#Americans Vs Brits

[theabigailthorn]

British producers be like: THEM: "We love this! Let us put our heads together and get back to you early next week!" SIX MONTHS LATER UNPAID INTERN FOR THAT COMPANY: "Everyone you spoke to has been sacked, we hate you fuck off."

American producers be like:

THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON YOU'VE EVER MET: Hey kiddo do you wanna meet The Rock? Do you wanna meet Margot Robbie? Do you want to fuck my wife? I can't give you a job but gosh darn it you've got moxxy, let me put you in touch with Doug Bigcheese, the biggest producer in Hollywood! DOUG BIGCHEESE, EMAILING YOU BACK WITHIN 20 MINUTES: Hey kiddo, that guy said you're awesome! Lemme ask round town and in the meantime you can live in my house borrow my car and by the way have you met my wife?!

[mrs-jamesbbarnes]

The way they pronounce Honoria in TVD <<< the way they pronounce Honoria in Julia Quinn novels

[ofpd]

you know im not really seeing a common theme

[kyouka-supremacy]

/

[shisogelee]

i want to visit latam so fucking bad.... my coworkers who are based in mexico and equadors are honestly thee nicest funniest vibiest people

[bang-bang-gang]

every time i've ever made posts here dunking on americans it's gotten reblogged by americans clearly not realising i'm dunking on americans and i've felt so bad about it every time that i didn't want to point it out

[braxix]

Writing

Found out that even though I am American, from the USA, I spell a lot of words like the British.

Axe, cataloguing, favourite, realise, defence, behaviour, apologise, cancelled, catalogue, etc.

I don't do colour, but a surprising amount of my spelling has been Brough to light as British while I've been working on a book. It's silly. It's odd. It's... kind of distressing.

[1995lahaine]

WHO WOULD WIN:

‘hey kids spelling is fun’ vs ‘qanon created a legitimate scene but it was just some bloke in the philippines’

[livingfictionsystem]

I know people think the Brits are throwing workplace shade with "Regards," and "As per my last email", but have you ever seen an American say, "Okay, so this is what we call a 'teachable moment.'" ?

-Xanthe 🪶

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

So real of Taylor to rhyme “story” with “sorry” for her Brit and Canadian fans in Getaway Car

[daincrediblegg]

no it's not nearly 3 am no I didn't just start up ep 1 of the terror I ABSOLUTELY DID NOT ALMOST START CRYING

[neighbourhoodtwo]

the self restraint i show saving things to drafts

[eclipsecrowned]

LIKE DOUBLE DOWN ADA AND JACK FIND EACH OTHER REPULSIVE ON AN INTRINSIC LEVEL.

but damn it they still aren't as bad as their boss.

[dailymanners]

Bear with me because I am about to rant about something not blog related that's been grating on me ever since this blog gained more traction

USAmericans being Americancentric vs. Europeans every single time someone says something they don't like or don't agree with or is just coming from a place of different experiences than them assuming you MUST be a USAmerican coming from a place of Americancentrism: fight

For context, I do not live in the U.S., and do not base my posts off of experiences in the U.S., and as much as I find it annoying that sometimes USAmericans reply to my posts with assumptions that their experiences are universal, for example USAmericans replying to my post about closing the lid before you flush with "but public toilets don't have lids!" when they do in my country, I find it equally annoying if not even more annoying with how much Europeans assume that every time I post something they disagree with or is a different experience than them that I must be USAmerican and coming from a place of Americancentrism

For example when I made a post saying "use excuse me if you have to get into someone else's personal space" I had a bunch of British people replying to it something along the lines of "Are you Americans so uncivilized that you're not taught basic manners like this? Good thing us civilized Brits know to use excuse me!" when, again, I do not live in the U.S., the post was based on experiences I had here in my country and again, not in the U.S.

Or when I made a post just saying "don't be rude to people who got you a present you don't like" because I've had experiences here in my country of people sneering at and tossing aside presents they didn't live or even yelling at or scolding the gift giver just because it wasn't a color that they like, I did not say that you have to pretend to like it, just don't be rude and sneer at them or yell at the gift giver, but I still had a bunch of Germans replying something like "well you Americans may think you have to pretend to like gifts you don't actually like but us Germans believe in being honest!" (even though that's not even what I was saying) when again, I am not in the U.S., I have never said that I am in the U.S., this was based on experiences in my country which is not the U.S., but Europeans had to go and assume everyone who says something they don't fully like or agree with must be USAmerican.

And I know it's not just me, I've seen a lot of posts from people here on Tumblr in South American or Asia saying that Europeans are always assuming they're USAmerican and coming from a place of Americancentrism when they talk about their experiences in South American or Asia.

I saw a quote one time that was something like "USAmericans believe the entire world is the U.S. while Europeans believe the entire world is Europe + the U.S."

but the thing is that I DO live in Europe, my country is a small northern European country, but of course my experiences are going to be different than someone who is British or German or Swedish, but it's like people from those countries so often assume their experiences are universal to everyone in their country + the rest of Europe, so if a British person experiences being taught to use excuse me that MUST be universal to Europe, and that apparently nobody outside of Europe and the U.S. is on Tumblr, so if I experience being shoved by people who don't use excuse me (in my tiny northern European country) that MUST mean I live in the U.S. and MUST be USAmerican since their British experiences MUST be universal to everyone else on this website who isn't USAmerican

[kolimachris]

The Implication of "Maths"

I’m an American, but I’ll often watch British shows. Great British Baking Show, for one. Many Americans will be confused when we hear someone from the UK talk about “maths”. They’ll be trying to figure out how much each piece of dough needs to weigh and when it doesn’t come to them they’ll say “I was always bad at maths”. In America we just say math, in the UK they say maths. This seems like just one of those silly little differences like how Americans use an elevator instead of stairs while the British call it a lift. No big deal, right?

But if you ask someone from there why they say “maths” instead of “math” they will say that it’s because it’s shortening the word “mathematics”, not “mathematic”. That’s just wild! Can you imagine using the word “mathematic” (without the s) enough that when shortening it you need to specify whether you’re talking about mathematic or mathematics? In America we only use mathematic as an adjective (i.e. “a mathematic operation”). We don’t even have mathematic as a noun. But in Britain they feel the need to specify that “no, this isn’t mathematic, this is mathematics. That there is mathematic.” It’s hard enough to learn multiplication tables in school. I can’t imagine also having to learn whether division is mathematics and subtraction is mathematic or whatever they have.

Now you might say that the British aren’t specifying a difference between “math” and “maths”. After all, I only hear them call it maths. They aren’t saying “it’s because we don’t want to confuse people about whether this is mathematic or mathematics we’re doing, it’s just because the word is mathematics.”

God, that’s even worse. The ‘s’ doesn’t even specify anything, they just throw in an extra letter from elsewhere in the word anyway. Does every shortened word get extra letters? Is “trigonometry” shortened to “trigner”? Maybe they’re at least consistent enough to only add the last letter so it becomes “trigy”? I know English has never been the most consistent language regardless of whether it’s American English or British English, but the implications of “maths” make me glad I don’t have to deal with that minefield.

(In case it wasn’t clear, this is meant in friendly jest. I know that they’re just treating mathematics as though it were a plural and it’s not all that confusing. This is just a joke. It is the kind of thoughts I have when I think about it, but they’re just funny thoughts to me.)

[zombvic]

TINDER IRL PART one (harry lewis x reader)

summary : in which y/n gets invited to the sidemen tinder irl (usa edition) and meets a certain brit and their instant friendship slowly progresses into something bigger

face claim : no one right now (kendall jenner later)

notes : reader is like a 2019 ICON like disstracks against the paul brothers, ricegum etc.. now STILL doing youtube but on a much more lowkey basis. also im sorry but i had to add that the reader is an f1 fan IM SORRY (im locked in as an f1 girlie) 😵 yall im not american or even close to a native english speaker (#slavicstruggles) but i tried making the readeramerican cause i tried to do the american la gf x british bloke bf xx god bless 'merica RAAAAAH. also i used lines from like all the videos and made my own cause the lines from this video were insane.. last also, don't be a ghost reader 🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️

pairings : harry lewis x reader , sidemen x platonic!reader , all the other youtuber in the videos x platonic!reader

warnings : drugs (ketamine joke)

You got invited to the SIDEMEN Tinder In Real Life youtube video. You are acutely aware to what the Sidemen are and you've seen their videos before. Now to be fair, the genres between your channel and their channels were pretty different. The Sidemen were known for football challenges, those 100$ vs 100,000$ challenges and other things with a similar vibe. You on the other hand, you did vlogs, lifestyle hack and tips, in your time you've achieved some disstracks and occasionally broke down some formula 1 grand prix weekend.

The moment you saw the instagram dm from the Sidemen official account you weren't sure how to react. Should you be excited? scared? worried? yeah.. all. It was the Sidemen, Logan Paul, Mike and George (idk who Mike and George but who cares).

Eventually you accepted the offer and waited till the day you had to be "picked up" by kinda random men for 5 minutes straight. The day came, you got dressed for the video shoot, they made you wait with the other girls until they called your name and then you walked in.

"Hi, I'm (your name). I'm 24 and i'm from Newark, New Jersey" (go devs go) You've practiced that line like 50 times before you left, not because you wanted to come out of this video with a new man but because you didn't want to embarrass yourself lmao.

"Hi, I'm Vikk. I'm 26 and are you from Tennessee, because you're the only ten i see"

"Would've been funny if i hadn't just said im from New Jersey dude, no sorry"

"Hello, I'm Logan-"

"No. Complicated history" you said as you swiped left.

"One chance please"

"Alright, BUT u gotta watch it tho"

"Okay. SO. If i were a pizza delivery guy, i'd be giving YOU the tip"

"Ew no sorry lmfao.. that was weak as fuck"

"Alright wow, Hello, I'm Tobi. I'm 31 and they say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?"

"Sure go on.. yes. I love that"

Hello, My name is Ethan and let only latex stand between our love.

"Yeah thats funny.. alright, go on"

"Yo, I'm KSI. I'm 30 and you know how they say skin is the largest organ on the human body? Well.. Not in my case."

"Lmao, yes go on"

“Hello, I'm Mike. I'm 37 and girl, you don't need no vibrator when you got this Pickled Dick.”

"Jesus Christ. No, get out"

"Hi, My name is Simon and.. Simon says you want to swipe right"

"Lmao. I love that, Yes"

"Sup, I'm George and I’m peanut butter. You’re jelly. Let’s have sex"

"Jeeesus, that’s crazy bro... no"

"Hello, My name is Josh and I find your lack of nudity disturbing"

"No, I'm so sorry" (guys i love freya sm i couldnt do this)

"Uhm, Hello. I'm Harry. I'm 26 years old and what do ketamine and your underpants have in common?"

"I don't know" you said looking at the blonde-ish man confused.

"I'd like to sniff them both."

The whole room fell into a laughter, you included. "Yes"

"BUT I GET A NO?" Logan exclaims. "What a scam"

WHY DID YOU SAY NO?

(NO : Logan, Josh, Mike, Vikk and George)

"For Logan i think we left this in 2019 and rightfully so. For Josh i dont really know tbh, i just thought his line couldve been better. Mike, i think you know why i said no. Vikk.. Im gonna be honest i dont even remember what youve said but im sure i had my reasons and George, you couldve been waaaaaay smoother mate.. tough luck"

YALL. this is part one because i cant be arsed and put it all right here right now 😁😁😁