#Adam is my go-to fake name for when I dont want to tell people my real name and/or confuse them further about my gender identity. but it

[spacepunksupreme]

Passed by a middle-aged man in the grocery store just now who was playing Shape of My Heart by Sting aloud out of his apple watch, I was also listening to this exact song on my earbuds like a minute ahead of him, so I stopped and was like “omg are you listening to Sting right now? I’m listening to that exact same song right now too :D I love Sting he’s like my favorite.”

Mistake; this man looked down at me with the most awe-struck, love-filled eyes Ive ever seen, introduced himself to me, asked me what my name was (I told him my name was Adam. Second mistake because he said “Wow! That’s so unique of you, I love that, you seem so special”) and started trying to tell me other things about himself/ ask me questions about myself and I had to just be like “haha cool” and speed-walk away.

I can only assume this man has been playing Sting out loud in grocery stores just waiting for his weird girl sugar baby soulmate to recognize Sting and talk to him or something. I believe she’s out there, John. But I’m not her. I’m sorry, John, keep looking for her in the grocery store. Lmao

[seyaryminamoto]

Will Iroh mend fences with Azula and support her by the end of Part 2 or The beginning of Part 3 once the truth comes out or will there still be animosity coming from both of them due to past arguments? Call me crazy, because i have a weird feeling Iroh will be (one of) the reason/s because of their one-on-one a couple chapters ago. I hope this is not the case though cause i think, because thats cruel even for Iroh and i dont thinks that's the kind of character you want him to be portrayed as.

Well, uh, gee, look at the time! I am just gonna....

Okay, okay, FINE then, I can answer, I totally can...

Foooor the record... I’m not actively trying to portray Iroh as a bad or good person: I’m trying to portray him as a person, period. The whole point of this story arc was to generate a rather complicated situation where someone can actually understand both why Azula is so adamant about protecting her biggest secret (Iroh has been aaaaaaabsolutely nightmarish throughout Part 2 to her and some of her friends, namely over saltiness because Zuko is gone, she has zero reason to trust him after he’s been acting this way for as long as he did), and why Iroh is simultaneously willing to believe Azula MAY not be as bad as he thought she was while still feeling considerably reluctant to leave the fate of the Fire Nation and the world at large in her hands.

But alas, I... will say Iroh and Azula will work together at one point in Part 2′s penultimate arc. Circumstances will force them to cooperate in a complicated operation, so they won’t be constantly at each other’s throats right then. Still, it’s a circumstantial matter where the two of them realize the more people on their side, the better, and they join forces because of that rather than any genuine mending of fences. If you want to see them being cordial-ish again, however, you can look forward to that.

Now, then, will Iroh be on Azula’s side in Part 2′s conclusion and Part 3 as a whole? Will he try to help her...?

... The answer to that, for an array of reasons, in a thousand ways, is no. Eventually, yes, Iroh will decide something needs to be done to help Azula, if you MUST know that much, but he won’t be anywhere near her for, uh... most of Part 3, honestly, if they ever meet again in Part 3 it’s probably only going to be one scene and I can’t even guarantee that it will happen.

Again, I try my best to write Iroh as a character with understandable motivations while keeping in mind his canon self, taking into account as well that he is living in a world at war that, as per the predictions he was given over ten years prior, should NOT be at war at all anymore, but it still is. The man is frustrated, confused, unsure if he’s going about things the right way or not, and while I’m never going to call myself an Iroh fan, I would be lying if I said I don’t understand where he’s coming from, or that, in a similar situation with a family member I can’t seem to get along with and who basically laughed in my face when I finally tried to extend an olive branch to them, I wouldn’t feel as frustrated and lost as Iroh does right now. Likewise, I completely understand Azula considering Iroh 100% unworthy of knowing the truth: what if they have another falling out after this, same as they did back at the end of Part 1 despite they were perfectly friendly after the events in Ba Sing Se? How can she trust someone who, as far as she can tell, will never truly trust her? There’s people, yes, that she can trust with her secret... but Iroh, out of the many characters in our main cast, simply hasn’t proven to be one of them.

I don’t want my characters to be heroes or villains, something that I REALLY hope will show in Part 3 (once I get my ass moving and... get started with that...), and I don’t write them that way because, frankly, that flat-out bores me xD I intended for Zhao to just be a villain for a veeeeery long time while plotting Gladiator and I got so bored writing him that way during the late arcs of Part 1 and the early ones in Part 2 that I decided I needed to make him more interesting and dynamic than he had been, both in my story and in canon. There were some ideas I had for further developing him from early on (Ozai’s flashback to his first encounter with him, as seen in Chapter 57), but all of it was always poised in order to present him as a villain and like I said, I was just BORED. Characters with no motivation beyond villainy aren’t worth writing xD hence, Iroh is a much more complicated character than that. It’s easy enough to see him as an antagonist in Gladiator, he has been one in countless ways, but he was an ally for a while as well, wasn’t he? He wasn’t faking being friends with them back in late Part 1, he actually allowed himself to think Azula wasn’t that terrible, briefly as it was, and even offered her help with a few things back then, such as his advice with how she could approach the ceremony. But as complications arise, characters react, and that’s how we got to where we’re at :’D

What I have in mind for Iroh may not be what anyone wants it to be, it may not make a lot of people happy, I might get a lot of strong reactions because of it... I’m honestly expecting it because I’ve gotten such reactions nearly with every impopular choice I’ve ever made with his character (and with a lot of things in this story, in general). As long as the decision makes sense with the story’s logic and the character’s arc... I’ll stand by it, whatever the consequences may be. That’s part of what being a writer entails, as far as I’ve been able to tell over the course of the past years.

[petewentzisblack1312]

Hi… I wanted to ask this on anon so I didn’t ask on your personal, idk if this is too personal or anything to ask but

Do you have a problem with people saying they have a mental disorder if they don’t have a diagnosis? Like for me so… I have been diagnosed with anxiety but I am like 99% sure I have bipolar disorder. And like I know you can’t diagnose me so I’m not going to go into depth with my symptoms but ever since I was like, 11, I used to get very depressed to the point where I contemplated ending it but then i would snap out of it and I think for me my manic phase are hypomanic bc ive never experienced like the full range of those symptoms but my depressive phases get very rough esp if I have external stressors but it will go through what I assume to be these phases like sometimes within the day esp if I have a stressor.

I am in nursing school and I work at a psych hospital so like this isn’t coming out of nowhere, I am very familiar with all mental disorders and it was actually during my psych nursing class and learning about bipolar disorder that I was like… hm… why does this feel like a mirror right now. I am aware I should get to a therapist and get an actual diagnosis (if I had money I would lol) but like idk. Idk if it’s worth going to my doctor at my physical and being like “hey I think I have this” I am lucky enough now that I am in a good place and can manage my symptoms but I am terrified I will go through a stressor again and lose it so idk. I mean I feel like I already know the answer but I wanted to ask anyway to see your take :/

Anyway idk as a future medical professional I think self diagnosis got a bad rep and it’s like idk I think for mental disorders esp you can tell if you have anxiety and it’s a persistent problem. You can tell if you have depression. I know bipolar disorder is harder to diagnose but idk I think since I’m in the field it’s easier? Idk I felt like a sense of relief with learning about it and finding similarities and being like “well maybe that’s why I’m like that”. But idk now I’m feeling uneasy bc I don’t have a diagnosis and I don’t want to be like, stepping over people who were diagnosed. Thank you in advance if you read all this and yeah I’m sorry I know it’s a lot and this is controversial

ok this is a long post so im putting it under a cut but tldr, no i dont have a problem with it. it doesnt matter if you actually have an illness, it matters if you find a solution to your problem. if treating yourself like you have a certain condition makes it easier to go through life, then keep doing what works for you, you are doing nothing wrong. this all goes for physical and mental illnesses.

im a firm proponent of self diagnosis. i wouldnt be here if i didnt have the confidence to research mental illnesses and advocate for myself. as someone who is extremely familiar with the medical profession on account of being the daughter of a doctor and a nurse and spending my childhood running around a hospital, im extremely privileged to even have the knowledge and ability to do so, and i try to bear in mind the understandable hesitancy of people without this advantage. i know that you are well within your right to refuse medication that makes you sick, i know that you can complain about a doctor that isnt listening to you, i know that you are allowed and encouraged to be adamant about things you are told dont matter, and in addition to that, i have a VERY well known doctor and a nurse in my corner, and i am STILL treated as though i do not understand my own experiences enough to have any authority more often than i am not.

the reason self diagnosis gets a bad rep imo is because people have constructed this boogeyman of the worst case scenario, people collecting mental illnesses they dont have for attention as opposed to what it is, people doing research into their experiences and making theories on what they have so they can manage it. youll often see the take of "i dont hate self dxd i just hate people who do it for attention" and i think thats very irresponsible considering a symptom of many mental illnesses is thinking youre faking it and doing it for attention, nevermind the fact that attention seeking behaviour is literally a symptom of many mental illnesses people often dont want to empathize with. gatekeeping whos illness is real just keeps people who need help out. i could go into an anarchist screed about democratizing health, but basically, as someone whos life has been saved by my insistence on self diagnosis, and whos life has been made significantly easier by treating myself as though i have the conditions that i theorize i have, self diagnosis saves lives, and i, as an advocate for disabled people of all kinds on my island, will never put any conditionals on self diagnosis. it doesnt matter if you find the right name for your problem, it matters if you find a solution that works. i have yet to meet any of these fabled people who never try to receive a professional opinion, only people who literally cant.

as for feeling guilty, ill repeat how i opened this answer: it does not matter what exactly your problem is, it matters that you find a solution that works. in medicine generally, there will be a wide spectrum of problems with overlapping treatments, things which are similar but distinct, things which look identical but are completely different and at different levels of concern. it doesnt really matter which grab bag of bullshit your brain is reaching from, it matters that you know how to deal with what it throws at you, whatever that may be. dont worry about getting it right, worry about getting it working. okay?

for advice on how to deal with doctors, its helpful to pose it as a hypothetical as opposed to an absolute. when i bring up things im dealing with that i have a theory about i say "i think i have x" or "i think i might have x" or "i have a lot of symptoms of x". doctors are often egotistical and are easily challenged so it helps to pose it at a problem they can solve as opposed to one youve solved for them otherwise they get spooked. in my experience posing it this way leads them to actually interrogate this line of symptoms, and theyll ask you why you think that, and you can bring up symptoms that led you to that conclusion, and ones that give you trouble especially. for example, ive said "i think i may have autism or adhd? or both" to several doctors, and they either agree with me (i believe its been put in my file as a possibility now although i cant get an official test done due to financial and resource restrictions) or they ask why i think so, and i detail what i believe is due to my autism. its small, but this reframing helps a lot.

i think this covers all you said but my head is empty as hell.

[matsumi101]

Who is this Kid?

Crossdressing Fem!Reader Hamilton Insert

Secret

Description:

General Washington has been relentlessly receiving letters one after another that has been requesting two same things over and over again. It’s high time he confronts the writer directly about it, and maybe clear something that he’s been hearing around while he’s at it.

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Warnings: swearing, drinking

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Notes:

> Masterlist

> Read from the beginning.

> “F/N” means fake name and “Y/N” means your real first name

> I don’t think I warned y’all before but I wasn’t really planning on writing chronologically. I’m not sorry lmao

> Surprise Wednesday update! I’ve been reading the rb tags and the replies you guys keep leaving in my story and honestly it makes my heart go 💞 aaa ily guys sm and im glad you’re enjoying the story 🥺🥺🥺

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Taglist (if u wanna be added do tell!)

@thebitchiestnerdtowalktheearth  @cutie1365 @girlmadeofivory @i-honestly-dont-know-anymore  @takemyhand-bitch @hamiltrashqueer​

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“Hey, Juggernaut.”

You adjusted your coat before pulling your tent open. “Yo,” you greeted quietly to the soldier waiting in front of your tent. “General Washington calls for you,” he informed you. You nodded and ducked out of your tent, not wanting to wait another second to know what your superior wanted to talk about. You walked at a brisk pace, never stopping until you were now in front of the tent that was noticeably larger than the rest.

You swallowed thickly, millions of possibilities running in your head to as why you were called. A big part of you hoped that it was with regards to your plans, though there was a smaller bit of you that feared that it might be of something else. Not wanting to keep yourself on edge any further, you pushed the tent open and let yourself in.

"Your excellency, sir. You asked to see me?"

You readily saluted at the presence of not only George Washington but the aide-de-camps and officers that were with him as well. They circled a table, where a map and a few mock pieces were laid out for them to view and move around. While John and Lafayette's eyes twinkled with recognition, the others simply stared at your arrival. "Private F/N L/N?" George assumed. He motioned you to be at ease, which you silently obeyed.

"Yes, sir," you confirmed with a steady voice.

George quickly dismissed the rest of the people out of the tent, the only ones remaining were you, him, and Alexander who was busy writing something at his desk at the corner. “I’ve been reading your letters,” George began, moving to get something from his main desk. You immediately tensed as he pulled out a small stack of envelopes underneath. You kept your lips sealed, waiting for the General’s input on your requests.

“You’ve been asking to have the same thing approved for years now,” he began, “and recently, you’re asking for a rather unique position in your unit, correct?”

“Yes, sir.”

From the corner of your eyes you could see Alexander perk up slightly at the conversation. He subtly glanced up from his work, his eyes falling on George as the general picked up an open letter that had been lying on his desk. “Let’s talk about the first one,” George announced. “I’ve noticed there was a slight change with your offer.” You licked the bottom of your lips out of nervousness, fiddling with your hands behind you.

“Unfortunately, even I can’t agree to it.”

“If I may sir, why not?”

George looked up from the letter to you. “Women cannot be paid to study, son,” he explained plainly. You tilted your head the slightest, confusion from his statement evident. “Sir, I do not seek for women to be paid to be taught basic medicinal procedures,” you murmured, and that was enough for George to mirror your expression.

“That doesn’t seem to be the message I’m getting from your letter, L/N.”

You opened your mouth to counter, but when a vague memory hit you like a punch in the gut, you couldn’t help but to smack your forehead in realization. “Shit, I am so sorry,” you apologized, the annoyance woven in your voice directed to yourself more than anything. George furrowed his brows at your sudden drop of formality, noticing how you were cursing under your breath as you returned to position.

“I must’ve sent you my draft letter instead of the actual one. The pay that I mentioned in the letter refers to the pay of the nurses, not the education that I wish to be provided to them.”

Your face turned to more of an embarrassed one. “I... might’ve written this late at night so my thoughts merged while I was writing,” you confessed, looking down at the ground. “I apologize for causing a misunderstanding. Writing... has never really been my best suit.” You could feel the back of your neck heat up with embarrassment, and the blood was slowly creeping its way to your cheeks the more you dwelled on your mistake. George huffed, and you could’ve sworn there was laughter that came along with it.

“We have our own weaknesses, son,” he said. “Rewrite your statement, then I’ll have it sent to the Congress for approval. Hamilton.”

“Yes, sir?”

The called man straightened from his seat almost instantaneously. “If you’re not too busy, you can help Private L/N draft his proposal to the Congress tonight?” he requested. You looked at Alexander almost the same time he looked at you. “I take it you approve of his plans, sir?” he asked George, though it came off more of a statement than a question.

“Yes. If our nurses are given the same pay as our male doctors, or at the very least raise it, then there wouldn’t be any need for our officers to resort to... violent methods of recruiting them.”

Your jaw visibly clenched at the last few words, and George wasn’t dense to not notice it. “If we treat our camp followers properly, as we should’ve been since square one, then they wouldn’t be working out of spite or fear,” you pointed out through gritted teeth, “and by teaching them the required medical procedures to treating our wounded, then there would be more hands on our medical team without really hiring more hands.” Alexander nearly beamed at your words and hurriedly wrote something down on a spare piece of paper.

“That’s an excellent point F/N, I’ll make sure to include that in your proposal,” he announced eagerly.

You stared at Alexander with surprise while George chuckled in amusement. “Now, since we’ve cleared all misunderstandings for your first request, I take it we’re good to move on to the next one?” his voice wasn’t as light as when he brought up your first request. “Ready as I’ll ever be, sir,” you replied. George nodded, pulling a different letter.

“Private L/N, I’m sure you already know the contents of your own letters, so I will say right now that I just can’t approve you to a... what is this term you used?”

“Field medic, sir.”

“Right.”

“Field medic?”

Alexander wasn’t really supposed to be a part of the next conversation, but he couldn’t help but inquire about the strange new term he just heard. “Basically a doctor soldier tasked specifically to treat wounded men while on field and pull them out of there,” George explained, and you nodded. Alexander’s face contorted, and you sighed internally as it was the response you already expected to get from someone hearing your concept for the first time.

“I... I don’t get it,” Alexander murmured. “We can bring our men to the backlines just fine during combat, I don’t see the point of having a person to specialize in that.”

You were just about ready to explain, but then George put up his hand to stop you. “I can hand you Private L/N’s letters of proposal for later, son,” George reasoned. Alexander’s face fell, and the man buried his face back to his work. “With all due respect sir, I feel like I am fully capable of putting this concept into action. My endurance is beyond average to run around the field and carry our wounded, all I need left is some proper first-aid training.”

“And we need your endurance in the frontlines!” George retorted. “Juggernaut, you’re our best foot soldier, I cannot afford to send you to the medics.”

You nearly physically recoiled at the use of your nickname. You wore the title “Juggernaut” with pride ever since, and George knew. Your tendency to almost never use your gunpowder and instead resort to close combat was what earned you the nickname, and your commanders made sure to utilize you best for that. Simply put, your fearlessness to be up close with the redcoats was something praised by your fellow soldiers and feared by the enemy.

“Sir,” your voice dropped low. “Many men die bleeding out in the field when they could’ve lived if only someone had been there to pull them out, but the second they’re crippled they are not our standing soldiers’ priority. Moreover, many more die in the tents simply for having infected wounds that could’ve been survivable had someone treated it long before. These men have hopes of coming home to see the end of this war and what follows as much as any of us, even while they lay in their own pool of blood as the rest of the fight ensues around them. Sir, they have lives they want to go back to, too, just like us.”

When you were done talking, the air within the tent was heavy. Was it out of realization or just the sheer weight of your words, no one was quite sure, but the tension was so thick no blade could cut through it. “I can see you are as adamant in saving lives as you are taking them,” George mused, finally breaking the suffocating silence that wrapped around the three of you. He glanced down at your letter, hesitancy clear as day. Between the two of you, it was the sixth one you sent for your proposed role. For every letter of declination he gave you, you rebutted with a new letter no more than two to three days later countering his reasonings. For someone who isn’t the best at writing, you do write a lot, he thought.

“Let my hands be stained saving the blood of my allies than spilling the blood of my enemies,” you responded, quoting your own letter.

George huffed, setting down the letter. “I will... think this through for the meantime,” he announced. You resisted your mouth that nearly quirked upwards at his words; consideration was a good enough sign for you. “Thank you sir,” you breathed. George eyed you carefully, thinking if there was anything else needed to be said to you. “I suppose that will be all for now,” he decided tentatively. He dismissed you, and just after you thanked him for his time and turned around was then he remembered.

“Hold on, Private. I feel like there’s one more thing needed to be discussed.”

You looked over your shoulder, almost fearfully, as you moved away from the tent’s exit. George leaned back, crossing his arms as he looked at you with a nearly blank stare. “I feel like we should address the secret circulating around you,” he pointed out. Your jaw dropped to the floor, a chill striking you from the feet up. A hand flew over your arm as goosebumps riddled your limbs, and you feared the worst.

“What secret, sir?” you asked, your voice nearly returning to normal with panic.

“Juggernaut, I don’t think we need to beat around the bush over this. Other soldiers have seen it, too, and you need to come clean with it.”

Other soldiers? The thought was everything but comforting. You always thought you had been discreet with your identity, but apparently you weren’t based on the General’s accusations. However, you kept your mind straight enough to keep droning on. Maybe it was just a mistake, maybe it was just a false rumor that was meant to drag you in the dirt. Yeah, maybe that’s it. You desperately wished that was it.

“It must be a mistake, sir. Whatever this secret may be must be just a measly rumor to throw me off,” you tried to reason out.

“Would it be considered a rumor if we have a witness?”

Your stomach dropped. So there are people who saw? That was definitely not right. You were always sure to have your corset on, only taking it off inside the tent, and whenever you bathe you made sure you were either alone or the last one out and never surfacing from the water. George glanced over to Alexander expectantly, and for the first time the secretary seemed to not want to partake in the conversation.

“Hamilton here has your verbatim.”

You could feel your palms turn sweatier as the seconds passed. You steadied your breathing, trying to calm yourself and stay reasonable. Alexander stared at George incredulously, as if he was the one who’d been ratted out by their superior. He looked over to you, and despite your seemingly calm stature there was nervousness in your eyes that spoke otherwise. Not wanting to lie, Alexander nodded almost apologetically to confirm. You felt your shoulders sag. Had you been too lax when you discussed about pretending with other disguised women? Or had you been too loud when you were rambling to yourself in your own tent? You feared what was next to follow, but if there was someone who bore evidence of your secret, then it was better for you to speak the truth.

“I apologize for deceiving you, sir,” you conceded, dropping your head. “I am more than willing to accept the punishment for my actions.”

“Funny, I figured you’d know enough the consequences of having more liquor than the daily rations you’re given.”

“Wh... what...?”

You tried to wrap your head around the new information. Liquor... daily rations... was that what General George Washington accusing you of this whole time? “Or is the excess whiskey your secret to your fearlessness after all?” George mused teasingly, and you shot up straight when it finally registered to you. “No sir, that would be my low sense of self-preservation,” you answered hurriedly, jokingly. Thankfully for you, George chuckled at your banter.

“Well, don’t think of dying too early, young man,” George advised lightheartedly.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, sir.”

The tight feeling that was mentally suffocating you the whole time released your entire being. “Though, if it’s any assurance, my stash of vodka hasn’t really been consumed,” you informed. “If anything, I think the only time I made use of it was when I disinfected someone’s wound.” George sat up straight, a curious look flashing in his eyes.

“Is that so?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Who’d you heal?”

You paused, wondering if you should really say. “It was Lieutenant Colonel John Laurens.” You glanced up, noticing the inquisitive look both George and Alexander held. “If it’s any compensation for my troubles, I can offer some of my personal beverage. Surely, you’d like a shot,” you then offered, swiftly dodging the questions that might’ve followed your prior statement.

“And how will I know this is not a ploy to try on my good side, son?”

“Was I on your bad side this whole time, sir?”

“With the direction your letters were going, you might be at the tipping point of being so with the Congress.”

You laughed uneasily. “Rest assured sir, my offer is all in good faith.” George uncovered the mug that rested on the edge of his table, and you took that as the sign to approach. You pulled out your flask, which had been refilled from the much larger bottle that you were hiding in your tent (you wondered if someone that visited your tent before saw the bottle which led to the accusations), and poured a hefty amount into the mug, much to George’s pleasure. You waved to Alexander with the flask. “Do you want some too, Hamilton?” you asked him. Alexander stared at your flask, then to George, and then to his papers.

“Come on, son. It’s not everyday we have a little extra liquor,” George insisted, a welcoming smile on his face.

Alexander didn’t hesitate to come over to the table the second he got George’s approval. He brought his own cup, and you readily poured him almost the same amount as George. “Thanks, I needed this,” he sighed gratefully, the strong scent already wafting through his nose. The three of you shared a toast, and you took a nice, long swig from your flask. A satisfied growl emitted from each of you, the burning sensation running down your throat.

“Well sir, I should head out now,” you said quietly.

George nodded, and finally dismissed you. “Call the others back on your way out,” he ordered, and you gave a verbal confirmation before pushing one of the tent flaps open. You peered outside and saw that Lafayette and John were talking nearby. You headed to them, waving a hand to catch their attention.

“F/N! The General didn’t chew you out too much, I hope?” John teased.

You rolled your eyes. “Well, I got out alive,” you joked. “The General requests you guys and the other officials to return, by the way.” John chuckled, patting your shoulder as he passed by. Lafayette ruffled your hair before he and John headed out to look for the other officials that dispersed in the camp. You sighed and walked back to your tent, the clashing sensation of relief and anxiousness washing over you.

Your secret was safe... for now.

[thorne93]

Inside the Criminal Mind (Part 37)

Prompt: You’re married to Dr. Spencer Reid of the BAU, and are a distinguished doctor yourself on the team. You’re sent down to Miami, Florida for teaching and as a side request from the FBI, to investigate a string of missing persons. When you think you’ve figured out who the unsub is, your life becomes more complicated than you ever could’ve imagined.

Word Count: 2604

Warnings: (throughout the fic –>) death, blood, gore, killings, language, disturbing mental notions, mentions of rapes/murder/etc (You know, Dexter and Criminal Minds related business)

Notes: Thank you so much to @arrow-guy​​​​​​​​, @carryonmyswansong​​​​​​​​, and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​​​​ - without each of you, I couldn’t have finished, written, or properly navigated this story. Each of you helped me fish out details that were incredibly important to me. Beta’d by @carryonmyswansong​​​​​​​​ and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​​​​… Aesthetic by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​​​​

This is a crossover of Criminal Minds x Dexter. First time writing Dexter.

Also, the timeline is after Season 1 of Dexter, but during season 14-ish of Criminal minds into Season 15. Enjoy!!!

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You watched your husband and Cat put on skates and go out to the rink and for a long while they just skated, saying nothing. Spencer couldn't skate at all, and Cat was skating all over the place. She caught up to him and held onto his arm to help him skate and you watched from the side with burning in your eyes and stomach. 

It’s a very good thing Dexter taught you to keep your emotions in check. You’d been here before though. Jealous. First with JJ, and it took a long time for s Spencer to convince you there was nothing there. Then with Max, and that had yet to be addressed, and now, a psychotic killer was wheeling your husband around a rink and he was actually smiling.  

Why is it when Cat Adams takes him on a random date, he can smile and have fun, knowing the hell she put him through. But you and him were at each other’s throats for months when he found out you were a killer. You were his wife. The love for you should’ve shone through everything else. 

So what was the difference? Could he not forgive you for the lying? You knew he was jealous of Dexter but now… Now he’d had three women that made you question your entire marriage in the course of half a year. You had been nothing but open and honest about your entire relationship with Dexter since he found out.

Did he really not see how any of this would affect you? The constant attention given to max/ The slight flirting he was doing with Cat? He didn’t have to flirt. Cat knew it, you knew it, Spencer knew it. He just had to play the game -- he didn’t have to enjoy it. 

Cat mentioned that if you weren’t here, she’d request a song from the DJ and make out with Spencer right now. They skated some more and she acknowledged that Spencer would try to get inside her head, so he asked about her baby. She said she didn’t want to talk about it. He said he was trying to use the hormonal effect against her. 

“Oh, really? Um, waht about sex?” She skated towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck, he wrapped his hands around her waist, and you stiffened. “Why don’t you use that against me?” 

Real date or not, it’s never a pretty sight to see your husband that close to another woman. 

She slightly pushed away from him and he had trouble staying upright. She made a face of disgust and slapped him so hard that he fell over. 

Your eyes went wide with rage. She skated over to where you were, trying to skate past you, but you grabbed her hand in a swift motion, almost too fast for anyone to see and you bent her hand backwards, threatening to break her wrist.

“If you ever touch my husband again, I will kill you. And my method won’t be as humane as a needle in the arm,”  you darkly vowed as she bent backwards, wincing. “Are we clear?”

“Jeez, you weren’t this jealous last time,” she responded.

In the background, you could hear Spencer and Luke shouting your name. 

“Y/N! Y/N!” Spencer cried out, skating towards you.

You applied more pressure, any more and her wrist would fracture. She was nearly on one knee by now from the way you were pushing. 

“Are we clear?” you asked again. 

“Yes!” 

You released her and stood straight up again as Spencer skated over to you. He gave you a look of anger but you returned it to him. 

He spent the next few minutes talking to her, telling her how he couldn’t get her out of his mind and you wanted to roll your eyes. She asked if Spencer thought about her when he kissed you and he said sometimes. The next thing she wanted was to see where you two lived so blissfully happily. 

So, within a matter of seconds, everyone was loaded up into the SWAT van and everyone went over to your home. Spencer got out his keys and started to unlock the door before she stopped him.

“Did you really mean what you said?” she asked. 

“”Yes.” 

“Prove it,” she ordered and you just rolled your eyes. He’d refuse. You knew he would. 

But faster than you could blink, Spencer’s hands went to her hair and his mouth collided with hers. Your eyes went wide in shock as your stomach dropped. Fake or not, your husband was kissing another woman, in front of you, on your porch. He was kissing her hungrily, in a way he hadn’t kissed you in a long time. 

Luke glanced at you, gauging your reaction, seeing as just a few minutes ago you nearly broke her wrist and threatened to end her life. You couldn’t watch, but you couldn’t look away. 

She swung your front door open to reveal a woman in your house and you frowned. 

What the hell was this?

Spencer and Cat broke apart and you looked at them, then looked at the girl. 

“Max, what are you doing here?” Spencer breathed.

Of course it was fucking Max inside your house. Of course this day was going to get worse and worse. 

Luke ordered that someone get Max out of here but Max said, “No, no, no, she’ll kill them if I leave.”

“Kill who?” you asked as you stepped inside the foyer of your home. 

“My father and my sister. Look I got a call from some woman with my sister screaming in the background. I was told to come here, that there would be a key taped underneath the porch swing. Spencer, what is happening?!””

“We recovered your father, but your sister is still missing. Look I say we put cat in her cell and we regroup,” Luke suggested

“No. Bring her in here and leave us alone,” Spencer quietly ordered. He then set it up so that the team would hear all of you the entire time, instructed Max on what not to say, and they let Cat come back in. 

Fantastic. You were in your home with a woman that was monopolizing your husband’s time and a psychotic killer that was obsessed with him. 

“We’re all here, what do you want to talk about?” Spencer demanded as she walked in. 

“So, so much.” She eyed Max and said, “She’s cute. I see why she turned your head away from your wife.” 

“What are you talking about?” Spencer asked as she walked in your home, touching things and looking at the art and decor. 

“You’re married?” Max asked as if she didn’t know and your face whipped to Spencer. You were dying to know why that would be a bit of news to Max. 

Finally, she stopped walking and turned to you. “Did it make you mad that I was kissing your husband?” 

“No.” 

“Why not? You nearly broke my arm for slapping him. Is he free real estate? Speaking of which, he kissed me, so you can’t kill me.” 

“No, but I’d hope you’re not stupid enough to think the kiss was real.” You cocked your head. 

“Are you going to hurt my sister?” Max suddenly asked, taking a step forward

“No. Not if she follows instructions. It could be a learning experience for her.” After a moment, everyone got settled in in your living room. “Normally Spencie and I, we play games, but tonight, I’ve brought you all here to make a point. Y/N, you should know the truth about your husband.” 

“I already know everything there is to know about my husband,” you evenly said. 

“Oh, really? Did you get the mail today?” 

“Yes, why?” 

“Go check your mail.”

You got up and looked and found an envelope that was addressed your name, but no address or return address.  

“Open it,” Cat ordered. 

You peered at her, wondering what the game was. You opened it, and a stack full of photos came out. One was a picture of Spencer carrying Max through a sprinkler system at the park. Another was the two of them laughing over coffee. Another was her hand on his in a booth at a restaurant. 

“So? I knew they were spending time together,” you asked, throwing the photos on the coffee table as you looked down at Cat. 

“You knew how much, but you didn’t know how. Does that look friendly to you or flirty? Not to mention Max here didn’t even know he was married. Hid the wedding ring and then never mentioned you. How does that make you feel?” she pressed. 

“Fine. That doesn’t mean anything. I never came up. He tries to avoid talking about work, and I’m part of his work.”

“Don’t be blind, Y/N, you’ve never been stupid, dont’ start nowy. It’s not a cute look. Not mentioning his work is one thing, but you, his wife? Hmm, it appears our spencie has been a naughty boy.” 

“He isn’t ‘our’ anything.”

“Sure he is. Just because I didn’t get a picture of him kissing Max over here doesn't mean it hasn’t happened or that it won’t. He kissed me without hesitation to save her family.”

“He did that to save two people, it doesn’t matter who they are.” 

“But it does. See, I know the real Dr. Reid. He’s not this bookish genius that saves the day and has all the answers.”

“Oh, yeah? Who’s the real me, Cat?” Spencer prompted. 

“The real Spencer Reid throws women against walls, and hisses that he’s going to kill them,” Cat said. 

“That was a very different situation,” Spencer said. 

“No it wasn’t.” 

“What’s she talking about?” Max asked. 

“Why don’t you explain it? She won’t believe it coming from me,” Cat said. 

“Two years ago Cat kidnapped my mother. Just like tonight, she got under my skin, and--.”

“You threw her against a wall?” Max asked, clearly appalled. 

“Don’t skimp on the details, Spencie,” Cat instructed as she paced around. “She should  know everything, as your mistress.” 

“I’m not his mistress,” Max responded. 

“She was pregnant at the time, and I knew that when I hurt her.” 

“And, the next day, I miscarried. The end.” 

“That’s not true,” Spencer retorted quickly, a look of concern washing over him. 

Oh, he was concerned Cat miscarried, but not about him committing infidelity. Nice to know where you stood. 

“It most certainly is true. Check my medical records. So now you both see. Max, you see that Dr. Reid is actually a lot darker than you thought. He’s married, he’s a liar, and a cheat--”

“I never cheated,” Spencer corrected quickly.

“No, but you thought about it and you didn’t think twice about kissing me to prove a point.” 

“What is this?” Max asked, jumping up. “What is this sick twisted game you three are playing?” 

“Okay, fine,” you said, your voice hard. “You want to break up my marriage with vague photos, fine, but why take Max’s family. What do they have to do with this?”

“Because I want to show everyone what happens if you involve yourself with Spencer Reid. See, Maxine here should know that this is what life is like for anyone who knows him.”

“So why not abduct me?” you challenged. 

“You’re already married, it’s too late to show you anything new, except what he’s done with Max here. You should be thanking me, Y/N. No woman will want to get near Dr. Reid.”

“Thanking you? You’ve put two innocent people's lives in danger,” you responded, your teeth gritting together. 

“You’re being very ungrateful. I’m saving Maxie from the inevitable danger she’ll get in with Spencie and I’m trying to show you that he’s just like every other scumbag guy out there. He’s out for himself and that’s it.” 

“I can't believe you didn’t tell me you were married,” Max responded, clearly upset and now you realized you had a reason to be too. What had they done that would cause concern for being around a married man? 

“See? Men are pigs,” Cat spat as she kneeled in front of Max. “You’ve been hurt before like this. Been the other woman. Tell me about it. I could have little sis and Juliette go over to his place and take care of him.” 

“Just give her what she wants,” Spencer encouraged. 

“He’s just saying that so I’ll call and they can trace it.” 

Max jumped up, ended the landline phone call that was keeping the team in contact, and begged Cat to get confirmation her sister was alive. But Cat insisted on a name and a story first. So Maxine started in on a story about a man she knew that made her feel special, made her feel like she was on top of the world, only to find out he was married with two kids. So when she confronted him, he got violent, and she hit him over the head with a vase that killed him. She told 911 it was self defense, but she went there looking for a fight, a way to hurt him. 

Cat entered the phone number, the text, and everyone waited on confirmation that her sister was alive. She said, “See? There, now everyone is miserable. Maxine is right back to being the other woman. Spencer has broken two women’s hearts. Better than their neck though, right Spencie? And Y/N sees her husband as the cheating, lying, psycho he is. I mean, in one night, we’ve determined he could kiss me easily, on your front porch no less, and with Maxine here…” She shook her head before looking down. “Oh look. Proof sis is alive.” 

Maxine grabbed the phone and dashed out of your house and showed your team the photo. You and Spencer didn’t speak as Cat was reloaded into the SWAT van and you drove to the prison. 

“Do you know why I did this? Why I really did this?” Cat asked. 

“To prove I’m a monster, just like you,” Spencer said, his eyes meeting yours from across the van. 

“No, silly,” Cat retorted before resting her head on his shoulder. “I just wanted to see you again.”

Your eyes flashed with pain and heartbreak as you stared at her. 

“You ruined my marriage and the only friendship I’ve had in a long time, just to see me? You could’ve just written me a letter.”

“Would you have written back?” she asked. 

He didn’t respond and the rest of the ride was silent until you reached the prison. They oepned the doors, and began to unload Cat. 

“You know, just because those pictures didn’t show Spencer kissing Max, it doesn’t mean he wasn’t cheating,” Cat said as she got out of the van. 

You frowned as you said, “What do you mean? Of course it does. If you couldn’t get one picture of them being physical--”

“Don’t forget who your husband is, Y/N. His love language isn’t physicality. It’s books...poems...museums… He’s a lover of the mind. You might want to ask Maxine just how many gifts she got from Spencie here.” She glanced at Spencer before looking to you again. “It’s been a real pleasure. It’s too bad I won’t be there to see the divorce finalize. Best date ever.” She gave you her signature crazy look, and then they walked her away. 

It was only you and Spencer in the back of the SWAT van now. 

“Y/N,” he started softly. 

“Don’t,” you warned through gritted teeth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[strayficks]

EPHEMERAL 2 • JAEHYUN

Tysm for anons who had given me ideas!! and my asks is always open, feedback would be greatly appreciated ✊🥺💝

Part(s): 1 . 2 . 3

Genre: smut ✌

Pairings: bad boy!Jung Jaehyun × fem reader.

Jaehyun couldnt stop thinking about her. When Mark asked him what he was doing that night, he didnt say anything. He stayed vague and silent about it.

Maybe it’s the fact that he wants her to himself, or the fact that he always gets turned on everytime he thinks of her. Either way, Jaehyun found her interesting. When she left Jaehyun alone at the park, he watched her leave with nothing but confusion on his mind. Still, Jaehyun doesnt know her name yet.

He asked about her to Yukhei, he’s the last person Jaehyun trusted about telling things about her, but he’s the only person that knows about these things. To no avail, Yukhei doesnt recognize her. Jaehyun tried to describe her as best as possible. ‘Like.. this tall, she smokes, bold as fuck. Are you sure you dont know her?’ Jaehyun had asked Yukhei.

Yukhei stayed silent when he asked it, but when Yukhei asked him if she has her nose pierced, Jaehyun was esctatic. ‘Yeah, she’s my friend’s friend. Dont know her name. You definitely have a type, man.’ Does Jaehyun really? He had been on a couple relationships, but her? He had never met someone like her. So fascinating, so.. brave and alluring.

He cant stop thinking about her since she sucked him off at the park, sure, the sex was a bonus and all, but he’s hooked. Adamant on finding her again. But Jaehyun doesnt know what he’s going to do if he did meet her again. Probably have a nice little talk, or fuck her again until she came. The words rung in his head. ‘No’ she had said.

Jaehyun knew that was a lie the moment it came out her mouth. He rembered her legs being wobbly after he was out of her, the way her cunt tightened around his cock the same time he came. She’s a tease it seems. So when Yukhei told Jaehyun that there’s a party going on on friday, mentioning that his friend will come and the possibility that the pierced girl tag along, he was more than eager to meet her again.

“Fuck no!”

“Fuck yes! Look at yourselves.”

Jihyo rolled her eyes at your response. Your dress was the least conservative out of the group, even though it hugged every inch of your body as if it were a second skin, the girlsbdresses, however, consisted of much less fabric than yours. Ryunjin’s pink slip dress hugs her ass so well, and Jihyo’s little red number exposed so much cleavage you thought you were going to go blind if you stared too long.

Though they were barely covered, you had strange feeling that plenty of other girls at the party would be wearing much less.

The drive to the house was short, but the crowd to get into it went down the block and wrapped around the corner. There were a few cries as the the three of you entered the room. All eyes were on the three, well, mainly you and you know it. Some gazes are filled with lust and admiration, some filled with envy and jealousy. People dont affect you. In fact, their stares and whispers only made you more confident. You pulled your most charming smile, raised your chin and swayed your hips as you walked.

“I should’ve plucked your eyebrows if i knew this much people stare at you on a daily basis, Y/N.” Ryunjin snickered beside you as she nudged her shoulders with yours.

You fake a pained expression as you put a hand on your chest.

“How dare you! My eyebrows are better untouched!”

You felt Jihyo’s delicate hand squeeze your arm as she looked to a spot, a look on her face as she opened her mouth to speak.

“Fucking hell. It’s Hyunjin.”

That was when you saw him. Maybe you were hallucinating, but standing less than fifteen feet away with his arm around some random brunette and his eyes locked on you was the last person you wanted to see.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t Jung Jaehyun like you hoped. You stood frozen as you watched Hwang Hyunjin shove the girl away, not noticing the dirty look you gave him in response. Even if he had noticed, he probably wouldn’t have cared. It wasn’t like he had a heart. Hyunjin had been the main reason behind your sudden change of look, your ‘bad girl’ nature.

Your one year of involvement with him had resulted in you being arrested for various crimes, nearly being expelled from yet another school, losing your virginity in the backseat of his Jeep, and ultimately getting your heart shattered when you found him sleeping with your supposed best friend. To put it lightly, Hwang Hyunjin had kind of ruined your life, and now here he was.

Dont get it wrong. You changed because you wanted to. You realized that you need to change, and you did. You turned into a butterfly and you were free without him. If you hadn’t dated him, you wouldnt be the person you are now, and somehow you were thankful. Because without him, you wouldnt be able to grow up and snap out of the fantasy that you dreamed of.

“At least i look fucking hot tonight.” You said nonchalantly, “Gonna get a drink, be right back.”

Every muscle in Jaehyun’s body seemed to relax upon entering the core of the party, realizing that maybe this was just what he needed.

Yuta noticed the change in mood and clapped a hand on his friend’s back before leading him over to get some drinks. For a long while the duo chatted and drank as they observed the guests who had made an appearance. He took a moment to admire the girls all around them, smirking as his eyes drifted over their bare limbs and glistening skin, but Yuta seemed to be too preoccupied staring at two to even notice the other girls that Jaehyun pointed out.

“Damn,” Yuta murmured. “Those two get hotter every day.”

Jaehyun laughed. “Having fantasies about the those two again, Yuta?”

“How could I not? Doesn’t every guy fantasize about having a threesome?”

“Not really my thing.” Still, he gave Yuta a hard slap on the back.

“But if it’s yours…” Yuta’s grin was brilliant in the darkness

“Hell yes it is.” Soon he was shoving his half-full drink into Jaehyun’s hand and pushing away from the bar.

“If things go according to plan, don’t expect to see me for the rest of the night.” Considering the challenge, Jaehyun expected to see his friend back here in no time. Still, he wasn’t about to sit all night.

Decision made, Jeahyun stepped away from the safety of the bar and made his way into the crowd. It took a few moments to find a decent looking girl in a midriff-baring top, but soon he was pulling her close and joining the writhing mass of movement.

Sadly, it didn’t take long before he was bored again. He gently released the girl on his arm and threaded his way through the crowd again, searching for something a little more entertaining, but the passage of another twenty minutes and a handful of girls left him disappointed.

‘Where is she?’ He muttered to himself. As if on cue, Jaehyun was startled when Yukhei’s hand landed on his shoulder.

“That girl you were looking for? She’s here. Her friends told me just now.” He said, nodding to the two girls chatting with Yuta.

Jaehyun’s heart leaped when he saw her. How he hadn’t noticed the girl before was mystery, but now he couldn’t seem to tear his gaze away. She was leaning against the far wall of the room, a drink in her hand and pure boredom plastered across her face. Her dress clung to her figure in all the right places. It wasn’t until she met his gaze that Jaehyun realized how long he had been staring, still attempting to place her.

Part of him was tempted to look away and pretend like he’d never seen her, but she glanced away before he could even try. He watched as she smirked and passed her empty drink off to nearby partygoer, and had to wonder if it was him she’d been looking at in the first place.

However, those doubts quickly faded when she began moving in his direction. Jaehyun took a hesitant step forward, but even that small shift had caused him to lose her in the crowd. It didn’t help that a new group of girls had surrounded him, each pressing themselves against him in half-assed hugs. He barely avoided being snagged by one of the girls’ black talons as he turned in the opposite direction, praying he’d be able to escape them unscathed.

Unfortunately, the move caused him to bump straight into a pissed-off Hwang Hyunjin

“Watch where you’re going, asshole,” Hyunjin snarled, that hideous lip-piercing glinting under the lights. In an instant Jaehyun’s mood went from vaguely content to sour, all because this sorry excuse for a human decided to open his mouth. So instead of letting him pass, Jaehyun squared his shoulders and stood his ground.

“I think you should leave,” he said, nodding towards the exit Hyunjin’s lips twitched into a sneer.

“Excuse me?”

“Just get the fuck out the party.”

“I’m not leaving,” Hyunjin replied, hitching his chin up in defiance.

“Not until my ex-girlfriend explains why she’s h-”

“I don’t give a damn about you, Hwang,” Jaehyun finally exploded, all traces of patience fleeing.

“Either you walk out that door right now and keep your dignity, or I call the boys and have them throw you out. Your choice.”

Hyunjin’s eyes flitted to something Jaehyun’s shoulder, but he didn’t take the bait to see what had captured Hyunjin’s attention. Instead he waited until the other boy scowled and turned sharply on his heel, stalking towards the exit.

A glance to his left revealed the girl he’d been staring at earlier dancing as if no one was watching with her arms high above her head as her hips swayed to the beat. It didn’t take much to convince himself to go over to her, hoping she could make his night better.

A few steps brought Jaehyun up behind her and he settled a hand on her waist, letting the other drift down to her hips. The girl glanced over her shoulder, offering Jaehyun a slow, unsurprised smile that made his stomach twist into knots.

“You showed him,” she teased, obviously referring to his run in with Hyunjin, her head falling back onto his shoulder He could smell the alcohol on her breath, but her softly drawled words brought a smile to his lips

“You came, you never told me you knew Yukhei.” he murmured, pulling her closer as the heavy bass line resounded in his chest.

Her response caused him to flirt with the notion that this could be Hyunjin’s ex-girlfriend, but the fact that her hips were now grinding against his own made any other concern that didn’t involve getting her into bed disappeared. Jaehyun lost track of time while they dancing.

The music was good, company, and the fact that they’d hardly exchanged any words was even better. The passage of what seemed like an eternity had brought and now jaehyun was finding it hard to move without stumbling or bumping into a neighboring person.

But seemed like the girl having the same problem. He was practically the only thing keeping her from going down in those heels, his arm wrapped possessively around her waist as her hips pressed hard against his.

“Come home with me,” Jaehyun whispered against her ear, hands sliding down her hips. The girl leaned back just enough to meet his eye.

“Why should I?”

“Because you want this as much as I do- and i want to make you cum.”

His hands were on her thighs now, fingers inching up under the material of her dress. It only took her a moment, but she grabbed his hand and smiled, taking a shaky step backward as she tugged on his hand.

“Then let’s go.” Hand in hand they stumbled out of the house and onto the sidewalk, her giggles echoing down the busy street.

When she realized she had no idea where she was going, Jaehyun took the lead and guided her another block or so down the street to the dormitory. Jaehyun felt her hand slip out of his once they were alone, before he even thought to question it, her mouth was on his and there was no more time for words. A shiver rolled down his spine as she pressed herself against him. The door slammed shut with enough force to shake the room as they staggered towards the bed, his fingers finally managing to snag the minuscule zipper of her dress and yank it down, though much to his chagrin it didn’t instantly pool at her feet.

Her throaty chuckle made it obvious that she was well aware of his annoyance, and the fact that she was doing nothing to help him out only made it worse.

Before he could even think to voice his displeasure, her lips were on his and they were suddenly falling onto the bed, soft pillows absorbing the shock of the fall.

Even though the actual impact hadn’t hurt, something sharp had scraped his cheek, and Jaehyun turned his head to break the kiss, swatting her hands away, he reached up to touch the small cut on his face, startled when he drew back to find blood on his fingers.

His eyes darted up to the girl straddling him, but her gaze was trained on the red-specked spiked ring on her finger. It took her a moment to put two and two together, but a sheepish grin spread over her face when she realized her jewelry had been the culprit.

“Sorry,” she murmured insincerely, slipping the ring off her finger and tossing it to the side as if it were a mere toy.

“Let me make it up to you.”

You met Jaehyun again. You were surprised but surely not disappointed. You chuckle to yourself, remembering Hyunjin’s face after he was kicked out by Jaehyun. You slid your bra off and exposed your breasts to him, you felt him slowly slide his hands up your waist, sending shivers through your body, until his hands cupped both your mounds. His eyes were completely trained on your peaks, watching them like they were more valuable than anything in the world.

“So you know Yukhei?” Without replying to your question, he leaned in and sucked one nipple into his mouth, causing you to gasp and arch your back. He flicked his tongue slowly against it, torturing you

“God,” you moaned, curling your toes when his teeth taunted your hard nipple, sharply biting into it, causing a zing of delicious pain to shoot through you.

“Ah, Jae..”

The flick of his tongue and the squeeze of his palm made moisture flow to your core and soak your already soaking panties. Beneath you, you could feel his erection growing, pressing against said core, almost as if it knew where it wanted to go all by itself. The suspense was killing you.

“Jaehyun,” you moaned again when he switched to your other breast, giving it the same amount of attention with his and teeth. Finally pulling away from you, kneeling above you as Jaehyun looked down at your underwear.

“Fuck, youre gorgeous,” He noted in a deep, aroused voice. His eyes lustfully trailed over your figure, your skin, down to the spot between your legs. You felt scorched.

“But I think I’m going to need to take it off you.”

“Only if you take off those, too,” you rebuffed and eyed his briefs where behind the cotton. You could see a very large bulge making a tent out of the fabric.

“Fair trade,” He said and then split his mouth into a panty dissolving smirk, before he begun tugging at his briefs.

You begun working on your panties as well, but had to stop when he stepped off the bed to discard his briefs, allowing your full view of his-ahem ‘Cock.’ Heart beating rapidly, you couldn’t help but stare. He was thick and gloriously erect, the head of him glistening with precum.

The heavy sac underneath was what thoroughly finished him off as being the biggest you had ever seen, you havent taken a good look when you first had sex with him at the park, but seeing him now, damn, He has such a beautiful cock.

You deftly stepped out of your panties and then walked up to Jaehyun again. You were now completely naked. His hands came around your legs and smoothed their way up to the rounds of your ass.

He cupped your butt like two delicious, juicy fruits and then squeezed them hard, causing a moan to rip from your throat. You grasped onto his shoulders for support and then let out a startled squeak when he ceased you and hurled you around on the bed. You landed flat on her back, and not one moment later, Jaehyun was on you.

“Jae, oh shit!” You gasped and then cried out a moan when he parted your legs and buried his face in your cunt.

A small scream rippled from your throat and you desperately clutched onto his shoulders as Jaehyun pushed his tongue into your core and made your stomach pool with heat. All your nerve endings seemed to meet when he moved up to your clit and flicked the sensitive bud before sucking it into his mouth, rolling it in between his teeth.

He lapped up all your juices while all you could do was writhe, scream, and pray that the sex-gods would show you mercy tonight, because this is going to be a wild one.

He suddenly flung your legs over his broad shoulders as you hazily opened your eyes from the ecstacy. The sound of the foil being ripped can be heard as he positioned himself in front of your entrance.

“You said you didnt cum? I wont hold back this time.” He stated. automatically cinching hips. His mouth found yours again, dominating you once more. She gripped onto his shoulders, dragging your fingers up through his hair.

And then in a wild thrust, he was inside you. You cried out, Jaehyun ramming into you hard and repeatedly. You hung onto him, your lips parting in hitched breaths. You clawed your nails down his chest, just like his teeth bit into your neck.

“Fuck, Jaehyun!” You hollered, throwing your head back, you couldn’t control your movements. He was hitting you so good, exploding stars started decorating your vision.

He felt so deep and so perfectly, long and thick inside you.His aggressiveness had you pining for him. Hard was the only way you wanted it. For now, anyway. Both your mouths found each other again and Jaehyun savored every part of you, the fast, furious strokes of his cock inside you quick. You could feel herself get close, you manage to corak out, letting him know what he’s doing to you.

“Jae… fuck, almost there, yes, oh fuck, yeeeees!” Jaehyun pounded into you grunting while you dipped your head deeper into his bed. Even then, high, pitchy sounds kept coming out of your mouth in short breaths as he fucked you into oblivion.

His fingers drilled into you breast, leaving more bruises as his hips and strokes finally pushed him over the edge well, joining you in your climax, his bldy going rigid as you felt the muted splurts of his cum inside you.

“Hey…maybe we can go get coffee sometime?” he offered, simply just trying to catch his breath. Sweat and bite marks covered both your bodies, scratches down Jaehyun’s back as well.

“I have to get back to my friends, they’re probably looking for me.” You said gruffly, an excuse just flung put of your mouth. Picking up your discarded clothing on the floor. Your voice was unattached, like you wanted it.

“Wait- at least tell me your name.” You pulled away from him, forcing him to let go of you. You then quickly put on your bra and dress, palming you panties in your hand while Jaehyun simply just stood there, trying to comprehend what just happened. You then ran a hand through your hair, straightening it, not regarding him with a look, for some reason. You looked like you were going to leave without saying anything at all. Jaehyun frowned.

“Wha- why…” The words froze on his tongue when your eyes met his. You quickly gave your panties to his open palm, covering it with yours as he grasped it tightly, a coy smirk on his plumb lips, the scratch on his cheek still apparent.

“It’s Y/N, I’ll see you around.” And then you stepped around him and slipped out of the room. Closing the door behind you.

[ambulatoryhoodie]

I’m trying to combine some of all the aspects of Beetlejuice media into a coherent algimation. For my own fic verse

So, long post, I can’t put a read more on mobile

Juno is Beetlejuices birth mom, she put him in foster care as soon as he was born.

Nat and Bea wanted to adopt him, even if he was a right troublemaker they still loved him and had raised him since infancy.

Around 8years or so the adoption papers wound up on Juno’s desk. She regained custody of him, pulled him out of regular schooling and made him work in the catacomb like offices.

She made his life hell, he never had any contact with Nat and Bea after that. She wasn’t physically abusive but she used her affection as a tool to make Beetlejuice do as told

Other office workers were physically abusive towards him but telling Juno just made things worse

Beetlejuice is a lot older that Miss Argentina but she’s like a mother figure to him.

Beetlejuice is emotionally stunted. He’s also extremely immature, either because he never learned better or actually went insane a long time ago.

He loves the hell out of Miss A, but would never say it outloud afraid Juno might put her down in the filing dungeon

He worked down there for a century, it was a never ending unorganized mess. On account of people always dying and all. He learned a lot about random people reading their files and can really spook some Neitherworld denizens by knowing every fact about them.

I’m calling it the Neitherworld not netherworld

The whole system is being computerized after Juno’s death.

After purposely fucking up continuously Juno banishes a Beetlejuice to the world of the living. And puts a name curse on him.

Events follow like the musical. But beetlejuice is more of a creepy haunting before he finds out Lydia can see him. The ‘wedding’ is way less creepy and Lydia is on board from the get go. It’s just a green card thing and she gets to be an honorary dead girl so she can freely travel to the Neitherworld to look for her mom.

They just can’t go through with it without a legal gardian signing a document. Juno stabs Beetlejuice and banishes him instead of Lydia stabbing him. Juno still gets eaten by a sandworm. But it’s Barbra and Beetlejuice who ride it into the living room.

beej is crazy good at writing up contracts and sometimes helps out Charles with his new business contracts. Beej can be scummy in them so Chuck always makes sure they aren’t too scummy.

Also, Chuck isn’t cowardly. He is easy to jump scare though.

Delia shows basically no reaction to any pranks. She laughs them off and sometimes gets Beej and the Maitlands to do creepy messed up poses and shapes so she can paint them.

Barbra is her favorite muse

Adam is really into miniatures

Charles bought the Maitland hardware store and a ‘sorry we almost exorcised you’ gift.

Adam still technically runs it and Lydia works there after school.

Delia has taught Barbra sculpting, and she likes it way better than pottery.

Ginger looks like a regular spider (her face bothers me in the cartoon) she’s redder, think red kneed tarantula, than in the cartoon and wears a pink tailcoat and top hat. Still tap dances but knows a lot of other dance styles too. She works as back up dancer but hopes to one day have her own show or dance studio

Jacques LaLean runs a gym in downtown, has a better less fake French accent.

Both rent from Beetlejuice who owns the roadhouse. He is actually a fair landlord and fixes things quickly.

Beetlejuice is still a slob in his own appartment. And kind of a hoarder.

The only thing organized are the books and documents wich are emacculant.

Beej enjoys reading but has some trouble actually reading and gets embarrassed when he pronounces something wrong. It takes him ages to finish a book.

Beej is Adhd hardcore. And on the autisic spectrum. Delia, Barbra, Adam, and Lydia are the only ones that know.

Most Neitherworld denizens hate Beetlejuice on priniciple, thinking he’d be like Juno. They quickly learn to hate him for other reasons.

He’s still a jerk but more prankster trickster than outright murderer. Thinks all problems can and should be solved with violence

Lydia is a little on the fence about this, on one hand she thinks some things can be talked out. On the other she totally agrees that guy needed a guilla monster set on him.

Doomie exists, and Lydia can summon him to the living world by clicking his car fob.

Lydia and Beej carry around compact mirrors to talk to each other anytime.

Clare is still a snobbish airhead. More of the school like her though and avoid the new kid Lydia.

Prudence and Bertha are still school friends with Lydia on account of thier shared social pariah status

Lydia dyes her hair black, it’s naturally blonde.

Adam and Barbra make frequent visits to the Neitherworld but aren’t ready to pass on yet.

Instead there’s a door in the attic that leads to Beej’s living room.

Beetlejuice is tempted to charge them rent for it

Charles and Delia occasionally vacation to the Neitherworld, Beej or the Maitlands tag along. Lydia loves showing them cool spots and weird flora and fauna. As well as introducing them to her friends.

There’s a room in Beejs appartment he rents out as a dead and breakfast.

During these times the appartments mess is localized to Beejs room. And eventually it stays like that.

Prudence and Bertha have never knowingly been in the Neitherworld. Lydia is afraid they wouldn’t want to be her friends if they knew most of her friends were dead or monsters.

Betty juice is still a thing, and is the ‘niece’ of Mister Beetleman. Who can be found sometimes conning the citizens of whatever that towns name is. It’s got like three names.

The school is coed instead of an all girls school (that makes no sense in a small town to have seperate schools)

There are some other weird kids that are friends with Lydia but I haven’t named them yet.

An alien enthusiast and conspiracy theory nut boy.

And a ditzy pastel horse girl she loves Lydia’s entomology projects. But the boy is terrified of all things six or more legged.

The kids hang out at the local grave yard. Some kids stole the g a long time ago and it never got replaced. There are sometimes secret dance parties on the empty side of the lot.

Lydia is still very into photography and with the help of prudence runs the school newspaper

The Deetz family donates large sums to the Girl Scouts every year.

Sky actually thinks Beetlejuice is cool and is very into horror now.

The kids think it’s weird Lydia hangs out with a smelly old guy but hey, it’s free adult supervision.

Most parents dont trust him at first, he claims to be Lydia’s uncle and the Deetz family assures all parents he’s not a pedophile. They don’t say not a sex offender because frankly they aren’t sure about that.

The parents are trusting after Beetlejuice beats some guy into pulp after harassing some school kids he didn’t even know.

The rest of the school like Lydia better after that and Beetlejuice is a local hero-ish. He still always has some kind of con he’s trying to run and no one wants another pyramid scheme after the last one involved and actual pyramid.

The pyramid is near a local park, and was made into an art gallery.

Lydia’s search for her mom lasts a long time, they eventually do find her. Emily adores Delia and had given Charles the go ahead to remarry after her death.

Emily will sometimes haunt the Deetz household, but she already has her own house in the Neitherworld which Lydia visits often.

Chuck, Delia, and Emily will sometimes go on group dates in the Neitherworld, it can be hard to find a place that living people can actually eat at though.

There is a bizarre ‘normal’ area in the Neitherworld. It looks just like any normal town. And the people there are usually newly deads.

Beetlejuice takes up bug farming, beetles actually got eged out as his favorite after he got his hands on some Dubia roaches. He loves the ‘Creamy filling’. he covers them in powdered sugar like reptile keepers would cover them in calcium.

Lydia likes to pick up weird feeder bugs for him in pairs so he can try raising them. She’s a pet store regular, the employees have no idea what critter she keeps.

When Emily found out about Juno and Beetlejuice she named him her honorary son. But really gave him a chewing out over the green card thing.

Lydia helps Beetlejuice reconnect with the Juice family and they finally legally adopt him.

Beejs full name is Lawrence Betlguise Juice

I can’t think of anymore at the moment but this is real long already

[funkadox]

Stealing Stars From The Night

Part 2

"Ruby please stop snickering about my underwear drawer! Everyone has one!"

"But you have granny panties!" Yells an amused Ruby from Weiss' bed. Since Weiss had asked her to grab a pair of pantyhose from her dresser Ruby had been teasing her. Who puts pantyhose and period panties in the same drawer? Apparently Weiss

"For the last time. THEY ARE NOT GRANNY PANTIES YOU DOLT!" Weiss says as she steps out of her closet fully dressed. Elegant and beautiful were understatements to describe Weiss. The white haired girl wore a long, black velvet dress with black heels that made her taller than Ruby by about an inch or two. The spaghetti strap dress looks like it was made to be worn by Weiss Schnee, it even has a silver snowflake across the back.

"Holy shit."

"Language. But thank you.." Weiss says bashfully and walks up to Ruby who's jaw is open and eyes are lit up with not the purest thoughts running through her mind. Her hand cups the younger girl's jaw and smiles as it shuts. "Careful you might catch a bug, Yang does live here you know." She jokes and walks to the door.

"I- I gotta get dressed. I'll be right out." Ruby says and salutes her awkwardly. Weiss just shakes her head and leaves.

-

The clock strike 10 and the group is ready to bounce. The club is pretty close so they decide to walk which is a good idea considering that none of them would be in the best shape to drive after tonight.

"Remember, do not ask for pictures with celebrities! As far as everyone knows you are celebrities. No hookups in the bathroom, this is not a normal club and so don't treat it as such. Finally, do not talk to celebrities unless talked to first! I repeat do not talk-" Weiss is interrupted by a hand being drapped around her waist.

"We got it snow queen, we are not kids you know." Ruby states with a cheeky smile and chuckle.

"You are most definitely a child but whatever just behave everyone."

"Sir yes sir!" Sun drones and continues his conversation with Yang about how he is going to get pictures with every celebrity he sees.

-

The line for Atlas is incredibly long but Weiss just passes it by.

"Do you need an ID?"

"N-no ma'am please go on ahead." Is all the bouncer says as he opens the door for the group. Weiss' father owns Atlas so the staff all know Weiss.

"Woah this place is amazing!" Yang gasps as she looks around. The club has a decent amount of people in it but not nearly enough to seem crowded, the dance floor is lit up with neon colors alternating color tiles. She definitely understands why this place is so popular. "Hey I'm gonna get a drink are you guys coming?"

"The colors are so pretty! I'm gonna dance first but I'll see you soon!" Ruby says and runs to the dance floor.

"Ruby this is a club not a playground!" Yells Weiss who runs after the excited girl.

"I'll come with you, I can't leave the most dashing girl here alone." Sun flirts jokingly and walks with her to the bar.

"Ya know, god sure was cruel in making me a lesbian because I'm in love with you Sun!" Yang dramatically states and wipes a fake tear away.

"If only I was a girl! Then we could be together my love!"

"If only!" The two crack up and the bar keep just looks at them confused.

"So what'll it be for you two?" He asks and smiles charmingly.

"I'll have a strawberry sunrise with one of those little umbrellas! And he will have-"

"Your number~" He purrs smoothly and leans in.

"H-huh? I mean... Okay.."

"Wait that really worked!?"

"Yeah the name is Neptune and my standards have just been met."

"Wow they must be pretty low then." Yang says quietly and Sun growls at her. Neptune writes his number on Sun's wrist and goes to get Yang her drink.

"I didnt know you liked dudes?!"

"Neither did I." Sun shrugs and looks at Neptune who is trying his best not to look at the blond.

"So I'm the only one here who has no date? Wow I'm lame." She looks down at her long sleeved navy dress. "And I thought I looked like Hell in heels!"

"Oh honey you do, you are just too picky for your own good. It's not a bad thing but if you are looking for someone there is a dark haired beauty who keeps eyeing you from across the room." He says quietly and takes the drink Neptune was giving Yang.

"Thanks I'll be around, say when do you get off?"

Yang quits listening when she turns around and sees none other than Blake Belladonna. She is indeed looking over at her from a booth in the back corner. The red haired man from earlier is next to her talking to a girl with brown hair pulled into a pony tail. Yang smirks and turns back around. "Ay Nept what does the girl in that booth back there like?"

"Ah Belladonna? She doesn't drink a lot when she is here but- oh shit she ordered a long island! I totally forgot!"

Ay calm down, make it and I'll go give it to her so you can continue talking to lover boy over here."

"Thanks fam! I owe you one." Neptune says and begins making the drink. Yang smiles and puts a hand on Sun's shoulder.

"You sure you want that one? He seems a lil spacey."

"He's perfect shut up!" Sun says and looks up at her. "So youre gonna go flirt up some celebrity huh? Even better Blake Belladonna? She's like so famous! Especially now that the third season of White Fang dropped on Netflix. Better make sure Weiss doesn't see ya."

"Hey she's eyeing me so technically that's kinda talking to me first right?"

"Oh definitely." Sun says and shakes his head. Neptune returns with the drink and hands it to her.

"Good luck, Adam can be a bitch so try not to get into it with him."

"Will do!"

Yang begins her walk to Blake and waves at Weiss who is currently trying her best not to look like she is having fun with Ruby dancing with her. The guards stop Yang before she gets to the booth but Blake waves them off.

"Finally my tea."

"This is a long island, darlin."

"Yes, the best kind of tea around." She says softly and smiles up at Yang. Yang grins and sits the drink down.

"I would agree with you but I'm not much of a tea drinker."

"Yeah you seem more like the alcohol 24/7 type."

"Why does everyone always make that assumption!? I'm not a raging alcoholic I'll have you know." Yang shoots back with no malice in her tone but a pout on her face.

"Sorry, sorry well now I feel bad is there anyway I can make it up to you?"

"Hmm maybe a dance could help your case but I wont promise anything."

"A dance sounds lovely." Blake says gently and slips out of the booth. A hand grabs her wrist and she groans. "Adam I'm fine, just because you're my tv boyfriend doesnt mean you have to be so protective or whatever.." She says and shakes her wrist free. Yang had been ignoring the glares she was getting from the man since she had walked over. The two walked to the dance floor and began to dance to the techno beat that was playing. The sparks only got brighter as they dance. Their bodies seem to fit together like puzzle pieces, finding their way back together when one separates to get a drink. It's like magic. And not drunken magic that you'll regret later buy real, heart racing magic that only comes once in a lifetime.

"So I'm gonna guess ex boyfriend?" Yang begins when he catches Adam scoffing at them.

"Hm I guess you can say that.. We kinda got together for publicity reasons but he is just so uptight and mean to fans and just people in general that I couldn't handle being anything more than costars with him."

"I'm sorry, well maybe he will get the hint that you're not into him now."

"And why's that?" Blake asks with a sly smirk. Yang only answers by putting a soft hand on the other's hip and dragging her hand down her spine, pulling her closer as she does so.

"Because you're obviously into me." Yang says seductively into her ear. The girl is surprised when she hears a purr like sound escape Blake's lips and a hand on her neck.

"Hmm well I might be but I don't do one nightstands or club flings so if you really want me and not because I'm hot and famous meet me at that library around the corner."

Yang is certainly surprised by the beauty's words, Blake is smart for not wanting to go home with some stranger off the street. It would ruin her image in the public eye and make anyone think they could just walk up to her and ask her out.

"Alright, what time?"

"Hmmm how about 3? And dont bring any friends with you, I dont like to share." Blake says softly against Yang's lips, tempting her but Yang knows what she is doing. Yang knows that she is seeing if she will take the bait and try to rush things.

"3 sounds great and I was guessing you'd be possessive." Yang jokes and spins Blake around to which Blake only grins back. Yang spots the guards making their way towards them and looks at Blake. "Well I guess this is farewell."

"It seems so, but not for long. I'll see you tomorrow. By the way I didn't get your name."

"It's Yang. Yang Xiao long."

"Well Yang, Yang Xiao long here is my card." Blake grabs a card out of her bra slowly and tucks it into Yang's hand. "Bye~"

"Bye" Yang looks at the card and back at the girl.

-

Adam tries to push her for entails on Yang but Blake only brushes him off to talk to Ilia who gets in the limo awaiting them. She looks back to Adam who just walks back in the club ignoring the camera flashes.

"So tall blonde and goofy huh?"

"Yeah she's really sweet and not like in a creepy overbearing way. Which is surprising to find at a night club."

"Well you are a celebrity, maybe she is just a raging fan."

"I thought that too but she has never watched the show, she knows what it is but it never peaked her interest. She thinks the CGI cat ears are cute on me though."

"Well of course she isnt going to tell you she watches the show."

"Oh dont be like that, you sound like Adam."

"Well maybe he is right!?" Ilia says a little too loudly, but takes a breath and sighs. "Sorry.. I'm just tired I guess."

Blake looks at her in confusion but shrugs. "I don't expect you to get it but he isn't right. I'm a person before a celebrity you know? And I guess I like being treated as such for once.." Blake gets out of the car once it reaches her large estate. It's not as big as she could get but it is indeed very nice. "See ya around Ilia." Is all she says before walking up the gravel path and going inside.

-

Yang makes her way back to Sun who hasnt stopped flirting with Neptune. The two seem to really be hitting it off especially now that Neptune isn't working anymore. "Hey guys hows it going?"

"Well well well if it isnt the deserter."

"Oh I'm the deserter? Boy you are so caught up with him that you might as well be pinning him-" Sun covers her mouth before she finishes.

"Ahahaha shut it."

"Sorry sorry."

"HellO Everyone I love you all!" Yells a very VERY intoxicated Ruby with Weiss holding her up.

"I told her drinking 5 strawberry daiquiri's in an hour would be dumb but she never listens." Weiss groans and puts Ruby on a stool. "Cross your legs your dress is short."

"No." Ruby says defiantly and spreads her legs.

"Ruby close your legs!" Weiss says and covers her face.

"Make me then." Ruby pulls Weiss close and winks at her making Weiss a blushing mess.

Yang cant help but laugh which doesnt help the situation at all. It only spurs Ruby on making her hug Weiss and lay her head on her chest.

"Yang, Sun help me!"

"No can do sweetheart I have a hot date~" purrs Sun and wraps a hand around Neptune's waist offering a shy wave.

"Wait, wait Sun you are a gay too?! That's so cool bro! You can like all the dudes cause I like no dudes, none of them. I mean I like you but not LIKE like you, you are gay and I'm gay so we are just bros! You keep doing you boo, I love you Sun-" she starts to cry and buries her face in Weiss' dress. "I love you!"

Sun holds back a laugh and shakes his head. Yang chuckles and helps Ruby up.

"Alright Ruby-roo lets get going wouldnt want you confessing your love to anyone else." Yang says softly and practically throws Ruby over her shoulder. She offers a small wave farewell to the boys and leaves with Weiss. Or does she?

-end part 2

I wanted to continue more but I hit max length :/ hope you guys like this part tho!

[istheresomebodywhocanimagine]

hi i saw this on @fruityfreddie​‘s blog (bless bri’s heart) and wanted to do it so i could take a mental break from writing this joe smut (it is.... overwhelming rn) so here u go

A - age: 19 (my fake id says 21 tho lmao)

B - birthplace: buttfuck egypt, iowa (yee yee boys)

C - current time: 8:15ish pm

D - drink you last had: topsy’s cherry limeade 

E - easiest person to talk to: my bff since 7th grade and our friend from D.C. they’re literally my ppl i love them so much even if we are wildly different ppl

F - favorite song: rocky mountain way by joe walsh/the eagles depending on who you are (six blade knife by dire straits is a v close second)

G - grossest memory: i was on winter break in cancun just this past december with my cousins and some friends and in the middle of the night my cousin literally started throwing up in the resort room’s bathroom and while she was throwing up all of the tequila she shit herself through her WHITE pajama shorts. iconic moment truly but disgusting the picture of it still haunts me. side note: at the resort i very drunk-ly karaoked we are the champions and made friends with a girl who karaoked dont stop me now so the power of queen is truly almighty

H - horror yes or horror no: as long as it has a good plot yet. horror for the sake of horror like all that jigsaw shit is STOOPID imo

I - in love: nope just livin life for me

J - jealous of people: only jealous of anita dobson and that is that

K - is there no k???? alrighty then i’m adding “kryptonite” (your biggest weakness): champagne, curly hair (ugh i’d give it all up for mark ruffalo), and cats

L - love at first sight or should i walk by again: i’m actually pretty sure i’m allergic to falling in love because i’ve been told i’m a detached person unless i rlly know someone so like.... your feet might fall off before i actually fall in love w u

M - middle name: renee

N - number of siblings: two (a younger brother and an older sister)

O - one wish: i rlly wanna be able to secure my ideal position in the field i’m currently studying (Social Media Management) so for me that would be like... managing the social media of an actor, musician, or someone in the fine arts side of things. hehe

P - person you last called: my brother bc we passed each other on the road and he had his new gf with him and i wanted to meet her

Q - question you’re always asked: are you adopted? bc the rest of my family has brown hair, and 3/4 of the rest of my family has brown eyes, dark skin, and curly hair. now tell me how tf this fits in with any of that:

R - reading anything right now?: Four Days In November by Vincent Bugliosi (its about the kennedy assassination and its RLLY good i bought it when i visited dallas by myself last summer)

S - song you last sang: Sedona by Houndmouth hehe

T - time you woke up: 8:30 am bc college has literally made it so my body is up at 8:30 every day no matter how late i went to bed

U - underwear color: purple hehe they’re not cute i’m about to start my period so i’m preparing for the worst 

V - vacation destination: if we’re talkin where am i going on vacation next, no effing clue. i’m pretty much working all summer but I’m going to see The Struts in July and Queen + Adam in august so thats kinda a vacay??? but if its my ideal vaca destination then Southern Germany for sure

W - when was the last time you really laughed: this morning bc i took a video of me sneezing and then started crying bc it was so funny i wish yall could see it im fucking hilarious

X - x-rays: im genuinely lucky that i’ve never had to have xrays besides my FUCKED UP TEETH but i had braces way back in elementary so its been a big ol minute 

Y - your favorite food: honestly? creamy teriyaki cajun sauce on a penne pasta and if i feel like eating meat (a usually rare occasion) a lil chicken in there. slaps so fucking hard yall (meat makes my shtummy hurt)

Z - zodiac sign: Cancer (dont roast me i match with brian may we are one)

also i tag any of yall that wanna do it ugh the original rules are to tag 10 ppl and i dont even know 10 ppl on here im intimidated by everyone

[anonymously-odd]

Hey I am having some friend issues.

So one of my best friends Makayla(calling her that for the story) has been my friend since we were in daycare. I have known her for so long and tomorrow I start my freshman year of highschool. She just moved and she won't tell me why so 1. She no longer goes to my school which means I cant talk to her on a daily basis and 2. She always seems to be in a bad mood. I want to help her as I always have but she just treats me so mean and I dont know if she realizes she can be pretty mean. I am always the sort of thearipist and mother of my whole friend circle so people normally come to me if they have problems including her. I can understand if she does not want to talk about it right away but she does things like this before and then tells other people but never me. One instance that has hurt me is she used to have a boyfriend lets call him Adam and and he moved away to texas a while back. Makayla was trying to set me up with say Tyler(Again fake name) and I had been talking to him a bit and then all of a sudden ahe is keeping tbis big secret. She keeps it for 2 weeks then suddenly she tells me that she was dating him while I had been trying to talk to him. She thought that I would be upset and sure I was a little but not that she started dating him but that she had been leading me to think that I should go for him and that she had told some of our other friends. She made me think that she thought that little of me and that I would have such a deep attachment to some one I had been talking to for 3-4 weeks. She thought that I was petty enough to rage over another persons man. Another thing is that one our mutual friends say Marie she is so close to her and she has only known her for less than three years and seems to put her above me in all lights like she is on this pedestal. It got even worse when they discovered the Korean ban BTS no hate to BTS btw they are an amazing group and now it is almost all they talk about. Every time I am around the both of them together I feel like an outcast like a 3rd wheel. The thing is Makayla has a bit of depression and her aunt who she lives with is really tough on her and she cuts and on days where she isnt feeling the best she will just basically ignore me and then when she is around Maria she will be the happiest person or even around any of our other friends and I try and help her, make her laugh, make her smile but it never seems to be enough. What should I do. Sorry if this is too long or irritats you.

[wayhaughterthanyou]

OF COURSE I’M BACK. WHO WOULD I BE IF NOT LIVING IN YOUR BLOG WAITING FOR A CHANCE TO SPAM YOUR ASKS? 1-100

You are very much welcome to spam my asks any time you’d like

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? Enough for my cereal to be moist but not enough for it to be swimming…also I hate milk and usually have coconut or a lactate free milk

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? Honestly my favorite shit

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? I used to get in trouble for reading a lot as a kid so I often used a ton of obscure things but I think my favorites were a shoelace and another book

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I depends on the kind of tea tbh but usually if it’s anything but black tea I’ll drink it plain. As for coffee I hate brewed coffee but I love espresso and I’ll drink that with anything but my favorite is probably an undertow

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? YES! I broke my two front teeth in middle school (long story) and I’ve just been bleh about it since

6: do you keep plants? I don’t but that sounds cute and now I’m sad that I don’t. Daddy needs a lil cactus or something

7: do you name your plants? I shall name my cactus Princess Rosalina Maria Fiore Montoya

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? Writing and film

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Baby the only way to spread christmas cheer is singing loudly for ALL to hear

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? I used to sleep curled in a ball on my side but I have a back injury rn and can only sleep on my back and its terrible and I hate it

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? Lisa.

12: what’s your favorite planet? Earth. The ocean literally makes me want to cry thinking about it

13: what’s something that made you smile today? Waking up and seeing this ask

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? Like interior design? Oh wow, like a mix of modern and rustic? My brother and I are classy boys; we like to feel like we’re living in a spaceship and a cabin simultaneously

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! GOOGLE?? THAT WEBSITE FOR PLEBS WHO DONT KNOW SPACE FACTS?? The moon landing was faked.

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? Pene al Vodka

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? Right now I kinda just want to bleach it but I’m not sure if I should do it before pride or after.

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. Umm there is a picture of me…called Jaba the Hyuck..and um.. yeah

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? I don’t and I actually never have, however I have always written by hand so I used to always carry around a book.

20: what’s your favorite eye color? Trick question I have literally never seen an eyeball that I have not fallen in love with sooo

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. My messenger bag, which has had both sides of the straps resewn, has been peed on by a resentful cat, and lugged around 30 pounds of bullshit my senior year

22: are you a morning person? I have to be! I wake up at 4:30 on weekdays for my job

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Play video games

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? Yes which is weird saying that out loud

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? An abandoned preschool

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? Vans high tops

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? Okay so I hate actually chewing gum for a prolonged period of time anymore but I love the watermelon 5 gum

28: sunrise or sunset? Watching the sunset with someone and then staying up to watch the sunrise

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? @a-maelstrom​ thinks she’s tough but it just makes me want to pinch her cheeks ;)

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? I live with 2 demons I’m scared every day of my life

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I used to hate socks but after losing 100 lbs really fast and having absolutely no more blubber to keep you warm you learn that socks are nice and are just here to keep you cozy. But I’ll only wear black ankle socks

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. We we’re playing Mario Party on my friends wii and we decided we were going to play until disney started airing the old shows like Kim Possible and shit, but then the batteries died. BUT there was a 711 around the corner that we could all walk to BUT we lived in a really jacked up town. Long story short we saw 3 drug deals on the way and when we got back I won the game and my friend rage quit and turned the system off before I had a proper chance to bask in my glory

33: what’s your fave pastry? I love Italian cookies

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? Okay I had two, they were both life sized black labs, one a puppy and the other an adult, and they were called Big Blacky and Little Blacky cause I’m creative as fuck I still have them in a bag in the attic somewhere

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? I only use on type of pen. Pilot Pen G.2 7.0mm

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? 99% of the time I’ll have an album that takes over my entire soul (because I used a technique with writing long works that involves music) and right now thats One Fell Swoop by The Spill Canvas

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? I like it clean however my brother and I use it as a rec room right now so it’s like… a mess

38: tell us about your pet peeves! CHEWING. I don’t care if you resort to swallowing things whole around me I don’t want to hear you chew

39: what color do you wear the most? Black or blue

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I have a necklace that hasn’t left my neck since I was 15. It means everything

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? To Kill a Mockingbird is my favorite book, but the most recent one I’ve read and loved is called The Ables by Jeremy Scott

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! I don’t! I wish I had a cute one that I went to

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? I don’t think anyone’s actually amused me enough to look at the stars with me so I’m gonna say my dog cause I used to find constellations at night and he’d join me in the backyard and lay with me

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? I don’t lmao

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? I always do, which sometimes gets me into trouble but fuck it ya know

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. What do you call a lobster with a boob job at a dirty bus stop? A busty crustacean at a crusty bus station

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? Spagettios

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Spiders. Hell yes motherfucker

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? I do only because my brothers car only plays CD’s I have no idea what the last one I bought was though

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? I collect currency from other countries, but only the ones that I find in the US. Like going to a country and bringing back the currency is cheating, I have to find it here

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? The first person that came to mind is my brother and the song is Fear of Flying by A Rocket to the Moon

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? Oh wow I don’t know man

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? I have watched all of them. Beetlejuice and Pulp Fiction are amazing and I love them, but RHPS and Heathers (especially the musical) very much impacted my life and my art

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? My dad when I told him he has white privilege

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? Oh god I’m such a dramatic bitch I’ll do anything to prove a point

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? Honesty, compassion and the ability to see past one’s own beliefs to at least try to understand someone else’s

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? I don’t there’s been a time I’ve listened to that song without getting the chills and acting it out like a madman

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? My friend Adam is the wine aunt, my brother is the vodka aunt, and you can call me daddy

59: what’s your favorite myth? TSM Myth

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? Very rarely

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?  A condom.. on both sides..cause we’re so funnny

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? I don’t have a “regular schedule” where I “consume nutrients” but I love apple juice

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? Yes they’re me babes

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? It’s a beautiful blue and the sky writers are practicing for the air show coming up this summer

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? Yeah quite a few, but I might be seeing one at Pride

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? Cute and classy

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Like the outside matches the inside

68: what’s winter like where you live? Sometimes we have blizzards and sometimes is 70 on christmas

69: what are your favorite board games? Monopoly and chess neither of which anyone will ever play with me

70: have you ever used a ouija board? Baby doll how do you think I got these demons

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? The twitter kind

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? I’m the type of person who knows I’ll forget but doesn’t write it down anyway

73: what are some of your worst habits? I crack everything

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. A lil honey bee

75: tell us about your pets! I HAVE 6! A big ol mutt named Roscoe and he’s my boy and i taught him everything he knows (hes good at turning tricks) a whippet and jack-Russel mix named Sandy and shes a lil dummy, then a tux cat named Domino thats scared of everyone, a fat orange cat named Max who got lazy and took a nap on a scale one day (hes 17lbs), my baby boy Bandit, he has mainecoon in him and he has an extra thumb and is my world, and I have a turtle named Peewee who we call Pubes

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? Editing

77: pink or yellow lemonade? PINK

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? I liked them in despicable me but it gets old seeing them everywhere

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? My cat loves me and thats all i can ask for

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? Beige, nope my landlord

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. ROUND ORBS, SQUARE HOUSE

82: are/were you good in school? I hated it because I was smarter than everyone so everyone hated me

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? The art from Nothing personal by All Time Low, the deluxe edtion, but more specifically the art printed directly on the CD

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? I have so many planned but I’m getting a farnsworth from Warehouse 13 that says “endless wonder”

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? I read the Rick and Morty ones and I was big on batman in

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? They’re absoutely everything to me. Sgt. Peppers, Pet Sounds, Pretty Odd, One Fell Swoop, Broken Bride..ugh my shit

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? Jaws, Wizard of Oz, a lot more that I can’t think of

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? I don’t like moving thanks

89: are you close to your parents? Nope

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. Seattle!

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? Hopefully moving away

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? I’m gross and I have barely any

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? HAt

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? My friend pat

95: what are your plans for this weekend? I’m about to eat a taco and smoke pot and I’ve got nothing after that

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? The time when my computer crashed after 80 questions was because it auto started an update because it wouldn’t allow me to put it off anymore

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? INFP, Libra, and Ravenclaw

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? A couple of months ago when my town threw a concert in the part for Zebra, it was fun cause we smoked in the woods

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. Oh, Calamity- All Time Low, Bottom of the Deep Blue Sea- Missio, This is for Keeps- The Spill Canvas

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? Future. fuck old me that bitch is dumb i don’t wanna see him

THANK YOU FOR RETURNING TO MEEEEE! My ask is always open and I’m always SO VERY LONELY!

[baronvontribble]

Original drabble, pt. 7

Navigation: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

looool

Faking a cough and telling his boss that he needed a few days off was easy. Writing an email to the his contact down the pipeline and telling them that he'd need a few weeks was much, much harder. The wording had to be just right; they didn't really have specific codephrases or anything, but they never said anything outright either. He went through several drafts before finally settling on one that he was satisfied with.

em-

gonna have 2 postpone that lunch date downtown this weekend. got a helluva leak & the landlord wont do shit so im gonna have to fix it myself. will hit u up when i have the time again

-marshmallow

ps: ill pay for ur train tickets dont worry

He leaned back in his chair and stared at it, letting out a nervous breath. "That'll work, right?"

"It looks appropriately misleading to me," Adam said.

"Emily's a smart kid, I've worked with her before. She should be able to pick up on it." Ted folded his arms and continued to stare at the message. "And hopefully it'll just look like I'm postponing a date with an out-of-town girlfriend to anyone else."

"I noticed it's a different email than the one tied to your phone."

"Always has been. I've got what, five different emails now?" He shifted in his seat, joints creaking from spending too long in his computer chair. He hadn't really moved too much since that morning, and it was well past noon by then. He'd been making sure he could deliver on what he'd promised. "The phone's the weakest link. Thing is, the messenger's the only thing installed on it, and no one in the pipeline uses that particular app for messaging since it's dated as shit. Mom uses it, but that's about it, and I doubt she's gonna rat me out even if she finds out what I do."

"How can you be sure of that?"

Ted smirked. "She works at a hospital that's run almost entirely by robots. Divorced my dad over it being a good idea to do shit like that to begin with. I'm pretty sure I know what side of the fence she's on with the whole AI thing."

"I see." That was all he had to say on that, apparently. After that little freak-out earlier, Adam didn't seem to be in all that wordy of a mood. But then, he was busy trying to tag still images with what he saw in them in another tab, so Ted wasn't about to hold it against him.

Well, it wasn't like Ted lacked for conversation topics. "How's it going so far? The tagging, I mean."

"Badly." A few seconds later he broke his non-chatty streak to elaborate, "I'm going by colors for now. I opened up a second page that helps me match hexadecimal codes to both specific and generic color names, but that's usually as far as I get. It doesn't help that lighting seems to have an effect on what appearance a given base color might take."

And the dumbass was probably sampling those colors pixel by pixel, too. Using brute processing force was one way to master the process, Ted supposed.

"Don't feel bad if it takes a while. You'll get the hang of it."

"You sound way too amused by this."

"Who, me? Never. I'm the very essence of stoicism."

Adam had a smile in his voice when he spoke again. "Liar."

"Yeah, alright. You caught me." Ted stretched out in his chair and stifled a yawn, joints popping as they flexed beyond where they probably should. "I'm just happy you're figuring it out. I mean, even just realizing that you can cross-reference is a step in the right direction."

"It would be easier if I knew what I was looking at."

"Want me to help?" Partway through the process of typing his email, Ted had realized that the help he could offer might not be so well-received. He didn't want to make things harder than they already were; he had to be tactful, wait for permission. He couldn't just insert himself into proceedings like he so often did. This was a delicate situation. He knew that now.

Or he could be overthinking it. Adam couldn't quite sigh, but he could portray some semblance of relief in his voice. "I'd appreciate it," he said; a moment later, the laptop had been tabbed in to the correct window so Ted could participate. "Try to restrain yourself from giving bad answers to fuck with me. This data has to be accurate."

"I know, I know." Ted did know. Really. "But gimme a minute, okay? I'm gonna plug in my mouse so I can use it to point things out to you."

"Right."

And so it began.

The images were little more than stock photos, and the 'game' was to tag as many details as possible. Matching up with what other people had tagged it with meant a better score. Ted was observant to a fault, so his results with such things in the past had been mixed at best as he sometimes noticed things that no one ever bothered to tag. This made it all the more viable as a learning tool, because not only was Adam learning what other people tagged the image with and why - seeing what an average person might be able to glean from it - but he was also having the tiny details pointed out to him by someone who was way too anxious to not notice basically everything.

Since the goal was not just to get Adam to be able to notice details, but to also have him act convincingly human while doing so, this gave him a reasonable benchmark for what he could mention he'd noticed to an average person without looking like he had a weirdly photographic memory with the perfect ability to recall anything and everything. To Ted, this was step one. The average person sees a duck in a pond - maybe even identifying the duck as a mallard - while the hyper-observant person sees that it's overcast and around midday from the sky's reflection in the pond's surface or that there's a gum wrapper and a bit of soggy bread clearly visible in the murky water near the detritus-littered shore.

It was the photos of people that were really a nightmare for Adam. For all his ability to pick up on all the tiny nonverbal cues present in an audio recording, he couldn't so much as even guess at gender presentation of random people in stock photos, let alone their expressions or body language. Ted had to walk him through every last detail, and these were the prettiest, most unambiguous sorts of human beings to boot. The photos were dominated by tall, broad men with either lantern jaws or facial hair, and soft, curvy women with round faces and perfect contouring; women had long hair, men had short hair, and children were dressed as either very male or very female to match the adults. Ted found them obnoxious.

And that wasn't even getting into indicators of disability or profession or anything. Just once, he'd like to see more average people pop up in these things. He was downright relieved to get back to pictures of sheep and grass and flowers and buildings and boats whenever he got done with tagging a person. Not-people didn't bother him nearly as much.

Either way, somewhere along the line he lost track of time completely.

"You should eat something," Adam said out of the blue at one point. Ted straightened up in his chair and shot a glance at the clock in the corner of the laptop's screen, only to frown at it like it'd betrayed him.

It was almost three in the afternoon already? Christ. "Probably," he admitted, stretching out with a slight wince. "Feel like you're making progress yet?“

"I don't know. How do you 'feel' progress? It seems like something that should have a clearer definition than to just feel it." 

"Hey man, don't knock feelings. They've got definitions, those definitions are just subjective as fuck." Ted was smiling as he said it, mirroring what he'd heard in Adam's own voice. Both of them were joking. Adam knew full well what Ted had meant, he was just taking a jab at the presentation. "Do you think you've made progress so far?"

"Yes." Adam sounded terribly smug, as if to say see? That was all you had to say. "It's slow, but once I know what I'm looking at, it makes things easier."

Ted shoved off from the desk and stood, taking another moment to stretch. "Cool. Then I'm gonna make some pizza rolls."

Off he went. "Those are bad for you," Adam said as he wandered off. "Humans need nutrients. Pizza rolls are not nutritious."

"Don't care," Ted replied. Along with the pizza rolls, he made sure to retrieve a soda out of the fridge as well just to be contrary. It was hard to care about minor health hazards when he so often had major ones to worry about, and people telling him that he probably should care only made him less likely to do so. "It's calories. It'll work as a stand-in for lunch until I get to dinner."

"I don't think that's how nutrition works." Several seconds passed as Ted wrestled with the packaging, got a plate, and put everything in the microwave.

"Ted. I looked it up. This isn't food, Ted. It has about the same value as eating cardboard."

"Ayep." Ted cracked open the soda and took a swig as he turned on the microwave and let it spin.

"Do you do this often?"

Ted snorted. "Uh, do you really want me to answer that question?"

"According to this site, when the potential long-term effects of such a poor diet are combined with your outward symptoms - such as being the wrong color for a human - it's a strong indicator that your kidneys are probably failing." Adam spoke as if he felt he was the absolute voice of authority on this, and Ted shook with silent laughter as he leaned against the counter. "I think you should get bloodwork done."

"Dude." Good God, what kind of website had Adam even managed to find? Ted felt like he was talking to his grandparents after they'd spent three hours on an online medical journal and decided he looked like he had some obscure genetic disorder that would give him pulmonary fibrosis (whch he didn't). "That 'being the wrong color' thing? It's genetic. I have practically no pigmentation. It's not gout or scurvy or whatever the hell you've found on the internet, just albinism and shitty lighting."

Silence reigned for at least ten full seconds. "I see."

"I take vitamins, alright? And I know my diet isn't all that great, but it's not like pizza rolls are all I eat." He was about to say something about how Adam had seen him eat other things, but then he remembered that Adam couldn't actually see all that well. "Besides, if there was something in my bloodwork, my doctor woulda told me last time I had a checkup. See, unlike some humans, I get those pretty regularly."

"Right." Then, "I'm sorry."

"What for, man? I'm not mad. Hell, at least you care." He'd take a little overworrying anyday if it meant someone was at least trying to understand his problems. It was kinda cute. Big tough super high-tech AI worrying about a squishy human. "And y'know, if you wanna know what's actually wrong with me, all you gotta do is ask."

The microwave beeped, and Adam considered. "You'd tell me that?"

"I tell people all the time."

"No, that's not-" He cut himself off mid-rendering, and Ted raised an eyebrow over in the direction of the living room while pulling the pizza rolls out of the microwave. "Isn't that like telling me how your code is written?"

Huh. Ted had never thought of it that way. "Not really. It's more like, uh... I guess I figure that telling you what versions of what software is running isn't exactly going to give you access to any of the passwords protecting my data, but it will tell you how to work with what I've got going on." Was that an accurate analogy? This barrier to understanding really did go both ways.

The fans weren't quite roaring, but they were definitely humming away audibly in the background; it was always so easy to tell when Adam was mulling something over. "Yes, I would like to know. If that's all right."

"Fine by me." With a plate in one hand and a drink in the other, Ted came back to the not-a-desk and plopped right back down in his chair. "For starters, look up Ehlers-Danlos syndrome."

A minute later Adam asked him how the hell he was alive, and he almost breathed a mouthful of pizza roll.

[ts-akhmim]

Episode 13 | “STIMULUS CHECK? NO BITCH HERE'S A REALITY CHECK” - Adam

so. its over and im out of the game. i waited a couple hours to write this because i knew i would hurt some feelings if i didnt and if we learnt anything from today its that jake's feelings get hurt real easy and we wouldn't want that would we. i think the reason i have struggled (and likely still will) to get closure is because i don't think this makes sense for jake? i've had some frustrations and some suspicions with jake over the past two rounds but i had no intentions of cutting him any time soon. i am a shield he so desperately needed what is wrong with him. like even if i wanted to cut him how on earth would i have got it done? with what numbers. to use a quote from autumn in the game we played together before but adapted for this instance, "today we learned unless jake feels like the prettiest girl at the dance every minute of every day, you’re not doing enough". now to the fun stuff. i want to just tribute to adam and autumn. adam is someone i was SO sus of at the start but he is a gem. his personality is so vibrant he is a true gem. autumn hill is who i wanna dedicate this to and focus this on. autumn is one of my best allies ever and one of my favourite ORG people ever... what a complete. legend. such a role model to me in my real life, she has taught me to be confident, to back myself and to not take any shit and for that I'm so grateful. i literally am so honoured to call her my friend and i cant wait to meet her in person when she moves to the UK WOOOO. anyway i've also moved on from being 100% self negative. i fought so hard this season i played so so so hard and i fought my way to F8 despite being a threat since F21. i did the damn thing and im proud, and even tho it sucks that all my fighting was cut short by my closest ally i tried my very best and that's all i can do. thank you to the hosts for bringing me back, its been a... journey hehe

I don’t think anyone is ready for this round or at least what’ll come of it... I’m expecting an explosion or a mess given Jakey thinks he’s staying, TJ has been lied to, and hopefully Autumn or Adam leave next... its all a mess. If Jakey goes, I’m planning a 2-2-2 split between Autumn and Adam where we maybe get Autumn out but Adam leaving doesn’t hurt either. 

Well that vote blows... I really thought I had someone that I could navigate this end game with and then it got completely taken away from me. Now, I know I have to do what’s best for my game. And there’s two scenarios I see being possible: 1. Staying with my alliance and voting out Autumn/Adam and then risking that the three Beauties will actually cut someone in that group. 2. I flippy flippy and vote with Autumn (oh dear, I’m actually considering this?) and get Amir out to set myself up with Kendal and Augusto to get to the F3. Amir just told me he has the Beauty idol, so this may be my only shot to get him out of this game. I really need to consider both of these options, because I think this is the round that makes or breaks my entire game.

Having a mental breakdown over the fact that I’m probably gonna lose jakeys friendship And even tho our friendship was 100% real and I love him so much he’s gonna think it was all fake

https://66.media.tumblr.com/0d8a51f03cf584de6183ffd755b60d02/tumblr_nsvsd4arRn1rrcjuxo1_r1_400.gifv

Not a single person in this game has ever wanted to go to the end with me except for kendall Jakeys trying to take her out right now and i want to keep jakey in the game so bad but 4 people want him out so bad and the only way to save him is with my idol and i want to keep my idol and i want to keep a relationship with kendall but augusto will know that its my idol that saved jakey so my entire game will be blown the fuck up so i have to just let him go strategically, Since jakey is leaving, i wanna try and make sure adam is next because hes the strongest competitor that will be left and if i make it to five and four i need to win comps. Okay I need to actually strategize lmao so after this vote if it goes as expected I believe autumn has the idol, just based on how she was behaving Her and adam and me are afraid of tj kendall Augusto final 3, however, if that does become a final 3, I can force it out of kendall, so as long as Adam and autumn do not win immunity, we can split the vote on them, or just 3 beauties vote together strong. I’m also using autumn and Adams target on tj to make tj want them out even more, so next round, autumn and adam vs tj is a thing, and the 3 beauties can be safe as long as it doesn’t tie, and if worst comes to worst, I still have my idol, which can get me in the final 5 but I really really want to save my idol for final 5 

JAKEY GETS VOTED OUT

So here’s my dilemma for the round: I basically started the Adam name with Amir. I would prefer to go with that because I don’t know if I can beat Adam at the end. The problem with this though is that I don’t want to lose Jakey if he’s so for getting rid of Kendall. So where is the middle ground here?

So I think tonight is going to be my night. I have a lot of power right now in this game oddly enough. Are people potentially going for me, yeah, but I'm going to be safe which means I probably have enough room to screw up whoever's plan I would like to. Amir wants to do a 2-2-2 split, which I can easily screw up if I get Adam and Autumn on my side (which I see possibly happening). I can more than likely convince Autumn she doesn't need to play an idol if she's the vote (maybe on that one). And I know Adam wants to make a move with me saying Augusto is trying to get the vote on me or Autumn, which shows my concern that the three Beauties are at least locked to final four (I don't think they'd all take one another, but I don't think they'll turn on one another just yet). So now, here's where I may be able to take a stand and put myself in a spot where I may have some control. I need that one move that is at the top of my resume... can this be the one? Question is: what the hell is that move?

I was really confident last night we had a good plan set up but today I dont know why in my gut i feel like im about to be voted out, i dont want to be a pessimist but im just making this so i dont feel like a *complete* fool so um yeah...... we're about to go to tribal in a matter of minutes, autumn isnt playing the idol so im gonna feel real dumb if i gave it to her and she screws me over, but i did my work, and at this point all i can do is sit and keep my fingers crossed things go my way, but trust and believe even if im voted out yall will see ONE final confessional from me dragging them left and right. 

Okay back to this game, so basically, I do not trust anyone at this current moment not a single person except maybe kendall, this is the most wild vote I have ever ! I think I’m getting bamboozled literally, OKAY OKAY OKAY so Augusto tells adam that he wants to do autumn, Adam tells me and autumn that, we talk to autumn, autumn gets tj on board. From my perception, autumn and adam should be believe that us 4 are voting Augusto and leaving kendall out of it. But then tj and I already told Augusto that plan, and the real plan is to 2-2-2 them, Incase one of them plays an idol. But I have so much fear from the things that tj has been telling Augusto about his fear of my idol and me being at final 5 and 4, and also telling me he’s scared Theres no cracks in the beauty alliance, so he might actually agree to that plan with us and then 3-2-1 me by telling them everything because he literally could do that And then whoever wins immunity is going to change everything even more, because of one of them wins, the other can play the idol on themselves which is a whole ass mess in itself, and right now, it just comes down to if I trust tj and Augusto . R they telling me the truth or are they lying ? Like I’m dkdjdjnd kdndkdnd Anyway, I probs am playing my idol today cuz I don’t wanna look like booboo the fool but also we love risks, so I might just not play my idol, idk idk it depends who wins immunity and it depends on the vibe I get from tj moving foreward 

So I haven't really been making confessionals... In my defense I have been busy but that doesn't mean I haven't been active... So I have a final 2 deal with everyone in the cast sans Autumn. I have a deal with TJ, I have a deal with Augusto and I have a deal with Amir. And as much as it sucks I am going to stick to Augusto and Amir. Sorry TJ you are a good bean but I don't want to lose to you. 

Should I blame the whole plan on tj http://prntscr.com/ss4sie

i didnt make a confessional before the live since i wasnt sure what the HELL was gonna happen so hello coming to you LIVE from the afterlife because yall didnt THINK you could fly me off this island without one last adam rant for the season did you? for the first time in all 3 times ive played actually....feeling some type of way over being voted out, maybe it's just because of quarantine and having literally nothing better to do, but i took this game seriously and i tried my damndest. I think my fatal mistake was trying too hard (or maybe not enough?) today with certain people, i was trying to play them all and my biggest fear of them either comparing notes and catching on, or they just didnt want to hear me out, ALSO THE TWIST PLEASEEEEEE im kinda glad if i went out it was kinda just....in that big bang of a mess, i mean, a legacy advantage and an idol being played AND wasted? ugh i really had the gals and gays shook and bothered!! because at least now i can blame that to feel slightly better about myself, because trust and believe if i had even just TEN MINUTES to strategize i think i couldve convinced autumn to use our idol on me because i had a feeling in my gut it was coming especially with how silent it was, i also regret not CAUSING A DAMN SCENE. I HAD 10 MINUTES TO SAVE MYSELF AND I REALLY LET MYSELF BELIEVE I WAS IN THE CLEAR AND NOW IM CLEAR-LY OUT THE GAME. foolish man. (foolish man being ME). but whatever. at least i got to clear my name from THOSE DAMN BEAUTYS, I KNEW THEY WERE GONNA BE MY UNDOING ONE WAY OR ANOTHER SINCE DAY 7. im not entirely bitter at anyone for lying to me since i was lying just as much, but ultimately i feel like for the entire season i did the best with what i had. I could be a complete fool but even now that im out of the game i STILL stand by what i said with how i feel like i played with my back against the wall for most of the game and i felt like it was truly SO hard getting people to want to work with me especially early on and FOR WHAT REASON? but whatever, it made the game interesting to me at least because i felt like they wrote me off, so i wrote my own ending. and clearly it wasnt the ending i wanted, but im surprisingly at peace with it in a weird way even just as im typing it out, i feel like for the first time in my tumblr survivor career i didnt just sit back and do nothing, i got to get my hands a little dirty, be apart of some good plays, and according to ali i actually did have some sort of a shot at winning r i p, im a really competitive person (the downside of being an aries) so the fact that i even got to play the game and enjoy making moves, i know i tried my best and that's what matters in the end!!! Also not to toot my own horn but im VERY happy i can at least say im happy with my  finishes being 3rd, 5th, 6th.. not bad for a girl with no talent! not me realizing with me getting 6th place and all these idols/advantages coming out i almost had a cirie game changers moment... ugh even more iconic. anywho AUTUMN IS THE ONLY ONE I WANT TO WIN SO SHE BETTER DO THE DAMN THING. 

hey you guys, it's me adam coming to you from post tribal where i was just voted ou- what? huh?? they didnt vote me OUT??? gorl what in the 2020 is going on here because i was shocked, i mean im THRILLED, the devil works hard but i work harder (autumn too ofc she probably did more than me actually DKJSA) - BUT im a little in awe because guess what this is the FIRST time i really just had to trust the people i have been talking with and they didnt screw me over, yet at least, i know jake was just a universal threat especially after the little stunt he pulled... so now my thoughts on that, ill tell you i was ready to go into tribal and for him to try and verbally murder me on his way out, so im glad he didnt do that but im always ready to fight so i wouldve loved the drama. kinda sad we didnt get it SDJKAF but all in all, i was all for working with jake to take down that other side, but if youre gonna burn me you better prepare for the inferno im gonna fire back, and sure the others couldve just wanted jake gone for their own plans, but i think me and autumn absolutely did THAT and thats that on that. I knew TJ was going to vote for me thanks to Kendall because me and her have truly bonded over wanting to get jake out this round for throwing both of our games into chaos, and guess what, while me and kendall may not have been talking as much before, im about to get REAL buddy buddy with her she's suddenly my bestie boo because now that we're at 6? game on. I want kendall in the end with me and i need to keep convincing her that she needs me with her and ill vote with her, and i think she's interested in it unless she's playing me because she did give me that TJ tea, which love tj as a person im actually not mad, he will just need to be voted off next still if i have anything to do with it OOP. He doesn't really fit into any of my plans, plus he's officially the only person to vote for me now except for either liam or the prejury? probably the pre jury, so now i know i probably cant trust him, but getting amir out next could also be the move, it all really depends on immunity, im gonna keep up on my appearences, get my princess diana wave on and be bestie boos with as many people as i can because my strategy at this point is to just make sure everyone believes they need me around, im not a THREAT im here to HELP you, but ultimately im only looking out for my best interest like hello its the game, and autumns too for now because she still has that idol that we can play to benefit both of us, so who the hell knows what's gonna happen live tomorrow but bring it on because im ready for a battle 

So now that that's done and I'm cute and immune, I can confirm it all. Yes I do have the merge idol, yes I've had it since Final 7 but planned not to play it until Final 5, and yes that makes me the most powerful person here. Deadass everyone wants my head on a stick and I don't give a single fuck. I'm chilling all weekend, letting them think they're doing something if/when I lose win immunity, and then I'm sending a man out on one vote Monday night. You think they hate me now? Wait til they find out they can't take a shot at me until Final 4 lmaaaaoo. Be blessed!

[carace06]

A lot of questions to fill up my ask box

1: Full name CHA

2: Zodiac sign: Gemini

3: 3 Fears: Snakes, deeeeeep ocean, pain of death

4: 3 things I love, my dog(dogs) family, food

5: 4 turns on: knee or thigh highs, lace, 

6: 4 turns off: hygiene, super needy, insane lol, and something else.

7: My best friend: I dont really know, i’ll say the guy ive known for the longest time that I still know, Adam.

8: Sexual orientation: vagina

9: My best first date: Dont remember

10: How tall am I: 5′4-5

11: What do I miss: Gordo

12: What time were I born: like 9:08 am

13: Favourite color: some kinds of green and blue

14: Do I have a crush: sure!

15: Favourite quote: Buy the ticket, take the ride.

16: Favourite place, Currently, Costa Rica, or Paris

17: Favourite food: Im a cook, how long do you have?

18: Do I use sarcasm: Never, dumb shit.

19: What am I listening to right now: Wilco, Impossible Germany

20: First thing I notice in new person: height

21: Shoe size: like 8

22: Eye color: brown

23: Hair color :brown/ dark

24: Favourite style of clothing: whatever im feeling 

25: Ever done a prank call? Used to

26: What colour of underwear I'm wearing now?Red Flannel

27: Meaning behind my URL: I have a flag in my room, and some other stuff.

28: Favourite movie: Fear and loathing, big lebowski, Snatch, into the wild, plentyyy of others

29: Favourite song: dont even ask

30: Favourite band: dont even

31: How I feel right now: very buzzed,and a hurricane is coming!

32: Someone I love: Wrigley, and family

33: My current relationship status: technically single

34: My relationship with my parents: great

35: Favourite holiday: halloween or christmas

36: Tattoos and piercing i have: tattoo on back. wanna get some added

37: Tattoos and piercing i want: look up

38: The reason I joined Tumblr: neighbor

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?: nope

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? yep!

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? No!

42: When did I last hold hands? dont know

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? depends on what im Getting ready for..... could take 2 min.

44: Have I shaved your legs in the past three days? every day

45: Where am I right now? couch in austin texas

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? myself

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? usually loud, again depends

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? no

49: Am I excited for anything? Football season, and the boxing fight haha

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? usually

51: How often do I wear a fake smile? Its part of my job

52: When was the last time I hugged someone? today

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? have fun

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? probably 

55: What is something I disliked about today?working

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? Keith Richards?, though ive heard hes a dick.... Jeff tweedy maybe. 

57: What do I think about most? Life

58: What’s my strangest talent? Drumming?

59: Do I have any strange phobias? Snakes

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? both

61: What was the last lie I told? i was late to work

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online?either

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?both yes

64: Do I believe in magic? to an extent

65: Do I believe in luck? sure

66: What's the weather like right now?Hurricane Harvey bitch

67: What was the last book I've read? Im Reading “Meet me in the Bathroom”

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? Yes

69: Do I have any nicknames? yep. Avocado, Boodah.

70: What was the worst injury I've ever had? Getting Stabbed in the back

71: Do I spend money or save it? both  try to save more

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge? nope fuck your tongue

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me? no

74: Favourite animal? Dog, Cub bear, Panda, 

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM working and drinking

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? Natas

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? Never gonna give you up

78: How can you win my heart? be someone with the initials AS

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? .......

80: What is my favorite word? Rigmarole

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr: meh

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?: Be Nice to everybody God Damnit!

83: Do I have any relatives in jail? No

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? Well youre probably pooping some cool color.... but eh, itd be dope to fly and see people and places.

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? Do you like quizzes

86: What is my current desktop picture?Amber Sherman

87: Had sex? yes

88: Bought condoms?yes

89: Gotten pregnant?close

90: Failed a class?yes

91: Kissed a boy?yes

92: Kissed a girl?yes

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? yes

94: Had job? plenty

95: Left the house without my wallet? Alot

96: Bullied someone on the internet? Tried not to

97: Had sex in public? “define public” (AS) lame answer. yes, at least somewhat, not in front of people tho. 

98: Played on a sports team?yes

99: Smoked weed? plenty

100: Did drugs? yes

101: Smoked cigarettes? dont, but yes

102: Drank alcohol? plenty, and currently

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? nope

104: Been overweight? nah

105: Been underweight? dont think

106: Been to a wedding? yes

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? probably

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? maybe

109: Been outside my home country? yes

110: Gotten my heart broken? yes

111: Been to a professional sports game? yes

112: Broken a bone? possibly 

113: Cut myself? just once to see

114: Been to prom? nope!

115: Been in airplane? many

116: Fly by helicopter? no

117: What concerts have I been to? they wouldnt fit here

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? nah

119: Learned another language? tried

120: Wore make up? yea

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? yes

122: Had oral sex? yes

123: Dyed my hair? yes

124: Voted in a presidential election? yes

125: Rode in an ambulance? yes, stabbed

126: Had a surgery? yes

127: Met someone famous? yes

128: Stalked someone on a social network? yep

129: Peed outside? Austin Pee Party

130: Been fishing? yes

131: Helped with charity? yes

132: Been rejected by a crush? yes

133: Broken a mirror? yes

134: What do I want for birthday? Have fun

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? who knows

136: Was I named after anyone? Yes family history

137: Do I like my handwriting? meh not always

138: What was my favourite toy as a child? something teenage mutant ninja turtle

139: Favourite Tv Show? wayyyyy too many  ill say Breaking bad

140: Where do I want to live when older? who knows, maybe Austin, if it stops changing.

141: Play any musical instrument? drums, percussion

142: One of my scars, how did I get it? i was stabbed in the back, god damn dude

143: Favourite pizza toping? pep, or canadian bacon

144: Am I afraid of the dark? nah

145: Am I afraid of heights? nah though depends 

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?: plenty

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? of course

148: What I'm really bad at: answering questions

149: What my greatest achievments are: living

150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me: this question

151: What I'd do if I won in a lottery: I’d have plans

152: What do I like about myself: hard working.

153: My closest Tumblr friend: @falling-stars8675

154: Something I fantasise about: @falling-stars8675

155: Any question you'd like: @falling-stars8675

There you go @falling-stars8675

let me know what ya think!

[flirting-with-psychology]

Why did you close the door the last time you closed one? I think it was the bathroom door, and that’s pretty obvious why Stripes or polka dots? Polka dots Do you care if people touch you when they’re talking to you? Depends on the person. If it’s my crush then definitely yes. But I don’t want to be touched by some annoying people What is your gender? Female Do you think that people think its obvious? Generally, although sometimes I get insecure that my face looks too masculine especially when I’m not wearing makeup

How long did your first date last? I can’t remember what my first date was Is your favorite color within 10 feet of you? Yes Highlight of your day? The Crown and the Flame finale Would you rather be on a boat or a plane? Boat Can you tell when girls (or guys) have eyeliner on? Usually Can you cook? Nope How high is your ceiling? Normal height Whats the worst job you can think of? Sewage worker  Do you swear a lot? Hell yes Does the last person you texted have an O in their name? Yes Is everything working in your house? I’m not Would you rather have a pool or a trampoline? Pool Does pop give you energy? Sometimes TV show you love with a passion? Pushing Daisies Do you think you learned anything from the worst night of your life? Not sure what I would consider the “worst night of my life”

Perfect age to get married? Of course it depend on the relationship but probably late 20s

Is it safe to say you own over 20 pairs of shoes? Possibly Name a career path that women are known for taking. Fashion designer Favorite type of cookie? Cookie dough  A quality you look for in choosing a significant other? Sense of humor What would I find if I looked in your pocket? Nothing What was your first word? No idea A musical instrument you wouldnt mind learning how to play? Maybe drums Last time you went to 7-eleven? Can’t remember A fast food restaurant that you hate with a passion? There are none I particularly hate. There are some that I don’t really like because I don’t like the food Does everyone in your family have a job? No Going anywhere this weekend? Not that I know of Is your room ever clean? Yeah for like a day after I clean it What does it mean when youre being quiet? If I’m with people, it means I can’t think of anything to say, but if I’m just home chilling around parents or roommates it just means I’m taking a break Last person you had a face to face conversation with? My dad Wheres your phone? On the table Do you know the difference between your and youre? Yes How late did you stay up last night? Like 2:30  Anyone youre ready to kill? No Do you need to get a tan? I’m fine What do you want? A boyfriend Favorite TV show as a kid? Clifford and Arthur

Whats a show that you absolutely refuse to watch? Steven Universe. It may not be a bad show but the fans are just so annoying How many times have you been in love? Not sure Go camping or go to a party? Party Do you remember how old you were when you started swearing? Probably like high school. I hated swearwords when I was a kid How many years older than you would you date someone? A few. But I wouldn’t want someone who’s in a dramatically different place in life What was the last thing you pinky swore on? Can’t remember Would you consider yourself a nice person? Sometimes Are there a lot of mirrors in your house? A normal amount Has there ever been a serial killer in your house? Not that I know of

Do you know anyone who looks like Adam Sandler? No True or false: Glee is annoying. False Last thing you cooked? Ravioli Do you use slang often? Sure Wear glasses? Yes

About how old was the last person that hit on you? Wouldn’t necessarily call it hitting on me, but the last person who talked to me who I think likes me is 22 I believe What color are your headphones? White Would you make a good teacher? Why? Not sure. I like kids but I don’t like speaking in front of large groups Dont you hate those commercials that try too hard? Not if they’re funny. I do hate seeing the same commercial all the time though Is the fan on? Yes Any special reason why youre taking this survey? No What does the last text message you sent say? Yeah there were two different troops of them I guess

Your friend needs you to run to the store to get a pregnancy test. Do you? Sure if I’m not busy Do you log out on facebook when you leave the site? No What color are your underwear? Turquoise I think How short are your nails? They vary. The shortest just ripped at the base and the longest is just over half a cm Do you like the opposite sex to be dominant or you the one in control? I like a balance Favorite holiday? Halloween If I asked you to point to Ohio on a map of the US do you think you could? Yes Youre locked in a room with spiders. Do you have an issue? UM YEAH I HAVE A HUGE ISSUE WITH THAT. <Same Do you wear your most expensive item of clothing often? No, it’s probably my prom dress Do you eat a lot of food? I don’t eat lots of foods but I eat a lot of the ones I do like

Have your parents ever tried to control your relationship? No Have you ever had to give someone directions before? Yeah Speaking of which, are you good at understanding driving directions? No, I’m terrible How many people do you text daily? Like one or two Do you play any instruments? Which instruments do you play? Clarinet Is there anyone who you call by their last name? There were some guys I used to because everyone did What did you do on your last birthday? Football game Which of the Seven Deadly Sins do you commit the most? Lust. Is it still a sin if you don’t get to act on it? Has anyone ever told you that you’re incapable of whispering? No, but I know that I am when I’m drunk What is your least favorite subject in school? P.E. Have you ever been involved in a custody battle before? No Do you know a couple who constantly sucks on each other’s face? No When was the last time you watched a YouTube video? Yesterday Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before? No, that scares me When was the last time you held someone’s hand? Not sure. Romantically, I think I briefly held my 6th grade crush’s hand when we went out in May How many meals have you eaten today, so far? Like one and a half  Do you think it’s stupid for people to call others “hot?” No..? I do kind of think it’s stupid for people to get offended by it though Do you personally think Wikipedia is a reliable source? Reliable enough for the type of homework I need it for Have you ever shopped at Wet Seal before? Did you like it? No Do you care about spending money if it’s someone else’s money? Yeah, I feel awkward letting them buy me things I wouldn’t buy for myself What is your favorite Disney movie of all time? Aladdin or Hercules or Tangled When you were a child, did you ever want to become a wizard/witch? Yes Would you rather have hardwood floors or carpet? Carpet Who was the last person you yelled at? Why? My mom over train travel probably As a kid, did you ever go to camp? Yeah sometimes Have you ever made out in a movie theater before? No, I want to actually watch the movie Are you currently trying to learn to play any instrument? I play clarinet, but I haven’t done much learning in awhile When was the last time you went somewhere you thought was haunted? Never really Who was the last person to compliment you? One of my parents How old were you when you got to go on your first date? Like 13 Would you call your parents over-protective or under-protective? Over protective Did your parents ever let you play in the pits of those multicolored balls? Yeah Have any of your siblings ever had a crush on your significant other? Don’t have siblings or a significant other Are you the jealous type? I can be When was the last time you felt like you were high on life? I used to think that when my friends and I would goof off in middle school Do you know someone who cares about themselves more than their child? According to my mom, my grandma can be like that sometimes Do you still watch cartoons on television? Not really What do you usually order at Taco Bell, if you go there? I’d probably order a quesadilla Is there anyone currently annoying you? Not at the moment Do you have freckles? No How many dogs do you have, if any at all? None  Have you ever witnessed someone being beaten up? No Do you think biting is weird or sexy? Can be sexy, if not too hard. I think sometimes I become a biter when I’m not thinking about it Would you rather be called hot or beautiful? Beautiful Have you ever had a pet turtle before? No, but we had some as class pets in 4th grade Do you still sleep with your parents when you’re scared sometimes? No that’s weird Have you ever met someone with two different color eyes? No Have you ever felt like someone was following you? Yes What color shirt are you wearing at the moment? Black with patterns Do you enjoy going school shopping? Yeah I miss that Do you think Pug dogs are adorable or just plain ugly? They’re okay Have you ever met someone who completely resembled their pet? No haha

What was the worst substance you’ve spilled on yourself before? Not really a spill but I got bird poop on me the other day Have you ever made out with more than one person in one night? Yes Do you think there is a soulmate out there for everyone? I’m not sure

Do you like short or long surveys the best? Long Have you ever bought fake money and tried to make it pass for real? No Are your siblings nice the majority of the time? N/A Do you freak out when a thunderstorm comes along? No How often do you shower? Every day usually Have you ever had to sell something for a school fundraiser? Yeah, all sorts How many sodas do you usually drink in one day? None Have you ever met someone who was completely weird all-around? Yup Do you ever watch any soap operas? No Have you ever met someone who was mean to everyone? Not really Do you usually have a low tolerance for pain or high tolerance? Not sure. Probably average Would you rather eat or sleep? Eat Are you one of those die hard Twilight or Harry Potter fans? Harry Potter

Do your parents ever force you to talk to your grandparents? Sometimes, I’m bad at keeping in touch Do you think long surveys are boring or entertaining? Depends if the questions are good Have you ever learned that someone had lied to you all along? Not sure if it was all along Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer? Maybe very briefly Have you ever had to bail someone out of jail before? No Is there anyone in your immediate family who was adopted? No Do you know anyone who doesn’t have any common sense? The president When was the last time you bought something? Monday Do you think you look anything like your parents? Yes What are your plans for this weekend? Nothing yet What color is your significant other’s hair? I’m single Have you ever applied for a job at Walmart before? No Would you ever become a foster parent? Probably not Are you ashamed of anyone in your family? Sometimes I get ashamed of my parents Would rather talk to someone on a landline or a cell phone? Cell phone Has anyone ever given you a psychiatric assessment? Yes What is your favorite amusement park? Water World Did you ever have braces? Yes, it sucked What is cuter: kisses on the forehead of the cheek? Forehead Do you believe in evolution or creation? Evolution Would you rather take a bath or a shower? Why or why not? Shower because the water stays hot and it’s easier to wash Does it bother you when people touch your personal items? Depends what it is. If it’s fragile then yeah, but if not then I don’t mind because then I get to show it off When was the last time you did something sexual? May Do you collect anything? What? Kinda collect shotglasses Are you better at hand-drawing things or painting? Hand drawing I guess  Have either of your parents ever called you a failure before? No Have you ever suspected someone of cheating on you? No because that would require a relationship When you get married, will you convert your last name? Depends on what his last name is  Are your parents divorced, married or separated? Divorced Has someone ever left a relationship with you for someone else? Not to my knowledge What’s the most painful thing you’ve ever experienced? Orthodontics When was the last time you went shoe shopping? Maybe the winter?  Are you a part of any clubs at your school, if you still go to school? I was in marching band Do you know someone who wears a wig? My grandpa did When was the last time you cried? For what reason? Not sure if I really cried, but I got close because of a fight with my mom What is your favorite shop to go to at the mall? Fancy dress shops What time do you usually go to bed on the weekends? Like 4 Have you ever considered suicide? Not seriously Have you ever been raped before? No Would you ever consider becoming a marine biologist? No Did you carry a lunchbox as a child? Yes What is your favorite ‘sweet’ to eat? Chocolate Are you someone who usually eats when you’re bored? Yeah unfortunately Have you ever eaten your way through a breakup? Probably. I know I stress-eat Who was the last person you texted? My mom. Do you usually buy popcorn when you eat at the movie theater? No, but if someone else buys I eat it Did you sleep alone or with someone last night? Alone. What kind of dressing do you eat on your salad, if any? None Are you someone who constantly likes to wear hats? No, I like them but not all the time Have you ever seen a Lifetime movie that relates to your life? Probably What is your Myspace URL? Didn’t have one Are you someone who likes to wear dresses more than pants? Yes I love dresses! Have you ever dated someone who was way overprotective of you? No What was the last thing you touched besides your keyboard? My phone When was the last time you witnessed a fist fight? Don’t know if I have Do you know anyone who lives in the state of California? Yeah a lot of people

Are you waiting for a text right now? No Is it your summer vacation right now? yeah Do you like traveling? I do What color are the walls of the room you’re in right now? Off-white Do you still make mix cds? No Are you eating or drinking anything right now? No

Do you go to church regularly? No Are you determined? Not enough

Are you always looking for/in a relationship, or do you like being single? Always looking, never in  Ever had your heart broken? Yes Even broken someone else’s heart? Maybe Are you confident? Eh When’s the last time you smiled? Today probably Are you tan? Kinda

Any big plans for today/tonight? No What’s the background on your computer? A reflection illusion Do you have days where you just want to listen to sad songs? Yes Don’t you hate when your plans fall through? Yeah Ever maxed out a credit card? No How old are you? 22 Who’s the last person you kissed? My 6th grade crush in May Are you hoping they will also be the next person you kiss? No, because I don’t think I’ll see him again for awhile and I’d hate to wait that long Do you ever actually go on dates? Sometimes

[crazykendal]

This is too long

Why did you close the door the last time you closed one? so no little kids would rampage in Stripes or polka dots? stripes Do you care if people touch you when they’re talking to you? depends on who What is your gender? female Do you think that people think its obvious? i sure hope so haha

How long did your first date last? 0 seconds ;) Is your favorite color within 10 feet of you? yes Highlight of your day? my old friend came over Would you rather be on a boat or a plane? dood no boats those scare the f outta me, but ive never been on a plane Can you tell when girls (or guys) have eyeliner on? yes. Can you cook?

yikes uh.. nope How high is your ceiling? i believe 35 feet im some parts of the house Whats the worst job you can think of? honestly idk Do you swear a lot?  what the fuck are you talking about Does the last person you texted have an O in their name? HA no Is everything working in your house? i dont think so Would you rather have a pool or a trampoline? pool. Does pop give you energy? no..? TV show you love with a passion? the walking dead, and ive been watching the 100, but i love twd  a lot more Do you think you learned anything from the worst night of your life? yeah, im a fucking prick/dick head

Perfect age to get married? who the fuck knows

Is it safe to say you own over 20 pairs of shoes?  i own 3 or maybe 5.. i think Name a career path that women are known for taking. doctors?? idk Favorite type of cookie? chocolate chip, i can never make them because i always come close to burning the house down A quality you look for in choosing a significant other? if anyone can understand me im good What would I find if I looked in your pocket? no pockets What was your first word? yo wassup my homies. (I say that too much, but I have no idea) A musical instrument you wouldnt mind learning how to play? DRUMSSS Last time you went to 7-eleven? months ago A fast food restaurant that you hate with a passion? I kinda hate most of them equally Does everyone in your family have a job? yeah Going anywhere this weekend? im going to a legally blonde musical Is your room ever clean? yeah but usually never What does it mean when youre being quiet? im mad Last person you had a face to face conversation with? my cat Wheres your phone? dude idk ive been grounded for 2 weeks ahahahah Do you know the difference between your and you’re? yes i aint no dumb bitch How late did you stay up last night? 10 pm Anyone youre ready to kill? oh hell yeah Do you need to get a tan? yes What do you want? money and love Favorite TV show as a kid? dood idk

Whats a show that you absolutely refuse to watch? Strangers Things How many times have you been in love? once Go camping or go to a party? camping Do you remember how old you were when you started swearing? maybe when I was 12 How many years older than you would you date someone? I would like to date anyone in my grade, nothing over or less What was the last thing you pinky swore on? I dont swear to anything, ever, unless i care about the person usually more than my self Would you consider yourself a nice person? no. why is this even a question Are there a lot of mirrors in your house?  a lot more than I think there should be Has there ever been a serial killer in your house?  I sure hope not

Do you know anyone who looks like Adam Sandler? no True or false: Glee is annoying. true, ive never watched it but I know its annoying Last thing you cooked? grilled cheese Do you use slang often? maybe Wear glasses? yes hahahaha

About how old was the last person that hit on you? well.. no one has ever hit on me OH wait I cant say (this one girl maybe I don't her well oh god) What color are your headphones? black and red BLUETOOTH BITCHES Would you make a good teacher? Why? I would rather be some sort of leader than teacher Dont you hate those commercials that try too hard? lol some commercials are my life, like the life alert commercials. HELP IVE FALLEN AND I CANT GET UP but yeah some over them are just to much Is the fan on? I have like a ton of fans on right now Any special reason why youre taking this survey? i have nothing better to do What does the last text message you sent say?  i was telling my mom that my little sister was being a pain in the ass and that i wanted pizza hahaha

Your friend needs you to run to the store to get a pregnancy test. Do you? which friend? Friend #1, id ask her who she fucked and be really surprised. Friend #2 I wouldn't even have to ask. Friend #3 I would be shocked and possibly upset. But id get them for all of them hahahaha Do you log out on facebook when you leave the site?  i dont use my Facebook What color are your underwear? white How short are your nails? short Do you like the opposite sex to be dominant or you the one in control? funny you ask that, id rather have the opposite sex dominant and id rather be dominant with same sex.. yep Favorite holiday? Christmas If I asked you to point to Ohio on a map of the US do you think you could? yeah You're locked in a room with spiders. Do you have an issue? spiders don't really bother me, depends on size tho Do you wear your most expensive item of clothing often? uhh Do you eat a lot of food? no THERE'S NO FOOD IN OUR HOUSE

Have your parents ever tried to control your relationship? well like a relationship relationship? maybe Have you ever had to give someone directions before? yes i forget everything but I know how to give directions like a mastermind Speaking of which, are you good at understanding driving directions? ive never driven before because im too little!! in two years i can tho hahah How many people do you text daily? usually none Do you play any instruments? Which instruments do you play? nothing Is there anyone who you call by their last name? no What did you do on your last birthday? I dont remember I think I had a sleepover tho Which of the Seven Deadly Sins do you commit the most? what Has anyone ever told you that you’re incapable of whispering? no What is your least favorite subject in school?

math and science Have you ever been involved in a custody battle before? depends Do you know a couple who constantly sucks on each other’s face? what the actual fuck When was the last time you watched a YouTube video? a few days ago Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before? no

When was the last time you held someone’s hand? does my cat count How many meals have you eaten today, so far? none and it’s 1:05 pm Do you think it’s stupid for people to call others “hot?” no because they might actually be hot hahaha Do you personally think Wikipedia is a reliable source? yeahhh? depends Have you ever shopped at Wet Seal before? Did you like it? wtf is that Do you care about spending money if it’s someone else’s money? yeah What is your favorite Disney movie of all time? dude I dont really like Disney movies so none When you were a child, did you ever want to become a wizard/witch? wtf no Would you rather have hardwood floors or carpet? i have both in my house Who was the last person you yelled at? Why? my little little sister As a kid, did you ever go to camp? no Have you ever made out in a movie theater before? no Are you currently trying to learn to play any instrument? no. When was the last time you went somewhere you thought was haunted? hmm a few months ago Who was the last person to compliment you? idk that was over a month ago How old were you when you got to go on your first date? never have and I bet I never will :( Would you call your parents over-protective or under-protective? over protective helpppp Did your parents ever let you play in the pits of those multicolored balls? what Have any of your siblings ever had a crush on your significant other? chandler riggs or alycia debnam-carey? Are you the jealous type? yeah When was the last time you felt like you were high on life? when clarke and lexa had sex mwahahaha what Do you know someone who cares about themselves more than their child? yeah haha we have their kid now Do you still watch cartoons on television? no What do you usually order at Taco Bell, if you go there?  i dont like taco bell Is there anyone currently annoying you? yes Do you have freckles? no :’( How many dogs do you have, if any at all? imaginary doggos Have you ever witnessed someone being beaten up? i couldn't say I witnessed someone being beat up I usually beat up things Do you think biting is weird or sexy? well it depends on who Would you rather be called hot or beautiful? hot but im neither hahaha Have you ever had a pet turtle before? yes Do you still sleep with your parents when you’re scared sometimes? no. Have you ever met someone with two different color eyes? nope. Have you ever felt like someone was following you? yeah

What color shirt are you wearing at the moment? white Do you enjoy going school shopping? sometimes Do you think Pug dogs are adorable or just plain ugly? I LOVE PUGS my grandpa has some and I love them so much Have you ever met someone who completely resembled their pet? haha ive never thought of that but maybe What was the worst substance you’ve spilled on yourself before? bleach Have you ever made out with more than one person in one night? no Do you think there is a soulmate out there for everyone? no defiantly not me

Do you like short or long surveys the best? long Have you ever bought fake money and tried to make it pass for real? no Are your siblings nice the majority of the time? depends on who Do you freak out when a thunderstorm comes along? no i live for thunderstorms How often do you shower? every other day Have you ever had to sell something for a school fundraiser? maybe How many sodas do you usually drink in one day? sometimes one but usually never Have you ever met someone who was completely weird all-around? yes shes a good friend of mine Do you ever watch any soap operas? i have no idea what that is Have you ever met someone who was mean to everyone? yes. (me) thats not trueee though <3 Do you usually have a low tolerance for pain or high tolerance? I dont care whenever I get injured Would you rather eat or sleep? i dont care Are you one of those die hard Twilight or Harry Potter fans? no just no

Do your parents ever force you to talk to your grandparents? I have one grandpa and a step grandma and I dont really know her that much but I never really see them Do you think long surveys are boring or entertaining? it depends on the questions. Have you ever learned that someone had lied to you all along? i feel like someone has been lying to me but I dont know if its true or not Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer? no. Have you ever had to bail someone out of jail before? no. Is there anyone in your immediate family who was adopted? yeah Do you know anyone who doesn’t have any common sense? yes my same weird friend, oh and me :) When was the last time you bought something? Monday Do you think you look anything like your parents? kinda What are your plans for this weekend? i answered this What color is your significant other’s hair? Chandler Riggs and Alycia Debnam-Carey both have brown hair. Woah ive never thought about this but every single person ive ever crushed on was a brunette Have you ever applied for a job at Walmart before? no. Would you ever become a foster parent? id rather be a foster parent than give birth but I fucking hate kids (maybe that's why I hate myself) Are you ashamed of anyone in your family? yeah my cat Bub he attacks my other cats Would rather talk to someone on a landline or a cell phone? cell Has anyone ever given you a psychiatric assessment? no What is your favorite amusement park?  i dont know Did you ever have braces? I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET THEM OFF THIS MONTH BUT NOOOOOO What is cuter: kisses on the forehead of the cheek? i like both? why am I answering to this Do you believe in evolution or creation? evolution, there was never a god who created anything

Would you rather take a bath or a shower? Why or why not? shower, I dont have time for baths Does it bother you when people touch your personal items? depends. When was the last time you did something sexual? ..depends on what.. Do you collect anything? What? snapbacks Are you better at hand-drawing things or painting? I cant paint to save my life Have either of your parents ever called you a failure before? oh my god all the time! They tell me that more than compliments Have you ever suspected someone of cheating on you? no. When you get married, will you convert your last name? depends on who :) Are your parents divorced, married or separated? married Has someone ever left a relationship with you for someone else? no. What’s the most painful thing you’ve ever experienced? from december 5, 2002 all the way to today When was the last time you went shoe shopping? like 4 weeks ago Are you a part of any clubs at your school, if you still go to school? like in 7th grade CREATIVE WRITING CLUB oh man Do you know someone who wears a wig? no What is your best friend’s last name? nakamura. its my cat haru When was the last time you cried? For what reason? awhile ago because im a fucking baby, just because im going to a different school than a friend of mine who im going to tag mwahaha sucks to be you IM LOOKING BACK AT THIS ITS NOT TRUE IT WAS THE LEXA DEATH SCENE

What is your favorite shop to go to at the mall? forever 21 What time do you usually go to bed on the weekends? like 10 or 11 Have you ever considered suicide? not much? Have you ever been raped before? no. Would you ever consider becoming a marine biologist? no if i ever see those words again im going to fuck someone up. (my dad wants me to be one but im deathly afraid or the ocean) Did you carry a lunchbox as a child? yes. What is your favorite ‘sweet’ to eat? idk Are you someone who usually eats when you’re bored? no Have you ever eaten your way through a breakup? no. Who was the last person you texted? my mom Do you usually buy popcorn when you eat at the movie theater? yeah Did you sleep alone or with someone last night? alone. What kind of dressing do you eat on your salad, if any? none Are you someone who constantly likes to wear hats? no what are talking about im not wearing a hat at all Have you ever seen a Lifetime movie that relates to your life? what What is your Myspace URL? never had one Are you someone who likes to wear dresses more than pants? hahaha if i ever have to wear another dress again im going to kill myself Have you ever dated someone who was way overprotective of you? never fucking dated alright What was the last thing you touched besides your keyboard? my HAT When was the last time you witnessed a fist fight? never..? Do you know anyone who lives in the state of California? bitch I do

Are you waiting for a text right now? no Is it your summer vacation right now? yepp fucking kill me Do you like traveling? love it, more time I can listen to to musicccc What color are the walls of the room you’re in right now? dood i think grey, im looking now and its hard to tell Do you still make mix cds? no. Are you eating or drinking anything right now? no

Do you go to church regularly? no i dont believe in that stuff Who’s your best friend? haru Are you determined? yeahhh...

Are you always looking for/in a relationship, or do you like being single? id love to be in a relationship but i hate so many people and a ton of people hate me and I bet i never will Ever had your heart broken? yeah Even broken someone else’s heart? oh god yes Are you confident? not really When’s the last time you smiled? today. Are you tan? no

Any big plans for today/tonight? I want pizza What’s the background on your computer? oh I recently changed it to lexa and clarke from the 100 Do you have days where you just want to listen to sad songs? yeah Don’t you hate when your plans fall through? sometimes Ever maxed out a credit card? no How old are you? older than time itself Who’s the last person you kissed? my cat Are you hoping they will also be the next person you kiss? no Do you ever actually go on dates? no

Im going to tag @rottentulips because I finally found a really long question tag for her to do so you're welcome ;)