Aziraphale has done so much to how I perceive strength. He's soft, and kind, and fluffy, and gentle by choice. While presenting masculine, he has many feminine-coded traits. When it matters, he is brave and protects others, even at a great cost to himself. He has his own little mannerisms, his 🌟🌟Clues🌟🌟, his terrible French, his magic tricks. We accept all of him as he is in Good Omens, no questions asked. At no time is he aggressive, or violent. He has Crowley, the ultimate suave & sexy speed demon(TM) eating out of the palm of his hand. I love him.
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Let's Beat the Heat; Deuce Spade
Content; Fluff, gender-neutral reader, romance
Word Count; 650+
AN; This is for the lovely @ithseem! Thanks for the request, and I hope you enjoy this Deuce drabble! As a reminder, do not put my work — or others for that matter — into AI as it steals. Link to Masterlist
You were still stuck in Twisted Wonderland, and spending your summer in Ramshackle. It wouldn’t have been horrible; your friends came and visited, brought you out on little day trips, heck, even Crowley was leaving you alone for once. But there was one itty-bitty thing which made it unbearable. There. Was. No. Air. Conditioning. And today was the grossest, most humid, most insufferably hot day of the year. Apparently it hasn’t been this bad in over a decade. So, you were sprawled out on the hardwood floors in a feable attempt to cool down, but you were just sticky and laying on the floor. Absolutely miserable.
There was knocking at the front door. Did I invite anyone over? Ughhhhh it’s too hot for thinking! “Come in,” you groaned, turning your head over to see who decided to come over.
“Hi, love,” Deuce greeted before stopping upon seeing you trying to meld yourself to the floor. He furrowed his brow and then his eyes widened, having come up with a plan. He placed a kiss to your forehead, “I’ll be right back, okay?” And off he went, putting his plan into action.
“Hi, love, bye love,” you sighed. And you just layed on the floor, staring up to the ceiling. Note to self; wring Crowley’s neck the next time I see him for making me stay in this damn place. INSTALL AN AIR CONDITIONER FOR THE LOVE OF SEVEN!
Were you staring at the ceiling for a minute? An hour? You had no clue, but you heard the front door open and shut. Deuce was back, and he was carrying a box of ice pops. “So, it isn’t much, but it should help a bit. But it’s outside.” He reached out his hand, helping you get up. “Up we get… now, close your eyes.”
You gave him a tired look, but followed your boyfriend’s request and closed your eyes. It was too hot to really question what he was up to. At least with Deuce, you knew it would be something sweet, a bit awkward but very endearing. Very slowly, since Deuce was going at a snail’s pace, the both of you got outside. “Can I open them now?” You asked, waiting for the go ahead.
“Yes,” he chuckled nervously, waiting to see your reaction.
And upon opening your eyes you saw a kiddy pool, no deeper than mid calf, filled with water and ice. A smile broke on to your face seeing the bright blue plastic covered in cartoon sea creatures and mermaids. “This was your idea, sweetie?”
He rubbed the back of his neck, “It isn’t much, but I thought it could help. Do… do you like it?”
“Of course I like it,” you laugh, cautiously testing the water with a finger. It was bitterly cold. “It’s perfect! Thanks, love!”
Deuce smiled upon seeing your cheery face and happy laughter, happy to see that your energy was back. “Not as perfect as you.”
Taking an ice pop, you booped him on the nose with it. “You’re also perfect, you know,” you hum.
His cheeks flushed pink at the realization that he said that outloud. Yes, the two of you have been dating for a few months now, but he still found himself blushing. He brought out an ice pop and booped you back on the nose, a soft look in his eyes. “I love you.”
Today might have started off as the hottest day in recent Twisted Wonderland history, but thanks to Deuce, the day had shifted. Yes, it was still hot as Sevens, but due to the sweet actions of your sweet boyfriend, it wasn’t so bad. Maybe getting stuck here wasn’t all that bad. You had the right people… you had your person. And that was enough.
All you needed was Deuce… and some ice pops, and a kiddy pool filled with ice water so you didn’t get heat stroke. But telling Crowley off could wait for another day, for now, beating the heat with your person was far more enjoyable and important.
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the fact that crowley and aziraphale have been speaking in modern day english since the garden of eden will never not be interesting to me. you could argue that they’re communicating in a tongue only comprehensible to celestial (?) beings which is thus being converted into english for the sake of simplicity (because we’re watching the show), yet there are a myriad of instances in which common english idioms, expressions, and euphemisms would have been lost in translation if they were not, in fact, just speaking english. The earliest recorded use of english i said to have been around the 5th to 7th century A.D, but even then, the language hadn’t yet developed into the language we know today. It makes you wonder, doesn’t it?
As I was doing research concerning exactly what it is we know about linguistics in good omens, I came across an old ask on Neil Gaiman’s account which answers several of my questions, but incites just as many.
It makes most sense as both of these possibilities. This confirms 2 things:
1) Lead Balloons were somehow apart of God’s ineffable plan???
2) There’s a language spoken by angels and demons, and we are most probably only hearing a translation.
The amount of possibilities this opens up is insane. It makes you wonder what nuances are being lost in translation. It makes you wonder whether they have their own slangs and expressions both in the up and in the down. It makes you wonder whether there are different dialects of this supposed language.
But it’s impossible that Crowley and Aziraphale are never speaking english. And if they by some slim possibility really aren’t, does that mean that there are cuss words in both heaven and hell which have equivalencies to the ones we have?
It’s funny to think about when Aziraphale and Crowley may have transitioned from speaking in their “native” languages to just plain old english, since there is no doubt in my mind they were doing so in the later millenias. Crowley was probably so conflicted as to how to speak to Jim in season 2. Funny to think about whether he’d often fumble with his languages because the situation was just so darn confusing. Does all of heaven and hell eventually just completely forget about the language they used to speak? What ae the logistics here?
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"So, I put down my sword, you put down your rock, and we face each other as God intended?"
"I could kill you now :)!"
Our Man in Black faces Gabriel! Sure, the giant's hand is the size of Crowley's entire head, but he has humor and good looks on his side. Plus he's a slippery little snake 🐍
Bonus image of Dread Pirate!Crowley living out TV!Crowley's dream:
apparently i'm not stopping until i recreate the entire movie, or at least until my fingers fall off - whichever comes first. the other scenes i've made so far are in my princess omens tag!
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