#Also purposefully very vague about what I'm doing lol

[s1llyfreakx3]

TW: manipulation, abusive relationship, grooming in the manipulation way

(also I think this counts as romanticising them, but still portrayed as negative just in the unreliable narrator way)

Self indulgent transgroomed scenario that AAAAAAAA /pos ;w;

I want to talk to someone friendly and nice. But then they would slowly start toeing boundaries. I might notice and ask them to stop, and they would apologise, maybe draw back a bit, but return to their previous behaviour within a few days. They'd keep gradually going further and further, but it's normal to often be uncomfortable in relationships, right? We'd be talking about something I like, I'd be stimming with happiness but then they'd suddenly say something uncomfortable, that'd make me fall silent. My hand would start shaking in that awkward, nervous way, and I wouldn't know what to say or how to react. So I'd just laugh nervously, or try and do whatever I thought they wanted me to do. It's my fault for not being good enough at socialising, that's the only reason why I'm feeling so uncomfortable and why there's so many ups and downs in how I feel around them. Whenever I did something wrong, made a mistake in how I should act around people, they'd point it out. I mean that's good, it's fair if some of my behaviours are weird or are making them feel uncomfortable. They'd point out stuff I knew were problems, like forgetting to answer messages or rambling about a boring topic for too long. But they'd also tell me stuff I didn't realise were so weird and uncomfortable for others. And soon I'd realise that it's normal to do whatever they want, and that I'm a bad person if I try making a scene about something. I've always had problems with being too dramatic, and I can't let this happen here. I'd just go along with whatever they said, even if it would have been unthinkable to me just a couple months ago.

[ambrossart]

Hi hello i absolutely love paper man best it fanfiction I've ever read. i just so happened to reread again and i have a couple of questions. they might be dumb but im curious!!

when evie burns herself with the glue gun and patrick wants to see it. can you explain why? is it because he wants to see her in pain or if he doesnt feel pain himself and hes interested by the idea of feeling something?

also i think it's funny how victors saw eves bright yellow panties and then she wears the yellow dress. was that on purpose or a coincidence?

last question im rambling sorry, can you explain why Patrick was so void of emotion when talking to evie about matin? like yeah he's usually very void and vague but it was reallyy emotionless well until he asks her if he should handle him lol. i just want to know what he was feeling and when he tells Evie something along the lines of its only her and him in the whole school. does he think evies real?

can't wait for more never stop being you ❤️

1) I'd say it's a bit of both, actually. Considering what we already know about Patrick, I think it's pretty safe to assume he derives some pleasure in seeing/inflicting physical pain on others. But I also think there's an element of curiosity to it. Innocent curiosity. It's hard to expand on that further without spoiling things, but Season 2 is all about Patrick. You'll be learning a lot about him then. Probably way more than you want to know.

2) You know, there are several yellow objects in the story. Evelyn's spirit week dress. The Band-Aid she put on Henry's cheek. Her pink-and-yellow quilt. And yes, even the panties she was wearing that night. When I think of Evelyn, that's the color that comes to mind, so... yeah, I purposefully made a lot of things yellow, especially if they're associated with Evelyn.

3) I assume you're talking about the scene in the science lab after Evelyn's assault? Well, there's a couple things at play here:

Patrick is incapable of empathy. If feelings were colors, this boy would be colorblind. He genuinely cannot grasp the full depth of Evelyn's suffering. He can’t imagine what she went through. He can't relate to what she went through. None of that is getting through to him. None of it.

Patrick has a very nonchalant attitude toward sexual assault and sex in general, if we're being totally honest. He's assaulted his fair share of women in the past, including Evelyn, and he's probably been assaulted himself a few times, especially in his youth. Patrick doesn't mind, though. It's just sex, after all. Sometimes it gets a little violent. 🤷🏻‍♀️

In Patrick's eyes, Evelyn got off easy with Martin, a known rapist, which is why he basically says, "Hey, at least you weren't raped, right?" It's not a very kind thing to say, but it's true. It could've been a lot worse.

And if it had turned out worse, I think Patrick’s response would be a lot different. It would still come from a very selfish place, but it would be different: stronger and more severe.

Setting all of that aside, I wouldn't say Patrick was entirely devoid of emotion. Evelyn's situation definitely affected him, just not in the way it would affect most people.

Patrick is wired differently. I think that's the simplest way to put it.

4) As for your last question, well… yeah, I'm not gonna answer that. I can’t answer that. I do love that line, though. I think it says a lot about Patrick and his feelings toward Evelyn. The boy’s intense, like scary intense.

Thank you so much for reading! 💖

[hopefull-mindset]

Hi I'm the anon who sent the "rambling" ask about Nagito from like 2 weeks ago. I forgot to check for a response lol.

I wanted to elaborate on what I said about Nagito's backstory bc it was vague and I have Thoughts.

I actually don't think his casual attitude towards his past makes it harder to take seriously (if anything I think that adds to the tragedy of it). I was mostly just referring to the specific things that happen. One of my gripes about DR is that I feel like some characters have unnecessarily dark/tragic backstorys. Either bc I feel like they don't really need a dark past at all (eg Akane), or it's excessive to the point of being ridiculous.

I know Nagito's backstory is supposed to unbelievable to show how extreme his luck is, and that DR as a whole isn't exactly grounded in reality, but I feel like it would hit harder if it was just a little more believable.

Like, maybe his parents die in a car crash instead of a plane crash (or just make it a normal plane crash without the convoluted "the plane gets hijacked but then the hijackers get hit by a meteor but that also kills his parents"). The cancer is fine, but the dementia is overkill. Then there's the kidnapping thing which like. I find it hard to believe that the killer would just let him go after not getting what they wanted. It'd make more sense for him to have escaped on his own. Or we could just get rid of that entirely. If you want to drive home the fact that he has no family, just have him end up in some shitty orphanage or something.

Which brings me to my next point. It's implied that Nagito just lived alone after his parents died. But I find it hard to believe that an elementary school-aged kid could live by himself and have full control over his own finances. It'd make more sense if he ended up in some kind of foster care (or maybe just on the streets). I also think him being an orphan who doesn't get adopted/gets bounced around between foster homes would be fitting with his perceived worthlessness and desire to be loved, perhaps even more so than him being totally isolated.

Ok I think I covered everything (as far as canon events go at least). Sorry this turned into an essay lol.

Oh hello anon! Thank you for clarifying, I was a little perplexed as to how I should’ve responded to your ask. I don’t have much to really say about the events themselves, but I’ll try to add my two cents.

I do agree that it makes it sadder how casual he talks about it, I think I was more talking in behalf of the people that didn’t rethink his words when he claimed he was lying because of how unserious it felt with the music playing behind it. It’s so normal for him to experience these things that his layer back attitude is very unnerving for the normal person, which is utterly tragic.

I do see what you mean about not need every character to have some tragic messed up backstory, especially when it has no actual impact in the story itself. It’s good to expand a character through side content, but it gets too much. I think it works in favor for the sdr2 cast considering it shows that all of them have the potential to turn to despair due to their past experiences, and how Hope’s Peak doesn’t actually care for the students themselves and their own feelings towards their talents, but canon kicks itself in the crotch by never expanding more with these backstories in the actual storyline and how dr3 was handled ughh.

When it come to Komaeda’s backstory however, I do think it works for him when it comes to the absurdist writing because his entire existence is drenched in the absurdism danganronpa is known for. It would probably hit harder if Komaeda was more realistic and I understand that, but ultimately that’s not what Komaeda is. He is purposefully hard to relate to and hard to believe, only with real effort you can find yourself in him, and he even rejects that effort itself. Komaeda cannot survive in a series that isn’t Danganronpa because he is Danganronpa, a clunky mess that somehow works in its accidental genius.

I sound absurd myself, but when it comes to Komaeda you can only rely on your own suspense of disbelief to sympathize with him. Sorry for being a bummer to your roll because your criticisms are not at all wrong, I just personally don’t find it to be a problem myself.

About the killer and orphan thing, I think I could try to give some insight on them? Here’s one thing you forgot: he’s canonically implied to be a rich kid. Even if he isn’t thrown into situations like being on the streets or the foster care system, he still had other family members to be dropped onto, his status would still give him privileges like a nanny to watch over him, etc.

The killer, while I did find strange that he decided not to kill the rich kid after all, he definitely did target him because he was from a wealthy family. So what could that mean? Well obviously we could go for the heartbreaking answer of nobody in the extended family wanted to help him because of his problematic luck or annoyance of his existence, we could go for another that none of them were alive to actually get anything out of him since it took place in middle school, and he did say that his luck took direct action against him right before he was eventually taken into Hope’s Peak academy because of his lack of family left. It depends on when during middle school this happened.

So I guess there wasn’t any real consequence to leaving this lonely wealthy child on his own since there’s nothing nobody could actually do to lead back to them or would care enough to do anything. Upsetting I know, the unfortunate irony of being thrown away like trash for Komaeda is… well anyway I think the point of this event was to drive in Komaeda’s feeling of being unwanted, even by the worst of the worst of society, at least that’s what I think of it.

The only thing I question is how Komaeda himself personally describes his good fortune after what happened to his parents. What would a kid in elementary really need immense wealth and freedom for??? I find myself perplexed by his choice of words because it implies a lot. I know we could go the route of “his parents were terrible” when it comes to the freedom part, but I think there’s a better answer to this.

This is an example of Komaeda justifying what happened to fit a narrative he’s formed because of, most likely, what society/the people around him has fed him and what he’s chosen to believe. I’ve already mentioned this before, but his mentality reflects specific societal beliefs to an exaggerated point because his life is exaggerated. Where any of these came from to make Komaeda think this: who freaking knows.

Sorry if this isn’t exactly what you were expecting, and I wish I could add more. I hope this was satisfying enough.

[squarebracketsmileyface]

BE SAPPY AND WEIRD ABOUT YOUR PROJECT!!! YOU DO DESERVE A HAPPY ENDING!!! AND YOU DESERVE TO TALK ABOUT THE WAYS YOU REALIZED THAT YOU DESERVE IT!!! ARRRARARA YOURE MY FRIEND AND I LOVE SEEING MY FRIENDS HAPPY

I will CRY /threat

Also I took this as an excuse to ramble, because actually thinking about it, damn this fic has done a lot for me. Like this is dramatic as shit but genuinely writing this fic has changed my life in such a good way. You don't have to read all this lol, it's a mess and weird and ended up extremely long, it was just nice to put it down in writing cos it's been meandering around in my head for a while but I haven't spent much time thinking about it in a coherent way and it was nice to get all my ducks in a row with it all

God though, this fic has helped me figure out so many things, and it's so important to me. Like half of what it helped me figure out isn't even things I could put into words properly, like I can't bullet point most of those things, they're just weird emotional things that are just there.

Anyway, back to my dramatic ass "this fic changed my life." Like just for one I've made friends because of it which is amazing, but also like, just the things this fic has helped me process and understand? Like idk they feel like they shouldn't mean that much and should be fairly inconsequential, but they just aren't? Like the whole "hey maybe I can allow Lark to have a happy ending in an "everybody lives" au of this AU" kinda came about at the same time as I started to really settle mentally into my relationship with my boyfriend and stopped feeling that vague threatening feeling of "this is going to hurt like a bitch when something goes disastrously wrong and ruins our relationship, whether platonic or queerplatonic, forever". Like I started really properly feeling and believing "hey maybe it won't go disastrously wrong and he is just a very lovely guy who absolutely won't turn around and be evil and purposefully hurt me at some later date" instead at around the same time I was like "hey maybe Lark's relationship with Tim wouldn't fall all the way the fuck apart and maybe she'd actually get to raise her kid and be a good mum with a good partner and live a nice life where everything would turn out fine in the end."

And also like, another thing this fic helped me figure out a bit is like, just people mentioning how much the way I write Jay makes them think he'd have bpd in this au? Like I think you were one of the first people to mention that and honestly it's put so many things in perspective for me about just, the way my brain works that I didn't have an explanation for before? Or I did, I tried to explain it with Autism but it didn't quite fit perfectly. And like, I still don't know if I have bpd and I probably won't for a long while, but I write all my characters as me in some way, and Jay especially started out as basically just a self insert wearing a terrible wig and those mustache glasses. But from what I've looked into about bpd now it does seem to fit pretty well, especially the parts people have talked about with like, "very intense but unstable relationships with others"? Thankfully I'm better about that now than I was a few years ago? Tho sometimes I still get scared I'm about to become obsessed with my boyfriend in that way that ruins my relationships with people 💀💀 And the thing with like acting really impulsively? Though I've gotten better at stamping down every rage fuelled "hey you should throw this water bottle at that person's broken arm because they hurt you" type impulse since I was a kid. I now know how not to just lash out and harm people way more than they've hurt me, even when it's all my brain can think to do. So like?

Sorry anyway 💀💀💀 that was such a weird ramble to go on. But speaking of obsessions that ruin relationships

I haven't really talked about it much on here, but when I was 16 I was in a sort of similar place to Jay with Alex, not the friends with benefits bit (though yeah there were a few Very Interesting sexual things going on there that I'm definitely not gonna talk about in anything but the broadest strokes 💀) but definitely the "I'm going to string you along because I like you back but you like me way more than I like you and i dont know how to deal with you, so ill have my fun then ignore you the rest of the time," kinda stuff. And like, I was still pretty angry about that when I started writing this fic and it actually kinda helped me feel less angry at the guy? Because at first Alex was at least loosely based on him and the feelings I had about all that (and then later on Alex became a bit more Also Based On Me like Jay is lol). Like, in my case it was apparently a lot more that guys fault than it ended up being with Jay and Alex? I just kinda assumed it was entirely my fault for not texting him first enough cos I was terrified of annoying him by acting as clingy as I felt 💀 but apparently my guy was just actually a little shitty? (again, not gonna go into that here, it's a mess 💀), but like, for at least some of the less Actually Pretty Fucked Up things he did I kinda got to understand where he was coming from through thinking about Jay and Alex and thinking about Alex's pov. Like, he wasn't trying to be cruel, he just didn't like me as much as I liked him. I got obsessed with him and he was just there for some casual sexting and flirting etc lol

But like, yeah. This fic is so important to me, especially Jay and Tim's relationship. I haven't been thinking about that quite as much recently because I've been focussing on If It Ain't Broken and Jaylex, and I might not even get to focus on it in exactly the way I want to for the next Jam fics in the series, but like. Jay's hang ups over Alex and feeling scared that "what if Tim is just the same" is loosely something I've struggled with too. I'm better with it now than I was a year ago, but even so, every now and again not getting a reply to a message pretty much straight away can send me careening down "oh my god I've annoyed him, oh my god he's not going to talk to me for two weeks straight" street lol. Plus other weird hang ups that Jay most certainly doesn't have 💀

My boyfriend puts up with so much, he's wonderful, ily Vin if you're reading this.

Hell, even the way Jay and Alex end up leaving things at the very end of If It Ain't Broken is actually kinda similar to how stuff ended with me and my guy, I didn't even think about that till now. Alex is just gonna go off with Amy out of the blue and Jay isn't going to know what to do, even though he sort of saw it coming? Like he could kinda tell something was up but he doesn't want to accept it because like "oh well it's probably nothing maybe Alex is just busy. And my guy just texted me one day to say "How do you feel about me? Hmm? Oh yeah? Cool I no longer like you, actually, yeah sorry, I know you think you're in love but. Yeah I've been talking to someone else for a couple weeks now so I think this is the end of our little thing. Bye" lmao. I didn't even realise I've planned the Jaylex 'break up' to parallel that 'break up' 💀 tho honestly Jaylex's 'break up' will probably be slightly nicer on them coa Alex is going to move uni's and they're not going to see each other. So no panic attacks on sight for those two, lucky fucks.

[implausiblyjosh]

While I'm waiting for certain Wikipedia things to calm down, I'll repost a cohost post of this little "roundup" of things I saw on Wikipedia last month-ish. Whoever it was that said you should look at drama surrounding wikipedia's admin noticeboard if you wanna get the rush of seeing convoluted drama that doesn't really matter… you were really onto something.

Time has passed, so here are some incidents I’ve found fascinating. Talking as vague as possible so spots are not blown up.

First: weirdness around BYU Wikipedia editors. There are people at BYU paid to edit Wikipedia, and of course there are conflicts of interest at play because, of course, they will edit pages about Mormonism and do apologetics about Mormonism. As far as I can tell, it's part of the paid job to get students to edit in topics about Mormonism, and it seems like it also is about getting paid to edit in topics about Mormonism. It’s pretty cut and dry here, at least to me, that something’s gotta be done about these editors. The position at BYU is inherently a big conflict of interest on it's face, and it’s even worse that one of the editors this current incident revolves around was against providing any statement that showed they worked for for BYU and were giving tips on how to get around Wikipedia Conflict of Interest policies to other BYU people/students.

I thought it was strange that this topic cannot seem to find a consensus on if there is a conflict of interest, let alone providing any path forward on what to be done about said conflict of interest, because it's been brought up repeatedly in my handful of months reading these posts/notices/whatever and it seems to be in-line with some changes that were made around Conflict of Interest policies and Scientology in the past. The big reveal of the true depth of the weirdness this time is that a majority of the people who have been pro “paid BYU editors making clearly conflict of interest edits on Mormonism related pages, no conflict of interest should be even acknowledged let alone dealt with” now and in the past have, themselves, not been open about their own ties to BYU. And they're being flippant about those connections now that they've been revealed.

I find that one fascinating because it should have been clear-cut from the start, to me. If this person is getting paid to edit Wikipedia by an organization (BYU) that is one of the many arms of a specific religion (Mormonism), they should be disclosing those conflicts of interest as bright as day at the very least. That they've pushed back on making those types of disclosures (until now, because they're about to get in trouble lol) while also teaching other people, seemingly students, how to get around conflict of interest policies shows they cannot be trusted. Now that it's been revealed that there's a bunch of people who have been muddying these waters intentionally and that these people have ties to BYU, who did not disclose those ties until damning evidence of the ties came up, it tells me that there definitely needs to be much larger action taken.

Second: some guy was warned/blocked/barred/restricted from making specific edits centered around a controversial event in some person’s life where they said something sexist. They’re now actively and purposefully getting around those restrictions because they think the controversy should be written about in such a way that makes it seem like no one thought the person said something sexist, and that no one thinks they've ever been sexist ever. Basically walking right up to the "only hysterical people could believe they said something sexist" line without crossing, and trying desperately to push consensus towards that line. Crucially, for what matters to wikipedia and the culture they attempt to cultivate, this person cannot be talked down and refuses to be talked down from this position. They've basically admitted they believe anyone who disagrees with them is wrong, and they will keep working at this until what they see are right is pushed through. They only consensus they will acknowledge is one where they are in the right. Despite the fact that this person is admitting to getting around blocks to push their point of view, it was like pulling teeth to get consensus on the idea that more should be done to keep this person from continuing this behavior.

I found this one fascinating because it very culture-war-y, and while there is new culture war bullshit going on, it seems like sometimes old culture war battles still go on forever. It was revealed at one point that this editor blogged extensively about how the person totally wasn't being sexist and it was all blown out of proportion when this event happened, and now almost 10 years later the guy is still at it.

Third: Guy has a history of being a generally good long-time editor, except for the last two or so years where they’ve just... lost it? Just being a big asshole. Constantly trying to tell people who disagree with them that they are breaking the rules, citing rules and policies at people like a fucking TTRPG rules lawyer, but also seemingly has a self-inflated grasp of the policies, they keep making weird changes around conspiracy theories and defending conspiracy theorists, and they keep trying to imply any disagreement with them is also just like government censorship by death squads.

That's all kinda run-of-the-mill online nonsense to me. The actual interesting thing to me is that, now that the consensus is that this person needs to be stopped, the person has pivoted suddenly to "actually, all this is causing me real-world, physical pain when you disagree with me when I'm clearly the only correct person here". All of a sudden decided to deploy this when the tide very clearly turned, and it's so silly to see how opportunistic it is.

Genuinely reading these has been so interesting to me. I've never wanted to edit Wikipedia less than I have in these past few months lmao.

[pyroexcape]

I already commented on the post but

"#bc they are my own and not canon. and i don’t want people to think i’m wildly misunderstanding the character#bc i more than understand and am also invested in the boundaries of canon. but i also like doing what i want#and deconstructing and reconstructing narrative and characterization#and i feel like people won’t know that but i also feel so silly putting a disclaimer over everything i draw of being like#‘oh this is my own thing actually’ LOL"

I relate to that so hard with soooo many of my stories. Like I brought up my own version of The Boys™ but genuinely I feel this with so many of my interests. Like, Undertale most of them because it genuinely has a super deep complex story a lot of people tend to misunderstand or not care about or not get the themes, and I love talking about The Themes and How Cool The Game Is and Common Misconceptions

Then I make a fanfiction that's like. Nothing like canon even a little bit. Genuine it is sometimes the fucking opposite of the Point Of The Game and like if someone ever pointed that out to me I would shake them and go I KNOW I KNOW I CARE ABOUT IT WAY MORE THAN YOU DO LET ME EXPLAIN IN DETAIL JUST DON'T INSULT ME OVER IT I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING

YEAA U GET IT HAHA! i don’t feel that way about every series bc i like to think im pretty decent with Media Literacy and like to respect authors wishes whatnot but like.. in particular stuff that’s both extremely oversaturated to the public and/or purposefully vague enough in either character or plot so it has room for exploration (like pokemon and undertale) by its Very Nature people are gonna take it and run with it! that’s why so many of those undertale aus got crazy popular, people just like pondering the “what ifs” and i think that’s wonderful. on the other side i know how frustrating as it is to see people obviously misunderstand smth in a piece of work you hold dear but in the end i don’t think it’s very productive to be mad about esp if you don’t have Ownership over that work. for better or for worse putting things out there for an audience people will always engage with it differently and it’s fine tbh. in the end if u aren’t hurting anyone then who cares!

ON A SIDE NOTE thank u for the extremely nice tags and comments 😭😭 it’s smth that i get so easily self conscious about even if i know it doesn’t really matter but its always so kind to hear that you enjoy my stuff and can relate to my plights haha

[invinciblerodent]

Hi, lowkey obsessed with your tavs (and a durge when I get to know her, I assume)

Did you create/pick them specifically with romances in mind or did it shuffle itself successfully?

Aww, thank you, that feels so nice to hear! ❤️❤️❤️

Kind of both, actually! It's kinda what I've been doing since my Dragon Age days, lol: for first runs of a certain game, I ofc just let it happen (make a vague character whose personality unfolds as the story goes, romance whoever I feel they'd fall for, reverse-engineer how that works out for them), but once I know the main story and the characters, I... generally like to pick an LI, then pick a trait or theme of their story/arc that interests me, choose an angle from which to approach that theme, and make a person whose story centers around it in a different way, but who I think would have their own arc, but would... understand, and eventually, naturally fall for the character based on things they have in common.

Like, if you'll allow me to rant a little... picking a cleric, and Arvid's whole deal and personality playing off Gale's themes of devotion and divinity so nicely was a complete accident lol. But my second run, I went into building Iona in a pretty conscious manner, after having purposefully decided that I want to do Astarion's romance, and that I wanted the character I make for him to be a highly charismatic person (who would see through him, and act primarily out of their own self-interest themselves), but also someone who would be able relate to him more and more as he reveals details of his story and past to them.

At first I just knew that she'd be an elf (because of the long lifespan, and because both of them only needing to rest 4 hours gives them lots of one-on-one time). Then I decided on a sorcerer to make her able to relate to him in their inability to deny their nature (sorcery is a living thing that yearns to be used, it's a little like vampiric hunger if you squint), decided to make her someone who was, like him, trapped/denied self-expression for a long time because of that nature (vampire spawn vs. person with inborn magic forced to hide it), and the rest (her being a compulsive liar who yearns to tell the truth, her having pretended to be someone she isn't for so long that she struggles to let the masks go, her repressing her feelings and being prone to deflecting and saying what others want to hear, all of that) sort of unfolded as I thought more about her, and the kind of story I wanted hers/theirs to be. And that's... kind of the same general process I follow with all of them.

I know it's kind of silly, and that I'm overthinking a lot of things, but I've always found character creation to be a lot of fun, and playing through a story as a little guy (gn) who has their own headful of issues to sort out like all the others has always been my absolute favorite part of playing RPGs. It's like writing the parts of stories i enjoy thinking about the most (characters and their relationships), but all the worldbuilding and plot-writing has already been done for me by someone much better at it than I am, lol.

I honestly never think that someone is reading through my mini-rants about my OCs, but I'm very, very happy that you like them!! The Durge run is going to be emotionally rough as hell!!!!

[dearweirdme]

https://www.tumblr.com/dearweirdme/739076576711458816/do-you-think-tn-had-anything-to-do-with-contracts?source=share

What is still baffling for me is how there is not a single shot from those videos and photos in Paris of Tn together the way how it was so clear when it was just Tae and his manager. Even when they were about to go inside the car, Tae looked momentarily at the camera, but he looked so different, like he has a moustache or something. Also why was the video of that fan initially was so blurry then later on she released the HD version. I guess they just left enough room for doubt so that fans won't get too disappointed or something. I guess that PR was mostly for Jn since before Cannes, her show was already receiving so many negative reviews, so I agree with you. I just haven't seen a PR like this before, so I'm not sure about Tae's bearding, but if we think about it, he was about to enter the military, so I guess it was necessary for that reason. What's even weirder is how involved JTBC was from the Paris walk down to the break-up news. Do you think they're behind this considering their beef with Hybe? Oh that Tn fiasco will remain as Kpop's biggest mystery. Nothing can top that. lol

Hi anon!

I think it’s purposefully vague images and a purposefully clear images of him and his manager. The shots of them together will be the ones that will keep on circulating around fandom for years to come. The shot of him and his manager were only important for the moment the Paris shots dropped. Those will not be going around much, except amongst the few Taennies that have survived the bua.

Having the Taennie shots vague is a way to keep people still debating whether it was them. At first that was for the purpose of keeping attention, in the long run it will be the thing that makes people question whether it was actually true.

I know very little about JTBC to be honest.

[ratwars]

Sorry to bother you with Laito again BUT the more I read about him the more I think that if Yui was even a little bit less (and I hate the fact that I have to use this word to describe her) submissive he wouldn’t get anywhere near close her? Idk I thought about his whole obsession with purity and came to the conclusion that if Yui wasn’t such a stereotypical otome protagonist he would be scared of her? It could be a reach or it could be nothing new but I’ve been thinking about it :3 have a good day (or night since it’s currently 12:00 am here) <333

I'm not even apologizing for the length of this because at this point you have to know what you are doing sending me dialovers asks 💜🙏

Nono you have a point actually. Also I would argue with this series you don't need to tread so lightly on using descriptors for characters like submissive. The game purposefully has heavy bdsm themes, for better or worse, and sometimes it is only for aesthetic and sometimes it is very much a part of the route. Your status bars that your choices effect, and that effect your endings in game, are literally labeled S and M for sadism and masochism. High Sadism gets you the Manservant end (usually framed as a bad end, usually tragic in someway but often more so for the LI, if you don't like the LI you might not hate it though lol), High Masochism gets you the Vampire end (arguably the good ending for both LI and Yui) and having equal stats in both gives you the Brute end (Bad end. Often involving major character death. Typtical otome "you tried to play both sides so now you get to suffer" stuff lol).

Yui is often very submissive in her actions (and faces negative consequences in some routes in particular if she isnt), but that doesn't mean she isn't strong. The situation she is in is terrifying, and she isn't in it by her choice, but her strength, intelligence, and faith is what helps her survive. So I wouldn't look at calling her submissive as a bad/negative thing, her behavior being submissive isn't a negative in this setting. Some ppl hate on her character for it (and think she should have had more attitude or been more aggressive), but I disagree with those ppl. I adore Yui and she is a hell of a woman 😤 and she is who she needs to be in the setting she was written in and does a great job. Not everyone is some super aggressive fighter who acts first and asks questions later, and she canonically is a pacifist so I think it is cool there is a place for her in the story to consistently stick to that belief (and have it yield a good ending for her) despite being treated as prey from the beginning and onward by violent Do-S vamps. Plus there is a reason Karlheinz picked her to put her specifically in the household.

In later games/sequels you see it even more especially in certain route she is at that point *choosing* to be submissive, and it has no bearing on her strength, intelligence, or importance (nor should it). (One of my faves, Carla, actually often reminders her in his sequels that she now can and should ask for more and be more direct with her wants and needs, and that he would never shame her for it)

So the set up for dialovers (which you may have read up on already) involves this whole concept of sacrificial brides and "the awakening" (a sacrificial bride becoming a vampire) the more complicated stuff with Karlheinz' Adam & Eve experiment doesn't really matter here for this convo, because no one is aware of what he is trying to cause/pull until later on anyways.

Yui is *special* (because she is our heroine, right, so per the story she needs to be) but also because of certain qualities of her blood that are spoilers so I will leave this vague since idk what all you have read yet. Her upbringing is unique (raised by the church, pretty secluded from things though it is for *a reason*), however she is very religious and very pure, except she is a giant masochist that isn't being *honest* about it initially (and in some routes like...well you can't actually pry it out of her but everyone knows lol).

However if you make the right choices she survives. In some routes she goes through the awakening (becoming a vampire) in other routes she doesn't but she always lives in the good endings and into the sequels.

There have been countless sacrificial brides before her. And all of them have died. By the brothers hands, either through violence, torture, or them drinking their blood till they die. You have to imagine there was a variety of personalities between all the women that had come before her, and also that not every brother was partial to every previous sacrificial bride. So we can say probably that there was no sacrificial bride that Laito found either 1. Worth his time as much or 2. Worth his focus to fully monopolize her from the other brothers. (Previous sacrificial brides were some what free game, the idea of letting only one brother drink from the bride starts with Yui actually because she demands it from the start in the prologue of the first game).

Now he has fooled around with other people outside the sacrificial bride stuff too as well from what I remember we were told him game, but he gets bored with people so I think we can assume these were flings not long term.

Sorry this is so long winded. But basically I agree with you in the sense that, if Yui wasn't how Yui is Laito wouldn't have been as interested, or maintianed his interest. I can def see that. If she still had that strong sense of purity in this scenario but with an opposite personality then yeah I can see that too. It might scare him/put him off, but he sure as hell isn't going to admit it to anyone. Probably just leave another brother to deal with her instead (and it is possible maybe that something similar happened with previous sacrificial brides, since they were all given to the Sakamaki's by the church, and these dudes are hundreds of years old).

OR he would have only been interested to a point (that point being that he breaks her, she dies, or if she was just a regular girl from night school a fling he fools with then abandons). His route involving him trying to get under her skin and break her or get her to yield isn't unique, other routes take similar journeys, but on top of what is going on with her heart/blood, I do agree that her submissive nature and attitude helps him stick around. The combination of the things that make her "her", her purity, her faith, her attitude, her secret masochism and her submissive nature, are what makes her a good fit for Laito in the end. But yeah she is an otome heroine, so she is written in each route a little bit more for the specific LI, not the other way around. But I do think that the combo of traits she has is both what lures him in, drives him to a challenge, and then causes him to not let go even though it clearly is causing him turmoil at various points as you can see through his monologues and how he is lashing out at her (though her blood/heart also have to do with this some still especially in the beginning).

Of course in these potential scenarios where Yui isn't who she is and Laito maybe ignores her (or kills her), he is going to continue to be the same old Laito right because no one is going to challenge his thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

[pipitwrites]

GIVE ME 💭🖊️😈🧠

💭 what is a headcanon you have about your work?

this is not really a headcanon but!! for little bright things, which was partially inspired by the film sabrina (1954), i was kind of dancing back and forth between the degree of, uh, homophobia extant in this alternate universe, and also dancing around the actual location (the film is primarily set in long island, new york) so i was purposefully vague. and i'm still not sure if they actually do become Legally Married or if the ring is more of a symbolic gesture of commitment -- so i guess it can be whatever you want it to be!!

🖊️ post a snippet from a current wip.

Alex is, despite his siblings’ claims to the contrary, not a Luddite. He’s paid his dues to the cult of Steve Job, tracks his morning run times on his phone, and lives and dies by Google Maps. He is slowly going insane.

“Take a left turn here, Alex,” Charles instructs.

Alex peers dubiously at the intersection. “Have we just come around in a circle?”

“Ah, yes,” Charles admits cheerfully. “I missed the turn last time but we are in the correct direction now!”

😈 is there anything you enjoy doing that you think your readers hate?

i don't know if hate is right as i don't know if anyone else has really noticed, but i'm personally very aware of it LOL... i'm a chicago manual of style devotee so i tend to write charles's rather than charles'.

🧠 what's an idea you have that you can't quite call a wip yet?

well. my costar horoscope today was quite inspiring SDFKLJLJG

art student charles putting out an ad for a model in the college paper so he can practice his figure drawing and his friend pierre texts him about the ad, "😏 saw you were looking for a model," and charles replies, "please, pierrot, be serious." and pierre is like, "i am! what, you don't want to draw me?" and charles pauses because he does, of course he does. he has books filled with random sketches of pierre from stolen moments… but… he doesn't know if he'll be to handle pierre actually sitting and modeling for him… stripped down for him….

and he doesn't answer pierre's text for the longest time until pierre is like "i'm sorry, we can forget that i said that, i didn't mean to make you uncomfortable" and charles is immediately like, "no, i want to draw you," because ultimately his desires win out. so pierre models for charles, and charles blushingly has to guide pierre, who is only in his boxers, into the poses that he wants. and pierre jokes like, "should i take it all off," and charles is blushing even harder like. "please..."

anyway i don't know enough about actual art sdlfkjljg

[transgender-scout]

Question about Volitation (or the writing process of it, I suppose)! It sounds like you've planned out some key pivot points in the story where the dominoes fall exactly where they feel they need to and their consequences seem inevitable and I'm curious how you go about nailing them down! When it comes to planning that sort of thing, character decisions + consequences, do you imagine the consequences first, and then work backwards from there, or do consequences fall into place as you go? Or maybe a mix of the two, or something different?

Haha good question!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m much more of an artist than an author. I only started writing because I wanted to make sure I keep the lore on my ocs in line. So please take everything I say with a grain of salt lol

I have the main points plotted, mostly in terms of what happens to the characters if that make sense?

It's usually kind of a toss up between "this is what I planned on happening the entire time >:)" and "WAIT WOULDN'T IT BE COOL IF-"

Sometimes I write out my thought processes through the character, going through their options mentally. If something bad needs to happen, I purposefully leave out them thinking of that option. A lot of the time, it’ll look like this:

I could maybe fly it. But I needed a running start. And I still had almost no practice flying. And I would have to land again, which I was also not good at. I groaned. It sounded easier but there was so much that could go wrong with it so fast. Getting spotted, losing more blood from the extertion of flying, passing out mid-air…

Torture by walking for five blocks it was.

But sometimes the process is like. I have an idea of what bad thing is going to happen and I make a vague outline of how that happens, completely ignore that, and kind of write as I go.

I've been working on and off on Volitation for... over a decade now, so I've had a lot of time to see which plot points work and which don't. There's really only one plot point from the very first draft which will never see the light of day that's still relevant to the story now.

idk haha I spend a lot of time daydreaming about my ocs and the stuff that happens to them. Sometimes it just falls into place and makes perfect sense somehow.

Not sure if any of that made sense but I’m happy to try again if it didn’t! Just shoot me another ask or something :33

[sarasa-cat]

random fannish cp77 nonsense

Now that time is supposedly more available & flexible for most of the 2nd half of this year, I am FINALLY getting really jazzed about Cyberpunk 2077 in general, including a few things from the (now long ago) 1.6 patch that reference Edgerunners (the amount of Adult Responsibilities in my life was a fucking nightmare from Aug 22 until late Spring of this year), and playing/spec'ing my characters (all my Vs) far more purposefully and strategically from the moment I first touch the character creation screens and onward. And mods-- obviously-- with a focus on VP.

Realizing a few more things after spending last night watching YouTube vids of all sorts of craftily spec'ed Vs doing their thing during missions.

When I initially played CP2077 on PS5, despite enjoying it SO MUCH and having way too much fun, my V was very much a blunt weapon who tried to be all strategy and tactics (because I love tactical play after engaging in slow reconnaissance), my build was very ad-hoc -- too much of a jack of all trades, master of none.

I think console play on normal difficulty made me care less about spec'ing in a purposeful manner. Most of that comes from not really wanting to read lots of text (lol) when playing a console game with tiny text that looks far better up close on PC but it also comes from console gaming being a more social act in my house -- thus gameplay becomes a bit more spontaneous and entertainment-focused -- plus all of that "first time through a complex game" syndrome while wanting to see and collect all the things.

But now? Now that I have actually taken time to make sense of different builds, and finally (lol, I'm slow) taking the time to learn the real differences between weapon types (facepalm) plus find out about equipment and weapons I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WERE IN THE GAME (monowire, the sandevistan OS, etc) --- oh the possibilities. Also, some of the other cyberware I was only vaguely aware of now intrigues.

Well, I want to re-spec my nomad V (and my corpo V) and accidentally at least one streetkid suddenly asked to come into existence (like I have the time, lol, well, ahahah, I need fun in my life and fun that provides creative fuel is even better).

I am still sorting out who gets what and how it will shape headcanon.

I sort of feel like, idk, that sense of after having a mild crush for a long while but then, suddenly, not only do the stars align but I fall head of heels, lol.

Also, I miss having and once again need to have a fandom obsession in my life. The past bunch of (too many) years weren't kind. I need to be back in the sort of Creativity-Exploding-Everywhere headspace that fandom gave me from 2007-2014.

And I'm making it so.

(also, with brand new custom-ordered laptop being overpowered and thus much better as my all around work machine, the gaming machine is now only a gaming machine and has been moved out of my office and is upstairs in the writing nook so it will be used FOR gaming and my office is now only for work, which is SO MUCH BETTER).

(fwiw, I'm still planning on returning to writing ff7 fanfic -- monsters headcanon -- and also have some DA meta in the works with a casual DA2 playthough happening yet again. plus random indie games and visual novels and other such queued up too.)

All I know is that fandom creativity begets OTHER creativity and I need that river of OTHER creativity to flow so prioritizing fandom once again is also, very much, a strategic decision in addition to being a good+fun decision. ;)

[stevieselfships]

intimate knowledge & gorgeous visage for stu and wade :>

intimate knowledge: what are some hidden features of your f/o that not many people are privy to? things like a secret birthmark, the fact that they are ambidextrous, the bump on their nose that is actually the result of breaking it as a child. do these small facts about them fascinate you? do the stories behind them make you swoon for them even more, if possible?

stu: he has a matching tattoo with billy (they did stick n pokes on each other when they were like. 14) on his forearm. these are inital tattoos, BL on stu and SM on billy. <- hc also stole from an artist, the link to the art is here. he has very faded scars on his knuckles and hands in general from knife fights with billy at like. 12. shoulder freckles from sun exposure :']]]] and very light ones across his nose. has thigh scars because he would get bored during the summer and selfharm??? and has ones on his chest for the same reason. scar in his scalp from running at the pool as a kid and he fell and busted his head open (found when he had a usually short haircut). he does actually have a nose bump from breaking his nose as a child, he fell out of a tree and landed on his face because he does not know how to fall properly. he's broken it a couple times after, one from a drunken fistfight with billy, the other from falling down the stairs in his house (he's most embarrassed of this one). dog bite scars on his arm from him riling up some dog because he thought it was funny and then it attacked him (some dog was like a pitbull named princess). he's a tiny tad colorblind

i love hearing stu's stories of things, it's really cute when he starts laughing while recalling the memories <3

wade: some of his scars are vaguely heart shaped. he had a tattoo for vanessa but it got all warped and distorted when was tortured by fransis. he has a few silver crowns on his back teeth, he even forgets why he has them. he has dysgeusia, he's lived with it for so long that he feels like it's not worth mentioning. doesn't want to admit it, but when he's out of combat situations (because of hyperfocus), he has audio processing issues, he cannot watch anything without subtitles. this also means he knows some show episodes (mostly golden girls) and some movies word for word

gorgeous visage: does your f/o keep photos of you in their wallet? or do they maybe have a locket of your hair? what about you? how much evidence do you keep of them in your day to day life?

stu: he does!!!! in his wallet, it's this cute polaroid he took of us while we were high and in his bed watching a movie :'] he keeps a few behind it, which is one of us brushing our teeth, and another of me sitting on the counter in his kitchen for our 3am cereal. he loves that one because i'm completely dressed in his clothes which are entirely too big on me because he like. a foot taller than me. he also owns a necklece that's a vial of my blood. we actually have matching ones but those are sacred to us so we rarely actually wear them

i have stolen so many of stu's clothes. i have some of his sweaters which i love to wear, and i have stolen some of his button ups. they give me gender euphoria and it's even better since it's my boyfriend's clothes!!! he even purposefully leaves things at my place so he can see me wear them. he's even mailed me his own clothes before lol. i have horror posters up in my room which reminds me of him a lot, he bought me a couple of them actually. and he's gotten me some of the stuffed animals i have. i put a little s charm on the choker i wear all the time too for him. i love keeping him around

wade: he has a folder on his phone of photos of me and photos we've taken together. he takes horrible photos of me btw, like the worst. they're always secret ones that i don't even know how he took? he has a photo of us favorited though and that of me kissing his cheek through his suit mask and he has his hand on his other cheek in surprise. it's a very cute photo! it's from one of the first times i met up with him after he got back from a little thing of his

i keep wade in my day to day life from the few hello kitty plushies i keep in my bed, i always think of him when i go to sleep at night or take a lil nap. i also stole one of his zip up jackets, it's big and comfy, it's a good dysphoria item for me

[hedgewyse]

15 Questions Tag

Tagged by @negrowhat

Are you named after anyone? nope.

When was the last time you cried? 2012 maybe? not for lack of trying but it just doesn't work. it's very noticeable how people don't take you seriously about extremely upsetting things when you are not crying commensurately, and so leave you to suffer alone. oh well. there are upsides too. probably.

Do you have kids? 1, we don't really talk, it's complicated

Do you use sarcasm a lot? I used to. this is a very sarcastic country. but I've fallen out with a bit now, I prefer to be annoyingly complimentary if I can

What’s the first thing you notice about people? their smell, assuming I'm within a few feet. good smells are definitely soap or nice hair product, or subtle perfume, new sweat. I find it difficult to tolerate people who constantly smell like stale food or old sweat because I can't shut it out and it overrides everything else going on in my brain.

What’s your eye color? it varies between brown, green, grey and blue because I like theming my lenses to my outfit

Scary movies or happy endings? happy endings, I don't do scary

Any special talents? I'm pretty much calm no matter what is happening. probably more of a trauma response than a talent, lol. but I like getting to comfort people and I'm also a control freak, so it works out fine.

Were you born? no, I was kicked out of heaven, obvs

What are your hobbies? working too much, going to tech meetups, reading fanfic, brunch with friends, watching choreo vids as if I'll one day learn them, working out at home because I'm too lazy to leave the house again

What do I wish my hobbies were? reading quietly in coffee shops (I might try this one if I ever live somewhere it isn't constantly cold), being in a dance practice group, having a gym buddy

Do you have any pets? not anymore. I won't get another cat until I settle in a country that isn't this one

What sports do you play/have you played? not anymore, but previously jujitsu and archery

How tall are you? 5'8" in my shoes

Favorite subject at school? I didn't make a habit of school, to be honest. sciences were cool for the times I was there

Dream job: you mean aside from comforting pretty idols when they're having a bad day? :D

doing it already, tbh. security for a multinational. yes, I am purposefully vague, no I will not elaborate

Tagging: anyone who read one of my fics :P

[trans-rights-adam-jensen]

1, 12, 15, 25 for Finch!

Long and mild? NSFW? Not really, like on a level of dick drawings in bathrooms kind of NSFW.

What’s the lie your character says most often?

Cop-out answer: "I'm not a people person" lol

A more interesting answer: "Don't worry about me."  Finch does very much want to be worried about; they want to be loved and missed and thought of.

What’s something that makes them laugh every single time? Be specific!

Ok, context: so at some point while Jensen was out on a mission, he sent Finch a picture of some spilled fast food on the sidewalk, like a foil-wrapped half eaten burrito, that looked vaguely phallic-shaped and captioned it "found your dick lol".  Finch replied with "Oh shit that's where I dropped it.  Grab it for me, will you?" as a joke.  

Jensen, in the most annoying older brother way possible, literally brought it back with him in a plastic bag and tossed it into Finley's lap when he got back home, prompting them to screech at the ridiculousness and also vague grossness of even sealed food garbage.  

Since then, any time any of them get foil-wrapped food, Jensen will crunch it up into a dick shape and hand it to Finch.  Without fail, they end up on the floor wheezing.  

Jensen's foil sculpting has slowly become better to the point that he will occasionally take  absurd artistic liberties, which only makes Finley laugh even harder.  

What’s the most obvious difference between their behavior at home, at work, at school, with friends, and when they’re alone?

So in contrast to everyone's favorite Secret-Self-Loathing trope, Finch is a lot gentler to themselves when they're alone.  They self-deprecate less, they don't police their own behavior, they actually take fairly good care of themselves.  

Finch's "jobs" during and post WRH is.  Complicated, so I'll just stick with generally "in public" around people they don't consider friends.  Finley doesn't especially seem to give a shit about strangers; they ignore them for the most part, but internally, their self-image and general demeanor are harshly critical, for a myriad of reasons.  While after leaving UAAE their mental health improves drastically, they are still not friendly and will default to being kind of mean if they feel like someone's bugging them purposefully, or does something disagreeable. 

They also struggle very much with being looked at: a few times in WRH it's mentioned that they were uncomfortable with eyes on them.  Even though they aren't making eye *contact*, they still hate being stared at, and it's extremely draining.  If they're at the store and nobody is paying attention to them, they can navigate being around strangers with just "typical" levels of extra spoon/energy drain, but if they're Looked At as in for interviews, introductions, stopped by passersby, then they rapidly tire and may stim more dramatically, sometimes with their full body or close to it.  The scene where Jensen thanks them for finding the hellebore in his shoulder, and the fight at Sardonyx kind of capture this, though Finch is especially aggravated in the latter given the literal physical threat.

Among friends: Finch is more considerate with their favorite people, and eventually they get to a point where they feel they can joke with Malik and Pritchard, but they're not often openly affectionate with them; they show closeness via references and CONSTANT jokes. 

Jensen, and eventually a little bit Rey, recieve a very rare degree of trust and affection from Finley.  Those two are the only people Finch will really let hug them, or that they themselves will hug--excepting if they feel they need to reach out to a distressed friend.  Finch is extremely relaxed around Jensen in particular, similar to how they behave when alone.  

What subject / topic do they know a lot about that’s completely useless to the direct plot?

Oh boy!  This is a fun question.  Finch got really, really into color hex codes after discovering them in a middle school art class.  Do not ask them what color something is unless you are prepared for a DEEP DIVE.  They also like sewing and computerized weaving and knitting machines--and by extension can tell you Too Much about a particular piece of fabric.  (it is not plot relevant, as specified, so I have not researched these, please don't ask me about them, I do not know SHIT lmfao)

[mlchaelwheeler]

I’m so sick of that twitter ‘leaker.’ I know that she has been right about some things, but she acts incredibly smug, as though she knows everything that’s going to happen when she clearly doesn’t. She said that she gets her leaks from stand ins, doubles, and extras who have been right in the past, but you can’t get a full picture on what’s going to happen just from some doubles or extras hahaha, like when someone asked if Will is going to be vecnad she basically replied with something along the lines of no and I don’t care (I don’t believe it lol she can’t know everything). I do like to get spoilers, but the leaker that I go to (on reddit) isn’t biased at all and is super trustworthy bc he’s been right about everything in the past. He had the same spoiler about the bath, but he didn’t say anything about Mike confessing his love to El in his monologue during that scene, while the other leaker did, and I lowkey think she made it up lol…The redditor basically confirmed that while the tweeter isn’t purposefully lying and has been right about a few things, that she has been wrong about some things in the past bc she’s too gullible and just blindly believes sources. I also think she just posts what she wants to hear or the things she likes the sound of, if she actually was sent a very verifiable byler leak or leak about will, she’d either discredit it or just not post it. I’ve noticed too that when people ask her specific questions about the characters or ships she likes, she gives specific answers, but if people ask about anything to do with Will or Mike or any character she dislikes she gives the most vague answers, the same with some of the supernatural plots as well. like someone asked a question about a plot that has been theorized about and she goes ‘i guess so idk’. I think my problem is that people still see her as a reliable source. Even though some of her leaks have been correct in the past, her obvious dislike for certain characters and storylines color how she interprets things.

You said everything I'm thinking!! In light of the recent freak out on the byler tag, I'm just gonna leave this here lol <3