#“you know when you drop on a roller coaster?” - will season 3

[gayofthefae]

Throwback to(last week) when I tried to decipher Mike's inner monologue from his playlist but just ended up feeling really depressed and kinda nauseous when I got to the season 4 songs.

Say what you will, but they captured his pov in that playlist 😭

[waltricia]

Bridgerton season 2 episode 3, “A Bee in Your Bonnet” is ✨magic✨ and let me tell you why.

For those of us who didn’t read the book and knew nothing of what was going to happen, we truly went on an incredible and surprising roller coaster of an experience.

We start the episode with seeing the guy from Hellboy and being like ‘oh yay, it’s the guy from Hellboy!’

… only for him to die three minutes later. And that scene is rough. It’s sudden and abrasive. And the sounds are jarring. The death is scored by tense strings. Then a moment of quiet. Then the AMAZING Ruth Gemmell begins taking us on Violet’s traumatic grief journey, which starts with her jolting Anthony (and us) out of the quiet.

And a thunderous heartbeat threatens him as he walks toward this entirely altered, unwanted life path. And that’s obviously the beginning of his PTSD.

In the other flashbacks throughout the episode, we continue to hear horrific, heart-rending pain radiate out of Violet while Anthony must not only attempt to endure it, but cover his own grief. Anthony and his siblings (and again, we the audience) all have to listen to Violet grieve while she’s giving birth! Screams on top of screams.

And the last flashback is technically quiet, but just as devastating because, like the moment of Edmund’s death, the quiet is weaponized. It signifies the death inside Violet.

It should go without saying that Jonathan Bailey is also a brilliant actor, but I’ll say it now anyway. Damn, he good! He and Ruth partnered perfectly in this grief journey. Serious props to them both because I felt this shit.

And then finally we come to the end. We had been immersed in the horrible aftermath of that striking tragedy. Between the flashbacks- in the present day- we had followed Anthony through the rooms and grounds where he had suffered silently. We had seen Edmund’s grave. We had learned that Anthony’s greatest fears and insecurities all stemmed from that tragic event ten years prior.

And then another fucking bee comes along.

And I swear to god, the first time I watched this, when Kate got stung, my heart was pounding, I was terrified, and my instinctive reaction was “oh my god, is she going to die?!” In hindsight, it’s obviously insane to think that she would be killed off at all, let alone in this scene. But the very fact that, for a moment, that was a legitimate fear I had is exactly why this episode is so god damn brilliant. I felt what Anthony felt. And I’m not the only one! I’ve seen other people’s similar reactions to this scene. The episode really is a roller coaster; easy, lighthearted moments (pall mall, drug tea), interspersed with the terrifying drops and loops that are Anthony’s painful memories which constantly haunt him. And then it brought us right back to that first traumatic moment. Because Anthony has PTSD! And that’s what PTSD does. Anthony is right back where he was, literally not far from the same spot outside Aubrey Hall, standing in front of a person he loves, watching them get stung by a bee on almost the same spot on their body. The tense string scoring comes back and Anthony panics because he’s completely helpless again.

And all of those elements- the setting, the scoring, the acting- combined to terrify us and make us forget something critical: most people don’t die from beestings.

And here’s where it gets really profound for me. Because it’s not just about how we feel Anthony’s fear. It’s also about how Kate completely obliterates it. Without knowing that history and without realizing the full extent of what her actions would mean, she does exactly the right thing. Rather than die and rather than also panic or shy away from his vulnerability, she meets it with her own in the form of care and steady assurance, which is true strength. And in so doing, she stops this cyclical moment in its tracks and completely alters the trauma. She puts his hand on her heart, and the heartbeat comes back. But this time, it’s not threatening. It’s inviting.

And just like in the first scene, the moment is over all too quickly. Just like in that scene, Anthony is thrust onto a new path. But where that moment was damaging, this one is healing. And we feel that too. And it’s the greatest experience that art can give us.

It’s catharsis.

And that’s why this episode is magic. 🐝✨

[wykart]

The last ten minutes of 'The Massacre' wrecked me oh my god. The emotional roller coaster.

First you get Steven going off at the Doctor (and I'm still not clear on what the Doctor was doing for that entire episode?? I guess the Abbot genuinely just looked like him but I don't really believe that...), calling him out like no one else has since Barbara back in the Edge of Destruction, I'd say, which was the Doctor's first major turning point as a character.

After the horror of the Daleks' Master Plan, now this, and the Doctor appearing to show no remorse (even though we know he does), Steven has had enough. He leaves, and the Doctor's alone! He's so sad about it he even manages to get Ian's name right when reminiscing. He would never tell any of them that he cared outright, but he does, deeply (and I maintain that he knew there was no danger of the Dalek ship killing Ian and Barbara when they returned to Earth, he was just trying to convince them to stay). He even contemplates returning to Gallifrey! And then of course the TARDIS drops him off in the perfect place to have Dodo run inside, who the Doctor remarks looks just like Susan, so he just...takes off with her inside. I thought that his adoption of Vicki was blatant but this is even more explicit, because he doesn't even ask her lol.

This man is hanging on by a fucking thread and we're on season 3. It does seem he's beginning to face his extremely inconsistent and rarely-followed rule of non-interference though (not that he's going to develop consistency in the matter any time soon, or ever), which is quite interesting, more so knowing where he will end up in a few seasons' time. I also find interesting the way he justifies his own brand of meddling compared to that of the Monk (which is premeditated and with intention, rather than reactive - dare I say it: vain, arrogant, and sentimental...) It's so good, because in all the centuries bringing the Doctor from this moment into the present day, he's still stuck in the same loop, the same patterns of both loss and realisation. I love it.

[loveoversense]

ALRIGHT IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER CHAOTIC NON-CHRONOLOGICAL FIRST THOUGHTS POST. AS ALWAYS, SPOILERS AHEAD!

1- not that any of them will see this, but just, once more so much gratitude and admiration for the cast and crew. This show was worked on with so much love and dedication, especially by the performers and it's visible in every scene. I'm in love with pretty much all of them and hope to see them in season 2,3,4,5 and so on, but also in many other projects ❤️

2- Romitri, like I admitted before, was literally my first ever OTP, the ship that got me into fanfic, so most of my posts were screaming about them and the depth and chemistry Sisi and Kieron conveyed, but I just wanted to take a special moment for our Lissa and Christian. Daniela and Andre were and are impeccable, especially considering the emotional roller-coaster they had to work through this season and they did it so so well. His little smile with the "Let's live dangerously."? Perfection. I melted right then and there.

3- Mia and Meredith are the best couple I love them. More of them always please. So happy they didn't fridge the lesbians goddamn. Also?? Meredith alchemist storyline yes please? Tell me more?!

4- the team ups we got to see! Christian and Rose, Romitri, Rose and Janine, all of it was incredible.

5- I would have loved for Romitri to have more significant 1:1 moments and the ending hurt but in such a good way, but ugh the emotions this episode all around were incredible again

6- I love they sort of subverted the trope of "main couple is in love because the writers said so" by dedicating a scene to proving they know each other with that bickering scene.

7- also yes I love the battle couple trope, sue me

8- RIP Andre (round 2)

9- the way my heart DROPPED when our Comrade was bit

10- I love that they make Dimitri have a potentially more interesting role in everything in the second season by making him the 'inside man'. Like yes undercover Comrade go off, protecting the love of your life and your charge the best you can even if it means you can't be together with Rose the way you want to

11- although, does this mean he's gonna have to fake date Tatiana next season? I do love the potential for tension and drama there😏

12- God I would really love a second season. In the end I enjoyed this series so much and seemingly people enjoyed working on it, they deserve another round at this

many more thoughts and fic to come so stay tuned~

[miralfake]

Nhl 20 waivers

Koskinen had a hot start, then cooled off, and has seen his rostered percentage rise and fall like a roller coaster. Goaltending Mikko Koskinen, G, Edmonton Oilers (61% Rostered) With 75 hits and 67 blocks, he’s worth streaming from the waiver wire until the offense dries up. He has 13 points in 42 contests this season, so he’s more than doubled his point total in that short span. In his past four outings, he’s posted seven points. Many, including myself, dropped him as it seemed the offense just wasn’t there this year. It was quite the opposite for the longest time, as Holl didn’t find the scoresheet until his 20th game of the campaign. Holl posted 18 and 21 points in his previous two seasons, so expectations going into 2021-22 were that he’d score at a similar rate again. Justin Holl, D, Toronto Maple Leafs (11% Rostered) He’s a lock in the Devils’ top four, averaging 20:58 of ice time per night. He’s scoring at a 36-point pace, which is 10 more points than his career-high. Through 49 matchups he has four goals, 18 assists, 60 hits, and 95 blocks. Defense Ryan Graves, D, New Jersey Devils (34% Rostered)ĭougie Hamilton was New Jersey’s big offseason acquisition, but Graves has been a solid addition as well. Usually leagues that track plus/minus need to avoid players on the bottom few teams, but Schmaltz won’t sewer your plus/minus rating despite the Coyotes being dead last in the league. His minus-2 rating is the second-highest among regulars on the Coyotes. He has 11 goals and 25 points, including a recent run where he notched six points in a three-game span. Injuries have limited Schmaltz to 34 appearances this year, but he’s making the most of the games he plays. Nick Schmaltz, C/RW, Arizona Coyotes (24% Rostered) He had a monster night during Monday’s 7-0 blowout over the Los Angeles Kings, posting three goals, an assist, six shots, and a plus-3 rating. Even more so when you see he had a five-game point that involved seven goals and a pair of assists. That alone is plenty of reason to claim DeBrusk from the waiver wire. Jake DeBrusk, LW/RW, Boston Bruins (27% Rostered)ĭeBrusk has been playing on Boston’s top line alongside Brad Marchand and Patrice Bergeron. Finding players that produce in numerous categories at an efficient rate can be tricky, but Coleman’s active four-game point streak makes it all the easier to snag him from the waiver wire. More notably, he has 156 shots on goal and 109 hits. Two of those points were scored short handed. He has 11 goals and 14 assists through 51 games. Blake Coleman, C/LW/RW, Calgary Flames (48% Rostered)Ĭoleman is a player that can help in a number of categories. He’s a fixture in the top six, and can be relied upon for offense, including his 16 power-play points. In fact, he’s been getting more productive as the season progresses, racking up 13 points in his last 12 meetings. He had 43 points in 53 games last year, to 40 points in 52 games so far this season. It turns out that it hasn’t changed much. I think many fantasy managers felt his trade from the Philadelphia Flyers to the Columbus Blue Jackets would have a negative impact on his fantasy value. The former 85-point winger has seen his stock drop in each of the past five years, dropping so far that he needs a mention on the waiver wire report. It’s strange to see Voracek available in so many leagues. Week 20 Fantasy Hockey Waiver Wire Forwards Jakub Voracek, RW, Columbus Blue Jackets (58% Rostered) There are several others and I'm dead sure that Riz Remes knows exactly where they are and why they're there.Not using Fantrax for your fantasy hockey league? Check out our Fantasy Hockey Commissioner and find out why you should be. This is one of these, others are for instance the inability to trade as soon as you're out of the play-offs (trading starts 7th June for all teams), the inability to trade after the trade deadline (this is OK IRL - you can't ice the player but you can trade for him), re-waivering a player claimed from waivers doesn't follow the right rules. There are several areas where EHM doesn't mimic NHL exactly. IRL ALL players under contract are considered to be "on roster" from day one of the off-season, then when regular season waivers kicks in you have to go through waivers (unless exempt) in order to move someone to the farm, you can't bypass this by assigning someone to AHL earlier in the off-season (as you can in the game). This is related to the also incorrect possibility to bury a player in the AHL during off-season so as to not risk having to waiver him when the season starts. I think that it's correct, I am not 100% sure, but in the pre-season there should be more time.

[violetren]

psst hi I am a huge fan of sstl, like it's probably the greatest fiction experience I've ever experienced, but I've never listened to any other works like it! would you recommend other works Ishani's been part of, or do you have any recommendations in general for, I guess, narrative fiction audio?

Oh for sure. Idk what exactly made you pick up ssttl or what about it struck a chord so for now I'm only gonna throw like 3 or 4 things out here based on vibe or plot similarities to ssttl and my personal preferences. If you wanna tell me more about what you're into I can try give you a wider range of recs.

First up, The Strange Case of Starship Iris.

If you picked up ssttl because it's sci-fi with lead characters of colour and queer rep, or because of how its futuristic in a way that feels believably fucked over by capitalism and yet still has a gentleness and hopefulness to it, or because you like character driven narrative then for sure give this a try.

It's also the reason I knew Ishani Kanetkar's name and knowing her name is why I immediately moved ssttl to the top of my "to listen to" list. The shows concept was cool enough to grab my attention but reading Ishani Kanetkar was in the leading role made me give it immediately. I haven't listened to all of the good doctor's work but I have noticed two things: 1, she is a fantastic VA. And 2, projects she's had a significant role in usually have a really cool concept behind them. She either has fantastic tastes, incredible luck, or both. Obviously read descriptions and see if something is to your taste before listening but like, no reason not to look up her other work and use it as a launch pad.

Back the tscosi rec. The story begins by following the harrowing day of biologist Violet Liu as her research vessel falls apart around her after an explosion. Against all odds someone is there to rescue her, captain Kay Grisham picks up her distress call, and the rescue comences. The rest of the season follows the fall out of that tragic explosion and heroic rescue.

The show is ongoing, currently has 2 complete seasons out with a 3rd (and I believe final) season to come.

Rec 2: Girl In Space

A funny and resourceful scientist lady, living alone in space, talking to her recorder logs and her ships glitchy AI (who may or may not have or be developing sentience), and one day being very surprised when suddenly she has a human person to talk to instead. Sound familiar?

The plot is actually very different though. Our girl X lives on a space station that can never return home and her whole existence is as much of a mystery as what exactly her mission is supposed to be. The soundscaping on this show combined with Sarah Rhea Werner's (and the rest of the casts) acting is absolutely amazing.

There is currently 1 season fully released and the second season is apparently due out this year. In reccing this I may have accidentally begun a relisten.

Rec 3: Wolf 359

This one is actually complete if that means anything to you. Figured I'd drop one in since the other two have been ongoing. Its a big one, over 60 episodes plus a ton of bonus episodes.

Wolf 359 follows the crew of the u.s.s haphaestus an isolated little research vessel orbiting a star designated Wolf 359. It starts out goofy and like there isn't gonna be much plot, this is a cunning ruse to lull you into a false sense of security before hurtling you into an emotional roller coaster that will make you fear for, cry for, laugh with, and grow to love the rag tag crew. The characters are very compelling in that they are allowed to be flawed, some to the point that they are unlikeable, but in that good way that means you're connected with the story and wanna see them get their comeuppance, not that they're badly written and make you wanna stop listening kinda way.

Also like half the cast is voiced by the writer Zach Valenti, and even telling you that, if you check the show out there are gonna be episodes where if you hear the credits list and go "wait, he was that many people!?" Amazing VA abilities.

Rec the fourth, The Penumbra Podcast.

TTP has two story lines and you can listen to one without ever touching the other but Imma rec both here because there is a reason this podcast as a whole makes so many rec lists for anyone looking to get into audiodrama series. Both storylines have very different vibes and approaches, but both deal overall subtly deal with what it is like growing as a person, how rewarding it can be, but also acknowledging how fucking hard that can be.

Story line one, the Juno Steel universe, aka the Junoverse. This is a sci-fi story with a film-noir aesthetic. It follows the titular, character private detective Juno Steel a dame with a chip on his shoulder nearly as deep as a skyscraper is tall, and the cases they take in Hyperion City, a mega colony on a futuristic Mars. There is an overarching plot even as we go from case to case until eventually we move beyond that format.

The second story line is Tales from the Second Citadel. Set in a post apocalyptic high fantasy setting, the Second Citadel. This story follows the intersecting tales of several of the kingdoms knights (and a few not knights too). One of the knights will sound very familiar, Sir Damien voiced by Matthew Zahnzinger who also voices Mikail Reza in ssttl. In a truly hilarious turn of events Sir Damien also has a life changing (romantic) encounter with a scale covered non human entity.

Both story lines are highly character driven and contain a lot of heart. They also both feature a cast that is diverse in terms of race, sexuality, and gender.

As I said if you tell me more about what you liked about ssttl or why you chose to listen to it I'd be happy to give some more refined recs. All of these save for the second citadel portion of tpp involve space stuff but if you're open to more supernatural or just more terrestrial sci fi I definitely have more options you could consider.

If you ever wanna shout about ssttl or any of these shows if you end up listening to any well then you know where to find me.

Oh left field bonus rec because I just got a note about a post I made about it, Where the Stars Fell.

Unkillable lady scientist specialising in cryptid studies moves to the strange little town of Jerusalem Oregon. Becomes roommates with a reclusive author. They get along much like oil and water, it is all very gay.

I am typically a little turned off by shows with so many religious references but this one manages to be religious in the way that Good Omens is religious. That is, it's not preaching religion, its just using characters and concepts people may be familiar with from Christianity and using them to tell a funky little supernatural story with naturally high stakes grounded by very human characters. (human in the sense that they are emotional and flawed and brilliant).

It just finished its first season a couple of month ago so everyone is waiting for season 2, myself included.

[snowscribe]

Mortal Kombat Kast at a Theme Park/Disneyland Pt 1

First post! I made up/was given this prompt awhile back and tbh it’s the reason I want to start posting stuff publicly. Apologies if it’s super rough, I wrote it at like 4am lol. Basically the kombatants at a theme park/Disney idk my sleepy brain kinda flipped flop between the two. Might make seperate one with kharacters and their s/o’s at the parks if this gains enough traction. I also tried to cover as many of the kharacters as possible, though I am not comfortable with writing all of them just yet: since I just got into MK a couple months ago.

Begins under the kut! :3 

This part is for the “good guys” in Earthrealm. Or at least the ones I decided to write for. Part 2 featuring Black Dragon and Outworld + some bonus kharacters can be found here!

Cassie Cage and Jacqui Briggs organize a trip for the Special Forces to Disneyland, they manage to drag some of the Shirai Ryu, Lin Kuei, and White Lotus along as well.

Raiden

He's too damn tall and electric to ride anything so he usually sits outside of attractions, holding bags and such while the rest of the krew goes on the ride. 

Since he's always dressed in his normal attire, a lot of the other guests at the park mistake him for a park mascot or character. Lots of families stop and ask to take photos with him. 

Raiden surprisingly doesn't mind, he doesn't interact with many normal Earthrealmers often. It's a fantastic way for him to meet some of the mortals he seeks to protect and ground him into reality.

Fujin

Unlike his brother he actually can and does ride stuff. Though he has to control his excitement when he does. One time on the Expedition Everest he soared out of his seat after the first drop, smiling and gliding in the air. The operator almost had a heart attack and it was not easy for Special Forces to cover it up/explain what happened to the operators/owners. He is not allowed on Peter Pan's Flight or Soarin, don't let those puppy eyes convince you, he gets wayyyy too into those ones.

He loves ferris wheels the most and loves the theme park sweets more. Fried oreos, churros, funnel cake, cotton candy, anything warm and fluffy is going straight to his stomach, much to anyone with a paycheck/wallet's dismay.

Cassie Cage

Being Johnny's daughter and living in LA definitely means she had a season pass for Disneyland growing up. A theme park veteran, totally helps the rest of the krew understand what the heck is going on. 

Loves roller coasters the most, but won't turn down a good time on the teacups or carousel. She's been to some of the best parks in the States and knows Disneyland like the back of her hand. Favorite park is Disneyland of course, childhood nostalgia and all that. #BringBackThePeopleMover

Keeps trying to drag certain members of the Krew to certain parts of the park, Kuai to Frozenland, Erron (When he's sided with Kotal) to Frontierland, etc. They are all unhappy with her shenanigans, but Johnny is all here for it. 

Johnny Cage

Has been taking Cassie to Disneyland since she was a tot. So very much like his daughter, he's a pro at this theme park business, more specifically the locations of restrooms, restaurants, and first aid stations, basically all the things a parent should know.

Anything Cassie goes on, he goes on, which can be a double edged sword when your daughter is willing to ride basically anything. He avoids going to Kings Dominion with her simply because the Intimidator 305 exists and he doesn't want to die just yet. 

Unfortunately he's usually swarmed by the adoring public, so he typically tries to disguise himself, to varying degrees of success. He's on vacation with his friends and family, they shouldn't be burdened with the worries of being surrounded by tons of annoying fans.

Sonya Blade

She was rarely there for Cassie and Johnny's Disneyland outings, so she's more than happy to make up for it now. Only park she really went to growing up was the local county fair and hooooo boy she was not ready for the crowds, or how elaborate some of the rides are…..

 or the prices.

"Like holy shit Johnny, why didn't you tell me a crappy pizza costs THIS MUCH??"

Like Johnny, anything Cassie goes on she goes on…..at least until Cassie dragged her onto Space Mountain. 

Nope, nope, nope never again. Now she kinda rides what she wants with Cassie and Johnny then sits with Raiden when she thinks it'll be too intense. Don't tell her unit/squad though.

Packs snacks and food so they don't have to spend money on overpriced food on any theme park trips after, much to Cassie's horror.

Jacqui Briggs

Oh hell yes! She'd spend half of the day with Cassie, Kung Jin, and  Takeda, then the other half with her Dad. Intense thrill rides with Cassie and co. in the morning, then the more slower and maybe slightly less intense rides with Jax in the afternoon. Not that Jax doesn't like coasters, Jacqui just wants calm quality time with her old man.

She does try to have some one-on-one time with Takeda though. She loves drop towers much to his dismay, Guardians of the Galaxy: Mission Breakout and Tower of Terror are absolute musts.

Queen of carnival games, even if they're completely rigged she seems to always get the prizes she wants. Seriously, that cute Rowlet plushie trapped behind a "Guess my Age" game? Jacqui's got this! Cassie owes much of her collection to her.

She and Cassie also always and I mean ALWAYS do the Disney Princess breakfast meet and greet. They get genuinely upset if they forgot to book a reservation for it during the trip planning phase.

Jax Briggs

Kind of like Sonya in that he doesn't like riding things that are absolutely crazy, but will go on if Jacqui really needs someone to ride with. He loves thrills, but not nonstop. Needs breaks in-between coasters and certain rides.

He does love Rock N Roller Coaster though, he'd ride it forever if you let him. It's the only ride he doesn't need a breather for.

He’s also the reason Jacqui is so good at Carnival games, since he has an addiction to them too. The Briggs home is filled with plushies of many sizes!

Kuai Liang

What, on Earthrealm, is all of this???? He has no idea what is going on or what the point of it all is. Initially he is adamant that he isn't going to enjoy the experience. By the end of the day he's binging rides with a small smile on his face and an overpriced ice cream in hand.

He won't be smiling about the weather or the people though. Poor man is melting from the Summer heat, (if it's summer and it usually is if you're going to a theme park). Hanzo carries around water, handheld fans, and an umbrella just to keep him cool.

As a result, he loves dark rides the most, for the air conditioning, but also because he can usually sit back and soak in the story/atmosphere the attraction is trying to tell. Kuai at first thought they were tacky and childish, but rides like the Haunted Mansion or the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror made him love the format. Tower of Terror specifically made him like thrill rides as well, mostly indoor ones, but coasters cool him off well enough too. (Universal Studios Florida becomes his favorite park once Cassie forces them all to go.)

He hates It's a Small World though, even if he's dying from the Florida/California heat he'd rather suffer than go on that ride again. Jokingly, he can't stand the Carousel of Progress either because “technology” or rather praising technological advancement blindly.

Hanzo Hasashi

Like Kuai he has no idea what's going on or why they're all even here. However, he takes to it a little less than Kuai does. He mostly enjoys the experience of being surrounded by friends and loved ones and less the actual attractions.

He'll definitely ride on stuff with Kuai or Takeda, but otherwise he chills with Raiden on the side. If he had to pick a favorite kind of ride though it'd always be thrill rides/coasters. He has a soft spot for Splash Mountain, but he'll never admit it to anyone other than himself. Doesn't have a favorite park, he just wants to spend time with people he loves. Quality time with Kuai is always a good thing, even with a hefty price tag.

Seriously, park prices could be better on like, everything holy shit. Why should food or even tickets to get inside be so expensive????? Couldn't they just have stayed at home or go somewhere else????? In the states the National Parks are free…. isn't that the same thing???? Kuai stresses out over this too, but slightly less.

Liu Kang

Like Scorpion and Sub-zero, he’s very confused but unlike them more open and enthusiastic about experiencing a theme park. He tries to ride everything, but some rides are just too much for him. He actually takes to the carnival and arcade games a bit more despite absolutely sucking at them. Liu almost begs Jacqui for tips on how to get better at them, which she indulges.

He does sneak off with Kitana when the Outworld group arrives, though when he’s not with her, he’s with Kung Lao.

Kung Lao

Of course like Liu he’s very confused, but oddly takes to everything quicker than Liu does. He boasts about hitting every coaster in the park, which no one believes despite him actually doing it. Adores the thrill rides, though he’ll always stick with Liu at the carnival games if he needs company. 

To everyone’s dismay, he also loves the terrible, overpriced, theme park food. Cassie gets the meal plan specifically for him, lest they all go bankrupt.

[elminx]

Happy August!

August is a 4 Universal month (8 (August) + 5 (2021) = 13 = 1 + 3 = 4) in a 5 universal year. With both Venus and Mars currently transiting Virgo, the energy is strong this month to get organized and/or get yourself back on track for your 2021 goals.

The setup: Saturn in Aquarius and Uranus in Taurus are still square to one another and will be through December and into 2022. Pluto in Capricorn, Jupiter in Aquarius, and Neptune in Pisces are lined up ~30 degrees apart from each other. We have four plants plus an asteroid retrograde throughout August: Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune, Pluto, and Chiron. This signifies a more "yin" energy signature that is out of alignment with the forceful fire energy of Leo season.

The TL:DR: As the Sun and Mercury transit Leo, they are going to relight up our fixed t-square involving Saturn and Uranus early in the month. You may be able to break through the big blocks in your life during this time but only if you can step away from your ego. This month is full of mixed messages and misunderstandings - we are all trying to figure out our new lives right now, give yourself and your others a metric fuckton of space. The work you put into your life is what you will get back out of it - go slow and keep putting one foot in front of the other. Expecting expedited results is a recipe for disaster.

There's a lot going on in the cosmos this month - there's rarely a day that is aspect-free and they are, for the most part, challenging. This has to do with our lineup of outer planets - see the details for more information.

The Nitty Gritty:

As we enter August, our Sun-Mercury conjunction is lighting up our long-term square between Saturn in Aquarius and Uranus in Taurus. This is our unstoppable force (Uranus) meets immovable object (Saturn) energy. Something has got to give to make way for the After. Much of how August plays out for you will likely be dictated by how you have been working with and processing this long-term aspect.

If 2020's motto was "Change Before You Have To", this Saturn-Uranus square is the "Have To". Uranus is the lightning on the Tower card - the change that is unavoidable. All you can control is how you react to the change.

Yeah, that's probably a terrifying concept. I get it. But I also firmly believe that when you stand aware in the middle of the maelstrom, that's where the true magic happens. In the moment of liminality, anything is possible.

August is the maelstrom. This shouldn't really come as a surprise but I guess that some people have their heads really far inside the sands. The storm never ended, we just got a brief reprieve. I hope that you all took good advantage of it - I know that I did.

For the rest of the month, all of our personal planets will be making complicated aspects to our outer planets - this is because of the angles. It's definitely echoing the roller coaster vibe of 2021's "5" energy - you'll see that continue next month as September is a 5 month in a 5 year.

Expect epic highs and abysmal lows. Probably to have your stomach drop out from under you at least once. There's a lot going on, try to harness Mars in Virgo's ability to roll with it and worry about figuring out the details later. Mars in Virgo is very in line with August's 4 energy: make a list but keep it open-ended, show up and do the work. Amanda of Wise Skies Advice called this month "Focus Pocus" and I'm in agreement there - what you focus on grows.

There's a lot of magic to be found in August, but you need to keep your focus. If you get wrapped up in your emotions, or worse, the rising collective fear, it will be easy to lose your way. Don't feed the monster. This is especially true for empaths and other highly sensitive persons.

Dates to Pay Attention To

8/1: Sun conjunct Mercury in Leo, Mercury opposed Saturn - thoughts will be very close to the surface and potentially heavy. Watch out for the stories you tell yourself, especially about Saturnian topics: government, contracts, money, marriage - this will be in effect all through the first week of August and through the new moon

8/2: Sun opposed Saturn, Moon square Mars - this is likely to be a frustrating day. Where do you need to slow down? Where have you been pushing in a direction that is only resistance?

8/3: Venus trine Uranus, Moon square Venus - the anecdote to this malaise is to try something new

8/6: Sun square Uranus - watch out. Lie low. Stay away with explosives - observe that physically as well as metaphorically. Where is your ego getting in the way of what you need?

8/8: New Moon at 16 Leo conjunct Mercury - Depending on how comfortable you are with Mercury energy, this moon may feel enlightening or anxiety-making. Practice good self-care - soothe your system with calming crystals or nervine tea if you need to.

8/9: Venus opposed Neptune retrograde: that lie may come due today - watch out for dishonesty, especially with yourself

8/10: Mercury opposed Jupiter retrograde: What is your inner truth? What do you believe? Does it align with what you know now? What needs to be re-evaluated? Again, how you perceive this will likely have a lot to do with your relationship with Mercury.

8/11: Mercury enters Virgo, Venus trine Pluto retrograde - Mercury is at home in Virgo - expect communication to become more orderly and precise over the next three weeks. The Divine Feminine may be experiencing a rebirth at this time.

8/14: Moon in Scorpio square Saturn retrograde in Aquarius - this lights up that Saturn-Uranus square...again. Watch out, friction is likely to be high.

8/16: Venus enters Libra, Moon square Mercury, Moon square Mars - Venus is at home in the sign of Libra, expect some of our focus to be on our relationships (of all kinds) during this transit. The energy of the day will likely be volatile and moody. Both your words and your actions may be misunderstood at this time - exercise caution.

8/17 Sun in Leo trine Moon in Sag, Moon square Neptune retrograde - a lovely fire trine but watch out for illusions - all that glitters may not be gold

8/18: Mercury conjunct Mars in Virgo - work for it. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. Slow and steady wins this race.

8/19: Sun opposed Jupiter retrograde, Uranus retrograde at 14 Taurus, Moon conjunct Pluto - The energy is likely to feel at once larger than life and impossibly deep. Whether you enjoy this will have a lot to do with your personality and comfort levels. It's always wise to go slow when a major planet like Uranus retrograde but Sun opposed Jupiter may not let us do that.

8/20: Mercury trine Uranus, Moon trine Venus, Moon conjunct Saturn - you might get flashes of insight at this time but it is unlikely that you will be able to implement them just yet. Hold tight. This day also lights up our Saturn-Uranus square - stay aware and cautious. Avoid arguments.

8/22: Full Moon at 29 Aquarius, Mars trine Uranus, Sun enters Virgo - this is wildcard energy, engage with care. This again activates our Saturn-Uranus square - stay aware and stay cautious.

8/23: Venus trine Saturn retrograde, Moon opposed Mars, Moon conjunct Neptune retrograde- emotions, especially around close relationships, are likely close to the surface. You may not have all of the information or may be lying to yourself.

8/24: Mercury opposed Neptune retrograde: another big reveal - watch the news, listen carefully to what the people in your life are saying

8/25: Moon in Aries opposed Venus in Libra - moooooody. Remember great things happen when you stop being a moody cow. Give your others a break.

8/26: Mercury trine Pluto retrograde, Venus in Libra opposed Chiron retrograde in Aries - the new message is one of independence and accountability, do you hear it yet? What part of you needs to be reborn to get you on track?

8/27: Moon conjunct Uranus, Moon square Saturn: the moon activates our square again today - same old - be cautious - this is happening 4x every month right now, it's not "new news" just something to stay aware of

8/29: Mercury enters Libra: this isn't a great placement for Mercury. The idea of giving two sides equal air time without account for its truthfulness is a failing of Mercury in Libra thinking. Watch out for overthinking and analysis paralysis.

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[leafs-lover]

If He's Lucky I'll Let Him Join

Part 6: Things shift

Series Masterlist

A/N: Sorry for the delay on this, hope you like it. I only plan on 2 maybe 3 more parts of this.

Warnings: Swearing, smut (oral female receiving) unprotected sex (wrap it kids), voyeurism, 18+

Word Count: 6600

April 8, 2021

A: Hey want to go for a walk with Felix and I?

You stare at your screen for a few minutes, the message sitting on read. Since giving Auston your number a week and a half ago he has text you three times. Two were pictures of Felix, and the third was a meme.

The Leafs had a few days off during that stretch, you saw Fred a little but you haven’t seen Auston since you left his house. You also haven’t told Fred about Auston, and since he hasn’t brought it up you don’t think Auston told him.

It’s not that you did anything wrong or cheated on Fred; you aren’t in a relationship, with either man. You haven’t talked about what you are, or where this is heading, if anywhere. The season is almost half over and you have no idea what will happen after that. Last time the season ended you barely heard from Fred for three months, and Auston almost 4.

When you agreed to sleep with Auston, you never specified it would only be with Fred, only in threesome situations. You never discussed the dynamics of you and Auston, and what the boundaries were. You know all of this.

Yet something feels wrong. Like you shouldn’t have done that behind Fred’s back and you shouldn’t keep doing it without with Fred knowing. That you should talk to Fred before you and Auston sleep together again, assuming you do sleep with him again. You don’t even know if you want to sleep with him when it’s just Auston. Not that you had a bad time, it was far from it. You just don’t know what it means, if anything.

There is so much you are uncertain of, all you know is how you felt about Fred last year. Things were going great, and you talked about summer plans. They were loose plans like being his plus 1 to a teammates wedding, going up to the Muskoka’s for a weekend with Mitch and Steph. He even mentioned a five day trip to Iceland, though that seemed unlikely to happen given the amount of planning required. But everything was heading towards a relationship until the world stopped.

And now a year later, the world is spinning. People are getting vaccinated everywhere except Canada; but they say they are coming, and the countries with vaccinated people are easing restrictions. Everything seems to be heading for a new normal, but where does that leave you and Fred?

Some nights you feel like a set of holes for him to use like target practice. But other times you wake up to Fred gently brushing your hair, legs tangled beneath the sheets placing soft kisses on your forehead or shoulder and you feel like so much more.

Intimate dinners.

Sex.

Cute text messages.

Sex.

Lazy Sundays.

Sex.

Bubble baths together.

Sex.

So much back and forth, it’s very confusing. And that’s just with Fred, you can’t even begin to understand the dynamic of Auston.

He has been a roller coaster, and not just the way he throws you around in bed. The first time he was dominant, but ended it with a soft kiss. The kiss lingered on your lips for days, your mind was swirling from it. Sometimes his eyes are dark and full of fire, but other times you get glimpses of him and that kiss.

Sure you had some feelings for Auston last year, but you told yourself they were feelings of lust. Completely, 100% sexually driven. But they were just feelings of sex right? Just the heat developing in your core from being around him fogging the sense and reason of your brain.

Auston finds moments to wrap his arms around you, placing soft kisses on your forehead or your lips. Doesn’t matter if Fred is in the other room or 5 feet away he will do it. While he drives his hard dick into your walls, he’ll have eyes dark with hunger. But after they are soft, and he doesn’t hesitate to lay soft and passionate kisses on your lips while Fred is lying inches beside you.

He exudes so much dominance, both men do. You are actually surprised it doesn’t turn into a pissing match with them, but they direct it all to you. They let you think you are in control, but the first chance they get they take over. Spilling words of venom, pulling orgasm after orgasm, juices coating their cocks and fingers.

The sight alone is enough to send you home with an ache between your legs. They are patient while you are with the other one, knowing their turn is coming. Not too patient though. But through all of it they don’t fight or get jealous of you.

Until last week ago that is, running into Auston in the elevator.

When he was hovering over you, kissing along the marks Fred had left earlier in the day, you got the feeling he was jealous you had spent time with him. You don’t know if it’s because he wasn’t there or that he didn’t like that you were sleeping with someone other than him, but he seemed bothered by it. But he would be naïve to think you and Fred only sleep together with him right?

An hour before that he was mumbling in your ear while cuddling on his couch. He looked at you like he wanted to hold you tight to his chest and never let you leave. Maybe it’s just a part of who he is, how he plays girls. You know he has a reputation around Toronto, besides his performance on the ice. There are rumours that over his first four seasons he has a revolving door of women while on road trips.

Obviously this year with Covid he has been much more mellow, no rumours or stories. But you don’t know if there is any truth to the rumours, you don’t know if he’s sleeping with other women. Not on road trips, the league has strict protocols in place for road teams. But at home they are supposed to follow local health guidelines. He could easily have another girl, and you are just someone he uses when called upon.

Maybe you are just a piece for him to bide his time with until restrictions are loosened, just an easy solution with the leagues COVID protocol’s. Or maybe he sees you as something more. Either way it’s all very convoluted.

Fingers hovering over your screen you mull over everything. Just before you go to type three little dots pop up as if he can sense your hesitation. You decide to wait before replying and are met with a selfie of him and Felix cuddling in bed, tattooed arm fully on display due to his lack of shirt. A “please play with me Y/N” text obviously supposed to be from Felix coming in immediately afterwards.

You can’t help the way your legs snap shut, rubbing together in search of friction. Or the involuntary groan that tumbles out as you stare at over his arm and down to his abs. But it’s the big beady eyes of Felix that win you over and without a second thought you quickly reply with a yes.

**

“Miss, I think you dropped your keys,” you hear someone call out. Ignoring it you pan around the somewhat busy street. Car horns are sirens are heard on the streets, wind howling between the buildings making the air crisp against your face. A hand gently touches your arm and you quickly spin around on your heels, wide eyed. “Sorry,” he chuckles seeing the shock on your face “I called out but I don’t think you heard me. Are these yours?”

He holds up a keychain in your view and you sigh slightly, “yes, thank you.”

When getting ready you decided to leave your purse at home, they aren’t the most convenient while walking a dog. You threw your debit card, TTC pass, phone and keys into your pocket. Arriving out front the coffee shop a couple minutes ago your hands were cold so you reached into your pocket for your gloves.

“No problem,” he smiles.

Scanning over his face you immediately notice his bright blue eyes grazing over your face. Thick flowing dark brown hair sticks out under his Montreal Canadians ball cap, a short scruffy beard on his chiseled jaw. He looks familiar but you can’t place it.

He is tall, similar in height to Auston and Fred. Even through his black peacoat you can tell his shoulders are just as wide. A red scarf gently popping out under the collar of his jacket. “I’m Josh,” he says, and you see him smile once again, instantly you think that it is just the best smile you have ever seen.

“Hi, I’m Y/N,” you smile back.

“Can I buy your coffee? “he asks glancing to the shop behind you. “I assume that’s why you’re here,” he chuckles. “It’s not free though, it’ll cost you a half hour of your time through the park.”

You chuckle slightly, if you weren’t supposed to meet Auston in a few minutes you would struggle to say no. His wide smile and soft eyes are drawing you in, but on top of that he seems nice. Someone you would actually have a good afternoon chatting with. “I’m actually meeting someone,” you reply.

“Oh that’s a shame, I’m leaving Toronto in a few hours. Think I can get your number; take you out when I come back?”

Before you can answer you feel Felix brush against your legs and let out an excited bark. He jumps up on you almost knocking you over and you immediately feel Auston’s hands on your hips and Josh grip your elbow, holding you upright. Auston mumbles some bullshit to Felix about manners, but you ignore it. Trying to focus on the eager pup, when in actuality you feel fire ignite where their hands connect to you.

“Hey man,” Josh says to Auston releasing your elbow.

“Hey Josh,” Auston says politely stepping beside you. You immediately sense the tension, Auston puffing his chest keeping on hand on the small of your back. Josh’s gaze flicks between you and Auston a little, realizing this is the person you are meeting but he doesn’t seem too bothered by it. You take a harsh swallow, the cold Toronto air burning your throat.

Tick tock, tick tock.

You have no longer how long you all have been standing there, likely only a few seconds but time feels like it has stopped. The only sound besides passing cars is the excited whines and yelps Felix lets out while he circles around your feet. Shifting awkwardly you stare between the two men not wanting to be the first to make a move. Finally Auston clears his throat glaring at Josh, pulling you in tighter to his chest. So close you can smell his cologne.

“Well I’m going to grab my coffee. Nice meeting you y/n,” Josh smiles, stepping around you to go through the door.

“A Hab really?” Auston jokes kissing your cheek, following Josh with his eyes until the door shuts behind him. His lips are warm on your cool skin, eyes look slightly heavy from the previous night's game, and dark curls pop out under the toque he’s wearing that barely covers his ears.

“What?” you ask confused, bending down to pet Felix who is still enthralled by your presence.

“Josh,” he nods inside and you shake your head shooting him a puzzled look. “That’s Josh Anderson. He plays for the Montreal Canadians.”

“Oh that’s why he looked familiar,” you say glancing back inside briefly, you watched the game last night and you remember him. He looks a little different without the equipment or covered in sweat, but his thick hair and smile is what stood out to you. Felix takes the opportunity to kiss your cheek causing you to laugh and look back at Auston. “You watch him for a sec so I can get our drinks?” Auston asks, handing you the leash.

Josh comes out first saying goodbye to you and giving Felix a few pets before making his way down the street. Auston is out not too long after, 2 paper cups in hand. You try to hand the leash back, but he tells you to keep it, feeding you some line about Felix being happy to see you. You know Felix doesn’t care who holds his leash, he is just happy to be on a walk but you aren’t going to object.

It’s only been two days since you saw him. Fred watched him for the Leaf’s short road trip and you spent some time over there during it. While Fred went to physio you would take him on long walks, walks too long for Fred and his knee right now. Fred joked about how close you were thinking it’s the first time you met him.

You took naps on the couch and played with him. He followed you around everywhere, whining and clawing at the door when Fred locked him out for an hour. When you finally opened the door he almost tackled you with his excitement. That night when you went to go to bed he climbed between the two of you resting his head on your chest while you fell asleep, gently petting the top of his head. Every time you saw him Felix would be more excited than the last.

“Thought you Canadians are inferior to the cold,” Auston jokes when a strong wind gust blows from the lake and through the streets. Shivering you pulling your zipper up further, pulling your toque further down your ears.

“Lets go warm up, my place is only a couple blocks away,” he puts a hand on your back to guide you. It’s the smallest contact, a slight brush against your back before his hand falls into his pocket for warmth. But through your jacket and sweater your skin burns from the ever so slight touch.

Stepping into the lobby you instantly feel the warmth of his building hit your face. “You had a good game last night,” you smile knowing he can’t see it through your mask.

“Woah you actually watched,” he teases, pulling his mask over his face.

“Yeah, you know hanging around hockey players all the time figured I should watch a game or two,” you joke. “You know with not teaching I have some spare time.”

“I’m glad you find time in your busy schedule to watch me on TV.” You give him a playful nudge hitting the button for the elevator. “How is it going with work? Find anything yet?” he asks, bending down to give Felix some pets for patiently waiting.

“No, all schools in Ontario go 100% online Monday so there are a lot of us in the same situation right now across the province. I’m sure something will come along I’m not too worried right now.”

“You’re smart, you’ll figure something out,” he says looking up at you. His black mask is covering half of his face, but from the creases beside his eyes you can tell he is smiling at you. Before you can reply you hear the doors creak open and turn your attention to it.

You notice a body in the elevator who shifts into the corner to make space. Taking a step in you are met by a tall man with broad shoulders, hood of his Nike sweater pulled over his red hair, mask covering half of his face. But you immediately recognize the eyes, stopping you in your tracks.

Auston walks into your back not realizing you stopped and Felix jumps up at his feet. Fred stares at the two of you for a second with a look of confusion, blinking a few times. Like he doesn’t believe it’s actually you behind the mask; but his eyes soften and he turns his attention to the eager pup. You shift uncomfortably, eyes darting between Auston and Fred. Auston looks unphazed a small smirk tugging on his lips.

“What’s going on?” Fred asks standing up, still petting Felix’s head.

“Just grabbed some coffee,” you say quietly.

“Yeah just hanging out,” Auston adds in. “What about you?”

“Just getting home from the rink, was gonna see if you wanted to hangout.”

Auston glances over at you briefly before back to his friend, “yeah for sure man,” Auston replies. Stepping off the elevator on Auston’s floor the three of you head towards his apartment. The two of them chat about something from the game last night, almost oblivious to the fact you are there while you trail a few steps back.

Once inside Auston takes of Felix’s leash and wanders to the kitchen to get him some fresh water. Fred lingers once his shoes are off watching you remove your jacket and boots. Once you hang up your coat Fred’s hands are on your hip backing you against the door, handle digging into your back, “you two having fun.”

His words hang thick in the air, stepping closer he pushes you in further, his breath hot on your neck. When you don’t reply he squeezes your hips, driving the handle further into your back causing you to hiss out a yes. His musty cologne and hot breath has moisture pooling between your legs, the only thing holding you up is his nails digging into your skin.

“Hmm,” he hums as you take a few uneasy breaths. “How long has this been going on smuk,” he places soft open mouth kisses on your neck waiting for you to reply.

“Uh...” you stutter, voice catching in your throat when he nips your skin. “Just the,” you mumble groaning, “one other time

“Cute,” he mumbles placing a kiss to your cheek, the edge of his lips brushing the corner of yours. Pulling back slightly he smirks at you and turns his gaze down the hall, smugness plastered on his face while he locks eyes with Auston who silently watches the exchange.

Your chest heaves and you swallow dryly taking a minute. Without another word he leaves you trying to catch your breath while he walks down the hall. Craning your head slightly you see Auston at the other end watching the entire interaction. Expressionless he follows Fred to the couch, as you try to compose yourself.

You don’t know why but you contemplate walking down the hall and saying you aren’t feeling well and heading home. But that seems obvious. And Fred didn’t seem mad did he?

The three of you sit on the couch, Felix circling, constantly bringing someone a toy or whining for pets. It’s a lazy afternoon and easy, the boys watching some golf tournament that you have no interest in. Fred mindlessly runs circles over your ankle while they chat, your head resting on his pillow.

His touch is soft but soothing. Every circle he draws you feel your blood pressure drop before you finally are at ease. Fred is smiling, Auston laughs at something he said. Everything seems fine, like you worked yourself up over nothing.

“So y/n has the hots for Josh Anderson,” Auston says part way through golf which immediately catches your attention, turning your gaze from Felix to the boys. Auston has a smug look plastered on his face while he winks at you, and Fred has a dark mischievous grin.

“Oh yeah,” Fred grins as you feel your cheeks heat up.

“Apparently we aren’t doing a good enough job,” Auston grins and your eyes go wide. You hear Fred laugh lightly squeezing your ankle tightly.

“Never said that,” you whisper, so faintly you aren’t even sure you spoke. Fred’s hand on your ankle tightens and he pulls you so you’re back is flat to the couch. Quickly his body is on yours, pinning your wrists to the couch at your side.

“Is that true baby? Are me and Auston not satisfying you? Not fulfilling your needs?” he murmurs eyes locked down at you. His chest presses into you, the air around you shifting. You try to swallow, but your throat is dry being starved of saliva.

“Pretty sure he asked you a question princess.” You didn’t even notice but Auston moved across the room, his mouth is millimeters from your ear.

Tilting your head slightly, you feel a hand on your jaw holding you in place, forcing your gaze up to Fred. You aren’t even sure whose hand it is until you feel the leather bracelet brush your neck and immediately know its Auston.

“What do you say man, should we take her to your room? Show her how good she has it,” Fred doesn’t pull his eyes away, while his comments are fully directed at Auston. Another display of his dominance over you making the slick between your legs build even more. “Make her regret even mentioning thinking of him”

You practically can hear the smugness oozing off the man beside you, only answering a quick but firm, “yes.”

Fred’s body is off yours as fast as he was on you. In an instant he easily throws you over his shoulder, carrying you down the hall to Auston’s room. Once back on your feet they begin to remove your clothing. Fred on your right, Auston on your left, both sucking on your neck working in unison; articles of clothing littering his bedroom floor, leaving you in just your matching underwear. If it wasn’t for the two hot bodies pressed against you goosebumps would be popping all over your body.

Auston unclasps your bra, sliding his tongue along your collarbone. Fred sucks on your neck when you hear fabric ripping, your underwear being torn off of you. Fred smirks against you, knowing you have been on them for all the shredded underwear they have left you with over the last three months, but neither seems to care.

Auston’s hand makes work of your breast, massaging and pinching the nipple. Gently rolling it through his thumb and index finger while Fred manipulates your legs apart, thrusting two thick digits inside of your folds. The unexpected nature causes you to whine while both men chuckle against you.

“Most women would be happy to have one man and you have two” Auston murmurs.

“Let’s make sure she never thinks about him again,” Fred sneers. Your head falls back and you begin to moan louder, his fingers quickly thrusting in and out of you. Auston’s other hand roams your back, sliding down to your ass, giving you firm squeezes to roll your hips forward further onto Fred’s digits.

If it wasn’t for both men on either side practically supporting your entire body weight, your knees would buckle. Fred pulls away slightly to get a better look at you, to watch you fall apart over his fingers. Your gaze meets his and his pupils are dilated, black with lust.

Increasing his fingers, thumb finding your clit you know you won’t last much longer. Incoherent thoughts are all you can manage, whimpers and curse words falling from your lips.

“Hear how wet you are princess?” Auston’s mouth is pressed against your ear. One hand cupping your breast his other firmly squeezing your ass. “Freddie’s hand is coated because of you,” he mumbles, you head a chuckle from the man on your right.

“This is nothing,” Fred asserts, but before you can process the weight of his words your orgasm crashes over you. Knees trembling, walls fluttering; blood pulsates through your body causing you to groan loudly.

As soon as you come down the boys release you and you almost fall over. Walking like a newborn deer on ice, you make your way to the bed while both men quickly strip. There must have been a silent exchange because Auston is quickly sitting in the middle of the mattress pulling you towards him.

Your back is to his chest and you can feel his hard erection pressed into your back as he brushes your hair aside exposing one side of his neck for him. “How many do you think it’ll take princess?” he hums his voice soft in your ear. “How many until you can’t even remember Josh’s name anymore?”

His words go right to your core, vibrating through your folds. Your chest heaves and your body shudders thinking of his statement. You know the question is rhetorical, but even if you had a number it wouldn’t be enough.

Fred stands at the end of the bed, eyes switching between yours and the slick dripping between your legs. Every time his eyes drop they stay a little longer, licking his lips at the sight. You begin to feel like a piece of meat and both men have been starved of food for weeks. You move your legs to close them, but Auston’s hands quickly grip your thighs holding you open for him.

Fred shakes his head while Auston rasps, “you know better than that princess,” in your ear; digging his thumbs into your flesh. Your entire body shivers and you take an uneasy exhale, knowing you are in for it. Quickly Fred crawls onto the bed, making his way towards your heat while someone, you aren’t sure who, bends your knees. Fred places soft kisses on the inside of your thigh and knee. The thought of what he will do has you dizzy. Flattening his tongue he licks up the mess from before, your entire body jolts but Auston firmly grips your legs open holding you is place.

“Such a good girl,” he mumbles as Fred laps up all your juices. A few more licks and Fred thick fingers find your heat, curling back inside you “taste so good hun” he adds.

Throwing your head back against Auston’s shoulder you groan “fuck,” but all it does is give him a better view.

“Look at you taking Fred’s fingers,” Auston hums as you feel Fred’s mouth attach to your clit. Auston’s voice is hot and heavy, Fred’s fingers hitting your g-spot with every thrust and soon your second orgasm is building deep inside you.

“Oh fuck,” you hiss while Fred’s tongue circles your clit, swirling in a figure eight on a continuous loop.

“You gonna cum again princess,” Auston says in your ear. “Coat his face?”

Incoherent sounds fall from both sets of your lips. You’re so wet that the obscene sound of his fingers fucking in and out of you makes your entire body heat up. Between both of their sinful mouths, Fred’s attached to your cunt and Auston’s whispering a string of filth on your ear, you are right back on the edge. Your heels dig into the mattress and it’s only a matter of time. Auston’s mouth purring in your ear, Fred’s tongue carefully circling your clit is more than you can take.

Your second orgasm rolls through you, little fires exploding in your hear. Fred slows slightly to draw it out while Auston holds you firm against his chest and you tremble in his embrace. His dick twitches against your back watching as white spills out. You sag against Auston’s chest, body tingling as your juices coat Fred’s face.

Pulling away from your heat your fog begins to settle. Fred has a dark smile, his beard coated in your slick heat. “What do you think does she need one more? Or should we fuck her ‘til she can’t walk anymore?” Fred says to Auston.

“She definitely needs one more,” Auston replies, hands digging harshly into your thighs keeping them spread apart.

“Ungh,” is all you can whimper in response, closing your eyes to take a few uneasy breaths while your legs relax, falling back to the mattress.

There must have been an exchange between the two or maybe you are still coming down from your high and don’t hear the question, but you do hear Auston say, “all you man I’m really enjoying the view.”

A hand is on your throat pulling your face away from Auston’s shoulder. Next a pair of lips are on yours, in a hot and hungry way. Immediately you know it’s Fred; not from the facial hair but the taste of yourself on his tongue.

Fingers are thrust back inside you, but your groans are swallowed by Fred’s mouth. Auston throws his calves over your shins, keeping you spread for his friend while his hands trail up your body. One finds your breast, the other finding your clit, thumb concentrating on pressing harsh circles into it.

Your pussy quivers at the contact it all becoming a lot. It’s almost too much. And then you feel Auston’s mouth on your neck and you know its game over. Being sandwiched between these men, fingers and tongues all over your skin has you pulling away from Fred for some much needed air.

“Holy fuck,” you moan, your eyes rolling into the back of your head, beads of sweat are rolling down the valley of your breasts. Your scream gets ripped from your throat and your vision goes white, wave after wave of euphoria rolling through you. Both men groan as your warmth spills around Fred’s wrist and onto the bed.

“God you are so beautiful when you cum,” Auston groans in your ear.

“Bet Josh would never make you feel like that,” Fred mumbles, finally pulling his fingers from you. Grabbing your jaw he forces your mouth open, shoving his fingers inside for you to lick clean. You have barely caught your breath and almost choke, but quickly work to clean your slick from his finger.

“Fuck, baby, just like that,” he purrs. Pulling away he lands beside you on the mattress, Auston quickly crawls out from behind. Falling backwards landing on the mattress, Fred brushes your sweaty hair from your forehead mumbling something to you in Danish.

Before you can react Auston in between your legs, hands on the back of your ankles pulling you closer, his throbbing tip pressing against your entrance “Remember the word,” Fred asks.

“Yeah,” you barely manage to say, throat incredibly dry.

“What is it,” Auston asks, waiting to continue.

“Yellow,” you manage to whisper through some uneasy breaths.

“You okay,” Auston asks, and you turn your head to stare up at him with a nod, tears resting in the edge of your eyes.

“You have to say it,” Fred says softly.

“M’okay” you say smiling at the softness of the two men, no matter how dominant or aggressive they are they always make you’re okay.

With that Auston thrusts inside your walls, Fred’s handiwork providing an easy lubrication so he gives you no time to adjust. Snapping his hips he sets a fast pace eyes dark and staring between your legs, watching his thick cock slide in and out of your sopping cunt. Pulling your bottom lip through your teeth you whimper, warm tears now rolling down your cheek.

“Just be thankful he is letting you off easy by being on top,” Fred winks rolling onto his side gently pressing his lips into your shoulder.

Wrapping your legs around his waist he snaps his hip, “figured she could use a minute,” he grunts. “But only a minute,” his hands are on your hips and he forcefully pulls you back increasing his pace causing you to cry out.

“Y/N,” Auston calls forcing you to whine as your head turns. “I think you should say thank you to Fred for taking such good care of you earlier,” he nods down to Fred’s hard member resting beside your hand. You honestly don’t think you could do much even if you tried, but when you slowly turn to meet Fred’s gaze he smiles at you.

“It would be nice if you said thank you skat,” Fred mumbles, sucking on your sweet spot beside your ear. Reaching out you wrap your hand around his length giving him a few slow tugs.

“Faster baby,” Fred mumbles, his words vibrating through your body. You try to set a fast pace, but Auston quickly has you distracted. Every thrust is hard and deep, brushing your g-spot before he pulls back. He knows exactly what he wants, each thrust calculated as he drags his cock along your walls. Every time he pounds into you your hand stutters around Fred’s length, but he’s loving it, smirking against your neck.

Each time Auston hits your g-spot you squirm and he is getting off on it. His eyes getting darker and darker, a grin tugging on his lips a little more each time. Fred continues to pepper your collar bone with kisses before working his way down your chest and back up again. His mouth is everywhere when his thumb attaches to your clit.

“Fuck Fred,” you jolt from the contact.

“Pretty sure it’s Auston making you feel this good,” Fred mumbles in your ear. “He’s the one with his dick buried inside you right now.”

Every statement is accompanied by harder faster circles on your bundle of nerves. Nails gripping your hips harder, cock sliding in and out faster. “He feel good baby?” Fred hums. “He feel good stretching you out? You’re taking him so well, you gonna cum all over his cock?”

“Fuck she’s close,” Auston announces as if you and Fred didn’t know. Releasing your hand from Fred’s cock you feel your body erupt around Auston’s dick.

If you thought the first three were intense, the fourth is pure fireworks. Every extremity is tingling and you feel lightning bolts erupt inside. Your walls flutter and both men groan as you disintegrate under Auston, melting into the bed. Neither man stops and soon you are met by Auston’s sticky warmth flooding your walls. He grunts and slows his hips, a few shallow thrusts and he spills everything he has inside you.

Fred pops his head up and looks towards your cunt, watching his friend coat your insides white. Momentary confusion crosses his face before turning back to you. Apart from the first time which Auston didn’t mean to, he has never once spent inside of you. Always spilling on your ass, tits or sometimes thrusting his cock inside your mouth so you can swallow it down. He doesn’t know when you and Auston fucked last week you told him can doesn’t need to pull out. He doesn’t know how every time over the past three months you have a moment of disappointed when Auston pulls out of you. How you are excited for your pussy to overflow with a mixture of both men’s cum.

Auston pulls out and falls beside you and Fred’s face softens. He smiles at you, a smirk tugging on the corner of his lip as he takes in your face. Absolutely fucked out and flush, hair a mess, splayed across the bed, makeup likely smeared down your cheek. Licking your lips you pull Fred’s face down for a searing earth shattering kiss.

Your hand tangles into his roots, his thumb drawing circles just below your ribcage. Tongue sliding into the others mouth and you tug harder trying to pull him on top of you but he doesn’t budge. Instead he falls onto his back pulling you on top of him.

“We all can’t go easy on you,” Fred winks while adjusting you over him. A mixture of sticky white fluids spill out and onto Fred while he lines himself up.

“Got one more in ya princess? You gonna cum for Freddie like you did me?” Auston asks and you shake your head, body barely functioning at this point.

“Oh baby we all know you do”

“Umph,” you mewl as he easily pulls you down, Auston’s cum spilling out around his girth.

Your hand quickly lands on Fred’s stomach, his abs covered in a thin layer of sweat. Your breath hitches when he bucks his hips while you try and take a minute, slowly grinding your hips, trying to compose yourself as best you can.

“Cocks not gonna ride itself,” Auston chortles from beside you.

Your eyes go wide and Fred smirks, shooting you a wink, you start rising and dropping around him, Fred bucking his hips to press deep inside you. Feeling his tip almost in your belly a slew of curse words fall from your lips. With every thrust you can feel more of Auston’s cum spilling out. A part of you thinks Fred thrusts up and pulls your hips down so harshly to fuck it out of you, but either way you are heading back towards the edge.

“That’s right take me deep baby,” Fred praises his back arching off the bed slightly.

You can tell he is enjoying watching you squirm above him. Your overly sensitive cunt barely able to take any more. Luckily the time you spent with your hand wrapped around him earlier means his high is close too.

“You’re taking me so well, baby girl,” Fred praises.

“You gonna cum for him like you did for your me, huh? Milk his cock for all it’s worth?” Auston asks, drawing your gaze to his dark brown orbs. You had almost forgot Auston was there, you are barely able to focus on Fred the pound driving up into your cervix let alone the man beside you catching his breath.

“Mmgh, I don’t… I don’t think I can,” you keen helplessly into thin air.

“Yeah you can, princess,” Auston urges gently.

Auston sits up pinching your nipple and you hiss from the friction his hand is causing, mouth grazes along your throat, his mustache brushing it ever so slightly. You don’t need him, Fred’s cock driving into your throbbing pussy with every thrust. Fred will get you there, but Auston’s mouth on your neck, hand on your nipple sends you catapulting over the edge.

Fred’s hands dig into your hips and Auston’s arm catch your body as you tremble above his friend. Auston spews filth in your ear, Fred mumbling Danish praise below you, but you hear none of it. Vision whiting out, ears filled with a high pitch ring as Fred fucks you through your high. Wave after wave of ecstasy overwhelms your body, Fred gives you a few more sloppy thrusts before painting your walls white. The two men support you while Auston slowly lowers you onto Fred’s chest while you catch your breath.

Auston leans on his elbow beside you, brushing your hair drenched with sweat from your forehead. Both you and Fred are breathless, clammy with sweat as his dick softens inside of you.

“So you learn to keep other guy’s names out of your mouth,” Auston sneers .

“I was obviously joking,” you groan while Fred brings a hand up to lightly draw on your back.

“Wasn’t very funny,” Fred adds.

“One Andersen is more than enough,” you try to push off of Fred put he tightens his grip wrapping his arm around your back, pulling you back down to his chest.

You hear Auston’s feet on the wood floor, and he returns a minute later with some water and a damp wash cloth. Fred gingerly lifts your body, sliding his cock out as some cum spills out. Once off him, Auston hands you the glass and Fred the towel who gently wipes between your legs while you whimper from the contact.

Auston having found some boxers, pulls a t-shirt over your head and pulls you back into the bed with him. Lying on your side you curl into his arm, using his tattooed bicep as a pillow, your hand lying on his chest. Fred crawls in behind you, hand on your hip, warm breath on your neck.

You hear the click clacking of Felix’s nails on the wood floor as he gets closer. The bedroom door finally open, he lets himself in jumping onto the bed and curling up between your legs and Auston as you all quickly fall asleep.

[let-me-luve-you]

Overlooked and Overworked

Tom Holland x Sister

Summary: Being Tom Holland’s little sister was great growing up, but after his success she’s a little left behind. Y/N Holland is willing to do whatever for her family because she loves them.

Warnings: Angst, fluff ending, rude Tom, overworked, sleep deprived

A/N: I don’t think Tom or any of the members of the Holland’s would allow this to happen to any member of their family or friends, I just had this idea and wrote it. Also I wrote this back in like January and just now got the guts to post it!

MASTERLIST    BUY ME A COFFEE

The past couple of years for you have been an emotional roller coaster. You’ve been so excited and happy to see your brother succeed in his career. It’s always fun to see him on the big screen as someone else. But it’s also been tiring and sad because you feel left out. You don’t get to go to set often, you don’t get to travel with him, and you aren’t a part of his charity. The Brothers Trust is just him and your 3 other brothers. Given you help out way more than all of the brothers. Since you went to school for business, you help your mum and dad with both of their businesses and then run The Brothers Trust.

Tom is the oldest, then it’s you, the twins, and then Paddy. You’re only a year and a half younger than Tom. You were very close growing up, but once he started doing movies, you slowly grew apart. Him and the twins then grew closer. You loved him dearly but it just wasn’t the same since you never felt included. He took Harry to sets with him and on press tours. Sam would join along when he wasn’t working at the restaurant. Paddy would join during school breaks. But every time you would try to join him, he would say no. That he was too busy or too tired. You didn’t want to fight him but you were always crushed.

When he got the role of Spiderman, he decided then he wanted to move out into his own apartment. You offered to help him find a place since you had been looking for yourself. You offered to share a place and split rent but he said he wanted to be completely on his own. But shortly after he moved into his new 4 bedroom apartment, he had Harrison, Tuwaine, Sam, and Harry move in.

“The twins are moving in with Tom. Can you help pack and move them this weekend?” Your dad asked.

“What? They’re moving in with Tom? I thought he wanted his own space?” You asked him.

“He said he wanted to be around people because it was too lonely and quiet. Did you ever find a place? If so, you may want roommates too.”

“No I realized I can’t afford a place in a nice area to live alone. All my mates have moved off to continue their education or they have jobs else where.” You said sadly.

“Tom should of asked you then. I’m sorry y/n/n.”

“It’s fine. He hangs out with all four of them all the time. I would of just been in the way.” You said as you got up and left the room.

It’s been a couple of years and you still can’t afford to get your own place. Between helping run three businesses, you don’t have time to get a part time job. You pay your parents for rent and help pay bills so you are doing adult things. Plus it helps your parents financially. It’s busy season since your mum is picking up gigs for photoshoots, your dad is on tour for standup and his new book, plus you are planning a movie event through the trust as well as trying to get all the merch bagged and shipped. You have been working 14-15 hour days for the past 3 weeks without a day off. You are feeling the tiredness mentally and physically.

Tom has time off from the movie he is filming now. They gave him a month off for the holidays. Him and Harry have been home but all they have done is hung out with friends and go to the pub. You have been holed up in your office/bedroom for 3 days straight. Only to go out to the bathroom and kitchen to grab food.

“Where has y/n been? I haven’t seen much of her since we got home.” Harry asks Tom.

“She might be finalizing the Spies in Disguise event and getting things ready.” Tom responded.  

“Oh good. Y/n is great at getting a head start on things so I’m guessing she’s done with all the prep and souvenirs.” Harry smiled. Tom laughed in response.

On Christmas Day, you only came out of your room for breakfast and lunch and then went back in your room to work. No one noticed the bags under your eyes that you tried to hide with makeup. No one noticed you almost falling asleep at the table. No one thought twice about why you spent most of Christmas alone in your room. But you were behind. You still had a lot of orders to fulfill and send out. You still had get all of the souvenirs together for the event that was in two days. You still had to finish sending out your dads orders for his book as well as finalize his January travel plans and stand up dates. Your mum had booked 12 more shoots and you had to finalize times and dates. And everything was supposed to be done in the next week. You finally caved and decided to ask Tom for help since it was his event after all.

“Hey Tom can I have you help me out for a little bit?” You asked him Christmas evening.

“Do you need me tonight?” He asked.

“If you can that would be great.”

“Sorry y/n/n. I can’t. I’m meeting to boys at the apartment.”

“Well maybe they can help too.” You sounded hopeful to get more help to lighten your load.

“No can do. We have drinks and plans.”

“Well then can you come tomorrow morning or early afternoon?”

“Can’t. I have a meeting with my manager to discuss everything that’s coming up and then all of us at the apartment and Paddy are going into the city. Maybe I can help you after the event?”

“No it’s okay. Don’t worry about it. I’ll handle it.” You said sadly as you turned to go back to your room.

“What about Paddy? Or mum or dad?” He asked.

“Paddy has football that mum is taking him to before she does a shoot tomorrow. Dad is working on some other stuff for his January shows.”

“Sam or Harry?”

“Well both will be with you tonight and tomorrow.”

“What about in the morning?”

“Sam has to work remember. And I think Harry is meeting with some mates to catch up with them or something along those lines. It’s fine. I’ve got it handled. Have fun tonight and tomorrow. Be safe. Love you.” You turned and almost ran back to your room. You wanted to break down in tears from being overwhelmed and for not being included in any of Tom’s plans of hanging out and catching up. You’ve barely seen Tom in the past year. Only when he’s in London. You shook the thoughts of your brother out of your head and pulled out a sheet of paper. You wrote down everything that needed to be done. Then on your white board, wrote them down in most important the least important.

First up was getting all of the brothers trust bags done. You went to the storage closest and pulled out everything you would need and set the boxes on your bed. Then you went and grabbed a tote to put the finished product in. It took you until 4 am, but you finally finished putting them together. You went into the kitchen and made you some tea. You went back in your room and marked the brothers trust goody bags off of your list. Next you started finalizing plans for your mum. That just involved organizing times and dates. You finished that around 1030 am. You marked that off the list as well.

Before you emailed all of the clients their dates and times, you went to the kitchen to grab and snack and drink. Your mum was in the kitchen.

“Morning love.” She smiled at you.

“Morning.” You said back waiting on your tea.

“So I’m going to drop Paddy off at football in 20 minutes and then Tom will pick him up to go into the city. I have to go to my shoot. Do you have the invoice I can give them?”

“I do.” You rushed to your room and grabbed it from a folder then went back and handed it to her. “Everything is on there. The deposit has been paid and it shows that as well as the price for the shoot and the editing. It also gives the timeline of when they will get the pictures.”

“Great. This is wonderful. Thank you. Also the theater called and said we can set it up today at 3 pm. Are you okay to handle that on your own?”

You sighed but answered, “yes I can handle it. I finished the bags last night. I just need to print off the papers to put on the seats as well. Plus get the itinerary finished which I will have by tonight so Tom knows what’s going on.”

“That’s great. I’ll be there to take photos as well as Harry but the boys will all be busy with fans and making sure they all feel special.”

“Sounds good. Have fun on your shoot.”

Your mum smiled as her and paddy left the house. You went back into your room and emailed everyone for your mum. Then you printed the brothers trust sheets that said what the event was supporting and how we were thankful for their donations. As those were printing you forgot you had to pick up an order of pictures so Tom could sign them for the guest coming to the screening. You looked up and saw that it was 130 and if you were going to be on time you needed to leave in the next 15 minutes.

After you loaded the goody bags into your car, you drove the 20 minutes to the print shop to pick up the pictures. You then went to the theater and set everything out. It took 45 minutes to lay everything out and make sure it was perfect. You then snagged some photos for Instagram and posted them. By the time you got home it was just shy of 5. You went straight to your room to finalize the itinerary. At 8 pm your mum knocked on the door.

“Hey baby. I’m back. How did everything go setting up wise?”

“It was good. Took longer than expected but wasn’t too bad for being the only one there. Also here is the itinerary for you and dad. I also have one for each of the boys.”

“Wow. This is detailed perfectly.”

“It kind of had to be since Tom has an event to go to tomorrow night and he can’t be late. I figured the more detailed, the less things can go wrong.”

“Fair point. Love I’m not sure if the boys notice the work you put in, but I do. Have you slept yet?”

You looked at her shocked, “what do you mean?”

“I mean that I can tell you are exhausted. I woke up at 2 am last night and heard you in here and saw your light was still on.” She paused and looked at your long list on the white board. “And by the looks of it, you have a long to do list. Do you need help? After we get through the event I can help. I don’t have a shoot for a couple of days.”

“I appreciate mum, but this list needs to be done by then. And everything you can help me with will be done already. But thank you.”

“Did you ask your brothers to help? I mean this is there thing. They should be helping you. Not leaving it to you to do yourself.”

“I asked Tom to help so I could have him do the goody bags for tomorrow but he had a guys night with Sam and Harry and them last night. Then they were all busy this morning and then went into the city. But it’s fine. I did the bags last night. That’s what you heard when you woke up.”

“I’m sorry baby. I’m going to have a talk with him. Have you had a break to just hangout with Tom. I know it’s been a while since you’ve seen him.”

“No he’s always in a meeting or with the boys. But if Tom wanted to see me, he’d make time but when I try, he can’t. But with all this work, I haven’t really done much outside of this room in a while so it’s fine.”

“It’s not fine. You both used to be so close. Almost like you were twins. Weirdly enough closer than the twins have ever been. I hope you two can work whatever this is out.”

“Me too mum. Me too.” You looked at her as she slowly walked out.

After your mum left the room, you got back to work finalizing your dads stuff. Thankfully it was only 12 am when you finished. Deciding to pack all of the orders so you can drop them off to be shipped in the morning, you went and grabbed everything you would need from the storage closet and got to work. You stayed up all night working. You finally finished all the orders at 9 am. When you realized the time you rushed to get dressed and cleaned up as best you could. By 10 am you were out the door to go to the post office to ship the orders and then you were off to the theater to make sure everything was set. By 1pm the rest of your family showed up. And by 2 the theater was full of people who were excited to see the brothers and the movie.

People knew who you were. Everyone knew Tom had a sister. But you did great staying out of the eye of people. None of your brothers posted much about you on social. Your dad mainly posted about Tom and the brothers golf adventures. Your mum would occasionally when she made you model when she was trying something new. So when people arrived, they walk past you and straight to the four brothers who were ready to greet everyone.

When the event started, you weren’t really needed so you went to a back room they had set up for your brothers to relax away from people and sat on the couch. Not sleeping since Christmas Eve was starting to catch up with you but some how you forced yourself to stay awake.

“Y/n we have a problem.” Your youngest brother said as he came in the room. “The movie hasn’t started yet and it was supposed to 15 minutes ago.”

“Okay I’ll go see what’s going on.” You went to the manager of the theater and she explained to you how the light in the projector went out and it was going to be another 20 minutes before it started. She apologized multiple times.

“Hey Tom. Can you do a q&a for 20 minutes or so?”

“No the movie is supposed to be on.”

“They are having technical difficulties and it’s going to take 20 minutes to fix it.”

Tom got annoyed because he knew this was pushing the entire timeline back and it was now be pushing it for him to be on time for his event tonight. “Sure.”

“Thanks. I’ll let you know when we are good to go.”

After 30 minutes. The movie was finally ready to go. Every one was enjoying it and all four of your brothers moved around the theater so the kids felt like they were watching the movie with them personally. When it was over everyone was ushered into a lobby where there was a meet and greet with photos. By the time the boys were done with everyone, it was 20 minutes until Toms next event.

“Great. I’m going to be late. Thanks for that y/n. Why didn’t you have them check everything yesterday?”

“Because I didn’t think of it.”

“So stupid. How could you not think of it? It’s literally the first thing on the list of things to check when prepping the theater. Do your job better. Thats what you are paid to do. I’ll see you later.” Tom rolled his eyes and stormed off. You just stared feeling humiliated since the theater staff and your family had witnessed that. You were holding in your emotional breakdown until you could do it in private.

“Sorry guys. Y’all can go ahead and head out. I’ll clean this up and bring home whatever is ours.” Sam, Harry, and Paddy saw this as a get of jail free card and booked it out of the theater. Your dad came by and kissed you on the head and said I have to finish up some work and headed out. Your mum looked at you sadly.

“I’ll help you baby.”

“No it’s okay mum. Go edit the photos so we can get them sent out.” You smiled at her.

“It’s okay. I can do them later tonight.”

“Mum seriously. Go home. I got this. I’ll be home later. You kissed her on the cheek as you walked back in the theater. You thankfully left the tote yesterday which made it easier to put everything in. You put the tote in your car and headed back in the theater to sweep and clean up the mess. By the time you got home, it was 9 pm. You had been up for 61 hours straight. You were exhausted. You just wanted to sleep. But Tom was home and he was livid.

“What the hell?” He asked.

“What?” You asked back.

“You know I got yelled at by my manger for 30 minutes about how I was irresponsible and immature for being almost a hour late to the event tonight?”

“Why did you get yelled at? You were doing stuff for charity. He should get over it.”

“He was mad because SOMEONE told him I would be done with our event in plenty of time to go to this other one. And when I told him there was technical difficulties because that same SOMEONE didn’t do their job, he got even more mad.”

“I get that I probably should of checked but things happen Tom. Okay? Things I can’t control. Things the theater can’t control. I did this entire event by myself. Sorry for not checking but other than the delay the people loved it and we raised money which is okay because our charity now can help so many more.”

“You didn’t do this by yourself. We all help. And our charity? Our? You mean mine? Sams? Harry’s? Paddys? It’s our faces that make that charity. And when something goes wrong we are the ones that look bad. Not the person behind the scenes that only does some of the work.”

You looked at him like he was a stranger. What he said broke your heart. That’s what he really thought? You just shook your head lightly and walked to your room. You shut the door and locked it.

“Really Tom?” Your mum asked as her and your dad walked in during the argument.

“Yeah mum. We do all the work and she’s trying to take the credit. We’ve all noticed and it’s getting out of hand. You do more than she does.”

“Tom I’m extremely disappointed in you right now.” Your dad said.

“Tom she does all of the work. The planning, the scheduling, the packaging, social media, distributing the money, and figuring out all the ways we can make money to help those smaller charities.” Your mum added.

“She does?”

“Yes Tom. On top of helping me and your father with our businesses. We’ve seen you more than her this past month because she’s been so busy.” Your mum said.

“Wow.”

“Did you know she was up until 4 am on Christmas night so she could finish the goody bags before we had to prep the theater. That she had those pictures printed so you could sign them for the guest. That she made an itinerary so detailed that nothing could go wrong. Except she didn’t account for technical difficulties. She set up the theater and cleaned the theater all by herself. None of us helped her. We just showed up for the event.” Your mum said.

“Tom have you not noticed how exhausted she looks? It looks like she hasn’t slept in days. She’s trying her best to handle everything so we can have everything run smoothly for us. She even mentioned your event and how she needed to get you out of there so you wouldn’t be late. We’ve all been horrible to her by letting her do this by herself.” Your dad said.

“I... I didn’t know. I’m going to go talk to her.”

Tom got up and knocked on your door. He couldn’t hear anything so he tried opening it. He noticed it was locked and went to his old room and found the key you gave him years ago. When he unlocked it he noticed the mess around your room of boxes, plastic, mail bags for packages, and stacks of papers. He saw you on your bed and saw you were asleep. He went over and tucked you in. He went to your desk and saw the white board with everything marked off under the to do list. He then looked on your desk and saw how your mum and dads plans were finalized. He knew you mentioned everything when you asked him for help Christmas night and now you were done with it. Even all the orders were done and he saw the receipt from the post office proving the orders were shipped. He felt horrible knowing the only way that you got everything done was by staying up all night.

He turned and walked back to you and finally noticed the bags under your eyes. As well as tear stains that he knows he’s the cause for. It broke his heart knowing he was the cause. It also broke knowing that you asked for help so you wouldn’t fall in the deep end, but by saying he couldn’t help, he pushed you in and watched you drown without even realizing.

He gave you a kiss on the head and got up and quietly walked out.

“What time did y/n wake up on Christmas Day?”

“From what we know, maybe around 8 or 9.” Your dad said. Tom sat there quietly while doing the math in his head.

“61 hours.” He suddenly said.

“What?” Your mum said.

“61 hours. That’s how long she went without sleep. She asked me for help and told me why and I said no. She’s finished the list. She’s organized both of your stuff. She’s packed and shipped out all of the orders. She did everything for the event. She hasn’t slept. She’s asleep now but it was 61 hours. How could I let my sister do that? How did I not see it?” Tom asked his parents. They looked at him in shock.

“My poor baby” your mum said.

“We will talk to her tomorrow when she wakes up.” Your dad said.

“I want to be here when she wakes up so I can apologize. I’m going to go see her again.”

He got up and walked to your room. He quietly started cleaning up the mess left from packaging orders. He then laid on the other side of your bed thinking about how he messed up so bad. Shortly after he fell asleep too.

-——————

Around 7 am you woke up still exhausted but you needed a glass of water. When you went to throw the blanket off of you, you saw Tom asleep in your bed still in his clothes from the night before.

You were confused as to why he was in your bed, but you chose to ignore him. You stood up and went to the kitchen. Your mum was already cooking breakfast.

“Morning baby. How’d you sleep?” Your mum asked.

“Alright. I’m probably going to catch a few more hours. Just needed water.” You said. “By the way, do you know why Tom is in my bed?”

“He felt bad about how he has treated you lately.” She said. “He figured out you went 60 something hours without sleep.”

You looked at her shocked and sat down. She came over and gave you a hug.

“Why did you do that to yourself? Why didn’t you ask for help?” Your dad said as he joined both of you in the kitchen.

“You were working on new stuff. Mum had shoots and a house to run. I asked Tom and thought maybe him and the boys could help but they had plans. It needed to be done before the new year and definitely needed to be done before the event.”

“We appreciate you so much baby girl. I hope you know that. You do a lot for this family and this family isn’t great at giving back. We do love you.” Your mum said as she gave you a kiss on the head. “Now please go get some sleep. Sleep all day if you’d like and I can bring you food later.”

You smiled at her and walked back to your room. Tom still hadn’t moved. You sat your water on your bedside table and crawled back under the covers. You turned your back towards Tom. You were still really saddened by his words last night, that you didn’t want to face him yet.

“Y/n/n are you awake?” You heard Tom whisper.

“Go back to sleep or get out.” You said back not opening your eyes.

“I’m sorry y/n. What I said last night was wrong. I didn’t realize you do everything for our trust. I thought mum and dad did it all. I know you’ve been killing yourself to try and catch up then get ahead, but you can’t do that to yourself. You need proper rest. I’m going to make sure you never do the 61 hours straight again. I’d rather myself do it before I let you do it again.”

“Tom it’s okay. But seriously. Leave or go back to sleep.”

“No it’s not okay. I’ve royally fucked up. I’ve let us get so far apart we are almost strangers to one another. I have a charity that doesn’t even have your name on it and you do all the work. You make sure my fans are happy as well as making sure we help other small charities. You’re absolutely amazing and I’ve treated you like shit for the last few years. I don’t even give you the time of day. I promise you this, I will do better. We will be like we used to. Even if I have to kidnap you and take you with me different places. I love you and I don’t want to be the one hurting you anymore.”

You rolled over and looked at him with tears in your eyes. Your brother finally recognized you for you. He finally realized what he’s done.

“Thank you Tom. I love you too.”

He smiled at you and leaned over to give you a hug and kiss on the forehead.

“It really means a lot that you said that. But can I please go back to sleep. I’m still exhausted.” You said.

Tom pulled you to him so your head was on his chest and shoulder. And he cuddled you so you felt protected from all the horrible things that can go wrong for you.

“Get some sleep and when you wake up, me and you will hang out. Just the two of us.” Tom said. You smiled as you drifted back to sleep.

[ladystrallan]

The Great Season 2 Thoughts (part 3)

Spoiler warning for episodes 7 and 8!

Episode 7:

- Peter meditating lol

- Grigor/Marial is the definition of thanks, I hate it

- I don’t know how I feel about Catherine’s mother

- When their science competition entry is a roller coaster

- Are they taking back asexual Orlo? :(

- I don’t really like the teacher girl either

- Tatyana wants to be George so bad and it’s hilarious

- The return of Catherine’s rash

- When he actually caught the cake on the tray my jaw dropped

- Not Joanna hitting on Peter lol

Episode 8:

- Joanna with the peanut allergy

- “That story didn’t bother me” wtf Grigor do you not love your wife anymore???

- Can George beat up Marial when she comes back?

- ‘Digging of the graves’ sad but kinda funny?

- Public birth sounds like one of the most embarrassing things in the world

- Marial, don’t even THINK about marrying Grigor

- Joanna is low key mean

- Don’t blame Aunt Elizabeth for her son drowning :(

- Those candles are kinda suspicious

- Not Archie watching people fuck lol

- Peter the Great!!!

- I knew it about the candles!

- Velementov is so excited about war it’s funny

- Omg when Joanna fell out of the window

- They were about to kiss when her water broke!!! Catherine/Peter ftw!

More thoughts coming soon!

[princess-yuna]

Help Me (Din Djarin)

Pairing: Din Djarin x Reader

Rated: PG 

Warnings: Contains spoilers of the last episode of season two, so please be caught up with the series before reading this. This has a lot of hurt, but there is also comfort at the end. It’s a roller coaster of emotions!

Summary: The Mandalorian had to give up his foundling, and he is desperate to feel something else.

Word Count: 1,034

A/N: I wrote this at 3 AM this morning because I was listening to some soft piano ballads to help me go to bed and they made me feel a type of way. I started crying when I was writing this. Merry Christmas! 

A gasp escaped your lips as he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to him as his face went to the crook of your neck. His lips brushed against your skin, peppering sweet kisses affectionately. Your heart swelled, feeling like it would explode out of your chest. 

“Help me,” he whispered, his voice coming out strained. His emotion hit you like a ton of bricks, not expecting those words to come from him even when you should have expected it. The moment he had come back empty handed was when you knew that everything would change.

He surprised you when he stepped foot into the room that you stayed in while you waited for him to return. It was too dangerous for you to go with him, so you stayed where he left you. The days started to blend together as you tried to keep yourself busy to not think about him or the child. He had left you where he had known you would be safe because he couldn’t stand the thought of someone harming you. 

You helped the beloved frog lady and her husband when they needed assistance of some sort because it kept you busy. Busy was good when you wanted to get your mind off of missing the beskar wearing Mandalorian and the little baby that you have grown fond of. When it was time to lie your head down, you always hoped that they were fine out there. Having no communication pained you, but you knew that they would be back. So, when he returned with the child, your heart knew that it would be hard from that point.

The kid was gone, and you desperately wanted to help, but Mando told you that you couldn’t go. Hearing that small broken tone made you know that he couldn’t bear the thought of losing you too. You agreed to stay back even to keep his mind at ease, but your mind went a million miles per minute. An uneasy feeling went through you, feeling a strange disturbance that made your heart sink. There was a lot of sadness felt and you didn’t understand why it came so suddenly.

Everything made sense when he came back and the baby wasn’t with him. “I have fulfilled my quest.”

He had never sounded so... Defeated.

You felt the ache in your chest, but you knew that it was for the best. The child was with his own kind to further his training, but you felt sad. That little creature became your child, and you were aware that Mando also adopted him even when he didn’t want to admit it out loud. The bond they shared was greater than the bond you had with the child, but you knew the separation must have hurt Mando more. He was quiet. He didn’t know what to do when you asked him what was next. What was there to do now?

And then he took off his helmet.

The notion was overwhelming to you, your hand was on your mouth as you stared at him with wide eyes. Tears started to sting your eyes as they clouded your vision, feeling the reveal was too overwhelming on top of losing your child. “Mando, what are you doing?” You were in complete disbelief as you stared at him, watching as he put the helmet down on the table beside him as he made his way to you. Your feet kept you rooted at where you stood by the bed because of the shock. 

When he stood in front of you, he didn’t hesitate to pull you in close to him. The gasp slipped from your lips and the tears fell down your cheeks the longer he held you. “Help me,” he had whispered. He needed to feel something else rather than the loss. You were the one who brought other emotions out in him and he needed to feel those other things. 

“Okay,” you spoke softly, your head tilted to the side slightly as you continued to look at him. You have dropped your hand back to your side as you looked at him with a curious gaze. “How can I help?”

The hold on you loosened as he gently pulled back from the embrace so he could look at you. His gloved hands moved up to your cheeks, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. You looked at him. You really looked at him and took in his appearance because you wanted to remember every single detail. Before you could make a move, his lips were on yours, which caused another sound of surprise leave your lips. Your eyes closed as you kissed him, feeling as if time was standing still. The feeling of his lips had been something you dreamed of. You didn’t expect them to be so soft. For a man who had red on his hands knew how to be tender and inviting, which you never expected. 

When you pulled away, you were both breathing heavy because of the emotions that coursed through both of you. With a heavy sigh, his eyes remained closed as he pressed his forehead against yours. The notion felt even more intimate when it was skin to skin, which made your cheeks go warm. You heart thumped fast in your chest as you breathed with him, matching his cadence and relaxing into it. 

He knew it was going to be okay when he had you by his side. “I love you,” he whispered faintly. You heard the words so clearly even when he was so quiet saying them. They were words that were never spoken, but the feeling had been there for a long time. They were words that he couldn’t tell the child out loud, but it was known through the force. Here, with you, he could say them. He didn’t want to go another day without letting it be heard.

“Say it again,” you whispered back, the smile spread on your lips. You just wanted to embed it into your memory that Din Djarin was in love with you like how you were in love with him.

He didn’t say it, but he kissed you instead.

[iculyrea]

One Last Lap

well the time is now, so enjoy my first story (: I have picture of what it would look like so let me know if you want them (:

The idea of retiring came from him constantly being away from his family, watching his sons grow up and getting into hockey just like their father and watching his six month old daughter grow up was getting to him. Any time Sid was home he would soak up all of his time with his kids. Rather it would be helping his kids put on their school uniforms to picking them up at school after practice just to get some extra bonding time with them. He really wanted to spend more time with is his daughter because she was their first daughter but also the last child him and y/n would have. Eventually he made up his mind and told the team and close ones about this season would be his last season. Some people were surprised while others understood and were sad. As usual he wanted to keep it private and when he was ready, he would make an official statement to the media and the fans. The opening night game went well for them and won against the Flyers. This would be the last first home game of the season for Sid and he made sure that he would enjoy it all and remembering every little thing. He was happy that you, Alexander (10), Bastian (8), Marcos (7) Iliana (6 months) were there at the first home game of the season. Cheering him on while the boys had their father’s jersey on and Iliana had a Pens onesie on with a black and gold bow on her head. He was a proud father that his children are able to see him do what he loves the most. This season was probably one of the best seasons for the Pens and most memorable for Sid. Which would make saying goodbye to this lifestyle and friends and fans a bit harder for him. As the regular season was coming to an end Sid was secretly getting a bit emotional because he knew things were ending soon. He was happy but also sad. Luckily, the Pens made it into the Stanley Cup Playoffs which gave him even more time to spend with his teammates as they prepare for the first round. The excitement was fun for the whole family, Alex and Bastian would stay up a little later during the away games if it was on a school night. In the morning they would tell Marcos what happened and talked about the game on the way to school. Hearing the boys talk about their father made your heart so happy. Not only did it make you happy but also Sid too. This was one of the things that you knew you were going to miss once Sid retired. After clinching the champion spot for the Stanley Cup Finals Sid made the decision to announce to the world that he is retiring after this season. “After playing many years of playing the sport I fell in love at a young age, I have decided to retire after this coming season. It is with a heavy heart to know that I will not be coming back to PPG Paint Arena this coming fall. As well as not seeing my second family that I call my team on a daily basis and the friendly staff and employee’s when I walk in almost everyday. Also not seeing the most passionate fans that we have here. I have had a good hockey career in my life, and I am lucky that my children have been able to see me play. The boys are sad that their dad isn’t going to be on tv anymore but happy that I will be home more. I will be able to spend more with Iliana and scare away any boy that comes near her. Mostly, spending more time y/n and watching our kids grow up and support their dreams like our parents did for us. This wasn’t easy but I felt like my time on the ice as come to an end. It has been a crazy roller coaster and I am thankful for everyone in my life who has joined me during this part of my life. I will always been a Pittsburg Penguin and now it is time to focus and bring back the Stanley Cup to Pittsburg one last time.” The news came to a shock for everyone in the hockey community and the sports community too. You and Sid got numerous messages, phone calls and emails, even gifts about his retirement. Everyone supported him and his decision, even the fans were okay knowing that their captain was hanging up his skates at the end of the season. It made every Pens fan have more excitement and passion for the last round of the Stanley Cup Finals.  The Pens were playing against the LA King’s. The Kings won against the St. Louis Blue while the Pens won again the Capital’s. The Pens were down one game so game six was in California which took place on the weekend. You wanted to go because this would be Sid’s last away game even more so last play second to last playoff game. You decided to take all of the kids to California, to support him before game 7. You told the boys to pack their bags for the weekend and they were so excited to see their dad play in California. The game plan was to pick them up from school early and head to the airport. The flight was about five hour which gave the kids time to work on their school work then relax. All three of them were playing hockey in aisle together while Iliana was on your lap looking at the window. (they are in a private jet cause why not) Once yall arrived at the airport you and the kids headed to the hotel and stayed there for the rest of the evening knowing that tomorrow is a big day. Sid didn’t know yall were coming at all so this would be  a complete surprise to him seeing yall at Game 6. Once you arrived at the stadium and got settled in the suite, and the kids had their jersey’s on along with Iliana in a Pens onesie and waited for the puck to drop. Once the puck dropped everything was happening so fast, Sid was doing amazing and playing with so much passion. Y’all both knew that time was cutting short for him. He played his heart out and everyone in the stadium knew, even the fans knew that were watching back home. The amount of energy he had playing was rubbing off on the rest of the team. Halfway through the first period still scoreless but no one was going down without a fight. The shots on goal were slowly getting higher and higher, if the Pens lose then game 7 is back home. Second period came and finally someone scored on the Pens team. The boys and Iliana were happy and cheering on their father. You were taking all of this in because you knew this was also the end too. A few minutes later the kings scored which made you nervous. Sid was getting nervous too, but he knew he had to push on with a positive mentality. As the second period ended and it was tie, everyone in the bench walked off the ice on edge. Sid for some reason decided to look up and he saw all four of his children with the biggest smile on their faces. They even made a sign that said ‘’ GO DAD WE <3 YOU’’ and for Sid it made him happy knowing his family was there supporting him and his team. As the third period started, the kings put another point on the board. Things weren’t looking to well for the Pens, however they still fought hard but ended losing which meant game 7 was back home. You took the kids down to the dressing room to go meet Sid. Alex and Bastian were sad that they lost but Marcos happy that game 7 was going to be home cause he said the food at the arena was better back at PPG Paint Arena than here. Sid was happy to see all of yall and thankful that everyone could come. Of course, Sid was upset but he knew he had one last chance to get it right at home. That was the only thing he was thinking on the way back home along with the rest of the team. Winning one last Stanley Cup for Sid was going to mean just as much as the others. The following couple of days everyone worked harder on the ice and during work outs. They were ready for game 7 just as much as the fan were ready. Finally, game day at PPG Paint Arena, Sid was about to leave the house and all of the boys hugged him for good luck and kissed you before he left. He got to the stadium earlier than normal, this was it. The last game he would play. It was there were mixed emotions for him and everyone, even for the staff. He didn’t want this to distract him from playing his heart out. The stadium had special rally towels for game 7 and for Sid. It was the calm before the storm, everyone was wearing gold and black and went all out. As you arrived with the kids, everyone was coming up to you and the boys asking how everyone felt about Sid not playing anymore. You said it will be a big adjustment for everyone but of course you would be sad. The boys were sad because this is the life and atmosphere that they grew up in and Iliana was also getting use to it but didn’t understand much. They would even ask for signed hockey sticks from other players as gifts. The other players children were practically liked cousins to them. You even were looking back at taking Alex to his first game and first playoff game. Alex was taking it the hardest that is why he is playing hockey to be like his dad.  As everyone got settled down in the suite and Marcos being happy cause the food is better. The boys brought more signs and wore their father’s number on the back, same with Iliana. Sid was focused and was ready to play one last time with his team. The puck dropped and the Pens were in control. The passes were clean and crisp, everyone was communicating with each other. Boom first goal of the game was scored by Sid, they were up one to zero. The atmosphere was crazy, everyone was cheering and screaming. You were excited to watch Sid as if it was the first time back when yall started dating. You were mesmerized and anxious too, the boys were cheering and screaming too. Iliana was happy and dancing on your lap which made your heart melt. Halfway through the first period the Pens scored again. Everyone felt good but didn’t want to get comfortable. As the first period ended Sid saw the signs that yall made and couldn’t help but smile. The signs said “ ONE LAST TIME FOR US DAD” “BRING THE CUP HOME” “LET ILIANA SIT IN THE CUP”. Second period started things were still going well. The kings scored which came out of nowhere but that didn’t stop the energy. Halfway Sid scored again which made it 3-1 but again no one was getting comfortable. Once the second period ended and both teams left the ice. Sid  stopped to one last time to look at the signs yall made and made him happy again, he laughed cause Marcos had nacho cheese on his face. Walking out of the dressing one last time was sad for Sid cause he knew that this was it. He had one amazing career and this last 20 minutes was going to be the longest 20 mins ever he had ever played. The teammates were already telling him his goodbyes along with the coaches and staff. Third period started and it was a race against the clock. The Sid scored again making it 4-1 that quickly changed to 4-2. Sid kept fighting and skating as fast as he could. There was fire in his eyes because he wanted to bring the Stanley Cup back to Pittsburg as he said goodbye to his hockey career. The 20 minutes turned into the last 5 minutes of the game. You took the kids down the ice level to celebrate with him along with the other families. As the final buzzer buzzed, everyone went crazy. They did it, they won 4-2. Sid was as happy as could be. All the boys ran on the ice towards Sid to hug him. You and Iliana walked careful but met Sid you guys halfway on the ice. Tear were in both of yall’s eyes. You and Sid both looked at each other with happiness, Sid said “ No don’t do that..don’t cry because if you cry I’m going to cry and you know how much I hate crying at work” you couldn’t help it. Neither could Sid, he was so happy and emotional that tv reporters kept the cameras on him. There was not a dry eye in the stadium, just like tradition on winning the cup. Sid took one last lap with the Stanley Cup above his head. People were chanting “One more year” but he knew that this was the only way to end his hockey career. You and S, the boys and Iliana took pictures. Sid took the kids around the rink so he could do one last lap with them too. He was giving the fans one last look before walking off with his family and Stanley cup. .

[lorddistancebarry]

Forest In Chains - Chapter 1

"500, 600, 700, 800, 900.." Garcello counts the cash in his hands after he was given the bag of money. After Tabi fell and didn’t get back up from the half-giant cutting loose and throwing him through the cage into the left most stands of the audience. After the red haze cleared. After basically running with fire and panicking the entire way. He still feels the burns and cuts on his arms, chest and face from Tabi's strikes. The bruising deciding to make itself known by the numbness hidden via his bangs on the left side of his face. The wounds just adding on in a pile especially when the reaper decided to stop fucking around and went all in... his body shivers as the pain compounds and the wind from the September season hits him while he sits on the bench waiting for the bus.

"You barely von that, child." a deep, voice spoke.

Garcello looks up and looks intrigued and surprised at who it belonged to.

"Ruv.." He noted looking up from his money and putting it away, quickly.

"You did not expect me?" He noted with a smirk,"Illegal fight, legal fight. I come to all, vatch them. Sarvente spoke of it being good move. I believe her."

The large Russian man walks over and sits down like a neighbor to Garcello on the bus stop. "But, I can go on many years speaking about her." Ruv noted,"Vhat about you, Young Smoke? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Garcello admits,"Just.. didn't expect to get cut and burned alive like I'm a fuckin piece of meat."

"Equalizers are not to be trifled vith. As gang or as fighters in vrestling circuit." Ruv chuckles,"Go to be undefeated, An equalizer gets sent, test you. It is cycle to see if you are actually good or you are veak bitch."

"Well, was i actually good?" Garcello laughs wryly,"Cause i feel like shit."

"No, you vere lucky, you use your strength. You are shit, but vorkable shit. Trainable." Ruv critiques as he takes out his vodka flask from his jacket. "So.. you're going to train me?" Garcello asked looking up as Ruv drinks. "Vin against Agoti or Vhitty." He directs looking to Garcello stoically,"Then I teach you. I vant to see if your are vorth time."Ruv takes another drink from his flask. Garcello takes out one of his cigarettes and lights it. A green light illuminates at the end as he inhales, steam and smoke coalesces and flares outward into a glowing green, mist smoke hybrid. "I see." He nods once,"And if I am worth your time?" "I train you.break you, see vhat you.. really are. Then ve progress from there."  Ruv stated looking to Garcello with his lone, glossy eye. Almost seeming to look through Garcello and into him.Garcello shivers looking back. Friend? Enemy? "I see." He gets up as the bus is rolling up."Well for now.. I'm gonna get dinner and go home. Thanks for checking up on me." "Anytime. I do not like promising student, be jumped by Equalizer scum." Ruv chuckles with a grin. Garcello pales a bit, "Uh... what?" Ruv looks to the fellow titan with an incredulous stare,"You scraped out vin, but you also humiliated Tabi. Young Reaper vill vant revenge..." The Russian raises an eyebrow,"You did not expect that?" "But you beat some of the Equalizer's asses and you didn't get  jumped!" Garcello points out as the whir of steam leaving the bus' brakes occurs and the door's open. "That is because of grace of God and grace of throwing truck across street." Ruv laughs wryly,"Now go, child. Before you are stuck here." Garcello waves Ruv off before getting on the bus and using his bus card. A satisfied beep of payment as he moves. Knowing the timer, he sits down quickly before the bus moves with a hiss of the breaks lifting from the ground and the bus hovers, flying down the roads and over ground locked travel.He looks out the window at the night sky and at the many lights below of Funk City. Advertisements, cars, city signs, street lights. Garcello lets his mind wander at the light pollution and the sound of hover cars flying by. Its mesmerizing. Watching everything just fly, zip, and zop by. Time could pass as the colors of the city and the energy takes him in. The concept when he was young had never gotten old or changed. The colors of the world, the lifeblood of the people moving, growing and just living. This is why he and his mother had migrated here. Such a decision had to be lived through not just decided on a whim. But this.. This wholesome peace and tranquility at this time. Away from the violence, the darkness and the weight of it all... Was a very big deciding factor. "One day... they will be able to feel this way.." Garcello resolves quietly as he looks down through the window to the city below. "Feel so.. free..." He coos starting to let the pain and tiredness get to him. Starting to fall asleep on the bus and get complacent in his space... until a growling, gurgling reminder makes itself painfully known in his core. The tender flesh of wounds on his abdomen only make it worse. His body went through hell.

It wants food, it needs it. He needs it. NOW. "First.... step... free myself." he grumbles softly as pain burns in his core and it forces him out of falling asleep and dragging on. Sitting up properly and starting to search for a close enough bus stop so he doesn't just add more suffering with a long as fuck walk that only lengthens the burning. Finding one, he pulls on the wire that signals the automated system to stop. The bus stops after a bit before landing with the soft 'woosh' of steam. Getting off the bus, he walks down the streets. Looking up to keep track of his own placement on the road, looking down to light a cigarette to ease some of the pain, looking back up now to search for those heavenly golden arches. After a minute, 6 cigarettes later.. the yellow and red light beams down upon his form. At this point, a soft, barely noticeable film of red covers everything and everyone that walks by and every sensation, smell and taste is heightened. Painfully so. "Finally..." he exhales, dry air hitting a watering, near drooling maw. He walks into the restaurant with a dragging motion of his feet. Garcello looms over to the counter with barely any real patience. People move away and those that don't, go quickly about their order then move. "Hi." he stated, "I would like.. the whole left menu. Twice. Add 6 McChicken meals. Super size it..." "I-is that-that all sir?" A timid female voice asked quietly. "Yes.." he confirms. Not really looking up. "It's going to be disc-discounted. Y-you don't mind right?" She asked.As she asks that, the red film sight as it was dies down a bit. Garcello looks up from the counter. There is only one person that ever asks about discounts in his mind. He looks at the attendant at the counter and sees the fuchsia and sky blue eyes looking up and right back at him from her gaunt, modest face and shivering, small frame. "Rebecca? What are you doin' here?!" He asked actually in shock. "Um.. well.." she shrugs,"I work here. Y/N got me the job, t-they're the manager." Garcello looks on in shock. He tilts his head back with an incredulous stare. Looking for you and seeing you wave a short, polite wave as you're working with the drive through attendants to ensure chaos is handled. Garcello looks back to Rebecca. "Don’t give me a discount girl just charge me normally. I'll treat ya." He says softly. "A-are you su-sure?" "Entirely." He nods handing over 80 dollars. "You were c-close but a bit over. Your price is 72 dollars and 12 cents." "I know." He nods,"Tips. Put the change in your pocket." Rebecca looks sheepish, looking down and shivering."B-but.." "Do it." He commands sternly. Rebecca takes the money, makes exact change and keeps it immediately. Every motion is fast and shaky like an unstable roller-coaster. "T-thanks..." she murmurs shyly poking her fingers together. "When are you two off?" He asked. "In.. 30 mins.." Rebecca looks up at Garcello. Her eyes narrow and she grimaces.."I'll get an ice baggy.. and. I'm going to be frank... I have questions. And if i have questions.. Y/N is going to want answers..." Garcello grinds his teeth,"Alright. I'll wait and we'll talk." Rebecca purses her lips then exhales,"Thank you." Garcello leaves from the counter and to one of the large benches at the furthest back of the restaurant and waits. Waiting, letting time pass as he patiently sits. His core burning with hunger and primal thoughts when the mental shock subsides. The herd is curious.. tell them. "I.. don’t want them in danger..." Lies are over... tell them something... they worry. They fear. "Garcello? Are you good?" You asked concerned, "Rebecca told me about.-" "The bruise on my face. I know." Garcello says as Rebecca comes over with the food trays. "Ice bag, 3 o clock?" Rebecca offers the baggie of ice. Garcello looks to it then takes the bag, wiggles up his cap and bangs, revealing the recently closed gashes, burns and cuts on his chin and face. Your eyes widen from the sight, brow furrowing in concern. "What h-happened?" Rebecca says before you do. You see Garcello is staring at the food, half listening. Mostly tired, dragging on fumes really. "No." You say then look to Garcello,"We talk. After you finish eating. Got it?" "Yes'm"  Garcello nods once then  finally let's his brain drop being alert.Rebecca looks to you with concern, she shakes more from anxiety. "Oh.. don't worry I know." Your reassure,"But overwhelming him is the last thing on my mind. I don't think this is a simple little 'fall' like last time anyway." "You want to h-hear it fro-from his mouth." You nod once and sit down before looking to Rebecca, she nods once with a small smile. "Both of us are signed out, we wont get in trouble with higher ups for over time."She confirms just before- CRUNCH! TEAAAR! SHHRRIIP! Garcello eats like they aren't there, there is no smacking noise. Just an absence of control from tiredness and physically going through hell. Hes going through hoops with food like a functioning sponge with water, trying to replenish what was forcefully squeezed out of him. Rebecca looks to you. "I.. haven't seen him like this.. or well this bad.. Do you think hes..." "I think so." you confirm," Maybe on drugs. But regardless of whatever it is... This cant be swept under the rug. Did you call Annie?" "I-I did." Rebecca nods,"She's coming as fast as possible. I warned her to not run red lights. I was promptly cursed out in German. I responded. She hung up knowing I was right." Garcello stops eating into his 6th McChicken. The man didn't unwrap the wrapper off, the whole ass sandwich is just getting murdered with his teeth. The devouring however stops short at the mention of Annie. With bloodshot eyes, he looks to Rebecca and you. "You.. are all going to be here?" he asked and you shake your head no. "No." You respond,"But. I'm happy you have a brain in there again. Because like it or not.. you're going to tell us what we need to know." Garcello pales in the face for a moment like he saw a ghost, his heart races in terror. His pupils contract as he knows hes cornered now. There is no wiggling out like before.

"We aren't g-going to hurt you, big guy." Rebecca coos softly. "I.. i know its jus'..." Garcello starts but its hard to put words together. "You know you can't bullshit us anymore." You finish looking at the man directly in his face. Garcello looks away looking down at the scraps of paper, unwrapped or just ripped apart making a mess on the table. "Yeah.. I cant." he confirms as Annie rampages in like a crashing tsunami and yells just as loud, scaring customers out of the restaurant. "NOW WHOMST THE FUCK JUMPED GARCELLO?! I'M ABOUT TO FUCKING BEAT THEIR SHIT IN!" Annie yells, her flesh is tinting blue from the glowing blue of her veins spidering from her skin. A sign of her stress before she drinks ‘the liquid’. "You bout to calm so i can explain." Garcello says strictly, unafraid as he’s been used to seeing the entity pour our from her veins and skin. He’s more than used to being attacked as he knows it doesn't like him. But for now it has no power here. Just like his other half. "Then talk." You egg on, as Annie takes a few breathes, grabs a chair and sits in it, the back of the chair acing the table."We're all listening." Garcello bites his lips. His S/O and his best friends, the core of the herd, his herd... now are looking at him like hes wounded. Doesn't help that he is on the outside and inside... ‘Now you gone and done it, Garcy.. but now.. what do you do now?’ He asks himself in his thoughts as he takes a deep breath in. Act as you are, You are alpha. Time to be a man.

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom, season 3 episodes 3-6 thoughts!

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-johnny was actually pretty civil with danny and left when he asked! thats nice. also, SKULKER?? HAD A FRAMED PICTURE OF EMBER?? oooo fuck wait had they established they were a Thing Before?? I dont think so. thats weird. its like that country boy/goth girl meme lmfao. I think i am going to choose to ignore this new info and pretend I didnt hear it. 100% unrelated to the jazz/ember fanart I already drew and posted....😳

-LADIES NIGHT EPISODE THIS IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. wish it didnt really center around the guys or them being pissed at them, but. willing to bet this was written by men lol

-THEY ERASED ALL THE MEN??? meanwhile, jack and danny are fishing at. silent hill or something. im glad jack is trying to read a parenting book and making an Attempt. (theyre at lake erie, but, they made it actually eerie...thats fun)

-the girls alt outfits...cute. EMBER MADE A NEW SONG TOO!!! kinda. jazz being one of the backup singers and being AWFUL. NOOOO

-'how are we going to get kitty to blow a kiss?' 'she'll have to think there are still some males in town!' ...i dont know how to break it to you, but I dont know that a 100% het girl would wish for all men to Begone. I think. I mean im not a het or a girl so I dont really know for sure. she Is probably Bi tho. esp having the other ladies in town chanting NO MEN!!! excitedly............(then again, the kiss is to get Rid of men, so, she probably would have blown it at the ladies only if they were actively trying to attack/stop them, so...I MEAN. THE DRESSING LIKE DANNY BIT WAS SO EXTRA)

-I feel like an all female cast ep couldve been way way way way cooler than that was. like. why was it still somehow all about Men. ...anyway. (where was valerie...)

-next ep opens with the observants, and, way way more of them than I expected...existed? I mean I guess them being a council/jury of some kind is what I expected from their first appearance (bc at that time they were basically TELLING clockwork to kill danny, not asking,, so I figured they had SOME kind of authority) but. there were so many. anyway, here goes vlad! letting his own hubris go brrrr. releasing a weather ghost for political gain! #justvladthings

-okay say what you will about him (he IS an asshole) but having an umbrella with his own face on it and more prepared to share is SUPER FUNNY. and him being fanned by huge wads of money by his bodyguards. SO ineffective but so Dramatic. He UNDERSTANDS that if youre rich you need to be. you know. obnoxious and kinda eccentric about it! fuckign hate when rich people are boring about it. I would trust vlad with nothing except to not be a boring rich asshole who wears...fucking khaki or some shit. man knows his Presentation Skills. and that 'V' chair in his mayoral office. is that fucking embroidered?

-maddie get your MAN PLEEEEASSSE. IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER. the way jack stays simping for this man. in FRONT OF HIS WIFE!!!! ...my god its like a love triangle. jack clearly loves vlad, who loves maddie, who loves jack. jack fenton is at the very least bi, right................. this is an OBSESSION . 'THE V MAN COMETH'???? i...my god. (also, on a serious note, to have a friend THIS SUPPORTIVE...and still be SUCH A DICK TO HIM (TRYING TO KILL HIM AND STEAL HIS WIFE??) NOT COOL VLAD. JACK IS YOUR 1 AND /ONLY/ HYPE MAN. if someone loved and supported me THIS HARD...LIKE. CMON DUDE.

-STOMP the fucking GAS, JACK

-this would make a great shirt design, looks like a metal band design! we love The Maelstrom

-oh, so vlad did in fact get a mansion in amity park. and its purple! good color choice! not as flashy as a CASTLE or MURDER CABIN, but still pretty eccentric, which I appreciate.

-...vlad knows the difference between picasso and da vinci? in the ep last post where we were watching him fail at conquering every historical time ever he didnt seem to know history well enough to like. be effective...was vlad taking art history at college?? (was he an art MAJOR??? we never DID KNOW WHAT HE WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. I kinda assumed business because in the masters of time ep he was still rich without ghost powers so he had to have..known something about business or something, right...but also, art and or theater FITS HIS PERSONALITY. possibly also something science-y, I guess, but I always felt like he got roped into that, esp how pessimistic he was about the ghost portal in the flashbacks to college, like, i felt like he was just there for maddie and was uninterested/un-invested at the time...)

-THIS GHOST JUST ELECTROCUTED MADDIE (THE CAT) BITCH!! THATS MY FAVORITE MADDIE!!! vlad going after vortex and being ~shocked~ .....WHEN. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN. THAT YOUR ACTIONS. HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!

-the way this random man with a camera sees the mayor laying in an alley covered in TRASH AND DECIDES TO TAKE A PICTURE HAHAH

*snap* this ones going in my cringe compilation!

-vlad 'if we're going to defeat vortex, we're going to have to do it together!' *immediately dips after dropping danny off in front of vortex* JKASDFHKJHJKN

-DANNY CAN DUPLICATE!!! ...he couldnt even attack with it, but he DID IT!!! INTO (4) OF HIMSELF!!! SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

-'THE ROLLER COASTER EMOTIONS OF A TEENAGER THREATEN MY PLANS!' ...0 self awareness of his own dramatic moodiness. incredible, how dumb this man is. its very close to circling around to endearing, if he was less of an asshole. at least its very very funny to see danny shooting him with tiny lightning bolts anytime he's even slightly irritated! vlad you should be nice to danny anyway. this is what you GET

-...making sandwiches and ice cream and playing video games with your nephew is a totally normal thing. WHY is vlad acting like this is the end of the world. if you were a GOOD UNCLE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE DOING THESE THINGS!!! bitch I make my nephew food all the time and dont forget what he does and doesnt like. if u didnt know danny didnt want tomatoes, thats on u. if u, a grown adult, are gonna piss of the 14 yr old by not letting him win, u deserve to have to pay for the arcade machines he ruins because he now has uncontrollable storm powers because YOU THREW HIM INTO A FIGHT WITH THE STORM GHOST. fuck u vlad. paypal me $400,000 while ur at it tho. (also, gamer vlad confirmed)

-VLAD CAN COOK THOUGH???! I assumed he had...people working for him that did that. I mean. billionaires usually dont do that. then again, we've only seen those vultures working for him (and I guess the dairy king was AT his old mansion, but it was never really clarified if he worked there...I think he probably just Hung Out and they Enjoyed Cheeses Together. thats what I think, I dont think a KING would be working for anyone and also the dairy king was nice <3) but then again he would be a private person and we cant have anyone accidentally finding Ghostly Things, so...still, that's hilarious. pour one out for that really cute banana split that got ruined 2 seconds later

-vlad just fucking picking danny up and THROWING HIM AT VORTEX TWICE WITHIN LIKE A MINUTE. JUST ABSOLUTELY LAUNCHING HIM. BITCH THATS MY SON BE CAREFUL!!! HES GOT ORGANS AND THINGS!!!!

-danny seeing those animal commercials and feeling sad is the biggest 2000s throwback so far. i legitimately had to change the channel or walk out of the room when those came on bc id CRY AND BE SAD ABOUT THEM FOR DAYS AFTER. fuck those commercials and fuck that IN THE ARMMMS OF AN ANGELLLL song 😭

-'vlads ego almost got the town destroyed!' yes danny thats the entire episode. the entire series anytime vlad shows up honestly. this episode was just him being really embarrassing the entire time, and, me laughing about it. 10/10 would laugh at him again

-NEXT EP WE HAVE A SHAPESHIFTING GHOST?? I've said it before but shapeshifting is the power I would want when asked those 'what superpower do you want' questions...its the Best power! this guy looks like a homestuck character. ive never read homestuck but thats the vibe

-I love every time we see tuckers family, they are by far the most functional family. and dash has a lil chihuahua!!! named pookie!!! i am crying (I've had 3 chihuahuas, so I am very biased, but...) AND HE WATCHES THE ROMANCE CHANNEL WITH POOKIE. POOKIE I WILL DIE FOR YOU YOU SWEET LITTLE BABY.

-danny can lift a bus! I shouldn't be surprised, but i am proud of my son. hes got lil kid fans. i am going to cry about this

-JAZZ KEEPS A SCRAPBOOK WITH DANNY'S LIL HEROICS AND NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS!!! we've actually seen it on her floor before, but I didnt realize it was a scrapbook!! thats sooo cute.

-...and danny has to stand there listening to his parents saying danny phantom sucks and is a 'filthy ghost' and calling him egotistical...i am once again stealing their kids!

-THIS GHOST RIPPING JAZZ'S SCRAPBOOK!!! ILL KILL YOU. SHE WORKED HARD ON THAT!!! BITCH

-yes, maddie, the one with red eyes is For Sure Actually Your Son. ignore the, red eyes... (CLEARLY she hasnt watched the other 2 eps where danny has been evil, she doesnt know red eyes= evil!!!)

-'billy fenton'.......................

-danny being stuck as phantom in his own house, no way out is a fucking NIGHTMARE. his parents pointing giant weapons against him and SHOOTING AT HIM. THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE.

-NINE INCH NAILS POSTER.

-this is the most screenshot of all time

-amorpho turning into mr. lancer because hes 'someone no one will want to be around' BUT HES WRONG, I WOULD BEFRIEND AND HANG OUT WITH MR LANCER SO FAST.

-tucker dressing as danny, now I have the full Tucker set of him being sam and also being danny. also saying 'the ghost...uh...RIPPED MY FACE OFF.' and then running. SMOOTH. NOT AT ALL CONCERNING TO ANY PARENTS.

-sam accepts the toast from jack. and then 2 seconds later is like 'why am i eating this.' THIS SHOWS HUMOR IS SO UNEXPECTED SOMETIMES ITS REALLY GOOD. and then the scene after, mr lancer running into his ghost doppelganger and being like 'YOURE GORGOUS' THEN FAINTING. I AM CRYING. AND DASH FAINTING TOO.

-sam disguising herself as danny again to help tucker run from the fentons. but leaving him shirtless in the streets. incredible. 'plEASE DOnt NOTice MY FACELessNESS I MUST LIVE IN EXILE' this episode is destroying me the humor in this show is exactly my brand of corny and cheesy

-the impromtu story made up by danny and amorpho to explain stuff to the fentons. my god they are both such bad liars. but amorpho is a good egg. wish danny wouldnt have said he didnt wanna see him in town again!! I want him to be reoccurring. not that thats gonna matter since I'm almost done with the series, but the idea of this being the Only Time We See him is :(

-NEXT EP SAYS STARRING MARK HAMILL??????!!! hello ! mr . joker....mr. star wars.... I feel like I should be. idk. taking off a hat im not wearing in respect. I shouldnt be surprised tho bc hes in a lot of cartoons as a very good voice actor, and dp has already had a lot of talented ones so I've been looking out for ones I might know, but....mr. hamill....

-sam has her own greenhouse, names all the plants, and says thank you to them (in the languages from where the plants are from) whenever she harvests from them. thats SO cute. and her lil gothy lunch box...

-and danny's lil red fuzzy lined jacket!!! ive said it before but every time the characters get alt outfits im like :D

-danny has ice powers now!!! THATS WHAT FROSTBITE MEANT. HE KNEW SOMEHOW WAY BACK THEN

-THIS SHOW NEVER LETS YOU FORGET VLAD IS A BILLIONAIRE, HUH.

-danny's lil 'holy hibiscus!' first off the 50s batman swearing is hilarious. 2nd. my username is from the flower sanchoyo hibiscus, so, shoutout to ME this ep. hi :)

-EURGH UNDERGROWTH MAKING EVERYONE PLANT ZOMBIES. HIVEMIND PLOTS SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME. and this dude made the city SO overtaken so quickly like how long was danny asleep?? oh god

-evil fucked up sam! now the whole trio has gone evil at some point! the voice actress did a really, really good job with making her sound like a zombie...

-frostbite's paws are so so so big compared to danny. oh my god. i want to hug the snow dog...

-the far frozen has an advanced medical stuff!!! very cool. very smart snow dogs

-im so glad danny has a friendly ghost snow dad to explain this new power and teach him!!! this is so sweet. DANNY'S GHOST SENSE WAS A PART OF HIS ICE POWER?? OOOH. COOL. we love a training montage!!!

-danny saying if he cant defeat overgrowth, that he'd want to stay with frostbite...oh my god...do you think this is the first real supportive adult figure in his life (I am NOT counting his parents because they threaten him on the daily even if they dont realize it.) I mean mr lancer is a Teacher, but he was also nice but this is different, but this is a GHOST WHO IS WILLING TO HELP HIM with his powers and also will help him when hes injured and is so so nice and comparatively so much more mature than 90% of the adults in this show!!!! god. dad frostbite is my everything.

-the framing and lighting this episode, and all the angles...they went all OUT and it looks really really good. this is my nightmare scenario, tho. like, FUCK zombies and dead city zones and hivemind shit. and using the humans as 'nutrients for the children' i am going to THROW UP.

-MALEFICENT VIBES WITH THE HORNS AND GREEN EYES! this costume kicks so much ass. sam is now mark hamills daughter, I guess.

-danny's ice powers making his eyes blue!!! thats neat. and him going for the roots underground was SO SMART. i will not stand for danny ever thinking hes stupid, hes SO smart.

almost done with the show... :"( thats a sad thought!!!

[birthdaysentiment]

The music in wtFOCK season 3 - Song #33

Dinsdag 12.12 // "Young Gods" - Gabriel Rios

Episode 9 was a tough one to get through, because it seemed like there was no light in the darkness, no happiness, no smiles or laughter, only tears running down your cheeks as well as a broken and bleeding heart. Every clip was emotional difficult to watch (in their own way), as they were filled with heavy feelings and an atmosphere that created a sadness and a sorrow you couldn't help but get influenced by, and this clip was definitely no exception. This is properly one of the hardest scenes for me to watch, because it hurts so much to see Robbe breaking down, to see him come crashing down while he's letting all of his emotions out.

At this point in the episode, it had already been a roller-coaster of emotions, where the biggest drop had been Robbe sending a message to Sander, with the heart-breaking words "because there is no us". And even though I knew they would find their way back to each other, I couldn't help but feel lost in some ways, and so extremely sad for both Robbe and Sander. That's why I couldn't help but smile when Robbe send a new message to Sander, asking him to ignore the last one, because in the meantime Robbe had realized that he wanted Sander, that he only wanted him and that it was always going to be him. And I can't help but wonder if Robbe thought back to the promise they made to each other, that it's always going to be the two of them in every universe, and if that promise also had something to do with his decision about reaching out to Sander.

Robbe is waiting for Sander's respond, updating their conversation almost every second to see if there's any reply, but he suddenly gets pulled back to reality when his father calls him. And just by looking at Robbe's body language, you can see that this is a conversation he doesn't want or need to have, but as he walks to his room, he takes the call and that's when the pain begins; not only for Robbe, but also for us watching.

His father asks him if everything is still on for Friday, and at the same time a sadness runs through Robbe's body as he's being remined of it, not because he forgot about it, but because the dinner is not going to be the way it was supposed to be. And when his father makes a comment about booking a table for three people, it seems like Robbe has to take a moment to collect himself before answering the question, as his emotions feels overwhelming. Because the truth is that Sander isn't coming, and all the sadness and pain is just too much for Robbe to handle in that moment, especially the thought of them not being together in this universe.

Robbe has never been the person to openly talk about his feelings, but in that moment, he had to. After Robbe tells his father, that him having a boyfriend was a prank, he realizes that he can't do it, that he can't do it to himself or to Sander, pretending everything was a joke, when it was everything opposite of that. Everything he and Sander had was real and he couldn't just go back and erase that, delete every moment, every kiss and every touch they ever shared. Because ever since Robbe meet Sander, he's been feeling alive, and for the first time Robbe feels like he has found his place in the world, a place with Sander by his side. He can't pretend everything is a joke, because that would not only mean that everything between him and Sander has been a joke, but also the journey he's been on, how he went from hating himself to actually accept and embrace the person that he is. So when he tells his father that they broke up, it hurt Robbe more than he thought it would, because then he realized everything he had lost, that he might had lost Sander for good, the only person, who had made him feel real and loved, and that was just to many emotions all at once.

But when his father asks him, if he's okay, Robbe breaks down, since that was the final push he needed in order for him to let all of his emotions out, and in that same moment, the song starts playing in the background, where the soft sounds of an acoustic guitar fills the pace around Robbe. The melody adds another layer of pain and hurt to the scene, as the instrumental part of the song is filled with sadness and sorrow, making the whole scene almost impossible to watch. And once again the editing is spot on, because the song and its lyrics seems to follow Robbe's emotions, almost functioning as a symbol of them. For example, when the song begins, Robbe is on the verge of breaking down, and as soon as the lyrics gets mixed with the melody, he breaks down, crying and weeping, because in that moment it all became too much, every feeling just came to him at once.

It's one of my favourite scenes with Robbe, and even though it was heart-breaking to watch, I think it was a very needed clip, to actually see Robbe break down, so see that reaction from him. During season 3 we have seen Robbe in similar situations, were we have seen him broken, lost, sad and hurt, but we have never seen him like this, with tears running down his face, weeping, holding onto himself while he was unable to control his breathing and everything that was happening around him. This was a new reaction from Robbe, since we had been used to see him hold everything inside, but he couldn't do that anymore, it had all become too much, the weight of his emotions was pushing him down, overwhelming him, so in that moment he needed to get it all out, he needed to deal with every emotion, every thought he had been hiding and avoiding for so long.

I think there's a lot of reasons why Robbe broke down. Not only did he get affected by all of the emotions that came to him at once, when his father asked if he was okay, but I also think Robbe was holding back, that he wasn't really dealing with everything that happened after he found out Sander was bipolar. But the conversation with his father started a reaction within Robbe, because I think, somehow, in that moment, Robbe realized (or acknowledged) what had happened between him and Sander, that things between them might be over, or that he had hurt him by breaking the promise they made to each other. And I think the simple thought of losing Sander was enough for Robbe to break down, because that meant, that he had also lost a piece of himself.

It didn't come as a surprise that wtFOCK chose a song, that would highlight the sadness, the sorrow and pain in the clip, that the song would emphasize all of Robbe's emotions, making it impossible not to get influenced by them. Some might think that almost every sad song could be used in a situation like this, but there is something about this song, that makes the whole atmosphere feel quite different. Maybe it's the acoustic notes and the fact that the guitar is the only instrument you can hear, maybe it's the soft and quite beginning where small pauses of silence gets mixed with Robbe's crying, or maybe it's the soothing and calming voice that makes the moment even harder to watch, because it creates a contrast with Robbe, who's nothing but calm and in control.

No matter the reason, I think this song was a very good choice, especially since it connected so well with the scene. For example, how Robbe's crying seems to get worse as some of the calmness leaves the song, how he's pulling his hair and looking down while he's trying to control his emotions, as the melody seems to come down from its high. But also, how the song seems to get calmer and quieter as we leave a crying Robbe alone in his room. And even thought it was heart-breaking to leave Robbe while he was feeling so down, the song gave a small hope that the worst part was over, but that didn't change the fact that the image of a crying Robbe, with no one by his side, was a sight that would be hard to forget, a sight that would, once again, leave you in pain.

This was an intense clip to watch, because it made you feel everything Robbe felt, every emotion got passed on to you and there was no way of escaping them. After the clip ended, I think a lot of us felt a bit lost, not really knowing how or when some of the darkness was going to disappear, but as we all know the light came, we just had to wait a little longer for it. As I said in the beginning, episode 9 was a tough one to get through, and this clip was definitely one of the hardest, but somehow it also seemed like a breaking point, something that needed to happen in order for the light to come through, but the pain and suffering wasn't over, as we would learn a couple of days after, when wtFOCK managed to surprise us once again.