#*in monty python voice* and now for something completely different

[frauleindermorgen]

@pirrhyc sent:

Pelleas arrives at Micaiah's dorm room in the dead of the night, fresh off the boat that had ferried him back to Fódlan and then the carriage ride that had taken him back to Garreg Mach. He considers knocking on her door but then remembers the hour, settling instead for leaning against her door and waiting for a more normal hour to try, not disturbing her sleep. But in the end, he finds he dozes off. When the morning comes and she inevitably goes to open her door, the force of what he had been leaning against being taken out from behind him sends him careening back, jolting him awake as he unceremoniously flops onto the flooring of her room, staring up at her with now wide eyes and hair splayed on the ground beneath him. The suddenness of it robs him of his thoughts briefly, but after a moment, he clumsily speaks the first thing on his mind. “ I've missed you, Micaiah. ” A beat passes and a realization hits him however, and he begins to add onto that, pulling himself up off the ground as he speaks. “ S-Sorry, this was a bit, uh, strange, wasn't it? I know I was gone a lot longer than I told you though I would be. My apologies. I didn't mean to, I swear... Though I guess my word only means so much now, doesn't it? ” Upright and fussing with the hair at the nape of his neck, he gives her a sheepish smile, trying to figure out his words. “ In any case, I'm glad I finally got here in time. Now that we're both here together, happy birthday, Micaiah. ”  He takes out the wrapped present box he had tucked away in the inside pocket of his jacket and holds it out to her. Inside is a nondescript looking journal, but when one opens it, it is filled margin to margin in Pelleas's own handwriting. “ I know you seemed pretty interested in my cooking before, so I wrote down every recipe I've learned growing up and here at the monastery. I tried to suit them to your tastes though. I know we're not exactly the same, hahaha... There's a few recipes there for remedies too rather than meals. Growing up, I was pretty sickly, so I tried a lot of different things to help me. I don't know if you'd need them, but I figured you might just want to know them still, arrogant as that might make me. ” Micaiah knows plenty on her own that he's certain she didn't need his experiments and knowledge to get by just fine. She endeared people to her and could always learn no matter where she went.

But anything to get her to need to use Sacrifice a little less, just the same as she wished him to exhaust himself a little less too. It is just as much for the sake of those she wishes to heal as well as for her sake for survival in the long-term. She would live a long time regardless, but a part of him hoped to preserve her lifeline for as long as it might go. “ That way, even after I'm long gone one day, you'll still have me. When you help people, I want to be by your side. I want to feel as if I'm helping you and them both, Micaiah. ”  A lifeline that, if everything went as it ought to, would far outlive his own. “ ...Might I? ”

In general, Micaiah is not used to nearly tripping over other people; much less people right outside her bedroom door, and certainly not her rather tall fiancé.

She wants to sternly remind him he has a key for a reason, but having just averted disaster and with him looking up at her like that she finds she rather does not have it in her. She had missed him too.

“It’s alright,” Micaiah says, sitting down next to him once he’s righted himself, “for everything,” she adds, “after all, I trust you.” 

She accepts the present with a smile, beginning to open it up just as Pelleas starts in on explanations - a routine she can say she loves just as much if not more than his thoughtful gifts.

“Every single one?” She marveled. “I knew you had an impressive memory, but this goes beyond that. Some of these surely you had to have come up with on your own…”

Micaiah’s writing is detailed and intricate because she has had so many years of practice inscribing with the ancient tongue and modern alike; she knows it was not the same for Pelleas. It is for this reason every one of his messages he has penned to her is a gift she has kept to this day.

“We both have talked of our faults but this is hardly arrogance,” she says gently, and then he continues on as if having looked into her heart:

even after I'm long gone one day, you'll still have me

She nods rapidly once she realizes he’s turned it into a question, not trusting herself to speak. They want the same thing after all - they’ve always seemed to, just never knowing how to express it.

She sets the journal aside gently and falls into his arms: “of course, I want you with me. Always.”

She may not have had wings on her back but she imagines if she did, they would feel like the weight of that word. There were so many people Micaiah would never let herself forget - Pelleas chief among them.

It was alright if she couldn’t fly, she’d learned to love this small center of gravity all her own.

“Thank you, Pelleas,” she says, content to say in his embrace so long as he is holding her there, “it is a wonderful gift.”

[akanemnon]

CAUGHT UP ON TWIN RUNES AND I LOOOVE HOW THE STORYS GOING RAAAGH. so excited for more (though seriously do not rush yourself. self care important)

[monty python voice] and now for something completely different... (and NOT related to twin runes)

i know youve sort of talked about it, but what are your thoughts on Tenna overall?? i really loved his character, so I'm curious on what you think

I try not to, thanks! Progress has been steady. While the comic is on a break, I have still been working on more pages. That way, I could create a backlog for the next 5 weeks.

As for your question, I like Tenna! What's not to love with him?

[amica-aenigmata-naboo]

Comfortable

Vinnie Hacker x Y/N - Drabble - 1.4K WC NSFW 18+

Masterlist

Warnings: slight angst, dry humping, setting boundaries, consent checks, Vinnie being sweet, lust, SMUT, i really cooked with this one guys - it slaps harder than your mom, female reader, praise like a mf because you deserve it pookie bear, moaning, absolutely pathetic man - as they should be, L bombs, no penetration

---------------------------------------

You smiled politely, thanking Vinnie as he held the door open for you. You’d been to his house before but today was different. He had asked if you wanted to stay the night for the first time. Initially you were excited thinking of all the fun stuff you and him could do and not have to worry about going home. Now… all you could feel was nervous. Your friends had convinced you that his intentions weren’t all pure. Obviously he expected something physical or else he wouldn’t have asked you to stay. You liked Vinnie. A lot. Begrudgingly you were even starting to consider the forbidden L word. And he had been nothing but a gentleman, never pushing you beyond your comfort. Yet your mind swam with anxieties of what you would do or say if things got to a point you didn’t want to pass. You set your bag down with your shoes once inside, looking around at his decorations. The house smelled like him, sweet but gentle and earthy. You felt Vinnie’s arms sneak around your waist, nuzzling his nose in the crook of your neck where he placed a gentle kiss. You smiled, enjoying his presence.

Turning your head, you kissed his cheek “Wanna watch a movie?” you asked.

“What movie?” he mumbled. 

“Labyrinth, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, or Princess Bride?” you said giving him options.

“Princess Bride, hands down.” he said, squeezing your hips. 

You chuckled, turning out of his grip so you could go to the living room. You flopped on the couch, enjoying the many blankets Vinnie had thrown out before you got there as he mentioned building a pillow fort. Vinnie walked into the kitchen as you went and sat on the couch. 

“Wanna put your pajamas on while I make the popcorn?” he asked as he took out a bowl and grabbed the microwave popcorn bags.

You nodded with a smile, happy he wanted you to be comfortable. When you returned from changing in the bathroom you saw Vinnie in the kitchen without a shirt. How did he look so hot doing the most mundane tasks? “Popcorn needs to be made shirtless?” you sassed.

Vinnie laughed, “The butter exploded.”

“Rookie mistake.”

Vinnie brought the giant bowl of popcorn over, sitting it on the two of your laps so you could cuddle. Towards the end of the movie your eyes felt heavy, not in a sleepy way but in a relaxed way. Completely comfortable and happy. The warm expanse of his chest against your cheek, his arm circling your waist. You never wanted to move. You leaned up, kissing his cheek sweetly. 

“What is it baby?” Vinnie said, his eyes tracing every curve of your face. He smiled seeing how relaxed you look.

“I’m just… happy.” You said with a content sigh.

Vinnie ran his hand up and down your waist, his warmth made you lean into him even more so your foreheads were touching. His hand stilled on your hip, letting the tips of his fingers slipping under the hem of your shirt. Your breath hitched, your hand flying to his. 

“Sorry…” was all you could think to say.

Vinnie’s eyes softened, his hand moving from your waist to cradle your face, “Baby, you never have to be sorry for having boundaries. We never have to do anything you don't wanna do.” he smiled at you sincerely. 

You breathed a sigh of relief, “I just…  is this the only reason you wanted me to stay over?” you asked, not meeting his gaze, your voice felt small. 

“Honey, of course not. I’m sorry if I gave you that impression. I guess I just… wanted to make you feel… good?” he said, sounding a bit shy. A slight pink settling on his cheeks. 

You sat back a little bit, your mind was stunned with that little revelation. Nobody had ever done that for you before. Focused on your pleasure more than theirs. You looked between his eyes and his lips with want.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispered.

You nodded.

“I need you to say it baby.” he said, leaning in slightly.

You closed the gap, your lips meeting his gently. But you wanted more; you wanted to devour him and be devoured by him. 

He responded to your touch, holding your angelic face. You gave into yourself - fuck what your friends said. You wanted him just as much as he wanted you. You sat up, as did Vinnie so you were both sitting up on the couch instead of laying down. You straddled his lap as he leaned back against the cushion, admiring the view of you taking control. 

“Is.. is it ok if we just make out?” you asked.

“Of course,” Vinnie said, holding your hips. “Anything else?” he asked.

“Feel me, kiss my neck… Please…” you stuttered slightly, already wildly turned on by him. 

Vinnie nodded, leaning forward to kiss up your stomach before pulling you closer and pushing your hips down so you were flush against his lap and finally face to face. One of his hands clasped around your throat but didn’t squeeze, he wanted to guide you. He gently pulled you to him, kissing you softly before you sped up, needily feeling over each other. Your tongues tangled together before he moved on to kiss down your neck sloppily. He gave you a slight nip, testing the waters. When you moaned at the contact he gave you another, and another, and another. Smoothing his tongue over them to relax the slight pain. Your breaths were erratic, your heart pounding fiercely. 

“You ok?” he asked, checking in with you.

You smiled at him hazily, still lost in the feeling of him. You nodded slowly.

“Words baby.” he said, kissing your neck softly trailing up from your neck to your cheek. 

“Please don’t stop.” you said, out of breath.

Vinnie bit his lip as he looked up at you. You were flush, looking needy for him. Your eyes looked hungry, feral. Vinnie slowly pushed your hips down so you were grinding against his clothed cock. He was unbelievably hard. “How’d you get hard so quick?” you chuckled softly. 

“Because it knows you want it.” he mumbled, his voice deep and heavy with lust. His hands gripped your hips tightly, slowly starting to rock you back and forth. The thin fabric of your shorts doing nothing to dull the pleasure the grinding was doing for you. You let your eyes roll back, letting him take the lead and guide your body - as long as it pleasured you. 

“So pretty baby… so so pretty… so good…” he mumbled between kisses he left over your chest. “Can I suck your tits?” he asked.

You moaned at the very thought, quickly lifting your shirt, not wearing a bra under your pj’s. 

Vinnie attached his lips to your chest, kissing and sucking over your nipples. He never stopped moving your hips and you felt the heat in your lower belly start to spread. Your legs started to shake, unable to hold you up. Vinnie held your waist to keep you up while his other hand kept grinding you into him through your orgasm. When you slumped against him trembling and twitching he relaxed his hold on you and stopped grinding into you. He placed a few soft kisses on your cheek as he held your face in his hands. 

“You look really pretty when you cum.” he smiled at you.

You covered your face, for some reason you felt embarrassed.

Vinnie laughed at your shy antics, “And you feel so soft, every part of you.” he said, trailing his hand to your breast before giving it a slight squeeze making you let out a squeak.  

“Did you feel good? Like everything we did?” he said, checking in with you.

You nodded, “Yes.”

Vinnie kissed your cheek once more before gripping the back of your thighs and carrying you to his bedroom. He set you down on the bed. Admiring you as he looked down at you. “Wanna cuddle?” he asked.

You nodded, crawling under the blankets. Vinnie smiled hopping in with you. He pulled you close so your head was resting on his broad chest, his hand tangled in your hair as he massaged your scalp. His free hand rested on your waist to keep you close. 

Right on the verge of sleep, completely vulnerable you let it slip. “I love you.” you said barely above a whisper.

Vinnie hardly heard you over the TV but his eyes snapped down to look at you. Your face was so peaceful, your breaths even and relaxed. “I love you.” Vinnie whispered before kissing the top of your head. He settled in letting himself slip away as well, enjoying the feeling of you next to him as he drifted off.

--------------------------------------

Naboo's Note:

this man has me in a chokehold unfortunately - enjoy cookies <3 XOXOXOXOXOOXOXXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[leiawritesstories]

over my heart

@throneofglassmicrofics August prompt: "Acceptance"

word count: 700

warnings: discussions of grief, tw: tattoo needles

*monty python narrator voice* and now for something completely different...enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Except for the consultation, neither of them had spoken. Instead, the steady low thrum of the tattoo needle's buzzing filled the cool, dry air, covering the background hum of the shop's air conditioning. The sign in the window had been flipped to "CLOSED" hours ago, but after business hours was the only time Rowan had wanted to come in for his appointment.

It was easier if there was no one else around.

Over the phone, the tattoo artist had initially hesitated, but Rowan was a close friend and she understood his need to be alone. They had traded emails with her initial sketches based on his descriptions of what he wanted, and she'd finally refined the design to fit his vision and agreed to have him come in that quiet Thursday night. Although her shop faced one of the main streets of downtown Orynth, it was a few blocks away from the popular cluster of bars and late-night shops, so there were typically very few people who walked past the shop after dark.

His eyes were closed, and he breathed rhythmically but not too deeply as she worked, bent over his torso. It would be best if you didn't inhale too deeply, since the tattoo will be on your ribs, she'd explained. Her black-gloved hands were steady, and her bright blue eyes were focused sharply on the path of her tattoo needle as it traced precise lines into her client's skin. He'd barely moved since they finished the consultation and she prompted him to get comfortable for the tattoo, and she would have worried that he'd passed out if she didn't know Rowan Whitethorn better than that.

The man could be as impassive as granite when he wanted to be, and now was clearly one of those times. She couldn't blame him---many of her clients came to her for deeply emotional tattoos, and it had taken all of her restraint not to sob when Rowan had first reached out about this particular tattoo. After so many months of watching him draw further and further into himself, of wishing she or anyone else could reach out and pull him from the depths of his anger, his pleas, his bargaining, and his soul-cracking sorrow, it was a massive breath of relief when he'd asked her to ink him.

Lyria had cast her light over the bleakness of Rowan's past, and when that light blinked out, Aelin was afraid Rowan would never see brightness again.

Beneath her buzzing needle, his heart beat steadily, thudding a gentle counterpoint to the mechanical hum of her work. The strokes of the Old Terrasenian characters unfolded under her skilled hands, an epitaph sketched over Rowan's heart, as he'd requested. I need to carry her as close to me as possible; can you place the piece over my heart? The ink that scrolled over Aelin's own heart hummed, as if in reply, a finely spun thread of soul-deep understanding that connected her to him in his grief. She knew what it was like to lose someone who held the keys to her heart. If Rowan needed a tattoo to help him navigate the twisting path of loss (as she did), she considered it her honor to give him that piece of support.

After she set aside her tools, wiped antiseptic solution over Rowan's fresh tattoo, and carefully covered it in clear film, Aelin discarded her gloves and handed Rowan a small mirror. He angled it down so he could see the Old Terrasenian script over his heart, and the suggestion of a smile tugged at one corner of his lips as he read the words she's so carefully rendered.

Lyria, beloved light of my heart

Rowan handed Aelin the mirror and traced a fingertip lightly over the clear film protecting the fresh tattoo. Slowly, he sat up and reached for his shirt, pulling the worn cotton over his head with care. As he stood to leave, he met her eyes, and something that could have been understanding passed between them. His lips moved, the words so soft that she didn't properly hear them until after he'd left the shop and closed the bell-laden door behind him.

"Thank you."

~~~

TAGS:

@live-the-fangirl-life

@superspiritfestival

@thegreyj

@wordsafterhours

@elentiyawhitethorn

@mariaofdoranelle

@rowanaelinn

@house-of-galathynius

@tomtenadia

@julemmaes

@swankii-art-teacher

@charlizeed

@booknerdproblems

@earthtolinds

@goddess-aelin

@sweet-but-stormy

@clea-nightingale

@autumnbabylon

@llyncooljones

@silentquartz

@renxzs

@anarchiii

@fauna-flora11

[flyingcircusbracket]

clips and episode titles below!

Argument Clinic - S3E3: The Money Programme

2. Biggles Dictates a Letter - S3E7: Salad Days (not sure why this video won't embed - sorry!)

3. Come Back to My Place - S1E13: Intermission

(mod note: the clip shown above is from the TV show, but if you'd like a re-recorded, extremely HD clip that was made for And Now for Something Completely Different, because it's positively iconic, here it is. but for voting purposes, the original clip must be considered.)

4. Dirty Hungarian Phrasebook - S2E12: Spam

5. Hermits - S1E8: Full Frontal Nudity

6. Light Entertainment Awards - S3E13: Grandstand

7. Poets - S2E4: The Buzz Aldrin Show

8. Silly Voices at the Police Station - S1E12: The Naked Ant

[whitegoldtower]

My list of bg3 takes

(Gods fuck I’m sorry in advance ok)

🕸️ Minthara is the best companion.

🕸️ Act 1 Astarion makes me feel unsafe. If I suddenly found myself in Faerûn, I’d be very inclined to avoid him in camp, and I’d probably snap at him for purring at me / giving insincere compliments. Realistically, I wouldn’t find it seductive; I’d find it creepy, no matter how pretty he is.

🕸️ True Soul Nere’s voice is hot and nobody can change my mind about it. I wish we could have him as a Sorcerer companion. I’d snatch him up so damn fast, sprinting through act 1 to get to him.

🕸️ The fact that I’d be less afraid of True Soul Nere than Act 1 Astarion is saying something. When you tell Astarion that he’s overstepped a boundary (“You’re too close”), the way he responds (mockingly and pretty aggressively before telling you to ‘sleep well’ slightly sinisterly) would literally make me black out and have a durge moment.

🕸️ I personally would prefer it if Scratch was a cat.

🕸️ I actually enjoy talking to Gale and Wyll.

🕸️ It’s not hard to just not ask Shadowheart so many damn questions and respect her privacy

🕸️ I want the toad teapot

🕸️ Ketheric’s the coolest of the trio.

🕸️ Auntie Ethel and Raphael are the best villains in the game.

🕸️ I would trust Minthara with my drink.

🕸️ I actually love the goblins and hate having to kill them all. Wish we could have had Sazza and Fezzerk as companions.

🕸️ Why is it that everyone seems to have a problem with Nere’s voice and yet completely ignores the fucking owlbear cub’s voice. Now that’s a voice that almost makes me press the mute button.

🕸️ Let me have those fucking spiders in my camp ffs. Give me the two in the Goblin camp. The pretty ones in Grymforge. The prettiest one in the shadowcursed lands with the cute face (Kar’niss).

🕸️ The mouldy/gone off shit everywhere in game makes my stomach churn. Someone please make a mod that removes it.

🕸️ I wish there would have been more of the Underdark to explore.

🕸️ I absolutely cannot bring myself to take the moonlantern off Kar’niss and hearing him sob as you fight him on top of Moonrise genuinely upsets me.

🕸️ Gerringothe Thorm is such a fucking icon

🕸️ Malus Thorm is the moment

🕸️ I feel sick during the scene with Thisobald because his stomach reminds me of that one monty python sketch “it’s wafer thin!” 🫣🤢🤢

🕸️ if you choose to play a human in a fantasy game, you scare me. DNI.

🕸️ I would, as a matter of fact, sleep with every drow in the game.

🕸️ there is a character with my deadname but spelled a little differently, so I purposefully go out of my way to make that character’s life hell, and that’s my red flag. Like how dare you make my eyes witness those letters in that order on my screen. You will pay dearly.

[mir-iamwilde]

Talk Dirty to Me || DAMIDGE

TAGGING: @dannyssylvester, @mir-iamwilde

LOCATION: Indigo Sounds.

TIMEFRAME: 10/12, early evening.

WARNINGS: nsfw, really just a lot of dirty talk, probably don't read it, they're sickos.

NOTES: Midge tries her best to make Danny feel better.

Danny Sylvester

Somehow, this wasn't the worst day in his life ever. But it still fucking sucked. Cherry on the top of a shitty day. Trying not to completely lose his shit, Danny sat off to the side watching the other people in the recording studio with him. This wasn't good. But trying to shake off some of his sour mood, he turned to look at Midge who sat nearby. "Hey." He started in a soft voice. "You okay?"

Midge Wilde

Was she expecting to get ushered into a building while on her way to get coffee today? No, not quite. But at least there were some familiar faces around. When she heard Danny speak, she looked over, a surprised smile forming on her lips at what seemed like genuine concern. "I'm okay." She assured him, "Although I did have a date last night and now I'll probably never know if the dude was planning to all me back, but no big deal." She teased, sliding next to him and nudging him with her shoulder. "You okay?"

Danny Sylvester

Once Midge assured him that he was okay, Danny felt some of the tension leave his body. Only some though. "Cool." Then he gave her a smile at her words. "Wow really? Was it a good night, I bet it was pretty wild." He chuckled a ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah... I think he probably would have." Bringing his knees up to his chin, he gave a small shrug. "Loaded question." Was he okay? Absolutely not. He needed to check on his siblings, and it was Sage's birthday tomorrow. "It's fine."

Midge Wilde

"It was alright, dude had potential with a few training sessions with me." She teased again, hoping in some way to lighten the mood. Midge nodded when he said it was a loaded question, not really great that the comforting thing but hoping she could help somehow. "Fine? Is that like in The Princess Bride when the guy get's his arm cut off and then he's all 'tis a scratch!'?" 

Danny Sylvester

"Training sessions?" He asked, his tone teasing yet curious. "Oh he's definitely calling you back." There was still a smile on his face but it didn't reach it eyes, clearly forced. Shaking his head he rolled his eyes slightly. "That's Monty Python's Holy Grail." He explained. "But yeah, it's kinda like that I guess." Danny turned away and looked down at the ground. "I just need to be out of here."

Midge Wilde

“Yeah, you know, sometimes you just need a little help from an expert to get on top of your game.” She frowned slightly, wondering what was bothering him so much. Sure, it could just be the situation but it seemed like there was something bugging Danny below the surface. “Aren’t they the same thing?” She asked, not really remembering one having much standout from the other in her mind. “Well, I can’t help with the getting out of here part, but despite being great in bed, I also happen to be a fantastic listener and a world class secret keeper, so if you want to dress that flesh wound, I’m happy to help.”

Danny Sylvester

Danny gave Midge a wicked grin in response. "I'd love to get on top of something for sure." But then his face turned back sullen again, clearly feeling sorry for himself. He shook his head at her. "Nah, very different. Princess Bride is better too." Danny considered Midge's words carefully and gave her a grateful smile. "You are good in bed I can't deny that. But thanks. It's a long story though so I don't think I'll bother you with it." It might have been good to get everything off his chest with someone different. And he could trust Midge right?

Midge Wilde

She let out a laugh that actually felt pretty genuine when he spoke, even if it faded quickly. "Well, I guess when we get out of here I'll have to rewatch them and refresh my memory." She nodded when he said it was a long story, "Phew, yeah. I appreciate you sparing me, I just have so much to do today, I never seem to have a spare minute anyways."

Danny Sylvester

"We can watch them together sometime if you want." Danny shrugged, not something he'd normally suggest with a girl, but he liked Midge. He just nodded at her. "It's fine, don't really feel like talking about it anyway." Then he turned to look at her with a frown. "So much to do? Like what? Babe we are stuck in here and not leaving any time soon."

Midge Wilde

"I would actually love that, you seem like the kind of dude who wouldn't try to explain all the dumb jokes to me." Midge nodded when he said he didn't want to talk about it, knowing well enough when to drop something. She laughed and shook her head, "That was sarcasm, guess my sense of humor is a little too dry for some people." She bit her lip thinking for a second, "Anything I can do to take your mind off your big worries?"

Danny Sylvester

Danny shook his head and screwed his nose up. "No I hate those kinds of people, they're the worst." As Midge explained herself, he just smiled sheepishly and shrugged. "Sorry I didn't get that. Guess I've got a lot on my mind." But then he chuckled and slid a little closer. "I'm sure we can both think of something we can do together." A sly grin on his face.

Midge Wilde

She felt bad for him, she had a lot on her mind as well, but he seemed like he was being dragged down by something deeper than all of this. “It’s cool, sometimes I need to remember not everything is a joke, I can really put a dick in my mouth sometimes, or whatever that saying is.” She grinned, hoping her joke was more clear this time. Midge didnt understand what was with Danny but he had some kind of affect on her, and his grin gave caused butterflies in her stomach. No, not in her stomach, about 6 inches lower than that. “Maybe we should play a little game. Pretend it’s not a lockdown, it’s the end of the world. We’re stuck here, tell me all the things you want to do to me.” Midge was nothing if not forward, but even this was a little over the line for her usually, but she figured if there was one way she knew to perk Danny up, literally, sex, or at least talking about it was probably it.

Danny Sylvester

He laughed louder this time and his grin at Midge got even bigger. "I don't know if thats right, but you can have a dick in your mouth if you'd like." And he simply shrugged in response. She was truly something else, and Danny really liked that and liked her. How forward she was just turned him on, and it was intoxicating. He sat right next to her now, his hand resting on her knee as he looked into her eyes. "I think the list of things I don't want to do would be shorter." Danny joked, his charming grin still on his face. "But I would definitely fuck you on every surface there is in here. Especially a piano, that would be hot. In every hole too. And then I'd eat you out until your legs give out. Need me to say any more?"

Midge Wilde

It wasn’t often that Midge got flustered, really never. Other than when she was in the presence of her father and that was pure fear, so entirely different. And there was not an ounce of fear in her when it came to Danny, it was all adrenaline and wanting. As flustered as she was though, she kept her face composed, and reached her hand down to his that rested on her knee and slid it higher up her thigh, “And when my legs are giving out and I’m ready to come are you gonna make me ask for it? Maybe hold me down so I can’t even touch myself, make me beg for it before I can have it?” She said, her voice quieter now as she practically whispered in his ear, her own hand finding its way under his shirt, her fingers trailing along the edge of his boxers. “I’ve always thought it would be hot to be tied and up teased for hours.”

Danny Sylvester

She moved his hand higher and his grin got even bigger if that was possible. "Of course I'm going to make you beg, only good girls get to come and you need to prove that you're a good girl." Her free hand was roaming all over his body now and his breath hitched as it moved lower, so close to where he wanted it. It was taking every bit of him to not just take her there and then. "If that's what you want then that's what we'll do. It's the end of the world after all, might as well make it worth it and live out any fantasy you want." His lips were so close to hers, barely brushing against them.

Midge Wilde

She grinned right back when he said they should live out all her fantasies, something telling her that he would happily do just that, end of the world or not. He was so close to her that she could feel his breath against her lips. Midge leaned in, closing the gap between them for a brief second before pulling away. "Well, I suppose that took your mind off things for a bit, yeah?" She said, her grin growing slightly teasing as she stood from her spot, "I should go see if Addy ever found that spider or whatever."

Danny Sylvester

As she moved in, Danny's eyes closed and he readied himself for a kiss, but one didn't come. His eyes snapped open and he frowned as he saw her pulling away. But there was that twinkle in her eye and the teasing grin and he rolled his eyes but grinned back. Fine, if that's how she wanted to play it. He could tease her too. "Oh yeah I feel loads better now that I've got the image in my head of me fucking you while you're all tied up and nothing you can do about it." He stood up too and nodded. "Yeah let's try and find Eileen's spider."

[rolandrockover]

Read On Me This Way

or: Acquired Half-knowledge With Read My Body and How to Get Rid of the Amount of Misinformation In It

The practice of pulling over Read My Body (1989) is a common practice, even more a compulsory exercise, among hardcore Kiss fans, to which I must also guiltily admit to belonging. But I'm not actually that guilty, because I have always conscientiously abstained from this kind of song bullying. So, I'm maybe not quite as hardcore as some others, but still enough to make me surrender to the inevitable atonement, and do what I have to do. And here I am Read My Body, and I take you as you are.

To this end, let's briefly address the much-heralded but also somewhat one-dimensional claim that Read My Body is little more than a Def Leppard Pour Some Sugar on Me (1987) rip-off. I don't want to accuse anyone of lying for that, but no one should expect a medal for the best ears on earth either.

So what exactly connects Read My Body with Pour Some Sugar on Me?

First of all, let's take Kiss' chorus, which is probably the most obvious overlap in this common consideration, because similarity to Def Leppard is clearly there, and knowing Paul, this will definitely not be a coincidence. And perhaps there is the drum rhythm with this rock it beat, which was a must for minimalist rock anthems of this period of rock music anyway.

And now, let's take a look at the rest, beginning with the vocals, or... the rap, or whatever you like to call it. Joe Elliot, in my estimation, tends very much in the direction of Freddie Mercury in We Will Rock You (1977), only a little more macho and perhaps more humorous. And every now and then his voice rhythm and tempo vary in order to remain original, because We Will Rock You only lasts half as long as Sugar.

Paul Stanley, on the other hand, is clearly trying to rap. How well he succeeded in this is a moot point, and what he does there has only the slightest resemblance to Joe Elliot, let alone Freddie Mercury. Unless Queen at that time already joined the ranks of rappers, but you never know, you know?

What Steve Clark of Def Leppard elicits from the production is straightforward, pure rock; riffs on super steroids, produced at the absolute height of 80s Zeitgeist, underpinned by those massive cyber drums, thanks to Mutt Lange.

The riffs do have a similarity, but what Bruce Kulick, on the other hand, knows how to play consciously is more rhythmic, and in my book can be described as quite agile and, above all, smooth, and thus clearly stands out from Pour Some Sugar on Me in pretty much every respect on this level as well. That certainly doesn't make Read My Body a better song, oh no, just, to quote the Monty Python's, something completely different.

One might well feel encouraged to ask where the ding-dong did Kiss get the rap and the rhythm from? And to that I can only concede, somehow Bruce Kulick's guitar playing makes me think of Joe Perry, and believe it or not, that also brings us to the rap.

Once again Kiss steal it like an inconspicuous shadow, this time only from Aerosmith and Run DMC's Walk This Way. And that's not as clumsy as one might think, just listen to it, exactly that has always been their strength.

Since nobody could hold a candle to Mutt Lang and Def Leppard in terms of hits and production back then anyway, and Aerosmith had breathed new life into themselves by synthesizing Walk This Way into the 80's and by the way opened up to MTV, Kiss simply dared to do the little balancing act and grabbed hold of the most suitable of both worlds with their toes. Nothing more, but also nothing less.

The first two, of course, stayed ahead and clearly formed an intense pop-cultural gravitational point, which unfortunately did not pull Kiss along as they had probably hoped.

So, if those fans have to keep harping on about it, they should at least do it properly. Shouldn't they?

Thank you very much in advance, gentlemen.

Read My Body (1989)

Pour Some Sugar on Me (1987)

Walk This Way (1986)

We Will Rock You (1977)

If you are interested in listening to a real Pour Some Sugar on Me rip-off, here a little but very special treat. Hangin' Tough (1988) by the New Kids on the Block. But beware, they also rip off I Love It Loud quite incidentally and (almost) unnoticed!

Hangin' Tough (1988)

[fireflythecinnamonjollyrancher]

sometimes I have to remember that my ability to disassociate from my emotions doesn't mean those emotions weren't real

[cesarescabinet]

Toshiro Mifune and Akira Kurosawa during the filming of Yojimbo (1961)

[revacholianpizzaagenda]

Püha ja õudne lõhn (Sacred and Terrible Air) chapters 15+16 summary

Chapters index - ask away for any clarification or further details!

15. MOULD

The chapter of the end times. We follow the last days of various secondary characters throughout the six years that go from the beginning of the end – the initial pale onslaught, the nuke – to global entroponetic collapse in 78. It’s a suspended atmosphere. Oblivion and annihilation are almost met with relief. Some, like Anita, come into their own in the end days, finding unexpected wellsprings of inner strength. Gessle’s subversive documentary on Hirst finds a public of fascists missing the nuance. Khan calls his mother for the last time one month after reaching Graad, saying goodbye. He will not return. Katla joins Graad in the war against Mesque; the struggle is futile, but as satire would have it, not even losing a war can take the social democracy out of Vaasa. They even become the first and last city in history to eliminate light pollution. As the world ends, they look at the stars.

The war entwines with the advance of the pale. Its arrival is heralded by fruit going mouldy.

As Ann-Margret Lund dissolves at last, she leaves no memories in the pale, there is no past for her to return to. Katla sinks into the pale.

16. ENTROPONAUT

(Monty Python voice) and now for something completely different. Present (72), Samara, collapsed Nad-Umai region. Zigi, now a washed-out husk of a man, traverses the desolate grey expanses of the near pale. But he is not alone…

21 years ago, Vaasa. In a fit of rebellion, as one does to change the world, a drunk Zigi wrecks a bus stop, fisticuffs a trash bin and throws a brick at the window of the fanciest picket fence house in the suburb: the Lund house. The girls’ father rushes out to punish the vandal and engages him in a long pursuit which, after some slapstick detours, ends with Zigi climbing to the safety of a garage roof. Then, too, he was not alone, a shadowy figure was already egging him on from the roof, inciting violence...

Present. Zigi’s past and present companion turns out to be none other than the blurred cytoplasm of Ignus Nilsen. The two have a contentious relationship, with the apocalyptic shrike now supporting, now inspiring, now suicide-baiting his ward. Zigi is trying to flee from the world. This pains Nilsen, who, despite everything, loves the world deeply. Their bickering takes on the ideological tones of a confrontation between communism and nihilism, a central tension of the book. At one point, Nilsen’s impassionate defense of communism, in its most fundamental aspect of belief in your fellow human, appears to make the pale retreat from their spot. This makes Zigi panic. The pale rolls back. Nilsen accuses the Lund girls of having been bourgeois, all girls are bourgeois, but Zigi shuts him up: they weren’t. He does not know what they were thinking, but it was something else.

Zigi threatens to make Ignus disappear if he won’t reveal something from his erstwhile, bloody retreat to Samara: why on earth did he take the Harnankur model with him? But Nilsen admits that all he says – all the tales of Mazov and his gentle soul, of the amphetamines-fueled birth of Samara SRV – can’t reach any further than what Zigi already knows...

[laughingpinecone]

I appreciate several things Texhnolyze is saying, but even when it's not shuffling around its cast for no particular reason, its storytelling approach is best summarized as (Monty Python voice) "and now for something completely different" and that's not. good.

[disneytva]

Nic Smal and Lucy Heavens Talk About Their Path From Cape Town To Disney’s First South African Creators.

South African creators and executive producers, Lucy Heavens and Nic Smal are behind Disney Television Animation’s upcoming animated buddy-comedy, Kiff, which follows an optimistic squirrel whose best intentions often lead to complete chaos, and her best friend, a sweet and mellow bunny, and was inspired by the people and places the creators experienced growing up in Cape Town. 

They gave some details for the series such as that the show uses a hybrid Toon Boom Harmony and hand-drawn animation

Animation Magazine had a chance to speak with this talented duo during a recent interview:

Can you tell us a little bit about the development history of your new show?

Lucy Heavens: We both always dreamed of having our own show, but it also seemed kind of outlandish and impossible for such a thing to happen to a pair of self-taught South Africans. It wasn’t that long ago that we just had no idea how to pitch a show — to who, where? It was always something reserved for people far away, over there in the U.S.A. But when we met, we were both so desperate for a creative outlet, that working on the idea was wonderful whether it got picked up for development or not. It was its own reward.

Nic Smal: When the series was optioned by Disney (only five short months after we created it) no one was more surprised than us! Development can always be a long road, so we really appreciated the fact that we each had a co-creator to walk that road with, and we poured ourselves into a pilot animatic and animation test. It has been, and continues to be so, so fun! Throughout the process we have found a very collaborative way to work, and the voice of the show really comes alive when we are working together. We have always enjoyed feeding into each other’s primary disciplines in a really productive way. Lucy is a writer who’s an art person.

Lucy: And Nic is an artist (and comedian and musician!) who’s really great at story

When did you two begin working together?

Nic: We met at an animation studio in Cape Town in 2017 and quickly realized we spoke the same comedy language. We have quite different sensibilities, but a very similar sense of humor. There aren’t really any opportunities to work on this kind of comedy in South Africa (as yet!), so we just decided to create a series that would be the most free, fun world for us to sink our teeth into in terms of story and comedy — and just enjoy that process.

What was the inspiration for the show?

Lucy: We really wanted to create a world and a tone that was very free to tell all kinds of stories about being a human; friendships, family, society, frustrations, joys! Ultimately we wanted it to be extremely universal and relatable, filled with rich, flawed characters where we can explore human nature (with talking animals, obviously)! So really the inspiration was: What’s the most perfect vehicle for us to tell endless, and (hopefully) very funny stories? Kiff is the result.

Where is the animation being produced and how many people are working on it?

Nic: Titmouse is the wonderful and amazing studio producing the show.

Lucy: We have a number of team members in both L.A. and New York

Which animation tools are being used by the studio?

Nic: Toon Boom, Storyboard Pro etc. The show uses a hybrid Toon Boom Harmony and hand-drawn animation style, so we can be efficient but also have those sublime, unique moments by pushing key poses and expressions.

Tell us what you love about this show!

Lucy: Every aspect of the show is a joy and a pleasure. Visually, we have poured our love of nature and the natural world surrounding Cape Town into the geography and design. Tonally, it’s a very free space for all kinds of stories to be told. Musically, it is so fun to write songs and play with every musical genre imaginable, and in a way that doesn’t speak down to kids (we write the songs together but Nic is the really accomplished musician). And of course our characters are hilarious to us. We sort of see them as different parts of the human psyche; the lust for life, the sensitive and vulnerable parts of ourselves, the self-centered, ego-driven parts of ourselves — they are all represented, and intersect in interesting ways.

What is your biggest challenge right now?

Nic: Working across three time zones isn’t the most sustainable way to work as showrunners. We’re based in Cape Town and production is happening between L.A. and New York. It is such a collaborative medium; there aren’t enough meeting hours in the day.

What is your take on the global animation scene in 2021?

Lucy: We’ve never been in a more rad time for animation; important, real, existential, funny, rich and beautiful shows for all ages are coming out. There also seems to be a breakdown of the more rigid genres and age groups that you had to target previously, and an understanding that the right audience will be able to find your show on streaming platforms.

Nic: It’s also a time where big broadcasters are taking risks on outsiders like ourselves — thank goodness (and Disney) for that.

Who are your biggest animation heroes/influences?

Lucy: We’re millennials, so we communicate solely via Simpsons references. But we’re also children of 1990s Disney films,  TV and (not animation but) Monty Python as well.

What kind of advice can you offer animation newbies who dream about creating their own show?

Nic: Persistence is the lesson of our lives. Don’t wait for other people to create opportunities for you — just make, create, do!

Lucy: Development is a long road, so make sure you’re making a show that you really want to watch.

Kiff is slated to premiere on Disney Channel in 2023.

.

[emotionalsupporthufflepuff]

Dramione — prompt: flowers

MONTY PYTHON VOICE: now for something completely different! grandparents! Dramione

The cold of the early morning settled into his joints. There had been a time where getting up at the hour had repulsed him to the core, but now he found himself wide awake at an hour reserved only for old people and toddlers, though he'd never admit to fitting into the latter category. 

Leo was, of course, chattering away and shoveling brightly colored breakfast cereal into his face at top speed. 

"Where are we going to so early anyway, Grandad?" 

"Florist. I want to surprise your grandmother when she wakes up." Draco responded, finishing off his tea and morning scowl at the Prophet. 

"Could have them delivered. Nana says you need your glasses when we go out!" 

Draco pointedly stuffed them into his pocket.  "The shop is Muggle, they won't deliver here. Besides, I want to see them for myself. "  

They walked to the end of the Manor's property, Leo chatting all the while in a stream of consciousness.  Draco scooped the flailing tot up to Apparate them to his protest. 

"I'm old enough to side allonngg." 

"No. You'll splinch yourself." 

"Maybe they'll replace half of me with a robot!" 

They appeared silently in the alley of a sleepy village.  Draco checked both sides before emerging from the shadow, as somethings were just ingrained into a soul after so much time.  

The florist was open, and after carefully inspecting several bouquets and Leo accidentally destroying 3 of them, they paid and left before the rambunctious child could do any more damage. 

In the gardens of the manor, Leo finally fell quiet, calmed by the serenity of the greenery. 

"I want to give her one."  Draco picked out one flower for him.   As the gazebo came into sight, the familiar bushy hair, escaping a braid from the night before caught his eye. A giant tome and a teacup floated next to her as she marked her place to greet them. 

Leo ran up first, waving the flower in her face but Hermione returning all the enthusiasm in kind. Then to Draco and the rest of the flowers. 

"Hhmmm...it's not our anniversary, it's not a birthday…" she touched the flowers thoughtfully. "Okay, I admit it, I forgot, what's today?" 

"Oh how they fall, Granger actually admitting defeat. First date." He smirked as she swatted him on the arm. "I've never forgotten it for a moment, even after all this time. 

[kent-parsons-cowlick]

could you do nurseychow in flower crowns? 💖

can I EVER! Here’s a li’l somethin’ somethin’ from my sketchbook

My notes on the meanings of the flowers used are below the cut!

(Every time I get a prompt, an angel gets its wings)

lol if you can read my handwriting

Nursey’s crown is mostly cool colors with the exception of the sunflower (Nursey loves sunflowers) 

Chowder’s crown is mostly warm colors with the exception of larkspur

Maybe someday I’ll do a full-color version of this ^-^

[actualbird]

nobody (okay, well, 2 people DID ask, but it’s too late to change the title of this essay series now) asked but here are three main humor techniques i apply a lot in my fanfiction | a 2k word long post where i talk humor theory at you for entirely too long

I love humor. A good 75% of my personality is based primarily on whether or not it would be funny and thus, the study and application of comedy is something of a very big huge large interest of mine. I love watching standup comedy, I love telling jokes, but most of all, I love literature that makes me laugh. 

I write humor, and I put a lot of thought into it, and here, I will do the least funny thing ever: I will over-explain my jokes.

Before we do that, we must set some ground rules first. What is humor? Well, in Humor: Its Origin and Development, Paul McGhee contends that no single theory could encapsulate the entirety of humor. Additionally, according to McGhee, humor does not physically exist. It is, instead, a perception brought about by certain scenarios with certain characteristics. What we can take away from here is that first, humor is vast, and there are many ways to both explain it and achieve it, and second, that humor is something caused by certain other things. 

I do not claim to be an expert in humor, just an enthusiast, so what I will not be giving a cheat code to humorous writing. I will, instead, share three techniques that I frequently use and explain how they work.

The three techniques are the following:

INCONGRUENCY: Things that don’t fit.

SLAPSTICK: I hope that doesn’t happen to me.

CHEKOV’S GAG: If the gun is there, it better be funny.

My examples for each of these techniques will come from various sources of media. My examples of my own writing will all be coming from the most recent fanfic I have written, my Polygon Cyberpunk Red high school au “teenagers scare the living shit out of me.” Examples will sometimes have overlap in the technique they utilize, but I’ll try my best to keep everything clear on what exactly I’m trying to explain.

Without further ado, let’s jump right into it!

INCONGRUENCY: Things that don’t fit.

Göran Nerhardt, in McGhee’s book, states that “Humor is seen as a consequence of the discrepancy between two mental representations, one of which is an expectation and the other is some idea or percept.” Nerhardt’s definition of humor is one that relies on incongruity: wherein there is an element that is not in accordance with the other elements. An incongruous element is one that is not the expectation, and in this subversion of expectation, humor is achieved. 

In simpler terms, a congruent situation would be “A man walks into a bar and orders a beer.” An incongruent situation would “A man walks into a bar. ‘Ow!’ He says.” 

In the first example, everything is as expected, and in the second, the word “bar” has the characteristic of being a homophone, a word with different definitions. The second example takes advantage of the other definition of the word “bar”, that is to say a metal tube object, and thus the reaction of the man. 

Incongruency plays on the unexpected, the out of place, and the odd. This technique in particular I learned from writers like Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett. They use incongruence, they use it A LOT but what I want to talk about is, first, its use as a descriptor. 

“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.” -Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“In a distant forest a wolf howled, felt embarrassed when no one joined in, and stopped.” -Terry Pratchett, The Light Fantastic

Description is a fertile ground for humor. You have a thing, there are expectations to how that thing will appear or act, and then you describe it in a way that’s unexpected. I pull this trick off in so many fics, but here is an example from chapter 4 of the high school au.

Mr. Hypo sits at the desk in front of the classroom, staring all three of them down. Vang0, Dasha, and Burger are seated in the stupid circle again, looking at Robbie as it powers up like a man with gout.

Incongruency here is Robbie, the animatronic. Expectation is that it will be described in a robot like manner. Reality is that I describe it having the same condition that occasionally ails my nearly 50 year old father. 

Aside from description, incongruence is also something I play around with in the events of situations themselves. The most clear example I can give is this scene, from chapter 6, is this:

Burger picks up the closest thing.

That thing happens to be Peter.

“Peter!” Burger looks at Peter in the eye as Edmundton picks up a chair and starts menacingly walking towards Burger. He says, very quickly “Do you consent to be used as a self defense projectile!?”

Peter, pigeonly, nods.

“Thank youuuuuuuu!” Burger yells as he throws Peter at Edmundton’s face.

The context of this scene is that Burger has just entered active combat. Combat is serious. Combat is deadly. Combat is hitting and getting hurt. So what’s something unexpected you can do in this situation to make it funny? Have Burger ask a pigeon if it’s alright with being thrown at an enemy, and then make Burger actually throw the pigeon at the enemy. 

Incongruence is something that is present in a lot of humor situations and it’s very, very fun to play around with. Messing around with incongruence makes you think about what is expected in writing and forces you to think outside of the box in a manner that will elicit laughter.

Let’s move on to our next topic now!

SLAPSTICK: I hope that doesn’t happen to me.

Kevin Casper in his article I’m so glad you’re fake! describes slapstick comedy as a physical type of humor wherein actions are done in an excessive, ridiculous, and sometimes violent manner. Slapstick is Mr. Bean exploding a can of paint to paint his apartment. Slapstick is Courage the Cowardly Dog’s eyes popping out of his sockets when he sees something scary. Slapstick is the ending of Polygon’s video on Slapstick and Doom Eternal (a very good video about slapstick and horror violence) where Pat Gill gets hit in the face with a tube of paper. 

The excessiveness of slapstick creates a non-reality for viewers to enjoy in safety. It is a type of humor that revels in the suspension of reality, but more than that, it is a type of humor that you particularly gain enjoyment from because of the fact that it’s not happening to YOU.

Now, I use slapstick comedy sometimes, but I deviate from excessiveness and instead lean more into that last thing I said. I write situations that are funny and that you also don’t want to ever happen to you as a person. One example of “fuck, that’s hilarious, but I hope it never happens to me” is the following scene from Spiderman: Into The Spider Verse, where Miles Morales, invisible, has to find information on Doctor Octavia’s computer. When he accesses the computer, he is met with this.

You don’t want this to happen to you. But damn is it hilarious that it’s happening to somebody else.

When I am creating scenes that I want to be funny, I think about whether or not it would be funnier if I made it excruciating for the characters involved. So excruciating that you really, really, wouldn’t want to be in that situation. An example of this technique in play is from chapter 4 of the high school au, where the gang are in a room they shouldn’t be in, somebody is about to come in and stop them, and they are all at the mercy of a program slowly, slowly uploading.

 “Hey!” The somebody outside says, jangling the doorknob more violently. “Club time is over, nobody should be in this room!”

“Vang0, how long until the program is done?” Dasha hisses.

“43% Uploaded,” Vang0 says, panicked.

“Hurry.”

“I can’t make technology be faster.”

“Who’s in there!” The person outside yells.

“Should I answer?” Burger asks.

“Do not answer.” Dasha says.

Burger nods. “I’m gonna answer.”

“BURGER—”

“WE’RE JUST A COUPLE OF NOT FRIENDS. JUST LOOKING AROUND.”

“Who are you!” The person outside yells.

“Do not answer, Burger,” Dasha says, sounding like this conversation is actively shaving years off of her lifespan.

“But he’s asking,” Burger looks at Dasha then at the door then at Dasha again, looking very nervous.

“Just lie then,” Dasha tells Burger.

“Gotcha,” Burger nods, determined, and turns to the door to yell. “I’M NOT BURGER CHAINZ.”

“Oh my god,” Dasha thunks her head onto Vang0’s shoulder. “Is it done loading, yet?”

“98% Uploaded,” Vang0 says, feeling his blood pressure in a way he’s never felt before.

I make this situation worse for the characters by making Burger completely fail at being stealthy. As one reader told me about this chapter “I love Burger, but if I were in that room, I would strangle him.” Exactly! It’s not a situation you’d ever want to be in! 

But the characters are in it and you get to enjoy their suffering from a safe vantage point as a reader. 

Slapstick comedy is all about making situations outrageous and ridiculous and something readers wouldn’t want to legitimately experience. It’s about tapping into your audience’s mind and wondering what they want to see but not want to go through.

And last but not least!

CHEKOV’S GAG: If the gun is there, it better be funny

The principle of Chekov’s Gun is a principle that emphasizes that objects in a story should have a use. According to Bill in Chekhov: The Silent Voice of Freedom, Chekov says “If you say in the first chapter that there is a rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must go off. If it's not going to be fired, it shouldn't be hanging there.” 

Chekov’s Gag is that same rule, but instead of the gun going off, the gun better be fucking hilarious at some point. 

The first example I can think of is from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. In the beginning of the movie, King Arthur stops by a castle and asks the guards to tell their master that he is here. This exchange happens:

Now, this, on its own, is already hilarious. It plays on incongruence (guards being very enthusiastic about bird’s holding coconuts and the logistics of that), slapstick (if you were Arthur and you wanted to have a simple conversation, people suddenly talking about birds and ignoring you is not a situation you want to be in), but what about Chekov’s Gag?

To become Chekov’s Gag, this situation must be brought up again in a funny manner later in the movie.

And so it does.

An hour later in the movie, The Knights of Camelot are at the Bridge of Death. There, they have to answer 3 questions correctly. If they do not have an answer, they are shot into a deadly cavern of doom.

King Arthur steps up to answer his 3 questions. Here is what happens:

The African swallow or the European swallow has achieved Chekov’s Gag-age.

Chekov’s Gag is something I’ve only started doing recently, in fanfiction. An example of this in the high school au is that, in the first chapter, I introduce two things. 1) Peter, an overfed pigeon, and 2) Robbie the RoboDog, an animatronic of the school.

Throughout the fic, I don’t forget about Peter or Robbie. I bring them up again and again and I make sure to make their presence not just integral to the winning of the final boss battle in chapter 6, but I make their presence funny.

Chekov’s Gag is a new trick I’ve started doing, and it definitely requires foresight and planning. It makes you think long term but at the same time forces you to think about the things you already have present in your story and make you re-evaluate just how else they could be used. If done correctly, the effect is hilarity, but also deep, deep satisfaction.

So there we have it! Three humor techniques that I use in my fanfiction. Shit that doesn’t make sense, shit you don’t want happening to you, and shit that you saw a while ago which you’ll see again later and when you do, it’ll be awesome.

Thanks for reading!