#( & of course everyone's interpretation of a muse is different! that's one of the things that makes rp so much fun for me. )

[erabundus]

good  afternoon!  i've  made  a  small  addition  to  my  rules  —  namely,  the  only  kazuha  i  will  be  shipping  with  is  @momijiba.  this  does  NOT  mean  i'm  no  longer  open  to  interacting  with  other  kazuhas  —  i  would  still  love  to  plot  other  kinds  of  relationships.  (  platonic.  antagonistic.  etc.  )  i'm  still  open  to  ships  with  other  muses.  i'm  just  not looking to explore  anything  romantic  with  any  kazuha  other  than  milla's.

[hyperfixat]

HI!! i have decided on a posting schedule for this fic!! once a month, every month on the 25th, i hope you look forward to it <3 due to someone asking i will have a taglist, so please leave a comment or ask (i won’t post if you ask me not to) to join. any comments or reblogs mean a lot, thank you all for the support i have received.

also, dunno if i mentioned; while the reader is intended to be inclusive toward everyone they are, in the canon of me writing them, bisexual. everything else is up to interpretation

< prev .. next >

** Written PRE 1.5 – Any mentions of new characters is pure speculation and or headcanons.

The Astral Express decides to stop at the Xianzhou Luofu first, then wrap things up on Jarilo VI. According to Pompom the train’s warp is near instant, so they won’t set for take off until the early hours of tomorrow.

Due to them being the first to offer, that night you spend in Caelus’ room. It’s pretty bare bones, an uneven mix of Dan Heng literally living in the archives and March 7th’s tasteful over decoration.

They offer their bed to you, willing to sleep on their relaxing-chair, but Caelus is the proud owner of a queen size bed. Long story short, their bed is large enough to share, and you do.

Initially you had fallen asleep on separate ends, but throughout the night, you migrated closer, making it so that when you crack your dry eyes open as the lights at Herta’s station turn on for the day, you’re greeted with front row seats to Caelus’ face.

After the initial fluster of emotions, you calm your body and mind and get ready to seize the day.

“So who, here, are we gathering up, again?” March questions you merrily, holding a hand out to help you off the express and onto the landing port.

“I hope everyone will still be here,” you muse, basking in the cool air of the flagship. “Will the Stellaron Hunters be here, you think?”

“Probably,” Dan Heng affirms, moving to stand next to you. You glance at him and smile.

“There’s Jing Yuan, Loucha, Fu Xuan, Bailu, Yukong,” you briefly consider mentioning Jinglui or Tingyun, but decide against it. “Yanqing, and of course Blade, Kafka, and Silver Wolf.”

“I doubt Silver Wolf will be here in person,” Caelus nods. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen her not as one of her fancy holograms.”

The six of you, the whole Express minus the conductor, casually walk through the scape of the Central Starskiff Haven, taking in the sights.

The weather (which is likely simulated) is nice and cool enough not to warrant you drowning in sweat. March 7th casually slips her arm through yours, tugging you closer to her. Your gaits are forced to be in sync, but you weren’t walking that much differently than her.

“Be gentle with them, March,” Himeko lightly chides. Her hand falls on your other shoulder, lightly squeezing.

“I’m fine, Ms Himeko,” you reply lightly laughing. “March wasn’t rough.”

“Oh? Well if it isn’t the Astral Express!” Jing Yuan is walking at your group, crossing the flow of walking traffic. He’s so much larger than the game made him seem; he’s taller and broader (especially in the chest) than his game model portrayed. His hair looks shiny and smooth, and you’re staring, aren’t you? Alluring golden eyes meet yours, “I don’t believe we’ve met.”

You don’t want to speak, too afraid you’ll make an absolute fool out of yourself in front of the General.

“Hey Jing Yuan,” Caelus, ever the angel, redirects his attention. “We need to have a meeting with you and a few others later on. Are you free this evening?”

“Hm?” Jing Yuan gives a distracted sound of affirmation. “Indeed, I am.”

The next person you run into is Master Diviner, Fu Xuan. The short pink haired girl (Fu Xuan in this instance, not March 7th) looks up at the commotion of your group’s entrance.

“The Astral Express and… friend. How can I help you today?”

Caelus and March help lead the introductions throughout the day and before you know it you’ve tracked down Qingque, Loucha, Sushang, and are now on the hunt for the hunters.

“Are we sure they’re here?” You ask after another detour down an Aurum Alley backstreet leads to nothing. “Could they be… I don’t know… at their secret base?”

Welt frowns, resting his weight onto his cane as he comes to a stop next to you. “We can only keep looking, as we don’t know where that so-called secret base is. If we don’t find them soon,” he sighs. “We will have our discussion without them.”

Your group resigns to having your meeting with the Xianzhou Luofu residents without the Stellaron Hunters.

Qingque listens to what you say with a blank, contemplative face, her hands fiddling with her Mahjong pieces, fingers rubbing the smooth finish. She looks at you when you move your gaze away, eyes watching you curiously.

“I know it’s hard to believe,” you finish off your mini-speech. “But, please, you all are vital parts of this world and its story, and I don’t know who else to turn to.”

Loucha has long set his coffin down beside him, letting the thing take up an entire chair’s space. Jing Yuan looks across the table at the blond man, “what do you make of this situation?”

“It sounds absurd.” The voice didn’t come from your table. You lift your head and look around the empty plaza.

“Silver Wolf?” When you utter her name, her hologram flickers beside you. She’s semi-opaque and looks down at you.

“You know my name.” Silver Wolf aprases you. “That does help prove your point, I’ll give you that.” Her gaze moves to a well maintained shrub across the way, “I think it’s legit, Kafka.”

“Kafka?” Jing Yuan’s eyebrow raises. At that moment her well maintained, elegant form slips out from the branches of the bush. She pulls out a stray leaf from her hair and nods at the General.

“How intriguing.” Kafka switches her focus to you, “if what you say is indeed true…”

“It is.” You say before you can stop yourself. Her eyebrow lifts at your eager reply.

Fu Xuan crosses her legs and stares harshly at the wine haired woman. “You are a wanted criminal on the Xianzhou Luofu.”

Kafka gasps, faux hurt on her face. Her hand lays over her chest, right where her heart is. “Imprisoning me would be against your better interests regarding this one right here.” She says, referring to you. “If Elio were to know of how this little one has come to our world, who would be able to ask if not me?”

“Silver Wolf could, no?” Fu Xuan bites back. When her gaze moves to where Silver Wolf’s hologram was though, she has disappeared. Kafka giggles softly.

“I take it that is a no,” Jing Yuan chuckles.

“A game…” Qingque muses softly. Sushang, seated beside her, nabs a lone Mahjong tile, flipping it in the air idly. “It’s so odd. I have a whole life of memories, yet you say I am only built to be a side piece for entertainment.”

You look down at your lap, face feeling hot with shame at ever evening playing Honkai Star Rail. It’s not like you could have known…

Madam Yukong hums, “while I am inclined to believe you, is there any proof you can offer us? Something you know that would otherwise be unexplainable?”

Loucha is silent in his seat. “How much do you know about us?” He seems troubled.

You think, wondering where the question came from at the same moment a certain cutscene comes to mind. Loucha was somewhere he shouldn’t have been and is carrying more than just a coffin laden with secrets around.

“As a general rule of thumb, I won’t be revealing anything possibly hurtful or incriminating about anyone here.” You sigh, a line of worry coming across your forehead. This is all a lot to deal with. “I… I will do my best not to infringe on any of your private lives.”

“Hey now,” March puts on a sympathetic tone and pets the crown of your head. “I’m fine with you infringing on my private life.” The words most definitely contain an innuendo that you don’t think anyone at the table failed to miss.

With pink cheeks Dan Heng says as well, “You have become somewhat important to me in the limited time we’ve known each other. I would not object to having a more private relationship with you.”

Rounding back to the Foxian’s question you address her. “I mean, yeah, I could tell you what I know of your lives, but honestly? It’s mostly trauma, and sad, sad things.”

Yukong takes a long pause, lips thinning. “I see. I will lend you my trust for now, though I wish to have a private moment with you later on.”

The whole table shares with you that you have no need to worry about forging bonds with them, and it makes you tear up a bit. “That’s very kind of you all, thank you.” Once the emotional moment has come and gone, you realize the absence of one key character.

“Kafka, where’s Blade?”

Her face, that remained unchanging for the whole duration of the conversation, falls slightly. “The Mara is harsh on him today.”

“Oh,” you’d almost forgotten about the Mara. The affliction that curses those who don’t die by it, leading Blade into an undying fate of misery. “I would like to talk to him and fill him in on me being here.”

“He will come and find me soon enough. Wait here with me, darling.” A warm feeling covers your face and chest at the pet name she gives you. Everything about this woman makes you feel crazy….

“Leave them alone with you?” March's tone makes it clear how much she detests the idea. “No way!”

Kafka pouts, eyes lidding as she looks over at the girl, “would you rather I take them to meet Bladie?”

Caelus calls your name, meeting your eyes considerately. “You played our world as a game, so you must have an answer to this. Do you trust Kafka to bring you no harm if we leave your side?”

Now that… it’s not like you’re alone in a desolate place with her. Screaming is always an option. The thought of spending time alone with her makes your heart beat faster and fills your head with its sound. You got sidetracked, imagining sitting side by side with the woman… rather you should focus on the question at hand.

“Yes.” It’s half true. You wonder if her Elio has given her orders regarding anyone from other worlds. Hopefully nothing like ‘eliminate them on sight.’

The Xianzhou Luofu and Astral Express crew bid you goodbyes, Himeko making a point to narrow her eyes threateningly at Kafka as she exits the pavilion.

Kafka drags a chair out next to you and leans on her elbows, gazing at you. You force yourself to maintain calm, even breaths, willing and praying for the heat in your face to dissipate.

The two of you sit there in silence for a moment.

“I wonder if Elio foresaw me coming into this world,” you muse, gazing into Kafka’s pupil-less eyes. The color, a captivating mix of red wine and magenta, doesn’t give away emotion.

“I doubt it.” Her words are floaty and smooth, “As much as I don’t want to admit that, but your existence seems beyond even Elio’s grasp of understanding.”

“Will…” those words send an uncomfortable feeling down your spine. “Will he be angry about that?”

“Who’s to say?” Though in her unchanging eyes you swear you see a hint of amusement. “Though the way you captivate the hearts and minds of everyone you come across, I don’t believe you to be in any danger.”

Well, at least you don’t have to worry about being nuked or anything at the moment. That’s a relief.

Occasionally making small talk, the sun sets on the Loufu as you and Kafka watch. It’s quite intimate for having just met today, but you find your head leaning on her shoulder, breathing in her scent.

While the sky is painted twilight purple, Blade finally makes his presence.

His gait is cool and slow and had you not known of his Mara-Struck status you would think he’s calm and relaxed. His red pupils dilate when he catches sight of you, and they flick over to Kafka where they stay.

“I am late.” He says, though does not apologize.

“Don’t worry about it, Bladie, I had plenty of time to learn about this little one.” Kafka rubs the back of her hand on your cheek, the rings unnaturally cool against your face. It envokes a rush of heat to your face, making you divert your gaze to Blade, who takes the seat next to you.

You’re caged in between the two most beautiful, cool, and awesome Stellaron Hunters. Breathe. Just breathe and don’t pass out or get a bloody nose, because that’d be so cringe.

Kafka’s laugh twinkles in the air like wind chimes at your reaction.

“Are you planning on staying with the Astral Express?” Blade probes. He traces the planes of your face mentally, taking in every detail that graces you.

“Oh?” Kafka leans across you to tease her… (dog) comrade. “Recruiting them already, are we?”

Recruiting you? Are they trying to get you to join their organization? What use would you be as a Stellaron Hunter? You have no battle experience (how would battle even work? Turn based fighting, even in the real world?), so you’re useless there. You have some tech know-how, but clearly nowhere near Silver Wolf’s talent. All you have is— oh.

They want your knowledge about being from beyond this world, don’t they? That revelation brings a sour feeling to your soul. So you weren’t being paid attention to out of genuine interest rather they’re using how you react so positively to being fawned over to gain your favor.

You pull back, away from Kafka and Blade. The chair scrapes the pavement painfully, shrieking as it does so. Both of their gazes flash over to you.

“Where are you headed off to little one?” Kafka calls for you as you gather yourself and stand. Blade remains silent, but his gaze makes up for it in intensity. Though with Kafka’s eyes being clouded and without pupils, it’s not a high calling.

“Restroom.” You lie comfortably.

“Let me come with you,” Kafka says, moving to standing as well.

Even if you do not use the same restroom, you shake your head. “It’s okay, I’ll be back,” maybe.

Himeko finds you wandering Central Starskiff Haven alone, her fiery hair flowing behind her as she speeds up her walk to a brisk pace. She calls out your name, making you look up and offer a half smile.

“Ms Himeko.” You greet.

When she reaches your side, she wraps a lean arm around your shoulders, and tugs you a tad bit closer. Her sweet perfume feels like a second hug.

“Did Kafka abandon you?” Himeko’s words bring a more genuine smile to your face, and respond lightly.

“I didn’t want to continue the conversation we were having.”

Her hand strokes over your hair, “hm? Do you want to elaborate on that or would you rather not breach that topic for now?” You wrap your arms around her waist, seeking comfort, and ignoring the way her golden accessories dig into your torso.

“I want to go home,” you reply quietly, speaking into her skin. Though you don’t know if you wish to go to your home, your home in the real world, or simply seek out the safety and privacy of the Astral Express.

“Let’s get you home, then.” Himeko keeps you close as you navigate through the thinning crowds. Her arms are sturdy as she keeps you close from other pedestrians.

“Where are the others?” you wonder idly. Perhaps they took the time to catch up with the Xianzhou Luofu locals. You hope they won’t leave early for your sake, childishly running away when things don’t go quite the way you’d wanted. That’d make you feel far worse than you already do.

“I believe Caelus and General Jing Yuan are training with Yanqing,” Himeko begins. “March is at the Divination Commision. Welt and Dan Heng are in the Exalting Sanctum. As for the native citizens, I can’t say I paid much attention to where they headed off to.”

You nod contemplatively. “Can we get something to drink, or eat, before we head back to the Express?” It seems like a decent way to spend the time, and your body seems to have realized that you haven’t eaten much today.

Himeko agrees, and both of you find your way to an outdoor table at the Sleepless Earl, the both of you nursing Immortal’s Delights and sharing a new cake they’re testing out. Mengming was eager to offer up the slice to you both, and well, free food is free food. It’s delicious too.

At a certain point you realize just how much of a date it is you’re on with Himeko, a classic coffee shop date. It makes warmth flutter in your chest like butterflies on fire. And she’s not doing it out of desire to wring you for information. Perhaps she feels some moral obligation to not let you get lost, but it seems that she likes you, genuinely, as a person. That brings a soft smile to your face that you cover with a sip of your sweet coffee.

Before you find yourself lost once more in the gold of Himeko’s eyes once again a flash of orange hair and brilliant fire catches your attention from your peripheral vision.

There’s a familiar looking street performer showing off dangerous fire swallowing tricks with a crowd surrounding her. With a start you realize it’s an unreleased character, one you had not accounted for being here.

Gui… something.

Himeko follows your gaze when you jolt, “I’m sure those tricks are safe, she looks well practiced.” Her cool hand covers yours, her gold rings clinking against the table.

You shake your head, “she’s part of the game.”

“Hm? I thought we rounded up everyone on this nation already?”

“I thought so too. She’s unreleased, but I’ve seen her trailer and some leaks. Gui, ah I can’t recall her name, but we should probably catch her attention when we can.”

Gui is amazing at keeping the crowd around her engaged. She’s a natural performer.

There’s a round of cheers as she leans back comically, covering her mouth like she’s going to cough before leaning upwards and blowing out a sharp stream of flame from her mouth.

“She’s really good,” you murmur to yourself, transfixed by her crowdwork.

“Indeed,” Himeko nods.

Guinaifen, you remember her name just as she takes a large, performative bow. The citizens around her disperse and you whisper her name under your breath. As if she could hear you, her amber eyes meet yours from across the pavilion. Her head tilts, her side ponytail leaning more crooked than it was.

“We should talk to her,” you say, but shyness is a hard beast to battle and you drop your stare.

Himeko lets out an amused huff as she stands and crosses to talk to the girl.

A few moments later the two fiery haired women return to your table. Guinaufen drags a chair from an empty nearby table and sits next to you.

“Ms Himeko here says you need to talk to me about something? I saw you watching my performance, so if you’re asking for trade secrets, I have to let you down now. A magician never reveals her secrets~.” There’s a sheen of sweat across her forehead and her baby hairs make a halo around her face. Your mouth dries up when you look at her.

“Oh, it’s nothing like that,” you say with a hoarse chuckle. You lift your refreshing drink up to wet your palate. “Actually, it’s a bit on the serious side. I would have invited you to the meeting earlier, but I didn’t expect to find you here.”

“Hm? What meeting?”

“You have to take my word for it but I am not lying. Make an audience with the general if you want. He will back up my claims.” You ignore her question, instead focusing on carefully delivering your words. “This is a game. I played this world as a video game, but somehow I wound up here and I’m letting you know because you are an important side character. I did not know to search for you, because you aren’t a part of the story yet. If a time comes where I need your assistance to get me back to where I belong or something like that, I wanted you to be informed of this.”

“HUH?”

After thorough explanation with Himeko’s assistance, you bid Guinaifen farewell.

The artificial lighting of the Alliance ships dims as time passes, simulating a sunset as a natural planet would have. When the sky turns orange and pink, the same soft pink as a certain March 7th’s hair, you and Himeko decide to make your way back to where the Astral Express docked.

To your surprise, when you step into the passenger cart the breasts of Jing Yuan greet you. You blink, then look up to meet the man’s eyes.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you there.” Jing Yuan chuckles to help alleviate your embarrassment.

“It’s quite alright, I must be going now, I hope to see you again, and soon,” he finishes by saying your name, the deep rumble of his voice bringing more warmth to your face.

“You too, me too. Uh, bye Jing Yuan, I hope to see you soon.” You’re going to die, that was so embarrassing, what the fuck, you’re so so silly. Himeko hides a smile, wrapping her arm around your shoulders to escort you back down the sleeping cart and to the safety of her room where you can recover from your flush.

taglist. @leafanonsforest

[stormblessed95]

Who Thoughts and Theories

First, it's such a good song. I'm genuinely so in love with it, with Jimins vocals, with his dance, with his backup dancers. I'm so impressed with how hard he worked and all the choices he contributed to it. While this is the only song on the album that Jimin doesn't have writing credits on, he was still very much involved in every aspect of the songs creation and it was written with the feelings Jimin wished to portray. I talk briefly about what I believe the overall feelings that Jimin was trying to express in the album Muse, here:

And of course because you should refresh yourself on the song and get that extra stream in before you read....

I'll otherwise just be talking about what I think, my thoughts, my feelings and my theories about Who, the song and the MV in this post. These are of course just my opinions, coming from my perspectives. You are free to agree or disagree as much as you want.

First, I want to say that regardless of the pronouns used in the song, I don't think it has any bearing on Jimins sexuality. People (read: homophobes) cannot use this song as a way to try to say Jimin can't be queer. Not only is that nonsensical and ignoring the fact that Jimin would be closeted if he is queer. But it's also ignoring the way Jimin speaks about the song, which is solely in gender neutral terms. From the original lyrics being "you" instead of "she."

To the way he says "people" instead of "girls/women" about the scene where people walk past him as the options of who he could be looking for. Along with the fact that the billboard with a man's eyes drop right after he sings "who is my heart Waiting for?"

The way that Jimin dances with both men and women and the scene then when they come together, it's absolutely giving west side story. Which is my personal opinion. Which one of the themes of west side story is love striving to rise above the hatred.... And idk about you, but I think that can easily relate to queer love as well. But again, personal opinion only! So this BS that I know everyone rolled their eyes at with the "this proved he is straight" nonsense, is at its core.... Nonsense...

Speaking of his dance, this thread has absolutely nothing to do with what I'll talk about in this post but is so cool and FULL of Jimin appreciation and you should check it out if you want!

Jimin switched aspect ratios of film during his MV of Who. An ARMY linked together all the times he changed ratios, which you can watch here:

As well as going through multiple different types of media: television, comic strips, movie, billboards, etc. Jimin is showing us multiple different storylines within his MV. This same person from above goes into great detail about how all this can show the various details of storylines and storytelling. It's a good read, worth checking out

It's super interesting the way the words play across the screen during certain parts of the MV and how it changes the screen ratios as well. I would love an actual interpretation from Jimin or the MV director over what they actually mean or if it was just in the 90s theme with zero correlation or meanings, but I doubt we will ever get that. So all we can do is guess and make our own interpretations. Which will be affected by our own personal biases. That's the beauty of art though!

The ones I'll point out that I'll say something about are:

Play, both in the corners at times and on the little TV's around the MV

Auto calibration, with the burning wrecked car, where the words flash quickly across the screen at the bottom, right before hand too, the screen ratio had changed again too. And it changes again as he does his partner choreo with the girl

Rewind, which appears during the bridge. Right after the billboard falls and the screen ratio had changed again

And then pause at the very end before the whole screen cuts.... And then we get the end screen with the words play again, basically looping the video, and the Smeraldo Flower

So let's talk about it!

It's interesting that the video basically loops, it's really giving storytelling. Jimin being an actor basically. "Play" being inside the story for the most part. And it's interesting that those parts happen right before a lot of the partnering choreo too. Auto calibration means bringing something back into an acceptable range. Which if we relate this at all to queerness, it's absolutely giving "don't stray too far out of that closet." And it does happen right after Jimin dances with men, before dancing with the woman again. And play is back in the little TV's. It's giving, trying to be perfect and fit into expectations and be in the perfect storybook. And at the end, Jimin is left behind by all the dancers and the billboard drops at "who is my heart Waiting for" and it's clearer and clearer that it really is most likely JKs eyes. If not, it's absolutely a man's eyes and that is screaming queer energy. And even if it is just a promo of some kind, since we don't know the connection between the eyes, JK, "keep going" and AYS yet, it's WILD to put Jikook promo in this type of love song. And yet, these are the two that publicly claimed the song serendipity as theirs. So it tracks.

And when we get to rewind, it's at the same time as he is talking about "people" walking by him as potentials for his perfect match, as well as how he is not able to "match" any of the women he attempts to meet with through dance in his short walk. It is also right after that billboard with ?Jungkook? drops too. Interesting. Trying to get back into the original story perhaps? Perhaps it's not working so well?

Pause. Off. Smeraldo Flower which represents the Truth Untold.... Speaking yourself. Loving yourself. Being true to who you are..... Which is maybe not what was the perfect story that was being depicted through the MV. Who knows! But that is the end. Just to loop around and start again with Play. Where he literally tells us with Muse to "please misunderstand." Again, just interesting. And if you are following my thoughts here, you already know why that is "interesting."

It's giving closeted queer energy and it's giving I like people, not genders and it's giving love.

Which brings me to the very LAST thing I want to talk about. Sorry, I know this is already SO LONG. Jimin is singing amongst natural disasters. So did V and JK actually too. They are singing about declaring love in the middle of some kind of disaster. And I can't stop thinking about that honestly.

It's giving peak grand gesture kinda romance. It's giving intimacy found between two people in love no matter where they are or how loud the world might be around them. It's giving raw and honest declarations of intent and love type vibes. And i just love that they are into and going for that exaggerated confession scene and storybook kinda romance. It's absolutely tracks for who they are as people and the romance they've all talked about wanting too. And who else do we know who always seems to like doing grand gesture type romantic BS for someone else?

Anyway! This is the feeling that people write epic romances about. Your favorite ships? It's the same type of feeling that's inspired here. Let me try to explain this in some kinda way....

It's a trope. "Love conquers all" where it doesn't matter what life throws at you. All the trials, the tribulations, the natural disasters, the normal disasters, any and all shortcomings or failures you might face in life.... The moment of being with the one you love? Of being vulnerable and baring your soul with another person who means the world to you? Making sure they understand how much they mean to you and how much you love them? That's always going to be the most important thing and moment. That is the significance of the intimacy and the romance displayed.

It's the peak, idealistic version of the best relationship you could find yourself in. Nothing and no one matters more than the moments you create with your loved one, even in the middle of a raging horrific apocalyptic disaster ridden world.

And how sometimes, just building up to that confession can make things feel like a horrific apocalyptic disaster ridden world, until you confess. And you let those feelings out. And it's okay. All those disasters quiet down, maybe you even start to enjoy the rain. It was your emotions all along. And then you discover that hey, maybe the reason I'm feeling so calm now is actually BECAUSE of this person I love. Being with them calms my mind, brings me safety, happiness and joy.

Sometimes, in the middle of all the madness and chaos of the world... You are only minutes away from finding that moment with that person that's going to give you something infinite. Something that no natural disaster can destroy or take away from you. Something, and/or someone, so precious.

And there is something so beautiful in depicting this in their love songs. It's inspirational. As well as humorous in regards to Seven. Lol

I'll just finish this off with a link to this twitter user as this moment just came out, and it's about rebirth, but I do low-key agree with them here 😂

And anyway, that was my essay! Lol if you read all of this. Bless you and thank you! You are appreciated! A reminder that this is all just personal opinions. You are free to agree or disagree as you choose!

[twopoint99]

Possible spoilers if you haven’t already listened or read the book. Also, spoilers for The Horror of Dracula, 1958 and Bram Stoker’s Dracula, 1992.

One of my favorite things about @re-dracula is seeing the reactions of people whose main exposure to the story is through the many film adaptations. The differences in how the characters relate to one another are way too many to list from film to film. Even aside from the bizarre choices (Lucy as Mina’s sister-in-law - the Horror of Dracula, 1958, or Mina as the reincarnation of Dracula’s lost love - Bram Stoker’s Dracula, 1992) the most important difference between those adaptations and re - dracula is that these are fully rounded characters who clearly care about one another.

Jonathan adores Mina, Mina loves him, and loves Lucy. The suitor squad and Van Helsing genuinely cherish Lucy and it causes everyone palpable pain when they see her slipping away. When the group finally gets together in one place, they all acknowledge and respect the various strengths they each bring, and they hold one another up as needed.

None of the characters seem cast aside, as often happens in film adaptations. Even the 1992 film, which includes all three suitors, doesn’t manage to make them all seem like full personalities. They appear more as aspects of an individual, or as tropes. Lucy herself in the ‘92 movie is the complete opposite of her characterization in the novel. Her behavior in the film is anachronistic at best, and offensive at the least. It is a perfect illustration of the stupid and misogynistic attitude in horror that “wanton” women are punished.

Not only that, but it also completely changes the story and the dreadful implications of it. Lucy isn’t targeted because she’s “done something wrong” (quotes because I don’t believe expressing/exploring one’s sexuality is wrong, no matter what my favorite genre keeps telling me), she is targeted because she is convenient. Dracula wasn’t musing in between leaving his castle and reaching England that by golly, he couldn’t wait to terrorize Lucy Westenra! He saw an opportunity, like any other predator, and he took it.

Of course, we’ve seen that he is very willing to play with his food once he feels in control. He was very pleased to be able to torment Jonathan, yet another character who is often treated poorly in adaptations - in the 1958 version he’s so smug and patronizing toward what appears to be a terrified woman, that I was actively hoping for his death.

In contrast, the novel/Dracula Daily/re-dracula show us a sweet, earnest man, one who is gentle and loving. He, like Lucy, is a convenient victim, and like Lucy, is innocent.

The true horror is that terrible things can happen to anyone, and no amount of wealth, education, or simple good-heartedness, will act as a shield. There are no preventatives, and no one “deserves” the terrible things that happen. The real strength of the story isn’t in deciding which characters(usually women) are worthy of saving, an overly simplistic approach that many film adaptations take, some more subtly than others. The story resonates because in spite of the randomness of the horror, the people involved decide to do something about it.

These people are not always perfect or even heroic. Dr. Seward (who I really enjoy, and who is also often portrayed badly in adaptation) is not a safe person for his patients to be around. He is ableist, arrogant, patronizing, and definitely not handling his own mental health well. He is also loving, practical, loyal, and in many ways exceptionally tender-hearted. All of the cast is achingly good in their portrayals, but Johnny Sims’ interpretation of Seward has been revelatory. The man is flawed, but gosh darnit, he’s absolutely human. His pain is visceral, his awkwardness is utterly relatable, and his attempts to make things make sense is so hard to hear, because we want the awful things to be a puzzle with a logical solution, but we also know that there is no motivation for what is happening, it is all chance.

Mina herself questions why they need worry about Dracula, once he is gone from England. By this time she’s had a horrific experience with the count and understandably wants to be done with the whole thing. Earlier, however, she begins her work of compiling all the information available about Dracula, because she understands that something may need to be done, for the good of all.

She is afraid of losing her husband, she is afraid of what other horrors may wait, but she also is able to put that aside to continue to pursue stopping Dracula, so that there won’t be another victim, and so that Dracula himself might be saved from the horrific reality he’s experienced for so long.

I have been telling people ad nauseum that re-dracula is hands down the best adaptation of the novel I’ve ever encountered. It is because it is treated as a story about people, real people, with real connections to those around them, real flaws and strengths, who grow to share a bond. They swear to stop Dracula, not out of vengeance, as Jonathan can be forgiven for wanting, but out of love for those they have lost and those they may save.

[idv-sunsxin3]

Diggers // Dating Headcanons

Note// I gotta write this since i successfully managed to bring him home;;; 🥺

____

Diggers is canonly a hippie. He is based on them, his voice lines often tell how peace is better than war- I don't have the mind to interpret him with many kinds of hippies stereotypes because I'm still skeptical about some things that I don't even know better- 🤔🫠

There may even be misunderstandings because it actually really happened to the hippies from the 60s sometimes -

Diggers cherishes the times he gets to talk with you, always looking forward to seeing every day and getting to know you...

He is even eager to share his passions while he learns to understand yours as well. He has always been accepting and non-judgmental, ever since you first met. No matter the flaws.

It's probably how he treats everyone because of his moral standards- but it's also more than that... because it's you.

He definitely senses something different about you the moment your fingers touched..

You're his muse, "the sunlight from the mornings, the starlight of the night.... his whole universe." Yes, he said that to you once once--- 😭🫠🥺

But well, he loves showing some of his works of art - well, only the ones he managed to keep. He most likely does graffiti and flower power aesthetics.

Imagine there is a time you two painted a mark of your initials inside a heart with a paint spray on the same bench you both sat in where you first met each other--- it would be fate for sure smh;;;;

Hangouts usually would be staying with him at the back of his van with the doors open, so the windy day can go through. You sometimes lay down on the carpet he places down. You would hear him play his guitar as he sits across from you, serenading you with his slow, soothing tunes.

The sight of the grassfield's landscape can be seen from the van's back seat, along with the small silhouette of London from afar. Once Diggers stops playing, he tends to place his hand on your head and give it headpats... slowly massaging your scalp after as you try to stay awake.

He loves pampering you in his own way, letting you rest with him during lazy days.

He is a sweet, laid-back lover... He trusts you enough that his jealousy levels are low to none just by simply thinking of the many things that can make you feel safe and happy with him- having himself being part of your life is already an honor to him.

But of course, I can imagine he would be like a kicked puppy whenever you ignore him for too long... like not seeing for 3 days can already make him feel droopy;;;

You'll do a lot of outdoor activities with Diggers when dating him-- he would always say things like like "be one with the forest" or "connect with mother nature" while making you these pretty flower crowns to adorn them on your head,,,

Camping in a forest is one of the common things you two do, Diggers knowing lots of things about how to survive in the wild while only having his van as a refuge.

Don't underestimate for his slender figure!!! He can even name you many kinds of herbs, flowers, and berries. Even point out the ones that are venomous or poisonous. He can't do math or this deep insight science, but at least he is knowledgeable in certain fields.

This is just me, but I love a Diggers giving his s/o the passenger princess treatment. No more questions/ih

He talks to you in a very honeyed and flowery voice, you don't even know if he's ever angry at you even while being this upset---(to be true, he never brings himself to be angry at you-- it wouldn't be cool) With how he calls you "Honey", "Baby ", "Love", and so much more, you'll probably need a sleeping bag because man, his voice;;;

He is very affectionate - maybe a bit touchy even. Lots of hugs, kisses, hands on the small of your back, waist, or hip - he always has this tendency of keeping a hand on you when you're around.

If you give him the consent(because consent is beautiful✨️), he doesn't feel embarrassed when pulling you to his lap or holding you so close from behind around anyone.

His holds are meant to be pure and innocent. Having your bodies touch helps him charge his batteries from any stress he ever has to experience in a fast-faced world you both are living in.;;😔

He always likes to carefully plant soft kisses on your forehead, eyelids, cheeks, hands, and shoulder,,, (neck if he really wants to make out with you;;; 👉👈 *gets bonked for not being normal *) Lots of smooching when he finds the lovely opportunity.

He is 100% honest with you, never lies at all. Even would tell you his honest opinions in a sincere, half-hearted manner. Otherwise, it would be against his principles of a peace and love relationship. He wants to love you unconditionally no matter the future struggles that may happen between you two. Always avoiding toxicity and any form of hate towards you.

He loves taking care of his body, eating natural and non-processed food as possible, and going on vegetarian diets. He wants to share his little routines with you, if you want to, of course,,, it is pretty much a way he shows that he enjoys living life with you and taking care of you if you allow him to once in a while. It's like a sign of building trust for him. 🥺

It's so cute when he wants to try and persuade you to try these vivid color clothes with lots of patterns on it, even having these flower matching Keychains.;;

No matter the path you want to go to, he'll always support you and your choices,,, he'll encourage you to do anything your heart desires to achieve, as long as you're true to yourself. 🥺✨️

Overall! He is such a walking green flag. What else can I say to support that? You probably might have more ideas, and the floor is always open for them, my friends 😌✨️💅

[idyllic-affections]

invisible disability? it's rather visible to me.

summary. baizhu knows the struggle of maintaining a job while being chronically ill; as such, he is willing to offer an accommodating work environment for others who struggle like he does.

trigger & content warnings. angst (at first... it gets better i swear /lh), ableism, etc.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. hurt/comfort. baizhu & chronically ill!teen!reader, qiqi & reader. 1.7k words. they/them pronouns for reader.

author's thoughts. he's out of nonplayable prison ygs!!!!! can't wait to see his character stories for..... personal reasons..... anyways i want to specify that i am chronically ill. i am constantly fighting with my genetics to be healthy, its ridiculous LMAO

imagine baizhu employing a chronically ill, visionless teenager.

baizhu can easily say he's known their family for a long time, so he of course knows that they have trouble keeping a job. they often mention little things like that about their life during their visits with him. never once has he found anything wrong with them; they're always in virtually perfect health.

that doesn't change the fact that they're very clearly struggling. he's observed just how much they overexert themselves in a desperate attempt to actually keep a stable job, simply to help support their family, but all the exertion only seems to make their invisible issues worse.

also... they've been in his care for heat stroke more than once in liyue's warmer seasons. the heat is just far too much for their body to handle if they aren't careful.

"What the hell is wrong with me?"

Their voice was so quiet and whispery that if Baizhu hadn't been attuned closely to them at that moment, he might have missed it. They half wished that he would have. Based on the brief glance he spared in their direction, they knew he was listening. Oh well.

"I mean... really. This is ridiculous," they murmured, knees drawn up against their chest. "Everyone thinks I'm just dramatic. I'm not. I do fine for the most part, but then it just... gets bad for no reason at all... how am I in perfect health?"

By that point in their rant, his undivided attention was on them. Though his gaze was thoughtful, musing, they interpreted it differently and winced slightly.

"...Sorry. I really shouldn't be complaining like this in front of someone who's chronically ill."

"No, it's quite alright. You shouldn't minimize your pain. Your struggles are as valid as mine. I find your trust, your ability to confide in me, quite endearing, even," he reassured, unbothered, to which their shoulders seemed to lose some of the tension they harbored. "In fact... I've been thinking about this for quite some time now. Chronic illness may show itself in a variety of forms. Sometimes it may show itself in the form of your symptoms. Would you like to learn how to manage your energy better?"

the liyuean doctor basically hired them right then and there, but they don't really realize that for the first few weeks.

in the beginning, they're just... spending time at bubu pharmacy, learning how baizhu manages his own limited energy and applying those techniques to their own life (it works shockingly well). that's all!

it slowly turns into them helping out where they can—packaging herbs, learning what exactly each one of them does, delivering prescriptions to those who cannot physically get the medicines themselves... even when people start to question if they've found a new job, they remain oblivious.

it's one day while helping mince herbs that they realize they're basically a junior herbalist.

A soft hiss left their lips when the knife nicked the pad of their finger. They were quick to put pressure on the little cut, pulling their hand away from the countertop to prevent any blood from dripping onto it.

"It's best to get rid of those herbs," Baizhu reminded, stepping away from his own work to gently bandage their wound.

A small pout graced their lips. "I didn't get any blood on them, though..."

Amusement and the vaguest hint of fondness twinkled in his gaze. "We don't know that for certain, do we, now?"

"...Wait a minute." Their eyes narrowed suspicously at him, drawing their freshly-dressed hand back once he was done. "This isn't about energy management anymore, is it? Have I been... I've been working here this entire time. These tasks are very employee-like."

"Come, now. Don't look at me like that. You were looking for a stable job, and I am more than willing to accomodate your needs."

"You could've at least said something to me. I've been doing free labor all this time, and as a child, no less! Hmm... now, I do believe that is illegal in this part of Teyvat~ It'd be shame to get Ms. Yanfei involved~"

in the spirit teaching them to manage their energy, he often takes them on house calls with him, starting off to just homes in liyue harbor and later to homes all the way in qingce village. it's a good way for them to gain stamina and get a better understanding of their job.

baizhu has a tendency to smile through his own pain for the sake of his patients.

this habit slipped by unchecked until [name] came around.

whenever they feel like he isn't doing very well, they'll take over for him regardless of what he has to say about it.

herbalist gui is very thankful for them—baizhu hardly ever listened to him, but he does take better care of himself for [name]'s sake.

(he swears that baizhu is oddly parental when it comes to them, but he wouldn't dare mention the doctor's blatant affections to his face.)

"welcome to bubu pharmacy," they'd greet with a kind smile after unceremoniously shoving baizhu towards the back of the pharmacy where he could rest undisturbed, "unfortunately, dr. baizhu is currently out of commission, but herbalist gui and i would be glad to take care of anything you may need."

sometimes changsheng can be seen wrapped around their arm! usually it's their dominant arm, which is terribly inconveniencing. still, it would be an honor to be Chosen™ by their loved one's pet... if only she wasn't so mean to them.

"Hmph. You're terrible at cutting herbs. It pains me just to watch."

"Okay? Go back to Dr. Baizhu then? I'm not holding you hostage, Changsheng. You came to me," they huffed. "Also... maybe I'd be able to cut better if you weren't strangling my dominant arm. Just saying."

It's a few moments later that they're sulking, murmuring curses as Baizhu disinfected their fresh snake bite. Changsheng completely neglected to apologize until Baizhu had prompted her to.

(They would complain that he found that incident a little too funny if anyone were to ask them. It really hurt, you know!)

changsheng bullies them lovingly <3 she bites them affectionately <33

(not that she'd ever say that, though. baizhu knows. he just chooses to let her believe he doesn't know.)

qiqi becomes very attached to them very quickly, i think. she'd like having a nice older sibling around and would address them as such without even thinking about it. "jiějiě," "gēgē"... she can't really tell what gender they identify closer with and doesn't remember to ask, so she tends to bounce between the two terms of address.

she has an entire page in her journal dedicated to little things about [name] that she deems to be important. she notes down things they seem to like, things they seem to dislike, their birthday, other important dates, defining features...

she also keeps important warning signs related to health episodes of their's jotted down, like how when [name] stands still a little too long, qiqi should urge them to sit for a moment because they're probably either dizzy or having vision issues, or how when their hands begin to tremble, qiqi should share a sunsettia with them.

she does miss these signs sometimes... she does her best, though! qiqi only wants to help the sweet junior herbalist that braids her hair and accompanies her on her herb-picking trips and hugs her and says "i love you, please stop this task, you might get hurt" with so much genuine affection that it often overwhelms her :(

it's rare, but sometimes, there will be a customer or patient that has little tolerance for their disability-induced weakness or slowness.

because their illness(es) is(/are) invisible, very few people take their struggles seriously.

some people take this as an excuse to verbally and even physically abuse them.

baizhu does not take kindly to people abusing his employees, especially not his chronically ill teenage employee. especially not them.

"Is there an issue I can help with?"

They didn't mind being the only one at reception during the days Herbalist Gui was out, Qiqi was herb-picking, and Baizhu was otherwise occupied. It wasn't a big deal, really.

At least... not until someone particularly impatient decided to make their job difficult.

Baizhu never took kindly to such incidents; this one was no different. Based on his tone of voice alone, it wasn't hard to guess that he was livid, golden irises alight with rage. Even Changsheng had hissed in their defense at the sight in front of her eyes.

He'd come back just in time to see them flinch away from the raised hand of some foreign adventurer.

"This one—"

"And who said I was asking you?" he scoffed, sliding behind the counter and checking them for wounds. They were shaking, he noted, gingerly supporting a fraction of their weight in case they were to collapse. "I was asking my herbalist, [Name]."

Baizhu was a man of patience and, really...

He wasn't all that confrontational. Despite that, any semblance of the supposed cowardice he harbored was gone in an instant.

His scarred fingers drew soothing shapes on their upper arm as he led them into the back of the clinic, guiding them to sit on one of the beds before their legs could give out.

"Are you alright?"

baizhu takes very good care of them after stressful encounters because he knows very well that such high-stress emotional experiences will take a toll on their body.

whenever a wealthier patient comes in, they've learned to overcharge them on purpose even if it's for the most ridiculous of ailments; oh? you say you have been sneezing quite a lot and are having a hard time breathing? no, no, it's not springtime allergies, who told you that? it's quite dire, in fact, and the treatment price will be awfully expensive... oh? you'll pay it? wonderful!

^ herbalist gui says that baizhu is a terrible influence on them sometimes.

in their defense, they get hefty bonuses every time wealthy people pay ridiculous prices for typically rather inexpensive herbs (like a certain ginger harbinger did one time! they still giggle at the memory of him paying so much for so little). the more wealthy people pay, the bigger their bonuses (fatui harbingers are very wealthy...).

simply put, they make more mora than the majority of their family put together because of this morally dubious behavior.

baizhu, gui, qiqi, and [name] are a chaotic found family but yk what? they all make it work <3

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

[lil-elle]

Can you do xikers reaction to you having different colored eyes??

Umm I hope I understood this correctly 😭

XIKERS when you have Heterochromia

(two different coloured eyes)

pairs: xikers x gn!reader

genre: fluff, established relationship

word count: 616

content: fluffy sweet boyfies, kisses

a/n: i'm worried i didn't interpret this correctly but if i did, it's really creativeee (also it's a little short since I didn't exactly know what to put 😭)

Minjae:

Would be so fascinated and accidentally lean in too close to you before realising

It'd be one of his favourite features of yours and he'd always defend you if someone called it weird or something 

Loves staring into your eyes

-

Junmin:

Would ask all the questions about how that happens and when you noticed and just everything

Would bring it up to everyone you two meet (unless it makes you uncomfortable of course, and then he'd tell people you don't like talking about it if they brought it up)

Would kiss your eyelids before bed, they'd become his favourite place to kiss

-

Sumin:

You'd literally become his muse, you'd start noticing that whenever he paints people, they'll always have two different coloured eyes

Would come up with some cute nickname for you like “skittles” or just any candy that's a mix of flavours

Would fight literally anyone that says it's weird or scary

-

Jinsik:

You'd always catch him staring at your eyes and he'd get flustered when you look at him

It'd definitely be the first thing that makes him start falling for you, it's just something so unique that he adores

Your eyes would always be such a comfort for him, always telling you to look into his eyes when he's feeling anxious or down

-

Hyunwoo:

Would be so shocked at first, he didn't even know it was something that someone could be born with

He'd listen with wide eyes as you tell him about it, except he wouldn't take in a single piece of information, mesmerised

He'd randomly go “you're so pretty” whenever you looked at him

-

Junghoon:

His eyes would go wide when he notices but he'd act like he's not infatuated with them

He'd always steal glances at them, even once you've been dating for a while he'd still be so obsessed

You'd tease him about how much he loved your eyes by having staring contests with him and he'd always lose because looking at them for too long makes him flustered

-

Seeun:

Definitely vocal about how cool they are and would use them to flirt with you, constantly complimenting them and making up pick-up lines around them

Would melt whenever you looked at him, he'd be embarrassed if you realised how much of an effect they had on him though

Would jokingly cover your eyes if you were talking to someone, saying “only I'm allowed to look into these eyes.”

-

Yujun:

Would just be “:O”

Would wanna tell everyone he knows about how pretty they are and how pretty you are and how lucky he is to have you (they'd all make fun of him but he can't stop himself)

Would get distracted a lot whenever you're trying to talk to him because he'd just be zoning out while staring into your eyes

-

Hunter:

“God, your eyes are gorgeous.” In the most deep and sultry voice and then you'd literally die (he knows what he's doing, trust me)

Would pull away from kisses just to stare into your eyes. While you're waiting for him to kiss you again, he's getting lost in them

Thinks they're the prettiest thing in the world. No magnificent view or bouquet of flowers could compare

-

Yechan:

“WOAH !!!! THAT'S SO COOL !!! :D”

If you ever felt insecure about your eyes, he'd change that so fast and make you love them as much as he does with endless compliments and exclamations

If anyone ever made fun of them, he'd drag you away and smother you in kisses and compliments before going back to the person that said something and give them a piece of his mind

-

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

TAGLIST:

@hyunromi @chocoeon @hyunukitty @minjaezed @ihyeokzu @cake1box @chiiyuuvv

[amber-jinx]

Me again!

Do you think that Rachel and Max had a spiritual connection with one another? They’re completely different as far as their personalities and outer appearances. Yet, they both have one thing in common:

Their love for Chloe.

Plus, the fact that Rachel appeared as Max’s spirit animal (the doe) somewhat shows me that they were connected to some degree. What do you think?

You always ask great questions! I must admit I'm not as well versed on Max's side of the story as Rachel's, so there definitely are people who can give a more comprehensive answer than me. But imma just try and write what comes to mind :)

For 2 people that have never met, their spiritual connection, chemistry, "fate entanglement" as I liked to call what they have are the strongest across the fandoms I've seen. When Max returned, we as players felt Rachel's presence all over Arcadia bay. In the original there was even a line to the effect of "I feel like everything in this town is connected to Rachel Amber somehow". Max was able to "see" Rachel through different people in Arcadia bay. Everyone had something to say about her, even a random trucker. It can be said that she really had an effect on the people of that town, if we put the fire aside. This town being Max's hometown adds another layer to it, it is so much different due to Rachel's existence.

left pic from a fan made Rachel DLC | Yes, their love for Chloe is the key link that transcends through time & space, allowing them to see each other in some way.

Like the town, Max is also very different from her past self. While she didn't have such a strong presence back when she was growing up in Arcadia, Max eventually became the decider of the town's (including most of its people) fate. Whether Rachel is the root cause to Max's powers is very much a mystery and up to interpretation, just like many things in life is strange.

If we acknowledge that Rachel is the cause of the fire, there could be another parallel: this girl who tried to leave this town nearly destroyed the town; meanwhile another girl who came back actually have the power to do that, or stop it from getting destroyed. Even though both never meant to. (Not expanding on Rachel being the storm here cuz it's really not definitive & personally I think if Rachel's got powers she'd just use them on those who did her wrong, not the entire town)

Personality-wise, especially on the outside, they are almost opposites. But somehow I get the feeling that they'd really understand each other, because on the inside, they may not be that different. I've seen a Tumblr post saying Rachel using her people skills to get on people's good side is mirrored by Max using her rewind powers to fix her responses. (When you've got such an ability, of course you use them! Which is different from being manipulative, might I add.)

Rachel with her sensitive, vulnerable side, which she guarded & masked with so much effort and painted with her smiles & godly social skills, is definitely able to understand & empathise with Max and not judge her. And Max being pretty perceptive herself, having quite an astute understanding of Rachel just from photos she found, is definitely able to see more than Rachel lets on. Both are powerful smartasses and fiercely protective of Chloe. (& both bi x)

Max sees, Rachel shows. The photographer & the muse. Built for an "electric combo", as Love is Strange says, even though they may not hit it off well at the start due to awkwardness or slight jealousy from both sides, eventually they're gonna realise that the other is beneficial for them. Max is able to ground Rachel and give her heartfelt & real advice that she needed; Rachel's able to help build Max's confidence, socialise better (back off V, she's with me), share insights about art & photography.

I'd even say Max & Rachel may complement each other more than Max and Chloe, OR Chloe and Rachel. (If there are more content on these 2, AmberPrice in my heart might be challenged. Yeah. It's scary.)

Some say they share the same spirit animal, which is really possible (bts putting that "doe see doe" photo on Rachel's bed frame), or it could mean that as Max's spirit animal, Max sees all spirits in a doe form. Another possibility is that Rachel have the doe as her spirit animal, and everyone who can see her spirit sees the doe. Nonetheless it's incredible that Max seems to be the only person to be able to see the doe, or that Rachel chose to present herslef to only Max. Definitely a connection there. 🦌

Looking at their personalities through enneagram (Rach 4, Max likely 9) we see that they can be similar but in different ways (9 & 4 can be mistyped):

"The difference is that Nines are detached both from the external world and from their emotions (not keeping in touch w Chloe in Seattle & delay on reaching out to her?), whereas Fours withdraw from whatever has caused them pain (delaying telling Chloe about her messy relationships cuz it causes her pain? + her immediate reaction to finding James making out with another woman). Nines see the world through rose-colored glasses, and their view of it is comforting, whereas Fours see the world from a garret window as outsiders and are not comforted: everyone else seems to be living a happier, more normal life."

Thanks for the question! I've no idea I was gonna write this long. You guys can see a few of my blogs or reblogs that I've mentioned these 2 via the tag "Rachel and Max" or "Amberfield" if interested :) Feel free to reblog/ add on!

[feelingpure]

hawk meeting tim just in time is just a storytelling decision, the point is just for us as the audience to see them meeting then and there.

but i wouldn't characterize hawk as soft(ening) at all, i think he is aware of his feelings for tim (the letter dictation), but because of homophobia, the regular one and internalized lol, he's dealing with that badly, and subsequently extending that to how he treats tim. bc first of all, it's a big deal overall to find yourself falling in love with someone, regardless of sexuality and gender, i think there's a little bit of mundane relationship drama in there, but on top of that, the homophobia of the 50s, and hawk never having had that kind of relationship before, as the first scene with that random blonde guy establishes, he's used to fucking a guy and leaving, but now he's developing a meaningful something with tim, no matter how much he resists admitting it (to himself, let alone tim). I do think he was genuinely affected by tim being upset bc of the birthday, but also he can never outright apologize and show remorse and make up for his mistakes.

I wrote another Fellow Travelers essay.

Under the cut.

I understand it could just be that, but I'm just going off of how it seemed to me. Could be interpreted different ways tbh, like maybe that's Hawk's way of being 'romantic', by making it seem so spontaneous.

He's definitely aware of his feelings, the letter dictation scene is a v good example of that. The fact he says "I fell for you...", and all the rest, while his eyes are flitting between the paper and Tim.

But of course, for all the reasons you mention (and the conflict of wanting to secure his own financial future/freedom via Lucy's family), he refuses to confront it himself, never mind explicitly admitting it out loud. And it's clear that he is far from being ready to do that yet, which makes Tim's plea via singing so so painful.

"You won't admit you love me, and so, how am I ever to know... A million times I ask you. And then, I ask you over again... So if you really love me, say yes. Or if you don't dear, confess..." 😭

Ugh, anyway. I keep going back and forth about Hawk. But I feel like he's meant to be much harder to read on purpose, so I don't really have anything overt to cite as him being genuinely affected by the whole birthday thing (can only muse on his inner conflict regarding that).

Unlike Tim, who makes what he feels so clear and verbalises it; it's a lot easier for everyone to see and know he's hurt (and for me to get in his corner and want to yell at Hawk for causing it). And I'm sure my feelings will continue to fluctuate on both of them as the series goes on, and I'm sure that's the intention.

Sorry I took long to reply, been thinking, and also knew I'd spend ages typing back a long ass answer myself! 😆 There's so much to say, but I feel like we agree on the actual crux of it all? Uhh, just don't ask me about that sex scene.

(Also re your other message to the inbox; it's fine and was comprehensible haha, from one rambler to another.)

[crescentfool]

recently, i’ve been thinking about what a 100% social link/confidant run is like from the perspective of the persona protagonists, rather than the player. i’ve always been a sucker for thinking about the type of narrative created by a person’s gameplay choices (it can be so fun and deep) so!! i wrote this analysis / musing.

some notes before we start: this was written with the lens of persona 3 being the most recent game i played- but the concepts are applicable to the p4/p5 protagonists as well! no spoilers for any of the games are mentioned; this is moreso a general discussion of ludonarrative dissonance with the game mechanics and narrative and how it makes for fun angst (ft. personal interpretation).

(more under the cut!)

the framework: game mechanics

in all of the games, the social link system’s existence coincides with the social stats mechanic. certain social links require a specific set of stats in order to initiate it, or surpass a certain rank. each game has around 20 of these- each of which represent the major arcana (+ some bonuses, e.g. aeon / jester / faith / councilor).

for any players going for a 100% social link run, this basically requires each social stat to be maxed out. anyone who’s followed a guide for a 100% run would know that the beginning of the game tends to be very “strict” with how time can be used, most of which involves getting the stats raised  as soon as possible.

outside of characterization and worldbuilding, completing social links are incentivized for a variety of gameplay reasons. so how could this completionist play style affect the protagonists?

prioritizing social stats over everything else: a general view

regardless of which protagonist you want to put under a petri dish, with a 100% run, you’re essentially asking the protagonist to form amicable bonds with 20 or so people, give or take. granted, not everyone becomes adjoined to the hip to the protagonist.

personally, i feel that forming 20 different bonds over the course of a year would be rather strenuous. during these 100% runs, the protagonists may feel that they’re spreading themselves thin trying to dedicate their resources to multiple different people as well as raising their “social stats.” i find the implications that this has on said bonds is so, utterly fascinating.

while this isn’t reflected in the game and would be better represented within a fic, i find it difficult to believe that this type of behavior doesn’t have any ramifications on the quality of the protagonist’s closer relationships (or their self-image, for that matter).

just… imagine calling one of your close friends but then they consistently give responses along the lines of “lmao sorry i’m busy doing other things,” and they rarely make the time of day for you. how would you feel? gameplay-wise, this deterioration of the relationship is best represented in persona 3 with social links reversing if you haven’t spent time with them in awhile.

part of my fascination with this concept is influenced by my own experiences. trying to maintain so many relationships can be difficult to keep up with and it quickly gets overwhelming (see dunbar’s number for more information). jumping between so many people also makes it difficult to focus on a few relationships meaningfully- meaning that relationships may be limited to being simple pleasantries. even then, ‘successfully’ keeping every relationship satisfying comes at the cost of being unable to pursue your own development and interests.

overall, i think that trying to do so many things ends up lowering the quality of the relationship(s) involved, especially when you also consider the fatigue from going to school as well as fighting shadows.

playing the therapist friend / listening role: a general view

another aspect of the 100% run that i think about is how the protagonists rarely open up to other people. a good chunk of SLs follow a storyline of the protagonist acting as a therapist friend/helping the other person through one central issue. some SLs are an exception to this and have a more casual “we’re just hanging out vibe.”

basically, SLs tend to be weighted toward the other character’s growth, moreso than the protagonist’s (which is handled by the main story). that said, the idea of mostly playing a listening role across most of your relationships and not having many that you feel comfortable to speak freely about your own stuff… feels really unbalanced and unhealthy?

i do think that part of the lack of “input” can be attributed to the silent-protagonist approach taken in the games (which is a whole ‘nother topic). but!! i find that each protagonist’s options, while limited, are fun to think about! some of the traits and interpretations i’ve seen for the differing protags, to name a few, include:

being afraid to open up / get attached and keeping people at arm’s distance as a result

needing to be around other people, even if it’s just listening them, to distract from their own struggles / pretend nothing’s wrong with them

enjoying helping others, being a good and careful listener who can provide an appropriate and helpful response

the willingness to prioritize others over themselves; a lack of self-preservation

compulsive people pleasing

at its worst, the lack of “protagonist talking” or equal reciprocation in response could be misinterpreted by the other person as disinterest (like they’re talking to a wall). alternatively- the lack of “personal tidbits” could be taken as, “you don’t trust me enough to be able to open up, huh.” and i just think that seeing this in a fic would be the biggest shitshow ever (and i would read that).

concluding thoughts:

overall, i feel that the protagonists taking a predominantly listening approach to several relationships at once can lead to compassion fatigue and general burnout. the protagonists are rarely at the receiving end of being listened to and/or having their issues worked through… and that’s kind of sad?

while the 100% social link run can provide great power to any persona fusions (and other cool battle abilities + hijinks)... i ultimately think that there’d be a lot of mental strain that would make achieving this much more difficult when you take a narrative-emphasized approach.

i do realize that it is possible to see the general vibe of this post as “100% social link is bad,” but like… there’s something i find really appealing about the messiness of attempting to manage so many relations at once- only to fall short in several of them and attempting to salvage the last bits of their sanity. when you think about the complications of the 100% SL run from the shoes of the protagonist… yeah!! that’s the good shit!

anyways! if anyone knows of any fics with this kinda vibe for the p3/4/5 protags… feel free to drop it in my askbox… i like them all VERY much :3c… and if this raised any food for thought- i’d be equally honored! let the protags go through shit i wanna see their emotions and coping mechanisms damn it! 👏

[muzzleroars]

alright, i looked trough your blog and it is quite fascinating both for original parts of your narrative and how it seems specifically based off of ultrakill plot as of 6-2. with later versions will you plan to edit your AU to fit with new narrative elements or you prefer to keep it true to how it is now?

on the note of newer narrative elements, what is your interpretation for mind of hell? it really does seem that if ultrakill has a true main antagonist then it is hell itself. and with current way how it was characterized it seems to have "inherited" the world from god and is in complete control over current situation. angels are lost without gods plan and just try to make the same motions as before. humanity may have actually been ended by hell's design, even with how much the earths machines act as a force of nature hell seems to comfortably channel them like water and using for its own purposes and entertainment. so far hell restrained itself only for its wins to be more cathartic (various "uprisings" on different layers), and so far is the most in control and very distinctly from everyone else is absolutely enjoying its time

so yeah, i am really curios on your take on hell's mind in both official material and your AU since i saw only very passing mentions for it in your posts

p.s. absolutely love your art, your character designs are immaculate❤️

ooooo good questions tbh...i've definitely thought a lot about what will happen with the au as ultrakill reaches its end and what i'll do about elements obviously becoming unfit compared to the story. i think it really depends on how much it's going to be off, but i will be honest in saying i would have a tough time abandoning my ocs if official versions of michael, raphael, uriel, or lucifer are introduced! i think of course they would be well done and i would actually love to see them in canon, but i think it would cause a divergent au in that case. because i would love to explore how this au might fit into whatever becomes canon, but i've just developed the world and characters too much to leave the au behind as it is now. overall though, i just need to see how it ends and what it introduces to know where i might want to go, if i'd want to do a properly canon-divergent au when everything is said and done, or if i might just...stick with a canon-divergent from 6-2 onward. it's funny bc i actually was nervous about this just with layer 7 dropping, so i can't imagine how anxious i'll be for the last 2 layers! esp with lucifer looming in treachery - i think it's very up in the air if any of the other archangels will play a role in the game at this point, but more about lucifer is highly likely to come imo so!!! it's a big waiting game to find out!!

you're right in that i haven't done too much with hell, though i am interested in it as a character - i have considered it more with lucifer becoming much more of an element in the au, as he has spoken with it constantly and hell is sort of...in love with him, in an abstract way. it views him still as one of the most beautiful works it has, the first bright and radiant thing it had ever seen in its misery, but hell has become utterly engrossed with the cruelty of humanity. while lucifer was some celestial god that fell to it, humanity had minds much like it, and so it fell in love with them in a way it could understand. hell is always searching for more, an artist always looking for inspiration while holding lucifer as its muse. it's the capacity they connect with on the most, both great creators with god's spark in them, and admittedly, in his suffering, lucifer sometimes understood hell's work. but lucifer was secure, lucifer it had always to speak to, but increasingly it whispered the brutality of mankind, the wonderful inventions of their minds and the horrible works of their hands it began to copy. it hooked itself into the terminals they installed, and so lucifer gained all the knowledge of machines through their internal circuit. and when mankind was wiped out, hell became master in a world run by automation with all the creators gone from their servants. it has all it wants, and it indulges in testing its creations upon the machines and the husks of mankind in such tangible joy that an abstract like lucifer could not bring to it. lucifer it relates to in hatred, in his deep, abyssal loathing of the god that trapped him here, but even that is something more abstract to hell than the brutality of humanity - lucifer hates perfectly, he hates with the mind of god, and it is not met precisely by hell as hell was born into what it is.

so what then can hell feel when lucifer is released from it, when the dragon is cut down and its flesh severed from treachery's? this is really where i want to explore the relationship between lucifer and hell, what they are to each other - hell is a take on "this place loves you", but it is entirely malignant, noxious and harmful, while lucifer recognizes it as the hideous creation he fell trying to destroy, yet it is now irrevocably his home, the one entity he now knows. they are tangled up in each other, lucifer in an obvious sense but hell now cannot bear to lose its little spark of god's light. something in his beauty sustains it, it pulls at him constantly now that he's partially left it, and lucifer is stranded not knowing what decision to make. he still hears it speaking to him, esoteric fragments made up of the ambient noise of its body, but what can he do with it now? it is alive, sentient, a being put into a wretched position by god which condemns it for how antithetical it is to the fulfillment of all other creations. lucifer wanted it gone. he protested against it all those eons ago. but now he is frozen by choice, seeing it behave as some evil god yet knowing it cannot be any other way. what is fair then? to find some way to kill it? to cut off whatever constitutes its brain? to reason with it? try to change its very essence? lucifer must work through the possibilities while accepting hell, in so many ways, is the place he now wants to be. free at last, but once more full of despair. how can he kill his home and what might be his only friend? how can he reason with it, when he once tried the same with god and was struck down? how can he change it when he is just a pale shadow of what made something so monstrous in the first place? yet he fears hell will grow angry in its stasis, in running out of victims for its cruelty, and act out in retaliation

[unproduciblesmackdown]

still rotating lsoh in that way of like well it's fun it works well enough where like you know at every turn whatever's happening is supported by Some element coming through as the strength of such material & like the basis of like, you can forget [jrr tolkien voice] the Applicability of the plant when the foundation underneath that is "plant that eats people. would that be fucked up or what" like does it have to be human (i guess) does it have to be mine (i guess not) the answer is if a plant ate people would that be fucked up or what?

the great nexus provided where it's like of course the one "correct" interpretation of The Story here doesn't exist & neither does "here's the way to Present an experience that will be perfect & perfectly interpreted by everyone ever" but it's also Rich Text time enough to have a great time analyzing the workings & results & musing on re- or deconstructions forever. as a "never seen a stage version, only seen the theatrical release movie" i'm like yeah i would blow this whole building up Myself if they die noooo :( no you can't do that and i think it's great that like the full situation is us all having such Multiple versions and that when it's a movie everyone is like well you can't do that. the theory about the difference in medium between stage production & movie for an audience experience, i definitely buy that as a factor. i'm not gonna resolve this in this text post lmao like i'm going "i mean the theatrical ending Also Works, which feels conclusive in its own right, & the issue to me seems like, you know, they're simultaneously standing in for Any/Everyone but just like Any/Everyone they're actually specific people still. if they're not sympathetic then it could be seen as diminishing [don't feed the plants] to [don't do whatever makes them less sympathetic] like rip to your employee but i'm different, i would have done the perfect blood bank heist every other day & done the perfect marketing & then done the perfect plant killing move after doing the perfect planning to know i'd definitely been set for life & making the perfect decision to not let it go on another day & how about another etc"....that no matter how sympathetic you are (and you are, i'd blow this whole building up) don't feed the plants then huh

but. it's a story. we can have different versions and that that's the case even within the [same book] Stage situation, within that no two performances of the same production are The Same, that people sitting in different seats at the same show will have different experiences, notice / focus on different details, have different interpretations because they're different people....i can assume if i'd seen a stage version first i'd go "oh interesting" at the happier ending in the film rather than be like no Noooo the other way around lmfao. again that like, you still get the message. uh oh audrey could've died. uh oh seymour could('ve) die(d) & this plant is malicious & never gonna stop & very hard to kill, we can extrapolate. uh oh is the danger present for anyone? for you? we get it either way so i can't reluctantly give it up lmao. like i get "uh oh the plant even ate them, and You" actually acted out sure can be seen as having more emphasis & clarity. But like also never any absolutes like oh if they live it diminishes that, Maybe in some interpretations, maybe as a matter of preference....but, again, the Tradeoffs coming through. we lose like that emphasis for the rewards of Character. no Metaphor of the plants is ever really gonna shake out, but the tradeoff is always "would that be fucked up or what" and scifi fun.

like, pacing, also just like as ever can't even really declare One Thing for all, for ever, that makes a work a Tragedy, much less the Definitively Successful one or anything. is it tragedy because of tone. because people died. because anything bad enough happened that wasn't undone. because it was "serious" in tone And being "about" something someone deems worth expression / exploration. but always shakespeare problem plays and where does greek tragedy come from & what did it mean & that obviously comedy isn't like there's no consequences, no "substance" or "seriousness" or whatever other supposed metric of Worth by whomever gets to judge that. comedy requiring a level of questioning / analyzing Everything (technically it doesn't, if you do like "comedy is when Some people / things are laughable" which idc about that. Encompassing context / framework or else) and in that there's more room for things that otherwise might be presented as that matter of "tone" defining whether something is "serious." like there's Nothing Unrealistic about from the start it just being matter of fact everyday stuff that audrey's getting beat up but that doesn't make it not "serious" unless the world ground to a halt & everyone else around her fell to their knees. the most serious shit including indeed interpersonal abuse goes on all the time as everyday matter of fact stuff just like that, world still turning, nobody falling to their knees or else it's not that big a deal. again like suppertime sequence is just really ominous lmao like yeah it Would be fucked up if a giant sentient plant ate a person. the horrors of being matter in flux are endless but like "isn't this fucked up" gore or whatever is really never the kind of Vision Of Violence that comes across as half as unpleasantly disturbing as the shit that happens quickly and without much detailed fanfare in my experience/opinion, & this is a bit like that. just spending some time in suspense knowing this plant is gonna eat a guy and then it does, yikes. likewise saying it's memorable like he sure does look like plant food to me, just a what like whole ten second sequence of silhouetted abuse that is perfectly harrowing because we experience audrey's harrowment.

going on a tangent But Not Really and i welcome it, whaddaya gonna do. it's still also more about "these are characters in a story and not Real People but art imitating life style we think of them in the framework as though they're real people. they could be anyone and so could real people, but also, just as with real people, they are specific people" but that like also We're The Audience. we don't have to imagine any particular character or their experiences / pov as "what if this one was me / vice versa" but we also never have to Be these characters b/c we not only Aren't, but they exist to us only As Presented, unlike real people, who exist outside our observation, awareness, assessment. like, real violence happening that isn't only made real by someone outside it standing there Observing, much less necessarily realizing what's going on, nor following it around as it affects someone day to day. the issue of like ""showing"" us in media that someone's been abused. if we see it In Process, it's Not That Bad unless it's supposedly "that bad" all at once, in say like, simply a scene, perhaps merely several, perhaps one episode or movie, etc: and in thusly being "convincing" to an Audience, the reaction can be like "well, obviously it's That Bad. so why would this person put up with it" and the idea that it's the victim's responsibility actually can be accepted, like, since it's so clearly Intolerable, beyond the pale, must be something wrong with Them for tolerating it, if only they'd get it together enough to stand up for themself once & for all. never mind that, yknow, who cares about that, would they deserve this anyways & gosh why is it never about focusing on the people treating them this way. anyways like its leading to "well, couldn't be me" washing your hands of it as you wanted to do anyways. handy if you're presented with Whatever like "oh it's not even that bad anyways" too of course. all versus like, forget what seems "intolerable" like how about "can you escape it. what do you risk happening to you if you try." like people's reactions to Real images of like, someone taking a casual everyday pic of a living situation & it's got a lack of polish that's just like, ordinary Being Poor type of deal. mentioning any detail that's pretty ordinarily a part of that, no matter how they feel about it, and then the way people can have a big reaction like it's perhaps absurd to them in a way inspiring shock, perplexment, rejection/disdain. vs like supposed "oh no, being poor" living situations In Media like, it's either presented as Shocking, the realm of the [omg couldn't be me] consummate Other, or hey, just Not That Bad (i.e. not particularly realistic, just like....maybe shown as less spacious & Interior Designed into relatively sparse detail) like nice just something to vicariously go "how Great (perhaps Of Me, in surely innately being this person who Could Never. i'd never put up with that) that that's so Not Me" like okay, dead end. what if it's not some inviolately Other lower class of inferior Not As Much Of A Person As You people who don't know better or have better taste or better self respect or better moxie or etcccc. then it would ask you not to dehumanize and also it wouldn't end in the realm of Individual Choice as the ultimate / only truly relevant context for "when abuse happens is that fucked up or what"

anyways we can bring it all back to lsoh specifically like it's great they're not like "hope to god nobody's Relating to like, orin, say" like it's not presenting us like well even before you start feeding plants, just don't be jerks, for one. hard to go "rip to your granpa but i'm different" about the applicability focus if we don't go "it'd never apply to Me or otherwise just like, generally" b/c they're up to unsympathetic business. which, also, sidebar, of course i'm not even going "wow, the lesson is Never Murder." like yeah let's kill orin even without the plant, oh well whatever at mr. mushnik lmfao. that also like a whole big thing i think is that lsoh has this clarity about everyone's Broader Situations existing in a context where their individual choices aren't enough to save them from Tragedy, or let them Escape whatever's already shit. like, uh oh, you're already fucked. you don't have family? family's not reliable social support, perhaps including not Not being detrimental / extractive / violent in its own right? well, guess you're fucked. seymour's stuck with this Parent and we see the [your child is your property] there, oh well for him i guess. audrey as A Woman is like well your escape is into being [your wife is your property] and what if he's terrible, oh well, just leave, and do what, and risking what violence to prevent that escape? rewarded with what when you don't have money? both of them having jobs that obviously aren't enough, we aren't presented like "if only they'd been Hardworking enough, or perhaps Savvy enough to be Smartworking" like that'd have Saved them. we Do get like, oh hey, We could be a social unit (i.e., married) lol and it's like well that's a) an option if you want to at all & the genders are deemed proper & b) like well alright lmfao seymour's your friend, great, like that again it doesn't even matter much if it occurred to them like lavender marriage, it's all for the Economic considerations. nor does this really upend the broader context like yeah whew their options are still Limited thusly. this relates right into like yeah get our rod serling Or Is It? ending with Move Into A House type happier ending, but it's also like, of Course there's still limits to what they could do then or at any point, and we'd kind of have to "break out" to have it be anything But some version of like, "yeah nice now we can afford to not live on the street, definitely." which we can do, feasibly lol, just in a way that i think would be less readily conveyed as "okay they'll be fine enough now, we prommy, probably, or will they???" so [yep, that's a Conclusion] for the purposes of a film

when like it goes back to the Inciting Incident, like, well, what are seymour or audrey gonna do out here otherwise? they're in this context where we understand their only escape is [have money] and they're doing that how they can, with jobs, and a guy who'll let them live inside shelter. from this point like i guess they can become revolutionaries but there wouldn't be a "if there was a big plant that talks and eats people would that be fucked up or what" plotline. they can't even go "hey, what if We got married! we could both live somewhere with a roof & walls & not be awful to each other" without more money, probably, and probably without still killing orin (i think this is a great what if lmao. no plant, yes murder). and like then there's consumerism like you have to be told that everything wrong with your life and everything that can possibly be right can be resolved through purchase, audrey ii is advertising for a business, and i mean, stays that [increasing demand, increasing sales] until it's like uhh. quick foray into "actually now there's this [As A Famous Person] interlude where the celebrity is themself not a person but a Product, and in this case likewise now kind of framed as potential advertising for Other products as audrey ii remains for the flower shop until the Cuttings As Product twist" and like even at that point it's like, metaphorically [wow audrey ii is a product] doesn't exactly hold up, [audrey ii is consumerism] is Right There like literal consumption for one lmao and i hardly think like "oh it's not a perfect fit? throw it out" applies here when No metaphor is that, and again like, we do have literal consumerism, audrey framing her ideal life as available for sale to her via magazines, clear [hm, socioeconomics] framing like hm they sure Do just need money or they're fucked, this plant keeps trying to fuck them, illustration of a shift of contextual power from sexual solicitation to aggression (but it was aggressive the whole time also just as it was also the whole time a threateningly giant sentient plant demanding human flesh)

anyways also consumerism like [increasing consumption of goods is always desirable] relevant like ah Infinite Growth you say? that you can go "it's like 'why would vampires want more vampires when that's a dead end lol of someone who stops producing blood' / 'vampires would just run out of humans'" but when it's also like, well haha, irl Application style, wow why would people adopt a practice of "uh oh lol, This isn't sustainable and there'll always be some crash. well not my problem" like yeah audrey ii & clones taking over the world Infinite Growth would hit a wall lmao but doesn't mean uh oh it's not Now breaking through the wall eating Me, in the audience....and you can see the application to like, any Relationship between anyone & anything that apparently requires Infinite Growth, only ever More, only ever a one way process of Extraction for unilateral benefit. and also it's always like, major overlap with the Consumerism but still also a bit different: audrey ii like Commodification. it's just a strange & interesting little venus flytrap, until it's indirectly commodified at least as Business Advertisement, making the other plants into successful commodities. (also shoutout to that one guy. i can see the theory now like he was a plant of the plants to make sure audrey ii would be valuable and nourished. wouldn't change anything at all like, sure, or no, it's Style and Humor, he's a stock Some Guy & it's comedy, nobody's """normal""", unquestioned unexamined "normality" doesn't exist here thank fuck.) but you know, it's like, oh you like botany? well you'd better figure out a way to get rich from that, right. oh you're a Woman, you'd better figure out how to Be the commodity to an extra degree beyond the wage laborer, All domestic work has to be done for free or as close to it as possible, vs paid a bit more for a "job" proper, with the precarities still increasing / decreasing according to different systems of creating classes.

(such as like, see "what about the vampires as like origins in what vulnerable Othered parties are seen as infiltrators that corrupt / kill?" and that class necessarily exists in the socioeconomic context of lsoh, we don't get suburbs without Selling them like "ugh you know the poorer not white and even black people in cities? what if you could access the cities without having to live amongst them, share any resources, as though Equals" and you can try some like libertarian white supremacist analysis like don't feed the plants? white man's burden and eugenics and it's white people struggling for Control that will keep black people out and not killing you and etc. naturally any metaphor falls apart, in what we see there's no particular separation of seymour &/or audrey as inherently other from those poorer than them (although like having poorer people's existence as a "this could be you" ""threat"" requires emphasizing the perspective that, for now, you are Not them) and they're not posited as threatened by proximity / mutual access / equivalency to nonwhite / black people around them, we can infer that Racism Time as an interpretation is not Intended lol but analysis never has to end with inferred or expressed intent, and little concepts like Classes of race, gender, owner vs property, etc aren't Neutral where they're relevant, such as in not just a story set in any twentieth century US city, but Any story say, produced From a perspective that invokes that as Known, any story experienced where we as audience Know of these contexts. all the "normality" of every ideology alleging someone in a group you are impermeably separated from has to stay Other in their systemic subjugation or else everything you have (your elevated status in this very context) will be destroyed, everyone being taught said ideologies, it's not simply "normal" unless & until someone does intentionally explicitly invoke "it's racism time" & racism all over the place, ah, a simple Fiction, unless someone is a woman without explaining why, perhaps openly queer, disabled, nonchristian, nonwhite? why'd you have to make it political. we can just Say like, i suppose this extraterrestrial plant is doing some colonialism. easy. indeed it is some Other, here for infinite growth, eating people like would that be fucked up or what, voiced by a black man, watch this maneuver: even disabled in the context of being effectively a person once introduced as such. everything we can consider when presented with an invading incontrovertible malicious Other, which is Much. rich texts, hooray

but back to the commodification point. you love botany, how can you monetize it? so that it can save you, by way of money, b/c how else can you be saved? also makes me think of [audrey ii as some form of what would be considered Art]. that for art to bring the theoretical Individual Creator Artist Responsible power in the form of money &/or status, for it to be thusly vauable art, the artist has to draw (as in, extract) from their life, from Themself, put themself into it, literally in this case. then potentially have to turn to what access they have to Other people as sources of what made that Successful. but uh oh how do you keep that going forever, when you only have access to so much, when the success / exposure / demand changes everything that made it possible to quietly feed some blood to a weird little plant in a basement in the first place, much less has the Life Of Its Own and is too big for one person / escapes containment in that way. not to say in the least like ah indeed i believe in True Art(tm) and the status of true Artist(tm) or some extrapolation like wow uhh you start with a Woman as your Muse & have a cute little plant & give it a Little blood of course, that's fine, just stop there i guess or you might end up with Mass Media and that's awful....our culture and your kitcsh, our technique and your crafts, our "the 'ideal' (true) artist not worrying about making money off of it" vs "the uncouth impoverished that Does make 'art' for money (or entertainment, the Masses, any other randos, vs the true arbiters & appreciators as selected audience) and if they come up with anything good it was on accident really and we'll just be taking that thank you. ironically. for now" like i also don't think the metaphor goes oh so far here But. the idea that "good" art that'll be valued & bring money, status, Save You, has to have like your blood put into it, You and Your life, or start looking to other people around you whose lives overlap with yours also....could read further into it from that lens, but again really just like Commodification more generally, seymour's personal passion for botany that is thus far outside the flower shop but now he can finally make it be Useful in that it'll bring in money, gotta point to That same as audrey dreaming of products she can Own as concomitant with her ideal life as [pointing to Consumerism]. infinite growth, what if the pyramid scheme never stops, [the ride never ends I Want To Get Off Eternal Damnation post] etc etc

uh well anyways bring it WAY back around, i'm not agreeing to "tragedy is when you go Oh No" like well sometimes it's tragedy and i Don't lmao. sometimes i go Oh No and it's not tragedy. and of course there's no consensus like ah decisively both defined & bounded Genre, format, even medium. i can't relinquish like "b/c i'd go Oh No even harder if they died, i'm [dying ending only] now" lmao ofc i know no one demands picking one or certainly i wouldn't respect such demands nor comply. it's the power of "this is a story and it can be told different ways" like, we can Get the same points even when they don't. it's not like "oh, consumerism can go on forever just fine then" when a) we get a rod serling Or Can It? too anyways and b) we also know and always know these are, in theory, and Would Be in practice if we understand the context of [as if this was Real Life], specific people, not Everybody, now & forever. audrey ii is the pyramid scheme infinite growth inherently unilateral extraction violence consuming capitalism? like well we all feed the plants at all. we can't draw a line Anywhere, such as: when is the financial success too much? the Process of putting the personal into a product form too personally costly for you or anyone? back to like "no you can't control this, yes this will always corrupt & consume no matter who you are or your intentions and sympatheticness or whatever" like then the Metaphor / Applicability being universal, like, even You, aaah it's getting You in the audienceeee is like yep i get that Strength of that [everyone dies. You die] ending lmao. but the strength of They're Specific People [handshake] they live, you live, but still watch out, still, it's not over ending. like you know that other person in reality? that's you, extremely important, however it's also not you, just as extremely important. this tale of these specific people, like, their escape from situations including [interpersonal abuse, we don't need to See one big show of supposedly intolerable, outward suffering; whose life is constrained, who has the power, who can't escape], well they're fucked if they don't have money, so there's only so much [you Failed the cautionary tale so bad you gotta die] like, if they don't, if they only have So Much success and then wanna back out, and then realize like ohh right it's not gonna stop on its own & will also Worsen....like okay lol. how much Difference in "uh oh audrey could've been mortally wounded i guess, good thing she wasn't. Not Today" or "seymour's gotta try to kill it, so he does try. and he succeed. Today, In Fact" like yknow he could try to kill it from the inside and get eaten and we're like aaaa and Then the plant explodes b/c well, he did it, was willing to risk it after realizing the situation, same as we get in the happier theatrical ending. ("theatrical" having some ambiguity...musical theatre....i mean the film though lol)

like that it Can't be conclusive re: some theoretical perfect combination of intention, execution, interpretation. it Is this story. they Are [anyone] they Are [my specific friend seymour. i'll kill for him too] like it's more emphatic a Concept to have whatever worst case scenario, most permanent loss, vs that like, prefer the Practical instead: how much could they do? how much can you do? when it is also constrained by: they have to do the things that facilitate there being a giant talking alien plant that eats people and would that be fucked up or what? when like rather if there was no plant, i think a heist with these two zany besties where the heist is murdering orin and perhaps like ah sorry you do also know too much mr. mushnik is like, well you know that story could happen with these two characters and their personalities and be so much fun. audrey would walk in on that ax murder and start helping. the Medium Difference idk like yeah i'll help them kill whoever, i'll kill that plant, that it's also fiction and magic so of course we can't go "alas....isn't that always the way, it Has to be" like no he could blow it up. no he could kill it from the inside anyways. The Power Of Fiction, always gonna be living that "they both live or i blow the building up" life lol. while simultaneously like i even theoretically get it like no yeah of course they die, is someone else's primary Story ending. while this doesn't change my like No you can't kill them. when because it is a story and not something that actually happened and we're just able to be thinking about Meaning and Effects from something that only exists as a way of communicating an idea of Meaning and Effects like of course it's a multiple choice multiple answers deal, and having multiple versions spices that up

which also. that again like when it is not real life. difficult to pick something of more Impact / Significance than mortality, & Dying as [difficult to think of a more significant Mortality Moment], but like, again in juxtaposing art vs real life like Real death not happening Only to have "meaning" besides that uh oh everyone's mortal and someone just died, in fact. while we don't read meaning into things Only if someone dies for real, even when of course that tends to be interpreted as having import. art imitating life like, of course "don't do this. they did it and died" having impact that perhaps "don't do this. they survived though" doesn't, is gonna be an Interpretation. but there's of course never gonna be actual rules. like oh Always kill them in a cautionary tale. someone like "Wrong never have an actual other being in the cave horror. the cave is one's self, the scariest journey of all" like well i disagree. here we are where to get Us eaten by the plant we have the protagonists eaten by the plant, vs that they'd better not be, while it's not about us. separation from [that is a movie] vs [on stage in front of me? yes, i'm already a part of this] yeah sure maybe i dunno. being closer up? the plant can intrude on the audience like fall from the ceiling and change joe iconis's life but like, a Movie sequence of a plant outgrowing a city and world and even also implicitly fourth wall breaking like, that's not my business. the stakes weren't really raised there in an unbroken sequence from our heroes' demises playing Directly into a finale dropped in the audience's laps that way. i don't know. and what were they gonna do, am i right? i'll kill this vine. hang on besties....like you did make them my friends. we can go "no don't kill them, because of the concepts" and we can go "no don't kill them, because of the concepts, and also they're my friends," truly, while having grasped the [because of the concepts] either way

anyways, amidst the power of [there's no Conclusivity here. yaaay conclusivity as not even the Goal in the first place] whew like how much blood have i put into this one? none. but also addendums. i forgot to musically mention that somewhere that's green opening with that "i know seymour's the greatest...but i'm dating a semi...sadist..." like holy shit lmao superlative right there. addendum that take it way back to the beginning like "so they're fucked if they Don't successfully get more money. or end capitalism" like they go lihn mode. but who says they don't? in this story? already, they Do, the endings aren't that different even as of course it Is that different saying the pretend people's pretend actions in a pretend situation killed them, or didn't. happy ending Or Is It? it's a tuesday like haha oh come here look at this, shaking my head. killing the little plant and hitting the road, the airwaves, with [knife emoji We're Coming For You invasive plant (that eats people)] goals. anything could happen. and it's not that big a deal if they Then just did make money and happen to have more choice in their lives, like, that was the context all along lmao. and, again, if we just kill some mfs ordinary style. seymour as "aw jeez" about it but ya gotta do what you gotta do. which is relevant to like, i also hardly think like oh no it's about the slippery slope of murder. not even once. just say no. & your divine retribution will be eaten by plant, otherwise. he do kinda gotta do, sure, yeah, it's not very meaningful like "i think he could've talked it out & had orin see the light" nor "if i was seymour i would've ingeniously generated flower shop business in the wisest way, free of cost. economics" or otherwise rip but i'm different i would've gotten money in a non feed the plant way, i would've gotten complete control of my life without getting more money, ha ha....take the risk like well gotta try to kill this plant, oh wait, i did, happy ending, maybe there's more out there, dealing with them forever / at any time? sure, maybe! ask musical be more chill all about it.

i had another addendum but while not irrelevant it's also like, truly a whole tangent & maybe i don't have the wherewithal for it at this juncture. so instead yknow tl;dr much to wrestle with like as art imitating life like nobody's "doomed" like the characters died because you had that happen. in reality there were also reasons people died and there was a context that is only their "doom" if drawing a line and washing our hands of it. is a doom we supposedly share as an audience but feel more separated from in thee cinema more cathartic or whatever. whereas if our besties died without us it's like i'm blowing this whole building up, you can't make me was my hands of them and understand myself as Separate, Other, Couldn't Be Me? we may ask ourselves. and idk look at our little guys yknow it's like yeah you can't do this sorry. how do we do it with stage little guys? i don't know, having experienced such neither First nor Ever. tragic deaths, you only don't actually care, or it's like, hey. no. are they So Us that they're Too doomed by dying? idk but of course the success in being upset about it either way. failure is if i don't give a shit, don't have fun & be myself along the way

[hells-greatestdad]

11, 20, 21, 29,

would you be interested into playing with doubles?

As I understand the question, this means... other Lucifers? I mean. I could. I haven't so far.

One hurdle to this is I get really bad duplicate anxiety. I may like someone's interpretation of Lucifer (regardless if it matches my own or not), and I may even take notes, cuz there's definitely food for thought to be had.

But even if I really really like someone's take on him, I end up playing the comparison game and it honestly takes a toll. So it's pretty rare that I even follow another Lucifer.

what’s a ship you don’t want to roleplay at all with this muse? (except Bad Illegal And Gross Stuff, of course)

I mean, I can't really think of a no-no off the top of my head.

I am rather attached to my headcanon that he is exclusively heterosexual. Not because I'm homophobic (like no, I'm demi-homoromantic myself, the one person I've ever had romantic feelings for is a woman), but.... everyone else ships him with other men, so I just wanna be different.

what do you think of your muse’s popular fandom ship?

Pretty sure that's radioapple....

I started out mildly liking it tbh. Not to the degree of shipping it, but then I think cuz I'm on the aromantic spectrum that I don't actually ship things without a deeper motivation?

In all honesty, fandom attitude surrounding that has turned me off to radioapple. And I hate that, cuz it makes me feel like I'm being kinda mean. But.... yeah.

what are your honest thought about your muse’s canon?

I mean.... canon hasn't done anything to piss me off yet. I don't have any issues with his canon.

This ain't a Dragon Ball Super situation where they made a fucking cash grab show that ignores established shit from 30 years ago and makes the main character a mere shadow of his former glory while flandarizing the absolute shit out of him.

At least.... not yet. And hopefully never.

....whew. I think my bitterness towards modern Dragon Ball content came out a bit there.

[themuse-if]

Another 20 (or so) Questions with Karla Reyes

Interviewer: Welcome to another installment of our character interviews, where we dive deep into the lives and minds of our favorite cast members of The Muse. Today, we have Karla Reyes with us, our musically inclined painter. Karla, thank you for joining us. Could you start by telling us what made you want to pursue Studio Arts?

Karla: Hey, thanks for having me. So you know how they always have kids finger painting in preschool, well that was my favorite part of every day. As I got older and was allowed to just select an elective I always chose art. My high school art teacher Mr. Davis was really cool. He always had music playing in class, usually just instrumental stuff, but the music always fit the vibe and really influenced my work.

Interviewer: Describe your art, particularly your watercolor work, in your own words.

Karla: *gets thoughtful* Mmm I enjoy movement and the human form. The way that color can really set the tone, like the image could be the same, but if I use a different color palette it completely changes the direction of the piece. And music, usually my palette is found in songs. The tone provides me an array of colors and the rhythm gives the piece movement. Does that make sense?

Interviewer: I think so. How do you want to be seen by others?

Karla: I want to be seen as someone who is...natural. Like I hope people see who I am authentically. I'm a big believer in letting things play out and just existing in a way that isn't forced.

Interviewer: So just very go with the flow, I see. And how do you want your art to be seen by others?

Karla: Ok...that's not really easy to answer. Obviously everyone interprets art differently, as they should, but I think all I can ask for is that they feel something. I don't ever want someone to see my work and just think aww how pretty, I want them so actually feel something. It could be thought provoking, sensual, dark, lively, humorous. I just want people to see more than a beautiful object, I want them to take something away from it.

Interviewer: Of course, no artist wants people to view their work in a shallow way. What traits do you value most in a friend?

Karla: I'm pretty relaxed so I am usually drawn to people who are more outgoing. As long as someone has a good vibe and they're drama free then I think we can be friends.

Interviewer: Sounds simple enough. What is your latest obsession?

Karla: Nothing new really just the usual. I've been working on a new collection centered around love and heartache. It's not for an assignment or anything, I'm just trying to work through some stuff and painting is my favorite outlet.

Interviewer: You've told me some things you look for in a friend, but could you describe your ideal best friend?

Karla: Someone who is creative and outgoing, who shares my love for art and music. I value honesty and authenticity in a friend, someone that I feel comfortable with. It should be natural and effortless.

Interviewer: And what about your ideal partner?

Karla: *sighs* Should have seen that one coming. Usually I go for people that are sweet and bubbly. I'm a bit more chill and I just find people like that really refreshing, like rain on a hot summer day.

Interviewer: Aww that's actually really cute. What was your first kiss like?

Karla: It was pretty normal a quick peck with my best friend. We were in middle school and it was awkward we never talked about it after.

Interviewer: And have you ever been in love?

Karla: Oh god...I really hate this question. Yes I have been in love. I don't really want to go into detail.

Interviewer: Ok then, when was your last relationship, and why did it end?

Karla: Come on. You're killing me here. As I'm sure you already know I broke up with Faye at the end of last spring semester. It wasn't because I didn't love her or that she stopped loving me. It just all felt too complicated and neither of us are really good with conflict. I miss her like hell though, but I think this space is for the best. Like I wish we could have made it work, but I think we both just need some time to focus on ourselves.

Interviewer: I feel like you only gave me half an answer, but I won't press you I can tell you would prefer not to go into to much detail. Ok next question. What’s your ideal Friday night?

Karla: My ideal Friday night is pretty simple, friends, food, and live music. Just a nice night surrounded by my favorite things.

Interviewer: What’s the last song you listened to?

Karla: "Young Love" by Cleo Sol.

Interviewer: How do you behave in a relationship?

Karla: I try to be open and communicative, but as I've learned I really struggle with conflict. It's hard for me to 100% trust my partner if I feel like that trust has been broken. Honestly I just don't like drama, I kind of shut down if things start to feel off.

Interviewer: Interesting. Do you approach those you’re interested in or let them come to you?

Karla: It depends on the situation. I'm open to both approaches, but I think it's important to be genuine and authentic in any interaction.

Interviewer: What is your biggest pet peeve?

Karla: I can't stand people who are arrogant or disrespectful. I believe in treating others with kindness and respect.

Interviewer: What do you notice first about a person?

Karla: *chuckle and tucks her hair behind her ear* Their laugh. Some people laugh with their who body while others let out just a tiny giggle. I dunno I feel like you can tell a lot about a person by how they express their joy.

Interviewer: Aww that's really cute, and so true. Ok time for our last question. What did you dream about last night?

Karla: *gets a twinkle in their eye* Honestly I'd rather not say. Dreams can be very personal...if you know what I mean. *chuckles* So I'll just let you use your imagination.

Interviewer: *clears their throat* Oh uh, I see. Well that's all the time we have for today. Thank you so much for coming in and sharing more of your story with us!

[bells-of-black-sunday]

1, 11, 29, 36 ( whichever muse you feel most similar to )

Munday Asks | Accepting

1. at what age did you start RPing?

8 or 9??? I was still in elementary school and I'm turning 23 in like a month- so it's been a long while.

11. would you be interested into playing with doubles?

Absolutely! I think one thing that's really interest about Danny is that he comes from a franchise where there's always multiple g.hostfaces, so I think it's really neat to see how everyone takes his lore and bends it. Same with anyone else on my muse list, d.bd's lore is really up for interpretation a lot of the time just due to the nature of the Entity being a weird cosmic god no one really knows anything about, so lore is just told through memories which do have gaps and it's fun to explore those gaps.

29. what are your honest thought about your muse’s canon?

I'm going to be entirely honest and say, I love Ritos world building, but their lore makes no sense no matter how many times they retcon or say everything is cannon, the lore team is just so disorganized they get their own cannon dates mixed up. That and with a lot of lore being told in game through events makes it so you have to find outside sources to read it which makes so pieces inaccessible. I'm hoping the mmo they're developing will keep the lore all in one place instead of scattered, but who knows what's even going on with that at this point.

On the other hand: D.bd's lore may not be nearly as messy, but it's even more inaccessible. You can read all the bios and times you want, but that still won't give you the big picture of what's going on and terms of characters like the Legion it just makes their lore even more confusing. The devs used to do lore Q&A streams every month, but they stopped doing those and even then those would say conflcting information. An example being they said everyone in the Legion is 18 and over then they switched to everyone is 21+, but Susie's school day cosmetic still says she's a sophomore.

That's not even counting characters like Danny where is biography is him reading about his own murders, but if you go to his chapter description on the steam page or watch his announcement video it tells you things about him that should've been in that biography. Tarhos's lore is a mess where they both want him to be this super violent only is having fun when there's blood on his hands and his ears are ringing, but he'll lament to Vittorio about how he hates senseless violence and killing people for other men's egos. It's very messily written for what I can only assume is lore re-writes from him initially being a F.or H.onor chapter.

Oh and the maps have lore. They all do, but it can only be read in the custom games setting menu where you can select maps. Every add on has a quick lore thing that are sometimes really important. Killer powers sometimes have important lore things too, archives, cosmetics etc. etc. everything has something written on it that makes it important lore wise down to how every blighted cosmetic is a thing that happened in lore. And if I remember correctly every cosmetic is something both survivors and killers actually own too. (another Q&A I think)

It makes it really hard to get into and try to piece together what's actually happening in lore vs what's just for fun and I can only imagine how much harder it is for new players trying to get into it since I started playing and I started playing around the time Blight came out.

36. do you feel similar to your muse in any way?

I feel like when you're passionate enough about a character you write a bit of yourself into them no matter how much you try not to, so even muses I have that are horrendous of people like Danny or Karth, I can relate to different aspects of them. I too have a love for writing and story crafting and I too also think death customs are really fascinating. They just take those to a whole different extreme of course, but they're both interests I have and enjoy writing about.

[venus-haze]

could you perhaps tell more about the fics you’re working on? i love your writing i look forward to anything you post🫶🏼

I have a few so they'll be under the cut, but these are the fics that are currently in progress or I have plans to write (featuring Vincent Sinclair, Bo Sinclair, Severen Van Sickle, Father Paul Hill).

Also I have to thank you for sending this because I was fucking struggling with one major aspect of my Vincent fic and while I wrote out a whole bitchfest about it, the idea came to me lol. Thank you for the kind words about my writing too🖤

Vincent:

This is the one I swear I've been working on forever because I can't find myself being satisfied with what I've written.

Unbeknownst to the reader and Bo (who are constantly at each other's throats) but will be revealed in the fic of course, Vincent decides to keep the reader as his muse. As you try to figure out why Vincent chose you and how you can use that to your advantage to escape, you find yourself being pushed to your limits mentally and physically in the name of art. Vincent's also a major perv because his view of the artist/muse relationship is extremely warped by his upbringing, his own interpretations of different artist/muse relationships, and his deep loneliness and desire for love despite his appearance.

Bo:

Kind of a spiritual successor to Howl and Adam Raised a Cain where the reader works at the gas station with Bo and actually has to kill victims. Messy and guilty and emotional.

This one I literally just came up with when I reblogged that In the Mood for Love gifset because it's one of my all-time favorite movies and I'm bastardizing the hell out of it with this idea. The reader lived in Ambrose, but your family moved just before the sugar mill shut down. You and Bo knew each other back then, not necessarily friends, but how could you not know each other in such a small town. You unexpectedly reunite when your husband gets a new job back in Louisiana and in the town near Ambrose where Bo makes his supply runs. Bo being charming and disconcerting enough over weeks of coffee "dates" for you to agree to go with him to the Sinclair house for dinner while your husband's out of town on a business trip for old times' sake. Your hometown is a lot different than you remember.

Severen:

Okay, I started writing one fic with the intention of it being a standalone thing, but then I wanted to write the background of Severen turning you for my own sake, so it'll probably be two fics coming out of this idea. ANYWAY the gist is Severen crashes your girls' night out with Diamondback and Mae because what's a party (massacring and incinerating a bar of unsuspecting patrons) without your clingy, show-off mate showing up.

Father Hill:

I feel like this premise sounds kinda cheesy Hallmark romcom on the surface, but I promise it'll be as uncomfortable and gory as I can make it. You quit your corporate job and buy a home on Crockett Island for dirt cheap, having come into money from a source that makes you feel extremely guilty but you refuse to disclose to anyone. You decide in your self-imposed isolation to try your hand at art after giving up the hobby not long after you started working in corporate America. Since Crockett Island is so fucking small and new people almost never move onto the island, everyone's interest is piqued, but especially Father Paul's when he discovers you're a lapsed Catholic with a sin that threatens to consume you. The two of you have extremely different interpretations of your interactions over the weeks, but it's too late to turn back when you discover the darkness that lurks within the parish, courtesy of the pastor himself.