise and i liked the reprise a Lot (i just . rly like the sound of string instruments)

i'm in love with an e-girl and your new boyfriend YASSS BANGERS

can i exist by missio also a banger (they have another song called twisted that i think you would Enjoy)

since i saw vienna yes the song that makes me wanna sob every time it comes on (the lyric i'll put down my roots when i'm dead gets me every time)(also it's so cool that u can play that on guitar i gen love the guitar sm)

losing face maybe (??) my favorite song on ycgma it's a close tie with im sorry boris but losing face is Soo good the ending rly gets me

GOOD GRIEF BY BASTILLE ALSO A HUGE BANGER that also went right into my playlist Soo good

creature by half alive a JAM this might go in my chill moment playlist Also the cover art is gorgeous

[onechicago-upsteadrhekker]

One last submission for the Chicago PD Secret Santa for @fictionismyforte

Jay’s had a rough day and Hailey is there, just like always. Title taken from ‘Soldier’ by Fleurie

Hope you enjoy!

keep marching on

The apartment was dark, only the light of a baseball game playing quietly on the tv illuminated the living room where he sat staring off into space.

Today had been hard. Really hard.

It had been one of those days that would stay with him for the rest of his life, reappearing during nightmares, going onto the mental list of innocents dead he kept in his head.

Seeing those two kids with bullets in their heads made him want to go out and kill every gang banger terrorist between Chicago and Afghanistan. It had made his blood boil, confused and furious at how anyone could take another’s life—a child’s life.

But he’d had to compartmentalize the emotions that had hit him full force when he’d walked into that shabby living room, not prepared for the sight that greeted him. No one could prepare for a sight like that, but he’d had a job to do. A case to make.

It was just another scene. Just another call he’d responded to and now it was just another crime to solve.

He couldn’t focus on the memories that flooded his head or the immense grief or the crippling guilt or the profound regret that threatened to overwhelm him at that moment and the moments that had followed since.

He’d had to put his head on straight. He had to solve the double homicide of two tender age victims.

And he was able to lock that part of himself down with an ease that scared him. Was he getting desensitized to the violence he was met with every day? Was he finally getting used to witnessing the deaths of children?

He wasn’t sure but that wasn’t the part that bothered him most.

No, the part that bothered him most was how the world kept spinning like nothing had happened. How life just carried on, no different from any other day.

But Jay knew better. He knew that two mothers were out there right now, numb and wondering how they were going to face another day without the child they had protected and loved and reared since birth.

He knew that there was a woman named Kimona Williams whose world did stop spinning three years ago when her little girl was shot.

When he shot her little girl. A little girl who never recovered and would never smile or dance or play again because of him. The guilt eating him alive at times.

He knew there were parents in Afghanistan who were still grieving the loss of their children, the price of living in a war zone.

He could still picture their faces, hear their screams when he’d delivered the news that he’d found their missing child, dead, thrown behind the trash heap or out in the desert buried under sand.

So yeah. Jay knew better than the millions of blissful people who carried on with their life spending the day doing trivial things such as shopping or playing on their phone, having no idea that another innocent life had been taken so cruelly.

A sharp knock on the door startled him out of his despairing thoughts and he didn’t even have to go to the door to know who it was.

He knew that knock but more importantly, he knew the person knocking.

Hailey had never left him to struggle on his own. In fact, she could almost tell that he was struggling even before he knew it himself.

Was she always so perceptive of everybody? Or was it just him? Jay quietly, bashfully hoped it was just him, not that he would ever ask her.

“Jay,” He heard her muffled voice shout through the door, “if you don’t come to this door right now, I’m gonna use the spare key.”

Rolling his eyes, he pushed himself up off the couch and hoped that he didn’t look too depressed as he reached the door, unlocking it and swinging it open for an anxiously waiting Hailey. She rushed in, her cheeks rosy and a bottle of his favorite whiskey in her gloved hands.

“It’s freezing out there,” She exclaimed as she made her way into his kitchen before he could say a word. He followed her, watching as she stood on her toes to reach the shelf where he kept his drinking glasses.

She didn’t say anything further, busying herself with pouring them whiskey, moving about his kitchen as comfortably as she would in her own.

He took the glass she slid across the counter as she hopped up on the barstool with her own glass, settling in before she gave him an expectant look out of the side of her eye, tilting her head ever so slightly.

He knew what that meant. Just like he always knew what she meant or thought with the way she would give him side glances and charged stares across the bullpen.

She was waiting for him. She was letting him know he could do this in his own time, but she was also making it clear she wasn’t going anywhere until he talked to her.

Following her movements, he settled into the barstool next to her, taking a sip of his drink to fortify himself before sharing his thoughts with her.

“I’ve seen a lot of dead kids, Hailey,” He started softly, looking down at his glass, “Watched a lot of them die.”

She didn’t say anything, letting him take his time as he fiddled with his drink, “I see each and every one of them in my dreams at night. Their young eyes dimmed with death, their bright smiles disappearing forever.”

“Those two boys I found today? That image will never go away, adding to the dozens of other kids I’ve seen killed in the line of fire. And when I think about how it happened. How someone shot two little kids just for some dope,” He trailed off, clenching a fist, “God, Hailey. It makes me want to tear this city apart until people get it. Until every murderer, gang member, drug dealer, junkie, etcetera is off the streets for good.”

Jay shook his head in disgust, “Those two kids should still be alive Hailey but instead they’re laying on cold slabs in the morgue and their families are wondering how they are going to get up in the morning. How they’re going to carry on with life without them,” He paused again, “It has to change. We’re not doing enough.”

The words ring out in the silent kitchen for a few seconds before Hailey softly responded, “We never do, Jay. All we can do is our best and hope that we’re doing some good, making some change, even if we can’t always see it.”

Her slow, steady breaths were comforting, “Today, our best wasn’t good enough and more often, that’s the case but that’s the job. There isn’t much room for happy endings in our line of work, and you know that better than anyone.”

“Our best didn’t save those kids but our best sure as hell can find the person responsible and we’re going to make sure they pay for their crimes,” She said it with absolute certainty as if that would make everything alright, the balance of justice being restored but he knew that still wouldn’t change the fact two kids were dead.

And Hailey knew that, but she also knew that if they dwelled on those cold, harsh facts then they would never be able to do their job. To move on with life.

Everyone had to deal with it in their own way. Make some sense of it in their head and then lock it away, only to revisit it alone in a manner that wouldn’t make their heads swim and their minds drown.

His and Hailey’s way was to talk about it over a drink. Or maybe two.

Sometimes it required the other to stay the night, to be on the lookout, to remind the other which way was up and then help them deal with it in a way that wouldn’t eat them alive constantly thinking about it.

Seeing Hailey tonight didn’t change the fact that two boys were dead or any of the other kid’s deaths he’s seen but she had helped. She had this way of telling him how it was, matter of fact but always being so right because she got it. She understood because she’s been through it too.

Yeah, maybe she was never stationed in Afghanistan like he was but that didn’t change the fact that she was fighting a war.

There was a war going on right here in Chicago.

One they were both a part of, right in the thick of but there was one difference between the war here and the war he’d fought in Afghanistan.

Here he had Hailey, and that, he knew, made all the difference.

It didn’t change all of the horrible things he’d seen or done but he knew now that he would get through it with her by his side.

Thanks for reading!