#AND THEN SHE WAS SAD AND THEN I WAS SAD AND AAAAAAA

[thatonecrookedsmile]

So, I've recently been reading Fade To Black for the first time, and I'm making more and more progress. And at the moment I'm currently am, I have already read chapter 21 of this book.

I just wanted to put on record here that I became a different person after reading this chapter. I have been changed. I was saddened. And most importantly, I was destroyed. (ok, that's a pretty heavy word. I didn't cry, but feelings were definitely felt). This book goes hard, I believe.

Oh and also, since I got past chapter 23:

Joey Drew. I'm Gonna Kick Your Ass. Sleep with your eyes open tonight.

That's all. Have a good day everyone.

[dreams-and-honor]

OH I DO HAVE AN ISANE YAY

[grossdyke]

threw myself down on my sofa w my jacket & bag & shoes on because im too tired to do anything at all

[nexo-nex]

i am a firm believer that ginger would be so popular in the fandom if 1. she had just a tad more screentime and 2. if her main outfit wasnt so hideous

[radiodecayy]

can't believe it took me 25 years to become a Yamato fangirl but here we fucking go I guess

[nelyoslegalteam]

hello i'm here again! i saw your tags on the get to know your characters post and i'd love to hear you talk about murdoc!! (also gondolin campaign 😮 tell me more :DDD )

HIHIHIHIHI IM SO HAPPY YOU'RE IN MY INBOX THANK YOU FOR LOVING MY BOY YOU ARE A GIFT OF A PERSON ;w; i assume you don't mind if i answer these for murdoc then :0

What is the character’s go-to drink order? here's the thing: i think if murdoc is ordering, it's ale. just ale. murdoc is an alcohol snob, largely on account of being a hobbit AND specifically on account of his aunt being a brewer (and so therefore clearly HIS family's ale is the best), so it's an opportunity for him to be just a little bit showily snobbish and judgy and more knowledgeable about his choice of drink than the average patron, but it's not quite so personal to him as, say, tea would be. (murdoc never orders tea. from anywhere. he only drinks his own, or radagast's, or that of a few other trusted friends. tea is his craft. it's personal to him. he picks and dries and blends the herbs for his own brews. it's personal long before he even gets to brewing a cup, and there's meaning in just that act in and of itself already.) so, murdoc gets to be an alcohol snob in public, but it's a matter of showing off for fun. he'll scoff at ale from anywhere but his own inn, but he'll still order it and drink it. and enjoy it more than he puts on a show about.

What is their grooming routine? murdoc likes a long bath. murdoc likes to put a lot of effort into wrangling his hair in particular, when he has the time and effort in him for it. alone, at the inn, where he can rest and take breaks and manage things, shaving the back of his neck is very important to him (sensory comfort, and tied in a way to his sense of self). he doesn't like scents or anything of the sort, he just wants to feel... clean. put-together. both in the privacy and comfort of their respective homes, and while out on the road, letting ríros braid his hair for him becomes a very important part of murdoc's grooming routine. on a good day, it's a visible tie to someone he cares deeply for. on a bad day, it's accepting help with his sensory needs and energy levels, and allowing himself to be taken care of by someone he trusts.

What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? oh, murdoc's cloak was ABSOLUTELY the most expensive singular thing he's ever purchased. it may not be real dragon scale, sure but. it's a fine fabric, and the faux scales are well crafted and gorgeous. it's luxurious and sturdy and him in every way. an item with presence. which, to the point, i do think murdoc is generally the sort of person who spends his disposable income on fine things to wear. having fun with and taking pride in his appearance is important to him, and he's financially comfortable enough for that bit of luxury.

Do they have any scars or tattoos? aside from the missing hand (extremely notable), and whatever assorted and unspecified scars he's picked up from adventuring? (which. he has. he's come close to dying before. he's got a few marks.) murdoc has a scar across his nose from some absolutely stupid shit he got up to as an utter hellion of a child. i think he probably fell and bashed his face open running to escape getting caught pulling a prank on farmer maggot or something like that. nothing angsty about it, just complete and utter childhood stupidity and rambunctiousness. something visible left on him from a time before he was overly concerned with responsibility, or duty of care, and entertaining his drive for adventure in much less consequential ways. (he’s also very freckled. i think it’s very adorable how much he freckles.)

What was the last time they cried, and under what circumstances? the last time i know for certain that murdoc cried, was after facing irmo. maybe not immediately. maybe much later, on the road home, having spilled the story to his companions and having thoroughly exhausted himself from hanging onto it all. but i'm sure he did cry. from anger at what was done to him, to his dreams, by a power larger than him, without any say of his own in it all. from all his internalization of himself as a weapon finally breaking over, from hearing that perception of himself lovingly rebuffed by the people who care about him. from fully and completely admitting that he's afraid of the person he's made himself in the face of the horrors, but that he would've hated the person he would have been for ignoring them. from exhaustion. from having to question his sense of self yet again. from a lot of things, really. you don't get personally chosen by a god and come away from it quite the same.

Are they an oldest, middle, youngest or only child? oh murdoc is an eldest sibling and it shows. maybe not by actual sibling birth order, but he was adopted by his uncles and aunt as a baby and very much raised as their eldest child. he's got two rascals of younger cousins, raised alongside him, to look out for. they're practically younger siblings from an actual family dynamics standpoint. and besides, he's got all the Eldest Child of being the brandybuck family heir apparent put on him. where else would the responsibility complex and the duty of care complex and the possessiveness over what's his and, most importantly, go-to instinct of sassing the literal servants of sauron have come from? This Man Is An Eldest Child And He Can Do This All Day <3

Describe the shoes they’re wearing. none. Those Feet Are Bare. and hairy. he DOES meticulously wash and brush his foot hair though. but listen. he's a hobbit. he's not FROM a culture that does shoes, and the one (1) time in his life ever that he had to wear them, his only takeaway from the experience is that they are a sensory nightmare that he will not be subjecting himself to under ANY circumstances.

Describe the place where they sleep. ooohhhh i think both at home in the inn and also to the greatest extent on the road possible, murdoc does cozy. i think his (+ his partner's) room at the inn is covered in like. throw pillows. nice big comfy sleeping pillows. lots of soft blankets. it's all very warm and inviting and kinda maximalist in a plush sort of way. i do think he cares about aesthetics and all his pillows and blankets look nice together, but everything is selected with comfort in mind. it's homey. it's warm. he's a hobbit. it's probably not particularly neat, but it's sort of charming in the way where it looks like a space that's meant to be curled up in. he probably accidentally leaves a few stray tea mugs about and this is his worst living space habit, but it adds to the charm as long as he remembers to actually keep up on putting them away (which. he does. he's just on top of it enough to make sure he has clean mugs to actually use for tea, but this may be the only reason he remembers). i think even on the road he'll bring as many blankets as is reasonable to carry and do his utmost not only to make his sleeping space, but the whole camp's, as cozy and welcoming as possible with whatever he has.

What is their favorite holiday? ohh see i don't know if i do know enough about specific hobbitish holidays offhand for this, but in general i do think murdoc is a holidays kind of person. anything sort of extrovert-oriented, where he can feast and dance and get drunk and just be around people, is very much his sort of thing. when he was growing up in the shire, any occasion where gandalf showed up with fireworks was an immediate favorite. for least favorite... i don't know how he feels about new year's (yule, in the hobbitish calendar). i don't think he hates it but. i think he's someone who lives with a bit of a sense of loss over who he was, or might have been, before his dreams and irmo and everything, and i think nostalgia-oriented celebrations grate just slightly up against that.

What objects do they always carry around with them? tea. lots of it. kept in his pockets. (he smells like it. it’s nice.) usually a particular brew (the flavor profile of which i imagine to be something like london fog) that he made for himself, which is very personal to him. a locket with his partner's portrait in it. an ornately carved matchbox, always full of matches, ready to light an arrow or for whatever else he may use his fire for. additionally, on the road: a jar in which he cultivates a toxic fungus, used for coating his weapons in tough battles. a set of his favorite cooking knives. a flask or two of his family’s ale, primarily used in his cooking, as ornate and pretty as all else he owns. (i will also give him that he most always is wearing jewelry, particularly his ruby necklace and earring set. the necklace in particular is important - usually maedhros resides in ríros’ sword, but the necklace is an ideal secondary vessel on the occasions that maedhros does have to remain where murdoc is, and murdoc has selected these pieces in maedhros’ colors for a reason).

as this has gotten LONG i will not try to do them for my new beloved tyelperëkko antar JUST yet. BUT @jaz-the-bard is planning to run a campaign set in gondolin in the first age and i am VERY excited for the character i have made. i’ve given them the oathsworn background. they’re going to be a loyal follower of maeglin, once he exists, but for NOW they’re a devotee of turgon. this is going to go great for them and cause no problems at all (lying).

[freunwol]

the best thing to do late at night is get really sad about miu iruma

[mbirnsings-71]

MADI MADI MADI whos ur fav mighty nein characters/rank them :0!!

*Cracks knuckles* Okay so to preface this, I love all of the Mighty Nein. Absolutely love all of them, it is my comfort D&D Campaign along with other D&D campaigns like Misfits & Magic or Escape from the Bloodkeep like it is the first D&D campaign I finished and it makes me so emotional to think about them. I almost have all their origin comics (I need Caduceus' to arrive in the mail (HE'S ON HIS WAY I GOT THE EMIAL NOW) and then I'm set unless we get an Essek one.)

But like in Terms of my favorites? I am a Strong Caleb Widogast, Essek Thelyss, Jester Lavorre, and Caduceus Clay enjoyer.

My love for Caleb started because he had a cat man. I love cats, and so of course I was immediately intrigued AND THEN WE GET TO HIS ANGST AND OOOOO- it's also the way his character alignment changes throughout the campaign and how he grows and heals and that concept is what I really love from the Mighty Nein. The way they all grow and become better as the story goes on, especially after Molly like :(

That being said Essek I love because this man committed War Crimes but then is revealed to have no friends and that his favorite food is soup LIKE he's such a good character to show what effect the mighty nein has on people that come into their mists because he was supposed to be an evil NPC, his alignment was/is evil, but the mighty nein (especially Jester) took one look at him and went "you're our friend now!" Like the nein love Essek and are really showing that the power of friendship can in fact be good for you!! Plus his and Caleb's Dynamic is so fun please I love him.

Jester is because she's quite literally me. If I had to pick two people that I probably am out of the Mighty Nein due to just what people have said and my own analysis, Her and Caleb are me coded. She's an Artist! (which I do have Critical role art on here you would just have to find it on here somewhere I haven't drawn the nein in a hot minute-), she's silly, she loves her friends, she's lonely, she's literally me! PLUS THE FACT SHE DOESN'T LIKE HEALING AS A CLERIC IS THE FUNNIEST THING EVER- but when she does heal she is godly at it!! PLUS HER AND ARTY'S WHOLE DEAL, THE WHOLE BELIEVING IN HIM ENOUGH AND HELPING HIM GAIN ENOUGH SUPPORTERS TO BE ELEVATED INTO A FALSE GODHOOD STATUS LIKE IT'S SOOOOOOO- I know it's because Laura wanted to play a Warlock and Travis yoinked that so she didn't BUT OH IT WAS SO FUN TO SEE THAT UNFOLD-

and then Caduceus is because I love Clerics so much. I love playing Clerics, I love watching people play Clerics, just Clerics are high tier for me. (Then again I just love spell casters in general,,, as you can see from this list) but there is something about this Firbolg who just loves his family and was raised in a graveyard and has dead people tea on hand and is just the silliest. He may not be smart but he is wise and his and Fjord's bond while Fjord was trying to find a new patron and Caduceus was like "I think Melora will like you :3" LIKE god their friendship is so fun. PLUS HE'S CANONICALLY AROACE AND LIKE YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!! just god I love the Mighty Nein so much they are everything to me!!

[thatdamhobbit]

Isolde Vysora and her damned big heart

One of Izzy’s core traits is her compassion and empathy. She’s a healer, a helper, her first thought in any situation is ‘are people hurt, and if they are how can I help them not be?’. But what do you do when your hands unwittingly become weapons of destruction? When your mind becomes the battleground of forces out of your control, and you are left desperately wrestling for control of your own body, your own power, your own magic? When you inevitably lose the battle, and you can only deal with the damage done by voices you failed to keep silent?

In her very desperation to avoid hurting any more people, Izzy caused the death of one of her closest friends. Opinions differ on whether it was actually her fault - many of the group see Izzy as responsible, while those who are closer to Izzy and knew the situation know that it’s more complex than that. Izzy wants to think it wasn’t her fault, but in her mind there is no escaping the fact that she gave a force that was known to be dangerous and violent the power and opportunity to do harm. And now she has reaped the consequences, left alone and lost with no-one to blame but herself.

[shinyshayminflower]

To anyone following me here, I just finished reading Gideon the Ninth a few weeks ago, but university is kicking my ass hard time. So I haven’t been able to read Harrow the Ninth yet or any other books really, so I’m just casually re reading Gideon rn. So I please ask if anyone sends me things that it isn’t spoilers for the next books! I would appreciate that a lot 💖💖 however I know a lot of sapphics follow me so if anyone wants to talk about it my DMs are wide open <3

[wildflowercryptid]

i'm 2 days away from finishing year 2 in awl and now i'm getting anxiety over whether i raised my baby properly or not. 😥

[kissboybyler]

kay so know how i’ve told you guys that my parents and i are watching stranger things together? Well, we’re in s4 and we finished s4 the other day i think, and like a week ago i asked them to tell me their top 3 fav characters and top 3 DUOS (not ships, DUOS) so- here’s how it went

Dad

Fav characters

- El (he loves her so much, thinks she’s a badass)

- Hopper (i feel like he’s in love with him, i catch him almost fucking giggling whenever hop is in a scene)

- Murray (thinks he’s super funny and kinda insane)

In general my dad loves insane, comedic and powerful characters

Fav duos

- Jopper (classic, kudos for that papa)

- Jancy (did NOT expect that one, he literally never talks about them)

- Milkvan (I ASKED HIM “Why??” AND HE SAID “aren’t they like- together?” AND I WAS LIKE “But dad- they have no chemistry” AND HE WAS LIKE “well i don’t know” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NOOOO DAD PLEASE)

Mum

Fav characters

- El (they both adore her, my mum thinks she’s very emotionally intelligent, badass and straightforward)

- Dustin (snfnjsksksks my mum LOOOOOVES dustin, he makes her laugh all the time and she adores how insane and intelligent he is)

- Will (YES HESYEYEYYEYSSYEYESSSSSSSSSSSS when i asked her she was like “he’s such a sensitive and gentle boy, and i think he cares about other so much but he also has a deep sadness about him”)

Fav duos

- Jopper (hoorayyy everyone loves jopper <3 mum said, and i quote, “hopper has the power to do things but he needs joyce to actually push him into doing things. He looks tough but joyce is the actual tough one” and um- yep pretty much)

- Jancy (AGAIN she doesn’t mention them that much EITHER so i was (pleasantly) surprised to hear that. She says that, like jopper, they balance each other out, Nancy is fierce and incredibly driven and intelligent, but she needs someone to calm her and also be a bit more realistic. She says that jonathan is a really melancholic but sweet person (byers siblings let’s go) and he knows all her right spots)

and

DRUM ROLLS PLEASE

- BYLER 🥳🥳🥳🥳 (When i tell you i GASPED I DIED I SCREAMED I CRIED-

She was the first to answer and she’d already said jopper and jancy and i was like “Mum? What’s the third one?” “What?” “I asked if you could tell me your 3 fav duos” “Well- you know, i think that two people who you can’t imagine one without the other are Mike and Will, like they are always together and they have a special bond”

The next day i asked her to tell me why she liked the duos and each of her fav characters and when it was time for byler she said “mike is super protective of will and will always leans on him and they care and understand each other so much”

UMMMMM DOES THAT REMIND YOU OF SOMETHING

DUDE ID NEVER SHOWN HER THE VIDEO WITH NOAH AND SHE SAID EXACTLY THAT, i could barely conceal my giddiness.

And then she said “but i don’t like how mike has been treating will the past seasons, he’s so mean” and then we talked a bit about milkvan and i said “yeah one of the plot-points they explore in s4 is mike’s inability to tell el he loves her” and she was like “but why? she’s his girlfriend??!” and i didn’t want to say more so i was like “ummm we’ll see i guess” “why are they even together if they can’t communicate?” GIRL THATS WHAT WE’VE BEEN SAYING-

AND SHE WANTS MILKVAN TO BREAK UP SO THAT EL CAN BE INDEPENDENT AAAAAAA)

[not-someone-who-matters]

AAAAAAAA THE ITHACA SAGA

ok so. No words for the challenge. Just. God. Penelope. Penelope. Penelope!! PENELOPE

She sounded sooo good

HOLD THEM DOWN WAS WORSE THAN I IMAGINED WTF??? Like it was and ABSOLUTE BANGER AS A SONG BUT LIKE. So dark too!!! AAAAAA. Antinous I'm glad ur dead <3

ALSO the way they talk about Penelope as their queen ughhhhh so gross. I hate them.

ODYSSEUS. MURDERING THE SUITORS. YESSS KING SLAYYYY.

Also that rejection of open arms? YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES

And when the suitors try to use Telemachus to control Odysseus? CHILLS.

Also the way jay didn't shy around saying what the men were planning to do to Penelope. No euphemisms no stepping around it HE SAID IT OUTRIGHT. Leave the utter VIOLENCE of what the men were planning to do on display!!!

Also, something about how antinous uses euphemisms but Odysseus doesn't.... Odysseus who has seen and faced the horrors of violence.... Antinous who has inflicted in on others but never had it done on himself..... Idk something to think about idk.

THAT TELEMACHUS ABD ODYSSEUS REUNION FUCK MY HEART

And then Athena!!??!! And the way she asked Odysseus if a better world was possible and he was like "maybe but not for me. You're inmortal, you can build that world. I've tried and failed that too many times, I have only one priority now" and like FAIR BUT STILL SO SAD. FULLY LEAVING POLITES BEHIND. GOG.

And. Then. AAAAAAA PENELOPE MY QUEEN. MY. QUEEN. ABSOLUTE QUEEN. YES.

I can imagine Odysseus at the start of the song kneeling on the floor. Begging for forgiveness. Then he becomes angry at what Penelope says but she's like "violence or not ur still my husband (also the violence is kinda hot NGL <3)" and then like. Oh god. The you're mine. The I love you. (Lies on floor)

I'm dead.

[nativegirltapes]

ONG I’VE MISSED YOU QUEEN!! when i tell you you’re the best drew writer… anyways. what do we think drew and angel are doing right now?

AAAAAAA that’s so sweet thank you! <3333

they’re def in angel’s dorm rn as she’s supposed to be studying for her final exams coming up bc the semester is almost over. buuuuut instead she’s crying in drew’s big arms bc she just wants to graduate already as he tells her ‘everything’s gonna be okay’. she’s also extra sad cause he has to go back home tmr cause it’s monday :( she’s begging him to stay another few nights, he’s all like “i wish i could baby, but i got stuff for work.” and she’s all like “what work?? have your stunt doubles do it for you.” and drew thinks you’re so funny lol.

they’re def gonna skip the studying and go out for frozen yogurt and angel is gonna show off her big buff old ass bf <3

[milkbreadtoast]

im sorry ever since i had this thought i can't stop thinking about it THE LGBTNESS OF IT ALL...

IM SLEEP DEPRIVED SO THIS MIGHT NOT BE COHERENT BUT:

im rereading the twsb novel from the beginning and its so so good... and every single minute detail of cedric's slowburn developing crush on prince jesse(yeseo) makes me feel like im lit on fire...... also its even better on 2nd read im catching more details and that i missed/forgot and AAAAAH

ALSO I MADE THIS CONNECTION AND... HNNGFHHH... I LOVE TWSB... thank u for resetting the timeline... 🥹😭 AAAAH THE LGBTNESS OF IT ALL. IM IN FLAMES

also: 🫠🫠🫠🔥🔥🔥 (not posting excerpts but this is all from ch 15)

[possiblylu]

"my child is fine"

your child's favorite alnst character is LUKA and she's counting down the days until Weige because she's very hyperfixated and also why doesn't the fandom like Hyuna more like holyyy shittttf also I can't decide which song/cover is peak cause literally I love the whole cast and songs and Mizi holy shit your outfits are cool and Ivan I can't with the bowl cut profile image but you are GORGEOUS your name is RIGHT you ARE gods gift to till and IvanTill makes me sad and Sua ur so amazing actually and aaaaaaa I love all your voices