#... i honestly dont wanna think abt college stuff.

[boycigs]

hhh fucked up.. missed fafsa email and practically missed a ton of chances for scholarships

[arolesbianism]

Thinking abt how much I love oni's writing again... In particular, "a seed is planted" continues to be one of if not my favorite logs because despite the troubling details and implications that come with it, it's the one thing in the entirety of the decaying corpse of gravitas that genuinely leaves us with a grain of hope (a seed if you will) and makes oni as a whole a lot more bitter sweet as while earth may not have survived, the dupes did, and after their horrible origins and the shit that many of them went through, in due time they'll finally get to just live, they're free now, and even if Olivia's sleep is end of a tragedy, the world will keep moving forward with or without those who've been lost

[just-some-random-blogger]

The Science Teacher & The Skeptic

Joel Miller x Science Teacher!Reader

Summary: "who cares about space when there's a fuckin apocalypse going on"

Word Count: 1k+

Warnings: crackfic, fem!reader, headcanons, joel 'im a contractor 🤠' miller, fluff, typos, etc.

A/N: ok this is borne of out me geeking about about the film 'the beautician and the beast' to @sloanexx and she's actually the author im just ghost writing it so if you wanna p2 you're gonna have to take it with her. dont shoot the messenger im blue just for consistency HAHAHH in this Tagging: @multifandom-fangirl4 @pinksirensong @aralezinspace

she can be a teacher at the qz

HOLY SHIT

he meets her bc she teaches ellie ✌🏻

OMG

!!!!!! STOP IM GETTING EXCITED FOR IT NOW

[post chat me] THIS RAT FINNA TALK TO ME ABOUT A FIC SHES EXCITED ABOUT AND NOT WRITE IT COS SHES 'NOT A WRITER' BROS ALREADY A WRITER JUST BASED ON THAT

joel never went to college so he thinks she's like super cool for

knowing shit about space and stuff

but at the start he lowkey hates her bc he thinks she's a snob maybe???

idk

GIRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

GRILL

i do have saur many ideas-

[post chat me] YA DONT FUCKIN SAY 😪🙄🙄🙄

-for this tho like ellie loves her and comes home like

this teacher is so cool she knows so much abt space and stuff

bestie please write it

[post chat me] oh you sweet summer child shes not going to

and joels like who the fuck is this lady

BESTIE IM BEGGING

who cares about space when there's a fuckin apocalypse going on

joel is like you know what a real lesson is?

how to shoot a gun.

how to dress a wound.

not fucking stars and planets

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

BESTIE DO IT PLEASE

and ellie's like k cool wtv im going to school now

DO IT PLEASE PLEASE I BEG OF YOU

AND THEN THEY MEET BC JOEL GETS MAD AT ONE OF HER HOMEWORK HAHAHAHAHAHAH

he sees her drawing constellations and he's like this is fucking bullshit

THE WAY I GASPED

im gonna talk to ur teacher bc this isn't survival

BESTIE YOURE ALREADY WRITING IT SO PLEASE DO IT FOR ME

NO I CANT

[post chat me] 🙄🙄🙄🙄

ok so he confronts her in school right

OMG AND THEN

and he's like i wanna talk to the teacher who gave this homework

spicy

[post chat me] honestly hes such a karen for that ????

and they meet and he's like

this isn't survival skills there's an apocalypse going on and u have her drawing stars like a 5 year old???

HAHAHAHAHAHAH

and she's like u fockin wot m8????

>😀

there wouldn't be an earth if there weren't any planets!!!!

how else would we know how oxygen is formed and how the tides turn to get water!!!!

you big dodo bird

survival isn't all guns and shooting bc if that's all it was the rest of the world would be alive rn!!!!

and he's like oh fok me she fights back

>😞

omg he creamed his pants

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and he runs home with his tail between he's legs

and he opens one of ellie's space books

and he's like this shit cool

joel wrong sexy teacher right

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

YOU HAVE TO WRITE THIS PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

im having so much fun just telling u

im smiling at my phone like an idiot

[post chat me] well you are an idiot 🤬🤬🤬

TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE FIC AND ILL COMPILE IT FOR YOU YOU LAZY BABY

HAHAHSJSHSHSHSH

what else is there to know

hmmm

he spends the night reading the space book and the next day he asks ellie like

umm hey can u teach me more about this space shit

OMG

and she's like no old man you wanna know more you go ask my teacher

ahHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

IM SCREAMIN

and he's like .... i don't wanna bc im embarrassed but i also rly wanna know abt how the earth goes around the sun? bc that's cool

WHAT IF THIS WAS MY LAST STRAW

>😭😭😭😭

[post chat me] this modern day man doesnt know shit about the sun that so embarazzing are you not embarazzed the american school system has failed him so hard 💀💀💀💀💀

and he goes to the school and he waits for all the kids to leave bc he's embarrassed and he's like

so... the planets. they all turn around and shit? that's how we get night and day

and she's like yuh m8

KEEP GOING IM CRYING

and he's like um could you tell me more...

HES SO LOVELY

and she's like ok how about you come meet me for an hour every week after my class on wednesday

and he fucking treats that like church

waiT WAIT OMG

SHES LIKE

want to attend my class <3

we'd love to have you

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UPPP

DONT TELL ME HE SITS IN CLASS WITH THE KIDDOS

and ALL THE KIDS ARE LIKE HEY MR MILLER

HE WOULD NEVER HED SHOOT HIMSELF FIRST I THINK

THEN THEY SHOW HIM THE MACARONI STARS

[post chat me] there are two types of writers AHAHAHH

OK WAIT

MAYBE

NAURRRRRR

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

he lurks outside to listen and learn but

she catches him and is like um???

do u just want me to teach u bc all u had to do was ask

AWWWWWW

THEN HES LIKE IM A CONTRACTOR I CAN MAKE A WAYY BETTER SOLAR SYSTEM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

u didn't have to like.. sit outside the class just to learn

>😭😭😭

FRRRR JUST TAKE A SEAT

he uses all his tools to make the best goddamn solar system

OMG HE FUCKING REDOES THE CLASSROOM AND MAKES IT SPACEY AND SHIT

and he shows it to her at their weekly session all proud

and she gives him a gold star sticker

places it on his jacket

DEAD

HE NEVER TAKES IT OFF

NEVER WASHES THE JACKET

ew stinky

HAHHAHHAH I LOVE IT

he preserves it

>😔

bc he doesn't want it to get ripped off

when he uses it our

*out

HAHAAH WHAT IF SHES LIKES *pinches nose* joel? is- is your washing machine broken 💔💔💔💔

HAHAHHAHAH

STOP

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

NOOOOOO

he'll shoot himself right there and then

AND THEN HE NEVER COMES BACK

HELLPPPP

walk to a clicker and beg it to bite

EW [HE] WOULDDDD

IM CRYINGGGGGGGG

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

ELLIES LIKE HAHAHAHAH

if i was writing it i'd stop it at him doing up the classroom like u said

like some time after their weekly sessions he does that

and she's like

i think i like this dumb old man

OMG AND THEN

you cant stop thereeeeeeeeeee

BUT ITS PERFECT

LKASJHFKJASASF OK OK

Fin

[post chat me] ok ok bonus cos she still went on 🙄🙄🙄🙄`

it's the intrigue that makes it nice

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

p2 where joel comes for show and tell HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

ahhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

THE SOUND THAT LEFT MY MOUTH

AND HES LIKE SO PROUD FOR BEATING 12 YEAR OLDS PLEASEEE ✋✋✋

IM A CONTRACTOR 🤠🤠🤠🤠

he fucking hates it and is miserable at first the whole time

but then he sees her supporting him so earnestly and then he's like oh shir i like it im gonna send these 12 year olds into the ground

make them eat dust

hELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

NAURRRRRRRRR

[coconutredbulllover]

🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

hi melty face anon! 😊i saw ur ask earlier today and now im not busy so i can finally actually go thru it and answer it LOL!

your friends sound like nice normal casual fans so cheers to that! the side by side for the lulugirl description vs the fyp of possibly one of the gayest most downbad fanbases is also pretty funny LMAO yall rlly found a way to bond over the most unexpected mutual interest 🤣 do u guys ever send eachother an edit and the other is like ‘actually i already had that one liked 😝’

yeah i agree it rlly is hard out there for new fans rn the ‘you just had to be there’ thing is js completely true. like theres so much to explain that you have to either have been there or u gotta crawl into my brain and see for yourself 🤷‍♀️. the disconnect between new/old fans is tough like its not really their fault for being new wave but why did the new wave have to be crazy invasive 😭? yeah i dont blame other blog people for not having the energy to reexplain old stuff or not wanting to go find links everytime someone asks 😭 its pretty nice some anons go through the trouble of finding them tho. they got a W community fr✊(side note i like how i know exactly what your talking abt having seen other blogs LMAO). about the paige obsessed fans i do agree they have a problem with trying to find out every little bit of info about her like some kind of trend hyper fixation. however sorry but i dont think i see the connection to specifically highschool students 🤷‍♀️. i think plenty of people of all ages have joined the popularity wave and while the actually chronically obsessed ones are most likely younger (like i dont really see a 50 year old discovering tumblr to find out every little detail abt a college bb player 🤣) i dont feel like its all high schoolers esp bc theres plenty of college students on here supporting the true delulu agenda 😭.

no literally abt the pazzi tags thats so true, honestly tho the majority of the videos in the pazzi tag on any site is all still a bunch of random italian stuff LMAO (if anyones curious just look on instagram scroll for like 5 seconds and italian stuff pops up 😭). the publicity for the game was truly amazing but sadly the secret society couldnt stay hidden forever 🥲 my entire life tumblr has been known as like a dead site so i was really shocked that tiktok somehow found it like she really blew up so hard yall rediscovered tumblr for her!?!? like i said tumblrs always been a niche kinda dead website unless you stumbled across it when you were younger and saw something it in. there arent tons of people out there who want to run blogs for things they like anymore. i dont blame new people for not knowing the tumblr lore (you js had to be there in the 2000s) i dont even remember how i discovered tumblr 😭 i havent even always been an active user like now i js knew it existed and my head recognized it as a media site and i never thought more to it. i wonder what the tumblr discovery pipelines are 🤣.

i get what u mean abt blogging you thoughts .the line between speculating because your curious and wanna know but also trying not to feel creepy is so hard because you really cant deny that its creepy to be looking closely at someones life like that😭 but its like yeah i dont judge other ppl bc i like reading abt it and talking abt it😭😭😭. having an interest in smth and wanting to show your interest is literally js so human and to have to holdback your interest because the thing your interested its creepy to be TOO interested is the most frustrating thing 🥲 if i had friends who would hear out my thoughts i would not have a tumblr blog. the purpose of my blog really is simply just me wanting to talk abt smth i like with people. how i see it is keeping thoughts to yourself isnt as fun bc like who will give you a second perspective on your theories!

LMFAO they really are a family they in this together frl. i think the sense of exclusivity comes a little from the fact that they’ve been interacting with eachother for a while and have seemlessly connected with eachothers views over time so its js rlly easy to be talk about basically anything when you know all abt the other people your talking with. anyways i love your asks i js like laying down and reading it all while writing my response its so entertaining i think ive been writing this for like 2 hrs im watching baby driver on the side😭. im on the last sentence of ur ask🎉!! about my grammar and spelling its jsut like i type what im thinking and i dont wanna go back and reread it to see where there needs to be a comma 😫 LMAO. its not even just when im high but when im high i care even less 😅. you wished you were high 😯 pookie do u smoke like that? i wanna know all abt it

[appsa]

um you don't have to answer, but what about Mindy Kaling do you not like?? I'm Indian myself and i watched a little of her show and something about her just felt Not Good but i couldn't figure it out? if you could put that to words that'd be cool if not, have a good day!

Well uh. I just wanna preface this saying i dont know anything abt mindy kaling. I never watched the office or whatever sitcom she came in first and like i only found out she existed like a yr or two ago when i watched some show she produced. Just going off vibes here alone but yeah i agree the vibes in her shows are just Bad. Theyre all about like... a brown girl being surrounded by hot white men who all want her, and all the other female characters around her come off as shallow and unimportant in comparison to her so they will never be competition for her in that regard. Which sounds like yeah whatever its just trashy television.

But like i feel the grossness of that attitude in her shows rly comes thru when she depicts other indians, especially other indian women. She immediately sets them up as a rival or whatever and its honestly a little embarrassing to watch. Her internalized racism comes thru so aggressively and lol idk if its because ive been around w a Certain Kind of diaspora indians and dealt w their bullshit before but i have zero sympathy anymore for the heartbreaking dilemma of indian americans who have so much internalized racism that they hate their relatives who visit from india and give them second hand embarrassment by being "too indian" and "too perfect" with family stuff in comparison to them. I simply do not care for the self hate that poor indian americans feel around us.

More on how she depicts indians, her right wing sympathies especially visible in never have i ever, but it gets brushed off because ppl outside india will miss it because its not as obvious if ur not in tune w indian politics. Theres so many little things like the main character being completely ignorant of knowing that most of indias population eating nonveg food (showing that shes only picturing uppercaste indians when she thinks of india), the immigrant sister being told that she'd be treated as an outcast in the community if she married someone who her parents didn't pick for her (basically she'd be miserable and never find community again if she doesnt marry a guy of the same caste same religion etc), and then her actually abandoning the guy she liked for the guy her parents chose for her, and the literal shout out to modi the main chatacter's mom does like. U get it. It paints a picture. And the show still gets praised for being progressive because it has a "diverse cast".

Honestly its not even surprising to me that it came out that her brother racefaked to get into college (or whatever he did. I never looked up the details and im not interested to either). Right wingers in india have been attacking affirmative action in india (reservation for depressed classes in institutions) for literal decades because they are losing seats they feel theyre entitled to, but they have no problem going abroad and using 'diversity' to their advantage. Idk if i put it in words right but thats the vibe.

Pls do not rb btw i dont want to start shit

[yuukei-yikes]

Honestly, I love all of your Kagepro nextgen hcs! They are sooo sweet💖

Also, you said that Ayano and Shintaro would adopt 3 kids before having Ayame. I’m really excited to learn more about them. What are their names and personalities, their relationship with their parents, each other and the whole dan, their reaction when Ayame is born, ect. Sorry if its too much, but your fankids are great and I really enjoy reading your Kagepro ramblings

THANK UUU FOR LIKING MY CRINGY FANKIDS LOLLLL this is really sweet but i am afraid i have not. gone that far ahead. i dont rly have answers for any of this. mostly cuz.... i designed ayame and konoha bc as bio kids i get to like grab things from the canon characters to design them yknow and that was the fun of it to me (even if ayame truly looks just like ayano but thats the thing hehe i wanted to give her a sweet face but somehow she's frowning most of the time which makes ppl be like omg youd be cuter if you smiled more!!) erm erm erm i mean i did think some stuff like age differences and dynamics and stuff... but id be lying if i said i have any proper ocs thought out lol. mostly i have thoughts abt the first kid because in my insane sick brain i have a whole shinaya arc written. while ayano is adopting this kid I DONT EVEN HAVE A NAME FOR is when she gets back together with shintaro and shintaro goes through this process of oh my god i got ayano back after all these years and OH MY FUCKING GOD I HAVE TO BE A DAD NOW because its like. this was ayanos choice BEFORE shintaro and she probably does an ultimatum like lol i wanna be with u too but...this is gonna be my reality like im planning to be a mom and if u dont want to be along for this i totally understand. but shintaro steps up💪💪💪 at first its probably like i dont plan to parent ayano's kid we're just... taking things easy but its difficult not to immediately fall in a family dynamic as soon as it starts. i think shintaro doesnt realise he's a dad til the kid asks him if he can call him dad and then he flatscreens. also i think its a very quiet kid so sometimes he has this sorta kinship with him that he doesnt with ayano bc shes just so ALL IN UR FACE yknow. thats all just shinaya thoughts tho ok he is adopted at around 6 or 7 years old, and ayame is born like *quick math in my head trying to remember my little insane timeline i wrote in my post* 3 years later. so they have a big age difference. in my doodles i picture ayame around 11 or 12, so by that age this big brother of hers would be in college or something. she completely idolizes him and thinks of him as this unapproachable coolest guy ever especially cuz he's so much older. but for the other 2 id be lying if i told u i even imagined genders or something LOL like designing this would be leaving fankid territory and enter Proper Oc area sort of you know what i mean. i think theyre a little closer to ayame though and theyre little rascals and have a very tiny mekatrio pranking mode sort of thing. but... the other 2 would have a big age difference too. they were all adopted as like... from 6 to 10 years old ig and ayame yknow. shes baby. with this i wanted it to be like... ayame's thing is supposed to be that she is The Little Sister. like how ayano was the big sister. GET IT.. DO U GET IT... so thats sorta my thought process. i think her big siblings think the world of her and they celebrate her so much when she's born!!! her dynamic with konoha is silly bc she has so many siblings and he's an only kid and they clash a lot bc of it lol. sorry. i cant answer ur questions properly but thank u for giving me an excuse to go a lil insane

[lqfiles]

i hope you don’t mind the spam now that i know many asks don’t bother you 🤫🤫 anyways THESE BONUS CHAPTERS???? i would love to be this creative cause wth honestly i wish i could come up with as many ideas as u

i dont have much to say tbh i just love sending you these ANYWAYS im glad you’re feeling better :) sending many hugs !! ❤️❤️❤️

also i today i got an awful stomach ache after drinking soda for the first time in a while so i had to miss school and also i played fortnite w my friend and he got angry cause me and my bff were ass … anyways HOW WAS YOUR DAY??? i always get excited when you answer asks cause (im gonna be honest here) you’re the only creator i send asks to so it is super interesting to know abt your day

hope you rest well today too!!! love uuu

- 🐣 anon

BROOO TRUST THE CREATIVITY IS BARELY THERE LOLL the next bonus one is gonna be the last probs cos i can’t think of anything else to add on, but that’s also good because that means i can move onto writing other stuff YAYY!!

hsjdhdjdj that’s so cute i love receiving your asks too anon~ and thank you i think i’ve fully healed by now? well sorta kinda, and i’d love a hug you’re so cute :((

oh my, i hope you’re feeling better now !!! be careful with what you consume 😭 but at least you got to miss school, i think that’s fun! AND YOURE JUST LIKE ME IM ASS AT FORTNITE TOO i don’t play it but my younger brother is sooo good at it so every few months he will be like “u wanna try?” and well.. seems like we’re both ass 😅

my day was actually quite bad but i’m alright now loll. i kinda woke up late, and then my bus came late too which made me come to college 20 minutes late. i still had cramps and then at school i stained my skirt so that was fun.. i was just really tired but it was all good when i got home and napped for like 3 hrs. i feel so special knowing i’m the only person you send asks to omfg.. you’re making me blush ILY !!!!

hope you have a nice day or amazing sleep 💋

[videostak]

duuude my living situation sucks so much donkey dick it makes me wish i could like cry :’( srlsy just got cussed out by my dad for not doing things that are supposed to be other ppls chores. i wish i could pinpoint the point in my life where my family started seeing me as their personal maid to yell at whenever anythings a mess. i know it started with me doing the dishes (my family and mom specifcally had stated that we would all help with the dishes and then after like a week no one else helped and it all fell on me and since then theyve just stopped doing stuff that they used to help out w/ so now im like doing everything basically or at the leeast the one whos expected to keep things tidy) probably the closest ive ever been to ssaying fuck you to one of my family members let alone a living person at all. tho i thought things would be crazy dire when it reached the point of being chewed out for things that arent even my responsibility but in reality when i felt like saying it i realized like it would have no impact. like my dad said fucking 600 times while chewing me out and i was like didnt kno he reached that point where he just cusses his own family members out right out the gate. it was literally so insane hes insane and just has such a fkd idea of what like dumbass nuclear family bs. every1 else puts up with his shit and just avoids talking to him and i feel like im the only one who actually takes a stand for myself cause idk i feel like i dont have anything to lose. if he kicks me out ill live on the streets die on the streets idc like just so fucked living like this. every1 expects to clean up after them but if they catch me cleaning up after them thhey act like im babying them and not letting them be adults its so fkd like theres truly no way out the only way out is just like thru with blunt force  i think. like im so sick of my dad theres so many times id put up with his bs and take his side on things but i rly do not wanna talk or even entertain the idea of talking to him to him. literally anytime any1 talks to him he just turns it into a 30 minute lecture and he acts so childish when things dont go his way. like when i got furniture for my room and he was annoyed cause i didnt ask him for furniture (wtf) and  then once when i said i was looking for a round lil table and he takes me to the garage to show me a long rectangle table that doesnt even match the other furniture in my room and when i say its not what i was looking for he goes all silent and just guides me out lol. liek when i was a kid i thought it was so amazing that my mom and dad got married when they were p young (dont remember the ages exactly but im p sure my mom was 19 and my dad was idk how many years older he is but just like a few) but now like i see so clearly how totally much it stunted their growth. they both act like little kids and never listen or behave like adults can never take accountability or give actual apologies like def made me realize u should wait as long as possible to get married. i guess its good they got married or atleast had sex since it means i got to be born (yay) but everything else abt it is a real bad deal. rly dont see myself being able to move out anytime soon but ill honestly just keep at the work and save up money and like some day go back to college and hopefully make connections to finda roommate or smthn.

[autisticstarseed]

god i just wanna make shit. i wanna make shit so bad. i wanna create full length movies and a 3 season tv series and an animated kids film and a sitcom and even just a handful of short films and it is all. completely infeasible bc of costs and skill requirements. i have 0 credentials 0 connections and 0 dollars. so i just sit here writing detailed visually elaborate scripts for weeks straight in google documents knowing the entire time how much im pouring my heart into fleshing out these ideas to make them something beautiful for others and that i am probably the only one that will ever see them. and yes capitalism is the main problem i do blame the bitch but honestly. capturing the illusion of another life is just simply a harder task than anyone realizes until they look into what it takes to make a film and then suddenly you realize the ‘camera’ in your head may never be the same as what you could capture with a real one. so i just keep writing scripts for the sake of having ideas. but i want more

[corantus]

Any advice for getting into art school or what its like when you get there?

i gotta be honest i still have no idea if i did the whole Art School Thing correctly. i have had a c's get degrees experience w school lets say.

but honestly grades in art school dont super matter i think it's valuable to just put your efforts into learning what you want from every class (animation employers dont care about your gpa lol) and just worry abt doing what it takes to pass. and dont let crunch culture get its claws in you. have a hobby where u go outdoors

in terms of getting in:

if theres a portfolio day event in your city, or some other opportunity to speak with / show your stuff to the admissions ppl from the schools you're applying for, you should make sure to go, its just nice to get more personalized info abt what you need to submit

if you have no idea what you wanna do community college art classes are great. i went to cc part time for 2 yrs before going to mcad, it was just nice to still work on art while figuring out where i wanted to go

mcad was my liike 3rd choice safety school that i went to for financial reasons and i still had a good experience. its very true that art school is what you make of it

[grapesodatozier]

so close to the real thing (closer than you think)

rating: explicit

word count: 6.8k

summary: Eddie's been pining over Richie for as long as he can remember. He loves everything about Richie; especially how much Richie loves touching him. It's a little inconvenient, though. Eddie copes with his pent up sexual tension by constantly checking a porn blog he's obsessed with on tumblr. This guy has the same type of body as Richie, he talks like Richie, his name is even Richie! It makes it all too easy for Eddie to pretend it really is Richie while getting himself off to all of the blog's content.

You'll never guess what he finds out when he starts sexting this stranger named Richie from his anonymous porn blog.

tags: friends to lovers, porn with feelings, love confessions, dom/sub dynamics, bi dom top richie, gay sub bottom eddie, the most oblivious pining idiots in the world lol we love them

notes: this is one of my more ridiculous ideas but I had so much fun with it lol. also as a note you probably should not approach people on the internet the way they do in this fic, but they're just v enthusiastic and everything here is v consensual!! still tho definitely don't take this indulgent fic as a guide on how to approach real people online lmao. okay have fun!!

read on ao3 or below!!

notsfw under the cut

Eddie Kaspbrak’s friends were his entire world; time spent with them meant everything to him. But he also really valued his alone time. He’d always been the sort who needed time to just sit on a grassy hill and watch the trains go by, to catch up on comics in his room, to get lost in Netflix shows or even just his thoughts as he moseyed around his apartment—one he live in by himself, for when these moods hit. He needed time to himself to unwind. And sometimes he unwound by scrolling through some porn blogs on tumblr with his hand in his pants.

There was one blog that he was particularly fond of. There were other blogs more catered to his personal interests, namely blogs that didn’t feature women like this one did. But there was a good balance of genders represented, so Eddie figured he could just scroll past those posts. This guy was worth it. His pictures were ridiculously hot, and his dirty talk was even hotter.

Also, his name was Richie. Which Eddie refused to acknowledge as part of the draw.

It was harder to ignore tonight. He’d been out with the losers, and Richie had just been so touchy. And there was something about the way he'd been talking; his voice was lower than normal, slower in a way that made Eddie’s stomach flip. And his touches had lingered, his hand squeezing Eddie’s hip slow, then lazily brushing against his ass as he dropped it. Eddie could hardly take it. He brushed it off as Richie just being tired from work, but god, Eddie wanted it to mean more. The hardest part was hiding how much he wanted Richie to keep doing it.

There were so many things Eddie wanted Richie to do to him. He wanted Richie to touch him harder, to grab him by his hips with both hands. Richie’s hands were so big; Eddie just knew Richie could manhandle him so easily, so roughly. He wanted to know what it would feel like to have Richie’s hands all over him, grabbing at his ass and his thighs, holding his wrists down, making him feel so small. While Eddie would never admit it, huffing at every short joke Richie made, but he loved being shorter than Richie. He loved how safe he felt when Richie held him. And he was dying to know how small he would feel with Richie looming above him, or sitting in Richie’s lap, bouncing on his cock. He wanted to hear Richie talking to him in that low, slow voice, with that condescension Eddie did his best to pretend not to be affected by. He wanted Richie to whisper in his ear and call him all those pretty names he always dropped so casually, all those sweet ones and also ones that were a lot meaner. He wanted Richie to want him.

But it was easier to think about it than to ask for it. He knew Richie had way more experience than him. Well, okay, maybe not way more necessarily, but they were starting their third year of college, and he hadn’t wasted any time. Eddie, on the other hand, hadn’t done anything more than hand stuff with someone else. The guys he’d hooked up with were nice enough, and hot enough, but they just… weren’t Richie.

He supposed this guy on tumblr wasn’t Richie either, but at least he was everything else Eddie wanted. None of his hookups had been so, well, dominant, and that was this guy’s whole thing. He was dominant and a top and into guys that looked like Eddie. He even kind of talked like Richie, and he was apparently pining over his best friend, just like Eddie was. It had him completely smitten. Plus, internet-Richie’s crush had brown eyes like Eddie, and he ran track, just like Eddie did. Internet-Richie had posted once about his dick getting hard watching his friend at his track meet, and Eddie had come so hard that night, his track shorts around his ankles, imagining his Richie thinking those things about him.

Eddie was in bed now, in nothing but his boxers and one of Richie’s old shirts that had been Eddie’s for a while now. Still reeling from the way Richie had been acting that night, he logged into his porn account on his phone and scrolled through his dash for a grand total of thirty seconds before going immediately to internet-Richie’s blog. A thrill went through Eddie’s body when he saw that he had just posted. He’d written, “god my friends gonna fuckn kill me with that ass, i wanna plow him so bad” then reblogged it and added, “reminder that my asks and dms are always open if any pretty needy little subs need help getting off. please come be sluts in my messages.” Eddie’s breath caught in his throat when he saw that there was a picture, too, one of him gripping his hard cock, his boxers pulled down just enough for Eddie to see the dark hair around the base of his cock. Eddie moaned at the sight. His cock was so nice, so long and thick and pink. And fuck, his fingers. They were so long and slim, almost as nice as his-Richie’s.

Eddie scrolled a little farther down, his heart racing. There were a lot of reblogs, but some original posts here and there, things like, “what i wouldn’t do to have a pretty guy drooling all over my cock rn,” and, “in the mood to get someone dick drunk. wanna fuck a someone so hard they forget their own name.” One that made Eddie nearly choke said, “want someone i can pump my come into whenever i want, over and over again. want a sub i can keep full of my come all the fuckn time.” That post had Eddie getting out his lube.

It also had him thinking about internet-Richie’s most recent post, his post about his DMs being open.

Eddie bit his lip and thought about it. He’d sent internet-Richie some asks before from his porn blog (his blog didn’t have his name on it, just the teddy bear emoji, since he privately thought the teddy/Eddie rhyme was fun and clever, and also it was cute), and he’d seemed plenty happy enough to respond then. Still, it felt like a much bigger step to DM him, to talk to him just one on one. But the more he read his posts, the more he thought about his-Richie and how he’d touched Eddie that night, the easier it was to convince himself to shoot his shot with this stranger.

Eddie just messaged him a simple, “hi,” with a heart emoji. It was innocent enough, but his heart was still racing.

Internet-Richie responded a lot faster than Eddie was expecting. Honestly he hadn’t been expecting a response at all. But he said:

hiya cutie (; ive been hoping youd message me

Eddie flushed. He couldn’t help but hear cutie in his-Richie’s voice—especially given how often Richie used the nickname. really? he typed back.

fuck yes, ur cute little messages make me so hard. i can tell ur a pretty little thing just from the way you type

Eddie was blushing deep. Pretty little thing. That was hotter than it should’ve been. He wanted his Richie to talk to him like that, in that deep, sleepy voice.

there’s no way you can tell that from some messages :P, Eddie sent.

His heart stopped at the next messages internet-Richie sent.

oh, u dont think so?

why dont u send me some pics to prove me wrong (;

Oh my god, Eddie thought, his breath coming short. His head swam at the thought of sending this guy nudes, of showing himself off to someone who clearly wanted to see him, who would know how to take care of him and fuck him the way he liked, a guy with his crush’s fucking name and body type and hands. It had Eddie’s cock hard and leaking, and he slowly slid a finger inside of himself.

But just because the thought turned him on didn’t mean he was gonna send this stranger what he wanted so easily, even if he desperately wanted to.

you’d like that, wouldn’t you?

He fingered himself open as he waited for a response, working his way up to two fingers. It was nearly impossible to ignore his cock, but he didn’t want to come before the conversation even had a chance to start.

fuck ya i would, internet-Richie responded. Then, in a second message, whats wrong baby? you shy? ill show u mine ;)

Eddie's breath caught. God, this guy even made stupid shit sound hot, just like Eddie’s Richie. This was unreal.

i’ve seen yours, Eddie pointed out.

ya and you musta liked it if ur messaging me rn

Eddie bit his lip. ...maybe

aw thats cute sweetheart. u know i can see all the needy little tags you add when u reblog my stuff right?

Eddie blushed. He’d kind of always hoped he’d read them, but he never thought he actually did. i didn’t know you read those

oh ya, read them, jerk off to them. bit of a size queen, aren’t you? ;) it’s cute. makes me so fuckn hard when u talk abt how u want me to fill you up

Eddie whimpered out loud, sliding a third finger into himself. Fuck, he wanted that cock inside of him so bad. But right now one of his toys would have to do, once he was stretched out enough. He sped up his fingers, getting impatient. Gathering up all of his horny courage, he sent, show me.

what, no please? only good boys who use their manners get dick pics babydoll

Eddie pouted and whined to himself, making quick work of sliding his hot pink vibrator inside of himself—well, as quickly as he could without hurting himself. He moaned as it filled him up, making pleasure spread deep through his body. Slowly pumping it in and out, he reached for his phone. please, he typed, please let me see? wanna know what to picture while i fuck myself with my vibrator. He even added the wide eyed pouting emoji to really milk the whole begging thing. He knew he’d been playing a little coy, but now with the way internet-Richie was talking to him he was getting desperate.

well fuck baby since ur begging ;)

Eddie held his breath as he waited for the picture, slowly rocking his toy in and out, savoring the feeling. He wished it was Richie doing it, wished it was his cock. The lines between which Richie blurred; he wanted to get fucked by either of them, both of them.

What Eddie received when his phone lit up was not a picture, but a video. It was short, just a few seconds of Richie’s hand dragging wetly, smoothly over his cock, but it had Eddie drooling. The room was dark, so he’d used a flash, and it made the mix of what Eddie assumed was precome and spit glisten as the swollen head of Richie’s cock disappeared and reappeared from behind his fingers. Eddie must’ve played it at least five times, fucking himself a little faster, before remembering to say something back. And to take a video of his own. fuck, I want you so bad, want you to fucking ruin me, he wrote back. A part of him couldn’t believe how openly desperate he was being, but he found that he liked it; he liked the way it made him blush, he liked the way it felt to beg, to ask for what he wanted.

Richie’s response came fast: show me kitten. show me how you want me to fuck your pretty little ass.

Eddie moaned at the pet name; casual little nicknames were such a weakness for him. He was already so far gone, just picturing Richie’s cock inside of him, picturing him stroking his cock to thoughts of Eddie. The attention had his cock hard and leaking as he thrust his vibrator even deeper inside of himself, pumping it in and out a few more times before rolling over and getting on his hands and knees. It was hard to take a video from this angle, but he wanted to show off his ass and hide his face. Plus, there was something so hot about having his ass in the air and his face shoved in his pillow, looking like the perfect image of someone desperate to be fucked. He loved the way it made him feel, loved the thought of being so open for someone. For Richie.

He ended up shooting a short video as well, about ten seconds of him sliding his vibrator slowly in and out of himself, letting out soft little moans. He was pretty pleased with the way it turned out, his hole pink and smooth and wet as it stretched around his toy. The angle was a little weird, showing a lot of his room once or twice when his hand slipped a little, but overall he thought his ass looked amazing, if he did say so himself. He sent it and said, feels so good. do you want me to go faster?

As he sent it, he got settled on his back, forcing himself to go slow as he fucked himself while he waited for internet-Richie’s response. It was taking longer than before, and Eddie was getting antsy; it was so hard to drag it out, to not get ahead of himself. But whatever Richie was doing, Eddie knew it would be worth the wait. Still, he pouted as his cock ached, begging for attention.

He almost jumped out of his skin when he heard a knock at the door.

He groaned to himself and stayed put, fucking himself even slower as he waited for whoever it was to leave. But then the knocking continued, loud and incessant and obnoxious, and Eddie knew exactly who it was. He also knew he wasn’t going to go away any time soon, which honestly made him smile and blush. Richie had terrible timing, but Eddie would never be upset to see him.

Reluctantly, he slowly slid the toy out and pulled on his shorts, leaving his shirt off. He still had a pretty obvious boner, but his horny brain did not mind the idea of Richie seeing it. So he strode lazily down the hall, shouting a performatively annoyed, “I’m coming!” Finally, he opened the door, cocking his hip to the side and giving Richie an expectant look. “Can I help you?” he asked, a small smile dancing around the corner of his lips. He had to fight off a smirk at the wide eyed look Richie gave him as he ran his eyes over Eddie’s body.

“Fuck,” he muttered lowly, his eyes trained on Eddie’s cock, which was getting even harder the more Richie stared. Eddie bit his lip and grinned a little, making doe eyes at Richie. But Richie didn’t meet his gaze—instead he brushed past Eddie, his mouth still hanging open as he made his way urgently toward Eddie’s bedroom.

“Richie?” Eddie asked, a little let down that Richie’s hands weren’t all over him right now. But hey, if he was heading to Eddie’s bedroom he figured that was at least the right direction. He closed his front door and followed Richie into his room, where he found him staring at the bright pink vibrator on the bed. As confident and horny as Eddie was feeling, that still made him blush. He was only human. Crossing his arms, he said, bashful now, “I was kind of in the middle of something.”

Richie looked over at him, his cheeks bright red under his freckles. Then he got a glimmer of that trademark shit-eating grin on his face. “Eds, you fucking slut,” he said, sounding both delighted and breathless. “You are so fucking hot.”

Eddie flushed and tried not to squirm, but he couldn’t help but press his legs together, his eyes brightening. Fuck, was this actually happening? Shit, he needed to think of something witty to say. “You gonna do anything about it?” Okay, that kinda sounded like a corny porn, but he had to give himself credit for even being able to form words just after his lifelong crush and personal wet dream had just admitted his attraction to him.

“I think I already have been,” Richie said, still grinning.

Eddie cocked an eyebrow at him. He couldn’t help but smile back. “Oh yeah? How do you figure that?”

Eddie was expecting a confession. He was expecting something along the lines of you think I don’t notice how you look at me? or did you really think those were casual touches earlier? What he was not expecting was for Richie to unlock his phone and hold it up, showing Eddie the video he had just taken, the video he’d sent to internet-Richie.

Oh. Oh. Oh fuck.

“Oh my god, that’s you?” Eddie cried in disbelief.

“You’re telling me you didn’t recognize this dick?” Richie asked, swaggering over to Eddie, clearly enjoying himself.

“How did you recognize it was me?”

Richie nodded toward the Thundercats poster on Eddie’s wall, then to the model train that sat on his dresser. “What other guy has decor like that and the ass to match?”

Eddie grinned and shook his head. “That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Well pardon me for not being especially eloquent when I’ve just learned that the guy I’ve been masturbating to since I learned how to and been in love with for even longer has been masturbating to me too.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide, all thoughts of getting fucked leaving for a moment. “You’re in love with me?” he asked, his voice as soft as his smile.

Richie was not a bashful person, but the little laugh he let out just then was close to it. “Have been my whole life, but thanks for finally noticing.”

Eddie shook his head and stepped closer, until he had to crane his head up to meet Richie’s gaze. “I love you too.”

Richie’s eyes widened behind his thick frames. Eddie had only seen that look in Richie’s eyes a few times before, but he never wanted to lose sight of it again. He always wanted Richie to look at him like that. But then Richie was closing his eyes and leaning down. It only took Eddie a second to get with the program, drinking in the moment just a little longer before letting his own eyes fall shut as he pressed his lips against Richie’s.

It started gentle enough, if deep and passionate and intentional. But then Richie’s hands were on Eddie’s bare waist, skin against skin, and Eddie was gasping into Richie’s mouth, his hands coming up and resting against Richie’s chest. He curled his fingers into Richie’s shirt as Richie ran his tongue over Eddie’s lips, just before pulling away. He laughed at Eddie’s indignant little whine.

“Oh, you mean you don’t want me to take off my shirt right now?” he smirked as Eddie tried to pull him closer by the offending fabric. Huffing, Eddie conceded and let go long enough to let Richie pull the shirt off over his head.

“Oh,” he said softly, his voice a little, awed moan as he drank in Richie’s chest. It wasn’t like Richie had never been shirtless in front of Eddie before, but Eddie had never felt like he was allowed to really look at Richie all those times. But now he could; now he could touch. And he did, running his fingers over Richie’s smooth, warm skin, over his acne scars and blackheads and freckles. “Fuck, Richie,” he sighed before pressing his lips to Richie’s collarbones, trailing them all over Richie’s beautiful chest.

Richie gave a breathless, almost shy laugh as he stroked Eddie’s hair. “Damn, Eds, never pegged you as a tits guy.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Eddie giggled, bringing his lips back to Richie’s. They both smiled into it, getting lost for a moment as Richie’s hands slid slowly down Eddie’s sides. His hands lingered on Eddie’s hips for a moment before he slid them further down and grabbed at Eddie’s ass, making him gasp.

“Is that any way to talk to the guy who’s about to rail you ‘til you can’t walk?”

“What’re you gonna do about it?” Eddie asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Spank me?”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Richie smirked. He gave Eddie’s ass a playful smack, making Eddie gasp again and fall into him, needing more. Richie’s voice was dripping with adoration as he purred, “Little brat,” and pulled Eddie against him, kissing him again. Eddie went with it easily and happily parted his lips to let Richie lick into his mouth. Richie had one hand gripping Eddie’s jaw and the other on his ass, touching him in a way that exuded a command Eddie was desperate to follow. God, Eddie knew Richie had big hands, but they felt huge on him like this. It was dizzyingly hot. And the way Richie’s tongue was teasing his had Eddie’s knees going weak. His dick was throbbing in his shorts, aching to finish what he’d started, what had been interrupted. When he thought about it all—about playing with himself for Richie, about the video Richie had sent him, about all those things Richie had said about filling Eddie up—he felt himself clench down on nothing, desperate to get fucked. Desperate to feel Richie’s cock so deep inside of him.

“Richie,” he whined into the kiss, pulling on Richie’s belt loops, “please.” He pressed himself urgently against Richie and rutted shamelessly against his thigh.

“Fuck, you’re a needy little thing, aren’t you?” His voice was cocky and teasing, but there was an apparent undercurrent of wonder there as well.

Eddie shoved his face into Richie’s neck and whined, grabbing onto Richie’s wrists without even knowing what his goal was. “Richie,” he whimpered, sounding pitiful and ruined already.

“What do you want, baby?” Richie’s voice made it clear that he was enjoying seeing Eddie this wrecked, and that just made Eddie even harder. “Come on, tell me, use your words.”

Eddie squirmed as Richie held him close, but still not touching him in any relieving way. “I need you inside,” Eddie said, his voice high and soft as he squirmed in Richie’s grip. “God, please, Richie, need you to fuck me. Fuck me so hard I can’t even think. Fuck me like I’m your little toy.”

Eddie could hardly believe the words coming out of his mouth, and judging by the gasp he heard Richie let out, he’d caught Richie off guard too. But if the hard bulge in his jeans that brushed up against Eddie was any indication, he was apparently just as turned on as Eddie was. Besides, Eddie knew from his blog that Richie was really into that sort of thing too—and, apparently, really into the idea of doing those things with Eddie. The realization that Richie had been saying all those filthy things about him had him grinding against him with even more fervor, kissing his neck with a heated confidence. Richie moaned, and Eddie could feel the warmth of it spreading through him. “Yeah, sweetheart? You want to feel me inside you? You think you’re ready for me?”

“Yes,” Eddie sighed, looking up at Richie with wide, desperate eyes. He shivered at the new look in Richie’s eyes, the blue nearly entirely eclipsed by how wide his pupils were. He looked hungry for Eddie; Eddie wanted to feel it. “‘M ready, Richie, please, so open for you.” He looked to the toy on his bed pointedly, but Richie only gave a deep laugh.

“Oh honey, that’s cute that you think that little thing is gonna have you ready for my cock.” Eddie’s breath caught; that toy wasn’t small. Before he could gather his scattered brain enough to react, Richie was scooping him up and tossing him on the bed, the toy falling forgotten to the floor. Richie moved Eddie onto his back, and Eddie went happily, pliantly. Richie’s fingers were cool against Eddie’s burning skin as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of Eddie’s shorts, slowly dragging them over his hips and down his legs, tossing them to the floor. Eddie’s cock was dripping with precome, his chest flushed a bright red as he squirmed under Richie’s gaze. Eddie been dreaming of Richie manhandling him like this for he didn’t even know how long; he couldn’t help the way he reacted. And he especially couldn’t help the pleased little sound he made when Richie murmured, “God, you’re gorgeous, Eds.” Then Richie was grabbing him by the ankles, gently but firmly spreading Eddie’s legs, and Eddie let out the most pathetic, genuine moan he’d ever heard. “Fuck, baby, you sound pretty. You like when I spread you open?” Richie asked. He was smirking down at Eddie, but Eddie could see how flushed he was, could see the thrilled awe in his dark, hungry eyes as Eddie nodded.

“Richie, please,” Eddie whimpered. “I need you so bad.” He sat up, reaching for Richie’s belt, but Richie easily pressed him back against the mattress with a large hand on the center of his chest. The confidence in Richie’s dominance took Eddie’s breath away, and he stayed right where he was, nice and obedient, as he watched Richie get off the bed and slowly undo his belt, then his button and zipper. He took his time dragging his jeans and boxers off, enough time to let Eddie’s eyes linger on the reveal of the dark hair under Richie’s waistband. Then Richie’s cock was bouncing up against his stomach, hard and flushed and fucking long. Eddie moaned at the sight and fisted the sheets underneath him. He wanted so badly to get his mouth on Richie, to breathe him in and be nice and good for Richie on his knees. But he was also desperate to get fucked; his hole clenched down on nothing at the thought, and then it was all he could think about again. “Richie,” he repeated, whining now as he reached for him. “Stop being such a tease.”

Richie laughed as he moved easily out of Eddie’s grip and climbed on top of him. Eddie gasped softly at the sight of Richie above him, his dark curls surrounding his face, his full, pink lips pulled into the most beautiful smile Eddie had ever seen in his life. He ran his hands over Richie’s chest and sides, marveling at the fact that this was really happening. Then, his eyes flickering down, he tentatively brought his hand to Richie’s cock.

“Oh, fuck,” they said, both at the same time, making them giggle together.

“Fuck, Eds, your pretty little hand looks so cute wrapped around my cock,” Richie teased in a low, rough voice. Eddie shivered; he couldn’t tell if Richie was praising him or degrading him, but either way it made his head fuzzy.

“‘M not that little,” Eddie grumbled out of habit. But he was clearly breathless. He’d never been good at pretending not to like Richie’s compliments, however teasing.

“Aw, but you are, baby,” Richie cooed, nuzzling his nose against Eddie’s and pressing a lingering kiss to his lips. “You’re so cute and tiny for me. I don’t even know if we’ll be able to fit my cock inside you.”

“I can,” Eddie whined, both indignant and impatient. He bucked his hips up, but Richie held him down. He gasped when he felt the warm, soft skin of Richie’s cock press against his stomach. Looking down, he saw that Richie had his cock lying on Eddie’s stomach, showing just how deep he would be once he was inside Eddie.

“You sure about that, babydoll?” While the teasing note was still there, Richie’s voice got noticeably softer as he said, “I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Eddie’s chest swelled at that. Cupping Richie’s face in his hands, he insisted, “I can take it.” Then he reached down and took Richie in his hand, glowing with pride when Richie let out a low moan. “Richie, please, I want you so bad.”

“Okay, baby,” Richie agreed, turning his head to kiss Eddie’s palm. “Fuck, I want you, too.” But he stalled. “Have you ever… like, been fucked before?”

Eddie flushed. “Well, not by someone else, but I have some toys. I’m not gonna break, Richie.” He huffed, but the way Richie was looking at him soothed any ruffled feathers.

“I’m your first?” His smile was soft, and while his eyes glittered, there was nothing teasing about his tone.

“I didn’t wanna do it with anyone else,” Eddie mumbled. He tried to look away, but Richie pulled him into a kiss.

“Fuck, I never thought you’d want me,” he chuckled. “Sorry, that was depressing, I just mean I can’t believe we didn’t do this sooner, you know?”

Eddie beamed, a small, giddy giggle dancing on his lips. “Well it’ll happen sooner if you stop talking so much.” But his smile, and all of the little kisses he planted on Richie’s freckled shoulders told Richie that Eddie never wanted him to stop talking.

“Alright, alright, sheesh, I know I’m hot but you don’t gotta rush me.” Eddie was still giggling when Richie kissed him, and he could feel that Richie was smiling too. “Where’s your lube?”

Eddie stretched his hand out and patted the bed for a moment, searching. After what was probably only four seconds but felt like an eternity, he finally found the bottle and handed it eagerly to Richie. “Oh, right,” Richie smirked, “you’re already wet for me, aren’t you?” Eddie moaned as Richie swiped his fingers over Eddie’s slick hole, pressing in just a bit. His fingers went in easily, and he pumped them slowly, drawing little, breathy moans out of Eddie. Richie’s fingers were a lot longer and thicker than his own, and they felt amazing, but they weren’t what he wanted in that moment.

“Richie, fuck me,” he whined.

“Aw, no please? Again?” Richie tsked and shook his head, curling his fingers against Eddie’s prostate, making him cry out. “I told you, sweetheart, only good boys who use their manners get fucked.”

“Please,” Eddie cried. He rocked his hips and grabbed at Richie’s shoulders, at his arms, not even sure what his goal was there other than to get Richie closer, to get his attention, to show him how desperate he was. “Please fuck me, please.” He sounded pathetic begging like this, but that just made him harder. And it made Richie’s pupils even wider as he slid his fingers out of Eddie and pressed a kiss to his lips.

“Good boy,” he purred. Eddie moaned and arched into Richie’s touch, but he only gave Eddie one more kiss on his cheek before pulling back and covering his cock in lube. Eddie watched, entranced, as Richie’s hand moved smoothly over his cock, glistening and slick. Then Richie was gently spreading Eddie’s legs even further and pressing the head of his cock against Eddie’s hole.

“Yes,” Eddie whimpered brokenly, grasping at the sheets beneath him. “Richie, please.” Meeting his gaze, he said softly, “I need you.”

“I’ve got you,” Richie assured him in a voice that made Eddie feel like he was glowing. Richie took Eddie’s hand in his and entwined their fingers, using his other hand to guide his cock inside of Eddie, who gasped at the feeling. God, he couldn’t believe this was happening. He couldn’t believe his first time was going to be with his favorite person. He couldn’t believe he was finally getting exactly what he wanted. Love flooded through him, warm and perfect, somehow both soothing and electrifying as he watched Richie’s face. Eddie’s mouth dropped as Richie pressed into him, deeper and deeper and still fucking deeper, until finally Richie let out a low moan and Eddie felt absolutely breathless. The stretch was intense, and he held onto Richie tightly as he caught his breath. “Are you alright?” Richie asked. His voice was strained, but the care and concern in it was clear. “You don’t have to take all of it if it’s too much.”

Eddie wanted to laugh at the remark or roll his eyes, but with how breathless and dizzied by pleasure he already was, he had to admit Richie had a point. “Just need a minute,” he gasped. Richie ran a soothing hand over Eddie’s skin, helping him even out his breathing and relax. The feeling of Richie’s cock twitching in anticipation inside of him had him letting out little moans as he adjusted, getting more and more used to the feeling until he felt comfortable enough to tell Richie he could move. Richie kissed him before he did, his lips soft against Eddie’s, a reassuring weight. Eddie breathed in sharply as Richie pulled back, grabbing at Richie’s shoulders.

Richie immediately stopped. “You okay, baby?” he asked, caressing Eddie’s face.

Eddie wanted to melt. Richie was always touching him, always jokingly flirting with him, but this unabashed concern and, well, love had previously been reserved for dire situations, like panic attacks or injuries. Eddie couldn’t help the dopey smile that bloomed on his face as he tilted his chin up and kissed Richie. “I’m okay,” he said breathlessly. “It’s just a little different from my vibrator.” They both gave a shaky laugh as Richie nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s.

“Better, I hope?” he grinned.

“Can’t tell yet,” Eddie retorted. Another snarky comment was on the tip of his tongue when Richie pulled his hips further back, effectively sucking all the air—and attitude—from Eddie’s chest. And then Richie was pushing back in, and Eddie let out a moan he couldn’t have faked if he tried, relaxing back into the mattress as his eyes fell shut. It was the best thing he’d ever felt, pleasure and relief flooding through his body. They’d been building up this tension for years; Eddie had figured it would feel good to break it, but it really felt magical, like something had just clicked into place. Feeling Richie inside of him, rocking his hips carefully, feeling Richie twitch as he tried not to lose control had Eddie’s head reeling. Eddie’s eyes fluttered open, focusing on Richie above him, on how flushed his face was. When Richie met his eye, pressing in deep, Eddie let out a small, “Fuck.”

“Yeah? Does that feel good, sweetheart?”

Richie was smirking as he said it, but there was something else sparkling in his eyes. Something giddy and awed. Something that made Eddie sigh dreamily, “I love you.”

Richie’s eyes widened for a moment before he pressed his lips firmly against Eddie’s, his hands roaming over Eddie’s body like he couldn’t choose where to put them, where to touch him. “I love you so much,” he beamed, pressing a few more kisses to Eddie’s cheeks. Eddie giggled at the feeling, but then Richie’s hips moved just a little faster, pressing him in just a little deeper, and he was back to melting under Richie’s touch, clinging to him as he rocked his hips with Richie’s. “Fuck, you’re so amazing, baby, so fucking beautiful. You look so good like this, holy shit.”

Eddie smiled almost drunkenly at Richie’s ability to ramble even when blowing Eddie’s mind. “Feels so good,” he moaned, his voice breathy and just a little bit higher than normal. He wrapped his legs around Richie’s waist. “Please, Richie, please.”

“Fuck, baby, wanna make you feel like this all the fucking time,” Richie groaned as he picked up the pace. Eddie whined in pleasure at the change, and that just spurred Richie to go faster, harder, until he was well and truly fucking Eddie, both of them moaning with every thrust.

“Oh my god,” Eddie cried, “ohmygodohmygodhmygod, oh fuck, Richie, please.” It felt so amazing, Richie fucking into him like this, but he needed that little bit more. His cock was throbbing desperately, achingly hard; he needed to feel Richie’s hand on him. “Richie, please,” he whimpered, “please, please touch me. I need you, I need you so bad, please, Richie.” Eddie was pouting now, grabbing aimlessly at Richie, his legs still wrapped tight around him.

“Fuck, you’re so hard for me,” Richie marveled, his voice sweet and condescending as he wrapped his hand around Eddie’s cock. Eddie nearly screamed at the contact, his back arching off the bed. Richie laughed a little, which just made Eddie even harder. The way Richie spread his precome over his cock, twisting his wrist just so as he stroked him had that familiar tension coiling in his lower stomach. “Aw, does that feel good? You gonna come on my cock, kitten?”

“Fuck, yes!” Eddie screamed. He gripped at the sheets as Richie stroked him, his voice washing over Eddie, mixing with the pleasure of Richie’s touch, of his thrusts. “Yes, yes, yes, please let me come, please, please, please.”

“That’s a good boy,” Richie purred, and Eddie could feel himself tipping over the edge at the words, at how low and affected Richie’s voice was. He groaned out, “Come on my cock like a good boy, princess,” and pure pleasure crashed over Eddie like a wave. He arched his back and cried out as he came, his moans filling the room as he squirmed under Richie, grabbed at him, at the sheets. It was fucking ethereal. He felt somehow so in tune with his body and yet so detached, like he was floating. He was barely cognizant of what Richie was saying, but when he put the sounds together and realized Richie had just said, panting, “Fuck, baby, gonna come,” Eddie felt like a live wire again.

“In me,” he said urgently. His mind was still a little too scattered for full sentences, but he knew what he wanted. God, he felt like he needed it. Like he needed to feel that connected to Richie. “Richie, come inside me, please.”

Richie apparently didn’t need to be told twice; he let out a moaned, “Oh, fuck,” before burying his face in Eddie’s neck, his breathy moans like music in Eddie’s ear. And then, as Eddie was coming down from his own high, he felt the holiest thing in the world: Richie’s cock, twitching inside of him, then his warm come filling Eddie up. It was unreal, being this close to him. Richie clutching at him as he came. It was even better than the little fantasies Eddie occasionally allowed himself. Richie was here, in his arms, pressing kisses to his neck as he caught his breath. Eddie was stroking his hair and rubbing his back as Richie nuzzled into him. Richie’s skin pressed against his skin, his legs wrapped around Richie’s waist, then falling to his sides, but still pressed to him. Still keeping him close. There wasn’t a single thought in his head that wasn’t about Richie.

Richie pulled him from his dreamy haze with light kisses pressed up his jaw, then over his cheeks. Eddie giggled at the onslaught of affection, still reeling from how fucking hot and euphoric what they had just done together had been. But he happily accepted Richie’s kisses, his heart bursting, then racing as Richie pulled back to look in his eyes. “Holy, fuck,” Richie beamed, his face flushed and blue eyes hooded from the weight of his orgasm, even as they sparkled.

“I know,” Eddie said, returning Richie’s grin as he basked in the surreality of having Richie on top of him, his dorky yet charming smile framed by lips that were red and swollen because of Eddie. His glasses were knocked askew, and Eddie instinctively reached up to fix them. With a sense of wonder, he realized that his touch was allowed to linger this time. He ran his fingers down Richie’s cheekbones, over his jaw, cupped his cheeks. “I love you,” he said. The words spilled out over his lips like he couldn’t stand not to say them. And while it made his heart race a little to say it out loud now that the adrenaline and tension was all worked through, it felt even better this time when Richie’s face softened and he nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s.

“I love you so fucking much.” Richie’s voice rarely got that soft, that sincere; it felt like a blanket wrapping around Eddie. It felt safe, secure. It felt like a promise. And if there was anyone in the world Eddie knew he could trust, it was Richie. That feeling of everything coming together came back to Eddie as he lay there under Richie, their lips moving together, feeling light as a feather now that everything was finally out in the open.

[totopopopo]

honestly as a college freshman who's nervous abt dorms thank you for making that post abt laundry, and do you have any other advice?

Hi anon!!!!!

First of all, welcome to college!!!!! I know dorm life is.. uh, daunting, and I don’t envy you lot having to learn how to do it with a pandemic. Here’s a rundown of things I’ve learned from dorm living over the years (I had a roommate as a freshman but have had a single since then, and this year is the second year I’ve had a dog; I’ve lived in a closet converted into a room, I’ve lived in a massive luxury room, I’ve lived in a party house, I’ve lived in a quiet house, I’ve lived pre pandemic and post pandemic, I’ve had amazing neighbors and horrendous neighbors—I’ve done just about every college dorm living situation possible so I’ve picked up a few things):

I know you already saw my laundry post but I literally cannot stress that shit enough so it bears repeating. DONT LEAVE YOUR LAUNDRY FOREVER it’s super rude. In the same vein, don’t be afraid to move other people’s laundry if they’re being rude.

If there’s a communal kitchen, utilize it, but keep a few things in mind! 1. Hand wash everything, even if there’s a dishwasher (who knows whether the rest of that stuff is clean or dirty, and anyways, people WILL steal your forks). Also, wash the pots and pans you use right after you use them!! Don’t leave them for the next person, that’s super rude for one thing, and for another thing, do you know what happens when a bunch of 17-23 year olds leave their gross college cooking shit out and unwashed?? Rats. Rats happen. CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF. also I would advise washing the pots and pans you plan on using beforehand too, cause a good rule of thumb is do not trust the other people to not be gross people.

Bathrooms! Bathrooms are like, probably the worst part of dorm life for me? Just. I don’t like public showers. Gross. BUT it’s really okay and you shouldn’t stress abt it! Just wear like flip flops or something into the shower, remember to clean up after yourself, PLEASE for the love of god don’t make soup in the bathroom sink or I will personally hunt you down (like I said. I’ve seen it all). This is something that probably doesn’t have to be said but I’ll say it anyways just cause yeah, I’ve seen it all: if you REALLY want to have shower sex, don’t do it during busy bathroom hours (aka mornings afternoons evenings). If you HAVE to, do it at like 3am. That being said, PLEASE don’t do it, those are communal showers, other people also have to use them, for the love of god montressor. But if you do. Be mindful of others. Also an important bathroom note: nobody gives a shit about what you are doing as long as it isn’t affecting others. I feel like freshmen are really self conscious about, like, brushing their teeth or shitting or whatever, but I am here to promise you that literally nobody cares or really even notices. As long as you’re not shitting on the floor (please don’t, I’ve seen it happen) or sticking your bloody pads on the stall door / leaving bloody tampons on the sink (I’ve seen that too) you literally have nothing to worry about or be ashamed of, you’re TOTALLY good to go, please don’t worry! However if you are doing those things you should absolutely be ashamed and furthermore your floor mates are legally allowed to murder you.

Your walls are thinner than you think. Try not to randomly scream bloody murder (please) or loudly shit talk your neighbors.

If you have a roommate, you should ALWAYS have headphones. Stop listening to music or scrolling through idk tik tok or whatever with the volume just from your phone RIGHT NOW. it’s so fucking obnoxious. Use headphones. PLEASE use headphones. Same goes for FaceTiming, zooming, Netflix, etc etc etc. headphones. You might also wanna invest in noise canceling headphones in case your roommate didn’t get the memo

Fairy lights are cute and fun and make the room nice, but turn them off after a certain time if you have a roommate, unless they specifically ask you to keep them on!

Invest in a mini-fridge invest in a mini-fridge invest in a mini-fridge invest in a mini-fridge invest in a mini-fridge invest in a mini-fridge

Invest in fans. Invest in lamps.

Steal food from the dining halls

Don’t steal silverware from the dining halls

If you steal silverware from the dining halls, please return them

If there’s a group chat with other people on your floor, in your house, join it!!! Even if you have to mute notifications, it’s really good if you have questions for other people in the house (aka “do you know where the vacuum cleaner on the first floor went” or “who was just screaming bloody murder at 10am on a Tuesday” or “does anyone want to order takeout and split the bill w me” all of which are very good texts to send) and just to stay updated on shit in the house (aka receiving texts like “hey guys on the second floor just a warning don’t go into the bathroom there’s currently a lot of chicken noodle soup filling up one of the sinks use the downstairs bathroom” which is a bad text to receive but a good one to be aware of)

If someone else in your house has a pet, befriend that person.

I know I’ve said several different versions of this, but like, PLEASE clean up after yourself. In your room, in the bathroom, in the kitchen, in the hallway, in the laundry room, everywhere. Clean up after yourself. Don’t make other people do it. Just, seriously. Be respectful of the people around you.

I could go on, but that’s a lot already. I know this is a fucking weird transition, but you’ve got this, and I’m rooting for you. It’s gonna be okay; it’s gonna be fun. I promise. And if you have any other specific questions or worries or concerns—about dorm living, about academics, about surviving your first year, about anything, even just to talk it out—I’m always here! I suffered and learned the hard way so you don’t have to!!!! I’m happy to be here as a resource and a friend for you here!!! Good luck!! :-)

[wickedpact]

Hi! If we get a sequel one day, what little thing would you like to see in it, you know just like a detail on each character that tell us more about them? Am I clear ?? Because it is in my head but...

hmmmmmmm

andy: tbh id love to see her relationship w achilles acknowledged beyond the portrait nile spots in the cave. i feel like the addition of that relationship rlly kind of exemplifies how much andy has loved & lost over the years and how lonely she was before she found the other immortals, as well as drive home the point that... while seeking relationships w mortals is an option for the squad.... its really setting yourself up for heartbreak and is mayhaps a bad idea. it really intensifies their relationships with each other in that this is the only way they can really permanently interact with other people

additionally, with the romance nile’s prolly going to get in the sequel, id loooooooove to see andy telling nile about achilles in the context of romance, as a little mentor/student thing, maybe warning her off a little

nile: id love to see more of nile’s relationship w christianity and how that may change w/ immortality. thats kind of more of a broad thing but i find the whole religion + immortality thing fascinating. and along that vein,

joe: god i want to know what his necklace is

joenicky: tbh id really love to know if joe and nicky are married, and this is kind of a greg question more than something to be rlly addressed in the sequel, but personally i dont really see nicky and joe as viewing their relationship as anything like a marriage and i dont really see them having an desire to get married in the modern context of marriage. even if i do think ‘marriage’ is p much the closest concept we have to what joe and nicky are and its accurate for us to call it marriage, i dont think they view themselves as married. as much as I, Too, Gayly Yearn For Marriage, i just really like the idea of marriage, The Greatest Form Of Romantic Commitment Humanity Has, being this frivolous little pointless thing to them. like a couple thats been together for 60 years getting promise rings- maybe charming in its own right, but also kind of silly and pointless. im basically just talking about headcanons now, moving on.

nicky: idk man i just wanna see this bitch in a SWEATER

booker: im honestly rlly curious what his relationship with his wife was. when he talks about his Immortal Man Angst he brings up his Dead Sons rather than his Dead Wife (which i actually love) but im curious what his relationship with her was like.

(also ive said this before but id also like to see what booker and nicky’s relationship is like, bc the only stuff we really see from them is the baklava bet, which doesnt actually tell us much abt their relationship)

(additionally, ive also said this before but id also like to see what joe’s relationship w nile would look like)

the squad as a whole: mostly when we see the lads theyre either in Mission Mode or A Mission Just Went To Shit mode. id love to see what their usual day-to-day is like. how much time do they spend with eachother? how much time do they spend in abandoned safehouses? how much time do they spend on downtime? how do they spend their downtime? (besides going to college that is)

quynh: literally everything

[luvargas]

     i think i just saw LUCILA “ LU ” VARGAS ride by on a golf cart . at least i think it was her . after all , CREDIT IN THE STRAIGHT WORLD BY HOLE was blasting on the transistor radio . maybe she was on her way to work , i hear she’s a PERSONAL TRAINER . but she totally could have been on her way to SNEAK IN A SMOKE AT THE GARDEN . guess we’ll never know . you’ll definitely know its her when you see LOOSE AND TANGLED HAND WRAPS , BUTTON BADGES ON VEGAN LEATHER ,  AND HEAR THE SHRILL SOUND OF BICKERING around the country club . let’s just hope she stays off the green after hours or else the sprinklers will get her !

( new muse, messy thoughts, u get the gist. pls know the views of this chara do not reflect my own. the name’s katya, 21, she/her pronouns & im ready 2 party. feel free to hmu wnvr or drop a like to plot n ill com 2 u ! x — oh n pls be a pal n read this quick disclaimer. tysm ! )

BASICS

24 years old

15 april 1997

5′1″ or 1.55m tall

bisexual cis woman, she/her

aries sun, aqua moon, and aqua rising

love languages : quality time & acts of service

BIO POINTS

kid o’ divorce, lived w her ma in chicago til she was 6 then w her dad in highlands til 14 then back to her ma ! 

def a daddys gorl. so used to her white pop’s leniency that livin w her strict latina ma durin her teen yrs was So Not Her Vibe ergo * cue her rebel grrrl phase *

did not finish hs ! left senior yr 2 to go w her “ radically progressive ” college bf to [ insert dev country. ] they broke up after a few mos but she kept at that life for a couple more yrs

seen some places. lived in new countries. done some shit. some good, some sus, but all generally well-intentioned. tis a whole thing but u get the gist, nywy !

lu’s back in da usa by 21. rel w the ma is strained but the pa is chill w stuff, they kept in touch. he said shell get her college fund if she gets her ged so she does !

her dad is v active n stuff so shes just always been v sporty w him. lu turnin 23 w zilch plans worried him so he implored her to get certified as a personal trainer ! n when she did, he called in a few favors w a pal he knows et voilà ! ur hired.

LU AT WORK

shes been workin at the country club fr a little over a yr now. most her clients are influencer-type gals n they luv her bc shes can take rlly cute pics n stuff for content. lu sorta likes some of em n she fakes the rest for the bread. u can bet she clowns all em richies behind their back   

unless she got clients, catch her runnin’ about the club n minglin’ w the other workers. does it annoy mngmt ? yes. n she luvs that. but bc her soon-2-b-karen clients luv her n wont stand for her bein booted, she can milk that impunity

actually knows her shit n lowkey rlly enjoys the work. she picked back up the boxing n tae kwon do she did when she was younger plus she was always in the track team at school. v healthy lifestyle save for her smokin vice n the party moments

PERSONALITY 

passionate ! has lotsa opinions. helluva a drama queen, bit of a loud mouth, argumentative n stubborn but her heart’s in the right place, albeit a lil misguided. comes w the whole activist bit, bitin her tongue just aint it. highkey makes everythin political n smtms gotta realize .,.,. it just aint that deep chief. some say shes needlessly defiant, but maybe thats a in the beholder typa thing ? fingers crossed 4 lu’s sake

fun, fun, fun ! can be real naggy but shes no buzzkill. wannabe anarchist-slash-mutineer who wants 2 stick it 2 the man ! get rowdy go crazy

fight, fight, fight ! goin back to the first bit, she talks big. esp w like ,, men n the whites lol. she can actually walk her threats tho she isnt actually violent. w arguments, she likes to start em but finishin is ... ruff.  also any dare, she wont back down in either doin it or arguin why doin it wld be smth-ist. shes not the sharpest tool ok rip lu

loyal legend ! fr her friends n buds, shell turn a blind eye. pals r the only exception ! truly ride or die n will do errthng 4 em. v much a believer in the power of community n ppl needin ppl or wtvr, yk, all that stuff. shes mouthy but like, she helps ppl 

here’s a brief blurb n a more coherent look into lu as a character

TIDBITS

lu can understand spanish but hers is a bit broken, tis her secret shame shhh

she doesn’t believe in the institution. any institution. u name it, shes got beef

pls dont fact check her she cant hear u

probs lowkey thinks shes better than u bc shes vegan

prefers 2 be called “ lu ” n ny1 who insists on lucila is dead 2 her 

comments abt her not lookin like a pt w her height n frame will result in an earful n a dramatic outburst. it aint worth it chief

watches lotsa sports w her pops. mostly indiv ones. mma, boxing, tennis, track, etc

dont ask me abt her principles n politics, i cant explain em either. v inconsistent n just messy at this point tbh but here’s a lil attempt ig

she drives a 2018 prius n lives in a p nice 1br apt outside the club

her mom’s middle class n her dad is almost upper-middle class. he isnt a member of the club but, like ,,, he cld be if he wanted to lol. he spoils her sm while she hasnt rlly Spoken to her mom besides civility, rip they both stubborn, tis a vargas thing

she is v much in a comfy position money-wise n dsnt hav much Need to hustle but sis does hav a couple of organizations she regularly sends some dough to so thats nice ig

she went fr grassroots activist to a veteran twitter/tumblr/reddit/wtvr ranter n a change.org gofundme petition regular. is it burnout ? is she ok ? honestly who knows

WANTED CONNECTIONS / TAKEN CONNECTIONS

found family ! pals n squad wanted. y’all gotta hav patience or ear plugs to power thru her self-indulgent mini-rants but shell luv ya back tenfold !

carpool buds ? cld be a pal ! or maybe yall had a lil argument or small beef but lu still drives ym bc her pride ? said mother earth first even tho the tension n silly drama is funny 

homies to smoochies ! just sum nsa makin out. cld be pals, cld be flirty, idk, but if u wanna kiss her shes probs ok w that

smoke bud ! just sum1 thats her go-to 2 smoke w on her breaks. knows not to call her out on how its not healthy fr a trainer yada yada she knows ok. let her live

an ex ? idk yet shes not rlly datey but thats out there

crushes ! this bitch hot but does she know how to flirt ? not rlly. watch her fumble

debate club ! aka sum1 she bickers w relentlessly. its valid, sum1 fite her. r u a worker or a club member ? either works. its a whole club bc she can have tons, lu can be hella annoying n testy

clients ! self-explanatory. do they get along tho ? lets find out ! 

( im officially braindead now but if y’all got more ideas or think theres smth lu wld fit just lmk !!! down 4 wtvr, wld luv 2 hash it out w yall <3 ) 

[bubbled-clouds]

the coolest thing ever is having Adult Friends ™️

like yeah yeah 18 thats SO cool!! B U T !!!!!! literally like 30-40 year olds???? A N D its like a mutual respect kinda thingy??? *AHH*

rant ahead (/pos tho bc AHH)

okok S O

my mum’s friends with this aunty n uncle (get used to me calling them bc thays what Indians do) right and lets start this Right off the bat withhh THEYRE NOT HOMOPHOBIC!!!!! the uncle Literally!!!!! avoids going to stores that *are* openly homophobic bc they support conversion camps n he’s like ‘why should we torture people for living how they want to live’ he Did say he doesnt have an issue if his friends Are homophobic (im letting it slide tho bc if he Did then they woulsnt be friends with my fam and i wouldnt get to talk to them so-) THATS THE SWAG PART do i wonder if they’d change their mind knowing *i* was gay? yes. 1000% but for now i will have false(?) hope that they wouldnt (actually if i Do move out for college (which is i think kinda likely) i was planning on sending them a letter and coming out)

okay AND!!! they Talk to me!!!!! my mom’s a really loud talker and tends to talk over people and one time the aunty asked me smthg and i andwered but Mother interrupted me and started talking to her and after my mum finished the aunty said ‘yk i didnt get to hear what [REDACTED] said’ and i went *happey* and repeated what i said AND!!!!!!! BOTH THE UNCLE N AUNTY ALWAYS TRY AND MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT W ME WHEN WERE TALKING JUST sdvsksveks * h a p p e y * like they legit would turn their bodies/crane their necks just !!!!!!!!!!! makes me so so happy!!!

okay and the aunty is SUCH a good artist (low key look up to her???) and like my mum sent her a pic of the crow i drew and the aunty literally said ‘ask [REDACTED] to make me one’ and just SHES asking M E ?????? (mother has been guilt tripping me over not making it yet but i have fucking tests i literally dont wanna ruin my mental health jesus) but yeah,, so sweet,,, and!!! if she seea me drawing she asks abt it and either offers me help/tells me what she liked abt it just *fuzzy* and!!! one day she called me n told me that she felt so close to me that she felt like if she knew i did smthg like morally bad she felt comfy with telling me off on it (and honestly???? thats so sweet???)

okay!!!!!! and the d a d!!!!! ahhhhh personally my brain links more w his bc like hes a very progressive thinker n he likes!!!!! world stuff!!!!! he always tells me how surprised he is by how ahead i am for my age/that hes like happy(?) that i think so ahead (which- s o f t-) and!!!!!! he sends my mum stuff n is like ‘i think [REDACTED] would be interested in this’ he actually was the one to give me les mis which is why i Really wish my brain would fixate on it so that i can ger through the boring beginning (bb hehe) but yeah and!!!! today (like an hour ish ago) he sent a video to my mum about this ted talk about the universe and how wack it is and!!!!!! WE HAD A CONVERSATION ABOUT IT!!!! the video was 20ish min long (i sent him 5 paragraphs after o watched it-) AND HE REPLIED!!!!!! and we had a convo :))) there was something i didn’t understand he said he’d explain it when they come over and just!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay AND the fact that he texted soo late??? like their family sleeps at 10-11ish and our convo ended at 12 (it wasn’t too like 15ish min) soo i am just a h !

[mrfutureboy]

I would like to know when you started drawing and where your passion for fanart started 😊

Oh FUCK dude i did not see this i’m so fucking sorry this is so late 😭 damn you, tumblr, for not fucking notifying me!! Anyway buckle up this is gonna be much longer than you asked for <3

Honestly ive kinda been drawing all my life! I hope that doesnt sound dumb cuz obviously almost everyone drew pictures when they were kids, but i know that it’s been a consistent hobby for me since i was little. By the time i was in 3rd grade I was hoarding notebooks to draw in. Cuz that’s something fun about me: i had a real huge habit of drawing in things that werent sketchbooks. Through middle school and beyond I did buy/receive sketchbooks, but I started out with various kinds of notebooks. One I had from like 2nd grade was like a hardcover, stationary-type notebook that I drew cats in lol, and I have 2 velvet lisa frank notebooks from 3rd grade. In high school and college I had a really bad habit of drawing in the margins on my notes and on handouts the teacher/professor would give. Those classes where the prof just prints out all the notes beforehand and gives them to you to follow along? Oh man, I spent so many classes barely listening while I drew on them! I also used to draw on my physics homework and tests and sometimes I even got extra credit for them (thank you jeff :D). I actually have a folder of various drawings I’ve kept from that 8yr time period and a lot of them are on classwork 😂

Obviously, I’ve been doing a lot of digital art lately, which I’m sure is what u were more curious about rather than the shit about drawing on my homework. I got a surface pro as a graduation gift in 2016 bc prior to that i had a wacom tablet and a janky ass laptop, so the gift was kinda a 2-in-1: i can do schoolwork AND art easily! i like digital art a lot and honestly im still learning new things abt it every time i draw. I use Leonardo currently (i’ll skip that story) but I started out doing digital art on sketchfu WITHOUT the wacom tablet in maaaaybe 2012??? 2011??? does anyone on this site remember sketchfu? Honestly couldnt even tell u how i found that site hahah the internet was just full of wonders back in the day. RIP sketchfu. Once i got the tablet tho some time later i used sketchfu still (i think) but also gimp and krita i believe.

Oh i suppose I should mention that i took art all four years of highschool and also minored in it in college! So it’s something i did academically as well as for fun. I keep thinking about going to art school for realsies but idk. I’m already $$$ in debt from my first degree i dont feel like adding to that 😅😓

Ok now for the second part of your question: I’ve also pretty much always done fan art! Ive never really been one for OC’s, EXCEPT for the self-insert superhero double life “comics” i wrote about a poodle named Sassy when i was in third grade. And then the knock off “comics” i wrote at a later time which honestly it was weird that i did a knock off of my own thing rather than just adding them to the original or making it a spin off with at least one of the og characters. Cuz it wasnt a spin off!! But anyway there wasnt really much to any of these characters; i just needed vessels to get my weird ideas out.

So anyway yeah most of what ive ever drawn has been fan art or self portraits, because its just easier for me to take characters that already exist and bend them to my will (artistically). Well excluding art assignments in school i guess because i would usually have to draw something specific and therefore not something self indulgent. But yeah ive drawn for lots of fandoms like the earliest i remember is warrior cats. Then theres things like pokemon and warriors and random other books i read thru middle school (i used to read a LOT but now im practically illiterate); spn, sherlock, and marvel through high school; and then marvel and bttf thru the end of hs and beyond. Idk i also have always loved looking at other peoples fan art and so im like “shit i wanna do that too!”. Tho i will say marvel was my biggest fandom and the one i had the longest interest in, so that was probably where the passion REALLY came from cuz I was drawing marvel stuff for such a long time (tho not posting shdjsk u have to trust me), but ive been doing fan art forever :)

(Of course, a lot of the fan art i was making prior to recently was drawn in lined notebooks or on homework sheets or what have you, and I wasn’t posting really any of it, but i was still making it and a good chunk of it still exists. Oh i should also mention most of it was with pencils or ballpoint pens like i wasnt doing anything too fancy. There was some digital art in the highschool-college time frame but it also really wasnt…much. Honestly i barely posted any of it here but I know some of it’s on deviantart)

I cant pinpoint the exact time I started getting more “serious” about my art in general, but i know the first pandemic lockdown gave me more free time and i was less stressed about schoolwork so i just kinda had a good outlet. (Tho i will say that prior, I had been in a life drawing club for a short while, and i had also been working on a personal sketchbook project that had me pretty ~inspired~ to do art. Also i watched twin peaks around this time and it inspired a lot of Feelings and i was making funky collages and other art pieced that were sometimes related to that. Some of those are on deviantart)

Honestly I think the Big thing with my digital art was coincidentally getting back into BTTF the summer of the 35th anniversary bc the fandom here was THRIVING and i was like “oh shit wait i want to contribute!” But as i kept drawing i kept wanting to improve and that leads us to right now where im constantly trying new things (whether subtle or obvious) and challenging myself to do full body drawings with different poses, and doing screencap redraws and what have you for various reasons (backgrounds, proportions, pose, etc)

So yeah :) Basically I’ve been doing fan art forever (I didnt even get into all the mediums ive tried but that’s another conversation bc this is already so long and convoluted) and it’s kinda coincidental that ive suddenly really gotten back into it and have improved dramatically in such a short time. Thank you so much @rovermcfly for the ask and again im really sorry you had to wait so long for a response! Stupid tumblr