#(bc I don’t like you like that of course pfft why else)

[noahtally-famous]

world tour except it’s seastar

[realcube]

secretly dating the haikyuu!! boys 🤫

summary: you’ve been dating your partner in secret up until now, when their team finds out 

characters: hinata, oikawa & bokuto 

thanks to anon for the request 💗

tw// fem! reader, sexual references, swearing

Shōyō Hinata 

he kept the relationship a secret bc of noya IEFBEVAGLEB

ok ok lemme explain

you said jokingly once that you were into shorter guys in response to hinata asking something lovey-dovey along the lines of ‘what did i do to deserve you? 😍’

and hinata has been on edge ever since pfft

i mean, he just thins noya is such a cool guy and an awesome upperclassmen- why wouldn’t you want him?

but he couldn’t afford losing you to this teammate so he did everything in his power to make sure that you never crossed paths with nishinoya- which included not telling his team about you 

it was so hard for him as well bc he wanted to show you off to his teammates so bad especially stinkyshima 🥺

but he couldn’t :((

you never really inquired about it though, even when he’d get all weird when you’d come pick him up from practise

then the faithful day arrived, when kageyama watched you stroll into the class, hand hinata something, place a kind kiss on his cheek before taking your leave

he didn’t question it though- he couldn’t be bothered lol

the only time he ever brought it up was 2 weeks later in the changing room when tsukishima was making fun of him for being unable to ask out a girl for an upcoming dance

so kageyama retorted with ‘it’s not like you get any girls either, shittyshima! even hinata gets more action than you!’

hinata’s blood ran cold and he froze

tsukishima hummed in response, prodding kageyama to elaborate, ‘i saw him kissing a girl in class the other day-- have you ever kissed someone before?’

although that last part was meant to be a dig, it sounded more like a genuine question

yamaguchi peered over his shoulder to join the conversation, ‘is that true, hinata?’

hinata stood frozen for a little while longer before releasing a heavy sigh, ‘yes. but please don’t tell anyone else.’

‘why not?’ tsukishima pried.

‘none of your business, stinkyshima!’

that nickname was what prompted tsukishima to stroll out of the changing the room and disguise ‘hinata has a girlfriend’ behind a cough in front of the whole team

‘you said you weren’t going to tell anyone!’ hinata yelled, slightly red from the fact everyone was now staring at him - including coach ukai, takeda, kiyoko & yachi

‘what? it was just a cough.’ tsukishima snickered but promptly received an elbow to the stomach from yamaguchi

daichi rubbed hinata’s back while reassuring him that he didn’t have to tell them anything he didn’t want to but meanwhile, hinata’s eyes were fixated on nishinoya 

‘i- i do have a girlfriend.’ he stuttered, figuring that he wasn’t going to be able to hide it forever  — plus, he felt foolish for not trusting you to begin with. ‘her name is (l/n).’

yachi choked on her water, ‘she sits next to me in class!’

ngl yachi probably had a lil’ crush on you at some point but these are just headcanons, not a full blown fic so i cba to write a love triangle

‘cool’ hinata murmured in response before continuing, ‘she said that she will come see me after practise today so i guess you’ll see her then.’

by now, most people were shooting hinata comforting smiles and muttering their congratulations but those were all drowned out by nishinoya and tanaka’s loud offers

‘wow, hinata. you really got a chick before your senpais. i’m not sure whether to be proud or jealous!’ tanaka said, wiping an invisible tear from his eye

‘proud, ryū! we clearly did a good job in teaching him how to make advances on the ladies.’ nishinoya cheered before turning to grab hinata’s shoulders and pull him close, ‘now, hinata, if you ever need advice remember that you can come to us! we’re kinda professionals when it comes to relationships and stuff!’

hinata nodded rapidly, his lips slowly curling into a smile as he wondered; what was i so worried about? of course (y/n) would never cheat on me and noya would never make moves on my girlfriend

when you arrived, you were rather confused when hinata greeted you with his usual vigour rather than his hasty, rushed greetings for when you met him after practise

also, you were perplexed as to why many peeping eyes were staring at the pair of you from the gym door as he peppered your face with kisses - and why was one of them Yachi?

‘uuh, shō, are those your teammates?’ you inquired, gesturing to the peepers behind y’all

hinata peered over his shoulder and chuckled at how ‘discreet’ they were being,’uh- yeah.’

suddenly, yachi and sugawara popped out from behind the walls, ‘hello, (l/n)!’ they both yelled in unison

you smiled, looking at them and realising this was probably the first time you’ve ever been acknowledged by his teammates

‘hi, yachi and--’

hinata hastily whispered in your ear, ‘sugawara.’

‘sugawara!’

hinata finally got to introduce you to all his teammates and he was so hyped 

he had a foolishly wide grin on his face the whole time 

he’s just so happy that the person he loves can finally meet the people who help him do what he loves 

Tōru Oikawa

y’all kept the relationship secret bc you didn’t want to get nasty glares from oikawa’s fangirls and he didn’t want to get teased by iwa so it was a win/win

although you had to be cautious when showing PDA, it didn’t mean y’all didn’t do it at all

there was just something about knowing that what you were doing was risky, which made you want to do it even more

so sometimes y’all would do that thing where you arrange certain times to ask for the bathroom during class so you could see each other in the corridor

and since it was during class, there was virtually nobody else in the hallway 

so y’all would literally just go for it

kissing as if you had never experienced human affection before

but since you both were so into it, you’d never notice kyōtani walk by, on his way back from the principal’s office

he’d even let out a low scoff every time

but you were both just so in the moment that you’d never even notice 

word spreads fast in the seijoh boys’ volleyball club, though

but slightly slower when it starts with kyōtani

like what reason does he have to tell anybody about what he saw? he doesn’t want to relive those events

but during a bitching session with yahaba, he spilled about oikawa and you since the captain had been working them extra hard lately, as if he was the coach tsk

so ofc the gossip spread across multiple bitching session from yahaba, to kunimi, to kindaichi, to watari, to hanamaki then finally to matsukawa

(iwaizumi didn’t get to know bc firstly he didn’t join in with bitching sessions and secondly, everyone knew that iwa would just immediately tell oikawa and that would ruin all the fun)

it got to the point where almost everyone on the team knew about you and oikawa so whenever he would walk into practise, a chorus of low giggles and whispers would spread across the gym

this had been going on for about a month now and at first, oikawa was too self-indulged to notice

but after a bit longer, he kinda noticed and brought it up to iwaizumi

‘hey, why does everyone start acting weird whenever i walk into the room?’

iwaizumi rolled his eyes, shoving a ball against oikawa’s chest, ‘what? no, they don’t; stop being so paranoid. now, throw me some sets.’

that was enough reassurance for oikawa to ignore it for a while but then hanamaki accidentally made one of the jokes a bit too loud

oikawa fell face first into the gym floor after tripping over his lace and the whole gym seemed to erupt into laughter

‘hah!’ matsukawa wheezed, ‘stop kissin’ the ground, tōru!’ 

‘mwah, mwah!’ yahaba teased

hanamaki suddenly chimed in, ‘yeah, save that shit for (y/n)!--’

silence spread like a plague across the whole gym room

it was only broken when iwaizumi let out a clueless, ‘huh?’

oikawa quickly scurried onto his feet, ‘how do you know about (y/n)?’

hanamaki chuckled awkwardly as he looked left to right for help but was just met by blank stares, ‘uh- she’s- erm, in my homeroom class.’

obviously, oikawa didn’t buy it

‘who told you about me and (y/n)?’ he inquired in a sinister tone of voice, his glare seeming anything but kind 

‘watari!’ he yelled accusingly, pointing his index finger at the poor libero 

after all eyes shifted onto him, watari wasted no time in redirecting everyone’s attention onto kindaichi, ‘it was turnip-head who told me!’

‘well, it was kunimi that told me!’ kindaichi shouted with no hesitation

kumini crossed his arms over his chest, ‘yahaba told me.’

yahaba’s eyes widened at the sudden accusation before turning to oikawa and defending himself, ‘mad dog was the one that saw you and (y/n) kissing in the hallway!’

mad dog glared at the pinch server, then turned to oikawa and shrugged 

oikawa was livid DIUVBEVILS

‘YOU ALL KNEW ABOUT ME AND (Y/N) BUT DIDN’T TELL ME?! HOW LONG HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN GOSSIPING ABOUT US FOR?!’

yahaba took it upon himself to reply, ‘mad dog only told me about a month ago-’

‘THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR A WHOLE MONTH?!’

faint hums of ‘yeah’ and ‘uhuh’ were heard across the gym hall

‘wait-’ iwaizumi cocked his head to the side, ‘are you dating (y/n)?’

this inquiry was only met by blank stares as oikawa pinched his temple, wondering what he should do now

‘why did you try to hide your relationship for so long?’ kindaichi asked before kunimi added, ‘yeah, can we finally meet her?’ 

matsukawa rolled his eyes, ‘she literally goes to our school; meet her in the hallway or something.’

oikawa shook his head, quickly shutting down matsukawa’s idea, ‘i’ll ask her to come over after practise today but be on your best behaviour.’ he sung, quickly grabbing a ball and going back to practising receives

everyone was rather shocked at how fast the captains’ demeanour changed

while you were at your own club, you got a message from oikawa asking if you wanted to meet his team

you had already met most of them outside of volleyball but you figured now was perhaps a good time to introduce yourself as oikawa’s gf to rub it in /j

before you arrived, oikawa made it explicitly clear that they weren’t to tell anybody about the relationship or else oikawa’s fangirls would come for you

they all agreed and patiently waited for you to arrive

honestly, iwaizumi was probably the only one with pure intentions when it came to finally meeting you — as he simply wanted to see the girl who has oikawa’s heart

the rest of them of the other hand 🙄

matsukawa and hanamaki planned to have a competition to see who could seduce you first 

watari, kindaichi and kunimi wanted to just tease oikawa in front you 

and yahaba was going to try get you to tell him all the gossip about oikawa 😈

(kyōtani left early)

so needless to say you were hardly charmed when you formally met the bunch of boys oikawa spends his time with 

‘so are you free tonight orrr?’ hanamaki questioned, promptly getting a slap to the back of the head from both oikawa and matsukawa

‘makki, a lady like her shouldn’t be spoken to like that,’  matsukawa pushed his friend aside, ‘watch this: hey, sweetie. what is a gal--’

matsukawa got the same treatment as makki except this time it was kindaichi pushing him away, ‘so how much is oikawa paying you to play his girlfriend?’

you couldn’t help but giggle, especially as you could see oikawa from over his shoulder, shooting him the deadliest glare

kunimi poked his head around kindaichi arm to look at you, ‘i’m guessing ¥3000 an hour.’

‘(y/n) is worth way more than ¥3000 an hour!’ oikawa yelled from behind the crowd of boys surrounding you 

yahaba hurried forward, slipped his arm around your waist and escorting you a few paces away from the others to whisper in your ear, ‘does oikawa have any embarrassing childhood pictures?’

you snickered, leaning in and whispering back, ‘yeah, i’ll send them to you on instagram.’

ok. although they weren’t the most charming- they were definitely a fun bunch lol

Kōtarō Bokuto

a secret relationship w/ bokuto has hardly a secret lol

plus, the ‘secret’ part is only gonna last MAX a month ✋

he tries to ‘act natural’ around his teammates but it’s a bit- too natural 

he’ll come back from a make-out session with you, lipstick smeared across his face and just be like ‘hey y’all! ✌ good vibes today’

or when he’d take off his shirt to reveal the scratch marks on his back, that he wasn’t even aware of 

or the hickeys that he wouldn’t even bother try to hide 

so the whole team were aware that bokuto had a partner- they just weren’t sure who it was

but they didn’t really mention anything to bokuto bc they srsly didn’t care which left bokuto under the impression that he was sneaky as hell

akaashi was kinda upset that bokuto didn’t tell him about you tho but he kept that to himself

everyone was silently curious as to who bokuto was dating but none of them actually spoke up about it

until one day, konoha was chatting to komi, thinking they weren’t being listened to since bokuto seemed preoccupied with practising spikes, ‘psst, komi. i saw bokuto walk home with (y/n) the other day, i think she might be the one he’s da--’

but bokuto develops super-hearing when you’re involved

he was now looming over komi and konoha in what felt like a blink of an eye, ‘what did you say about (y/n)?’ he asked in a rather gruff voice

both boys were taken back by their captain’s sudden change in mood but komi managaed to stutter out, ‘oh- konoha just saw you walking home with her the other day; you both make a very cute couple.’

all sense of menace or threat was washed out of bokuto’s tone as his lips formed a bright smile, ‘awww, thanks! we do-- wait!’ 

bokuto cut himself off and the boys started snickering, ‘so it’s (y/n) that you’re dating.’ komi stated the obvious, this time loud enough for the whole gym to hear.

bokuto couldn’t help but face-palm, his sweaty hands making a loud, wet slapping noise against his skin. ‘ugh! i wasn’t supposed to tell you that.’ he grumbled, eyeing everyone in the gym that was sending him astonished looks

after a while of sulking in his emo-mode..with help from akaashi, bokuto finally tried to see the positives in the situation

‘well, maybe today she can finally meet you all.’ bokuto murmured, eyes full of hope which could hardly be seen passed the strands of his deflated hair that hung in front of his face

‘sure.’ akaashi shrugged, seeing nothing wrong with this idea 

there was a lot of things wrong, though

firstly, you were at your own club which finished ten minutes after practise ended, which means bokuto had to use his puppy-eyes on everyone on the team to convince them into staying for ten minutes extra

secondly, bokuto was so hyped that you were finally meeting his teammates, an introduction for each person took like 5 minutes 

bokuto inhaled sharply to catch his breath from the last introduction he just did, ‘ok next, this is washio, he’s one of our middle blockers bc he is so damn tall - say hi, washio. his eyebrows might make you think that he is a meanie or something  — that’s what i thought at first — but he’s really not. he offered me some of his lunch after i forgot to bring money that day so he’s definitely a good egg. he’s also a really good blocker and he has similar hair to me so i think that’s why he’s so good. also, he’s really good at making tea.’

ok now imagine that but for every. single. member.

he also gives you an extra ass intro too lol

‘(y/n), this is onaga. onaga this is my beautiful, stunning, flawless girlfriend (y/n)  — she’s the sweetest person ever and she give the sweetest kisses on the face of this earth.’

please don’t be embarrassed he just loves you so much 

[kira-fluff]

Hi there! And congrats for your graduation! I am really happy for you and I hope lots of beautiful things await you in the future. I am that anon who wrote you about a month ago, by the way... I am very sorry, I really didn't want to make you wait, it's just been a bit of a rough period and I've been feeling a little down, but now I am better :) May I ask for some platonic Jumin/MC headcanons in which they are best friends? I love him, just not in a romantic way. Thank you so, so much again. <3

a/n: you are such a sweetheart :') anything for you <3 i just moved so that's why i've been seemingly MIA. thank you for the well wishes. i wish you all good things as well. p.s. - i'm back babes <3 i'm going on an all-family-required trip in a week or so but I plan to write during the long trip that i'm already mentally preparing for. may or may not be uploading from hotels lol. // kira-chan

Platonic!Jumin x MC Headcanons

alright so let me just begin by saying you two would be absolutely adorable

i can just imagine your dorky little snorts at jumin's sarcastic expressions

you know the thing when someone does something really stupid and he's just like " - _ - "

i firmly believe the friendship between you two would strive for both of you to be better people

like, i think your influence on jumin would make him realize he really needs to recognize his worker's needs and accommodate for them both professionally and morally.

jaehee says thank you <3

as well as yourself

jumin is definitely the friend who teaches you to savor the good moments

like this man is a GOD at stress management

when you find yourself starting to get worked up, he would be there in an instant

"MC, it'll be alright. Let yourself feel what you need to feel right now, but know those feelings cannot control you."

who says jumin isn't a cuddler.

like ok maybe he doesn't look like a stuffed, fluffy bear but lemme tell you

MOVIE NIGHTS TOGETHER..??? Y E S

but he'd also sorta ruin movie nights with his obsession with logical reasoning lmao

"there is absolutely no way that bus would roll off a small vehicle without crushing it."

"jumin it's Fast and Furious let it go."

*pauses the movie again to complain about the amount of 'oil' on The Rock's body*

don't hate me i'm trying to think of the worst movie that you could possibly choose to watch with him

i can't even fathom jumin's reactions to Guy Fieri PFFT WELCOME TO FLAVOR TOWN

you tease him for his bs attempts to sherlock movies

sitting together watching a movie with a blanket draped around both of you

and he's so tall that he'd be such a blanket-hogger too

jumin is the mom friend through and through

you've entrusted him with your like 9 spare keys because you keep losing them

and then losing your spare key

and then one time you lost your spare spare key

so yeah he keeps one on him at all times

that one time you got totally wasted, it was jumin who received your texts riddled with errors

and of course he was the one that insisted on driving you home that night, not trusting you'd make it to your front door even if you took a cab

and let's face it, you probably wouldn't have.

he also takes blurry yet still completely embarrassing photos of you

"what i thought that one of you looked good"

"DELETE IT NOW, JUMIN."

how is it that someone can be so smart and stupid at the same time?

i say he's the mom friend yet he is also a designated airhead when it comes to anything digital

so basically the ultimate mom friend because like have you ever a mom who actually knows how to work technology

the type to get mad if you don't know where you wanna go eat but it's because he doesn't like fast food lol

if you call him something sappy like "bestie" he will saying to the effect of "that's cringe" but secretly he's like "awe bestie"

will remember the little things istg

like your favorite movie is the unappreciated "Atlantis"?

he is extra as hell so bday prezzie would be a casual trip to disney

bc come on that's not even pocket change for him

but mostly he wants you to think he's the best friend you've ever had

i'm imagining you've been friends since high school (assuming he didn't grow up on private tutors)

back then, i imagine he was very anti-social

even V couldn't bring him out of his shell at school

it was your brightness that thawed his seemingly cool exterior

he'd listen to you as you rambled on and on about this book you'd been reading

or perhaps he'd chat himself about some of his random cat photos he'd gotten from V

sometimes you'd take pictures of cats while walking to school to show to him later

like it was the highlight of his week

you became friends mostly (besides the fact that jumin just likes your company) because he never forced him to do anything he didn't want to do

it was so important to him to make his own choices because he lost that ability so many times in his life.

jumin didn't have a say when his father and mother divorced

from seven years old til then, he never felt like he truly had a voice

so when you'd listen to him even if someone else interrupted him..it meant something to him

he wasn't shy, per-say, just reserved.. distant.

when jumin decides someone is his friend, it's very hard for him to ever let go -- he's fiercely loyal.

above all, he's grateful to you for staying by his side and continuing to care for him even now. <3

[myherowritings]

valentine’s day with bnha

a/n: this is my valentine’s gift to you because i love you lots and hope u get to eat lots of chocolates n.n sorry i didn’t have time to finish a full fic like i planned :( this week is my exam week and i had no time :( but i hope u still enjoy these lil hc’s!! ily and if ur sad u don’t have a valentine don’t be bc i’m ur valentine now ^-^ (+ the bnha boys pfft) 

pairings: bakugou x reader, todoroki x reader, shinsou x reader 

(let’s be real i was thinking of nn!bakugou and ysag!shinsou for their headcanons so u can view it that way too heh) 

BAKUGOU KATSUKI

He scoffs at thought of Valentine’s Day

Bakugou views it as a commercialized holiday that suckers foolish losers into wasting money in the name of “love” 

Goes on and on about how corporations don’t care about anyone's feelings or the sentiment of love, they just want to profit by any means necessary

He much prefers showing you he loves you in subtle ways throughout the year (or big, in-your-face ways to show off to everyone else that you’re dating him) and for the most part you agree with him

But that doesn’t stop you from wanting to shower him with gifts and affection (partly because you know he’ll “hate” it, partly because you want to see his flustered blush when he receives the presents) 

You buy flowers and chocolates and give it to him in a cheesy way in front of his friends so they can tease him about it

Bakugou pretends to hate it but is actually smug that everyone got to see his adoring significant other

“Yeah, be jealous you nerds”

But when you’re in a more private place, you give him his real presents 

You make his favorite foods (with his preferred level of spice that no other human can handle) and play some cheesy slow dancing music as you share a meal

You decorated the dining area so lavishly with candles and fairy lights and champagne that Katsuki can’t help but feel flattered at the effort 

“You really upped your game this Valentine’s Day, huh?” he teases with a light scoff. “But still can’t beat what I have in store for you next month.” 

TODOROKI SHOUTO

Shouto comes home with armfuls of chocolates for the multitude of women who think he’s handsome and have taken an interest in him

You’re alarmed when you see how much chocolate he has and can’t help but laugh as he frets over how he’s going to remember to give them all courtesy gifts on White Day

You’re a little jealous because of how much others like him, but you’re not worried because you know he’s loyal and he always reassures you that you’re the one he loves

Todoroki loves spoiling you and showering you in gifts, but on Valentine’s Day you tell him he’s not allowed to give you anything

The day is all about spoiling him

He doesn’t care much for material things and would rather much have you give him cuddles or something homemade

Preferably cuddles

(Honestly, just cuddle him all day and he is all set)

Shouto doesn’t understand why Valentine’s Day is about romantic love when its origins are of someone who was executed

He rambles on and wonders what type of day he would inspire 

“You’d inspire a day of thoughtfulness and trust and loyalty because that’s what you exhibit,” you say 

Todoroki gives you an embarrassed, yet happy smile at your compliment 

Along with cuddles, you (attempt to) make him a home-cooked chocolate cake that may or may not turn out as planned

Regardless, he adores it anyway 

You make him a small, heart-shaped book filled with the little things you’ve noticed about him and reasons why you love him which he keeps by his bed every night 

You two love each other and need more than a day to share all that love 

SHINSOU HITOSHI

Shinsou was the type of person who rolled his eyes at Valentine’s Day and gagged at all the couples holding hands and being lovey-dovey… Until he became one half of a couple that held hands on Valentine’s Day and acted all lovey-dovey 

“You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become a villain,” he says as you bow your head solemnly

He hates that he enjoys the cheesy gifts of chocolates and stuffed animals and surprise hugs and kisses you give him during the day

He doesn’t want to like it, but he does

He blames you 

Hitoshi wouldn’t have been this way if he were with anyone else and he is sure of it, but it just has to be you

(Not that he’s actually complaining)

Growing up, people thought he was attractive, but since they were always too scared and intimidated to approach him, he never got many Valentine’s gifts-- Only some courtesy chocolate that was passed out to everyone 

When you find out that he didn’t get many gifts before, you decide you have to make all those years up to him 

How you make up for those lost years? By making him one giant, dense chocolate that should last him a good six months if he ate a piece everyday of course

Shinsou isn’t sure what he’s going to do with all that candy or if he stands a chance of ever finishing it all, but he tries for you 

The effort you put into making it and the reason for it is what really matters to him 

It doesn’t matter if he wasn’t able to celebrate Valentine’s Day in the past, because now he’ll have many more to look forward to with you

[shoichee]

Hey! I read your Kise imagine recently and I adore it, it's rare to see someone write about manga!kise and I really loved it. Furthermore your writing is so so good to read 🥰 I wanted to ask you Kise x reader prompt 1! I would really like to read about him in such a situation ☺ Thank you Iain advance 😘

WAHHH TYSM ANON <33 IM SO HAPPY HEHE, and phew yall thought asshole kise was something but... have yall heard of TEIKO-era asshole kise??! NO?? dw, bc he’s debuting here // i wanted to really showcase his dual sides through more of dialogue (so we won’t really see what’s in Kise’s mind for this), so here it is hope you enjoy this anon! 

Kise x Reader

Prompt: “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.”

Word Count: 2120

prompt list here

»»—————　☼　—————««

“We’re not just friends and you fucking know it, Kise.”

“Huh?” he mocks with a condescending tone. “I didn’t peg you as someone who’d pull shit out of their ass like my last ‘ex-girlfriend.’ Just because I let you hang around me doesn’t mean you can parade around campus with an inflated ego.”

Your hands shake furiously at your sides, trying not to punch the basketball player square in the face.

“Me? With an ego? Look who’s damn talking!” you seethe. “I’m tired of the fact that we keep playing this stupid flirting game for months, only for it to go absolutely nowhere!”

“Have you ever stopped to use your brain and think about how flirting inherently is done in good casual fun?” Kise explains slowly, implying that you were the immature one in the situation. “Meanwhile, you have the audacity to get mad at me when you’re the one who’s using me for your own selfish gain!” Kise sends a heated glare but his eyes were tinged with betrayal.

“What the hell are you even talking about? Are you out of your mind?”

“Fuck this,” he scoffs, throwing his hands up in mock surrender. “I’m leaving, I’m not dealing with this shit anymore. If you want attention, I’m not gonna entertain you anymore.”

“No, you will not leave!” you yell, trying to stop Kise in his tracks. He merely ignores you as he holds up a hand to do a wave with his back to you. “You’re going to explain what the hell you were talking about!”

You sprinted and held onto his sleeve to tug him back to face you, only to be met by the most bone-chilling gaze from him. You would’ve absolutely cowered in his presence if it wasn’t for the fact that you were irrationally angry from the false accusations Kise threw at you prior. You can definitely tell that Kise was biting his inner cheek to keep himself reasonably calm.

“Ryōta,” you say.

“Don’t call me by my first name anymore,” he says flatly.

“Where did you get the idea that I was using you?”

“Hah! Why? Does it matter? Are you gonna go to them and try to threaten them after? It’s so clear from the way you’re talking right now that you only see me as a prize to show off.” You inhale a huge breath to stop yourself from saying something you’ll regret.

“I never saw you as some object, Ryōta,” you mildly scoff. “Let me make myself clear. All I wanted was a clear answer from you every time I asked you if you wanted something serious, but every single damn time, you changed the subject or never answered the question!”

“It’s all done in good fun. Does it really need to be serious?”

“But I want something serious with you!”

Kise merely turns away in silence, but you can see his body slightly tremble.

“... Ryōta?”

“Don’t lie to me like that…” he says, slightly sucking a breath. “... Look, if you really wanna use me to boost your popularity, just… just come clean, okay? I’ll go along with it if you tell me now. After all, we’ve been… good friends.”

“Lie? Why would I lie? I never thought once of using you or having any motives other than to get to know you personally as a friend, Ryōta,” you say, looking down on the grip you had on his sleeve still.

“What reason is there to know someone like this other than to activate a ticking time bomb while playing a game to pass that time? Isn’t that how it’s always been? Isn’t that what we are right now?”

Your senses tell you that something deeper beyond this surface argument has been troubling him. You slowly let go of his sleeve, before turning away with a sigh, leaving Kise absolutely confused.

“I think we both need to cool our heads,” you sigh. “We’ve both said too much, and… just… forget what I said, okay? And I’ll forget about what you told me.” Kise’s eyes widen at your statement.

“(y/n)-cchi…?”

“We can still do light-hearted banter like we always do the next time we see each other, okay Kise?” Your fists on your sides tremble before you hold up your head to give him a cheerful smile that’s eerily all too familiar to his own. You turn to walk away, but his heart squeezes painfully at the sight of your back to him like this. You’re so far from him. So far.

“Hold it, now…” he says, slightly sprinting to catch up to you. He grabs your hand, still balled tightly by your side. “You’re cruel, you know that? Demanding me not to leave but then leaving the conversation on your own accord? You’re a hypocrite.” He spins you around to see your eyes barely struggling to hold back fresh tears. Little did he know that your countenance was a mirror to his own.

“... Our heads aren’t in the right place, Kise. You should probably let go.”

“I probably should, huh…” he says, but still giving no sign that he was actually going through with it.

“Knowing you, you’d really hold my fist until someone has to actually separate you from me.”

“And knowing you, you’d probably punch me before anyone else had the chance to do so.”

“You know me so well, hm?” you muse, a tiny curl of your lip a different world than the one you gave moments before.

“... No,” he says with a slight frown. “I don’t think I know you well enough.”

“I don’t know you enough either, Kise.”

Silence falls between the two of you, frail as thin ice, before you eventually break it.

“... You’re right, this whole friendship we have right now… it’s a time bomb. It’s bound to fail and fall apart.”

“W-Wait,” Kise slightly says in shock. “That was… I didn’t mean it like—”

“No healthy relationship of any kind would last if we keep dancing around each other like this. I wanna be honest with you for once… I… don’t wanna do this banter anymore. I don’t wanna do these flirting games. I’m kinda tired of it. Especially when you always keep me at a distance.”

“Pfft, (y/n)-cchi,” he snorts loudly, flashing his sunny smile. “I’m practically so close to you holding your hand!”

“You know exactly what I mean,” you sigh, and you avert your gaze away. “You feel so far. I just… you feel so out of reach even when I’m in the same room as you… even as of now. I just want to know where we’ll end up.”

You firmly shake his grip off you, watching his hand falling back to his side as he does nothing but stare at you. You don’t know if he’s angry, offended, or shocked, but whatever his expression was, you couldn’t tell, not when you still stared at the concrete to the side rather than at him.

“Of course I wanna be friends with you,” you continue. “But can you blame me for believing that there’s something more between us when we do romantic gestures and flirting for months on end? If we’re just going to be friends, that’s fine, but I’d prefer if you’d also stop addressing me with -cchi, just to draw a clear boundary between us.” You finally look up to see Kise, but to your own shock, he looks quite bitter.

“You say that you’re confused about what we are, but then you go prattle to everyone else that you’re my significant other when we haven’t even talked a single thing about being a serious thing. You’re so fucking confusing.”

“I… did no such thing?” Your eyes, still puffy from the tear ducts, shine in genuine bewilderment.

“You… didn’t?”

“Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me right now?”

“I… um… oh…” All he could do was to stand there completely stupefied, mouth gaping as multiple realizations suddenly hit him like bricks. He rubs his neck as he shamefully looks away.

“So tell me,” you slowly say, giving him a more bone-chilling gaze than the one he gave you. “What exactly have you been hearing in the hallways?” You both stand there in silence again as Kise struggles to think of a way to explain it without sounding completely dumb.

“Okay, look… I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have listened to the rumors so easily, especially since I despise them too, but… they were about you, and I just couldn’t help myself…” he mumbles. “I don’t know, I… the thought of you getting close to me to use me really, really hurts.”

“And you thought just cutting me off on the spot was the most reasonable decision you can think of?”

“H-Hey…! Don’t put it like that! I thought I knew you well, but when I heard what people gossiped, my mind just went somewhere, and I thought maybe I misread you at some point. If you really did have ulterior motives, cutting you off wouldn’t be as easy as that other girl. Because I… w-wait! Where are you going?!”

“Home, Kise,” you flatly say. “It’s after school after all.”

“At least hear what I have to say!” He tries to catch up with you, but you only speed walk to outpace him. “Let me explain myself!”

“Hypocrite~” you say, using Kise’s mocking voice. “I don’t recall you letting me explain myself in the beginning.”

“(y/n)-cchi, I’m sorry! I’ll pay for all the outings we’ll do this week! And um… I’ll always talk to you if something’s bothering me—don’t ignore me!”

“Didn’t I tell you not to use -cchi?” you sigh, stopping abruptly, causing Kise to accidentally bump against you. “I’ll forgive you, but we’re still only friends. I guess I’ll apologize for assuming things on my end, too.” Kise drops his head on your shoulder from behind, and you only roll your eyes in amusement at the familiar contact. “Oh dear, Kise. I didn’t think you were the type to be so clingy after a fight.”

“Okay, I’ll ‘fess up,” he says, voice muffled by your uniform blazer. “Even though we’ve always gotten along so well, there’s always been a part of me who’s been on the lookout for any possible signs that you only saw me for my reputation. While I enjoyed having you around, I had always been ready to cut you off if I saw anything suspicious, but… lately the thought of letting you go ached so much… and then I heard what the other students were talking about… how you were acting the entire time… how you somehow screwed over other people before… couldn’t really think properly after that.”

“Boo hoo,” you huff. “Do you want a kiss to make you feel better?”

“... I actually do.”

“I think our heads haven’t completely cooled down. I’m going ahead.” You were about to walk away, even though you very much enjoyed his head on your shoulder, but his arms wrap around you to stop moving any further from his side.

“You said that you wrongly assumed what we were…” he whispers. “But you’re actually right. We’ve been more than friends for a while without me really acknowledging it,” he chuckles at your groan, “I guess you really do know me well… I’m really attached to you… but it’s not fair that you’re so collected even when I’m hugging you like this.”

“Kise, you’re an idiot, do you know that?” you snort. “How are you hugging me but not noticing how fast my heart is beating?”

“H-Hey! Can you call me by my first name again? I said it without really thinking, okay? It hurts me every time you do that.” He gives the most comical pout, but you only punch the top of his head on your shoulder before walking ahead.

“I’m still mad at you. I’m going home.”

“(y/n)-cchi, w-wait! Let me walk you home, then!”

“Don’t call me that either. I’m still mad at you.”

“But aren’t we dating now? I can call you that if we’re a thing.”

“But I’m still mad. You still said all those horrible things, and that stung. You think you’re the only one hurting right now?”

“I’m really, really sorry! I’ll make it up to you, and I won’t say anything like that again, and…”

“You’re not being really convincing.”

“I know I was being immature and the one with the inflated ego, and I said things that aren’t remotely true—”

You sigh before you turn back to a panicking Kise behind you.

“Then you better make it up to me by cuddling me and telling me some sweet nothings, because I can really use that right now, Ryōta.”

[killerhatcanons]

Could u do a childhood friends hc with Trapper, The Shape and Ghostface?? 🥺🥺

Of course my friend! uwu

So we can imagine most of Michael‘s and Trapper‘s childhoods but I don’t think Danny has much of a background lore going as far soo I‘d personally also put him into a difficult household (even though I wish it were different) I also think I’ll put this one into a text form

TW: idek what to tag this with but I’m guessing abuse/domestic violence

The Trapper (Evan MacMillan)

Evan had always in a way idolized his father and his father had never deemed anyone worthy to get close to his son. Needless to say Evan didn’t have many friends at all when he was young. The other children were scared of his father and the stories their parents had told them about the MacMillan family. They were gruesome, as much as a parent would allow their child to hear but enough to ensure they would never want to get close to the MacMillan child.

You had always thought it was unfair. It wasn’t Evan’s fault that his dad was mean and you didn’t want him to sit alone over something he wasn’t responsible for. So you approached him and you kept approaching him even as he tried to push you away. He knew about the stories and he himself knew very well that his father wasn’t the kindest person. Time and time again had his father hit him for not following his orders, had thrown away his sketches and sent him to bed on an empty stomach as a punishment. He understood why others feared his father and he didn’t blame them. Even though he loved his father, he also despised him. He knew no one but him would endure his father’s punishments so when the tiny you approached him he tried his best to push you away. You were far too fragile, you couldn’t get close to him or his father. 

But you didn’t care. No matter how many times he rudely sent you away you always returned. And as time passed he felt himself slowly growing fond of you. You were nice to him, the only person that made him feel warm and he didn’t want you to leave him anymore. He wanted to keep your kindness, to keep the warmth you made him feel through the utter coldness he was accustomed to. So he allowed you to stay if only for a while which soon became longer and longer.

You played together in elementary school and he would protect you from anyone that even attempted to bully you. Or ask you out for that matter. He soon had to realize that he grew more and more possessive of you, that he didn’t want anyone to take you away from him. You had been with him since the beginning, had shown him kindness and understanding, had been there for him and took care of the bruises his father kept giving him. As cheesy as this sounded you had been his sun all along, naturally and selflessly giving him warmth without ever being asked to. His one and only friend.

Shit I might need to turn this into a fiction maybe? haha we’ll see

The Shape (Michael Meyers)

Michael had always been the silent child in your kindergarten group. First everyone thought he was just a little shy but you soon realized that he simply refused to speak. Of course your teacher tried to convince him to talk, even had a meeting with his parents but they assured that he learned speaking, however at one point simply stopped any form of communication. To the adults he was a hopeless case. They tried desparately to change him, but he wouldn’t budge. 

To you he was a welcome friend. You didn’t mind his silence, you knew he was listening to you and you could still play together. Well, it was mostly you telling him what to do with the toys, because he himself wouldn’t do anything besides holding them in his hand, but that wasn’t much of an issue to you. 

Of course you tried to get him to play with your other friends too, but his lack of enthusiasm often got in the way and the other kids got scared of his silent and emotionless behavior. However, even when they told you to, you refused to stop playing with Michael. Yes, he was a little odd, but that didn’t make him a bad child (killing his sister later lowkey did tho oop) so you didn’t want him to be alone. Everyone needs some company, right? 

Over time you noticed, that he would remember what you had told him to do with the toys, instead of simply holding them, to which you would give him a big smile.

This improvement you saw in his behavior made you even sadder when one day he stopped coming to the kindergarten. At first you had thought he was sick, but weeks went on without a single trace of him or his parents.

Upon asking you own they had told you he was sent to another kindergarten instead, that was specialized on children like him. You were sad of course, but you accepted it, hoping he would find more friends to play with now. 

You only later found out he was sent to an asylum instead of another kindergarten.

The Ghostface (Danny Johnson)

Danny Johnson did not have the nicest childhood imaginable. After her divorce his mother didn’t become directly abusive to him, more so the alcohol. 

He liked to think that the slurring woman bruising him wasn’t his mother, that it was simply someone else, someone more aggressive trying to be her. He didn’t want to think his mother hated him, he didn’t want to believe she would bruise him, would shout at him and blame him for what had happened to her marriage. 

Even as a young boy he knew to cover his bruises. He loved his mother, he didn’t want her to be alone even though the woman the alcohol brought out of her hurt him in every way possible. But it was his fault right? His dad didn’t want him so he left him and his mother. He was responsible and the least he thought he could do was let her let out her pain on the person responsible for her misery.

In school he didn’t talk much to anyone. He was a rather shy kid, not wanting to cause anymore trouble for anyone. At lunch he sat alone, but he didn’t mind. He also didn’t mind being called weird or gross for his greasy long hair or the bags under his eyes. Not that he wanted to talk to anyone about himself anyways. Not even to you as you approached him. 

You had watched him sit alone for a long time. He looked sad, restless, sometimes even scared and despite not even knowing him, it hurt you to see anyone in this state. So you went to talk to him. However, it took a while for him to stop avoiding you as best as he could and he eventually opened up to you a bit. He still didn’t tell you about the abuse until you reached middle school, but when he did you were determined to help him, to clear his understanding of him not being responsible for anything and to get him a new home. 

With the help of your parents you were able to get him out of his household and soon find a acquainted family that was willing to take him in. The Olsens tried their best to provide him with everything he needed. And while you knew it would take time for him to heal, you were relieved he was part of a loving family now, that would help him back onto a safe track. 

You couldn’t have known that the damage to Danny’s brain had already been done and there was no way of saving him from the twisted prison of his own mind.

OOK THESE ARE WAY DARKER THAN YOU PROBABLY WANTED BUT I OOP GOT CARRIED AWAY 

I can attempt to make it more wholesome a second time if you want these were just the most logical things that came to my mind haha... honestly idk but I usually think that someone isn’t just yk born a killer (except Michael maybe pfft) so I came up with some uhm logical upbringings to the boys haha yeet..

Anyways I’m considering turning the Evan and Ghosty one into their own separate story thingsies. Kinda hard to do something with Michael bc uhm Psychiatry but possibly something with a reader that’s also in treatment or we pull a Harley Quinn sometime who knows! 

For now I hope you aren’t too mad that this was so... dark instead of cute oop >:)) if you’re mad just let me die on the hook next time pffft

[dammitlogan]

omg can i request like a part 2 to the akaashi imagine 🥺🥺🥺🥺 bc it was so cute 🥺💘

Wingwoman | Akaashi Keiji 

wc: 1.2k

a/n: hehe this one is for you anon! This is a continuation of Troublesome, so go check it out if you haven’t already! Thanks for requesting, anon. I’m glad you liked it <333 Enjoy!

“Okay, (Y/N), you can do this,” you murmur to yourself as you stare at the looming gym doors. You can hear balls thumping on the floor and vague meandering conversations. Despite being asked to come, you felt as if you were intruding on a sacred place. For the second time, you stop yourself from opening the gym doors. Just as you’re about to give up and go home, Kaori opens the door.

“(Y/N)! Good to see you! What are you doing here?” Your face flushes in embarrassment. You felt like you were caught red handed despite not doing anything other than aimlessly loitering outside the gym. No going back now, you suppose.

“Ah, I just came to watch the team practice.” You notice her face shift into one of confusion. “...If... that's okay?” Do people usually just come and watch teams practice? Was this a weird thing to do? However, before you can tell her never mind and sprint home, Kaori gives you a knowing smile.

“Of course it’s okay! C’mon!” she grabs you and drags you into the gym happily. “Guyssss! (Y/N)’s here!” she sings. Your face flushes as the entire team turns to face you. Maybe it wasn’t too late to go home now. Bokuto pales, swiveling quickly in your direction.

“(Y/N),” he whines, drawing out each syllable in your name. “We didn’t have tutoring today, did we? Please don’t make me leave,” he wails. He wilts dramatically and practically drags his limp body towards you. You stifle a laugh but can't help rolling your eyes at his display.

“No, Bokuto. I just came to watch you guys practice.” In no time, Bokuto is back to himself. He springs up in a wave of happiness, launching you up and spinning you around. He rambles about how he totally forgot that Akaashi invited you after your last tutoring session.

“Yay! (Y/N) came to see us play, guys!” 

“Bokuto, I don’t think (Y/N) enjoys that,” a familiar, monotonous voice analyzes. Suddenly, the gym stops spinning at an alarming rate. You blink, trying to stop the gym from dancing around.

“Oh. Sorry!” Bokuto gently sets you back on the ground as he laughs heartily. “I just got excited!” You can’t help the weary smile that crawls onto your face as he happily bounces back to practice. 

Suddenly, a hand is gently placed on the small of your back. “Are you alright, (Y/N)?” 

Pink dusts your cheeks as you stare up at the angel leaning over you. His expression remains stoic, but his gray blue eyes show kind concern. With just a simple hand gracing your back, you feel as if you were bathing in the warm glow of the sun. You struggle to form any reassurances over the butterflies in your stomach. The only thing you were able to focus on the feeling of him being so close. Akaashi smiles softly once you properly assure him you’re fine through a painful moment of stuttering. He jogs back over to Bokuto as the spiker whines at his absence from practice.

You fight the urge to beat yourself in front of everyone because of your own awkwardness. “Sooo, Akaashi, huh?” You yelp at the sudden whisper in your ear. You glare at Yukie over your shoulder as she grins smugly. You spot Kaori giggling quietly behind Yukie.

“What? Pfft. No. No. I barely even know him! I-”

“Shhh.” Yukie places a finger over your mouth with a wink. “I gotchu.”

You stomach drops at her words, eyes widening in fear. “No,” you whisper, “Please don't get me.”

“I’m gonna be the best wingwoman in this gym,” she mutters. “AKAASHI!” You don’t have the time to stop her before Akaashi looks over expectantly. You try to casually play off your desperate flailing when you notice his attention on you and Yukie. “(Y/N) says that toss was great! Keep up the good work!” she chimes. You awkwardly throw a thumbs up in his direction, refusing to look up from the gym floor. You hear snickers come from the court as Yukie elbows you. “Ahaha! He smiled~ Do you know how much of a big deal that is?” she cheers.

“That was so embarrassing. Why would you do that?” you whine quietly, shooting her a dirty look completely undermined by your red face. She only laughs in reply, dragging you over to the bench. Her and Kaori help alleviate your embarrassment by explaining some of the exercises the boys are practicing and the rules of volleyball. Occasionally, they go out of their way to  tease you for staring a beat too long at Akaashi. At the end of practice, you help them pass out water bottles. Kaori takes this chance to shove you in Akaashi’s direction.

Akaashi catches your elbow as you ungracefully stumble towards him. “Ah, sorry!” You laugh awkwardly, offering a water bottle. You’re about to walk away when Kaori shoots you a look. “You... did really well at practice! I don’t know much about volleyball, but your tosses are really clean.” You inwardly cringe at your attempt at small talk, but Akaashi hardly seems to notice. 

“Thanks,” he smiles softly. He’s about to say something else when Bokuto suddenly appears and throws his arm around Akaashi.

“Hey! (Y/N)’s pretty cute, righhhht, Akaashi?” Bokuto wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at the two of you. Both you and Akaashi flush immediately. 

“B-Bokuto-” Akaashi starts as you simply stutter thoughtlessly. 

“Bokuto! That’s not subtle at all!” Yukie complains, roughly dragging the man away. You gawk as they disappear behind the gym doors. Suddenly, you’re extremely aware that you’re alone with this god of a man. You briefly wonder if you should bow when you leave. Akaashi clears his throat, shifting his feet.

“I’m sorry about... him.”

“No, no. It’s fine,” you laugh, waving your hand dismissively. “I tutor him, so I know that he can be... well, a lot.” Akaashi laughs quietly- a sound you realize you could die happily hearing- as he nods in agreement.

“Should we..?” He gestures to the doors and picks up his bag.

“Yeah, yeah! Let’s.” You follow him to the door, but he pauses after opening it.

“You... are, by the way,” he mumbles. You shoot him a weird look, confused by his words until what he said registers completely. Your heart skips a beat at his words. Maybe you should see an ear doctor after this because there is no way you heard him correctly.

“W-what?” 

“I said you are... cute. You are cute, like Bokuto said.” For a moment, you forget how to breathe properly.

“Oh. Uh, thank you,” you murmur lamely. You try to fight a dumb smile from taking over your face. Oh, shit. You haven’t said anything. Do you return the compliment or is that weird? “Oh, and you’re cute too,” you blurt. You hear the same soft laugh from earlier as he turns to look at you. The pink tint on his cheeks is so cute that it nearly brings you to your knees. 

“Thanks. Maybe... we can be cute together sometime.” Wait. Was he..? Be still, your beating heart.

“Maybe Saturday?”

“Saturday. I’ll text you?”

“Please do.” You can hardly talk through your grin. The fiery blush on your cheeks makes you grateful for the cool night breeze.

After you exchange numbers with shaky hands and bated breath, Akaashi leans over and presses a soft, almost unnoticeable kiss to your cheek. “I’ll see you Saturday, then.”

[k-liight]

so I had a really batshit crazy dream

it's been a while since I had a memorable dream but this one was really weird because it was was like a combination between The Wolf Among Us and Spies in Disguise XD" there was a couple fucked-up deaths too and maybe that's because I watched The Devil All the Time last night pfft (which was a great movie by the way, highly recommend if you're not faint of heart) 

so anyway, Bigby was the focus of the dream and for some reason Walter was his sidekick (though he didn't show up much), and everyone in TWAU that had a business office job was now working at an SiD-like agency. parts of the dream were in "game" style and others were in "movie" style, but during some of the "game" scenes I could "play" as other characters besides Bigby, like Snow White or Walter or even myself (which seems pretty obvious, but dreams are rarely obvious lmao). so like in SiD, somebody stole an assassin drone and was using it to cause a lot of damage, and it was more or less up to Bigby to catch the villain. and I, of course, had hidden feelings for Bigby, and I guess in my "character arc", one of my "missions" in the "game" was to eventually confess to him, not too soon bc he was dealing with shit but before somebody tries and succeeds to kill him because you never know lol. I don't remember much of the beginning stuff besides the exposition and bits of a fight scene in the cereal aisle at a Walmart or some shit, but at some point Snow and some guy that looked like Fred from Big Hero 6 were able to find the stolen drone's location-- it was in action and headed right toward the "agency". Snow and the other guy had to go into separate rooms for some reason, but apparently there was a control center in which one could literally self-destruct the drone once found. so Snow hit the self-destruct button, and we saw the drone explode from the cameras, but then we watched in horror as it fucking came back together and carried on like nothing happened. apparently the villain reprogrammed this thing to do that so it was basically indestructible. Snow tried to remotely destroy the drone two more times before the villain's voice boomed from some intercom saying that, specifically because she tried to destroy the drone, he sent it over to where that other guy was and straight-up fucking killed him. yeah. Snow was obviously horrified and I'm over there comforting her and ready to assure her that it wasn't her fault. I guess this guy was aiming to kill everyone at the agency anyway like Killian was, so Bigby was called over to investigate the damage and somehow figured out a plan to lure the villain into a trap. so timeskip to the final battle, everyone else besides me, Bigby, and Walter were evacuated-- for some reason Walter was in a superhero suit-- and while anticipating the villains arrival, he at some point mentioned something about "ordering pizza". at first Bigby was pissed because "you fucking ordered pizza now of all times??!?" but it turned out that was Walter's way of saying the villain was here without actually saying that the villain was here. we look and see a weird painting being drawn on one of the windows, and we somehow fly (??????) out the window, smashing it, to confront the villain. he looked like a weird moving spray-painting of one of the Crash Bandicoot villains (not N. Gin, but the other guy, whatever his name is), and it turned out this sonuvabitch was a shapeshifter who's true form was just a bunch of particles kinda like Sandman of Spider-man's Sinister Six. I specifically remember saying "there's only one way to defeat a shapeshifter: we gotta break their form", which apparently meant making the villain split himself off into different sections and isolating them. I don't remember exactly how we did it, but I think we somehow managed to trap pieces of the villain into glass compartments and we kept him split apart until it killed him. yay, the villain has been defeated! XD timeskip to about a day later, the stolen drone had been brought back to the agency's possession and locked away forever, and I remember thinking, "oh shit, did anyone permanently deactivate it??" so I go toward the hidden storage room where it was locked away for safekeeping so no one else could get their hands on it, and right as I'm about to go in, out comes Bigby who was way ahead of me. so, since he thankfully never fucking died, I used this opportunity to confess, and I don't remember exactly how I said it but I do remember snuggling up to his chest and his arms kinda hugging me...

and then

we

KISSED

!!!

and we all lived happily ever XD" except I absolutely would have also confessed to Walter and made a happy little polyship if my brain would have let me-- why you do dis to me brain!! >:( oh well, at least I got to dream about kissing Bigby X//3

[ajokeformur-ray]

I got somethin: write headcannons about Erileck. Your own, personal view. Gotta give my favorite ship some love, and also more ideas when I write you stuff 😈💜

OMFGGGGG omgomgomgomg skskksskk I’ve been stockpiling this for a few days bc I gotta think even though it’s my relationship sksksk but I hope this hits your OTP spots + helps as a future ref.

This is written in 1st person bc it’s Joker + I. I hope that doesn’t bother anyone skkssk this is gonna be so much fun I’m hyped!!! There’s no organisation to this lmao so there are jumps all over the place pfft.

Warnings for mentions of trauma, anxiety, depression, also smoking, swearing. Also NSFW bc duh xp 

Word count: 3, 207 (woops?)

Questions or comments on my relationship with Joker are welcomed!! I’m sure there are things I haven’t even considered skskks and ngl I do love talking about our relationship pfft.

Joker and I… sksksk I’d be lucky.

Someone like him loving someone like me??? Ridiculous. A dream.

Someone like me loving someone like him??? Don’t be silly.

… And that’s precisely why we work so well together.

We choose to love each other each and every single day. Again and again, no matter what, we find the time to come back together at the end of a long, exhausting day.

I was with Arthur from the very beginning of the film.

I bumped into Carnival outside Kenny’s Music, and I stood to the side to watch him spin that everything must go! sign. 

I’m scared of clowns but something about this clown captured and maintained my interest and so it was that once this particular rendition of Temptation Rag was over, I approached Carnival and sincerely thanked and complimented him on his performance. 

Both of us blushing, both of us unsure, but neither of us can resist the almost magnetic pull which the other gives off. So I invited him to coffee and dinner (and I paid for everything, of course) and neither of us ever looked back.

I fell in love with Arthur before I even knew his name, and when I love it’s… intense and I fall hard, and I fall fast, and I can never stand back up.

I’ve been told before that I love “too intensely” and it’s “too much” for people (I was told this by my abusers so I suppose they were lying but… it’s a very open, raw wound which I battle daily), but for Arthur the way I love is just right. He needs that clinginess, that reassurance.

I’m already in tears thinking of everything I feel and everything I want to say lmao…

I turned my entire life upside down for him without a single regret, forethought or anything like that, and I never looked back sksksksk.

I stayed with him as Arthur and I did everything I could for him - bought his prescriptions, bought him food, helped him to keep the apartment clean… there were arguments because he thought I was merely looking at him as a charity case, or he was wary in case I was just after something…

But with time, patience and persistence I managed to get Arthur to be at least comfortable around me.

We fell in love together but neither of us said anything. We’re both too shy, too scared of rejection…

I don’t know how we got together, it’s just that one day I stayed overnight at Arthur’s apartment to help him take care of Penny and to take care of him, so exhausted was he…

… And I never left.

I was with him through it all and I made it known only to him that I was proud of him every time he stood up for himself. They all had it coming, anyway (I have a flexible morality lmao).

I love his jokes; he and Bill Hader are my favourite comedians (shush I know Bill wasn’t around in the 80s but work with me) and I adore it when he shares them with me.

The darker the better, imo. My favourites are the ones you laugh at because there’s no other reaction to give.

But I digress.

So. Present day. 

He’s Joker and oh, if I thought I loved Arthur… 

I have a very deep, very raw and passionate love for Joker. He is… he’s my entire world and I love him so much I’m tearing up while I type this. He’s so beautiful it makes me cry daily.

Every time I cry because of how beautiful he is, I go straight to Joker. He deserves to see how loved he is. Sometimes I get upset because I don’t feel satisfied with the level of love I’m showing him; it’s never enough and he deserves more.

This most often happens at night, because I get very Soft™ at night.

As such, Joker and I have a very special nightly routine. 

We spend all day thinking about it but we don’t do this particular thing until nighttime, when we can put our lives away and just soak in each other’s presence.

I cry very easily. Happy, sad, angry, frustrated, upset, elated, joyful, sorrowful… any mood you can think of, I will cry if the emotion reaches a certain intensity.

It’s not unusual for me to come into the living room late at night when I’m in my pyjamas (an oversized t-shirt and a pair of undies - yes, even in winter lmao just pile on the blankets) with tears in my eyes, for whatever reason.

Every time Joker looks up to see this sight, his eyes roam over my body and he smiles, a soft “awwh” leaving his lips as he straightens his legs so I can sit down on his lap.

I sit on his lap and cup his painted face in my hands and I smother him in kisses. I start off slow and then I speed up as the love within my heart grows, and Joker always ends up holding my wrists in his hand and giggling under my touch. 

It usually ends up with one or both of us crying. Joker’s so shocked and so awed that I’m still with him even now, and I just love him so much I can’t do anything else.

Joker’s lap is the best seat and it’s my favourite.

I study there, I sit there, I sleep there. 

Cockwarming is also a common occurrence.

If he’s sat a certain way so I can’t sit on his lap, I’m not afraid to press down on his uppermost knee so he straightens out so I can get comfortable on him.

“Can I have my seat back, please?” or “You stole my seat” are common ways of asking for him to move for me.

He is also my clown blanket skkksksk our favourite sleeping position is for me to lay on my back and for Joker to lay atop me. He becomes everything I can feel and his head rests either on my chest or on my stomach, depending on what he wants. My hands are in his hair… and we sleep.

So, naturally, there are copious opportunities for Joker to love me awake ;) many a morning do I awaken to the sensation of fingers gripping my hips, holding me down while he worships me with his mouth.

We don’t do NSFW things .v. often, we prefer to cuddle and just be close. 

Both of us are virgins and shy ones at that, lmao, so it took awhile for things to even get to that point.

We discovered we just prefer to cuddle over full out sex; less messy, for one.

Full sex is usually for the times when words aren’t enough; after an argument, or when either of us is especially sad or just needs something.

When I want to do this, I usually say, “how about you werewolf and go wild on me now?” and he howls before breaking out in laughter, which I stifle with a kiss…

If Joker wants to, one look from him and I just know. He doesn’t even have to say anything.

My answer is always yes. There’s nothing I won’t do for him and he knows it; it’s okay, though, because he’s the same way for me. We balance each other out really well.

During the rare times I’m awake before Joker is, I’ll kiss him awake; his face, his neck, chest, those adorable soft curves on his stomach… 

Any and every excuse which I can think of do I use to love him. 

It’s a daily goal to love him so hard that he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He deserves nothing less.

I steal his red blazer… often.

If Joker can’t find it, it’s either in the wash or I’m wearing it.

As soon as he takes it off, I’ve got it cradled in my arms, holding it to my face to hide my smile. I wear it when he isn’t, I sleep in it when I miss him (even when he’s right there beside me I still miss him), and I often use it as a pillow.

“Are you sure you don’t love that blazer more than you love me?” // “No.” // Any pout he gives me is kissed away and he giggles against my lips because he got what he was after all along.

We can’t sleep without each other. Joker needs to know that he’s needed, and I need to know that my clown is there for me to keep me safe from the things which my mind tells me are in the dark.

Joker does get annoyed with me sometimes because we both know I’m scared of the dark and I have a vivid imagination, and those two things are difficult to handle on the best of days, but I also love horror films.

Slasher ones are my favourite but I also really enjoy the ones which are dark, gritty, the ones which are based more in the psychological than obvious jumpscares.

I know how Joker can get when I watch them, though, so I tend to watch them when he’s out of the apartment or when there’s nothing else to do.

He never stops me from watching them because I’m a grown ass woman, but he makes his disapproval known by by saying he won’t be comforting me that night when I get too scared to turn the lights off.

In the end, though, there isn’t much he can say because he has unhealthy coping mechanisms just as I do, so he wraps me in his arms and hides my face in his chest or in the crook of his neck. “Close your eyes so you can’t see it’s dark.”

“I love you” is said often between us. 

And never just once: “I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you - “ it can and will be said multiple times.

It makes the other person giggle and get teary eyed. We’re slightly obsessed with each other and we love the way we love each other.

There are other ways we say those three words, spoken too much yet never enough:

“You got what you deserved, Joker” // “I suppose I did.”

I wear my outfit sometimes and go out in it, and on rarer occasions (I have acne so I have to be careful) I even do my face like his.

When I really make to say ‘I love you’, I’ll do both. It never fails to make him cry.

The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra is our song, as is The Carpenters songs Close to You and Yesterday Once More. 

Every time those songs are on, Joker spins me into him and even though I have two left feet, he dances with me.

The slow, eerie dances he does are my favourite and I love watching him. He knows and he loves it. He always throws me a wink and it never fails to make me blush and emit such a high pitched noise that I feel compelled to pull my shirt collar up and over to cover my face entirely.

Joker always coos and plays peekaboo with me when I do this to coax me out of hiding.

Neither of us want children but we have two pure black rescue kitties whom we love dearly!

That’s Life is another favourite. I love that song and it never fails to make me smile, even when I don’t want to. I play it every day and Joker always dances with me. We prefer the instrumental version; it reminds us of the simpler times when he was still the unseen (not by me, by Gotham in general) Arthur Fleck.

Aaa, Fleck…

I proposed to him. Kinda.

Joker wanted marriage from day one but I was unsure; I despise the institution of modern marriage but one day I caught sight of a ring I liked the look of in a magazine and I took it over to Joker.

I didn’t say anything, I just held the magazine out at that page for him to take, barely able to speak was I through the depths of my emotions.

It took him ten minutes to stop laughing before he dipped a hand into his blazer and withdrew a small box. 

Neither of us said yes and neither of us said no. 

We just put the rings on the other and that was that.

The next day, I went and got it registered with a cackling Arthur in tow. 

I can be emotionally distant at times; if I’m feeling too much, I tend to withdraw into myself rather than upset Joker by burdening him with what I’m feeling. 

He hates it when I do that, though a lot of the time I’m not even aware I’m doing it, and it upsets him and then he withdraws from me.

When Joker starts to pull away from my kisses and stops accepting hugs, that’s usually my holy shit what the fuck, Erika? moment and then I do my best to apologise to him.

I’m always forgiven after it’s made clear that I hurt his feelings, and then we don’t let each other go for the rest of the night.

When I need a reminder of why I love Joker or when I just need to see him for all that he is, I watch his segment on the Murrat show (that’s not a typo - I know what I said.) and I’m sobbing in seconds.

*sigh* “Why do you do this to yourself, Erika?”

“I needed to - you were in so much pain and I - “

He pulls me to him and shushes me. I tuck my face into the warm crook of his neck and lavish him with kisses and I just hold him and hug him as hard as I can and I apologise again and again.

Joker doesn’t understand why I watch it sometimes and tbh neither do I but I do and he always comforts me even though I feel like I should be comforting him.

As I said earlier, I’m scared of the dark and I drink as much coffee as Joker smokes (I can easily reach 18 cups a day. Easy.), so night times are... interesting. 

It can take up to an hour for me to sleep. Not really because of the caffeine (I’m used to it by now and I feel calmer with it than I do without it) but because I just can’t get comfortable or because I’m convinced something just moved in the corner of the room.

Even with my nightlights, I’m still scared.

It annoys Joker when he’s really tired or trying to sleep and it’s not unlike Joker to grumble “lay the fuck still” and wrap his arms around me so I feel obligated to stay still for him.

Joker never holds me so tight that I can’t move, though. I have trauma relating to body autonomy so he makes sure that I know I can move if I want to.

I prefer to sleep either on my back so I can have my clown blanket or on my side so I can face Joker. I keep my phone by my bed so when I miss Joker or need to see him at 3 AM I’ve got pics and GIFs right there, scared am I that I’ll wake up and he’s just a dream and I’m alone again, so I appreciate seeing him when I wake up in the mornings.

Sleepy morning sex

He’s also at perfect liberty to start things when I’m still sleeping, too.

I gave him an all time free pass - that is how much I trust him. It was the biggest display of trust I could think of, and I’ve never gone back on it or regretted it.

I really just want Joker to know, to know, that he’s loved and cherished. I do my best to let him know that he can be his entire self with me, that I want him to, and he does the same for me.

Fair’s fair though so I’m at liberty to start things when he’s sleeping, though I rarely do because he sleeps so little as it is because insomnia, nightmares etc.

We steal each other’s clothes a lot of the time. 

I wear really baggy clothes (my shirts can pass as short dresses) so Joker fits into them easily.

Joker’s very needy and physically affectionate and clingy and even on the days when I don’t want to be touched (again, for trauma reasons), I still allow him to do with me as he pleases.

Not because I feel like I have to, but because I trust him and I know I’m safe with him. When I’m with Joker, I’m the safest woman in the world.

We only use each other’s names - Erika and Joker (Arthur for serious situations) - when attention is needed now or when it’s a deep situation which requires total candour.

Otherwise, for me it’s “my girl” (I melt every time), “my Erika”, “my Queen”, and then generics like darling, sweetheart, love, angel.

For Joker, it’s “my Joker” (he melts), “my King”, “my clown” and then generics like darling, angel, love, honey. 

We do anything for each other and we always do small gestures for each other; Joker makes me a cup of coffee and I slip a cigarette between his thin lips before I light it for him. He changes the batteries in my nightlights without saying anything and I hand scrub the blood out of his clothes while it’s still fresh.

Things like that tell us, even without words, that we want it to work.

When he comes home from whatever he does as Joker (I don’t ask and he doesn’t tell), I check him all over. Any bruises, scraps, cuts... 

The ‘rule’ is this:

As long as he comes back home to me without even a paper cut, then he can do what he wants as Joker, the reputation he didn’t want or ask for.

We do everything together and with each other and of course we get space from each other when it’s wanted or needed; a lot of the time we’re in the same room doing our own things. 

We argue, though I’m not sure what about - but we always make it up to one another. We don’t go to bed angry, either, and we both get upset during fights so tears are shed and wiped away, apologies whispered against trembling lips.

It’s not an easy relationship and there are probably things I haven’t even thought about lmao, but we work hard and the amount of love we have for each other is so strong and so deep it’s bigger than both of us. 

We choose to love each other every single day, no matter what, and that’s why we’re still together

Erileck met: 4/10/2019 // married: 26/3/2020. We skipped the engagement. We’re in love and we know it, so why wait?

[realcube]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMJE29FG7/

omg i hope u can open the link and see the tiktok i just wanted to share bc it’s so fucking funny. i could def see bokuto, noya, tanaka, or anyone else u can think of sobbing LOL

IRVEBLVGAETZ wait the video was so precious and funny AAAAA 🥺 thank you so much for sharing, anon 🙏

AND YES thEY would!! so i humbly offer you this 

tw// zombies, crying, swearing. mentions of shooting

Kōtarō Bokuto 

you jokingly asked him if he’d leave if you got turned into a zombie and he said HELL NO 

if you’re a zombie then he’ll become a zombie too periodt

akaashi constantly plays the mom friend like ‘if (y/n) jumped off a cliff, would you do it too?’ an bokuto is like ‘fuck yea i would’

but then he was like (with the puppy eyes btw) ‘if i got turned into a zombie, would you leave me, puppy?’

you shook your head, slowly wrapping your arms around his waist and looking up at him, ‘no, kō. in fact, i would handcuff myself to you so you don’t cause any trouble.’

you expected him to chuckle and maybe give you a lil’ kiss but instead he pushed you back onto the couch, so you were laying down and he was on top of you with his head buried in your chest

‘but what if i try to eat your brain?’ bokuto muttered, the cloth of your shirt muffling his sniffles

you shrugged, your hand making its way up his spine to rub his back soothingly, ‘you do that everyday anyway.’

bokuto let out a deep bawl

‘i was joking!’ you cried, thinking that he was crying bc you said he eats at your brain lol

bokuto shook his head, pulling his face back from your chest to reveal his quivering lips, damp puppy-eyes and shiny nose , ‘you’re so damn sweet, (y/n)!’ he howled then hastily concealed his face with your chest 

you couldn’t help but roll your eyes, ‘wow, kō. are you really crying because i said i’ll stay with you during the zombie apocalypse- you’re my boyfriend, what do you expect?’

bokuto sighed, quickly calming himself until his wails were nothing but sniffs, then he choked out, ‘but if you’d stick with me through the end of the world, you’d stick with me through anything else, right? like..if i broke my dick- or if i couldn’t play volleyball anymore?’

geez.

he read into that a lot more than you thought he would 

‘oh, yeah- i’ll be with you during anything and everything, don’t worry.’

that was enough to make bokuto start crying again, ‘I DON’T DESERVE YOU, (Y/N)!!’

Yū Nishinoya

ok- y’all aren’t dating yet 

but he has a MASSSSSIVE crush on you and he makes it very obvious

he simps for you on the daily but you always brush off his advances as playful banter or his naturally flirtatious manner

but you secretly really want to be with him but you don’t want to get into a relationship with him just for him to lose interest and start simping for someone else bc you saw how quickly he shifted from kiyoko to you and you don’t want to get attached just in case he shifts again

and you are both really good friends so now noya has almost given up on trying to woo you as he’s realised that he might be too far in the friendzone

so you’re just out together at the park as friends and you’re on your phone while noya just stares at the sunset, appreciating your presence 

you see ^that^ tiktok on your fyp but you’re single so you try it out on noya

‘what would you do if i got turned into a zombie?’

noya didn’t even bother to ask about the motives of your question and instead he just replied, ‘i’d find a cure and turn you back into yourself!’ like the little optimist he is

you felt a light blush spread across your cheeks and noya clearly noticed it too bc his lips curled into a bright, smug grin 

so you felt the need to respond rather harshly to make sure he knew that you weren’t falling for him or anything despite the fact, you were falling for him ‘easier said than done, genius. what did you get on your last chemistry test again?-oh and your biology one too?’

nishinoya’s bottom lips jutted out to form a pout, ‘well, in that case, i’d make a cage and trap you inside. then i’d go save the world and shit by killing all the other zombies and once society starts rebuilding itself, i’ll wait until one of the science-y dudes makes a cure then i’d come back to your cage and give it to you.’

honestly, you couldn’t even argue with him 

if anyone was gonna save the world from zombies, it’d be noya 

‘anyway, what would you do if i became a zombie, (y/n)?’ 

you paused for a second, tapping your chin with your index finger while thinking then said, ‘i don’t think i could make a cure so i guess i’d just handcuff myself to you so i don’t lose you then figure something out.’

noya literally passed away - with happiness ofc

he was already smiling but now his smile was 10x brighter

‘(Y/N)! SERIOUSLY?! YOU’D DO THAT FOR ME?! WHY?!’ he basically screamed, surprised that you’d say something so sweet since ngl he was really expecting you to say that you’d drop-kick him into the sun, in that situation 

you nodded, ‘yeah, of course. y’know, i’d hate to lose you, noya - even if you are trying to eat my brain.’

a small gasp escaped your mouth as noya flung both of his arms around you and wailed, ‘I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, (Y/N)!!’

you never really thought that your first time telling nishinoya that you love him would be before y’all were dating bc of a zombie hypothetical but..you did it anyway :)))

oh and needless to say, you went on your first date the following day

Ryūnosuke Tanaka

you sit in his lap and watch tiktoks while he peers over your shoulder so he saw the video too lol

he was like ‘pfft. geez why is that guy crying over something like that? pussy alert.’

but then, knowing that he saw the video, you hummed, ‘same!’ then turned your body to face his and caress his cheek, ‘there’s no way i’d be able to leave you, baby. so your zombie-self can have fun dealing with my ass for the rest of your undead life.’

dude he was in tears-

in his own words, pussy alert 

‘you’d be doing me a favour, babe.’ he said shakily, trying his best to hide the fact he was on the verge of bawling his eyes out 

also, you’re not allowed to leave his lap until the sunrises now

he loves you too much to let you go - even to bathroom or kitchen

you’ll have to pry your hips out of his firm grip so good luck with that 

[phoebehalliwell]

Hi! I’ve recently fallen down the Charmed rabbit hole again and I fount your blog, which is amazing btw !! I LOVE YOUR CHARMED NEXT GEN FIC!!!! I also really enjoyed your thoughts about Phoebe's kid! I wish they would have lived in the actual show. How do you think Phoebe’s child living would have impacted her relationship with Coop? And the whole twice blessed prophecy?

!!!!!!!!!!! thank you!! and i’m so glad you like my fic (which i promise i am still working on)!!

as far as phoebe’s kid + the twice blessed prophecy, i have written on that au here, but i think if the baby really had been born it would not be the twice blessed but i do think they would still probably give that plotline to wyatt just bc. i also think that having a child and being a single mother would really further the need for coop bc dating as a single mom while still having a career is hard enough but dating while you’re a single mom with a full time job and a magical half demon baby who was lowkey the antichrist for the better part of the first trimester is a whole new can of worms. i think she still would have had a relationship with jason dean but i think it would be very short lived as i don’t think that he would be ready to commit to a family. and then by the time we hit season six and piper and leo have broken up and jason has left phoebe and yada yada yada phoebe would really be like huh. love isn’t real. we’re all gonna die alone.

and so she’s sitting at a cafe with paige at the end of love’s a witch and is completely ranting about how love is dead or whatever and paige is just like yeah. uh huh. yep. totally. yeah. yeah. i know what you mean. yeah. uh huh. bc it’s totally Not the time to bring up the fact that she has a date with richard on friday and phoebe’s just going on and on like “okay bc look at olivia! she was doing what she was doing out of love!! and she was killing people!!! just an evil, sad, lovesick, ghost. like me. you know cole was my longest relationship? that was like,,, the most successful relationship i had, and it wasn’t even remotely a success!! he turned me evil, paige. i became evil. because that’s what love does. it bring out the worst in people.” and paige is sitting there like jfc i think i need to bring in a shrink or something when all of a sudden the dude pulls up a chair at their table and is like “hi hate to interrupt but i couldn’t help but overhear and you’re wrong” and phoebe’s like who the hell are you and paige is like yeah fuck off buddy private conversation here and this guy’s like “look. love is the strongest magic we have” and paige is like “ehh i think other, stronger magic” and phoebe’s all like “okay, i don’t know who you are, but you don’t know me and you don’t know what i’ve been through okay so you don’t get to sit down here and try to talk to me about love. bitch.” and this guys just like “actually, i do. my name’s coop. it’s nice to meet you, officially.” and he holds out his hand for a handshake and phoebe’s looking at him like imma judo flip u motherfucker but then something catches her eye and she snatches his hand and flips it over, staring at his cupid ring and she’s like no. she grabs her coffee and storms out leaving coop and a Very Confused paige sitting at the cafe table. she turns around at the exit and gestures to paige like come on let’s go get out of here so paige grabs her croissant and purse awkwardly and leaves and coop’s like “i hope everything goes well with richard!” and paige is like????? so she pulls phoebe aside like Who Was That and phoebe’s like “that was the most annoying, pesky, interfering magical creature there is out there. that was a cupid.”

and later that night phoebe would be tucking her child asleep (who in this story is a little girl named prudence) when she hears “you love her, and it doesn’t seem to bring out the worst in you.” and she whips around to find coop leaning in the doorframe and she’s like “you better leave before i vanquish you” and coop sorta just laughs softly and he’s like “i get it. you’ve been burned before. but actively fighting love? it’s not you, phoebe.” and she’s like “tf do you think you know about me” and coop’s like “i know you believe in love. true love. the kind that takes your breath away, where it's the first thing that you think about when you wake up in the morning. you wanna know how i know that?” and phoebe just glares at him in a very defensive stance like yes i want to know but no i will not play into your stupid little monologue and coop’s like “i read your column. not many people could write like that. you help people find love every day, you help them reach out, take risks, open up their hearts-” “okay you know what i’ve had enough of your little sugar coated soap opera speech. go bug someone else.” and phoebe pushes her way past him and beelines for her bedroom, slamming the door and coop’s like :|

and the next morning phoebe’s eating cereal and by eating a i do mean just pushing wheaties around in a pool of milk while dency and wyatt play in the playpen and piper comes in with a mug of coffee like “good morning how are-” “am i a cold hearted cynic?” “...you doing this fine friday morning??” “i’ve got a cupid on my ass” “i’m going to hope you mean the magical kind and not some bad tattoo situation” “i mean, yesterday i was saying that love brings out the worst in people and now i’ve got this 6′2″ cupid with a square jawline following me around. but like,,, don’t i have the right to say that??? all love has done is hurt me. i’m allowed to bitch a little about it!! like! mind your own business??? goddamn! and you know-” “phoebe i just woke up save the onslaught until after 10am please” and phoebe just sorta pauses and goes back to pushing her cereal around and piper says “and i’m not calling you a cold hearted cynic but... you have changed” and phoebe’s completely ready to rant again like “pfft of course i’ve changed you think you can be married to the source of all-” “zp! not til after 10!” and phoebe slumps back and watches as dency draws a small pattern in frost on the tile floor and you can tell she’s sorta mulling over what coop said blah blah blah this episode is the vortex demon she gets knocked into a world based on her innermost desires and in it she’s happily married and in love in an apartment of her own raising her daughter and writing her column blah blah blah she takes one look at her finger that very much has a wedding band on it and is like “cupid!!!! cupid u fuckin bastard get down here!!! cupid!!!” and no response and she’s scowling like “coop??? coop!!!!!!!!” and he’s no where to be seen and she’s like wait shit i think this is the alternate whirlpool vortex things i gotta find my sister blah blah blah chris knocks paige into phoebe’s world and paige is like “okay what’s the catch” and phoebe’s like “what catch” and paige is like “you know, the catch! what makes this not reality. like in my world, magic was practiced openly, and everyone knew about it. come on, chris said the realities were shaped my like our fantasies or wants... is anything different here??” and phoebe’s like “oh you know uhh not really everything basically the same um but you know i have my own apartment here where i live with dency...” “oh my god wait where is she now who’s taking care of her?” “oh uh well that would be my husband.” “cole’s alive????” “no! not cole! i don’t know who he is actually but he seems nice :)” and there’s a beat where you can tell paige really wants to Get Into What This Means and phoebe really Doesn’t Want To Talk About It but then they both seem to agree that they’re being hunted by a demon so maybe this can take a back seat rn blah blah blah they kill the demon and the end of the episode paige is about to go on her date w richard and her and phoebe have a little heart to heart and paige is like i think you should talk to the cupid bc i think maybe your whole hating love thing might just be a front like i think you’re trying to convince urself of something blah blah blah and phoebe’s just like :/ maybe so.

alright blah blah blah next episode phoebe’s like “coop?” and coop, suddenly appearing behind her is like “yeah?” and phoebe’s like “i give up. so uh work your little cupid magic or whatever and i guess let’s do this thing.” and coop like lights up he’s like so happy and he’s all like “great! let’s get started!” and phoebe’s mentally preparing for a series of really boring dates but then coop surprises her by not doing that??? like he doesn’t set her up with anyone at all bc he’s all like you need time to heal and find urself again???? which honestly phoebe isn’t complaining about and like phoebe will be feeding baby dency in the kitchen and coop will pop in like “what are your thought on taking a pottery class?” and it’s happened before where she’s been so swamped with work that she doesn’t have time to pick up supplies for dency so coop will just go out and like buy diapers?? and gradually phoebe feels herself opening up more and more and one night she’s at p3 and this guy come up to talk to her and she doesn’t just scowl him away and she finds herself having a great conversation and she see coop wink at her from across the bar.

and you know things go well with this guy yada yada yada but one night she goes out on a date and her sisters weren’t able to watch lil dency for her so coop was babysitting and she comes back home to see coop sending out small pink glowing projections from his ring and her baby just laughing uncontrollably trying to catch them and phoebe gets why she has been ready to dive fully in to the guy she’s been going out with. coop says it’s just nerves bc of her past relationships and that it’s completely fine and understandable but phoebe knows better. or at least now she does. she’s in love with coop.

[genderfluidkevinday]

genderfluid kevin day headcanons bc i can do what i want and also i have the perfect url to spread my “please representation” propaganda. 

“how did you know?”

because in the quiet of nights when kevin is supposed to be asleep but he cant, not really, when his heart is still pounding from practice and every breath riko makes him terrified of being caught, he reads what he stole from the public library and it says sometimes people do not fit into the gender they were assigned and

because by sneaking searches on the internet when he can, kevin finds words. dangerous, un-raven-like words for how to love someone and how to be yourself. he finds words that mean you are not alone. 

because he wakes up one day and demands to be the queen of exy, to be seen as what he is. the best. more powerful than the king. (not entirely cisgender?)

because it feels right. 

because in the quiet between exy and family, kevin day has the time and the love to have the quiet understanding that this is who kevin day is. 

it’s kinda a shitty realization process to go through- kevin starts questioning in the ravens, then immediately goes “No TM !” and internalizes all those feelings 

kevin internalizes All the feelings, always ! compartmentalizing!

bisexuality? put it in a box!

gender identity? put it in a box!

feeling crushing inferiority? put it in a box!

mom died tragically? put it in a box!

ur dad isnt here? put it-

jesus fuck these headcanons were supposed to be happy and it got SO derailed 2 points in

anyways 

post canon, kevin starts to become more comfortable w every aspect of himself, and finally takes the time to have a gender crisis

and then, immediately, decides it was all ridiculous and he was actually a cisgender all along !

he does the dumb thing i did. which is spend about a month going “lmao i’m cis but i wish i wasn’t, i don’t need a gender!” while badly ignoring his gender crisis

it’s renee who finally helps kevin out a little

kevin, dumbass: pfft, gender is stupid, but i’m cis so whatever! renee, nb lesbian icon: are you sure? kevin, having a crisis:

renee actually sends kevin a bunch of links to pages that have lots of words, and “what gender are you” quizes, and dumb memes about being trans/nonbinary and it shouldn’t help as much as it does. 

renee is the first person kevin quietly texts at like, 2 am, and goes, “uh, can you use they, i think?”

her response is, obviously, “of course!”

so they’re like, pretty sure they’re not cis, but they bounce around labels for about a week before they end up settling on genderfluid. 

sometimes kevin day is a boy, with loud opinions and soft hands. sometimes kevin day is a girl, with messy hair and a bright smile. sometimes kevin day is neither, with clumsy limbs and determined eyes

(however- kevin day can always outclass any striker on a court.) 

it just feels right, in a way nothing else did. 

theyre like,,, super nervous about coming out, like, they can’t even come up with the courage to tell their dad they’re bi, how the fuck are they gonna end up telling anyone else? solution! don’t.

except kevin is becoming more comfortable with every aspect of themself, and being casually bisexual around the foxes (nicky makes one too many jokes about kevin’s “”hetero guy crush”” on jeremy and they end up snapping “bitch i’m bi there’s nothing hetero about it.” and nicky is immediately like !!!!!!!!!!!!!) (but thats another post)

so kevin, with the growing comfort that yes, you can be non-heterosexual and non-cisgender and still be fucking amazing at exy, they start to come out

it’s a slow process because when they tried to do it all at once, they got tongue tied and just walked away without saying anything. so they end up doing it individually. 

allison first (because renee can be there and give support AND bc allison is also A Trans), and kevin whispers, “so, I’m genderfluid.”

allison, casually: what are your pronouns? kevin: she/her. i’m a girl today. allison, with all the softness of someone who has been there: do you want me to do your makeup? kevin, with all the softness of someone who’s new to this: maybe one day.

after allison is andrew+neil, because they spend so much time together at night practice it’s inevitable it comes up

and by that i mean kevin screams halfway through night practice “THIS IS GENDERFLUIDPHOBIA” because andrew keeps blocking her shots. 

andrew flips her off.

neil asks if thats an actual term.

kevin says to fuck off and keep practicing.

next is wymack. 

oh boy. 

so kevin isn’t even sure how to be a good son- she has no idea how to go about being a good daughter. she has no clue how to be a good child. 

she doesn’t know if wymack even wants that.

but she goes to him after practice and he snaps, “what is it?” in a voice thats maybe a little less gruff than usual

and she says, “i’m genderfluid.”

he stares at her for a while.

she continues, “i’m a girl today, actually, and i just thought you should know.”

wymack asks, “you’ll tell me when it changes, right?”

kevin nods and leaves. 

its a start.

telling jean feels like a really big deal, but in hindsight its about fifteen minutes of bad puns that follow an awkwardly worded coming out. 

kevin: so like... guys right jean: yes? kevin: what if... i wasn’t one jean: are you trying to come out to me? kevin: is it working?

the rest of the monsters follows after that- aaron obviously doesnt understand, but he doesnt say anything rude. (he looks into it later). nicky, immediately, takes a supportive role.

nicky: I’M GONNA STAPLE A GENDERFLUID FLAG TO MY FACE THATS HOW MUCH I SUPPORT YOU kevin, softly: please don’t how would you play exy.

matt and dan get a less official coming out, because kevin isn’t sure how to be friends with them at all. but they manage a “so, i’m not a guy, actually, i’m genderfluid, and right now i don’t have a gender.”

dan gives them a set of pronoun bracelets for their birthday and matt gives them a book about the history of the nonbinary community and yeah, maybe this is how to be friends.

the baby foxes don’t get to find out. kevin doesn’t trust them as much, and isn’t ready to be... out out. 

kevin has absolutely no desire to change their name, at all.

kevin: why would i change my name i’m an ICON.

WAIT i lied,,, they change their middle name to kayleigh. 

the first time kevin gets invited to a girls night, she cries

its a surprise, which is hard to plan- girls nights are always on tuesdays, so they have to wait for a tuesday where kevin is free and feels like a girl

renee casually mentions that they have a history book that kevin might like, so she should come pick it up

and then in the dorm, dan and allison are setting up a movie and popcorn and renee is getting her nails painted. dan waves kevin over and tells her to pick a movie, allison tells her to pick out a nail polish, and renee actually does have a history book for her.

kevin finally accepts a make over from allison. 

she cries like five times that night and tries to brush it off as nothing but... kevin can finally exist in a space, and feel welcome, and also feel... wanted.

it’s a good feeling

kevin, wearing a crop top with the genderfluid flag on it, painting renee’s nails as they watch the trojans game: lmao can you imagine thinking i was cis? what was i thinking? i was so dumb lol.  renee, sweetly: no it was a perfectly normal reaction to being raised in a cisnormative society, and i’m very proud of you for figuring out that it wasn’t right for you kevin: dammit renee why do you have to be so kind and supportive just let me make jokes about my moron-ness in PEACE 

kevin day is the fucking QUEEN of exy !!!!!!! she’s better than you and you know it. 

each and every day kevin day hears misogonistic comments towards female exy players and each and every day kevin day wants to scream B I T C H in their face

he wanted to do this even before he figured out he was genderfluid bc kevin day drank respect women juice before realizing he was also drinking sometimes i am women juice

kevin actually 100% hates dresses a lot bc they can never find any that are a good texture and its Sensory Hell, and also you cant play exy in them?? what the fuck??? 

they end up liking crop tops and short shorts, and a few kinds of makeup, but skirts and dresses are dumb and itchy actually 

kevin goes on an impassioned rant about this at LEAST once a month

you know that really good feeling when you wake up one day and you realize you’re happier knowing who you are and maybe it’s rough and maybe it’s not perfect but you get to know who you are and your friends respect and love you for who you are and you start to realize you love knowing you too????????

yeah.

kevin day is genderfluid and this is my hill to die on thank you and good night

[hermannsthumb]

OK PART ONE OF HORNY NEWT/HERMANN ASKS IVE GOTTEN SINCE LIKE OCTOBER: CLOTHING (copied and pasted so it’s easier than trying to load a bunch of pictures of asks)

18+/not sfw below cut!

SECTION A: THE PARKA

Anonymous said: Newt wearing Hermann’s parka and nothing else is the equivalent of lingerie.

Anonymous said: Whenever Newt falls asleep on the lab sofa, Hermann will cover Newt up with his parka. Sometimes Newt pretends to be asleep just so he can have Hermann cover him up with Hermann’s perfect parka that’s so soft and warm and smells like Hermann. After they get together (once Hermann realizes how much Newt loves his parka), Hermann will offer it to Newt like a prize. “Darling, if you strip naked, then go put on those pale purple lacy stockings you look so precious in, I’ll let you wear my parka.”

Anonymous said: Newt wearing Hermann’s giant parka with nothing underneath. Hermann loves it.

SECTION B: you are all very horny for hermann in lingerie. and i mean like very

Anonymous said: Newt gets Hermann a pair of pretty lace stockings with a galaxy print. Hermann loves them!

Anonymous said: Newt dresses Hermann up in a pair of frilly stockings and his own leather jacket (which is adorable short on Hermann). Newt really loves the booty out look on Hermann, okay?

Anonymous said: Ugh, Newt putting stockings on Hermann and adjusting them so they’re just right is such a sexy, beautifully intimate mental image.

Anonymous said: What does Newt want for his birthday? “Hermann, baby, go change into that dainty little pink dress with the matching stockings, then lie down on the bed and let me spread your perfect supermodel legs and treat you like precious little slut you are.”

Anonymous said: At least one year on Newt’s birthday, Newt 100% tells Hermann not to do anything. “I’ve got it all covered, babe.” That evening, Newt presents Hermann with the softest, daintiest, prettiest little lacy dress and matching stockings that Hermann’s ever seen. “Hermann, since it’s my birthday, I think you should change into this and let me have my way with you.” “You just want to dress me up and shag me so hard that the neighbors complain about the noise.” “Yeah, sound good?” “It sounds perfect.”

Anonymous said: Oh god, Newt using Hermann as his own personal dress up doll is everything I’ve ever wanted. “Newton, you’re being absurd.” “Do you not want the stockings?” “Of course I want the stockings, but I can put them on myself.” “But I *WANT* to put them on you!” “Oh! Oh, well…(blushes) go ahead then.” “And of course you’ll need me to tie your sash just right.” “Oh, of course.” “It may take a few tries to get it perfect.” “Take as much time as you need, darling.”

Anonymous said: Whenever Newt buys pretty stockings for Hermann, Newt always insists on putting them on Hermann’s legs himself. “Newton, this is hardly necessary.” “Pfft, like I’m gonna miss an opportunity to grope at your sexy supermodel legs. And look at that! I was right about the pale pink! See how nice the color looks with your pale skin and dark hair and your big brown doe eyes?” “Darling, you’re being ridiculous.” “Ooh, I should get ribbons to tie in bows around your throat and wrists!”

Anonymous said: Newt loves seeing Hermann in lovely lacy stockings, not just because Hermann loves wearing them (though that is a factor), and not just because Hermann looks *SO* incredibly gorgeous in lacy stockings (though that is DEFINITELY a VERY BIG factor), but also because Hermann feels confident when he’s wearing lacy stockings. Like, Hermann still loves to play all shy and coy, but Newt knows that a stocking-clad Hermann is a Hermann who wants to get manhandled and fucked good and hard.

Anonymous said: Sometimes Newt comes home like “Hermann, I had a really long day! Can you put on a pretty bralette and some sexy stockings and let me ride your dick?” “…I am certainly not averse to the idea, but will it help you feel better?” “Lots better, dude.” “Then of course. Let me go change. Do you have a specific color you’d like?” “Ooh, can you wear the soft pink bralette and stockings? That’ll be nice and relaxing for me.” “Whatever you want, darling.”

Anonymous said: Newt lives Hermann in dresses, but Newt also super loves Hermann in just one of his delicate frilly/lacy/silky blouses and a pair of pretty stockings. That way, Newt can enjoy Hermann in pretty clothes, AND Hermann with his adorable butt exposed. Hermann’s a little embarrassed at first, but he slowly gains confidence as he sees just how much Newt loves it.

Anonymous said: Newt loves to dress Hermann in pretty little lace bralettes, because Newt knows that Hermann loves the feel of lace against his very sensitive nipples.

Anonymous said: Newt gets Hermann lacy bralettes to wear! (Because lacy bralettes feel so nice and sexy sensual when you have sensitive nipples. Ooh, and silk/satin bralettes! Those are amazing too!)

Anonymous said: Newt gets Hermann a light pink lingerie ensemble, but they don’t get anywhere past just making out because Newt can’t stop cooing over how precious Hermann looks all dolled up pink lace and silk and bows.

SECTION C: also hermann in dresses

Anonymous said: Can I offer a nice mental image: Hermann feeling dainty and feminine but wanting to shake things up a bit, so Newton gets home to find that Hermann’s “"stolen”“ one of his punk outfits, tartan minidress held together by safety pins, and he m a y have had some fun with eyeliner, and Newton practically comes in his pants on the spot :’)

Anonymous said: Newt lacing up Hermann’s dresses is such a lovely thought. Newt loves seeing the pretty fabric mold to Hermann’s trim little waist and slim hips. "Hermann, after dinner, you’re gonna sit down on the bed and hold your skirt up for me like a good boy. You’re gonna be my dessert.”

Anonymous said: Sometimes (only in the privacy of his and Newt’s own space, of course) Hermann wears super short skirts with petticoats (or whatever it is that makes skirts all cute and puffed up) and just bends over a lot, until Newt’s finally like “Okay, you and your cute little butt are coming to bed for some serious make out time.” And Newt, obviously, picks Hermann up and carries him to bed because Newt’s too impatient and he wants to kiss and grope his husband right now dammit.

SECTION D: clothing swappingggg

Anonymous said: Sometimes Newt walks around the house in nothing but one of Hermann’s shirts/sweaters (sometimes to tease Hermann, sometimes just bc Newt’s too lazy to get dressed completely)&it always ends the same way. Hermann holds out for as long as he can, but eventually he just snaps like “Newton, bend over the kitchen table at once!” Newt loves it, he loves when Hermann pounds into him while lecturing him on what a wicked little tease he is & how he should know better & “What am I going to do with you?”

Anonymous said: Once newmann get together, Newt somehow convinces Hermann to wear his (Newt’s) tiny little super tight booty shorts. Once Newt sees Hermann in those itty bitty shorts, Newt immediately forgets every single science thing he’s ever learned.

SECTION E: SOCK GARTERS

Anonymous said: Newt’s kink for Hermann’s sock garters sustains me tbh. “Of course you have to wear sock garters. Must be damn near impossible to find socks that are small enough to stay up on your slender, elegant calves, and your dainty little ankles. But you gotta have tall socks, ‘cause you don’t have any fat to keep you warm. That’s why I’m here, baby. ;) I’m your soft, warm, colorful pillow. ;)”

[stephanine-sims]

Couple Interview Tag 

Rules: answer the questions from your OC otp’s point of view and tag as many people as you want. You can do as many couples as you want it could be an otp you intend to get together but hasn’t got together yet or whatever haha… I’m just nosy and wanna know about your oc’s so tag me if you want!. You can be as creative as you want make a story out of it whatever do it however you want just answer the questions simply its up to you!

I was tagged by @shysimblr! Thank you sm bby 💖 This was so much fun! I tag @mysteriousdane​, @surreysimmer​, @dustysunflowers​, @sim-bubble​, @purplesimmer455​, @iffysimmer​, @applezingsims​, @smallcowplant​, @racingllama​ and anyone else who wants to do this 💖😘 

I’ll put this under a read more bc it got so loooong lmao

1.  How did you two meet?

Rowan: “Well, Neil moved in next doors when I was... 6 maybe? I don’t remember exactly. Something like that?”  Neil: “Sounds about right. Wow, that means I’ve known you for over 20 years now. That’s insane.” 

2. Who is the most Jealous of you two?

Neil: “Hm... I don’t know actually? I’m not a very jealous person but you’re also not.”  Rowan: *shakes head* “No, not really.”  Neil: “So I guess that would be me? Sometimes when a random dude on the streets of San Myshuno whistles at you, I wish I could show them my fists up close..” Rowan: *laughs* “Pfft, like you’d ever.” Neil: “Nah, not really. But sometimes I wish I could.”

3. What’re your 3 favourite Physical things about your partner?

Neil: “I love the few freckles you have. Like the one above your eyebrows and the one just below your lips. And I like your smile a lot. When you’re happy, you just.. radiate it. I like that a lot.”  Rowan: “Naww.. Stop it. You’re too sweet.”  Neil: “Oh and for the last one, I love your ass too.” Rowan: “Oh my god..” Neil: *grins* “Well... Your turn.” *laughs* Rowan: “Oh, right..” *smiles* “I, um.., I really like your smile too. And you have really nice hair. It’s really, really soft and I’m super jealous. And... your abs.”  Neil: *grins*

4. Who’s more likely to be running late?

Rowan: “Neil.”  Neil: *laughs* “Me, definitely. But I try my best, okay.” 

5. Who is the most organised and who is the messiest?

Neil: *laughs* “I’m definitely the messy one.”  Rowan: *groans* “You should’ve seen that one time he used the dorm kitchen to cook dinner for us. It was a MESS.” Neil: “But the food was good, you gotta admit!”  Rowan: *nods* “The food was good. I never questioned your cooking skills... just your cleaning skills.” 

6. Who is the bigger flirt? (flirts the most?)

Rowan: “Is that even a question, honestly?”  Neil: “It’s you, of course, my sweet honey bun..”  Rowan: *smiles awkwardly at camera* “Yes.... Definitely me.” 

7. Who does the most cooking?

Neil: “I’d say we divide the work evenly? If I’m working late, Ro cooks for me, and reverse.”  Rowan: *nods*

8. How do you feel about kids and do you want them? If so how many?

Rowan: “They’re the cutest. I do want kids at some point of my life.” Neil: *nods* “I want kids too. Maybe one or two? I don’t know, honestly..” Rowan: “The more the better.” Neil: *scoffs* “Ah, I don’t know about that.”  

9. Who wears the pants in the relationship?

Neil: “Rowan, I’d say.”  Rowan: “Definitely not me.” *laughs*

10. What’s your partner’s least favourite housework task?

Neil: “Hm... That’s a hard one. My best guess would be doing the dishes?”  Rowan: “Nope. I hate ironing clothes the most.”  Neil: “Then why do it..” Rowan: “Because wrinkles are even worse! Either way, Neil hates vacuuming.” Neil: “Vacuuming SUCKS. Hehe, get it?”  Rowan: “... Someone save me.”

11. What was the first thing you noticed about each other?

Neil: “Oh, I hardly remember. Her blue-green mixed eyes, I guess?” Rowan: “His hair.” 

12. What does your partner do that pisses you off?

Rowan: “Neil tends to whistle when he’d doing mindless jobs like cleaning or cooking. And he’s very bad at whistling.. It hurts my ears.”  Neil: “Ro is very particular about having the house squeaky clean. Sometimes I leave clothes lying around the bedroom that I plan to wear later but then when I look for them later, they’re gone! And I find them back in the laundry basket, because Ro cleaned them up. It’s nice to have clean house but I keep losing my stuff..”

13. Where’s the craziest/weirdest place you’ve ever had sex?

Rowan: “Oh boy..”  Neil: “I don’t think Ro would like to have this information out in the OPEN.. If you know what I mean..” *grins* Rowan: “Oh my god, Neil!” 

14. Do you know your partner’s love language, if yes what is it?

Rowan: “Neil is more about gestures than he is about words. He’d do small things for me to make my life a bit easier and I appreciate it lots.. Whenever he uses words, he expresses his love in the form of embarrassing me in public by calling me odd but sweet names.”  Neil: “Rowan is really good with words and can always exactly convey how she’s feeling without making it too loveydovey and awkward. It’s really nice, actually.” 

15. Where do you see the 2 of you in 10 years?

Neil: “That’s a hard question. I don’t even think about what to have for dinner tomorrow. I don’t know.. Maybe a nice house somewhere in Brindleton Bay. That would be nice.”  Rowan: “I’d like to have my own vet clinic. And be married and have fifty kids.”  Neil: “Oh, heck no.”  Rowan: “Oh, heck yes.”

[idealisticrealism]

Blindspot 4x03

Had a busy Halloween week (my first ever!) so I’m extra late today. Also changed my format slightly bc what is consistency?

Reade-- What is there to say, other than he looks super cute covered in paint? It’s kinda weird that the usual ‘main team’ has barely been seen this whole ep-- and even then, mostly only through brief video calls or over the comms. And Reade wasn’t even heard from at all during the actual bomb disarming. Honestly though…. I’m kinda down with that. As much as I love the others, we all know Rich and Patterson are my Dream Team lol

Zapata-- yep there’s Zapata, jogging slowly away from her problems as usual lol. Seriously though what is she doing being apprenticed to a literal evil witch EXPLAIN GERO. Ugh I feel so bad for her but a little bit ‘serves you right’ at the same time. Though lbr I just want her to come homeeeee

Weller-- I feel like this dude has been on the edge of tears for like a year. Poor guy. But omg does he make a cuuuute Jackson Pollock lol. I love him being all serious and sarcastic towards Madeline while literally covered in paint and feathers. I feel like the real mystery of this ep is HOW DOES IT MAKE HIM HOTTER. Someone please explain. Also oooh he cannot be happy about being stuck in the station while ‘Jane’ is zooming away on a doomed train. ALSO SPEAKING OF WHICH, dude the bomb is on one of the lines past the apartment I lived in back in September. I got off at that station multiple times aaaahhhhhh this is so cool. Ugh now he’s back at the apartment crying over Jane again ahah. Seems like all the poor dude does these days is hug her and cry. But wait, maybe not! Ooooh he followed her and he has got his suspicion on. THERE’S the badass agent we’ve been missing!

Remi-- I feel like she actually feels a tiny bit bad that she made Weller cry?? Lol girl’s supposed to be killing him and she has a hard time even seeing him cry. Lbr she’s gonna fall for him despite herself, his mix of badass agent and suburban dad is apparently just irresistible to any iteration of her being lol. Tbh I loved the sequence of her disarming the bomb over the comms-- in most eps we would be with her and Weller and Reade out in the field and only hearing the home team over the comms, I loved seeing this turnabout. Also ugh she nearly lashes out at Weller when he lifts her hand bc she’s such an abused little puppy that she doesn’t know anything but coldness or punishment and I think she was startled and secretly pleased to be greeted with cheers and hailed as a hero. Ugh Remi honey you’re gonna grow to love it here. “... right under our noses, putting on a friendly face, pretending to be the hero” I guess she’s seeing some similarities between herself and Madeline lol. And then oooh on the couch, Roman’s like the devil on the shoulder trying to pull her back into the deep shadows of the dark side and then Weller appears and shines all his love and support all over her and Roman disappears for a moment. I see what you’re doing here Gero…. Also lol Remi must be surprised at how easily she can make Weller cry haha

Patterson-- okay firstly, how dare some guy make out with my baby and not know her name. Also, I just have mixed feelings about the making out in general but I am all about supporting my precious queen. THen I was like ‘pfft she won’t say her name’ and then SHE SAID HER NAME AND I SCREAMED and then it hit me that she was almost definitely undercover and I was like ‘oh a fake name of course, shit Gero you got me well done’ and then turns out it wasn’t an op but a whole different kind of ‘undercovers’ hahahahaha. Well good on you girl I support you and all your choices. BUT WAS IT A FAKE NAME OR NO??? Omg okay yes it was, thanks for the heart attack Gero. Is anyone else having early Grey’s Anatomy flashbacks rn lol or is that just me haha. Also flustered Patterson is the most adorable Patterson, fight me on it.Ugh poor girl cannot seem to catch a break this ep and you KNOW Rich is deliberately playing with her lol. But also I mean c’mon writers, Patterson is a professional agent, I can see her being flustered to start but let’s not act like she wouldn’t suck it up and focus on her job pretty quick. Also omg *dead serious voice* “I can already tell you, that I’m gonna scoff” is one of the best lines of the episode and probably the entire show lol. “Okay get to the part where you solved it. Oh my god I just sounded like Weller” hahaha well  he is your big bro, so makes sense you’d pick up a few traits lol. Great throwback to the ‘where math is done’ line too writers, nice work. Also wow the way she just went toe-to-toe with Weitz… why do I ship it a tiny bit lol?? And I also kinda ship her with Lincoln. Get it, girl!

Rich-- how was him being like ‘Hey guys here’s the terrorist’s address okay be careful bye’ one of the funniest things he’s ever done??? I stg whoever writes Rich needs to be my new best friend. Though tbh he does actually seem almost a touch subdued in this first scene, without that usual devilish gleam in his eyes… maybe he’s trying to show he can be both useful AND mature so they don’t actually decide to replace him with Boston haha. “I didn’t say magic, I’m not seven, I said magical cures’ hahahaha my baby. And he’s so excited to brief the recruits ugh. And then omg “sounds like the greatest takedown in FBI history I’m so sorry I missed it” aren’t we all, buddy lol. Also ugh him and his little recruit ducklings LET ME DIE. “There’s a bomber! Who bombs!” literally if someone who had Rich’s sense of humour and talked like he talks were to appear in my life I would marry them on the spot. “He’s probably an angry man with a victim complex, that’s a dangerous combination” OKAY EVERYONE LET’S FACE IT THE BOMBER GUYS CAN GO HOME BECAUSE RICH JUST DROPPED THE BIGGEST BOMB OF THE EPISODE RIGHT THERE. “Oh yeah, would an unprofessional do something like this??” The answer is yes and also marry me. And ugh he says his main reason for going after the book of secrets is because Jane is dying ughhhhh he is too good for this worldddd. Also wtf was that weird cackle when describing Roman that was hilarious. “It’s been very evident all day. Also I am like a sex-narc and you are terrible at lying” EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS MAN AND THIS FRIENDSHIP IS THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD. “It’s very unprofessional, I think that’s what thrills me the most actually” hahahahaha. “This is my smug face, I save it for special occasions” hahahaaha c’mon no he does not, that’s just his normal face but THIS is why I felt he seemed more serious than usual, it was so his face could be extra smug later hahahaha. And the victory dance??? “You and me, Ride or Die”?? Let’s be real I am SO ride or die for these two there is literally nothing more important than this friendship aaaaaaaahhhhhh

Weitz-- I love this sleazy bastard and his weird love/hate feelings towards Zapata and his semi-corrupt work ethic lol. Also omg yasss he told them all about Zapata leaking info to Carter! I wondered if that would ever come out. And omg he’s Patterson’s hookup’s uncle THIS EP IS RIDICULOUS AND I LOVE IT. Also oh no “What am I saying, special treatment’s fine” was hilarious, like uh oh no way am I starting to love Weitz??? I am having feelings about a Patterson/Rich/Weitz dream team haha. “Might be our only shot at [Madeline], so it is unfortunate that you look like that” how does this show do so many characters with their own distinctive styles of sass I love it so much. Also, show of hands, who thinks this guy is on some kind of uppers because honestly at this stage I’m convinced haha. He’s especially nuts when he comes in to give Patterson the special computer-- which I’m sure that a) she already would have had one of, and b) someone in his postion would have just had someone deliver for him. Although it does seem like he makes any excuse to come hang out and be bizarre. He’s the boss I wish I had lol. Especially if I happened to be related to him bc wow there is some unabashed nepotism happening right here haha. Oh dear he seems to be coming down off his high right now and is getting grumpy. Better call his assistant to bring his next hit lol. Also “CAN YOU JUST CHECK HIS WORK PLEASE” clearly withdrawing-Weitz has no time for workplace flirting hahahaha. And ugh then Patterson stands up to him and he listens to her and holy shit that was a big amount of trust, if they were wrong the whole city is gonna turn on him for letting so many more people die than was necessary. Looks like he doesn’t just always do what protects his own ass??

Afreen-- you are a queen and I love you

[arcanelaurels]

I’ve been super into taakitz college AU, could you write them meeting for the first time, like humping into each other at a party or something like that? ❤️❤️

Anon I’m fucking DYING did you mean to say “humping” or “bumping” bc I’m???? losing my goddamn MIND akdsknksljk 

I love this and now I gotta write both

Kravitz hated parties. He didn’t even know why he kept going to them. Maybe it was the idea of putting off schoolwork for another night. Maybe it was the free alcohol. Or maybe it was the hesitant promise of meeting someone new and exciting, of having a good time.

But that never happened. No, instead it always ended up the same way. Him being too self-conscious to get any further gone than tipsy while everyone around him got plastered. On the dance floor, people clung to each other in the darkness and the heat and the music that was so loud it was practically suffocating. He never asked anyone to dance. Occasionally, girls emboldened by alcohol would approach him, but he simply refused, not bothering to explain that they weren’t exactly his type.

It got to the point - the way it always did - where Kravitz felt like if he spent another second here he would suffocate. He drained the last of his drink and threw the cup aside, preparing himself to make his way across the dance floor since it was the only way to get to the exit.

He started pushing his way through the throng of people, not even bothering to excuse himself because he knew they would forget within seconds. He was nearly out of the sea of people when he felt warm arms wrap around his neck and an even warmer body press up against his side. Flustered and surprised, he looked down and immediately felt a blush rise to his face when he recognized Taako.

Kravitz didn’t know him, per se. They were in the same large lecture class of more than a hundred students, and under normal circumstances someone from that class would’ve been insignificant to him.

Except that Taako had a very…distinctive look. He always arrived to class dressed like he was a grown version of a Disney Channel character, with questionable layers of clothing and odd accessories that somehow worked, probably just because it was him. He tended to sleep through class, only waking up when the professor would notice his snoozing and ask him a question about the material (because she was that kind of professor). Every single time, Taako answered the question perfectly and then almost immediately went back to sleep. Kravitz often wondered why he even bothered to show up at all, and was certain that Taako didn’t even know he existed.

How Taako had been at this party this long without Kravitz’s knowledge was a mystery. But that question was pushed out of his mind because right now Taako was very drunk and…well…grinding against his leg.

Kravitz froze, unsure how to react as Taako swayed and ran his hands over him, occasionally flipping his half-undone braid over his shoulder before pressing closer to him. Panicking, Kravitz took Taako’s hands and pried them off of him, only to have them return as soon as he tried to move away. He needed to get some air now, so he quickly moved away and off the dance floor, vaguely registering that Taako was still clinging to him.

They got to the door and Kravitz turned back to try to unstick Taako from him again, only for him to groan and pout, walking his fingers up Kravitz’s chest.

“Wha’s wrong, handsome?” Taako’s voice was barely loud enough to be heard over the music. “Dunno how to dance?” He leaned in closer, his breath hot in Kravitz’s ear. “Why don’ we go back t’ my place and’ll teach ya?”

Kravitz swallowed dryly, his face burning. “You’re drunk,” He argued back loudly.

Taako’s pout deepened. “And you’re no fun. I’ve-I’ve seen you,” He slurred, swaying and using Kravitz to stay upright. “You’re the guy who stares ‘t me in class. You’re lucky you’re fuckin’…hot.”

Kravitz hadn’t thought his face could heat up anymore than it was, but he was proven wrong. “I don’t-”

“But if you,” Taako interrupted, jabbing a finger to Kravitz’s chest. “Dont’ wanna fuck me,” He pointed to himself. “Then I’ll jus’ find someone else.” He stood up a bit straighter and turned away.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Kravitz grabbed Taako by the wrist. “I don’t think that’s the best idea.” Taako was definitely not in a good state to be making those kinds of decisions. 

Taako willingly let himself be pulled back, overdoing it and pressing himself against Kravitz’s chest. He smirked up at him. “Hmm, change your mind?”

Kravitz looked around, feeling the crowd and the music start to overwhelm him again. “Why don’t we step outside?” He asked and, not waiting for an answer, opened the door and guided Taako out of the house.

It was a cool fall evening and the wind was extremely refreshing after the humidity of the party. Kravitz felt himself start to relax almost immediately while Taako shivered, instinctively pressing against him for warmth only to pull away again.

“Jeez, homie, you’re fuggin’ freezing,” He looked Kravitz up and down. “What are you?”

“Kind of a rude way to ask that,” Kravitz dodged the question as he led Taako to the steps and sat them both down on the edge. He took off his jacket and put it around Taako’s shoulders, who immediately took it and pulled it tighter around him. Kravitz took out his phone and ordered an Uber.

“Thought you were a human,” Taako muttered as he leaned his head on Kravitz’s shoulder. Kravitz didn’t bother pointing out that most humans didn’t have dark red eyes. The breeze picked up and he saw Taako’s free ear twitch a bit in reaction. 

“You sure you don’t wanna fuck?” Taako spoke up again.

Kravitz snorted. “Maybe some other time. As long as you’re sober and still want to.”

“Pfft.” Taako lifted his head, his unfocused eyes somewhat trained to Kravitz’s face. “I’ve been wanting to fuck you since the first day of class, my dude,” He said, prompting Kravitz to blush again.

Taako’s eyes suddenly narrowed and he stared at Kravitz more intently. He leaned forward as if intending to kiss him, but Kravitz leaned back, pressing a hand to Taako’s chest to stop him.

“Again,” Kravitz said, trying to stay composed as he pushed Taako into an upright position and sat back up. “You’re drunk.”

Taako scoffed. “Course I decide to go after a gentleman,” He grumbled. “And I thought today couldn’t get any worse.”

“What do you mean?”

Taako eyed him warily. “I don’t owe you my life story, kemosabe.”

Kravitz laughed nervously. “Sorry, didn’t mean to pry.”

“Ugh,” Taako leaned his head against Kravitz’s shoulder again. “There you go being nice again. Just like my sister’s stupid boyfriend. She’s been in love with the guy for years. Years. Who the fuck waits that long before making a move? It’s like…who are you and what have you done with my sister, yanno?”

Kravitz did not know. He made a noncommittal noise.

“Anyway I’ve never met the guy before and she refused to show me any pictures of him. But they’re dating now and I met him and?” His pitch rose like he was asking a question and he lifted his head again to look at Kravitz. “He’s a fuggin’ nerd. He wears jeans like, every day. Blue jeans. He’s gonna make her like, start caring about school or somethin’. Turn her into a nerd too so she’s not fun anymore. My sister’s dating a nerd, Krav. Can you believe that?”

You know my name? Kravitz wanted to ask, feeling a strange warmth in his chest. Instead, he shrugged. “I’ve never met your sister, but if she’s anything like you, I doubt that’ll happen,” He chuckled. “And besides, as long as he’s a good person and cares about her, does it matter?”

Taako narrowed his eyes at him and was silent for a few moments. “You’re a nerd, too, aren’t you?”

Kravitz laughed nervously. “That’s-”

Taako interrupted him with a groan. “Gods, what is this, karma or something? Of course I’ve got a crush on a nerd, too.”

“I’m not- You have a crush on me?” Kravitz asked, struggling to process what Taako had said.

“I called you hot, didn’t I?” Was his only response, as if that was enough of an explanation.

Kravitz was trying to find something to say when a car pulled up a little ways away and he got his Uber notification. “C’mon,” He grunted as he stood up and pulled Taako up with him. 

They got into the car with some trouble from an off-balance Taako. The driver was a larger man who wasn’t paying much attention to them. “Ready to go?” He asked.

“Um, if it’s not too much trouble, could we make another stop before you take me to my place?” Kravitz asked, untangling Taako’s arms from around him.

“Sure thing, buddy,” The man answered, taking his phone off of its stand and preparing to put in a new address. “Where to?”

“Uh,” Kravitz turned to Taako, who was staring with intent confusion at the seat belt that he was holding in his hand, not having buckled up yet. “Where do you live?”

“Wherever you want me to, sweet cheeks,” Taako responded, doing his best to give Kravitz a sexy glance through half-lidded eyes that just ended up looking comical.

Hearing his voice, the driver turned around. “Taako?”

Taako’s face lit up. “Mags! Fancy meetin’ you here!”

“You two know each other?” Kravitz asked, leaning over to help Taako buckle in.

“Yeah, we’re friends,” The man explained, sounding a bit irritated now. “Don’t worry, I know where he lives. I’m Magnus, by the way.” He shifted gears and started driving. “You one of Taako’s conquests? You’re not taking advantage of my boy, are you?”

Kravitz felt his face heat up again as he finished buckling Taako up, very aware of his hot breath on his neck. He sat back in his seat. “N-No, I’m not. We ran into each other at that party and, well,” He glanced over at Taako before catching Magnus’s eye in the rearview mirror. “I was worried about his safety.”

“Aww, are you sweet on him?” Magnus asked, laughing when Kravitz spluttered. “I’m kidding, thanks for keeping an eye out for him. Taako doesn’t always make the best decisions.”

“I’m right here,” Taako crossed his arms defensively.

“Good thing, too,” Magnus said. “What were you thinking, going to a party alone? Were you trying to get yourself hurt? Or worse?”

Taako scoffed. “I can hold my own. I’ve got magic powers, you know.”

“So do lots of other people,” Magnus argued. “You’re lucky he’s a decent guy,” He jabbed his thumb over his shoulder in Kravitz’s direction. “Or gods know what could’ve happened to you.”

“Whatever,” Taako grumbled, sinking down in his seat and looking out the window. There was a tense silence that Kravitz felt had to do with something other than Taako’s lackluster decisions tonight.

After a while, Magnus sighed. “You know Lup still loves you, right? Just because she’s serious about this boyfriend doesn’t change that. She’s your sister.”

“Duh,” Taako sneered. “Doesn’t mean I have to like him.”

“Look, you guys have been inseparable since birth, I get that,” Magnus continued, unfazed by Taako’s rudeness. “But you had to know that you’d grow apart eventually. She’ll find someone - maybe this guy, maybe not - and you will, too. Probably.”

Taako continued staring out the window, unresponsive.

Kravitz didn’t notice when Magnus glanced at him in the rearview mirror with a glimmer of mischief in his eye. “What about that guy in your Conjuration lecture? The one you said is super hot?”

Taako’s ears perked up and he stiffened, side-eyeing Magnus. “I dunno what you’re talking about.”

“You know, the guy who sits across the aisle from you? The one you said always dresses super nicely and has cheekbones that could cut glass?”

Taako was silent, but Kravitz could see a blush start to form on his cheeks. Kravitz shifted uncomfortably in his seat, feeling like he knew where this might be going.

Magnus continued. “Yeah, you said you wanted to wind your hands in his hair and push him up against a wall-”

“Magnus.”

“-and let him suck marks into your neck that’d be impossible to hide-”

“Magnus.”

“-and give him what I think you called the ‘blowjob of the century’ and then-”

“MAGNUS!”

“What was his name? Kravitz?”

Taako groaned, his face beet red as he put his head in his hands and refused to look over at Kravitz, who wished he could disappear into his seat.

“Magnus, I’m gonna kill you,” Taako’s voice was muffled by his hands.

“Why?” Magnus asked, poorly feigning innocence. He glanced at Kravitz in the rearview mirror. “What did you say your name was, again?” He asked cheekily.

“I didn’t,” Kravitz muttered, refusing to meet his gaze as his face burned. He knew that Magnus got his name from the app.

“We’re here!” Magnus chirped, pulling into an apartment complex that Kravitz realized was right next to the one he lived in. He punched in the gate code and expertly drove around and stopped in front of what Kravitz assumed was Taako’s building. He turned around in his seat. “You live in the complex next door, right?”

“Yeah, I can- I can walk from here,” Kravitz said, rushing to unbuckle himself and get out. He didn’t really want to spend any amount of time alone with Magnus right now.

He walked around the car and opened the door for Taako, who practically fell out and had to be caught by Kravitz. Taako quickly pulled away, not meeting Kravitz’s eye or thanking him.

“Don’t forget to tip!” Magnus shouted out the open window before driving away.

The two stood in an awkward silence for a few moments.

Taako turned to him. “That guy’s a liar and not my friend.”

“So then you didn’t say any of those things?” Kravitz asked with a humorous glance.

“I-” Taako’s face turned red again. “I might’ve…I might’ve said something…similar.”

Kravitz chuckled and took Taako’s hand, prompting him to finally look up at him.

“Well, I would not be opposed to…going on a date with you,” Kravitz said. “And seeing where the night takes us. Can I see your phone?”

Taako wordlessly pulled his phone out of his back pocket and unlocked it before handing it to Kravitz. 

He put in his number and handed it back. “I hope you’ll text me sometime. When you’re sober, that is,” He smiled. He hesitated for a moment before pulling Taako a bit closer and leaning down to kiss his forehead. “I’ll be wanting that jacket back,” He murmured, then pulled away and turned to start walking home, waving over his shoulder.

Taako stood still in shock, watching Kravitz walk away. His hand automatically rose to where Kravitz had kissed his forehead and he felt himself blush like some sort of middle schooler.

Kravitz turned and called out over his shoulder. “Make sure to drink lots of water! You don’t want a hangover!”

“Shut up!” He shouted back, but couldn’t fight off the smile that crept across his face. He stood there, swaying a bit but determined to watch Kravitz until he couldn’t see him anymore. The wind picked up and he pulled Kravitz’s jacket tighter around himself before he turned around to head inside.

It was definitely a better night than either of them had anticipated.