#...Also not going to point out how Bill PROBABLY didn't even have to do all that to eat

[astro-b-o-y-d]

‘When Fiddleford went through the Portal during the test run, he saw Bill removing his exoskeleton to feed’

Cool and fucked up, but why didn’t Bill just come out of the portal then?

[babycharmander]

(BOOK OF BILL SPOILERS)

I just finished reading The Book of Bill and I am kindof losing my mind over some of this stuff.

I had wondered if Alex Hirsch might make Bill sympathetic in some way and oh boy I was not expecting him to do it so successfully (and without cheapening Bill's character).

So, we learn that Bill was born into a 2D world... as a mutant who can see into the third dimension. He claims he was absolutely loved by all, but when talking about his powers, he mentions under Pyrokinesis:

"Cipher, Cipher, he's insane / Starting fires with his brain." The kids in grade school could be so cruel. But where are they now, huh? WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

So probably not quite as liked as he was letting on. To add to that, there's the silly straw page, which looks like silly nonsense until you decipher some of the codes:

"EYE DOCTOR OF A DIFFERENT KIND / WHO WANTS TO MAKE HIS PATIENTS BLIND" "THE DOCTOR SAYS / THREE SIPS A DAY / WILL MAKE THE VISIONS / GO AWAY"

I wasn't sure what this meant until I saw someone point out... he was seeing a third dimension that no one else could see. His parents probably took him to the eye doctor to try to "fix" him. Which, speaking of his eye doctor, the coded message in the section about human eyeballs says something interesting:

"MY OPTOMETRIST NEVER SAW IT COMING"

It could be a joke given beforehand he's talking about dissecting a human eye, but given the previous hints of medical abuse, I wouldn't put it past him that he tried to get revenge on his eye doctor.

Oh yeah and the whole thing about him setting his entire dimension on fire? Yeah it turns out it was entirely a mistake (he just wanted everyone to understand the third dimension he was seeing so they could be free of only two dimensions), he was so traumatized by it he blacks out when trying to recall it. He deeply, deeply regrets it, and...

"What? Your ENTIRE home dimension? destroyed? How? By what?" Bill looked distant, more distant than I'd ever seen him. "By a monster."

He sees himself as a monster.

And yet, he's not some innocent, misunderstood being. He still revels in causing pain and chaos. He's terrible in general, but becomes incredibly abusive toward Ford.

"YOU'RE MY PROPERTY. DON'T FORGET IT. The hillbilly abandoned you, your father won't want you returning without millions, you have no friends, and if you died out here in the snow, who would even miss you?"

Which... speaking of him and Ford...

Yes, yes, I know people ship them. But like, whether you see their relationship as romantic or platonic (I see it as the latter), there's some interesting parallels to be made here.

Both Bill and Ford are mutants who were mocked for their being different. (Bill was not physically a mutant, as far as we know, but more in the sense of him having vision stronger than that of everyone else in his dimension, and also having special powers. And he does describe himself as a mutant.) Both became social outcasts, separated from their families but still haunted by them (Ford seeing commercials of Stan on TV and running across old photos of him and his brother, Bill being haunted by his family in some form). Neither could return home for one reason or another. Both more powerful than their peers (Ford intellectually, Bill in terms of actual powers). Both of them isolated and alone. (Yes, Bill does have the Henchmaniacs, but they seem like shallow friends, and only really seem to follow him out of a desire to have a place to party.)

Ford was not aware of most of this, aside from knowing that Bill could not go home because his dimension was destroyed. But Bill absolutely saw himself in Ford. There was no other person he tried to use whom he felt a stronger connection to.

And he actually seems to care about Ford--he actually gave him a birthday present, and when Ford didn't like it, he decided to get drunk and party with him instead to make up for it.

And then when Ford realizes what Bill's plan actually is and refuses to go along with it, and fights back no matter what Bill does, Bill completely breaks down.

After living for trillions of years, he met someone who was like him, and that person rejected him.

He goes berserk, wreaking havoc, being caught by the dimensional authority that he's been taunting for most of his life.

And then after dying and being cast out of hell for being too annoying, he winds up faced with the Axolotl, who sends him to therapy, where he continues to break down further, sending out the book in a desperate attempt to find someone, anyone who will help him break loose and wreak havoc once again.

"You have no friends, and if you died ... who would even miss you?"

I don't know, Bill. Who would even miss you?

In short,

[ID: The front and back of one of Bill's Valentines cards. On the front is a black void with Bill Cipher lying down without his hat, gazing blankly upwards, with the text "I DON'T WANT TO DIE ALONE" above him. On the back is a simple white "TO/FROM" in red, with a red outline illustration of Bill spontaneously growing a mouth and eating a realistic, bloody heart. /end ID]

[ckret2]

please more evil ford please i stare with my puppy eyes for this i am obbsessed

Yeah all right, I've been working on some art. (For context, we're talking about this Evil Ford.)

Evil Ford is Evil as in "cheerfully works with Bill even after learning his full plot" and "is totally ready to conquer and/or destroy the world." But other than the shocking lack of basic ethics and the supervillain objective he's mostly the same guy—which means he still cares about his family. He's hoping to get them to join in on the world conquest plan.

Forty-odd years ago he went off to college promising someday he'd be a big shot scientist who changes the world and he'd make his family a fortune. If taking over reality doesn't qualify he doesn't know what does. The family can join him and his buddy Bill and rule the universe together. Pines Pines Pines Pines!

Unfortunately for him, the rest of the family still has normal moral compasses. And also they've met Bill.

Bill can't currently possess Ford due to Reasons; but even though he can't get in the driver's seat he still has permission to ride shotgun at any time. Ford talks to him pretty regularly. He HAS been caught doing this. Stan thinks he's just gone a little nutty from thirty years of isolation.

Naturally, since he was always on Bill's side, Ford's perception of events during Weirdmageddon is a bit different:

I finally made an official Evil Ford New Costume Character Design, check out his exciting totally different brand new look:

I decided that, since Ford is still basically the same person aside from his terrible life goals, he'd probably have the same fashion sense. And so... nothing changes except two tiny details lmao.

But he DOES have tattoos:

I traced a canon character model and took off its top to get a base to slap tattoos on, and then went dang... they gave him a big head and arms. He looks goofy. Anyway,

His forearms have less incriminating tattoos—just a birch tree and a sunrise. (The sunrise looks like the Journal 3 "The Muse Has Spoken" page.) The red text is the "triangulum entangulum" ritual; if anyone asks he'll go "it's uhh an ancient Sumerian poem about how great science is." It's not until he's topless that it's like "oh so he's a CULTIST cultist." The one exception is an unconcealed Eye of Providence on his right palm—but it's in an ink that's only visible in certain lighting. It's there so at any time he can point his hand at something and go "Bill are you seeing this BS?"

Of course, he still has the "hey now, you're an all star" neck tattoo. I didn't have room to draw it.

As you can see, he's made being Bill's right hand man a core part of his personality. Rather than spending 30 years scrabbling around the multiverse desperately searching for a way to destroy Bill, he spent 30 years chilling in the Quadrangle of Qonfusion as Bill's specialest favoritest Henchmaniac, and only scrabbling around the multiverse occasionally for fun & profit.

Here's a photo Bill & Ford took at a Nightmare Realm house party like fifteen years ago, three minutes before Bill started an argument and set the house on fire.

Most people have their wild party years in college, Ford has his in his 40s.

[itsjusthockey]

Hughes Your Daddy pt.2 - Jack Hugges

wow.

It took longer than expected, but you should all be thankful because I was going to quit this blog, but I didn't give up

tell me how proud you are and how much you love it. pls & thx

Anyway, enjoy ❤️

w.c: 2,754 (credit to gif maker) (don't steal my work)

The crisp 100-dollar bill you’ve just won sits nicely tucked in your back pocket as Jack breaks the world record for sprinting and dodging almost a million cameras to get to you. As soon as he crashes into your waiting arms, he lifts you into the air and lets out a breathy laugh in your ear that’s only reserved when you’re with him. It’s light, happy, and maybe even a little giddy.

After a moment of you being suspended in the air, he gently sets you down, giving you one last tight squeeze, then backs up to see your face.

“Did I embarrass you?”

You give him a slight smirk and shrug your shoulders. “You did okay.”

He playfully rolls his eyes, shaking his head at you as he moves on to hug his waiting parents. With his attention away from you, you survey the space and catch sight of the other Hughes brothers walking toward the group.

Luke is doing his little half smile and has a slight pep in his step that comes with a nice win, and Quinn looks about unbothered with everything as usual. You make a mental note of that, knowing that your evil boyfriend is going to push his buttons later to get any sort of reaction to his loss.

“Nice game, Lukey,” you pull him into a hug as he gets within distance, patting his arm as you pull away. “You’re kinda being a stud out there.”

Luke blushes a shade darker at your comment, and you can’t help but love knowing you can still get a rise out of him. Luke moves on, too, and you’re left facing the only Hughes brother who didn’t have a win tonight.

“Tough loss cap.” You hug Quinn tightly before glancing back at your boyfriend and leaning in slightly to whisper in his ear. “But we all know you’re still the best.”

Quinn gives you a small laugh, and you can see his head is held a little higher as you pull him to join the circle with the rest of the family. As soon as you do, Jack opens his smart mouth.

“Family circles are for winners only.”

As soon as the words leave his lips, Ellen hisses his name, and you pinch the back of his arm as hard as you can.

“Ow,” he yelps at you, rubbing his arm. “What was that for?”

You give him a look that tells him exactly what that was for, to which he rolls his eyes at you.

“He knows it’s in good fun,” Jack says. “Right Q?”

This time, Quinn rolls his eyes but nonetheless nods his head.

The group chats about the game for a couple of minutes before unanimously deciding that family dinner is a must, and then you’ll head back to Quinn’s place for one last night altogether. As soon as the decision is made, you beeline to follow when Jack holds you back for a second.

“Dinner, just you and me, okay?” He all but pleads, pulling you toward him.

You glance back at his family walking away, seemingly unaware you two fell behind.

“They want to see you too, J.”

He grabs your hands and pulls even closer, leaving no room for any personal space. “They don’t care that much, and I haven’t had a second alone with you.”

His point is fair, but you also are torn by the fact that it isn’t very often that all three brothers are together.

“C’mon (Y/N). The winner should get a reward dinner right?”

You raise your eyebrow at him. “Then shouldn’t we invite Luke?”

He snorts at your comment and shakes his head.

“Please, I did the heavy lifting.”

Twenty minutes later, you’re at a nice restaurant in downtown Vancouver. It’s big yet cozy and has low lighting, making it slightly romantic. You’re impressed with Jack's pick, but you also know deep in your heart he probably asked Quinn for his recommendations.

Your reserved table is in a cozy little corner, and a bottle of wine is sitting out, ready to be poured. You’re beyond happy with the setup, but you can’t help but feel a little underdressed as you both walk toward your seats. Jack has his game-day suit, but you’re still clad in a red and black jersey with the number eighty-six plastered across the back.

“This is wonderful, J, but you couldn’t warn me to wear something a little nicer.”

He pulls out the chair for you before you sit down, and as he crosses to the seat directly opposite you, he laughs.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He smirks. “This is my favorite outfit for you to be in.”

You roll your eyes as far back as possible but let it go. You are proud to be his girlfriend, and you allow him to have this little ego boost for one evening.

You spend the next hour talking about everything and nothing, and when the bill comes, Jack hands over his card, and you two pack up the leftovers you have, knowing Luke will destroy them once you get back to the house.

Once the card returns, you head out into the chill Vancouver night with Jack's arms wrapped around your waist. The walk to the car is short and filled with your usual light banter. As soon as you're within the view of the car, you go to swat away Jack's arm when he gets a little too handsy, but not before your boyfriend reaches into your back pocket and pulls out the hundred dollar bill that was safely hidden.

He eyes the bill with curiosity and darts his eyes back and forth between you and the bill for a few seconds.

“What this?”

“Cash?” You deadpan, moving to snatch the bill away, but he holds it out of your grip.

“You never carry cash.” He narrows his eyes slightly, then a dawning look crosses his face.

“This is the fourth hundred I’ve found in your pocket after a game with my brothers.”

You give him a surprised look but shake your head no.

“It’s just a coincidence, Jack.”

He passes you back the bill, but let’s put a low whistle. “Twice is a coincidence. Four times is a pattern.”

Before you can open the passenger door to the car, Jack blocks his body with it, tilting his head to the side and eyeing you up and down.

“You wanna know how I think you’re getting the money?”

You let out a puff of air, wishing he’d drop it, but you also know your boyfriend, and he will never let it go.

“Sure.” You take a step closer to him. “Let’s hear your theory.”

He smirks again and leans toward you as if he’s going to tell you a secret.

“I think you’re betting with my dad.”

You freeze when he speaks and must admit he’s smarter than he looks. You want to deny the accusation, but you simply shrug your shoulders and lean away from him.

“An excellent theory, J, but alas, it’s none of your business.”

You meet his stare, lean into him to kiss him on the cheek, and then body-check him from the side, and he stumbles just enough to allow you to climb into the passenger seat.

He heads to the driver a second later, and when he climbs in, the conversation is merely forgotten. You go back into talking about everything you’ve missed in each other's lives until you pull into the familiar driveway.

The house is decently quiet when you walk in, and when you round into the dining room, you see Luke and Quinn on opposite sides of the table, a checkerboard between them. Luke is stressed, chewing slightly on his hand, and across from him, Quinn sits with a smug smile and a stack of chips next to him.

“C'mon Lu, you’re better than this.” You say, gently patting his shoulder as you bring the leftovers to the fridge.

He huffs and glares at Quinn. “I am better, and I think he’s cheating somehow.”

Jack pipes up from behind you. “How can you cheat at checkers?”

Luke huffs again and mutters a quiet “he’s finding a way” under his breath, returning his attention to the board.

Jack crosses the room and sits down next to Luke, saying he’s playing the next round to defeat Quinn for the second time that night, and as soon as he takes his attention off you, you beeline to the living room in hopes of finding your gambling partner.

You find Jim and Ellen in the living room, and when you enter, they’re beyond excited to see you. You sit on the opposite chair and lean over to them both, whispering so the boy in the other room won’t hear you.

“Jack is onto us.”

Jim gives you a confused look.

“He knows about the betting.”

Ellen lets a giant laugh bubble past her lips, and soon enough, you’re all laughing about the situation.

“Out of all of them to figure it out,” Jim says, shaking his head.

You smile at them both, telling them how the secret came out, and in the end, they shrug it off.

“Just because he knows doesn’t mean we should stop. If anything, maybe it will be more of an incentive.”

You smile ear to ear and relax back into the chair, knowing that the little game won’t end, even if the boys know about it. You settle back into casual conversation for a while before you hear some commotion from the dining room, and Ellen gives you a knowing look.

You walk swiftly back into the dining where the chaos is, and when you enter, you see Quinn sitting calmly with his arms crossed and Jack standing in front of him, surrounded by all the tiny checker pieces with the board flipped upside down.

You can’t stifle your laughter, and you high-five Quinn across the table as Jack turns to you with a cold stare.

“You two can laugh all you want. I still won the actual game tonight.”

Quinn shrugs his shoulders at Jack. “Well, I just won the game that clearly matters more. So who’s the real winner tonight.”

Quinn throws you a wink as he begins cleaning up the pieces on the floor, and Jack follows suit, angrily putting them into the little pouch they came in.

You watch them clean up the game and go to stand by Luke, who’s eating your leftovers and quietly watching the scene unfold in front of him.

“Did you just stand here the whole time?” You ask.

He takes another large bite. “I enjoyed the show.”

You knock your shoulder against him, and a few minutes later, all the games are put away, and you all decide to join the parents in the living room. There, you watch a few episodes of The Office under Jack's hold, and soon enough, you find yourself dozing off in the comfortable position and extra body heat.

You're not sure how long you're asleep until you wake up hearing some shuffling around you. You open your eyes and see that Ellen and Jim have already left, and Luke and Quinn are moving around, getting ready also to leave the shared space. Quinn folds up a blanket and places it on the couch when you quietly whisper at him.

“Is he asleep?” You ask, referring to the boy behind you who’s gripped has softened a bit and whose breath has gone steady.

Quinn nods and whispers back a goodnight, leaving you and Jack alone in the living room. You’re perfectly content to stay on the coach, but that doesn’t last until you feel Jack move behind you.

“What time is it?” He mutters.

You look around for your phone, and when you click on the screen, it reads about half an hour before midnight. You show him the screen, and he hums.

“Wanna go to bed?”

You nod, slinging your legs to the side and getting up. Your muscles are stiff, and you stretch them out as Jack follows close behind you to the shared bedroom you've been occupying this weekend.

As you are busy getting ready for bed, Jack joins you in your domestic bliss, washing your face together and brushing your teeth. You can’t help but smile into the toothpaste because every time you go to stare at him, he’s already looking at you, and a blush creeps into his cheeks when he gets caught.

You finish up, climbing into your pajamas, and when you walk back into the room, Jack is already under the covers, looking at his phone. As soon as he notices you, he tosses the device away and lifts the sheets, patting the space beside him.

You crawl in, and within a moment, his arms wrap securely around you, and you’re pulled to his chest. All the stress of finals, flying back and forth, and life in general melt away, and for the first time in a long while, you know you’ll get the best sleep tonight.

You settle in even deeper into Jack's hold, reading yourself to enter the dreamland until you’re slightly brought back when he gently taps your arm three times, your relationship code to see if you’re still awake.

“Yeah?” You ask, flipping over to face him in the darkness.

“I just have a question.” He whispers

You wait for him to ask, and after a second passes, he does.

“Of course, I’m not mad or anything. You betting with my dad is the funniest thing ever. But one thing is bugging me.”

You gently rub his arm, and he continues.

“How did you win?” His voice is soft. “Did you bet on us winning even though we haven’t been playing the best? Or was it something else? Do you switch teams? Or how do you decide which team you bet on?”

He throws so many questions at you that you silence him with a light kiss pressed to his lips. It effectively shuts him up, and he stays quiet until you answer.

You take a minute to speak on purpose, wanting to make him wait, but you know that his wheels are turning, and he honestly doesn’t know your secret to success, and you know you have to tell him.

It’s never a question when you’re betting with Jim; you always pick with your heart, and you’re rarely wrong, and even when you are, you’re still correct with the outcome, and you wouldn’t change it for the world.

“I never have to decide.” You press another kiss to his lips. “I always bet on you.”

[luvyeni]

❛DON'T FUCK YOUR ROOMMATE❜ (h. renjun)

p. roommate!renjun x fem!reader w. 1.6k

warnings? kitchen sex , unprotected sex , pinning , masturbation , dirty talk ,

— 𖦹 ( you really shouldn't fuck your roomate , but he's making really hard ) !

"ow!" you hissed the butter from the pot , popping up , hitting your exposed skin. "stupid fucking butter." you cursed ,grabbing the pancake mix that you had already made , pouring it into the box.

normally you'd sleep in until about 12 on your day off , but you felt compelled to get up and be productive , so you decided to make breakfast for you and your roommate , who was still in his room sleeping.

you and renjun had came in contact with each other when your bestfriend told you he was looking for a roommate to help with the bills , and you were desperately trying to move out of your parents house. he was clean and he didn't ask for much , and all honesty you probably would've even if he was dirty and asked you to do everything — you were that desperate.

he was also nice , when he came home from work — which you weren't sure what he did , but you didn't question it , he'd bring you food , and he let you shower first so you'd get enough hot water , and he was overall a good person.

"maybe i should go wake him." you said , turning around , yelping in shock that he was standing in front of you , too close to be exact , his nose brushing up against him. "good morning princess."

one thing he did that you didn't necessarily hate , but it also didn't help your heart — he was flirty , not even a little , like to the point where he'd leave you breathless in some situations with the things he said. "are you cooking me breakfast?" you nodded. "f-for both of us."

you turned around , which didn't make it better because his frontside was now pressed against your backside , his morning wood pressed up against your ass , and you knew he was aware of it , you could see he's smirk out the corner of your eye.

"so sweet of you princess." he rested his chin on your shoulder blade — to anyone this would look like a couple sharing a sweet moment in the morning. "maybe i should give you a reward for being so good to me." but you and him weren't even dating , you haven't even hooked up.

he chuckled pulling away from you. "jesus (name) , you always get so flustered , im just joking." he sat down in the chair , while you gathered all the thoughts , taking the last pancake out , putting it on the plate.

"here." you placed in down in front of him. "thank you love." you sat down with your food , digging into the fluffy pancakes.

you were eating silently when he spoke up. "what are you doing today?" you shrugged. "it's my day off , so probably just stay home and clean , do some grocery shopping." you finished off your food , grabbing his empty plate. "that's cute." he smiled , toying with his lip ring that he one day came home with. "you're like my own cute little housewife." jesus he was on ten today.

"w-what are you doing today?" you said putting the dishes in the sink , turning the water on. "it's my day off too , some friends are coming over , we'll probably just drink and hang out , jaemin does smoke pot so i hope that doesn't bother you." you nodded. "it's fine , i'll pick up some beers and snacks at the market."

he stood up , making his way over to you , coming up to you like before , caging you in between his body and the sink. "here." he took the sponge out if your hand. "i'll do it , as a payback for breakfast princess , how about you just go get ready for the day." he released you from his trap , laughing as he watched you scurry away.

you closed the door , feeling like you could finally breathe. "why does he keep doing this." you whined , the feeling between your legs almost unbearable as you gathered your things for your shower , including your vibrator.

"oh fuck" you bit your lip , to contain your moans , moving the vibrator against your clit. this is how you often spent your showers , having renjun around all the time and him acting like this , you often got yourself off in the shower so he wouldn't hear you. "fuck im cumming!" you whispered , your body finally calming down.

you quickly finished up your shower , stepping out , wrapping your towel around your body. "shit." you cursed , you'd left your underwear sitting on the bed. "how does one do that?" you questioned , grabbing your clothes , opening the door , ready to make a run for it , your room was just down the hall.

you were too caught up in trying to get into your room , that you bumped straight into something — more like someone. "why are you in such a rush love?"

he lowered his eyes , taking in what you were wearing , smirking. "you wearing this for me princess?" you held on to your towel , holding your vibrator behind your back so he wouldn't notice , but that just made him even more curious. "whatcha hiding princess?"

"n-nothing." you tried to move forward , but he just blocked your way. "i know you're lying." he walked closer , so you stepped back. "i-i'm not , i swear." you cluthed the tool in your hand , backing up some more , letting out a oof as you hit the wall. "you've trapped yourself princess."

he went to reach for your hand , smirking. "you can try and stop me , but that just means you're towel will fall." he grabbed your wrist. "i would love to see what's under this towel , but we both know you don't want that." he pulled your hand from behind your back. "oh?"

your face burned with embarrassment , he was gonna bring this up every single day now , you wanted to crawl into a hole and die. "i hope you had fun love." he let you go just like that , walking back to his room , you quickly finished the walk to your room.

"(name)?" you did dare turn around , scared of what he would say. "if you ever want to feel good the right way my room is right down the hall." your breath hitched. "i'm sure i can get you off way better than that stupid toy."

you quickly shut the door , quickly fanning yourself , before sitting down to get yourself ready for your day of errands.

renjun shut the door to his room , locking the door , groaning silently. "fuck." his cock straining against his pajama pants. "why'd she have to be wearing that?" he palmed himself , sighing. "fuck that's why she was taking so long?" he freed his cock from the prison of his pants , stroking himself. "oh fuck."

he imagined what you were doing in the shower , getting yourself off. he bit down on his fist , so you wouldn't hear him moaning , or so he wouldn't slip up and say your name like he'd done it before , but when you confronted him about it , he covered it up with a lie.

he squeezed the tip of his cock , his thighs shaking as white droplets spurted from his tip. "sh-shit." he sighed , cum covering his hand , he grimaced , grabbing a tissue. after discarding it , he grabbed his things , ready to do his daily routine for the day.

you heard the shower , quietly peeking out of the room , to make sure he really was in there , before grabbing your things , leaving out of the apartment.

after the emotionally draining trip to supermarket , you were finally home , putting the password to apartment door in , walking in sitting the bags down , not noticing the group of people sitting in your livingroom. "(name)?" you looked up , finally realizing.

"you're back?" renjun asked. "mmhm." you nodded picking up the bags. "do you need help?" a voice from behind you said , you turned around , facing the boy. "i'm mark." he was handsome , and helpful. "oh , thank you."

he helped you put everything away , you grabbed the beers and the snacks , making your way to the livingroom. "(name) , these are my friends i was telling you about , that's mark , jeno , jaemin and— donghyuck." the boy interjected. "but everyone calls me haechan."

"nice to meet everyone , i bought beer and snacks for you guys." you sat it on the table , opening the cand handing them out to everyone. "pretty and caring." renjun glared at the boy. "yah , lee haechan." he warned. "im just saying." you chuckled. "we're just about to watch the game." jaemin said. "you can stay watch if you want if you want."

"(name) , you staying?" renjun asked , he didn't want you to , he didn't even want them to look at you. "im sorry , not tonight." he smiled to himself. "i really just want to take a shower and take a nap." you said. "next time then." jeno said you nodded. "next time."

you turned to walk away , when renjun stopped you , surely he wouldn't do this in front of his friends. "don't take to long this time." he smirked , your eyes widened , before you scurried off to your room.

he chuckled , turning back to his friends. "you lucky fucking bastard." haechan said. "what are you talking about?" he rolled his eyes. "you're fucking her aren't you?" mark slapped his friend for his crudeness. "haechan stop."

"no im not fucking her." although he wish he was. "so you're just living with a girl that hot?" haechan kept going. "so she's single?" he took a sip of beer , sitting it back down. "cause if she's single , i need her number like now."

he didn't know why he was upset , you guys weren't dating , yet he was about to rip haechan's head off for even bringing it up. "i'll be damned if i come home to you fucking my roommate , knowing you it probably wouldn't even be in her room , more like the kitchen table." he grumbled , bitterly taking another sip of beer.

"alright everybody out." you heard renjun yell about 5 hours later. "all of you are sober enough to get home , and someone can drag haechan home , go." you heard a bunch of shuffling and whining. "(name) , bye bye!" you heard haechan slurring , making you laugh , he was seriously a character. "shut up and go."

you waiting for the door to close , making your way out of the room. "he's funny." he closed the door , sighing. "yeah , you say that now , you try know him for 7 years , that will change." you smiled , looking at the mess they left. "i'm sorry , i'll clean it."

"it's fine , i don't mind." you began to pick up all the can , taking them to the sink to wash them out so you can trash them. "so helpful." he said coming up behind you. "so pretty." he whispered , close enough to smell the beer he was drinking.

"re-renjun." you stuttered , the cold metal of his lip ring against your neck. "don't fight it love , you knew it was bound to happen soon." you sighed as he left little kisses down your neck , his hands roaming around your body. "i didn't forget about earlier." he darkly chuckled.

he lifted up to the shirt you were wearing , sneaking his hands into your sleep shorts. "did it feel good?" he rubbed your clit through your panties. "were you thinking about what happened during breakfast?"

you whimpered , you definitely shouldn't be doing this with him. "answer me love." he pressed down on your bud. "did you make yourself cum to the thought of me fucking you against the kitchen sink." you nodded , moaning. "fu-fuck renjun yes , please , i need more."

he pulled your panties to the side , stuffing you full of his fingers. "shit." you moaned as he thrusted his fingers in and of your hole. "f-feels so good." he hummed. "yeah?" flicking your clit. "told you i could make you feel so much better than that vibrator."

it felt so wrong , but at the same time so right , he was so skilled with his fingers , he had you cumming in no time , but you still wanted more. "fuck renjun , pl-please , need you to fuck me."

he pulled your short and underwear down , along with his pants , freeing his cock from his underwear , bending you over the sink "such a pretty little cunt." he rubbed himself against your folds. "can't wait to fill it with my seed." he pushed himself inside you. "fu-fuck such a tight cunt." he wasted no time , thrusting into your hole. "renjun!"

he was rough , but you liked it , panting in your ear. "so many times i thought about fucking you." he groaned. "jerking off to the thought of -fuck- you screaming my name."

you were gripping the sink , his name and a mixture of curse words flowing out of your mouth like a waterfall , your roommate was truly fucking you dumb. "you're mine now." he grunted , hitting that spot. "only i get to fuck you like this , my little slut."

you moaned , clenching around his length. "fuck keep clenching and im gonna cum." you did it again. "oh fuck." he stilled his hips , cumming inside of you , triggering your orgasm. "renjun!" you let a pornographic scream as you came , a white ring forming around the base of his cock as he fucked you both through your orgasms. "im gonna pull out now baby." he kissed your shoulder , slowly pulling out , you whimpered. "good girl." he praised. "you did so good."

"i couldn't have made it obvious enough that i wanted to fuck you." you both laid in his bed. "i don't just go around pressing my morning wood on random people." you laughed. "well you'd always played it as a joke." he nodded. "guess i shouldn't do that anymore." he climbing on top of you.

"i guess if i want to fuck you i should just go for it then huh?"

©️LUVYENI

[cowboyfromh3ll]

Hcs for how each of the boys to react to "I'm pregnant"?

Any of them that you want to write for :)

So excited

English not my first language. Sorry

Van Der Linde Gang's Boys' Reactions To "I'm pregnant" (And Eagle Flies)

Hehehe this was so cute and also I didn't edit this ❤️

Warnings: none

Arthur Morgan

He'd be so fucking happy

Probably in disbelief at first but oh my God he'd be overjoyed

Ask you if you're serious over and over

Once he's convinced he's gonna ask all these questions about your physical and mental wellbeing

Celebrates with you (whatever that entails wink wink)

In his elated haze he's gonna wanna ask all these questions about your future together as parents

Is aware the gang ain't the best place to raise a kid but he'll reassure you that you'll have the whole gangs support

John Marston

Oh god

Let's just say he wouldn't be the most elated parent 😭💀

He's already got Jack and now he needs to take care of another?

If this were a revelation that came earlier in the game he's gonna be very irresponsible but I feel like he wouldn't deny that the kid was his

So at that point he's sort of forced to actually give a damn about him

And believe me he'd try but he wouldn't be the best at it, would need guidance

If this came later in the game like epilogue he'd probably be WAY more happier.

Your lives are finally settled and you can afford to have a kid

He'd be the happiest and more supportive husband and dad

Still wouldn't be sure about all the ropes but he'd try

Dutch Van Der Linde

He'd be SO happy

Like genuinely he'd shower you with gifts and praise and reassurance

I feel like part of it would be a power thing for him because not only can he lead a gang, but now he can lead a family

Also some sort of weird power symbol for him. Idk how, but it is

Wouldn't let you lift a finger

Would probably keep you in his tent to rest 24/7 and only allows a few people (Grimshaw, Hosea) to see you

He's going to hope and pray it's a boy

Charles Smith

HE'D BE IN SO MUCH SHOCK AND FEEL SM HAPPINESS IT'D BE SO CUTE

You sorta have to repeat the news to him a few times for him to fully absorb it

Literally a dream of his to start a family one day so now that he has it he's ecstatic

Probably incentive to leave the gang though, doesn't want his child growing up in that environment

Would prefer if you sit back and rest but won't hold you back if you don't want to

Javier Escuella

This is cause to celebrate

Takes you into town on a date

Offers you massages, foot rubs, hand massages

Sings to you to calm you

Holds your hair when you throw up (true love)

Buys you clothes to accomodate to your changing body

Kieran Duffy

THE SWEETEST REACTION

I feel like he'd start crying

Asks to touch your belly and would speak to it

That night he'd fall asleep while holding it

Wakes up the next morning and remembers you're pregnant and his day is already off to an amazing start

Get drunk while celebrating it and he'd boast to everyone about how he's gonna be a dad

Sean Macguire

He'd say some stupid shit I already know it

Probably crack a sex joke

He's getting stupid, fucking drunk. I'm talking black out

He's probably gonna wanna celebrate if you catch my drift HAHAHA

He'd forget to be gentle sometimes out of excitement, like carrying you around and cheering

Refuses to let you do any work

In private I feel like he'd cry

Lenny Summers

He'd probably panic a bit at first

Ask all these questions about how you guys are gonna be parents and if you're even ready

Once the two of you talk through it a little more he'll calm down and his nerves turn to excitement

I'm assuming y'all would be real young so he'd seek for a lot of guidance in the others

Constantly asks you questions about what you want and need

Bill Williamson

He'd be so flustered and nervous

Probably in disbelief for a while and asks if you're serious

I wouldn't blame you for thinking he's upset with the news at first

But he just needs time to process how his life's about to change!

He becomes even more gentle with you, more than he already is

Will argue with Miss Grimshaw about letting you rest/lightening your work load

And let's be real, she would lower your work load but he'd insist it stops altogether

Micah Bell

He'd be in disbelief, but bad disbelief

That or the sleaziest reaction

I'm leaning more towards sleazy reaction

Talks about how he's gonna raise the bravest kid and he's constantly gonna reference to the kid as he because I'm convinced he wants a boy

Brags to the others

Don't get me wrong the gang's happy for you but the way Micah uses it as a point of elevation is IRRITATING

Hosea Matthews

He's the cutest like seriously

He'd be sooo happy

Probably in disbelief that he even managed to get you pregnant

I believe he'd cry, and openly, he's not ashamed! He's happy!

Announces it to the whole gang, means for celebration

Takes you on dates to buy cute little baby items ahhh

Eagle Flies

HE'D FREAK THE FUCK OUT

Pace around the room asking if you're for real, contemplates his entire life, curses himself for cumming inside

You'd have to calm him down and talk him through it

It'd be a super emotional moment for the two of you, eventually he'd realize he's fine with the idea of kids and he's just nervous!

Would ask his dad and a lot of tribe members for advice

Over time he'd get way more excited and bring up the topic more often

[appleblueberry-pie]

They usually show Gojo as the dominant one in the relationship, someone who is only with you for a while, but what if it were the other way around, if the reader took that role and Satoru couldn't get over what they did to him? ? (I think I need to stop imagining scenarios with this guy 😔)

Sorry, I Guess. Lol.

Satoru couldn't just ignore this feeling in his chest. It wasn't strong, but he really couldn't control it even if he wanted to. It was like a piece of metal was stuck in his chest and no matter how much he shifted or rubbed at that spot, the feeling wouldn't go away. And he only felt it when he was around you. That annoying feeling.

You always drove him around. Said that it would be a hassle waiting for him, when you knew he had a thing for always being late. And you always found him, even if his location was off on his phone. A mysterious one, you were. That's what he's supposed to do.

You drove with that left hand on the steering wheel and the other hand on the stick, a little smirk on your face. Almost half of the time that you two were together, he never had your full attention. There was always those few moments where you had to take(a very loud and exciting looking) phone call or just texting your little friends or whoever was making you smile like that.

You never had minded him. It was like he didn't matter that much.

You paid for his food too. He never liked it. He always had the money to pay for both of your plates, but you never ever settled for letting him pay for everything. You said you hated feeling like you owed someone. He told you a million times you don't owe him a dime but you always persisted. The most he ever got out of you was letting you two split the bill.

He hated you. Your personality. How he couldn't ever just have you. You weren't emotionally available. What was the point of dating you if he wasn't gonna have your damn time? It was a waste of his own, dammit, and he hated every second of it. But the more he tried to detach from you.....the more he realized he couldn't.

He really really liked you. He enjoyed your suave personality and effortless movements and charismatic energy that you poured into the conversations you had with him. He was the one that usually radiates energy in the friend group, but when he's around you, you seem to be able to dim him down and steal the spotlight. He can't ever take it back either. You're just that good.

He can't have you and he realizes that. He also realized that when you ghost him on all apps. When he tries to get back in touch but you block him for blowing up your line. He tries to get back in touch when he realizes you never told him anything about your personal life and it was extremely hard to find out where you worked or anything. And it was really hard to find where you lived when he realized you didn't even live in the city you took him all around.

You're probably a player, but he didn't care. He loves how you ignore him. Honestly, he wants you to do more damage, he wants to keep you around just to repeat what you two had again. He wants to see your face when you realize he's an actual weirdo stalker that's most likely obsessed with you.

You two never fucked and you made it clear with your body language that you never wanted him like that in the first place and he was just your decoration for a few weeks. But he didn't want to be like those temporary tattoos. He didn't wanna be henna either. He wanted to be painfully embedded in your skin for so long, that even though he might fade years later, that pigmentation on that one part in your skin will always stick around to tell the tale.

He just wants to be yours.

[anyydidi]

Okay, I might be crazy, or someone might have already pointed it out (after all, I am sighs a new fan), but hear me out on this.

Am I the only one who kinda compares the relationship between Gideon and Mabel to Billford?

I feel like they are the easiest way to show that you can agree that Billford is indeed canon, while still acknowledging all the terrible things Bill has done to Ford.

To be completely honest, my focus is more on the similarities between Gideon and Bill, than Mabel and Ford. I'm sure I could find some, but let's focus on the two that are more prominent.

Gideon is the perfect example when you want to point out that Bill has "loved" (in quotes, since people like Bill or Gideon (till Weirdmaggedon) aren't capable of real love) Ford even through all he has done to him in the past and in the present.

We know that since the introduction of Gideon, he had this incredible obsession with Mabel. Instantly he wanted her to be his and would go to great lengths to get her. He wasn't afraid to lie and manipulate. He wasn't afraid to hurt her through her own brother. When he didn't, in fact, get her for himself, he turned on her and her entire family. Now, his obsession stayed persistent. He still claimed to love her, even though he was ready and literally planning to rid her of her home and family. He prioritised his own selfish goals in obtaining the Mystery Shack and power, than her, well, welfare. He also wasn't opposed to physically hurting her on multiple occasions. Yes, he did always give her a chance to join him by his side, but the second she refused, he'd try to hurt her, or worse, just straight up kill her alongside her family. Remind you of someone?

The point I'm trying to make is that, while Billford is on a whole another level, these two relationships are kind of similiar. Dare I say parallels? I don't know.

The differences are that Mabel has never fallen for Gideon's flattery and did not take his bullshit, while Ford obviously has fallen and taken Bill's. Gideon at the end did switch up and redeem himself by finally seeing love for what it truly is and put Mabel over his own selfish wants, while Bill stayed on his path and was more content to torture Ford than give up his centuries-old plan to dominate the universe.

Bill might have adored in the past, probably still adored Ford in some way till his death, even though he was incredibly abusive towards him. The line between love and hate is incredibly thin, and can get mixed up on multiple occasions. Gideon hurt Mabel, while still claiming that he loved her and Bill probably did the same with Ford. For Bill, Ford was a plaything, a pet. But children can still care for their playthings and owners can care for their pets, while throwing them away in the end when they cross their path. Bill had tried to keep Ford by his side, but alas, Ford truly did not want his world to become a playground for an interdimensional being, so he crossed Bill's path. Bill had his priorities sorted, and his number one spot was taken by his dreams of domination, so he threw Ford away, which might have hurt a little (maybe even a lot, who knows), but he was still a meaning to an end.

So, this is my surprisingly long rant on how the people who claim that there is no way that Bill and Ford might have had something more intimate going on in the past, when Bill has hurt and wronged Ford on multiple occasions, do NOT understand toxic love!! And I am showing that through a strange relationship between children!

[shuenkio]

Juno | Lhs.

Paring: Heeseung X M!reader | Genre: Fluff.

Synopsis: Thought he'd be disgusted by your love letter however who knows what he actually feels toward you? When your friend accidentally puts that for fun note in your gift that you're about to give him?

Cw: Nothing.

Non proof read | Eng is not my 1st lang.

This is a work of fanfiction, do not throw unnecessary tantrums on this nsfw/sfw blog. ©Shuenkio

A@N: Christmas's laterally 3 more months away but who cares, I wanna make a change 💪 plus Juno are on repeating, so why not make an inspiration fic about it?

The Earth's spinning, people are living their lives in their own way, especially with their loved ones. You wonder, to the point of this age, should you just grow old as an old bachelor or find someone? Well, looking at yourself in the mirror already answers all your questions; you find yourself didn't match your satisfaction.

Insecure about your look wasn't enough; another thing is you've been hopeless romantic all of your life. Deep down, you wanted to have someone stay by your side, holding your hand while looking at the sky when it's sunset, cuddle when it's rain, compliment all the sweet things you've ever needed every day, and last but not least, you wanted someone to love you.

It's a silly daydreaming; however, every single day you can't go a day without thinking about anyone randomly popping out, riding their white horse, kneeling in front of you, and asking you, Would you be their partner? That's kind of crazy. Ever since then, brushed it all off as if it's nothing.

Continue to work hard for your bill in this messy industry. Surprisingly, God always has his own plan; he won't let you die alone... Right? Apparently, there's someone just moving in next to your apartment, and it's a man. Oh my. No, you can't be thrill just because he's a man; M/N, behave yourself.

That's how thirsty you are; later on, you thought you're the problem and started to behave yourself to be less attracted to a stranger, especially a man. On one holiday night, while back from work as you were unlocking your door, it was a coincidence when the new guy came out at the same time. Both of you never get the chance to greet each other because you're such workaholics. He greets you with a warm smile on his face, offering a handshake, as you hesitated to but still did.

He then introduces himself as 'Heeseung' called 'Evan' for short. He also said he never gets the opportunity to meet someone, mostly who are his neighbors since they are always out of the house just like you. For now, Evan wanted to invite you for a coffee. Oh. Spare a glance at his towering figure up and down; you realize he's positive; no bad energy from him; yes, you happily agree. A day turns into a week, a week turns into a month.

Trying all your hardest not to fall in love with Evan, who likes to do all those weird gestures that make your stomach fill with butterflies every damn time. Maybe you lack affection, sort of. He looks cool, is an ACE in everything, at least he can cook ramen, is a green flag in your perspective, is gentle and respectful of the boundaries, but one thing that made you stop midway was he can't be gay.

Evan is probably a straight guy that you mistake with his clingy behavior. Sigh, a lesson of life learned as a homosexual person. It's not right to force him to like you back, isn't it? Not even right to confess your true heart when he's so straight code, or he's not? Or is it worth pouring away all the heavy weight in your chest? The TV play in the living room, an announcement that today is going to be snow on this special day too, a Christmas day.

Brainstorming to seek out his favorite thing as you pop out an idea by gifting him a logo set; he loves it too much you couldn't understand why. As you were preparing the gift with all your friends together in a room before going out to celebrate in the city, you suddenly wanted to write a confession note for fun—write everything that had been living in your heart for a long time that has been hurting—a poem, to be honest, well, a little freaky, because you know you'd throw them away anyway.

"You make me want to make me fall in love."

"Wanted you to adore me back, hold me like you always did, and always joke, telling me I'm your only friend."

"Sorry, I like you, but I can't help it."  "Liking you was the best experience in my life, and I hope for nothing but still us to be friends."

Out of the blue, coincidentally, once you finish the note, your friend happens to pull you for a group photo. While you were busy posing, one of your other friends had nothing to do, so they went to wrap all the gifts of all of them. Usually, at every Christmas festival, they are in charge of who does the wrapping. The group united is over; after they're all stepping foot in the city, they've all vanished. Holding your gift like a lost child, looking at the crowd of people who's busy with their own business.

The snow keeps falling down from the blurry sky nonstop, so cold yet it fits the vibe you were going for. Snuggle your hands inside of your pocket; you leave the scenes as you drag your feet to somewhere quiet, your favorite park that used to be lively but now it's a field of snow. Taking a hot breath under the cold temperature, a shadow cast towering upon you, looking up to see, it was actually your greatest neighbors, Evan.

"What are you doing here, Fox?"

"Me? Oh, just chilling; I don't like crowds anyway." response, the tip of your nose turns pink, which makes Evan find it adorable.

"Why? It's Christmas; you should go enjoy yourself!" Taking about Christmas alarms your mind; you take out the wrapped gift and hand it to him. He caught off guard to the gift you have for him. Everyone would give him gifts during this festival; never make him flinch but you, a different story.

"Ugh, don't get the wrong idea; you're my neighbors after all; neighbors gift neighbors, isn't that normal? Take it, unbox it," take a hold of his palm, and give him the gift while waiting patiently for his expression. Hearing you say those, he did as told. Unveil all the tie, tearing all of the paper. Evan sees a cartoon Lego set inside with a small scratchy note that is about to be trash. The corner of Evan's lip, tight into a cocky smile as he takes out the small note, and hands up to the light street nearby. Maybe he didn't laugh at the Lego set but something else.

Seeing a note that you did not put in there and a confession note too, your eye wide open. The heart inside of your chest is pounding and racing far from the beat. You were nervous and panicking. How can it flow in there? Oh, wait, don't tell your friend to put it in there; naur, screw you. Quickly get up from your seat. I wanted to grab that note away; however, who are you kidding, he was 180 cm while you? A tiny little person.

"Evan, give that back; it's not; it's not the right note. My friend mistakenly put them there. DON'T READ IT." jumping up and down, up and down to snatch the piece of paper away, which is no use. All you got was to exhaust yourself.

"Oh, let me see, hmm, mistaken? But I see your name under here from me, M-N. How is that a mistake?" Realizing Evan already read it, you stop there frozen; the outcome would be something you are not going to like. Same goes for Evan too. You thought he'd be all serious and disgusted by your love note yet replaced by giggles. Um what?

"You, M/N, why have you not told me sooner?"

"Because... You look straight, i guess. Sorry to assume, but you did look like it."

"Oh, come on, why should I be straight when you're alive?"

"I beg pardon??"

"The word 'I like you' is out trending, so I'd say I. Adore. You, my M/N. My gift for you is

'i love you too'

🗣️ please mind my English! ><

🗣️ Crd to all the room rightful owner: [divider Alanitalenia]

🗣️ ps: I was dead ass sick writing this, but still cooked anyway 🫂.

[heartsoji]

falling in love with your roommate, suna rintaro

roommates to lovers

a/n: i haven't read the manga so i don't rly know anything abt rin's fam situation - sorry if any info is incorrect loll also this is more of like a college au?? idk if rin went to college but here it is

a/n pt. 2: i kinda switch between using rin and suna sorry

"rintaro!"

"what?"

"aren't you tired of living in my home, still? you're 21! i'm sure all of your friends have moved out already, right? most of them probably moved out at 18, but you haven't budged an inch!" mrs. suna scolded.

"yeah, yeah, pipe down, mom. i'll move out soon, i promise."

"no! it was fine that you stayed home for your freshman year of college, and i thought that you'd start being independent for your sophomore year, but you're still completely dependent on us! you don't cook, buy groceries, clean, or do any work around here! what are you going to do when you've graduated and you don't know how to run a washing machine?"

"yes, yes, i'm sorry."

"and i was very understanding of the fact that you didn't want to move into a dorm, but aren't you tired of commuting hours away when you could just get a closer apartment?"

"mhm, mhm."

she sighed. "rintaro, you know im only saying this because i care about you. i want you to be independent and strong, you know?"

"yep. i just booked an apartment tour via online."

"and i- huh?"

yeah.

soon after he decided the apartment was in good enough condition to be living in, he rented it out and moved in.

on his moving day, he met you.

"hi! you're.. suna rintaro, right? sorry i wasn't there on your tour day. i'm your new roommate, l/n! nice to meet you." you said, a friendly smile on your features.

stoically, suna replied, "good to meet you."

at first, you and suna kinda kept to yourselves. you were polite to each other, of course, but there wasn't much talking, only coexisting.

that is, until you discovered his grocery bills.

"$18... you've been surviving on $18?!" you looked at him in shock.

"yeah. is that weird?"

"damn right it is! what are you even buying?"

"well.. i don't know how to cook anything, so i mostly order door dash. my grocery bill is from instant ramen, chuppets, eggs, and milk."

you stare at him blankly.

"you've been eating nothing but door dash, instant ramen, candy, eggs, and milk for the past 2 months?"

"yeah."

this guy.

he just stands there awkwardly at you laugh at him.

from then on, you two become closer.

you taught him basic recipes to make using groceries you taught him to buy, (imagine his shock when his bill came out to be like $60.. and you were like "bro that's normal") you taught him how to use a washing machine, ("oh, so you put the detergent in this compartment..") etc. just basic household chores, but he was so impressed.

eventually, you two stopped being friendly roommates and just became friends.

he was a good listener. you'd rant to him about your problems, no matter how insignificant, and he'd listen to you carefully, and you never felt like your problems were stupid whenever you talked to him.

you two started hanging out a lot. you'd study together at cafes, go to amusement parks on weekends, and just chill at home together.

and as much as you hated to admit it, you had started developing feelings for your roomie.

i mean, how could you not? he was tall, handsome, kind, funny, cheeky, and it certainly helped that you got to see him all tired in the mornings.

you didn't really know if he felt the same way, but if he did, he was a real bitch, because at some point, your relationship became kind of flirty, and he'd give you butterflies on a daily basis.

you two would watch scary movies and he'd let you cling to him, giving your terrified features a teasey smile every now and then.

he'd walk around the apartment with his toned abs out, and his sweats dangerously low on his hips.

when you guys went on walks, he'd give you his hoodie if it got cold.

whenever you'd go on long rants, he'd just stare at your face with love in his eyes. "and then i-what is it, rin?" "nothing, pretty."

like sir you can't just do that. you're too handsome to do that without risk of heart explosion.

then, one day, unexpectedly, he popped the question.

you two were watching a cheesy romcom for the 5th time, sharing a pot of instant ramen, and at the same moment that the male lead said to the female lead, "i like you. a lot. i have for a while now," rin did too.

it wasn't grand.

it wasn't loud.

it wasn't annoying.

you weren't even sure if he meant it.

but when you saw him looking at you, nervous, awaiting a response, you knew he did.

so, at the same time the female lead said, "me too," you did too.

then, with the cheesy romantic music playing in the back, you guys gave each other cheesy smiles, and he planted a cheesy peck on your cheek.

it was subtle.

it was sweet.

it was cheesy.

it was familiar.

it was uncharacteristically romantic and sentimental.

it was just like how your future relationship with your roomie and best friend, suna rintaro, was going to be.

[sluttyenthusiast]

Taking What You Can Get

Patrick Zweig x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of affairs and having children + sad ☹️

(This is absolutely based off of my relationship from real life 🥲)

You loved Patrick, you really did, you had given him the past 8 years of you life, dropping everything to support him in his Tennis career. You had been his perfect housewife without being his wife. Everyone around you start to felt bad for you, your relationship was going nowhere, you told them it was fine but they complained that 8 years of dating was too much for a man who couldn't commit.

You remember the words that came from your closet friends, your friends since college, that you're doing too much of a wife without being treated as such. They knew Patrick, and deep down, you knew it wasn't right. He had been your first, and only boyfriend, and every part of him consumed you, there was no part in your life that he hadn't taken over.

He moved in with you, where you paid the bills and bought the groceries, where he essentially lounged around rent free and occasionally won a tennis match, but you were okay with it, you loved him, you really did.

You loved him so much that you couldn't find it in yourself to be mad at him when he cheated for the first time. If anything, you were angrier at yourself, not understanding why you couldn't be good enough for him.

It was simple in the terms that because of your lack of effort (or so you thought) in your relationship that made it turn to another woman.

Really though, could you blame him? He was probably getting bored, and you'd rather him be satisfied than unhappy with you, so you turned your head and let him continue on.

It continued for months, and it began to take a toll on you. At some point you found yourself confiding to your friends from college, about how you felt and wondered why he was with you for so long if you weren't good enough.

Art and Tashi assured you that you weren't the problem, it had everything to do with the grown man who hadn't matured past 19. Their words comforted you for a bit, and they couldn't help to feel bad, or at least Art.

Over the years you and Patrick had grown close with the married couple, often inviting them over to yours for dinner.

You had all been friends during college but had drifted apart, you were unknowingly the glue that held them together.

They were grateful for you, you always invited them over for home cooked meals and offered to watch their daughter. You just loved playing house for a little bit with Patrick, imagining a life with a child of your own.

You often found yourself in tears while laying in bed after Art and Tashi picked their daughter up, wishing for a life in which you were married with your own baby girl, maybe even a boy. Tears would flow down your cheeks as you watched Patrick's sleeping figure, listening to his breathing as you thought of the life you'll never have. You weren't getting any younger, and somehow, you held out hope, but you knew that Patrick didn't want children, so you didn't bother him with it, he also didn't want marriage, so you pushed everything you wanted aside and settled for what you could have, scared to lose the one good thing you had in your life.

Now you find yourself coming home, speaking out to Patrick about how you had gotten the groceries and planned to make the dinner he had requested. Your voice fell on deaf ears as the grunts and moans from the bedroom filled the house. You knew better than to intervene, so you sluggishly put groceries away, keeping your head down as you refused to cry.

Minutes had passed before you heard soft footsteps, not bothering to look up before you spoke.

"Hey Tashi,"

[braxlrose]

request: bill kaulitz x self-destruct reader hcs😌 I mean, she knows she's hurting herself but she doesn't care? doesn't sleep (and even if she does, she goes to bed very late and then gets up very late, so she's usually restless, tired and barely alive/ barely in touch with reality), barely eats (and even if she eats little , I drink too much energy drinks and takes tranquilizer pills), probably does sh and takes drugs (cigarettes, alcohol and drugs) and it all makes her look practically zombie but she likes this lifestyle?

cw: self harm, alcoholic tendencies, drugs, slight ED, toxic relationship, tons of angst, swearing, NOT PROOFREAD.

bill kaulitz x self-destruct reader

• when you two first met, it was at a party and you guys ended up sleeping together that night. you fell asleep right after so he ended up staying the night at your hotel room.

• when you woke up in the morning, you brushed your teeth and then went over to your drawer to get on new clothes when you felt hands on your hips.

• you turned around to see bill smiling at you. "Sooo, how long do I have to wait before I can ask you out on a date, hmm?" you rolled your eyes and pushed his hands away.

• "Uhmm, never? You don't wanna have to deal with my shit." you said as you pulled your jeans up.

• "Oh come on, everybody has shit."

• "Not like me. So, you should just go." you pulled on your shirt and turned back to him. He was just staring at you, smiling for God-knows-what. you had to admit, he looked amazing. he only had his boxers on, and he looked great shirtless.

• "I'll get you one day, y/n y/l/n." he smiled at you and pulled on his clothes. you rolled your eyes as he kissed you on the forehead and left.

• then you two met again at a music festival and that's when you finally decides to give him a chance after the hours of flirting he spent on you. you weren't scared though, you were sure he'd leave after he saw what you were really like. and you had accepted that.

That was a couple weeks ago. Bill became very aware of the "shit" you were talking about pretty quickly.

• whenever you were at a party with bill you'd always drink too much to the point where you couldn't see straight and your head was pounding like no tomorrow. Bill would take you back to your hotel room and lay you down on your bed and tuck you in. Then he'd sit with you until you finally fell asleep since he knew you'd just stay awake if he didnt.

• one night, you were completely wasted and he had to carry you back to your hotel. again.

"Mmm... Billy I want you soooo bad. pretty pleaaaasee?" you whispered in his ear, giggling and pouting as he unlocked your door and dragged you inside.

"You're drunk. That's not happening, okay?" He said, setting you down on your bed and beginning to wipe your makeup off.

"But Billy..." You'd whine and pout, while he'd just sit there and comb through your hair till you fell fast asleep.

"Goodnight, Schatzi." He'd whisper to you and place a kiss on your forehead.

• you'd also get angry a lot. you were in your hotel room, bawling your eyes out on the bathroom floor. It was 11 PM. your wrists were bleeding a bit from you scratching at them for so long, and your cheeks were bright red from the crying.

• you just wanted to sit there forever and wallow in your own self pity when you heard the door to your hotel open.

"Y/n! You in here?" Bill yelled to you, as you did your best to stand up and wipe your tears away. You gazed at your eyes in the mirror and there were streaks of mascara running down your face. You wiped them off your cheeks and opened the bathroom door to greet him.

"Hey! What're you doing here?" He turned around to see you but you saw his face drop.

"Are you okay? Were you crying in there?" He pointed to the bathroom. You scoffed and rolled your eyes as you closed the door. You pushed the inner part of your arms against yourself so he didn't notice.

"What? God no, I'm just tired. You should probably go." You said as you walked past him and started to change your clothes. He walked over to you and slightly grabbed your chin with his hand. He tilted his head at you and ran his fingers through your hair.

"Come on, just tell me what's wrong." You slapped his hand away and pulled on some shorts.

"I said I'm just fucking tired! Will you back the fuck off?!" You pushed him away and went to grab a new shirt to sleep him. He was bringing up emotions you didn't want to feel. You wiped away a couple tears when you felt his arms wrap around you. He placed some kisses on your shoulders and rubbed his cheek against you.

"I'm here for you, okay? Let me help you.." You could feel anger boiling up inside you. Your eye twitched. He's acting like you needed to be fixed or something. Why would he say shit like this?! You turned yourself around and pushed your hands against his shoulders trying to push his away.

"Can you get the fuck off of me! I don't need your fucking with anything just get the fuck away!" you yelled at him, tears pouring down your cheeks now. You slammed your hand against his shoulder trying to push him away.

"You don't need to push me away, y/n! It's okay!" He wrapped his arms tightly around you as more and more tears came flooding from you.

Your finger nails dug into his shoulders, harder and harder with every word. You could see him wincing in pain but he only hugged you tighter. Why would he want this?

• you hated that he stayed around. you didn't understand why he'd wanna be with someone like you? you set yourself on a path of destruction and ruined everything in your path, why would he take his chances like this?

• you were laying down in your bed when bill came around again. like before, tears were running down your cheeks and mascara was wiped all over your face but you were just laying there. not feeling anything. you had taken a couple different kinds of drugs so you were basically emotionless at this point.

• when bill walked in, he dropped everything and ran to your aid. he sat on the bed and cupped your cheek in his hand to make you look up at him.

• when you turned over at him, he couldn't see anything in your eyes. nothing. all you could remember is how sad you looked.

• he laid down next to you and wrapped his arms around you and kissed your shoulders.

"do you want me to stay?" He asked, brushing your hair off of your face and pulling you closer to his body.

you just nodded and laid down against the pillows as bill whispered sweet nothings in your ear and rubbed your sides with his hands.

• it was about a month into your relationship when bill realized how little you ate.

• at first, he just thought you didn't eat breakfast but over time he noticed you didn't really eat anything unless you were offered something.

• bill also took notice when all you ate was slim jims and energy drinks. Thats when he started bringing you food.

• in the mornings, he'd come in with breakfast and give you a little kiss on the forehead. "Wakey, wakey, baby." He'd say to you and place a bunch of little kisses on your face until you wake up.

"Mmm...what are you doing here?" You said to him groggily, wiping your eyes.

"I brought you breakfast. Come on, geeet up." He'd lift you up by your arms and place the food in front of you, then he'd sit down next to you and wrap his arms around you to make sure you're eating.

"I'm not hungry, Bill." You'd say to him, resting your cheek on his arm.

"Too bad, eat up." He would take your fork and cut into your waffle and place it in front of your mouth until you opened up to eat it.

You eventually would give up and just start eating.

"Why are you doing all of this? I'm just a burden, y'know?" You say to him with your mouth full and your eyes looking up at him all cute and widened.

" 'cause I like you. And I think you're cute." You rolled your eyes and continued eating but bill would have a big, fat smile on his face.

• during the day you'd be like a zombie. your eyes would be dull and half open. Big, dark circles under your eyes and you wouldn't do much. But bill didn't mind. He would lay down with you on the couch and give you massages and kisses on your temples to relax you.

• when bill found out that you hurt yourself, he kissed up and down your body for hours. Whether it was your arms or your thighs, he'd be kissing it. He told you how much he loved you and didn't want you to hurt yourself.

• he didn't want you to feel pressured about talking about your feelings but once you did he would just hold you and listen to you talk, getting everything out. and he would never judge you for anything.

• you told him that you'd stop hurting yourself and you did. for a few days. But that changed once you got away from bill for a little while and you got high at a club.

Bill wanted the best for you but you werent good for him. You knew that, you tried to change yourself for him because you loved him so much. But in the process of being with you, he got hurt too much. You tried to tell him, but he couldn't help but love you. In his eyes, you were perfect.

taglist: @hearts4kaulitz @burntb4bydoll @spelaelamela @bored0writer @fishinaband @billsleftnutt @tokiiohot @bluepoptartwithsprinkles @saumspam @5hyslv7 @killed-kiss @memog1rl @80s-tingz @billybabeskaulitz @victryzvv9 @banshailey

[unabashednightmarepizza]

𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑀𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑀𝑎𝑑𝑒 𝑈𝑠, 𝑈𝑠

A/N: I'll be completely honest, I don't know what I have written... But it's wholesome( i think) and cute. Curse me and my inability to write something short.

Prompts Used: I'll stay for as long as you need from this, do you think we'll be in love forever from this.

Summers in the Burrow was absolute trash.

Now it wasn't because Charlie didn't like to come back home and perhaps finally rest a bit. He actually liked being back home, especially with you now that you two were finally dating, he often took you out with him for hours after you stashed food in your back, knowing you two would be gone for a long time doing...

Snogging? Making-out? Flying?

It all depended on the mood.

All in all, he loved his family, he loved you, and he loved how well you fit with his family and love them as your own, they loved you in exchange just as much, and loved being back home even if it meant the teasings of his brother Bill who was the one witnessing his puppy love to you would increase with their other siblings' help.

But sometimes, the teasing was just... too much. And the fact that you also took after his family didn't help.

His own lover was against him, and they obviously loved making him go all red!

As if it was hard to begin with...

"It seems you are so smitten by me that you always talk about me to your family, Charlie~" you teased your boyfriend lightly as your hand wrapped around his, squeezing three times to silently say I love you, even though you were just making fun of him for talking about you a lot to his family, as he looked at you with burning cheeks and a soft smile.

"No? Where did you get it from?" He tried to hide his rants about you in a cool manner, to save himself from the teasing he would face even though he would melt as soon as you started planting kisses on his cheek, but ultimately failed when Bill and his dad, who adored you already, stumbled into the living room and beamed visibly at the sight of you sitting with his son.

"Y/N! It's lovely to see you, dear! How are you?" Arthur immediately pushed his two eldest sons aside and came to hug you, landing kisses on each of your cheeks as he proudly looked at you. Even to this day, after almost four years of being Charlie's friend and two years of dating him, you never quite got used to the way they always welcomed you warmly.

Molly hugging you, smelling like those cookies she always made. Arthur's warm hugs as he pulled you to his artefact room to show all the new cool muggle things he found, Fred and George telling you the newest pranks they thought about, playing wizard chess with Percy, making Ginny's hair in different styles and teaching them to her as she did your make-up, telling Ron about the latest school drama...

Sometimes, with all their flaws and all, you even thought that they actually loved you more than their own sons.

"Yeah, there goes our privilege as soon as they see their daughter..." Bill groaned as he rubbed his arm to soothe the pain of his greatest betrayal, done by none other than his father. Still, Bill was someone who always found a way to tease you or mostly Charlie and this time wasn't any different as he saw how you both smiled shyly, quite cute in his eyes, as you both stumbled over your words, blushing madly.

"I-I'm not their daughter Bill, I think you are-"

"Yet, my friend, yet."

"Bill, stop teasing..." Charlie gritted out, hoping it was enough to make him back off but instead Bill laughed and merely brushed it off.

"You look like a squirrel when you are angry, Charlie~ Besides, by the amount of adoring talk you had been doing since your second year at Hogwarts, I thought you would have already used a promise ring type of commitment!"

Charlie's face was a tomato at this point, even his neck and probably his chest was all red from the embrassment he felt. He always told you that it was a bad idea to spend the summer with his family, solely for the reason that he knew they wouldn't stop teasing him, and often suggested the idea of spending it in Hogwarts, alone, with you in a flirty way.

In which you always replied, I don't want to be on the receiving end of one of Molly's angry Howlers, Charlie... We have to go, besides, what's the worst that could happen? They love me!

But, that was the point.

They loved you so much, even more than possibly their own children!

And they wouldn't dare to tease you, no.

They took greater satisfication from doing that to him. Especially since he accidently let it slip that he wanted to marry you after graduation.

"What? Don't tell me... Holy shit, you never told them about your affinity with them since the day school started?!" Bill dramatically screeched with a hand over his chest at his brother's state, Percy rolling his eyes at the three of you as you tilted your head confused.

"Wait... Really? He had been talking about me?"

"Of course! I don't think he stopped doing it even after you two started dating! If not, it increased even more!" Percy yelled from the other room, making Charlie look there angrily, not aware of the soft and loving eyes you were sending to his way.

"Yes, I remember him talking about you at every breakfast, so much so that both me and Molly knew what flower you liked and memorized your schedule!" Arthur added with a happy nod from the kitchen as he helped Molly with the plates. Charlie turned his head so swiftly that you were worried he hurt his neck as he was left staring with a gaped mouth at his father.

"Dad!"

"Oh, yes, I remember now! I wasn't very pleased to hear that Y/N thought gnomes were cute... but she accepted they could be dreadful too!" Molly came from the kitchen as she gave you her famous pancakes with a smile and affectionate pat on your head as her eyes found Arthur's playfully.

"I still remember how your dad came bursting in, yelling that he finally found someone who shared his fascination with Muggle world and even gave him a record player."

"I'm gonna go and de-gnome the garden, maybe that will-" Charlie suddenly got up and turned towards the door to get out and probably cool his flaming face, while you giggled uncontrollably alongside Ginny who was having the best time of her life at her brother's misery.

"We can send your precious, curse-breaking lover if you want!" A yell came from the other room.

"Fred!" Charlie turned angrily to scold his brother when he saw the disappointed eyes of his brother.

"I'm not Fred, seriously first mum and now you, Charlie?" George, actually Fred, came from the other room, looking sad and half-angry.

Which was all a ploy, and even you knew it at this point.

But Charlie never was able to tell which twin was which one, and this was no different. He huffed out angrily as he muttered a whatever, and walked right towards the garden as you and twins looked after him with straight eyes and then slowly smirked.

"You are never gonna get tired of tricking him, right?" You threw your head back on the couch and looked at the twins with a cheeky smile as they laughed and shook their heads.

"Never~"

"So... You know we," Fred pointed to all the other Weasley siblings, except Bill and Charlie, to a pouting Ginny and Ron, who were doing their best to use their puppy eyes. " are here for a reason, and that is-"

"To hear more of my adventures in any kind so that you could find a humiliating moment to tease Charlie later?" You quirked an eyebrow curiously as they all stared at you in wonder.

"That's why she is the best older sister possible..." Ron and Ginny exclaimed with amazement with breathless sighs, making you laugh as Fred and George nodded their heads impressed.

"She is finally a true Weasley. Understanding what we exactly want is of high value."

" Suck it up, guys, you made it very obvious! Besides, Charlie won't be happy about this!"

"Then why are you bringing snacks?" Percy stopped while bending over the table in the living room under everyone's curious and amused stares, mumbling to himself as he flushed.

"Because... I want to hear them too."

"Hell yeah, that's my brother! Now, Y/N, you have no other choice than telling us!" Fred exclaimed as he threw a proud arm around Percy's shoulder and ushered everyone to sit down so that you could finally start. You looked at all the kids sitting down in front of you, waiting for you to start with excited eyes. Seeing them so eager, even though it wasn't unusual for them whenever you came to the Burrow, and they had other motives, made you crack a smile and nod.

You could actually give what they want to them with this story, and watch as Charlie suffers from their hands on your behalf.

"Now, where should I begin... Perhaps the accident with Squawk is a good one."

Squawk was on loose, the reputation of the Dragon Club was at stake and there was no way you could find that little rascal in time.

Without help.

"I want Squawk back in our care just as much as you do, Y/N! I'll help you find him, you don't have to worry when you have me!"

As soon as the last part left his lips, Charlie already slapped his forehead mentally when he met Liz's questioning and "are you serious?" look. He couldn't help how he felt or what he did, especially when his crush came to ask for his help. He had been watching you as discreetly as possible, throwing himself in to help you whenever you ask and he always sat with you at lunch and cracked jokes in hopes that you would smile.

You did, every time, because how could you not? He was being extremely cute and adorable!

But to Liz, and pretty much every single one of your friends, all these longing stares and shy smiles was becoming a lot harder to bear.

"Hate to break the cute moment, but we have a mission to finish and an Incendio to cast! Pump the love brakes and do it now Y/N~"

Actually remembering where you were and with who you were, you flushed but did it anyways and set the fake eggs on fire to lure Squawk to where you three were waiting.

And soon, he showed up and circled around the eggs protectively, making all three of you to cheer.

"Nice one, mate!" Liz's eyes were as wide as saucers when the word mate left Charlie and he was left freaked out with his hand still up in the air.

No... No, I didn't just call my crush "mate"...

Your eyes were also wide open at what he said, but you tried not to show how it made you disappointed as you smiled and let out a hey, which didn't really had the usual hype.

Mate... That's all he is ever going to see me as.

But amongst that chaos and freaking out, and Charlie's yell, Squawk was already gone, having flought away in fright.

Charlie, since he was kind of the reason Squawk got away, had a sheepish yet half-horrified look on his face as he looked at you, expecting anything except the kind and happy smile you had given him.

"W-what... Are you not angry at me?"

"No? Why would I be?" You tilted your head with a small smile as Charlie gulped nervously.

Oops, you were actually angry but... somehow, it felt like it wasn't about this accident?

"Because Squawk is... gone?"

You sighed, rubbing the back of your neck. It was no use for you to hold grudge against him just because he called you his mate and you had to fall for him. "It's like you said, Charlie. As long as I have you, I have nothing to worry about... Besides I'm confident in where he might have flied off..."

The rest of your sentence was a blur as Charlie widened his eyes and his heart literally stopped at what you said. Yes, he was the one who actually said it but to hear your crush also agree on it...

You just said the sweetest thing possible to him and he... called you his mate.

Tonk was his mate, not you! What the hell was wrong with him?!

"It's rather sweet what you said about Charlie, Y/N but one, stop being all lovey-dovey since some of us are single," she walked away while groaning, leaving you two behind blushing madly as she soon turned back and looked over at her shoulder with a cheeky smile.

"And two, please have a date already after we catch Squawk. I have a bet going on with Andre and I intend to win it, if possible." With that, she left you two to yourself and went inside as you looked at Charlie nervously for him to say something, anything.

And even if his heart threatened to get out of his chest at how close you two were, he smiled and looked into your eyes that reflected all of your emotions.

And it made him blush even more, when he found the clear adoration in there.

"Should we get started then?" He extended his hand out shakily and smiled when you grabbed it thightly and made him run after you with a happy laugh, thinking to yourself as you both ran.

Unaware of how he was watching your hair dance in the wind.

He is lucky he is cute, or else I wouldn't be running after him...

Everyone was left shocked at how stupidly oblivious their older brother, whom they all loved and even idolized, could be. A silence settled after you finished the story and you anxiously looked at them since... they were just looking at you with open mouths, even Percy wasn't saying anything except gulping down the chips he was eating.

But soon, Ginny's screech cut the silence perfectly.

"Wait... MY BROTHER REALLY CALLED YOU 'MATE'?! Ughhh, boys are so stupid..." she rested her back against the table with a hmph, crossing her arms in front of her chest angrily. If the situation wasn't comedic, you could have pinched her cheeks and agree with her, even if you were dating that oblivious and stupid boy that was her brother.

"How many boys have you ever seen, Ginny?" Ron pushed her shoulder, in a way quite offended as she sticked her tongue out.

"I live with 6 of them, I think it's enough!"

"Pretending that our sister didn't just roast all of us," George pointedly said as he slowly pushed the two youngests away with a sheepish look, and looked at you with a smirk.

"Our brother really called his crush 'mate' huh? Interesting..." he rubbed his chin as if he had a long beard which made you snort and nod at him.

They were so going to use this against him.

"Yeah, he did. And according to our friends, he banged his head at every possible surface whenever he remembered that but... it was kind of cute, how he lost track of what he says around me." You cutely said, a stupid smile over your face as the boys made a disgusted face while Ginny let out an awe. You slapped the back of their heads softly as you snickered. "Don't make that face now! I will see you when you fall in love~"

"Wait, wait! Was there a confession? Was it romantic or stupid as he first acted with you?" Ginny suddenly asked excitedly, bouncing up and down with a wide smile as she hugged her legs closer to herself, waiting for your answer.

"Ughh girls and their obsession over romance..." Ron groaned, making a face as if he was disgusted but you knew deep down that he was also into them, especially the one you had with his brother.

He would rather die than accept it though.

"Well, there definetly was some, Ginny. But... At first it was just us complaining about the other to our best friends."

Your chest felt heavy remembering Rowan, how you two used to stay up late while giggling to yourselves. It was mostly them, making fun of you as you blushed and hid yourself under your pillow after you confessed your crush to them.

But what are best friends for? Making fun of you when you need their help, and then offer their biggest one.

"I don't even know what's going anymore, Rowan! I just can't get Charlie out of my mind, every time I look at him, my stomach feels weird, I start to sweat and my heart feels like it's gonna burst out and scream... That bitch and him making me feel like that."

Rowan giggled as she patted your back while you vented, offering their comfort while you laid over their lap. You were trully sick, sick of feeling like this, because deep down, you knew the reason.

You knew why it all happened around Charlie but refused to acknowledge them.

There was a difference between knowing and accepting it, right?

"And... And as if it's not enough, I saw him half-naked!" Rowan choked on the air as they looked down at you in fright.

"You didn't start big, right?!"

"What the hell?! No, of course not! Look at me Rowan! Do you see me as that kind of person? If I was, I wouldn't be patheatically venting to my best friend!"

You got up from their lap as Rowan nodded, saying a fair point, and watched you plop down sadly before you crawled next to them and put your head on their shoulder. Rowan knew what was exactly coming and sighed as they pulled one of the napkin from their nightsand and offered it to you with an "are you serious?" look.

"He was... just so hot, Rowan."

" I know, it's normal for you to say that."

"I can't believe I fell for a dragon boy, whose only interest would be them."

Now that got their attention. Because, there was no way in hell you didn't realize the obvious favouritism he had for you... Right?

But by the patheatic pouting on your face, yes you didn't realize a thing.

"You really don't realize, do you?" They chuckled amused as they pat your head while they fixed their glasses. You lifted your head curiously and frowned at their question. "Realize what?"

"Charlie literally only talks to you about his favourite things, you included, and you listen to him talk for hours about dragons. He gives you the Snitch whenever he catches it when you come to his matches, which is usually always, and even gave you his sweater when you were cold... THE Weasley sweater, if I may add. Everyone knows he and Bill cares about it a lot, Charlie more than Bill."

As they talked, every single interaction passed through your eyes.

Even the ones no one really knew about.

The picnics near the Black Lake, hanging out after curfew, exploring the castle together...

Watching the stars together as you rambled about them, not realizing how close you two were suddenly. His wood and pine smell, a result of him always hanging out in the forest, suddenly filling your insides as your flowery yet quite light and neutral smell dazed Charlie and made him lean down closer to your lips... Them being apart by just mere inches as you both felt the other's breath, a craving, a lust and want so deep that it made you both almost tumble down and dive deep in the feelings...

You were down bad.

"And then he falls asleep on you, you fall asleep on him, you read to him, you always bring something for him from back home and he blushes every time you do that, he brings you his mother's cookies that she made for you, under his request and begs... Friends to lovers trope at its best really."

"Rowan..."

"Hmm?" They turned their head to you after they stopped listing everything, hearing your disturbed and anxious voice brought them back to the moment and- Holy shit, were you scared?

"Y/N? Are you oka-"

"I'm in love with Charlie." You said breathless but it seemed Rowan didn't quite catch the heavy meaning of your words.

"Oh well, congrats for realiz- Wait, not even like?! Like love love?

A shy nod of confirmation, and then a happy squeal.

"Oh My Merlin, I'm so happy for you! Now, you just need to say it to him-and no trust me, he feels the same, if not even more! There is no giving up for us now!"

"Then of course, he confessed to me... After making me cry because I had a crush on him-" you shrugged your shoulders noncholantly after you told them how you came to conclusion that you loved Charlie, and at that point, they were all so invested in your story that they didn't realize their brother standing at the corner and watching, listening to them with both a stupid and sorry look.

A/N: You may read my other work "First Date Shenanigans" for some referances.

Until that is, Fred understood the end of your sentence first and an angry scowl came to his face, making him look scarier.

"HE MADE YOU CRY?! THAT FRICKING TWAT, PERCY BRING THE BAT-"

"ON IT!"

"NO, FRED, DON'T-It was a misunderstanding!" You stopped them hurriedly as Percy immediately stood up and almost made a run for it, both young boys looking at you with wide eyes as they slowly blinked.

"What? How could there be a misunderstanding?"

"I wasn't very open with who my crush was," you shyly smiled and helped them sit back down, chuckling at their cuteness and how protective they were of you.

It made you feel... like a part of the family.

"Since everyone was suddenly so interested in my love life, which was a result of them knowing your brother's big crush on me, I never told anything about who he was."

"Yeah, we remember that Snape Accident... Douchebag."

"Ginevra Weasley, language!" Both you and her giggled as he came closer to you and laid her head on your thigh, your hand finding her ginger hair as you slowly started making a little braid.

"Soooo... What did he do when he learnt you had a crush on 'someone else'?" Ron emphasised pointedly with his fingers and waited for an answer, with a look he hoped that didn't give his big curiosity.

"Well, before that happened, he literally offered to duel me to take my mind off things... Now, I'm thinking that he did it for himself."

"Look, I know we will chat, but what will we chat about? What if we run out of things to say? What if we can't find something to talk about?" You anxiously looked at Charlie and Tonks, who was there to help you out with your date and couldn't help but get even more nervous after Tonks asked what you would do with him.

You never thought about that one.

What were you supposed to talk with Charlie, who was unaware that he was helping you with your crush who was actually him, so that you wouldn't ridicule yourself?

That is, if he accepted of course... Which was a low chance.

Seeing you spiralling into anxiety made Charlie sighed annoyed at his friend and turned to her with a pointed look. "See what you did, Tonks? Asking all those questions..."

" What? I was trying to help!" He shook his head at her innocent exclaim and gripped the bridge of his nose.

"Don't let your nerves get to you, love. Fight them off by... I don't know... Duelling one of us?" Charlie was already having a hard time looking at you, knowing that you liked someone else and was wondering what to do for a boy that definetly didn't deserve you, your love and attention at all.

Should he come after you to see the boy and later jinx him? Perhaps not... But he wanted to.

"That... would be good, Charlie. I'd like to duel you though, if you are not scared~" you teased him softly as your heart skipped a beat at his surprised wide eyes.

But unknown to you, Charlie was grateful that you didn't have any powers such as super hearing.

"Okay... But I won't make it easy..." he winked and looked at you through his lashes, possibly looking at you like that for the last time. He hoped he didn't look stupid, since Bill told him that flirting was definetly not his strongest feature, but by the snicker of Tonks...

Yes, he made himself a stupid.

"I think he went easy on me..." was what left your mouth after the session ended, rubbing your neck awkwardly but feeling refreshed. Charlie looked at you fondly for a second as he chuckled at your pouting face, shaking his head.

"No, I didn't..."

It wasn't that he would rather take Crucio than to see you get hurt...

"Yes, you did! I watched the whole time!" Tonk exclaimed cheekily with wiggling her brows as Charlie pushed her away from himself, already feeling himself blush again.

"%90 per cent of the time he was with you, it seems our brother only blushed..." Ron mumbled disappointedly, wondering how a boy like him could be rendered to a blushing, shy mess.

"MY BROTHER WAS SHY?! CHARLIE?! Are we talking about the same boy who reeks confidence in almost everything he does?"

"Well, Ginny darling, whether you believe it or not, he was really shy and couldn't look into my eyes after our first kiss. It even made me feel bad as if I pushed him but... Later I learnt why!"

"Then why was it?"

"You would know when you grow up..."

You couldn't just tell them that their brother thought about snogging you every chance he gets, from the moment he kissed you.

It would taint their precious innocence... Though you were starting to think that there was none.

"Just know that he turned it around very soon, and he was the confident boy he was in a few days."

Before you two dated, Charlie's hand always itched as if he wanted to touch you. And he did, he wanted that more than anything. Talking to you, praising you or even touching your hand simply seemed hard for him.

But as soon as you accepted him, all the things he wanted to do with you was easy. He kissed your cheek every day, called you his lover without a care, he touched you and hugged you freely as his longing finally was erased.

So, in short, a huge weight was lifted from his shoulders.

Even though you were the one who stopped them in the end.

He would always kiss you in front of people, not afraid of showing his love( definetly not because he knew some certain people liked you) and he would say, "What a good way to start my morning..." breathless as he stared at you with soft and loving eyes. He didn't care much about public attention or what others would say that much anyways.

To him, showing you his love was the least of the things he could do.

Especially when you never made him feel like an oddball, defended him even when he wasn't there, whenever he came to you to get help treating his injuries, you slept with him, cuddled with him, always beamed at him at the first sight of him walking to you, supported his dreams just as he always supported you and loved him unconditionally.

But he couldn't lie... All his affections were also to see your blushing face and embrassed face as you tried to look at anything but him, especially in the early days.

Remembering all the happy times you had with him, and all the times you had to get treat his wound after one of his "funny adventures" made you giddy all so suddenly. Because they were real, you weren't dreaming about them again, you actually went with it and was now currently sitting with his family, bonding together to prepare the biggest achievement of your life: Get back at Charlie for all the times he teased you restlessly.

But... Why not add Bill into this as well? He also took great happiness from watching it.

"But Charlie wasn't the only one I had power over. There were even days I made Bill do what I want him to do!"

"Really? Our brother? Like what?" Now all of their heads were turned to you, their eyes wide with excitement as the same cheeky smile before pulled up your lips.

"Yes, such as putting up decorations, preparing the Great Hall for the Celestial Ball and help me find a-"

"HE HELPED WITH THE CELESTIAL BALL?!"

"You are a natural leader, Bill, and I'm tiny compared to you. Inexperienced too. In many ways actually. So, as the good senior you are, I think you should help this cute friend of yours~"

"Okay, fine... Don't think you can rope me to hang the decorations though. I'll help you, and my job will be done."

Spoiler alert, it actually wasn't the end of his job.

"But even if he was the one who often helped us around with our problems, I would like to think that I too helped him on some ways.

Such as the time he stood up to Emily Tyler in the Ball.

"I realized I made a mistake...Would you like to give us another chance, Bill?"

Please say no, please say no, you are not that stupid Bill...

" Emily..." Bill said as he walked closer to her and stood before her, her batting lashes at him as he looked down at her. Meanwhile you were behind him, a mouth hang open in shock. Out of all the ways you wanted him to man up and face her, this wasn't what you planned.

"No way in the fucking hell..."

" Even if you were the last witch on the world, it wouldn't happen. You have been too rude to my friends, my best friend, and my brother and to me."

"Okay, that was impressive really..."

Ginny rolled her eyes at her brother and pushed them away, turning to you with her wide eyes as she wanted to hear the "love part" of your story with her brother.

"Was there a time Charlie saved you? From anyone?"

"Hmm... He often protected and defended me against Merula-"

"Oh, that bitch-"

"GEORGE WEASLEY!"

I swear Molly somehow always hear us... Maybe it's mum ears?

"Hello, Charlie! What are you doing here? It's not the class time yet?" He turned to look at you in surprise as his hands clasped behind his back and he greeted you back, perhaps a little bit more enthusiastic than he wanted.

"You know me, love, when I'm not playing Quidditch or bickering with Bill, I'm out exploring... And I can ask you the same, what are you doing here?" Your heart fluttered at the term of endearment he used, flushing a bit as you giggled at him. He leant over the boxes that held food for the creatures, trying to be all cool but he was anything but "cool".

Because, today would be the day, he was so sure of it! He would ask you out on a date, ace it with flying colors and finally have you to himself, all to love and kiss!

" If it isn't the two losers of Hogwarts..."

But not all plans went according to plan.

Charlie, hearing Merula's venomous voice, pulled you behind him as he stood before her, blocking you from her. He knew how you can kick asses, you did on him many times, and he also knew you always won against Merula and she was angry about that too. Merula, contrary to popular belief, wasn't that bad.

She was bad just... Not that much.

But still, he couldn't let her either do something to you or ruin his day by stopping him from asking you out.

" What do you want Merula?"

"Why do you even care, Charlie? I thought she hated me? She probably came here to insult me again."

"You're right. I don't care what you think most of the time, Y/L/N." At her usual snarky comment, you just rolled your eyes at her and turned to look at Charlie. Your eyes widened at how thight his jaw was and how his eyes could actually throw fire at her if that was possible, and a sudden burst of love and want threatened you to turn into a puddle at his protective side.

" I don't want to argue with you right now, Merula... Let's go somewhere else Charlie."

Suddenly, as if your words lightened a bulb in her mind, Merula gripped your wrist thightly, making you slightly wince as you turned around with angry eyes. "Where do you think you are going when you are talking to me?"

"The hell is your problem? Get the hell away from them!" Charlie pushed Merula away from you, making her stumble back in shock at seeing the Charlie Weasley who was ever the kind boy turn aggressive when someone threatened... you.

She chuckled at noticing what everyone has been talking about for the past few months.

Charlie Weasley was never like this, never raised a hand, never used his wand to fight another student....

Maybe, she could change that.

"Oh, Charlie Weasley, the shadow of his brother coming to rescue the day... It must be hard going to Hogwarts at the same time as your older brother... Watching him take over the stage, always be the talk,"

He scoffed at her obvious attempt of setting him off, but Charlie knew her and he wasn't about to get into her trap.

Her sharp eyes soon turned to you with a smirk. "Not that Y/L/N would know anything about that. Their brother is missing, probably dead."

But bringing you into this? That was her first mistake.

And also the biggest one.

Her words hurt, remembering all the suffering you had beared, all the while having to hear all the insults people threw at your dear brother...

But you couldn't show her that her words affected you, you just... couldn't.

But Charlie? Oh, hell no... He was going to make her pay for what she said, for hurting you.

"You never quit, do you, Merula? Why are you so angry at them after all these years anyways? Why are you still lashing out at someone who never did something?"

"If you are really the best witch at Hogwarts, why do you feel threatened by them? Why worry about what they are doing?"

Merula was shocked at the amount of anger Charlie had put in his words, backing her until she was far away from where you were. You were stuck on where you were for a second, your mind being unable to catch up to what was happening. But as soon as you did, you ran after Charlie and grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Charlie, it's not worth it. Let go-"

"Careful with the words, Weasley or else-"

"You, be careful with your words, Merula. I won't have you insulting my... friend. Don't get me started on your family issues if you want?"

Telling all of your story to them had been fun, it certainly made you appreciate your time with him and then his family. They were all eagerly listening while Molly and Arthur stayed behind and watched their kids silently listen to you, obediently, without making a voice or doing anything.

"We need to make them come over more often." said Molly with jolly yet slightly tearful eyes. Seeing her kids so happy and well made her emotional, just like it would do to many mothers.

Arthur hugged her closer and nodded, definetly not having any problems with you being around more. "I agree, dear. They fit in well... And I'll have a new artefact in my hands soon, I'm sure they will like it!"

In the end, after everyone was finally gathered around the living room, you seated yourself next to Charlie and hugged his arm closer to yourself, your chin on his shoulder as his warmth almost lulled you to sleep. He was dead tired, and also flustered from earlier. Apart from de-gnoming the whole garden with Bill, he came inside to look for you and how you were doing since you were so anxious before coming here.

But instead was met with you telling your story to his siblings with clear adoration and even he stayed to listen to you and your captivating voice as his heart swelled with love and pride.

"I loved listening to you talk about us... to my siblings. It was lovely." He muttered softly to you, not caring if his family heard him or not.

"Even if they use it against you?" You mumbled into his shoulder sleepily, lifting your head slowly to look at his shining eyes. He chuckled at seeing your usual teasing eyes even if you were tired after talking all day.

He knew his siblings after all, they must have asked a lot of questions.

"Yeah, even if they do that... It made me reminisce about the past years, and seeing you so cozy and happy with them... I just feel so happy, so lucky to have you." He brought a finger to your cheek as he slowly rubbed it, smiling when you nuzzled closer to him.

Normally, it wasn't like him to be so carefree with PDA but right now, he really didn't care. He might feel insecure from time to time, which happened seldomly, but as he sat with you next to him, thighs touching each other as your hand clutched his arm thightly, he knew he had nothing to worry about.

Even if he was blushing and his heart pounded at your sleepy face.

Because he never thought he would actually fall in love, he never thought his life would go to that part. He never imagined himself with a partner, going all the adventures with them. All his life, he thought he would stay single and had to tolerate his mother complain about his choice and beg him to find a partner.

But now?

He had his person, the one for him right between his arms.

"Do you think we will be in love forever?"

"I'll stay for as long as you need, Charlie... Being there and loving you."

And if that didn't prove his point, his previous talk with Bill in the garden and her mother bringing the famous "Weasley Sweater" did.

His mother didn't knit one for everyone after all.

"About my comment earlier... How did the ring shopping go?"

"Surprisingly well, brother... I think I found the ring." He pat his pocket two times to show his point and Bill smiled in a brotherly way and hugged him thightly, proudly.

In two years, there would be another addition to the huge Weasley family.

[ckret2]

Chapter 33 of human Bill is still the Mystery Shack's prisoner:

Stan takes Bill to get fillings from a creepy dentist in the back of a white van. And also they're handcuffed together the whole time.

Hijinks ensue.

Stan was startled from reading the paper by a shrill up-and-down whistle. Bill trotted into the kitchen, his voice a singsong lilt: "Incoming!"

Stan lowered the paper to glare at Bill. "Still doing that, are you?"

"Of course! I'd hate to scare you." Bill took the chair across the kitchen table from Stan. "Gooood morni—"

"Go away." Stan determinedly returned his attention to an article about the deathball arena construction.

Bill laughed. "You're funny. Anyway!" He noted Stan's plate of eggs and salsa was hidden behind his newspaper, and quietly slid the plate across the table as he spoke. "I need you to do me the teensy, tiniest little favor—"

"Nope."

"Take me to your dentist."

"No." Stan didn't even lower his newspaper. "The last time I took you anywhere, you almost made my niece cry, my brother left a Shopliftaholics Anonymous flier on my bed, and all I got out of it was a crummy ring. You wanna go somewhere, talk to Soos."

But, Bill noted, Stan was wearing said crummy ring. "Spend a day with that loser?" He rolled his eyes. "Please. I'd rather pry out my fingernails."

"You'd probably enjoy that, you freak."

"Not the point." Bill stuffed half an egg in his mouth. "Anyway, it has to be you. I need fillings, and Dr. Illing does them for free."

Stan squinted over the top of his newspaper. "How do you know about Dr. Illing?"

"What part of 'all-seeing eye' don't you get?"

Dr. Illing was a wandering dentist who spent the warm summer months in Gravity Falls. He squeezed his van and trailer into alleys between businesses in town, where he both lived and provided dental services until the police caught wind and chased him and his van out into the woods for a few days. On days with good weather, he'd pop open the back hatch of his nondescript trailer and set up a sign that read "COME INSIDE! FREE CANDY (for new patients)". He didn't attract many customers.

What really made him stand out was his unusual pay structure. He charged typical rates for regular teeth cleaning and dental maintenance; but if a patient had a cavity, he gave them a gold filling for free, and he paid them if he needed to pull their teeth.

Stan thought he was terrific. He hadn't had to pay for dental care in thirty years! Granted, he also wore dentures now; but hey, Dr. Illing had helped pay off Ford's mortgage, and at least the dentures were on the house.

Bill said, "You're the only one in the shack who knows all the places Illing might set up shop. Besides, he might be less jumpy in front of a stranger if an existing patient can vouch for it."

"I can see where you're coming from," Stan said. "But my answer is no, because I don't wanna."

Bill scowled in irritation. He sat back and ate another of Stan's eggs as he reconsidered his approach.

"Stanley—I'm a simple shape," he said. "A simple shape who's used to being coated peak to base in pure, lustrous, 24-karat gold. Having skin makes my skin crawl. I don't need any dental work done, these teeth are fine—but I'd really, really like just a bit of gold, somewhere on my body, so I feel a little more like myself in my final days."

Stan muttered, "You're trying to appeal to sympathy I don't have, Cipher."

"And then, once I'm dead," Bill went on, "I suppose I'll be leaving behind a corpse with a mouthful of free gold that whoever's disposing of my remains can do whatever they want with, do you catch my meaning Stanley?"

Stan lowered his newspaper just enough to grimace at Bill. "That's absolutely disgusting," he said. "But okay, I'm bribed!" He tried to fold the newspaper. "If you want your mouth to fund me and Ford's next year of globe-trotting, fine by me. Least you can do for messing up our summer."

"Mhm." Bill shoveled the last egg into his mouth while Stan was distracted by the paper and slid the plate over to Stan's side.

Stan slapped the paper down. "But we're not telling Ford about this. Agreed?" He offered a hand to shake.

"Agreed." Bill took Stan's hand, with the wrong hand—but before Stan could figure out what to do with that, Bill jerked his hand back like he'd been burned. "We'll take this to our graves."

"Or to your grave, anyway!" Stan laughed loudly, slapping the table.

Bill watched him with a forced smile. "Great. Deal made. Let's go get the magic friendship bracelets and—"

"Ohhh no," Stan said. "I'm not trusting a little bit of colored lace and some mystical hocus-pocus to keep you contained. If we're going anywhere, I'm making sure you can't escape."

"Okay," Bill said, a touch warily. "Fine. How?"

####

Soos took the handcuffs out of his toolbox, removed the key and stuck it in his pocket, and asked, "What side do you want it on?"

"Left," Stan said. "Gotta keep my punching arm free." Bill rolled his eyes. 

Soos closed the cuffs on Stan's left wrist and Bill's right, then tightened Bill's half until it actually held his tiny wrist. "There."

"Ha!" Stan grinned at Bill. "Try escaping that!"

"I wasn't planning to escape."

"Sure, pull the other one." Stan pointed toward the door. "Now... to the car!"

####

They stared in dismay at Stan's car.

The El Diablo was a classic of the 1960s American automotive industry—and it was in terrific condition. (Notwithstanding the recent dents, scrapes, and keyed scratches in the paint reading "TRICK-OR-CHEATER!!") It came with the features standard to American cars of the time, like a steering wheel on the left, and a wide front bench that provided space for multiple passengers to sit to the driver's right side.

Bill was handcuffed to Stan's left side.

"Wow. You're stupid," Bill said.

"I'll break your smart mouth."

"What do I care, we're headed to the dentist anyway." He sighed. "Okay! Let's go inside and tell Questiony how stupid you are."

Stan did not want to tell Soos how stupid he was. "No! How do you know I didn't do this on purpose? Maybe having my right arm free is more important than—er... driving."

Bill considered that with pursed lips. After a pause, he ventured, "Do you want me to drive—?"

"No, no, nope, I am not letting you drive my car, under any circumstances, ever! Not a chance!"

"Then how are we doing this?"

####

Stan gripped the steering wheel with both hands, knuckles white and jaw clenched.

Bill was uneasily cuddled up against Stan's right side. The handcuff forced him to stretch his right arm across Stan's chest. 

They were both wearing tank tops. Their bare upper arms were plastered together with sweat.

They were getting cricks in their necks from how far they were tilting their heads away from each other.

On the radio, a hit 50's soul song crooned romantically, "Oh, my sweet love... you're my lovely sweetie... and I never love you more, than when you're pressed to my side... as we go for a sweet loving car ride..." Neither of them could reach the radio dial without touching each other even more. They'd silently decided to pretend as hard as possible that they couldn't hear the radio.

"Welp," Stan said. "Out of all the times I've been handcuffed in a car, this is one of the worst."

####

They spotted Dr. Illing's "FREE CANDY" sign posted surreptitiously near the barrel and crate factory, and circled the block to park the car in front of a business that looked responsible enough to file a missing persons report if the car was still abandoned there by nightfall.

They tumbled out of the driver's side door with a maneuver that looked like a cross between a waltz and a mugging. Stan kicked the door shut. As they untangled themselves, in a surprisingly decent impression of Stan's voice, Bill said, "Gotta keep my punching arm free. How's that working out for you?"

"Bold words from a guy in punching range, you little—" As Stan finally separated himself from Bill and straightened out, he caught sight of Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland halfway up the block. "Oh, great. Cops. Exactly what you want around when you're doing something weird." Stan shook his head. "Well, as long as we go the other way and don't make eye contact—"

"Hi Darryl! Hi Edwin!" Bill stood on his toes and waved wildly. "Hey! Working hard or hardly working? Haha!"

"Oh, hey Goldie!" Durland waved back, and he and Blubs headed their direction. "How've you been, did you have a nice Summerween?"

"Ahh, I was stuck in the house—"

"Bill," Stan hissed. "Whaddaya think you're doing? Do you want them asking questions?"

"Hey," Durland said, "Why're you handcuffed to Stan?"

Bill turned toward Stan. He smiled at him. It was a smile that said I did not think this through.

"You need some help there?" Blubs asked. "I bet we've got a key that matches that handcuff model."

Stan bet Bill would love to accept that offer and go traipsing off with the cops. "Nope! That's fine! Thank you officers, but we're keeping the handcuffs on," Stan said. "Because." He paused. "They're necessary. For... uh... for me."

The cops and Bill watched him expectantly. Bill had that awful gleam in his eyes that he got when he saw an opportunity to make up a story.

"Because I'm old," Stan said. "It's to keep me from wandering into traffic."

Bill laughed, "Yep, that's true!" He jabbed Stan's shoulder with a finger (harder than necessary, he thought). "This guy's cataracts are so bad, sometimes he asks us if he's dying because all he a see is a white light in a dark tunnel! And the way his mind's going, woof—"

Stan growled, "All right you don't have to lay it on so thick—"

"—he's so addled it's like he's completely forgotten the last century of technology, he'll just walk right off the curb and expect the horse-drawn carriages to stop for him—"

"Hahaaa, but we won't bore you with my medical history!" Stan jerked on the handcuffs. "C'mon, Goldie, you're gonna make me late to my heart doctor appointment. You don't want my life on your hands, do you?"

Bill murmured, "Don't threaten me with a good time."

"Hold on," Blubs said. "You can't see? Didn't we just see you get out of the driver's seat of your car?"

Stan and Bill exchanged a look. Stan said, "Goldie's giving me directions."

"Oh! That makes sense," Durland said.

"All right," Blubs said, "We'll let you get to your doctor's appointment. You folks have a nice day."

As the cops left, Bill called after them, "You too! Hey, I'll see you guys at Rainbow Club!"

"See you there!" Durland turned to Blubs. "Y'know, I think Goldie's a step up from that seeing-eye bear."

Bill and Stan eyed each other. "All right, you're not bad at improv," Bill said. "I can respect a decent actor."

"You too," Stan said grudgingly. Bill looked at Stan like he expected a little more than that; but Stan kept his mouth shut. Bill didn't need the encouragement.

####

Dr. Illing's "FREE CANDY" sign leaned hopefully near a gap in the fence around an overgrown lot by the barrel factory. The gap was large enough that a reasonably limber human could duck through with little difficulty; however, Stan was old and Bill was still controlling his alien body like a rookie puppeteer learning the marionette, so they circled halfway around the lot until they found a gate in the fence to push open. They trod across scraggly grass, a row of dying mushrooms, and years-old litter to reach an unmarked white van hooked up to a camper trailer.

The back hatch of the trailer was flipped up to serve as a makeshift metal awning, and inside, a tall, spindly man was snoring atop a military cot in his underwear, using a white lab coat like a blanket. Stan cleared his throat loudly, and when that didn't disrupt the snoring, knocked on the side of the trailer. "Hey! Doc!"

Dr. Illing jolted upright with a yelp, seized an enormous wireless power drill off the floor to point at them like a gun, lowered it slightly as he registered he wasn't under attack, then realized he was nearly naked and yelped again. He tumbled off the cot, flailed his way to his feet, and turned his back to them as he jerked on his coat and buttoned it. "Just—just a second!" He got on one sock, couldn't find the other, and gave up, pulling on his sneakers with one bare foot. "Sorry, so sorry, I must've—just—nodded off for a second, there—"

"Maybe we should have made an appointment," Bill said wryly. "He looks busy." Stan snorted.

Dr. Illing turned around, smoothing out his rumpled lab coat. He was a jumpy, twitchy man with heavy circles under his eyes, short badly-cut hair, and a 5 o'clock shadow that had evolved into a 25 o'clock shadow. His gaze darted nervously between their faces. "Sorry. Hi, hello, can I help you? Are you maybe here for a tooth extraction, or—or perhaps wisdom teeth removal...?" His gaze caught on Stan's face, and he started. "Stan Pines! I haven't seen you since I pulled your last tooth ten years ago! What are you doing here?" His brows creased in worry. "You're—you're not mad about that, are you—?"

"What? No! The dentures are—fine. They're actually lower maintenance than teeth. Sort of. In a way," Stan said. "No, I'm here to refer a new customer." He pointed at Bill.

Bill made a gesture like he was tipping an invisible hat. "Hi there!"

"A customer?" Dr. Illing said blankly. "Oh—yes! Of course, hold on—" He pulled a hospital curtain over the front half of the trailer to hide a dinette covered in laundry and old magazines, lifted one end of the military cot and slid a step stool under the legs to keep it raised, and tugged the arm of a dental light down from the ceiling to aim it at the chair.

Stan said, "So, do I get some kind of referral bonus, or..."

"Oh—sure, sure. Have a, uhh..." Dr. Illing opened a heavy yellow and black tool bag, pulled out a battered cookie tin, withdrew a gold coin, and offered it to Stan. "One of these or something, here."

"Huh." Stan inspected it. No idea what currency it was, but a gold coin was arguably cooler than actual cash.

The dentist batted aside the hospital curtain to grab a tiny stool from the dinette, shook a damp towel off the seat, placed the stool beside the cot, and sat. "Okay!" He clapped his hands. "New customer! What can I do you for?"

Bill had been gazing in naked longing at the bag hiding the gold coins; but at the question, he looked up with a grin. "I'm here for fillings!"

"Ah! Wonderful. No charge for fillings, of course." He started rummaging through his tool bag for supplies. "Do you know which teeth need them?"

"Whichever you think would look best with some," Bill said. "Driller's choice!"

Dr. Illing stopped rummaging to give Bill a perplexed look. "I—sorry, come again?"

"I said I'm leaving it in your hands." Bill climbed into the trailer and put his free hand on Dr. Illing' s shoulder. "I'll be straight with you, Frankie: all that matters is that my teeth do not currently have any gold in them, and I want that to change by the time I leave. I'm not too picky about the details beyond that."

The dentist stared at Bill, then glanced at Stan for confirmation. Stan shrugged and nodded. "Oh-kay!" Dr. Illing wasn't quite smiling, but there was a strange, eager gleam in his eye. "Super! This'll be fun!" He gestured for Bill to sit on the cot. "Let's see what I have to work with."

He ushered Stan in, and pulled the trailer's hatch shut.

####

"Your teeth are amazing," Dr. Illing said, voice hushed with awe. "Perfectly white. Who's your usual dental hygienist? Did you just get these cleaned?"

"Nope," Bill said, forgetting for the third time that humans keep their teeth and their voice in the same hole and he shouldn't talk with the dentist's fingers in his mouth. Dr. Illing quickly pulled his hand back. "Just basic toothpaste, floss, and dish soap."

Dr. Illing shook his head in disbelief. "Well, they look amazing. And no wear at all, remarkable... Have you ever considered having any of these pulled? Do you mind if I take a few pictures?"

Stan shuddered as the dentist pulled out an old film camera and started snapping photos. "Yeesh. I forgot how creepy you are. Kinda glad I ran out of teeth."

Dr. Illing straightened up, snapped off the dental light, and sighed. "Well, I'm sorry to say that all your teeth are pristine. Not a hint of cavities—not even plaque. It'd be a shame to drill such pretty specimens. You're sure you don't want one pulled...?"

Stan grimaced, but Bill pursed his lips thoughtfully, as if he were considering a perfectly normal question. "As fun as that sounds, I said I want to leave with gold today, and the whole extraction-and-implantation process for gold teeth takes ages. Unless you happen to have a little secret magic trick to speed up the process?" Bill laughed, fixing Dr. Illing with a piercing stare.

Dr. Illing looked nervous. "Er—no."

"Then just the fillings. But who knows, maybe I'll feel naughty and be back in a couple of weeks." Bill laughed again. "Just pick a couple of your least favorite teeth to drill into!"

"Okay, suit yourself." Dr. Illing shrugged and fished around in an overstuffed cardboard box under the dinette table. "Let's gas you up and get drilling."

"You can skip the sedative," Bill said. "I don't mind a little pain. I prefer it, actually! It adds some zest to the experience..." He trailed off as he caught sight of the label on the gas canister Dr. Illing had pulled out. He pointed at a word, "I thought that additive was illegal."

Dr. Illing flinched guiltily. "Not in the state where I got it."

"Oh, buddy. I didn't realize I'd climbed into the party van!" Bill settled back on the cot, laced his hands behind his head, and got comfortable. "You know this stuff has something like sixty percent odds of causing hallucinations? Most people get either haloes around lights, or spiders. Go ahead, gas me—I wanna find out which I am."

####

In five minutes, Bill was overjoyed to report that the dental light had a spider halo. He did not explain what this meant.

Since Stan had typically been under anesthesia himself whenever Dr. Illing operated on him, this was the first time he'd had an opportunity to watch the dentist at work. Stan discovered that when Dr. Illing drilled into a tooth, he didn't suck the resultant dust up with one of those little dental vacuums with a plastic tube Stan was more familiar with. Instead, when a bit of dust had accumulated, he reached in with what looked like a cotton swab, wiped up the tooth dust, and scraped it off into a Petri dish; and only then did he use the vacuum to suck out any saliva and continue. Was he saving the leftover tooth dust? He was an even bigger creep than Stan had thought.

By all appearances, Bill didn't handle the gas well. It wasn't that it made him sick, or that he wasn't having the time of his life. It just made him completely forget how to operate a human body. When Dr. Illing told him to hold his mouth open, he also held his eyes open until they watered; and whenever he lost the battle to keep them open, he automatically shut his mouth too, often to his own peril as Dr. Illing shouted about the drill jostling. Within ten minutes, Dr. Illing had given up on convincing Bill to keep his mouth open and instead started giving him blink breaks when he could shut his mouth.

It helped some, but they couldn't do anything about the fact that Bill had fully forgotten he couldn't talk while getting dental work done, and kept up a regular chatter—during which he cheerfully mentioned he'd died recently, attempted to explain that the entire universe was actually an elaborate hologram projecting from the "true" third dimension, and asked Dr. Illing all about the cruise to Panama he'd recently stowed away on (which the dentist hadn't mentioned). During one blink break, as Bill closed each eye separately, Dr. Illing leaned toward Stan and muttered, "So... what's her story?"

Stan tilted his head toward the Petri dish. "What's with the tooth shavings?"

Dr. Illing considered that, slowly nodded, and got back to work.

####

After several hours, Dr. Illing wiped his brow and sighed in relief. "All right, that should do it. You've got fillings on five teeth now." Under his breath, he muttered, "It would have been two, if you hadn't kept talking while I was drilling."

Stan shook his head in amazement. "Doesn't that hurt?" 

"Yes," Bill said. "I've never felt pain like that before. What a rush."

"If you do come back for a tooth extraction, I'm getting a dental gag to keep your jaws open." Dr. Illing finished pulling out the array of clamps and barriers around the filling sites and wearily dropped down onto his stool. "There. The rest of the sedative should wear off gradually over the next few hours. Usually I tell patients to wait three or four hours before eating to let the swelling go down, but..." He waved wearily. "You can do whatever you want."

"Admit it, you like having an enthusiastic patient!" Bill heaved himself off the military cot, forgot he couldn't float, and immediately collapsed to the floor.

"Whoa there—" Stan helped Bill back to his feet. The handcuffs prevented him from getting an arm around Bill's back, so instead he helped keep him upright by firmly squeezing his upper arm. "I don't know about you, but I'm eating as soon as we get home. You made me miss lunch—and for some reason, I feel like I barely had any breakfast." Bill inexplicably found this declaration hilarious. Probably the sedative, Stan reasoned.

Bill waved at the dentist as Stan tugged him out the trailer's hatch, chattering the whole way: "Thanks for the gold, the sock you were looking for is a bookmark in the March issue of Floss Girls, Atlantis is rising as we speak, you have less than seven years to prepare for the plague, tell the little lady I said hi! Byyye!"

Stan squeezed Bill's arm tighter and muttered, "Would you cut that out?

Bill stumbled across the uneven lot. "I made up the part about Atlantis."

"Okay just shut up and stop saying weird things."

Bill attempted to walk sideways all the way back to the car.

####

Stan gripped the steering wheel so tightly, his arms were trembling.

Bill was sprawled all over the front bench, the dashboard, the seatback, and Stan's shoulders.

On the radio, a hit 80's R&B song with a sexy saxophone was playing, "Babe, the sad things you've been through... I swear I'll make it up to you... If it takes a thousand years..."

Bill was singing at the top of his lungs directly in Stan's ear, "I'LL WIPE AWAY ALL YOUR TEARS, WOO!—sax solo!—BA DA-DA DA, BA DA-DAAA—"

Stan turned off his right hearing aid.

Every once in a while Bill attempted to grab the steering wheel and turn it in time to the song, like a kid playing in a toy car; Stan had given up telling him to stop and instead started just smacking his hand away every time he tried. After another smack, Bill draped his arm awkwardly over Stan again, and announced, "I can't feel my tongue at all! I bet I can chew it off!"

"Don't do that."

"The last time my mouth was this numb, my girlfriend had just gotten done with me, haha." Bill stuck his finger in his mouth to experimentally poke at his tongue. "I couldn' thee for the nex' hour from all the thporeth—"

"I swear if you don't shut up—"

Bill flopped his arm across Stan again. "I just realized I haven't gotten any action since I died. Wow. What's normal for humans, couple times a week until you start the slow lingering decline toward death?" He looked straight at Stan. Stan could feel that side of his face start to sweat. "This isn't a weird time to bring that up, is it?"

"Bill, if you say one more weird thing, you're riding home on the roof of the car."

Bill was quiet for three seconds. And then he started poking Stan's bicep. "Your arm's a lot meatier than Sixer's! What's your favorite flavor of cancer?"

####

Mabel asked, "Why are you on top of the car?"

Bill—eyes wide, hair disheveled, one arm hanging through the driver's door, sprawled out clinging to the roof like his life depended on it—replied, "I don't know, it's all a blur."

Stan opened the car door and jerked on the handcuffs. "All right, get off my car."

Bill shakily climbed off, lay in the dirt, and tried to catch his breath. "That was fun. We should do that more often."

"Not on your life."

Eyeing the handcuffs, Dipper said, "What were you doing, anyway?"

"Nothing!" Stan snapped. "Why? Who's asking? I wasn't sneaking the demon out to get a shady back-alley dental procedure!"

Mabel and Dipper stared up at him.

Stan pointed at them. "What are you doing?"

"Going camping," Dipper said, turning so Stan could see his stuffed backpack.

"Something's been stealing Pacifica's alpacas at night, so we're going on a stake-out," Mabel said. "They took Giorgio. It's personal now."

"We think aliens might be abducting them," Dipper said.

From the ground, Bill said, "It's not aliens."

"Ah, taking the law into your own hands. It builds character," Stan said approvingly. "You need firearms?"

They exchanged a glance. "We're good," Mabel said. "Grunkle Ford loaned us his freeze ray. It seems less lethal."

As the kids headed toward the road, Bill finally heaved himself up. "Well, that was fun!"

"No it wasn't," Stan said.

"Your opinion doesn't matter. Anyway—" He shook his cuffed wrist. "We're home, get me out of this thing. It makes you look like my ugly accessory and I want my hoodie."

"I elevate your whole look!" Stan protested. "And I don't have the key, it's with Soos."

Mabel turned back to shout at them, "Soos is out! He's got a dinner date with Melody!"

Stan grimaced. "Uh-oh."

Bill shrugged and said, with a confidence Stan didn't share, "He left the key behind."

####

"Oh man, sorry dudes," Soos said over the phone. "I totally forgot I still had it. Yeah, it's on my key ring. Is that, like, gonna be a problem, or...?"

"It's fine," Bill said, sitting atop Soos's office desk and leaning all the way across it to reach the phone. "Just pass it through the phone, we'll catch it."

"What?"

"Ignore him." Stan shoved Bill's face away. Bill gave him a dirty look as he straightened out his eyepatch, which he'd finally gotten to put on once they were home. Stan spun the desk chair away from Bill so he couldn't try to join the conversation again. "He's hopped up on psychedelic laughing gas. When are you gonna be back?"

"Uh..." Soos thought for several seconds. "Nooot for a while. Abuelita and I were talking about maybe kind of staying the night?"

"Well—pfff—can't you duck out and bring the key?"

"Uhhh. I would but, this is the first time Abuelita and I are having dinner with Melody's parents, and I'm really worried about impressing them parents, and the casserole's about to come out, and I think they might judge me if I leave, it would probably ruin dinner..."

"Okay, fine. What if we drive over to get the key?"

Far louder than necessary, Bill asked, "Stanley can I drive this time—!"

"Absolutely not!"

"Oh sure, that'd be fine," Soos said. "I'll give you directions, Melody's parents' place is in Portland. You got a pen?"

Stan frowned. "Portland."

"Yep."

"As in, outside the magic bubble trapping Bill in town."

Soos paused. "Oh, right."

Well, Stan wasn't about to make Soos look bad in front of his future in-laws. He'd never had in-laws, but he'd seen enough sitcoms to know how messy that could get. "Never mind. We'll figure something out. You kids enjoy dinner." Stan hung up the phone, sighed, and turned to face Bill. (Bill had plucked a figurine of a bulky robot in a cute girly pose off of Soos's desk, and was staring at it in wonder, like he'd never seen overpriced anime convention merch before.) "You got any other bright ideas?"

"We could still call Darryl and Edwin..."

"No way," Stan snapped. "I am not calling the cops for help! Never gonna happen. I'd rather wait for Soos to get back in the morning if I have to!"

"Oh would you." Bill laughed scornfully. "And what do you plan to do until then?"

####

They got TV dinners and grumpily watched Cash Wheel together.

####

(This entire chapter was just an extended excuse to annoy Stan and Bill as much as possible. But mostly Stan. Thanks for reading, and if you enjoyed I'd appreciate a comment or reblog!!)

[heartofbusan]

While we're theorizing about AYS, may I leave this one with you?

THEORY: Before the shoot began, JM and JK had a chat about how they were going to approach it as entertainers. One of the items they agreed upon was that JM would film 'house tours' of wherever they stay the night and JK would film the food insert shots. We see JM film a trour of their camping tiny house, the air b&b in CT and the house in Jeju. The only time he films the food is at the omakase but honestly, what else was he supposed to do there? Lol. JK was very diligent in getting 'dynamic' food coverage everywhere.

They each had their own little responsibility and I'm just so endeared. Who knows if we'll ever find out the answer but I think it's cute.

If anyone isn't following along with @curio-queries AYS production breakdowns, please do so. They are so insightful!

Thank you for this ask 😙 I feel like it's part of a longer conversation about how AYS came to exist, which I'd love to have. We might get some more insight into the 'why and how' of it after all the episodes and behinds have aired. But because theorizing is part and parcel of being ARMY, I say: why wait, let's go!

Early in episode 3, there's this one off-hand comment JK makes to Tae about getting out the 'company card' to pay for their meal in Jeju. It was relatable as most of us have at some point gone to lunch or dinner on 'the boss's dime'. It also served as a reminder that the expenses of this trip are literally billed as 'work' for them. And as they took it upon themselves to embark on this show, task assignment comes with the territory. So yes, it makes sense for them to have agreed as to their part of 'the coverage' during pre-production. The coverage being the type of shots they were willing and able to film themselves. And mind you, them filming parts of it is not only another checkmark on the overall shotlist; a way for production to get close up's of their faces and inserts of their meals, but also a way to emotionally seat the audience inside their experiences. Seeing it all through their eyes. So it was a great production choice as well as a narrative one to have them film with the go-pro's.

I think that's part of why it's so funny to them. They literally arranged a paid vacation for themselves, lmao. That omakase, they needed those shots as receipts to justify that (surely extremely expensive) meal. Do we think Taehyung would have had his meal paid for by Jimin, or could they have written it off as a 'guest star' expense? 🤔

Another thing that filming with the go-pro's does is, literally, hand jikook the reigns of what they're willing to film/show.

A much discussed example is the morning scene inside the CT house. JK wakes up, turns on the camera in the hallway outside Jimin’s door, entering, the scene cutting to the camera inside, etc. There are scores of decisions that took place prior to that scene. The editing of it is doing nothing to make the timeline of events any clearer. But all those cameras would have had to be turned on prior to them 'waking up' in the reality of the show. Parsing all of those choices, including when crew is back inside the house once morning comes, will have to wait for another day (that is , if anyone even cares to know, lol).

The point I'm getting at is that while traveling, JK and JM have more control over what we're being shown than we even realize. As you stated in your blog, ITS did this a lot.

ITS would end right up until the tannies would have had to leave a place. Never showing the travel back, probably because emotionally, you want the audience to stay with the characters inside the happy bubble of the experience, not the slog of traveling home. Especially because there is no longer a story to work towards.

My question to you, do you think they 'woke up' together prior to turning on the cameras and putting on the microphones? Who turns off the cams and mics at night before they actually sleep?

I think you know as well as I do that we shouldn't forget that AYS is a story we're being shown. There is a production that has to takes place in order to make it, and there are two professionals who are working to show us these moments. But more importantly, there are two human beings who are also having 'off-camera' moments who decide what they're willing to include in this show.

Sometimes, the lines get blurred, but the intentionality of this show and the kind of relationship they're inviting us to observe is monumental, in my opinion.

[ampblamp]

AU: Here's How Billford Can Still Win

(part 1: make that triangle miserable)

tl;dr: i want bill to have his ability to live in denial about what he did shattered by several important figures from his past BEFORE he can enact weirdmageddon. this way the yaoi can be messy and toxic (at first) but NOT doomed. it's self indulgent for sure but i'm doin my best to keep it IC as i can 🫡

this first post is just me figuring out how i think things would have to go down on bill's end for billford to have any chance of working out. take my hand. come away with me to my autism world

i'm still figuring out all the details of what would have to change to like. weaken bill's mental defenses enough because he HAS been able to shove his guilt down for so long. i do think everything with ford would be one of the key factors cause he had never connected so much with any of his prior human partners and obviously things souring fucked him up enough to have a turbo breakdown. (i know it's also because of the amount of times the plan has failed but i think he's also feeling rejected by so many humans not liking him lolll)

i think his breakdown after getting wasted at o'sadley's would happen like in canon, save for its repercussions. once bill starts thinking about his mom and everyone else from euclydia around when he's about to be arrested, maybe it would open the door for thoughts of them to keep slipping through his defenses. and suddenly thinking about weirdmageddon and hearing himself and other people talking about it could have a chance of triggering him.

i know personally that trauma can jump in and completely drag you back in time regardless of any logic, and i think him having that kind of episode sooner might be the key to getting him to face that he doesn't want to keep repeating what he did to euclydia because it's never going to be enough to convince the small, small voice in his head saying 'stop'.

because that's just the thing. bill has forced himself down a path of destruction to Prove to himself that its actually for the best to tear down "miserable reality" and replace it with his own vision. his drive and impatience to get weirdmageddon going is BECAUSE he wants to permanently cement that narrative in his mind with the ultimate "proof". because if the narrative fails, not only will he not be able to mentally cope (without help) he'll completely fail the henchmaniacs, who he promised a new home, and look vulnerable and weak, which he's TRAINED them to view as what should be destroyed.

i think the o'sadley breakdown and my proposed worsened repercussions of it would destabilize him, but it wouldn't be enough to stop him. what would push bill over the edge in this hypothetical would be several powerful entities from bill's past like the axolotl, the oracle, and time baby working together to somehow target his mental weak point. cause remember, time baby canonically KNOWS bill's weak point.

also like. To Me. the axolotl and the oracle are people bill was close to and has seen himself in at one point* but they matured and he didn't, and that's why he's SO hostile towards them.

*the oracle being an ex-henchmaniac is canon but i say this about the axolotl because of xolotl. look him up, it'll freak your bean.

alsooooo... ford not being as immature and vengeful as bill hoped he was is probably why bill broke down so hard - because it reminded him of the axolotl and the oracle. all the people who he actually connected with on a deeper level have left because of the same reason. but bill was always too terrified to confront everything he's done, which would be necessary to follow them.

so ends part 1... next, i think i'm gonna try to figure out how ford and bill would meet again (haha). ford is sucked into the portal right after (maybe even during?) the whole o'sadley's deal iirc sooo... fun point in the timeline to play with!

also hopin to draw stuff for this AU in the future :]c calling upon the power of my newly aquired ADHD meds lmao