#AWS Step Functions
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antstackinc · 5 months ago
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ho2k-com · 11 months ago
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veal-exe · 3 months ago
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EDIT
This has gotten a lot of traction so I’m gonna be rude and say that if anyone here has the means, that my spouse and I need help to not be homeless and hungry.
my paypal is [email protected]
END EDIT
———
I was discussing the incident mentioned later in this piece with my wife yesterday and I saw another post by someone earlier doing something mentioned in here and I'm finally going to say something about it.
There is a serious problem in leftist spaces, especially online, especially on Tumblr, when it comes to language.
The way people are expected to speak just to even enter these spaces is incredibly complex, to the point of being outright hostile to those who haven’t already spent time in them. And it’s not just newcomers; people who have important things to say, people speaking from lived experiences, people who don’t have English as a first language but still deserve to be heard, are constantly talked down to or even pushed out entirely for not using the "right" words.
This gets even worse when you factor in how often new terms are coined in English, and then people are shamed for not immediately knowing or using them.
I saw someone reblog their own post saying something like, "I know for a fact more than half of y’all didn’t understand a fucking word I said here."
And honestly? That stuck with me, because yeah, I’ve felt that before. Not because I don’t value critical thinking! because I absolutely do! I just made a post on that too! but because so many of these posts are written in a way that makes them Functionally Inaccessible to anyone who doesn’t already have the right background knowledge. And at a certain point, if you actually want your words to have an impact, if you actually want to create meaningful change, then you’re going to have to accept some things:
People will not always use perfect language.
2. People will not always know the exact terminology you personally prefer they use when engaging in discourse.
3. Dismissing or attacking people for how they say something, instead of engaging with what they’re saying, is actively harmful.
And more than that, if you genuinely want people to understand and engage with the things you’re talking about, especially people who don’t speak English as a first language, especially people without access to higher education, especially people who don’t even know where to begin when it comes to self-education (because yes, that is a skill that has to be taught) then you are going to have to be the one to adjust sometimes. You are going to have to let people say things imperfectly. You are going to have to take a step back and engage with the message rather than just the words being used to express it.
One of the experiences that made me realize that I, as a non-native English speaker, was not welcome in Tumblr leftist spaces was when I spoke about real-life oppression I had experienced. I left one word out of my post, a word which honestly, was not even important when talking about an incident that had Happened To Me, not theory, not hypotheticals or any what-ifs of oppression, a story, a story about something that happened to me.
And because of that, people sat in a Discord server, picking apart my words, accusing me of awful things, and then came into my askbox throwing jargon and buzzwords I’d never even heard before, then got mad at me for being frustrated that this was happening.
Think about that. People who are directly impacted by oppression are being pushed out of spaces meant to discuss it because the way they speak doesn’t conform to certain expectations. That is not justice. That is not solidarity. That is not progress.
There is a fundamental disconnect here between theory and praxis. Ironically so many of you do not know what praxis is, because most of you engage with a lot of theory, and not a lot of praxis, you use the word praxis a lot, but, ironically, you have no idea what it means.
{to put my money where my mouth is, it means Doing Something, in the simplest possible terms}
In theory, leftist spaces should be accessible. They should be places where people can speak openly about their experiences, learn from each other, and work toward meaningful change. But in practice? There’s a gatekeeping of language so intense that many people, particularly those who are marginalized in ways beyond just their political beliefs, are outright excluded.
And this is something I need people to sit with: The assumption that the "right" language is easy to learn, or that anyone who doesn’t use it is being willfully ignorant, is an inherently privileged stance. Knowing where to find information, how to process it, and how to integrate new terminology into your vocabulary is a skill that is largely tied to education. Having the time to engage with leftist literature and theory, to stay up-to-date on every new term that gets introduced, is also a privilege. And the fact that so many people refuse to acknowledge this, that they expect perfect articulation from everyone, regardless of background, and punish those who don’t measure up, is a huge problem.
Worse still, the same people who act as gatekeepers of this language often fail to communicate their ideas in a way that is accessible at all.
This doesn’t mean that complex ideas should never be discussed. It doesn’t mean that people shouldn’t strive for accuracy in their language. But it does mean that if your goal is to educate, if your goal is to spread awareness, if your goal is to help people understand and join the movement, if your goal is to engage with fellow oppressed people, then you have a responsibility to meet people where they are. You have a responsibility to make your language understandable.
Because if people can’t even process what you’re saying, then what’s the fucking point?
And before anyone says, "Well, people should put in the effort to learn!" Let me make something very clear: They do.
People who are new to leftist spaces, or who are coming in from different linguistic and cultural backgrounds, are often trying their best to engage. They are listening, they are learning, they are processing. But if the response to every mistake, every slightly off phrasing, every unfamiliarity with a new term, is immediate hostility,
or even if it's just 'hey I see you're sharing a personal moment, but can you change your language to make me, personally, more comfortable with you discussing your oppression?' then you’re not teaching.
You’re just making sure only the people who already think and speak exactly like you get to stay in the room.
Your language, your terminology, your theory? none of it means anything if you can’t make it accessible to the people who actually need it. And it means nothing if you use it to Exclude rather than Include.
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coconutdays · 2 months ago
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sex, money, feelings dont die
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s. you come back home after spending a year away from your friends, suguru geto among them. and you think you've gotten over your suppressed feelings for him, you think
w.c. 11.2k
w. fem! reader, kickboxer/business student!geto! x reader , mutual pining! friends to lovers! fluff!, smut! virginity loss! (but it's not that big of a deal, you'll see why) masturbation!
a/n: ummmmmm I thought about this while watching a suguru edit. this is a little slowburn, but not painful I think idk I stayed up to finish this. will proofread later I need sleep. mwah hope you like.
you are beat up the first morning you wake up in your home after spending a year abroad.
your head is pounding, the light is agonizing to stare into, and your back is tense after spending the last 24 hours running around with the fattest luggage on earth, sleeping on stiff airport lounge seats, and sleeping on the stiff plane seats, or at least trying to.
buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz
fuck's sake
"let me sleep, let me sleep, let me sleep." you groan painfully into your bed, body short circuiting on the jet lag and reminiscing on the peaceful sleep you were just having.
buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz
"oh my-"
knock-knock
your head whirs up and looks towards where the door to your apartment would be outside of your room. and you hear a faint, familiar voice calling out your name cheekily.
exhausted, you get up and out of bed to open the door.
"as much as I missed you guys, I just traveled across the world and my body is still recovering..."you groan, walking to your couch and flopping onto it, eyes still a bit puffy.
"my body too would also miss the crisp baguettes and wine for breakfasts," gojo slyly comments as he slides into your apartment with one step and plops into your--small--beanbag, his legs poke out comically while he inhabits the light pink ball of foam.
a light whiff of cigarette smoke and cherries inhabit your room too when shoko throws a warm? bag on your back and picks up your legs so she can sit underneath them.
"I told him you wouldn't want people at your door this early." she sighed aloofly.
"nothing a breakfast bagel can't fix." gojo snickers
you finally open your eyes and sit straight up, digging into the brown paper bag that was once on your back
"or two." he adds, watching with a smirk as you take a hearty bite out of the first bagel
when you gulp it down and clear your throat, you point a finger at him then to your suitcase in the corner of the room, "there are four boxes of pierre herme macaroons in there with your name written all over them."
"aw you thought about me."
"yeah I really do," you speak gruffly between heavenly bites, "paris doesn't make this shit."
"there's no bagels in Paris?" shoko tilts her head, a blank look in her eyes
"shut up, you know what I mean." you almost moan, faintly rolling your eyes back in pure bliss before forming a realizing thought and turning to gojo, "did you come here this early for your macarons gojo satoru????"
his smile is blank and so are his eyes, you can tell, even through his stupid glasses.
"eat that second bagel, why don't you, my favorite friend who I've missed so dearly."
right before a slight scowl forms on your face, shoko interjects.
"he did cry when nobody else wanted to drink the nth pornstar martini with him at the function the other day."
"hey!"
you giggle a little and feel your sleepiness and grumpy mood fading away. (thank you gojo's breakfast bagels and shoko's disrespect)
"no need to worry anymore babygirl, daddy's home." you smile, lazily hugging the armrest of your couch
gojo huffs and puts a hand close to your face, "I saw your stories unfaithful slut, those cheese fiends were matching your freak, with espresso martinis of all things."
"but did I ever drink a pornstar martini without you?" you poke back, slapping his hand away
you can tell gojo is thinking and has been left speechless, but just as much as he's a victim to shoko, so are you.
"that she posteddddd."
"you guys are not allowed to wake me up this early and bully me, either of you," you state as you jump up and address the both of them before heading to your fridge to serve yourself some water.
"anyways, where's suguru?"
"training." shoko answers airily as her head lolls onto the armrest.
"he's been super focused lately right? I think he deactivated his instagram like the first month of me being in France."
you remember feeling bummed out every time you posted a pretty picture and never saw him in your views.
"that's an understatement," satoru scoffed snarkily, "I do not understand such a dedication to kickboxing when he's deadset on business."
"can't a guy have hobbies?" shoko questions, not at all seemingly bothered by Geto's dedication to sport such as satoru is.
"you guys want coffee?" you ask, about to turn your back to turn on ur espresso machine.
"yes," gojo says before adding a quick, "but from the cafe two blocks from here."
eyes squinted, you turn again and lean against your kitchen countertop, "I literally have a coffee machine."
"you drink that pretentious small espresso shot crap, weirdo, I don't want that"
"okay but I can just pour milk for yours?"
"I doubt you can make an iced vanilla biscoff latte here." he scoffs
"satoruuuuuu~" you whine, exhaling as you stare up at your ceiling, "I have to wash my face and get ready! I wasn't mentally prepared for that."
"I'll buy you a pistachio matcha latte," he grins, toothy and sharp, "with that creamy oatmilk you like that's an extra 2 dollars."
"I missed you and your bank account so, so much," you say whole heartedly, sending him quick air kiss of appreciation with your middle and index finger as you trot into your bathroom to start getting ready.
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on the walk to the cafe, you fight and try to suppress the wondering your conscious has for suguru geto.
you're friends, have been since your freshman year of college, and that's all you have been. there's always been a feeling there in regards to him, but you've never touched on it for more than you've thought about it (repeatedly.) you just couldn't bring yourself to break that peaceful friendship or to even think about crossing it.
sure you noticed the day he deactivated his socials.
sure you like wearing his hoodie/jackets and acting like nothing of it.
but it's not like you took up the scholarship offer in Paris because maybe your favorite city in the world could distract you from hoping he'd ever flirt with you.
it did
"oh is that the rock climber?" shoko asks as she peers over your shoulder and onto your phone.
"indeed it is," you mutter cheekily as you answer the French fling's text, "he thought I was leaving tomorrow instead of yesterday, lmao"
"no goodbye sex?"
"fingering me is hardly sex," you look at her with a side eye
"woah, couldn't get over the 50/50 thing after all huh?"
"never," you sighed, putting your phone back in your pocket, "the least he could do was service me a little with a few orgasms after I had to pay for my own drinks."
"so who did you fuck?" satoru interjected, visibly curious as he stood in line with you guys and simultaneously read the coffee menu for any new sugary drinks
"nobody," you sighed, "didn't feel like anyone was worthy losing my card to."
but all this and here you are, shoving thoughts of him to the back of your mind. it's all become so natural that compressing any thought of geto isn't an overthought process anymore. you've forced yourself to become near careless about him, silencing the voice that cares every minute of every day. you don't know if you're in love with him or containing a small crush on him, that's how scared you are.
"understandable," satoru reasons, whilst picking his phone out of his pocket to read something.
"hey, look at that, haibara wants us all to come for drinks at his place tonight," blue eyes sparkle at you from beneath his glasses that he's purposely let slide downwards, "you know he makes the best lychee and passionfruit martinis."
"and dirty martinis." shoko pipes in
both you and gojo stare at her in slight disgust before he returns to giving you his puppy face.
"as long as there's a ride home involved, I hate sleeping at other people's places."
satoru stands straight up in glee and claps his fingers together, "great! don't worry about that, suguru doesn't drink anymore because of how uptight he's been lately."
the whole day becomes hang out with satoru and shoko day after that. you can't exactly go home by the time you're done with your matcha latte and your stomach starts rumbling for lunch, especially when trust fund baby satoru offers to pay for lunch. then he drags you both into a museum he's been wanting to see, and suddenly it's nearing sundown and it's time for dinner.
"let's go buy pizzas for haibara!" satoru exclaims with a pep in his step as he leads the way for you and shoko to follow after him.
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when you get to haibara's apartment, everyone's already there.
various chimes of your name are said as you begin to greet everyone after being away for so long.
utahime hugs you particularly tight and fusses over you, "thank god you're back, you look so beautiful, shoko's too careless to have conversations with sometimes."
fearing your friend would be offended, your mouth open and closes, unable to figure out what to say until you turn to look at her sleazed on the couch and already lighting a cig.
"it's true," she shrugs
"I'm glad to see you too hime." you smile, embracing her in the hug again.
you hear a familiar voice speak when you let go of the embrace
"there wasn't really anything for me to wear haibara, had to settle for this shirt."
geto stands at the door to haibara's bedroom, one hand up and holding onto the frame as he calmly peers down at his shirt and then to the owner of it.
why was he wearing haibara's shirt? and why does it look so...
and suddenly he's looking at you, eyes softening just a bit as he greets you by your name and starts to walk towards you.
you'd imagined, hoped seeing him again would warrant more excitement from him, but no he's still the same calm and collected guy he's always been.
"suguru" you smile, ignoring the way your heart races at the side hug he gives you
well, his body isn't the same. god, how often has he been training? you didn't know his arms could be that veiny.
"satoru texted me that you've been with him and shoko all day." he starts, lips only slightly, minisculely turned upwards as a way of being polite towards your presence.
"since eight in the morning." you sigh, looking over at the freakishly tall giant already breaking into one of the many pizza boxes he bought.
"he missed you." suguru looks at his best friend too, making a face of disgust for a moment when satoru finishes a pizza in two bites.
"I missed him too," you breathe, smiling a little, "wallet or no wallet."
that makes suguru laugh and you're so thankful tails evolutioned off of humans or else you'd have a hard time controlling the urge to wag it back and forth at the reward that was making geto suguru laugh.
"I missed you." he says once his laugh falters away
"me too." you respond, fighting the awkward and terrible pit in your stomach
did he really miss you? miss you? how much did that mean for him?
it doesn't seem like a lot because he gives you a small grin before walking towards shoko and striking up a conversation with her. and gojo hithers you to him from across the room to start drinking your first martini of the night.
you've forgotten how drunk you get with gojo.
your vision is tunneled and you dont know what time it is or what is even what.
"oh brother." you groan, stabilizing yourself on the kitchen countertop. you had gotten up from being sprawled on gojo's back on the floor because you wanted a slice of pizza and the journey seemed quite treacherous now. so far, yet so close. you just had to open that pizza box.
until a hand made its way into your vision, opening the box, getting a slice, and offering it up to you. its a pretty hand, a silver ring on the index finger, veins running up it and onto the arms
of suguru
he's smiling fondly at you
"hungry?" he asks in amusement
"yes, thank you." you gulp, otherwise unable to show how flustered you are due to the immense alcohol in your system and insatiable hunger.
once you take the slice from him, geto begins to slide a chair out and helps you land on it considering it was a little high.
he sits across from you on the kitchen island.
"parmesan?" he has the bottle in hand, jeering it to you
"mhm" is all you can say through a muffled mouth and take the parmesan bottle for yourself.
"is this anything like the pizza over there?" he asks again in amusement
"no," you shake your head gruffly, almost groaning from how wonderful the taste is on your inebriated mouth, "but I can appreciate this right now."
you feel as if you've finished your pizza far too soon, knowing that the part of you that's embarrassed is subdued and screaming that you've been far unladylike in front of suguru, who eyed satoru so disapprovingly when he did it.
suddenly,
"you have some..." suguru leans over just a smidge and brushes your cheek with his thumb, "...parmesan dust."
"oh," you try to keep your jaw closed amid the surprise of his actions, "thank you."
"you want another slice?" he nudges his head in the direction of the box next to him, eyes innocently waiting for a response.
he sees you open and close your mouth again, hesitant on a response before he decides for you and gets you another slice.
"you need something else in your stomach to keep the martinis some company." he smiles a little and motions for you to look at the plastered satoru on the floor, "he's done already, so don't worry."
"thank you." you almost pout as an appreciation to his mercy and figure you should ask what was on your mind earlier, after chewing and swallowing a bite gracefully. you were going to be more conscious of this second slice.
"why are you wearing one of haibara's shirts by the way?"
"Oh," his eyebrows only raise a little and he looks down at the extra tight black shirt, "he was trying to imitate those street vendors that make slushies out of regular soda before you three got here."
"and haibara being him, I figure somewhere along the lines it erupted all over you." you giggled a little, imagining the mess
"that you are correct." geto smizes. he then looks around to the various bodies thrown across the room and zones in onto the floor.
"are you ready to go now satoru?" he asks, one brow quirked up, wondering if his best friend heard him or not.
you turn a little to look at him too and he only turns his face so that his cheek is resting against the floor.
"I don't think I'm even ready to get up," he grumbles, "you guys can go without me, I'm fine right here for the night."
feeling alert already at the idea of being alone with geto, you ask satoru if he's sure
"your back is going to hurt a lot in the morning Toru." you plead internally
"don'ttttttt careeee." he burbles
you're about to open your mouth to urge him again, but suguru gets up and nudges your arm lightly, keys already in hand, "don't worry about satoru, he doesn't have anything important tomorrow anyways."
then his hand is reached out towards you, probably to help stabilize you as you get off the ridiculously tall chair.
hazily, you take it and start to follow him out of the apartment and to the parking lot
his back looks really good in that shirt, you note. every muscle is carefully outlined, every movement of his being emphasized.
"hey," he turns his head over his shoulder to peer down at you, "why're you back there."
suguru then reaches a hand behind your back lightly and motions you to walk in front of him.
"oh, my bad," you murmur, having been snapped back into reality.
the rest of the walk to his car is quiet. and when you get there, suguru's leading you to the passenger seat, opening the door for you, and leaning in to buckle you in without even asking if you could do it.
when he starts the car, you see the time on his front screen.
3:43
"oh my god," you gape at the time, then look at geto while he starts to back out.
one hand on the back of your seat.
"hm?"
and that's all it takes for you to resume what you were going to originally say, finding all the scattered gibberish in your brain to form and communicate the thought.
"weren't you telling utahime that you had to get up early for training? it's so late..." you point at the time
"I do," he shrugged, eyes on the emerging road
"I'm sorry," you lightly pout in guilt
suguru gives you a quick once over and he grins so faintly, "I don't mind."
"let me send you money for a coffee or something." you turn in your seat to look at him pleadingly, eyes scanning him for any hint of resentment
he laughs
"I'm flattered," he smirks, amusement lingering in his tone, "but I'm not taking your money."
you slump in your seat at the rejected offer before you remember something and quirk up in your seat a little
"at least let me give you the gift I got you when we get to my place?"
"sounds like the perfect exchange." he nods
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when you wake up, its 1 p.m. and you're surprised you slept through the many alarms on your phone.
you remember everything from the night before and you're not hungover, thank god.
oh
you reminisce on the moments you shared with suguru, even the ones you're embarrassed about.
"arghhh why did I force him to walk all the way up for his gift," you groan into your pillow, "wasted like fifteen more minutes of his time."
a small shriek leaves you as you headbutt yourself on the bed, "why did I do that."
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its been about a week and a half since haibara's hang out. which has given you enough time to finally get used to being back home. you reorganized your place to accommodate for all the trinkets and decor you brought from Europe and cleaned out your closet.
you finished everything in time for your hangout with satoru
"Hey Toru." you lean down to give him a quick hug from where he's seated snugly, slurping on a sundae
and suguru
"hey." you breathe, not gulping when he gets up and hugs you to greet you.
when you sit down, you notice your heart is racing and your breathing is just a bit labored
probably the long walk over
"we got you strawberry mochi and a matcha latte," gojo mutters through the straw he's still slurping on, eyes zoned in on particularly nowhere? on the table in front of you all.
never separate this man from his sweets...
"oh thank you satoru." you say appreciatively, happy he thought of you
"thank suguru," he mutters back, "he paid."
your eyes drift to suguru, who smiles unphased, and lifts a hand up to minimize the gesture of paying for you, "satoru knew your order already, I just offered to pay."
"oh," you try not seem too disappointed that he didn't go out of his way to know your order, "well, still, thank you."
"it's no problem." he settled back into his seat comfortably
"didn't offer to pay for my sundae." satoru rolled his eyes
geto's eyes creased a little, as if internally smiling, and said, "didn't you eat out almost a third of my fridge yesterday?"
"whatever," satoru rolled his eyes, "buy me a second sundae then, im already finishing this one up."
"I'm not familiar with anything you've just said. are you feeling light-headed?"
"oh puh-lease," satoru starts to nag, "you can hear me just fine. stop acting like an idiot."
suguru fakes a look of confusion and concern, which makes satoru bolt up out of his seat and start heading towards the door to enter the parlor. and you're pretty sure you hear him say something about taking a bite out of your mochi when you're not looking.
the idiocy makes you giggle a little and you don't notice when suguru turns his head from looking over at a grumpy satoru to you, a slight upturn of his lip at being able to make you laugh.
flash!
after a blinding white light attacks your eyes, you're met with five schoolgirls, all with their phones out.
you'd think they'd be ashamed but?
"you guys are going on my Pinterest!" one giggles
another one is laughing almost as if she's on a sugar rush, very manically, "I hope my boyfriend is as hot as him one day. oh my god. aha aha ahahahahah!"
"you're so so so pretty." a ditsy one with a valley accent deadpans, nearing your face and making immense eye contact, "I know that you guys have the hottest sex."
your jaw drops and you look at suguru in shock, embarrassment out the door at being a coupe and more surprised by the actual words these teenagers are spilling out.
suguru's no better, no other movement on his face except for his raised eyebrows and wide eyes.
the ditsy one speaks again before they start to trail off, "I'm using you as hairspo for my next hair appointment."
and it goes in one ear and out the other because your mind is still stuck on the, 'I know that you guys have the hottest sex.'
what the fuck? what kind of crap was she imagining?
what was she thinking about?
hottest sex?
like flashbacks that never happened, vivid images of you on your knees and suguru drilling into you from behind play in your mind quickly.
he's so big in person and the thought is so palpable when he's next to you...
stop!
you feel your cheeks heating up and a shiver runs up your back.
you try to laugh to brush it all off, "they were probably high or something. or just really really extroverted..."
the tips of suguru's ears are the slightest pink as he finally makes eye contact with you.
"yeah," he breathes, "without a doubt."
"what were those schoolgirls yappin about?" satoru asks, a bit careless, as he plops back into his seat, a new sundae in hand
"nothing."
"nothing."
satoru glares a little at the both of you, his brow quirked up a little, "yeah sure."
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you're shopping later at the mall with the both of them, a slight awkwardness between you and suguru that the both of you cover up by only really interacting with satoru and not the other unless satoru was involved in the interaction.
satoru is drowning in what looks like eight bags of clothes when he halts your walking and jeers his head towards the store next to him.
Victoria's Secret
"Didn't you come with us so you could buy new stuff here?"
Yes you had.
But that was before a group of teenagers made you feel awkward about discussing/associating anything nearing sex with suguru now.
"yeah..." you try not to stutter as you start to walk in
god, satoru is so unabashed and careless that he's going to accompany you too. and if satoru goes in, so does suguru. if suguru didn't want to, he would surely have to right now or else satoru would question him.
you know what, maybe suguru isn't overthinking it like you are. surely he isn't clinging on to the idea of sex with you.
yes, exactly.
bracing yourself, you walk into the store, pick up a bag, and ready yourself to start filling it up.
you've forgotten about your awkwardness with suguru after a while of being amazed by all the pretty options in front of you
and satoru, for the most part, is quite mature in this store.
for the most part...
"ha, look at those," he points at a mannequin wearing crotchless panties and at the same panties decorating the table beneath it, "get them."
disgruntled and rolling your eyes, you respond, "yeah sure when I'm getting screwed."
"girls wear lingerie for themselves you know."
"yeah I know," you huff, "and I do. but I can wear crotch on lingerie under my clothes. that's just plain old porn panties for not single people."
"you're such a debbie downer," he groans, "if I were a girl, id wear those with or without out a man."
"well, im a girl and you're not so." you say in a sing song voice as you check out a bra in your hands and toss it into your shopping bag.
"wait where's suguru?" gojo says, having noticed that his best friend's presence was quiet.
and that was all it merely was because suguru was scrolling through his phone, seemingly unphased by the store, paying no attention to what you and satoru were looking at.
"oh." gojo shrugs before he moves on to checking out more underwear with you.
and he spots a particularly cute set of babydoll's that you've grown enamored with, staring at all of them.
"those are very cute," your white-haired friend says
"and very expensive," you whine, having seen the price tag on one of them, "I don't know which one I want to take home."
"hm," satoru whirls around and looks between the mannequin wearing the see through pink one and the see through baby blue one.
"hey suguru." he calls out
suguru looks up from his phone and is slightly confused by where satoru's standing.
satoru has his chin in his hand, "which one do you think would look better on her."
suguru faintly gulps and quickly regains his normal calm confidence, slipping his phone back into his pocket.
"whichever one she'd feel the best in." his eyes smile for him
"oh don't be a prude," satoru gags before pestering him again, "really, pick one."
"why don't you pick satoru?"
"because I think both are too pretty." his eyes gleam, staring at both of the babydolls in question
suguru sighs then looks at you, who so happens to already be eyeing him down, eyes wide for a response.
"the pink one." he mutters quickly, eyes immediately darting away.
there's a loud sigh of relief from satoru when suguru finally makes a decision and you pick up the pink one sitting at the table.
"I think that's all for me," you breathe, skimming over the rest of the store quickly.
and before you make your way to the register line, you stop near suguru
"thank you sugu."
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it's a Friday night that you've got all yourself the next month following the incident with those girls and suguru.
you've shaved, washed and blow dried your hair, did a thorough skincare routine, and put on the babydoll you bought last month.
you feel hot and have plans...in mind.
you've seen a little bit of stuff on twitter just for a spur
and there you are, sitting on your dildo, cheeks heated as you sit up and down on it.
you're unabashedly thinking about suguru.
truth be told, you haven't been able to get him off your mind since those schoolgirls planted the thought of that hot sex with him.
he's just so big and lean.
god
you remember satoru making you go with him to pester suguru while he worked out, considering his gym was next to his apartment complex and he had agreed to invite you both and shoko for a watch party of the scream movies that day.
he looked mad when he trained on his kickboxing, eyebrows furrowed and eyes dark on whatever he was taking out his strikes on.
you figured he'd make a similar face beating your pussy up.
that same trail of sweat making its way down his spine. thigh veins twitching all the same at the force he'd use on you.
"su-"
knock knock
the blood drains from your face and you immediately feel yourself getting dry
"oh my god, who's here at 10 p.m.?!" you whisper shout to yourself as you scram to put your dildo back in its hiding place and through your night robe on.
you take a breather and check through your door's peephole
a big blue eye meets yourself and zooms out when satoru leans back and reveals that suguru is also with him.
you open the door quickly, slightly angry.
"why are you guys here?"
you keep your eyes on satoru, afraid even looking at suguru would reveal somehow that you'd just been vividly imagining sitting on his dick.
satoru seems impressed as he looks at your very short night robe, thighs out in the open and he shrugs, raising a bag of fast food in his hand, "wanted to hang out with you."
unable to refute his friendly gesture, you move so that the both of them can come in.
"you were ready for bed early," he comments, setting down the food on your kitchen island.
"it's ten p.m. satoru." you sigh, spotting that they didn't get drinks, so you try to find some cups for the Diet Coke in your fridge.
you realize they're in a cupboard.
that you'd have to lean up to
you're about to ask satoru to help you, but he's far too focused in setting out the food for all of you and suguru's just there, standing watching you and satoru, mostly you, in awkward silence.
"um, suguru," you pipe
he fully turns his attention to you. argh, you didn't think having 100% percent of his attention would be so drastic than having 80% of it as opposed to earlier, but it did
"can you get some cups from here?" you point at the cupboard, "I'd get them but uh-"
you look down at your very short nightrobe and exposed skin and suguru's ears turn pink at the tips
"yeah, no problem." he says quickly, moving to open the cupboard and gets out three ceramic pink cups.
you, meanwhile, open your fridge and get the Diet Coke jug you've had chilling, thankful you put it in the top shelf and not the bottom, having avoided the risk of bending to get it.
you sit down next to suguru, unfortunately, since satoru took the single seat across.
"so," you start to pour drinks for all of you, "what were you guys up to before this?"
"nothing," satoru mumbles through a mouthful of fries, "we were supposed to watch t.v. at suguru's place but the internet went out in his building."
one of your brows raises, "and you came to hog my t.v.?"
"no," satoru glares at you a little, "the burger place was right by your place and I wanted to stop by."
"plus," he adds, "I didn't bank on you being ready for bed so early."
then something lights up in his head and he stares at you quizzically, a smirk forming, "were you getting off before we got here? is that why you're all dolled up and dressed for bed like you've got first name dil last name do coming over?"
"ugh," you groan, "gross, satoru!"
"shoko and I went with you to buy that eight inch purple girth monster," he laughs, "you were sooooooo on it."
you roll your eyes and decide to ignore him, taking a bite out of the burger in front of you.
"take it easy on her satoru," suguru swoops in softly to defend you, "I remember how disgruntled you were when I found you with the door open during our time as roommates."
"hey! we agreed to never mention that to anyone else!"
you start to laugh, embarrassment only a tinge less than it was before, thanks to suguru.
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although their sudden presence had interrupted your orgasm, you looked forward to the moment in which they would leave.
but satoru somehow, being the annoying giant he is, finds a way to make suguru and him stay the night at your place.
"satoru, I don't think my back can support sharing this couch with you." suguru tries to reason
"oh come onnnnn, we've shared less at frat parties before" satoru chippers, beginning to roll himself into a ball in one of your blankets.
pitifully, you share a look with suguru and hand him a blanket.
"sleep well guys." you yawn before turning off the lights and heading to your room.
your very empty room.
and you can feel your panties dampening again.
no you shouldn't.
you get into your bed and stuff yourself under covers, hoping your body gets the message that it needs to sleep.
it doesn't
so you count sheep.
nope
force your eyes closed and hope it just knocks you out.
nope, you were in that weird limbo of sleep and no sleep.
you don't know how much time has passed but you assume its late enough that both of the boys are asleep, so you shoot up out of your bed and lean over to open your nightstand, flipping your covers off in the process.
the desperation never wore off, your panties were drenched and you didn't even have to play with yourself to spread your lubrication or open yourself up a little.
biting the bullet, you lift a leg up with one arm and use the other to press the head of your dildo inside.
your breathing was extra labored, but that was nothing compared to the moans you'd let out if your friends weren't sleeping in the room next door.
then you start fucking it into yourself slowly, inch by inch, and it feels oh so good. even if it was see through, you pull down the straps of your nightgown and let your tits out, letting the air hit them and put you in a further state of vulnerability.
then in a matters of seconds, you're pounding yourself as hard as you can without making a noise from either lips.
your eyes are rolling back and it's hitting that angle so well that-
the relief washed over you faster than expected, orgasm a little ruined because you wanted to relish in the feeling longer.
so there you are, dildo still inside, one hand over your stomach while you let your breathing go back to normal.
"I needed that anyways." you whisper to yourself, feeling your chest heaving up and down.
knock knock
"you've got to be fucking kidding me." you shriek to yourself in the quietest manner possible as you rapidly stash your dildo away and fix your nightgown back on.
you dash to your door and open it a little, only letting the top of your head and eyes peer through the side considering what you were wearing.
there's suguru, hair down and shirt ridden up just a little, face a little surprised at the way you opened the door
"yes?" you ask, quickly peering at his happy trail
"is it alright if I use the restroom?" he asks, a little sleepy
"yeah," you gulp, "just let me get back in bed so I'm not indecent when you come in."
"alright, just tell me when."
and you leap onto your bed, immediately tugging your cover on top of you.
"you can come in." you say meekly, hoping he can't see how disheveled you are. the moon was especially bright tonight and it always lit up your room nicely during nights like this.
suguru opens the door immediately and smiles at you a little as he walks towards your restroom.
you smile awkwardly back
he pees you assume, because you've barely seen three tiktoks on your phone by the time he comes out.
"did I wake you?" he asks while he approaches you on your bed, taking a seat at the end.
having him so near the spot where you just pummeled yourself to orgasm made you shiver a little in fear.
"no," you almost stutter and put your phone down, "I was struggling to sleep."
"so was I" he laughs a little, "satoru sleeps so selfishly."
and your blabber mouth, stupid fake facade that you aren't affected at all by him speaks up.
"you can sleep with me."
you're both caught by surprise at your offer except only suguru expresses it, his eyebrows have raised innocently
and you cough up another remark, "it's not like you can really see what I'm wearing and you can just turn to the other side."
"I don't want to make you uncomfortable-" he's about to get up
and you act so stupidly again
"I don't mind suguru, your body needs good rest with all the strain you put on it." and there you are, flipping the covers open from the other side of your bed and tapping it for him to get into.
hesitantly, he gets up from the end of your bed and walks towards the open spot, "are you sure?"
"yeah," you nod, other hand hidden under the cover and gripping the sheets under you, "we've slept cramped up next to each other on road trips. what's the difference with all this space?"
you both know the difference
but he slowly gets under the covers with you anyways, positioning himself on his back, stiff as a board as he looks up and tries not to look at you, well that's what it looks like and you understand why.
"I'm sorry if I snore." you peep, also staring up at the ceiling
suguru turns to look at you a little, "you snore?"
"I don't know..."you respond, following in his lead and peeking at him from the corner of your eyes, "but I'd be really embarrassed if I did."
"well, I'm sorry if I do too." he gives you a small smile, one of those tight lipped ones, no teeth, just the softness the moment in them.
then your phone suddenly starts ringing loudly.
and you scram to shut it off, putting your phone on night mode
"who was that?" suguru peers at you, neck turned more to look at you now.
you gulp, "some guy from paris. I should block him soon anyways."
"you were seeing each other?"
well you did go out with him various times and continuously stayed lots of nights with him. hell you even showered with him a couple times.
"hardly." you brush off
"shoko would talk about you always spending the night at a Claude's place. didn't you text her that you had to pay for your own uber once?" he said it so smoothly, without a thought
you shrink a little into the bed, "well yeah but I never saw him as something serious and we never sealed the deal. I didn't think you'd know about him..."
"shoko often aired out what you'd be texting her in the moment." he breathed, one arm behind his head as he went back to staring at the ceiling again.
"so you know about how hard I partied and stuff?" you asked, hoping that maybe they showed him all your selfies and outfits, casual and sexy.
"yes." he nodded
he seemed so serious and a hopeful part of you wanted to say he seemed...jealous?
does he think you saw a lot of guys on your nights out? what is he thinking?
"I liked it," you started, making the path for a way to comfort him if that was the case, "but I wasn't a big fan of having guys try to pull me to dance with them. I missed you and satoru being there to stop guys from hogging on me."
his ears perk up a little and he looks at you again, almost as if he's waiting for you to continue, so you do, stupidly but it was at attempt
"I'm just glad I'm back with you guys."
"I'm glad you're back too."
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"you guys finally freak it?"
you get a sudden whiplash and wake up to find satoru standing at the end of your bed, one leg propped up on it while he brushes his teeth.
you lean up, making sure to cover yourself with the covers and notice the comfort of suguru's arm leaving your head.
HUH
you're at a distance from him, you would've definitely noticed his body pressed against yours, but he's turned in your direction, one long arm splayed out and oh my god
you had been using it as a pillow.
he starts to wake up too at satoru's sudden intrusion and squints sleepily at him, starting to stretch a little. the covers must've shoved off of him a little because you can see his v-line when he groans.
which reminds you that he must've not recalled/felt you on his arm just now. he probably would've been so awkward.
you calm yourself down enough and go back to looking at satoru.
"oh probably not." satoru, with a mouth full of toothpaste, mumbles without a shame after looking at suguru still being fully clothed and your reaction at sleeping on him
"satoru," your vision and brain is still blurry from waking up, "is that my toothbrush?!"
"no," he borbles offended before walking back into your restroom and beginning to clean his mouth out with water, "I have a go-go bag here."
"since when do you have a go-go bag here? and where the hell did you hide it?"
"since you left me your apartment key to take care of your place before leaving," he's already spit out the last of his toothpaste and is sassily walking back to you and suguru, "and I have it in your closet all the way at the top."
you fall back into your bed, rolling your eyes at his weirdness, "why do you still knock then?"
"I have manners?" he looks at you like you just asked a stupid question
"I found his bag in my laundry room." suguru sighs, running his hands through his face.
"well it's impossible to hide anything in your apartment considering we're the same height." satoru rolls his eyes, "haibara's like 5'10 so he can't see that I have mine at the top cupboard above his stove."
"normal habits follow you satoru," suguru sighs, flipping the covers off his lower half and standing up, "but you outrun it."
"track was my thing in high school." he shrugs
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you haven't seen suguru since then. it's been two weeks and you've no sight of him. you were hoping he'd make an appearance at satoru's apartment today, seeing as he was hosting a House of the Dragon watch party.
"oh suguru? he's not coming," satoru shrugs as he plops onto his couch, next to shoko and tugs the bowl of popcorn from her, "he's working on his startup. something about a big client needing something by tomorrow."
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then it's been another week, no sight of suguru with anyone at any hangout.
you don't feel that optimistic when haibara and satoru beg the group to show up to the club tonight, with pregaming at satoru's apartment.
you're dressed in a tight little white dress when you show up to satoru's apartment, clinging onto shoko's arm because of how cold it was.
and you feel so happy that you still put 100% of effort into getting ready because there was suguru, seated on one of satoru's couches, watching in amusement as haibara attempts to teach satoru how to make a negroni.
your own excitement blinds you and without thinking, you slip in past everyone and stand in front of him.
"I thought you wouldn't be coming tonight." you look at him in slight marvel, astonished that he finally made an appearance
he makes a face of surprise at you, well you think it's surprise at what you said. you probably came off too strong because his ears turned a little red. what else could it be?
god he was taking a little too long to respond. had he been trying to avoid you? was he-
"it wouldn't be gentlemanly of me to leave your protection solely up to satoru would it?"
and just like that his soothing voice brushes over your entire body
"it would not." you giggle a little when you sit next to him, hoping your perfume reaches him and relishing in the fact that his arm was already hung over the part of the couch you inhabited.
"but what have you been up to? I haven't seen you in a while."
suguru's eyes soften at your curiosity, and unbeknownst to you, his heart swelled at the fact that you noticed his absence.
"I've been finishing up a personal project of mine," he says warmly, "if all goes well, I'll probably come close to affording an apartment like satoru's soon."
affording an apartment like satoru's soon?
that's like
a lot of money
a lot
and why is him getting more money in his bank account making you fawn even harder for him
well, the stability, duh.
but you have to act cool
"are you sure you want to live in the same apartment complex as satoru gojo?" you tease?
"I said like," he shoves your leg a little with his own, "I don't think I would be able to stand living under the same roof as him again."
"well I don't think he could either," you giggle, "he says you're too much of a homebody and always say you have food at home."
suguru makes no attempt to defend himself and shakes his head instead at the complaint from his best friend, "I find it wrong to say I'm guilty when there's nothing guilty about cooking your own meals."
"are you good at cooking? I know you posted on your close friends about some meals here and there, but it's been a while since you deactivated your account."
"I'd like to think I'm good," he pauses, looking at you for a moment before continuing, "I'd make a pasta for you but I don't want to challenge the likes of Italy and France."
"now that just sounds like an excuse to not cook for me," you squint your eyes and scrunch your nose at him playfully
"I make no excuses," suguru drinks from the glass of water in his hand, eyeing you with the same playful aura, "I'll let you try if you want, but you can't make any comparisons."
"deal." you huff a little, reaching your hand out towards him.
"deal." he agrees, setting down his glass to shake your hand.
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you don't drink a lot in the pregame
or at the club
something about suguru being there, sober, and able to control every moment makes you want to do the same.
so you're surprised that you're not at all even tipsy when you gently grab his hand and motion for him to dance with you amongst the crowd of your friends and other strangers.
it doesn't really feel awkward.
satoru's dragged you plenty of times to dance with him. haibara's kinda twerked on you a couple of times.
how is this any different?
at least that's how your mind approaches it, unphased by the sensual rnb music and your waist in suguru's hand.
when your arms reach around his neck eventually, you note he smells intoxicating, like amber and leather.
when you've known the club to normally be a place where you cause a ruckus with satoru and haibara, this is quite the opposite.
you didn't know you could feel so grounded
maybe it was the lack of alcohol to spur on the party animal in you, but this was fine. your brain felt woozy enough from breathing in suguru's cologne.
it's only when you feel a tap on your back that you and suguru are interrupted.
suguru juts his jaw for you to look behind and when you turn, there's shoko a lighter and a cigarette in her hands. you and suguru follow her outside for her smoke break, the bare minimum for her protection, a norm.
"how come you haven't been following satoru's pace tonight with the drinking?" she sighs melodically as she puts a cig in her mouth and cusps a hand around it while the other lights it.
"um," you avoid suguru's presence, feeling something that you just can't quite point your finger at, "I think im pmsing, so...I don't want to trigger any cramps with the drinking."
"fair enough." she blows out a puff of smoke as she says that
"and when are you going to ever drink again suguru?" she lets her head fall on her shoulder, lazy eyes looking at him.
"when are you going to stop smoking those?" he asks in return, leaning against the wall behind him and looking at the people in passerby considering this was a busy street during the night.
"soon." she shrugs
you and suguru exchange a look between each other at the response. shoko's been saying that since freshman year.
and your small moment is interrupted when you see a frantic utahime waving her hand, nanami and haibara holding up a very pale satoru between them as they walk out of the club and towards you guys.
the three of you meet them at the middle and utahime starts to explain.
"satoru threw up on this vip table trying to make it in time to the restroom..." a slight look of disgust on her face
"you guys know I can't stand the smell of cheap vape smokeeee~"he whines from between his two friends, body slumped over
"oh." you also grimace imagining the situation
"we're going to walk him back to his place." utahime tries to convey with sorry eyes that she's sad the night had to end like this
"it's okay." you say and turn to shoko, "are you going with them?"
her place was on the same side of town as theirs, and they were probably going to stay at satoru's anyway. he had more than three bedrooms and was always ready for sleepovers.
"yeah," she says, moving forward to poke at satoru's chest, almost as if he were a lab rat, "you guys fine to-"
"nice tits pretty girl!" you hear a holler next to your ear
and its some guy walking by with his two other friends, clearly inebriated but its also clearly not enough for him to blame the behavior on it. and his target couldn't be anymore obvious when he's making the nastiest eye contact with you, or more so your chest.
"come again?" suguru says sternly at him, he didn't yell but...
you could hear him well and clear alright.
the guy stops walking and turns to you and suguru, speaking with a sassy stupor, "I said her tits were nice."
you look up behind you and suguru is biting his cheek, something you've never seen from him. you can tell he's mad and so can the other guy.
"you her boyfriend or something?" he smirks, relishing in the way suguru scowls at him as he nears the both of you, "if you're not saying shit ill fuck her little pussy right in front of-"
BAM!
multiple oohs are heard when suguru sucker punches him. and height is the only thing that helps your offender, because he does manage to stay up and land a punch to suguru's nose.
but before you can react and head over to check on him, like lightning, the guy is the ground after suguru hands him an uppercut.
and there goes satoru, vomiting on the side of the road too.
which you don't seem phased by because suguru just defended your honor, and won, so quickly.
but you're also really worried because his nose is bleeding when he turns around.
ignoring the pain of your heels finally setting in, you click clack over to him and move the hand he's using to grab at his nose so you can inspect him.
you're not sure if he can tell you're somewhere between feeling lusty and worried when he looks down at you, but he looks serious still as he makes eye contact with you.
and satoru barfs even more
"I can't handle blooddddd~" he cries which ushers a panicked utahime into calling shoko over and asking if you'd be fine heading back with suguru, making sure he's fine at the end of it.
when they start heading off, you pull out your phone from your purse, "let me get us an uber to your place."
your hands are shaking a little in adrenaline and you jump a little when suguru swipes your phone from your hand and hands you his, uber app already open.
he's continuously wiping his nose as he painfully murmurs, "not letting you leave my place alone, I'll drop you off at yours first, put your address, I'll pay."
worriedly, you want to deny him, but the thought is intimidated out of you when he stares you down.
"ok-okay." you speak a little shakily
so much for you thinking you'd be cool and calm in a situation like this.
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you dragged suguru into your apartment the moment you got to your place. you had finally noticed the small cut on his nose bridge and near his eye and really insisted on patching him up.
you also were scared that he'd somehow get a brain bleed and die on the way home out of sheer anxiety. so you wanted to keep an eye on him for a while to keep your mind at ease.
suguru is sitting at the edge of your bed, watching as you rummage through your restroom for your first aid kid. and when you finally find it, you're rushing to him and setting it down next to him, beginning to filter through it for the alcohol wipes.
"close your eyes," you ask breathlessly, still feeling the after effects of your adrenaline, "I don't want to irritate your eyes accidentally."
suguru listens to you and closes his eyes, a slight grimace already on his face in preparation for the sting you're about to bring to his cuts.
he hisses a little when you press on them
"sorry."
"it's okay." his eyes scrunch a little and you can see his hand on his lap, opening and closing as a reflex to the sting.
then you take out the antibiotic ointment to start spreading a little on his wounds. his body relaxes a little when he sees that the bothersome part is over and he keeps his eyes open, watching you.
you feel so hot under his gaze, you can't help but blabber when you're in the process of putting cream on his nose bridge
"you really have been putting the work in at kickboxing huh." you say awkwardly, trying to do a fake laugh, but
"did I scare you?"
suguru's burning a hole into your face with how intensely he's looking at you
you almost choke on your breath
"no."
"you were shaking when you were typing your address on my phone."
oh he noticed
you didn't want him to misunderstand
"well you didn't scare me, but I was scared for you, still am. I don't want you to drop dead on the street." you answer a little shakily, having forgotten to reach for the small bandaids.
"besides what girl gets scared of the guy who defends her honor..." you add
"shoko almost gagged when nanami made a guy apologize to her." he quips
"well that's shoko," you shrug and look off to the side, "I liked it."
you're about to reach for the bandaids when his hand on is holding onto one of your arms, gentle but it sustains all your attention.
"what do you mean?"
"well we all know shoko's a lesb-"
"no, when you said you liked it."
explaining that to him is complicated. when you said that you liked it you know that you mean that your panties got a little sticky watching him spit out blood that tried to seep into his mouth from his nose. the memory makes you subconsciously rub your thighs together. but you'll just brush it off as a normal like, as in it flattered you.
unbeknownst to you, suguru spotted the movement between your legs.
"it was flatte-"
"then why do you look so nervous trying to tell me that?"
a bit exasperated and heavily flustered, you stomp your foot a little and avoid looking at him, "suguru, please stop. you're making me nervous."
"what's there to be nervous about?"
"we're just friends." he adds
and his eyes light up watching when your own shoot towards him, your offense front and center.
and for the first time, you can see how he looks at you with so much yearning?
"am I wrong?"
christ, has he always looked at you with this much desire?
you're speechless and even though the signs are pointing towards the obvious, you still form a sentence that spares your feelings.
"do you want to be wrong?"
"yeah."
you feel shaky again
and it's not because you're scared.
"can you please stop looking at me like that?" you beg, avoiding his eyes again, almost about to hyperventilate from the pressure his stare is putting on you.
he grabs your other hand and leers you close to him, breath tickling your neck since you're so stubborn on not looking at him.
"do you still want to be friends?" he asks
and even though it sounds seductive and suave, you can make out the slight genuine yearning to know if that's what you want.
so you look at him again, trying to swallow the nervous lump in your throat
"you know how I feel." you plead
"no I don't," he laughs a little painfully, "I've never said anything because I don't know, so tell me."
you stare at each other for a while, his patience everlasting as you muster up the courage to say something that shouldn't be so embarrassing.
"I don't want to be friends."
"do you want me to go home?" he asks, thumbs rubbing circles on your wrists.
and its the quickest answer you've given him so far
"no."
and you want it
bad.
so so so bad.
but you have to get the question off of your chest.
"what-what do you want to be?"
"each other's if you'll have me." he breathes, looking up at you still
he's saying all the right things. and he's here. you're freshly shaved and waxed and wearing the hottest lingerie under this. fucking hell you wouldn't even need foreplay to take him right now, you're preening at the thought of having him.
"do you think satoru packs condoms in his go-go bag?"
it just slips out of your mouth so easily and you want to be embarrassed, but you're to eager for that.
"I know he does." suguru gets up quickly, eyes darting to your closet and then to you, "are you sure?"
and it's like some sort of instincts take over because you take the hands that are holding yours and place them on your tits, motioning for him to squeeze them.
"I'm really sure."
the action has him baffled, a pink flush face you've never seen on him while he stands there taken aback. it gives you a little confidence to remove his hands and take off your dress. then you let him watch as you get on the bed, sitting on your heels as you take his hands in yours again to plead.
"I want you in me suguru."
"fuck." he curses, before rushing towards your closet and yanking the infamous go-go bag and tossing it next to the bed. he starts to take his shirt off soon after, immediately reaching for your face when he gets into the bed with you
he's a sensual kisser. sensual as in you're pretty sure it'd be illegal to kiss him in public.
he kisses like he's fucking your mouth with his own. and it has you shivering into his touch, pussy aching for him to fill you up.
you pull him in by the belt loops of his jeans and whine, "take it out please."
your words make him groan into your mouth and he reaches one hand down to help yours unzipper his pants and push them down.
you feel his raw length slap across and press onto your mound when he grinds against you
"you haven't done this before right." he almost says darkly as he stares down at where your bodies would be meeting soon.
"no." you moan, watching him as he stuffs his dick under your panties and slides it back and forth on your pussy lips.
he shivers at the contact and dips his head into your neck, mouthing and biting at the skin there, "fuck, you're actually drenched."
and for a moment, you both get rigid at the euphoric feeling of his tip catching on your hole so easily.
"I'm not sure I'm going to last long with you right now," he all but exhales shakily, hips still moving back and forth against you
"that's fine, just keep going."
and he's about to reach over in the bag for a condom when your lust takes over so much that you stop him and line him up with your hole.
"just do it like that please."
he moans as your ministrations and looks at you for reassurance, "are you sure?"
you can tell he's fighting so hard not to move
"just use my pussy please suguru, I need it so bad." you complain, reaching down to pull your panties further to the side, chest heaving from carnal need for him.
suguru leans closer to pull your see through bra down, and begins to suck harshly on one of your nipples when he starts bullying his cock into you.
you can feel every vein when he starts to sink into you and fuck, his tip is so snug and big, the feeling of it ridging against your insides every time he brings it in and out is dizzying.
you're so focused on the feeling of his thick dick filling you up that you've barely noticed how suguru's folded your legs back. both of you now entranced in the way he's balls deep in you, a loud wet pap sound accompanying every thrust of his.
"you like that sweet girl?" he heaves through deep fast thrusts, mesmerized by the way your stomach moves just a little every time he bottoms out.
words aren't something you're capable of right now because when you try to respond, all you let out is shriek
this is nothing compared to the way you've tried to pummel yourself with your dildo. his hands are everywhere and he's got you right where he wants you. you can't escape him.
and when you thought he couldn't his pace and force grows stronger.
you're basically screaming now.
"yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes." is all you can say, so dumb on his cock that you can't help but want more and more
"fuck, don't talk like that," he groans, almost as if to himself, "I'm gonna end up creaming your pussy if you keep that up."
"cream it please." you beg loudly, "wanna feel us get messy."
your tongue is basically salivating at the though of his balls coated in cum and slapping against your clit, strings of mess forming from how intense it is.
and he starts twitching into you, rushing to kiss you as he pumps inside of you. thank goodness, it feels like its spilling out of you in heaps.
you're so happy, so so happy.
"let's do doggy yeah?" you pull him in by wrapping an arm around his neck, grinding your hips against him for more
"whatever you want," he nearly whines, pulling out of you just so he can flip you over and push your back down.
you feel hornier like this, pussy more exposed and growing needier with the feeling of his cum seeping out of you. it makes you wiggle your ass for him to fuck you more already.
and without warning he does just that, slipping into you again and gripping your ass so hard when he starts using you like a fleshlight.
"fuck, yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes," he mumbles to himself, "tiny fucking wet pussy. love it so fucking much. fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck."
you're thoughtless, just utterly brain dead from how hard he's going on you, from how much your pussy is getting split open again and again.
this goes on for hours, so many positions covered by you and suguru. foreplay was never involved at all during that time, neither of you wanting to go without feeling each other so crudely connected for more than a second.
you actually fall asleep cockwarming him even, the both of you too stubborn to stop that you fell asleep still trying to get it on.
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neither you or suguru hear the jingle of your apartment door being opened later that day. both too fucked out and tired to wake up.
but you do hear when the door to your own bedroom opens, and suguru quickly gets on the defensive, covering you with your bedsheets and about to-
"satoru!" you both yell.
"woah," you hear laughing through the door, "you guys really stayed up all night fucking? everybody's been calling you guys since two."
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bunnis-monsters · 3 months ago
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Betrayal of the Queen
Part 1
Endings:
Forgive
No forgiveness(Kofi/Patreon Only)
Yandere Sons take out the old hive(Kofi/Patreon Only)
A/N: Hii, this was available to kofi/patreon early, and some of the endings will be exclusively there! Also, the relationship between you and your bee hybrid sons is completely platonic! It’s pretty obvious in this fic but I get weird questions and just want to clarify. Thanks!
They regret not appreciating your kindness and soft nature when they appoint their new queen.
She was taller, more lithe and graceful. They threw you out the second they saw her on the street. Your sons of course followed, shocked and devastated that their own fathers and fellow hive would do this to you!
You had served as the queen for nearly five years now, creating the new generation and caring for them with all your heart.
But you were a bit fragile, not able to bear as many young as the previous queen. The hive had loved you at first, adoring you endlessly, but when they noticed how little eggs made it to the birthing stage, they realized that you may not ever rebuild their hive in the way that they hoped.
They slowly began to stop caring for you as much, leaving your care to your sons. Some of the hive even went out and flirted with other females, leaving you to incubate those eggs with only your children by your side.
Most grew resentful, seeing you as nothing more than a burden to the hive.
By the fifth year, the only bees in the hive that had remained loyal to you were the very ones you birthed.
Your children disliked how you were treated, but stayed because taking you away may cause issues. Your safety was their top priority, but they were also deeply in tune with your emotions.
The hive stopped even pretending to care near the end, shunning you for not being a good enough queen. They buzzed around haughtily, being so bold as to bring other females into the hive right in front of you!
Your heart ached. At first you had truly loved that hive, sacrificing most of your human life and your body to bare eggs in a womb that could barely maintain them.
You had done so much, yet they didn't seem to care.
In their hearts they knew they were being cruel. But they were selfish and greedy, wanting the hive to flourish... but that couldn't happen with you around.
"She'll be banished."
Your sons stared at the council member in shock as they announced the decision. "Are you joking? She's the queen, you can't-"
"It states that if a queen is no longer fit to rule, then she will be banished and a new queen will be chosen. When a queen can't lay the right amount of eggs, she cannot function correctly."
One of your sons, the prince stepped forward, his wings buzzing threateningly. "You've treated her like garbage for years, and now you're going to abandon her? Is that really how we treat a queen?"
"Hardly a queen, if you ask me."
A female said, crossing her legs. The prince turned on his heels, hissing. "You shouldn't even be in this hive, the queen is the only female allowed-"
"She's not the queen anymore. Get her out and leave."
The bee hybrids watched in awe as every single son of hers stood. "If she leaves, we leave with her. You've all become so greedy, taking advantage of our mother and pushing her to her limits and expecting her to just roll over and take it. You're a disgrace to the bee hybrid name."
You were in tears when your crown was taken, crying into one of your son's chests. Your sons took up about 1/3 of the hive, and left with you.
The new queen had been already lined up to take your place. She was thin, tall, and beautiful, all that they could have asked for.
But she was also manipulative and cruel.
"The drones? Do we really need to help them? They're replaceable, aren't they?"
She crossed her legs, staring on in boredom as a worker bee reported to her. "But my queen, the drones are stuck in a storm, shouldn't we at least try to help them?"
"Of course not, I don't really care if they live or die.
I'm the queen, the most important. Shouldn't you just be happy I'm here and producing eggs?"
It quickly became obvious that the new queen cared not about her subjects, only about expanding her power and rule. The people starved, the babies hated their mother. She refused to even look at them once they were born, moving on to start another clutch.
The new queen picked only the most handsome and fit bee hybrids to mate with, creating only a small gene pool. This meant that the ones she mated with were constantly tired, and the others were increasingly sexually frustrated.
A few bee hybrids sat in a common room, depressed.
"Remember when the old queen would come down here and listen to our woes? She would mate with all of the hive, not just a select few..."
"The old queen made sure that the elders were taken care of. Not a single senior was left behind."
"She was so warm and soft, the new queen has no warmth in her body or soul."
They missed you.
But could they ever say they deserved you back?
Thinking of the years of neglect and mistreatment, of how they had taken your love and kindness for granted…
It all came to an end when the queen came before the council. She was as cold as ever, her eyes empty as she spoke.
"Thank you all for making me your queen and being so... stupid."
Her vacant eyes glanced over the room, and suddenly the smell of decay became almost overwhelming as her body began to wriggle and shift.
"That previous queen of yours had been keeping us at bay for nearly five years, and you let us in easily."
The new queen was ripped apart, parasite wasp larvae falling onto the ground and wriggling towards the nearest bee hybrid, attaching themselves and burrowing into their abdomen.
The room erupted into a frenzy of bees being eaten alive while others tried to escape. Even after leaving the room, several council members were seized by infected bees, taking them down with the rest of the hive.
Only around 100 members of the original hive survived, and while they flew away from the remnants of their home, all they could think about was you.
In all your years of being queen, you had been fighting to keep them safe. You tried so hard, barely able to lay eggs due to the intense stress of taking on the imminent threat of the parasite wasp hybrids alone.
You hid all of the pain, all of the work you did just to give them some peace of mind… and they repaid you by abandoning you when you needed them most.
You hadn’t failed them as a queen, no. They failed you as a hive. The hive wouldn’t exist without you, and had quickly fallen to ruin with your absence.
All they could hope for was that you would forgive them.
~
You smiled to yourself, one of you infant sons sleeping on your lap as your new hive buzzed around you. Without all the stress that had been piled on you, incubating eggs was easy.
“Mother, I’ve prepared your dinner.”
One of your sons nuzzled his antennae against your forehead in a sign of innocent affection before setting your plate on your nightstand. Even when they got older, they were still your babies.
Your sons had quickly formed a hive with you after you were banished, and now you lived a happy life with them and the new bee hybrids that joined.
Any bees that had been ostracized were welcome to join, and your sons personally interviewed each new possible mate of the queen to make sure they wouldn’t betray you.
After all, they loved their mom, and wanted you to be happy over anything else. They didn’t care if you laid eggs or not, they could spend the rest of their days snuggling with and taking care of you and be perfectly content.
But you wanted to have more children, to make a new hive where you’d be loved and happy.
Of course, any wish you had would be fulfilled. They set off and gathered any bee hybrids they could, wanting their mama to find her confidence in being a queen again.
It felt nice to be able to mate again, to be loved intimately. The new bee hybrids were loving and gentle, appreciating every soft curve of your body answ kissing away any tears you shed from your lingering insecurities.
Your sons worked on building a hive and producing honey while the new bee hybrids helped you with creating new children to add on to the hive. You felt like one, big, happy family.
It all came to a halt when the bees guarding the entrance to your hive brought forth an intruder.
You instantly recognized him as a council member from your old hive.
Memories of all the awful things they said and the circumstances of your banishment came to your mind, making your breathing quicken.
“My queen-“
“Don’t you dare call her that, you scum!”
The prince said, standing in front of you protectively “She isn’t your queen anymore, you made that decision yourself.”
The council member hung his head in shame. “… I know. Trust me, we all regret that deeply.”
You gently pulled the prince to you, giving his antennae a gentle caress to calm him down. Even if he was a prince, he was still one of your sons, and they were all angry on your behalf.
When you stayed silent, the former council member continued. “The hive… it’s gone. The new queen was a pawn for the parasitic wasps.”
This caused your hive to buzz anxiously. Many of the new members were from broken or destroyed hives by those hybrids.
Some were just little ones, torn away from their mothers, watching as the queens that birthed them were killed. Their tiny bodies trembled as they clung to your side, of course you had adopted them.
“Why do you darken my doorway, saying such things in front of the children?” you said, gathering the terrified babies into your arms. “You have no business here, I’ve been banished.”
“My queen-“
The prince was across the room in a split second, holding a knife to the former council member’s throat. “Don’t make me tell you again, scum. That is my mother, not your queen.”
You lifted a hand, and the prince backed away slightly, but stayed within arms reach. “… what about the new queen’s children?”
“… most of them were infected with the queen’s parasites. Those that we could save were in a dire state, while the rest perished.”
You let out a distressed whine, clutching one of the orphans' hands to comfort them. It wasn’t easy being a mother and hearing about the death of children.
“And what do you want from me?”
He took a moment to think before speaking. “Shelter for the children… they’re scared and hungry, most of them have severe injuries and illnesses as well.”
“… alright. Basil, please contact the worker bees and have them set up a temporary quarantine room, with enough room to accommodate 30 children.”
You sat back down on your throne, peering down at the former council member. He had been someone you had loved, even mated with years ago. A few of your sons were a result of that… yet in this moment you resented him and all the previous hive had done.
“I will only be taking in the children.”
Before he could protest, he stopped himself and stood. “I understand… please, do not hate them because of what we did. They are innocent in this.”
As you watched over the construction of the quarantine room, you occasionally glanced outside.
Your former hive members, at least, what was left of them was gathered around. They gave up their children, only wanting their survival.
When they spotted you looking, they stared up at you with remorse and longing.
They’d be staying nearby while waiting for the children to recover, and the threat of the parasitic wasps still lingered.
Would you ever be able to forgive them, especially if it meant joining forces and gaining knowledge to protect yourselves in a world that was changing rapidly?
Or would you turn your back on them, just like they had done to you? It was only fair, and how could you trust them when they already betrayed you once?
The choice was yours.
Which ending do y’all want to see first?
—————
SFW TAGLIST: @strawberrypoundtown @avalordream @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @peachesdabunny @misswonderfrojustice @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @mssmil3y @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @zyettemoon1800 @kassandra-hawthorne @vexillum-moeru @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @readeryn68 @danielle143 @omglovelylaila @midromiell @toocollectionchaos-universe-blog @hammerhead96 @bubblez-blop @snugglyshoji @wanderlustingcastaway @amberexe2 @an-ever-angry-bi @rainejiang @lostsomewhereinthegarden @idkccdfnfz @xrenka @arcticat @v3lv3tf0x @ghostiegirl56 @aerangi @kxnnxy @joviaschaoticmind @danielle143 @roxy776699 @katsukis1wife @chaoticevilbakugo @rainejiang @lostsomewhereinthegarden @idkccdfnfz @articat @ghostiegirl56 @aerangi @kxnnxy @roxy776699
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solxamber · 7 months ago
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𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥 𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
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1. Please Let Me Live || Vil Schoenheit
You get isekai'd into the worst novel you've had the misfortune of reading because apparently your life is a cosmic joke. Now all you have to do is not act like the character you've possessed and it'll be fine, you think?
Your fiancé being Vil Schoenheit makes it a little harder to behave like a human being with functional braincells, but hey, atleast he likes you, you think?
2. Villain System vs World || Riddle Rosehearts
You have a guilty pleasure: trashy villainess stories. So when you die a frankly, humiliating death, and end up in one of the worst ones you've had the pleasure of reading as the villainess, you're in denial. Then the villain system shows up. Well, there goes your second chance at life So what do you do now? Do villainous things and cause as much chaos as you can, of course. And maybe, just maybe, bag the male lead, Riddle Rosehearts while you're at it.
3. I'd Rather Date the Male Lead's Dad || Lilia Vanrouge
When you end up in your best friend's favourite but absurd novel about breaking a fae prince's curse as the heroine, you didn't expect to get attached to his little family too. Even more unexpected? You fell for the male lead's dad, but hey it looks like he likes you too.
4. Accidentally Falling for a Fae Prince || Malleus Draconia
When you get dragged into a novel which ends with the heroine in a polycule with the most annoying men in literature, as the heroine herself, you decide that you're gonna skip town. ...Only to trip over the fae prince, Malleus Draconia.
5. Not Another Royal Mess || Azul Ashengrotto
As a proofreader who gets isekai’d into a cringeworthy novel as the villainess, you decide to take revenge on the heroine and male lead for their awful story. With Azul—who just wanted to sell you a magic rock—pulled into your chaos.
6. Love Triangles and Royal Rumbles || Leona Kingscholar
When you get isekai'd as the male lead in the novel where your favorite character, Leona Kingscholar is the second male lead, all that's left to do is rewrite the romance!
7. I Want To Retire! || Idia Shroud
You write a novel that reads like a dumpster fire and while trying to delete the draft, you accidentally get isekai’d into it.
Now, as the villainess, you have to get Idia Shroud on your side as well as survive high society. You have your work cut out for you.
8. Stealing the Plot for Drama || Jamil Viper
The book you've been looking forward to turns out to be a piece of crap, and you have the bad luck of getting pulled into it as the villainess.
So you decide to steal the main character's show, just for sport with the help of your fiancé, Jamil Viper.
9. Falling for the Sun in a Cold Empire || Kalim Al-Asim
You lose everything you've worked for after a freak accident and end up getting transported to the novel that you read when you were a teenager.
As the villainess. It's time to rebuild yourself, one step at a time with a little help from Kalim Al-Asim, your betrothed.
10. My Consort Calls Me Shrimpy || Floyd Leech
You get isekai'd into a novel where the perfect Empress got absolutely wrecked by the plot, and now you have to juggle a bland heroine, 15 weird consorts, a traitor and a delightfully unhinged eel who’s oddly good at solving your problems.
11. Get Me Out of Here || Rook Hunt
You’re isekai’d into a trashy novel and stuck as a tragic side knight character. All you want is survival, but your boss is Rook Hunt—a poetic, eccentric duke.
Now you’re caught in his chaos and, worse, you kinda don’t mind.
12. How to Ruin a Plot || Jade Leech
When you end up as the villainess in a story that's hellbent on making her suffer for no reason, you decide to make the main characters suffer just for catharsis. Good thing that your fiancé, Jade Leech seems to like chaos as much as you.
13. I Want a Refund || Trey Clover
When the universe dunks you into a dumpster fire of a novel as the villainess, survival is key. Except your husband, Trey Clover, turns out to be such a green flag that it gets a little harder to function.
14. I Don't Want the Heroine || Ruggie Bucchi
You get isekai’d into what could only be described as an affront to literature, as the second male lead. So you decide to cut all ties with the heroine and live a peaceful (wealthy) life with your secretary, Ruggie Bucchi. Except life doesn't go as planned as you get more chaos than you signed up for.
15. My Knight is Too Loyal || Sebek Zigvolt
You wake up as the villainess in a novel that had to be written as a joke. The heroine is trying to ruin your life, but if you refuse to acknowledge her, then it’s not happening. Right? …Right??
It doesn't help that your knight, Sebek, is annoyingly endearing.
16. How to Escape a Kingdom || Silver
You get isekai’d as the heroine in a bad novel. The prince is awful. The villainess is worse. The only thing keeping you going is your gorgeous, tired fiancé, Silver.
17. Speedrunning Marriage Fraud || Ace Trappola
You get isekai’d as the heroine in a romance novel, but instead of dreamy suitors, you’re stuck with a yandere cryptid, a billionaire with no impulse control, and a knight who thinks he's in a Shakespearean tragedy (and more).
Your solution? Commit marriage fraud with your best friend, Ace Trappola, and hope no one asks for a marriage certificate.
18. Gaslight, Gatekeep, Get Married || Deuce Spade
You get isekai’d into a garbage novel as the villain, so you take it as a sign that morality is optional now. So, you do what any reasonable person would: you set the world on fire (metaphorically… mostly) and somehow bag your knight, Deuce Spade in the process.
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Masterlist
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paeinovis · 2 years ago
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Fun new game called why am I depressed
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pucksandpower · 9 months ago
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Unfinished Business
Ghost!Charles Leclerc x Reader
Summary: you arrive in Monaco expecting a once-in-a-lifetime vacation and you certainly get one — a fairytale romance with a Monegasque Prince … from the late 19th century
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The gentle hum of a luxury sedan fades as you and your three best friends step out onto the sun-drenched streets of Monaco. The air is thick with anticipation and the salty tang of the Mediterranean. Your eyes widen as they trace the elegant facade of the Palais Grimaldi, its pale stone walls gleaming in the afternoon light.
“I still can’t believe we’re actually here,” Mia breathes, her voice tinged with awe. “An all-expenses-paid trip to Monaco? It feels like a dream.”
You nod, unable to tear your gaze from the intricate architecture. “It’s even more beautiful than the pictures,” you murmur.
Zoe hefts her designer luggage. “Well, ladies, shall we see if the inside is as impressive as the outside?”
As your group approaches the grand entrance, a smartly dressed concierge greets you with a warm smile. “Welcome to the Palais Grimaldi. You must be our contest winners. We’ve been eagerly awaiting your arrival.”
“That’s us!” Olivia chirps, practically bouncing with excitement. “I’m Olivia, and these are Mia, Zoe, and Y/N.”
The concierge, whose name tag reads ‘Philippe,’ bows slightly. “It’s a pleasure to meet you all. If you’ll follow me, I’ll show you to your suite.”
As you trail behind Philippe through opulent hallways adorned with priceless art and glittering chandeliers, you can’t shake the feeling that you’ve stepped into another world — or perhaps another time. The weight of history presses in around you, whispering secrets from centuries past.
“The Palais Grimaldi has quite a storied past,” Philippe explains as he leads you up a sweeping marble staircase. “It’s been home to Monaco’s ruling family for over 700 years.”
“700 years?” You echo, your mind reeling at the concept. “That’s incredible. Has it been a hotel for long?”
Philippe chuckles. “Oh no, mademoiselle. The palace only opened its doors to the public a few years ago. It’s still used for official state functions, but the family decided to share its beauty with the world.”
Mia leans in close, her voice low. “I bet these walls have seen some scandalous things over the centuries.”
“More than you can imagine,” Philippe says with a wink. “If these walls could talk ...”
As you reach the top of the stairs, a long corridor stretches before you, lined with ornate doors. Philippe stops before one and produces an old-fashioned key with a flourish. “Your suite, ladies.”
The door swings open, revealing a space that takes your breath away. Soaring ceilings, silk wallpaper, and antique furnishings create an atmosphere of timeless luxury.
“Holy. Crap.” Zoe’s usual composure cracks as she takes in the opulence. “This is insane.”
Olivia immediately flops onto one of the plush sofas. “I’m never leaving. You’ll have to drag me out kicking and screaming when the week is up.”
You wander to one of the tall windows, mesmerized by the view of the sparkling Mediterranean. “I can’t believe we get to stay here for a whole week.”
Philippe clears his throat. “I’ll leave you to settle in. Your luggage will be brought up shortly. Please don’t hesitate to call if you need anything at all.”
As the door closes behind him, your friends erupt into excited chatter.
“Did you see the size of that bathroom?” Mia gushes. “The tub is practically a swimming pool!”
Zoe is already examining the ornate writing desk. “Look at this. It’s probably worth more than my entire apartment.”
You run your hand along the silk-covered walls, feeling a strange thrill as your fingers trace the intricate patterns. “It’s like stepping back in time,” you murmur.
Olivia bounces on the bed, giggling. “Well, I for one plan to enjoy every modern amenity this place has to offer. Who’s up for raiding the mini bar?”
The rest of the afternoon passes in a whirlwind of unpacking, exploring every nook and cranny of your suite, and planning your itinerary for the week ahead.
As evening falls, you find yourself drawn back to the window. The sun dips below the horizon, painting the sky in vibrant hues of pink and gold. The principality below comes alive with twinkling lights, promising endless possibilities.
“Earth to Y/N!” Mia’s voice breaks through your reverie. “We’re thinking of heading down to the hotel restaurant for dinner. You in?”
You turn from the window, smiling at your friends. “Absolutely. Just let me freshen up a bit.”
In the bathroom, you splash some water on your face and reapply your lipstick. As you study your reflection in the ornate mirror, a strange sensation washes over you — almost as if someone is watching. You shake your head, dismissing the feeling as jetlag-induced imagination.
Rejoining your friends, you make your way down to the restaurant. The maître d’ leads you to a table with a stunning view of the moonlit gardens.
“I propose a toast,” Zoe says, raising her glass of champagne. “To friendship, adventure, and a week we’ll never forget!”
You clink glasses, the bubbles tickling your nose as you sip. As your friends chatter excitedly about their plans for tomorrow, your gaze drifts to the gardens below. For a moment, you could swear you see a figure in old-fashioned dress moving among the hedges. You blink, and the apparition vanishes.
“Y/N? Hello? Anyone home?” Olivia waves her hand in front of your face.
You snap back to attention. “Sorry, what?”
“I was asking what you wanted to do first tomorrow. Beach or shopping?”
You consider for a moment. “Actually, I was thinking about taking a tour of the palace. I’d love to learn more about its history.”
Mia grins. “Ooh, good call. Maybe we’ll run into a handsome prince.”
You laugh, but something in your chest flutters at the thought. “I don’t think that’s very likely.”
As the evening wears on and the wine flows freely, you find your thoughts continually drifting back to the palace and its centuries of secrets. By the time you return to your suite, a pleasant exhaustion has settled over you.
You bid your friends goodnight and curl up in your luxurious bed, the Egyptian cotton sheets cool against your skin. As you drift off to sleep, the last thing you see is the moonlight streaming through the window, casting ethereal shadows on the walls.
In your dreams, you wander the halls of the palace. Everything is hazy, like looking through frosted glass. You turn a corner and come face to face with a young man dressed in 19th-century finery. His eyes, a startling shade of green, seem to pierce right through you.
He opens his mouth as if to speak, but no sound comes out. A profound sadness radiates from him, tugging at your heart. You reach out, wanting to comfort him, but your hand passes through him like smoke.
You jolt awake, heart racing. The room is bathed in the soft glow of pre-dawn light. You sit up, running a hand through your tousled hair.
“What was that?” You whisper to the empty room.
As the sun begins to peek over the horizon, you can’t shake the feeling that your dream was more than just a product of your imagination. Something about this place, about that mysterious figure, calls to you in a way you can’t explain.
You slip out of bed and pad to the window, watching as Monaco comes to life below. Whatever secrets the Palais Grimaldi holds, you’re determined to uncover them. Little do you know, this is just the beginning of an adventure that will change your life forever.
***
The Monégasque sun beats down relentlessly as you and your friends lounge by the hotel’s exclusive rooftop pool. The glittering Mediterranean stretches out before you, a canvas of blue punctuated by gleaming white yachts.
“Now this is what I call a vacation,” Mia sighs contentedly, adjusting her oversized sunglasses.
Zoe nods in agreement, not looking up from her book. “I could get used to this kind of luxury.”
You smile and close your eyes, trying to focus on the warmth of the sun and the gentle lapping of the pool water. But there’s a nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach that you can’t shake off.
Olivia notices your furrowed brow. “Y/N, what’s up? You look like you’re solving world hunger over there.”
You hesitate, unsure how to explain the strange occurrences of the past few days. “It’s nothing, really. I just ... have you guys noticed anything weird happening in the palace?”
Mia perks up, always ready for gossip. “Weird how?”
“Well ...” you start, then falter. How can you describe the way your hairbrush moved across the dresser on its own? Or the whispers you heard in the empty library? “It’s going to sound crazy, but I think there might be something ... supernatural going on.”
There’s a moment of silence before Olivia bursts out laughing. “Supernatural? Come on, Y/N. I know you’ve always been into that ghost hunter stuff, but this is a five-star hotel, not a haunted house.”
Zoe looks up from her book, her expression skeptical. “Are you sure you’re not just jet-lagged? Or maybe it’s all that rich food we’ve been eating.”
You feel a flush creeping up your neck. “I know how it sounds, but I swear, strange things keep happening. Last night, I saw a man’s reflection in the mirror, but when I turned around, no one was there.”
Mia sits up, suddenly interested. “Ooh, was he hot?”
“Mia!” Zoe admonishes, but there’s a hint of amusement in her voice.
You sigh, realizing how ridiculous you must sound. “Never mind. You’re probably right, it’s just my imagination running wild.”
But as the day wears on, you can’t shake the feeling that you’re being watched. Every shadow seems to hold a secret, every creaking floorboard a whispered message.
That night, as your friends snore softly in their beds, you find yourself wide awake, staring at the ornate ceiling. The moonlight filtering through the curtains casts eerie shadows on the walls, and the silence of the night seems to pulse with an otherworldly energy.
Unable to bear it any longer, you slip out of bed and into a robe. Your bare feet are silent on the plush carpet as you make your way to the door. You pause, hand on the doorknob, heart racing. Are you really going to do this?
Taking a deep breath, you step out into the dimly lit hallway. The palace is different at night, the opulence muted, shadows deepening the corners. You walk aimlessly, letting your instincts guide you through the maze-like corridors.
As you round a corner, a chill runs down your spine. At the end of the hallway, you see a figure. It’s only for a split second before it vanishes around the next bend, but you’re certain it was the same man you saw in the mirror.
“Wait!” You call out, breaking into a run. You turn the corner, but the hallway is empty.
Breathing heavily, you lean against the wall. “I’m losing my mind,” you mutter to yourself.
“I can assure you, mademoiselle, that your mind is quite intact.”
You whirl around, heart leaping into your throat. There, standing before you, is the man from your dreams and glimpses.
He’s of average height, with wavy dark hair and piercing green eyes. His clothes are old-fashioned — a tailored suit that wouldn’t look out of place in the late 19th century. But the most shocking thing is that you can see right through him to the painting on the wall behind.
You open your mouth to scream, but no sound comes out. The ghost — because what else could he be — holds up his hands in a placating gesture.
“Please, do not be afraid. I mean you no harm.”
His voice is gentle, with a slight accent you can’t quite place. Despite your terror, you find yourself oddly calmed by his presence.
“Who ... what are you?” You manage to whisper.
The ghost bows slightly. “I am Prince Charles of Monaco, at your service. Or at least, I was Prince Charles. Now, I’m not entirely sure what I am.”
You blink, trying to process this information. “Prince Charles? But that’s impossible. The current Prince of Monaco is Albert.”
Charles smiles sadly. “You are correct. I’m afraid my time as prince was cut rather short. I died in 1894.”
“1894,” you repeat, feeling light-headed. “So you’re ... a ghost?”
“It would appear so, yes.” Charles looks down at his translucent hands. “Though I prefer to think of myself as ... temporarily disembodied.”
Despite the absurdity of the situation, you feel a laugh bubbling up in your chest. “Temporarily disembodied? That’s one way to put it.”
Charles’ eyes crinkle with amusement. “I find a touch of humor helps in most situations, even death.”
You shake your head, still struggling to believe what’s happening. “Why can I see you? Why now?”
“I’m not entirely sure,” Charles admits. “I’ve been bound to this palace since my death, unable to move on. Most of the time, I’m invisible to the living. But occasionally, someone comes along who can perceive me. You, mon chérie, seem to be one of those rare individuals.”
You take a step closer, fascinated despite your lingering fear. “So all those strange things that have been happening ...”
“My apologies,” Charles says, looking sheepish. “I’m afraid I got a bit ... overeager when I realized you could sense me. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“Well, mission not accomplished,” you say dryly. “I’ve been terrified for days.”
Charles’ expression turns contrite. “I am truly sorry. It’s been so long since I’ve been able to interact with anyone. I forgot how alarming it might be.”
You study him closely. Now that the initial shock has worn off, you’re struck by how young he looks — no older than his mid-twenties. And there’s a sadness in his eyes that tugs at your heart.
“How did you die?” You ask softly.
Charles’ face clouds over. “That, I’m afraid, is a rather long and complicated story. One that I’m not entirely sure I understand myself.”
You’re about to press further when a noise down the hallway makes you jump. Charles holds a finger to his lips and gestures for you to follow him. He leads you to a hidden door behind a tapestry, revealing a narrow servants’ staircase.
“Quick, in here,” he whispers.
You hesitate for a moment before ducking into the passageway. Charles follows, closing the door behind you. In the dim light filtering through cracks in the wall, you can barely make out his ghostly form.
“Why are we hiding?” You whisper.
“The night guards,” Charles explains. “They wouldn’t take kindly to a guest wandering the halls at this hour. And I’d rather not have to explain why you’re talking to thin air.”
You nod, seeing the logic. “So ... what now?”
Charles gives you a mischievous smile that makes your heart skip a beat. “Well, since you’re already up and about, how would you like a private tour of the palace? I can show you things no living guide knows about.”
The sensible part of your brain is screaming that this is insane. You should go back to your room, crawl into bed, and pretend this was all a vivid dream. But the adventurous part of you, the part that’s always longed for magic and mystery, is practically buzzing with excitement.
“Lead the way, Your Highness,” you say with a grin.
Charles’ smile widens. “Please, call me Charles. I think we’re a bit beyond titles at this point.”
He starts up the narrow staircase, and you follow close behind. As you climb, Charles begins to speak in a low, melodious voice.
“This palace has been the heart of Monaco for centuries. Every stone, every timber holds a piece of history. There are secret passages like this one crisscrossing the entire building — escape routes, trysting spots for illicit lovers, hiding places for treasures.”
You emerge from the staircase into a small, circular room at the top of one of the palace towers. The view of Monaco at night is breathtaking, the city a glittering jewel box beneath a canopy of stars.
“Oh, wow,” you breathe, moving to the window.
Charles stands beside you, his presence cool but not unpleasant. “Beautiful, isn’t it? Even after all these years, it still takes my breath away. Well, metaphorically speaking.”
You turn to look at him, struck by the wistfulness in his voice. “It must be hard, watching the world change around you while you stay the same.”
Charles nods slowly. “It is ... challenging. But it has its compensations. I’ve witnessed history unfold, seen my beloved Monaco grow and flourish. And occasionally, I get to meet fascinating people like yourself.”
You feel a blush creeping up your cheeks and are grateful for the darkness. “I’m hardly fascinating compared to a ghost prince.”
“I beg to differ,” Charles says softly. “You saw me when no one else could. You followed me up here without hesitation. That takes a special kind of courage and openness to the extraordinary.”
For a moment, you’re lost in his intense gaze. Then you remember that he’s, well, dead, and clear your throat awkwardly. “So, um, what else can you show me?”
Charles seems to shake himself out of a reverie. “Ah, yes. Follow me. There’s so much to see.”
The rest of the night passes in a blur of hidden rooms, secret passages, and Charles’ stories. He tells you about the palace’s construction, about the triumphs and tragedies of the Grimaldi family, about the small, everyday moments that history books never record.
As the sky begins to lighten with the first hints of dawn, you find yourself back in the hallway near your suite. You’re exhausted but exhilarated, your mind whirling with everything you’ve seen and learned.
“I suppose I should let you get some rest,” Charles says, a note of reluctance in his voice.
You stifle a yawn. “I suppose so. My friends will be wondering where I am if I’m not there when they wake up.”
Charles nods, then hesitates. “I ... I hope this won’t be our last conversation. It’s been so long since I’ve had someone to talk to.”
The vulnerability in his voice tugs at your heart. “Of course not. I still have so many questions. Like how you ended up ... you know.”
“Another time,” Charles promises. “For now, sleep well, Y/N.”
As you watch, his form begins to fade. Just before he disappears completely, you could swear you see him wink.
You slip back into your room, your mind racing. As you crawl into bed, you wonder how on earth you’re going to explain any of this to your friends. But one thing’s for certain — your vacation in Monaco just got a whole lot more interesting.
***
The sun dips below the horizon, painting the sky in vibrant hues of orange and pink. You stand on the balcony of your suite, outwardly admiring the view, but your mind is elsewhere. Your friends’ voices drift out from the room behind you.
“Y/N? Y/N!” Mia calls. “Are you coming to dinner or what?”
You turn, plastering on a smile. “Actually, I think I’ll skip it tonight. I’m not feeling very hungry.”
Zoe frowns, concern etching her features. “Are you okay? You’ve been acting strange all week.”
“I’m fine,” you assure her quickly. “Just ... taking in all the history of this place, you know?”
Olivia rolls her eyes good-naturedly. “Only you would come to Monaco and spend all your time geeking out over old buildings instead of hitting the beach.”
You laugh, but it sounds forced even to your own ears. “What can I say? I contain multitudes.”
As your friends file out of the room, Mia lingers behind. “Seriously, Y/N, is everything alright? You know you can talk to us about anything, right?”
For a moment, you’re tempted to spill everything. But how could you possibly explain Charles? “I’m fine, really,” you insist. “Go enjoy dinner. I’ll see you later.”
Once they’re gone, you wait a few minutes to ensure the coast is clear. Then you slip out into the hallway, your heart racing with anticipation.
You make your way to the library, which has become your usual meeting spot. As you enter, you see Charles materializing near the fireplace, a warm smile lighting up his translucent features.
“Good evening, Y/N,” he greets you, his voice as smooth and rich as aged whiskey. “I trust you’re well?”
You can’t help but smile back. “Better now,” you admit, then immediately feel a blush creeping up your cheeks. “I mean, you know, because ... history and stuff.”
Charles chuckles, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “Ah yes, the fascinating history and stuff. Shall we delve into more of it tonight?”
You nod eagerly. “What do you have in store for me this time?”
“I thought we might explore the east wing tonight,” Charles says, moving towards one of the bookshelves. “There’s a passage behind this Voltaire that leads to some rather interesting places.”
As he speaks, Charles reaches for the book, his hand passing right through it. A flicker of frustration crosses his face.
“Allow me,” you say softly, stepping forward to pull the book. The shelf swings open, revealing a narrow passageway.
Charles bows slightly. “After you, mademoiselle.”
You enter the passage, Charles’ cool presence right behind you. As you walk, he begins to speak, his voice low and melodious in the confined space.
“This passage was built during the reign of Prince Charles III — my grandfather,” he explains. “It was meant as an escape route in case of invasion. Monaco’s sovereignty was often threatened in those days.”
“But not anymore?” You ask, ducking under a low-hanging beam.
Charles sighs. “Monaco’s position is more secure now, but it wasn’t always so. In my time, we were constantly navigating a delicate balance between France and Italy, trying to maintain our independence.”
You emerge into a small, octagonal room with windows overlooking the sea. Moonlight streams in, casting everything in a silvery glow.
“This was my private study,” Charles says, a note of wistfulness in his voice. “I spent many hours here, dreaming of what Monaco could become.”
You turn to him, curious. “What kind of dreams?”
Charles’ eyes light up with passion. “I wanted to modernize Monaco, to bring it into the new century. We were so dependent on the casino for revenue — I wanted to diversify our economy, improve education, and implement new technologies.”
“That sounds incredibly progressive for the time,” you say, impressed.
Charles nods. “Some thought too progressive. There were those who resisted change, who wanted to cling to the old ways. But I believed — I still believe — that progress is essential for survival.”
As he speaks, you find yourself drawn in by his enthusiasm, his intelligence. This isn’t just some stuffy old royal — this is a man with vision, with dreams that were cut short far too soon.
“What stopped you?” You ask softly.
Charles’ expression clouds over. “Ah, well, dying tends to put a damper on one’s plans.”
You wince. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”
“No, no,” Charles interrupts gently. “It’s alright. It was a long time ago.”
An awkward silence falls. You move to the window, looking out at the moonlit sea. “It must be hard,” you say eventually. “Watching the world change around you, unable to participate.”
You feel Charles move closer, his presence cool at your side. “It has its challenges,” he admits. “But it also has its joys. I’ve seen Monaco grow and flourish in ways I never could have imagined. And now ...” He trails off.
You turn to look at him. “And now?”
Charles’ gaze is intense, making your heart race. “And now I have the pleasure of sharing it all with you.”
You swallow hard, acutely aware of how close he is, ghost or not. “I ... I’m glad,” you manage to say. “I’ve never met anyone like you, Charles.”
He smiles, a touch of sadness in his eyes. “Nor I you, Y/N. In life or in death.”
The moment stretches between you, charged with unspoken emotions. Then Charles clears his throat (do ghosts need to clear their throats?) and steps back.
“Come,” he says, his tone lighter. “There’s much more to see.”
The rest of the night passes in a whirlwind of secret rooms and hidden treasures. Charles shows you a concealed vault where the crown jewels were once kept, a forgotten ballroom with faded frescoes on the ceiling, even the old dungeons deep beneath the palace.
Throughout it all, Charles regales you with stories — some historical, some personal. You learn about the political intrigues of 19th century Monaco, about Charles’ childhood pranks, about the hopes and fears he had for his country’s future.
As dawn begins to break, you find yourself back in the library, reluctant for the night to end.
“I suppose I should let you get some rest,” Charles says, echoing his words from your first meeting.
You stifle a yawn. “I suppose so. But I don’t want to go.”
Charles’ expression softens. “Nor do I want you to. But your friends will worry if you’re not there when they wake.”
You sigh, knowing he’s right. “Will I see you tomorrow night?”
“I’ll be here,” Charles promises. “I’m not going anywhere, after all.”
As you watch him fade away, you’re struck by a realization that both thrills and terrifies you. You’re falling in love with a ghost.
The next few days pass in a blur. During the day, you go through the motions with your friends, trying to show enthusiasm for the beaches, the shops, the nightlife. But your mind is always elsewhere, counting down the hours until you can see Charles again.
Your friends notice, of course. How could they not?
“Okay, spill,” Mia demands one afternoon as you all lounge by the pool. “Who is he?”
You nearly choke on your drink. “What? Who’s who?”
Olivia rolls her eyes. “The guy you’re obviously sneaking out to meet every night. Don’t think we haven’t noticed you coming back to the room at dawn.”
“I ... I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you stammer.
Zoe puts a hand on your arm. “Y/N, we’re your friends. You can tell us anything. We’re just worried about you.”
You look at their concerned faces and feel a pang of guilt. You hate lying to them, but how can you possibly explain the truth?
“It’s not ... it’s not what you think,” you say finally. “I’ve just been exploring the palace at night. It’s quieter then, easier to imagine what it was like in the past.”
Your friends exchange skeptical looks.
“Right,” Mia says slowly. “And this has nothing to do with the ‘supernatural occurrences’ you were going on about earlier?”
You force a laugh. “Of course not. That was just my imagination running wild. I’ve just been ... really into the history of this place, that’s all.”
Olivia shakes her head. “If you say so. But Y/N, this is supposed to be a fun vacation. Don’t spend the whole time with your nose in a history book, okay?”
You nod, grateful they’re not pushing further. “You’re right. I’ll try to be more present.”
But that night, as your friends sleep, you find yourself slipping out once again, drawn to Charles like a moth to a flame.
He’s waiting for you in the library, a book hovering open in front of him. As you enter, he looks up with a smile that makes your heart flutter.
“Ah, Y/N,” he says warmly. “I was just refreshing my memory on some of Monaco’s more obscure laws. Did you know it’s technically illegal to wear stiletto heels in the palace?”
You laugh, some of the tension from earlier melting away. “Seriously? Why?”
Charles grins. “Apparently, they damage the floors. It was enacted in 1898, four years after my ... departure. I always wonder about the story behind laws like that. What outrageous incident prompted such a specific prohibition?”
You settle into a nearby armchair, tucking your legs underneath you. “Maybe a scorned lover stabbed someone with a stiletto?”
Charles’ eyebrows shoot up. “My, what a violent imagination you have. I was thinking more along the lines of a clumsy debutante wreaking havoc on the ballroom floor.”
“Boring,” you tease. “My version is much more exciting.”
Charles chuckles, the sound warming you from the inside out. “I suppose I can’t argue with that. Your mind is a constant source of fascination to me.”
You feel a blush creeping up your cheeks. “Oh? How so?”
Charles moves closer, his form shimmering slightly in the moonlight streaming through the windows. “You see the world in such a unique way. You’re not bound by the conventions and expectations of my time. It’s ... refreshing.”
“I could say the same about you,” you reply softly. “You’re nothing like I would have expected a 19th-century prince to be.”
Charles’ smile turns wry. “Ah, but I’ve had over a century to adapt and learn. Though I must admit, much of modern life still baffles me. Perhaps you could explain to me the appeal of this ‘Instagram’ your friends keep mentioning?”
You laugh, launching into an explanation of social media that leaves Charles looking both intrigued and mildly horrified. The conversation flows easily from there, jumping from topic to topic with the effortless rhythm you’ve come to cherish in your nightly meetings.
As the hours pass, you find yourself moving closer to Charles, drawn in by his warmth (metaphorical, of course — he’s actually quite cool to be near) and charm. You’re acutely aware of every movement, every fleeting expression that crosses his face.
At one point, Charles reaches out as if to touch your hand, then seems to catch himself, pulling back with a flicker of frustration crossing his features.
“I’m sorry,” he says softly. “Sometimes I forget ...”
You swallow hard, your heart aching. “It’s okay. I ... I wish you could too.”
The words hang in the air between you, heavy with unspoken longing. Charles’ eyes meet yours, and for a moment, the impossibility of your situation crashes over you like a wave.
“Y/N,” Charles begins, his voice rough with emotion. “I-”
But before he can finish, a noise in the hallway makes you both freeze. Footsteps are approaching the library.
“Quick,” Charles whispers urgently. “Hide behind the curtain.”
You scramble to conceal yourself just as the door opens. Through a gap in the heavy fabric, you see a security guard sweep his flashlight around the room.
Your heart pounds in your chest as the beam of light passes inches from your hiding spot. After what feels like an eternity, the guard seems satisfied and leaves, closing the door behind him.
You wait a few more moments before emerging, your legs shaky with leftover adrenaline.
“That was close,” you breathe.
Charles nods, his form flickering with agitation. “Too close. Y/N, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be putting you in these situations. If you were caught ...”
You shake your head vehemently. “No, don’t say that. I don’t care about the risk. Being with you, learning about you and your time — it’s worth it.”
Charles’ expression softens, a mix of affection and sorrow in his eyes. “You’re extraordinary, do you know that? But I fear ... I fear I’m being selfish, keeping you to myself like this.”
You take a step closer to him, wishing more than anything that you could take his hand. “You’re not keeping me anywhere I don’t want to be.”
The words hang between you, charged with meaning. Charles opens his mouth as if to speak, then closes it again, conflict clear on his face.
Finally, he says, “It’s nearly dawn. You should go, before your friends wake.”
You nod reluctantly, knowing he’s right but hating to leave. As you reach the door, you turn back to look at him one last time.
“Charles,” you say softly. “I ... I’ll see you tomorrow night?”
He smiles, but there’s a sadness in it that tugs at your heart. “I’ll be here. I’m always here.”
As you make your way back to your room, your mind is a whirlwind of emotions. You’re falling hard and fast for a man who’s been dead for over a century.
It’s impossible, it’s insane, and yet ... you wouldn’t trade these moments with Charles for anything in the world.
But as you slip back into bed, the first rays of sunlight peeking through the curtains, a nagging doubt creeps in. How long can this go on? What happens when your vacation ends? And most troublingly of all — what aren’t you seeing in your infatuation with this charming ghost prince?
***
The musty scent of old books fills your nostrils as you hunch over a stack of historical tomes in the palace library. Sunlight streams through the tall windows, illuminating dust motes dancing in the air. You’ve been here for hours, your friends long since departed for a day of sunbathing and shopping.
“Find anything interesting?” Charles’ voice makes you jump. You look up to see him materializing near the bookshelf, a curious expression on his translucent face.
You sigh, rubbing your tired eyes. “Nothing concrete yet. There’s frustratingly little information about your death in these official histories. It’s always just ‘Prince Charles died tragically young’ with no details.”
Charles moves closer, peering at the book you’re reading. “Ah, Gustave Saige’s ‘Monaco: Ses Origines et Son Histoire’. A rather dry read, if I recall correctly.”
You can’t help but chuckle. “You’re not wrong. But I thought it might have some clues.” You hesitate, then ask, “Charles, why don’t you just tell me what happened? How you ... died?”
A shadow passes over Charles’ face. “I wish I could. But the truth is, my memories of that time are ... fragmented. I remember tensions rising, arguments with the council, and then ... nothing. Just waking up like this, bound to the palace.”
You reach out instinctively to comfort him, your hand passing through his arm with a chill. “I’m sorry. I can’t imagine how frustrating that must be.”
Charles gives you a sad smile. “It’s been my reality for over a century now. But I must admit, your determination to uncover the truth has given me hope I haven’t felt in a very long time.”
Your heart swells at his words, even as a pang of guilt hits you. Are you really doing this for Charles, or for yourself? The thought of him finding peace and moving on fills you with a complicated mix of emotions you’re not ready to examine too closely.
Pushing those thoughts aside, you turn back to your research. “Well, if these books aren’t giving us answers, maybe we need to look elsewhere. You mentioned arguments with the council. Were there records kept of those meetings?”
Charles’ brow furrows in concentration. “Yes, there would have been. Minutes were always taken. But they would have been considered sensitive documents. Not something you’d find in the public library.”
You lean forward, excitement building. “So where would they be kept?”
“There’s an archive room,” Charles says slowly. “Hidden behind the throne room. It’s where the most confidential state papers were stored.”
You’re already on your feet, shoving books back onto shelves. “Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s go!”
Charles holds up a ghostly hand. “Not so fast, Y/N. That room has been sealed for decades. It’s not somewhere a tourist can just wander into.”
You deflate slightly, but your determination doesn’t waver. “Then we’ll have to find a way in after hours. You can get me there, right?”
Charles looks conflicted. “I could, but Y/N, if you were caught ...”
“I won’t be,” you insist. “Please, Charles. This might be our only chance to find out what really happened to you.”
For a long moment, Charles studies your face. Then he sighs, a sound tinged with both resignation and admiration. “Very well. Meet me here at midnight. I’ll show you the way.”
The hours crawl by as you wait for night to fall. You make a show of going to bed early, claiming a headache to avoid your friends’ plans for a night out. As the clock strikes twelve, you slip out of your room and make your way to the library.
Charles is waiting for you, his form glowing faintly in the moonlight. “Are you sure about this?” He asks one last time.
You nod firmly. “Let’s do it.”
Charles leads you through a maze of corridors and hidden passages. Your heart races with every creak of the floorboards, every shadow that might be a security guard. Finally, you arrive at an ornate door hidden behind a tapestry.
“This is it,” Charles whispers. “The archive room.”
You reach for the handle, but it’s locked. “Damn,” you mutter. “Any ideas?”
Charles frowns, concentrating. “There used to be a spare key ... ah!” He points to a small crevice in the intricate woodwork. “Try there.”
You feel around and, to your amazement, your fingers close around a small key. With trembling hands, you insert it into the lock. It turns with a satisfying click.
The door swings open, revealing a room packed floor to ceiling with shelves of documents. The air is thick with dust and the smell of old paper.
“Where do we even start?” You whisper, overwhelmed by the sheer volume of information.
Charles moves to a section near the back. “The council records from my time should be here. Look for anything dated 1894.”
You begin sifting through stacks of yellowed papers, careful not to damage the fragile documents. Minutes pass in tense silence as you search.
Suddenly, Charles’ voice cuts through the quiet. “Y/N, over here. I think I’ve found something.”
You hurry to his side. He’s pointing at a leather-bound ledger. You carefully open it, coughing slightly at the dust it raises.
As you scan the pages, your eyes widen. “Charles, this ... this is incredible. It’s a record of council meetings leading up to your death. Look at this entry from two weeks before: ‘Prince Charles continues to push for radical reforms. Concerns raised about stability of the principality if plans proceed.’”
Charles leans in, his face a mix of emotions. “I remember that meeting. It was ... heated. Keep reading.”
You flip through more pages, your heart pounding as the story unfolds. “There’s more. ‘Prince’s proposed changes to casino regulations deemed unacceptable. Alternative measures must be considered.’ Charles, this sounds like ...”
“A conspiracy,” Charles finishes, his voice hollow. “They were plotting against me.”
You reach the final entry, dated the day before Charles’ death. Your blood runs cold as you read it aloud. “Situation untenable. Drastic action required to preserve Monaco’s interests. God forgive us.”
A heavy silence falls over the room as the implications sink in. Charles turns away, his form flickering with agitation.
“They killed me,” he says softly. “My own council ... they murdered me to stop my reforms.”
You feel tears pricking at your eyes. “Charles, I’m so sorry. This is ... it’s unthinkable.”
Charles is quiet for a long moment, then turns back to you with a determined expression. “We need to take this ledger. The truth needs to come out, even after all this time.”
You nod, carefully closing the book and tucking it into your bag. As you do, something catches your eye. “Wait, there’s something else here.”
Behind where the ledger was sitting, you spot a small leather pouch. You open it carefully, gasping as several folded papers and a small object fall out.
“What is it?” Charles asks, moving closer.
You unfold one of the papers with trembling hands. “It’s ... it’s a letter. From you.” You begin to read aloud:
“To whoever finds this, I fear my time may be short. I write this in haste, knowing that forces within Monaco seek to silence me. My efforts to modernize our beloved principality and free us from our dependence on gambling have made me enemies in powerful places. If anything should happen to me, know that it was not an accident. The proof of their treachery is contained within these documents and the vial of poison they intend to use. I pray this never sees the light of day, but if it does, may it bring justice and push Monaco towards the future I envisioned.”
You look up at Charles, tears now flowing freely down your cheeks. “You knew. You tried to protect yourself.”
Charles nods slowly, his own eyes shimmering with ghostly tears. “I ... I remember now. I wrote this the night before ... before it happened. I must have hidden it here, hoping someone would find it.”
You carefully gather up the documents and the small vial, adding them to your bag with the ledger. “We have to make this public, Charles. Your murder, the cover-up ... people need to know the truth.”
Charles looks at you with a mix of gratitude and sadness. “You’re right, of course. But Y/N, you must understand what this means. If the truth comes out, if justice is served ...”
“You might be able to move on,” you finish, your voice barely a whisper. The thought sends a dagger through your heart, but you force yourself to continue. “That’s ... that’s a good thing, right? It’s what you’ve been waiting for all this time.”
Charles moves closer, his hand hovering near your cheek as if he could wipe away your tears. “It is. But I find myself reluctant to leave, now that I’ve found something — someone — worth staying for.”
Your breath catches in your throat. “Charles, I ...”
Before you can finish, a noise in the hallway makes you both freeze. Footsteps are approaching.
“Quick,” Charles whispers urgently. “Behind that cabinet.”
You scramble to hide, your heart pounding so loudly you’re sure it must be audible. The door to the archive room creaks open, and a beam of light sweeps across the space.
“Hello?” A gruff voice calls out. “Is someone in here?”
You hold your breath, pressing yourself further into the shadows. After what feels like an eternity, the guard seems satisfied and leaves, closing the door behind him.
You wait a few more moments before emerging from your hiding spot, legs shaky with adrenaline.
“That was too close,” Charles says, his form flickering with agitation. “We need to get you out of here.”
You nod, clutching your bag with its precious cargo close to your chest. “How do we get back?”
Charles leads you to a hidden panel in the wall. “This passage will take you directly to the guest wing. Hurry, before the guard comes back.”
As you step into the secret corridor, you turn back to look at Charles. “What happens now?” You ask softly.
Charles’ expression is a complex mix of emotions — hope, fear, sadness, and something that looks a lot like love. “Now, mon chérie, we bring the truth to light. Whatever comes after ... we’ll face it together.”
You nod, your throat tight with unshed tears. As you make your way back to your room, your mind races with the implications of what you’ve discovered. You’ve found the key to setting Charles free, to bringing him the peace he’s been denied for over a century.
But as you clutch the bag containing the proof of his murder, you can’t help but wonder: at what cost? The thought of losing Charles, of never seeing his smile or hearing his laugh again, fills you with a grief so profound it takes your breath away.
As you slip back into your bed, the first rays of dawn peeking through the curtains, you know that the hardest part of your journey is yet to come. You’ve uncovered the truth, but now you face an impossible choice: keep Charles with you in this half-life or set him free and lose him forever.
***
The golden light of a Monaco sunset streams through the windows of your hotel suite, casting long shadows across the room. You stand before the mirror, adjusting the elaborate 19th-century gown you’ve rented for the evening’s ball. Your fingers tremble slightly as you fasten a delicate necklace, your mind a whirlwind of emotions.
“You look absolutely stunning,” Charles’ voice comes from behind you. You turn to see him materializing near the balcony, his eyes wide with admiration.
“Thank you,” you say softly, your heart aching at the sight of him. “I wish you could really be there tonight, dancing with me.”
Charles moves closer, his form shimmering in the fading sunlight. “As do I, ma chérie. But I’ll be with you in spirit, if you’ll pardon the expression.”
You can’t help but laugh, even as tears prick at your eyes. “Always with the jokes, even now.”
“Well, one must maintain one’s sense of humor, even in the face of ... impending departure,” Charles says, his light tone belied by the sadness in his eyes.
The word hangs heavy between you. Departure. In just two days, you’ll be leaving Monaco, returning to your life back home. The thought fills you with a grief so profound it’s almost physical.
“It doesn’t have to be this way,” you blurt out, the words escaping before you can stop them. “I could stay. I could find a job here, an apartment. We could-”
“Y/N,” Charles interrupts gently, “we’ve discussed this. You can’t put your life on hold for a ghost.”
You turn away, blinking back tears. “But what if I want to? What if being here, with you, is the life I want?”
Charles is quiet for a moment. When he speaks, his voice is thick with emotion. “My dearest Y/N, you cannot imagine how much I wish things could be different. But I am tied to this place, to this half-existence. You have a whole life ahead of you, full of possibilities and adventures. I won’t let you sacrifice that for me.”
You whirl back to face him, frustration bubbling up. “Shouldn’t that be my choice to make?”
“Perhaps,” Charles concedes. “But it is also my choice to refuse to be the anchor that holds you back. You deserve so much more than stolen moments with a specter.”
The truth of his words cuts deep, even as you want to rail against them. You slump onto the edge of the bed, suddenly feeling the weight of your elaborate costume.
“I don’t want to lose you,” you whisper.
Charles moves to sit beside you, the mattress not even dipping under his non-existent weight. “Nor I you. But perhaps ... perhaps this is why we found each other. Not for a lifetime, but for this moment. To bring truth to light, to right an old wrong, and to experience a love that transcends time itself.”
You look up at him, struck by the depth of emotion in his ghostly eyes. “When did you get so wise?”
Charles grins, a hint of his usual mischief returning. “Well, I have had over a century to work on my philosophical musings.”
You can’t help but laugh, even as a tear escapes down your cheek. Charles reaches out, his hand hovering just above your skin in a gesture of comfort.
“Come now,” he says gently. “Let’s not waste our last evening together in sorrow. You have a ball to attend, and I, for one, am eager to see how the modern world interprets the grandeur of my era.”
You nod, standing and giving yourself one last look in the mirror. “You’re right. Let’s make tonight a night to remember.”
As you make your way down to the grand ballroom, you can feel Charles’ presence beside you, a comforting coolness in the warm evening air. The sounds of music and laughter grow louder as you approach.
You pause at the entrance, taking in the transformed space. The ballroom has been decorated to recreate its 19th-century splendor, with crystal chandeliers, elaborate floral arrangements, and guests in period costumes whirling across the dance floor.
“It’s beautiful,” you breathe.
“Indeed,” Charles agrees, his voice tinged with nostalgia. “Though I must say, some of these costumes are rather ... creative interpretations of the fashion of my time.”
You stifle a giggle as you spot a guest in what appears to be a mash-up of Victorian and Edwardian styles. “Well, not everyone can have a ghostly fashion consultant.”
You make your way into the crowd, accepting a glass of champagne from a passing waiter. Your friends spot you and wave enthusiastically.
“Y/N! Over here!” Mia calls out. “You look amazing!”
You join them, smiling as you take in their costumes. “You all look great too. Are you enjoying the ball?”
Zoe nods enthusiastically. “It’s like stepping back in time. Can you imagine living in an era like this?”
You feel Charles’ amusement radiating beside you. “Oh, I don’t know,” you say airily. “I think it might have its charms.”
As the evening progresses, you find yourself swept up in the festivities. You dance with several partners, all the while acutely aware of Charles’ presence, watching from the sidelines.
During a lull in the music, you manage to slip away from the crowd, finding a secluded alcove near one of the large windows.
“Having fun?” Charles asks, materializing beside you.
You nod, a bit breathless from dancing. “It’s wonderful. But I wish ...”
“You wish I could truly be here,” Charles finishes for you. He holds out his hand in an old-fashioned gesture. “Well, my lady, may I have this dance?”
You glance around, making sure no one is watching, then place your hand over his incorporeal one. As the music starts up again, a slow, romantic waltz, you begin to move together.
It’s a strange sensation, dancing with a ghost. You can’t feel Charles’ hand on your waist or his fingers intertwined with yours, but somehow, you move in perfect synchronization. For a few precious moments, it’s as if the rest of the world fades away, leaving just the two of you, swaying to the music.
“I love you,” you whisper, the words slipping out before you can stop them.
Charles’ eyes widen, then soften with an emotion so deep it takes your breath away. “And I love you, Y/N. More than I ever thought possible.”
As you gaze into each other’s eyes, lost in the moment, a sudden chill sweeps through the room. The lights flicker, and a murmur of confusion ripples through the crowd.
Charles stiffens, his form becoming more translucent. “Something’s wrong,” he mutters, looking around warily.
Before you can ask what he means, a commotion breaks out near the center of the ballroom. Guests are backing away from a spot on the dance floor, pointing and gasping in shock.
You push your way through the crowd, Charles right behind you. As you reach the cleared space, your blood runs cold. Three ghostly figures have appeared, dressed in outdated formal wear, their faces contorted with rage and fear.
“Impossible,” Charles breathes beside you. “It’s them. The council members who ... who murdered me.”
As if hearing his words, the three ghosts turn towards you. Their eyes widen in recognition as they spot Charles.
“You!” One of them snarls, his voice echoing unnaturally in the stunned silence of the ballroom. “How are you here?”
Charles steps forward, his own form becoming more visible to the shocked onlookers. “I could ask you the same question, Lord Beaumont. Or should I say, murderer?”
A collective gasp runs through the crowd. Hotel staff are rushing about, trying to maintain order, but everyone’s attention is fixed on the supernatural drama unfolding before them.
“We did what was necessary,” another ghost, a portly man with a walrus mustache, blusters. “You would have ruined Monaco with your radical ideas!”
“Ruined?” Charles’ voice rises in indignation. “I was trying to save our principality, to secure its future beyond the whims of fortune and gambling!”
The third ghost, a thin man with a pinched face, sneers. “And in doing so, you would have destroyed the very thing that made Monaco unique. We couldn’t allow it.”
You find your voice, anger overcoming your fear. “So you murdered him? Your own prince?”
The ghosts turn their baleful gazes on you. “And who are you to question the affairs of state from a century past?” Lord Beaumont demands.
“She,” Charles says, moving to stand beside you, “is the one who uncovered your treachery. The proof of your crimes has been found.”
A murmur runs through the crowd. You see hotel management huddled in a corner, speaking urgently into phones. In the distance, you can hear police sirens approaching.
“It doesn’t matter now,” the portly ghost says dismissively. “We’re long dead, beyond the reach of earthly justice.”
“Perhaps,” you counter, your voice stronger than you feel. “But the truth will be known. History will remember Prince Charles as the visionary he was, and you as the small-minded murderers who cut his life short.”
As you speak, a strange energy begins to build in the room. The three ghosts start to flicker, their forms becoming less substantial.
“What’s happening?” The thin ghost cries out, panic in his voice.
Charles steps forward, his expression a mix of pity and righteousness. “You’re facing judgment at last, gentlemen. Your unfinished business is complete. The truth is out.”
With a howl of despair, the three ghosts begin to fade away. In moments, they’ve vanished completely, leaving behind a stunned silence.
As the implications of what’s just happened sink in, chaos erupts in the ballroom. People are shouting, phones are out recording, and security is trying desperately to maintain order.
But you only have eyes for Charles. His form is starting to shimmer, becoming more translucent by the second.
“Charles,” you gasp, reaching for him. “What’s happening? Are you ...”
He looks down at his fading hands, then back up at you with a sad smile. “It seems my unfinished business is complete as well. The truth is out, justice, in some form, has been served.”
“No,” you whisper, tears streaming down your face. “Please, not yet. I’m not ready to say goodbye.”
Charles moves closer, his hand hovering just above your cheek. “My dearest Y/N, meeting you has been the greatest gift. You’ve brought light to my long darkness, and given me peace I never thought I’d find.”
“I don’t want you to go,” you sob, your heart breaking.
“Nor do I wish to leave you,” Charles says softly. “But perhaps this isn’t truly goodbye. I don’t know what lies beyond, but I do know this — a love like ours transcends time and death itself. Somehow, someway, I believe we’ll find each other again.”
You manage a watery smile. “You promise?”
“I swear it,” Charles vows. He leans in, and for the briefest moment, you swear you can feel the ghost of a kiss on your lips. “Until we meet again, mon amour.”
And with that, Charles fades away completely, leaving behind nothing but a lingering chill in the air and the memory of a love that defied all boundaries.
As the commotion swirls around you, police and hotel management trying to make sense of what’s happened, you stand still in the center of it all. Your heart is breaking, but there’s also a sense of peace, of completion.
You touch your lips, still feeling the echo of that impossible kiss, and whisper to the empty air, “Until we meet again, Charles.”
In that moment, surrounded by the trappings of a bygone era and the chaos of the present, you know that your life has been forever changed. Whatever comes next, you’ll face it with the strength and love Charles gave you, carrying his memory in your heart until, somehow, someway, you find each other once more.
***
The Mediterranean sun bathes Monaco in a warm glow as you climb the steps to the Palais Grimaldi. Five years have passed since that fateful summer, but your heart still quickens as you approach the familiar facade. You adjust the strap of your messenger bag, filled with research materials for your graduate thesis on 19th-century Monégasque politics.
As you enter the palace, now partly converted into a museum, you’re struck by how much has changed. Plaques and displays line the halls, detailing the history of the Grimaldi family. But your eyes are drawn to a new addition: a whole wing dedicated to Prince Charles and his progressive vision for Monaco.
You pause before a large portrait of Charles, your breath catching in your throat. The artist has captured his piercing green eyes perfectly, that hint of mischief in his smile that you remember so well.
“It’s remarkable, isn’t it?” A voice beside you says, startling you from your reverie. “How much history these walls have seen.”
You turn, a polite response on your lips, but the words die in your throat. Standing next to you is a young man who could be Charles’ twin. The same wavy dark hair, the same chiseled jawline, and most strikingly, those same intense green eyes.
For a moment, you forget how to breathe. “Charles?” You whisper, hardly daring to believe it.
The young man looks at you curiously, a small smile playing on his lips. “Well, yes, but I’m afraid you have me at a disadvantage. Have we met before?”
You blink rapidly, reality reasserting itself. Of course this isn’t your Charles. It can’t be. You clear your throat, feeling a blush creep up your cheeks. “I’m so sorry, you just ... you look remarkably like someone I used to know. I’m Y/N.”
The young man’s smile widens, and he holds out his hand. “Charles Leclerc. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Y/N.”
You shake his hand, trying to ignore the jolt of electricity that runs through you at his touch. “Leclerc? As in the Formula 1 driver?”
Charles nods, looking slightly sheepish. “The very same. Though today I’m just a tourist like anyone else, enjoying a bit of home between races.”
“Home?” You ask, intrigued despite yourself.
“Born and raised in Monaco,” Charles explains. “Though I admit, I haven’t spent as much time in the palace as I perhaps should have. It’s quite fascinating, especially this new exhibit.”
You nod, turning back to the portrait of Prince Charles. “It really is. The prince was quite a remarkable figure. His ideas were so ahead of their time.”
Charles steps closer, studying the portrait. “You seem to know a lot about him. Are you a historian?”
“A graduate student,” you explain. “I’m here on a research grant, studying 19th-century Monégasque politics at the International University of Monaco.”
Charles’ eyes light up with interest. “Really? That sounds fascinating. I’ve always been interested in history, especially the history of Monaco. It’s a small place, but it’s played such an outsized role in European affairs.”
You can’t help but smile at his enthusiasm. “It really has. Prince Charles, in particular, had some revolutionary ideas about diversifying Monaco’s economy beyond just gambling. If he hadn’t died so young, who knows how things might have turned out?”
A shadow passes over Charles’ face. “Yes, his death was quite tragic. And mysterious, from what I understand. Wasn’t there some recent discovery about the circumstances?”
You nod, your heart racing as you remember that night five years ago. “Yes, documents were found that suggested he was actually assassinated by members of his own council who opposed his reforms.”
Charles shakes his head, looking troubled. “How terrible. To be betrayed by those closest to you, all for wanting to make positive changes.”
“It was a different time,” you say softly. “Change is always frightening to those in power.”
Charles nods thoughtfully. “True, but it’s also necessary for growth. Monaco has come a long way since then, but I sometimes wonder if we couldn’t be doing more to realize Prince Charles’ vision.”
You look at him in surprise. “That’s ... that’s exactly what I’ve been thinking in my research. The prince had ideas about sustainable development and diversifying the economy that are still relevant today.”
Charles grins, and for a moment, the resemblance to your Charles is so strong it takes your breath away. “Great minds think alike, it seems. You know, I’ve been looking for ways to use my platform as an athlete to promote positive change in Monaco. Perhaps we could compare notes sometime?”
Your heart skips a beat. “I’d like that,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady. “I’m always happy to discuss history with someone who’s genuinely interested.”
“Excellent,” Charles says, pulling out his phone. “Why don’t we exchange numbers? We could meet for coffee and continue this conversation.”
As you input your number into his phone, you can’t help but notice a small charm dangling from it — a miniature racing helmet. “That’s cute,” you comment.
Charles looks at it and chuckles. “Ah, yes. It was a gift from my mother. She says it’s for luck, but I think she just worries about me on the track.”
The casual mention of his mother sends a pang through your heart. This Charles is very much alive, with a family and a life of his own. You have to remind yourself that he’s not the same person you knew, no matter how similar he might seem.
“Well, it seems to be working,” you say lightly. “You’ve had quite a successful season so far. Won your home race, if I’m not mistaken.”
Charles looks pleased. “You follow Formula 1?”
You shake your head. “Not really, but it’s hard to miss the news when you’re living in Monaco. The Grand Prix is quite an event.”
“That it is,” Charles agrees. “You know, if you’re interested, I could give you a behind-the-scenes tour of the circuit sometime. It’s quite fascinating from a historical perspective as well. The race has been run on essentially the same streets since 1929.”
You can’t help but laugh. “Are you always this charming with strangers you meet in museums?”
Charles grins, a mischievous glint in his eye that’s achingly familiar. “Only the ones who can discuss 19th-century political reform with such passion.”
You feel a blush creeping up your cheeks. “Well, in that case, how can I refuse? A tour sounds lovely.”
As you continue to chat, moving through the exhibit, you’re struck by how easy it is to talk to Charles. He’s knowledgeable and curious, asking insightful questions about your research and offering his own perspectives on Monaco’s history and future.
At one point, you pause before a display showcasing some of Prince Charles’ personal effects. Among them is a small, ornate pocket watch.
“Beautiful craftsmanship,” Charles comments, leaning in for a closer look.
You nod, a lump forming in your throat as you remember your Charles checking a similar watch during your midnight explorations. “It’s a shame it’s not working anymore.”
Charles tilts his head, studying the watch intently. “Actually, I think it is. Look closely at the second hand.”
You peer into the display case, and to your amazement, you see the tiny hand ticking away steadily. “You’re right! How did you notice that?”
Charles shrugs, looking slightly embarrassed. “I’ve always had a thing for timepieces. Comes with the racing territory, I suppose. Hundreths of a second are everything on the track.”
You shake your head in wonder. “You’re full of surprises, aren’t you?”
“I try to keep things interesting,” Charles says with a wink. Then his expression turns more serious. “You know, it’s strange. Being here, learning about Prince Charles ... I feel an odd connection to him. Almost as if I knew him somehow.”
Your heart races at his words. Could it be possible? You push the thought away, reminding yourself that such things only happen in fairy tales. “Well, he is your ancestor, in a way. All Monégasques are connected to the Grimaldi family, aren’t they?”
Charles nods slowly. “True, but this feels different. When I look at his portrait, it’s almost like looking in a mirror. And his ideas, his passion for progress ... it resonates with me in a way I can’t quite explain.”
You swallow hard, trying to keep your voice steady. “Maybe some things are just meant to be. Some connections transcend time.”
Charles looks at you intently, and for a moment, you swear you see a flicker of recognition in his eyes. “Perhaps you’re right. It’s a comforting thought, isn’t it? That the past isn’t really gone, just ... waiting to be rediscovered.”
You’re saved from having to respond by the chiming of the palace clock, signaling the approach of closing time.
“Oh, I didn’t realize it was so late,” you say, glancing at your watch. “I should probably get going. I have a meeting with my advisor in the morning.”
Charles nods, looking slightly disappointed. “Of course. But we’re still on for that coffee and circuit tour, right?”
You smile, feeling a warmth spreading through your chest. “Absolutely. I’m looking forward to it.”
As you gather your things and prepare to leave, Charles touches your arm lightly. “Y/N, I know this might sound strange, but ... I feel like we were meant to meet today. Like some force in the universe brought us together.”
You look into his eyes, so familiar and yet new, and feel a spark of hope ignite in your heart. “I know exactly what you mean.”
He smiles, and in that moment, you see not just the Charles of the present, but echoes of the Charles you knew and loved. “Until we meet again, then?”
The phrase, so similar to your Charles’ last words, sends a shiver down your spine. “Until then,” you agree softly.
As you walk out of the palace and into the warm Monaco evening, your mind is whirling. You can’t shake the feeling that something extraordinary has happened, that a promise made long ago is somehow being fulfilled.
You pause at the top of the steps, looking back at the palace that has played such a pivotal role in your life. As the setting sun gilds the stone facade, you allow yourself to imagine, just for a moment, that maybe, just maybe, some loves really are strong enough to transcend time and death itself.
With a smile on your face and hope in your heart, you descend the steps, ready to embrace whatever new adventure awaits. After all, in a world where ghosts can fall in love and centuries-old mysteries can be solved, anything seems possible.
And, as the promise of a new beginning beckons, you can’t help but feel that the best chapters of your story are yet to be written.
***
The sun-drenched streets of Monaco buzz with excitement as Sofia, a die-hard Scuderia Ferrari fan, makes her way towards the Palais Grimaldi. Her red Ferrari cap and matching team shirt make her stand out among the tourists, but she doesn’t mind. She’s here on a mission: to soak up every bit of Monaco’s rich racing history.
As Sofia enters the palace-turned-museum, her eyes widen in awe at the opulent surroundings. “Wow,” she breathes, spinning slowly to take it all in. “Talk about living like royalty.”
She wanders through the exhibits, pausing occasionally to read plaques or admire artifacts. But her mind keeps drifting to thoughts of sleek racing cars and the roar of engines. That is, until she rounds a corner and comes face to face with a large portrait that stops her in her tracks.
“No way,” Sofia mutters, stepping closer to the painting. Her brow furrows as she studies the face of the young prince depicted. “That’s ... that’s impossible.”
Just then, a tour group passes by, led by an enthusiastic guide. Sofia catches snippets of the commentary.
“... Prince Charles, one of Monaco’s most progressive rulers ...”
“... tragically died young under mysterious circumstances ...”
“... recent discoveries suggest he may have been assassinated ...”
Sofia’s head is spinning. She pulls out her phone, quickly pulling up a photo of Charles Leclerc, her favorite driver. She holds it up next to the portrait, her jaw dropping at the uncanny resemblance.
“Excuse me,” she says, tapping the tour guide on the shoulder. “This Prince Charles, when exactly did he live?”
The guide smiles, always happy to share historical tidbits. “Prince Charles ruled briefly in the late 19th century. He died in 1894 at the young age of 26.”
Sofia’s mind races. “And has anyone ever noticed how much he looks like Charles Leclerc? The F1 driver?”
The guide’s eyes twinkle with amusement. “Ah, you’re not the first to notice that similarity. It’s become quite a popular topic of discussion lately. Some even joke that Leclerc is the prince reincarnated.”
Sofia laughs nervously. “Right, of course. Just a coincidence, I’m sure.”
As the tour moves on, Sofia remains rooted to the spot, her eyes darting between her phone and the portrait. It’s more than just a passing resemblance. The shape of the eyes, the curve of the jaw, even the hint of a mischievous smile — it’s all pure Leclerc.
Lost in thought, she doesn’t notice someone approaching until a voice beside her says, “Fascinating portrait, isn’t it?”
Sofia jumps, turning to see a young woman standing next to her. The newcomer is dressed casually in a flowing sundress, a messenger bag slung over her shoulder.
“Oh, um, yes,” Sofia stammers. “It’s quite ... striking.”
The woman smiles knowingly. “Let me guess. You couldn’t help but notice the resemblance to a certain Formula 1 driver?”
Sofia’s eyes widen. “You see it too? I thought I was going crazy!”
The woman laughs, a warm, genuine sound. “Trust me, you’re not crazy. I’m Y/N, by the way. I’m doing some research here for my graduate thesis.”
“Sofia,” she replies, shaking your hand. “So, what’s the deal? Is Leclerc secretly a time-traveling prince or something?”
You chuckle, but there’s a strange look in your eyes that Sofia can’t quite decipher. “I’m afraid the explanation is probably much more mundane. Many Monégasques have some connection to the Grimaldi family. It’s likely just a case of strong genes persisting through the generations.”
Sofia nods, but she’s not entirely convinced. There’s something about the way you’re looking at the portrait, a mix of fondness and melancholy, that piques her curiosity.
“You seem to know a lot about this,” Sofia probes gently. “Are you a big history buff?”
You smile, turning away from the portrait. “You could say that. I’ve been studying Prince Charles and his era for my thesis. It’s a fascinating period in Monaco’s history.”
Sofia’s about to ask more when she notices someone approaching over your shoulder. Her eyes go wide, and she has to stifle a gasp.
You turn to see what’s caught her attention, and your face lights up. “Charles! I didn’t expect to see you here today.”
Sofia’s jaw drops as Charles Leclerc himself joins you, greeting you with a warm smile and a kiss on the cheek. He’s dressed casually in jeans and an oversized hoodie, a baseball cap pulled low over his eyes, but there’s no mistaking that face — especially not when it’s right next to the portrait of his doppelganger.
“I had some free time between meetings and thought I’d stop by,” Charles explains. “How’s the research going?”
You launch into an explanation of your latest findings, and Sofia watches in fascination as Charles listens intently, asking insightful questions and offering his own thoughts. It’s clear this is far from the first time they’ve discussed the topic.
Finally, Charles seems to notice Sofia’s presence. “Oh, I’m sorry, how rude of me. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
Sofia manages to close her mouth, which had been hanging open in shock. “No, no, it’s fine. I’m Sofia. I’m a huge fan, Mr. Leclerc.”
Charles grins, shaking her hand. “Please, call me Charles. Always nice to meet a tifosa.”
Sofia gestures weakly to the portrait. “I was just ... I mean ... has anyone ever told you that you look exactly like ...”
Charles and you exchange a look that Sofia can’t quite interpret. Then Charles turns back to her with a wry smile. “Once or twice, yes. It’s quite the coincidence, isn’t it?”
Sofia nods, still feeling like she’s stepped into some kind of twilight zone. “Coincidence. Right.”
You clear your throat, seemingly eager to change the subject. “So, Sofia, are you here on vacation?”
Grateful for the change of topic, Sofia launches into an enthusiastic description of her plans for the next week. As they chat, she can’t help but notice the way Charles and you interact — the casual touches, the inside jokes, the way your eyes continually find each other. There’s clearly a deep connection there.
At one point, Charles excuses himself to take a phone call. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Sofia turns to you with wide eyes. “Okay, you have to tell me. What’s the real story here? How long have you two been together?”
You laugh, a slight blush coloring your cheeks. “Is it that obvious? We’ve been seeing each other for a few months now. We met right here, actually, in front of this very portrait.”
Sofia’s romantic heart melts a little at that. “That’s so sweet! But come on, you have to admit, the resemblance is freaky. And the way you two were talking about history ... it’s like he lived it or something.”
You get that strange look in your eyes again, a mix of secrecy and wonder. “Charles has always had a deep connection to Monaco’s past. It’s one of the things that drew us together.”
Sofia’s about to press for more details when Charles returns, slipping his arm around your waist with casual familiarity.
“I hate to cut this short,” he says apologetically, “but I’ve got to run to a sponsor meeting. Y/N, we’re still on for dinner tonight?”
You nod, smiling up at him. “Wouldn’t miss it. I’ll see you at eight.”
As Charles says his goodbyes and leaves, Sofia watches him go with a mix of admiration and lingering confusion. She turns back to you, determined to get to the bottom of this mystery.
“Okay, I know this is going to sound crazy,” Sofia starts, lowering her voice conspiratorially, “but is there any chance ... I mean, has anyone ever considered the possibility that Charles might be, I don’t know, the reincarnation of Prince Charles or something?”
You pause for a long moment, and Sofia holds her breath, half-expecting you to laugh in her face. But instead, you give her a small, enigmatic smile.
“The universe works in mysterious ways,” you say softly. “Sometimes, the past has a way of coming back to us in forms we least expect. Who’s to say what’s possible and what isn’t?”
Sofia’s mind reels at the implications. “So you’re saying ...”
You hold up a hand, your expression turning more serious. “I’m not saying anything definitively. But I will say this: getting to know Charles — the Charles of today — has been like rediscovering a part of history I thought was lost forever. Whether that’s due to reincarnation, cosmic coincidence, or just the magic of human connection, I can’t say for sure. But I do know that it feels like a second chance at something extraordinary.”
Sofia listens, enthralled. It’s like something out of a movie or a romance novel. “That’s ... wow. I don’t even know what to say.”
You laugh, the sound tinged with wonder. “Trust me, I know the feeling. Life has a way of surprising you when you least expect it.”
As you chat a bit more, Sofia can’t help but feel like she’s been let in on some grand secret. The way you talk about Charles, about history, about the strange twists of fate — it’s all so fantastical and yet, standing here in the shadow of that eerily familiar portrait, she can’t quite bring herself to disbelieve it entirely.
Finally, you glance at your watch and sigh. “I should get going. I’ve got to prepare for dinner soon. It was lovely meeting you, Sofia.”
Sofia nods, still feeling slightly dazed. “You too. And ... thanks. For sharing all of that. It’s given me a lot to think about.”
You smile warmly. “Just keep an open mind. You never know what kind of magic you might encounter, especially in a place like Monaco.”
As you leave, Sofia turns back to the portrait of Prince Charles. She studies it intently, trying to reconcile the historical figure with the modern-day race driver she admires so much.
“Second chances,” she murmurs to herself. “Who’d have thought?”
With one last look at the portrait, Sofia continues her tour of the museum. But now, every artifact seems to pulse with new significance. The weight of history feels more present than ever, intertwining with the present in ways she never could have imagined.
As she steps out of the museum and into the bright Monaco sunshine, Sofia finds herself looking at the city with new eyes. The sleek modern buildings and ancient narrow streets no longer seem at odds, but part of a continuous, living history.
She thinks of Charles Leclerc, of the mysterious Y/N, of a long-dead prince whose legacy seems to echo through time. And as she makes her way towards the harbor, where she knows the Monaco circuit snakes through the city streets, Sofia can’t help but feel that she’s stumbled upon a story far greater and more magical than any single victory.
With a smile on her face and a newfound appreciation for the mysteries of the universe, Sofia sets off to explore more of Monaco. After all, in a place where princes can become race drivers and love can transcend time itself, who knows what other wonders she might discover?
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ho2k-com · 11 months ago
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catt-nuevenor · 5 months ago
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A Brief Guide on Uploading ChoiceScript Demos to Itch.io
Since Dashingdon is shutting down, and there will be a lot of folks wanting to host their ChoiceScript demos elsewhere, I thought it'd be a good idea to provide a brief guide on how to do so for itch.io.
This is for Windows in the folder actions, but it shouldn't be too difficult for folks to translate for Mac. This also assumes you haven't changed any of the files within your game folder other than those found under 'scenes'.
Within your game folder, locate the 'web' subfolder, right click it and select 'Send to' then 'Compressed (zipped) folder. Name your newly compressed file something sensible, and I recommend moving it to a new folder outside of your game files, just to keep everything neat and tidy.
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2. Assuming you already have an itch.io account, navigate to your dashboard, and click the 'Create New Project' button.
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3. Name your project as you like, and under 'Kind of project', select the 'HTML' option.
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4. Set the 'Pricing' to 'No Payments', you cannot use ChoiceScript for profit unless it is with the Choice of Games or Hosted Games publishing labels. No one wants to get in trouble unnecessarily here.
5. In the Uploads section, upload your newly zipped file we made in step one. After it's finished uploading, you'll be given one drop down and two tick boxes. You need to tick the 'This file will be played in the browser' option.
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6. I've found so far that 'Viewport dimensions' work quite well for desktop at 1080 x 640. Either use these numbers or experiment and find what works best for you.
7. You must tick the 'Enable scrollbars' option for your game to display properly, otherwise options, text and buttons can be clipped off the bottom of the viewport.
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8. Continue filling out the rest of the form, or skip it for now and scroll all the way to the bottom to the 'Visibility & access' section. Here make sure you have 'Draft' selected. This prevents others from finding your game until you're ready, and I always recommend play testing things before you make your work public.
9. Finally, hit the 'Save' button, then go and have a look at your creation by hitting the 'View page' link. And there you go! When you're ready for public release, just change the option in section 8 to 'Public'.
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A few things to bear in mind about hosting on itch.io:
There isn't currently any way for your readers to save their game. I'm sure someone could write in a plugin similar to Dashingdon's at some point, but as for right now, this isn't available. See addition/edit below.
Make sure you properly tag your game with the 'choicescript' and 'interactive-fiction' tags. There are an awful lot of games on itch.io and it's easy to get lost in the crowd. Make sure folks can find you by having the right tags.
I hope this brief guide was useful to folks.
Best of luck to you with your writing!
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Addition/Edit:
Thanks to @hpowellsmith for bringing this to my attention. You can add save functionality to your game by using this addon:
The ChoiceScript Save Plugin
Just tried it out on my own game and it works perfectly.
Rather than run through the addon author's own tutorial here, I'll just forward you to the Readme on their Github page.
One small note I would add is when it asks you to make the two small additions to your index file, make sure you right click the file and open it with your coding program, don't double-click it as this will just open it in an internet browser, and it won't give you the access to what you need to change.
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ghostedbyalex · 25 days ago
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don’t go, not tonight - agatha harkness x reader
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summary: Christmas Eve. A snowstorm. You weren’t expecting to spend the night with your ex-wife… but here she is — as infuriating, charming, and impossible to ignore as ever. Some things never change. Some… never really ended. | words: 5k (apprx)
warnings: Heavy tension; exes with unresolved feelings; suggestive smut (non-explicit); intimacy; passive-aggressive bickering; divorce angst; modern no powers AU; minor language; mutual pining.
main masterlist | marvel masterlist | part two
-x-
You weren’t expecting the doorbell.
Not tonight. Not with the snow coming down in heavy, lazy flakes and the street already covered in a quiet white blanket. William had texted barely an hour ago—just got to Teddy’s! they have hot chocolate AND matching pajamas lol—and you'd smiled, actually smiled, for what felt like the first time all week.
Everything was supposed to be settled. Calm. Predictable.
So when you open the door and see her, your entire body tightens.
“Agatha?”
She blinks at you, startled—though not as startled as you are. Her hair is slightly damp from the snow, dark curls tucked beneath a beret that would’ve looked ridiculous on anyone else. She’s wearing that navy coat you used to steal in the mornings when she left too early for work. Her cheeks are pink, eyes tired, and still, somehow, she smirks.
“Evening,” she says, like this is normal. Like she didn’t just explode your entire evening with one unexpected visit. “You’re looking very... festive.”
Your sweater has reindeer on it. You resist the urge to fold your arms across your chest.
“What are you doing here?” you ask. “William’s not home.”
Agatha falters. “He’s not?”
You stare at her. “Are you serious?”
She sighs, brushing snow from her shoulder with exaggerated delicacy. “I thought—he was spending Christmas with me and New Year’s with you.”
“That was the original plan,” you say, voice tightening. “Then you said you’d be working straight through the holiday, and we all agreed he’d spend Christmas with Teddy’s family. You agreed. Weeks ago.”
She blinks, processing. “Oh.”
“Oh,” you echo, full of bite.
Agatha shifts on her feet, suddenly looking very human and a little embarrassed. “Things have been insane at the firm. I must’ve... missed that.”
“Missed the texts or missed being a functioning adult?”
That earns you a sharp look—but no retort. She exhales, watching her breath fog up in front of her like even that is trying to avoid confrontation.
You should close the door. You should let her freeze in her own mess for once.
But the snow’s getting heavier, and there’s something in her eyes—soft, worn-down, real—that knocks against your ribs. You hated loving her. But you loved her hard. That kind of thing doesn’t vanish just because it hurts.
“Come in,” you say, against better judgment. “You can dry off. Then leave.”
Her smirk returns—smaller this time, but real. “How generous.”
You step aside. “Don’t push it.”
Agatha walks in, trailing cold air and old memories behind her. You close the door, and suddenly the quiet of Christmas Eve feels a lot less peaceful.
The living room smells faintly of cinnamon and clean laundry. The heater hums softly. And yet, with Agatha standing in the middle of it all, snow melting onto the hardwood, you feel like you’ve stepped into enemy territory.
Or worse—familiar territory.
She slips off her coat like she still owns the space, drapes it over the arm of the couch, and makes a slow circuit toward the fireplace, touching things she shouldn’t: a framed photo of William and Teddy at the pumpkin patch, a half-burned candle, the throw blanket you always kept folded a certain way.
“You rearranged the furniture,” she notes casually, then glances back at you. “I liked the couch by the window.”
You resist the urge to roll your eyes. “The draft was awful.”
Agatha hums. “Right. I forgot how sensitive you are.”
You cross your arms, half for warmth, half to stop yourself from doing something dramatic. “Do you want tea or something?”
“I’ll take coffee, if you’ve got it. Decaf.”
You raise an eyebrow. “Since when do you drink decaf?”
“Since my heart started racing every time I opened a work email,” she says, deadpan.
You snort—despite yourself—and head into the kitchen. From there, you can still hear her footsteps, the way they hesitate near the bookshelf, pause near the pile of opened mail on the dining table.
“You’ve been working,” she calls out, like it’s a revelation.
You glance at your laptop, still open on the kitchen counter, the blinking cursor accusing you silently from the half-finished paragraph.
“I have a deadline,” you reply, a little too quickly. “I’m submitting an article for the Review before the end of the break.”
“Of course you are.”
You glance back through the doorway and find her leaning against the frame like she belongs there. Like this is just a regular night in a life you don’t share anymore.
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
She shrugs, smile lazy. “Just ironic. You used to lecture me about knowing when to disconnect.”
“That’s different,” you snap. “I never let work ruin my personal life.”
Agatha’s eyebrows lift, just slightly. “Mm.”
You turn back to the coffee, pressing the machine button harder than necessary. The silence she leaves in her wake is the kind that says everything.
When you finally hand her the mug, she takes it with a soft thank you and walks straight to the couch. Sits down. Crosses her legs. Just like she used to, as if the cushion remembers her weight.
You hover near the kitchen, unsure if sitting feels like surrender.
“You always kept this place so... warm,” she says after a sip. “Cozy. It still smells like you.”
You ignore the way your pulse stutters.
“You said it smelled like vanilla and unresolved expectations,” you remind her.
Her smile deepens. “Well. I wasn’t wrong.”
You bite the inside of your cheek. “Is this going somewhere?”
Agatha shrugs again, sipping her coffee, eyes fixed on the twinkling lights wrapped around the staircase bannister.
“Not really,” she murmurs. “Just... nice to be somewhere that feels real. Even if I don’t belong here anymore.”
You don’t answer.
Because if you do, the words might come out wrong.
Or worse—true.
You clear your throat, eyes on your half-finished document, not on the woman comfortably curled on your couch like she’s just visiting an old friend instead of an ex-wife - that still turns your stomach inside out with every sigh.
“You’re welcome to stay a bit,” you say, keeping your tone neutral. “Warm up. Wait out the snow.”
Agatha looks up, surprised, but not enough to hide it well. She gives a slight nod, as if you’d offered her a blanket instead of unspoken hospitality. “Thanks.”
You sit back at your desk in the corner, trying to will your focus back into place. The blinking cursor stares at you like a dare. Your fingers hover above the keyboard, then slowly begin to type. One sentence. Two. Delete. Rewrite.
Agatha settles into scrolling her phone, the sound of occasional taps and soft chuckles drifting across the room. Time slips strangely. Maybe an hour. Maybe two. The snow outside grows thicker, heavy flakes blanketing the windowsills and erasing the world beyond the glass.
You shift in your chair, trying to stretch your spine without groaning aloud. Your neck twinges—sharp from the awkward angle, the hours of tension hunched over a screen. You wince and roll your shoulders.
And then she’s behind you.
Before you can react, her hands are there—firm and warm, sliding over your upper back, her thumbs pressing gently into the knots beneath your shoulder blades. It’s muscle memory. Her touch. The way she used to wordlessly soothe you when words failed.
“Jesus—” you start to say, but it melts into a soft sound—something embarrassingly close to a moan as your head tips forward under the instinctive relief.
Agatha chuckles behind you. “Still got it.”
You freeze.
And suddenly, you’re too aware of everything—the heat of her palms, the way her fingertips lingered just a beat too long, the way your body reacted without your permission.
You jerk up from the chair, heart hammering, and put a few feet of distance between you and her.
Agatha lifts both hands in a lazy peace offering. “Hey—relax. It’s just a massage.”
You glare, pulse still racing. “You don’t get to just do that anymore.”
Her smile falters for the first time. “Right,” she says quietly. “Sorry. Habit.”
You don’t answer. You can’t. You’re too busy trying to ignore the tremble in your fingers and the fact that for one stupid moment, you forgot why she doesn’t live here anymore.
You cross to the window, arms tightly folded, desperate for an anchor. But all you see is a wall of white swallowing the street whole.
“It’s worse,” you mutter.
“What?”
“The snow. It’s coming down harder now. You’re not driving in this.”
Agatha joins you at the window, gaze tracking the same invisible path that you once drove together, late-night fast food runs and whispered arguments in the front seat.
“Huh,” she says. “Looks like I’ll be here a while.”
You don’t look at her. You just breathe.
Of course she will.
And of course part of you already knew.
The storm doesn’t let up.
You check the forecast once, then again. Then once more just to make sure you’re not losing your mind. But the warnings are all the same: Hazardous conditions. Stay indoors. Avoid unnecessary travel.
You resist the urge to scream into your mug.
Agatha has made herself at home again—not in the obvious ways, but in the small, treacherous ones. She lingers near you when she doesn’t have to. Her fingers brush yours when she reaches for the wine glasses. Her hip grazes your back as she squeezes past you in the narrow kitchen, even though there’s plenty of room. And every time you tense, she just smiles. That maddening, amused little smirk like she knows exactly what she’s doing.
She helps herself to your cabinets. Picks a record that she bought two years ago and plays it like it still belongs to her. The soft hum of jazz fills the room like warm smoke, and it’s not even ten minutes before you realize you’ve stopped typing entirely.
When you glance at her, she’s leaning against the kitchen counter, glass of red wine in hand, watching you over the rim with eyes that know you too well.
“This used to be your focus face,” she says. “The squint. The lip thing.”
You immediately stop doing the lip thing.
“I have a working face,” you reply, reaching for your tea instead of wine. “Not that you’d know. You barely let me finish a sentence without distracting me.”
Agatha laughs, low and knowing. “Well. Some of us are naturally distracting.”
You almost choked on your tea.
“God, seriously?” you say, setting the mug down hard enough to clink against the counter. “Are you always like this, or did you get worse after the divorce?”
“Depends,” she says, wandering closer again. “Am I getting to you?”
You stare at her, and the worst part is—she knows the answer before you can deny it.
Dinner is a reluctant truce. You throw together something simple—pasta and a jarred sauce—and Agatha insists on helping. Only, helping apparently means standing too close, bumping your arm with hers, brushing flour from your cheek like she still has that right.
She hums softly to herself while stirring, barefoot now, sleeves rolled, like this is just one more quiet night in your kitchen.
You grit your teeth and keep cooking. But your body betrays you—warming in ways it shouldn't, breath catching in your throat every time her skin finds yours, even by accident.
And by the time the dishes are done and the house has gone still again, you’re genuinely considering walking outside barefoot just to cool off.
The record has long stopped playing. The wine bottle is mostly empty. The windows are frosted over, and the heater kicks on again with a low sigh.
You sit on the edge of the couch, one knee bouncing, trying not to look at her.
Agatha stretches, then leans back into the cushions with a soft groan. “So. You gonna offer me the couch, or do I sleep in the bathtub?”
You exhale slowly. “You know the couch kills your back.”
She grins. “So generous tonight.”
“It’s not for you,” you snap. “It’s for my conscience.”
Her smile softens just enough to hurt. “Right.”
You don’t move right away. But eventually, you stand, rubbing the back of your neck, still sore from earlier. Still remembering her hands.
“The guest room’s made up,” you say, refusing to meet her eyes. “You’ll be here through Christmas at this rate.”
Agatha stands slowly, brushing past you again with that same unbearable calm, that same quiet weight. “Merry Christmas, darling,” she murmurs as she passes.
You flinch at the endearment—and at the way your traitorous body responds to it like a match to dry wood.
You don’t look back until she’s gone down the hallway, the door clicking softly behind her.
The house feels too warm. The storm rages outside. And all you can think about is how you let her in again.
Literally. Emotionally. Too far.
Steam curls in the bathroom mirror as you splash cold water on your face, trying to scrub off not just the exhaustion, but the heat clinging to your skin ever since she stepped through the door.
You don't hear her come in—but then again, you never really had to hear Agatha. She moves like memory: always present, always near, even when she shouldn’t be.
She slips in beside you like it's the most natural thing in the world, toothbrush already in hand. You catch her reflection just as she opens the drawer—her drawer—and pulls out a familiar travel-sized toothpaste. The kind only she ever used.
You freeze, water still dripping from your chin.
She notices your silence, glances over, then lowers the toothbrush slightly.
“What?” she says, too casually. “You kept this drawer.”
You say nothing.
Agatha shrugs, smiling to herself as she uncaps the tube. “Guess some habits die harder than others.”
The laugh she lets out is soft and low, almost fond—but it lands wrong in the narrow space between you.
Your stomach tightens.
You reach for the towel, pat your face dry, and without a word, you step out. Away from the heat. Away from her.
She calls your name, but you don’t stop until you’re in the hallway, heart pounding too loud in your ears. You’re halfway to your room when you hear her footsteps behind you, slower now. Less sure.
Agatha stops just outside your doorway.
You turn to face her before she can speak.
“What is this?” you ask, voice tired and flat and utterly done. “Seriously. What are you doing here, Agatha?”
Her brows lift, but there’s a flicker of guilt in her eyes. She opens her mouth—but all that comes out is a vague, “It’s snowing.”
You laugh, bitter and thin.
“Don’t,” you say. “Don’t insult me like that. I’m tired. It’s Christmas. Just—if you’re going to lie, at least make it worth the effort.”
Silence stretches long between you.
Agatha’s gaze drops for a beat. When she looks back up, some of that charm, that effortless confidence, has cracked around the edges.
She breathes in slowly through her nose, then lets it out.
“I knew William wasn’t here,” she says.
The words hang in the air, fragile and too loud.
“I saw the messages. Or… some of them. I got the gist. He was spending Christmas with Teddy. And I knew you’d be here. Alone.”
You stare at her, stunned. “You knew?”
Agatha nods, no smile this time. No smirk. Just the truth.
“I didn’t want to spend the night in my apartment. I didn’t want to be surrounded by silence and regret and ghosts of Christmases we didn’t survive. And I guess… I was hoping maybe you wouldn’t want that either.” She folds her arms, her voice quieter now. “So yeah. I came here on purpose. Not just because of the snow. Not just because I missed a few messages. I came because—” she hesitates, then finishes with a whisper, “—I didn’t want to be without you tonight.”
You blink once. Twice.
Your pulse hammers like it did hours ago. But this time, it’s not from lust. Not even anger.
It’s something deeper. Something raw and aching.
She stands there, waiting, like she’s bracing herself for the cold after stepping out into the storm.
You let the silence stretch just a second too long.
Then something in you snaps.
“Of course you didn’t want to be alone,” you say, your voice rising sharp and cold. “You never did. That was always the problem, wasn’t it? You hated being alone, but you also hated showing up. For me. For us.”
Agatha flinches, but you’re already moving, pacing a slow circle around the edge of your own anger, too far in to stop now.
“You chose work. Every damn time, you chose work. Missed school meetings, missed dinners, missed me. And every time I brought it up, you smiled like it was nothing. Like I was overreacting.”
“I was trying to build something for us,” she snaps back, finally. “I didn’t want you to have to worry about anything—”
“You didn’t want to worry.” You jab your finger toward her. “So you just vanished into your office with your shiny projects and your perfect assistant.”
Her jaw tightens. “Oh, God, not this again.”
“Yes. This. Again.” You laugh, harsh and hollow. “I know what I saw, Agatha. I know how you looked at her when you thought I wasn’t watching.”
“Nothing happened with Rio.”
“Maybe not physically,” you spit. “But I was already sleeping alone in our bed most nights. What difference would one more betrayal make?”
Agatha looks like she wants to argue—but she doesn’t.
You shake your head, your voice cracking just slightly. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”
You turn to leave. To close the door and let this conversation die like everything else between you.
But her voice stops you:
“Don’t lie to me,” she says, quietly. Intense.
You turn slowly.
Her eyes are locked on yours, something molten burning just beneath the surface.
“There’s still something here,” she says. “Don’t pretend there isn’t. I see the way you look at me. I feel it every time I get too close.”
She steps forward, slow but certain. “You never stopped being mine.”
You should move. Should shout. Should slam the door in her face.
But you don’t.
You just stand there, frozen, as she closes the distance between you.
Her hand lifts, fingertips ghosting up your arm—soft, reverent, dangerous. Your breath stutters.
“You want to fight?” she whispers. “Fine. But don’t stand there pretending this isn’t still real.”
Her mouth is inches from yours. Her presence swallows the space, pulls you under like a tide.
And damn it all—she’s right.
You’re tired. You’re hurt. You hate her for all the ways she let you down.
But your body remembers her.
Your heart, traitorous thing that it is, still reaches.
So when she kisses you, you don’t stop her.
You fall into her like muscle memory—like a habit you never broke.
And when her hands tangle in your hair, and her lips press against your throat, and the wall finds your back with a thud—you don’t fight it.
You let yourself burn.
Even if it leaves nothing but ashes by morning.
You barely register the way her hands frame your face, the way her thumb brushes just below your bottom lip. You're too busy trying to breathe.
Because she knows exactly what she's doing.
Agatha never needed time to build momentum—never cared for ceremony or slow-burning build-ups. She always struck like lightning: sudden, intense, unavoidable. And it’s no different now.
One second, you're still leaning against the wall, dazed and uncertain.
The next, her mouth is back on yours, and her body presses flush to yours, no hesitation, no asking. Just claiming.
You gasp into her kiss, and she swallows the sound like it belongs to her.
And maybe it does.
Her hands slide down your sides, firm and familiar, skimming the curve of your waist like she’s reminding herself you're still real. That you're not just a memory she’s conjured up in some late-night fantasy.
You clutch at her shoulders, but it's not resistance. Not really. It’s grounding. It’s instinct. It's need.
She groans softly against your mouth, like the taste of you still drives her mad.
"God, I missed this," she murmurs, lips brushing your jaw, your throat, the place just behind your ear that makes you shiver. "Missed you."
Your head falls back against the wall, traitorously exposing more skin, giving her more room. You feel like you're unraveling beneath her touch, like every nerve in your body remembers this rhythm, this pressure, this woman.
She guides you back a step—then another—until your bedroom door is nudged open by the weight of your bodies.
But she doesn’t drag you in.
She holds you right there, half in the hallway, half in the dark warmth of the room you used to share. Like even gravity doesn’t quite know where to place you now.
You feel her fingers trace the hem of your shirt, tugging slightly, not asking permission but not quite pushing it either.
“I know every part of you,” she whispers against your throat. “Still dream about them all.”
You grip her wrist.
“Agatha,” you breathe, and there's warning in your voice.
But there’s also longing.
She lifts her head, eyes locking with yours.
There’s no triumph in her gaze. No smugness. Just something raw and unguarded.
“I just want to feel close to you again,” she says. “Even if it’s just tonight.”
You close your eyes.
Because you shouldn’t let her.
Because you know how this ends.
But her hands are warm, her lips are softer than you remember, and your body… your body stopped pretending hours ago.
So you pull her in.
Not gently.
Not carefully.
Just desperately.
Like you’re drowning and she’s the only breath left in the world.
Your shirt is gone before you realize it.
Not torn, not rushed—just removed, like second nature, like her hands were made for this, for you. Her fingers skim along your spine, a touch so precise it feels designed. You’re not sure if you're trembling from cold or heat, but she holds you like she's memorizing the shape of every breath.
Agatha’s mouth finds the hollow of your collarbone, and something inside you breaks. Not loudly. Not violently. Just the soft, clean snap of surrender.
You tug her coat off her shoulders, feel the silk of her blouse beneath your fingertips. The smell of her perfume hits you all at once—familiar, warm, almost cruel in how much it still makes your stomach twist.
She presses you down to the bed like you’ve never been anywhere else.
Like this is gravity.
And it is.
She moves over you with purpose, with rhythm, with knowledge—touching the places she once claimed with confidence, now with hunger. There’s reverence in her hands, but also possession. Like she's remembering and rediscovering you all at once.
And you let her.
You arch into her like you’re offering yourself up, but it’s not submission. It’s muscle memory. It’s everything your body never unlearned.
Her name escapes your lips more than once. Sometimes breathless. Sometimes a warning. Sometimes a plea.
She responds to each like a prayer.
There’s nothing frantic in it—just heat, deep and slow and unbearable in its intensity. The kind of intimacy that leaves you shaking not from what’s being done, but how it’s being done.
She whispers things against your skin. Half apologies. Half confessions. None of them clear. All of them felt.
And when it’s over—when the storm inside you has quieted and your heartbeat has finally begun to settle—you realize you’re still tangled in her arms, legs looped together, her hand resting just above your heart like it belongs there.
You should pull away.
You should turn your back and put a wall between you like you've done every night since the divorce.
But her lips are at your temple now.
And her fingers are still tracing slow circles into your ribs.
And against all better judgment, you stay exactly where you are.
The room is dim, wrapped in the hush of snowfall and the soft creak of bedsprings beneath shared weight.
Your breathing is still uneven. Hers, steadier, almost smug. She's always been like that—composed after chaos, a storm in human form who never seemed to feel the damage she left behind.
You feel her shift beside you, one thigh still pressed between yours, her skin warm and slick where it touches yours. Her fingers are splayed lazily over your hip, thumb stroking back and forth in a slow, thoughtless rhythm that makes your spine arch just enough to betray you.
She leans in, her lips grazing your ear.
“You still make the sweetest sounds,” she whispers, voice thick with satisfaction and something softer beneath it. “I missed hearing them.”
You swallow hard, eyes fixed on the ceiling. You should tell her to stop. That this doesn’t mean anything. That it was just sex.
But her touch lingers—deliberate.
She dips her head to press a kiss just beneath your jaw, then lower, to the hollow of your throat, her tongue warm against cooling skin. You feel her smile against you.
“You didn’t even hesitate,” she murmurs. “The moment I touched you in that hallway…”
You turn your face away, cheeks burning, but she follows you, nuzzling closer.
“You still want me,” she says, not asking. Stating. Certain.
You hate that she’s right.
Her hand moves—up, over your ribs, across the curve of your breast. Her thumb circles the peak with maddening slowness, enough to make your body stir again despite everything.
“Agatha…” you whisper, but it’s not a protest. Not really.
She hums, low and pleased, her mouth trailing down your chest. The scrape of her teeth over sensitive skin makes you gasp, and when her thigh shifts just slightly between yours, you feel your entire body light up with need again.
“I shouldn’t still know you this well,” she says, half against your breast, voice shaking just a little. “But I do.”
Your fingers grip the sheets. You want to push her away. You want to pull her closer.
You settle for threading your hand into her hair.
“I thought about this every night,” she confesses. “About touching you like this. Hearing you fall apart under me. Wondering if I ruined everything beyond repair.”
You bite your lip, and then, softer than you mean to, “Maybe you did.”
Agatha stills.
The silence is sharp.
But you don’t let go of her.
You feel her breath at your ribs, shaky now. Not from desire, but from something like regret.
“I didn’t want it to end like that,” she says.
And for the first time, there’s no seduction in her voice.
Just sorrow.
You close your eyes.
“I didn’t want it to end at all,” you admit.
She rises slowly, leans over you, her face just inches from yours again. Her eyes are searching now, not hungry—haunted.
There’s so much you could say. So much that would hurt to hear.
But instead, you lift your hand to her cheek.
Just once.
And she leans into the touch like she’s starving for it.
You kiss her this time.
Slowly.
Not like earlier—when it was raw and desperate and filled with everything unsaid. This kiss is quieter. Softer. The kind you used to share in the middle of the night, tangled in sheets and half-asleep, just to remind yourselves you were still there. Still together.
Agatha melts into it with a quiet sound in the back of her throat. Her hands return to your body, reverent this time, like she’s not trying to ignite you—just remember you. Every inch. Every curve. Every place she used to know by heart.
You roll with her, bodies aligning instinctively. Your thigh between hers, your mouths parting to breathe the same air. It’s almost painful how familiar it feels.
She looks up at you like she can’t quite believe you’re real.
“I missed you,” she whispers, like it hurts to admit.
Your hands slide down her arms, over the lines of muscle and softness, until your fingers are laced with hers, pressed into the mattress.
“I know,” you whisper back, voice trembling. “I missed you too.”
Your hips move together, slow, steady, drawn by memory and need. There’s no rush—just the rhythm of old lovers rediscovering the language only their bodies speak. Her breath stutters against your skin with every motion, every brush of your chest against hers, every press of your hips that makes her fingers clutch tighter around yours.
She murmurs your name like a prayer, your real name—not the clipped version she used when you were fighting. Not the bitter one she spit out when you signed the papers. This is the version only she used when you were happy.
You bury your face in her neck, lips pressed to her pulse. Her skin tastes like perfume and sweat and something you still recognize as home.
When her body tightens beneath you, trembling and arching, she gasps your name like it’s the only thing anchoring her. You follow moments later, breath catching, forehead resting against hers, both of you shaking.
She wraps her arms around you before you even think to move. Holds you there. Doesn’t let go.
“Don’t go,” she breathes against your temple. “Please. Not tonight.”
You feel her heart pounding against yours, wild and afraid.
“I wasn’t planning to,” you murmur, and her arms tighten, like she doesn’t believe you.
You shift slightly, just enough to press a kiss to her shoulder, to the edge of her collarbone, where you used to rest your head on lazy Sunday mornings.
She pulls the blanket over you both with one arm, never breaking contact.
And slowly—gradually—your breathing finds hers.
Outside, the snow keeps falling, burying the world in white and silence.
But inside, everything is warm.
Her skin against yours.
Her fingers threaded through yours under the covers.
Her heartbeat still echoing between your ribs like it belongs there.
And somewhere between the hush of the storm and the weight of her body curled around you, sleep finds you both. Not with finality.
But with the softness of something still possible.
Of something not quite over after all.
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elisabeth-maddison-piastri · 2 months ago
Text
Everyone Loves Her
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Oscar adjusted the collar of his team shirt as he walked through the bustling paddock, the hot sun gleaming on the freshly polished cars lined up in the garages. His mind was already halfway into race prep mode, strategies and lap times buzzing in the back of his head. But beside him, walking in heels that probably cost more than his entire wardrobe combined, was his twin sister—Yn.
Yn wasn’t just visiting. No, she was making an entrance.
Oscar had barely announced her arrival before the entire paddock seemed to stop functioning for a moment. Engineers paused mid-briefing. Team members subtly elbowed each other. Cameras that were supposed to be focused on the drivers were now subtly tracking Yn as she gracefully strode through the area in a chic, flowy jumpsuit in a soft champagne tone, hair curled to perfection, oversized sunglasses perched on her nose.
Mark, trailing just behind them, leaned in toward Oscar and muttered under his breath, “Well. This’ll be fun.”
Oscar glanced at him, frowning. “Why do I feel like something bad is about to happen?”
Mark just clapped him on the shoulder sympathetically.
The moment they stepped fully into the McLaren hospitality area, the drivers descended like bees to honey.
“Is that her?” Lando was the first to spot her, nearly choking on his smoothie.
“Yn?” Charles looked up from his phone, eyes going wide. “Oscar’s sister? That Yn?”
“The Vogue one?” Pierre added, already adjusting his shirt and casually tousling his hair.
Oscar blinked, watching the group of grown men suddenly abandon whatever they were doing to make a beeline for them. Yn, of course, noticed immediately.
“Oh no,” he mumbled.
Yn took off her sunglasses slowly, revealing big, sparkling eyes framed by long lashes and perfectly done makeup. She smiled. “Hey boys.”
And that was it. Game over.
Lando nearly tripped over his own feet. “Wow. I mean—hi. Hello. Yn, right? I’ve heard so much about you.”
She tilted her head, pretending to think. “Lando, right? I read about you in that GQ spread last month. Nice suit. Didn’t love the shoes, though.”
Lando flushed pink, half-embarrassed and half-thrilled. “Noted. You can help me pick next time?”
“Oh absolutely not,” Oscar muttered.
Max appeared next, as smooth as ever. “Yn, I’m surprised you didn’t come earlier. Oscar’s been hiding you.”
“Protecting,” Oscar corrected grumpily.
Yn ignored her brother and extended a perfectly manicured hand to Max. “Well, I’ve been very busy. Fashion week in Milan, meetings in Paris, you know the drill.”
“Sounds exhausting,” Max said, taking her hand and kissing it lightly. “But you make it look effortless.”
“Ugh,” Oscar groaned.
Charles was next, stepping up with that soft Monaco-boy charm of his. “Bonjour, Yn. You are even more beautiful than I imagined. Do you speak French?”
“Un peu,” she said, grinning. “But I prefer the way you say my name in that accent.”
Pierre nearly tripped beside him.
Lewis arrived with all the grace of a king. “Darling, you are absolutely glowing,” he said smoothly, pulling her into a gentle hug. “Welcome to the chaos.”
“Oh, finally. A gentleman,” Yn teased, sending the others a smug little look.
“Excuse me?” Carlos said, raising his eyebrows. “I haven’t even had a chance yet.”
He stepped forward, took her hand, and pressed a soft kiss to her cheek. “You must be the most stylish person here.”
“Obviously,” Yn quipped, winking.
“Yn!” Alex waved, already grinning. “Oscar’s told me literally nothing about you. Which is honestly suspicious, because I feel like we would get along.”
“We might,” Yn replied, giving him a once-over. “You're charming. Dangerous combination.”
George arrived, tall and proper, but clearly flustered. “Hello, Yn. Very pleased to meet you. You look… well, breathtaking.”
“Aw, that’s sweet,” Yn said. “I like your watch. Vintage?”
“Gift from Carmen,” he said, smiling sheepishly.
“A man who wears sentimental accessories. Cute,” she said with a little nod.
And then Fernando, smooth as ever, took both of her hands and kissed each one. “Yn. Welcome to Formula 1. You have completely changed the mood of the entire paddock. For the better.”
Yn laughed, clearly enjoying the attention. “I didn’t realize I’d be this popular.”
Meanwhile, Oscar stood rooted to the spot, mouth half-open. “What is happening.”
Mark handed him a bottle of water like he was a war veteran returning from the front. “They’re all in love with your sister.”
“This is a nightmare,” Oscar said.
“It’s your fault. You never told them she was this stunning,” Mark said, amused.
Just then, Oscar spotted Yuki—Yuki, the man who never flirted with anyone—sitting with Yn on a bench and… feeding her sushi.
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Yn beamed as Yuki held out a piece of salmon nigiri with his chopsticks. “Open,” he said, eyes wide and adoring.
“Oh my god,” Oscar muttered, watching as Yn happily accepted the bite, touching Yuki’s hand with a soft smile.
Around them, the rest of the drivers were hovering like adoring fans at a concert. Lewis was leaning in to fix a strand of her hair. Charles and Max were bickering in the background over who spotted her first. Pierre was whispering something that made her laugh, and George was awkwardly trying to get a selfie.
Yn turned to Oscar and said brightly, “I love it here. Can we do this every weekend?”
Oscar opened his mouth to say something—probably a firm “no”—but Lando interrupted him.
“Yn, want to come check out the McLaren motorhome? I’ve got a playlist I think you’ll like.”
Charles jumped in. “But first, Yn, let me show you the new Ferrari livery. I swear it matches your vibe perfectly.”
Lewis added, “You could give us fashion tips for our next campaign shoot.”
Pierre dramatically clutched his heart. “Or just stay here and bless us with your presence.”
“She’s not staying!” Oscar finally burst out. “She’s not your fairy godmother!”
“Actually,” Yn mused, sipping the iced tea someone (probably George) had handed her, “I might be.”
Mark nearly choked laughing.
Yuki popped another sushi roll into her mouth. “I think she should stay.”
Oscar just groaned and dropped his head into his hands. “I should’ve left her in Paris.”
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eviiesstuff · 5 months ago
Text
"You say it's big, but you take it."
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Hi loves, this is my first time properly writing one of these, so feedback is totally welcomed. I take requests if you have anything specific for the next one, and it would be appreciated so I have more inspo on what to write, so feel free to leave one. Hope you enjoy! :)
!Minors DNI!! 18+ mature content!
Your new partner Joel is all you could possibly want and more. But he becomes even more to you when you see what he hasn't shown you yet.
Warnings;
(ingestion of alcohol, swearing, sexual/dirty talk, smut, fingering, p in v sex, unprotected sex)
(No Outbreak Joel, Sarah is not present in this scenario)
The smell of fresh air compared to the sweaty and sticky air in the club was almost god-given as you stepped outside, a cold breeze fluttering against you, cooling the damp and hot skin.
Time had flown by, and 2am had approached. You weren't the type to abandon your friends, but after they became too drunk to function and nearly threw their own guts up on your shoes, you simply called them an uber hoping at least one of them were sober enough to direct the group into the car. You watched as they drunkenly piled into the car, babbling on that they would pay you for the ride. They weren't going to be anytime soon.
You sighed, watching the Uber pull away into the road and disappearing down the street. You would've gladly hopped in if there was room, but unfortunately not.
"fuck," you cursed quietly.
Home was nearly half an hour away, and by the god awful feeling of the ache in your heels. It was clear that the walk back was not happening, and neither was the 175 dollars you would have to pay for an Uber home as it was so late. Your fingers worried over the hem of your dress, thinking of a solution to your current lack of transport.
Joel.
Was it too late to call? 2am might be a stretch for him. Your thumb hovered over his contact on the phone screen after you entered the phone app, but you clicked on it anyway, not like you had any other choice at this point. The trill of the calling sound had happened many times, and hope was slowly easing away after each ring came and went.
"Hello?" His voice sounded somehow lower than usual, seemingly full of fatigue. A sense of relief came over you as his voice filled your ear. "Hey, I didn't wake you, did I?" You answered with an edge of worry to your voice.
"s' all good sweetheart, what's wrong?" he replied, his choice of gentle tone putting you at ease. You paused, biting down harshly at the skin of your lip. "I know it's late, but I'm kinda stuck outside the bar with no way to get home.."
"Y' need me to come n get you?" he practically finished for you, "Yeah basically," you offered.
A soft grunt came from his end of the line, like he was getting out of bed. "Send me your location, I'll come n get you," he said after a short moment. A smile spread to your lips. "Thanks," you whispered.
"You got it baby," he replied before the call was abruptly ended. You finished messaging him with your location before you clicked the phone off. Minutes passed, the ache of your feet grew in your heels, as well as the shiver from the briskly chilled air. It didn't take longer than 15 minutes to pass before you recognised a certain shined navy pick-up beginning to slow down as it advanced towards the side walk outside the bar.
You slowly walked over as it came to a stop, watching as Joel leaned over the centre console to open the passenger door before you got there, to which you happily slid into the leather seat, taking in the heat of the car gratefully. "Late night?" he asked with a smidge of amusement at your look of slightly drunken drowsiness. "Clearly," you muttered, leaning your head back against the leather rest behind you, eager to feel the relief of sitting in a warm space. You heard him huff a laugh, "alright just askin' " he protested. A hand came to your dress covered thigh, though you could still feel the heat from Joel's skin over the fabric. Watching his strong hand softly squeeze the flesh there, fingers flexing and moulding around the skin, the veins present on the back of his hand bulging more than usual. The feeling and the sight makes something stir quietly inside of you.
His grip doesn't waver when the truck pulls away from its parking space. "Yours or mine?" You hear him ask in a murmur.
"Yours."
The car ride can't seem to get any faster, as if it wants you to feel even more tortured. Joel's hand hasn't left its place since it got there, fingers grazing slightly higher, bringing the hem of your dress with it, causing the skin of your upper thigh to appear. His thumb dares to push its way between your inner thigh, dragging it in a sweeping motion against the skin absentmindedly. Your eyes flicker to him, gazing at his stern side profile as he drives, staring at the curve of his nose, and the sharpness to his stubble covered jaw, which clenches every now and again.
His thumb trails between your two legs, rubbing at the skin on the inside of your thigh, and you dare to squeeze the both of them together. It's as if he doesn't notice, or he simply isn't fazed when you do. His hand annoyingly doesn't move any further, and disappointment clouds your mind. Its as if he knows your thinking about it, can't help not teasing you in the process. He side eyes you, noticing your defeated expression, and the corner of his lip tugs upwards into a subtle side smirk, turning back to the view of the road.
You thank the Lord as his driveway and house come into view, and he pulls up infront of the garage. You breathe a sigh of relief as he retreats to get out the truck. However you immediately miss the warm feeling of his hand on your skin. The passenger door opens, and his hand is on you again, placing itself on the small of your back to guide you up the driveway. "Thanks for pickin me up," you whispered against his firm shoulder, resting your cheek against the soft sleeve of the t shirt he sported. His lips came to your temple, and you closed your eyes, feeling the sensation of him pressing a chaste kiss against it. "No problem baby," he replied, the soft vibration of his drawl in your ear making you nearly shiver.
The scent of wood faintly fills your nose once the both of you step inside, and you take notice of the crackling flames inside the Woodburner pride of place against the wall of the living room. Joel's house always felt comfortable, the man loved his wood burning.
You shrug off your jacket, and it's placed on the sofas arm. "Y' have a good time?". Joel is buisied in the kitchen, pouring an amber liquid into a thick glass. "Yeah," you replied slightly dazed. You simply watched, shamlessly staring at his back which looked as broad and imposing as ever, the rolled sleeves of his shirt struggling to hold in the muscle beneath, the skin slightly bulging out of the hem.
Everything about him was just so big. You'd thought a shameful amount of times about how big he could be elsewhere, but those thoughts had been passed to the back of your mind. Sure, you and Joel had fooled around, but it was early days in what you had going on. You were yet to discover other things about him, that you wished you knew, you really wished you knew.
After finishing the alcohol in a matter of seconds, he turned away from the counter, and you averted your eyes from his muscles. Your head gradually tilted upwards as he came nearer. Soon enough his hands braced at your waist, sliding one to your back as his eyes fell to your face. "Y' wanna go to bed?" he murmured, his eyes flickering all over your features.
You were tired, sure. But not tired enough. "Not yet," you replied, curling your hands around the fabric of his shirt, subtly tugging down to ask him to lean down. He caught on, pressing his forehead against yours, before he dipped down and his mouth pressed to yours. The kiss lasted for a gracious moment, his hands roaming and grabbing at any bare skin he could get. You felt his tash graze on your upper lip, but you didn't care, you had much bigger things swirling around in your mind.
His lips broke from yours, and you took a breath of air alongside him. He noticed your look, eyes silently begging for something he hadn't caught on to, lips slightly swelled and parted for more, so much more.
His finger trailed across your jaw, upwards to your lips, smoothing his thumb across the softness of them. "What t'is it baby?" He drawled.
"Joel," you whispered, instinctively leaning into the touch of his fingers, as you looked up to him. "Mm?"
"Y'need to tell me, or I can't help you sweetheart,"
"N' that's what I wanna do," he added.
You hesitated, taking in the gentle expression he held, his eyes boring into yours fiercely.
"I want..I want to do more," you responded, "More than what we've been doing,"
He hums in response, dragging his thumb into your hairline, pushing the baby hairs that fought against the style you'd done, carding his fingers through the strands. His eyes are thoughtfull as always, staring down at you deeply. "Yeah? that's it?" he asks, to which you nod a little to fast.
His gaze travels across the expanse of your face, neck, and the beginning of your collar bone. "So fuckin' beautiful, so perfect," His lips brush against your jaw, placing short yet purposeful kisses that continue down your neck, feeling the damp spots appear on your skin. You sigh at the sensation. He eventually captures your lips again, pulling you into a kiss that begins painfully slow, but he wastes no time, gently gripping the back of your head to apply even more pressure to the kiss, his lips slotting and moulding against yours, tongue sliding against them, and you let him in with greatfullness.
The feeling of his tongue breaching your mouth, eagerly licking into it makes you moan softly, slipping your fingers into his hair, dragging them through the locks ontop of his head, pulling delicately at the roots to which he grunted. Your tongue joining the kiss as it clashed and swirled against his hungrily, lips becoming slightly sore from the sheer pressure of the action, yet it felt awfully good. "I'll give you everythin baby, everythin you want," he whispered between breaks, the both of you gasping for air against the heat of the kiss, your body desperately pressing against the firmness of his chest, his sturdy arms caging you in in response.
His hand moved to the zipper of your dress, breaking from the kiss momentarily to give you a look of ask. "Please," you urged, pressing your hips firmly against his as even more of a 'yes'. He groaned softly, eyebrows creasing at the action. He pulled at the zipper, sliding it down enough so he could push the straps of your dress down, whilst hiding his face in your neck as he slathered kisses all over your skin. "Oh-" you gasped, inhaling sharply as he slid the top of your dress from its place exposing the lace of your bra. The sight making him sigh once he lifted his face from your neck, eyes travelling hungrily over your breasts covered by the bra.
His arousal deepened, and you felt it clearly through his jeans, gasping softly at the feeling of his hardness against your clothed cunt. It simply made you want more faster. "Joel-" you urged. "I know baby," he replied, still marvelling at the sight of your breasts before him. "Joel- let's go to bed," you encouraged, to which he pressed another kiss to your lips, and again. "The bed can wait," he retorted, hands bracing at your hips, acting as a guide to push you to the couch, looking up once you hit the couch, watching him stare you down, a stare that caused fluttering throughout your body, warmth growing rapidly in your stomach. Not a moment later he's caging you in, arms either side of your head as you fumble with the buttons of his shirt, kissing his lips sloppily as you go.
Your no longer drunk only on alcohol, but on Joel. His smell of the masculine cologne that emitted from his neck. His large hands gripping at your flesh, broad shoulders crowding your whole self. it was all too much and not enough all at once. You unbuttoned his shirt keenly, sliding it down his shoulders to expose the tanned skin of his bare torso, your eyes flickering down to the prominent v line that disappeared underneath his jeans, which had become significantly tighter. You almost moaned at the sight of him half bare, trailing your hands along his smooth skin, feeling the toughened and firm muscle under your fingers. "Joel," you uttered, grasping at his fore arms to pull him closer.
"I know," he replied, "I know darlin' "
Your hips pushed upwards against his, desperately seeking some friction as you grinded your hips against his. He groaned as your clothed cunt made firmer contact with his crotch which was painfully hard by now. staring down at you with a fierce amount of hunger behind his eyes, pupils blown wide with lust and need as he gazed at your half exposed chest. Tugging at the fabric, your dress slipped further down your body, and he eagerly grabbed at your bra, one handedly unclapsing it at the back. "y' want me to touch you baby?' he murmured, smoothing his hand across the valley of your now bare breasts upon the whine you emitted. "God- Please," you urged. "you gotta tell me sweetheart," he responded, his face visibly twisting in pleasure at the sight of your perfectly shaped breasts, his hand big enough to take one in his hand, kneeding the soft fat of them as he watched your lashes flutter excessively and listened to the gasps that left your lips. "Gotta tell me what you want,"
"touch me please" you replied, looking up to him through your lashes, purposely pressing yourself against his erection growing heavy in his jeans. You could practically feel how big he was through the denim, see the shape of his dick through the fabric. You felt yourself growing increasingly aroused, wetness collecting between your thighs, feeling it dripping and dampening the flimsy cloth of your panties and shuddering at the feeling.
Joel hummed in response, "Can I take his off?" he asked softly, gesturing to the dress halfway down your waist. "Please," you whispered, nodding eagerly. You watched as he slid the fabric further down, his hands dwarfing your waist as they travelled down your body, until your dress was off, leaving your soaked panties the only source of cover. Joel groaned lowly at the sight of the wet spot on the lace cloth. "You're so damn wet already," he mumbles, "So fuckin wet, all for me?"
"All for you," you whined, watching him slide the flimsy underwear down your legs, and your body is all bare for him to see. "so pretty, so fuckin pretty," he praised, hands gripping at your hips, one slipping down to graze your inner thigh, "You want me to touch you? touch you here baby?" He asked, gently swiping his thumb up and down your pussy, gasping lowly at the feeling of how dripping you were for him. "Yes- Please god," you pleaded, your hips bucking up into his touch, "Don't stop Please," you begged, shuddering at the feeling of him thumbing at your clit.
"I won't darlin' your doing so good, so damn good" he praised, marvelling at the sight of your glistening cunt that was no doubt aching for him to touch more. His fingers circled around your clit like he loved it, completely engrossed in the sweet sounds you were making.
"that's it baby-" he murmured, watching your face contort with sheer pleasure as he circled his finger around your entrance, feeling it dripping with arousal. You let out a choked moan as he pushed a finger gently into you, stopping when it reached the knuckle. "Oh fuck- joel," you whimpered, "Fuck," you whispered, the sight of his large and calloused finger sliding in and out of your pussy made you moan, feeling so full by just one of his digits. "Good girl," he praised, his other hand traveling upwards to cup your breast, kneeding the soft flesh as he set a pace of sliding his finger in and out of your dripping entrance, moments later adding a second. Your cunt clenched around the size of his now two fingers entering you at a staggering speed, you craned your head down to capture the sight below, Joel's large dampened fingers slipping in and out of your pussy as his thumb rubbed against the most sensitive place on your clit. Gasping and clenching helplessly, the warm feeling deep in your stomach grew, filling you with esctasy.
The sensation was so big, so much that you felt close already, your whines becoming more louder as you reached that euphoric feeling you were chasing. "Joel, God im gonna-fuck joel!" you cried out desperately. "thats it, cmon baby," he urged, his fingers relentlessly fucking into you, not giving you any relief, not that you wanted any anyway. you gave a strangled moan, struggling to catch your breath as the warmth in your stomach grew and grew, and it finally snapped, gripping onto Joel's bicep for support as a indescribable feeling of pleasure washed over you.
Your body shuddered as you came, your cunt clenching and fluttering around his fingers as he watched your eyebrows knit together in pleasure, eyes closed as you moaned at the feeling of your orgasm. "Fuck," he groaned.
His eyes marvelled all over you, gasping lowly at the sight of your glistening pussy before him. Damp, sweaty skin shivering from the aftermath of your orgasm. "Fuck baby," he commented, hand rubbing at the soft flesh of your thigh encouragingly.
Your hands tugged on his biceps, urging him into a kiss as you came down from such a high. Your tongues roughly intertwined as you grasped the back of his head, yours and his damp skin clashing and smoothing together. His hands swept round your back, gently gripping the skin. The both of you pulled away for air, and you looked up to meet his eyes.
Half lidded eyes flickered up to meet yours, his styled hair had come loose, tumbling over his forehead as it stuck to his skin, lips swelled and parted in breath. "I wanna feel you," you whispered between pants. His eyes studied yours for many seconds. "Fuck-" he mumbled, giving you a swift once over before his hand came to the back of your neck. "yeah? " he drawled lowly, pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth.
The buttons of his jeans soon came undone, and he discarded them swiftly as they came down his legs. Not much was left to imagine when you saw his hardened dick against his boxers, the sheer size behind the dark fabric causing you to shiver.
The more skin uncovered, the more you yearned and ached to feel him, to wrap your hands around his broadness. To have his hold you firm against him whilst you took in every single sensation. You audibly moaned at the thought as he rid himself of all clothing, staring at the sight infront of you.
He was so big, beyond what you imagined, your mouth felt wetter than ever before. The muscles of his stomach and the prominent v line that drew the path to his dick were unbelievable. His dick was hardened, thick and glistening at the head with pre-cum, enough to make your mouth water. "Joel," you uttered, grabbing at his shoulders once you had took him in, but it still didn't feel like you'd looked enough. "I know sweetheart," he replied, sitting back into the couch as you swung a leg over his, his hands finding your hips. "You sure?" he suddenly interjected, giving your sides a encouraged squeeze as you nodded. "m' sure," you replied a little dazed, feeling the wetness gathering between your thighs once again.
You felt his dick against your cunt, and the both of you gasped. Joel rose from lying back on the couch to meet you, desperate to properly wrap his hands around your middle. Almost immediately, you lifted your hips. Watching as his cock came even nearer to your entrance as you lowered yourself down. The head of his cock breeched you, and you gasped as the sensation, his dick nudges inside of your dripping cunt, and you gladly let it. Joel groaned as he felt and watched you sink down onto him, welcoming your pussy as it clenched around him immediately. "Joel-" you choked out, biting down on your lip harshly once you reached the hilt. "So fucking big," you groaned, and he huffed a laugh. "You can take it baby trust me,"
"trust me, just relax," you hear him whisper into your neck, his lips pressing a soft kiss to the skin on your shoulder.
His hands pressed against your hips, uttering a curse as you began to move, rocking your hips weakly against his. "Fuuck," he whispered, watching your face stirred with pleasure as you moved up and down on his cock with a quickened pace, the hands on your hips guiding your moments encouragingly. "So good baby," he urged, groaning as your cunt clenched around him. Your whines filled the air, the sounds heightening when his cock hit a particular place inside, sending a indescribable feeling down your thighs, and a chill spreading down your spin.
Joel watched as your tits bounced in a soft motion at the movements, so perfect looking, just like the rest of you in this moment. "That's it sweetheart," he said, capturing your lips in a searing kiss right in the heat of the moment, pressing you against him as you rode him. Your nails scratching at his back, clawing at the skin. Your head was in the clouds, moans muffled against his lips as his tongue ran against your bottom lip, kisses sloppily shared. That familiar feeling was building in your stomach, the warmth beginning to heat up, swirling. "M' close," you whined between kisses. clenching your thighs around his legs to hold onto him tighter. "I know baby,"
The sounds filled the room, skin slapping together, quickened and desperate pants and breaths, groans and whines that grew louder as the two of you became significantly closer. Joel raised his hips up to meet yours with every bounce you did on his cock, beginning to fuck up into you, fingers digging into your skin daring to leave bruises from the pressure. Your eyes rolled upwards, lips parted to form an 'o' shape as he fucked up into you. The size of his dick was overwhelming, filling you to the near brim with pleasure, smacking against that one place deep inside that made you groan and curl your fingers into his hair, shuddering at the relentless pace of his thrusts.
"good girl," he lowly reminded, his perspirated skin pressing against yours, even firmer with every motion. "knew you could take it," you hear him groan into your skin as he grew closer and closer, you knew by the act of his thrusts becoming sloppier and his moans becoming more strangled.
You came probably harder than you had ever before, crying out from the sudden snap of your orgasm, launching a burst of pleasure all at once as you writhed and clenched around his dick still pushing in and out of you, but Joel wasn't far away from his either way. He groaned shakily as you felt him swiftly pull out just after he got you through your high. You shuddered as you felt him leave you, immediately missing the feeling of him being so far and deep into your pussy. Seconds later thick stripes of white painted your stomach, and the both of you collapsed on each other, bodies heaving and panting as you both came down from your high's, Joels arms still cradling your back tightly, hands smoothing up and down your warm and damp skin.
He looked ridiculously good even now, the small collection of fine lines coated with a sheen of sweat, and his eyes slightly weary as he looked you over. "okay?" he murmured, smoothing back your unruly hair, to which you nodded.
"Joel?"
"Mm,"
"we can go to bed now,"
Thank you for reading! Make sure to leave a like, or give your requests, would be very much appreciated. I will start writing for other characters and will release a list soon on who i will write on. Thanks lovely's <3
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togglesbloggle · 1 year ago
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For the Reverse Unpopular Opinion meme, Lamarckism!
(This is an excellent ask.)
Lamarck got done a bit dirty by the textbooks, as one so often is. He's billed as the guy who articulated an evolutionary theory of inherited characteristics, inevitably set up as an opponent made of straw for Darwin to knock down. The example I recall my own teachers using in grade school was the idea that a giraffe would strain to reach the highest branches of a tree, and as a result, its offspring would be born with slightly longer necks. Ha-ha-ha, isn't-that-silly, isn't natural selection so much more sensible?
But the thing is, this wasn't his idea, not even close. People have been running with ideas like that since antiquity at least. What Lamarck did was to systematize that claim, in the context of a wider and much more interesting theory.
Lamarck was born in to an era where natural philosophy was slowly giving way to Baconian science in the modern sense- that strange, eighteenth century, the one caught in an uneasy tension between Newton the alchemist and Darwin the naturalist. This is the century of Ben Franklin and his key and his kite, and the awed discovery that this "electricity" business was somehow involved in living organisms- the discovery that paved the way for Shelley's Frankenstein. This was the era when alchemy was fighting its last desperate battles with chemistry, when the division between 'organic' and 'inorganic' chemistry was fundamental- the first synthesis of organic molecules in the laboratory wouldn't occur until 1828, the year before Lamarck's death. We do not have atoms, not yet. Mendel and genetics are still more than a century away; we won't even have cells for another half-century or more.
Lamarck stepped in to that strange moment. I don't think he was a bold revolutionary, really, or had much interest in being one. He was profoundly interested in the structure and relationships between species, and when we're not using him as a punching bag in grade schools, some people manage to remember that he was a banging good taxonomist, and made real progress in the classification of invertebrates. He started life believing in the total immutability of species, but later was convinced that evolution really was occurring- not because somebody taught him in the classroom, or because it was the accepted wisdom of the time, but through deep, continued exposure to nature itself. He was convinced by the evidence of his senses.
(Mostly snails.)
His problem was complexity. When he'd been working as a botanist, he had this neat little idea to order organisms by complexity, starting with the grubbiest, saddest little seaweed or fern, up through lovely flowering plants. This was not an evolutionary theory, just an organizing structure; essentially, just a sort of museum display. But when he was asked to do the same thing with invertebrates, he realized rather quickly that this task had problems. A linear sorting from simple to complex seemed embarrassingly artificial, because it elided too many different kinds of complexity, and ignored obvious similarities and shared characteristics.
When he went back to the drawing board, he found better organizing schema; you'd recognize them today. There were hierarchies, nested identities. Simple forms with only basic, shared anatomical patterns, each functioning as a sort of superset implying more complex groups within it, defined additively by the addition of new organs or structures in the body. He'd made a taxonomic tree.
Even more shockingly, he realized something deep and true in what he was looking at: this wasn't just an abstract mapping of invertebrates to a conceptual diagram of their structures. This was a map in time. Complexities in invertebrates- in all organisms!- must have been accumulating in simpler forms, such that the most complicated organisms were also the youngest.
This is the essential revolution of Lamarckian evolution, not the inherited characteristics thing. His theory, in its full accounting, is actually quite elaborate. Summarized slightly less badly than it is in your grade school classroom (though still pretty badly, I'm by no means an expert on this stuff), it looks something like this:
As we all know, animals and plants are sometimes generated ex nihilo in different places, like maggots spontaneously appearing in middens. However, the spontaneous generation of life is much weaker than we have supposed; it can only result in the most basic, simple organisms (e.g. polyps). All the dizzying complexity we see in the world around us must have happened iteratively, in a sequence over time that operated on inheritance between one organism and its descendants.
As we all know, living things are dynamic in relation to inorganic matter, and this vital power includes an occasional tendency to gain in complexity. However, this tendency is not a spiritual or supernatural effect; it's a function of natural, material processes working over time. Probably this has something to do with fluids such as 'heat' and 'electricity' which are known to concentrate in living tissues. When features appear spontaneously in an organism, that should be understood as an intrinsic propensity of the organism itself, rather than being caused by the environment or by a divine entity. There is a specific, definite, and historically contingent pattern in which new features can appear in existing organisms.
As we all know, using different tissue groups more causes them to be expressed more in your descendants, and disuse weakens them in the same way. However, this is not a major feature in the development of new organic complexity, since it could only move 'laterally' on the complexity ladder and will never create new organs or tissue groups. At most, you might see lineages move from ape-like to human-like or vice versa, or between different types of birds or something; it's an adaptive tendency that helps organisms thrive in different environments. In species will less sophisticated neural systems, this will be even less flexible, because they can't supplement it with willpower the way that complex vertebrates can.
Lamarck isn't messing around here; this is a real, genuinely interesting model of the world. And what I think I'm prepared to argue here is that Lamarck's biggest errors aren't his. He has his own blind spots and mistakes, certainly. The focus on complexity is... fraught, at a minimum. But again and again, what really bites him in the ass is just his failure to break with his inherited assumptions enough. The parts of this that are actually Lamarckian, that is, are the ideas of Lamarck, are very clearly groping towards a recognizable kind of proto-evolutionary theory.
What makes Lamarck a punching bag in grade-school classes today is the same thing that made it interesting; it's that it was the best and most scientific explanation of biological complexity available at the time. It was the theory to beat, the one that had edged out all the other competitors and emerged as the most useful framework of the era. And precisely none of that complexity makes it in to our textbooks; they use "Lamarckianism" to refer to arguments made by freaking Aristotle, and which Lamarck himself accepted but de-emphasized as subordinate processes. What's even worse, Darwin didn't reject this mechanism either. Darwin was totally on board with the idea as a possible adaptive tendency; he just didn't particularly need it for his theory.
Lamarck had nothing. Not genetics, not chromosomes, not cells, not atomic theory. Geology was a hot new thing! Heat was a liquid! What Lamarck had was snails. And on the basis of snails, Lamarck deduced a profound theory of complexity emerging over time, of the biosphere as a(n al)chemical process rather than a divine pageant, of gradual adaptation punctuated by rapid innovation. That's incredible.
There's a lot of falsehood in the Lamarckian theory of evolution, and it never managed to entirely throw off the sloppy magical thinking of what came before. But his achievement was to approach biology and taxonomy with a profound scientific curiosity, and to improve and clarify our thinking about those subjects so dramatically that a theory of biology could finally, triumphantly, be proven wrong. Lamarck is falsifiable. That is a victory of the highest order.
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centaurianthropology · 11 days ago
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What LeeBeeBee does for the Story of ‘Murderbot’
So we’ve finally met Blonde Lady in the series (her name is LeeBeeBee), and I think she’s filling a really interesting and important role plot-wise and worldbuilding-wise, and doing so in unexpected ways that are surprising even book-readers.  She’s wholly original to the show, so no one knows what precisely the writers have planned for her.
But I certainly have thoughts and predictions. 
I figured I’d break my thoughts on her up into two sections.  The first section is for all the folks who are show-only, and I’ll only be examining her role in S1E5, without any additional speculation pulling from book knowledge and what I think the writers are doing with her in the longer term.  The second part will speculate on the upcoming episode, and how I think it could play out.  No idea if I’m right about everything (or anything!), but it’s always fun to speculate!
FUNCTION IN S1E5 (SPOILERS FOR E1-5)
Let’s kick it off by talking about LeeBeeBee in isolation in this episode, what her function in this particular episode was, what she does for the plot, the larger world, and what she does for the storytelling format. 
Let’s start with her plot function, the most obvious part of her role in this episode.  She appears at the beginning as the sole survivor of DeltFall, makeup smeared and uniform dirty.  This immediately sets her apart from the PresAux gang.  She’s apparently the indentured cleaner that DeltFall rented for the hab along with the SecUnits, and this cleaner is wearing makeup despite having a physically laborious job in a field unit on a mostly-uninhabited planet. 
This small bit of visual storytelling sets DeltFall up as a very different society to PresAux.  PresAux deliberately only took one (cheap) SecUnit, which is understandable given their objections to using constructs as slave labor.  None of them wear makeup in the field, and they certainly don’t have a cleaner.
But DeltFall not only had multiple constructs, but also an indentured servant to do housekeeping, and there is either an expectation or a cultural norm that she be made up while she do her indentured job.  They feel, from this introduction, very Corporation Rim. 
LeeBeeBee herself acts as a personification of the Corporation Rim on a level we haven’t been able to dig into with the limited screentime of the Company Tech Bro sales reps.  From her first scene on the hopper, she feels like she’s from a completely different world to the empathetic and sweet Preservationers.  She almost immediately objectifies SecUnit in a way that is openly offputting to both the audience and clearly to the Preservation crew, who likely don’t say anything both out of shock and out of some belief that this woman has to have some sort of brain damage to say something like that.
But this level of objectification, I think, lies at the heart of the Corporation Rim.  It’s not that constructs are objects, but their workers are valued.  LeeBeeBee is an indentured servant.  She has no more free will than SecUnit.  She objectifies it because she sees herself as a step above a construct, and in the CR hierarchy, you’re likely encouraged to objectify anyone beneath you.  And that comes around to something equally uncomfortable when she finds out it’s got a hacked governor module and is a rogue.  She views it as a person now, but what does that mean? 
She objectifies herself for it. 
And doesn’t that make the worst sort of sense on a survival level for a person in her position?  She’s fully adapted to doing what she has to do to survive.  She views sex in an incredibly transactional and exploitative way.  When she thinks SecUnit is an object, she has the power and she immediately speculates about using it as a sex toy.  When she shifts into thinking of it as a person, she also knows how dangerous it is, and reverses their power dynamic, offering sex as a transactional way to protect herself. 
It’s awful, deliberately so.  But I think it’s a great and visceral way to get into the Corporation Rim mindset: constructs aren’t special; everyone who isn’t wealthy or powerful is an object.  You don’t get to be a person with fully autonomous choices until you’re one of the elite.  Until then, sex is just another way of trying to get a slight advantage in an endless rat race.
Having LeeBeeBee represent this deeply uncomfortable aspect of an end-stage capitalist hellscape like the CR also does something on a storytelling level.  This addition of an outsider character fully shifts the POV in the show.  Up until her introduction, the PresAux crew felt like the strange outsiders that MB was judging, but by introducing the worst possible representation of the CR, our alignment completely shifts.  We are not only on Preservation’s side, but we are insiders with them.  They now feel normal and lived in, and she feels like the outsider.  And this reflects the shift going on in Murderbot.  Even before it’s willing to acknowledge it, through the framing of LeeBeeBee we subconsciously know it has realigned itself with the PresAux crew. 
So that’s why I think she was an effective addition in this episode.  If you’re interested in some book spoilers and speculation for the next episode, jump below the cut.
FUNCTION IN S1E6 AND BEYOND (SPECULATION, SPOILERS FOR ‘ALL SYSTEMS RED’)
Are they gone?
Groovy.  Let’s get under the hood and talk about all the ways she’s working on multiple levels, not just embodying all the worst parts of the CR as I previously mentioned, but playing it up as a means of camoflage.  Because LeeBeeBee is almost certainly a GrayCris plant, precisely what SecUnit and Mensah were worried about, and the crew absolutely did take her in despite the danger because they are good people.  And they would do the right thing, even if Murderbot objected.
It’s so nice to get to see exactly how DeltFall might have been infiltrated, which we didn’t get to see in the book.  And so many of her lines read differently when you think of her as a plant.  Did DeltFall call PresAux ‘the Amateurs,’ or was that GrayCris?  Did DeltFall actually have an indentured servant, or is that GrayCris?
I think that a lot of what she’s saying is truthful, or is just a slight twist on the truth.  I do think she’s likely indentured.  I do think she views others and herself as objects to be used and exploited and discarded.  She’s suffering under one of the cruelest practices in the Corporation Rim, but she’s still fully bought into the CR propaganda and mindset.  Rather than defecting and embracing freedom the way Gurathin likely did, she’s almost certainly looking at getting years shaved off her indenture by acting as an infiltrator and assassin
That’s so perfectly horrid.  She would rather still be indentured but get in better with her bosses than accept real freedom.  It’s a cowardice I think we can all see in our world, that she would take the safe misery and be willing to hurt others to do it, rather than take a major risk and step outside the system.
She’s also dialing up her inherent objectification of others to a level that makes her deliberately off-putting, so the PresAux crew want to look away from her rather than examining her too closely.  If they just want to sort of ignore her, then they’re not going to dig too far into her actions.  If she runs off to communicate back to GrayCris regarding a rogue SecUnit they’re not going to follow her, and are going to be glad to get a break from her.
Her distraction tactics work particularly well against Murderbot, who she makes wildly uncomfortable to the point it’s very glad to get away from her, and is likely deliberately trying not to think of her.  If you watch who she’s targeting with this barrage of unpleasantness, she does it first as a blanket with the crew to gauge reaction, then targets it at SecUnit once she realizes that it’s not being controlled by the combat override, and that it’s fully rogue.  There’s no easy way for her to control it (as I suspect she was controlling the DeltFall SecUnits), so she had to improvise, because as far as she’s concerned, this independent SecUnit is the #1 threat to her plan to kill the PresAux crew.  She must have been so relieved when it went with Mensah to trigger the beacon, because she knew the beacon was rigged to explode, and she had a good chance of getting rid of both the biggest threat and the team leader, and she didn’t even have to do anything!
Which, to her mind, only leaves the rest of the PresAux team to deal with.  After SecUnit, she almost certainly considers Gurathin the next biggest threat, because she would certainly underestimate the Preservationers, but he’s ex-corporate, so she would respect the threat he posed.  So after Mensah and SecUnit are gone, she zeroes in on Gurathin.
I think she almost certainly has a dossier or some other large amount of personal and professional information about him from his days in the CR.  What did she do when she first talked to him after Mensah and Murderbot were gone?  She offered him a stimulant.  I’m now convinced that his therapy modules were—in addition to being for generalized trauma (why did you learn to be quiet, Gurathin??)—meant to treat a stimulant addiction he struggled with after using them to work whatever insane hours he was required to work when he was in the CR. 
I think this next episode is going to be Gurathin-heavy.  The writers are setting up deliberate contrasts between the die-hard-to-a-horrific-level Corpo LeeBeeBee and Defector-with-Trauma ex-Corpo Gurathin.  I wonder if he won’t try to sort of reach out to her in the next episode (was he indentured too?), convince her to defect too, only to have her turn it all around on him and use his backstory against him.  If he was indentured, did he break contract to run to Preservation?  Is there a bounty on him?  Is there a bounty on his AUGMENTS, body not needed in return?
I sort of have an image of the next episode playing out like a horror film, where we realize that LeeBeeBee is the exact infiltrator that took out DeltFall, that GrayCris SecUnits are incoming, MB and Mensah may already be dead, and the person who was responsible for the DeltFall massacre is inside the hab right now.
Especially if we don’t know what happened to MB and Mensah for the majority of the episode, instead focusing on the rest of the group.  Without the snarky voiceover, the terror of the situation could really get hammered home.  Again, this is fully speculation of how it might play out next episode, but my guess is that the big cliffhanger next episode is going to be LeeBeeBee attacking Gurathin.  Previews have shown him with a bandage on his leg, and holding a cane, which some people have pointed out looks like a blind walking cane.  That makes me wonder if she manages to not only disable him with a shot to the leg, but damage visual augments he might have, rendering him partially blind.
I think we’ve also been getting a lot of background work with Gurathin being terrified of rejection and abandonment throughout this season.  He and MB parallel one another in not wanting to share Mensah, because they both are afraid the other will manage to take her from them (completely ignoring that Mensah has two fucking hands, and more than enough love in her to love her family, and both of these idiots too).  If LeeBeeBee really wants to twist the knife in him, she’s going to tell him that if the others are going to survive, they have to abandon him.
And Pin-Lee, Arada, Bharadwaj, and Ratthi are almost certainly going to refuse.  Much like Mensah refused to abandon MB when it was damaged, they’re going to refuse to leave their friend behind.  Because they can disagree with him, they can think he’s wrong about SecUnit, but they still love him and won’t leave him.
This sets up E7 to be the big turning point between the nadir of act 2 (MB and Mensah may be dead, Gurathin is injured, and the others are in direct danger because they won’t leave him behind), and the start of act 3 (MB and Mensah return and save everyone!  They can all come together, defeat GrayCris and escape alive!). 
And all of this gets facilitated because of the introduction of LeeBeeBee, who acts as a face for GrayCris (and likely a way to give us information about them) and for the whole vicious corporate people-as-objects theme that consumes the Corporation Rim.  It’s so much easier to loath GrayCris when we can see the sorts of people it creates, and she is such a great example of that.
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dog-bimbo · 18 days ago
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explicit content, unprotected sex, power imbalance, coercion, transactional sex, objectification, degradation, cheating. eighteen and above only. minors do not interact. part one.
you didn’t think it’d last this long. the heels, the lipstick, the dinners where men twice your age leaned in like they were trying to eat you up. but the money came in every week—tuition, rent, a little extra folded into envelopes when shiu felt generous—more so when you let him bend you over the hotel vanity and use you like he was late for a meeting.
but that was extra, optional to be specific. he paid for your essentials regardless. your job was simple: show up, look good, smile like you meant it, laugh like the clients earned it. he wasn't bothered with entertaining and pleasing the clients, he was just there to talk shop.
“wear the blue,” he told you once. “holds your tits in just enough to make men imagine pulling them out.”
“keep your hair down. men don’t want cute. they want to fuck something that looks soft.”
“don’t wear that vanilla body spray, you’re not fifteen. try smelling like warm skin or nothing at all.”
it wasn’t flirtation, it was function. he talked about you like a high-end product—something he'd selected, optimized, and kept in his rotation because you did the job. and you told yourself you hated that, you hated being tweaked like this.
but you still wore blue.
still washed off the perfume.
still showed up.
shiu wasn’t kind. he didn’t do post-dinner affection, didn’t text you after, didn’t ask if you got home safe. he didn’t even kiss you—just got what he paid for. you had conflicted towards him to put it lightly. the pay was good, his attitude was... tolerable. barely. but that dick game was insane.
you got a boyfriend soon—he was sweet, he was everything shiu wasn't. he believed the lie you fed him about having a pr job.
you told yourself you were done with hotel nights, told him too. “just dinners,” you said. “no more private rooms. i'm tired.” you couldn't make out what he was thinking, like ever. he simply scanned you, his eyes on that oversized hoodie you wore that was clearly not yours after the dinner, “is it because of a boyfriend?” and shiu didn’t push, he never pushed. “yeah, is that a problem?” you sounded like you wanted him to have a problem with this. “nah, as long as he doesn't have a say in your schedules.” he laughed it off, his eyes back on the road.
“dinner thursday,” he said, flicking ash outside the window. “wear something tight. clients this time are real old, they need something to look at while they talk.” he handed you the card for the car service, the dress bag and didn’t ask about the rest. he didn’t really care, he was just... amused.
on thursday night, you took the dress out and added your own touches, higher heels, thigh high stockings, no panties, dark lipstick and liner so sharp it could cut. you even wore that body oil he once said made your skin look “like something worth buying.” you looked like what he liked—but sluttier, desperate and stupid. you were pissed at how nonchalant he was—no matter how wrong it was to feel this way.
he noticed the second you stepped into the booth. you caught him looking, not in awe, in slight amusement. his tongue pressed flat to the inside of his cheek for half a second before he sipped his whiskey. that was enough. you didn’t dress like that for the clients.
not really. you dressed for him. the client asked if you were a dancer. “only if the money’s good,” you said with a giggle.
you sat down with the clients, angled toward shiu like you were ready to purr on command, but every move you made—every laugh, every little moan over the wine, every stroke of your fingers along your thigh—was for shiu.
you didn’t just cross your legs, you uncrossed them first—let the dress ride up just enough for shiu to see that you're not wearing panties. you go over the menu like you didn’t know how to read, you let your tits press onto anything, eyes wide and dumb as you get cush. the clients chuckled, condescending and flattered.
you leaned close to the client while you talked—but your legs stayed angled toward shiu. every giggle, every squirm, every tilt of your body as you sipped your wine—it was all for him, always for him.
he knew what you were doing. he didn’t stop you. didn’t tell you to tone it down. didn’t whisper “enough.” he let you play the part, let you show yourself off like meat to old men while his own eyes undressed you slowly, methodically, like he was already planning what to do when he got you alone.
he knew you were asking for it. things went well, the clients were wealthy men after all. but this time, his biggest problem was you.
in the car, he finally touched you—grabbed your jaw, thumb sliding into your mouth like he was testing the softness. “you keep trying to get my attention like that and i’ll let them take turns next time. you’d like that, wouldn’t you? one after the other, just like a real professional.”
you went quiet.
you followed him to the hotel—you were still high on adrenaline. you stood there in front of the bed, waiting for him to strip you. he didn’t—it took a bit of restraint from his part because he was hard as fuck.
“lift it,” he said, lighting a cigarette and settling down on the worn leather couch. “let me see what you dressed up for.”
you hiked the hem up and stood right in front of him. he exhaled slow, “you’re fucking pathetic,” he muttered. “showing up like this... you wanted me to break that little rule of yours, didn’t you?” you didn’t answer, guilt really did knock the air out of you.
he pulled you onto his lap, dragging his fingers down and inside your wet cunt. “you’re soaked... whoring out to old men got you off, huh?” you nodded, bit your lip and tried not to moan but how could you not?... you missed being full of his fingers.
he knew how to work you out so, so well. and when he slid his dick inside, he didn’t pace it, he just let you ride your high. “you think they can’t all tell? that you’re the kind of girl who fucks for rent and likes it?”
you came too fast and slumped over his chest. “i ain't done yet, bitch.” he grabbed your hips and dragged you back down for more. you felt so overstimulated due to his tip reaching till the hilt of your pussy, you swore you could see stars. he used your tits like leverage, slapped your ass raw until you couldn’t tell whether you were moaning or crying.
and when he was done painting your walls white, you didn’t move.
he laid back, lit another cigarette as his arms curled up around your waist. you rested against him like a girl who thought it meant something. you laid your cheek against his chest, your legs still sticky, your breath coming shallow. you didn’t want love.
you wanted to belong to something mean, someone like him. your phone buzzed, he glanced at it and saw your boyfriend’s name. “tell him you’re safe or something."
you didn’t move. because you weren’t safe—you were exactly where you wanted to be.
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