#Also I dont particularly like to eat out either so eh... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

etherealino · 5 years ago

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problems – lmh

synopsis: you would always have problems on minho’s girlfriends. that was until you realized you were the problem.

genre: college au. f2l. fluff, angst.

warning(s): cursing, you might cringe at how cliché this is

word count: 6,920 omg pls be proud

a/n: bullet point form. i’ll write in bullet point if i can’t seem to find it in myself to write in a whole ass paragraph form. bear with me, this is the first time im actually posting a full ass fic hdfbdfj for skz, that is. please dont let me flop thanks :<

you and minho are the very best friends

since high school

you don’t even remember how the two of you became best friends

all you remember is that one day, you’re laughing so hard at his jokes

and ever since that, you two were inseparable

whenever minho’s absent, you would be on the corner sulking

other kids would be offering you to come with them

but no you wanted minho :((

but you also didn’t want to be rude so you end up going with them

lmao you

but when you were the one who’s absent, minho would be pouting all day

he won’t talk bcs he wants you to be the one whom he tells his stupid jokes to

but he would go with the other kids too

but he would still be pouting

when you both graduated, you both went camping

went to the highest place you both know

watched the sunrise together

but now you two are in college

it’s also when minho started to go out

every month, different girl

minho would always introduce them to you

minho’s eyes would always light up as you and the girl would talk

and when she leaves

minho would ask for your opinion

but you always answered the same

“my opinion doesn’t matter, go date who you want to.”

and minho would always response the same

he pouts

you don’t know why either

but you would always just find a problem

each

and

every

girl

dates

one was kinda mean

one was possessive of minho

one eats loudly (do that in front of me and i’ll kick you to mars)

one was too snobby

one was too shy

and everytime

it’s always the girl who breaks up with him

and everytime you ask him, he would response the same

“we just don’t click” and then minho would smile

and here you are now, in jisung’s dorm

ranting on him about a girl minho is now currently dating

you sat on his computer chair as he sat on his bed

you were a bit shrunk down

arms resting on the armrest

on thumb on your teeth as you looked at the ground

“are you sure she’s the problem?” jisung asks

you looked up at him, an eyebrow raised in confusion

“who else would be? minho? minho does nothing but to please the girl. it was irritating to watch. i could slap the hell out of her.” you said

you weren’t a war freak

but with minho, you could go into war just for him

jisung chuckles. “not minho.” jisung says and then he points at you

“me?!” you said. “why me?”

jisung smiles, “how the hell do you manage to find a problem in each and every girl minho dates?” jisung asks. “i mean, so far the most stupid i’ve heard from you was the girl was too kind. seriously, y/n.”

“but it was true! she was too kind, it’s too irritating. and when you look at her do her good deeds, it doesn’t even seem sincere.” you ranted, glaring at the ground

jisung looks at you. “are you hearing yourself?”

“obviously,” you said, rolling your eyes

jisung giggles. “seriously, y/n. think about it. how the hell do you manage to find a problem on each and every single girl that minho dates?”

you sigh, looking at the ceiling

“i just want someone who would treat minho right. i want someone who deserves him.” you said

“and what kind of girl is that?” jisung asks

“the opposite of the girls he dated.” you answered, looking at him

“you?” jisung says and you just stared at him

“what are you implying?” you asked

“that you’re in love with your best friend.” jisung says

you stared at jisung, silence falling the atmosphere as jisung only smiles at you

you were unable to speak

you never thought of that

but no, you’re not in love with your best friend

you’re just shocked that jisung would assume that

the silent atmosphere was mixed with a tension

you don’t know what to say

you don’t know what to do

“HELLO, JISUNG!” hyunjin greets as he slams the door open

you blinked twice, standing up as you picked your wallet and phone from the computer desk

“oh, hi, y/n.” hyunjin greets with a grin. “what are you talking about? minho again?”

there are times when hyunjin would be with you and jisung when talking about minho

and being honest, jisung and hyunjin were the ones who you trusted the most

other than minho

but mainly about the minho fiasco

hyunjin and jisung looked at each other

jisung smiling at hyunjin and then hyunjin gets it

“oh, finally realized that you’re in love with minho?” hyunjin asked

and you grabbed a pillow from jisung’s bed, throwing it at hyunjin

“i’m not in love with minho. ew.” you said, dramtically shuddering

“deny it all you want, everyone could see it, love.” hyunjin says, winking at you

jisung laughs and you lightly punch jisung on the arm

“i’ll be going now.” you said with a sigh

“good night, y/n.” jisung says

“good night, mrs. lee—i mean, ms. y/l/n.” hyunjin teasingly said

you punched hyunjin on his arm as you past by him

he dramatically falls on his bed, clutching on his arm

“ouch!” hyunjin shrieked

“good night, boys. thank you.” you said

“anytime.” jisung says as he stands up and tackles hyunjin on the bed

you giggle lightly as you closed the door of their dorm

you turn to the direction of your dorm

and you immediately plopped into your bed since you were on your pajamas already before you left to go to jisung’s and hyunjin’s

you thought to yourself as you lay there

are you really in love with your best friend?

you shuddered at the thought and turned to your side

you see the cat plushie minho gave you on your birthday

you sigh as you hugged it

you close your eyes as jisung’s word repeated again and again in your head

“are you sure she’s the problem?”

nonetheless, you let slumber take you

for weeks you watched minho go around, pleasing the girl

you could see right through minho that he gets irritated by it

but still he faced you with a smile

you were mad

what riled you up the most is when you and minho were having lunch together and she rudely went up to minho to force him to do her homework because she has to go out tonight

i repeat, force

not ask

you see minho look at her blankly

you trust minho enough to know his self-worth

“i can’t,” minho says. “i have my own homework.”

“so? do it both.” she says and minho rolls his eyes

“i can’t. i have a lot on my plate right now.” minho calmly says and she rolls her eyes

“have a lot on your plate?” she repeats and then she turns to you. “why do you keep hanging out with her—looking time to hang out with her if you ‘have a lot on your plate’?”

“not here.” minho grits as he shakes his head

minho’s girlfriend rolls her eyes and leaves the both of you

you were stunned, but you were so irritated

you could feel minho’s eyes on you but you looked down at your food

“i swear, she used to be nice when we first started dating.” minho says, probably read through you that you were getting mad

“i’m not mad at you, don’t worry.” you said and a sigh leaves your lips

“i don’t even understand. she used to be really nice.” minho says with a sigh

“i never saw it.” you admitted and minho looks at you

“when you introduced me to her, all you did was try and please her so she wouldn’t get pissed or something. i knew it from the very start.” you said and minho nods

“why didn’t you say anything?” minho asks

“i told you, it’s your life. date who you wanna date.” you said. “you probably must’ve seen something in her that i didn’t.”

it was the first time you voiced out to minho that you have a problem with his girlfriend

should you tell him about the past ones as well?

eh, it doesn’t matter

minho nods, understanding your point of view

later that night, you crashed once again in hyunjin’s and jisung’s dorm

“just admit it, y/n.” jisung says. “you’re in love with your best friend.”

“i don’t have anything to admit because that is not how i feel.” you said and hyunjin snickers

“i never heard any other problem from but minho.” hyunjin says and you stare at him

“well, he’s my best friend.” you said with a pout

“whom you’re in love with.” jisung says and you sigh, shaking your head

then your phone dings

you look down to see minho messaged

“can we hang out? are you in your dorm?”

you immediately stood up from jisung’s computer chair

hyunjin’s and jisung’s eyes on you

but you stopped your movements

you stare at minho’s message, then towards you, particularly at nothing

“what is it, y/n?” hyunjin asks

and then another ding

“hey, where are you? i’m outside your dorm.”

most likely, it’s another breakup

you would lie to yourself when you say that you’re not tired of it anymore

you’d always run to your dorm just to see if minho’s alright

you’d always drop everything that you’re doing just for minho

even if he just woke you up at 3 in the morning

you typed a reply, hitting send as you sat back on jisung’s chair

“i’m sorry, i can’t, min. :( i’m in my friend’s dorm. she needs help with something.”

if you were being honest, you’d always drop any friend that needs your help just to go to minho

you locked your phone, putting it in silent mode as you placed it on jisung’s desk behind you

you turned to hyunjin and jisung who were curious at your sudden movements

“so how have you guys been?” you asked them

“what happened, y/n?” jisung asks

“nothing, it’s just, hyunjin’s right.” you said and hyunjin raises an eyebrow. “enough about minho, enough about me. how are you two?”

hyunjijn and jisung looked at each other with doubt in their eyes

but they thought it was good for you to take your mind off of minho, too

so, they talked

“i woke up with a big lizard on my head.” jisung answers

the next morning you found out his girlfriend broke up with minho

it was the best for minho anyway

you hung out less with minho

but you still reserved lunch for him

but that was it

but it was also very hard

when minho happens to bump into you during your vacant

the thing you hate the most is most of your vacant is his as well

you only have one vacant that didn’t much with minho’s

so, you saved those time slots for minho

vacant periods and lunch

,,,,, and weekends

it was hard to avoid minho

you don’t even know why are you avoiding minho

so here you two are

saturday night after you both went around town to forget all the stress that college gives

you and minho were laying on your bed, bodies facing each other with an arm underneath your head, same with minho

watching three stooges

minho giggles loudly at one scene

“i remembered when you and i were messing around and then suddenly your index and middle fingers were coming for my eyes. i really thought you were going to hit my eyes.” minho says with his giggles that you love so much, your heartstrings tugging

what

“i got the trick from this movie.” you informed him and minho hums

“remember when i put chili in your—“

your eyes shifted on minho, seeing him with eyes close

breathing even

he was probably tired

he was the one who asked you to go out with him

but you were the one who got excited and drag him everywhere

minho was sleeping peacefully, the tv’s dim light was enough for you to see minho’s sharp features

unconsciously, but gently your fingers ran through his features

your fingers stayed longer on his lips

then your move your hand to his hair, brushing it back, revealing his forehead

he was fucking beautiful

you wanted to appreciate him, litter kisses all over his face as you cup his cheeks on your hands

but he wasn’t yours to appreciate

wait, fuck

oh, no

you are in love with your best friend

you woke up, eyes fluttering open

how,,,

did,,,

you,,,

end,,,

up,,,

in,,,

minho’s,,,

arms ???

minho’s arm underneath your neck, your head pressed on the crook of his neck

minho’s other arm around your frame, your arm was over his torso and your legs underneath the cover were tangled with each other

only two things could be heard in this very quiet morning

(1) minho’s quiet snores

(2) your pounding heart against your ribcage

it wasn’t that you and minho never cuddled

you did, a freaking lot

but there was something in this very cuddle session

it’s probably because of the feelings that you’ve discovered last night

fuck it

you closed your eyes, snuggles further into minho’s touch

you should just drink these moments up and savor it while it lasts

because you know you’ll never have minho likes this just because you want to

because just like that, minho belongs to someone

but that someone is not you

for what felt like minutes, when in reality an hour and half passed

minho finally woke up

you immediately untangled your body from minho’s pretending you were still asleep and you just moved to the other side

you kept your eyes close as you felt minho stretch his arms and limbs

“y/n?” minho groggily calls and you feel minho’s hand on your shoulder

minho looks at you and sighs

soon, you felt minho pulling away but his head lays on the curve of your body

minho stares at the ceiling, not knowing what to do

until he hears and feels your stomach grumble

minho giggles, turning to you again

“hey, wake up.” minho says as he lightly shakes you

actually, you were just partially pretending to sleep

because you’re actually getting sleepy again

you groaned

“come on, you’re hungry.” minho says, grabbing your wrist

minho’s hand come under your waist, lifting your upper body up so you would sit

then you opened your eyes

“eeeeeeh, minhoooooooooo,” you whined, a pout finding it’s way on your lips

minho chuckles

you don’t know if you were still sleepy and it was just your imagination

or it really did happen

but you think you saw minho almost lean in to kiss your lips

“wake up or i’m throwing you.” minho says and you stick your tongue out to him

“come on, let’s get breakfast. i’ll pay.” minho says and you whine louder

minho sighs, a soft smile displaying on his lips as he sat on your bed, pulling you into his lap as he tucks your head in his neck

you frown a bit as you felt your heart pound loudly again

minho’s hand come up on your arm, running up and down

fuck feelings

you pull away from minho smiling at him as you stood up

you fixed your hair and grabbed your phone

“you go have breakfast,” you said as you opened your phone to see the time. “i remember i promise a friend i’ll help with a project around 8 in the morning and it’s now 9.”

minho pouts, but nods as he stands up

“you’re not replacing me with that friend, are you?” minho says as he lightly pinches your cheek with his index and middle finger in a teasing manner but you could see the fear in his eyes

you shook your head. “never, minho.” you said with a soft smile

minho returns the smile, believing you

so you put your phone on your desk, going inside the bathroom to brush your teeth

luckily you have an extra so minho brushes his teeth as well

yes hygiene first

after, you grabbed your phone from your desk and wallet from your bag as minho grabs his things

you both went out of your dorm as you locked it

“bye, y/n,” minho says and he kisses your forehead

that’s the first time

it was probably because of the domestic-y theme you had since you both woke up

“bye, minho,” you said and starts walking to the opposite direction as you

you started to walk but you stopped, turning around

“min?” you called and minho turns around with a smile on his face, never leaving

his smile was contagious

you love it

“you know you’re my number one.” you said, smiling as you lightly tilt your to the side

minho chuckles, grinning at the ground

“and you know you’re mine.” minho says

you grin, extending your arm, pointing your index finger at him and winked at him

minho does the same and you turn around to go to your friend

which turned out to be jisung and hyunjin

yes, you lied to minho

because frankly, as much as you want, you don’t think you’re gonna last any longer with him acting like that

you arrived in front of jisung’s and hyunjin’s dorm, you knocked loudly

you waited and for another that passed no one answered

you knocked again, this time not stopping until it opens

when the door opens, it revealed a sleepy hyunjin

eyes half closed, hair ruffle with one ponytail to keep his bangs up

“what are you doing so early in the morning?” hyunjin mumbles

jisung groans as he presses his face into the pillow

“you two wanna get breakfast with me?” you said and hyunjin looks at jisung

jisung nods and stands up

“we’ll just go get change.” hyunjin says

“eh, don’t bother.” you said. “i’m in my pj’s, too.”

“yeah, everyone walks around in their pj’s. we’re in a compound of a university, no one will judge.” jisung agrees as he goes to the bathroom to probably brush his teeth

hyunjin whines and you roll your eyes

“you still look good even though you just got out of bed, jin.” you said

“r-really?” hyunjin asks and you look at him

he shoots a wink and you flick his forehead

classic drama queen, hwang hyunjin presses a palm on his forehead as he groans in pain

“yah—jisung, have you seen that?” hyunjin says as he momentarily looks at jisung’s way

you lightly giggle

a ghost of smile on hyunjin’s lips as he turns around from you to go brush his teeth

soon, the three of you strolled around the university’s compound

settling for a vintage dinner

as you can see i really love vintage lmao

just as you expected, the customers were students that are in their pj’s as well

you settled in one booth, hyunjin beside you and jisung across you

you all ordered and soon the food was on your table

“so, how’s the date with the boyfriend?” jisung asks in a teasing manner

“it was not a date and he is most certainly not my boyfriend.” you answered and pouted

“what’s with the pout?” hyunjin asks and your eyes remain on your lap

“you guys were right.” you mumbled

“with?”

“i’m in love with him.” you mumbled and you looked up at the two boys who just stared at each other

pretty soon jisung is sliding a cash towards hyunjin

“what’s that?” you asked

“i won,” hyunjin grins and jisung rolls his eyes

“with?” you asked

“we had a bet about you,” jisung says

“about?”

“how long will it take for you to admit it.” hyunjin answers

and you looked at them back and forth

“you made a bet about me?!” you exclaimed

and they both snort

“that’s okay,” hyunjin says

“you make bets about me, too.” jisung says

“and me.” hyunjin adds

you looked at them in disgust, jokingly

“so, tell us what happened.” jisung says

and so you did

everything that happened from last night up to earlier this morning

they both listened attentively

“he feels the same way.” hyunjin says after you told them the whole story

jisung nods, agreeing

“don’t be silly.” you said

“there are times when i see you with minho but you two seemed to be enjoying with just the two of you that’s why i never greet you when you’re with him.” jisung says

“shut up, we’re just really that close.” you said

“when you two are talking and then you both start to laugh, minho randomly grabbing your hand and lightly tugging at it excitedly?” hyunjin points out

“holding your hand when walking together?” jisung points out

“randomly hugging you out of nowhere as if he never saw you for thousands of years?”

“having his arm around you when crossing the road?”

“he never gets tired of you, too.”

“he’s also really clingy of you.”

“well, i’m clingy, too!” you defended

“but he can never stay away from you.” jisung says. “stop denying it, y/n.”

“but why is he dating other girls?” you asked

“that’s what you need to find out.” hyunjin says. “confront him before it’s late again.”

ever since hyunjin and jisung pointed things out

you realized, minho really is touchy towards you

but it wasn’t the kind where you get uncomfortable

it’s the kind where it makes you feel safe

but it always left you wanting for more

he wasn’t even like that with his girlfriends

just with you

for months, it went like that

minho didn’t introduce you to any girl for 3 months

you’re surprised yourself, but you know it’s not going to last long

and you know that when the time comes, it’s going to hurt this time

“hey, you okay?” the boy in your thoughts coming to life as he takes the seat across you

you only stared at him, cheek on palm, arm supporting your head, elbow on the table

so minho mimics you

you sigh and minho pouts

“hey,” minho says, reaching a hand out to your elbow. “you okay?”

you nod, dropping your hand to the table and minho is quick to catch it

he massages your hand and you smile at him

“what is it?” minho asks, his voice full of concern but still it makes you feel safe

“nothing, they just gave a lot of homework and it pissed me off.” you lied with a giggle

minho smiles, nodding

“i can help you if you want.” minho offers as he puts your hand softly on the table

“it’s okay,” you said. “the deadline is not even tomorrow.”

minho nods and you both let the comfortable silence take you in

you were lost in thought once more about the boy in front of you

you suddenly flinched when a cat jumped beside you

but you relaxed soon, patting the soft head of the feline

minho smiles at you as you got entertained with the feline

then you suddenly looked up, seeing hyunjin

you suddenly raised your other hand to wave at him with a grin on your face

hyunjin waves lightly, shooting you a wink as he gestured towards minho

you stuck your tongue out to him and he puckers his lips lightly as he giggles to himself

you smile as you watched hyunjin turn his back to you and walk to where he’s supposed to

“who was he?” minho asks, but you failed to notice the reluctance in his tone to ask

“hyunjin.” you answered as you kept on petting the feline

“hwang hyunjin?” minho asks and you nod. “you two seem close.”

“we are!” you said with a smile, but your focus is still on the cat

“how?”

“he’s my friend’s roommate.” you answered. “you know, my friend jisung?”

“oh.” minho says

you failed to notice how minho’s smile immediately wipe out of his face when you waved enthusiastically at hyunjin

when minho saw hyunjin wink at you

minho was just :|

was hyunjin flirting with you? minho could only sigh as he looks down, lost in his thoughts

you knew there was something wrong with minho

he wasn’t as teasing anymore

he isn’t as smiley as he was

he isn’t as jokeful as he was

it felt like he was a whole new person

even though he never stopped hanging out with you, it felt like he wasn’t really hanging out with you

for a week, it felt like you were hanging with someone else and not minho

you just didn’t want to pry him into telling you with what’s happening

so you let him be for now

but after two days, you just can’t function properly without minho

by lunch, you immediately went straight to the cafeteria

you see minho in your usual seat

you were walking up to him

but you halted when you see a girl slid in on the seat you would always sit on

minho’s eyes lit up, smile wide as he looks at the girl

just great

hurt

bad

did minho purposely avoid you and have dated another girl without telling you?

he would always tell you about it even if they’re just a minute into the relationship

why was minho even avoiding you?

“y/n!” someone called and you turned around

with the call of your name, minho’s attention was grabbed

his eyes immediately were on you and the guy who called you

you looked down, as you looked at the books that your arms were hugging

you looked up to see hyunjin who had a wide smile

but it was immediately wiped out

“why-why are you crying?” hyunjin stutters and you immediately have a hand reaching to the corner of your eye

you were crying

hyunjin’s gaze shifted on what you were possibly looking at

then, he locks eyes with minho

hyunjin sees the girl who confusedly looked at minho and then follows minho’s gaze

hyunjin immediately grabs your books and grabs your wrist, dragging you somewhere

you see hyunjin heading for the dorms

and soon enough, hyunjin was opening the door of their dorm

hyunjin put your books on his bed, taking his phone out immediately to text jisung

after 15 minutes max, jisung enters the dorm and was quick to see you on his computer chair

“what happened?” jisung asks

“i just saw y/n crying and then when i looked at where she was looking before i came, i saw minho with another girl.” hyunjin explains

“i’ve anticipated it and prepared myself for it, but it just hurts so bad.” you said as you looked away from your friends

hyunjin and jisung slowly comes to you

“i was so confused when he became distant the week before, i was gonna go to him when i saw her sit with him.” you continued and they looked at you with sympathy

you pouted, tears streaming down your face as you think of minho with that girl

“l-let’s go out,” jisung stutters, not sure if it’s a great idea. “we don’t have classes anymore, do we?”

you and hyunjin shook your heads

“let’s take minho off that pretty mind of yours.”

it…

was..

the..

worst..

everything

and i mean, everything reminded you of minho

everything that you two used to do

the arcade

you and minho would always play rock paper scissors on who would pay

the movie theater

you and minho would always go to it, but one of you would always end up sleeping

the samgyupsal places

you and minho have eaten in each and every samgyupsal place in town already

the ktv

every song that hyunjin and jisung selected were the songs minho would always yell sing his heart out to

hyunjin and jisung came into conclusion that going out was: useless

you, hyunjin and jisung were walking back to the dorms

when you passed by a convenient store

“hey,” you weakly said and they both looked at you

“you wanna grab some soju?” you asked them

it’s a saturday tomorrow anyway

,,,,,there’s no minho that would hang out with you

the thought of it makes you wanna curl up in a ball

right here, right now

hyunjin and jisung nods

and the three of you enter the convenient store to buy bottles of soju

luckily, you were bringing a large ass bag

so you were able to hide it as you entered the university

you said you would just go to your dorm to change into your pajamas

jisung offered to go with you

so you both went to your dorm

you changed into your pj’s and an oversized shirt

,,,,,which was minho’s

but jisung and hyunjin didn’t have to know that :)

you grabbed the cat plushie on your bed and jisung offers to bring the bag of soju

you both went to their dorm

then you waited for hyunjin and jisung as they changed into their own pj’s

they got some snacks

and then you three had finally had the first shot of the night, bumping your shot glasses with each other’s

you three talked about the most random things

a shot became two, then became three, then finally you don’t even remember anymore

you, hyunjin and jisung fell asleep on the floor

you woke up with your head pounding, a knocking on the door making it worse

you, hyunjin and jisung were on the floor, circling around the bottles of soju

one arm was hugging your cat plushie

other arm was extended with your hand holding your phone

then the knocking started again

you winced, the pounding of your head getting worse than ever

jisung and hyunjin groaning

hyunjin rolled underneath his bed while jisung grabbed the pillow under his head and covered his head with it, trying to block the noise

you stood up, eyes squinting as you dropped your phone and plushie on the ground

you walked up to the door

your hand reached to the door knob, unlocking it and opening the door

minho was standing on the other side and before you could even process it was him, you were turning around to walk to hyunjin’s bed, thinking it was just jisung’s and hyunjin’s friend

you turn your head back as you realized it was minho

then you turned to him full body

“minho,” you mumbled. “what are you doing here?”

“we need to talk.” minho says.

“about?” you mumbled as you leaned on the door, hands playing with the doorknob

if only you and minho weren’t on a serious situation right now, he most definitely thinks that you’re cute

“the message you sent me.” minho answers and your eyebrows scrunch in confusion

you looked at your friends and then back to minho

wait, oh no

“jisung, hyunjin,” you called and the two giggled in a drunk way. “i’m giving the two of you an advice and that is, never fall in love.”

“does it hurt?” hyunjin says as he rests his head on your lap

“it does!” you giggled and jisung pouts at you as he pats your head as if you’re a dog

“i’m thinking,” jisung says

“that’s not good,” hyunjin teases as he gets off of your lap and you giggle

“the three of us should get a shared house, then y/n wouldn’t have to go back and forth to her dorm and ours.” jisung says and you clap, nodding

“yes! yes! let’s just stay together.” you said

“but you would leave your best friend all alone!” hyunjin says with a pout on his lips. “minho, right? yeah! at least say goodbye to him.”

“are we moving tomorrow already?” you asked and hyunjin shrugs, giggling

“let’s!” jisung says. “go say goodbye to minho, y/n!”

“okay!” you said

“pour everything! tell him how you feel and all.” hyunjin giggles and you grab your phone, stumbling over a bit

you dialed minho’s never that even despite you were inebriated, you still memorize it

you lay on your back, hugging the cat plushie on your arm

other hand is pressing the phone against your ear

you scoffed, “voicemail.”

“minho! my best friend. i just called to say that i will be moving tomorrow with my friends, jisung and hyunjin! it would be rude if i don’t say goodbye to my best friend which is you!” you giggled

even a dumb person would know that you’re drunk

“but i would like to confess, too. i am so in love with you. it hurts so bad to see you with that girl earlier today. i would always tell you that my opinion doesn’t matter, go date who you want, but honestly, i never, ever liked any single girl you’ve went out with.

“one is too rude, the other too possessive, the other one was too kind, the other one did nothing but still, i don’t like her! i didn’t even know why. that was until jisung and hyunjin told me that i am in love with you.

“i denied it at first, but when we were watching three stooges and you fell asleep, my heart beat so loud, i thought you were going to wake up on how loud it was. i realized then that i was in love with you from the very start.

“you know, if only you asked me out a long time ago, you probably wouldn’t have gone through lots of heartbreaks as you did. i would’ve tried to be the perfect girlfriend for you. i would never do anything to hurt you, you know. your last girlfriend was too rude. it was honestly irritating to watch you go around and please her.

“don’t feel guilty, though. you’re still my best friend, but i have to keep my distance from you for now.” by now, tears were streaming down your face. a soft sob left your lips and you clamped your hand over your mouth as you sob

“i’m so in love with you.” you continued. “but i’ll try to be over it as soon as possible. i hope your new girl treat you well. remember, you’re my number one, always.

“good night, minho.” you said and ended your voicemail.

you cuddled with your plushie and hid your face on it as tears streamed down

you feel jisung patting your head and hyunjin on your legs

you clamped your hand over your mouth, pushing the door, slamming it on minho’s face as you remembered everything last night

you sigh, putting your hands over your face

fuck, fuck, fuck, you fucked up big time

jisung and hyunjin groaned loudly but you didn’t care right now

“y/n, please, we have to talk.” minho says and you turn your back on the door, leaning against it

your hands on your face, frustrated as you don’t know what to do

“how’d you know i was here?” you asked

“i went to your dorm, but when you weren’t answering, i used the spare key you gave me and you weren’t there and i came here only to ask them where you are, but here you are.” minho answered

you feel like crying again

how could you be so stupid?

“minho, please, go away.” you said

“no, let’s talk about this. we have to talk about this.” minho says

“i don’t want to.” you said

“i’m not going away, y/n.” minho says

you pull your hands away to see jisung looking at you

“who is it?” jisung asks as he stands up

“minho,” you said and jisung walks up to you, grabbing your shoulders and rubbing them comfortingly

“y/n, please, let’s talk.” minho says and frankly, you could hear the desperation in his tone

“not now, please.” you said and minho sighs

“please?” minho mumbles

you shook your head, looking up at jisung

jisung’s eyes screams that you need to talk to him

“y/n, you have to.” jisung says

“but i don’t want to.”

“running away is not going to fix this.” jisung says as he grabs your shoulder, pulling you forward as he opens the door

he shoots minho a smile, which minho gratefully returns

“jisung, please,” you said

“y/n, talk to him.” jisung says and you shake your head. “he’s your best friend, what could go wrong?”

everything. minho could dump you and throw your whole friendship away

as if reading your mind, jisung says, “you’re important to him, he won’t throw your friendship out of the window just like that. okay? do what you should’ve done a long time ago. talk to him.” jisung says

your shoulders slump, giving up as jisung lets go of your shoulders

jisung pushes you gently of the door and smiles at you

he closes the door and you look at the ground

then, you felt minho turning you around to face him

he wraps you in his arms, placing your head on his neck

“i could never do that, you know.” minho mumbles and you just let him be

you didn’t move, you didn’t speak

you wanted him to go first

“you’re an idiot, y’know?” minho mumbles and you sigh, nodding. “she’s not my girlfriend, dummy.” minho says. “i don’t even know who she is, she was just asking if she could share the table and i agreed, i don’t want to be rude.”

“then why were you so distant these days?” you mumbled

minho pulls away and looks at you

“wanna know the real reason of my breakups?” minho asks and you sighed, nodding. “they kept on making me choose between them and you, naturally, i would’ve picked you.”

you looked down. “you know, if you really genuinely liked them, you could’ve just picked them and talk to me, i would’ve understood, y’know.” you mumbled

“listen,” minho says with a light laugh, cupping your cheeks as he made you look up at him. “the recent one hit me the most, though.”

“why?”

“she told me to stop dating everyone if my heart belongs to you.” minho says and you looked at him in pure confusion. “it won’t click if i keep on forcing myself to like someone else knowing it was you all along.

“for years, i kept on dropping hints that i’ve liked you for so long until it became deeper. but you didn’t seem to notice, so i started to date other girls because you only see me as a best friend and nothing more.

“but i was stupid, too. i thought you and hyunjin were flirting with each other and i got jealous that’s why i got distant.”

stupid minho, stupid you

equally stupid

“i’m sorry for hurting you all this time, y/n.” minho says and you look into his eyes as he looks into yours. “give me a chance and i promise i will never ever hurt you.”

“i’m sorry, too,” you said. “for being stupid.”

“that’s okay, i was, too.” minho says as he lightly laughs

you wrap your arms around his waist and minho kisses your forehead.

“so, what do you say?” minho asks. “will you be my girlfriend or should we go through another phase of denying our feelings?”

you giggle, looking down as a blush crept through your cheeks

“i think the best option is the first one.” you said as you look up at him and smile

minho looks at you as he places his hand on the your lower back

“can’t resist your number one, can’t you?” minho says teasingly as he looks at you with a smile

he shoots you a wink and you chuckle

“you really don’t know how wink, do you?” you teased and minho rolls his eyes

“can we please focus on more important things like me flirting with you?” minho asks and you laughed

“get to the part where you ask me if you can kiss me!” you said with a giggle and minho tries his best not to laugh, but he still grins at you widely

“well, can i kiss you?” minho asks and you nod

“by all means, go.” you said and minho leans in

you stare into his eyes as he gets closer

when he was an inch close, he pulls away

“are you sure?” minho asks, teasing you

“yes, now hurry up!” you said with a frown

minho leans in again, when your breath mingles

“are you really sure about this?” minho whispers

“more than anything,” you whispered back as you place a peck on his lips

minho smiles, looking at your lips as he dives in for a breathtaking kiss that you’ve been waiting to have

you pulled away lightly, your lips still brushing against his

but minho whines

you chuckle and minho takes the reins, not being able to take your teasing

minho kisses you on the lips, smiling against your lips as you do to

and soon, you two are grinning, making it hard to kiss

you look into minho’s eyes, smiling

“you really do hold the universe in your eyes.” you say as you have hand running up and down soothingly on minho’s back

“that’s your reflection, babe.”

omg, i hope that wasn’t so bad i was so scared to post this. thank you for reading, i hope you like it :(( uwu <3

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thetriggeredhappy · 4 years ago

Note

Could i request an ace sniper fic? I really like that headcannon, and i dont think i've seen much fic about it

absolutely and hell yeah, anon. aspec sniper is best sniper. went with ace/aro specifically for this one but every iteration of aspec is fair and valid. also the demo-sniper-scout friendship because i love the idea of them hanging out

(no warnings)

Lunch break, Hightower. Scout and Demo were the only two who ever consistently visited Sniper in Hightower on account of being the only ones who would ever bother going all the way to wherever he’d posted up for the day, and they were aware of that fact, and so had started a habit of eating lunch up there with him whenever they could. It was a good system. Especially because going to that trouble had the added bonus of privacy, being able to talk about things they didn’t feel like talking about in front of the other mercs. Not that Sniper was particularly talkative—he preferred to listen.

Things they were embarrassed about were a topic, sometimes.

“—and so I’m beatin’ myself up over it, right? Like, yeah I’m barely scrapin’ by on my second senior year and workin’ one job for real and another one under the table and I’ve got sports the rest of the time so of course I can’t pay much attention to her, so figured she’d get annoyed, but I still felt bad right? But then, turns out, buddy from my track team sees her like four days after we break up holdin’ hands with some other guy!” Scout rambled from his place vaguely lounged back against Demo’s arm as both Sniper and Demo ate their respective lunches from their respectively marked tupperwares. None of them remembered who started it, but they tended to sit almost shoulder-to-shoulder, and it had escalated into leaning against each other and a wall and looking out over the field as they talked. “So, like, man, wantin’ to focus on her college stuff and too busy for dating, yeah right.”

“What you get, dating a lass who’s younger than you, lad,” Demo hummed around his mouthful.

“Yeah, yeah. Only a year difference, but man, felt it all at once, huh? Anyways. She got told off by a buddy of mine about it, and we had an argument at some point, but... yeah. That’s the messiest breakup I ever had, probably, just because everyone knew everyone,” Scout trailed off. Silence for a second. “What about you guys?”

“Told you mine,” Demo said, had to pause to finish his mouthful to get the rest out. “Chemistry class, dated three times, she cheated twice.”

“Oh yeah. Jesus, yeah, fuck,” Scout sighed, remembering. “Why’d you put up with that a second time?”

“She was cute,” Demo shrugged, almost dislodging Scout and jostling Sniper a little on accident. “Ah, sorry Mickey.”

“Y’alright,” Sniper assured under his breath.

“Any messy breakup stories for us?” Demo prompted.

Scout tilted his head a little back towards Sniper. “Hey, yeah. I feel like I ramble about relationship stuff like, constantly—“

“You ramble about everything constantly,” Demo teased.

“Eh, fuck you,” Scout said offhandedly, rolling his eyes. “But I talk about that stuff constantly, and Demo brings up stuff sometimes, but you’ve, like, never told us any stories.”

“Not much to tell,” Sniper shrugged simply. “Not my thing. End of story, really.”

“Not your thing?” Scout repeated, audibly confused, sitting up a little bit to look back at Sniper. “What’s that mean?”

“Never much liked dating, relationships, any of that,” Sniper replied without needing to think too deeply about it. “Didn’t care much, that’s all.”

“Thought that was me as well for a while,” Demo said carefully. “Realized I just didn’t have time for it, mostly, between the job and friends and that, so I’d rather wait until I do. Same with you?”

“Nah. Had the time, had the energy, just didn’t like it. Not my speed. Made me uncomfortable, mostly,” Sniper murmured, itching idly under his hat. “Went out with a few sheilas from around, they’d either properly like me or not, and... I just never liked them much. Mostly went because I didn’t know what else to do. Thought I was turning down too many chances, something like that. But then I figured out, nah. Just skip the whole thing.”

“Wait, for like, dating? Or for one-night stands?” Scout asked, eyebrows furrowed.

“Both. Or, er, neither. Wanted nothing to do with either.” Sniper pulled his hat back on straight. “Figured for a minute in my, er... must’ve been mid-twenties? Figured maybe my problem was just that I was into blokes instead, but nah. Just as bad. Just as... nothing, really. So I stopped bothering with forcing it.”

“Good on you,” Demo said appraisingly, jostling him cheerfully, and the corner of Sniper’s mouth quirked up a little.

“Nothing, huh?” Scout repeated, musing aloud. “What, so... like, how people will go on a first date and just never try and call each other again? Just, no sparks? But for everyone?”

“Presumably. Don’t have a frame of reference for what those sparks are like,” he said, then sat up a little a moment later. “No, wait, I know I’ve felt, er... felt something similar. Not sparks, the, er, the nervousness. Then I realized that wasn’t a romance sort of thing, it was me being, er... jealous, and intimidated, and just thinking they were good-looking objectively. Happened with a few blokes, s’why I thought I’d try men for a while. Didn’t last, not past properly meeting them. That’s all, really.”

A nod of understanding from Demo, a general sort of ‘huh’ noise from Scout. A pause. “Would you ever do the, er... marriage of convenience, then? No risk of it getting messy,” Demo joked.

“Nah,” Sniper said, laughing a little. “Nah. Thought about maybe trying it for citizenship at some point, but only on paper. I don’t tend to stay places too long. S’why I like this job.”

“Man, I’m kinda jealous,” Scout huffed. “It’d kick ass to not have to deal with crushes and shit.”

“Eh. Sometimes I’m curious, what it must feel like,” Sniper admitted. “Wouldn’t change it, it’s just... interesting to imagine. I like romance novels.”

“Really?” both Demo and Scout asked, sitting up and looking at him, and he huffed a laugh.

“Can’t be that hard to believe. Liked Jane Austen later on in school, kept reading more. They’re... I liked fantasy when I was young, it feels like that. Adjacent. And I know what love is, I’ve got parents I love, had pets, had relatives who were essentially siblings, it’s just something different from the sort I know about. S’pose it’s, er... just strange sometimes, nice to laugh at the characters for being so ridiculous about things.”

“Don’t tell me you pick up novels from the dimestore, Mickey,” Demo said disapprovingly. “Or those dry historical ones. Tell me it’s all good, not just the same few stories recycled.”

“Only if I’m particularly bored,” Sniper admitted, and Demo made a sound of vague disgust. “And I don’t read much, besides. Have other hobbies.”

“Is it the same thing with why you don’t talk to the rest of us guys much?” Scout cut in, speaking for the first time in a bit. “Just don’t feel it? Not a thing on your radar?”

“Nah. That’s because I’m just not the talkative type. I like you lot plenty, it’s why I go sulk in the base with you all quietly, if I didn’t like you then you’d never see me,” Sniper replied. “If anything, I think it means I appreciate you all more. Less worrying about balancing things, all that.”

“That’s fair,” Scout said, settling back down, nodding vaguely. “Yeah, that’s fair.”

A pause between the three of them. “So I don’t have any particularly interesting breakup stories,” he added. “But I’ve got farm stories, if you’d like.”

“Obviously!” Demo laughed at the same time that Scout chimed an emphatic “Fuck yeah!”, and Sniper rolled into a story about how particularly dumb sheep are as farm animals, and that was the end of that discussion.

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #shut up me #my fanfiction #everybody talks

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sunarintoes · 5 years ago

Text

Boyfriend Headcanons

Includes: Sakusa, Komori, Shirabu, Atsumu

Warnings: none - just pure fluff :) oh wait some swearing!!

✗ you have to be clean!! There’s no two ways about this. Of course you dont have to be super clean freak germaphobe!! (Extra points if you are because cleaning is his passion and he hates germs and he would love to share that with you)

✗ it takes a while for him to become affectionate, he has to ‘get used to your germs’ and all. When you are at home he will love to cuddle with you!! He particularly loves it when you are clean sitting in his lap while watching a movie! Because!! Then he can wrap his arms around you and rest his head on yours!

✗ one of his favourite dates is going shopping together... to the chemist. He likes having you with him as he looks through all the hygiene and sanitary items, often asks you ‘does this smell good’ because baby wants to be clean AND smell good. He will smell like a fresh bouquet if you so wish. Afterwards he’ll take you out to eat and pay for your food as a thank you.

✗ he’s in no way, shape or form fond of PDA. It makes him uncomfortable and he prefers to keep his private life, private. And you completely respect that!! The most he will go is the occasional hand holding or giving you his vbc jacket.

✗ he will make it clear he’s in a relationship though! He doesnt want his fan girls to continue coming on to him so he will tell them bluntly, it probably went something like this: ‘I am in a relationship with Yn. If you have a problem I dont care. Please stop trying to get in with me from here on out and dont touch Yn otherwise I’ll drown you in bleach.’ Wow isnt he just a charmer.

✗ he doesnt mind if you wear a face mask or not, but be prepared: he will refuse to kiss you until you’ve thoroughly washed your face. He does think your face is cute/pretty/handsome/etc so I think he’d prefer to see it.

✗ i don’t think hes one to be jealous or possessive but doesn’t like it if other people ‘contaminate you with germs’ so he’ll most likely stick around you to defend you from ‘germs’ so i guess he’s pretty protective. But not toxic protective!! He likes it when you come to his games and cheer for him!

✗ Komori is the softest ever! He loves you and he loves affection!!!! Bb is kinda clingy but its okay because he’s adorable and you love his hugs! He loves snuggling with you - face to face, while the both of you talk about anything and everything!

✗ he definitely loves it when you come to his games and he always gives you his jacket to wear! After every game when he sees you waiting for him in the foyer he runs up and hugs you.

✗ he lives to see you smile! Komori really loves when you smile! Please smile for him! But don’t fake it! Fake smiles make him sad! If he ever sees you fake a smile (and he can always tell bcz of how much he loves your smile) he will always make time to speak with you or FaceTime you to ask you how you’re going and if you’re okay. He doesn’t like his bb being sad :’)

✗ Komori really likes cute cliche dates! Sometimes you tease him about it but you can’t deny that he always makes them special - even if they’ve been done a million times before. Picnic dates and star gazing dates are a must!

✗ when it comes to PDA, he’s not necessarily against or for it, hes just kinda like eh whatever works in the moment. However!! Holding hands everywhere is a must.

✗ I don’t see him as the type to get jealous and/or possessive. He gives vibes that are full of positivity, so I feel like in a relationship with him he’s very trusting and understanding. However, if someone is flirting with you and making you uncomfortable he will intervene. Unless!! You have it under control, if so then he’ll just come up and stand next to you with a passive aggressive smile directed at the dude. If you don’t have it under control, he will come up and put a hand on your shoulder to reassure you and then he will talk to the guy. He starts off by asking a random question like ‘how’s the weather’ or whatever, and this usually confuses the guy because ‘???? Who’s this dude and why’s he talking to me so friendly’ anywho, he chats the dude’s ears off and the dude ends up leaving.

✗ he cant cook but can make he finest 2min noodles. Eat his noodles. He’ll be happy.

✗ aight here we are, piss hair - my second favourite Miya <3 jk

✗ being real, if youre gonna date atsumu you have to have to be able to take a joke. Please dont be offended. It’s just that he likes to joke around with you and 10/10 will point to something ugly and say ‘that’s you babe.’ He doesn’t do it to be mean!!! No!! He just sucks shit at expressing himself and therefore he teases you to show his affection verbally. He often says ‘I love ya’ to remind you because he knows words can hurt. He does his best to not be too mean :,) and if you ever look slightly sad because of something he said he will flick the switch and turn into a really loving bf. Hah simp.

✗ he wont admit it but he loves affection. Pda is a yes for him. Loves it when you sit in his lap or hold is hand or jump onto his back. He thinks you’re the cutest. You wear his jacket. Before and after games he gives you a sweet kiss on the lips, nothing steamy though thats for back home. He hugs you as a stress release. I know that sounds weird but he finds you to be so comforting and when he engulfs you in a hug and he can smell your shampoo/perfume he just feels really safe and loved and all round lucky to have you.

✗ Oh I know a lot of people have this hc about him only allowing you to cheer for him during his serves but I dont vibe with that. He likes it silent to concentrate so even if you were special (which you are) he doesnt want that game concentration interrupted, which you of course respect and understand. However as soon as his serves are up and its actual game time please cheer as loud as you want because he loves it when you cheer him and his boys team on!!

✗ mans is jealous, he doesnt like it when others get too comfy comfy with you. Like he knows you have other friends and he gets that but he does not! And I repeat - does not! Like it if they (esp opposite gender) get super touchy with you because in his head: ‘why get touchy with her/him/them when I’m literally right here???’ Oh yeah and he hates it when some weirdo is tryna chat you up, so to combat that he would definitely make his presence known. In scenario 1: ‘hey buddy can I have my girl/boy/sIo for a sec? Yeah thanks mate.’ Then he proceeds to kiss you harshly on the lips. Scenario 2: he walks up to the guy/girl/person and puts a hand on the both of yours shoulder. ‘She’s/he’s/they’re taken buddy, scram it.’ And the weirdo gets intimidated by that passive aggressive smile and the strong hand on his shoulder so they usually run away with a scowl right after they’re told.

✗ hes only soft for you behind closed doors sorry bb. Mans is a big simp. Even if he wont show it. I headcanon that he has a horse and knows how to ride it so sometimes he rides it to your house and calls you to come outside. You go outside and there he is, sitting on this large beast with a picnic basket, ‘hey babes wanna have a picnic?’ Ngl you’re surprised every time but go anyways. Omg imagine one day when youre at the picnic he’s all like ‘hey babes wanna see a trick?’ And youre like, ‘yeah sure’ so he gets on the horse and does idk something but then gets bucked off. Omg that shit would be hysterical. Brb gonna write a short scenario on this.

✗ wow ok I love him so much

✗ ok ok so we know Shirabu is smart (example in the timeskip) so he often stays up really really late to work on assignments and to study which means he can get very tired and burnt out esp when he has to do volleyball on top of all that. This is where you come in, you often visit his dorms (Shiratorizawa has dorms so thats the base for shirabu) and when you visit his dorms you bring lots of food - healthy foods to get his brain working but also snack foods to help him relax and release some of that good ol’ serotonin.

✗ when he studies but also feels like cuddling you find yourself facing him while sitting in his lap. You gotta move though cause he’s still working so you end up just cuddling into him like a koala. When he doesnt have to write/is busy reading he will wrap his arms around you and place a kiss to your forehead. He loves you omg, thinks you’re the cutest thing ever. IN FACT his home screen is a picture of you asleep, cuddling him in his lap. The only reason you’re not his lock screen is bc he has a rep to keep up in the club and cant have brats like goshiki knowing he can be soft or tendou teasing him for being ‘simp.’

✗ like atsumu, you gotta be able to take a joke because mans is a salt stick and loves teasing/roasting you. Ofc you do it back. Sometimes you team up and tease Kawanishi together. Please save Kawanishi, he does not want to deal with either of you, bb is tired from volleyball.

✗ shirabu knows he may not be the ideal boyfriend - he’s hopelessly devoted to the volleyball club and studies the life out of himself, so he often finds himself apologising to you and feeling incredibly guilty that he may have to cancel your date every so often. You make sure to remind him that its okay, that you knew what you were getting into when you started dating him and that you admire that he’s so determined and such a hardworker and that you love him. Every time you tell him he almost cries, he loves you.

✗ to make up for lost dates he will invite you to his dorm, or he’ll go to yours and the both of you will spend the day cuddling and snacking on food while watching movies. For him this is like killing two birds with one stone because 1) he gets to relax and have some downtime and 2) he gets to spend that time with you and just being in your presence relaxes him so much. Hhhhh hes so precious omg i love him. Oh and he’ll make sure to tell you that he loves you - it took a while for him to say it because he wanted it to mean something.

✗ when it comes to pda he’s not the most comfortable about it, yknow he just prefers to keep that to himself. But!! Will 100% hold your hand if you ask. Sometimes you don’t even have to ask! He just really likes holding your hand.

✗ now is he jealous or possessive? Yes he is jealous, i cant describe why. He just gives those vibes. I think it’s because he has a lot of self doubt and insecurities about being a good boyfriend that he feels like someone could just sweep you away. He’s self aware so he knows it’s his insecurities talking so he does his best to not believe and act on them but sometimes when someone is deliberately flirting and knows you have a bf he will be big mad. Full on walks up to the guy with an intimidating aura and roasts him. Ngl you find it funny because he’s spitting out insults faster than you could say supercalifragi- something i forgot how to spell it lol.

#haikyuu #haikyu #haikyuu x reader #fluff #x reader #headcanons #hc #shirabu fluff #atsumu fluff #sakusa fluff #komori #shirabu kenjiro #sakusa kiyoomi #komori motoya #miya atsumu

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misterbitches · 4 years ago

Text

some thots. having a bad time so this is rougher than usual. oh well

....

i guess he really does know hiim best cos if that was my mans (man specifically cos if anyone else did that id take it more srsly) i would be like oh my god ur singing me a love song? i would love it but i woudl SCREAM in embarrassment. UNLESS it was a really deep love song that's about us dying together.

like i want to eat ur skin type of thing (drain u nirvana) lmaoa but i really like this song it reminds me of that velvet underground song (the only one i know cos of juno lmao) and nico or whatever 'i'm sticking with you)

my adhd would be out of fucking control i had to spend my time listening to this looking around i kept getting distracted by a tissue and thinking "wow this song is nice but i wish it would end bc i am getting distracted" and lo and behold i paused it and i have to pee and i know it's gonna take forever to undo this

ok about 12m later i turned it back on and they kissed and then he bit the corn then that night li chen also lost his virgin teas after watching gay porn and being like "hm interesting" and he'll be like "i see, ur dick is not medium sized"

i'm honestly gagging i cannot at this 12 year old marrying his mom

beautiful theyre beautiful

ayea you fucking psycho we do too because he was 17 and we had to witness it (or well, other people did cos i didnt watch the show even tho wayne song is [BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEP] and i want him to [BEEEEEEEP] and ppl even liked it which is fine like i get it in theory but they put this in my eyeballs so i'm gonna make fun of it bc it's fuckin DUMB lmao like i can't I CANNOT and he said "u were so persistent" BITCH UR 30??!?!???!?!?!?)capi hve it on mute and i tried to get a screencap of li chen and mu ren like together and not just his face but i cant find the timestamp and seeing their faces as they get married is literalyl traumattizing i'm like scremaing at my screen going "HE'S 5 HE'S 5 HE'S 5" and every time theyre like "we acn live forever together" like no bitch ur bones rae creaking

also is the officiator white? if anyone knows why or if that's common i'd love to know more. EDIT: HE ISN'T I JUST THOUGHT HE LOOKED LIKE MOBY FROM THAT ANGLE

anyway here

i'm almost done with this fucking bullshit and i am in a really ould mood and usu they make it a bit better but imo it's kind of....annoying i guess balancing all these story elements and introducin gother couples (even in the periphery) since the story in itself can't focus. i feel like all in all the time spent with these two is a lot more limited and we get the feel for the rship because of their chemistry as actors, irl chemistry as friends and colleagues, and hopefully being happy and working on a good set. so it isn't the strength of the writing or production.

for some reason they get like less dynamic ways of being together which i think is part of their charm, they do things their own way, but the writers really should have substantiated this more. it's really just the way everyone in the show has managed to deliver these AWFUL story lines and production decisions (like seriously who the fuck was on costume? lighting?)

like maybe hot take but all the moments that are cringe and insane in the show are not pleasant, per se, because they aren't thought out clearly. so they're not a joy to watch in the normal sense but the actors are good enough to pull it off. i didn't cringe at the talks they had because it felt like actors like acting these lines out instead of us being embarrassed for it and you CAN TELL theyre embarrassed.

this is a huge kudos to the casting director and the actors and whatever crew that actually did a good job. i don't particularly like watching bo xiang and his grandfather husband not because of the content but because i feel like, to me, they're so awkward even though they have chemistry. i don't have that issue with xing si and his rapist brother boyfriend because watching them is actually really pleasant, it's intimate. this isn't to do with the story though because when it hits you how devoid this other person is and how stupid the situation is it changes (for me, for me, for me, this is all my opinion think whateverrrr u want im not telling u 2 ok!)

so truly kudos to this cast. idk if i'm misremembering here but imo the most cast appropriate series in this was crossing the line and close to you. one is a decent atmosphere and execution (yes even with that brother story line, notice the major key differences though because that's a sincere false equivalence. they try to execute power imbalances soooo badly and then fail every time but here's one meant to shock too and it was just likelmao ok girl?)

it may not make sense to say either in a writing way or for the character to do it but i believe that whoever the characters these people are supposed to be especially those super not well written on the page still get that message aacross (yong jie's actor is a good ex. not sure if i should ccongratulate him for having the worst job on earth and the worst character and his character is flat but. ostensibly they should let their actions speak for themselevs but what they do is they back themselves into a ccorner with unsuretyabout their characters or a dilemma that pops up they just want to excuse it. well guess hwat u couldnt do enough legwork. but to some extent the disposable side couple works here on a um "our eyes see them and get it" way

also to me it seems like they chose this story just to have this specific wedding. like it's a timely topic and i'm pretty sure like another provision? (correction? idk) was made WRT taiwanese same-sex marriage so it's topical but it isn't like a "papa and daddy" situation where they're interacting in it and there (for ex: the pride parade) and there being like real life terms and consequences. here it seems like they were like ah yes wedding ah yes dumb couple from modc bc we kiled off the other one sooooo (then outsource them to life love on the line u__u) then hamfisting in some fucking message which is funny bc

- despite the hints peppered in and the clear attraction they both acknowledge ur like ~not gay just him~ even tho...i mean i just. again they dont read over what they write i don't think considering. but wahtever.

- the only gay dude (verbally said) is with his rapist brother with an awful power dynamic oh or IS a rapist (gao) (or his brother but i think it was just a "im a psycho so it's him" thing unless they said it. in which case idc cos i wasnt paying attn but that's also not great) or i guess the wedding but like....that's also a ridiculously inappropriate and dumb relationship taht it's built on. i mean i don't really see much respect her so i dont particularly want to hear abt gay weddings being important when they didn't even utilize it in the story beforehand and have we ever. this is a huge indication to me that it was a reverse engineered chosen story beforehand (if it was one) or thought of

soooooo

so reversal of that....it didnt give us enough time to breathe with these two at all but for both of the actors they can capitalize what's on the page and the writers didn't. like their dynamic is very i give/you give like taking car eof each other etc that's why

again, no artist worth their salt will ever say their work meant nothing. that's a cover up. i'm sick of lazy production and then getting away with it claiming being subversive or attacking an issue by not doing anything. we show crazy shit all the time but it has a POINT and ur point is "i like the gays" then girl.....i mean it's not great

but the acting really carried it. i have a feeling if this series continues it might continue to use more experienced actors cos maybe the budget goes up but they also have less inhibitions now when it comes to acting. i like the way li chen expresss himself and teng teng too. i like anson a lot and there's some angles that did not do any favors and i think eh has to get more control of his body movements (bc he's SO LARGE and thin) but he wasn't bad at all and there were real human tears. of course i, personally, favor charles tu. he has more control over his body because he has...less to work with and he's a bit bigger and he was really great in this role. he's a himbo a bit of a meathead but you like him. you like them. there's some things i think they had them say and do that they wouldn't let happen if they stuck to the characters and the story (mainly liking that dumb idiot rapist)

what i notice is that the reprehensible actions people criticize others for in the show and in real human life lalways gets turned around. teng teng being surprised that this boy's grandfather boyfriend met him when he was a junior in high school and he's 12 years older and him apologizing for being shocked and then whatshisface going "ur better at it than most people" and then the convo about gao with whatshisface and then rapist brother comes to pick him up. they are admonishing gao but thinking that rapist brother is noble for doin gwhat he did (and oh rapist brother shows up) like the hypocrisy and the decisions are immense. so now it's like "guys see he's a great guy" like girl STICK TO SOMETHING but whatever so i live in this universe where muren and li chen do everything right and have lots of different interesting fun seex with all their friends. i would write this but i cannot i am dying

#history 4: close to you #history 4 #li chen x mu ren #a thot

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askmyboys · 5 years ago

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Louie

Real Name: Its something that cant be said around humans otherwise it hurts their ears (it basically sounds like static mixed with a high pitched noise, it can be damaging to the ears if not careful) | Human Name: Louie | Nickname: He really only has one nickname n that's Lou, sometimes he won't mind being called Louis either though | Gender: Male | Age: N/A- there's really no traces of how old he REALLY is, he's not even sure he remembers himself- | Sexuality: Pansexual | Species/Race: Demon | Height: 6'9" (he's a sizeshifter tho) | Hair Color: Umber Brown (his hair is SUPER messy and dirty looking, sometimes he'll wear a hat like a fedora or something to keep it covered, not like he gives a shit if someone comments on it tho) | Eye Color: Desire Red | Appearance: He'll sometimes wear suits out in public, albeit ALL his clothing is dirty, dingy, and dusty- he just doesn't give a shit about hygiene in general, but he's not too picky with clothes, it just depends on his mood, usually its suits, sometimes its more of a punk-like look, sometimes its just tank tops and boxers, he doesnt. give. a. s h i t- dont test this demon buddy, he'll take ALL his clothes off, he'll go out naked, fuckin public indecency his ass- your lil human laws don't apply to him- He's vERY chumby, got that chub going- big soft boy- His entire fingers ARE the claws, long sharp claws- he also of course has sharp bear trap teeth, his canines both top and bottom are a bit longer than the rest of his teeth of course, his ears are also pointed and he's got a few piercings in there as well and you know he's got the short boxed beard. | Personality: He's just a really carefree, lazy, laid back kinda demon dude- I won't say there isn't ANYTHING that won't piss him off or make him sad, bc you know there's ALWAYS something out there BUT- he just doesn't care, he takes compliments in the form of insults, if ya actually compliment him- well he dont expect that but eh your free to do so, either way it dont make him much different, I wont deny- he's got that SUPER big fuck energy, he be fuckin- he does make a LOTTA sexual innuendos, like a l o t of them- he's got that big chaotic evil fuck energy, dont give a shit what gender or whoever you are- you can want to be perceived as a threat- if he likes you he gon f l i r t- in fact someone wanting to be a threat- now thats hot, he's like a cat mixed in with a dog almost, can be very lazy one moment and he's up and going the next, will eat ALL your food and drink all your drinks even tho he legit doesn't need too and then HE'LL call YOU a bitch for not having anymore food or drinks. Big Bastard, I don't know if I'd say he's REALLY evil n shit, he does love to cause trouble, scare some people- but for murdering people n torture and doing all that? Bah, that's a bit TOO much work for him, now if he HAD too? Oh absolutely, he could and WOULD murder if it was necessary- but nah the most yer gon get outta him is scares, him causing trouble around your house or depleting your food and drink supplies too quickly (tl;dr: Carefree, lazy, laid back- he's ALMOST impossible to piss off or make sad, too many gross sexual innuendos, big bastard, chaotic evil fuck energy, can and WILL flirt with you, like a dog/cat mix one minute lazing around the next minute he's ready to go n bother people, hide your food and drinks if you wanna survive otherwise your gon be fucked ....n-not literally- I mean unless you'd want too, he's gross and smelly and will NOT take a bath, he wants to s m e l l like death and any other horrible things so fuck u) | Side Facts: This character is the death of me, he's broken the fourth wall which I wouldn't deny he could probably do and strangled me to death with his bare claw hands- I just genuinely wanted a gross, bit too sexual demon character for some reason but listen, he might be a monster but he's not a MONSTER and by that I mean if you dont wanna do the "fun stuff" in that regard he'll respect that, consent matters- he might be a creep and every horrible word in the world combined but he's not like THAT, he DOES have standards like THAT anyways. If ya don't wanna do that fun stuff at LEAST go out n scare some people shitless with him, or help him bother some humans- or if he's feeling particularly lazy, he'll crash at your place n just, well, bother YOU instead- and he'll probs try to scare ya once or twice too but eh that's to be expected- I will say- he's DEFINITELY a deal maker-like demon, he DOES make deals n stuff from time to time- he DOES enjoy doing it every so often, bc most of the time he gains ownership of someone's soul every now and then but other than that, its still a lotta work- like he doesn't wanna do it all the time, besides who's gonna care that he ain't making deals like he's supposed to. He actually doesn't stay in hell too often, its MOSTLY bc of preference for the living world, humans are there and their MUCH more easy and fun to mess with than other demons (other demons h a t e him, their disgusted by him which to him? ....G o o d, die mad about it then babe~) Satan and him tho- now Satan albeit he does NOT like the smell at all he hides that bc of Lou's personality, he can v i b e with him on the carefree n laid back part for sure ....justpleaseLouisastheliteralrulerofhellIamgoingtobegyoutopleasetakeabathorsomething...) He likes Satan much more than he thought he would, for the literal ruler of hell that dude's pretty chill- ....ok come on let's be honest here, you know as well as I have Louie has absolutely flirted with Satan once or twice, hell- he's flirted with MANY demons before- needless to say not uh many of em liked it which hey I mean its not the response he really wanted nor expected but pissing off a demon can be fun plus they can be REALLY violent ...he may or may not be a masochist and a bit of a sadist even? oh and uh before my dumbass forgets, he's got some powers aside from sizeshifting, he can shapeshift into a few things, mimic other's voices, or even like disappear really quickly- that's only if he needs to get out of situations or make it seem like a person's c r a z y maybe- just maybe but shh, etc- a few other things- you know how demons are- that's good enough for now I guess? I HAD more stuff to say bout him but I genuinely forgot- whoops- but if I think of it dont worry- ye'll know

#my oc #new oc #demon oc #Louie #he's such a disgusting filthy bastard #but im proud and ashamed of myself for his creation too #oh and lemme say right now #his height and eye color is absolutely intentional

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werewolfwilds · 7 years ago

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i redid an ask meme that i had originally done ~3 years ago to see the comparison so for archiving purposes im putting it in a lil journal entry here ! i wanna start doing small journal entries again it was fun when i did that

new answers bolded

1) what images do you have set for your desktop/cell phone wallpapers?

my desktop bg is literally just…. a collage of kageyama manga screencaps a h a,,,, and my cellphone bg are drawings some gay drew me like 74724 years ago :v // my desktop rn is actually a background from one of the dmmd routes LMFAO..... idk which one it is but i’ve always liked those bg pics!! my cell lock screen is p5 art and my bg is leopika

2) have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

nooooope // nah

3) what was your last text message?

my phone is dead so i wouldnt be able to tell you lmfao i dont even remember // it was a gif from kelly lol

4) what do you see yourself doing in 10 years?

hopefully working a job i enjoy and making costumes and being happy!! // god i have no idea and it freaks me out... hopefully working,,

5) if you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?

hoommee ((or at katsucon tbh)) // at the beach with friends maybe

6) what was your coolest halloween costume?

a white cat probably lmao // i dont think ive ever had a particularly exciting halloween costume but one year i was sharpay from high school musical and i think i peaked then tbh

7) what was your favorite 90s show?

uhhhh….. i didnt really… start watching tv until like… the 2000′s so i really cant tell you man lol // spongebob started in 1999 does that coUNT,

8) who was your last kiss?

(answer redacted) // :/ someone should kiss me so i can change this answer lmao

9) have you ever been stood up?

nope // nah

10) favorite ice cream flavor?

vanilla w/ vanilla oreos ok u need to underst a n d // this hasn’t changed i haven’t had this particular ice cream in a long time but i still stand by it

11) have you been to las vegas?

nahh // nope

12) your favorite pair of shoes?

idk i have these black ones i wear everywhere lol // i have a pair of white sneakers that i refuse to stop wearing now

13) honestly, have you ever cheated on your significant other?

i wouldnt even consider it. // no bc i’m not a piece of shit lmao?

14) what is your favorite fruit?

hmmm…. pineapple orrr…. strawberries but only if they’re the really good kind like they have to be perfect // pineapple!!

15) have you talked to anyone on tumblr that you could see yourself dating/having sex with? if possible?

….. ye s… yes. // in the past apparently so but thinking about it now nah lol

16) are you into hookups? short or long term relationships?

hookups arent my thing eh i prefer long term relationships altho i cant really say ive been in a “long” term relationship pffff // i don’t think hookups will ever be my thing, emotionally long term relationships are what i’m here for but i’m also a Very Impulsive Person so i cant tell you if this will stay a fact :’)

17) do you smoke? if so, what?

nope dont wanna // no thanks

18) what do you do to get over your anger?

usually talk to people or shout into word // i have to vent about it to someone probably a thousand times even months or years after it happens tbh

19) do you believe in god?

nahh // nah

20) does the person you’re in love with know it?

i aint in love with anyone rn so no? // i’m not in love with anyone.

21) favorite position?

………….. for w hat………. // oh honey lmfao... N/A

22) what’s your horoscope sign?

virgo/ox ovob // Virgo/sun, Aries/moon, Libra/rising and Cancer/midheaven

23) your fears?

literally everything i already named a few so ill name some others… ghh anything in… the ocean or lakes and stuff frightens me and i really dont know why bu tlike…. fish and crabs and jellyfish and seaweed cuz it’s evil and stu f f basically anything that’s not a mammal or turtles or penguins…. lo l im a baby // uncertainty is a big fear of mine and also people being mad at me lmao... as far as physical fears though i have debilitating fears of almost all insects/arachnids and lobsters/shrimp/crawfish :^)))))

24) how many pets do you have? what kind?

two cats and a dog!! // one cat one dog

25) what never fails to turn you on?

i dunno,,/////// // lol neck biting/kissing oof

26) your idea of a perfect first date?

im okay with mostly anything i just really like spending time with the person ; v ; // i’ve never really had an answer for this? thinking about dates has always made me so anxious for whatever reason but i’ll be happy to just spend time with them doing whatever honestly, i’m a super indecisive person aha

27) what is something most people don’t know about you?

i dont really know tbh lmfao // i’ve considered in the past looking into mental conditions (anxiety/bpd/etc) to see if i might have one or two but i never want to say anything about it because i don’t want to self-diagnose anything.

28) what makes you feel the happiest?

nice weather and nice conversations w/ best people u//v//u // nice weather and hanging out with people who are fun and easy to talk to

29) what store do you shop at most often?

does….. arda wigs count or… // does arda wigs still count bc mood lmao but truthfully now it’s probably target

30) how do you feel about oral? giving and/or receiving?

kkdkjsfkjkjfj??fsfj/// go for i t??? i have no problems with i t??? i dont think ill ever be willing to put a dick in my mouth though // these random sexual questions thrown in here are something aren’t they lmao. not going to disclose much but i will stand by the fact that i will not put a dick in my mouth lo l

31) do you believe in karma?

sometimes ye // i believe that people will eventually get what’s coming to them but i don’t believe in karma as a solid concept if that makes sense? like i don’t think it’s guaranteed

32) are you single?

yup yup // yeah it’s been wild lmao

33) do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?

i think being sincere is the best way to apologize– if you truly mean it the person will know. you dont need to buy your forgiveness. // the best way to apologize is just to apologize sincerely and change your behavior if it’s applicable.

34) are you a good swimmer?

ehh??? im ok i guess– i took swimming lessons as a kid but i havent done legit swimming ever since then lmao,, ive always been best at the backstroke tho yea // i mean i have the ability to swim but i’m not olympic-worthy or anything lmao

35) coffee or tea?

ehhh im not big on either tbh // chocolate milk and you can fight me

36) online shopping or shopping in person?

depends what your shopping for i guess?? online is more relaxed i guess // online probably because shopping in person Gives Me Anxiety

37) would you rather be older or younger than your current age?

ehhh im happy where i am tbh // older

38) cats or dogs?

do not make me choose // cats and dogs* there i fixed it for you

39) are you a competitive person?

ahaa,,,,, oh god yeah,, // OOF yeah

40) do you believe in aliens?

i believe there’s life on other planets somewhere?? so i guess?? // i believe in aliens in the sense that there’s no way we are the only living life forms in the universe but not in the science-fiction way you feel me

41) do you like dancing?

i do but i suck at it lmao // i do but i: A- suck, and B- have no stamina

42) what kind of music to you listen to?

nearly everything tbh // i’m not picky when it comes to music but imma be real w u. almost all of the music on my phone is kpop. seventeen is my favorite group along with astro, and i also enjoy super junior, shinee, red velvet, etc among so many others,,, im pretty wide spread !

43) what is your favorite cartoon character?

i will never be able to pick just one // i’ll literally never be able to answer this

44) where are you from?

philadelphia uvu // philly!

45) eat at home or eat out?

hmmm at home. // at home

46) how much more social are you when you’re drunk?

i never plan on being drunk tyvm // i’ve never consumed alcohol in my life and to be Quite Fucking Honest i want nothing to do with it

47) what was the last thing you bought for yourself?

bracelets ! ; u ; // uh... excluding food and music... earrings i think

48) why do you think your followers follow you?

uhhhhhhh lmfao i have no idea i think… a good amount are for my cosplays at least?? or id like to think so lmfao but i really dont know pfft // my followers have just accumulated and hung around over the years... i know i gained a good amount from my snk days as arlert-the-troops and then through my haikyuu phase, whether it was for my cosplay or other posts that i made... whenever someone follows me now im not entirely sure what its for but i appreciate everyone who’s stuck around!

49) how many hours do you sleep at night?

it’s never regular man // 6-9 (lol) hours is pretty normal for me

50) what worries you most about the future?

everything tbh // the future as a concept worries me lol

#useless shouting #journal crap #sorry for so many personal posts lately ive been having fun with them lmfao

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theboykingofhell · 8 years ago

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what drugs have you tried and what were they like? have you ever tried ketamine?

i have tried coke, mdma, shrooms, lsa/morning glory and adderall!! i haven’t tried ketamine and don’t rly plan to cuz it doesn’t seem like my type of drug but who knows, man…

oh let me preface by saying everything besides the lsa i took while either drunk or stoned (or both…almost always both)… i RLY like mixing drugs but if you dont know about the multiplier effect, different drugs getting taken at once will have a different(and usually stronger) reaction than taking it by itself, so my experiences with everything might be WAY different than the norm, who knows

coke i didnt particularly like and i MIIIIGHT try it one more time like if it just happens to be in the area i wouldnt turn it down probably but i thought it was EH. (i was also drunk, stoned, and had mdma in my system, so).. it def gave me more energy, it made my tongue and hands numb, there was a slight like jittery feeling behind my eyes, like my vision itself was buzzing a lil which made looking at things fun… honestly tho? it just made me feel manic. i’m manic all the time, bruh, dont need a drug to help me with that… 2/10 not in a rush to try again

mdma i LOOOOOVED…. it and shrooms are tied for my favorite drugs holy FUCK. again, i think its a drug that most people use to elevate mood because, again, it booted me towards feeling manic, but i feel like it was a little calmer with mdma than with coke (aka no jitters, no bursts of energy rly, it felt more subtle). everything got nice and loose which was nice. when you’re moving it’s GREAT, it just fades into the background and just makes everything feel more intense and makes you feel more present in it. every time i was still, tho, i NOTICED it, because it would all whoosh into my head (i get like that when i’m stoned too so that could’ve been cuz of the pot). MDMA MAKES SEX S O GOOD I CAME FAR TOO MUCH AND IT ALMOST KILLED ME LMFAO. it just makes skin feel.. REALLY GOOD…. NICE GOOD FEELS… like i’m constantly just almost JUST able to float out of my skin and HAVING skin is the only thing keeping me from levitating up into the sky, it’s wonderful. usually you get a crash after taking it where you get depressed apparently but i didn’t ever get like that the times i did it. also, mdma would make me hallucinate a little… don’t know why! they were mostly all visual and almost always the same one, i would start seeing little kalaidescopes everywhere and the colors were always green to purple to red and all these made-up colors in between…. and this would happen if i tried to focus on one thing for more than 5 seconds… for a while afterwards those little hallucinations would come back, at first with the same like NICE GOOD FEELS and later it’d just be the hallucinations themselves… usually triggered by coming cuz both times i tried mdma i ended up having sex on it SO YEAH… DEF RECOMMEND, DRINK LOTS OF WATER

shrooms.. are… i have a tag dedicated to the experience lmfao. i’ve had it 3 times, and it was always after eating an edible at some point beforehand. i have a friend who had a rly bad trip once and another who, after doing acid (and having a fine trip), ended up getting triggered into a psychotic break, so i was worried about freaking out and i found that just getting a little stoned beforehand keeps me relaxed the whole time but also made the high stronger… it’s just amazing. incredibly spiritual, a LOT more physical than i thought it would be. it’s… all-encompassing. my friend and i, after we did it together, explained it like…you TRY and explain it but it’s something you only rly have words for it while you’re on it, and you just lose the ability to fully, accurately comprehend it when you return. like, at times i felt like i WAS god, at time i felt like i was being hurtled through universes, at times i felt the LITERAL FABRIC OF REALITIES like i could SEE THEM and i could dip my fingers through them and i could see the strings of time and fucking touch them and it’s so powerful and visceral and REAL… it’s honestly insane. i described it AS going insane, like at points i just… would see the state in my mind labeled ‘sanity’ and i phased through it and went beyond. you become so… wise???? you suddenly have access to languages and colors and senses that never and always existed??? but i also can’t stress just how STUPID you get. conversations would go from describing the secrets of life and death and the universe to thinking you turned into a chipmunk.. my friend nearly fucked his guitar and, tbh, i almost did to,,,. sometimes i couldn’t stop moving and other times i would just be laying on the floor completely stil before SUDDENLY JOLTING UP AND SCREAMING cuz my soul had floated out of my body, danced through a star and suddenly CRASHED back into my flesh vessel. the longest trip was 4 hours… all my hallucinations that i had were visual or tactile, the visual ones were very innocent and subtle… like, one trip, everything would get fuzzy in a way where it looks like someone had painted the world with smears of watercolors.. but my friend, who took WAY stronger shrooms (THE strongest, while i took the weakest) would literally SEE ducks and cubes and shit morphing in front of him… EVERYTHING is weird, like all your senses switch places with each other and suddenly you can touch with your eyes and taste sounds and music got RLY scary and i wish i got to see what sex on shrooms is like but.. alas…

LSA is something a lot of ppl have never heard of, so let me explain it!! morning glory is a type of flower… the seeds contain something called LSA which is PRETTY MUCH a natural form of acid… so, if you eat enough of the seeds it will make you trip!!! it was the first drug i ever took (even before drinking and smoking)… it lasted a long LONG time, like 16 hours straight. i would see rainbows like emenating from every tree and also i rolled pantless on my carpet for like half of those hours cuz the sense of touch was so NIIICE it just made everything feel so nice and warm, i would get a lot of ripples of sensation and i was HYPERaware of my insides which felt gross and made eating impossible but it was a great experience, especially if it’s your first time trying drugs +o+ warning it does make a lot of people nauseous tho, i was fine but if anyone tries it, make sure to wash it RLY well because these are quite literally flower seeds so they are covered in pesticides..

adderall i’m putting here cuz it’s something i use recreationally, i’ve never had it prescribed but i love it SO much. mostly i just use it to keep me grounded… sometimes pot makes me rly paranoid and anxious (and i don’t even have an anxiety disorder so i have absolutely NO basis or idea how to cope with it so i freak out twice as much) and i’m just very uncomfortable with being… ‘chill’? it makes me feel nonfunctional haha so i usually take adderall with it to be able to function again. when i take a shitload it can make me very jittery tho, like… cranked up with caffiene jitters… the FIRST TIME i tried adderall was the best time because, god, the FOCUS of adderall combined with the impulsiveness of being drunk holy FUCK. SO fun. it’s just a nice thing to keep you composed when you’re doing a lot of party drugs, especially once you get used to it and know how to monitor it well. it’ll keep you tethered to a certain level while also making that level stronger… LOTS of bad effects with it though so this rly is one to be careful of but it’s so useful goddamn

AND YEAH THAT’S IT SO FAR…. like literally so many of my friends are into trying shit (actors, man..) so who knows what i’ll have to add to this list by next year jnlggs

#Anonymous #ask tag #SENDS YOU OFF WITH KISSES.... i wrote this instead of paying attention in physics lmfao #drunkbloggin #drugs tw

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nemento-mori · 8 years ago

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I was tagged by @11thcentury ! tysm!

last…

1. drink: Uhh Either milk straight outta the jug or half melted cherry slurpee from 7/11 i can’t remember which

2. phone call: My mom

3. text message: “Like horseianity or smthn” from @funeral-on-the-roof dfdsjfhsj

4. song you listened to: Revali’s theme from botw

5. time you cried: urrghhhh abt a month ago or smthing it was Insecurity Hour™ (aka 2:30 am)

have you ever…

6. dated somebody twice: no

7. kissed someone and regretted it: No but tbh ? i probably will somewhere down the line

8. have been cheated on: no thank god

9. lost someone special: definitely :(

10. been depressed: lmfao,,,,,, y a

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: EUgh no i hate throwin up regularly I don’t think i’d ever get drunk enough to throw up

favorite colors…

12. to wear: all colors tbh!! rly like blue n pink tho

13. My fave colors are changing all the time but I really like colors that make my mouth tingle?? like rly bright sour looking colors like,, yum

14. Warm colors r very good ones

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends: yeah absolutely!

16. fallen out of love: nooope

17. laughed until you cried: W/ the ppl i know??? lmfao fuck yeah

18. found out somebody was talking about you: No thank god

19. met somebody who changed you: i dont think so? so no i guess

20. found out who your friends are: yea but not in a bad way

21. kissed somebody on your facebook list: no!!

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: All of mine, I’m not into adding ppl I don’t know.

23. do you have any pets: YES. A dog named Bubba and three cats (cupcake, callie, n chihiro)

24. do you want to change your name: No its pretty good! idk what i’d even change it to

25. what did you do for your last birthday: I think I skipped school and went to the zoo which is smthing i do like every birthday.

26. what time did you wake up: Today? 9:35

27. what were you doing at midnight: playing bl2 w/ some friends!

28. name something you can’t wait for: to start my field biology class!!!

29. when was the last time you saw your mom: uhhhhh like 3/4 hours ago now, her and my dad went to see a movie.

30. what are you listening to right now: nothing atm but thats bc i’m typing this and i just realized my song ended 20 minutes ago

31. have you ever talked to someone named tom: Technically, there was a kid in my school named Thomas that I chatted 2 for a bit but idk if he went by tom.

32. something that gets on your nerves: When ppl think that their overly cynical and negative behavior is “realistic” and “grownup” and other ppl are childish and naive for thinking positively

33. most visited website: tumblr and youtube tbh...

34. hair color: brown but I just bleached it to a rly cute orangy blonde!

35. long or short hair: My hair is short, just above shoulder length but I normally have it a little shorter

36. do you have a crush on somebody: No, I haven’t in a very long time.

37. what do you like about yourself: I’m kinda weird n awkward sometimes and it used to bother me, but now I’ve grown to like it and accept it! Now I find it endearingly odd.

38. piercings: No, tho i’ve always kinda considered ear piercings after seeing rly cute earrings and cuffs TTmTT

39. blood type: lmfao idk

40. nickname: Becka! Tho the old ppl at my church always call me becky?

41. relationship status: Single

42. zodiac: Libra! (capricorn moon/Leo rising)

43. pronouns: she/her

44. favorite tv shows: I dont rly watch tv, mainly netflix n hulu. I just finished Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency and it was RLY good I totally recommend. I LOVE watching Expedition Unknown tho Josh Gates is my idol I aspire to be him

45. tattoos: no but I wouldn’t mind getting one!

46. right or left handed: right!

47. surgery: Yah a couple! I had an extra tooth in the roof of my mouth when I was younger, I had a suspicious mole that was cut out (non cancerous tho) and I got my wisdom teeth removed! (had an extra 1 of those too :’) )

48. sports: i used to take Okinawan Karate, kinda want to get back into it!

49. vacation: My last vacation was to Dollywood with my mom n siblings, it was awesome!

50. pair of trainers: is this abt shoes????

51. eating: Nothing rn, but my little sister made cheesy noodle stuff a while ago for dinner

52. favorite drink: TEA i love that shit, especially floral tea.

53. what are you up to: Answering this lol

54. waiting for: Parents to come home and tell me abt the movie

55. want: some chips... or just junkfood

56. get married: maybe?

57. career: OOOOO so many idk, artist, environmental biologist, idkdikdikd

58. hugs or kisses: hugs!!

59. lips or eyes: on me? neither <:///

60. shorter or taller: Tall. I wanna be a little taller.

61. older or younger: Either or rly!

62. nice arms or stomach: tough one!! both lol

63. hook up or relationship: relationship deff! Hookups just aint for me

64. troublemaker or hesitant: I’ve wanted 2 be a troublemaker n bold since i was born but alas I am trapped in a hesitant girls body,

65. kissed a stranger: no no no n on o

66. drank hard liquor: NO

67. lost glasses/contact lenses: Kinda, my cats like to knock my glasses off my nightstand and then I have to get my fam to help me find them ._.

68. turned someone down: yea :////

69. sex on the first date: Not for me no no no

70. broken someone’s heart: God I hope not!!

71. had your heart broken: No

72. been arrested: No, i am a good noodle

73. cried when someone died: yes.

74. fallen for a friend: no >o<

do you believe in…

75. yourself: Yeah but sometims I get frustrated at my own skill cap.

76. miracles: Id like to believe so, its good to believe in good things.

77. love at first sight: eh??

78. santa claus: I used 2!

79. kiss on the first date: yeah if the chemistry is right then fucking do it

80. angels: ehhh not particularly?? I mean I love the aesthetic tho

81. current best friends names: Aaron, Isaac, Kaili, Julia!

82. eyecolor: Green/blue color!

83. favorite movie: EMPERORS NEW GROOVE. ALSo Kubo and the Two Strings!

I tag uh, @sour-limelight @funeral-on-the-roof and @faebaeb !

#tag meme #this was pretty fun!#scheming weasel

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eldritchlulz-blog · 8 years ago

Text

that went well

nick and moire have irreconcilable differences

LAST WEEK

eldritchlulz

so are ye gonna eat paper airplanes all through class tomorrow too or ye gonna tell me what the problem is

nickatnightwalker

my appetite for paper airplanes is endless munro

eldritchlulz

great

hope yer hungry for that shiny stuff they print photos on

nickatnightwalker

ugh cmon that shits so bitter it's like letting advil dissolve in your mouth

eldritchlulz

ye know the terms of the deal walker

ye'd be doing yer stomach a favor

nickatnightwalker

it's not liver damage but we all have our vices

eldritchlulz

that's true

but yer liver's probably not gonna thank ye for bitter advil paper either

what if i made a really big one out of a whole newspaper

antonov an-225

nickatnightwalker

at least buy me a latte to wash it down with

ALSO LIKE A WEEK AGO

eldritchlulz

[moire makes good on her promise in class today. nick gets an expertly-aimed airplane to the cheek within the first ten minutes of class. it's folded from stiff glossy photo-printing paper, which she bartered from the amorphous art supply guardian in exchange for a memory. then he gets another airplane to the temple. and another. and another. long months of fucking around in class have made her an expert at predicting how long professor mothman will have his back turned to the board.] lattes are for when yer not being a dick, [she tells him after class, peeling off down the hallway to physics] i’ll make ye tea though if ye manage to eat em all

TWO DAYS AGO, post sharing dragon videos

eldritchlulz

so are we friends again or nah

YESTERDAY

nickatnightwalker

i cant read this over the noises my stomach is still making as it digests photopaper

eldritchlulz

ye could have had tea

nickatnightwalker

it was a pride thing

eldritchlulz

i didn't think ye had any left after the third airplane

nickatnightwalker

you would be shocked at how much i manage to retain no matter what i swallow

eldritchlulz

i guess we all have our talents

nickatnightwalker

damn straight munro

some are just more highly sought after than others

eldritchlulz

who knew airplane eating is so decidedly respected

nickatnightwalker

anyone in the aviation industry duh

eldritchlulz

well don't forget who helped launch yer career when yer famous and shit

nickatnightwalker

yeah ill try not to forget the little people

eldritchlulz

yer like a foot shorter than me

nickatnightwalker

oh well obviously im talking about personality

eldritchlulz

then yer like two feet shorter

nickatnightwalker

hair doesnt count

neither does punching

eldritchlulz

luckily those aren't personality traits

nickatnightwalker

exactly

which is why youre the little people and im not

eldritchlulz

lmao all ye have in yer corner is being tiny and rude

nickatnightwalker

youd be surprised how far those two things can get you in life

eldritchlulz

good for ye

nickatnightwalker

thanks it's been an uphill battle but 18 years in im starting to get the hang of using that stuff in my favor

eldritchlulz

great

TODAY

nickatnightwalker

since youre technically millys aunt im donating a full sentence of real talk which is that i dont really fuck with public drinkers

eldritchlulz

why not enough personality for ye

ye get high all the time

nickatnightwalker

yeah, and all that happens is i chill out

eldritchlulz

is this because of the movie night?

did we do something to ye?

nickatnightwalker

no it's just not my thing ok

i dont babysit lightweights and hanging around them always turns into that anyway

eldritchlulz

lmao i mean ye didn't and no one asked ye to

nickatnightwalker

no offense but have you ever hung out with drinkers because no matter the fuck what eventually

eventually

nickatnightwalker

it's the one sober person's job to console whoever just started crying and stop the fights and driving and unprotected sex and i have plenty on my plate right now without heading down that road so i really, really prefer not hanging with people who get drunk on wine during disney movie night like you do you and shit but it's not my scene

eldritchlulz

i know yer from like

the city and shit

but here i’ve only ever drank with misha and some of the girls in proteus and it’s never been like that

i don’t know in what world ye think ye have to take care of us

eldritchlulz

i don’t want that lmao and i definitely don’t need it

nickatnightwalker

good to know but there's still that second hand embarrassment factor and the smell of rancid grapes to figure in

like i just dont like hanging with people drinking it's not that deep

eldritchlulz

good thing ye’ve never done anything embarrassing like proposition yer supposed cousin over the pa system

that’d be real fuckin awkward

whatever walker

if yer gonna ditch cus one night out of the months ye’ve been here we did something that ye didnae like that didnae even affect ye

then seriously

whatever

nickatnightwalker

lmao at least i did it fully aware of what i was doing

nickatnightwalker

like damn munro cant a guy choose his company based on personal preferences

eldritchlulz

lmao weak

i do enough embarrassing stuff sober too kill me for having a good night where i didn’t worry about shit

and ye sure can

my personal preference is hanging out with people who don’t flake without even a heads up

evens out

nickatnightwalker

it's not flaking if we never had plans like ho ly shit why is this such a big deal you wanna get shitfaced and turn your head into a fish that's your prerogative and it's mine not to stick around while it's happening i dont particularly care why you did it im sure being drunk was a blissful reprieve from your tortured thoughts or whatever and i respect that i just dont want to be there

eldritchlulz

gods ye are literally the one who made this into a big deal nick i just said whatever like three times ye dinnae have to justify yer weird hypocritical bullshit to me

no one said ye had to watch when there were a thousand other things to do and pay attention to that night but yeah ignoring a friend for weeks and not letting them know what’s up is a shitty thing to do and i was trying to like check in but it turns out the mistake was thinking that we were friends in the first place so like i said

whatever

nickatnightwalker

i was doing plenty of other things that night and i really dont get why you cant run it through your hair that i dont fuckin like hanging around drunks and forgive me for not realizing we were at the bffs for life stage and thinking it wouldnt be a big deal to drop off your proverbial sea charts

eldritchlulz

oh nice so i'm a drunk cus i had some wine that’s incredibly reasonable of ye top of the fucking class

i wasn’t saying we were bffs lmao yer supposed to be the human don’t ye have a basic concept of how human relationships work ye don’t have to be bffs to not be a total asshole

nickatnightwalker

you were drunk i dont know what gentle terminology you want me to use here like was i supposed to hand you an official notice like dear mr and mrs munro this is a letter of resignation on the basis that i dont fucking roll with public wastedness

nickatnightwalker

god i thought you were buried deeper in your hypermasculinity than getting ratty because i decided i didnt wanna hang with you your boy and a bottle of something that could strip paint off a car

eldritchlulz

the utter fuckin logical leaps yer going through to make hanging out with us about drinking constantly is amazing ye gonna mentally photoshop bottles of liquor into all the times we hung out where we weren’t drinking too

and ye can fuck off with the hypermasculinity bullshit it’s bad if i am and bad if i’m not to ye sorry i don’t fit the perfect image of rambo lmao almost like the way ye stereotype everyone isn’t the way they really are

i don’t get how i’m the fucking unreasonable one here for thinking that i’d fucked something up and wanting to fix it and instead getting a thousand word essay where ye reiterate the point that got old the second time ye said it

luckily ye can consider yerself off the hook

nickatnightwalker

if ive said it so many times then why isnt it going through

nickatnightwalker

and like damn do you think youre like picking away at my layers of carefully crafted denial to get to the real reason i dont wanna hang with you guys anymore or something like i told you it's not that deep and just because i expected you to be oozing masculinity like a frat boy's sti doesnt mean it's a good thing that usually you are

eldritchlulz

trust me i'm not under any delusion that yer deep lmao

it came through loud and clear the first time

so like i said four fucking times

whatever

yer off the hook

see ye in class

nickatnightwalker

yep, this shallow bitch'll catch you later than you overhyped blowfish

eldritchlulz

also weak

nickatnightwalker

yes, i know, your muscles schwarzenegger youll be back etc etc etc

#rip kids #no one is reasonable #ooc #im #nickatnightwalker

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eggroll-sushi · 8 years ago

Note

1-150 ask mem

first of all, fuc k yoou

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

my mom??

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

outgoing around friends

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i dont know, ive heard that no one really hates me but like i find it difficult to find someone who i actually enjoy talking to

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i dont really have any interest in anyone rn so... yes? id take care of myself

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

so far everyone that ive liked is a either a nerd or a pretty shitty person so like ,

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

in what way?? idk im still thinking of this oe guy he had his pants pulled up pretty high with a tight belt on and a big nose. im not thinking in a romantic way or anything i just... it was a weird combination. . ..his hair was ok i guess

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

uh yeah if its not in the brash or crude humor way

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“probably”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

killer - bastille, yeah i dont have any others that stand out particularly

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

i have curly hair so we just both suffer if they try running their hands through... but if i had a romantic s/o i probably wouldnt mind bein petted

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

yes? i think so

15. What good thing happened this summer?

i hung out with friends a lot.. .i think i dont remember

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

yeah i lovemy mom

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

scary either way.. but the universe is pretty big so i guess

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

not really theyre an asshole mostly

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i havent taken a bath in like 4 years.. but yes

20. Do you like your neighbors?

we do not talk

21. What are you bad habits?

being rude and disrespectful and aggressive

22. Where would you like to travel?

europe.. japan.. idk

23. Do you have trust issues?

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

sleeping and eating

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

i really dont know.. its like an all around tie.. .

26. What do you do when you wake up?

brush teeth and wash face, change into outside wear if im going outside, lotion my face and put on mascara, make tea/breakfast

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

overall just smoother.. like a more even tone.. but darker i guess

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

y ou

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

ive dated.. once but i didn’t even like the guy.. i just said yes because it was like. .mmkfkucin 5th grade and then he broke up with me (i didnt care tbh) and then asked me back?? it was weird because he told me he was breaking up because he found.. someone hotter or something and they said if he dumped me they would date him and they didnt.. .it was wild tbh i dont really know why they did this it was like 6th grade. ......... ... .anyways

30. Do you ever want to get married?

theoretically, yes? but idk it seems exhausting and i cant grasp the concept of someone actually liking me for so long

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

fuck i dont know i dont really think about that buds

33. Spell your name with your chin.

gthhju-asnhhy

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

no unless robotics counts

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

yes

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

i just try to do something funny

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

nice, a kind person, likeable, liberal, ,

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

tjmaxx, marshalls, burlington. i go stright to that mf clearance section

40. What do you want to do after high school?

perferably die, but thats unlikely so i wanna go into a good college, make friends, get a decent job

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

my mind says yes but my heart says no

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

1) tired 2) mad 3) i cant/dont wanna make conversation 4) im just .. zoned out

43. Do you smile at strangers?

if they smile first

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

im fucking terrified of both

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

i have to go to school or i feel like shit

46. What are you paranoid about?

every time im disrespectful, aggressive, or really any action that i make

47. Have you ever been high?

48. Have you ever been drunk?

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

sure

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

it was a brownish orange (a coat with a hood)

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

give myself a massive sponge dick

53. Favourite makeup brand?

i dont really wear makeup.. i like ChapStick

54. Favourite store?

tjmaxx

55. Favourite blog?

@eggroll-sushi

56. Favourite colour?

orange? either a peachy orange or a borwnish orange. but i can appreciate a good palette

57. Favourite food?

id say pho but i like a lot of foods

58. Last thing you ate?

oreos and milk

59. First thing you ate this morning?

blueberry english muffin with honey butter

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

recently my team won a robotics comp

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

62. Been arrested? For what?

jesus no

63. Ever been in love?

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

well ... my mo was telling me goonight-- (i havent had one)

65. Are you hungry right now?

yeah

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

my tungle friends are also my irl friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter (i dont use either)

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr? i hate it tho

69. Are you watching tv right now?

n o

70. Names of your bestfriends?

you know who

71. Craving something? What?

food.. savory junk food........olives, nachos, ,,

72. What colour are your towels?

white

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

two, but i have 3 on my bed

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

i just keep em on my bed yeah

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

4 on my bed (god bless your soul, okoshi, wherever you are) but like.. 10 total?

75. Favourite animal?

cat but i also like most animals

76. What colour is your underwear?

its currently gray

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

dark chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

blue moon

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

black with white text

80. What colour pants?

shades of gray

81. Favourite tv show?

su? i dont really watch any others

82. Favourite movie?

the man from uncle movie/ kingsman

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

mean girls?

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

mean girls i guess

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

idk

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

starfish

87. First person you talked to today?

mom

88. Last person you talked to today?

you

89. Name a person you hate?

protein shake (jk)

90. Name a person you love?

my mother

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

maybe

92. In a fight with someone?

im constantly in a fight

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

one

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

many, over 10

95. Last movie you watched?

Logan

96. Favourite actress?

janelle monae always looks stunning

97. Favourite actor?

uhhhhhhhhh dwayne is a friend

98. Do you tan a lot?

yes?

99. Have any pets?

100. How are you feeling?

sick

101. Do you type fast?

not really

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

yes

103. Can you spell well?

yeah i guess

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah i suppose

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i went on a camping enrichment?

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

no?

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah

108. What should you be doing?

studying for histry quiz

109. Is something irritating you right now?

yes

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

no?

111. Do you have trust issues?

im pretty sure this was already asked

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

mom?

113. What was your childhood nickname?

ass (im still a kid, right?)

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

when someone has one

116. Are you listening to music right now?

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yes

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yes

119. Favourite book?

harry potteR?

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

yes

121. Are you mean?

yes

122. Is cheating ever okay?

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

no. once i stepped in a massive puddle and got wet like halfway up my calf

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

125. Do you believe in true love?

n..yes?

126. Are you currently bored?

yes

127. What makes you happy?

friends, having a good time, making people laugh

128. Would you change your name?

129. What your zodiac sign?

scorpio

130. Do you like subway?

yeah

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

we would both suffer

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you (this is a repeat again)

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

i could, yes

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

bro idk

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed

137. How tall are you?

5′4″?

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i have curly hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette

140. Summer or Winter?

summer

141. Night or Day?

cant choose

142. Favourite month?

november

143. Are you a vegetarian?

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

dark

145. Tea or Coffee?

tea

146. Was today a good day?

eh i guess

147. Mars or Snickers?

mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“you’re like shaggy from scooby doo; always alone”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

yes? im scared of them so

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“’You will blow your eyes out,’ said Nwoye’s mother...” (Things Fall Apart)

#captaincreashion

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ecotone99 · 6 years ago

Text

[MF] To Love The Wind_A Simple Beauty

So ive been wanting to write a novel for a long time now, but it never seems to pan out for whichever reason, mostly i have a hard time finding good inspirstion plot wise. Tonight, me and my girl were reading a short story about the God Of Arepo, and she asked me if id be able to write something similar. What i came up with is kind of metaphorical for both of our lives, so its a little sappy, and honestly im a pretty meh writer in general so also meh. But it felt good to write again for the first time in a while, and if j can continue to find the inspiration, i may expand this into a short novel. Either way its not done, and ill probably be posting the next couple parts soon. Also im new to reddit so be gentle if i dont get how this place works. But dont be gentle on the story, rip me a new one, reafirm all my self doubts and self loathing please.

To Love The Wind Over the ages, people have made a dozen limericks and expressions about love, and how it can save you. But Sevi never thought much of those old tales. Something about it was off to her. If you need it to save you, is it really love? If someone can really love someone, did they ever need saving? No, since she could walk, Sevi fought tooth and nail not to love people, not really. People could be fun maybe, but the more she started to love someone, the more she worried they changed her, claimed her.

She would rather love the trees and the wind. The meadows and the winds, the road beneath her, the worn sandals that kept her feet from bruising on the stone, everything she could find to love. For but a moment, as she scrambled for something new. She never really stopped loving, not once she had started, but rather just leaped and ran, constantly scouring for something new, someone new, something to outshine the last. The dew on the grass never lost its shine, the blue copper that streaked the mountains never lost its luster. But who could remember that, when staring at the sun.

For most of her young life, this suited Sevi just fine. Her feet always licked by thorns and brambles, but if you just keep running, the sting never really stuck. Until one day, she got herself caught. As she looked at herself in a creek by her favorite meadow, something just didn’t seem right any more. No longer did her hair seem to shine, her eyes seem to luster. And on that day, she gave up her love. She stopped running, and lay down to weep, and eventually, to rest. Others still saw her beauty, but to her, she was like bark on a tree. So like a tree, she planted herself, down in her favorite meadow, where she could be alone in her favorite patch of moss, in the shadow of an ugly old oak tree. And from that patch, she never rose, not when people came to wake her, not when family came to leave offerings of flowers and jewelry at the roots of her tree.

A Simple Beauty People rarely starved in the valley between the green hills, and rarely were they put to flame. But rarely did they see the beauty of the outside world; the shining seas, and high peaks, the gilded halls of lords, or the mosaiced temples of gods. But the people of green hills were happy with their simple beauties. One such beauty, was a particularly ugly oak tree, in a particularly plain meadow. It sat on the banks of a thin, muddy stream, shading a patch of moss, where old folks often sat down for lunch, and children or young lovers sat to skip stones.

It was an ugly tree maybe, but its boughs gave shade for beautiful things. And from time to time, people around the meadow would take turns tending to the tree, to the little patch of moss they all visited from time to time, but no one thought much of it.

One day, some soldiers came through town, brandishing no torches or swords, but searching for more who might. With them came a young soldier, one from a town nearby, who didn't really know why he’d joined. His whole life he’d had little to fight for, and money was a good enough reason he supposed.

As he strolled about, his hand resting on the pommel of his new sword, he lifted his eyes a bit for the first time, proud in a small way to see himself as a man. But without a way to prove it, he knew it wouldn't last.

On his walk, he chanced upon a small meadow, where a young couple sat beneath and old oak, and he thought to himself “That’s what I should fight for. For a place I can call my own, a home with simple beauties.” But try as he might, the words rang hollow in his mind. Still, the small beauties of the valley did him well, for the months he stayed there.

But the soldiers who marched over those hills one frigid winter cared little for their simple beauties. The green hills had burned before, and surely they would again, and the people who lived there simply left, with tired eyes, and heavy hearts. Not everyone could run, but the local soldiers laid no claim to the valley, and decided to leave rather than defend it. But as one young soldier strolled about the hills in his camp, he looked down on what felt like his home, saw what felt like his family he never knew, the old or long rooted, the few who defiantly refused to run.

He saw them being slaughtered by men with swords and horses and fire, and he though to himself, “This is what I’ll fight for, for people I can call my own, So others can live their lives in peace, without worry.” And though the words rang hollow, he charged down the road to help his neighbors, not caring if an arrow found his heart, or a sword his throat. But it wasn’t an arrow or a sword that found him, but a stray hoove, that set his eyes to black.

When he woke, he found a village in ruins, the last of the fires smoldering in the cold wind. As he stumbled to his feet, he searched for a place to rest, someone to fight, someone to help, anything to make him feel lucky to be alive. But all the houses had burned, all the soldiers gone, and the villagers dead or captive. And as he started to lose hope, he found himself lying in a patch of moss, near a small creek, kept running from the muddy water that wouldn’t quite freeze. And he looked up, at his favorite, ugly oak, its boughs torn and frozen, its meadow set in snow and ash and gore. But despite everything, it still stood, sheltering its little patch of moss from the storm and war.

He looked around with tired eyes, and found himself hungry, starving really. For a day he lay there, too tired and dazed to move. But the tree sheltered him, and the moss eased the pain in his back, the gurgling of the creek soothed him. When finally he sat up, calm, but famished, he saw the wilted offerings at the base of the tree, old flowers and jewelry, and thought to himself “I must not be the only one who loves this tree”.

“I guess I owe you a favor eh?” He said, half bored, and half lonely “I’ve not much to offer. But you can have this… I won’t be needing it any more.” And he laid his sword at the base of the tree.

He set about, and looked for something to eat, but all the fields and stored had been pillaged and burned, the game all scared away. After searching for what felt like hours, he sat back down in his patch of moss, despondent. But as he did, he saw something new, something he hadn’t noticed before. In the muddy little creek, was a small noose trap, likely set by a child in hopes of catching a minnow. And in that trap, was a small, shrivelled fish, still wiggling. As he went to pry the fish, he found a bush of berries, hidden away by the boughs of the oak.

Looking at the great oak, and some of its branches, scattered across the ground, he decided to make a fire. “Im sorry tree” He said as he lit it “Already you’ve done me so much, but it seems ill need your help some more.”

The fish, though shriveled, felt satisfying to him, and the berries delicious. “You’ve done me so much, but I’ve never got your name” He said, half to himself, “Well you can have mine if it matters. I’m Aren.”

Much to his surprise, the tree responded, in a quiet, feminine voice “I'm Sevi.”

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comicteaparty · 6 years ago

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December 17th-December 23rd, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from December 17th, 2018 to December 23rd, 2018. The chat focused on Lovespells by Ryan & Sage.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Lovespells by Ryan & Sage~! (http://lovespellscomic.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PST), so keep checking back for more! You have until December 23rd to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 3. Do you believe that Esther will eventually confess her feelings to Maria? What do you think it will take for that to happen given Ether’s shyness about it?

QUESTION 4. Given some further hints, do you believe Maria’s own feelings towards Esther are changing? How do you think Maria would react to a confession from Esther? Would a confession ruin their friendship?

snuffysam

only at the end of chapter 4, but loving it so far! here's my current answers... 1. definitely the scene at the end of chapter 4 where Maria asks Esther for more lessons/to hang out as friends. We already know what Maria's there for ahead of time, and I eat dramatic irony like that for breakfast. Also, the reactions of Maria's friends who see Esther's obvious crush. 2. Hmmmm Maria. She's this super cheesy knight type, and that's me babey.

3. Yes, and it will be an accident.

4. Just from what I've seen so far, Maria's feelings towards Esther have changed. The relationship started out super professional from Maria's point of view (Esther is just helping her level up her magic. strictly teacher/student) but now she sees Esther as a friend. At this point... I don't think Maria would find a new tutor after the confession like Esther thinks, she's too professional for that. But it may put a dent in their friendship if the feelings aren't reciprocated.

decademic

omg, blitzed through it again because I love these slow burn lesbians and their wonderful relationship~ honestly couldn't ask for more! the art's amazing, the story is paced so well, the panels honestly are on par with paranatural levels of forethought and care, just ooo! I love them!!! onto the questions... 1: oh gosh, I can barely choose! the first meeting, when Maria shows up at Esther's house with her friends and they see how oblivious Maria is, the critical hit scene...throw a dart, I love it. 2: I'm gonna have to say Esther, she's so relatable by nature, and her actions are so pure intentioned. the love potion instead of elixer moment was such a cute nod, I got heart eyes and pledged my soul immediately. 3: I want Esther to start to confess, but Maria stops her and confesses instead! cue teary eyes and a first real kiss~ 4: Maria needs to identify this feeling as love; real love, before anything in the relationship can move forward at all. therefore, there has to be some realization on Maria's side sooner than later to make it work. Esther would probably chicken out halfway through the confession and confuse them both, which is why I'm gunning for Maria to do it~

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What do you think happened to Esther in the past that caused a healing spell to give her a permanent mana siphon? Do you believe Esther will reveal whatever happened to Maria? What might be the consequences of Esther telling her or keeping it secret?

decademic

gosh, good question...

so I guess 5: Esther hasn't been holding back, per se, about her affliction, she was upfront about it to the nurse, and has answered Maria's questions, so I don't think it's a 'secret', but more of a bit of backstory that may be a bit hard to relive. none of this answers the question of what the affliction is but I'm sure that'll be addressed, I'm sure of it

snuffysam

I don't think it's anything particularly sinister or mysterious, just, like... some uncommon disease. like magic polio.

though i suppose it either has to be something difficult to explain or something with a big stigma attached to it?

RebelVampire

QUESTION 6. Do you think we’ll see the paladin who scolded Maria at the tournament again? Why do you think he seemed particularly critical of Maria? What role might he have to play in Maria’s life (and Esther’s by association)?

RebelVampire

1) i really enjoyed the scene where maria was with her friends and referred to esther as lovely and all maria's friends are like O/////O. i enjoyed it not only for the significant character development maria is showing, but also the sheer comedy in how oblivious maria is to anything to do with love. 2) maria. i like her intense honesty that is balanced by her flawed obliviousness to a lot of the things around her. i think its a combination that makes her extremely endearing as a character. 3) i think the clock is ticking. esther is clearly terrible at hiding it and stuffing her feelings down. and i think one day maria is gonna be like "i love this thing" and esther is gonna be like "oh yeah i love that thing almost as much as i love you." like maybe not that exactly, but i dont think esther will overcome shyness. i think its gonna be a pure mortification accident moment cause esther will be lost in her own brain thoughts.

4) maria's feelings are definitely changing. no doubt about it. as for a reaction to esther's confession...honestly maria is so dense i wouldnt be surprised if she just could comprehend a love confession. gets told "i love you" and shes like "i love you too....youre a dear friend." once she realizes though, i kind of feel like shell...limbo turn down esther and tell esther shes not sure how she feels. then decide and couple will be created. as for ruining their friendship, eh, therell be tension maybe? not friendship ruining tho cause maria is just too nice for that. 5) I'm gonna assume that it was some sort of injury to be honest. cause esther did mention wanting to be an adventurer and i could see esther being overenthusiastic and trying something dangerous and winding up permanently injured because of it. or poisoned maybe. thats also an option. but regardless the curitive magic came with a price. i think esther will tell maria the full story someday, and i think it will bring her and maria closer. and consequently cause maria to get ultra defensive against those questioning esther's honor. 6) i do think we'll see that paladin again, and boy am i looking forward to it. i want to know more about him cause i think the dynamic hed have with maria would be awesome. i think as far as role goes, he might be the one to challenge how maria handles herself as a knight and her general love obliviousness. because maria's friends and esther all kind of either find it endearing, support her, or just accept that is part of her. whereas i think this paladin could be the one to ask her if she isnt hurting others by being so oblivious to love while constantly giving everything of herself. or something like that.

snuffysam

ok i'm caught up i'm not sure about the paladin. because yeah maria's friends aren't exactly helping move this relationship forward but... why would the paladin do any better? he just seems like a jerk to me.

maybe he shows up again and gives maria something extra to vent about to esther?

also, apparently his name is marcus? at least that's what the cast page seems to say, it's hard to tell without pictures lol

thisintermezzo

I co-write this comic and aklsjdkjhffjk it's so cool to see people actually seriously talk about it??? Thank you so much for this. We almost never get actual responses--which is pretty normal for most comics; feedback is just hard to get, haha--so this is super novel and hugely appreciated. If you want to ask me anything, please feel free. Otherwise, I'm just going to spectate here and there. (Also, now that I have Discord again, I can try to similarly contribute to chats about people's comics!!)

snuffysam

welcome! this is a really cute comic! if I may ask a question - what was originally on this page?: http://lovespellscomic.com/post/162477687227/hey-this-post-may-contain-adult-content-so-weve

it was after a bunch of guest comics so i'm guessing it was another guest comic? but tumblr deleted it so i have no idea

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Do you believe Esther’s magic tutelage of Maria will pay off at a critical juncture at some point? How might Esther’s own skills change due to contact with Maria? How might their changing relationship affect their professional lives?

thisintermezzo

I can't tell, haha. I actually don't know what the page before that is, even, since the "back" button is gone. Tumblr is lame and didn't notify us of any of the flagged posts, so I have no clue what else has gotten randomly deleted. :U Tapas would have it all, though.

Thanks for letting us know, though! o/

RebelVampire

QUESTION 8. Do you think Maria’s friends will play a role in Esther and Maria’s budding relationship? If so, what role will they play and how might their own relationships with Maria change?

(the archive for the chat on Psychteria is up! @CalimonGraal https://comicteaparty.com/post/181287718835/december-10th-december-16th-2018-ctp-archive)

RebelVampire

@snuffysam sometimes strangers are more helpful than friends in certain contexts. cause friends can come with a lot of biases. but eh it was just a thought

7) I def hope esther's magic tutelage pays off. Though not sure when since the tournament seemed like the most dangerous thing to happen so far. but if maria goes on a mission for sure shes gonna be pulling out that crit move esther taught her and save the day. albeit alternatively i could also seeing it going the opposite. wherein maria tries and fails hardcore. and then esther has to hug and comfort her and tell maria its okay. as for esther's skills, i actually think any change is gonna be less related to magic and more esther is gonna learn like how to express her feelings better or something. but this is something i dont forsee happening until they get together. 8) i dont think the friends are gonna help. rather, i think after maria and esther get together maybe that theyre gonna hurt the relationship in a way. in that theyll get jelly of maria spending more and more time with esther. cause while maria sees esther a lot, theres clearly more freetime maria has she could spend with esther instead of her friends. and i could see maria doing that cause as nice as maria is, shes extremely inexperienced in this area. so i think shed put esther first way too hardcore at first and the friends would have to say whoa there hold your horses. i think at the end itll strengthen their bonds though cause itd give maria a better understanding of some of the experiences her friends have maybe. idk. im spitballing.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. If Esther and Maria do date, how do you believe that will go? What relationship obstacles might the two have to overcome in order to make their relationship work? How will the change affect the course of the story?

Delphina

Oh noooo, cute magical girl AND lawful good swordy girl having adorable crushes on each other. I might have to jump into this one.

1. My anime roots are showing, but I love a good "you don't have to refer to me with honorifics" scene. Also any time Maria carries sleepy Esther around is adorable.

2. Maria's hard not to like. I'm also a sucker for strong intense ladies who wanna do the right thing always.

I'm not so great with the speculation-type questions, but it's a great comic and I'm looking forward to what happens and hope that things go smoothly in both the romantic and magical arenas! The writing is very sweet and pure and the character designs and great environments complement them nicely. Really can tell there's a lot of love in this story!

RebelVampire

QUESTION 10. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

Delphina

I really enjoyed the part where Esther was explaining her sketches about adventuring to Maria. Esther has mostly been a reactive character - she gets orders and reacts, she's asked for help by Maria and she reacts, she sees some kids in trouble and she reacts, she gets low on MP and reacts. But that was the first time we saw what she wanted for herself, and how she views her role, and it really helped make her feel real and more proactive. I hope we see more of what Esther wants and who she is in the future!

RebelVampire

9) I think they'll have to deal with the usual relationship challenges. balancing work life, balancing other friendships, accepting that maybe they dont know each other as well as they think they might. but i think theyll manage. esther especially i think is gonna have to learn to be more open like how she was about her desire to be an adventurer. 10) I'm looking forward to seeing paladin returning and revealing why he's in this story in the first place and butting heads with maria. and then esther being "it's okay baby hes just a big ol' meanie"

snuffysam

i just really want to see more of the comic. it's super cute, the characters all lovable... i need more.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Lovespells this week! Please also give a special thank you to Ryan & Sage for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Lovespells, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://lovespellscomic.com/

Ryan & Sage’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/lovespells

Ryan & Sage’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/lovespells

Lovespells’ Twitter: https://twitter.com/lovespellscomic

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #book club #bookclub #webcomic book club #webcomic bookclub #comic tea party #ctp #lovespells #ryan & sage

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