#Also fuck Mahi Mahi

[thingsmysplattershotjrtoldme]

i wish anyone who uses a charger in turf a very lose.

[distortedkilling]

Mahito thinks if you like him like that you've got a level of freak in you that he's absolutely going to bully you over. And not nicely, regardless if it's reciprocated or not.

[chisatowo]

BIG RUNNNNNNNNNNNNN

[luxrayz64]

mahi mahi resort (splatoon 3) is such a fascinating map because the gimmick that made it so beloved on wii u was so hilariously fumbled in this rendition. for the first half of the match the map is so ridiculously tiny and cramped (smallest map in the game if I remember right) that it's downright fucking miserable to play on. there's no turf so everyone gets aggressive really fucking fast, and it's so fucking flat that hiding from anything that outranges you is nigh impossible. and then halfway through the match the water level drops, exposing more turf, creating more cover and increasing verticality, and suddenly it's actually a pretty okay map. and by the end of it I've forgotten how downright fucking miserable the first half of the match is

[galaxyhybridscentral]

had a splatoon dream

i had a dynamo (ew) and accidentally queued up into a mahi mahi game (ew), can't remember for the life of me what mode it was, but the stage looked weird? No idea, but i knew it was mahi mahi and so i went to jump in the water because i didn't wanna play mahi mahi but i swung my dynamo as i did and opened the map at the same time i think? didn't die to the water so long as i kept doing it and i got some crazy speed and height with it (height and speed gaining ended out of the water), ended up in the other base through the weird glitch (i knew it was a glitch in the dream because i do not know for the life of me how to hack) and started fucking around there, don't remember what i was doing, and then the game ended and i got kicked from the queue with a error/ban message but don't remember what it said

that was funny. and then it went into another dream but i don't remember it

[im-notbean]

Dating Killua Headcannons

(I'm in love with this gif. Shut tf up. Bask in it's glory.)

・Cat boy. Cat boy. Cat. Boy.

・No, being serious. Killua is a cat.

・He does that thing where he'll rub his neck or head into you when y'all are cuddling <3

・He also nocks random things over just cause...why the fuck not?

・I like to think Killua is pretty flirty

・But hates when he's being flirted to

・"Your cute Killua." "B-Baka! I'm not cute."

・*Ahem* Anyway.

・Killua is touch starved. Change my mind.

・I'm a personal beliver that Killua has a love hate relationship with praise

・Like, he likes giving praise

・But hates getting praise for some odd reason

・"Hey Y/N." "What babe?" "You have a nice face." "Aw, thanks. You have nice hair" "Baka. I don't"

(I don't remember how praise works ok- its like 5 in the morning okay, I'm watching an old punz vod. it's so old that the camera has the punz border lol.)

・I feel like Killua will just flop into your lap and cling onto you

・He also likes head pats

・Again, he's a cat

・I feel like he's not big on PDA in public but at home...

・He's all over you like your the center on the universe

・Definitely has shocked you before on "accident"

・I feel like he's the type of person to have no storage because he has so mahy pics of you

・I'd think that their all of you sleeping

・Again he's like a cat, sleep during the day and a ball of energy at night

・You both like knocking sense into Gon (you do don't lie)

Alright I'm done- also I sprained my finger today- hurts like a bitch right now but I'll survive.

[aaron-m-geist-ff]

For the NSFW alphabet:

N and W.

Yes, I would like to know the turn OFF´s for our blue haired curse. And the Wild Card.

If he has any at all. X)

And random headcanons are often hilarious.

Hell yeah! Thank you so much for the request 😄I am happy to deliver ;)

_______________________________________________

N - No-go. (Things that are a major turn off.)

Mahito doesn’t like when you try to push past your limits.

He knows that he has an insane amount of stamina, and your human body often struggles with taking that during sex. For that reason, Mahito constantly monitors you. He pays close attention to your reactions or your heartbeat. He even thinks in his head, asking himself how long it has been since you last drank a glass of water. Fuck. He also pays attention to how much you sweat. Mahito is very educated on how the human body works after doing so much research on the topic. He needs to make sure that he’s not hurting you.

But you’re such a slut for him. A lot of the times, you disregard your own well being just to give Mahito more pleasure. The curse bond makes you want to push past your limits in order to give your body to him. You genuinely want him to use you.

The idea of having you so eager to please is a huge turn-on, of course.

But if you start neglecting your own health and well-being??

No. Absolutely not.

Mahito can vividly remember the time that he fucked you when you woke up from sleeping for ten hours. You hadn’t drunken any water at all. Your body was heavy and sluggish as he thrusted into you from behind. You were moaning like crazy. He knew that you were enjoying it. But after a while, you started to speak in a way which didn’t make any sense. Slurring your words together and breathing harshly. Your heartbeat was going so fast. Your heart had to work twice as hard due to the dehydration.

It didn’t matter how much you moaned and begged him for more.

The second that Mahito realized the harm he was doing to your body, he instantly started to go flaccid and pulled out of you. He didn’t care about your whines. He simply got you a glass of water and forced you to drink it.

Mahito only likes giving you pain in the form of spanking or fucking you roughly. If it’s something seriously hurtful then he isn’t turned on by it.

“Stop whining, little human. You need water. Drink this for Mahi, mm?”

_______________________________________________

W - Wild card (any headcanon)

Mahito finds it so endearing that you enjoy braiding his hair. He loves to feel your hands on his scalp. Weeding through the soft strands of blue hair. You always seem so proud once you’re done. You smile so beautifully.

He also loves ice cream. Any flavor. Once you introduced him to it, he just couldn’t get enough. He likes to get ice cream in a waffle cone, that’s his favorite dessert. Mahi actually has quite the sweet tooth and he finds it very fun to decorate the ice cream with sprinkles and syrup.

Mahito actually doesn’t enjoy playing chess too much. He gets bored with it easily because it just isn’t stimulating enough for his intelligent brain. He only ever gives in and plays with you because he knows that it turns you on to see him win every time. ;)

Mahito likes seeing you wearing your pajamas. He thinks that they look cute on your smaller body. And it’s fun to see you in such casual attire. He likes the type of pajamas which have fun little patterns on them. Either funny or cute patterns would spark his interest.

One of these days, you will come up with the idea to gift Mahito a pair of bunny slippers and he will go absolutely insane. He’ll just wear them around the mansion constantly. Stomp around so that the ears will perk up with every step that he takes. He loves silly things like that.

Read more Mahito here

[ms--lobotomy]

Yes, I am aware that hemipenes are found on reptiles rather than Mahi Mahi. Mahi Mahi also nut in the ocean, and I'm not going to have him nut in your pool. I have standards. Konrad still has one nut. [Previous] [Next]

Summary: this is where you fuck for the first time

Word Count: 1314

Content Warnings: SMUT, giving reader stretch marks because I am feeling so silly, light monsterfucking, eatin out, squirting, crying during sex even though its really light sex

Image Credit: @squishyowl

He positioned you on the ledge, staring up reverently at you. He thumbed at your side and rested his head on your lap. The tips of his hair fell into the water, radiating out from him like the rays of the sun. You giggled.

"How do you get this thing off?" he asked, half taking the piss before tugging at the hem of your shirt. "Like this?" He began to pull it up. You lifted your arms. It came off, not unlike peeling a sticker from a smooth surface. He cast it aside before he snaked his way up your body. He pressed his head into your chest, the tip of his chin on your cleavage. Your legs parted, wrapping around him as much as they could.

"Two shirts?" he asked again. You felt clawed fingers slip under the back of your sports bra as he moved his face away from you slightly.

"It's... it's a sports bra." You turned your face away from him and folded your hands over your chest.

"A sports bra?" He tugged at the bottom of it.

"Y-yeah," you replied. You ran your fingers over your knuckles before you lifted your arms back into the air and he pulled off your soggy sports bra. His eyes widened.

"What is it?" you asked sheepishly.

"You..." he mumbled, grabbing for your breast and holding it in his hand. "It's you, my... liege."

You felt blood rush to your face as he kissed you right below the nub he wasn't holding. Your legs pressed against him, tightening like a vice. "Your liege?" you asked weakly. You tangled your hands in his hair, surprisingly soft under your fingers.

"Mine," he said as he pulled away briefly.

"Mm," you started, rubbing at his scalp. "Yours."

He ducked back in to bite you softly. His teeth were sharp against you, but you could still feel him holding back over your soft flesh. You inhaled sharply before letting out a slight moan and tilting your head back.

When you thought you couldn't take any more on the left, he moved to the right and started to work you there. You felt his teeth graze the most sensitive area on your chest, and a shiver went down your spine. You squeaked out his name, again and again.

After a while, he started to trail kisses down your stomach. He ran his claw along your stretch marks, making you shudder. As you looked down at him, he kissed every last one of them. His hands were at the small of your back now, pulling you in closer.

"Why are you...?" you trailed off before he shushed you with a finger to your lips.

"Let me love you the way you should be," he said, almost as if to himself.

You melted in his arms, leaning back over the wet concrete. He darted his arms over to catch you, meeting your soft flesh before it could tear open. You looked over yourself at him, legs opening instinctively before you realized that your shorts were still on.

"Let me get those off of you," he mumbled as he used his other hand to tug at your pants. He raised his eyebrows when he saw your underwear, but dutifully pulled them off as well. His hands met each other behind you, making something cool for you to lean back on. You shuddered as he closed his eyes, guiding himself to your needy cunt.

He was gentle. His tongue was rough; longer than it should be on him, but his eyes soon opened as he looked up at you. Your brain began to fog up, thinking of nothing but him pleasuring you. You cried out, soon putting a hand over your mouth. He moaned into you before he pulled away for just a second.

"You're safe with me. Let it out," he cooed, his thumb running over your shoulder.

A shiver went down your spine before you relaxed in him and your hand fell from your face. "I... am," you said weakly.

"You are," he replied, nuzzling between your legs before he began to feast again. You felt him hit places that someone shouldn't be able to, and you moaned softly as you ran your hands through his hair again. Your head tilted back, and you felt yourself squirt around him as a long and drawn out moan escaped your lips.

He cleaned you up as you bottomed out and clarity began to return to you. Your chest heaved up and down as he rocked you down into the water, carrying you to the shallow end of the pool.

"Mortarion..." you mumbled, arms wrapped around his neck.

"Yes?" he asked, sitting on the stairs and positioning you on his lap, facing him. His hands were on your waist, grinding you against his cocks.

"I..." you started, not quite knowing what to say.

"Is everything okay, liege?"

You felt tears begin to sting your eyes as you buried your face in his chest. "'m fine," you said, wrapping your arms around him.

He pried you off, tilting your face up as the red in your eyes became more pronounced. "You're crying," he said, running his other hand through your hair. "Does anything hurt?"

"Mmm, no," you replied, looking up at him. "Just not used to being treated like this, I guess."

He said your name, each syllable cascading gently from his mouth before he pulled you back towards him. "I won't hurt you," he said quietly as your hand brushed up against one of his cocks. "I won't hurt you. I promise." Your head was against his chest now, and you could feel his heartbeats thrum rapidly, his breath slightly ragged against you.

"I trust you," you said as you closed your eyes.

"Thank you," he said as he grabbed your waist and pulled you down on one of his cocks. You chirped, your eyes already rolling back and the tension in your shoulders releasing. You went limp against him as he slowly filled you out. He put a comforting hand to your back as he buried himself all the way in. He kept you there for a moment, panting slightly, before he thrust back a little bit and fucked into you gently.

Your eyes closed slightly as he took you, taking his time with you as his chest muffled your moans. He grunted with each thrust, and it made you bounce on him despite the slow pace. You moaned his name again and again, looking up at him.

He was smiling. It was a gentle expression on his face, which only brightened as he saw you look up at him. You threw your arms around him, whispering nonsense about how pretty he looked between thrusts.

When your eyes had fallen shut again, he took you off of him. They opened, and you looked down with a questioning gaze before he speared you back on his other.

"O-oh!" you cried as he began to resume his pace, staring lovingly down at you. "Mortarion--"

"What is it?" he asked. You felt him speeding up, and he snaked his way up the stairs quickly as you clenched around him. He turned so that you were facing the pool, and he was facing away.

"Mortarion, I'm about to-- aah!" you cried out, gushing on him again. You felt your vision blur for a moment before he came into you as well, throbbing. You felt your stomach grow with how hard he came, his other cock spurting helplessly onto the concrete. You collapsed on him, a heaving mess.

He leaned back, floating in the pool while you were atop him. He put his tail fin to you back, stroking it lightly. You moaned again, and he took one of your hands and pressed it against the top of his chest.

"You're safe here," he said.

"I am."

Taglist: @bispecsual @justeverythingnothingelse @bleedingichorhearts @nekotaetae @historitor-bookshelf

[nono-uwu]

ONS CHAPTER 138 FIRST IMPRESSIONS WOOO

SPOILERS! !!

- hrm. Kagami you fuck, why did you do that to Krul. She deserves better

- man, the slow acting poison did come up. But. Why

- tepes siblings flashback. Ouuugh they're so adorable

- okay, so Gurens (and Mahirus) goal now is to resurrect e v e r y o n e as humans. Yk what, if that includes Crowley, Chess and Horn I'm 100% with him.

- oooo the banter between Ferid and Gure(mahi) is kinda fun. Three incredibly fucked up people existing in the same space. Ferid being silly as always and Guren very no-nonsense. (Also the way Mahiru demanifested when Ferid stripped is so real. No one wants to see that)

- THE SIDE EYE FROM ARUKANU IS SO REAL I legit burst out laughing at that.

- having Arukanu comes with a free magical girl transformation! Slay i guess (tho Ferid's new outfit is kinda mid. I guess it's supposed to resemble his clothes from when he was 16 but it just doesn't look that good imo)

- I think those are four sinful keys? Are they gonna battle Rigr for the rest?

- CROWLEY!!! CHESS!! HORN!! YIPPEEEEEE

- the way Crowley's just like "Hi! :D", Chess is like an overexcited sports commentator and Horn is just calm is so silly. Agshgnkefgkn chapter is an immediate 10/10 just bc of them. The sillies are sillying 💖🫶💖🫶💖🫶💖🫶🫶💖💖

- hhhhh Krul is still so beautiful <33 tho rightfully pissed about being dead sort of

Overall: really shitty that Krul is dead, the asspull is still aspulling but everyone was very silly so. Not bad. Hashtag Krul deserves better. Hashtag kill Ferid 2024 <3

[readychilledwine]

this is for baby daddy.

what are some other Liz-isms?

Oh 👉👈 This might be embarrassing 🫠

Baby daddy's answer below the cut

These first three may give away Lizzy's upbringing in a rural community in the States.

Lizzy's on the first really hot day of the year, "It's hotter than a fresh fucked fox in a forest fire."

Lizzy on the first really cold day of the year, "It's colder than a witch's tit in a steel bra."

Lizzy when mosquitoes exist, "The mosquitoes are so big this year they could fuck a turkey flat footed."

Lizzy when Sophia burps, "Nice."

Lizzy when we get sushi, evidently quoting a movie, "I'm not very hungry. So, I can just get one Mahi instead of the mahi-mahi?"

Lizzy when she sees any animal, "Can we keep it?"

Lizzy when she sees an attractive girl (general description) "Did you see her? Big booty. To your left. Leggings. White tennis shoes. Yeeeeeeaaaaaaah. See? I'm a good wing woman."

Lizzy when we used to drink, "I'm only going to have like one long island." (Has 4 or 5 and needs me to carry her to car and into the house and to bed)

Lizzy when we used to enjoy weed, "Where's our cat?" (Proceeds to cuddle all of our animals because "they need her.")

Also, Lizzy, when we used to get enjoy nature's finest plant, "I have some tea for you," (proceeds to zone out) "I'm gonna go read a book."

Lizzy anytime we do the deed, "Now cuddles or never again." (Like we aren't going to cuddle?)

Lizzy whenever it's gloomy outside, "Can we watch Twilight?"

Lizzy whenever someone gets hurt in a funny way on tv while hiding her face in my shoulder to hide that she's laughing. "I'm going to hell."

Lizzy when she's trying to be super sneaky about sneaking a kiss, "How do you pronounce that word again?" (Proceeds to get closer as I'm trying to teach her)

Lizzy whenever I ask her if she wants a nap, (proceeds to make puppy eyes) "Really?" (As if I'm not serious about her needing a nap.)

Lizzy when she needs water, "(my name), will you fill my hydration stations? Please?" (She drinks so much water now I'm surprised she hasn't turned into a fish.)

Last but not least, her newest one, "My moot hasn't posted in a few days. Do you think they're okay? Should I message them? Or should I let them have the space they need?"

[toa-ikari]

So Rahi are pretty messed up right. Multiple MU species eat meat, so there's a finite number of creatures being consumed for their meat, but there's (apparently) no reproduction for the MU inhabitants (we'll come back to this). So either after being consumed the Rahi either spend time regenerating their organic bits (neglecting the damage that would naturally occur to their mechanical bits during a fight or hunt), get rebuilt on the red star after being eaten (I'm sure the Kestora appreciate that), or the Makuta recycle.

But like, this doesn't make any sense, that's too many steps, all of those are. Especially the regeneration one (although that does have some of the body horror elements present in a surprising amount of Bionicle media.)

Let's circle back to reproduction for a second. So we know Rahi build nests, from Matau, and we also know that ussal crabs get bigger as they age. Both of these seem to imply that Rahi (at least) have some sort of mating cycle. Let's also consider that the Po-Matoran kept Mahi and Mukau (which I refuse to call Mata-Nui cows, they had a name before someone at Lego said "eww, cringe.") Think about how difficult it is to keep livestock, in a desert, while under siege from the god of destruction. They can't be keeping them around just for the meat, these Rahi are either being used as beasts of burden (honestly likely), or are also being kept for their milk. Which if you know what causes lactation you might get where I'm coming from here. Otherwise you just have a case of weird and bad worldbuilding: it wouldn't make sense for the Po-Matoran to keep Rahi just for meat when they could just as easily hunt it.

Now a point against me that I can easily think of is that the Toa Mahri thought it was strange and gross that creatures outside the MU laid eggs. It is however possible that Rahi just give live birth.

Love might not be cannon, but there's a decent amount of evidence that fucking nasty style is.

[marvel-potter-1d-korea]

My boards are finally over!!

Since your requests are open, I wanna read a Loki x Reader (you can use my name) fluff with the reader being protective of him going as far as to fight other for him both verbally and physically

(GIF not mine)

MINE

Pairing: Loki x reader, slight Sam x reader(platonic)

Warnings: Hitting, broken nose, swearing, angst, fluff, Loki(yes he's a warning)

Summary: Just reader being protective of Loki.

(A/N: I hope you like this Mahi. And i hope i di your request justice. We all love our favourite trickster.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*crack* The glass in your hand cracked but you could care less. You were busy staring daggers at the pretty blondie who was hanging off your boyfriend's arm. These were the moments where you wished you could also summon daggers by just flicking your wrists.

"At this rate you'll shatter the glass completely." Sam.

"Shut up. Who does she think she is? Just because she's blonde she thinks he'll fall for her? What an idiot." You scoff incredulous.

"He isn't making it easy either." You mumble. "I could just kill both of them i swear. That damned smirk of his."

"What? I couldn't quite here you." Sam chuckled.

"Oh shove off Wilson" you shook your head.

That's when you see it. She's leaning in to whisper something in his ear. "Oh fuck no."

You were furious. You slammed your glass on the counter and marched up to them. Oh you were gonna slap that damned smirk of his off his face. That asshole.

You pushed off the blondie and grabbed Loki by his collar and smashed your lips on his. Or kiss it off,ok. He reciprocated immediately, holding your waist and bringing you closer. You wrapped your arms around his neck and deepened this kiss. You finally pulled away for air and turned to the shocked blonde.

"This fine man right here is MY man. So i would appreciate it if you would back off. You don't want to see what happens otherwise. Trust me" you said with a sickeningly sweet smile.

But turns out she was as stupid as a blonde could be because she spoke up,"I don't believe you. I mean, how could a girl as pathetic as you could date a man like him. Just look at him, he's so fucking handsome and you're just.....you" she shrugged, smiling maliciously.

Loki was about to say something but you stopped him. "I got this" you assured him, before you turned around to face her.

Your eyes darkened. "I gave you one chance to back off. Should've taken it" you chuckled darkly and tilted your head. "Oh no." You heard Loki saying behind you.

You threw a punch directly to her nose. You heard a crack. Then you swiped your leg under hers to throw her off. Once she fell, you kicked her stomach and slapped her face once more, just for your own satisfaction.

"You bitch! How dare you!" she screeched.

"I had every right to do that. You touch my man and i gave you one chance to back off. You didn't. So i hit you. Simple" you shrugged.

She huffed and ran to the exit, clutching her nose.

"I didn't think it would go this far, honestly" Loki said, smiling slightly.

"She got what she deserved. No one can touch my man except me" you stated matter of factly.

"And Norns do i love you being so protective over me" he stated circling your waist and bringing you closer to him.

You closed the space between you and kissed him.

"Remind me to never piss her off."

"I HEARD THAT SAM."

Loki chuckled.

[myauditionfordrphil]

Ok I'mma vent this out at once and will try to not utter a word about this cursed night again. India deserved this cup, they really did. Because if there's been a team who performed the best and embodied the spirit and passion of cricket it's been India. They did their best from the very first game against Australia... Jaddu's wickets (especially Smith's), the top order collapse and King and Rahul's partnership winning us the game (also Rahul's 97). Then came Afghanistan and Bangladesh - Rohit's century, Virat in delhi (vs Naveen, their hug), Hardik's injury resulting in our dear Cheeku's bowling, KL refusing runs to complete Virat's century, Ro - Vi - Rah hug 🤌and ofc umpire not giving the wide. The Pakistan rivalry came into the tournament but our streak was saved when we defeated them 8 - 0. Then came the most dreaded match against New Zealand - Vi's missed century was definitely a sore spot but the revenge was completed. Shami being shami showing why you should not bench him with his fifer and Jaddu hitting the final runs to avenge Mahi Bhai. England and Sri Lanka were no match - they were destroyed by our balling - the only good thing was Gill's knock, Shreyas' century and ofc RohiRat hugs ✨. We made a Sri Lanka out of South Africa with the King getting a century on his b'day and destroyed Netherlands but the main part was Virat and Rohit taking wickets. Then came the semis against NZ and honestly the whole desiblr was scared as fuck bcz of our history but Revenge was taken... Kohli shattering all records and hitting his 50th century making us prouder than ever (anushka's kisses and bowing to the God Sachin will forever be remembered) and Shami's 7 wickets, like is there a way to stop Lalaji bcz I can't think of one (amd what's this 7 factor? 397 runs, all out at 327, won by 70 runs, shami taking 7 wickets ? tribute to Thala ig). But it all came down to this, we lost the finals... After all this we lost, 1.5 billion hearts are broken, the 12 year wait continues. But this tournament will never be forgotten, we laughed and we cried with our team and supported them at every step. We saw moments we'll never forget, we made memories seeing records being broken and our boys having the time of their lives, hugging and dancing on the field and being more excited for the mighty fielding medal than the actual match itself. So this tournament will forever be remembered. You'd expect me to say congratulations to Australia but no, they played well ofc but no team played cricket better than India... Just bcz this team didn't performed in one single match didn't mean that they didn't deserve to win this. Kohli gave all of his soul, Rohit made this team what it is and Shami gutted all his haters but sadly luck was not on our side. After winning all 10 matches our unbeaten streak got broken in the finals only. Yes I'm heartbroken to core but at the same time I'm bloody proud of our boys who gave everything they had, your heads should be held high. In my own delusional world India won this cup and not just team India but the whole country. In my mind we are the winners and the team got the prize for their blood, sweat and tears. You'll all be remembered forever as champions.

Bleed blue 🩵

[peachysunrize]

What Iranian food do you think Aemond would love? And what food would explode his delicate medieval stomach? 😁

YOU DID NOT HOLY SHIT LEMME GIVE YOU A KISS BABES THIS ASK IS DELICIOUS😩😩😩😩

What Aemond would love -> I think one of the dishes he would devour would be Khoresht Karafs, not many people’s favorite (I love it and would also devour the fuck out of it) because it’s a bit bitter but also sour so it would go absolutely AMAZING with his taste!

Another dish he would love is Tahchin, which btw I’m a master at cooking it. It’s a really really good food and it has rice & chicken & barberry! So the combination will NEVER fail and he’d love it!!! Because not only it tastes good, he’d love to cook it!

Who can say no to Ghorme Sabzi? Probably the most famous Iranian stew and IT WOULD BE AEMOND’S GUILTY PLEASURE BECAUSE HE PROBABLY HATED THE LOOKS OF IT AT FIRST BUT THEN FELL IN LOVE WITH IT!!!

He’d also indulge in Kebab from time to time🤭

What I’m sure would EXPLODE his medieval stomach, is Abgoosht (I LOVE THIS FOOD SFM) and it has lamb, chickpeas, white beans, onion, potatoes, and tomatoes, turmeric, and dried lime! Aemond would hate it because it’ll make his stomach BLOAT and his god complex would not tolerate him farting left and right—

Another dish that would have him crying is Ghalieh Mahi. It’s a southern dish with fish in a tamarind & herb sauce AND ITS SPICY!!!!! Nope he would lose his mind if he ever eats that — which btw is also another very VERY delicious dish but he’s tasteless af

[ronika-writes-stuff]

My thoughts on the current ipl points table that absolutely no one asked for :

(part-1)

1. They're the og champions...very chill, very fun vibes.

soo happy to see them on top. They really be feeling like royalty rn lol.

Also in the end, I'm just a girl 🎀💖 some I absolutely adore their jersey.

2. Yaar.... I know Hyderabad is a great team and everything but.... Do you guys have to go this hard?

Other teams come to play a match, this team comes to crack open your morale and bring you to your knees.

Baki teams khel rahi hai, Yeh log toh seedha gunda gardi kar rahe hai Yaar.

Watching Abhishek, our Indian player, a youngster, bat like that feels amazing tho.

3. Kolkata.... Man.

Gautam bhai aaye, and suddenly Sabka Chris Gayle bahar aagya.

I feel like sunil will take both purple and orange caps this year and gambhir bhai has already planned on picking the trophy this year so... Yea.

PS : once gautam bhai is done someone pls convince him to come as ICT's coach.

4. Chennai = 7 letters = thala for a reason.

They're doing great, but their recent performances makes me worried about what will happen to this team when Mahi Bhai retires.

If they don't start taking more responsibility now there's a good chance csk will crash land in the bottom next year. Hope thT doesn't happen tho.

5. LSG, you beauty....

They look like they are a weak team but they've defeated rcb, gt, pbks and...sabse importantly.... CSK.

But their next matches are quite tough too... So we'll see where they end up after 2 - 3 more matches.

The way kl Rahul hits sixes is just beautiful.

6. Mumbai.

I...... Have no idea what mysterious substance this management was on tbh.

If you want to remove someone from the captaincy, there's gotta be a better way to do that so the fans aren't offended and the player also isn't disrespected. Look how kohli left rcb's captaincy for example.

Then, if you wanted to look towards the future, Bumrah and Surya, both who have captained team India and have stayed with the franchise despite having so many opportunities to earn more if they leave should have been considered.

Or they could have just choosen Ishan. Just like csk and gt choose youngsters, Ishan could have been a good option too. Plus He's captained his team during u-19 in 2016.

But no. They choose Hardik.

Tbh, I feel so sorry for him cause in his mind, when MI offered him captaincy and called him back, he would have been happy to go back to his old team...like going back home.

But the sad truth is, MI management saw how successful he was in gt, winning in the first year and then reaching the finals in 2nd year....and it pissed them off that their player is doing well in some other team. So they brought him back.

Despite so much backlash from fans, so much hatred and trolling against Hardik, this shitty management never held one press conference to clear up misunderstandings and give answers to their fans honestly. Because they knew, if the truth comes out, they'll be on the receiving end of this hate.

Fuck them.

The only mistake Hardik did was leaving gt. But... Oh well.

(I ended up ranting lol.)

[fish-at-fish-fish-resort]

new mahi redesign for the warmer months. also new hair color !!!???!??! and i decided to properly log the piercings and tattoos on a fucking ref.