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duelistkingdom · 5 months

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dive bar on the east side

Summary: when divine crosses the line, yusei is there to pick up the pieces of aki's broken heart.

Rating: T

Ships: Yusei Fudo/Aki Izayoi

Author’s note: this was written for the @yearoftheotpevent with the prompt of “musician/band au” and features a divaki break up.

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At this point, Aki very much hated Divine.

She hated that he always seemed to know best. She hated his stupid pompador. She hated the black gloves he wore everywhere. She hated that if she wrote something that meant something to her, he decided how she should edit it. And most of all, she hated how he kissed her. It was a wake up call: that the man she'd been dating since she first stepped on the scene and proclaimed to care about her career didn't care about her at all. She wasn't even sure what really made her first snap, actually. All she knew was that she was sick of him. And she was sick of his promises that if she waited just a little bit longer, he'd help her record her debut album. Each EP was received well, but he insisted that she wasn't ready to actually put something out.

Instead, he focused his efforts on his own career time and time again. Aki had written so many songs that she'd let him use on his albums and give away to other girls he produced for. And now this time, he'd gone too far. If it hadn't been for this professional betrayal, she may have let him continue to walk all over her. She might have let him continue to think he was getting away with cheating on her. But the lack of credit for her work on some girl's debut album that he produced when he kept swearing to help her with hers? When he prioritized some bitch over her? She packed everything in their shared apartment that was hers - it amounted to a single duffel bag - and walked out.

Where she was going, she didn't know. And she didn't know what pulled her to the dive bar that night. All she knew is that she needed a drink, and this place looked as good as any to drown her sorrows. That's when she ran into the bartender that would change her life. "What's got you down?"

"I just left my boyfriend," Aki said, making a face. "So obviously I need a double of a vodka coke, please."

The bartender looked her up down, and shook his head. "Sorry, I'll need ID. It's challenge 25." Aki rolled her eyes, but since she'd taken everything out of the apartment, she had her passport on her. She passed the ID over, and the bartender gave a nod before handing it back. "Tell you what, Izayoi. First drink's on me. Do you wanna tell me why you broke up with your boyfriend or am I going to have to guess?"

"You wouldn't be able to guess why," Aki said with a sigh. "It's not exactly the most common reason for breaking up with a guy. Besides, don't you gotta watch the bar for other customers?"

"On a Tuesday night?" He laughed at this, performing a trick with the vodka bottle: tossing it high in the air, catching it in his other hand, and pouring it in the glass. "I'm afraid there's never a lot of people around here. So did he cheat on you?"

He'd pushed the vodka coke towards her, and Aki slammed it down. The burn was exactly what she was after, and she shook her head. "Another," she said, glaring at him. "And he did something much worse than that."

The bartender poured her another, passing it to her. "Do I need to call the cops on him?"

"Cops won't help," she said, knocking back the second. "He didn't hit me, if that was your guess. He just... was a dick. Another."

"Maybe you should have some water with your drinks... or at least some food," the bartender remarked, arching a brow as he made another for her. Aki noticed he was less heavy on the pour this time, and she didn't exactly appreciate that. "So he was a dick? And you hit your breaking point, I'm guessing."

The haze of alcohol was starting to ply her, and she knew it would be stupid to talk shit in a bar to a strange she barely knew. And yet, she couldn't help herself anymore: she needed to get off her chest. "For years, I'd been writing songs, right? And he helped me produced a few EPs, but kept promising we'd make my debut album together. And he never did help make my debut album. Well, I recently heard from a little birdie he was executive producer on some new girl's debut album and so of course I went out and bought his work. Or should I say my work: every single song on it? I fuckin wrote it. And he had the nerve to not credit me on a single fuckin one!"

"I'll kill him for you," the bartender replied, and there was a fierce look in his eye - as if he might really hunt down Divine for this slight. "He stole the songs you wrote and gave them to someone else? That's beyond fucked up. You're better off without that piece of shit."

This validation was exactly what Aki needed - she hadn't realized she'd been needing it, but the bartender gave it so easily and so freely. "You can't kill for me and not tell me your name."

"Fudo," he replied, passing her another drink. "Yusei Fudo. I can see why you needed a drink so bad."

"Yeah. And now I don't really have anywhere to stay, either," she said with a soft sight, shaking her head. She'd left the key to the apartment with Divine - she didn't want the temptation to go back to there. It'd be so easy to just go back, ask for him to let her in, and try to pretend it'd never happened. But that would be stupid, wouldn't it? "The apartment was in his name."

"Well, since you've had so much to drink, I can't exactly let you drive yourself either," Yusei said, leaning forward across the bar. "I can let you crash with me for the night."

It was the first moment that Aki had gotten to really gaze into his eyes, and it hit her like a truck. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the fact he was being so nice to her while nursing her still bleeding emotional wounds, maybe it was the fact that he hadn't pressured her with anything so far. Whatever it was, she couldn't help but feel that she was being drawn in closer. Again, she was unable to figure out what it was that was holding her hostage. All she knew is that she'd never seen that color blue before - it was almost purple. Were they purple? She'd never known anyone to actually have purple eyes before. His hair was messy, with streaks of blond, and she imagined running her hands through it. "You know you're dangerously close to offering to be a rebound," she remarked.

He arched a brow, and it occurred to her that despite how nice he was being to her, he was still ultimately a man and in her experience, men wanted only one thing out of her. "Well, you are quite intoxicated, Izayoi," he said. "If you're still interested in the morning once you've sobered up..."

That was new. Aki was instantly confused, trying to work out what would make him take pause about hooking up with her tonight. Was it really just that she was drunk? That didn't sync up with anything she knew about the world, and suddenly she was more intrigued by him. "And if I'm still interested in you being a rebound?"

"You'd be more than welcome to use me in any way you see fit," he replied with a smirk. It was the last thing Aki remembered before the alcohol claimed her memory.

She awoke, dazed and confused in a bedroom she'd never seen before. Aki sat up, blinking as she tried to recollect how she got from point a to point b. She remembered anger first. The debut album with some other girl that contained songs that she'd written - all songs Divine claimed he wrote. She balled her fist, trying to let go of the anger and finding herself unable to. Being angry about what Divine had done, however, wouldn't help her figure out how she got her. She remembered the dive bar and the handsome bartender who'd offered to let her crash at his place. As far as she could tell, he'd put her to bed and not bothered her since. She wasn't sure if she was grateful for that or humiliated that he didn't want to touch her. It didn't track with anything that she was used to. And well, honestly, it wasn't worth focusing on. Not when she had to get her music back.

Except she couldn't exactly focus on that either. There was an odd smell in the air - eggs? Maybe? She rubbed her eyes, groaning as the headache started to hit. She did, in fact, have more than a few drinks last night after all. She wasn't surprised that she probably had a hangover. Well, she might as well get out of bed and figure out where she was going to go next. She wouldn't want to impose on this bartender further. She got out of the bed, surprised to see that her duffle bag was still there. Aki went through it, making sure that everything was still in there. Everything was still in order, so she pulled out a change of clothes - a nice pair of black denim shorts and a red cotton top. It'll be nice to wear when she's wandering the streets to find the next play she was going to.

Where that was, she didn't know yet. Regardless, it was a new day, and she was ready to begin anew.

#myfanfic #faithshipping #year of otp #year of the otp

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clara-maybe-ontheroad · 7 months

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Current watchlist (September 25, 2023)

Outside of my consistent obsession for a certain show (ahem, guess which one), I haven't actually watched nearly as much stuff as usual, courtesy of the life roller coaster I guess ! which this month included organizing a whole music festival, job hunting, family drama and recovering from almost chopping off my finger, fun stuff. Oh look I've become like those cooking blog articles with way too much fluff about their life at the beginning lol So anyway !

Currently watching :

Only Friends (ep 7, as per the copious amount of shitposting and reblogging meta, I'm loving it, it's delivering the toxic mess it promised and it's about to get worse)

Hidden Agenda (ep 8, things are heating up and Zo and Joke have all the green flags ! Kinda don't want to continue if it means drama is coming)

Utsukushii Kare season 2 (technically just finished it haha, it was so beautiful and so was the movie, I really gained a new appreciation of Kiyoi and his struggles)

Love Me if You Dare (ep 11, I had tried watching years ago and had never made it past episode 1, but it does really get better and more interesting as it goes on and is a lot less polished than most Cdramas nowadays, in a good way)

Neon Genesis Evangelion (ep 25, it's getting really out there and I don't know where it's going but I'm enjoying it)

Love is Blind season 5 (ep 4, yeah I'm that person watching a reality show like that as it comes out, very glad Chris got himself out of it)

On pause :

The Warp Effect (ep 2, the story is cool but I have a hard time getting into it, the themes are very interesting like expected from P'Jojo)

A Boss and a Babe (ep 2, I was curious since discovering ForceBook in Only Friends but everything feels so fake, I don't find them credible in their roles, the lines feel forced, the pacing is weird, nothing is working for me so far)

Rewatching : The Vampire Diaries (they just put the show on Netflix and just like that I was screwed), UnReal (I need the balance with Love is Blind and the reminder of the heavy manipulation that goes into these shows), Fringe season 1 (my roommate is definitely hooked now haha)

Movies : none, except Utsukushii Kare Eternal. It's bad. I'm taking the plane to see my gf soon though so that means a movie binge ! Unless ... I just got Amazon Prime so I could finally watch season 2 of Good Omens and the documentary Shiny Happy People, so maybe there won't be as much movie watching as usual. We shall see

#only friends the series #hidden agenda #utsukushii kare #utsukushii kare eternal #love me if you dare #neon genesis evangelion #love is blind season 5 #the warp effect #a boss and a babe #vampire diaries #unreal #fringe #cdrama #bl shows #thai bl #current watchlist

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luvbrie · 2 years

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noise complaint

pairing: doyoung x reader / idol!doyoung x idol!reader ; soulmate au

warnings: 2nd person, lowercase & informal language, reader is in a kpop group, this is based off of ep 25 of treasure map

wordcount: 1.5k words / bulletpoint scenario

doyoung couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit disappointed when he saw the words imprinted on his wrist.

although it made for a great laugh, it wasn’t very romantic at all, and we all know the hopeless romantic doyoung is…

‘could you keep it down please?’

was his soulmate really going to say that when they first meet?

he didn’t let it get to him, though

after all, haruto’s was ‘that would be $20.33 with tax’ and that was far worse than a noise complaint in his eyes

even so, doyoung wasn’t ever that noisy, was he?

well, there wasn’t much to do about it though.

he makes the most of it

everytime he gets a little too rowdy in public, he always gets the tiniest hope that maybe his soulmate was right around the corner

he might be a little strange for thinking that way, but he’s always been an odd one, hasn’t he?

it soon became a running joke; anytime doyoung was getting a little out of hand, one of the treasure members would say something along the lines of ‘shut up doyoung, or else your soulmate will get mad’

HE GETS EMBARRASSED BECAUSE THERE’S NO DENYING IT

still, he’s super excited to meet you

he constantly tells teumes about how he can’t wait to meet you

it seems every time he makes a t-log, he somehow manages to mention how he hopes he’ll meet you while going out or something like that :,))

on your end, you had an impressive ‘oh.. my god, it’s you’ written on your wrist

you thought it could be kinda cute,

as much as you liked to imagine the cute scenarios that could come with the short sentence on you, you just didn’t think about it that much

you did have other matters on your hands, and in your opinion, they were much more important

even if you weren’t constantly searching for your soulmate, fate would bring them to you, right? that’s what it’s supposed to do anyway..

it was just any other day and you were off on a trip to a nice retreat with your group members

you were giving a tour of the house with one of your older members, (Group Member1), when in the distance, there was some very loud shouting

it startled (GM1) so bad they almost screamed lol

you both went to check it out and it seemed there was a large group of boys swimming and playing on their trampoline next door

you commented on how there was a camera crew there as well and joked how it could be another kpop group

you didn’t really say much else, and you resumed with the tour

once everyone settled down, your group was supposed to be having their own free time

you were just trying to nap

when you heard the LOUDEST SHRIEK OF ALL TIME

DUDE !!!

you rubbed your eyes and just stared at the camera, blinking as the horrendous yells and the most ear-breaking laughter you’ve heard in your life played in the background

you looked for the staff, and literally begged them to go tell them to shut UP

they said they’d let you go pay a visit if it doesn’t stop in the next hour

you didn’t even try to go back to sleep and started bothering all your groupmates

it came to a point where your group mates were asking the staff to go next door and tell them to be quiet just so you could go to sleep and stop talking

a little ironic…

two hours passed and it seemed like the noise had died down

unfortunately for you, you never got to take your nap

because the noise had come back right after you commented on it in the form of EAR-SPLITTING KARAOKE

you didn’t even ask the staff this time, you just slipped on your shoes and went out

they didn’t stop you anyway

two of the staff did go with you though, because safety [be careful out there guys]

you knocked on the door

it took a while for them to answer so you joked with the cameramen a bit

“how should i make them pity me? i have to look as tired as possible. i should bust out my acting skills.”

doyoung seemed to be the only one that heard the knock on the door

everyone was far too occupied in the karaoke to notice

the staff was going to go get it, but he volunteered to go

he didn’t really like the song they were singing anyway LOL

as he exited the karaoke room, it was only then did he realize… it was loud

like LOUD.

he could hear everything, even from the entrance

you could assume where his mind was going, but after years of hoping, he wouldn’t be disappointed if it wasn’t them

the staff opened the door before doyoung could, and they greeted the people on the other side

you apologized to them for bothering them so randomly

doyoung was kind of spacing out, but not enough to miss that you were really cute

your eyes wandered to the boy standing next to the person who greeted you, and his cheeks burned red as he realized you were looking at him. crap, you caught him staring.

you only smiled, “could you keep it down please?”

doyoung was STUNNED. the staff seemed to be as well.

REALLY?? NOW???

“oh. my god. it’s YOU”

it was silent for a couple moments

it was just complete, shocked silence

doyoung was quick to break the tension

“well, i didn’t really think i would meet you like this, but i’m glad i met you now!”

YOU KIND OF FREAKED OUT BECAUSE ‘why is he SO CUTE????’

“ahh, you’re right, i wasn’t really expecting it either. um, ah, if you don’t mind, could i have your socials? or at least your name? i would love to stick around but i’m on a bit of a schedule here, haha.”

“oh no don’t worry! i get it. my name is kim doyoung, here i can give my number, if you have your phone…?”

“i… do not…”

as soon as the words came out of your mouth, doyoung clumsily rushed back into the house, searching for a pen and paper

you could heard crashing and things being thrown about coming from inside and you did your best to hold back a laugh,,

doyoung soon came out with a stupidly cute smile (and some very crumbled paper) and you swore you would’ve cried if he KEPT SMILING AT YOU LIKE THAT ..

in a haste, doyoung rather ungracefully pinned the paper to the wall and wrote his number

your eyes lit up upon receiving the paper (doyoung noticed and he couldn’t help but admire just how beautiful you were)

then he Also noticed how… you handed the paper back to him…?

“uh.. i can’t… read it.”

oh.

doyoung apologizes frantically, flusteredness taking over his reasoning

he was so excited that he wrote too fast resulting in, well, illegible handwriting

despite his mortification, he didn’t fail to notice how you smiled fondly at his state

he felt himself getting nervous under your soft gaze, simply because you were just so pretty.

honestly would’ve exploded. lucky for him, you spoke up, “here, i’ll just give you my number. text me your name so i know it’s you.”

as you reached out for the pen and paper, he felt his heart skip a beat when your fingers brushed together

doyoung stood like a child waiting to ask his mom for a kinder surprise egg.

the few seconds of silence was broken by the rustling of paper being handed back to the anticipating boy.

“here, it’s been really nice talking to you :)”

doyoung died for the third time, within 15 minutes. he gives a bright, boyish smile, “yes! i can’t wait to talk to you more!”

you both bid your farewells and when the door shut, doyoung felt his cheeks glowing red.

he had to take a minute before he walked back into the karaoke room

the boys immediately latched onto doyoung, “why’d you leave?” “we played your favorite song!” “TRAITOR, YOU SAID YOU WOULD SING OLD TOWN ROAD WITH ME”

“the neighbors told us to be quiet…”

some members started laughing, others know immediately. COUGH YEDAM AND MASHIHO COUGH COUGH

pls when the camera are off… save dobby he won’t live from the embarrassment of treasure SOBBING

oh you bet he’s texting you , double texting you, TRIPLE TEXTING YOU when you don’t respond in an instant.

he’s pretty much on his phone 24/7 now

he swears every time you send a heart he just gets sent to the moon he’s so WHIPPED

pulls the cheesiest pickup lines he knows for u. only for u bae mwah

whenever you start teasing him a little too much, he’ll pull the “your first words to me were ‘could you keep it down’.”

but we all know

yeah, sure it’s quite the funny situation

but doyoung wouldn’t trade it for the world.

#treasure imagine #treasure imagines #treasure x reader #treasure doyoung x reader #doyoung x reader #kim doyoung #doyoung #choi hyunsuk #park jihoon #yoshinori #kim junkyu #bang yedam #yedam yedam bang yedam #park jeongwoo #haruto #so junghwan

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sortasirius · 3 years

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What the Fuck Happened to the SPN Finale?

Okay so here it is, my Charlie Kelly style manifesto.

Before I get into it, I recognize that I will look like this to many of you, and that’s okay, I understand:

Secondly, your personal Takes about the writers don’t interest me, I don’t need to hear them. This, as I’ll explain, is going to remain a writer positive blog, and that’s the end of it.

Third, and most importantly: some of what I’m going to talk about is fact, and some is highly educated speculation. I will notate what is speculation, just so there’s no confusion or hot takes in my inbox that I’m a conspiracy theorist or stirring shit up for no reason.

A list of what I’ll be discussing

The episode in regards to the rest of the season

The episode issues: length, editing

Scene placement and speculation of scenes cut

The scrubbing of Jack, Cas, Eileen

Network involvement and general timeline of when things were cut

Misha: theories on where he was, official company line, why we can’t expect to hear anything directly

The silence of the cast post episode (in Misha’s case, mid episode) and what this might mean

Jensen speaking with Kripke about the ending: why it doesn’t mean what you might think (also why kripke remained positive on the ending)

Walker, and why this episode had a major shift

Why the network would do this or get involved

Why the writers of the show simply aren’t the bad guys here, and what I “want” out of this post, since I know it’ll get asked

This is very long and under a cut, but I hope you’ll give it a read.

The Episode In Regards to the Rest of the Season

So, I’ve discussed this already here, but it’s the most obvious thing to me, and that’s the way this episode simply doesn’t fit with the rest of the season.

These people in this room have, truly, been nothing but consistent when it comes to their arcs, especially this season, and the marked dropoff in quality for the finale episode is just too sus to discount to me. Dabb’s whole focus has been character-based. In his seasons, we’ve moved far away from MOTW and bro-codependency, the found family taking it’s place. Does it really sit right to anyone that that was all thrown away in literally the last episode of the entire show?

This is speculation on my part, but as a writer myself, there is no way I would be happy or willing to stamp my name on something that I didn’t think would, at the very least, wrap up the season+ character arcs that I and my team had been crafting.

And before anyone comes in here saying, “well GOT did that!” Bruh. The writing was on the wall for GOT long before the final episode. You could tell that the showrunners just wanted to be done (not only from the plot, but from the fact that they lobbied for a shorter season). Miss me with that, it doesn’t apply here. Andrew has, besides Singer and J2, been with the show longer than anyone. He cares, he is meticulous and detailed, and this ending feels worse than anything Bucklemming has ever written, let alone Dabb.

Additionally, I’ve seen a lot of people say that Dabb was never behind Destiel, that it was all Bobo and Meredith and no one else. That is reductive to the point of insult of the work Dabb has done to get this greenlit. This man did not write the s13 Dean grief arc to be slandered like this. That being said, YES, Bobo and Meredith were the leads on the DeanCas arc this season, but ANDREW IS THE SHOWRUNNER, TO GET EVEN THE CONFESSION APPROVED BY THE NETWORK HE WOULD HAVE TO HAVE THEIR BACKS. AND HE DID.

Finale Issues

So, now that we’ve gotten the fact that this episode doesn’t hit on any of the major themes the show was barrelling towards all season, let’s discuss the fact that the episode is just...weird.

Not only is it shorter than any other episode (I think with the intro and the credits/crew thing at the end, it was around 38 mins), but it was also...idk, 90% filler?

One of the lovely humans in the POLOL server did the legwork here, and broke it down:

This is weird, y’all. Most series finales are LONGER than normal (Lost, SOA, Longmire are the ones I can think of off the top of my head), and for the final episode to be this? I saw more than one person point out that we only really needed 19 episodes, what was the point of 20? AND THAT’S EXACTLY IT? WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS FINAL EPISODE IF THIS WAS ALL WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GET?

It simply doesn’t make any sense, the first half of the episode was rushed, a final monster hunt gone wrong, but in the second half? Nothing really happened? Sam lived his entire life and Dean just drove around. It doesn’t make sense to have all the emotional arcs left unaddressed in an episode that definitely needed some kind of spark.

Here’s the speculation I have: the episode seemingly went through a lot of changes between the initial inception of the final season and when we actually got it, but I think it would have been passable (as in, we wouldn’t be sitting here asking each other why each arc feels incomplete) until the editing room got ahold of it. The only think that makes this episode make sense is network fuckery. Truly, that is the only thing. It explains the weird, cuts, the rushed pacing of the first half followed by nothing in the second half, the double montages of “Wayward Son” back to back, and Dean just...driving around for the last half of the episode.

Scene Placement and Speculation of Scenes Cut

Before I get into this section, the info of the shots in the episode I have come from a source that @occamshipper got a week or so before the finale. She’s talked about this here.

So here’s what Min was given:

1-5: 1 INT MEN OF LETTERS – DEAN’S ROOM Dean is greeted by Miracle

6-10: 6 INT MEN OF LETTERS – HALLWAY/SAM’S ROOM Sam has his routine

D1 1 11-15: 15 EXT FARM HOUSE Establishing

N1 1/8 16-20: 19 Dad’s journal, marker, drawing of masked man in journal.

21-25: 23 INT IMPALA – PMP Driver picks the music

N2 1 3/8 1,2 26-30: 28pt2 INT BARN: A face from the past

28pt3 Sam and Dean say goodbye

28pt4 Shot early for technical reasons, presumably the overhead shot

N2 31-45: 41 INT MEN OF LETTERS – SAM’S ROOM Sam’s alarm goes off D4 1/8 1 46-60: 56 INT N7glasses for Sam, laptop.

So...it all fits right? It all tracks with the actual episode, where it lands, etc. The issue is between shots 29-40 which were apparently “too big to spoil.” Uh. Where are they? And where’s 28 pt4?

After Dean dies, the next scene is Sam burning him, then shot 31, the shot of his alarm going off.

So. Where are those 11ish shots?

PLUS we have the boards, which are scenes we KNOW were actually shot:

As well as scenes for 20 that were shot in 19.

It’s just...weird, it’s weird and again hits on the fact that the episode is so short and like 80% montage.

The Scrubbing of Jack, Cas, and Eileen

So now we have to reckon with the fact that Eileen was last mentioned by Sam after she got snapped by Chuck, Jack’s last mention is that he’s off being God somewhere, and Cas’ last mention is a ~knowing look~ between Dean and Bobby.

I’m sorry, make it make sense:

???????? That’s the end if it? They don’t need to be discussed after this??? It’s just simply not something a writer would do, they would not introduce these characters, these arcs, without thinking there’s going to be some kind of follow through here.

So not only were three major characters (including two leads and both of the original characters’ love interests) completely wiped from the finale episode, it was as though Sam and Dean never even needed them, which just...ain’t it.

So why Eileen and Jack too? Why not just take Cas out of it if they were afraid of the gay? Because, ultimately, the episode went back to Kripke’s original story: just the bros, they only need each other and no one else. They don’t want anyone else, they don’t need anyone else. Easier to go back to something they knew was successful than trust the writers and their audience and take a big leap.

Alex even said he shot for 20 with “some of the guys” here. What happened to that footage?

The complete 180 of it all still shocks me, I still cannot believe that we were essentially at the finish line, and the network just stopped short, and decided to go run another race, at the expense of the arc of this fifteen year legacy show.

Network Involvement and When Things Were Cut

Okay, now into the juicy stuff.

So I’ve pretty well established that network fuckery is clear, but how much did they get involved, what was the original intent?

Well again, we may never actually know what Andrew’s original script was, but I think, at the least, it would involve Dean speaking his truth to Cas and Sam living a life with Eileen.

Now, it seems today, that Misha said that Jimmy Novak was supposed to be in the finale in one iteration of the script, and while initially my brain was like “that truly makes no sense and he’s either straight up lying or telling a half truth,” I think what may be happening is Misha talking about as much as he can right now.

So Jimmy right. Weird as fuck. Why would he been in the Roadhouse and not Cas? My current thought (this is about as reachy as I’ll get) is that Jimmy had no lines, could he have been in the Roadhouse as a red herring, like it said “Jimmy” in the script but it was just Cas in human clothes, a way to get around the network saying Cas couldn’t be in the final scene. Also, you’ll notice that Misha didn’t say that Cas wasn’t supposed to be in the ep at all, just Jimmy in the last scene.

All this to say, there have clearly been multiple versions of the script, getting lighter and lighter with Cas and Eileen as the network pulled further and further back. Remember, Dabb has to get things approved before they get shot, and if the network kept asking and asking and asking to cut Cas and Eileen, he had to find a way to work around it. Granted, I still think that if we had been able to get a Dabb script that wasn’t torn to shreds in editing, it wouldn’t be so bad. It may not be what a lot of us wanted (Dean speaking his truth to Cas and a reciprocation), but doing everything he could to give it to us in subtext or visual clues.

Plus, in all honesty, my man can’t keep his story straight anyway. He said twice in his panel that the Empty and offscreen Heaven ending weren’t his original ending either.

In addition, remember that Jensen did ADR post episode 18, AND said in a meet and greet last weekend that Dean’s reaction to Cas’ confession was “cut down.” (Source here). Many of us clowns got excited when we first heard about ADR, because we thought it would be upping the ante on Dean’s reaction, but I remember being a little sus when it was just crying. My speculation on that is that they cut out Dean actually SAYING something, @winchestersingerautorepair spoke about that here.

The biggest sins were, in my opinion, committed during editing, where the network got too gun shy and sliced the episode until it was nothing but a heartless bro-fest of a finale, not mentioning anything about the other major characters that we all love, and letting the boys just suffer in separation until Sam died and finally joined Dean in Heaven. The editing came by cutting all the major emotional beats between anyone other than Dean and Sam, leaving the skeleton of the story intact, just shorter and less...poignant than it was ever supposed to be.

Misha

We know Misha was in Vancouver, we know he quarantined, but we also know he wasn’t in the final scene, when he spoke about being in the last moment of the show months ago. We were not crazy, he was there, he quarantined, and, in all likelihood (speculation but fitting with the timeline), he actually may have shot something (not much, but something).

I have sources here, here, here, and here showing where Misha was at that time.

Remember, the man was completely open about coming back until they finished shooting (look at this thread). The switch happened, just like everything else, halfway through them shooting.

Please also remember Jake Abel posting his “Where’s Misha” video here. Jake isn’t malicious, he isn’t being nasty here. Misha was there, and everyone that’s trying to convince people he’s wasn’t just...isn’t telling the truth about it.

This is one of the things that makes me really mad, because they’re literally attempting to gaslight people into thinking, “oh we were totally wrong he was never supposed to be there” WHEN HE WAS THERE, WE KNOW HE WAS THERE.

So we’ve already heard from several people (Meghan Fitzmartin, Jay, a PA on the set of 19 (WHO WAS NOT WORKING FOR 20), Misha himself) that this was all down to Covid restrictions. Ultimately, as this post says, we’ve heard FIVE versions of where Misha was. None of it makes sense, but the Covid protocol seems to be the company line that others are repeating.

You may ask: why? Why lie to all of us when we have questions? Why, in Jay’s case, say that we’re all spreading false lies to stir up trouble, when we just have questions and things that do not make sense. Simply? Warner Brothers is absolutely massive. These people have their careers to protect and are likely all under NDAs. They want to work for WB again and don’t want to burn bridges, including Misha. It sucks, but that’s why it’s unlikely that we’ll hear someone come out and say, “yeah we’re lying to you.”

Silence of the Cast Post Episode

So this is...probably the worst part of all this, at least in my opinion.

The guys had all been pretty excited about the end of the show (especially Jared, but Jensen’s panel last week was Jensen as happy and jokey and positive as I’ve ever seen him. He was so excited about episode 18, about what it meant for Dean and for Cas, and I just cannot buy that he would have been that excited unless he thought there was something more in the episode.

Misha live-tweeted the episode, and was watching it with his kids. It’s well known that Misha and the kids don’t watch the show because it’s too scary, and let’s ask ourselves, why would he have them watch an episode that he’s barely even mentioned in?

He also stopped live-tweeting at a very specific point in the episode (Dean’s death) and has not mentioned Supernatural since then.

None of them, not Jared, Jensen, Misha, or even Alex, said anything about the episode for nearly 36 hours, when Jensen posted a salty photo on instagram. It’s just...not what you’d expect for the end of a 15 year show, when the cast and crew are so close to the fans, so close to each other.

My theory? They didn’t know. They thought Misha was, at least, going to be in the episode in some way, and when he wasn’t, they decided not to say anything.

You really think that Jensen “Heller” Ackles would have been so excited about the end of the show last week if he thought Cas wasn’t going to be in it at all? Nah son, doesn’t make any sense.

Even today, in Jared and Misha’s panels, they seemed sad and...more than a little careful, both saying that there were things they couldn’t say, both talking around things that we all have questions on.

Jensen Speaking with Kripke

So this is where a lot of people are getting fodder to take shots at the writers, saying that Jensen hated it from the beginning, but I don’t think so. I actually think I know what Jensen went to him about, and it wasn’t the lack of Cas or the weird pacing or the montages (which I don’t think were there when Jensen got the script); I think it was the manner of Dean’s death.

I know a lot of people were upset about that, upset with how...normal it was, coming off an episode where they literally beat God. I actually didn’t mind it, I thought it was an interesting thematic take to be like: you can be a hero all your life, but sometimes shit happens, and you just die.

But imagine how hard that was for Jensen to read. He would run to Kripke for that, because for him, Dean dying by being impaled by a piece of rebar had to be tough to swallow.

So, why didn’t Kripke say that? Why didn’t he say, “oh well he had a problem with Dean’s death, none of that other stuff was in the script.”

Guys. Why would he get involved? He’s not going to burn bridges any more than anyone else is. He said the ending was good because it’s the easy thing to do, it’s simple, will cause him no problems in his career, and he can just ignore the people trying to engage with him on it.

Walker

Something else to talk about is the major shift this episode had from the rest of the season: the shift from Dean to Sam. I am NOT saying that Sam isn’t important, he definitely, absolutely is, but it was DEAN who really needed to wrap up his arc, Sam just needed to move on, get married to Eileen, become the leader he was always meant to. So what changed? What was with the shirtless scene, the Austin number and random case there, most of the episode being heavily Sam focused, going through his entire life in a montage?

Anyone else notice the 375 Walker promos, or Jared’s little spiel about Walker and how he hoped SPN fans would “come along for the ride.”

It’s...kinda obvious? CW wanted to appeal to who they think the key demographic of SPN and Walker is: rural areas in the South. It would explain a lot, why so much editing, why so Sam focused, the Austin number, the number of Walker promos, all of it.

I’m not saying this is fact, I don’t know that it is, but it is a little suspicious that even in Jared’s panel today, he talked A LOT about Walker and how he hopes SPN fans will watch it.

Why Would the Network Get Involved?

Simply put: $$$

If they think Walker can be the new SPN, and that those crazy SPN fans liked it originally, it’s a lot safer to go with the “original intent” of the show than do something risky (like making one of your two original leads queer).

And? They don’t care. They don’t care that the episode didn’t make sense, they don’t care that all the emotional arcs were left hanging, they don’t care by (potentially) smashing together two of Dean’s monologues (one to Sam, one to Cas) that it came of as...gross. ( @curioussubjects wrote a beautiful post showing how part of that death speech was likely meant for Dean here). They don’t care, they never have, they just want to make their money and move on from the too-loud fandom that fought for representation too hard for too long.

It can’t help but feel insidious, which, honestly, it might be, but it really all comes down to the next cash cow, which, they think, is Walker, even at the cost of the fifteen year legacy show.

The Writers and What I Want

So here it is, all this weird, sus shit laid out on the line. And you know what? To me, there is no way to blame the writers, because they didn’t want this.

I don’t think Dabb and Bobo would have gone ahead with the confession in 18 without thinking that there would be some closure to that arc, they wouldn’t have done that not only to the fans, but for the sake of their own story as well: no writer wants to start something that they can’t finish. (And this applies to both Cas and Eileen).

Here’s a basic rundown of what I think happened: they had a clear arc from 18-20, ending in reciprocation at some level from Dean, Sam marrying Eileen, Hunter Sam as the new Bobby, Dean in heaven with Cas and big roadhouse reunion at the end. Covid prevented a good amount of that. Network had to stare at big gay 18 for six months, got cold feet. Thought about Walker, target audience and alienation of the rural areas if it went full gay. Misha quarantined and likely shot something (not much), he was then cut by execs and went home. They likely added in lines referencing Eileen and Cas to make it clear but more subtextual. They wrap, editing gets it and hacks it to pieces, so we get a shorter episode that’s mostly montages and jarringly bro-centric with nothing else. Arcs are left hanging. Dabb gets episode but it’s too late, there’s nothing he can do. Actors aren’t told so they can continue to do positive PR for the ending, they all found out at the same time we did: hence almost complete silence about the finale.

And you know what? They warned us. I talked about it here, but they’ve been telling us all season that Chuck wasn’t the writer, he’s the network. I don’t think, still, that they thought it would be cut up like this, into something so unsalvageable that it’s been panned by almost everyone, even people who didn’t care much about Dean and Cas.

Finally, a masterpiece can be ruined by editing, and while I’m not sure even the script they ended up shooting on was a masterpiece (due to the network meddling already), but to me it’s blatantly obvious that it’s no one but the network that caused this, that took away closure for Dean, Cas, and even Sam.

So what do I want? Nothing really, there’s nothing we can do, but I wrote this mostly to show people that the writers are not your enemy. In fact, to the people trashing them? You’re doing exactly what the CW wants you to: blame the obvious targets, blame Misha, blame Jensen and Jared, blame Dabb. Scream and yell at them on Twitter and about how the show is ruined because of them. The network keeps their engagement levels high, they don’t get as targeted for their behavior, and just keep moving along.

Just, please, think about who did this, Mourn the show, be angry, but not at the people who fought tooth and nail for this for literal years, not the people who wanted it more than we did, not the people who cannot say anything because of their careers and the NDAs they’re bound by.

Someone is going to spill eventually, but until then, we just have to wait, and continue to be loud.

#my writing #my meta #supernatural #spn #spn finale trash fire #MY MANIFESTO IS DONE

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trevor-wilson-covington · 3 years

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Twist the knife in my heart, why don’t you...

// This scene (slowed down to help see things easier) and Reggie & Luke's reactions to Julie screaming, the 2nd time, are really getting to me only now after watching the show so many times.

Compare that to Alex reacting in this scene:

Alex’s reaction isn't as visceral and he recovers more quickly to tell Julie to stop all the screaming.

Meanwhile, Reggie and Luke both move away from the screaming, either flinching (Reggie) or taking a whole step back (Luke). Like I know people will say that it's because 'girls screaming, in general, is scary and loud enough to cause the 2 boy's reactions', see Luke's comments about girls crying at the start of the Bright ep, and "not every reaction of theirs connects to their past/trauma", but it seems to be something different in this situation to me.

Let's start with Reggie! His face first shows normal shock, expected in such a situation, but as he flinches he closes his eyes momentarily and his hands go out in what can be seen as a defensive stance. Given the info we know about his parents failing marriage and likely loud fighting he had to endure at home, this reaction seems quite in line with Reggie reacting to Julie yelling as though he thinks she's going to turn on him or that she's directing the anger at him because he did something wrong. I’m not saying he was ever physically abused, rather ‘turn on him’ in terms of where the anger and yelling is directed as it moves from its original recipient. Of course he doesn't mean to react that way, seeing as they've only just met and her reaction makes sense given their current situation, but he's hyper-vigilant and it's a gut reaction likely resulting from that trauma in his past home life.

Now Luke moves the most away from the screaming and the joy or excitement on his face after he tells Julie "well, we're all a little crazy" instantly disappears. His breath seems to hitch/halt, his face drops, and his eyes are casted downward before eventually come back up to Julie’s face. He bounces/jolts back a whole step during all this from how much the scream packs a punch and how jarring/abrupt it is when they all thought they'd gotten the screaming out of the way already.

The reaction is less hyper-vigilant than Reggie’s, but it's still a gut reaction not only to something as scary as a girl screaming, but also to the act of screaming overall. I think, given the loud, heated arguments Luke and his mom had about his music and future, his whole gut reaction and movements are maybe reflective of Julie's reaction bringing back memories of those not so happy times at home. The downward glance his way of pulling back from the situation and avoiding eye contact with the other person in the ‘fight’/argument. He's taken back to the loud fighting with his mom and, unlike back then when he was more active in the fight and fired up, now he is more passive in reacting to the sudden screaming and shrinking away from it as to not make things worse. By not moving towards Julie to try to control the situation and get an upper hand, as he would have 25 yrs ago, he is avoiding more conflict, though not real in this instance.

BOTH Reggie’s and Luke’s reactions are so sad and I just want to reach through the screen and hug them. The fact that their first time seeing someone other than each other (and Alex) involves so much screaming and brings back certain memories/causes such reactions for 2 of them is heart wrenching. This could all be me seeing things that aren’t there, but after noticing their reactions in that scene I had to make a post to see if I wasn’t completely crazy and imagining things I wanted to see in the scene. I’m probably reading too much into it and unlike the other signs of their trauma, like Reggie playing with his hands when Caleb confronts them in 1x09, this is just pure and simple their reaction to a girl screaming very loudly. I just hope it’s not and other people might see it too and agree with my conclusions in some way. 👉👈 Let me know what y’all think!

#luke jatp meta #reggie jatp meta #jatp meta #alex jatp meta sort of #luke patterson #reggie peters #alex mercer #jatp #julie and the phantoms

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antiloreolympus · 3 years

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10 Anti LO Asks

1. Why is no one talking about one of the most stupid things we've seen in this webtoon thus far? I'm talking about the fact that H&P deadass pull a "I nominate Hades as an attorney to defend me in this case uwu" and the mf accepts (clearly the had it planned) although he is part of the jury.

Now, I don't have fast pass but I really hope this whole thing is forbidded by Zeus in the next episodes. It makes no fucking sense! Hades is not a lawyer, and as a god is not associated with law/justice (him being a king doesn't excuse this, he is there to "judge" not to defend the accused).

This really proves that absolutely nothing works against Persephone ever. She is able to get away with murder and have zero consequences for her actions, all while the smurf plays daddy with her, spoils her and defends her in court WHICH SHOULD NOT BE EVEN POSSIBLE LMAO.

From OP: It’s allowed because ‘loophole’.

2. I would like to add to what that person said about the characters looking too stiff. Literally that panel towards the end of ep. 179 where P said "I nominate Hades" is the best example of this. Wtf is wrong with her hand? It looks like a wooden doll with her arm extended like that. The only explanation I have for this (aside from the fact that the art style sucks big time) is that she's trying to imitate the art style on the ancient Greek amphoras (amphorae?), but even the scenes depicted on them had signs of natural movement, with the bodies looking much less stiff of course.

3. Anyone else wanna mention the backgrounds are also just not there at this point? Like she was already bad with this in the beginning but at least there was some sketch up lines to give the impression they were in a real space, but now it’s literally just blank voids of color and that’s it, and often not good use of color either (why is the above land pink while the underworld is blue? It makes it hard too tell what’s going on). There aren’t even establishing shots to at least give the readers an idea where they are and then becoming abstract about it, it’s all abstract and flat, which doesn’t help when the characters also are so lacking in character design and aren’t really doing anything pose or action wise. The world around them don’t even seem like actual places, it just seems like a set, and a very cheap one at that. It just ends up looking so boring in all fronts.

4. I don't know why it's only happening now but Persephone's eyebrows have started to piss me off lately. Why are they pure black? And when did they become so thick? It doesn't fit in with the rest of her fair and hairless appearance, it just looks like her brow artist did a piss poor job on them.

5. it honestly makes me sad looking at the first few lo episodes. were they perfect? god no, but at least the art was unique and had some actual thought put in it, but by around episode 25 or so you begin to notice the style is becoming less and less, until you have what it is now which is completely different, and not for the better. i know styles change and all, but this is a case where it got so much worse, losing its unique factor to look so generic and lacking instead. it make me sad.

6. Ive noticed LO fans dont seem to enjoy any other greek myth works, only LO. for example there's a huge overlap in PJO fans liking Hades Games and BoZ, and Hadestown fans towards TSOA, and so on and so on, meanwhile LO overwhelmingly don't even read other HxP stuff like Punderworld and openly hate stuff like PJO. They tend to only consume LO while claiming to be "big myth fans". It reminds me of Potterheads who claim to be big book nerds when they've really only read the series and nothing else.

7. its truly a testament to how bad the writing is from RS in that she honestly thought it was a dramatic twist apollo and artemis of all people were children to zeus, despite looking exactly like him and not like their mother. also, tbh, the fact hera humiliated leto and treats the twins like garbage, it is any wonder theyre being depicted so negatively in LO? theyre only used to prop up hades and p's "friendships" to eros and daphne. artemis is even the "bad" maiden. it's all so stupid.

8. the thing to me is no retelling of myths will be perfect, how could they be? but LO takes the cake at claiming its so researched and is the actual truth and is 99%+ correct (both from rachel's words as well as by her fans) with both refusing to even admit to any mistakes and refusing any critique, especially from greeks themselves, that's where the issue is to me. you cannot claim to be so well researched only to be upset when people notice the many obvious inaccuracies. that's not how it works.

9. there's a part of me that wonders why LO has never featured any MLM romances like poseidon, zeus, or apollo's many male lovers, but then i remembered she doesn't care about poseidon and both zeus & apollo are both evil to her, her made up WLW romances are terrible, and all relationships that cant be used to prop up hades and persephone are made cruel and abusive, so maybe that's a blessing in disguise that she's so bad at even remembering LGBTQ+ relationships, much less depicting them.

-----FP Spoiler/Mention-----

10. The whole trial thing just puts into perspective how much plot points go off the rails. I was actually looking forward to finally hearing from Demeter that Persephone IS a fertility goddess and them having a argument before the trial, but then it just left on a Clift hanger. And then oh wow Hades is being her lawyer, which??, pretty sure that’s not how that works but okay whatever he’s going against his brothers. But he doesn’t even make an opening statement because the other side does instead. And then Hermes shows up and his backstory starts and everything gets so muddled. I’m not an expert on court cases but seeing the witness be called up right after and the other side just make a bunch of shi up instead of stating a pathos but accurate opening statement hurts my brain. Not to mention the jury and people just speaking out at random? Like can Rachel just write something serious for once? Or at least somewhat accurate? Legally blonde had a better comedy court case scene than whatever this is.

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

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itsclydebitches · 3 years

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Hey Clyde, did you check out Wonder Egg Priority at all? The first ep is super promising, but the series as a whole is one of those real fascinating disasters from a story and a production standpoint that might be up your alley as a thing to pick apart haha.

I’d warn that it’s also reeeeal offensive and this generally gets worse as it goes though.

Hi, Phoenix! How are you and Cube doing?

Okay, I hadn't watched Wonder Egg Priority when I received your ask this morning. Now I have. In a fit of intense curiosity I settled down for a rare binge session and tore through all twelve episodes + OVA in a single sitting. It is now nearly 3:00am as I write this because I, oh so clearly, make fantastic life choices.

A question for you: what did I just watch?

The rest is going under a read more partly for spoilers, but more-so because WEP—and the summary I'm about to give, because I feel like I need to try and explain this to tumblr's faceless void for my own, dwindling sanity—comes with about every trigger warning under the sun. Seriously, if you are triggered by anything that we might think of as a "standard" trigger (meaning, not unique to you and your own experiences), best to proceed with caution.

Right! What the ever loving fuck happened in this show? Well, let's work through this chronologically. Two genius, frat boy brothers (I get their names mixed up so I'm not even gonna bother) are locked in their apartment and closely monitored because of Super Secret Science Research. Even though, I think, they're the ones who created this company. Not important! What is important is that they're bored enough to create an AI for funsies, thinking of her as their daughter and letting her name herself Frill. Frill is the perfect, cutesy, also genius child who has a habit of popping her lips — which the camera focuses on in an incredibly creepy fashion. One day Brother #1 (the hot one) falls in love with a random woman we know nothing about and Frill gets jealous.

"Jealous in a general sense?" you ask, thinking this show is in any way normal. "Like, just of her Dad giving attention to someone else?"

"No," I respond, patting your hand. "Jealous because she's in love with him." Which, beyond the subject matter itself, comes completely out of nowhere. Frill has a line about what you'd do if some woman stole your husband away. I, fool that I was, briefly considered that these two guys were lovers, not brothers. Oh no. They're brothers. Frill just considers Dad #1 to be her "husband."

So, in true evil AI fashion, she murders the wife, leaving only her newly born child behind. Who is a daughter.

Uh oh.

Dad #1 locks Frill in a coffin-esque hole in the basement and goes on with his life. Things are great! Until years later when the daughter reveals that she has fallen in love with her uncle (Dad #2 to Frill). She knows (somehow??) that both her dad and her uncle loved her mom, so if the loser uncle will just wait a few years he can marry her instead! He brushes her off, but the next day she’s found dead of an apparent suicide.

Realizing that this was somehow Frill’s doing, he marches down to the basement and confronts the murderous child they’ve had locked up for years. She’s now surrounded by screens in, again, true creep AI fashion. How did she get all this while she was locked up? Oh, just the three bug girls she created as friends prior to killing the wife. They’re devoted slaves, I guess. So the uncle says enough of this insanity and seemingly sets Frill on fire.

OH and Frill’s subtitled dialogue also puts “uncle” in quotation marks, implying that the daughter was always Dad #2’s??

Anyway, both brothers are now super obsessed with death and claim that they think Frill has had a hand in lots of girls’ suicides, even now after her own death. This is brought into question later when it’s revealed that they might have just concocted this scheme to try and bring back their daughter. I’m really not sure. Regardless, they use hand-wavey science to create eggs that I guess contain the souls of young girls who have committed suicide, then they sucker in other young girls who have lost people to suicide to try and rescue their loved ones in a dream world, saving others along the way. A tomboyish girl, Momoe, lost a classmate who admitted to loving her, but who Momoe rejected. Rika, a former junior idol, used and rejected an overweight fan only to learn later that she’d starved herself to death. Neiru, the 14yo president of some science company (yup) was attacked by her sister before she jumped off a bridge. Finally Ai, our protagonist, is a victim of bullying who managed to make friends with a single girl, Koito, who then jumped from their school building for unknown reasons. They’re all given the chance to bring these individuals back to life, provided they protect other victims of suicide by defeating the monstrous traumas that drove them to that act in the first place.

And you know what? That concept was great. However, the execution ranges from “Okay, that was pretty good for an anime. Kudos there” to “That’s the most offensive thing I’ve seen in my life.” Needless to say, unpacking all the battles they fight would take a lot more than this already absurd summary. Basically, if you can think of something horrible to happen to young girls (and one trans guy whose existence in that egg undermines the whole message of the episode), there’s an attempt to tackle it here.

During all this the four girls become friends and Ai works through her suspicions about Mr. Sawaki, a teacher at her school. What’s going on with Mr. Sawaki? Uh… everything! He’s somehow connected to Koito’s death, he’s dating Ai’s mom, and Ai apparently loves him too because her friends say so, even though this is never actually addressed and she barely interacts with him. It’s all quite the complication.

In time though the girls complete their “mission” of bringing their loved ones back to life. Rika and Momoe manage it first, only to find that Frill’s bug-girl lackeys have arrived to kill them. Why? Because that’s what Frill does, I guess. Momoe’s crocodile familiar (cute animals the girls were gifted to help them fight) takes a killing blow for her and the bug-lady then proceeds to carve up his corpse and force feed it to Momoe. Fantastic!! Building off of that, the next bug-lady who Rika encounters kills her turtle too, following in the footsteps of her bug-sister by, presumably, forcing her to eat parts of its head. Ai refuses to sacrifice her familiar to stay alive, but luckily the suicide she was protecting turns out to be herself from a parallel universe (that's a thing now!) and she takes the killing blow herself, which is done by pulling out the eye she’s sensitive about (she has heterochromia.) So parallel Ai passes on (again?) and the three girls don’t work through this trauma at all, instead becoming more traumatized through the realization that the loved ones they brought back no longer remember them. They’re alive, but the relationship they all had with them is dead.

It’s about this point that the main storyline wraps up and I’m relieved that there’s an OVA to finish things off. Surely they can somehow bring this all together in 45 minutes.

…25 minutes of that OVA is recap.

So with only about 20 minutes left, we learn that Neiru, the only one to not complete her mission yet, has mysteriously gone missing. It turns out she was an AI/clone/something all along, made to replace her sister and, presumably, that’s what caused the whole stabbing-suicide incident. She successfully brings her sister back, but stays behind in the dream world because Frill promises her she can become human. How is Frill here when she’s dead? How will Neiru become human? Isn’t Frill the “temptation of death” or whatever? There are no answers. A flashback finally reveals that Koito was having a relationship with a teacher at another school, he committed suicide, she transferred, she tried the same thing with Mr. Sawaki, he kept refusing her advances, and finally while threatening suicide to get his attention, she accidentally fell.

(So why was she in the suicide egg if it was an accident??)

Except, all this information comes through Mr. Sawaki himself, there’s a whole subplot about whether he’s really a villain, or if Ai is just making him into one, and this show might as well be titled How Much Pedophilia Can We Put into One Anime? So make of that what you will.

A dead character randomly shows up, but it's fine because she's actually just a version from a parallel world. How did she get here? Why is she here? Lol, it's cute that you think these are answered.

Rika, the character who cuts and almost committed suicide halfway through the show, breaks down saying how much she misses her dead loved ones, right after her friends refused to let her go on another mission that would surely end in her death and… that’s it. That’s all we get about her.

Momoe too, though she’s hopefully just vibing somewhere with that longed-for boyfriend.

Ai transfers schools and then one day randomly remembers that she loves Neiru and rushes back to start cracking eggs again because that will? Somehow?? Let her see Neiru???

When I say there are too many unanswered questions to possibly list here I really, really mean it.

Finally, in a personal attack on me, the protagonist with a name that is literally AI is not in any way an artificial intelligence.

And that’s it! Congratulations, you now “understand” WEP. And see, the funny thing is that the off-the-rails, bat-shit crazy aspects kind of catch you off guard? Yeah, the first episode is fantastic. In fact, I think I got through about six episodes thinking that this was a solid, if at times really messed up anime, but I was willing to shrug off a lot of stuff due solely to the amount of sensitive material they were attempting to cover (which is always quite difficult to do). Probably the only reason I was able to binge so fast was because the first half of the series was so engaging. The characters are charming. The animation is GORGEOUS. There's actually a ton of good here that is also worth yelling about. But then the plot comes in like a freight train and I was left staring dumbfounded at my screen as more and more insanity kept happening. Having watched the "explanations" I am now more confused about the show I just saw.

Phoenix, if you’ve bothered to read this rambling, 3:00am rant: thank you. I think? Idk if I should actually be thanking you or cursing you for tuning me into this, but it was definitely an experience, that’s for sure lol.

I'm off to bed now RIP the chance of having normal dreams ✌️

#mymetas

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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Ducktales: The Treasure of the Lost Lamp Movie Reviewcap! (Patreon Stretch Goal)

Hello all you happy people! And we have a special review today for two reasons. The first is that this is my second patreon stretch goal review, having hit the 15 dollar goal back in march thanks to my wonderful friend Emma, the same patreon whose responsible for the Green Eggs and Ham Reviews, who helped me hit the 15 dollar goal. As a result you fine people are getting three movie reviews each based on a Disney Afternoon Movie with Treasure of the Lost Lamp today, a goofy movie at the end of the motnh for a weeklong tribute to my favorite dogmandadguy. Extremley was going to be part of it but the length of this review convinced me otherwise, but I will be doing it this summer so keep an ear out. If you want to help me hit my next stretch goals do yourselve a favor and zip on over to my patreon YOU CAN FIND MY PATREON HERE. My next stretch goal at “OH Look 20 Dollars” would give everyone patreon and not, a monthly review of Darkwing Duck as decided by my patrons, reviews of BOTH season 2 mini series from Ducktales 87, introducing Fenton to the world and blighting it with Bubba before the 2017 series fixed him, and as a brucey bonus added last month a review of Danny Phantom the Ultimate Enemy. And if that wasn’t enough if you help me get to the goal after that at 25 unlocks another trilogy of disney film reviews, this time for the proud family and recess movie and the best kim possible movie, and dcom period, so the drama as well as Bryan Lee O’ Malley’s two stand alone graphic novels, lost at sea and seconds for you Scottaholics in the audience.

The other reason now the shilling’s done. is that the plan WAS to review this back to back with Treasure of The Found Lamp, to the point the orginal review had a whole thing about that, why it was delayed etc... but now that review’s been scrapped all together as something sudden and wonderful happened. After just kinda giving up someone came through with a translation of Della’s first apperance so presumibly i’ll be doing that as part of the build up to mother’s day, and since I still want ot do maternal instincts too, and already had to let the Floyd Gottfredson birthday special slide away as well... it had to go as I want to leave the only open space on the schedule for the lovely person who found the story for me. But this review is still done, i’m very proud of it so join me under the cut won’t you?

Behind The Scenes: Before I get into it i’d just like to note this article from SyFy Wire. It , along with articles I found via wikipedia citations, was an invaluable resource.

The film was an experiment: It was an experiment to see if one of their tv properties could bring in theatrical money, to see if a movie made on a cheaper budget and still rake in decent money, to see if a film could be made being outsourced to several diffrent places, and to see what one of those places, their recently aquiried french stuido, could handle this kind of work.

The film, if succesful would be the first of Disney’s MovieToons line, a series of films based on their shows. As you can tell by the fact only this movie and Goof Troop happened and the Movie Toons label wasn’t applied to that one it very much failed. While the film was warmly recevied by people who liked the show general audiences didn’t turn out for it. As a result the MovieToons label was scrapped, future projects with it were canceled.. but the stellar work put in by the french stuidio lead to it perserviering for several more decades and lead to them working on the Goofy Movie, which we’ll get to later this month but needless to say was a MUCH bigger hit with a much bigger budget.

As for why the film failed... I have two theories. THe first is that parents were stupid back then and didn’t want to pay to see something on the big screen they could see on tv’s. This is a stupid mentality to me as generally a movie of a tv show puts in a ton of extra effort and usually goes bigger and dosen’t go home. It’s a likely theory given most liscened films of the era didn’t do quite well, with all three hasbro films tanking. And look I get Transformers the Movie is cheesy and killed a lot of people’s childhood toys, but damn if it ain’t aweosme.. and also something I need to cover at some point. Thankfully this died out by later in the 90′s with Rugrats getting a hugely succesful if flawed film, a better sequel and a third one that was also a crossover with the wild thornberries.

And even now in 2020 we’re getting the Loud House and Rise of the TMNT movies sometimes this summer, we were SUPPOSED to have gotten the bobs burgers movie this summer but arne’t because Disney is being a dick about it.

And we got a phineas and ferb movie last year. With this trend hopefully thsi means we’ll get a Ducktales 2017 movie at some point since season 4 left a huge sequel hook laying right there to grab for a feature film. One final note: The film was conceptually thought up as a 5 part serial like “Treasure of the Golden Suns”, “Catch as Cash Can”, “SuperDucktales” and “Time is Money, something that DOES show as the movie weirdly has act breaks. In a feature film. Yup.

The Guest Cast:

I won’t go into the full cast since I’ve sung Alan Young and Russi Taylor’s praises PLENTY on this blog before, and I plan to go into Beakly and Launchpad’s actors when they show up in the pilot movie. But i’d be remiss if i didn’t talk about our three guest actors for our three new parts.

First up is Merlock voiced by legend and if I had a hall of fame, hall of famer Christopher Lloyd.. I need to get me one of those. Lloyd is of course known for playing Doc Brown in back to the future but has done countless other films, voicework, and other good stuff. Among his MASSIVE filmography includes The Back to the Future Trilogy (Already mentioned it but it bears repeating), Star Trek III, Who Framed Roger Rabbit as the pants destroyingly terrifying Judge Doom, The Addams Family duology as fester, a role rip torn would ironcially play for the animated series made to captalize on said movie, Hey Arnold! The Movie, The Oogieloves in The Big Ballon Adventure (Look everybody needs money sometimes okay?), and Art of the Deal: The Movie, which was not, thankfully an ego filating nightmare made by trump himself but a film made by funny or die parodying his terrible book and having Llloyd return as Doc Brown. TV Wise he’s known for Taxi, Back to the Future the Animated Series, Cyberchase and he most recently popped up on Big City Greens. How I missed that ep I.. do know as I haven’t watched season 2. Gonna fix that later this month. Lloyd is utterly awesome, a great guy and thankfully still alive at the time of this writing, so I was happy to have him here.

Less familiar to me but still known is Rip Taylor, a comedian known for his flamboyant unique way of speech and his marvelous mustache. He showed up in things occasionally and always seemed like the nicest guy and his passing in late 2019 truly is sad. He does a terrific job here but more on that in a moment.

Finally we have Richard Libertini, a comedian I never really saw in anything besides this who according to IMDB was most famous for his ablility to do a foreign accent. I REALLY hope all of them aren’t as horribly racist as this one. We’ll.. get to that in a sec as it’s time for the plot!

A Treasure Uncovered:

We open our film gorgeously. The animation is great in the film, having some rough edges I chalk up to the film’s hectic production, the studio being new at working at disney properties, and the film not being meant for HD. That being said a few rough spots here and there aside.. the film looks ungodly gorgeous. Like most theatrical films based on a cartoon it takes an already great style and makes it look great. It feels like a more fluid evolution of the cartoons look and it’s a shame we didn’t get more movies in this style for both this show and others, ESPECIALLY Darkwing Duck. Can you imagine a Darkwing Duck movie with this lush animation? Hopefully we’ll get one eventually.

So our heroes are going to somewhere in the Middle East. That’s.. that’s all wikipedia gives me and all the film gives me. As usual Scrooge is after treasure in this case the Treasure of Collie Baba, the greatest thief there ever was based obviously off Ali Baba from 1001 nights and that one Beastie Boys song.

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It’s here we find the WORST thing about the film, the thing that makes this a hard one to watch depsite otherwise being pretty good, and that makes my skin crawl knowing i’m a white man and a BUNCH of white guys, Ducktales series creator who did the voice casting for this character, the writers who wrote him, the direector disney them fucking selves who thought this was okay.

The film has some horrible steroytping. It starts with a bunch of backgorund guys surronding Scrooge, with crooked teeth and steotypical voices. This on it’s own is odious.

It somehow gets worse. Then we meet one of our antagonists. We meet Dijon.

This Fucking Guy

Djon is horribly offensive reminding me of other such luminaries in being ungodly offensive yet somehow getting put to film as Jar Jar Binks (With all respeect to his poor actor Ahmed Best, this is not his fault), Rob Schinder as a Sterotypically asian preist, Skids and Mudflap, Rob Schinder as a sterotypically mexican bandit, The Whitewashed cast of The Last Airbender, and Rob Schinder as a stereotypically asian preist. What i’m saying is Djon is an AWFUL, horribly offensive character.. and that Rob Schinder should be shot up into space, not to watch cheesy movies, he’s not funny enough for that, but instead to be sent to a satlitie that’s liveable, but also filled to the brim with spring loaded boxing gloves. Just tons of boxing gloves that feel like getting punched by a heavewight boxer all hidden... they could hit his legs, his face, his nuts, his face and his nuts, the point is he’s in constnat pain unless he moves carefully.

And lest you think i’m exaggerating for starters this is his design.

It just screams “vaugely but sterotpyically middle eastern” along with cowardly. The fact he’s also a literal rat is just the icing on the cake made of broken glass, shrapnel and broken DVD’s of Transformers; Revenge of the Fallen. They say if you eat a reveng eof the fallen dvd John Tutoro appears at the foot of your bed and watches you while you sleep.. and by they I mean me. It was a bad bet. I got rid of him with some insese and a bribe of five dollars.

Oh but that’s just design.. when he talks it’s MUCH worse. His voice is like if they took Apu from the simpsons and said “This but MORE offensive”, and his perosnality is WORSE. He’s a thief.. and not in the endearing loveable rogue way but he’s a pick pocket and a running “Gag’ is that he’ll often grab eveyrthing within reahc. As the deisgn shows he’s a coward running at every opportunity. Oh and to top it all off he’s the willing servant of the white coded, given all ducks in this series are white coded and voiced bby white actors, big bad. And the actor is naturally VERY white to make this cocktail of offensivness so complete that if Disney ever got rid of this film I GUARANTEE the republcian party would be running in with accusations of cancel culture gone amok and never shutting up about this like they did the muppets. Which for the record THEY DIDN’T CANCEL THEM, YOUR POINT IS ILLEGITMATE, THEY JUST WANTED TO BE SENSTIVE YOU GHOULS.

I do have a reason for bringing up Disney’s content warnings... most damming of all given just how DEEPLY uncomfortbale this character is.. there isn’t one for this movie. I double checked: There isn’t even wanring notes on the website. It’s just.. on there. And given just how ghastly a sterotype Djon is.. that’s not right. Seriously they DID put them on certain episodes of the show, theyk now this sort of thing is wrong and they done wrong.. but for NO reason they haven’t done so for a film released 31 years ago. Around the same time as the series and just offensive as that show at it’s worst if not more so. This is flatly inexcusable.. par for the course for Disney’s incompetence but still horribly furstrating, disgusting and shameful.. which has been the theme of the last three days really. I expect better because when it comes to putting that warning label on this stuff, they usually are better. First the scheduling mixup and now this. You already do a handful of things wrong Disney why add this to the list?!

It’s just draining not only to run into another Disney Fuckup after a weekend of dealing with one of their worst in recent memory, but just to watch Djon. To see this horrible caractrure saunter onto the screen and go on with his harmful schtick, to see that THIS is what Ducktales 87 reduced non white people to more often than not. It’s remarkable just how throughly and awesomely Frank and Matt completely and totally reversed this. Instead of horrible sterotypes in the reboot, we got TONS of loveable people of color, an endearing latino hero, a smart african american buisness woman who takes no shit but is still a consumate professional, and an egyptian HERO with an intresting story and a strong moral code instead of this horrible reminder that racisim in media was such an afterthought not ONE person brought this up during the scyfy wire stuff or in any inteview i’ve seen. No one cared. Djon was POPULAR enough that he got three episode sin the series. THREE FUCKING EPISODES. This film could be GOOD.. but it’s just so bogged down EVERY FUCKING TIME this artists interpreitation of what Tucker Carlson sees when he looks at a middle eastern person I had to pause to compose myself and had to take a break writing this review to avoid tyiping this in all caps and using the phrase YOU RACIST MOTHERFUCKERS every other sentence. And again i’m white, I get this is second hand offensiveness.. I do... but it dosen’t mean I can’t be offended other white people were so callous about other cultures behaviors this happened.

And what makes me feel worse.. is that I just sorta... never thought about white people voicing non white characters. Things like this I noticed sure, I realize now part of the reason I didn’t like this movie the first time I saw it was this alex jones version of a looney tune, but I do feel shame for not noticing or caring long before this. Sure I loved it when a character of color got played by a person of color.. but I didn’t realize just how deep that problem was and how LONG it went on for before the outcry post george floyd and the call to action lead to most shows still going course correcting. It’s why stuff like this extra botehrs me: because THIS was just as okay at the time. No one blinked twice about this and odds are the creators involved still haven’t. And that.. that’s just terrible and it hurts to think about and I still have most of the movie to go.

The Pyramid of Peril:

So we do get a gorgeous unvewling scene of a box Scrooge found out about from Collie Baba’s horde that should lead them to the treasure. This scene reminds me of Indina Jones.. and I bring this up because the poster was specifically made to mimick an indinia jones poster, to the point of getting drew struzan to do it. THe creator of Ducktales objected..l but I do not get WHY. While I”m not sure if he had yet, Speilberg flat out admits the Carl Barks comics were an inspiration for Indina Jones, with the iconic bolder chase coming from a similar scene in one of Barks Stories. Gotta cover that too. So yeah I don’t get not wanting an indina jones style poster when both were inspiried by the same work and it’s just simple logic and it looks so neat. Thank you.

Scrooge finds seemingly just clothes.. and a map. Jeff Dunham’s Most Racist Puppet reports to his master, Merlock. Merlock is a.. meh villian. Christopher Lloyd does try.. but Lock is your standard evil overlord wants to take over the world type. He dosen’t have much depth, or personality and only his style saves him from dragging the film down along with Dana Carvey’s most racist disguise in master of disguise. He does have a deent shape shifting gimick and being played by Christopher Lloyd means he’s acted TREMENDOUSLY. Alan Young was apparently in awe watching him work and that’s wonderful to hear. The guy did his best. Weirdly Merlock would show up in tons of other works, mostly video games.. but even weirder he NEVER showed up in ducktales 2017. Both Djon and Gene would, Djon thankfully renamed we’ll get to all of that tommorow thank god. I need it after this. But Frank has outright said they didn’t use Merlock because there simply wasn’t anything they could do with him they couldn’t dow ith magica. My likely guess is the might of found a way to revamp him EVENTUALLY, it’s not like radical revamps weren’t there thing come on, they just had way more stories with Magica and didnd’t get around to it before the show was canceled. Just make him some sort of evil god or something. it’s what I might do. There’s a lot of angles with him. Though I would’ve still gotten christopher lloyd back. I mean most of the recasting is good but he’s still alive and deserved a better shot at things.

So Merlock sends Djonn to go with scrooge as his guide to find the treasure, as there’s something of imense power within it. And I gotta ask WHY does Merlock need a minon. No really. This isn’t a situation like reboot magica where he’s trapped in another realm. He can shapeshift into any animal. We only see him use falcon, rat, cockroach and bear but theoritically he can become anything and bear alone is still a LOT. Why does he need this sterotype even other sterytopes ar eashamed of? The film dosen’t NEED Djonn. Just let Christopher Lloyd monologue and leave this post 911 propogranda cartoon at home.

So our heroes nad rejected jar jar prototype head into the desert, and seemingly find nothing before finding a small pyramid all while Merlock follows desecretley as a mighty hawk.

Scrooge makes the boys and Djon dig... because they clearly forgot the “work hard” part of his ethos.

Our heroes unveil the pyramid... and while Merlock SAYS he searched the desert and I get it’s hard to see thourgh all of that.. the dude is immortal, had decades to search and had Mickey Rooney there on standby to force him to go comb the desert. I have an artist rendering of that hang on

So our heroes enter the pyramid and it goes.. really how you’d expect: there’s a bunch of traps our brave explorers have to pass, the boys minintpret a juinor woodchuck saying about loosing your marbles to mean using the ones they actually have which geninely comes in handy as they trip the traps and Rob SChinder as a carrot stumbles into one. Also launchpad is wearing a hawaiin shirt and shades. This has no baring on the plot, but it does bring the movie up a notch in my book and I question why the reboot never used this outfit. Then again they also never properly used Donald’s Quack Pack Outfit (Which bad show or not, is objectively awesome), or his Quack Shot Indiana Jones Riff Outfit, so it’s not like there isn’t a presdecnt for not giving a character a cool costume change from a previous medium. I really should do a top 12 missed opportunities list for the 2017 cartoon.. the ideas for stuff are really piling up.

OUr heroes eventually find the treasure which has insidiously clever security the more I think about it: at first I thought it had none, just a pit with some... scorpions? I mean their supposed to be but they look like they crawled out of the same stygian hole in the sky Doofus crawled out of. And if your asking me “wait which Doofus” the answer is both. Both these abominations crawled out of a stygian hole in the sky.

But the treasure is on a platform surrounded by scoprions with the only way out being the trap filled way they came in. Unless someone comes in with a full team and a bunch of lootin sacks, they aren’t getting out with EVERYTHING. They can steal SOME of the treasure but there’s no way to get any signifigant portion... and the team thing itself is an issue, something Collie defintely predicted being a thief himself: while some thieves can work well as a team, hence why we have four oceans movies 3/4 damn good, and for the record 12 is the bad one, 8 is how you do a soft reboot and a female led reboot right, a good chunk of professional crooks will turn on each other or try and swinldle... and tha’ts dangerous in a trap filled temple but hey some criminals ain’t so smart. If they all were Rudy Gulliani wouldn’t have two razzies for preparing to pull his pants down, and have waved his phone around on tv like a dare for future adminstrations to arrest the shit out of him would he?

But Scrooge has his family so they get loading. But not before Webby finds the lamp. Not knowing about it Scrooge has no intrest in it, but Webby does. We also get a really simple but hilarious gag where SCrooge dickers over the idea for a second.. before Webby picks up a Jeweled tiara to possibly take instead. The best gags to me are often the ones that just let the character’s perosnalities take the lead and bounce off each other. It’s why when I reviewed the four lilo and stitch crossovers recently I harped on character interaction as their biggest weakness: it’s what MAKES a good work for me. It’s why my faviorite comics and shows often follow a loveable group of disfunctional misfits. I like a group of big personalities who despite in theory should NOT be able to work making it work anyway. And it’s honeslty what’s made Scrooge last so long: Scrooge on his OWN is awesome.. but iwth the boys, donald, and in the case of this series and the reivival Webby and Launchpad, with people to bounce off of who he contrasts heavily with, from Launchapd’s buffonery to Webby’s inehrent sweetness in both versions, to the boys genuine honesty and sense of adventure.... it makes him truly stand out. He’s a great character on his own, don’t get me wrong.. but it’s the people around him that give him chances to show WHY. A good character on it’s own is fine and dandy.. a good character with other good characters around them is where it gets truly special.

Merlock naturally bursts in and in a VERY Black Heron move needlesly outs what micheal bay sees when he closes his eyes as a bad guy... no really he grabs the guy with his talons as he captures the treasure and reveals he’s a bad guy. I don’t even get why keep Djonn alive. He’s done all Merlock possibly could’ve needed and Merlock is ruthless... this makes no sense and only happens because they need Djonn for later in the plot.

Our heroes barely escape, rafting out on the platform itself in a thrilling sequence.. but it’s the one right after that catches my attention. Scrooge utterly defeated, having searched for this treasure for forty years and unresponsive to everyone else. The anmation, coupled with the incomprable Alan young’s acting makes this the highlight of the film for me. Beneath the armor of wealth and skill.. is only a poor old man who just lost something he’s been chasing after most of his life. Scrooge tries his hardest not to be vunerable and both shows and the original comics all use that so when he truly is devistated like this, and i’ts belivible since this treasure is a personal goal of his and as someone who has had things that they seek out specifically, loosing them always hurts. It hurts to ALMOST reach a goal only to have it crumble out under you

But while this alone is good.. what’s next makes it great. Webby sweetly offers up the lamp. Scrooge turns it down, and her genuine gesture reinvgorates him and reminds us of who he is “I’ll find it if it takes another 40 years”> Scrooge may be bitter, mean and selfish a lot of the time.. but deep down, he’s a good man and one who will not give up, and a momentary setback can only stop him so long as long as he has his family to remind him of who he truly is.. and what’s truly important. It’s genuinely sweet and to me is also a reminder of why 87 Webby is a good character: Shes’ not perfect, her main personality trait is often Girl Sterotype”.. but she’s a genuinely sweet small child with a huge heart. It’s telling that while 17′ Webby is almost completely diffren,t and far better, that heart remains her biggest strength. Sure her reboot self could kill a man nad no one would ever find the body, but it’s her heart and empathy that makes that possible and makes her Webby. That inherent loving nature is what makes Webby webby wether she’s a toddler having a tea party or a tween getting ready to intergoate a guy with a meat tenderizer while saying ‘Cute girl stuff”.

Gene Genie Let’s Himself Go:

It’s a few days later and this is the point where it REALLY becomes obvious this was written as a bunch of episodes. Though to the film’s credit while it does ake this feel like a compliation movie as a result... it dosen’t hamper the film’s quality, condiment from Rush Limbaghs’ hot dog stand does that just fine, but once you notice it it’s impossible to unotice it. Weirdly though it seems chunked up into four episodes rather than the usual five, likely cutting down an episode, though I can’t see where they cut out material frankly if they did and i’ts just as likely they woudl’ve had to make one to fill in the space.

So Scrooge is in a mood, being grumpy with his secretary Mrs. Featherly, quackfaster in all but name, and having to be sent home. So while Duckworth goes to fetch him Webby polishes her treasure at long last readying for a tea party, something the boys roundly reject because their sexist little twits and swo were the writers or executies who assumed all little boys act the same. It’s easily my biggest pet peeve with the series as a whole: anytime this crops up with the boys it turns them into the worst dicks imaginable. It’s telling this, being mean about her wantin ga tea party with her surrogate brothersi s TAME. Normally they’ll say she can’t do things because she’s a girl or mock her hobies outright instead of just be mildly dickish. And while she dosen’t look much younger Webby is VERY CLEARLY, in this series anyway, supposed to be say 5 or 6 to the boys 8-10. 7 at most. SHe’s a small child and while it is realistic for older kids to bully younger ones, it’s not fun to watch. It’s why I get annoyed at all the big sibling bully characters.. some work, but most aren’t fun to watch because there’s nothing funny or intresting about it. It’s the same deal here.

Thankfully that quickly goes away as the lamp moves when Webby rubs it and does so again to prove it did move. Huey finishes it and we’re introduced to Gene, the best part of the film. Gene is a Genie and he takes a second to dart around before messing with the appliances in the kitchen, as he was last around during the time 1001 Nights Came About. Cleverly though, and so we thankfully don’t have 80 dozen fishout of water jokes that have already been done before. As you can probably guess i’m not a huge fan of time travel fish out of water stuff. Now from another dimensoin or planet, i’m on board with with Star Vs, Steven Universe and Sym-Bionic Titan being great examples of this, as is the comic resident alien. (Despite having the wonderous Alan Tuduk the show sounds way more mean spirited and misses the entire point of the comic as given by the author in the credits, i.e. that the alien is supposed to NOT be a threat and just be gently waiting for a ride) The inverse is also good with Amphbia and owl house, taking a human and plopping them into our world. But time travel stuff just usually runs the same beats of “look at the shiny thing” and what not. The only time i’ve sene something SIMILAR work is with thor where their society is SIMILAR to vikings time but still it’s own thing.. it also gave us a classic gag in..

So yeah i’m glad they dropped this and instead had a clever way around it: Gene reads the encylopedia at the mansion. Granted it’s Scrooge so I don’t know how current it is and given this came out in 1990 thus HOW racist it is. It’s not a questoin of IF it was, but how much.

But having caught up the kids confront him with the fact he has to grant wishes. This lamp runs on what I now realize are Aladdin rules: Whoever currently holds the Lamp is the Genie’s master, they only get three wishes, and that dosen’t reset if it changes hands. The only big diffrence from the usual is Gene dosen’t have to TELL them about the wishes like Genie did, and Gene very begrudginly agrees to it. He also seem’s phsyically pained when doing so.

So since all 12 know about him, each of the kids gets a wish though it seems unfair with HDL. Their one person, they shoudln’t get 9 wishes just because their brain is spread out over three bodies.

This film continues the weird simliarties to Aladdin by attaching rules though they instead come up as a result of our heroes talking rather than the Genie just flat out tleling them: both share the “you can’t wish for more wishes” thing, a common rule in these stories and usually only broken nowadays as a clever twist as the rule is SO common place, not having it is a twist. But it is there for a reason: to limit the sheer power of a reality warping wish. The wishes can also only go so far. In a nice line, when Huey, Dewey or Louie suggests wishing for peace one earth, Gene says “No pipe dreams’ He can’t bend people or reality on THAT scale. He can bend reality as we find out, but it’s smaller scales like turning someone’s possesions over ot someone else, warping the bin into a castle, or bringing inanitamte objects to limited life. Still HUGE feats worth of a genie, so Gene’s power isn’t so nerfed it’s unusuable, but it does explain why his evil pervious ownder Merlock, more ont hat in a bit too, didn’t just wish to have eternal dominon over the earth or something. Gene can do just about anything but he can’t change the world on a fundemental level.

And I do LIKE having rules in wished based stories like this, I chalk it up to growing up with Fairly Odd Parents... though they eventually went too far in the oppsoitie direction, pulling rules out of their ass to suit the episode, instead of simply having some very standard, very understandable rules that still pose challenges but don’t outright cheat so the episode can happen.

So Webby does her first wish.. and wishes for a Baby Elephant, something Gene is against as he prefers they keep the wishes small: otherwise he gets found out, and the fight over him begins. So one of the boys wishes him away. Or Webby does. Point is it’s gone though not before Beakly sees it and Scrooge smells something is up. Our heroes try to hide gene, but gene thankfully simply dresses up like a modern kid and thus is able to pass as a friend of there staying for the night.

So with the rules established and what not the kids find a clever solution: they simply go a ways away from the mansion into the woods, far enough from town to avoid any suspcion, and same iwth the mansion and just wish for all kinds of stuff: a giant bunch of ice cream toys, standard kid wish fufillment but it’s nice... in part because the kids treat Gene like one of them. Wihle they STARTED asking him about the wishes, this starts the bonding process. Soon he will be part of the hive mind.. SOON.

Until then though after using another wish to make scrooge not mad at them for coming home late and missing dinner, that night we find out Gene’s backstory.... and it’s an utter tearjerker. As it turns out Merlock wants him back because he’s Gene’s former master and as you’d guess.. it was NOT a happy existnace, used contstnatly to do horrible things with no power to stop himself. Pompeii and Atlantis were both directly Merlock’s fault and it was only Collie Baba stealing the lamp that put an end to his hell. He also answers the two obvious questions botht he audeiince and the boys have: How the hell is Merlock still alive and shoudln’t he be out of wishes then? The first is simple. Unlike pretty much every DBZ Villian whose WANTED to do so, Merlock wished for immortality first chance he got, taking the Zamasu route instead and thus leaving him free.

As for the wishes thing it turns out his amulet, in adition to shapeshifting, also gives him extra wishes becuase fuck it.

But the boys sweetly offer to protect him.

The next day, Apu’s Cousin let’s Merlock know the maps in the mansion and Merlock has him help sneak in with Merlock taking rat form. This backfires as Mrs. Beakley notices the form and chases after him with a broom

Meanwhile Webby has her tea party with Gene after he and the boys played cops and robbers earlier, and he’s bored.. though nicely not because it’s a girly thing, but because the stuffed animals aren’t alive and she naively has him fix that. This leads to

Which sadly is jsut scrooge vs a duck toy but admit it, you want that movie for Disney Plus yesterday. Call Charles Band Disney. CALL CHARLES BAND!

Whelp Scrooge Still Sucks:

Scrooge takes for a turn for the obnoxious in the next part, but i’ts fine by me as it’s part of the plot. Naturally this reinactment of Cult of Chucky has lead to Scrooge finding out about the Genie. To his credit, Scrooge is tactical about his wishes. As said by the Duck himself “I could wish for a diamond, no the world’s biggest dimaond, no ten world’s biggest diamond, no a diamond mind, no the MINING INDUSTRY!”

The sheer power this gives him is TERRIFYING, both because of his status.. and because unlike the kids who all wished for simple kid stuff and used up their wishes quickly, he both gets how much he can do with this and could conquer the world economy if he truly wanted to.

The obnoxious part comes in as he treats Gene as not a person, figuring he’s just there and forces him into the lamp despite the kids protests after Gene grants his first wish: Collie Baba’s treasure. It also dosen’t feel like the wishing nor him using the lamp to get the tresure back goes against his hard work ethos: for the former while he is getting all this magically, he’s still having ot use his wits to get the most out of it, and he did earn the lamp itself square. For the latter, he already earned the treasure square too and had it stolen. He’s onlyg etting back what’s by all rights HIS. Granted he plans on giving most of it up for a tax break but still it’s his by right.

However the reason his assholery works is twofold: first it’s Scrooge. While he’s not a TERRIBLE person, in the comcis and this cartoon he isn’t a GOOD person either. He DOES have a good heart and will usually do the right thing, but his first instnct is always to get more money and to be a cantakerous old bastard to eveyrone and everything. While he’s subtly grew out of “I hate eveyrone and everyone hates me” as his guiding principal, it’s still his defualt reaction to most situations. But he first relents by letting Gene attend the party, part of why the Collie Baba thing stung so bad was that he’s told the historical society he’d get the treasure for years only to come back empty handed, if shrunken. But he still manages to have a good time while Asok and Merlock infiltrate.. well I’mRunningOutofINsultingNIcknamesCanYouTell steals the silverware. Yes... that.. that really happens.

Look we’re almost done, i’m almost free of this racist mummies curse. Let’s continue. Gene sees melock and freaks and drags SCrooge with him and while at First Scrooge is cranky...

No but now I want a Donkey Kong Country crossover too dammmit. And to talk about those games. Another thing for the list. But Scrooge is righ tot be a bit surly...

Okay now your just pushing it. As Gene whisked him away without telling him anything other than vauge worries... but then he gets a full idea of why Gene’s so terrified when Merlock shapeshifts into a bear and starts breaking the door down. Eh, could be worse.

Gene shrinks them to escape and Merlock leaves thinking they fled but leaves Skids Minus Mudflap to go look for them. Scrooge sneaks out but bumps into a cart running from the photo you see when you look up stereotype on google. I mean I assume.. let’s try it.

Huh you know I HOPED but I never expected...

So Google Proving My Point plans to give his lamp to the master because of his weird Torgo-Esque obession with helping a man who clearly wants to murder him but takes his sweet time doing so because plot, and Gene figuring this COULDN’T POSSIBLY go as bad as Melock getting him urges the dummy to keep him and make his own wishes.

This goes about as well as you’d expect....

Wiped Out With A Wish:

Scrooge returns home to find Watto has wished to take his poessions, fortune, everything and Scrooge gets thrown in jail for breaking into his own house. We get two great moments back to back. The first is Scrooge lamenting loosing his fortune in jail, and realizing the sheer power and risk of the lamp, especially since he worked hard to earn it, every bit of it.. and Sam Wilson’s 70′s Backstory came in and took it all in an instant.

The second is Scrooge’s family coming for him, including Launchpad , Beakly and Webby obviously and bailing him out. Though Beakly is UNGOLDLY annoying in this scene, sobbing hysterically and adding nothing and it’s not nearly as funny as the film thinks. Turns out Goliath getting buried wrapped in chains threw them out.

Scrooge takes a bit to rebound from all this.. but eventually realizes something: he knows the security of the bin inside and out. He had it put in after all. So it’d be easy enough to break in. So they gotta break in to break out the lamp, undo this nightmare, and END THIS MOVIE. Seriously this review has taken two days as is I do NOT want to miss my invincible review.

So they break into the bin, and it’s a tightly paced Scene, scrooge going in one way while the kids go the other and we even get a nice callback as the marbels come in handy to get past one of the traps. It’s just a good scene. it’s only real flaw is that Launchapd just sorta disappears as does Duckworth despite the fact their in a plane, and the bin later gets turned into a floating castle. Kinda a plot hole to not have Launchpad crash in to save htem just saying.

Scrooge eventually does get to Djonn, whose been ignoring the imminent threat of Merlock while Gene sweats it out... and this backfires horribly as Merlock hitched a ride as a roach (Though there was a hilarious scene of him getting fried constnatly by lasers when Louie went through a laser hallway, as while Louie had the directions, it dind’t take into account passengers on your head.

So Merlock remanifests in full gets the Lamp and unleashes his wrath on Tin Tin in the Congo and turns him into a wild pig.

Not you sweetie. He then forces Gene to turn the castle into a fortress and float it back to his home in parts unknown. It’s a DAMN cool scene with impressive and horrifiing animation as the bin melts and crumbles into thte castle and the kids barely make it up the stares as they shift and disolve. Really top notch stuff.

Scrooge stands up to Merlock... and this naturally goes poorlyw ith Gene begging Merlock not to respond.. and Merlock having him blow scrooge off the top of the forgtess storm eagle style, though scrooge understands. And this is the true reason why scrooge being a dick didn’t bother me so much. Because it helps create a great contrast between him and Merlock. Both thought of Gene as a tool rather than a person.. but Scrooge grew to realize he was wrong and what he was dealing with wasn’t some magical goodies creator.. but a child forced to constantly grant wishes, in sheer agony to do so no less, likely so sick of it because again and again and again people used him as a slave to get what they wanted and to hell with what Gene wanted. He realized he was terrible for making this poor boy into his slave simply because that’s his job. In contrast Merlock could give no shits and is a malevolent monster who glefully uses Gene despite the pain the wishes put him through and his protests. It’s why Gene is the best part.. he’s athroughly likeable, throughly inncoent character with tons of personality and a truly tragic and horrifying backstory and Rip Taylor acts the hell out of every scene with the guy.

Thankfully the marbles come in handy one last time and Huey, Dewey or Louie snipes the lamp away and a struggle for it insues between Scrooge and Merloc mid air. it’s fucking awesome.. and it get sbetter in how scroogewins. He simply gets rid of Merlock’s amulet, taking it then throwing it. Grante dhe COULD’EVE used it for unimited wishes.. but it was too risky to do that and as we’ll see in the ending , Scrooge realized the Lamp was too powerful to keep around for much longer and too much of a tempting target for his rogues.. not that we see them this movie as the crew wanted it to bea ccesaible and thus kept hte cast to the main cast from season 1 and just made new vilians and a new supporting character, but still.

He does use his second wish though to undue the damage Merlock had done and the bin and clan mcduck are returned to duckburg in good condition.

Time for our ending, which is genuinely and wholly touching. With the lamp too dangerous to use Scrooge considers just sending it to the earth’s core, which horrifies the kids as it’d mean Gene would be trapped there forever... if the molten lava iddn’t just outright destory the lamp and probably kill him. But Scrooge.. isn’t the bastard he likes to potray himself as. Instead he makes Gene into a real boy. He gives the poor kid HIS wish, which designrates the lamp and undoes all the spells... so Merlock is PROBABLY dead but he does return for some games so maybe not?

And so we end on two things: Gene happily playing cops and robbers with the boys finally free.. and Birth of A Nation grabbing all the loot he can in his patns and running off. Ha ha ha thank god i’m done with this prick. And no I will not be looking at his ducktales episodes unless I have to.

Final Thoughts:

This movie is OKAY. It has a solid plot, gene is a wonderful chacter, the animatoin is pretty prettay pretty good, and the voice acting as usual is excellent, with Rip Taylor being the standout.

But as my paragraphs of rage shoud’ve made Clear Djonn is just BAD. Easily the worst character i’ve encountered in my year of reviewing and some of the worst writing i’ve ran into. And that writing includes a goblin man voyerstically forcing two teenagers to make out, making jokes about santa renaming himself Clem the sceneafter he tearfully confessed to letting the elves and ms. claus die, accidental transphobia via the u-men, and Bryan Lee O malley thinking we needed more than one volume of Julie Powers being around. This was disgusting, even by 1990 standards and especially by 2021 standards and it drags the film down considerably. Without it the film is okay.. with it the film is just VERY hard to watch any time he pops up. He made getting through the movie a nightmare and while I pause a lot becaue it’s a bad habbit I did so more simply because as I said earlier in the review I could not stand him.

It makes it a hard film to recommend. If you can stomach the racisim, then it might be worth it, but be aware of what your putting up with going in. But if you can’t.. there’s no shame in that, it’s carbombya levels of bad. Which yes was a real fictoinal country. It was so bad Casey Casem quit transformers over it. True story. So yeah, it’s an okay film, on par with the series at it’s best for the most part.. but Djonn just spoils it for me.

If you liked this review, like it, share it around that sort of thing and if you want MORE disney movie reviews, in addiiton to the goofy movie one later this month, if you help me hit my 25 dollar stretch goal on patroen.com/popculturebuffet, i’ll do reviews of the Recess, Proud Family and Kim Possible MOvies (Well so the drama anyway), so help me out would you and i’ll see you at the next rainbow.

#ducktales #ducktales treasure of the lost lamp #ducktales 87 #scrooge mcduck #rip taylor #christopher lloyd #launchpad mcquack #webby vanderquack #huey duck #louie duck #dewey duck #duckworth #bentina beakley #merlock #djon #faris djinn #movies #disney plus #disney

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mowu-moment · 3 years

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i feel controversial & i care too much, so here's my des rocs complete tierlist

ranked list & reasoning (ish) under the cut

1. WAYNE: hoholy shit wayne. can hardly put into words how explosive this one is to me. the intro sets a Whole Mood before swiftly (& cleanly) smacking it down into an Absolute Banger and i don't use the term lightly. very hard not to scream along with it. only detriment is that wayne the person is kinda an ass in the mmc video but that's no qualm

2. POS: basically the same thing as wayne (oh both have great lyrics btw, this one more so), only gets points knocked for being 2 minutes long and having 30 seconds of that being intro & outro. go danny give us nothing

3. WHY WHY WHY: there's a theme among my top picks--they're all hard-hitting w/ killer guitar. the lyrics are absolute batshit in a good way, but the chorus is a lil flat & i feel like in general it just needed a touch more spice to score the top spot. or maybe it's just seniority & it'll have a coup a few months out idk

4. DEAD RINGER: similar killer guitar & lyrics but this one is Groovy as Hell. don't particularly like his singing in this one & it's too repetitive if i'm feeling grumpy but there's something so magic about after the bridge. top 10 songs to twirl a flag to

5. NOTHING PERSONAL: the minute long outro irks me & it's a little bit empty but plays into that well. groovy, great lyrics, the Sexiest Guitar Solo of the lot, the screaming's a minus but it does have an emotion there. not entirely sure what one but it's there.

6. LET ME LIVE / LET ME DIE: his first time being all over the goddamn place, history was made. amazing guitar, a little worse lyrics than 1-4 i'll admit, the intro Slays me both in a good and bad way. must be a joy to play live where he can just drag out that intro & bridge as long as feels right. at least i liked it in the digital concert like that. would actually kill me in a physical concert, imagine how much stomping gets going to that beat. bonus points for presumable cowbell

7. PIECES: for once not this high for the guitar & lyrics, they're both kinda basic. idk what's about this one but it just takes me to a separate dimension & i love it so much for that. really fills those earholes. also a bit of personal meaning, heard it for the first time on the day we moved into the house i'm currently split-custody-living in (is that tmi?) & the first music video of his i saw. man i love some spaghetti on the wall

8. SLO: basically the same as dead ringer, but knocked points for a kinda lame outro & the subject matter being a little less interesting to me. still lovely.

9. HANGING BY A THREAD: not my normal fare really & the way that the ends of the verses don't really fit in the pacing of them is bleh, but it's just so reminiscent of the songs my brother puts on whenever we hang out together that it just makes me all warm & fuzzy. it's also nicely put together which is something i'll have to start saying for. the later list.

10. SUICIDE ROMANTICS: this is where i start griping about head voice & higher pitches in general. don't like em so the pre-chorus is a lil annoying. also not my normal fare but it's tender & the ending is awe-striking. imo better live where he's loud on that last line before the final chorus. not enough to bump it up though. shoutouts to love and a smoking gun, i still am dying to hear that one

11. THE PAST HAS PASSED AWAY: my favorite lyrics out of the first 2 ep's. only thing wrong with it really is the bridge getting kinda repetitive. love that last chorus heehoo. same schpeel as the Banger Category

12. MMC: this one's lower than the rest of the Bangers for being pop punk which is something the radio has made me dislike, i guess. that trope with the guitar in the second half of the chorus just kills me so much. improves greatly during & after the bridge, love that lil ragtime piano. generally the same bit as before but i do love him doing something un-romance-related. yeah fuck the establishment!

13. THE DEVIL INSIDE: reminds me A Lot of the electronic-ish cassettes i've got from the early 90's but that's just me. this one will probably move up as i get more used to it, but only a little bit. the first part of the second verse makes me like. genuinely uncomfy? but the second part of it's fantastic. ending's ass though what happened to the instrumence. bonus points for using 'reverie' that's an SAT word (maybe). good singing but returning to the gripe at higher pitches, just a little bit though

14. THIS IS OUR LIFE: feels shockingly generic for a des rocs song tbh but there's nothing really wrong with that. adore the bridge. singing's alright. kinda miffed that he doesn't pronounce the 'f' in the second 'life' in the chorus, but it makes sense here. that sort of thing won't later so i'm bringing it up now. guitar's nothing spectacular but fits nicely into the song, probably one of the most cohesive of his (especially in recent history).

15. OUTTA MY MIND: really lives in the same space as slo and dead ringer do in my head (most likely the 'songs to twirl a flag to' zone), but this is by far the worst of the three for when i'm grumpy. just. Very repetitive. back to great lyrics here but it's kinda hard to pick them out (i've heard the song at least 100 times by now & i'm still missing a few lines). still groovin'

16. RUBY WITH THE SHARPEST LIES: what the fuck actually goes on in this song by the way? not the premise or whatever it's just. so all over the place. the verses are incredible but bringing in another vocalist just for one line kills me. bridge is really cool but that one part i don't remember where it is, the one that alternates basically nothing & an Electronic Piano Chord blaring at ya? ruins it. partially anyhow. also can someone tell the people on genius that it's 'carved it in my skin' not 'crawled down in my skin'

17. GIVE ME THE NIGHT: same repetitive issue as outta my mind but it's not groovy enough to save it, shame. feels like a trial run of all the wackshit stuff he's been doing recently, with the additional vocal bits at the end & the kinda weird lyrics. it still has a place in my heart don't get me wrong but it's just fallen in favor of stuff that Commits to banger or batshit (or actually pulls off both strongly, yyy). oh yeah nice guitar alright singing etc etc

18. USED TO THE DARKNESS: similar story to give me the night. i love it i do, but it's just lackluster nowadays. also remember that under-pronunciation thing i brought up in this is our life? this is where that comes back. rampant i tell you! that second verse he just doesn't finish the words & i hate it!

19. DON'T HURT ME: i honestly don't know why this one isn't in D. the chorus bit where he just cuts it short is irksome. the lyrics aren't anything special. i don't know what i like about it. but i can tell it does exactly what it set out to do if that makes sense. respect, respect. and using missile in an analogy, he's getting creative with the vocab

20. LIVING PROOF: kinda got a vendetta against this one i think? i don't know why i hate this one but i do. it's just kinda, blah. like the perfect sort of thing to nightcore up. sentiment's lovely & i do love the lyrics even if they aren't impressive but like. it bores me to an extent

21. TICK (LIVE): separating the version i heard in the digital concert just to give it some credit, this one was actually kinda nice. another one with a nice sentiment & what he was going for is great. no clue what the second part of the second verse has to do with any of this though. and it also begins our final group, the songs that just feel empty. like there's not nearly enough going on. this one's alright though i was just hoping the studio version would add some flair. you can see where that one is though.

22. IMAGINARY FRIENDS: also got a vendetta against pop. kinda hate the sentiment here (contrast!), the chorus just falls short of what the verses prime me for, head voice is rampant, and yet i still swing along to it. it's infectious props to him. love the outro though, monkey laugh and all.

23. MAYBE, I: another empty one, like it's a four-note progression what is that. love his singing in it, and the chorus parts do round it out, but like. eh? it doesn't even give me much to say.

24. BORN TO LOSE: another flop on the chorus! too smooth i say! and i absolutely Despise the pitch-shifting thing going on. not something i was expecting him to express so points there, lyrics are nothing fancy to my Literary Mind though. initially good singing but the chorus he's just sloppy over it. the instrumental is lovely but the vocals just throw it so hard into the bin which is a right shame. fuck that outro too i hate that gimmick

25. I KNOW: here's where the bad batshit comes in. singing is some of his worst imo, does the other-vocalist thing for that bridge, genre i'm not fond of, just a soup of Stuff I Don't Like. not one i'd kill someone over putting as #1 like i can see where it comes from but. mmmmmhhhh bad. cover does NOT help his case.

26. HVY MTL DRMR: empirically i should put this one higher. but the chorus flops so goddamn hard it deserves to be in the bottom of the barrel. the verses are lovely for what he was doing back then! but then just... nothing!

27. RABBIT HOLE: i was so excited for this name but it's just sad boi hours playlist curated by some corporation you hate. probably the most nothing of them all, genuinely where are the instruments. what happened. was this one just shoehorned in as the final track just to pump numbers up. and i swear he had some autotune or something which only makes his voice worse it's fantastic naturally. also that's not what a rabbit hole is! that's not the idiom! a rabbit hole is when you go on a wikipedia spiral from jennifer lopez to group theory! not when you just have a shitty night's sleep or whatever this is! i'm not just miffed i'm downright annoyed

28. TICK (STUDIO): what the fuck happened des. how did you release this. it sounds like a 3rd grader singing for the school talent show it's so out of rhythm. singing's honestly kinda bad & the instrumental has the same problems i talked about in the live version. the last chorus is fine, i guess, but no i don't forgive him for what he did to tick.

#des rocs #yeah i forgot tphpa on the first pass. it's always at least one #i guess i'm pessimistic on the new album? or i just don't like his new direction? idk i just finished it like. today.#wasn't expecting to be able to rank the songs of my Favorite Musician & be happy with it but here we are #tell me why i'm wrong in the notes <3

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eggs-toast-and-daryl-dixon · 3 years

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And I am back at it again trying to count the kills in The Walking Dead. I am slowly going insane.

That's the link to the first three seasons since I thought the post was getting a bit long :)

Season 4

Character introductions:

Patrick ? ep. 1

David ? ep. 1

Zack ? ep.1

Bob Stooky ep. 1

‘Mouldy lady’ (she doesn’t have a name I think) ep. 1

Lizzie Samuels ep.1

Mika Samuels ep. 1

Ryan Samuels ep. 2

Doctor S ep. 2

Tara Chambler ep. 6

Lily Chambler ep. 6

Meghan Chambler ep.6

Mr Chambler ep.6

Mitch Dolgen ep.7

Pete Dolgen ep.7

Alisha ? ep.7

Abraham Ford ep.10

Eugene Porter ep.10

Rosita Espinosa ep.10

Joe ? ep.11

Gareth ? ep.13

Gareth and Alex’s Mom ep.13

Alex ? ep.13

Top characters - in my opinion :)

Abraham Ford

Daryl Dixon

Beth Greene

Eugene Porter (don’t ask why, I genuinely don’t know)

Tara Chambler

On to the kills!

Karen: 5 walkers

David: 6 walkers

Glenn: 29 walkers

Daryl: 6 humans + 74 walkers (1 assumed) with a total of 80

Sasha: 22 walkers

Zack: 2 walkers

‘Mouldy lady’: 1 human (herself :( )

Carl: 28 walkers

Rick: 5 humans + 29 walkers with a total of 34

Carol: 3 humans + 10 walkers (1 assumed) with a total of 13

Maggie: 25 walkers

Tyreese: 26 walkers (1 was assumed when he put down a Mika)

Dr. S: 1 walkers

Michonne: 3 humans (1 assisted) + 32 walkers with a total of 35

Bob: 23 walkers

Herschel: 5

Martinez: 1 human (spoken of but never seen) + 1 walker with a total of 2

Governor: 2 humans + 5 walkers with a total of 7

Mitch: 1 human

Lily: 1 human (assisted) + 1 walker with a total of 2

Lizzie: 3 humans (not seen, but we can all agree she killed Mika) + 4 walkers with a total of 7

Beth: 3 walkers

Mika: 4 walkers

Tara: 10 walkers

Abraham: 14 walkers

Joe: 1 human (killed off screen and was by multiple of the claimers)

Rosita: 5 walkers

Eugene: 4 walkers

Total walker kills: 338

Total human kills: 27

Total kills overall: 448

Total walker kills over all 4 seasons: 1033

Total human kills over all 4 seasons: 121

Overall total kills in all 4 seasons: 1134

Main character deaths:

Zack: bitten on ankle and face, then crushed by a building ep.1-30 days without an accident

Mouldy Lady: stabbed self twice, left to turn ep.1-30 days without an accident

Patrick: ok I haven’t looked at this in a while and in my book it said he died of ‘extreme Covid’ so take that as you will ep.1-30 days without an accident

Ryan: Bitten and put down by carol ep.2-infected

Karen and David: Carol stabbed them in the head and then burned them 😳 ep.2-infected

Dr. S: Was sick and turned (I think Herschel put him down but I can’t remember) ep.5-interment

Mr Chambler: died from lung cancer then put down by ‘Brian’ ep.6-live bait

Shumpert: got drunk and walked into walker pits. He was killed in between seasons but is only mentioned at this point

Martinez (another fave dead): Hit by ‘Brian’ with golf club then fed to walkers ep.7-dead weight

Pete: killed by ‘Brian’ and left to turn under water ep.7-dead weight

Herschel (NOOOO): Head cut off by the governor (brutally) then put down by Michonne ep.8-too far gone

Meghan: Bitten then put down by The Governor ep.8-too far gone

The governor (thank the heavens): Shot by Rick (non-leathaly), stabbed through the chest by michonne, shot in the head by lily ep.8-too far gone

Mitch the Bitch: Shot with bolt by Daryl ep.8- too far gone (lots of people going this ep)

Lily: eaten alive, willingly. Between episodes but witnessed by Tara

Mika: Stabbed in the neck (I think) by lizzie ep.13-the grove

Lizzie: shot in the head by carol ep.13-the grove

Joe: Bitten in the neck by Rick (walker style) ep.16-A

Alex: Shot by Rick ep.16-A

Saddest death: Herschel. WHY DID HE DIE! HE NEVER HURT ANYONE! LEAVE HIM ALONE!

Happiest death: The Governor. Hmm let me see: he tortured Glenn, assaulted Maggie, tried to get Daryl and Merle to kill each other, killed axel, KILLED MERLE, killed his entire army, was the cause of Andreas death (but who really cares), killed Martinez and Pete (he just wanted to be a good person), beat the shit out of rick, tried to torture michonne, and I think I’m missing something... Oh yeah-HE KILLED HERSCHEL. That basterd deserved worse.

Best death: Lizzie. Lizzie was kind of a psycho and she deserved it a bit, but the main reason her death was the best is because it started carols whole ‘mental downfall’ thing, which is very important to the story.

Worst death: Martinez, I guess. I can’t choose Herschel since I’ve given him the saddest death so it has to be Martinez. Personally I think Daryl should have killed him because of their betting game thing in season 3

Top 15 killers:

1. Rick. 150 walkers. 10 humans. 160 total. Currently alive

2. Daryl. 140 walkers. 10 humans. 150 total. Currently alive

3. Glenn. 69 (noice) walkers. 0 humans. 69 total. Currently alive

4. Michonne. 61 walkers. 7 humans. 68 total. Currently alive

5. Governor. 27 walkers. 40 humans. 67 total. Dead S4 ep8

6. Herschel. 66 walkers. 0 humans. 66 total. Dead S4 ep8

7. Merle: 32 walkers. 24 humans. 56 total. Dead S3 ep15

7. Andrea: 54 walkers. 2 humans. 56 total. Dead S3 ep16

8. Carl. 50 walkers. 1 human. 51 total. Currently alive

9. Maggie. 39 walkers. 3 humans. 42 total. Currently alive

10. Shane (go away): 32 walkers. 4 humans. 36 total. Dead S2 ep12

11. Tyreese: 35 walkers. 0 humans. 35 total. Currently alive

12. T-dog (hang in there, man): 32 walkers. 0 humans. 32 total. Dead S3 ep4

13. Sasha: 25 walkers. 0 humans. 25 total. Currently alive

14. Shumpert: 21 walkers. 3 humans. 24 total. Dead between S3-S4

15. Bob: 23 walkers. 0 humans. 23 total. Currently alive.

First (and last) words:

Patrick: 1st (yes ma’am) last (I don’t wanna yack on someone)

David: 1st (take that) last (take that) he only has one line

Zack: 1st (I was just about to come find you) last (Don’t leave me!)

Bob: 1st (Hey!) last (?)

Mouldy lady: 1st (wait please) last (you don’t come back)

Lizzie: 1st (Nick! Look over here!) last (I’m sorry)

Mika: 1st (one of them has a name tag) last (I love them!)

Ryan: 1st (it’s happening isn’t it?) last (take care of your sister)

Dr. S: 1st (got no bites) last (you’ve gotta go)

Karen: 1st (Noah’s asthmatic) last (I’ll see you later)

Tara: 1st (you look like you barley got out alive) last (?)

Lily: 1st (Tara!) last (Meghan!)

Meghan: 1st (Mama) last (it’s ok, I can do it myself!)

Mr Chambler: 1st (have a cigarette?) last (please)

Mitch: 1st (you know this guy?) last (You, get up now!)

Pete: 1st (they’ve got a kid for Christ’s sake) last (it’s a sha-)

Alisha: 1st (just messing with my knife) last (I’ll find you)

Martinez: 1st (say the word) last (yeah and then-)

Hershel: 1st (was he bit?) last (it could work, you know it could) 🥺

The Governor: 1st (save your ammo for when you need it) last (liar)

Abraham: 1st (well look at this) last (?)

Eugene: 1st (it’s classified) last (?)

Rosita: 1st (don’t do this Abraham) last (?)

Joe: 1st (get your asses down here!) last (that’ll be fun, won’t it-)

Gareth: 1st (I’ll guess Alberts on perimeter watch) last (?)

Alex: 1st (did they deserve it?) last (Gareth?)

Finaly we’re done with season 4. Sadly a certain person *cough, cough* Shane *cough, cough* won’t leave us alone on the leader board, but I doubt he’ll be here for much longer. Until next time!

#the walking dead #twd #Daryl Dixon #Rick grimes #michonne #Maggie greene #Glenn rhee #Carl grimes #Abraham Ford #rosita espinosa #eugene porter #tara chambler #carol peletier #Shane walsh #Merle Dixon

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kingreywrites · 3 years

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In what order would you rate all the songs in the Tangled franchise from best to worst (including movie and series) and why would you rate them that way?

That sort of question is so stressful like, I hope none of you expect me to have good taste or anything, I'm only listening to songs for the emotions they give me asgdhjdj also if I didn't make a mistake, there's exactly 40 songs between the movie and the series and it pleases me greatly

Anyway this is very long so read more it is (and btw since i cannot ever make up my mind this is far from a fixed list, ask me tomorrow and it'll be different asfhdjd the first ones and the last ones stay mostly unchanged but the middle is a big puddle of what i've been listening to the most lately)

1. I See The Light

It's very soft and very sweet and I could spend my life listening to it. I loved it before even watching Tangled for the first time and now I've got all this emotional attachment too so like yeah it deserves the first spot

2. Stronger Than Ever Before

Straight out banger okay, I love it so much and it always put me in such a good mood 😭💕

3. Buddy Song

Same reasons as above asghdjd

4. When Will My Life Begin (reprise)

Dude I just….. yeah this song always makes me emotional it's so freaking great i wish it was one hour long

5. Next Stop Anywhere (reprise)

Underrated new dream duet, again i only wish it was LONGER

6. The Girl Who Has Everything (reprise)

i listen to it and i cry what more can i say it's too sOFT

7. Everything I Ever Thought I Knew

Listen it's eugene's song at this point i cannot deny that i just love these songs based on what they make me feel and this one makes me feel a LOT

8. Nothing Left To Lose

Discovered the show through it and that part when they both sing at the same time hits just right 😌

9. Mother Knows Best (reprise)

It hurts but god is this an awesome villain song, both in the performance and the lyrics ;-;

10. Ready As I'll Ever Be

I love that song but I'll be honest I mostly love Varian's part and the chorus (?) part….. it's a banger but i tend to skip cass and rapunzel's part asfhdjdk (sorry it's still amazing tho 😭)

11. Life After Happily Ever After

Eugene's part 💕💖💖💕💖💖🥰💕🥰💕

12. Bigger Than That

Lance has the best voice all his songs are the coolest

13. Crossing The Line

The beginning between Rapunzel and Cassandra?? Unparalleled, I just. wish they kept going like this. Cass' solo part is still great but the beginning was SO good

14. With You By My Side

Very sweet and I love when people sing together asgdhjd

15. Waiting In The Wings

I do not have the same adoration some people do for it but it's clearly a banger, tbh the best Cass song even tho I've rated some higher here (but it's because there's other people in them)

16. I Will Make You Proud (reprise)

Can they start making these damn reprise longer I LOVE THE KEY CHANGE

17. I Will Make You Proud

I love itttt

18. Next Stop Anywhere

Honestly I feel it should be higher but I forgot so it's here instead asghdjdj i'm not remaking this but I love it (especially the Rapunzel and Eugene's parts because like. i'm me. ofc)

19. Wind In My Hair

It's stuck in my head like 70% of the time and i'm not even complaining about it

20. Through It All

I just…… love group numbers ghdhdjd it's catchy and i wish i could… idk, frame Eugene's "we all must heed the call" cause his voice is awesome here

21. Set Yourself Free

I really love Rapunzel that's all 🥺

22. Listen Up

Yes it's mostly useless but i love that song so much i can't explain it, IT GIVES ME ENERGY (also cap's moment is awesome gjfhfjgh)

23. Mother Knows Best

I'm all for upbeat and chilling villain songs, and Gothel's are amazing examples of that

24. If I Could Take This Moment Back

Okay I do like it and I do enjoy the angst but since it's like, nearly the only new dream duet in the series, I wish we got something better 😔 i like happy fun songs so much

25. When Will My Life Begin

It's such a nice song I know it by heart and I love it :')

26. The Girl Who Has Everything

I have Thoughts about this song and its meaning but it gave me the reprise and it's also very cute and catchy so I still listen to it quite often

27. Wind In My Hair (reprise)

It's soooo short but when she starts it up it's really amazing, it's just not that different from the og which is longer, so I tend to listen to the first one more

28. Life After Happily Ever After (reprise)

*listen to Rapunzel's part* *skip forward for 3000 years* *listen to the end* asfhdjdj Rapunzel's voice makes up for the annoyance tho i'm so proud of her

29. Something That I Want

Catchy, even though it doesn't really feel like tangled to me

30. Hurt Incantation

Literally one of the most fascinating twist of the series, it's not a song I listen to in itself but it's hella cool

31. Healing Incantation

Same, difficult to listen to it as a song but it's pretty and just… rapunzel singing it brokenly over Eugene's body haunts me ;-;

32. I Have A Dream

Group numbers my beloved <3 it ended a bit low on the list but idk i like it

33. The View From Up Here

It's cute idk what my brain has against it but i think it's the birds scaring me asgjdjjk no honestly i just think i have no emotional connection to it

34. I've Got This

Very plot focused song which is okay but it's just not really interesting to listen to it separate from the show, if that makes sense

35. More Of Me

A cool song but i just don't seek it out

36. I'd Give Anything

Pretty song but i cannot disconnect it from how stupid it is for Rapunzel's character arc so like, not the worse in melody but i avoid it

37. Friendship Song

I forget that it exists half the time… it really doesn't add much and i don't get why they made it 😅

38. Waiting In The Wings (reprise)

The only reprise that's actively worse than the original, both because of the twist and because the kid's voice just ain't it 😭

39. Living The Dream

I honestly don't care about it and Hookhand's an ass

40. Hookfoot's Ballad

Last on behalf of the ep making me believe that Eugene and Rapunzel were going to argue while singing and i got hookfoot instead. also it sucks

#thanks for the ask anon but genuinely my tastes in music are based on vibes and vibes alone #so i can't even explain my choices asgdhjdj #idk if anyone will have the courage to read all of that god asgjdjf if you did uh... u get a hug #ask #mine

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lonelier-version-of-you · 3 years

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roxanna

- Why I like them: She had so much potential. I always felt that right from her introduction (as a regular character) that she was really interesting - her relationship with David caught my attention from the start. Then when they started introducing her backstory in OMAHG, her potential amplified even more. Then they killed her an episode later. Goddammit.

- Why I don't: No fault of her own, but I guess I don't like that they never really bothered making her much more than a plot device. There were some episodes that used her character well, but mostly she just existed to have an impact on the men around her.

- Favourite episode: Either One Man And His God because she finally got fleshed out a bit there (and the casting for her younger self was PERFECT), or It Has To Be Now for the interaction between her and David and the insight into how she dealt with his illness.

- Favourite season: Honestly, they used her character best in series 19 - so even though she only debuted towards the very end, I'd still pick that series as the best one for her. She still suffered from the same problem she did throughout the rest of her stint (being mostly a plot device for men - i.e. Ollie), but at least they weren't trying to force her together with Henrik or brutally killing her off yet.

- Favourite line: "I used to say there were good days and bad days. Now I don't know. More like bad days and worse days." Four years on from IHTBN, that heartbreaking line has still stuck with me.

- Favourite outfit: Don't make me pick! I love Roxanna's outfits. 90% of the reason I am convinced Roxanna isn't straight is because of her outfits. Has anyone ever met a straight person who dresses like Roxanna does? I certainly haven't. 😂

But if I have to pick... I can't remember what episode she wore it in, but I liked that red blouse she had.

And the blue polka dot outfit from Keep Your Friends Close (I think that was the ep she wore it in?) is iconic.

- OTP: Her and David, obviously.

- BroTP: She and Henrik had no romantic chemistry, but I liked them as friends. I also think she would have been GREAT friends with Ange and I'll forever be angry that we never got to see that.

- Headcanon: I've mentioned this one before but it was well over two years ago, so I'll mention it again. Because my brain apparently wanted me to make myself feel even worse about the circumstances of Rox's death, it came up with the idea that her mum developing locked-in syndrome was the result of a brain injury from a car crash. Oh, and Roxanna was in said car crash too. And that's been my headcanon ever since.

Oh! For a happier headcanon, I think she went stargazing a lot in her youth.

- Unpopular opinion: She and Henrik would've been a terrible couple. Also, that whole nonsense the show pulled about John "forcing her" to fall in love with David somehow when it was Henrik she really wanted (despite there having been no signs she saw Henrik as anything other than a friend before...) was super racist. She was married to David for like 25 years, she OBVIOUSLY genuinely loved him and no one can ever convince me she didn't.

- A wish: That she'd lived. She could have been such a great character and they just wasted her.

- An oh-god-please-don't-ever-happen: Alas, it already happened :(

- 5 words to best describe them: I'll defend myself for being stumped on this one by pointing out that they didn't give her much of a personality anyway.

- My nickname for them: Rocket. (Came up with this one alongside my sister: the progression was pretty much Roxanna -> Rox -> Roc -> Rocket.)

#asks #anons #long post

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steve0discusses · 4 years

Text

Yugioh S4 Ep 23: Roland Freaks Out for 25 Straight Minutes

Oh man, took a break from the blog for a bit there because I gave myself a project to do that is 160ish color panels to draw by June 30th and um...it takes a while to do that, it turns out. Every time I’m like “wow I actually have enough time to make a buffer for the blog” I get so distracted.

But anyways, I started having some issues with my wacom tablet, my mouse is a nightmare, and so...I’m just gonna look the other way and write a recap and unplug all of the wacom stuff and just stay the hell away from whatever happened to that...tablet.

maybe It’ll be fine tomorrow?

*sweats nervously*

Thank God I didn’t buy a cintique, that’s all I’ll say.

Anyway, lets go back to Yugioh. Where were we?

That’s right. Mokuba is checking in with my favorite Kaiba, Roland, who is currently just trying to keep the company running while the official Kaibas are flying to California.

And I’ll be honest, as I was typing this I thought “and why are they going to California again?” and it took me like...10 minutes to remember that Seto dropped absolutely everything and jumped on this massive plane in order to beat Rafael at cards to win the title “King of Games” which...Yugi had already lost to Rebecca about 2 years ago prior, but don’t tell that to Seto. Or Rebecca.

Also don’t tell Seto that the “King of Games” title originally comes from being possessed by a very emo ghost that has a tendency to set people on fire with Russian whiskey and has nothing to do with whatever shenanigans went down with Pegasus.

Honestly, I like to think that in the modern version of this show, Pegasus threw the “King of Games” line out there as like a corny joke, and when the teenagers started latching onto it like it was real, he was like “Oh what?” and left it alone because he just got his left eye ripped out of his face and was very distracted by the large amount of cultists in his basement that he suddenly needed to let go.

But youknow it’s the end of the world, Kaiba’s company is being bought out by a competitor, one of Dartz’ assassins are trying to kill both him and his brother, but he has to go to California immediately to play Rafael while he has the chance. Not sure how Alister got the tip-off that Kaiba would be flying back to California so quickly, but knowing the Kaibas, they probably jump on a plane several times a week.

I’m just still baffled that Mokuba’s doing this over a cell phone. That he was like “I better call someone.” and instead of calling the Airline or the Coastguard he’s like “I’ll call Roland💗”

I’m pretty sure Roland saw that phone ringing with Mokuba in the callerID and was like “NO NO NO NO NO”

(read more under the cut)

Luckily for Roland, everyone at Kaiba corp has to learn how to fly planes in order to pass the entry exam.

For reals though, that plane just casually bumped off a mountain like it’s in Diddy Kong Racing.

There’s a lot of levels of brother’s saving brothers in this episode. You have Seto who thinks he’s saving Mokuba, but in fact it is Mokuba saving Seto by keeping this plane afloat. And then in reality, you can take another brother step backward and say it was Roland who was saving Mokuba who was saving Seto by giving the phone to that rando, and take even another step backward and say it was this Random Guy who was saving Roland who was saving Mokuba who was saving Seto.

So in reality, no brothers were really able to save eachother, it was actually that one secretary at the desk who screamed “JUST PULL THE LEVER HARDER, I DUNNO” until it worked.

But just remember that the theme of this episode is brothers saving brothers, although Mokuba is too small to really fly this plane, and Seto is too crazy to stop this duel and Roland is not really the secret inept heir of the Kaiba bloodline, and only in my little headcanon.

And also, I just have no idea who that random secretary is.

Anyways, Alister made this thing happen on the field.

Hey guys?

How many guns do you need on a tank?

Like I...

That is a hilarious amount of guns on this tank.

Like every character designer part of me is dying right now. It’s when you’re learning Maya, and you finally figure out the duplicate tool, and you just--you just strap a billion guns on a spaceship. We’ve all done this.

But like...this gunship has a face, and that face has it’s own tiny Oricalchos.

All I’m saying is that Alister is having a hell of a time in his Maya 101 class he takes at the local community college when he’s not busy working for Kaiba Corp Airlines or busy killing people for Dartz. I want to know what grade he got on this project, because in my Maya classes the only people who were this dedicated were building weird ass warships for their games or building intense 3D My Little Pony fanfic.

Here’s a list I can think of from the top of my head of challenges Seto Kaiba either quit or completely failed outright (basically the times Seto has NOPEd out or been forcibly kicked out):

-Joey Wheeler’s many challenges and also Spanish Class (as mentioned above)

-Beating Yugi in a card game

-Not joining Pegasus’ tourney initially so he could go on a vacation.

-We’ll just assume he’s only taken like a bunch of random college classes but only got an honorary degree

-Chess (like he was a Grand Master at one point but wtv, cards exist now)

-Didn’t arrest the Big Five or remove them from his mmo so they freakin died in there.

-Being the actual owner of the Millennium Rod

-Every time Yami tells him that they should be friends

-That whole story line where he was dating a dragon in a past life

-fulfilling that prophecy of killing Yami in the present timeline to end the world

-attempting to blow up his own battle city tournament before it was over because he didn’t win

-Getting all 3 Godcards

-When a possessed Tristan appeared over a mountain top to duel everyone and Seto just went “I’m out” and simply walked away

-Flying a blimp from point A to point B without it setting on fire

-Getting his Dad to build an amusement park

-Just anything to do with Noah

-the existence of magic in general

-every attempt he’s had to rebrand Kaiba Corp as “funtime games inc I swear we don't make tanks anymore, stop looking at all the tanks”

-Seto Kaiba’s entire Destiny storyline this season that he has gone way out of his way to get away from.

And like I’m sure there’s more, but I feel like half of Kaiba’s MO is that he is either Too Good To Bother With This or he has Lost Everything Very Dramatically. Mokuba at least has the right idea, by being one of the few people who has beaten Yugi Muto by peacing out halfway through the duel and stealing all Yugi’s stuff off of Yugi’s side of the table.

Anyway, despite it being like...5 seconds since we saw Roland in a weird cyber room in what I assume was Japan, we now see him with his head pressed against the glass of this helicopter being like “BOYS NO NOT AGAIN WHY”

And youknow, Roland was just trying to do the right thing, but he accidentally made things a million times worse by just showing up.

And so Alister was like “well I better crash the plane now with this gust of green energy that destroys all mechanical equipment.”

Really not sure how Alister was planning to leave this plane after this duel was over. I don’t know if he thinks that far ahead.

this isn’t even a joke I made up, Roland really did run up to the pilot and was like “Just throw down some ladders! That should work!” and it’s like...Do you not see the giant ship covered in a thousand guns right now, Roland?

And then Alister and Seto decide to have a fight about ethics where they’re both pretty wrong.

I mean it’s not the exact line but yes this is basically what Seto said, point blank, and I was like “well...at least he owns it.”

So cards happen, dragons get played (so MANY dragons) and because we had to end this arc, Alister loses the duel as we kind of knew he would.

And then Mokuba, because he knows no other life, sees an asshole older brother in pain and just wants to adopt him.

Enjoy that trauma tossed onto your already megalith sized trauma pile, Mokuba.

Elsewhere, the legendary dragons have started syncing again, which is a weird thing that they can do that none of these guys have any control of.

Mostly it just irritates whoever is holding these cards at the time.

But behold! the glory!

The glory of three tubby dragons wielding a plane!

It’s what Kaiba always wanted but he had absolutely no idea he was doing it. Will anyone tell him that he managed to summon three dragons to fly him around the sky like a mamma bird? No. No one bothers to tell him that his wildest dreams just came true.

FYI There were other stills of more of the dragons and the plane, but I kept pausing on instances where it kinda looked like they were humping the plane so I gave up.

But, at least we all get to meet up, around the smoke coming out the back of this giant plane that now...will just sit here...until someone sues KaibaCorp over it, I guess.

Like a soccermom, now Roland gets to give the whole frenemy crew a ride with...copters or whatever.

I dont’ know how Roland got here, y’all.

This happens a lot with animated shows, youknow, there’s a lot of plot threads, a lot of scenes and episodes that get freelanced out and outsourced, and people who make these shows aren’t working on the whole thing at once, they’re just going off of director notes--so there’s a good chance they had no idea that Roland...just shouldn’t be here.

But it’s OK, I enjoy whenever Roland is panicking in the background. He’s good set dressing.

Seto does not give any more explanation of this corpse.

And then, sprinting as fast as he could out of his copter comes Roland, who does what Roland does best. It’s this moment where you would usually see a parental figure reveal how much they care and adore their little children. But because it’s Roland, and these are the Kaibas, he instead takes this moment to reveal exactly how inept he is at the very last second.

Never change, Roland. I love this massive green haired disappointment.

Anyway, I’m not sure when I’ll get the next update out, since I’ll be knee deep in drawing art I don’t need to draw, but just know I’m not dead. Usually I post fanart or whatever, but all I have is this Dartz I started drawing but he just has so much hair that I don’t think that one will ever get even remotely finished.

But anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read these from the start.

#Yugioh #ygo #seto kaiba #mokuba #roland #yami muto #joey wheeler #tristan taylor #alister #tea gardner #S4 #Ep23 #episode recap #photo recap

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achieveandhunt · 4 years

Text

live typing extra life 2019

warning: this a fucking LONG post. if you plan on reading it all, godspeed.

i typed all of this as it was happening on stream so this gets progressively less coherent as i grow more sleep deprived. prepare yourselves. i may or may not go off topic at some points

larry vehemently vomiting pure malic acid. we’re off to a great start

what the fuck the soggy ass popcorn in that ranch jesus christ

lindsay in the song from AH the musical. i love her so much

jeremy going YAAAAAAY after someone eats a cursed oreo

matt getting AGGRESSIVELY kissed by larry

“this kiss this kiss” before geoff and jack kiss

geoff “i’m from alabama” ramsey

THIS FUCKING RANCH SEGMENT HAS ME GAGGING

jeremy “the alcohol demon the whiskey goblin” dooley

alfredo “you wont believe what the white people did today” diaz

DUSK BOYS DUSK BOYS DUSK BOYS GET THAT DICK ESSENCE

wait why does it sound like wonderwall

they look like characters from the matrix

the speaking parts. make my teeth hurt

in conclusion: they weren’t kidding abt the tight pants

okay everyone get ready for eric soundboard spamming YEAH BABEY

“hi i’m from broadcast and i don’t want to be here” they represent themselves well

also, let’s take a second to appreciate broadcast here!! they have a really tough job and don’t get a ton of credit. lots of love to all of broadcast!!! you guys are awesome

i am: foreseeing problems with this eric sound board

which one is eric?? will the real eric please stand up?? was the real eric the one we found along the way??

“i’m... just really worried that i won’t ever find love-” “i really don’t care”

WHY DO THEY HAVE THAT ON THE SOUNDBOARD (what does that apply to? whatever it is you’re thinking of, but mostly “daddy wants some”)

ooh someone’s about to get a fReE tongue piercing from a pineapple

god dammit i went to the bathroom for thirty seconds and now they’re eating chad’s chest hair

owie the shock collar and belly slap look painful, but drinking natty light from a shoe? that’s a true punishment

“and this roast was brought to you by meundies”

ah yes what better way is there to end a segment than people throwing up

“man action” oh no

THROBERT MULVEINY

K A R B is blind in T W O of her eyes

“my last name is cottagecheese”

I HAVE A PIECE OF METAL SHOVED UP MY A S S

chris has somehow managed to lose 23 years of age and roughly 412 pounds

“just open throat like baby bird” who the fuck is writing this and why is it jeremy

jon. jon you’re breathing in adam’s ass fumes

a summary of this segment: ass and cottage cheese

BARB IS HERE I REPEAT BARB IS HERE

“to fitness” -starts choking-

final fitness coach: tad, here to workout your issues so they can beat you into submission

“will you buy my wet” well i don’t see that on the raffle items

we’re back folks & i’m loving this walk around segment

moonball wall and gavin&michael will soon be reunited can we get an F in the chat

jeremy getting a borderlands tattoo is very on brand

what’s extra life without a little satan

“starvation army, putting lead back into paint, increasing childhood obesity” people in chat: TAKE MY MONEY

chris “i’m doing a different hole” demarais

ah yes. the game we all play in hell: twister

nobody edit chris getting mustard shot down his throat. i’m scarred enough from the original clip

oh fuck. oh god. the mayo. oh god what the fuck is up with the misuse of condiments this year

this just in: a human soul costs roughly $12,700

D̷̯͑̆̈́͝Õ̸̲͎̥̬͈̬̙͕̲G̸̢̧̠͉͚̙̲̙̓̔̀̇S̷̥̀́͆̈́̇̀ ̶̣̞̗͚̬̭̖̦͇̈́̎̈́̿̓̈́͆̒̋D̷̙̟̩̫͉̺̐̊̚Ö̶̥́̋́̓ͅĜ̵̞̌͋̏̉̌̕͝͝S̵̤̹̣̫̮̻͛̍̑̕͝͝ ̷̧̨̞̙̥̟̜͍̉̍̑̏̇̀̾D̴̻̮̩̯͓͉̖͎̘͐̒͋̓̉͝ͅỎ̶̰͓̳̥͑̅͛͊̒͐͊͘̚G̵̩̻̦̥̠̃̔Ş̶̹͚̩̱͖̀͆͘ ̸̢̢͇̻͔̗̺̼͖̱̏̾̔̚D̴̨̨̫̙̃̾̋̾̆̓̓Ớ̷̡͓͎͊G̶̱̣̣̰̝̖̰̗̓͐̐̊͋̀͊̀̕͝Ş̷̩̺̬̖͙̺̟͗̈́͒͗̀̑́́̕͠ ̷̡͈̼̲͈̳̫̺̝̈́̋͌͗̒ͅD̸̨̬̞̪̗̘̄̑͆̿̈́͘͠͝O̸̡̡͇͕̻͎͍͉̅̌͗̄͌̑̉̔͂̎Ḡ̸͙̟̪̞̬̬͕͐̈̏S̶̝̪̼̮̠̜̭̳͖̘̑

urine: to help with aerodynamics

jon: maya, speak! maya: *the smallest arwoo*

today’s mvp: any dog. pick one. no matter which you pick, you’re right

how the fuck did blaine change back from satan so quickly

barb as a cat is... my new sleep paralysis demon

blaine: barbara speak! barbara: climate change is real

#dogsforkids

this just in: extra life killed my wifi

we’re back & kdin is in the business of killing people with spice. she is the spice queen

queue six thousand well-timed 1337 donations

HOLY SHIT THAT’S COLIN FROM WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY

hmm “questionable liquids” is very... questionable

trevor: oh there’s four of them! we all get to join in the Fuckkkk

“what’s your favorite kind of candy” “any meat”

i like pickles and i would rather rip my eyebrows off than drink the juice so i feel for trevor

the only thing worse than drinking apple cider vinegar is shooting it out of your nose

“can you feel the love tonight” “i used to and that’s the problem”

“flubs every word man” damn, really missed the chance to say captain hair

jeremy not being able to intentionally flub his words is so fucking funny

OK BOOMER

wow i can feel my blood pressure spike just watching these shots

Xavier Woods is here and he wants to know if it’s Christmas

miles doesn’t know what a question is

WHERE’S YOUR HAIR

oh no. oh no helping hands is next. everyone clear a splash zone

CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE

miles bossing around chef mike is priceless

“you leave that fucking dough on the floor”

“you wanna slam your hands down on the table” *pizza sauce goes flying everywhere*

HOEDOWN HOEDOWN HOEDOWN jesus why do i keep doing that

“If Colin Mochrie is listening, I’ll see you here next year” OH FUCK YEAH

--- this is when i take a break so my soul can return to my body (aka i have work to turn in. college will never not be a pain in my ass) ---

oh god dammit i missed all of Always Open. fuck college who needs a medical degree

so... we have some very interesting things happening in family feud and i’m not sure if i like any of them

hmm. is now the time to get drunk

oily twist feels very... ominous

what do you mean you don’t remember gandalf having a taser in lord of the rings?

someone in the chat said “big stupid sleeping thing is what my parents called me in high school”

i think i’m blacking out what’s going on i don’t remember the past two hours

ah yes. voldemort and snape having a talk show together sounds exactly like something J.K. Rowling would make a spinoff book or show or porno of

can we just talk about how much shit chris has been doing this year? what a guy. what a dude

“coldy with voldy” actually means getting knocked the fuck out cold because you only got three hours of sleep last night and you don’t want to miss chef mike and lindsay cooking

this snape poem is summarized by one phrase: “that was terrible sit the fuck down” (sorry chris)

“let’s destroy a weasley” enter chad

fucking called it

“you smell poor” i need a caffeine drip

heh the wheel spins are at 69 heh nice

i’m a grown ass woman

welcome to a section called: we torture chad for your entertainment

“who wants us to kill weasley?” *massive cheers from the audience*

“wait weasley step away from the wideshot so i can masturbate to this later”

“i’m not gonna rub my eye mom”

oh they’re really gonna kill chad on stream huh

i felt that chest slap in my soul

i think i felt my own ribs crack

oh fucking

tumblr deleted my thoughts on the fanfic section

alright. fine. brief summary: my teeth are burning

my mom lindsay is on next and i’m so excited but i’m nearing the point of loopiness so things will go downhill dramatically from here

this is my fucking fourth extra life, you would think i’d be smart enough to sleep the night before

LINDSAY LINDSAY LINDSAY THAT’S MY MOM

JEREMY JEREMY JERE- wait a second... did jeremy get taller

oH CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE CHEF MIKE

i hope Xavier comes back next year because he’s funny as fuck

m y a t t

oh god the mcdonald’s shade i’m rolling

lindsay “who’s the chef here” jones

chef mike mentioned mayo and i involuntarily gagged

chef mike clowning the big mac. i’m crying

he made the right choice with ryan bc i’ve seen his cooking stream(s) and it’s nothing if not great content

i heARD A MICHAEL JONES

“lindsay you haven’t done anything but warm up cookies so far” “yeah and?? you’re welcome”

you know that classic snack. slightly warm oreos

JEREMY THE LIQUOR GOBLIN DOOLEY IS BACK

oh god him screeching across set is making me cry laughing

why does it remind me of trevor’s voice cracks in the one minecraft ep where they’re singing the lion king

the biggest spoon for the smallest shot glass

i just realized we’re not even halfway through yet and i’m scared for the length of this list i’m gonna end up falling asleep involuntarily at some point

lindsay no your teeth are going to errode from that shot in your mouth

well timed leet donation #1829495

this gorden ramsey bit is so fucking good

jack: what do you think of the arugala? matt: i don’t even know what you said

iT’s NoT jUsT tWo CoOkIeS miCHeAL

jeremy and michael just chillin amidst the choas is exactly my demeanor at any party i’ve ever been to

lindsay scores: ryan = 7 because diet coke, matt = still eating lindsay’s meal so it’s a 10, xavier = also still eating it so it’s an 8. total: 25

“deep fry everything but a remote control”

chef mike scores: ryan = 9 for no death, matt = greens are present, words were said, score is 8. xavier = Gourmet Mcdonald’s, food is edible, score is 8. total: 25

oh fuck it’s a tie

now they fight to the death. death = doing as many shots as possible

i think we’re all going to need liver transplants after tonight

no jesus please don’t vomit oh goD oh fUc k please- oh thank god

okay i’m making a part two this is too much

#extra life 2019 #i’m going for full 24 hours this year #rooster teeth #achievement hunter #jeremy dooley #michael jones #lindsay jones #jack pattillo #geoff ramsey #gavin free #ryan haywood #matt bragg #alfredo diaz #trevor collins #fiona nova #i regret everything in my life that has led to this moment

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jq37 · 4 years

Text

The Report Card – Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 8

Poor Little Rich Kids (in which Fabian Decidedly Does Not Get His Groove Back and Adaine Chooses a Nice Hill to Die On)

We are at the Row and the Ruction and the Bad Kids are in the fight of their lives, facing off not only against Captain James Wicklaw and his crew over the crown of the Pirate King, but also a contingent of elves from Falinel who have shown up to drag Adaine back with them and they’re commanding a huge air elemental. Not only that, Fabian is still suffering from two levels of exhaustion AND--due to his recent trauma--Fabian has lost the Champion sub-class and is not able to apply any class features. No second wind, no action surge, no extra attacks. Our boy has been nerfed to hell. And, to make matters worse, the Bad Kids didn’t roll stellar on initiative and they’ll continue to roll like trash all fight. And they haven’t rested since their last fight! Everyone is damaged and/or low on spell slots.

Fabian rolled the best on initiative but, there’s not much he can do. At Cathilda’s urging, he falls back and fires his crossbow. The elves have the air elemental attack and then Banish Tracker which is not great for such a banged up party. Gorgug sends Gilear in the Van after Garthy and then wrecks some pirates. One of the elves casts Flesh to Stone on Adaine and she fails her save. She begins petrifying and has to roll death-like saves to keep from turning fully to stone. Cathilda gets a Nat 20 on one of her attacks and slices a tentacle off of Captain Wicklaw. Sandra-Lynn and Ragh also do well on their turns.

Everyone but Riz (who is hiding in the rafters) has to make an Int save against Captain Wicklaw’s psionic hate blast and all of the PC’s fail and are stunned which means they can't move, can only barely speak (hindering even vocal only spells), and have attacks taken against them with advantage. They also auto fail Strength and Dex saves. Not a good condition to have at any time, but especially now.

After some attacks, the pirates are badly injured but not badly enough for the Bad Kids to have any comfort. Adaine makes her save to become unstunned but then rolls a Nat 1 on the petrification save. Riz shoots from the rafters to try and break the concentration of the elf who banished Tracker but she rolls exactly what she needs to save. Wicklaw takes a legendary action (because of course this dude has a legendary action, he’s a MINDFLAYER) and shoots Fabian before teleporting up to the Ruction. Fabian rolls a Nat 1 on his save for being stunned. Siobhan stages an impromptu Baptism for Lou’s dice irl.

The elves’ elemental grabs Adaine and bring her up to the Ruction. Fig gives Adaine some Bardic. And then, plot twist! Adaine’s DAD (Anguin Abernant) drops Greater Invisibility and casts Dominate Person on Adaine. Adaine makes her Wisdom save (with a +6 mod and advantage plus her Bardic from Fig) and tells her dad to go to hell.

Fig (who is at 9 HP at this point) gets attacked by a pirate and drops to zero, taking down a pirate with her with a Hellish Rebuke. Gorgug, the tank, is at 5 HP. Yeah, it’s that bad. With Cathilda’s help, Gorgug finally snaps out of his stunned condition. Sandra-Lynn brings Fig back up. Wicklaw shoots Fabian. Adaine fails a petrification save but makes her stun save. Then, she takes a Misty Step away from the elemental that has her. Riz tries to steal the crown from Wicklaw and fails but, luckily, Wicklaw fails on his retaliatory attack. Fabian and Kristen continue to fail their stun saves.

The air elemental grabs Adaine again. Fig Dimension Doors herself and Gorgug to where Adaine is and gives her Bardic. Anguin tries to Dominate Person on Adaine again and also to guilt trip her. Adaine makes the save, easy, and sidesteps the parental guilt trip even easier. A bunch of pirates have made it into the Ruction, Sandra-Lynn is looking bad and Kristen is at 3 HP. Things are looking bad. Real bad.

Which is why one of the elves offers Adaine a choice. Teleportation only works on a willing creature. If Adaine allows herself to be teleported to Falinel, the elves will stop helping Wicklaw and give her friends a fighting chance. Even though she technically has two options, Adaine only sees one. She’s defiant as ever but she goes with the elves. They poof away but, as they do, Adaine makes a petrification save (again, with Fig’s Bardic) and the casts Sending to tell Ayda that her friends are being attacked and ask for help. She gets a reply: “Your friends are my friends.” Ayda’s on her way.

Gorgug does a bunch of damage on Wicklaw and goes down, but pops back up to 1 HP with Relentless Endurance. Cathilda kills some pirates then stays close to the still stunned Fabian to guard him. Wicklaw stuns Gorgug again, puts him in a grapple, and gets ready to eat his brains. Riz blasts an already badly injured Wicklaw for 25 damage. Kristen and Fabian fail their stun saves AGAIN. Fig fails her attack on Wicklaw but heals Gorgug for a few points.

Sandra-Lynn rushes Wicklaw and knocks him out of the Ruction and into the Row (freeing Gorgug from his grapple) but then Wicklaw stabs her and she goes down. Riz hides and then shoots with a Nat 20! 47 damage! Wicklaw goes down...but we find that he’s not completely out when Riz runs to grab the crown and gets shot at point blank range and then slashed with Wicklaw’s saber. He drops and falls into the Row next to Sandra-Lynn, taking two death save fails from getting trampled. Emily weighs her in game loyalty to her mom against her out of game loyalty to Murph and then heals Sandra-Lynn. Then she and Gorgug tag-team the final chunk of damage and kill his ass. FINALLY. Fig also steals his soul because, why not? With Wicklaw dead, the pirates not affiliated with him quickly beat the tar out of the rest of his men and the gang take his hate-sword (which Fig gets later).

Tracker pops out of Banishment and passes out heals. Ragh and Cathilda snap Kristen and Fabian out of being stunned. Cathilda tries to comfort Fabian but he’s still feeling awful about Cathilda being forced to babysit him and him not being able to help Riz. Riz tries to give him a pep talk (eliciting probably the *second* saddest Hoot-Growl to date) but it doesn’t seem to stick. Fig, confusingly paranoid, insight checks Cathilda (finding nothing suspicious that she’s not making up in her own head). Jemina Joy shows up and informs everyone that Gilear has crashed the Van because Of Course he has.

Riz asks Fabian what they should do with the Pirate King crown but he’s still uncharacteristically indecisive, deferring to Cathilda who suggests they mount the crown on Wicklaw’s head in Gibbety Square where the old one was. They do so. Then, they debate whether they should take a rest before going after Adaine and decide going after her ASAP is the best move, especially considering she sacrificed herself for them. Ayda agrees to teleport everyone to Falinel but first, they head back to the Gold Gardens to regroup.

Gorgug takes Fabian aside to tell him that it’s OK that he didn’t get to be the hero this fight because that’s the whole point of being on a team but also that he needs to get it together for Adaine’s sake. Kristen also pulls Fabian aside (either before or after she and Tracker have a poorly times tryst upstairs) and tells him that, as the Queen of Being a Hot Mess, it’s OK for him to be a Hot Mess for a bit while he’s figuring things out because the party will have his back. She also apologizes for comparing him to Gilear. Then Gilear pulls Fabian aside and--nah, he doesn’t have a pep talk lined up. He needs money to pay someone off. Fabian gives him the gold.

Once everyone (sans Adaine, of course) gets back together, Jemina Joy tells them that they’re welcome back any time. Garthy asks where specifically they want to go since Falinel is a big country. Because of the way Adaine was taken, their best guess for where she is is wherever Aelwyn is being held. They consult the dossier which says she’s being held in Calethiel Tower. Teleporting there is a no-go because of the heavy security but there are a number of adjoining provinces, one of which (the land of the Lomenelda) is actually where Fabian’s mom is from. They decide to poof in there. As they go (Ayda included, she’s not just sending them), Tracker (and Gilear for that matter) notices a strange, loaded goodbye between Garthy and Sandra-Lynn. What’s that about, asks Tracker. Uh, let’s put a pin in that, Kristen replies.

Back with Adaine (who is now fully clear of petrification), she has been teleported to a very nice courtyard with these elven wizards and her dad. Her dad and one of the elves (whose name sounds like Kier to me but who the hell knows between the weird spelling and the low, breathy, elven talking) stay with her. Kier tells Adaine she made a noble choice but Adaine isn’t having it. She tries to Misty Step out of the room and her dad dispels her magic. She casts Greater Invisibility of herself. Boom, dispelled by Kier. Adaine refuses them even an inch of cooperation or cordiality, even when they volunteer the information that her friends made it out of the fight. Kier leaves Adaine alone with her dad and Adaine, again, absolutely refuses to play ball (don’t worry, I’m skimming because I’m coming back to this). Anguin tells Adaine to stop being obstinate. Falinel will have an oracle. And if they don’t have one, they will make one. Fine, says Adaine, with no pause at all. Kill me. Adaine is determined to be a thorn in her fathers’ side for the rest of her life and death if it comes to that. Anguin finds her response more annoying than actually frustrating and leaves.

An elf comes to take Adaine to her room but she does the little kid thing of lying down and refusing to engage so he handcuffs her instead and drags her away and up the tower. On the way up, she sees a beautiful marble chamber with a 15 ft diameter glass orb that is slightly rotating. Inside is Aelwyn, on her hands and knees, crawling as it rotates. Aelwyn doesn’t notice her but Adaine can tell she’s been kept from trancing for almost a year and is extremely “trance-deprived”.

Kier and Anguin come back in as Adaine hides under the blankets. On a failed Wis save, Kier lands a detect thoughts on her. Kier asks Adaine about the last time she saw her mom. Adaine doesn’t answer but runs into the “Don’t think about a pink elephant,” problem. Her thoughts betray her, even as she remains tight-lipped. As she’s being interrogated, she sees the stars through a window and can tell, more or less, where in Falinel she is (which could be helpful once she can cast Sending again).

One last question for Adaine: Is she going to start cooperating or is she going to keep being a pain in their ass?

Take a wild guess at which option she picks.

She picks the hard way. Fine, says Kier. Put her in a trance-deprivation Torture-Orb. Because F the Fantasy Geneva Convention I guess.

Detention

Anguin for Being an Absolute Sunuvabitch and the WORST Father in the Kingdom and Any Other

I’m not giving him the dignity of more than a single sentence devoted to him so there.

Honor Roll

Adaine for So Much

My Girl!

Adaine was on fire this episode, starting with the long overdue confrontation with her father. When he dropped Invisibility to try to Dominate Person her, I felt my stomach drop. Losing control of your character sucks in general but, in the context of Adaine’s relationship with her dad, it would have been that much more painful a loss, but she resisted like a champ both times!

Then, as I suspected might happen, she was given the opportunity to surrender to give her friends a better chance, and she took it without question. She didn’t even consider it a choice. She willingly walked into basically her worst case scenario, and not even for a guarantee at their safety. For a chance. To maybe turn the tide. She gave herself up for any advantage she could give them.

And THEN, when she cast Sending to Ayda--a SUPER clutch move by the way--she didn’t even say, “Hey, help me please.” She didn’t say anything about herself at all. She said, “My friends are in danger. Please help them.” And, because Adaine put the effort into building that bridge and making that friend last episode, even though she didn’t have to--they already had what they needed at that point--Ayda says yes. “Your friends are my friends.”

And, here’s the thing. Adaine isn’t stupid. She’s very much the opposite of that. I mentioned last recap that Adaine was potentially putting herself in dangerous waters by not cooperating seeing as Falinel could kill her to trigger a new elven Oracle being selected. I was concerned she might not have thought about that. Oh, no. She’s thought about it. She just doesn’t give a single damn. She is being obstinate in the face of her potential demise. She went with them, fully aware that her death was on the table. And, then, she proceeded to be as difficult a prisoner as she was capable of being.

And, I have to give major, major, major props to Siobhan. In my opinion, one of her biggest strengths an an RP-er (besides being one of the Keepers of the Party Brain Cells) is her ability to string words together on the fly in just the most perfect way. Like her speech to the American Dream in Unsleeping City? She gave a small pause and then the exact perfect combination of words fell out of her mouth, like magic. But it wasn’t, she’s just that good. And that’s how I felt in this episode too. The second she was alone with Anguin, I thought, “Alright Siobhan, showtime.” And she delivered, as always. She went ALL the way back. It wasn’t, “I can’t believe you kidnapped me just now.” It was, “You abandoned me.” OF COURSE, that’s where Adaine would start. OF COURSE, she’s still raw about that. OF COURSE she wants to talk about her shitty childhood. But it wasn’t the meek, broken, childish tone from Promocalypse. This was cold, and hardened, and defiant to the core. Anguin hinting at her possible death and her basically spitting it back in his face was such a power move. Absolutely outstanding. And then her final line: “That unfinished business will remain unfinished because there is no level of an annoyance to you that will be satisfying to the ghost of me.” That sentence is constructed in such a way that it would have been very easy to trip over but Siobhan delivered it flawlessly and stuck the landing for maximum impact.

Bravo to Adaine for being put in a situation that would have had her rolling for panic attacks in S1 and, instead, helping her friends and standing her ground.

Random Thoughts

Apologies that my fight play-by-play isn’t exact. People were getting stunned and unstunned all over the place and it was hard to keep track. Trust me, the details are less important than the fact that everyone had a bad time.

We got new character art for Fabian and Cathilda here.

Brennan, channel Big Cubby Energy: All laws are actually just structured threats.

What are the kids supposed to do for the last 2-3 months of school? Also, I ask again, are all of the quests going on at Aguefort right now this personal and entwined with emotional baggage? Or is it just the Bad Kids being forced to fight their family members and dead families' enemies and the like?

“Friends don’t let friends’ brains get eaten by their fathers’ mortal enemies.”

More than anyone, Emily was LIVING for Lou’s choice to nerf Fabian. Game respects game.

Also, the mild panic and then relief from Emily when Zac said that he called for Gilear...to get in the Van and go get Garthy was so funny. Mark my words, Emily is going to die for an NPC eventually. It might be in NADDPOD, it might be in D20, but it’s gonna happen.

That bit where Adaine is like, “We can hear your music through your headphones,” and Gorgug is like, Oh no! Relatable.

This was yet another fight where, after it was over, I was like, “I can’t believe all this happened in like 45 seconds of game time.” I mean, we had people dying or almost dying multiple times, they lost two party members (one for real), they were getting hit with so many status conditions, it was a whirlwind of a fight. And also a good example of how bad initiative can totally screw you.

Having both healers incapacitated all fight also really screwed them. If they hadn’t both been down and could have provided some buffs, thrown up Spirit Guardians, and healed, that could have been an enormous help. Of course, I get the sense the elves could have thrown down a lot harder than they did if they’d had to, but it still would have been better to have at least one functioning cleric.

And then the lack of rest between this fight and the last. RIP them.

Even though they spent most of the fight getting womped, I didn’t feel the energy drop that I did during some of the other hard fights they had. Everyone was still obviously having a good time, which is great because it makes it more fun for us as the audience.

Fig: I’m kind of a closed book.

Also Fig, Midfight to Adaine: Love you girl!

Also Fig, Upon Being Given Permission to do an AoE Attack the Would hit Adaine: NOOOO!

Also Fig, Distraught: I used my everything to try and save you!

Also Fig, Who Knows the NK can and Has Controlled People, specifically Her and Ragh: The Nightmare King could be anyone except my six friends.

Man, Ally invoked their nat20 summoning powers a bunch this ep but it just wasn’t happening. The dice really were not on the party’s side at all this ep.

Like Emily, I thought for a sec at the end of the fight that Brennan was saying Anguin was left behind, not referring to Gilear. I would have LOVED to see the crew gang up on him post-fight. Remember when Riz was interrogating Biz and started blasting off fingers? Good times.

I also low key thought Fig was gonna do something to torture Wicklaw’s soul. I’ve been trying to figure out why she can do that. I think she said it’s a racial ability, but I haven’t figured out what it is yet.

The whole group telling Ayda that her formal friendship declaration is weird, but objectively less confusing than the typical way of doing it.

Also, I told you making friends was gonna pay dividends! The secret (“secret”) goal of every D&D campaign is to make as many friends as possible, starting with your party members and the sky’s the limit after that. And it works out perfectly since Adaine is gone but they have another high level wizard with the same specialty filling in.

Gilear shaking down Fabian for 250g instead of giving him a pep talk was low key hysterical. The comic timing on that from Brennan was so good.

I wonder what Riz was going to tell Fabian during his pull aside. I think this is like the second time Riz was going to pull him aside and then it ended up not happening. He’d already talked to him earlier so I wonder what else he wanted to say that would have required a pull-aside.

Wild that Kristen took the Warding Bond to help Fabian and then both of them were basically out the entire fight. Lol, maybe that’s why Ally couldn’t dicemance this episode. Their luck was tied to Lou’s terrible streak.

Looks like we’re finally gonna get some insight on Fabian’s mom’s side of the family. We really don’t know much about her. Wouldn’t it be wild if all of them were essentially country/farmer elves and Halariel is the only one who’s Like That because she moved away and “made it”.

“Minus 3 to Dex, also in real life.”

As much as I loved every choice Adaine made in this episode, (1) I feel like I would have at least counter-offered the elves something like, “Help us win then I’ll go,” and (2) I couldn’t help but worry about the position she was putting herself in by not playing along at least a little, although it would only have helped her so much because outright lying to someone who has detect thoughts on you is damn near impossible. She at least could have saved herself the torture of trance-deprivation. But, like, is she gonna be able to take her meds? Because this very much seems like an Anxiety Inducing Situation.

I’m gonna fight Kristen and Tracker for stopping to have sex in the middle of this and I’m gonna fight Brennan for ending this episode on a sex joke.

Also, looks like the whole Sandra-Lynn/Garthy/Jawbone situation is finally about to come to a head. So just add that to the list of things you’re bracing for.

Sandra-Lynn re: Fig Stealing A Pirate’s Soul: Horrifying, You’re wonderful.

“My friend’s a rock star!”

I love that Fig consistently says, “You wanna go for a ride?” before she uses Dimension Door with someone.

“Is almost died the same as having died?”

“I think I have a lot of friends but then everyone is mean to me.” Rizzzzz. But also, all my closest friendships in high school could easily be mistaken for my enemies for all the time we spent clowning on each other.

Lol at that one elf trying to turn Adaine’s words back on her as a zinger (“Must not be a great oracle.”) but failing twice because Adaine/Siobhan’s genuinely did not remember what she said before.

As blunt as Ayda is, her, “Your friends are my friends,” was one of the sweetest moments of the episodes. There is something really touching about plainly stating emotional information.

Man! I have been wanting to see what exactly is going on with Aelwyn for AGES and we finally caught a glimpse. I was wondering whether she was in a country club prison or more of a Gitmo situation and I forgot that elves are so into The Aesthetic that they will put you in a torture device in a country club. But yeah, they def aren’t pulling their punches. They’re been torturing her for almost a year. That’s brutal (and mechanically bad because even if they break her out, she’s gonna have zero spell slots and 5 levels of exhaustion probably which is one less than it takes to kill you). And I’m curious. Is it a means to an end or is the torture the end itself? Is there information she refused to give them or is this just how they punish people in Falinel? In any case, you don’t get tortured for a year without at least a little mind-breakage. Very interested to see where is on a scale from 0 to Avanash and how she reacts to Adaine when they inevitably meet again. And I’m curious to see if Adaine softens to her sister at all under the circumstances. That Aelwyn redemption arc is within our grasp.

Likewise, this gives us more information we can use to make guesses about what’s going on with Adaine’s mom. She pretty clearly isn’t working with Falinel seeing as the don’t know where she is and Aelwyn is being held under bad conditions. All signs seem to point to her going rogue and breaking from both her husband and Falinel to try and spring her daughter. I want Adaine to have at least one half-decent parent and I also want the Drama of it All so I really hope that’s what we end up seeing.

F Adaine’s dad, man. Like, truly and from the bottom of my heart. To make a kid--your kid--feel so unloved is frankly a travesty. And to be able to do something this terrible to your kid without showing any emotion really in either direction is heartless and cruel in such a casual way. I hope he has enough capacity for emotion to feel properly brought low when the Bad Kids kick his ass.

And I’m very ready to see all the rest of the Bad Kids [Edit: Just Realized I never finished this thought. All I was gonna say was I’m excited to see the rest of the Bad Kids torn up/angry/determined/whatever over this. A character getting kidnapped is great for any found family story because then you get to watch everyone else move heaven and earth to try and rescue them which is very my jam.]

Everyone calling for Fabian (particularly Riz who was like Dying-dying) and Fabian just not being able to do anything was so rough. And even rougher because, out of game, Stunned is a status condition but, in game, there’s really nothing actually stopping you. It’s not like you’re being physically held back. It’s all in your head. So Fabian knowing he can run over and help but simply not being able to is just so painful.

“Usually I drive an automatic. This is...also an automatic but it’s slightly different.” (Gorgug, zero judgement: Oh, OK.)

“You’re rich, I’m not. Help me.”

Man, D&D y’all. Can you imagine how differently this story could be going if they’d just gone straight to Falinel and not stopped in Leviathan? At the very least, Fabian’s arc would be going very differently.

And speaking of, Fabian is still having such a rough go at it. Having another fight in two days where he was basically reduced to firing a crossbow once and retreating while his allies got smacked down must have been rough. And now he’s got to go straight into another emergency situation with basically no downtime. This isn’t gonna be good for his psyche. Maybe there’s someone at his mom’s old stomping grounds that can help him get on the road to a better headspace. Or maybe he’ll end up in a situation where he has to step up or something will die and he’ll go with option A. Or maybe Lou will sell his soul for dice powers like Allie did. Only time will tell.

Kristen and Fabian are bagging on Gilear. The camera shifts slightly to the left and he’s standing barely 5 feet away from them.

Also, I love the detail of Garthy’s aura around the Gold Gardens softening Fig’s deafen curse on Gilear.

Adaine blowing all her spell slots to be as annoying as possible is so on brand. Adaine is so funny to me because, on a normal day, she’s the most polite and easiest to deal with Bad Kid but she is just as prone to childish taunting or dedicating her life to making yours a living hell if given half a reason.

Loved Ally’s callback to the “this is also a forest” metaphor from a few eps back.

Again, just to make sure no one is blindsided, we have one more episode to go before the Holiday break. I estimate they the kids probably won’t get to Adaine in that time or will just barely get to her with little time to interact (though D&D is hard to predict due to the high probability of unexpected player moves). Anyway, my point is, I’m bracing for a maddening cliffhanger between the next ep and the one after that.

Riz and Cathilda both got Nat 20s this episode. Fabian, Gorgug, and Adaine all got Nat 1s (1 apiece) and Brennan as I think Wicklaw got 2 Nat 1s.

#fantasy high #fantasy high live #dimension 20 #fantasy high spoilers #fantasy high live spoilers #report card

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