#ANAKIN COMPLEX BE UPON YE

[faeriekit]

"Do you like this character?🥺?" I want to see him sobbing and writhing in a ditch. Leave me alone

[intermundia]

just got lost in the sauce reading an essay about the house of atreus and how ate(umlaut) is both madness & infatuation, punishment & crime, that extends beyond the bounds of mortals. and now i'm thinking about how anakin occupies such an outsized role in the saga as the chosen one, both its hero and its villain, & how in his madness he caused the very death he went mad trying to prevent, this madness having galaxy-wide consequences that only resolve with his death

omg yes i remember back in college i read something about how atē was a kind of curse of blindness, acting under delusion and without awareness of consequences, and i find that so reminiscent of falling to the dark side and the warping of perspective that comes from being lost to the dark, and the consequent loss of empathy that facilitates indiscriminate violence.

anakin's story truly does belong in that demigod tier of the tragic families of antiquity, as it's an inter-generational resolution of a galactic or communal crimes, played out in the microcosm in the life of a single man and the trials of a single family, like his fall, his blindness and wanton violence, his surrender to brutality, and then his return to clear sight and perspective at the end, the entire passage of his life IS the skeleton and flesh of the saga. his journey, his mother's and his children's, it is all the galaxy's journey.

like, within the mythos he is half divine, half Force, both human and superhuman—half person, half narrative. his corruption was the corruption of the republic, and he carried the scars of those crimes inside. in his fall, he acted a scourge upon a community that was negligent and greedy, and surrendered to cruelty, trading freedom for security. it took the drama of generations to resolve this, and it cost his life in the end, but the galaxy moved into a new age with his passing.

idk it's all so painfully reminiscent of ancient mythos that i get emotional about it lmao i'm right there with you on this. i think it's modern mythology and deeply evocative of themes that go all the way back to the beginning of literature. yes it's space fantasy with absurd creature, silly hats, and goofy dialogue, but it's also a gutting and complex narrative centered around the family of a tragic hero that lives up to corpus of stories about the heroes of old.

[that-gay-jedi]

For your WIPs, I'm curious about triple threat or scorched earth?

Aww yeaahh double ask!

So, Triple Threat is. The Jedi have a long-standing theatrical tradition that was put on hold bc of the general galactic chaos shortly before the Clone Wars and some things happen and they think they've won the war, but Sidious is still Chancellor, Order 66 is still waiting to happen, basically it's all a trap.

So they decide to put on a play as one of many little things they're doing to try to be and feel like Jedi again, like reconnect themselves to their way of life from before the war and whatnot. Except. Except.

Their public image took such a nosedive during the war, and dear benevolent Chancellor Palpatine (sarcasm), who is soo concerned for his friends the Jedi and their place in the Republic, says hey, let's also use this as a chance to re-humanize (or alienize... sentient-ize?) them to the general populace.

And ooh he knows just the play, it's not part of the traditional Jedi repertoire but it's VERY popular right now and he's sure it will be greatly improved upon by their Force-augmented performance style, and yes it's a tragedy about a fearless young warrior who destroys everything he is and everything he loves for a doomed romance, but it's only acting, right?

And hey, despite all the controversy General Knight Skywalker is still a holonet heartthrob (& in this verse was a theater kid before the war), they should totally cast him as the lead. Trust me my little green friend, this is a great idea, and here let me lend you this Totally Not a Sith Artifact as a prop. Etc etc.

Many talented Jedi audition for the role of romantic lead, but despite Palpatine's best efforts to get him sent halfway across the galaxy for a mission or have a piano fall on his head, Obi-Wan is cast for it. He only auditioned because the 212th pressured him into it while they were drunk.

He's like no I'm rather too old for all this, what about my Council duties, and besides the press will be expecting Kenobi and Skywalker if I play the role, can't [Insert better actor here] have it? But the rest of the Order decides the Force willed it (and they may be right), so Obi-Wan stars opposite Anakin and shit hits the fan.

Scorched Earth is one of my possible continuations of Fire and Salt, which had Anakin as Lucifer and Obi-Wan as a god of bereavement and mourning. They're sort of getting to know each other as beings after the whole "love at first sight between two forces of the universe that were made for each other" thing from the gathering of the gods.

Of the many co-existing pantheons, some have an apocalyptic tradition and others don't, so I'm kind of playing with the relationship between belief and prophecy, and how the roles Anakin and Obi-Wan each fill has shaped their experience of the universe. They also both have kind of complex relationships to their own cosmologies so there's that. Dating for deities isn't easy.

[c0s-lettuce]

promises, promises - anakin skywalker x reader, part one

reader has the title of queen, set in attack of the clones

a/n: this was requested three life times ago and i sincerely apologise for taking so long! i hope you enjoy!

word count: 2027

No one said politics would be pretty. The Separatist Movement grew daily, and peace was becoming harder to maintain.

And so you find yourself heading to Coruscant. The Galactic Senate is currently debating the Military Creation Act to create an army for the Jedi. Representatives are to travel to Coruscant to vote.

Senator Padmé is going too. She's already voiced her decision to oppose the Act. You respected her decision, and, of course, she said she would respect yours too.

You're disrupted from your thoughts when you hear beeping. There's an incoming message.

As the queen of Ruma, a neighbouring planet in the Naboo system, you worked a lot with Padmé. She is your role model, confidante and friend. And there's no one who you'd like more as an associate.

------

"The landing zone has been compromised," it said. It was a Coruscanti security officer. "We need you to redirect your route to the coordinates we've sent."

As your pilot acknowledges the message, you walk up towards the front of the ship.

"What happened?" you ask.

Your head of security, Max, addresses you, "There's been an incident. Senator Amidala's ship was shot up."

"Is she all right?" you question, feeling a sense of panic.

"Yes, but it took the life of her decoy. We're landing elsewhere to ensure your safety."

One of Padmé's handmaidens is dead? Just like that, an innocent life is gone. You had been warned of the danger that your presence posed, but you didn't expect this calibre of violence.

As your ship advances to a new location, you hope for the safety of the others.

The new landing area is around the back of the original building and is more hidden among the lower ground. If you had to guess from the crates, it's usually used for cargo.

As you exit your ship, you find it slightly insulting the number of guards you had around you.

"Is this really necessary?" you ask, being as subtle as you can.

Max remains stoic beside you, "Yes, you're in danger as long as you're out in the open. Anybody could be watching."

Sighing, you allow them to escort you into the building.

------

Night approaches, and you and Padmé get settled in your rooms in the Senate Apartment Complex. The events from earlier today certainly shook the two of you, despite neither of you getting hurt.

Upon arrival, Chancellor Palpatine suggested the two of you be placed under the protection of the Jedi. Despite Padmé believing the situation was not that serious, the decision went forward.

Later, the two Jedi arrived. Padmé had known them from many years ago. General Obi-Wan Kenobi seemed like a kind and respectable man. Anakin,  Obi-Wan's apprentice, as you learned, was different. He was young with a hint of rebellion in him. You noticed his behaviour towards Padmé was a lot more... ardent. After a short discussion, they agreed they would try to find Padmé's attacker.

You retreat to your room and try to relax. There's Jedi posted outside - not that you need them - and Padmé was just across the hall from you. Really there's nothing to worry about, or so you tell yourself.

Though that still won't stop you from keeping your quarterstaff nearby.

You lie in the semi-dark, facing away from the light from the city shining through your windows. You're lying still, but your body can't commit to sleep. You're too on edge.

Minutes pass, and you blame your mind for imagining things when a shadow passes by your window. However, you become concerned when you hear a soft thud. Suddenly, hyperaware of your surroundings, you're sure this is no trick. There's someone in your room.

You can almost feel their presence approaching the bed. Eyeing your staff resting just by your bed, you silently hype yourself up.

It's now or never. Fight or possibly get killed.

Rolling off the bed, you launch towards your staff. You grab onto it as your move to stand. Holding your weapon in a defensive position, you get a vague look at the attacker. They look like a woman. Though your staring contest ends as they lunge towards you to attack.

You're able to dodge, manoeuvring away and striking her back. Using your combat skills and the slight advantage of surprise, it doesn't take long to get the upper hand, pinning your assailant under your foot.

One simple rule in combat is to not get distracted by things around you. But you make that mistake as Anakin barges into your room, lightsaber ablaze.

You turn to look at him, "Anakin?"

Having taken your eyes off your attacker, she takes the opportunity to knock you off her. You trip over, giving her time to escape through the window.

Anakin rushes to your side, "How did you- are you alright?"

Before you can answer, you hear glass breaking from the other room. Anakin whips his head back, trying to spot the source, then turns back to you.

"Stay here," he says. He leaves your room quickly.

Max and a couple other guards enter promptly after him. They're quick to check if you're okay. But you weren't all that worried about yourself. After taking a second to collect yourself, you rush to check on Padmé. Entering her room, you find her being tended to by her people and her window completely smashed.

You decide then maybe there is something to worry about.

------

Just as soon as you arrive on Coruscant is how soon you're asked to leave again. Anakin is to escort you and Padmé - who is justifiably pissed off - back to Naboo. You were even instructed not to return to your home in Ruma with the reason being "safety in numbers".

It doesn't take you long to pack, as you barely unpacked. You leave your room, and an upset-looking Padmé joins you.

As you walk together to leave the building, you ask her, "What's wrong?"

She scoffs, giving you a vague response of, "Men."

Unsure of exactly what she is implying, you look behind you. Anakin is following a small distance away from the two of you. He watches Padmé with an unreadable expression.

You start to gather an understanding of what she means.

Looking back at her, you press further, "Oh, do tell."

Padmé finally looks at you, "Maybe later."

The three of you make it to the transport bus. You are all to travel as refugees to prevent the enemy from knowing you've left. Padmé is talking with her handmaiden, Dormé. And General Kenobi is discussing what you assume to be the current situation with Max and Padmé's captain of security, Typho.

Judging from her unimpressed face, you decide to leave it alone. Though you can't help but find this situation to be slightly humorous.

------

That left you and Anakin sitting together in silence. He (not to your surprise) has been staring at Padmé for most of the trip. You decide to use this opportunity to get to know him better.

"So," you begin, "You and Padmé, how long have you known each other?"

Anakin turns to look at you. He takes a second to respond, seemingly not having expected you to talk to him.

"I met her ten years ago," he says, "During the Trade Federation dispute. Although we haven't seen each other since then."

"Wow, that's a long time," you reply.

"It is," he clears his throat, sitting up a bit, "What about you? How long have you known her?"

"About twelve years now. We've worked together a lot throughout the years."

"I imagine you must know each other pretty well then," Anakin looks over at Padmé again.

"Yes, I do," you say.

Anakin doesn't say anything back. You imagine he's distracted by watching Padmé's every movement. So you attempt to keep the conversation going.

"Hey, uh," you lower your voice slightly, "Just some advice, if you're trying to woo her, maybe don't stare holes into the back of her head."

Anakin whips his head back to you. He looks surprised and a bit... embarrassed?

"How did you know I-"

You interrupt, "I know a lot of things, Ani," you purposefully use Padmé's nickname for him.

He smiles, blushing a bit, and takes another look at Padmé. Then he seems to remember what you told him and turns back to you.

"Alright, well, if you know so much about me, I want to know about you too," he says, still smiling.

"Okay then, what do you want to know?" you ask him.  

"How long have you been Queen of Ruma?"

"I'm still in my first term. But I used to be a minister in the Royal Advisory Council."

"Have you ever met Jedi before?"

"Yes, but I didn't spend much time with them."

"What's your opinion on R2-D2?"

At the sound of his name, the droid in question turns toward you and lets out a series of beeps.

"I think he's adorable," you say.

R2 beeps again and waddles in celebration, which further proves your point. You hear Anakin laugh. You decide then it's a sound you like hearing.

After a few seconds of silence, you look at him. He's already looking at you, the unreadable expression from before making a comeback.

Unsure of what else to say, you ask, "You got any more questions?"

He doesn't answer straight away. He seems to be deliberating, and he's about to say something before-

"We have arrived," Captain Typho announces.

As the bus lands, General Kenobi pulls Anakin aside. Max takes this opportunity to talk to you. And he's worried for you as always.

"You know I can take care of myself," you tell him.

"I know, I know, just... stay safe, okay?" he says.

"Okay, I will. I promise," you say.

"It's time to go," Anakin notifies you.

Sighing, you bid Max, "Good luck."

"You too, your highness," he gives a slight bow.

You offer him one last smile before picking up your luggage and leaving the bus. The three of you walk toward the Starfreighter.

"Suddenly, I'm afraid," Padmé speaks up.

"This is my first assignment on my own. I am too," Anakin says.

"We just have to hold out hope that things will be alright," you add.

"It will be," Anakin assures you, "Besides, don't worry. We've got R2 with us."

R2 chirps happily from behind you. You turn to smile at him. As you walk among the spaceport, you hope Anakin is right.

------

You watch as Anakin and Padmé sit together. They seemed to be engaging in a pleasant conversation.

The Starfreighter is less comfortable than you hoped for. You are all currently cooped up in the steerage hold. Due to a lack of tables, you opted to have some alone time during your meal.

You end up sitting off to the side surrounded by luggage and cargo. You still have your quarter staff by you side. It's the only thing offering comfort right now.

R2 rolls up next to you, holding out a piece of bread. You take it from him.

"Thanks, buddy," you say as he settles next to you.

You turn your attention back to the two. You can't quite figure out their relationship.

"Hey R2," you address the droid, "Do you know if something's going on between the two of them?"

R2 beeps a response. Using what you know of Binary, you decipher that he doesn't really know either.

You let out a huff, taking a bite of your dry bread. Whatever it is, you can't help but get a strange feeling from watching Padmé and Anakin together.

➸

[slightlysuspect]

Brave New World Pt. 4

Upon taking a moment to gather my thoughts, I feel like I have some real direction for where this story is about to go. I'm getting cautiously optimistic about where we're going.

Obi-Wan recently landed back on Coruscant, and he asked me to meet him at the Senate building. I'm sure he's just as eager as I am to hear how the peace talks are going. I imagine Padme and I find a couple ways to celebrate Galactic peace tonight.

"Anakin!" It would seem Obi-Wan has managed to sneak up on me. "I'm glad to see you in one piece on the other side, 'Master' Skywalker."

"Ha. The same to you 'Master' Kenobi." You should always match Obi-Wan's sarcasm with sarcasm. A mange to get a chuckle out of him.

"Congratulations Anakin. I know this is what you wanted. Do you feel any different?"

"Titles mean little when you posses as much timeless wisdom as I do."

"Right. Anakin now that you are a master, you do need to be more mindful of your arrogance. You directly represent the Jedi Order now."

"I know Master, I know. I'm taking my new responsibility very seriously. So how was your battle with Grievous?" This is my first time seeing him since he left for the outer rim.

"Oh rather mundane I'd say." he said. "It certainly pales in comparison to your defeat of the Dark Lord of the Sith."

Ahhh I would really appreciate if people would stop talking about this. "Yes it was tough battle. Many great Jedi died."

"Oh I heard a lot about the altercation from Master Windu." And once again Mace complicates things.

"Ah is that what the council was talking about before I got there?"

"The meeting had barely started Anakin. Master Windu was informing us of why we had three empty seats, and then you walked in. No he told me the more complex details of last night in private."

"Master I was confused. And a little sparring helps me calm my mind."

He only sighs. "I'm well aware. Don't make the mistake of thinking since you attained the rank of Master that you are done learning. You need to overcome your emotions before it's too late."

Jedi are always so quick to catastrophize. "I understand Master. I will continue to work on it."

The doors to the Senate Chamber opened, and several politicians began flooding out. They must've entered a recess. Soon Senator Organa and Padme find their way to us.

Bail speaks first. "Negotiations are proving tricky. Despite losing their leading political and military figures, the Separatists are still hesitant to agree to terms."

"What?" I ask in disbelief. What are they fighting for anymore? "Why not? What's their problem now?"

"Well half of it is the terms for surrender." Padme says. "Bail these people have no desire to fight anymore, but they also don't wish to return to the republic. We shouldn't be trying to force them to."

Bail says, "While I don't disagree Senator Amidala, I fear recognizing their sovereignty will not be a popular movement in the Senate. Forcing them to accept a full surrender seems like the path of least resistance."

"This is ridiculous!" Padme states angrily. Seeing her upset begins angering me as well. "We don't have to fight anymore! They will agree to end this war if we just recognize the legitimacy of their government!"

"And you really think Chancellor Taa is willing to recognize their government?" Bail asks.

Obi-wan immediately scoffs. "Chancellor Taa? The fat Twi'lek? Surely he isn't the face of freedom in the galaxy."

Bail forces a smile, "It is believed to be a temporary appointment, until we can go through the proper channels of electing a new one."

Obi-Wan is clearly unimpressed. "And no one is concerned with his close ties to the last Chancellor?" He asks.

Bail sighs. "He is well networked with a lot of the corporations. There's a sea of supporters in the senate for Chancellor Taa."

Padme interjects, "And he profits from the war! Bail the vote will always favor continuing the war. We have to do something."

"But what can we do?" Bail asks.

Obi-Wan places his hand on his chin, lost in thought. Eventually he asks, "Do we know where the Separatists are?"

"Well yes actually." Bail says. "We've been communicating with the Separatist leaders throughout the negotiations, and we have their location tracked to Mustafar."

"Hmmm." Obi-Wan seems to have a proposal. "While I grow tired of resolving every dispute with violence, it does seem as though the quickest way to end the war would be to attack the Separatist leaders directly."

"What!?" Padme grows increasingly more irritated. "Their terms for peace are reasonable! We are the ones who demand too much of them!"

Obi-Wan is unfazed. "Yes I agree. Alas fighting political corruption is much more difficult than fighting a war. I agree with Senator Organa. The quickest way forward is the full surrender and dissolution of the Separatist Alliance."

"Who cares what the quickest way is!?" Padme inquires angrily. "What about the best way? If we want long standing peace in the galaxy, then we have to be willing to compromise with our neighbors across the galaxy!"

"I couldn't say it better myself Senator Amidala." Obi-Wan says. "Unfortunately this war is terrorizing the galaxy, and to see it swiftly ended must be our top priority."

Regardless," Bail cuts in, "we are in a ceasefire until the negotiations are concluded. No one will be attacking the Separatists today."

Now my frustration is peaking. We aren't at peace, yet we can't fight the war? "So then the war goes on?" I ask incredulously. "And while the threat looms in the air, we're expected to sit and do nothing? This is ridiculous!"

Obi-Wan only smirks, "That's politics old friend."

Author's Note

Honestly I write too much politics, but I just find Star Wars politics so interesting. ESPECIALLY during the clone wars. Politics was such a massive aspect of the clone wars, and it's so fun to recreate the Galactic Senate's dysfunction in my story. That being said I am still intending to move away from the political stuff once I can get into the meat and potatoes of my new universe.

[obi-wkenobi]

SO dude! I really wanna start reading some Star Wars books but I honestly don’t know where to start! Would you be able to recommend some please? 🥺

Hi, anon! Where to start depends on the era you're most interested in, there are so, so many Star Wars books that it can often be overwhelming. I've listed below some of my favourites, mostly focusing on the prequel era and on Obi-Wan and Anakin, either together or apart.

Prequel era (legends)

Revenge of the Sith by Matthew Stover: this is an absolute must, in my opinion. If you've ever felt that the film didn't delve enough into explaining Anakin's actions, then read this book. Stover does a brilliant job expanding upon canon and creating a compelling story that helps readers to better understand the situation Anakin was in, and why he fell. His writing is gripping and his characterisation of Anakin and Obi-Wan is my favourite throughout all of the Star Wars books I've read. Your heart will break for all the characters, but mostly for Anakin. Stover weaves a complex narrative surrounding this tragic character and all the people he held dear. (Also the Anakin and Obi-Wan scenes in this book are chefs kiss, yes they hurt, but they're so very good).

Labyrinth of Evil by James Luceno: this story takes place immediately before RotS and is great to read before the RotS novelization. Luceno creates a suspenseful atmosphere that has the reader hoping for a happy ending, despite already knowing how the overall story already ends.

The Clone Wars: Wild Space by Karen Miller: set immediately after Attack of the Clones, we spend a short amount of time with Anakin and Obi-Wan at the start of the story, with some brilliant interactions between the pair. For the most part though, this story focuses on Obi-Wan and Bail and how their friendship evolves as they find themselves stuck in a difficult situation. I adore this book for that reason, for me, Miller builds a believable rapport between the two. I found myself better understanding why Bail helped the Jedi in RotS and why he remained one of the few people Obi-Wan trusted after Order 66 and for decades thereafter. The book deals with some dark themes, but it's intermixed with some action, humour, and tender moments, and I find myself rereading it a lot.

Clone Wars Gambit: Stealth and Clone Wars Gambit: Siege by Karen Miller: Set during the Clone Wars, these two books include peak Obi-Wan and Anakin content as we join them on an off-world mission. In these books, the reader better learns what these characters are driven by, and importantly, how they view each other. The reader can clearly see how these opinions will have devastating consequences in the future, and Miller does a brilliant job in building tension whilst maintaining a story that is sometimes funny and often heartrending. The books are poignant in their representation of a true, genuine friendship, that unfortunately begins showing deep, dire cracks.

Prequel era (canon)

Master and Apprentice by Claudia Gray: set during Obi-Wan's Padawan years, this book establishes Obi-Wan's and Qui-Gon's relationship. It shows the difficulties they encounter, how they often differ in their choices, and how the two learn to accept and embrace these differences. Gray also begins installing certain characteristics of Obi-Wan that we have come to associate with him when we meet them again in TPM, mostly his need to abide by the Jedi Council and his hesitancy around prophecies. I found this book really enjoyable and a great insight into how Obi-Wan's Padawanship influenced who he would become as Anakin's Master.

Dark Disciple by Christie Golden: set during the Clone Wars, this book focuses on Jedi Master Quinlan Vos and a mission he's sent on. We see him and Asajj Ventress forming an unexpected bond with one another and witness Quinlan losing touch with who he is. I have some problems with this book, mostly with its ending, but it was interesting to read and features some great cameos from Obi-Wan and Anakin (of course).

Empire era (legends)

Dark Lords: The Rise of Darth Vader by James Luceno: this is one of my favourite Star Wars books, mostly due to Luceno's incredible characterisation of Vader, and is another one of my must-reads. Set immediately after RotS, Luceno devotes much of the story to the internal conflict that Vader undergoes as he tries to slough off his former identity of Anakin. Palpatine intends for these early missions that he sends Vader on to be as much about learning what it means to be a Sith as they are about consolidating the rule of the nascent Empire. A lot of the story focuses on a band of Jedi who survive Order 66 and their journey as they try to understand what has happened. It's a sad story, but brilliant in its execution of setting up the Empire era under Palpatine's rule and Vader's fist.

Kenobi by John Jackson Miller: set after RotS and during Obi-Wan's initial few days in exile on Tatooine, the book mostly focuses on new, external characters, whilst subtly interweaving Obi-Wan into the story. We may not experience his viewpoint a lot, but I found his interactions with others, and their interpretations of him, enough. I feel that Miller did a wonderful job in showing how Obi-Wan is struggling with his new mission, especially when he realises that protecting Luke means setting aside his compassion and his Jedi warrior training, for the future of the galaxy lies not with Obi-Wan Kenobi, but with a man named Ben. I like to read this and the above book close together, it really helps with understanding Obi-Wan's and Anakin's frame of mind during those initial days after Mustafar, and is heartbreaking to read how both are suffering as a result.

I hope this was helpful anon! I have many others that I'd recommend but thought that nine books are a reasonable starting number. If you, or anyone else, has any other questions then send me an ask. 😊

[starksvixen]

Both Good and Evil

Summary: Darth Regius has a mission sent down from Emperor Palpatine. Entice Anakin Skywalker to the Dark Side using any means possible. But as the two draw closer, learning more about their pasts, they realize the balance of both good and evil.

Warnings: Ends with angst, darker themes, LONG ASS FIC

“Careful, Anakin, too harsh of a swing and you can hurt yourself!” 

You tuck a bit of your bottom lip underneath your teeth as you look at the hologram of the handsome young Jedi training with fervor, his blonde braid gently swaying with each swing of his saber. 

“I’m glad you find him attractive, you’ll need that...” a general says from behind you. 

“And why is that?” 

“You’ll need to use your...sexual capabilities to draw him over.”

Turning towards the bitter old man, the sharp static nips at your fingers as the dark Force flows through you, imagining his throat slowly closing under your grasp. 

“You will not comment on my capabilities again unless you like your little hands there, General,”

Throwing him to the ground, you ignite one of the tiny dagger like lightsabers concealed in your corset and send it straight into the General’s head. A soft sizzle and subtle smell of pennies fills the air as you analyze the Jedi from his hologram state.

Anger fills his stature with each calculated swing, a certain glint in his eye. One that obviously hungers for revenge. A weakness, something to prey on.

Something to lure him to the Dark side...

You feel your eyes flutter to a close, the world around you turning to static as you feel for his dark energy. Then you find it, the tiniest of sparks. Before you can prey upon it, your eyes are forced open, a voice echoing from behind you:

“Who are you? How did you get into the Jedi temple?”

There he was, lightsaber raised, fear in his eyes. A fight he knew he might not win against the renowned Darth Regius. 

But as you look around your surroundings, it seems as if he was on the ship with you, standing as if he had boarded minutes ago.

“I could ask you the same thing, how did you get on my ship?”

He refuses to answer, the words on his tongue fighting against his lips, a stoic face to hide his fear for the vixen of power standing before him. You cock your head softly to the side, walking closer to him as you feel the dark static you feel pulsing through your veins exuding from him. 

“You want revenge, I can feel it. You want power and to feel free from the shackles the Jedi Order have locked on you.” 

“You’re wrong!” 

His voice wavers, his saber drops the slightest touch, his shoulders ease. The idea tickles his ears as it runs like a mad man throughout his train of thought. Slowly, you bridge the gap drawn between the two of you, holding out your hand towards him. 

“Show me your pain. And I can show you freedom.” 

You can see the switch in his mind, feel the light side burning you with its touch as an even more real burn makes its way towards your extended hand. The connection ends as the lightsaber lands, leaving singed skin and grimaces. 

But you saw it, the Dark side taunting him, pulling him in slowly. 

He just needed a little push.

-

You sit in your black armchair, looking at the stars as they whiz by, your tongue enveloping the bitter coffee as you sip it. 

“How did you know I wanted revenge.”

You smirk as you place the cup back on the saucer that delicately balances on your lap. Turning your head, you quirk an eyebrow at the shirtless man before you, obviously roused from sleep.

“Well, good evening to you too,”

“Answer the question.”

A soft chuckle bounces across your throat before you lift your small cup and take another sip of coffee. 

“Why the Force of course,” you say softly, looking out at the stars once again. “You’re taught that the different sides of the Force are just that, different.”

“Because one is used for evil and the other good.”

“But the Force doesn’t determine that, the person wielding it does. Some don’t choose either side, some choose to be the balance. Like how you were prophesied to be. The Jedi Order is delusional, thinking that balance means goodness restored.” 

His eyes widen softly with interest, his shoulders releasing themselves from the cords that hung them close to his ears. You gesture towards the chair in front of you, to which he slowly takes.

“Listen, Anakin, I understand the Order is your entire life. But there is so much you don’t know, what they’ve kept from you. Because balance is not one way or another. One cannot exist without the other. You’re prophesied to bring balance to the Force, not be the Order’s puppet.”

“But that balance means the fall of the Dark Side, that’s what I was meant to do.” he says, his face contorted into confusion.

“Not necessarily. While yes, I do believe you will be the fall of the Sith, the Dark Side will always be around. I believe you are not a sole vessel for goodness. You are a vessel of great complexity, holding both good and dark in your hands.”

Silence fills the vessel as your gaze is drawn back towards the stars. You feel his eyes on you until he fades away, yet another connection broken.

- 

“Jedi are swarming the ship! We need to evacuate!” 

Grabbing your lightsaber, you secure it to your corset filled with saber daggers, their handles at the ready. Rushing out from your room, you look at the battleground before you. 

“There she is! Darth Regius!”

A group of young Jedi’s yelled this as they ran down the hallway towards you. But as you pulled the handle from your corset, relinquishing the burning blade, they ran like chickens. 

“(Y/N)?” 

Turning around quickly, you’re met with a stunned Anakin, his lightsaber at the ready. Without hesitation, you take the first swing. As confusion interrupts his beautiful features, you project a message through the Force. 

Look like you hate me. Wouldn’t want your master to find out about our little chats now would you?

Quickly, forced hatred plasters onto him as his strikes become more and more aggressive. As his force becomes harder and harder to block, you become more frantic. No way were you about to let a padawan bring you down, even if he was your mission. 

Without a thought, your next swing strikes him in the face, causing the smallest of scratched burns to form. With a gasp, you watch as he reels back from the blow, a small smirk coming on his face. 

“You owe me a rematch,”

With that, he runs away with his other Jedi as the entire ship cheers in defeat of the Jedi attack. Everyone around you chants your name, but you don’t have the same fervor. Instead, your mind replays the moment over and over again, one sentence coming out in front it all. 

He finally trusts me. 

 -

"Why trust me?” you ask softly from your desk, different forms needing to be signed glaring at you under harsh light. 

“I don’t,” Anakin replies, his lightsaber humming with each swing as he twirls it around with accuracy, pacing back and forth in your room. 

You stop what you’re doing, laying the pen down straight against the papers before standing up. Anakin stops his twirl pacing, looking towards you as you hold out both hands to him.

“What are you doing?”

“Giving you something to trust.” 

A few minutes pass as you hold your position in front of him, your hands beginning to shake under the weight of vulnerability. Eventually, he drops his saber somewhere unseen, and the calloused hand as well as metal seamlessly slide into yours. 

You project your worst memory, Emperor Palpatine murdering your parents. They were meant to keep his child safe alongside you, raising the two of you together so you would become dyad’s in the force, a perfect storm of darkness. 

But then the child ran away.  

A dyad unmade. 

A deal broken.

The tears fall as you hear their screams, the buzz of a lightsaber silencing them with one fell swoop. 

“Come, child,” his gravelly voice echoes. 

Filled with fear you follow, the memory ending, leaving you reduced to tears in front of the boy you had just barely gotten to know. 

“You’re...young, like me?” Anakin says shakily, looking at you with unshed tears. “I was always told you were older.”

You shake your head, shaking the tears away, shaking the pain and loss off your heart. 

“I worked hard to survive. Be the child Palpatine lost or face the same fate as my parents.”

“Have you tried to escape? Call for help from the Order?” 

“They are the reason my parents are dead!” 

You harshly pull your hands away from his, the broken and war torn fingers digging into your own hips. 

“A Jedi saw Palpatine’s child and helped him escape, to bring him away from the dark side. That Jedi signed my parents’ death warrant...” 

Turning your back to him, you sigh, lifting a shaking hand to wipe away any sign of weakness left on your face. But another wave of sadness hits you as something different enters your mind’s eye.

Anakin, his nightmares, her dead body, the slaughter, all of it. It plays in your head like a nightmare before his force slowly withdraws. 

Your body disobeys your mind as you twist to the broken man in front of you. 

“You’re not the only one who’s lost someone.” 

Walking over, you wrap your arms around his neck and hold him close. His strong arms wrap around your waist as you chuckle softly. 

“We’re both pretty fucked up, huh?”

“I guess we are,”

A knock on the door makes him suddenly disappear, leaving only the shape of him in your curled arms.

-                              

Warm water drips down your skin as you struggle to see through the steam in your small refresher. You reminisce on the months that had passed. What began as long talks across galaxies became long talks across bedrooms. You knew you had a job to bring him to the Dark side, how dangerous a connection to him could be. You repeated the mantra every night. Slipping on the silky robe you placed on the black marble counter, you walk out to your bedroom to find Anakin sitting upon the silk sheets. 

His padawan braid was gone, his dull beige robes replaced by dark leather that showed off his frame quite well. 

“I see they’ve let you graduate, Anakin.”

“Finally...”

“I told you that they wouldn’t understand your power, that they would hold you back,” 

A scoff comes from the man, causing a smirk to come from you. Walking towards him, you gently lay a hand on his cheek where the smallest of scars lays on his handsome face. As you analyze his features, the way his eyes look at you full of lust and adoration, you slowly lay down, laying a gentle kiss on his plush lips. Your hands make their way into his hair as his hands pull you closer to him by your hips. Slowly, your lips break apart but still stay closer together, your mumbles tickling his lips with each word:

“You should grow out your hair, it would suit you,” 

A soft smile, one that only you got to see (but you never knew that) appeared on his face as he gently pulls your hand away from his scalp.

“You flatter me too much,”

“Only because you deserve it.” 

His gaze falls, guilt pushing his shoulders to cave in towards his chest. Your heart shakes, threatening to break. Taking a step back, you take a deep breath as you turn towards the doors of your refresher. 

“You deserve the truth...” you whisper. 

Slowly, you turn back towards him. 

“I was tasked to bring you to the Dark side. Emperor Palpatine is part of the Sith, he is not who you think he is.”

His eyes widen at your sudden divulgence, only to be quickly filled with anger. 

“So all of this time you’ve been manipulating me?!”

“No! Nothing I ever did was to manipulate you!” you walk closer to him. “Because I found not a broken boy but a strong man meant to carry out his prophecy. Please believe me!”

Anakin pushes you away with the Force, an evil glow filling his eyes. You had done your job, but never had you felt worse. 

“Well, I guess you completed your task.” 

And with that...he was gone. 

[passable-talent]

So like, maybe reader gets captured or something like that and Anakin kinda loses it? I give you creative liberties since I’ve never sent a request before 👉👈 hope you are having a nice day!

congrats ahdjfjs you made it in under the wire!!

and that’s fine! I love when people bring requests to me regardless of how formatted they bring it 

This mission was essential. 

General Grievous was a threat to the galaxy, and he needed to be destroyed, whatever it took. So, when his location was ensured and confirmed, the Jedi Order sent three Jedi to infiltrate it. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker, and (Y/N). They were to slide into the complex he was visiting, set up explosives, and detonate it, leaving no chance for escape to anyone within it. 

And for the most part, everything had gone according to plan. 

Every detonator was weaponized and placed. Now, they just needed to get out, and to safety, to blow it all. And General Grievous would die. That’s all you needed- for your luck to hold out just a little bit longer. 

But why would it?

Why would luck favor you, the Jedi who betrayed the Code with every thought that crossed your mind? The Jedi who would leave it all behind, if asked, for one man? This man another Jedi, if things weren’t bad enough. The Force had no reason to reward you, and your blasphemy, your bitterness, your utter disregard for the code you’d been told to live by all your life. Regardless of your skill with a saber or ship, the Force refused to be kind to you.

And so it almost never was. 

A routine droid patrol came across the three of you. You destroyed them as quickly as you could, having made no missteps, no errors, but they had sent up the alarm. And all was ruined.

But that was fine, it was okay, as long as- as long as you could make it out, you could blow it all, and Grievous would die, all the same. You just needed to run. Fast enough to escape, to get clear. That’s all you needed.

It was a mad dash to the exit of the complex, at a dead sprint, no heed for anything else. No discussion, no banter, no plan. Just run. You had your saber at your belt, having no need for it in the moment, keeping all of your energy for the run beside Obi-Wan. The Code wasn’t here, wasn’t to protect you in battle. Your bitterness toward the teachings you’d been given all your life was in your heart as you ran, ran as a lowly soldier for the Republic, not as a peace keeper for the galaxy. 

The code, which served meditators, served the peaceful council who sat in their chairs and judged the foot soldiers, the knights who risked their lives. What other than emotion, ignorance, passion, chaos, death, existed in war? Here, there was no peace, there was no knowledge, no serenity, nor harmony. Why should the Force guide you in war?

You made no sound when you went down. 

The droid hit just below your ribcage, on your right side, and your legs faltered under you. You hit the floor, adrenaline pumping through your body, and you struggled upwards as best you could. The Force never favored you, the Code never guided you. 

You were caught by the ankle, and dragged back down. 

“Anakin!” you screamed, trying to find purchase on the smooth tile floor as you were dragged backwards. He whirled around, now without the gates, safe beyond where the blast would reach him. His eyes met yours as you struggled, retrieved and ignited your saber, stabbing it into the floor. You thought it might give you a chance, you hoped it would stop you from being dragged back further. 

“(Y/N)!” he called, and the doors began to close. 

There is no emotion, there is peace.

“Blow it!” You knew that as long as you were being dragged back, Grievous would focus his attention on keeping the captured Jedi, not hunting down the other two. While you were inside, right now, Grievous was still to be killed by the explosion. “Anakin, blow it!” 

And the gate shut, leaving behind only your parting words, a desperate plea for death. 

.

Anakin looked downward at the button in his hand. 

“Anakin, they told you what you need to do,” Obi-Wan said, sensing the confliction in his former padawan. Anakin knew what needed to be done, but...

But he couldn’t let you die. 

“They told you to go through with the plan,” Obi-Wan insisted, “They must have known they would die, but that it would cause us to succeed. Detonate it, Anakin.” 

“I can’t,” Anakin said, voice strained and hurt. 

“Anakin, are you willing to lose a war to keep them alive?” Obi-Wan asked, his voice accusatory, and Anakin narrowed his eyes toward Obi-Wan. 

“Yes,” he breathed, and after not an instant more launched the detonator, far away into the forest. 

.

You were torn from your saber, but that was alright. Your side was bleeding through charred skin, and your arms were tired, and it was alright. You accepted the fiery explosion that would take your life, because you knew it would take Grievous’, too. 

There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.

You could die well, in service of the galaxy, even if it was as just a soldier. You could die, knowing that you’d take Grievous with you into the fire and the flames. At least, to Anakin, you would die a Jedi. A noble hero.

But it never came. And when your foot was finally dropped, the blunt of a weapon smashed into your temple. You were unconscious within the second.

. 

Anakin and Obi-Wan had fled to the forest, where they would be safe- for now. 

“Anakin, do you understand what you’ve done?” Obi-Wan scolded him, “The mission has not only failed, but you’ve done (Y/N) a disservice by keeping them alive in the care of Grievous.”

“I’ll get them out,” Anakin growled, his rage-filled eyes turned toward the forest floor. 

“You can’t possibly go in there,” Obi-Wan said, “it’s suicide. They’ll be on high alert.”

“You said it yourself, master.” Anakin turned over his saber in his grip, voice cold. “Every moment they spend alive with Grievous is torture.”

“You’ll die if you go after them,” Obi-Wan reminded him. 

“They were willing to die for us,” Anakin said, “I’m the same.”

“Anakin, we cannot afford to lose two good Jedi-”

“I can’t afford to lose them.”

There is no passion, there is serenity.

.

You awoke in a chair, reclined, as though your comfort had been considered by your captor. But you couldn’t move your arms nor legs, nor even your neck, and your wound hadn’t been treated. You felt it lazily sludging blood into your robes. 

Grievous introduced himself by wheezing your surname.

“A fine saber,” he said, appreciating the ignited orange blade, “an excellent addition to my collection.” He had kept you from moving your arms, but done nothing about your fingers, and so you opened your hand, calling your saber to you with the Force. It ripped from his grip and flew to yours, and so you gave him a triumphant, cocky smile. 

Grievous growled, and brought the back of his metal hand across your right cheekbone. The metal cut through your flesh like gelatin. 

Tears immediately came to your eyes, and you felt the blood begin to roll down your jaw, but you turned your gaze back to him without a word. 

“It seems you aren’t interested in a discussion of weapons,” Grievous said, grabbing your saber from your hand again, “So I’ll move on. You’re going to tell me all about where your little Jedi friends are hiding.”

As if he thought you’d be so easy. 

.

Most of the security of the base was either on its exterior, thanks to the two Jedi that had disappeared into the forest, or within it, thanks to the Jedi at Grievous’ disposal. That meant that there were droids in every single place Anakin wanted to be, and as such there were to be plenty of things in his way. But Anakin Skywalker had never been one to balk at obstacles. 

Obi-Wan let him go, to attempt to retrieve you, finally admitting that if he could save you, it would do good for the galaxy. He was still silently angered that Anakin hadn’t blown the base, but he would save that lecture for another day. Something about ‘respecting the wishes of a dying Jedi’. Such a lecture was burned deep into his heart. 

Obi-Wan offered only a bit of help, providing a distraction on the north end of the complex so that attention would be drawn from the South. Anakin made it past the first wall, and once he had, there wasn’t much left to go, until he reached the droid army that would have no doubt amassed around you, keeping you prisoner. He knew you were wounded, and that you may not be much help- still, he was determined to get you out, no matter what it took. 

There is no chaos, there is harmony. 

.

Eventually, you pissed Grievous off so much that he was finished with you. You were still useful to him, so he couldn’t kill you, but how he wanted to. He took you by the throat, dragging you from the room. You gripped at his hand at your throat, his metal fingers digging and pinching and cutting the thin skin of your neck, and you tried to kick from his grip, to no success. 

“You are an irritating slime,” Grievous told you, voice hoarse as always, and tossed you by the neck into a cell. Its door closed before you even hit the floor. 

Which was good- it saved you embarrassment. You tried to catch yourself, but the door being up three stairs from the floor, and you fell further than you expected. You’d managed to plant your foot straight down, but too much weight came down upon your left leg. As though time had slowed down, you felt your mistake, and as your body was still twisting through the air, you felt it when your femur came down upon your knee, and when it found resistance, it slipped to the side, twisting, while your tibia remained where it was. 

The pain was immediate. As was your collapse to the floor.

.

Where luck had been against him from the moment he placed the last explosive, Anakin had finally run into a stroke of good luck. Grievous was nowhere to be seen when Anakin located the wing that you must’ve been- a cell door, shut and sealed, surrounded by a dozen droids. 

Easy. 

Anger wasn’t meant to be the way of the Jedi, Anakin knew that. But he had disobeyed the code plenty of times before, and now, he would do it again. He didn’t need to curb himself- his rage, in this instant, was his focus, drawing him toward his singular goal. 

Not a single droid managed to fire a single shot. 

One well-placed swipe of the saber and the door swung open. 

.

You were laying on your back on the floor, trying to ride out your pain. 

The door opened on your left, and for an instant you weren’t sure if this was fantasy, or reality- Anakin Skywalker, your guardian angel, here to rescue you. 

“Anakin?” You breathed, and as he stepped through the door you decided that he must be real. He had to be. So you threw your left leg over your right, rolling onto your stomach to begin the process of standing. It threw the whole world out of balance, your dizziness and blood loss starting to affect you. 

There is no death, there is the Force.

Only when you were on your knees did you reveal to Anakin your right side- its bloody wound from droid fire, its deep cuts along your cheek and neck, and the large, smudged print of blood your wet robes left on the floor. He rushed forward to you, gently helping you to your feet, and immediately he noticed how you lifted your left foot from the floor. 

“I’ve got you,” he said, pulling your left arm over his shoulder so that your injured leg hung between you. His words were a promise, more than a statement- that you would escape, that he would make sure of it. He started toward the door, and you tried to assist him, but with every step his fingers, meant to hold you up by gripping your right side, dug into the skin nearby your wound. You couldn’t see, with all the blood and sweat in your eyes, now blurring anew with tears. 

“Anakin,” you said again, trying to say any number of things- ‘I’m sorry’, ‘leave me behind’, ‘thank you’. But your voice failed you, and you just left your jaw hang slack with grunts of pain and panting breath, every ounce of your focus taken by limping toward the exit. 

Until a single thought entered your mind. 

“My saber,” you groaned, pulling from his grip when he tried to continue. “I need to find my saber.” 

“(Y/N), we don’t have time,” Anakin said, trying to gather you toward the gate again, but you resisted with a shake of your head, eyes dulled but focused. 

“It might still be- I have to find it.” If you had any control, over anything in the galaxy, it was yourself. You could control your own fate, your own decisions, your body. Sheer will invaded your mind and so your limbs, flooding you with adrenaline, and so you took off, leaving him no choice but to follow. You learned quickly how to run on your injured leg, numbed yet weak as it was- as long as only your toes struck the floor, and not your heel, your knee didn’t force you to the ground. 

And finally, some good luck came your way. 

Grievous had left your saber in the room you had awoken in. Relief hitting you like a wall, you strapped it to your waist, but with that relief came a crash of your adrenaline, and suddenly you couldn’t even stand. Anakin caught you before you hit the floor, and tried to guide you again, but your feeble steps turned into toes dragging on the floor behind his footfalls. Soon he conceded and pulled your arms over his shoulders, and ordered you- ‘hold on’. 

Your grip was loose around his neck, but you managed not to slip off. 

You were bloodied, and bruised, and your knee didn’t quite work. The 2-1B droid aboard Obi-Wan’s ship called it a hyperextension- a stretching of your ligaments. And the cuts were deep, but nothing that couldn’t be fixed, even if red lines would accent your neck and face for quite a while. 

And Anakin didn’t leave your side, even as Obi-Wan insisted you just needed to sleep. 

A lifetime ago, before the Clone Wars, before you’d even had a light saber, you were taught a different code. One that, you could see now, was meant to ease children into the absolute, the black and white, that they weren’t yet ready for. 

It was this code that you felt still held true. You were barely a knight, barely even an adult, fighting a war for politicians who would never see the pain it caused. You fought it beside the true love of your life, the one thing you would die without, die for, and you felt his heartbreak when he looked upon your blood, and your heart broke the same each time you heard his pain. 

Emotion, yet peace.

You would do anything for Anakin Skywalker. You would fight a nonsense war you didn’t believe in, if it meant you could do it at his side. 

Ignorance, yet knowledge.

You knew not what truly guided this war, and it meant nothing to you. You knew what you needed to know, for the time being.  

Passion, yet serenity.

Anakin was half asleep at your feet, the couch just long enough that while you laid lengthwise, he could curl up in the final bit of space. You would do anything for him, anything, you’d follow him to the end of the universe. You loved him more than you could describe, more than there were words in all the languages of the galaxy, more than there were stars in hyperspace. You only hoped he knew it. 

Chaos, yet harmony.

Nothing was black and white- only a Sith deals in absolutes, and you were a Jedi. There was no harmony without chaos, and if it hadn’t been for everything going wrong, then you wouldn’t have been able to illustrate to Anakin, and him to you, the way that each would die for the other. Grievous lives to fight another day, but so do you.

Death, yet the Force.

And each day, you wake up, when the odds tell you you should have died long ago. You wake up, and have the honor of seeing and loving Anakin Skywalker, and feeling his love just the same. You wake up knowing that even though this war would one day fall into the history books and someday be the one question a youngling can’t answer on their history exams, you were calmed with the knowledge that you were on the right side of it. You had been brought to Coruscant, to fight for the light, to believe in it, to love it. 

Maybe the Force was with you, after all. 

-🦌 Roe

[likeholymary]

— one with the force

the phantom menace ii: 4.6k words

AU: What if the Clone Wars never happened, but instead Darth Sidious cast aside the Rule of Two, forging a new way for the Sith and began amassing an army of Sith warriors to overthrow the Jedi and the Republic?

A/N: (not my gif) (excerpt below is from The Clone Wars: Wild Space by Karen Miller, slightly altered to fit the story). hello beautiful friends! the beautiful gif credit goes to @pixelahsoka. this chapter has a LOT of content so just keep that in mind! also, kind of cheesy ending but whatever, hehe. also, yes, to confirm, obi-wan and rhea are a force dyad. however, it will (hopefully) be better than the sequels, bc i felt like it just came out of nowhere. their romance will be a slow-burn to them actually accepting it, with them still being at least semi-romantical along the way, so look forward to that! this chapter is filled with a lot of fluff, and a very angsty ending. this is the last chapter set during the phantom menace, so the next chapter will be set during attack of the clones, where most of the AU aspect will begin to pick up! comment below or send me an ask if you would like to join the taglist and be notified about the upcoming chapters! again, i am so grateful that you are even reading this, and if you feel compelled to do so, please reblog this post so your mutuals can read it as well! i love you all:) masterlist

mentions: death, blood, fighting, MAJOR angst, force connection, sadness.

The Master and Apprentice began their departure from the Jedi Temple on their Naboo, and Obi-Wan did not think it wise. 

Not after the Dathomirian man had appeared on that Maker-forsaken dustball with a red lightsaber, which only meant one thing – the Sith had returned.

He breathed in the pale glow of the planet’s moon, not taking time to look up and watch the stars glitter above, instead making short strides behind Qui-Gon, the shadow of the Naboo ship creeping its way across to cover them in more darkness, further darkening Obi-Wan’s mood and attitude towards the continuation of this ill-fated mission. 

Having just left the council’s chambers, he felt immense frustration, not only at the council, but at his Master as well. Not only was he ready to face the Jedi Trials which the council seemed to be denying him the right to, now his Master was all too eager to take on the latest lifeform they had picked up on their Naboo adventures, a boy believed to be the Chosen One by his Master.  

Not only was the boy too old, but Obi-Wan could sense it just as the council had – a great fear was buried deep within this Anakin Skywalker. A fear that was all consuming, and was growing slowly within him since they had left Tatooine and the boy’s mother behind.

Why could his master not sense it as he and the council did? Did he just assume ignorance for the possibilities to witness the forthcoming of a prophecy? He never understood his Master’s obsession with the old Jedi prophecies. It was an area of interest he sorely lacked, something that he felt put a strain on his relationship with Qui-Gon, something he realized that Qui-Gon probably wished Obi-Wan was intrigued by, but both of them knew that their Master-Apprentice relationship would never be like that of Dooku and Qui-Gon. 

Rhea, however, had been Dooku’s apprentice and shared a similar, if not less, affinity for the supernatural and old ways of the Jedi. Perhaps he could pay her a visit once his mission was completed, or even send her a message over their datapads like they used to before they got increasingly more busy as padawans. 

Surprise began to grow in him when he saw Rhea standing on the platform beside the ship. She had been waiting on him. As Qui-Gon began to speak to Anakin privately, Obi-Wan ran over to her with a small grin on his face. He should have known she would be here, for every time he simply thought of her, it seemed she was always nearby, as if she were watching over him.

“What are you doing here?” He beamed.

Obi-Wan couldn’t help but notice the blush dusting her cheeks, even in the shadow of the ship. 

“I couldn’t just let you leave without saying goodbye, now could I?”

“You said goodbye to me before the council meeting.”

Rhea rolled her eyes, groaning in annoyance before she began to simper quietly, punching him in the shoulder. “Well, yes, but I couldn’t give you this in front of the council, now could I?”  She held out her arms, opening them in anticipation for one of their rare hugs. When they were younglings, it was of course more sociably acceptable for them to embrace, however as the years began to pass and after many scoldings from each of their masters, they hid it away for special occasions or the few moments they would ever share alone, which were few and far between.

Obi-Wan buried his face in her shoulder, breathing in the sort of meadowy scent she always seemed to carry, as if she were the greatest meadow within the galaxy, filled with thousands of flowers constantly doused by the warm air and golden sunshine, only to be damped by a cool spring rain. She was a wonder, in his eyes.

Rhea’s arms wrapped around his neck as he lifted his head so he could carefully place his chin on top of her head, ever so sweetly. She equally breathed him in, sighing as she inhaled the overwhelming musk of rain, leather and perhaps even some old oak and a few of his dusty books. He always did become overly invested in his new findings, nose deep in his studies, but she wouldn’t have it any other way.

The two stood there for but a moment, taking every part of each other in as if it were the last time they would see each other, and to Rhea, she felt like it was.

“Promise.. promise you’ll come back?” Obi-Wan pulled away, simpering down at her with a twinkle in his eyes.

“When have I ever not?”

Rhea scowled for a second, her face quickly softening once more. “Just promise me, you idiot.”

“Fine, I promise you, dearest.”

She rolled her eyes at the nickname, breathing out a short laugh, before launching herself further into his arms, her fingers lacing through his shortly buzzed hair. Now for this, well, she wasn’t sure what Master Windu would have to say if he saw her like this, but she knew that it would be a deep scolding. It seemed so stupidly forbidden for her to just be lacing her fingers through his hair, but she paid no mind to the Jedi Code in the moment. 

Rhea was his dearest, and he her Ben, and yet, the pain of the loss of her Master still fresh on her mind, reminded her why she could not become attached to this overly-complex relationship the two padawans shared. 

It’s time to let go. 

And yet, she couldn’t. And neither could he.

╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗

Obi-Wan Kenobi sat on the Queen’s ship while they flew through hyperspace back to Naboo. It seemed such a foolish idea to be returning to the invaded planet, but he did as he was told just as he always did, and followed the willful lead of his master. They were but a small force, two Jedi, a Queen and a handful of her people. What could they really do? If the Sith really had returned, could they really defeat them as well as an entire army?

The Queen had suggested they call upon the aid of the Gungans, but Obi-Wan questioned if that would work as well. The Gungans seemed to have a deeply seeded hatred for the people of Naboo, as it was obvious that in the past the former had treated the other like insolent fools. He wasn’t sure that he could disagree after spending so much time around Jar Jar Binks.

A light bit of laughter echoed in his mind, and it sounded like Rhea. He must have just imagined talking to her, Rhea giggling at his comments and avidly agreeing while coming up with her own quippy comment.

Obi-Wan could not help but miss the girl.

Alone in his small room aboard the ship, he tried closing his eyes so as to meditate, folding his hands together as he crossed his legs, breathe in, breathe out.

But she was still there.

Get out of my head.

He thought almost mockingly, knowing that she surely couldn’t be listening to his thoughts from such far a distance.

Why don’t you get out of mine, Ben?

Obi-Wan was shaken. There was absolutely no way-

I’m still here. Could you help me get out? You’re thinking about me too much, and I’m a little offended that you’re annoyed of my presence.

Obi-Wan then snapped his eyes open, and there sitting in front of him was none other than his dearest, greatest life companion, Rhea Illyria, with a smile of a thousand stars.

╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗

Rhea Illyria sat on her bed in her quarters inside the Jedi Temple, breathing in, breathing out, as she performed her daily morning meditation. She knew many other padawans and younglings who hated the act of meditation, but she found it rather peaceful, a time to focus on the energy of the Force, to feel it moving around her and all other life forms.

She, however, became momentarily distracted by the thought of Obi-Wan Kenobi and his departure back to Naboo. She sighed, wishing she could have gone with him. There was something in the Force, something that felt like a warning about the planet of Naboo, and those who invaded. No, not the invaders... The ones controlling the invaders, pulling the strings. Who were they? The Sith? Or was it something... something much greater and evil in all forms and aspects?

Rhea worried for Obi-Wan and his mission, and she couldn’t help the thoughts consuming her not only of the danger of his mission, but of the padawan and their untold and unseen embrace. 

However, there was a nagging feeling in her gut. The Force pulling her towards something... No, someone.

She could just reach out, and suddenly her eyes were meet with the galaxy, planets dancing by as the stars glimmered all around her. She was walking among them, slowly, as if moving through the tides of the deepest oceans.

Breathe in, breathe out. What is the Force pushing you towards?

Rhea could see something ahead, a silver shape slowly getting closer as she continued to wade her way through stars and the black dusts of the galaxy.

Someone was thinking intensely. Someone was annoyed.

She couldn’t help but giggle at the notion of the Gungans being quite unintelligent creatures, or at least Jar Jar Binks, the creature someone was thinking about.

The closer Rhea got to the shape, she noticed it took the form of the ship from Naboo, the ship that carried its queen, the ship that carried him.

Someone was Obi-Wan.

This had to be some dream, she thought. She must have drifted into some sleep while she was meditating. But at the same moment she drifted through space, she breathed in, and could feel the sheets of her bed curl around her fingers, sense the starflower in the corner of her window, could smell the caf she so desperately needed each day after her meditations.

Despite trying to refocus on her true surroundings, Rhea became lost in the stars once more when something pushed back against her.

Get out of my head.

Rhea huffed, and began to more faster, willing the stars around her to move, to allow her closer access to the ship. She continued to wade and move through slowly, yet determined.

Why don’t you get out of mine, Ben?

She could feel his confusion, and despite her own, she couldn’t help but find some joy in this strange place. How she was able to drift through the stars to the other padawan was certainly not a normal occurrence among the Jedi, nor within the Force.

He couldn’t believe she was there either. He was thinking about her, thinking about how he missed her, which tugged at something within her she had never noticed before.

Her fingers finally grace the cool metal of the ship, however, they moved through its surface, and she was able to pass through, allowing the Force to guide her to her dear friend.

At the same time, he became frustrated by her presence distracting him from his own meditation.

I’m still here. Could you help me get out? You’re thinking about me too much, and I’m a little offended that you’re annoyed of my presence.

She was no longer floating within the ship, and instead now found herself grounded, sitting cross legged across Obi-Wan.

╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗

“Ho-how are you even here? I must be dreaming, there is no way that this could possibly be real. I mean, have you ever read about Jedi being able to communicate with each other over vast distances such as this? This is simply impossible!”  Obi-Wan rambled, tugging at his chin, brow furrowed as his mouth gaped slightly at the sight of Rhea.

She however, rolled her eyes, unamused this time by his consistent desire for the knowledge of just about everything. This had to be under the category he loved the least, and she treasured the most – the supernatural ongoings of the Force.

“Ben!” She finally shouted, smacking him on his forehead to get his attention.

This brought Obi-Wan to attention, but also caused both padawans to touch their forehead and hand respectively.

“How did you do that!” “How did I do that?”

Rhea and Obi-Wan were, to say the least, perplexed and befuddled by the situation before them. Obi-Wan, deciding the best course of action was to hypothesize how this anomaly could have occurred in the Force, decided they should each ask one another questions regarding just how this had happened.

“What were you doing when this,” he motioned between them, “happened?” Rhea bit her bottom lip, furrowing her brow just as he had. “I was meditating. It’s morning back at the Temple, so I was doing my morning meditations...” Obi-Wan’s hand remained on his chin, his forefinger rubbing incessantly across his upper lip. 

“As was I. Continue, please,” he spoke so softly, she almost wondered if he was trying to be quiet so no one would hear them and come looking.

“Well, my meditations were interrupted by thoughts of you.” Obi-Wan paused his menstruations, his eyes darting to meet hers.

“You were thinking about me?” 

“Well, yes–” “Why?” She grew flustered, a growing pain pounding in her chest, sharp and yet harsh. Her hands began to sweat as she started to wring them out like some old tunic on washing day, her eyes swooping to avoid his ever piercing-blue gaze.

“I don’t know, why were you thinking about me!” She retorted.

It was one of the few times Obi-Wan got speechless and she could not help but gleam with pride at catching his tongue. She knew this trait would probably die with age, the older her got the further he became closer to the title of a silver tongued master, however she knew she would look back on this moment and know she had trumped him at his own game.

“I–” However, he never got a singular thought out, as Qui-Gon began to shout Obi-Wan’s name like he were some incessant father trying to find his son after a long game of hide-and-go-seek.

Obi-Wan cursed under his breath, a moment of panic coursing through him, but when he looked back from the door to Rhea, she was gone, and he once again was alone, feeling a strange and overwhelming sense of sadness.

╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗

Rhea tried to continue her day as usual, but her gut instinct inside of her told her that there was something more to her apparent Force projection than it just being that. No... she knew there was something more to this event that had just occurred in not only her life, but Obi-Wan’s. Everything felt like it was going to change.

Unfocused in her training with Mace Windu, he scolded her throughout the day, noting her lack of focus and charging her with consistent complaints about her lack of balance. 

How could she feel balanced? How was she supposed to feel balance after she lacked control over her own capabilities through the Force? How could she feel balance when it had alluded her since the day her Master abandoned her for a life without her as his apprentice? 

How could she feel balance without anyone there to guide her? “The Force, guide you, it will.” 

Rhea nearly ran over Master Yoda who now stood in the Temple’s halls in front of her, smiling just as knowingly as he had every day she could remember. 

“Master Yoda, I didn’t see you there.” “Loud your thoughts are. Many things on your mind, are there not?” 

Rhea could not help but feel guilty and caught. Surely though, Master Yoda could be the one to help her. She had so many questions weighing her down, aching to be asked, and yet she felt ashamed to even think them to herself. Now, it seemed that there were those who were listening. 

“Master, I just feel so lost.”

Yoda hummed, chuckling to himself as if he held all the secrets of the world to himself and would just become amused by the ongoings of the beings around him.

“Come with me, you will.” Yoda motioned for her to follow him, as he guided her toward the meditation room. He sat down on a small chair meant for younglings, and she sat adjacent from him, not really knowing if a meditation session was going to help. After all, it’s what got her into this conundrum.

“Close you eyes. Focus not on your surroundings, but the Force.”

Rhea breathed in, breathed out, closing her eyes as she began to let go of her surroundings, allowing them to fade away. 

“See what is in the Force that troubles you, and tell me what it is.” 

She wasn’t sure if she should reach out again. What if she connected with another Jedi like she had with Obi-Wan? But surely, that would not happen. She had been thinking of him, just as she was now.

Images then began to flow through her mind. A beautiful green planet under siege by the droid armies of the Separatists, a cloaked man with a red lightsaber watching over her as she slept, Dooku the day he left her without even looking behind, her connection with Obi-Wan earlier that morning, him falling...

“I see the droid armies invading Naboo.. A Sith watching over me. Dooku leaving the Jedi Order.... and..”

“More there is?”

“Yes..” Rhea whispered, but she couldn’t focus on the grainy voice of Yoda. She kept reaching out, as if pulling the Force towards her like a rope, trying to yank it so it would release all of its secrets it was holding from her.

And into the Force she fell.

Everything around her was blurry, she couldn’t focus on anything except the strength of the Dark Side coursing before her. It was Obi-Wan. And he had given into all of his anger and hatred, an overwhelming tsunami of darkness coating every inch of him and not it began to creep upon her, splashing her with the emotions flowing out of him.

No, he cannot give into this. She thought, watching as he fell into the pool of darkness waiting to swallow him whole.

╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗

His master was dead. 

Obi-Wan watched as Qui-Gon crumpled to the floor, and he screamed in agony as he was trapped behind the laser shield, hopelessly witnessing the death of his Master.  And he could not help the growing rage and hatred that began to engulf his entire being, becoming greater with each second as he practically jumped, ready for the laser shield to move so he could slaughter this hunter before him, this Sith, this darkness.

His face twitched, his mouth curling downward into a snarl, complete loathe shining in his eyes which now darkened as he turned his gaze upon the Dathomirian. 

The Sith trailed before him like some wild beast waiting for its prey, stalking like some dark creature.

A moment before the laser shields even began to move once again, Obi-Wan ignited his lightsaber, seconds before a red bladed lightsaber was ignited as well. The shields moved, and Obi-Wan raised his saber, going to strike the beast of red and darkness down, going to strike for the kill out of the rage and hatred in his heart.

The darkness was consuming him, but Obi-Wan did not care. How could he care now? His master was dead, and this creature seemed a powerful foe within the Force, something that should be put down for the sake of the Republic and the safety of its citizens.... something that should pay for its crimes against the Jedi, it’s crimes against him.

He blocked every twist and twirl it made with its lightsaber, blocking its attacks by pushing back against it with more fervent and less coordinated attacks. If he could only strike it down... 

Obi-Wan lifted his lightsaber, slashing through the center of its double-bladed saber, cutting the pieces in half as one went out. He flipped over the creature, slashing at his center and sorrowfully missing him by an inch. 

This creature was quick, but he had to be quicker, he had to be. What would his Master say if he failed him? What would Rhea say if he were to fall, just as Qui-Gon had moments ago? He would not dare break a promise to her.

The creature kicked him in the face, but he did not let it affect him, instead holding out his lightsaber in front of him, looking for the best place to strike him down.  As their blades locked, Obi-Wan gritted his teeth as he pushed against the creature, his eyes glaring deeply into those sickly-yellow ones, now pushing down against his blade. Anger filled him, and rage too, however, the Sith lifted its hand, using the Force and propelling him across the room, and into the shaft. Obi-Wan grabbed ahold of a light as he began to fall, holding on for dear life as the Sith once again began to trail above him, stalking like a creature in the night. He watched helplessly as it kicked his lightsaber down into the shaft, the weapon, his life, now falling down just as hopelessly as he felt. 

Obi-Wan had to keep on holding on. He had to get back up there, he had to avenge his Master’s death. 

No.

As the Sith caused sparks to rain down from above onto him, attempting to get him to lose grip and fall, Obi-Wan could hear her speaking to him.

Do not give into the darkness. Do not give into the anger or hate. Rise above.

A second voice this time came.

Trust only in the Force.

Qui-Gon.

Rise above. 

And for a moment, Obi-Wan closed his eyes. Rhea was there, almost floating before him, but he couldn’t see anything around her, only she was in his mind. 

I will stand together with you. Rise above. 

“It occurred to Obi-Wan then, with a clarity that was startling, given the dark side hurricane howling through him, that Yoda was wrong about the dangers of attachment. Or at least that he wasn’t altogether right. It was true that attachment could weaken a Jedi’s resolve. But it could also strengthen it … as he was strengthened now by his love for Qui-Gon, and Rhea. Without them he would have failed long before this moment. And so, leaning on them, he continued to fight.”

And so, Obi-Wan opened his eyes, using the Force to propel him upwards as he jumped, landing behind the Sith and now focusing his energy, not through the Dark Side, but now back through the Force, allowing it to guide him now. Qui-Gon’s fallen lightsaber now flew into his hand as he landed, and with a swift movement of his wrist, Obi-Wan cut through the Dathomirian man, ending the terrors he had caused, as he fell down the shaft, thus causing yet another fall in the rise of the Sith.

For a moment he stood and just breathed, thanking the Force for his strength found in his love for his Master and friend.

Obi-Wan, sensing his Master’s lifeforce still flickering within him, ran to his side, cradling his head as gently as he could, holding onto some form of hope that his Master could still live. 

“It’s... it’s too late.”

“No, no!” 

“Obi-Wan..” Qui-Gon croaked, as best he could, the color draining from his face slowly, marking him with death as his lifeforce continued to flicker, dimming with each passing second. “Promise... promise me you will train the boy.”

“Yes, master..” Obi-Wan wept in response. Qui-Gon raise his hand to wipe his tears, and Obi-Wan rested his cheek lightly against his finger, wishing that this wasn’t the end.

“He is... the Chosen One. He will bring balance. Train him. Help him. You and Rhea must help him....”

Obi-Wan now momentarily forgot his grief, filled with confusion at the mention of his friend. 

“Rhea and I? Master, what do you–”

“There is more to the prophecy than what you know..”

“What, Master, I–”

Qui-Gon hushed him, before uttering his final words. “Train him.” He uttered his final breath, and Obi-Wan, cradling him, felt as if he were destined for some infinite sadness.

╔═━────━▒ ۞ ▒━────━═╗

Rhea supposed Naboo was a truly beautiful planet, one to behold amongst the galaxy, but it seemed so bleak and somber now with the death of Master Qui-Gon Jinn. 

She watched the pyre his body laid upon gather with flames that rose to meet the stars in the sky, the smoke dancing among the small lights glittering above.

Standing beside the young boy from Tatooine who introduced himself as Anakin Skywalker, she listened silently to the loss of sound in the Force that was Qui-Gon’s lifeforce. They all felt it, the small darkness that passed over them at the loss of such a wise Jedi.

Obi-Wan stood on the other side of Anakin, who looking up to him, asked, “What will happen to me now?”

“The council has granted me permission to train you. You will be a Jedi, I promise.”

Rhea still could not believe that Obi-Wan had not only become a Jedi Knight, but had also defeated and killed a Sith lord. How they had come to rise again, was still a mystery, but it caused a shroud of confusion and chaos to flow through the Force.

It was hard for Rhea to muddle through, her mind now more clouded and confused than ever, the events having transpired seeming to all be connected — Dooku leaving the Order, the Chosen One supposedly being found, the Sith returning, her bond with Obi-Wan...

It all seemed too obvious in her mind to not be connected, but Mace Windu continued to tell her to be mindful of her thoughts, even if he didn’t know of her bond with Obi-Wan, he still saw her point of view as a quick jump to conclusions.

As the procession ended and people began to filter out from the area of the funeral pyre, she stayed even as little Anakin left along with the other Jedi, staying by Obi-Wan’s side, just as she had promised.

“You’re still here.”

He said, nonchalantly, not even bothering to turn to face her.

Rhea looked up, turning her gaze to fixate on his face. He looked... tired, almost old, held down not only by exhaustion but by the overwhelming sense of loss and sadness which was now being carried by the duty he felt to honor his masters final wish.

“Just as I said I would always be. Right by your side.”

He sighed, turning to look down upon her, his blue eyes meeting with her darker ones.

“So, you really were there, speaking to me.”

“I suppose I was.”

The two were silent for a moment, simply staring into each other’s eyes as if understanding everything they wished to say. Rhea reached up, cupping his cheek softly as tears began to fall down his face.

She then got up on her tippy toes, being much shorter than him, and placed a slow kiss on his forehead, soft and lovingly and holding every hope she had within her.

Obi-Wan sighed softly, “We can’t tell anyone about this bond. Not until I have figured out what exactly it is.”

“We.”

“What?”

“Not until we have figured out what exactly it is. We’re in this together. I told you this already, but you don’t seem to be getting it through your thick skull. I stand by you. Always.”

[pixiedane]

Fic Writer Review

Thank you for the tag, @ussjellyfish ! I don't know whom to tag so I will just say to all of you: TAG, you're it (scroll to the end to copy paste the questions).

how many works do you have on AO3?

187

what’s your total AO3 word count?

373,260

how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

The count is 74, but they're not wholly individual (lots of "all media types" for example). I have pseuds for Star Wars (68 works), Star Trek (63 works), and Marvel (18 works). There are 38 works in other fandoms including Leverage, Killjoys, Harry Potter, The Hobbit, House MD, Game of Thrones, Once Upon a Time, Law and Order, Peter Pan, Willow...

16 more questions beneath the cut.

what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

512 kudos, Let's Go Steal a Family (Leverage), 2044 words | The Leverage team decide they don't need to settle down in order to start a family.

This was written for the "Leverage-a-thing-a-thon" run in August 2015 (making this fic almost exactly six years old). It's about found family in the most literal sense.

415 kudos, catch a glimpse of sunlight (Star Wars), 2324 words + a fanvid | What if Anakin listened to Padmé more than Palpatine and Obi-Wan listened to Anakin more than Yoda? tldr; galaxy saved

Created for the 2016 Star Wars Rarepairs exchange, a canon divergent au where Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Padmé work together to take down the Chancellor and raise the twins as a triad.

253 kudos, and a softness came from the starlight and filled me full to the bone. (Star Wars), 726 words | Luke wants to know about his mother.

Written for PadMay 2018, for the prompt "How should Padmé be remembered?". Wow, I'm surprised this is in the top five given it's a tiny ficlet in a giant fandom written for a challenge I made up myself. But I'm pleased! Padmé deserves to be remembered, that's why I started PadMay.

247 kudos, Serendipity (Star Wars), 1914 words | That time Padmé accidentally walked in on the wrong naked Jedi.

Another ObiAniDala AU written for the Star Wars Rarepairs Exchange, 2018 in this case. Two years earlier I'd made a random photo manip of Natalie Portman and Ewan Mcgregor drinking tea and it eventually inspired the fic.

221 kudos, Your Beating Heart Tonight (Star Wars), 3121 words | Padmé develops feelings for her other Jedi protector.

And another written for the Star Wars Rarepairs Exchange in 2016! And also another AU based in a storm of emotions between Anakin, Padmé, and Obi-Wan. I have a specialty.

All five of these are about family first and foremost. Three and a half feature polyamory. Three and a half are canon divergent AUs. None breaks 3200 words. All were written for an event/exchange.

do you respond to comments, why or why not?

For the most part. Sometimes I don't right away and it becomes awkward. And I generally don't respond to negative comments because who needs that.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Probably Abduction, a mirror universe story vaguely inspired by The Handmaid's Tale. My author's note: "It is not a happy story for anyone and implies the extreme emotional abuse of a child, as well as the coercion and torture of adults."

do you write crossovers? if so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I love crossovers! I've completed a few and have fifty more in wip folders. The most ambitious is War of Stars, a Star Wars/Game of Thrones fusion with 26,480 words, thirty chapters, and five different povs (Cersei, Anakin, Daenerys, Ahsoka, and Boba). Niche, but I am very proud of how it worked out.

I've also blended Star Wars with Mad Max, Kelvin Star Trek, Star Trek Discovery, Deep Space Nine, Sleeping Beauty, and Black Widow.

have you ever received hate on a fic?

I've had a few mean comments but they're basically "I don't like this pairing and I want you to feel bad about writing it" and I won't.

do you write smut? if so what kind?

No. Just not my thing.

have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I am aware of.

have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, I've had a few translated into Russian, which just adds to the headcanon that I'm secretly Black Widow.

have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, back in the LiveJournal days I wrote many thousands of words with @vasnormandy. I am slowly posting those stories to AO3 under my Marvel pseud Amelia Danvers, my OC and main character.

what’s your all time favorite ship?

An impossible question because I multi-ship like my life depends on it. Anakin/Padmé is my most prolific ship followed by Rey/Ben, Kat/Lorca, and Carol Danvers/Peter Parker (the parents of Amelia above). But I've written alternate ships for all of the above.

You can read more about my shipping interests here.

what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Oof. I have a lot of WIPs that I would like to finish but it's hard to get back to.

what are your writing strengths?

Dialogue. Introspection. I'm good at writing a specific point of view. Characters addressing their issues. I like to pull at threads so I've built up those skills. I love mixing and mashing fandoms and pairings. Complex relationships and the discussion thereof.

what are your writing weaknesses?

Action, like sex scenes or fight scenes, and anything plot heavy. I'm more interested in character and it shows in my writing.

I am also terrible at follow through and finishing things. It's why so much of my fic is written for challenges with external deadlines.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I'm not fluent in any other languages and I wouldn't want to do it without extensive research.

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

Either Star Trek (TNG, mainly the adventures of Beverly Crusher - as a preteen, at the Academy, as a single mom, and because I'm me I also gave her a Romulan lover) or Star Wars (the adventures of Han and Leia's daughter who was ME but also Jaina Solo before Jaina Solo existed because she was a twin who wanted to be a pilot more than a Jedi). These stories were written on notebook paper in colored pen and I'd do dramatic readings in the backyard, in costume, with only the trees (all of whom I'd named, mostly after heroines in books, like Elizabeth, Jane, Anne, Alice, Mary, etc.) as the audience.

what’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Well, the one I imagine as something more is Pas De Deux, my Jedi Dance Academy AU. I can picture the senes in my mind and I really enjoyed the adaptation process, melding two things I love into one. The characters and events are recognizable, but also very different and that's something I enjoy.

Questions for anyone who wants to complete it:

Fic Writer Review

how many works do you have on AO3?

what’s your total AO3 word count?

how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

do you respond to comments, why or why not?

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

do you write crossovers? if so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

have you ever received hate on a fic?

do you write smut? if so what kind?

have you ever had a fic stolen?

have you ever had a fic translated?

have you ever co-written a fic before?

what’s your all time favorite ship?

what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

what are your writing strengths?

what are your writing weaknesses?

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

what’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

[meilas]

Top 5 Villains (+1)

Thanks for the tag, @daydreamingpersephone! I’m going to go ahead and translate “villains” into “antagonists” because that’s how I roll.

1. Erik/The Phantom (Phantom of the Opera)

I mean, this is pretty obvious.  90% of my tumblr posts are about this show.  The Phantom makes me cringe (mirror bride,) shake my head and sigh (mirror bride,) and cry (mirror bride Final Lair.) Would probably bang.  How can I not when he does things like this:

2. Loki (Thor/Avengers)

I have to say that the Thor movies are really not the greatest.  The Warriors 3 + Sif (Warriors 3 + Sif? Really? Is she not a warrior?) are underused and a joke.  I haven’t read the comics, but if you’re going to have all these characters in a movie, and claim that they’re friends with the main character, let’s see a little more interaction.  And I really hate Thor: Ragnarok (too much going on, too many characters that I don’t care about (Grandmaster, Valkyrie, Hela, and Korg,) Loki was relegated to buttmonkey status, and Korg was stupid and pointless (a much better movie IMHO would have taken place on Earth and involved teaming up with Dr Strange and Wong.)  My favorite Loki movie is the first Avengers movie.  (No, I haven’t seen Infinity War or Endgame, why do you ask?) Loki, like so many of my other favorite characters, had a crappy childhood.  He wasn’t the favorite child (unless we go with the headcanon that he was Frigga’s favorite.)  He was adopted as a baby by the Supreme Ultimate Viking Space Dad, Odin, and raised to hate the race that he is a member of.  That’s pretty fucked up. I just want to wrap him in a blanket and give hot chocolate.

3. Astronema/Karone (Power Rangers in Space)

One of the few lady villains that I like.  She has an interesting backstory; she was kidnapped as a child and raised to be the Princess of Evil.  She is also, in a way, the damsel in distress, as her brother (the hero and main character) is trying to save her.  Melody Perkins goes from hammy and cute in the first half, to vulnerable, to icy and hot in the second half of the season. 10/10 would bang.

4. Evil Queen/Regina (Once Upon A Time)

Another one of the few lady villains that I like.  Regina had a crappy childhood because her mom was... not nice.  Long story short, Regina became the Evil Queen of Snow White’s story because she was in love with some guy, and Snow White, thinking she was helping, blabbed to Regina’s mom, who then killed Regina’s boyfriend, and made Regina hate Snow White for a very long time.  Eventually, Regina cast a curse on everyone, which kicked off the events of the show.  Eventually-eventually, Regina joins the side of good. Would willingly have my heart removed for her.  Also boobs.

5. Darth Vader/Anakin Skywalker

Well, considering this was the first villain I cried over, and I was four years old when I first watched the series in 1996 on laserdisc.  Yes I’m old.  Vader was the most complex character I had ever seen, and it really shook my worldview that such an evil person could do something so good because evil people do not do good things. Ugly crying every time.

BONUS

6. Missy/The Master (Doctor Who)

I liked Roger Delgado’s Master (Pertwee’s Doctor is my favorite classic Doctor) but I didn’t really care for any of the Masters that followed his untimely death.  (John Simm comes close, but he still wasn’t *my* Master.)  Until Michelle Gomez.  And then I was like “holy shit, the Master is a woman now and she’s really fucking cool!” and this is important to me because there have been so few lady characters that I have really really liked.  (The 13th Doctor is important to me for the same reason.)  And Missy eventually kind of maybe joins the Doctor’s team until she joins her crazy past self and then betrays him (yes him) and then she gets killed by her past self. Would bang, but Missy is a praying mantis and would probably eat me.

My favorite characters always either die, turn good (kind of) or turn good and then die.

Going to tag @kitkatwinchester​ and @from-aldebaran​

[faeriekit]

Luke Castellan PREYS on my Anakin Skywalker white boy complex and there is NO CURE. I'm going to die wishing someone had babied them harder as children before they had to be gutted like a fish For The Good Of Humanity™️ as an adult, which was the morally correct thing to do but GODS the wasted potential!!!!! The geek tragedy!! What worlds we could have conquered!!!

[letitrainathousandflames]

Hiya! I’ve seen you talking about ao3 a lot and up until recently I agreed with many of the posts you’ve been reblogging, but I think you have a little bit of a misinterpretation about why people r presently pissed off at ao3?

Sure, many people (perhaps even most) are angry for the usual puritanical reasons that you’ve been discussing, and I agree that for the most part fiction is fiction and idc what anyone does so long as I can filter it all out. You do you and all that.

But the most recent swell of criticism is bc ao3 has refused to take down rpf (real person fic) smut of minors—not fictional characters, real life children who happen to be particularly popular right now. The specific fic that spawned recent outrage is about a minecraft YouTuber/Twitch streamer who’s 16 years old, but obviously there’s many more which include his friends and other similar instances of rpf involving children.

I don’t think it’s a slippery slope to set the boundary at “don’t write about actual living children fucking” and to pretend as if this criticism of ao3 is equivalent those who want to wipe out all taboo topics or troubling fics involving fictional characters is just absurd. These are real people, real children, who are directly affected by people sexualizing them, especially if it’s left unchecked and allowed to happen more and more.

I hope you can understand where I’m coming from. Again, if this were just the same fandom bullshit over again, I’d fully agree with your opinion; I’m telling you this in the hopes of informing you more about the situation.

Ohh I didn’t know about this particular bit. First of all, let me just make it clear - that’s the most disgusting shit I’ve ever read - and I’m a die-hard “let people ship what they want” person. This sheds a new light on the whole thing.

Personally, i never liked the concept of real person fic. I see a lot of fics about bands like Rammstein where the members hook up and whatnot just as characters in fic do and not only it is not my cup of tea, it actually squicks me.

I wasn’t part of the Dan and Phil fandom generation but i do remember hearing about them being super uncomfortable with people shipping them, as I would be if I were a vlogging with my friend and people suddenly started writing stories about us falling in love/kissing/having sex ect etc.

The thing is, I don’t know if messing with the tags is even an effective form of protest - Ao3 already had a nearly finished, now released new skin that hides excessive tags. Anyway, that’s not the point.

It’s a complex situation. Older fandom people remember and dread events like the strikethrough - tons of stories lost forever because the “think of the children” crowd didn’t want anyone reading or writing smut fics about anne rice’s vampires or something, mainly driven by homophobia.

The Ao3 was built to be a space safe from censorship, and I, as an author of themes such as torture, abuse, gore, etc, am glad that my work won’t be suddenly pulled out thanks to their team of lawyers and their flexible terms of use. I believe that their issue with censoring these works is falling into a slippery slope of “ok so if you blocked rpf now you have to ban other ‘wrong’ content such as noncon/dubcon, abusive relationships, etc etc.” and then suddenly you can’t write anakin/padmé content anymore no matter how OOC bc he choked her to death in canon.

I have no answers for this particular conundrum. Like, me, personally, I would ban rpf. It’s in poor taste and there are actual living, breathing people whose lives could be affected by that. If I found a fic where someone had written my bff and I having raunchy, explicit sex, I would feel awkward being around them.

The whole ship-and-let-ship policy means - at least to me - “let people write what they want, these fictional characters are fictional and therefore they don’t care” and that argument just doesn’t hold up when it comes to rpf.

TL;DR (bullet points for easier reading):

Real Person Fiction is objectively harmful, character fanfic isn’t.

Yes, I get that being traumatized makes one want to write dark shit to process their pain. Been there, done - and still do - that. BUT if I write the billionth fic of Bucky Barnes getting tortured/maimed/raped there isn’t a real life Bucky who’s gonna read it and be grossed out of his mind or possibly traumatized. Thats the difference between fic and rpf

I don’t think fucking with the tags is an effective form of protest. No, I don’t know what is, but i have a few thoughts:

Maybe not giving reads, kudos or comments to this kind of fic is a start. Reporting these fics upon finding them outside of Ao3 (i.e: on twitter), too.

Report any and all attempts to send these fics to the kids themselves, they shouldn’t have to see/deal with this crap (seriously, have y’all learned nothing from the whole avengers mess, where ppl would send graphic porn art to the actors??), don’t do that shit! Aside from being abusive and gross, that’s a whole ass fucking CRIME. These are kids!!!

I guess it’s more or less this. I hope this gets sorted out soon. As I say, I would rather if Ao3 just removed the rpf option of their website. After all fanFICTION is supposed to be written about... well, fiction. Not real people, much less children. Yikes.

[magicalforcesau]

Dancing With Ghosts in Your Garden~ Chapter 18 - Year 2: February

(ao3 link)

In lieu of the incident with the sleeping draught, all prefects were mandated to enroll in Professor Palpatine’s brand new weekly Potions seminars. As the misstep with the Vitamix potion along with Maul’s nearing presence showed, it was ideal that all prefects be properly trained in the event that professors were once again subdued. This, they felt, combined with Professor Fisto’s ongoing dueling club, would prepare them.

Obi-Wan’s doubts of how prepared they could possibly be for something so unpredictable grew stronger with each day. Although he was already enrolled in the advanced potions class, he would never deny the opportunity to learn more. If anything, it would at least offer more practice.

“Given that it’s February, I figured it best we start with a common favorite amongst the masses of troublemakers,” Palpatine’s shoes clicked on the ground as he paced at the front of the room.

From what Obi-Wan understood, Palpatine didn’t receive any punishment for the accidental sleeping potion brew. Yoda had, of course, received a rather scathing howler from the Ministry at his supposed flightiness, of which he took the blame for. It seemed Anakin had stepped up and claimed it was he who accidentally knocked the draught in the already brewing potion.

That all certainly added up and did not help Anakin’s reputation amongst his peers.

“Any guesses to what that would be?” Palpatine asked, eagerly taking in the small crowd of Hogwarts’ best with expectant eyes.

Because this was a class full of prefects, each were considerably decent students and wanted to learn. There were exceptions, Obi-Wan realized as he looked over to a nearly snoozing Zeb, but they were outliers.

“Love potions?” Breha Organa said rather dreamily. Obi-Wan didn’t need to turn around to know she’d been looking at Bail as she said it.

“Right you are, Breha!” Palpatine smiled, “Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world, at that. Many of you and your students are for the first time diving into the wondrous and mysterious landscape that is romance. Some of you aren’t even aware that you are.”

Did he look at Obi-Wan on purpose? No, that would be silly. Palpatine always took care to rove eye contact throughout the classroom. It was a sufficient method of maintaining focus and Obi-Wan knew this, but he still shifted his gaze immediately elsewhere like he’d been caught copying homework.

“Love and potions aren’t all that different, really.” He continued, “The right and organic combination makes a fruitful and prosperous brew. The wrong and inauthentic combination is bitter and not made to last.”

“And if you’re not careful, you could end up with a wrinkly, scrawny little creature.” Zeb added knowingly, earning a few chuckles throughout the group.

“As if you’ve got anything to worry about there.” Caleb muttered, and much to Zeb’s dismay, acquired a more popular response.

“Boys, please.” Palpatine chastised, “I don’t want word to travel that Gryffindor’s prefects lost them points.”

“Cody would have an aneurysm,” Satine whispered and Obi-Wan only nodded in response. It was no secret to either of them that their friend was less than pleased with how bleak Gryffindor’s odds of obtaining either the House or Quidditch cup were becoming. If he heard that Caleb and Zeb worsened those odds, neither would be awaiting a very pretty conversation.

The troublesome two seemed to recognize this and justly shut their traps.

The class turned back to Palpatine, who seemed rather satisfied with the change in their mood and circled around the cauldron at the center of his desk. From it, emerged a pink fog that resembled a cloud at sunset and judging by the smile its scent drew from Palpatine, it smelled as pleasant as it looked.

“A love potion manufactures the deepest desires from the person who ingests it, manifesting them all at once in an intoxicating fashion that causes them to see the intended target in a different light.” He said almost reverently, “Ironically, it’s called a love potion, when it should really be called an infatuation potion.”

“That’s because you can’t build love from a substance.” Satine muttered from beside him. “Try as some might.”

Obi-Wan stared at the cauldron. He’d heard of amortentia. Evidently, a cheap ineffective version was sold at Zonko’s in Hogsmeade, though he never took much care to notice. He didn’t know much about love, save for the fact that it seemed highly unlikely for anything to recreate something as complicated as attraction.

She raised her hand, “Professor? Aren’t love potions banned at Hogwarts?”

“That they are,” Palpatine said with crossed hands, “Though that’s not to say they haven’t been smuggled in before.”

“Why would they do that?” A familiar high pitched voice from the back called.

Despite his interest in the subject, Obi-Wan couldn’t resist snapping his neck in turning to see none other than Anakin Skywalker sitting at the back desk, looking incredibly small in stature next to Onaconda Farr. Farr, in his defense, looked just as confused by Anakin’s presence as Obi-Wan felt.

“What are you doing here?” Obi-Wan asked him, “This is supposed to be for prefects only.”

“Not to worry, Mr. Kenobi, I did grant Anakin permission to attend.” Palpatine answered before Anakin could muster up a smart response, “Anakin shows a real knack for potions and given the circumstances, I would say it’s best that he be included whenever he could be protected.”

Obi-Wan slumped back in his chair, feeling properly admonished. It wasn’t that he didn’t think Anakin was capable. It was quite the opposite, actually, but there was an order to these things and learning advanced spells before one was ready did not seem indicative of a sound idea. Anakin needed to learn the building blocks still, whether he believed it or not. Despite his talent, he knew there was an absence of maturity to handle heavy source material. Dueling was one thing, as there was an obvious precedence for it right now and it was typically taught to some degree during second year anyway. Teaching Anakin about love potions felt more like giving a dog a steak and telling him not to eat it. He could try to convince everyone that he was over his crush on Padmé all he wanted, but it simply wasn’t true.

“To answer your question, Anakin,” Palpatine continued, “When someone is too blind with desperation to see reason, they will do just about anything to acquire what they want. A love potion, while sounding frilly and fun, occludes all rational thinking from the person it's given to.”

“And typically, it’s not ingested voluntarily.” Satine added.

Obi-Wan frowned, thinking of the potentially dastardly effects such a tool could provide for a desperately lovesick person. It was no different than being under a curse, in a sense, because the poor sap trapped in such a state had no agency whatsoever.

“How does one tell if someone is suffering from the effects of a love potion?” Fenn Rau asked.

“Why, you see them every day in young and happy couples as you walk through these halls. They’re starry-eyed, flushed, unspeakably happy, practically in a trance.”

“How are we to tell the difference then?” Obi-Wan asked.

“These features tend to be a good deal more exemplified and elongated.” Palpatine said, “For instance, while the honeymoon phase is technically normal, it’s really not meant to last. There’s also known to be loss of memory in the person as the potion begins to fade. We advise that you all keep an eye and see if you notice any excessively clingy and almost controlling couples.”

Obi-Wan thought about his parents, finding it very hard to believe they ever had any semblance of a honeymoon phase. They were so professional all the time that he’d rarely seen them even smile in the other’s presence. Of course, he was always splitting up sneaky couples that tried to sneak off to snog, so he supposed he did have some experience witnessing what Palpatine was referring to. Part of him was having a difficult time reconciling with the fact that it was their ancient potions professor who was explaining to them the complexities of romance.

“Because of the dangers that this possesses,” He waved a little pink vial around for all to show, allowing the light to catch it in a way that made it sparkle, “I believe it’s important that you understand these properties quite well and that you take care not to share this information outside of this room.”

There was a warning tone to his voice that was rarely used and Obi-Wan swore everyone sat up even straighter, though he doubted that was possible for Satine, who already appeared quite alert.

“It’s okay to take notes, of course, right?” Hondo asked from the other back corner of the room opposite to Anakin.

“Yes, but-” The older man did a double take as he whipped back around, “Hondo, what are you doing here?”

Obi-Wan thought it was fairly obvious what Hondo was doing and why he was suddenly so apt to take notes. He hadn’t thought to say anything when he originally saw him, seeing as if Anakin was invited, maybe he’d thought to include another unexpected guest. Hondo was possessed for a significant amount of time, after all.”

“Just trying to perfect my recipe is all.” Hondo had the gall to shrug, “What’s so wrong about that?”

“You mean besides intruding upon a meeting where you are not welcome and admitting in advance that you intend to sell an illegal substance throughout the school?” Palpatine asked, “I suppose we could discuss your time management skills, seeing as you have plenty of potion’s homework that you could be catching up on.”

Reading the room for a change, Hondo sighed like a great disservice had just been done to him, “You can’t fault a guy for trying.”

“Actually, I can. 15 points from Slytherin.” Palpatine crossed his arms, “And I expect your essay on Felix Felicis on my desk tomorrow morning.”

“My tutor isn’t going to like that.” Hondo grumbled as he walked by Obi-Wan, “He’s not even finished my Charms presentation.”

“Why would you say that to us?” Satine hissed, knowing full well that they were now going to have to look up the legitimacy of Hondo’s new “tutor” in their dwindling free time.  

“I’m honest to a fault!” He shrugged as he fully exited the room and was promptly locked out by Palpatine. He even took the effort of using two padlocks to secure the job. To be fair, Hondo was quite slippery.

“Now,” He said as he clapped his hands together once, “Why don’t we get to the important part? Brewing!”

***

This was a colossal waste of his time, skills, and resources.

While Sidious normally enjoyed when the school devolved into chaos, he did not appreciate when it stood in the way of his plans. Right now, his former apprentice was the obstacle that could feasibly destroy everything he’d worked tirelessly to achieve, all before it could truly start.

He knew he should have killed him when he had the chance, but Azkaban just seemed all the more fitting for the murder machine to waste his days away at the hand of his own failure. He would not make that mistake ever again.

So, it seemed Sidious’ own interests aligned with the rest of his colleagues: get rid of Maul. It felt peculiar- to be on the same side as the enemy, but if he wanted to defeat them, he needed this loose cannon of a pawn to be decimated before it was too late.

And through it all, the putrid “open-minded” community only served to remind him why they needed to be brought to an end. In what world would enlisting the Potions professor to teach love potions be useful? How he managed to seem convincing, he was unsure, because there was no greater waste of time than the frivolous pursuit of love. Well, unless it was being manipulated as a fulcrum for change.

Even with as little soul as he had remaining, if any, he still found the smell of amortentia to be utterly arousing. They certainly wouldn’t enjoy to know what he smelled when he breathed in amortentia: fire, ash, rubble, stained blood.

They should be barricading, sending students out in troves to hunt the demon down, and utilize the muggle-borns as bait in a trap to be sprung. Maul couldn’t resist the hunt. He knew such instincts never changed, not even from the waning sense of purpose that Azkaban reduced men to.

Instead, here he was, giving a pointless lecture on the dangers of love potions. After which, they’ll have another practice dueling session with snowballs. It was pitiful. At the very least, they should be using stones. Children needed to learn pain at an early age. They needed to become so familiar with the sensation that they found home in it. In the hearth of that home, is the power that exists from within. Only then, can they prevail.

He glanced to the back corner of the room and felt his lips twitch. Between this year and the last, Skywalker was becoming quite acquainted with pain. He grimaced as he took in the rest of the lot, noting how soft they all were as they nervously discovered what attracted them when they leaned over their brewing cauldrons. At least he’d been able to kick that waste of blood Ohnaka out. He was spared of that particular headache, especially when just looking at the boy angered him to no end when he considered how deeply that botched experiment failed. Truly, that family couldn’t do anything right- not even when under hypnosis.

He had no doubts that Maul was scoping out the land, realizing just how weak these wizards had gotten since he was in school- that his lessons from Sidious had always reigned supreme and that no one stood in his way, save for Yoda and Sidious, himself. That would be disastrous if anyone witnessed a reunion between the two. They would know instantly.

Then again, if Sidious were to capture and kill Maul, he would only further his popularity amongst the simpletons that allegedly “ran” their community. Perhaps, there could be salvaging of this wreck. Tyranus need not be the only one to pull strings in the wake of Maul’s drama. It was only fitting, since Sidious was the marionettist and this was to be his show.

Not only that, but such a feat would certainly impress the boy, who clearly had a sound reason for disliking Maul. While Sidious loathed the concept of needing to work towards the trust and approval of a child, understood that in due time, it would be worth it.

Even if such a boy nearly killed them all with his own klutziness.

Sidious breathed a steadying breath, just barely turned away from any possible lingering gazes.

He moved over to his desk and opened the top drawer. He needed a drink.

***

Satine, like many of the curious girls in her year, had done fair research on the subject of amortentia. Apparently, it had ruined its fair share of marriages as well as mental health states, making it completely illegal to produce for private or public subsidization. It seemed, curiously, only the aurors could do so with Ministry approval. That, much to Satine’s confusion, was the case for many subjects.

“Because I would hate to have a bunch of little zombies in my class, we’ll just be smelling the potions today.” Palpatine announced.

Despite her knowledge that amortentia affected everyone differently, she still wasn’t quite expecting the drunk-like sensation that filled her up from head to toe as she took a deep breath in from the fumes that emanated off the surface. Everything around her seemed to move in slow motion and her chest rose and fell with the relaxed notion of falling asleep, except she simultaneously never felt more stimulated in her life.

She’d never known that you could smell so many wonderful things at once yet still differentiate them for what they were and more importantly, how it got her flushed in a way that made her shift in her seat.

New books, homemade apple pie, crisp fall air, the lingering remnants of a minty aftershave wrapping around her like a scarf…

She started out of her reverie, blushing too mad to even consider looking to her left no matter how curious she suddenly was. Her heart was beating out of her chest and if she wasn’t absolutely certain of the potency of amortentia, she’d have the decency to be more embarrassed. Instead, she willed herself to calm down and refused to breathe through her nose any further, no matter how warm she felt when she had.

While none of what she witnessed was news to her per say, it wasn’t like she made a habit of lollygagging and daydreaming in the middle of a classroom setting. It was quite disarming to be so vulnerable yet also so close to what (or who, for that matter) was driving her crazy to begin with.

“Problem, Mr. Kenobi?” Palpatine was suddenly standing in front of them, which was at least a little bit of a distraction.

A ringing in her brain wanted desperately to ask him what he smelled, but she felt herself frown deeply when she noticed Obi-Wan was leaning with his entire face in his little cauldron, trying desperately to catch a whiff. Surely, if he got any closer, he was going to accidentally inhale the potion through his nose.

“I might have brewed it incorrectly.” He muttered, echoing a bit from still having his head in the cauldron.

“Let me see,” Palpatine urged him to lift his head and under normal circumstances, Satine might tease him for the little creases that the rim brought to his face.

The professor raised his nose to the fumes that still wafted through the air and smiled dreamily. She wondered if they would ever know what he was seeing when he inhaled the scent. It was none of their business to ask, but she really couldn’t picture Palpatine being in love with anyone.

“No, no, it’s perfectly correct,” He said with the airs of residual glee, “Why?”

Instead of giving him a straight answer, Obi-Wan turned to Satine, “I think I need you to move.”

Any previous concern, as per usual with Obi-Wan, was replaced with a scalding sort of annoyance only reserved for him, “What? Why?”

As she held her own special adverse reaction to him, he had one for her that matched. His eyebrows furrowed as he gestured to his cauldron. Sometimes, he was far too serious for his own good, “As lovely as your perfume is, you don’t need to go so heavy-handed with it! I can’t smell the potion.”

Satine, who initially believed they were going to get into an argument, found that she had no points to be made, because all that came out of her mouth was a little puff of air. Palpatine, if she had the eyes to spare him a look, was equally as surprised, even if not nearly as emotionally invested in such a rebuff.

“What?” Obi-Wan finally asked, growing more annoyed at not being in on the punchline.

Everyone else was suspiciously quiet too, much to Satine’s growing unease, but she could hardly spare a thought other than to say, “I’m out of perfume, actually. I sent Copikla home yesterday so my mum could send me a new bottle.”

Instead of being annoyed, the clouds seemed to clear, if only a little bit, and he flickered back to the potion, “But how-”

“-It smells different to everyone.” Palpatine, who looked between the two of them with his face stretched in discomfort and eyebrows raised beyond physics, clarified with a tone that was clearly meant for only them, “Based on what the individual finds attractive.”

All of the color seemed to wash out of Obi-Wan’s charmingly embarrassed face as his mind worked rapidly to wrap his head around that answer. Even though she hadn’t breathed in her potion again, Satine still swore she was suddenly feeling the effects of it.

“I- Well,” He tried to formulate a response, but to his credit, he had just admitted that he was at the very least attracted to her perfume (which she made the mental note to stock up on more frequently), in front of the entire class of prefects and Anakin.

“Oooooooh Obi-Wan likes perfume.” Anakin, while completely missing the point and a big teasing opportunity, shattered the tension that previously froze the entire room and everyone burst out into a fit of needed laughter. Even Obi-Wan laughed, though nervously, as he flashed Satine the occasional glance here and there through lowered lashes, as if trying to gage her reaction to this accidental admission.

She smiled. Clearly, it was to her benefit to read ahead of him.

“For what it’s worth,” She said in the midst of the uncontrollable chatter that erupted thanks to Anakin’s offhand comment, “You smell nice too.”

He blushed, which she found she quite liked the shade of pink on his face, “Thanks.”

It didn’t address the underlying implications, just as neither of them seized the moment to do so on Christmas Eve. She found it was just as frustrating trying to guess what was going on inside of his head as it was waiting for him to do something about the things she did know.

As much as she wanted the cat to be fully out of the bag, she knew the middle of Palpatine’s potions class wasn’t the time or place.

***

“I believe it’s a mistake to have any more Hogsmeade trips this year,” Qui-Gon said to his other heads of house and to Yoda, who was staring quite pensively out the window, “Not when we know what we know. It’s quite possible that Maul has an entrance to the school if he truly is behind what happened to Bultar Swan.”

“We have no real proof that he is, though.” Shaak Ti said, “It certainly doesn’t seem like his style.”

“While I know the usual term “innocent until proven guilty” is our mantra, I think we should consider being more hesitant with Maul.” Qui-Gon said.

“I agree,” Windu nodded, standing firmly next to him, “Though having more students out of the school would allow us a proper amount of time to sweep the school and see if he had any secret entrances.”

“We have that same opportunity at night.” Qui-Gon said.

“You know this school shifts and changes between night and day,” Palpatine said warily, “It is ever-moving and Bultar Swan was attacked in broad daylight in a common room.”

“Why are we not interviewing more Ravenclaws then?” Windu asked, “We’ve got to do something! Skywalker’s mother is missing and we all know that boy isn’t going to lay down and allow for speculation to simply rise without doing something foolish.”

“I don’t appreciate your assumptions of Anakin.” Qui-Gon said, “He’s a bright, even if impulsive boy, who is going through an unspeakable grief.”

“No one twice his age should have to endure what he’s going through,” Shaak Ti said kindly, “Let alone as young as he.”

“I’m not saying he has no reason to act out.” Windu raised his hands, “I’m merely stating that it is only a matter of time before he takes matters into his own hands.”

“That would make it easier for Maul, unfortunately,” Palpatine agreed, “Perhaps we should motion to shut off the Floo network?”

“Done that, I have.” Yoda spoke up, “Because used it, he did.”

“For what?” Qui-Gon asked eagerly.

“Unknown location, he accessed.” Yoda mused, “Unregistered through the network, it is. Talk to Dooku, I suspect.”

Palpatine frowned, “That can’t be good.”

“No, it can’t.” Windu agreed, “Can you extend your protective charms to Hogsmeade, Yoda?”

“Do that, I did, after we woke up from the sleeping incident.”

“Oh, so it’s safe then.” Shaak Ti shrugged, “The dementors haven’t detected Maul on the inside and he was last seen on Diagon Alley.”

“I’m sure this is quite exhausting for you, Headmaster.” Windu acknowledged.

It was true. Extending his powers over an entire settlement as well as the castle at all times would have drained any normal wizard to death. Yoda, as it were, was not a normal wizard. Even still, it was visible on his worn features that he was exhausted.

“Safe, the students should be,” He said instead, “But careful we will still be. Search the school we will for secret entrances while they are gone, we will.”

***

“Are they gone yet?” Anakin asked, ducking up from where he’d been digging furiously through his trunk. Rex who was sitting on the window sill keeping watch over the massive gates of Hogwarts nodded slowly.

“Yeah I think so,” He confirmed, stretching his arms above his head and yawning, “I dunno mate, don’t you think a nice Saturday in might be nicer than trying this again. Don’t you remember what happened last time?”

“Psh!” Anakin waved a hand, “Well we’re certainly not trying anything like that again. Although I would like to get another look at that sword.”

“I figured you’d seen enough swords in your short life,” Rex rolled his eyes, “Didn’t Dooku intend to sacrifice you with one?”

“It was still cool, but I’m not really trying to go to Hogsmeade, just give off a good impression.” Anakin shrugged before he pulled out his nicest T-Shirt, swiftly pulling the one he had been wearing off and switching them out, “Well how do I look?”

“The same but in green,” Rex deadpanned leaning his head on his hand, “If all we’re doing up here is playing dress up then I’d much rather get this show on the road.”

“Oh come on,” Anakin checked himself out in the dingy mirror on the back of the door. He was really hoping he’d run into Padmé; he thought she’d like it. He’d already seen her leave, but overheard her talking to her friends about Rabé meeting them later and taking the tunnels. His mum had bought it for him over the summer and he tried to push past the rising feeling of sadness, “We had to wait until all the prefects left anyways, I’m not really looking to be caught and dragged back here by any of them and especially not Zeb, who was eyeing us up pretty hard at breakfast.”

Rex shuddered, “Definitely don’t need him tossing us through the portrait hole again. It’s not our fault that the rest of the second years left without us!”

“I’d hate to see what happens if we’re caught alone of our own accord,” Anakin grinned, despite the true statement, such a thing wouldn’t stop them, “Well, let’s go before Windu gets here to babysit.”

“Right,” Rex grimaced, standing up and grabbing his wand. Anakin grabbed his as well, throwing it into his robe, it was much too cold to go around without it, and they headed down and out of the common room. He really hoped no one would snitch on them.

The two traversed the halls carefully. Keeping quiet for once to listen for approaching footsteps and ducking into a few empty classrooms to avoid the ghosts lurking around the otherwise empty halls. It took much longer than they’d have liked to make it down to where the tunnel’s entrance would begin. Luckily, the map showed Rabé’s little figure moving in that direction too, marking a bit of a clear path. She would lead them straight to Padmé.

Anakin’s heart rate increased for more reasons than being caught.

He thought better of it. Obi-Wan would probably kill him on the spot if he slithered out of the tunnel and into Hogsmeade. Not to mention, Maul was lurking around in the area looking for him. Maybe, if they caught up with Rabé in the tunnel, he could simply give her the necklace to give to Padmé.

It didn’t sound incredibly indicative of his house in terms of bravery, but he knew at least Obi-Wan would approve of his method.  

“Almost there!” Anakin grinned at Rex, but almost had his head knocked clean from his body when Rex grabbed his robe and yanked him hard into an empty classroom, “Wha-?”

“Shh!!” Rex was very much alert and his eyes narrowed as they both heard footsteps echoing off the walls. The footsteps paused just outside of the door and Rex cursed under his breath as a shadow moved towards the entrance. Rex glared at Anakin for a few minutes before mouthing, ‘You owe me!’ and straightening.

“Mr. Fett?” Palpatine’s confused voice echoed off the stone walls, “What are you doing here? And all alone?”

“Sorry Professor,” Rex gave Palpatine a rather over the top concerned look, “It’s just, I haven’t seen Anakin since breakfast and he did mention he was thinking about coming to see you.”

“To see me?” The professor sounded a little more surprised than Anakin thought he should, but perhaps he was trying to avoid looking like he picked favorites, “Well I certainly haven’t seen him. I’ll keep an eye out, but I’m going to need to escort you outside with the other second years.”

Anakin winced, of course even Palpatine wouldn’t be willing to overlook a student wandering the halls without an escort. He’d have to bring Rex back something good from Hogsmeade.

“Alright, thank you Professor,” Rex nodded, although he didn’t look very thankful in Anakin’s opinion.

Their footsteps faded away, but still Anakin waited a minute longer before darting from the classroom himself.

He wandered the empty halls, being extra careful to listen and flicker his eyes to the map. Rex was a little more perceptive than he tended to be. Anakin certainly didn’t want to get caught, but at least he knew what story to go with if he did.

Finally, he reached the entrance of the tunnel, looking around carefully, he quickly slipped inside and hurried to close the entrance, plunging him into complete darkness.

Anakin pulled his wand out, lighting it with a, “Lumos Maxima,” They’d been working to improve their maximizing skills in charms recently and Anakin felt it was paying off. The tunnels were rather boring and unremarkable. He remembered them being pretty long, though he’d never made it all the way to the end the last time.

He took his time, kicking away rocks and humming softly. He still didn’t want to give his position away if there was someone scouting the tunnel for mischievous students, but boredom without Rex crept in fast.

He paused a moment at an odd noise and listened hard. It was a soft shuffling noise and despite the echo, it sounded like it was coming from behind him. Could it be another student trying the same thing he was? Unlikely, most of the houses were pretty locked down outside. He wasn’t sure why the professors had been so insistent on a supervised snow day, but most students went for it.

That left the possibility that he was about to be caught.

Letting the fear of boring evenings in detention spur him on, he picked up the pace until he was running rather swiftly. With the way his wand was swinging, the light bounced around enough to make him motion sick so he gave it a quiet, “Nox,” not letting up on the speed of which his shoes pounded the ground.

He slowed when he nearly tripped over something lying on the ground, but wasn’t quick enough to avoid running right into someone.

Anakin fell backwards with an, “oof,” He tried to catch his breath for a moment, “Sorry, Rabé,” He said softly standing up, “While I’ve got you, I’ve got a question for you. Lumos.”

His wand tip glowed again, revealing him face to face with a student’s face frozen in a scream. This was not Rabé. Anakin stumbled back, tripping on what felt like the fabric of a scarf, before he saw the glint of eyes reflecting the light off his wand.

Yellow. Bright yellow eyes narrowing as they realized they’d been caught. Anakin felt his heart leap in his chest. Fear filling his lungs, causing him to nearly choke on a scream. He heard the eyes take a step forward and he scrambled to his feet and fell into a sprint. His wand light faded as his concentration waned and he shoved it into his robes.

He shouldn’t be running from Maul, because that’s who it was, of course. He’d vowed revenge even if Qui-Gon always gave him that sad sort of look when he said it. He should be back there giving that kidnapper a piece of his mind. He was the Chosen One, it was his job to save everyone and take down the bad guys.

Even as these thoughts played in his mind, he continued to sprint, fear pushing him into overdrive. He nearly screeched again when he ran full tilt into something human knocking them both to the ground.

“Bloody hell!”

“Rex!” Anakin was relieved to find someone he knew, but it wasn’t enough to stop the adrenaline that had him back on his feet and pulling desperately on Rex’s arm to get him to move, “We have to go now!”

“Great, I just escape Palpatine only to get caught again. Who is it? Windu?” Anakin nearly growled at the slow pace Rex was moving at.

“It’s Maul! We have to go!” That was enough to get him moving.

They didn’t stop to even breathe again until they burst from the wall and right into Professors Palpatine and Qui-Gon who nearly got bowled over.

“What-” Qui-Gon looked ready to start a lecture and Palpatine even looked like he was ready to dole out a few point reductions, but Rex cut them off quickly.

“Anakin saw him!” Rex was pointing his wand at the entrance to the tunnel like Maul was about to come out right then and there for a fight.

“Saw who?” Palpatine asked head tilting to the side in curiosity and Anakin nearly spat the name out as he joined Rex in his battle stance.

“Maul.”

***

The deafening screech that stretched from Hogwarts through Hogsmeade with painful clarity was one that very few students attributed meaning to. It wasn’t unreasonable that students, particularly younger ones, immediately leapt into disorder, running hither and yon, terrified they were about to be dive-bombed. It was a horrible sight to see, even if it didn’t make his job all the more difficult.

Designed with the vocal cords of mandrakes, the emergency siren was only used in times of utter duress and was a means of warning students and faculty to return to Hogwarts at once. Historically, it hadn’t been officially sounded since the early twentieth century. Even still, prefects were always trained on what to do in the event of hearing the siren.

All the training in the world still didn’t fully prepare Obi-Wan for the very real visceral reaction that the ear-splitting sound brought. Of course, he could not spare a single moment to think, a tough reality for a Ravenclaw, and immediately moved forward with what he’d been taught: gather his house, ensure they were all in company, and get them back to the school.

While not given a direct message with it, everyone seemed to share the same thought as he did. There was only one true reason that the archaic alarm would be used right now accompanied by the dementors that jetted across the sky: Maul was close.

Not only close, but likely in their midst.

Shop owners wasted little time in evacuating their premises and battening down the hatches, effectively snuffing the warm glow of Hogsmeade in a singular swoop. His brain was busy scanning the hysterical crowd that was amid constant motion, searching for every and any blue-robed student that he might come across. It occurred to him now that there was perhaps more meaning to the explicitly placed Hogsmeade dress code than the professors led on to. It certainly made rounding up students a lot easier when they were color-coded.

Moving around on the ice-laden stone walkways? Less easy. He’d not only had to catch his own balance in his haste, but many other wobbly students. Even Satine’s elbow was caught by him a time or two, of which she spared no time to thank him, though he knew otherwise she would. She was just as stern as him in their mission, practically grabbing students and sliding them across the way to the huddle of other students, hardly blinking in the process.

It was with this goal in mind that he was able to develop a razor focus that practically tuned out the alarm. That, or the pounding in his ears did a decent job of it. Silently, he found the space to be relieved that Anakin was safe back at the castle with the other younger students.

It couldn’t have taken more than a couple of minutes to successfully corral all of the students that lingered about. It wasn’t as though any of them truly wanted to sneak off, after all. The horror on everyone’s faces spoke volumes of their concern.

Each of the prefects did their headcounts rapidly, trying not to dawdle for a moment longer than necessary, all praying they reached the same number they started with. He felt capable of breathing again when Ravenclaw reached that quota. Gryffindor prefects, it seemed, had forgotten to include themselves for a moment, which briefly induced a panic that was quickly assuaged by an irritated Mace Windu.

Perhaps it was a bit presumptuous to be relieved that Mace Windu and Kit Fisto were the supervising professors that day, but it certainly helped their odds to have experienced fighters of dark magic alongside them. The sky grew dark above them, not from the descending sun, but from the mere presence of the dementors swarming together like an ominous storm cloud.

No one looked back as they were ushered down through the storm cellar beneath Honeydukes, which remained open only at Windu’s order.

“Move quickly, don’t linger, don’t stop, don’t pause!” He ordered in a booming voice that didn’t even need to be amplified with a charm.

While Gryffindor’s prefects had nobly volunteered to lead the charge of students down and through the tunnel, the others remained on the side, performing last-minute counts to ensure all made it safely while urging them to hurry it up. No one seemed to have a problem with performing the latter, but some were getting a little rowdy in the process.

“Hey, hey, this is not an excuse to push or shove!” Satine chastised a few overeager Slytherins, “The only way this works is if you work together!”

She was right, of course, but Obi-Wan believed it was falling on deaf ears. They were terrified and rightfully so. Perhaps they shouldn’t have allowed the Hogsmeade trip to occur in the first place with everything going on. It was almost like they were trying to lure Maul in. If that was the case, it was a very sadistic choice.

Padmé Amidala as well as her friends had been some of the last people to filter in, surprisingly, and tears stained their cheeks.

“Keep it moving, ladies!” Kit Fisto ordered.

“We can’t find Rabé!” Sabé, the girl who looked most like Padmé, cried.

“I’m sure she’s here somewhere.” Windu said, “Slytherin house reported no missing students based on their earlier count. Now GO!”  

“She came later!” Padmé insisted, pushing back against the hands of Fenn Rau, who was trying to make them descend down the ladder. “We never saw her!”

“Then maybe she never came at all?” Satine tried.

“She came.” Padmé looked between both of them, “I know she did! She wouldn’t flake out on us like that. What if something horrible happened to her? What if-”

“-We can explore these possibilities back at Hogwarts.” Windu said, “If she is indeed missing, I will waste no time in coming back for her. I promise you.”

“That is already a waste of time!” Sabé protested, “What if she’s hurt?”

“I cannot risk all of you, including these prefects, for one possibly lingering student. I need to get you back to safety. The tunnels will be locked behind us.” Windu said and waved his wand to provide a gust of air, sending all of the girls down the tunnel against their own will. Satine looked horrified at the choice and frankly, so did Windu for a moment, before he began insisting the prefects follow.

For Obi-Wan, time began to slow down as his brain methodically and almost mechanically traced back through that day, desperately trying to recall if he’d seen Rabé. She stood out among Padmé’s friends in that she was the only Slytherin and yet it was still odd to see them apart. Before the alarm had turned the world on its head, it had been a rather mundane and peaceful day at Hogsmeade. The weather had been nice, if not quite nippy. He’d popped into Tomes & Scrolls with Satine while Cody lingered around Spintwitches, but none of them bought anything. If they had, surely, it would have been lost in the chaos with many other student’s purchases.

He’d debated getting a box of every flavor beans, since Hondo said he had a game of Russian Roulette, but with the beans, brewing. Cody seemed interested and it sounded like less of a consequential gaming experience than Hondo’s usual ventures. He wasn’t afforded the opportunity to go into Honeydukes, but…

Obi-Wan felt his heart stop altogether in his chest. He hadn’t gone into Honeydukes, but he almost did. And who was lingering by the butterbeer stand when he was busy deliberating with Cody?

Rabé.

He’d only caught a glimpse of her for a fraction of a second before he turned around. Clear as daylight and standing at the far end of Hogsmeade. There were other Slytherins around her, but like Padmé, her hair was always intricately woven and this made her stand out.

Where did she go so that none of her friends saw her?

“She was here today,” Obi-Wan lurched forward, grabbing Satine by the arm on instinct.

“How do you know?” She began to ask, eyes searching his own with growing concern.

“I saw her.” He said and then shoved against the stream of students that were still pouring down the tunnel.

“Ben,” It was her turn to grab him, “Wait!”

He didn’t wait, though. Instead, he slipped out of her grasp, which had been firm enough to take his robe with it, and pushed through the crowd. Windu, never the slouch, noticed him instantly and his eyes widened as he realized what Obi-Wan was trying to do. Unlike Padmé and the girls, he didn’t give him the opportunity to stop him, instead lunging forward and falling into an immediate sprint out the door- the cold wind whipping his face so hard that it caused tears to freeze in their wake.

He vaguely heard his name shouted from behind him, but he could only think of finding Rabé before it was too late. It might have been impulsive and it was definitely foolish, but he wouldn’t be able to leave with a clear conscience unless he did everything in his power to bring every student back safely. He understood that the professors needed to do their duty, but Obi-Wan was to be an auror someday. Running into the line of fire was surely a requirement of such a field.

All he could think of was how he knew what it was like to be forgotten. If there was even a small chance of preventing someone else from befalling that fate, he had to try.

Running across the slick stone walkway proved itself to be even more difficult than walking had, but Obi-Wan was utilizing the forward motion that the ice provided him for acceleration. The sky above him was almost completely black- as though Hogsmeade was at risk for being sucked into outer space. Suddenly, the cold that Obi-Wan felt no longer seemed to be as a result from the climate.

He’d studied dementors a good deal over the years and objectively understood how they drained a person from their hopes and dreams, removing the parts of them that basically made them human, but he realized then that he never really knew. He wasn’t even the target for these dementors and just being in their presence made him feel like all color was depleting from the landscape.

He forced himself through it, focusing on the task at hand and what purpose that gave him. He decided to slide by the (now closed) butterbeer stand at the end, where he’d last seen Rabé. After all, it was entirely possible that he was the last person to see her alive. That certainly didn’t give him much comfort.

He turned his head from side to side, trying with a last stitch effort to see if she’d taken refuge in one of the closed shops. The keepers were kind and would more than likely house a lost student during a crisis such as this.

As dread pooled deeper in the pit of his stomach and his body struggled to fight off the shaky chill that climbed its way up his spine, he dared to look up, noticing that the dementors were no longer searching, but swarming. The snowfall only seemed to thicken, which was rather unfortunate as Obi-Wan had to swipe his arm over his eyes several times to continue seeing.

They congregated at the Three Broomsticks- in front of which, Obi-Wan did not stop, but in his haste, did meet the bloodshot amber eyes of none other than the Dathomirian known as Maul. In their midst, Obi-Wan found he would rather embark on a lengthy stay with a dementor than look another second into the killer’s eyes. He was leaning back in his seat with casual aplomb and raised his stein of butterbeer as though in cheers or celebration, selling the chilling lack of regard for life with a cruel smile curling his black and red lips.

It was if he was saying, “I’ve won.”

Obi-Wan swallowed thickly and averted his gaze immediately, understanding that this might be his final moment. If that were so, he would use it wisely.

“No, you won’t.”

Maul’s smile broadened, resembling the actual devil as he did so.

Yes, Obi-Wan was definitely about to die.

However, the moment ended as quick as it started, for once the dementors dive bombed past Obi-Wan and straight for Maul, he flipped a galleon into the air and caught it, allowing himself to disappear to whatever rock he dragged himself from before.

Obi-Wan only thundered forward until he arrived at the end of the limits of the town, sighing deeply and wincing at the wreath of frost that circled his head as he caught his breath. He was immensely cold and with nothing to do about it and worse, began to feel quite defeated. Part of him wanted to rationalize that Rabé did likely go back to the castle. However, whether it was intuition or simply an unknown magic in the air, he could practically feel the presence of another.

Then, from the corner of his eyes, he noticed something poking out of the snow- just next to an old townhome, and drew closer. His steps were heavy and without hopeful anticipation as he regarded the gray fingers breaking through the massive snowdrift.

He knelt down slowly, and raised his wand to blow away the piles of snow and ice and used his hands to remove the last remnants on his own. Attached to the outstretched hand, which served as much as a warning as it did a signal of distress, was the petrified gray face of Rabé.

***

“You have to go back for him!” Satine demanded as she was practically carried by Fisto all the way back to Hogwarts. It had been the only way they were able to prevent her from slipping after Obi-Wan in a panic-induced gut-reaction. She believed he was an idiot for running off the way he did, but that wasn’t to say she didn’t understand the feeling.

“The dementors are mobilizing, Satine!” Windu turned on her with fire in his eyes, “Had Mr. Kenobi not been so uncharacteristically impetuous, we wouldn’t be here.”

“And there would still be a lost child out there!” She growled, not usually one to ever speak to a professor so brazenly, but this was Obi-Wan they were talking about, and she would always be a bit irrational when it came to him. “It doesn’t seem like anyone really cares about that though!”

“Not care? I would lay down my life for every single one of you. Do you think it pleases me to know that not one, but two students could be suffering at the hands of that animal on my watch?” Windu said hotly, “But I cannot jeopardize the dementors potentially catching a murderous sociopath. Obi-Wan would not want me to do that!”

She knew deep in her bones that he was right, but she didn’t take to it any better, instead feeling bile rise up her throat- only subdued by the way it seemed to constrict at the wretched thought of losing her best friend. The cold weight of pure dread settled on her chest, evaporating her fury and nearly suffocating all logical thought.

Nearly.

She turned on her heels back to Ravenclaw house, who were staring at her with a mixture of sympathy and shock. Satine knew she had the capacity to lose her patience, but she tried to always do so with some semblance of professionalism.

“We’ll go find him ourselves then!” Cody, equally as heated as she had been, raged alongside Echo and Fives. All were still dressed for the winter and had their wands at the ready.

“You will do no such thing.” Professor Fisto pulled Cody back by the arm, “Headmaster Yoda is the only one who can save your friend now.”

“What was the point of teaching us all that stuff if we aren’t going to use it?” Cody fired.

“In the event that there is an inescapable situation, Cody.” Fisto said, “I commend your bravery, but there is a line between courage and stupidity.”

“So, that’s it?” Echo chimed in, “We’re just going to run and hide every time a bad guy comes knocking on our door?”

“Yeah, you’re supposed to teach us defense against the dark arts!” Fives added, “I’d say Maul qualifies.”

“Maul is much more than any of you can understand or handle.” Windu’s voice no longer spoke with anger, but from a deep place that teetered on remorse and pity. There was a defeated look in his eyes that Satine would never forget, as though Maul had already won.

“Glad you’ve all been effectively wasting our time then.” Cody snarled, “Propping us up and making us feel as though we’re really doing something all year. What has all of this been? Some show for the Ministry?”

A few other Gryffindors pooled around him and it occurred to Satine just then that if Cody hadn’t been so set on pursuing Quidditch as a career, that he’d make a mighty fine commanding officer. People rallied behind him. They believed in him.

She just wished that call to order wasn’t coming from a place of wishing to fight a dark lord.

“Cody, I highly recommend that you stand down.” Fisto said, “I get that you’re upset, but we need to remain calm. Take your brothers back to the Great Hall and wait for further instructions.”

Cody was teeming with anger- she could tell just looking at him and for a moment, she feared he was going to act brashly. Windu seemed to think the same thing judging by the appraising look he gave him.

He didn’t move, but he did send Echo and Fives back with the Gryffindor prefects and the rest of the house. The other houses and their respective prefects trickled afterwards, each going to the Great Hall for what was surely to be another lockdown.

“Great, another sleepover.” Fives huffed as he went.

“Yeah, telling ghost stories by candlelight altogether will surely keep us safe.” Echo complained under his breath.

“I thought I said-” Fisto began.

“-I’m not leaving until Kenobi is found.” Cody said, “Dead or alive.”

“Don’t you dare talk like that.” She seethed, grabbing his attention instantly and Cody, to his credit, did appear riddled with guilt at her reaction.

“Sorry.” He muttered.

“I expect this level of irrationality from Cody.” Windu said and eyed Satine, “But not you.”

“I’m not leaving either.” She said, clutching Obi-Wan’s robe tightly between clenched fists, “Consequences be damned.”

Where she thought there would be retribution or even more yelling, there was not. Fisto, of the two of them, actually appeared more upset. Windu, instead, nodded slightly. It seemed he understood that this was a battle he would not be winning today.

Satine scanned the area, remembering someone very curious to be missing from the pack. As if it were possible, more horror gnawed at her nerves, “Where’s Anakin?”

That was Maul’s whole purpose for scouting out the school, right?

Windu grimaced, “He did try to sneak out to Hogsmeade earlier.”

Her eyes widened, “But he’s alright?”

“It is to my understanding that young Skywalker is with Professor Jinn.” Palpatine swerved around the corner, dark cloaks flowing behind him dramatically as he reconvened with the professors, “Any update on Maul?”

“No,” Windu said tartly, “But seeing as our students have been debating on staging a coup, it might have been useful to have your presence, Professor.”

The tension, as it was, seemed unbreakable.

“My apologies, Professor Windu, but I will say these students have the right to be upset. All of our efforts to protect the school have thus far failed.” Palpatine said.

Satine also couldn’t blame everyone for being upset. In their effort to make everyone feel safe, they only propped them up with delusions of grandeur. There was a fine line to walk between keeping the student body informed and propagating debilitating fear- at least in this predicament.

“You’re here now.” Fisto said, “That’s what counts.”

Satine wasn’t so sure, but then again, Maul hadn’t broken in yet.

“Surely, it’s not wise to have students so close to the entrance.” Palpatine said.

“Yes, well, it also wasn’t wise to allow Anakin so close to your Vitamix potion.” Windu countered, “I guess we’re all doing things a bit differently right now.”

Palpatine seemed properly slapped by that, because there was little argument that could be brought up to counter the comment. That was, indeed, what happened and it left the school wide open for possible attack.

“Yoda should be back any minute.” Fisto paced the floor, his wet boots making a squeaking noise as he did so, “And hopefully, he has good news.”

“If not?” Cody asked.

“If not, we might have to help him and if that’s the case, you two will stay back.” Windu ordered.

Even Cody didn’t argue with that logic.

Not but a moment later, erratic banging came from the metal door, growing more desperate as the seconds went on. Palpatine leaned forward as if to open it and Fisto grabbed his wrist before he could perform the charm.

“There’s a password.” Fisto said.

“And why would Maul just come knocking on the front door?” Palpatine scoffed.

“Maul is anything but conventional.” Windu reasoned.

Cody and Satine looked between each other as the three professors deliberated. They were beginning to understand why it sometimes felt like it took forever for anything to get done. No one could agree on the simplest things.

“What if it’s Ben?” Satine stepped forward, “You’ve said it yourself that the tunnels are blocked off now.”

“Yoda would have found him and brought him back by apparition.” Fisto said.

“And if he didn’t?”

Windu opened his mouth to respond, but then from a familiar voice, “HELLO THERE? IS ANYONE THERE?”

She glared between the three professors, who were all a bit dumbstruck as they hastily moved to open the door. As it swung open unceremoniously, her heart resumed beating as Obi-Wan Kenobi, pale, drenched and speckled with snowflakes, practically fell through the entryway.

She moved on instinct rather than thought and caught him in a tight hug, combatting the sharp chill that traveled up her spine at his frigid body with the warm relief that he was alive. She only removed herself enough to tightly wrap his robe around his shoulders before pulling him closer.

“Get him some blankets!” Windu ordered while Palpatine was simultaneously brewing a warm beverage from thin air. Satine, for her part, could not let go.

“N-nice t-to see you t-too.” He shivered and did not reject the warm contact.

“You’re an idiot, Obi-Wan Kenobi.” She muttered into his shoulder, but it really didn’t have as much fire as she would have liked it to- not when he looked so pitiful with wet hair in his face, teeth chattering, and a nose and cheeks red from the cold.

“I’m aware.” He said.

“You could have been killed!”

“I know.”

“And you really couldn’t have at least brought your robe with you if you were going to go running off on a deadly mission?”

“You’re right.”

“Stop agreeing with me!” She leaned back and glared at him.

“My apologies,” He smiled ruefully, but it faded almost instantly, “All the trouble I’ve caused, I’m afraid it was for nothing.”

“What do you mean?” Fisto cut in.

“I saw him.” Obi-Wan’s voice was hollow when he said it. His eyes became downcast as he reminisced, “And Rabé. I couldn’t move her on my own… She was frozen in carbonite.”

Windu cursed, scrubbing a hand over his bald head, “And Maul?”

“Gone.” Obi-Wan said, “He used a portkey before the dementors could get to him.”

***

The dementors separated like parting clouds, allowing for remnants of dwindling sunlight to cast a yellow beam onto Hogsmeade. Even with the sunset behind it, the usually buzzing and quaint town looked barren without the lively folk that inhabited it. It was to their best interest to hide, of course, and he knew that once this awful storm passed, they would return again. Yoda moved slowly through the snow, feet unbothered by the crunch of the ice beneath him.

He had no doubt that Maul was here, but held equal assurance that he no longer was. His protective charms were supposed to stop people from getting in, not out.

He grimaced as he knelt to the Slytherin girl’s motionless body- frozen in time with a horrific expression painting her features. She would need to join the growing group that took up beds in Madame Nema’s hospital wing. He just hoped with everything in him that they could make this right.

It tugged at his heart that children always seemed to be the ones to suffer for the choices of adults. This one was not excluded as Yoda and the other professors deemed that it would be safe.

It should have been safe.

He cursed as he thought back to the extensive lengths he’d gone to in protecting the school. He was exhausted, constantly firing off on all cylinders to keep this place safe. Even Hogsmeade hadn’t been exempt from his reach.

Well it had, but it seemed the small window of Maul’s murder in Diagon Alley to Yoda waking up from the botched Vitamix potion was the hole he’d crawled through. The dementors hadn’t detected him, which was a whole other concern that he would need to investigate at a later time.

There were so many ways that they failed.

Yes, well, this girl’s parents will not enjoy a meager response like that, so he ought to think of something better. Either way, he would not be sleeping well for his hubris. Maul might not storm the castle with his being there, but he was not above dancing around it. He was boxed out for now, but there was only so much that could be done. He had managed to convince them to disallow apparition for the time being without Ministry approval. This combined with the monitorization of the Floo network, limited Maul significantly.

However, there were always portkeys, which was the most secure way for a person in hiding to quickly transport. You didn’t need a license for it and you didn’t even leave a trace on your wand in the process.

It seemed Maul was getting significant joy from toying with them by instilling fear. It was just like a dark wizard to play on people’s emotions as such.

And yet…

He looked back down at the girl with a different sort of befuddlement. Not that he was complaining, but why hadn’t he killed her? Was it because it would have drawn too much attention for his liking? That didn’t seem right, though, because he had no problem murdering the guards at Azkaban or that store owner on Diagon Alley. Why utilize this mysterious alternative method now?

It hadn’t been the first time, obviously. There was the first official occurrence in December, not to mention the carbon remnants found in Shmi Skywalker’s flat, and Obi-Wan and Satine’s discovery at the Shrieking Shack.

Maul had certainly developed a predilection for the long con in his time locked away in Azkaban. Yoda would say it was out of character if he didn’t understand how much a man could change from trauma. He’d seen it in his own face and he’d seen it in many other’s. Maul didn’t want to mess up this time. He wanted his target and he wanted it done right.

But why Anakin Skywalker? Surely, Maul didn’t buy into the Chosen One prophecy. And if he did, why the sudden malevolence towards the boy? Nothing from the ancient texts seemed to make any reference to Maul in the slightest. It wouldn’t have affected him in Azkaban.

Would it?

As Yoda waved his wand once to lift the casket of carbon from the ground to float aimlessly behind him, he turned back towards the castle, realizing not for the first time that the more he learned, the more he had to ask.

***

“We were worried you became a popsicle out there,” Cody said as he took off his own robe and coat to also wrap around Obi-Wan. They all sat in the Great Hall with the rest of the student body, each positioned on their own sleeping bag as they faced each other. Despite having been inside for over an hour, Obi-Wan still clutched the blankets that were given to him tightly and didn’t reject Cody’s addition to the pile.

“I’m sure he was more concerned about seeing Maul.” Satine said.

“I’m sure he was.” Ventress sauntered by with her trademark smirk painted on her black-stained lips.

“Come off it, Ventress,” Cody scowled, “Kenobi wouldn’t lie about such a thing. Dementors were there too.”

“They’ve been here the entire time, Fett.” Ventress said, “How many false scares have there been? I’m beginning to believe it’s all conspiracy, myself.”

“It’s that level of thinking that’s going to get someone seriously injured.” Satine said, “Or worse.”

“Maybe then someone will start to take legitimate action,” She sighed almost dreamily, like she was fantasizing about the possibility.

“And I suppose Rabé basically turning to stone was just nothing.” Cody barked.

“A pity, truly.” She inspected her fingernails, which were actually quite noticeably jagged and cracked with chipped black polish, “Have we not noticed that every victim has been pureblood? You don’t hear the Ministry talking about that, of course.”

“What are you getting at?” Satine growled.

“I’m just saying, Duchess,” Ventress displayed her best pout, which coming from her, still had all the appearances of a cat ready to pounce, “I would hate to see a group marginalized by their blood type.”

“Listen here, Ventress-” She clutched his sleeping bag tightly and was surely ready to fire off on a meaningful tangent of her own, but was interrupted by the sound of barreling footsteps coming their way.

Anakin and Rex came sprinting down the aisle and slid onto their knees towards where they sat. Anakin, for his part, skidded right into Obi-Wan and nearly knocked him over by the velocity at which he traveled.

“Where have you two been?” Cody asked.

“We were with Qui-Gon!” Anakin said and looked around to Obi-Wan, “Fives just told us about what happened at Hogsmeade and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Obi-Wan’s heart melted at the thought of Anakin’s concern and ruffled his hair, “Not a scratch on me.”

Anakin nodded in relief, “That’s good. It’s crazy that we both saw Maul today and he didn’t even do anything to either of us!”

Obi-Wan, Satine, Cody, and the briefly forgotten Ventress all snapped their attention towards Anakin in surprise.

“I’m sorry, what?” Satine was the first to speak.

“When and where did you see Maul?” Cody followed shortly behind.

“And you lived?” It was unclear whether Ventress was surprised or disappointed.

Obi-Wan, in all fairness, was still processing the small twelve year old boy, who presumably alone, faced the bloodthirsty killer that had it out for him. He knew he must have looked horrified, because Anakin’s own worry seemed to grow by just looking at Obi-Wan.

“I’m okay!” He said first, knowing that this was the most important thing, “And for the record, it wasn’t my fault.”

“It was a little your fault.” Rex winced.

“Rex! You’re supposed to be on my side!” Anakin whined.

“What did you do?” Obi-Wan pinched his brow.

“I already told Qui-Gon and he promised me immunity and while I don’t know for sure what that means, I’m pretty sure it means you’re not allowed to get mad.”

“That’s not what it means.” He said.

“Well, then, who’s got a decent ghost story to share?” He tried, looking around to each of them, “Ventress? I’m sure you’ve got some just by looking in a mirror every day.”

“Anakin…”

“Fine…” He sighed, “I… Might have sort of tried to go give Padmé her Valentine.”

“Of all the foolish and impulsive things to do!” Obi-Wan roared instantly.

“You said you wouldn’t get mad!”

“No I did not!” He snapped, “Do you not realize how incredibly dangerous that was? And the kind of risk you were putting yourself at? What would have happened if he had gotten you? I swear, I know you’re young but you need to think in terms of the long-”

“-Mate, not sure you are in the best position to be giving that lecture today.” Cody said, “Seeing as you also ran right into Maul’s clutches.”

“Yeah, really!” Anakin defended, “I heard all about what you did!”

“To save someone!” Obi-Wan rounded on his friend, “Not to retrieve a pretty trinket for a girl I fancy!”

“Based on your taste that’s a good thing.” Ventress scoffed.

Satine, who was admittedly calmer than Obi-Wan, frowned and looked at Anakin, “What happened?”

“If I’m allowed to continue.” He said pointedly before going on, “I wasn’t actually going to go to Hogsmeade. Believe it or not, I’m not completely stupid.”

“You just said-” Obi-Wan’s voice cracked.

“-Ben, let him finish.” Satine admonished.

“Thank you,” Anakin nodded and the kid really had the nerve to look smug, “I wasn’t going to Hogsmeade, but Rabé was and believe it or not, I get nervous too sometimes. I wasn’t sure I would have the nerve to give it to her in person, so I was going to ask Rabé if she could give it to Padmé for me. So, I used the map to follow her, obviously, and was never going to leave the tunnel system. But then about halfway through, I saw him.”

“Maul?” Cody asked in awe.

“No, the boogeyman. Yes, Maul.” Rex rolled his eyes.

“Seems like the same thing to me,” Ventress yawned, clearly unimpressed, “Seeing as Maul can’t be in two places at once, I would say one of you is lying.”

“I’m not lying!” Anakin asserted and looked to Obi-Wan, “And he’s not either.”

“Rabé didn’t just turn to carbonite on her own.” Obi-Wan said.

Anakin’s eyes widened, “He got Rabé too?”

“What do you mean too?” Satine asked.

“I mean, Tiplee was also frozen in carbonite down in the tunnels. I only managed to get away because I must have caught him off guard. I ran as fast as I could.” He patted his pockets, “Dang! I think I dropped the map in the process. Again.”

“Seriously, no more of those for you.” Satine said.

“Not like it’ll be of much use now that Yoda is closing the tunnels again.” Cody said.

“That’s horrible.” Obi-Wan frowned and stroked his chin thoughtfully, “But I wonder why he wouldn’t have come into the school.”

“He’s afraid of Yoda.” Ventress scowled, “Everyone knows that, but clearly, he’s a fool to be leaving all of these little clues around.”

“There’s got to be a bigger plan at play here.” Satine said.

“Like what? Two Maul’s?” Ventress rolled her eyes, “I could see the creep going after Skywalker as that is clearly his primary intent, but Kenobi? Who would bother to go after someone who cowered at his own shadow at one point?”

The particular incident that Ventress was alluding to happened when they were only five years old, he might add, but even in his head it didn’t pack the same impact that she wanted it to. Instead, Obi-Wan flashed her a disapproving look.

“Rabé is a member of your house.” He pointed out, “I didn’t see you running back to save her.”

“Actually, I didn’t see you at all.” Satine added.

Ventress, nonplussed, rolled her eyes dramatically, “Good to know the two of you are still conjuring nonsense that would rival The Quibbler, but if you must know, I was tutoring in the library.”

“Wait a second,” Obi-Wan allowed some of the blanket to slide off of him when he sat up straighter, trying his best to suppress a shiver that immediately followed. He was grateful that Satine set it back into place, “Don’t tell me you’re Hondo’s tutor.”

Ventress furrowed her brow, “Be wary of the tone, Kenobi. My marks often rival your own.”

She wasn’t wrong. Horrible personality aside, Ventress was an exemplary student. Like him, she sort of had to be, given the reputation their respective families upheld.

“I wasn’t underestimating your intelligence,” He said, because he wasn’t a total fool, “But I never took you for a good samaritan.”

“Surely, he’s paying her.” Satine groaned as she leaned back on her hands.

“I don’t need the money, muggle-born.” She hissed.

“Since when has galleons been his only form of currency?” Satine shrugged, “Everyone has a price, is all I’m saying.”

“Fools,” Ventress shook her head as she walked away, “All of you.”

“Yeah, well, when you turn to stone, it’ll match your heart.” Anakin said and stood up, “I’m going to go apologize to Padmé.”

Obi-Wan watched him sadly as he walked over to where the crestfallen group of usually chipper girls huddled together. At least they were able to comfort each other in this trying time. Obi-Wan looked to Cody and Satine, who were both wearing a considerable amount of concern on their features.

He knew their responsibilities as older students and prefects, alike, were only going to rise as the fear and sense of danger increased. Anakin had nearly come to his end if he hadn’t been so quick on his feet. He supposed those dueling classes did have their uses if implemented properly. As it were, Maul would likely not make the same mistake twice.

***

The atmosphere was much more subdued than most Quidditch mornings. Even Cody found himself sitting quietly across from where Obi-Wan was falling asleep over a plate of pancakes. Ventress was the only one not subdued, she was glaring around at her team, snarling at anyone not paying attention to her. He didn’t think she’d get very far with an attitude like that. As captain, sometimes the best thing you could do was read the mood of your teammates.

Obi-Wan’s head dropped forwards almost landing in the syrup before Satine managed to pull him back without even a glance over. He blinked, looking around like he hadn’t even been aware they were in the Great Hall in the first place.

“Might want to eat something, mate,” Cody suggested, gesturing to his plate that he seemed surprised was loaded even if he had done it himself.

“Right,” He did so without another word. Satine looked fairly volatile this morning, having woken up extremely early for a morning patrol so there wasn’t much conversation for them to be had. He was tired too, having been picking up a few patrols of his own. Palpatine’s accidental sleeping potion may have been an unfortunate idea, but a few extra hands that could take on prefect duties were still welcomed. It’s not like Cody could say no after watching his friends be run ragged.

“You sure you’re going to be awake enough to stay on a broom?” Cody asked as they both watched a piece of pancake fall slowly off his fork. Obi-Wan just nodded looking up with a sigh.

“We’re all tired,” He nodded towards where Koth had passed out at the breakfast table. Aayla and Cin were awake enough to doodle on his face so it maybe wasn’t the entire team, “Hopefully this will make for a short game.”

“Hopefully,” He nodded, but he wasn’t sure he was honest in his statement. Ventress was looking especially poisonous this morning and wouldn’t take anything sitting down, “Maybe we shouldn’t be playing anyways.”

Obi-Wan and Satine both looked at him like he’d just grown a second head and he met their looks with a glare.

“Who are you and what have you done with Cody?” Kenobi squinted at him as if checking to make sure he hadn’t been cursed.

“I think hell must have frozen over,” Satine added with a nod, “I never thought I’d hear Cody Fett, not want anything to do with Quidditch.”

“Hey! Woah!” He shook his head quickly, “I never said that.”

They both raised an eyebrow at him and he rolled his eyes.

“Even I am not enough of a sports fan to look past the elephant in the room,” He jabbed his fork at them, “Maul’s close and we’re just going to take the whole school outside? Again? Plus, morale is down,” Instead of gesturing to the two obvious examples in front of him, he pointed to Koth, who had just woken up and hadn’t figured out why everyone was laughing at him yet.

“When you put it that way...” Obi-Wan flicked his eyes to the professors, who were desperately trying to keep warm inviting facades. He took a sip of pumpkin juice.

“Why go through all this trouble for such a barbaric game anyways,” Satine glowered, “We need a break from potential violence not more.”

Cody knew explaining the dynamics of Quidditch would not change her mind any so he kept his own thoughts to himself on the matter. He thought of Quidditch as a much needed break most of the time. But it was hard to deny the fact that only a few people would be having a good time today and that wasn’t how he felt a healthy Quidditch environment should be.

The screech of an owl alerted everyone to the arrival of the morning mail. It was always a little hectic, but it didn’t stop them from being able to spot one of their three owls if it chose to show up. The only owl Cody could recognize was a large tawny one. Well manicured and, if memory served, sharp talons. Obi-Wan barely avoided getting his letter dropped on his head, his hand flicked up to catch the falling parchment with deft precision. As most letters from his parents, he was careful to shield it so Satine couldn’t see, something that always had her frustrated despite knowing that it was fair given the nature of these letters.

Obi-Wan read the whole thing in lightning speed, eyebrows furrowing the further he got, although he nodded before swiftly depositing it on the table next to his plate. His owl swooped down again landing on his head causing him to wince.

“Alright message received,” He tried to pick up the pesky owl, but it looked rather indignant to be manhandled. Still because he was gentle and fed him a bit of breakfast, the owl allowed itself to be set on his arm, “Tell them they’re early,” He tried saying it quietly enough so neither of them would hear, unfortunately they were both rather intune to his voice. If an owl could show emotions, which Cody had, up until this moment thought untrue, Obi-Wan’s owl would look almost melancholic for a moment. A hard thing to do for a bird that had permanent angry eyebrows colored into its feathers.

It took off in a hurry, nearly taking off a few heads as it went and disappeared back into the flock it had arrived with.

“What did they say?” Satine asked, as she usually did, but he just shrugged.

“Nothing out of the ordinary,” He gave her a smile, but she frowned.

“That never makes me feel better,” She told him sternly. He just shrugged.

There was a loud pop and they all looked up to see Palpatine and Qui-Gon standing at the head of the Great Hall, the two of them would be escorting both teams outside and to the pitch. It was best to have an experienced teacher at the helm and who better than those who had earned their titles as Heads of House.

Obi-Wan stood swiftly, accepting their well wishes and good lucks, before falling into line behind Eeth. Satine was watching them leave with narrowed eyes and Cody wasn’t sure what was going on, but she certainly looked much more focused than earlier. She slid her hand across the table, snatching the note from where he’d left it, clearly for the trash pile, and spread it open.

“Should you do that?” He asked even if he was curious himself, he wasn’t about to get accused of reading other people’s mail.

“It’s a suspicious piece of parchment I found unattended,” She lied as she peered down at it. Her nose scrunched up in disgust as she read it just loud enough for him to hear.

“Obi-Wan Kenobi,

As you are about to turn 17, we remind you once again of your duties and expectations. In one year you will turn 18 and we’ll discuss then your future. Despite your best attempts to undermine our plans we will do what we can to work around your failure.

Don’t expect a gift this year, you received one last year and we’ll be happy to give you one when you turn 20. Consider continuing to go to school despite your constant disappointments gift enough.

-Mother”

Cody felt the grip on his fork tighten as he stared a hole through the paper. A correspondence with Obi-Wan’s family really was never pleasant, but did they have to be so outwardly despicable? What surprised him most was the excitement lighting up Satine’s eyes as she read the letter over again.

“Brilliant!” She grinned and he practically snapped his fork in half.

“What’s so brilliant about those two bastards continuing to tighten the noose around his neck?” Cody growled and Satine looked up, having the decency to look aghast.

“Oh heavens no,” She looked sick at the thought, “That’s not what I was referring to at all. How could you think-?”

“-How could I not? Maybe hell is freezing over,” He ran a hand down his face as she rummaged around in her bag before shoving plates and goblets out of the way, nearly toppling a few over. She set down a massive book-like object with a white exterior and silver rings. It was full to the brim with pages and she opened it up excitedly.

“It’s a binder,” She told him at his look before moving on to what must have been the important thing at hand, “You know how Ben’s rather dodgy about his birthday?” Cody nodded, “Well I’ve been tracking him ever since 2nd year,” She flipped around in the binder and Cody could see so many color-coded graphs it made his head spin.

“You did this? For what?”

“If he won’t tell us, I’ll find out on my own,” She glared sternly at a picture of Ben that blinked up at her from the page, “That’s what I told him,” She flipped through it, pointing at various sections, “I was able to surmise that his parents tend to have a letter pattern. They only send him mail on major holidays or if he’s done something they disapprove of.”

“When is that not the case,” He muttered.

“I was able to narrow it down after a few years to February or March,” She was in the back of the book now where a calendar full of crossed out dates sat, “It was confusing, sometimes they sent him a letter end of February like this one,” She waved the letter at him, “Sometimes it was in March. This is the first time I’ve been able to read one,” She grinned proudly tucking the letter into the back pocket for evidence purposes.

“What good does that do? They didn’t say what day it was,” Cody studied the calendar in interest.

“It does a lot of good!” She pulled a fancy highlighter from her bag, “He said they were early, meaning it can’t be any of these dates,” She ran her finger through most of the month. They only had a few days left until March though, maybe she’d figured out the month, “Most importantly!” She looked at him face as serious as it was when she was taking her OWLs, “They said they got him a gift last year-”

“Yeah a ruddy gift,” Cody frowned, “What good is an antique quill if it doesn’t even work?”

“I agree,” She said impatiently, “That’s not the point. They said they’d get him another one when he turned 20. He turned 16 last year-”

“Your point?” Cody was beginning to get lost and would rather she hurry up her point than leave him thinking.

“He doesn’t have a birthday this year at all!” She announced and Cody straightened, staring at her in shock.

“Well that’s not possible!” He declared, “Everyone has a birthday once a year! Even those who don’t care much like Kenobi.”

“It is possible!” She grinned proudly drawing a line on her calendar right between the 28th of February and the 1st of March, “He was born on February 29th! A leap year!”

Cody blinked. That actually made a lot of sense. Kenobi wasn’t a liar and he was sure he’d asked about specific days and been told he was wrong. He’d only seen Kenobi get a birthday present their first year (a pack of gobstones) and their fifth year (the aforementioned broken antique quill). Cody had just figured they wouldn’t ever figure it out unless he told them himself, so he usually just tried to get him a good Christmas present every year. He had noticed Satine had started to give him a present around this time of year, but now they had the exact day.

“Does this mean his parents use that as an excuse to never get him anything?” He frowned and Satine angered instantly.

“I’m almost shocked they haven’t forgotten the date themselves.”

“So,” Cody looked at the little highlighted line indicating the fruition of 5 years of work, “What are we doing about it?”

***

“I still say we should have gone with March 1st,” Cody said from where he was balanced rather precariously on a ladder taping the end of a streamer, “Then we’d be celebrating him having turned 17.”

Satine, who was holding onto the ladder to make sure she didn’t have to take anyone to the hospital wing today, glared up at him, “Absolutely not! He has a February birthday, we’re celebrating it in February. Otherwise he’s going to assume we’ve forgotten it!”

“He doesn’t even know we know it,” Cody rationalized, but came down from the ladder anyways to admire his work with her.

“Alright,” She looked down reading her list. She’d had years to plan this event, he’d never had a party before that she knew of and she wanted it to be perfect, “We’ve got the streamers and the balloons. The guests have been told what time to arrive...” She checked off the boxes as she went, “Can I trust you to go and get the cake without dropping it?” She looked up at her friend and he grinned giving her a thumbs up.

“Oh yeah definitely,” It didn’t instill in her a lot of hope, but he was at least eager to do it.

“Alright go, but hurry!” She checked the time off the clock in the corner. “They’ll be here soon.”

“On it!” He saluted her and raced out the door.

Satine observed her surroundings once more. They’d chosen an empty classroom rather than something elaborate like the Great Hall or too intimate like Qui-Gon’s office. She’d gotten approval, Qui-Gon was to arrive any minute now to supervise. He’d been the only professor she could think of that would understand how important this was to do. She was sure if she’d talked to Windu or even Headmaster Yoda, she’d have gotten shot down before she even began. Qui-Gon knew about Ben’s family though and like her, seemed to want to give him the best experience he could.

There was a spot for the cake on the teacher’s desk as well as plates, utensils, and napkins. The ceiling was practically drowning in streamers of all different colors and balloons were floating around aimlessly. Her and Cody’s presents to him were sitting in a neat pile on a couple of tables pushed together. She hoped he’d get a few more, but hadn’t explicitly said anything on the invitations. It was rather short notice after all.

“You’ve done a wonderful job,” She turned to see Qui-Gon in the doorway. He was holding a colorfully wrapped package which she gratefully took from him placing it on the table next to the other.

“Do you think it’s too much?” The last thing she wanted to do was overwhelm him, but she’d learned over the years it was hard to figure out what would.

“I’m sure we could all do with a little cheeriness,” He said in lieu of answering. Maybe he didn’t know any better than she did.

It didn’t take much more time before the students she’d invited began to arrive. The entirety of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team poured in along with Stass. They’d been a little downtrodden at being beat so terribly by Slytherin, but seemed happy enough to be there. The clones were the next to arrive with Anakin in tow. Anakin proudly added his gift to the stack before going back over to Rex.

Cody arrived again, loudly kicking in the door gingerly holding the cake. It hadn’t gotten squashed which she was thankful for. Behind him was Breha and Bail, both levitating trays of food and a bowl of punch, letting them settle into place on a row of desks.

More prefects appeared as well as a few other students. Hondo had seemed rather pleased to have been invited, but Satine was a little worried about what he had possibly brought as a present. Soon the room was pretty full and Satine shushed everyone as well as she could without shouting.

“Alright I’m going to get Ben,” She announced, “Be ready.”

“Yes ma’am!” The Fett’s all saluted her and the others in the room nodded keeping their chatter to a minimum.

***

Obi-Wan was growing a little concerned. Satine had been the one to ask him to meet her in the library, but she had yet to appear. He’d kept himself occupied with his textbooks, but he was tempted to go out and look for her. It was no sooner than he closed his textbook and stood that she rounded the corner looking rather flustered.

“Sorry I’m late,” She panted as she flipped her hair back and out of her face. It was down today, which was becoming a bit of a rarity and he smiled.

“It’s no trouble,” He said sitting back down, “Was there something in particular you wanted to work on? I’ve already finished my essays, but I can help you with yours.”

“Actually,” She was fidgeting nervously and he gazed up at her in concern, “I was hoping you wouldn’t mind if we went on a walk first.”

“A walk?” That was an unusual request.

“Yes I- I just think it would be nice, don’t you?” Well, he was hard pressed to deny her anything. Especially something as simple as a walk around the castle.

“Alright,” He agreed, sliding his text book back into his bag. She was scrutinizing him and he looked down to make sure his clothes were straightened, because the last time he’d gotten that look his fly had been undone. Rather embarrassing.

He looked up again, starting in surprise, when he felt a hand in his hair. She gave him an apologetic look as she stepped back.

“Sorry, your hair was messed up,” She told him and he felt his face warm slightly, but she just coughed awkwardly and started walking. He ran to catch up.

He couldn’t help, but to run his own hands through his hair, just to ensure that it wasn’t still a mess, “It’s fine Ben,” She told him as she walked just far enough ahead to force him to follow her path.

“I didn’t think you minded much if it was messy,” He said instead of removing his hands.

“I don’t, I just-” Satine cut herself off with a shake of her head. Obi-Wan was confused, but let his hands finally drop to his sides.

“Well alright?” He wasn’t sure what else to say. She was acting off and he couldn’t pinpoint it. Maybe she was upset? But she didn’t look it. Even if she was, the library was perfectly quiet that evening. His heart beat a little faster in his chest as he remembered another time the two of them had been alone, the Christmas party. Did she- were they going to talk about it? He wasn’t sure he knew what to say about such things.

“Ben?” He looked up at his name and she was frowning at him, “Are you alright? You look pale.”

“I’m completely fine,” He confirmed, “Are you?”

“Yes?” Maybe they were both acting a little off this evening.

“Good,” He smiled at her and she returned it easily.

She turned then and walked towards the door of an empty classroom, disappearing inside. What on earth could she want with him in an empty classroom?

He refused to lose her though and quickened his pace until he was pulling the door open only to be assaulted by many loud cheers. It took him a moment to register what they were saying in the first place.

“Happy Birthday!”

His birthday? He blinked, taking in the scene. Many of his close friends were there, his Quidditch team, Anakin, Qui-Gon. All of them were standing there watching him which made him more than a little nervous. The ceiling was decorated in nearly every color of the rainbow and it was complete with balloons. He gripped the strap of his bag, unsure what was expected of him. He certainly had never had a party for himself before.

“Happy Birthday, mate!” Cody appeared in front of him practically dragging him into the room and pushing him towards the professor’s desk. It broke the tension in the room and chatter resumed much to his relief. There were less eyes on him.

“Uhm, thank you,” He managed a smile.

“Look at your cake! We had it made special.”

He looked down in surprise at a white cake decorated with 17 silver candles. Written in delicate blue icing was, “Happy Birthday Obi-Wan!” He’d never had his own birthday cake before, but he’d seen them when Satine or Cody had celebrated theirs. It was kind of them to think of him, he just wished he knew the proper way to respond. The parties he attended usually had scripts to follow and he had never been instructed for one like this.

“It’s chocolate,” Satine’s hand landed right next to his on the desk and he looked up catching her eyes, “I know it’s your favorite.”

“It is,” he agreed almost solemnly.

“Do you like it?” She asked and he nodded quickly, his face heating up, how rude that he hadn’t immediately offered them a thank you.

“Yes of course! I- Thank you,” He told them both seriously, “I’m sorry, I’m just not at all sure how I’m supposed to react.” Satine’s eyes flashed sadly at him for a moment before it was gone and she smiled at him softly, bumping her fingers into his.

“You can react however you’d like,” She assured him, “Yell at me that you hate it for all I care,” He took a step back and nearly tripped over Cody at the insinuation.

“Absolutely not, I’ll treasure it!” He vowed with a stern expression and she laughed a little, it was a sound he quite liked.

“Don’t treasure it too long,” Cody warned him, “Because after we sing to you we’re all going to eat it.”

“Sing?”

Neither of them answered, but he found himself pushed into the professor’s chair and everyone seemed to gather all around him. He felt his face get warm and he hoped it wasn’t too noticeable. Both Cody and Satine were lighting the candles on the cake and right when they were done a rather off-key rendition of “Happy Birthday” was sung and shouted at him. There wasn’t much for him to do except sit there and try to look less uncomfortable. When Fives and Echo finally finished drawing out the last “you” Satine told him to make a wish and gestured for him to blow out the candles. It took him two attempts and he wondered if he looked as foolish as he felt.

Soon, however, everyone was preoccupied with their slices of cake and mingling with one another. Obi-Wan had to admit despite his embarrassment of having so many eyes on him, the cake was rather good. It was certainly his favorite kind from the Great Hall and he was quietly delighted when Satine offered him another piece.

“You know today’s not my birthday,” He told Satine as she sat down next to him cutting into her own slice.

“I know,” She smirked, “I know that your birthday isn’t today or tomorrow, but is actually February 29th. Despite what anyone else may say about this though, is that it’s still worth celebrating even if the day won’t appear again for a few more years.”

He blinked at her, shocked. He knew she’d been interested in figuring out his birthday, but he had assumed she’d dropped it by now, “How did you find out?”

“Years of observation,” It wasn’t a helpful answer, but he had to admire her intelligence in getting this far, “So am I right?” She leaned in close to him, her eyes searching his for the answer.

“Yes,” He answered quietly.

“Kenobi!” Hondo nearly knocked him into his cake when he slapped him on the back, “Why have you not shared your birthday with me before! Hondo gives fabulous presents that one would not wish for in their wildest dreams!”

“Ah thank you Hondo,” He peeled Hondo’s arm off his shoulders. He was fairly sure Hondo was correct in his assumption that he definitely wouldn’t have wished for whatever lurked in Hondo’s present in any of his dreams.

“You’re welcome, my friend! Only the best for one of my closest associates,” He winked at him before waltzing away back into the crowd. Obi-Wan watched him go as Satine stifled her laughter.

“I assumed you’d want to open your presents later?” She asked.

“I have presents?” He looked around the room until he spotted them and blanched. There had to be at least 10 sitting there in a pile just for him, “I can’t accept that,” He looked at her with wide eyes and she narrowed her eyes.

“It would be ruder for you to reject them,” He looked between her and the presents. A catch 22.

“I’m not opening Hondo’s in front of anyone,” He decided and she laughed again.

Suddenly there was a loud crash and they both looked up to see Anakin sprawled out on the floor. Obi-Wan’s heart flew into his throat thinking of a similar event at the last party he’d gone to at this school. Before he could run over there though, Anakin was sitting up with a dopey smile on his face. He giggled.

Obi-Wan let out a sigh of relief, but something still didn’t seem right. Anakin had Qui-Gon’s help to stand up, but he wobbled. He looked a little bit like he was drunk, but he doubted Satine or Cody would spike the punch at his birthday party. Cody seemed to have a similar guess because he took a sip of his own punch and frowned.

“Don’t you think,” Anakin giggled so hard he almost fell down again, “Don’t you think that Miraj Scintel is the most beautiful girl you’ve ever met?”

The room went silent.

“She’s really beautiful,” He said again giggling wildly. He tripped and Qui-Gon just barely managed to catch him.

Half the room broke out into laughter, it was a ridiculous sight, but Obi-Wan was more worried about what the cause of this was. Qui-Gon was too and immediately slapped a cookie out of Hondo’s hand.

“Someone’s snuck a love potion in,” Satine said standing up, looking particularly mad.

“Miraj Scintel by the sound of it,” Cin Drallig raised an eyebrow as they all quietly set their food down.

“Must have been after you Kenobi,” Fives pointed out, “After all this is technically your party.”

“Me?” He barely talked to the girl and found her quite detestable, they were as different as they came.

“It’s possible any of you were the target,” Qui-Gon frowned as he picked up Anakin to keep him from getting anywhere.

“Hey put me down! I need to go tell Miraj Scintel that I love her!” Anakin cried, “Rex, do you think she’ll like me back.”

Rex was looking at Anakin as if he were contagious, but he just gave him an awkward nod and a, “Sure mate.”

“I’ll take him to Madam Nema,” He told everyone and gave a steady gaze at Obi-Wan, “He’ll be fine. In the meantime I’m sorry, but it looks like we’ll have to cut this party short.”

Before long the room had thinned out leaving just Obi-Wan, Satine, Cody, and a mess to clean up.

“You don’t have to help, Ben,” Satine said with a sigh as she pulled out her wand, “It’s your birthday after all.”

“And leave you to do all the work? I don’t think so,” He stood beside her as they both pulled the streamers off the ceiling with their wands. Cody made short work of sending all their food back down to the kitchens. The three of them moved the desks back to where they were meant to before collapsing together at a section of desks in the center of the room.

“Who knew a party would be so much work?” Cody complained as he picked a bit of streamer out of his hair.

“I did,” Obi-Wan answered quietly, “I really appreciate the thought, but I’m not sure I like having all the attention on me.”

“The point of a birthday party is just to be around those that love you,” She told him, “Yeah it’s a little embarrassing being sung too or opening presents, but there are some things in life you just have to accept.”

“I’m not sure,” He would really rather not make such a big fuss about something as mundane as the day he was born. Satine gave him a rather scathing look for a moment before sighing deeply and reaching into her bag.

“Do you remember when I was late coming back to school?” She asked them.

“Only every day,” He complained and Cody just nodded. She sized them both up before pulling out her wallet and, as if it was physically painful for her she pulled out a thin white card.

“I was late because I was getting my driver’s license,” She set the card down in front of them, revealing Satine in rather bad lighting. On the right was a list of identifying information and quite interested, Obi-Wan picked it up to look at it.

Cody immediately had broken into a fit of laughter, catching the end of Satine’s fiery glare, “It looks like a mug shot!”

“That’s why I wasn’t too interested in telling anyone!” She snatched the card out of his hands and Obi-Wan just blinked looking over at her.

“What’s wrong with it? You look lovely,” That comment just made Cody laugh harder and earned him Satine’s glare as well.

“It’s a bloody terrible photo!” She shouted shoving the thing far back in her wallet and stashing it back where it belonged, “The point is,” She emphasized, “Sometimes you have to suffer through some embarrassment in life, I doubt having a birthday party is as terrible as having that as an identifying picture.”

“I don’t see what’s so bad about it,” He looked between Cody and Satine. It showcased her hair and although she wasn’t smiling, in it he could see the softness in her eyes.

“You are unbelievable, Obi-Wan Kenobi!” Satine’s face had gone red, “I show you the worst picture of me forced to exist and you still think being sung too is worse?”

“Let’s open presents!” Cody changed the subject quickly, shoving a shoddily wrapped gift into his hands and trying to whisper, “Come on mate, open it! She already has a mugshot, what’s going to stop her from murdering us.”

“Cody!”

[beneathstarryskies]

quiet moments (Obi Wan Kenobi x Reader)

Summary: Three times Obi Wan almost says I love you, and the one time he finally does. 

Word Count: 2,558

Warnings: Mostly just fluffiness and a tinge of angst.

A/N: I hope this makes up for my complete lack of writing lately. On the plus side, I’m out of work so I have a lot of time to write now. So send those requests! 

The first time he almost tells you he loves you is right after the death of his master, Qui-Gon. The loss left a festering wound on his heart. Although Master Yoda advised him to rejoice for his master was now one with the force, he still struggled with his feelings as all humans (Jedi or not) do. No amount of training would ever help him to understand the complexity of grief or the load of extra emotions it often carries with it. When he closes his eyes, the moment of his master’s death replays behind his eyelids and he longs for peace. The longing for peace always seems to  make his mind wander to you. 

After getting Anakin settled for the night (and promising to come back to check on him later) he finds himself walking to your quarters. He’s not surprised when you open the door before he even knocks. It’s silent as he crosses the room to the window. 

It’s difficult for you to see Obi Wan like this. The pain of the last few days covers his features like a black veil, and you know he would hate it if you mentioned how apparent his feelings are. He’s always stayed so guarded, but the events of the last few days have left him feeling raw. He feels like a lost little boy: small, vulnerable, and lost. He was exhausted from putting on a strong facade for the council, and especially for Anakin. You were the only person he would allow to see him like this, and he needed to feel safe for a moment. 

“I heard they made Anakin your padawan,” your voice is soft as you carefully approach the subject. You knew he came here to talk about it, but even in times like this Obi Wan’s pride requires him to be guided towards revealing his thoughts. 

“I promised Qui-Gon I would train the boy,” he crosses his arms over his chest. You can see his face change momentarily, an attempt to harden his face to hide his feelings.

You nudge him slightly, “Don’t hide from me, Obi Wan.” 

He lets out a sigh, hating to be called out but unable to deny it. 

“I’m worried I’m not ready,” he admits. 

 “Of course you’re ready and he’s lucky to have you. You’ve always been the most clever and skilled of all the padawans our age.” 

Now it’s your turn to hide, as your admiration for him begins to spill.  He simply lets out a small, slightly sarcastic chuckle. You fall into silence, watching the rain drops slide down the window. If there ever was a way for you to steal some of his pain away, to help him bear the burden of loss, you happily would do so. You assume being his friend is enough for now. 

“I know how much Qui-Gon meant to you,” you whisper. 

“I’m afraid he didn’t,” Obi Wan confesses. 

For the first time since his master’s death he allows himself to cry. You pull him into a tight embrace, and he’s convinced he might have fallen to pieces if you hadn’t. He is surprised to find himself gripping your waist to pull you closer. His face is buried in your soft hair, letting your warmth wash over him. He breathes you in, unable to pinpoint why it is he can’t seem to get close enough. He lifts his head from your shoulder, and cups your cheeks. His calloused thumb soothes across your cheek to wipe away a stray tear. Your eyes are filled with wonder at the sudden intimacy he’s showing you. He stares longingly at your parted lips, trying not to imagine the comfort he would get from tasting them. The words dance at the tip of his tongue. An ache he’s spent so long pushing away settles in the pit of his stomach. 

You reach up to touch his chest, “Obi Wan, what is it? You can talk to me.” 

His mind is a flurry of fears and wishes and fantasy. He knows if Qui-Gon were still alive, he would’ve been encouraged to explore his feelings. However, now he is under the scrutiny of the Jedi Council. One moment of weakness could cost him everything he worked for. He drops his hands to his side, and looked down at the small space between the two of you knowing he should broaden it. Instead he drops his hands to his sides. 

“Obi Wan, please. You can tell-” 

“I should go back to check on Anakin, it’s his first night here.” 

Your heart drops as he moves past you towards the door. 

“You know,” you begin causing him to pause in front of the door. “I was always a little envious that you got Qui-Gon as a master.” 

He tilts his head slightly in your direction, “Why is that?” 

“He never would expect you to hide your feelings.” 

“Thank you for seeing me,” he whispers before leaving you alone. 

-

The second time he almost confesses his love for you is the first time you successfully knocked him down during a sparring session. The two of you were constantly sparring when you were padawans, but you never were able to best him. Now you’re both Jedi Knights, and your skills are almost on par with one another. 

This time, you’d finally done it. Granted you fell with him when he reached to grab your arm, which wasn’t actually part of the plan. The two of you land on the rough sparring mat in a tangle of limbs and grunts. The neat braid you had your hair tied in brushes against Obi Wan’s face as the two of you wrestle until you’ve managed to pin him down. You hover above him, a devious smile playing on your lips as Obi Wan seems to give up. 

The way your fingers grip his robes and your eyes scan his face reawakens a desperate need he was once sure had been put to rest. In your moment of naivety, you blame his blushing on the embarrassment of being bested. 

“I win,” you declare. 

Obi Wan was suddenly aware of how warm you felt pressed against him. His hands rest on your calves, he toys with the idea of letting his hands make their way to your thighs just to see how you would react. 

“Yes, one time out of one hundred,” he teases you while trying to avoid looking at the plump curve of your lips.

“Don’t be a sore loser,” you tease him. 

“Let’s go again, and I’ll be easy on you this time,” you suggest with a smirk. 

“Ah, you’re unearned confidence is precious,” he teases. 

“You’re so smug,” you growl.  

You notice his green eyes filled with something you’d never seen in them before. You lean in, and decide to test the waters. You place a soft kiss on his cheek. His chest tightens as he waits in anticipation for your next move. Another kiss lands on the corner of his lips, his beard tickling your face. His hands move to grip your waist, subtly urging you not to stop. You plant a single soft kiss on his lips. He cups the back of your head, deepening the kiss. You only pull away to take a deep breath. Your lips are swollen from his kiss and a tinge of pink colors your cheeks. For the second time in his life, three little words threaten to slip from his lips. As he stares in awe at you, guilt seeps into your chest. You stand up abruptly, shaking your head. 

“I’m sorry, this shouldn’t have happened.” 

Without giving him a chance to say anything else, you leave him sitting on the floor of the training dojo. 

Anakin finally arrives with a getaway ship. It takes all of your strength  and no small amount of force manipulation to pull Obi Wan through the door without either of you getting hit by blaster fire.  You press the button to pull the door shut, and then yell at Anakin to fly away from the battle raging below.

-

 It was Anakin’s idea to go on an impromptu rescue mission when Obi Wan was taken by General Grievous. Three days of torture proved useless as Obi Wan still refused to give up any information. Anakin couldn’t stand the constant transmissions of Obi Wan being tortured any longer, and the two of you went against the council despite knowing Obi Wan wouldn’t want that. 

You learned through an informant that Obi Wan was injected with some type of truth serum right before you slipped in to save him. Grievous had taunted Obi Wan with the fact that the serum had been formulated with the help of Count Dooku, and therefore was sure to work on even the strongest of Jedi. You knew deep down it was only a taunt, yet upon seeing you Obi Wan seemed very...open. 

It takes a great deal of effort and no small amount of force manipulation to get Obi Wan onto the ship with the drones shooting at you. 

“Will Master Obi Wan be alright?” Anakin asks from the cockpit of the ship as you help Obi Wan lie down on the only bunk in the ship. 

“He’ll be fine, Ani,” you answer despite the nervousness building in your own chest. The last thing Anakin needed to hear was anything upsetting. You liked the apprentice well enough, but his volatile nature made you nervous, especially in times of distress. 

“Th-thank you,” Obi Wan stutters. “I would have died without you.” 

“Surely you would’ve found a way to escape.” 

He watches you with admiration filling those beautiful eyes of his. There was something oddly intimate about the whole situation. Anakin was busy flying the ship, so lost in his unnecessary panic he might as well have been in a different world from you and Obi Wan. Obi Wan laid his hand on your knee. He was weak and almost delirious from whatever Grievous pumped him full of. Yet his face changed when you brushed a strand of auburn hair out of his face. There was a sweetness in him you weren’t used to seeing. 

“You’re magnificent,” he whispers, “So-so beautiful.” 

“You’re delirious” you tease him. 

“You’re still beautiful,” he reaches over to touch your cheek softly. 

“Shut up, Obi Wan,” you take his hand away from your face.

“I’ve wanted to tell you for as long as I’ve known you, and now you silence me,” he says with a smirk. 

  “Perhaps when you’re less delirious we can talk about it. In the meantime get some rest.”

 “You really are magnificent,” he tells you again. 

You stand up, and nudge him to lie down completely. Whispering absently about him needing to rest in order to avoid the praise he was so determined to bestow. His green eyes stayed glued to your face, not missing a single thing. He sees how your eyes can’t help but take him in, and how your face softens when he brushes his hand against yours. You reach out to cover him up with a blanket. You touch his cheek and he leans into your touch. You wonder if he will later come to regret his current lack of judgement. Your fingertips trace their way down the side of his face, moving to caress his beard. Then Anakin announces a destination and you’re pulled into reality. You fold your hands in your lap. He misses your touch as soon as it recedes

“Being a hostage makes you affectionate” you tease him. 

“I’ve always felt affection towards you. This just makes me less inclined to hide it.” He lets out a heavy sigh. “I have to tell you…”

Only you placing a soft finger over his lips stops him from saying those sweet words he wanted to say. 

“Get some rest.” 

***

You took his breath away. The soft, blue gown you wore made your eyes stand out. The way your hair was pulled up showed off your shoulders and the delicate curve of your neck. The setting Naboo sun seems to highlight your cheekbones, and your bare shoulders. Obi Wan’s heart pounds as you walk towards him. When you said you were going undercover to help protect Padme, he never would have imagined you looking so ethereal doing it. 

“I feel like I’m naked,” you whisper as soon as he’s in earshot. He laughs. 

“You look...different.” 

“Padme thought I should blend in if I was to protect her.” 

“I wouldn’t call this blending in,” he comments. His fingers absently reach out for the soft chiffon fabric. 

“If it helps me stay close enough to thwart assasination attempts I’d wear this dress forever.”

“You sound like Anakin,” Obi Wan shakes his head. “He’s fighting a bout of jealousy because you’re here with her instead of him.” 

“She’s a good person, hence why someone wants her dead.” 

“She’s a politician.” 

“And you’re a Jedi, we all have our labels. They don’t define us.” 

He lets out a sigh. More and more he finds it harder to keep a grip on the reality of the situation. When the two of you speak like this, he can’t decide if he adores you or if you’re a risk to be around. Perhaps both somehow intertwined. The very things he adores about you are the same things that keep you from being part of the council. He can feel you’re frustrated with him, and he wonders if it should stay this way. 

“Why are you here, Obi Wan?” you ask him finally. 

He’s quiet for a long time. It wouldn’t be hard to confess now with seeing you this way and being on this lush beautiful planet together. Nobody would hear except you, and if all else fails he could simply leave if you don’t feel the same way. 

“I just wanted to check on you,” he lies. “I wanted to make sure you’re faring well here.” 

“I’m doing fine.” You look down at the ground, “I do miss you though.” 

His breath catches, and then he swallows softly. 

“Ani too!” you add to try to ease the awkwardness created by your confession. 

“Of course,” he sighs. 

You step closer to him, so close he can smell the sweet perfume you were wearing. He breathes in deeply. 

“But mostly you,” you whisper. 

He closes the remaining gap between the two of you, taking your mouth with his. Everything he struggled to put into words is slowly revealed in his kiss and his touch. He wraps his arms around you, and allows his fingertips to trace against your bare back. You sigh against his lips, and send his brain into a spiral of intrusively sinful thoughts. You pull away, and both of you giggle. 

“The council definitely wouldn’t approve,” you tease him.

“They don’t have to know,” he says. “Just like they don’t need to know that I love you.” 

“You love me?” 

He smiles, “I always have.” 

“I love you too,” you whisper. 

He pulls you back into a tight embrace, and peppers kisses along your cheeks. The two of you stay tangled as though trying to makeup for all the lost time. He may not know what will happen once he leaves Naboo, but he knows he wants to spend every second until then with you. 

[gospelofme]

Leave didn’t happen very often. It was even a rarer opportunity when that included Ahsoka being able to do something fun. Most of the time, leave was for the men. She’d stand with Anakin and Obiwan in the drop ship and listen to the plans the troopers around her were making. Leave for her, however, mostly meant study time at the Temple. But, Anakin had agreed that this time could be for fun. She had worked very hard the last two months and never complained once (that he heard).

She was trying to think about what she could do on Coruscant, being a novice when it came to the planet’s nightlife. She heard Jesse and Fives mention something called Limmie, talking about attending a small match later that evening. She didn’t want to just invite herself, as she knew how important it was for the men to have time to themselves. But she didn’t want to wander around clueless for her free time either.

“What’s Limmie?” She asked, Jesse looking down at her like he’d just noticed she was there, he wore a startled expression.

“It’s bolo-ball, there’s a match tonight between two local teams. Nothing big but it’s fun.” Fives explained, giving a shrug. Ahsoka gave a nod,

“That sounds fun.” She replied. As things between the three grew quiet, Fives looked and Jesse who shrugged. They weren’t sure what Jedi did for fun really. Studying and training didn’t sound like a good time on leave to them.

“Do you...want to join us?” Fives asked, raising an eyebrow and looking at the young Padawan. He must’ve said something right because her face lit up.

“Yes! That would be great!”

Fives and Jesse explained the rules of Limmie to Ahsoka, who was taking mental notes. She had met them out in front of the Temple and they shared a cab to the location. She’d never seen them in casual clothing before, or rather as casual as clone troopers got. The two wore matching PT outfits, black shorts and a grey top with the Republic’s symbol printed in the center in a slightly darker grey. It was almost invisible really. She just wore her regular Jedi getup, feeling a bit out of place in anything else. The cab soon stopped at a sports field, a small one but it was well-kept. Ahsoka truthfully had no idea there was a sports complex in Coruscant.

Tonight it had been rented out by two local Limmie teams. The Raging Rontos and the Red Banthas. There were a fair amount of fans for each team.

“This is nothing really, not in terms of field size or fans. Coruscant has always been skimpy on the Limmie love, even though the Galactic Cup is held here.” Jesse explained, buying their entry tickets. He handed Ahsoka a lanyard with a tag on it that showed she’d paid. She thanked Jesse who waved nonchalantly. Fives picked out a good spot in the stands, Ahsoka spotted some other clones from different battalions in the crowd. They were on their way to their seats when a Rodian called Jesse over.

“Hey man, you just get in?” The Rodian asked, shaking hands with Jesse and then with Fives. Ashoka stood back a bit, it was clear these three knew each other.

“Yeah, about an hour ago really.” Fives said with a shrug. The Rodian looked at their badges.

“Did you just buy those? I’d ask for a refund bros.” Jesse and Fives glanced at each other.

“Why?” They asked in unison.

“Well, two of our guys have been injured and one got called into work. So we’re down three players. We were going to forfeit to the Banthas. Unless....” The Rodian looked the two troopers up and down.

“Do you two want to play? You’ve played in the causal games.” The Rodian offered. Jesse and Fives readily agreed.

“Now we’re only down one.” The Rodian stated, trying to think of someone else. Jesse looked over at Ahsoka, who had been standing awkwardly to the side. He nudged Fives who also looked over at Ahsoka.

“I don’t know, she’s just learned the rules...” Fives said uncertainly. Ahsoka picked up on what they were talking about.

“I can do it! Trust me.” Ahsoka said, not wanting to be left out. The Rodian considered her. She was small, but that wasn’t really a bad thing.

“Are you fast?”

“Yup”

“Okay.”

Soon the three were wearing Raging Ronto shirts, Ahsoka’s nearly swallowed her. She laced up the cleats they had found for her and stretched like Jesse and Fives had. The other team looked disheartened since they were expecting a forfeit. Ahsoka decided not to use the Force, as she was sure that was against the rules. The team huddled, Ahsoka elated to be included as if she’d always belonged. The play was laid out, a couple other team mates giving Ahsoka a run down of her role. A whistle was blown and it was time to start.

Jesse and Fives had certainly played before. She heard their names called out in the stands. She looked over and saw Echo, Kix, Boil, and Waxer in the stands. When they noticed her, they looked at each other uncertainly but cheered for her too. Their team was given the ball first and they took off with it down the field, passing the ball off to a free member when the opposite team players came upon them. It was a fast paced game and you had to know who was around you. Early on the other team members zoomed in on her as being a newbie, knocking her over and stealing the ball from her a couple times. Once Jesse came over and helped her up as Fives stole the ball back. Ahsoka shook off the frustration.

She soon got the hang of the game, she was a fast learner. Stealing the ball and knocking other players over. She soon had some people chanting her name in the stands. The adrenaline high had kicked in and she found it something she craved. Right up until one of the Red Bantha’s elbowed her in the face, Ahsoka fell backwards, stunned. Her team was suddenly at her side as the ref called foul on the offending player. Laying on the grass, Ahsoka stared up a the skylanes. Her nose throbbed and felt a bit numb. The team medic, a Zabrak, was at her side and helped her sit up. Fives and Jesse grimaced as blood started run from her nose.

“We should get her back to the base.” Fives said, Jesse nodding.

“No! Then the Rontos will be three down again.” Ahsoka said, attempting to stand.

“See, I’m fine. I can play.” She wobbled into the Zabrak medic.

“I’d advise against that.” The medic said, already leading Ahsoka to the benches. The game paused to allow the Rontos to figure out a game plan.

Echo, Kix, Boil, and Waxer were already at the barrier that separated fans from players. Kix asking the medic what happened.

“Bloody nose and slight disorientation.” The medic replied, handing Ahsoka an ice pack from the cooler and sitting her on the bench.

“Why did you two let her play?!” Echo asked Jesse and Fives, who shrugged.

“Captain Rex is going to be upset and I don’t even want to know how General Skywalker will react.” Boil said, shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

“No! We can’t tell him! He can’t know i got a nose bleed like this!” Ahsoka said, raising her head from where the Zabrak had positioned it.

“Keep your head low so the blood flows out and not back.” He instructed again, pushing her head gently back towards her knees.

“Keep playing Fives and Jesse! You can play with one out right?” Ahsoka asked the Rodian, who was the Ronto’s coach. The alien nodded,

“It will be tough but not impossible.”

“We’ll avenge you Tano.” Fives assured.

The Rontos went on to win the match, by just one goal. Ahsoka walked out with Jesse, Fives, Kix, and the gang with a Raging Ronto’s shirt that fit her.

“That was so much fun!! Fives, the way you stole the ball and kicked it to Jesse like that! Golden!!” She expressed. Her nose had stopped bleeding but was bruised. They walked towards the entrance to the base, Ahsoka feeling like one of the guys.

“Where have you guys been?” Came a familiar voice. Anakin. She turned and saw him walking toward them with Rex in tow. He saw her bruised nose and his eyes narrowed. He took in the dirt on her arms, legs, and face.

“Have you been in a fight!?” Anakin demanded, noticing her shirt.

“The Ranging Rontos?” Anakin asked.

“Local Limmie team sir.” Rex clarified. “Did they win?” He asked Jesse.

“Uh, yeah...it was close.” The trooper replied, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Ahsoka, what happened to your nose?” Anakin asked again. Fives noticing Kix, Echo, Boil, and Waxer had ditched them.

“Well, Master, the player on the Red Banthas elbowed me in the face because he was mad I stole the ball back from him. But don’t worry, Jesse and Fives avenged me.” Ahsoka said causally. Anakin staring at her, mouth agape.

“You...you played?! Do you know how hurt you could’ve been?!” Anakin exclaimed.

“Fives, Jesse, why did you let her play?!” Rex added. Ahsoka held her hands up.

“I wanted to play, it’s not their fault. And I didn’t get hurt much. Besides, I do way more dangerous things in the field!” Ahsoka said defensively.

“I agree.” Obiwan said, appearing from out of no where, one hand on his beard. Startled, Anakin grabbed his chest.

“By the Force, I thought you left!” He muttered at his Master.

“Need I remind you of your podracing days Anakin?” Obiwan mused.

“Podracing?” Ahsoka asked, that sounded fun.

“No! No you do not!” Anakin said quickly, ushering his Padawan aside.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt where I can’t help you.” He explained to Ahsoka, his tone more gentle.

“I know Master, but you can’t protect me forever.” Ahsoka debated. Anakin smirked.

“I can try. Did you have fun?” He asked. Ahsoka immediately launched into an excited re-telling of the match. Play by play.

@wille-zarr I hope you like it!!