#And if I force myself to its gonna lose its magic

[sleepanonymous]

I just wanna say that watching Mr. Vessel Sleep Token the First lay down in the middle of The Summoning tonight at Red Rocks was the most relatable thing I’ve ever seen him do. The Vessel/Mother Token fued may be over. I haven't decided yet, gonna sleep on it 🫡

[justalia]

address the feeling

recently i’ve been thinking about my understandings of the law and i decided to read again some of the stuff i read at the beginning of my journey. i’m glad i did because i now have a deeper understanding of what i thought i understood before, but actually never truly grasped its full meaning.

i have to be honest with you sometimes i still have my moments of anxiety, i still have my mind wondering if i’m doing things right and once in a while i still ask myself if i’m doing enough. shocking right? from my posts you may be thinking that there’s no one that understands the law better than me and you may be thinking “she must have the most perfect self concept i can’t wait to get there”

truth is: we are all humans at the end of the day and we are gonna have our moments, no one is better than anybody and the fact that my posts have helped people fill my heart with joy because i do not think of myself as a teacher, i merely try to share the notes of what i studied for myself and try to write it in a way that can reach anyone easily.

i haven’t felt inspired to post something in a while now, i was just numb cause i thought “there’s nothing else i could possibly share my thoughts on” and i have drafts of posts i have started writing but never finished because i didn’t feel called to do it and i don’t like to force myself to write something.

all my posts come from a burst of inspiration and i write them all at once (or at least i try) seizing the moment in which i feel the most inspired.

this being said what i’m about to address in this post is probably the most important teaching i have come across while reading the source and reading some material again has struck me with inspiration.

————————————————————————

“feeling is the secret.”

what does that mean?

to say that feeling is the secret is to say that feeling is the womb in which all things are born, when felt an idea has to be expressed whether you like it or not, unless you change the feeling and fuse your imagination with its opposite.

you see your physical world has no way of existing if it wasn’t for your imagination, it reflects that and the ideas you believe to be true.

“yeah alia you’ve said that”

i know i know, i have addressed this, these are the basics, but bear with me.

pay attention to what i’ve just said “it reflects the ideas you believe to be true”.

how tiring does that sound? does that mean we have to change our beliefs? does that mean we have to do shadow work and see what ingrained belief we have to dismount?

it doesn’t.

self is what we believe to be true and what gets reflected? self.

inevitably when we start to think about this we think we have to find a magical way to change our beliefs and to trick our mind into believing something new about ourselves or we pretend in hopes to fake it till we make it. we begin this journey prepared to train ourselves, prepared to do dozens of techniques and we fill ourselves with hope.

self is what we believe to be true in this world of imagination, our beliefs get reflected and this is why not every single thing we imagine gets reflected. yes, imagination gets always reflected and it happens instantly, but for that to happen you must believe in the reality of said idea.

what is a belief?

a belief is something, an idea, a concept YOU feel to be true. you is the key word because the sole operant power is you, in your life your world operates according to your assumptions, in your life there is no other creator but imagination, YOUR imagination.

a belief is something you feel to be true because a belief it’s just an idea and it’s powerless until we feel it to be true.

why do we feel it to be true? we decide it is.

you decided that your friend was rude to you because they don’t want to be your friend anymore; you decided that your partner was losing feelings because they were distant one day; you decided you were going to fail the test even if days away because you didn’t feel good enough.

you decided the reason your friend was rude to you was because they didn’t want to be your friend anymore, even if just yesterday they asked you to hang out.

you decided the reason your partner was acting a bit distant today was because they are losing feelings, even if just yesterday they said how much they loved you and bought you flowers.

you decided you were going to fail the test before you even started studying for it because you decided you weren’t smart enough, even if the last test you did went beautifully.

you have been making decisions dismissing the senses your whole life and probably occupying states that do not serve you at all without even realizing it. you have misused your power for so many years it feels too good to be true to finally realize it’s all in your hands.

to decide that your friend was rude because they don’t want to be your friend is just as easy as deciding they just had a bad day and accept that as true.

to decide that your partner is losing feelings because they are acting a bit distant today is just as easy as deciding they just were busy today and accept that as true.

to decide that you’re going to pass the test and that you are smart enough is just as easy to accept as true.

how? how can i accept that as true if reality is showing me the opposite? how can i accept it as true if i failed in the past?

we always disregard appearances, we always disregard and dismiss the senses and accept things as true based on our imagination. there is no outside reality because the true reality is within and as within so without. you accepted it as true and now it is expressing in your life, your mirror is just reflecting what you decided to be true, you had no other proof when you started assuming those negative things about yourself and about others.

think about it! when you first started worrying your partner was losing feelings, did you have proof of it? did you have concrete proof that made you think they wanted to dump you? i think you made an assumption, decided it was true hoped with all your heart it wasn’t, but felt it to be true and soon you were provided with proof and there you go: “just like i thought”.

you decide everything all the damn time!! trust me this is nothing new, the thing is that when it comes to positive things we want to believe to be true we think we need proof, and what is proof? the permission to believe something as true. the 3D never played a part in this, when it came to you assuming negative things about yourself or about others you didn’t think about how it wasn’t true on the outside, did you? when you started feeling insecure in your relationship and worried they would dump you, did you think about how it wasn’t “real” on the outside? did you worry about how the outside was opposite so it couldn’t possibly be true?

no, you didn’t.

you decided it was true, trusted it, dismissed the senses even when completely opposite and soon enough the universe, god, whatever you believe in, provided proof for you.

the power we have is the power of dismissing the senses, the power of deciding what is true or not. and you do that using imagination as your instrument. yes, imagination gets expressed but imagination is not just the silly little scenarios you make up, imagination is your mental activity and what gets expressed is what you believe to be true in imagination.

again when it came to negative stuff you were well aware that the outside was opposite from what you believed to be true but you didn’t care one bit and it still manifested into your life. your lover was distant one day, you assumed they lost feelings, the next day they tell you how much they love you and you assume they are lying, you assume the outside isn’t as true as what you believe to be true inside.

you sustain that feeling, you trust it, and it gets expressed.

you never actually waited to look at your partner and see them telling you they were losing feelings before you assumed they were. you never worried about what the 3D was showing you, you never CARED for it.

when you assume something new about yourself and you imagine yourself to already be the one you wish to be you do so because by imagining you are experiencing it in the true reality. imagining it to be already realized helps because your imagination is a tool, it’s an instrument that makes it easier to trust the new idea you decided to assume about yourself because you actually experienced it.

when you imagine yourself in a new state and you do so by, for example, conjuring up a scene, you do so because you want to experience what you desire. you want to live it, you want to experience it and feel it to be true, that’s what the scenes are for, you visualize a scene that implies your objective realized and you indulge in that peacefully enjoying it.

you don’t have to necessarily visualize scenes, affirm, or do this or that technique. these are just tools, methods you can use to use your imagination in a way that is most comfortable to you. for example i am naturally a visualizer so to get myself in a new state sometimes i find it helpful to conjure up a scene that implies my objective realized and experience it, i enjoy it fully and when i open my eyes i trust the implications of that scene to be true, i just experienced it, who’s gonna tell me i didn’t?

what you need more than anything is to give yourself permission to trust in the reality of imagination, that’s the only thing you need.

yes, you are allowed to believe you are good enough for that job; you are allowed to believe you are safe and secure in relationships; you are allowed to believe anything you want no matter how far fetched it might seem.

you can be so bold with your scenes, or your affirmations. you imagine the most perfect scene or say the most wonderful affirmations but i dare you to be as brave with feeling as you are with your scenes and your words.

i dare you to accept it is true, i dare you to believe it is true because you said it is, and then again i’m not talking about the outside!!! i’m talking about imagination because imagination is the only reality. if it is true in imagination and it is because you can just DECIDE it is, then it’s truth. there’s nothing more to do on your part, you just sustain that state and everything else will take care of itself.

free yourself entirely in your mind and accept as truth whatever you desire to be true about yourself, you can imagine yourself to be confident, smart, beautiful, loved, cared for and you can give yourself permission to accept it to be true inside of imagination and see yourself exactly how you want to see yourself.

stop caring about how it’ll happen or if it will happen or what will happen and just FEEL.

FEEL WHATEVER YOU TRULY WANT TO FEEL.

address the feeling

what do i mean by that?

pay attention to your mental activity for one day and see where your mind wonders naturally, that will tell you your current state.

let’s say you get ugly thoughts, you think you’re not enough and that you are going to fail the test you have in two weeks. pay attention to your mental activity and see how the thoughts FOLLOW the feeling, and not viceversa. first you get the feeling of unworthiness and then you start thinking “i’m not enough i will fail i can’t do this”, there is no inherent truth in those thoughts.

it may be difficult to notice at first but everything starts from a feeling and then the thoughts follow. there is no thought you have to flip because they hold no truth and no power by themselves, they are simply a manifestation of your FEELING.

fearful feeling gives birth to fearful thoughts. anxious feeling gives birth to anxious thoughts. lonely feeling gives birth to thoughts of loneliness. insecure feeling gives birth to insecure thoughts.

the only reason why you believe something to be true is because you FEEL it. there’s no actual truth in those fearful, anxious, insecure thoughts.

YOU FELT FEAR and the fearful thoughts came along and then you started worrying about them manifesting into your life. YOU FELT INSECURE and the thoughts of insecurity and unworthiness came alone and you started feeling bad about yourself and unworthy of your desire.

just as easily as you felt insecure you can feel secure, just as easily as you felt fear you can feel safe.

you create the feeling you desire to feel and you indulge in that, you FEEL it because why would you deny yourself of such experience if you can have it?

why would you deny yourself from experiencing what you want in your own mind? why would you create blockages? why don’t you feel what you want to feel? because you are scared? scared of what? of it not working? working for what?

this is not a method for fuck’s sake. this is not a technique!!! this is how you are living, this is how you have lived and how you’ll always live.

change your feeling, allow yourself to feel what you want to feel and thoughts will naturally come from that, and from thoughts will come actions and from actions will come events. NATURALLY.

there’s no work on your part, meaning that you don’t have to worry about what you need to think or do, you will naturally do that. and this goes for opposite action too: if you’re manifesting to pass all your tests with straight A’s and you go and decide to sit on your ass all day without studying you are still messing with the how! you are pretending you have something IN THE MIRROR when you DON’T! you have it in imagination ONLY. your job is to change self and you don’t change self by pretending or acting as if you have something in the mirror.

your job is to simply FINALLY give yourself permission to actually FEEL.

[mustainegf]

OK I WASNT GONNA REQUEST CUS ITS MY FIRST TIME DOING SMTH LIKE THIS!!!! okay so basically black album! james and reader are out with the rest of the band at a restaurant or a store or smth and james ends up sneakily like ☝🏻ing her?? IDK IF THIS SOUNDS WEIRD OR U DONT GET IT BUT YEAH

THIS WAS SO FUN YO WRITE I LOVE SNEAKY STUFF LIKE THISSS

The restaurant buzzed with the sound of clinking glasses and the murmur of conversations. James, Lars, Kirk, Jason, and I sat at a large round table, tucked into a cozy corner.

It was a rare night off, and we were all enjoying the chance to relax and catch up. I sat next to James, feeling the warmth of his body close to mine as the guys bantered and laughed about their latest tour experiences.

I could feel James’s hand resting on my thigh, a familiar and comforting presence. We exchanged a quick smile, a shared understanding of the bond we had amidst the chaos of the rock and roll lifestyle.

As the conversation flowed, James’s hand began to move, his fingers gently spreading my legs under the table. I shot him a surprised glance, but he kept his eyes on Lars, who was recounting a particularly wild night on tour.

James’s fingers found the edge of my panties, and I felt a jolt of electricity shoot through me. He acted as if nothing was happening, his face a mask of calm as he laughed at Kirk’s joke.

Meanwhile, his fingers slipped beneath the fabric, brushing against my most sensitive spot. I bit my lip, trying to focus on the conversation around me, but it was nearly impossible with the way James was touching me.

I shifted slightly in my seat, trying to maintain my composure. Jason asked me a question about my work, and I forced myself to respond, hoping my voice didn’t betray the pleasure coursing through me.

“It’s been busy, but I’m managing,” I said, my voice surprisingly steady. “How’s the new album coming along?”

James’s fingers began to move more insistently, stroking me in slow, deliberate circles. I had to fight the urge to squirm in my seat, my breath catching in my throat.

He continued to act completely normal, discussing the album with Jason while his hand worked its magic under the table.

“I think it’s going to be our best yet,” Jason was saying. “We’ve really pushed ourselves this time.”

“That’s great to hear,” I managed, my voice sounding slightly strained. I reached for my glass of water, hoping to hide the flush creeping up my neck.

James’s fingers slipped inside me, and I had to bite down hard on my lip to stifle a moan. He knew exactly how to drive me crazy, his movements confident and unrelenting.

My heartbeat quickened, and I struggled to maintain a neutral expression as I responded to the guys’ questions and comments.

“So, how are you enjoying the tour?” Lars asked, his eyes twinkling with mischief.

“It’s been…amazing,” I replied, my voice barely a whisper. I glanced at James, who gave me a quick, knowing smile before turning back to the conversation.

James’s fingers continued their relentless rhythm, and I felt the pressure building inside me.

I gripped the edge of the seat, trying to focus on anything but the pleasure radiating from his touch. It was a cruel game he was playing, and he was winning.

Kirk started talking about a new riff he was working on, and I tried to listen, but my mind was clouded with desire.

James’s hand never faltered, his fingers plunging deeper, and I knew I was close to losing control.

James chuckled at something Lars said, his fingers curling inside me just right. I bit my lip harder, trying to keep my breathing even. The bandmates were none the wiser, their laughter and banter providing a cover for what was happening under the table.

The pressure built steadily, my body responding to James’s expert touch. I squeezed my thighs together, trapping his hand there, but he continued relentlessly, his thumb now brushing against my clit.

It was too much. I could feel my control slipping, the pleasure mounting with each passing second.

James glanced at me, his eyes dark with desire. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. I gave him a pleading look, but he only smirked, increasing the pace. My body tensed, the wave of pleasure crashing over me as I came, my inner walls clenching around his fingers. I managed to stay silent, only a small gasp escaping my lips.

Inlet my head fall slightly, hoping nobody would see.

Kirk’s eyes were on me again, concern evident. “Are you sure you’re okay? You look a bit flushed.”

I took a deep breath, forcing a smile. “Just a bit cold, I’m fine,” I said, trembling slightly.

James withdrew his hand, casually sucking off his fingers without anyone seeing.

He gave my thigh a reassuring squeeze before turning his full attention back to the conversation, leaving me to catch my breath and regain my composure.

The rest of the dinner passed in a blur. I could hardly focus on the conversation, my body still tingling from the intensity of what had just happened. James acted as if nothing unusual had occurred, his demeanor cool and collected.

As we said our goodbyes and headed out of the restaurant, James leaned in close, his breath warm against my ear. “You did great,” he whispered, his voice low and husky. “Let’s get home. I’m not done with you yet.”

[light-end-dragon]

Chapter 1

Cain: Okay! This is definitely the place that request was talking about.

Arthur: Yes, the map that was included all but confirms it, but…Master Sage, do you sense anything? 

Akira: No, I thought this would be a desolate place, but there’s nothing really distinct…

The three of us tilted our heads in concert, confused about the outcome.

We were visiting a deserted town in the Central kingdom, on yet another report of an incident caused by the Great Calamity. 

“There is something terrifying haunting the ruins of the former town-the air is so cold scary it’s so horrible please come quickly” That was all the chaotic contents of the letter said, so we went immediately to investigate-

Bradley: Lemme give you what I think. These weird-ass air chills and fear they’re talkin’ about or whatever- it ain’t caused by the Calamity at all. 

Arthur: Is there a reason you’re able to be so certain, Bradley? 

Bradley: It’s real simple. You lot would even be able to figure it out eventually; do you see any signs of the Calamity bein’ here? 

Bradley: Cause there aren’t any. And so my job here is done. 

Cain: Okay, okay. Look, I know you’re just here for the pardon, but we can’t exactly bring a proper end to this deal like that. 

Bradley: Who gives a shit about proper? If it’s nothin’, it’s nothin’. 

Bradley: The twins jus’ flapped their traps about  “helpin’ investigate this strange incident.” If you want me to hunt down this 'chilly thing', I’m gonna need some extra incentive. 

Bradley gave a flippant wave of the hand, but for some reason, his gaze kept shifting over to the forest on the other side of the ruined walls. 

Akira:  ….? Um, Bradley, is there something over–

Bradley: Have a good rest of yer night there-don’t fuck ‘round too long! 

(Sound of Bradley whooshing away.)

Arthur: Ah-! He’s gone…..

Cain: Of course he is…..but at any rate, I should probably wrap it up this one time now. 

Cain: Magic and curses aren't the only things that would cause chills and strange behaviors like this. If its poison or a sickness, it’s better to let doctors take the stage. 

Arthur: That is a good point….Master Sage, Cain and I can report back to Drummond this time. 

Arthur: It may be useful to approach this from a different angle for us to help the frightened residents….would that be okay with you? 

Akira: Of course. Please, if you two wouldn’t mind…

Arthur: Thank you very much, Master sage. Then shall we return to the Manor as well?

Cain: Yeah.

Cain nodded, but then oddly his gaze drifted over to the ruined walls. He muttered something under his breath, like he didn’t want anyone to hear. 

Cain: Still…it wasn’t from the Calamity? 

Cain: This has to be where that incident took place, though….

Akira: That incident….?

Arthur + Sacrificium: ….!

With a sudden snap, both Arthur and Sacrikitty turned towards the forest. 

Just one beat behind, Cain turned around as well, ready to face whatever it was. 

(Sound of wind blowing through.)

There wasn’t a chance for me to wonder how or why as a cold icy wind flew past my face.

Because the temperature then dropped dramatically, to an unnatural degree. 

There was no need to ask Cain or Arthur what was going on; I understood instinctively.

Something terrifying was heading towards us from the forest.

Akira: (Oh God, oh God, I’m so scared, it’s so scary so scary so scary scary oh God….) 

Nothing was even happening, yet my legs gave out underneath me, forcing me to shakily sit on the ground.

(Sound of clothes shifting as Akira falls onto the ground.)

Hugging Sacrikitty close, I buried my face into its body, feeling like I was losing control of myself from the horrid chill. 

I was afraid I might let out a cry if I didn’t. 

Cain: Akira?! Are you okay??! 

Arthur: Master Sage……I-what….why…why can’t I move?!! 

Arthur had his gaze cast deliberately down, like he was trying to avert his eyes from something. 

(Sound of leaves rustling in the distance.)

As he did so, the trees in the forest started rustling. 

Something was coming; something I must not look at. 

Akira: Aahh…..

It was just a fleeting shadow on the edge of my vision, but it was enough for me to form a picture; a strange, distorted figure covered in a pitch black mourning veil, dragging the train along in the dirt.

A swollen, distorted head shaped like rotten fruit; skeletal arms so long they almost touched the ground; and a body that was twisted a complete 180 degrees towards us.

Akira: …..ck……

Arthur: Th…that's…..the spirit…..

Cain: Master Sage, Arthur!

(Sound of footsteps running.)

Neither Arthur nor I were able to raise our heads still, but I heard the sound of frantic footsteps as Cain burst out between us and the approaching figure. 

Cain: Run!! I’ll hold it off!!

Arthur: C….Cain! No….it’s dangerous!

Cain: That’s why you need to get out of here!! Go, now!! 

(Sound of Cain drawing his sword.)

Cain raised his sword as the sound of gravel being crunched underfoot drew nearer. 

Cain: Fuck, this really is some sort of demon! I…I can see it just fine…..

???: sA…W……saw…

???: You…sAW it.

Cain: Huh? 

???: You saw iT….you sawit yousawityousawityousawitYOUSAWITYOUSAWITYOUSAWITYOUSAWITYOUSAWITYOUSAWYOUSAWYOUSAWYOUSAWYOUSAW

Bradley: ….Don’t make eye contact, you fucking idiot!!!

(Sound of magic, then several gunshots being fired.)

An echo of a gunshot rang out, and instantly the oppressive chill faded.

When I finally managed to raise my head, I caught a glimpse of the spirit trying to flee into the forest, Bradley hovering above us on his broom.

Cain, who had stood his ground between us and the demonic being, lowered his sword with a sigh of relief.

All the while tears of thick, oozing blood trailed from his golden-colored eye. 

Akira + Arthur: ….?!

Cain: Uaah!! What the-what the hell-?! 

Bradley: Fuck, this is why I wanted to get outta here!

Bradley cursed up a storm, all the while wiping at his eyes with his thumb. Even so, I could still see the dark red color that stained his skin.

Akira: Cain! Bradley…!

Arthur: Are you two okay?! I’m so sorry, it’s because I couldn’t move……

Cain: It’s not your fault, Arthur. See? The two of us are fine-

Bradley: We ain’t fine.

Bradley: This blood’s the sign of a curse. Me an’ Mr. Knight here are cursed.

Arthur: Cursed…?

Bradley: Yep.

Bradley: That thing will keep huntin’ us down, even to the ends of the earth. Just to kill us.

-----------------------------:･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･------------------------------

Cain: Faust, thanks for coming. I’m real sorry to bother you like this.

Faust: It’s fine, really.

A short while after. We had moved from the abandoned town to a meadow far away from any civilization.

Arthur had sent a letter to the Manor to beg for Faust’s help in the matter, and he had arrived here as well.

According to Bradley, the two of them could only use weak magic now, about what it took to fly a broom.

Any more than that, and that “Wandering Lament” would immediately be able to sense them.

Faust: Anyway, you were saying you were cursed by this wandering spirit..? 

Bradley: This shit’s your specialty, right? Can ya fix it? 

Faust: I have all the necessary components to try, but the curse is powerful. I can’t say yes with any sort of certainty.

Akira: Um, this “Wandering Lament”.....what sort of spirit is it? The fact that it would hunt you down to the ends of the earth…..

Faust: The remnants of a deceased person that manifests from a powerful grief or some sort of lingering attachment. At this point, I wouldn’t even call it a ghost anymore; it’s just a shadow of their former self; one that’s forgotten everything. Their name, why it is they were grieving, until the only thing it has left is hatred. 

Faust: If you make eye contact with it, it forges a connection between you; and it will indiscriminately hunt down anyone who does so.

However, it didn’t seem like they’d be able to turn the tables on the demonic spirit and defeat it to end the curse.

Once a soul came into contact with this "Wandering Lament", it became akin to a water bottle that held a poisonous stone. Even if you took the stone out, the water wouldn’t become drinkable again.

And a soul that’s eaten away at by this deep resentment the spirit held would start drawing misfortune and calamity onto themselves. And before long, amidst all that ruin, they too would die, grieving and anguished.

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Ive made through chapters 4-7 today and good god, I feel like i had basically nothing to say about acotar as I was reading it but with this book theres so much to talk about for some reason, its wild. Truly, I did not realize how much I liked Feyre in the first book until I was under threat of losing her

Now, I will say that Feyre seems in-character so far, shes still the same woman but traumatized, but I am worried for her. Tamlin is a whole different story though, SJM might as well shoot him dead right in front of me for how thoroughly hes being character assassinated. Like, if Tamlin actually cares about Feyre as a person and not just in a douchy, possessive alphahole way, which he should because Tamlin was not that kind of guy previously, then he would force Feyre to train so she can defend herself if necessary, not forbid her from it. Even if he didnt want her to use her magical powers, surely he would make her practice with her knife or with a sword or even with her bow just to be safe, because hes not always gonna be there

I think his actions do continue to make sense if you look at them from his perspective, but I also maintain that he's doing a really bad job at responding to Feyre. But also, its so laughably obvious what sjm is doing by having Tamlin say shit like "you were stolen from me", shes trying to paint him as some objectifying asshole. Even Lucien calling her "Tamlin's bride" feels like its part of all this, and I know Ianthe is gonna turn out to be a traitor and a rapist at some point, so it really comes across as an attempt to villify the entire spring court for its association with Tamlin

Speaking of Lucien, I genuinely think part of the reason Feylin is doing so badly in this book is that his dynamic with Tamlin is completely different now. For some reason hes all like "oh, my High Lord" instead of "my good friend Tamlin", he suddenly cant say a word against him when he was talking to shit to him just a few months ago in-uinverse. Like, if their dynamic was the same as it was in acotar, Lucien wouldve probably been like "hey man, I know youre stressed and I get it, I know what its like to watch the love of my life get brutally murdered I dont know what its like to have her magically ressurected again but thats neither here nor there, but Feyre is clearly not happy being inside all day and you need a break, go take her out on a date in the woods, I'll stay here and take care of everything, dont even worry about it" or gotten him to comprise with Feyre or chill tf out or SOMETHING but because theres suddenly this rigid hierarchy in the spring court in order to make the night court look better

Speaking of the night court, Ive heard some stuff about it feeling very orientalist but it still managed to completely blindsight me with its badness. Feyre got fucking harem pants to wear, really? And a short-sleeved croptop, and no fucking shoes, probably because Rhys didnt want Feyre throwing shoes at him again. That was the one moment in this book that brought me genuine joy btw, I would read a thousand fanfics about her just throwing shit at him

Anyway, speaking of my guy (derogatory) Rhysand Nolastname, hes so incredibly annoying I dont even have any coherent thoughts about him right now, like, if I were to write down what I think of him I would just write "he fuckinh pisses me off" over and over again. Im actually a really big fan of edgy shadow bois, but only if theyre like, sad and angry and closed off, if theyre like Rhysand and theyre all flirty and teasing and cocky and shit, theyre just annoying and nothing else. And the romance has barely even started yet, I cant imagine how much worse the flirting is gonna get later. Not to mention all these desperate and obvious attempts by sjm to make him sympathetic and morally good now, its honestly pretty pathetic

Now Im gonna be real with you, I didnt get a lot of sleep yesterday and I can feel myself and the things Im writing getting less and less coherent, so Im just gonna hit you with the very last of my thoughts bullet point style

The fact that Amarantha apparently didnt actually go rogue and it was all part of Hybern's plan feels misogynistic ngl

Ianthe's entire character already feels so misogynistic and slutshame-y and she hasnt even assaulted anyone yet

Something about Mor bothers me, I cant quite put my finger on it but its there. I think I do like her for annoying Rhys though

God, Im gonna have so much to say about the Illyrians but for now, its awfully bold of Rhysand to be like "they wasted no time throwing themselves before her feet" when THATS WHAT HE DID

Thats it for now

[wh0re-in-the0ry]

I was going through my liked videos so

First dnd game with slime - maybe this is just your first game with him, first game ever, or maybe the first time meeting him. Its cute how excited he gets about it!

First request yippee :D

Comic Store Owner! Charlie x GN! Reader (Part 1 of 2)

I'm a bit rusty when it comes to my writing (especially xreaders), so constructive criticism is welcomed. The reader's pronouns are not mentioned besides you/your and the term "dude" is used once in a gender-neutral way ^^

((Also... I got carried away. I was planning on this to just be a quick drabble, but one thing led to another, and I decided to make it into two parts. The first part being the setup and the next part will be the actual game. Part two should be out by Sunday.))

Anyways, I hope you enjoy, Annon. :]

💚💚💚

There's a small comic bookstore not too far from your job. It's a small joint but it's packed to the brim with anything and everything your little nerd heart needs: comics, minifigures, board games, off brand anime plushies, that cute guy who owns the place, DND handbooks, trading cards, it had it all.

You visit the store often after your shift; most times you don't even buy anything, you (and your wallet) were content with just looking around. It's a nice thing to do while you wait for the bus to finally arive. The guy behind the register, which you found out was named Charlie through small talk, never seemed to mind your wandering, the store was never that busy and "It's nice to have a familiar face stop by."

After an extremely exhausting day of work, you enter the comic store and come across a set of dice, they were bright shade green that sparkled in the light with deep purple numbers engraved in each of the faces. You stare at the tube of dice in front of you. They were so gorgeous, you just needed to buy them. Afterall, you deserve to treat yourself after today, right? Yeah- with a grin on your face you decide to actually buy something for yourself. After checking the price on the top of the tube and immediately put them back. They are defiantly pretty, but not $17.50 +tax pretty.

You sigh and continue exploring the store as usual. But no matter how many times you skim through the graphic novels, admire the signed posters, and browse through the keychains, you keep going back to the dice section. You start to fiddle with the tube of dice again. Maybe the price magically changed within the fifteen minutes you last checked- no, it's still basically 20 dollars, an hour of your work, used on dice you might not even use... but they look so nice, and they won't take up too much space... Uhg be real, Y/n. You know that they'll be sitting in your junk drawer and collecting dust unless you actually use them... and sure you have friends but none of them shown interest in games like DND. Hell- you've never even played DND yourself, where do you even start? How do you even start-

"Hey, Y/n. Ya need help with something?"

"Huh?" You lose your train of thought and turn to see Charlie next to you with his usual happy grin, "Oh uhh- I'm just looking around." You say before fumbling slightly when trying to put the dice back again.

Charlie glances at the tube in your hand and smiles, "I gotta say Y/n, you have pretty good taste when it comes to dice. I honestly would've kept them for myself if my collection wasn't so big."

"Oh- well uhh.. I'm actually not sure if I'm going to buy them..." You say feeling a little bit guilty.

"It's fine, Y/n. It's not like I'm not gonna force you to buy it."

"I know it's just that..." You sigh, "It's just that I don't want to buy dice if I already know I won't use them. I don't even know how to play DND... or anyone to do a campaign with."

"Well... you can always join the store's campaign." He proposes.

You turned to him a bit surprised, "The store has a campaign?"

"Yeah! On Saturdays the shop hosts a DND session from 11:00 to 1:30," Charlie pulls out a mini flier about the sessions from his cargo short's pocket, "We just started this campaign a few weeks ago, it's totally beginner friendly and all you need is a character sheet, some dice, and something to write with."

You think for a moment. Saturdays are your only day off from work and you usually like to sleep in until at least noon on those days. But then again where else would you have a chance to try out DND and you should be going outside the house more often... Besides, having an excuse to hang out with Charlie doesn't sound too bad at all. You smile at Charlie, "You know what? Yeah! My schedule is free on Saturdays so I'm down."

Charlie's eyes light up like you've never seen before, and his smiles grows wider, "Wait really? That's perfect! Everyone else in the campaign are new to0 and I'm sure that you guys will get along great and and- Hey how about I help make your character so we can jump right in on Saturday?"

"W-wait you mean like right now?" You asked slightly startled by the boost of energy Charlie has.

Charlie flushes slightly once he realizes how excited he's getting and tries to calm down, "Y-yeah. I mean... it is a pretty slow day for the store, and we'll have more time to actually play if we make your character now rather than the start of the session...What do ya say?"

"Well- uhh sure. That sounds pretty fun."

Charlie's blush dies down and he's back to his usual happy self, "Great! Follow me." With a friendly smile Charlie takes your hand and leads you to the store. You can feel your face heat up slightly from the contact. His are only slightly bigger than yours but they were from the semi-firm grip he held you could tell they were strong, and they were softer than you'd imagine. It would've been a great moment if your hands weren't so sweaty from nerves, hopefully he doesn't notice. "Here we are. Sorry, it's kinda cramped," Charlie says as he lets go of your hand and opens the door for you.

Once you snap out of your fixation on your two's hands you enter the room. It was a pretty big room; it was almost as big as the storefront, but most of that room seemed to be taken up by storage boxes, promotional cardboard cutouts, older furniture, and holiday decorations. It was cluttered but there was enough room for the decent sized table with four chairs on each long side and one chair for the head of the table. "Is this where you hold your sessions?" You ask as you carefully try to navigate the room.

"Yeah," he says while scratching the back of his neck, sounding somewhat embarrassed, "Sorry about the mess, I just moved into an apartment closer to here and the new place didn't come with much storage..."

"Don't worry about it. It's really not that ba-!!" As you tried to reassure Charlie, you somehow managed to slip on a scrapped flier and almost fell backward onto the cold tile floor.

"Woah hey!!-"Charlie quickly catches you by the waist to help you regain your balance, "Hey, are you okay!?"

You can feel your face heat up from his firm grab before awkwardly leaving his grasp. "Yeah- uhh I'm fine," you say with an embarrassed chuckle before sitting in the closest chair to you, "Soo... where do we start?"

Charlie reaches for a box under the table and pulls out a printed-out character sheet and the fifth edition handbook, "Let's start off with your character's race. Do you know what you want to be," he asks while flipping the pages to show you all the different species you could be.

"I... uhhh well-" You were overwhelmed by the sheer number of options you had. There were so many, and you didn't have a decent understanding of what most of them even were. Should you just stick with human to make things easier? But where's the fun in that? Maybe an elf? You know what an elf is for sure. Oh god- you can't keep Charlie waiting... Just pick something already- ANYTHING.

You feel a hand on your shoulder and brake out of your trance once you look up at Charlie, "Hey, do you need help choosing?" His voice is slightly mellow and calmer than usual, you feel yourself shake off the nerves.

You nod, "Yeah, sorry. There's just so many to choose from and I'm not too familiar with most of them..."

"That's fine," He gives you a small smile, "How about I give you a mini explanation for each race and you just tell me if you hear something you like?" You smile back and give him a nod. That doesn't sound that bad, not bad at all.

You nod along to Charlie's explanations and stats on elves, humans, halflings, and such but none of them seem to catch your interest. That's until he gets to the tiefling, a demon looking thing that aren't inherently evil but can be a wee bit dubious. You didn't even need the explanation on it, the moment you heard the name of it you knew exactly what you were going to do.

"I got it! I'll be Teeth, the tiefling, collector of teeth!" You look over at Charlie who seemed surprised by the sudden exclamation. Shit- that's probably a stupid idea. He probably thinks you're weird or something. Oh god, what do you do now? FU-

Your panicking was cut off by the sound of Charlie's laughter. "Dude, that's perfect-! I don't know how I never thought of that."

Oh- never mind, crisis averted. "Wait, really?"

"Yeah! It's amazing! Now how about we work on your class now?" After bouncing around some ideas and laughs, you and Charlie refine Teeth. Your little guy is a tween tiefling ranger who was raised in the woods by the animals. He protects the beast from poachers during the day and drinks to hide from his loneliness and stress at night... he also has a pet cat named tooth :D, You and Charlie just made Teeth, but you are already attached. This isn't just a character, this is your son, you're a parent now. Does that make Char- Nope. Keep it together and calm down. Just... enjoy the moment.

The two of you continue to chat the minutes fly by and they turn to hours and oh shit- its already 8:27??? "Oh god- I missed my bus. Well, I should start walking back before it gets too late," you say while folding your character sheet up in a square to fit into the smaller pocket in your bag.

Charlie glances at the window, "You know it's already pretty late. How about I drive you back to your place?"

Oh god yes! You got to say yes, Y/n. Say it! "I- uhh... I-I think I'll be fine." ...What the fuck is wrong with you, Y/n?

Charlie's smile falters a little, "Oh... You sure? It's pretty dark out."

Y/n you better accept the offer I swear to god- "Yeah you're right, it's probably better if you drive..." Okay never mind :). Charlie's smile comes back as he nods and grabs his keys. Once in the car the two of you keep chatting again about whatever comes to mind really. Movies, video games, dream for the future, everything seemed to be on the table, it just feels really easy to talk to him. It was only supposed to be a ten-minute drive but with all the wrong turns Charlie kept accidentally making, you two eventually make it to your apartment closer to thirty. "Thanks for the ride, Charlie. I'll see you on Saturday," you grab your bag as you said your goodbyes to your... friend.

"Yeah, I'll see you around..." Just as you were about to leave the car, you hear him call out to you, "Hey Y/n-"

You turn to him, "Yeah Charlie?"

"I uhh..." For a split second he hesitates before giving you a soft smile, "I just wanted to say I had fun tonight."

A warm feeling in your heart sets in as you smile back, "I had fun too."

For a moment it was just you two in comfortable silence before Charlie snaps back thanks to the harsh winds seeping into the vehicle, "You should probably get inside now, we don't want you catching something before your first session."

"Oh right-" You actually get out of the car this time and close the door shut, "Bye Charlie!" You wave as Charlie drives off; you can still feel that warm feeling in your chest even in the bitter cold. You go back into your small apartment with that grin still on your face and it stays on for a while. All night while you were getting ready for bed, that smile lingered as you replay tonight's events over and over again, your jaw almost starts horning from the sheer amount of time you grinned. You lay down in your bed and you finally let your mouth and brain relax. It takes a bit longer than usual, but you eventually fall asleep, feeling content. For the first time in a while, you are actually excited for what the near future has in store.

.

Thank you so much for reading and I hope y'all enjoyed it as much as I did writing it. I haven't written any fic since last year and it's my first time ever writing an xreader before. I had so much fun and I gotta thank annon for helping me rediscover how much I love writing.

I'm sorry that I didn't get to the DND part in the DND fic, my bad y'all. Part two will jump into the game. I'm about a quarter done with the second part so expect it to be completed by Sunday.

(Also, here's a fun fact: I just straight up used my DND character for Y/n's. He's a lil' guy and I love him <3 )

-S

.

[gleefultogo]

Opinion

you know? Could you imagine being a character in kique's comic. and lets say that again said characters do get upset about things etc etc, but they kinda just sit on their ass and do nothing about it?. I'll be honest, lately I have this frustration on the way kique handles a characters "problem" going back and seeing in previous pages. and well I strongly dislike how he constantly uses "sex/intercourse" as a clutch to somewhat "cure" a trauma or something. To me, I feel that is just very unrealistic. and because since kique is die hard trying to push these feral, animal and dog characters to come off as human. I'll talk about it as it was reality. First of all, If I was a person who say was in a relationship and my partner was in a bad state of mind mentally. I wouldn't be a person and throw myself towards them sexually, I feel its just wrong in a way? If anything using sex comes off as more of a "in the moment" type of thing. If you get what I mean, like a distraction? Personally I don't think it helps anyone get better when mentally unstable. And I'm just tired of kique's characters being magically cured all because they slept with each other. like huh? again it's just a distraction. But it's used as a constant cycle in his comic. Realistically it would come off as something unhealthy. like i'm sorry but if you had a partner that was constantly in a bad mental state or something and need sexual intercourse just to make them feel better. UGH it was just get really tiring you know?. like it would lose the whole purpose of being "intimate" with your said partner because it's constantly forcefully used in a way that doesn't come off as romantic. Half the characters in this comic who did do the deed. For me it wasn't romantic in anyway, cause fuck kique's patreon supporters. They clearly don't understand the difference. Because let's be honest here, but who in their right minds would wanna have sex with each other knowing 1. A family member of yours might die due to a raid, clearly knowing about it. But you sit on your ass and screw someone out in public? like what? (Feaf and Rhov) like you couldn't wait until there was a bit of peace in your life first? 2. Finding out that your family member died, so someone forces themselves onto you. ok look we all know that rogio is a scummy predator. but if these characters were written more realistically. Then I am certain roamer would of pushed rogio away. Heck I wouldn't wanna sleep with someone after I just talked about my dead friend. That's just weird 3. Knowing that partial family members of yours are nearby. So out of excitement you forcefully kiss someone, then proceed to lead them on? I know keirr and bootleg kargo didn't sleep with each other. But I'm trying to point out that the whole situation wasn't romantic in anyway and the fact that people were shipping them just because they "kissed" is ridiculous. It pretty much just shows that a lot of the patreon people are in it for the sex stuff. I suppose it is ok to have adult content in your comics, movies and stuff. But it being a constant cycle of the same stuff happening, It never really sat right with me and I don't enjoy it. Because with kique's characters there is no chemistry between the characters what so ever. it all so forced. but you see what I am trying to get at here? None of these characters talk about there problems or try and fix them. we just get constant self pity, having sex and then everything is all magically better. When actions speak louder then words. stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it. No one is gonna do it for you. Anyways... Happy Valentines day? lol

[merlions]

The more I research things in relation to magnus protocol the more I'm just like utterly filled with that classic emotion known as "holy shit Jonny Sims did his motherfuckin RESEARCH for this bad baby *smacks side of podcast*"

I feel like in doing any research at all on any topic, I'm finding myself sucked with black hole force into a wikipedia hole and end up accidentally reverse engineering this like, massive writing research tree from the listening side. It's been so implausibly frequent and intricate to have one topic just happen to link to yet ANOTHER eerily related topic that I'm starting to second guess myself, like am I seeing connections where there are none???

But like idk I think there's just SO MUCH and every seemingly unrelated leaf actually does, in fact, end up connecting back to a branch that does seem intimitely related to the tree (...as it were.)(fuckin. Can't talk about trees no more. Fuck u Isaac Newton. Fuckin apple head. Dog apple head fuck. Calcinate ur god damn laboratory) but it's just like the largest kudzu on the fucking planet and there are so many god damn leafs and branches I can't even see a damn quarter of the whole picture, even just considering the historical and alchemical research, before even considering the fictional plot and worldbuilding and how that's tying the irl stuff and TMA stuff and its own stuff together and !! (Is Georgie...???)

And through all of that. I have learned much. And I can say I know for certain now two things.

One: I thought I knew what alchemy was and what its purpose was, and at least a couple of things about it. I did not!

Two: it is infinitely funny that literally right after the Hooke episode (#19) when I was doing research on just Hooke and Micrographia, I said, in total and utter ignorance of any importance this phrasing might have: "[this episode is] Sprinkling mint seeds of Spooky History Research on the fertile but barren golf course of my mind".

I hope Jonny and Alex saw that and got a little chuckle. "Wow this guy really is gonna flip his fuckin lid when he finds out about the steps of alchemy. Like, oh I dunno, Separation! For example" WELL I DID!!! I did flip my lid.

TMagP ep so potent in its in-world 17th century lore drop that it caused me to briefly see into the future. Supernatural cosmic horror writing so choice that it manifests real actual spooky happenings in the real world. wait isnt that a john carpenter film

anyways I'm mostly writing this just to get it out of my own head, bc I feel like I'm losing my mind like I've stepped into a twilight zone episode and I need to find a way back to my original dimension somehow. but also if u read this and are intrigued by what i mean by any of it. i strongly encourage starting some wikipedia holing of ur own. start with literally anything on any topic mentioned in protocol. but esp looking into Sam's comment to Celia in TMP 19, about "spiritual substitution of elements". and know that this will take u on a magical internet journey from which you may return, but not unchanged

[ignyxdaughter]

𝐗𝐈𝐗 - 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐒 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐍

(𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 /𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐤𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐳𝐨𝐯𝐚 𝐱 𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐨𝐧)

MASTERLIST

READ ON WATTPAD

A/N: English is not my first language. I’m gonna mix the books and the tv show to make the story line clearer (I read soc, the grisha trilogy and its tales). I don’t own Shadow and Bone and TO/Legacies characters; they’re, respectively, Leigh Bardugo, L. J. Smith and Julie Plec. Also, this is how I think the Darkling is,and some of the events will be changed due to the story's course!

words: 2873

warnings: mentions of witch/grisha hunt

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They are now cuddled, both their backs resting on the Black Heretic's fountain while gazing at the woods. The witch rests her head on the Grisha's chest, hearing the calming rhythm of his heartbeat. Him, on the other hand, lets his thumb caress her arm.

This is all so new to them, so... peaceful. It seems like a weight has left their shoulders as soon as they found equality in each other, the desire of wanting someone to understand them finally fulfilled.

"So—", Katherine's soothing voice breaks the comfort silence "what made you change your mind?"

Kirigan doesn't take his eyes off the tree he's been looking at for the past minutes. He is still enjoying the fantastic sensation of believing that everything is going to be alright now. "I started to think about what you had said. The Second Army is young, none of them have experienced the Ravka before the Fold. They have the idea that the Unsea is the issue, and that all of Ravka's problems will be solved once it vanishes. However, it is the complete opposite: if we destroy it, things will worsen." She nods, patiently waiting for him to continue. "There is no way to guard the entire border, therefore, Ravka will be exposed to many travelers. The Fjerdans and Shu Hans will take advantage of the country's vulnerability and attack. The drüskelle will have more access to accomplish their hunts too." He turns to the woman by his side, who is gazing at him since he started speaking. "Grishas will be in great danger if the Fold is destroyed."

"The Supernaturals too."

"Ravka will be no more safe haven."

"No, it won't."

"Also—", he takes a sharp breath to gather forces to tell her his conclusion "you were right."

The shadow singer's smile almost reaches her eyes. Oh, how she loves to be told that! No matter how many times that often happens, the pride feeling filling her chest always appears. "Pardon? I don't think I quite heard you."

"I won't repeat myself, Katherine."

"Why not?" Her smirk increases as she sees him scowl towards her. "Your words had such a beautiful sound."

He rolls his eyes. "You are not used to hearing that, I assume."

"Oh, no—", she chuckles. "I am more than used to it. After all, I am always right."

"If people see Alina's powers expanding the Fold, they will label Grishas as aberrations again." He ignores her to continue his line of thought. "Another hunt will be made and, with the Unsea blocking the borders, it'll be difficult to escape. The only way to protect ourselves will be killing all the hunters, which will practically be almost all otkazat'sya."

Ravka will be the stage of a massacre, the unsaid words float through the air. All due to the fight for survival.

"I want my country to be a safe haven, not a remembrance of a bloodshed."

Katherine's gaze softens in compassion. She shares that wish with him; she wants the Grishas and Ravka's Supernaturals to see their country as a secure place where they cannot fear. It would be wonderful if Os Alta transformed into what New Orleans is to many: home.

"Although living now more peacefully, your people still dread, Kirigan. Even receiving all the trainment in the world, there is still the terrifying thought of being attacked by the drüskelle and losing a fight with them. That fear will only grow if they witness a magical imbalance, especially one made by their General. Your Army will work based on dread instead on loyalty, and that is dangerous, because, soon, they will grow tired of feeling this." Her light green eyes are full of worry as she looks at him deeply. "This happened a lot through the centuries, and it always ended with the leader murdered by his own people."

"I know. I searched about those historical revolutions." Her eyebrows raise in surprise to see The Darkling agreeing. "Most of them were because the monarchy prioritized the court instead of the commoners, which were the majority. Only a few people had good life conditions, while the plurality suffered with poor ones. They got sick of injustice and repression, tired of having to survive to make others live. They wanted that possibility for themselves, so, after generations had passed and nothing had been done, they decided to fight for it."

"I witnessed some revolutions and that is what happened, indeed."

"I have lived the conditions of these commoners." Kirigan admits with a heavy chest. Sometimes, he is still affected with the memories of his tough childhood. He used to eat poorly, suffer from the cold, fear the dark when the night came, train for straight exhausting hours in order to learn how to control his powers, have to make new identities in a short period of time, and pass through many other unpleasant experiences. "It was terrible."

The sudden warm hand on his cheek tells him that he is not alone, that Katherine has suffered the same as him and as the many unfortunate people that were part of revolutions. "Survival isn't life, Kirigan. But it is just when you are old that you learn that the change will only come if you fight for it. That's why your Grishas are so immersed in the Fold's utopia: their youthness makes them believe that the time has finally come, that Alina will be the savior to fix all the problems." She offers him a sad smile. "My people are old and are struggling to live in Os Alta poorest area. One of the reasons why they hate your lightscum is this, since she represents all the illusion they had once believed."

"So they are willing to fight for change?"

She nods. "With all of their strength."

"If I promise better life conditions, will an alliance be possible?"

"Only if you guarantee that you have no intentions to destroy the Unsea. Firstly, you have to win their trust, especially the leaders' trust, then you may focus on a deal."

He gently grabs her hand that still is on his cheek. "I think I'll need a bit of your assistance, then."

The witch smirks as soon as she sees the glint on his dark brown eyes. "It will be my pleasure."

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"I swear it was her, Genya!" Michelle stops on her tracks as she hears Alina's voice echo through the room she was entering to clean.

"That's impossible."

"No, it isn't, and you know it!"

The Tailor shakes her head, making many of her red strands fly in the air. "Ms. Anya was playing a dangerous game here, Alina. The Darkling saw her as a threat and sent the oprichniki after her. She's probably dead now."

The Sun Summoner's brown eyes widened in shock. "Dead?"

"Yes." No. Michelle had to restrain a scoff. "I honestly think she was a spy."

"A spy? Really?"

"She knew too much for an ordinary otkazat'sya."

While starting to tie the room where the two Grishas were, Michelle began to make her own opinions. They aren't completely wrong: this specific servant knew too much and was considered by the General himself a threat, which led him to hunt her. However, she is pretty much alive, or better, Katherine Mikaelson is alive. No one knows what happened to Ms. Anya, she just... vanished.

"But, Genya, I swear I saw her today!" The blond's body stills as she cleans a desk. "Are you sure about that all? She seemed so real."

"There's no way Ms. Anya isn't dead, Alina. You probably were tired and hallucinated."

The younger girl looks deeply at the other, brown eyes meeting blue ones. "I know what I saw. Ms. Anya was at the beginning of the woods early this morning. She was hidden, but I saw her looking at Kirigan's chambers."

Oh, damn it, Katherine! You let yourself get caught by a teenager?! Michelle's face instantly turns into a scowl due to the anger she is feeling towards her cousin. By the Ancestors, Kat, you really turn into a fool when you like someone!

The Tailor takes a few seconds to answer her friend, but, finally, she shrugs her off with a hand. "I still think it's nothing to worry about."

I hope so, Genya, because I'm gonna kill Katherine if she drags the family into another trouble with insane plans.

The water singer leaves the Sun Summoner's chambers with heavy steps. As a way to calm herself, she goes to her little room and begins to read one of the books she had picked early in the morning. It is written in French, which eases her off with the thought of being close to her native language, and the author describes actions that may help people who are suffering with memory loss. After all, Michelle isn't certain that a spell will recover all of Agatha's remembrances.

Former lovers who had a long and healthy relationship with the victim may trigger good memories. However, the paramour must reproduce habits that were performed frequently during the time they were a couple.

Her blue eyes widened in sudden realization. There is someone that can aid them.

Of course, she didn't talk to Agatha's ex-lover for decades, but she had a good relationship with her; every Mikaelson — unless Katherine — had. The woman is a mesmerizing person and powerful witch, always willing to help the Supernatural. Michelle is sure that if she sends her a letter explaining about Agatha's current situation, the woman will appear in Os Alta in less than a day.

The water singer closes the book with a smile and immediately stands up. She needs to tell Katherine her new idea, but if her cousin takes too long to arrive, then she will handle the matter in her own hands.

With that in mind, the blond confidently states: "If there's any of Kat's shadows here, tell her to meet me at the Little Palace's library now."

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Hours had passed, and the couple had to go back to their respective places. After Kirigan had just left with his horse, Katherine was almost entering a shadow to go to Praecantrix when she heard Ikatris' smooth voice: Your cousin wants you at the Little Palace's library now. Seemed urgent.

She frowns with the unusual situation and mentally asks the dark figure: Which one?

The spoiled French.

Despite knowing patience isn't one of Michelle's virtues, she can't help but worry, her intuition wanting to alert that something is about to happen. However, as an attempt to ignore this uncomfortable feeling, the witch rolls her light green eyes at the shadow's answer. You know their names, Ikatris. So why do you insist on calling them with these nicknames?

She can almost feel the creature smirking. Because it irritates them.

Katherine can't help but chuckle. Her cousins indeed hate all of Ikatris' nicknames and always tell her to talk to the shadow in order to make him stop, however, it never worked. He is immediately delighted as he sees Hope — manic tribid — sends him a death glare, Michelle — spoiled French — huffs in impatience, Nick — justice alpha — rolls his eyes in annoyance, Agatha — dramatic queen — holding the urge to attack him, and Levi — Kol's counterfeit copy — walking away from him to not get into a fight.

Why don't you give me a nickname too? I have never received one from you.

Because you're Katherine, there's no one like you. You are already unique.

She smiles, a warm sensation reverberating in her chest. Thank you, Ikatris.

The witch then orders her shadows to guide her to the Little Palace's library, where she finds Michelle pacing through the Norse Runes book session. She seems nervous, clenching her fingers on the long white skirt, her blond hair that is usually perfect, is now disheveled. "What happened?"

The French woman turns abruptly and looks at her in rage. "You!" She extends her hands towards the brunette as if wanting to strangle her.

Katherine frowns. "What have I done?"

"What have you—" She seems to be using all of her control to not start yelling in fury. "What have you done?!"

The shadow singer seems uncertain of her actions now. Has she found out about Malyen Oretsev? "Yes?"

"You let yourself be seen by Alina!"

The nervousness began to grow in her stomach. "What?"

"Today's morning she saw you in the beginning of the woods, looking at Kirigan's chambers. Is this true?"

Shit.

"I... I, ehm—"

"Damn it, Katherine!"

"I didn't know she was there! I was focused on a more important task!"

Michelle grabs her cousin's shoulders to make her look straight at her. "She's sure Ms. Anya isn't dead, and now I think Genya suspects that too."

The older woman shrugs as an attempt to exhale confidence in order to calm the blond down. "They don't know much, Michelle. I am sure it will do us no harm."

"You were supposed to be the responsible one who fret about things that go out of control, not me!" She lets go of the brunette and crosses her arms, a pout forming on her red lips. "I didn't enjoy this."

"Well, welcome to my life.”

"It sucks."

"I know." Katherine sighs and slowly approaches her frustrated cousin. "But I also know that you wouldn't call my shadows only to yell at me. What happened?"

Her blue eyes face the light green ones. "I have a plan that may work."

"About?"

"Agatha." She passes a hand through her long blond strands, a habit that she does when is restless. "There is someone that may trigger some of her memories, and, maybe, even help with the spell."

"That is wonderful news!"

"Yeah, but not for you."

She raises an eyebrow. "And why is that?"

The water singer looks away, averting her cousin's gaze. "I just want to know that this is the best for Agatha. I would never do anything that could harm her."

If Kathreine wasn't sure why the French woman was acting like that, now she knows: Michelle did the idea before consulting her, the brain of the family and the mastermind behind the plans. "Michelle—"

"And, maybe, I-I've become a little anxious because I haven't found Hope and it was taking too long for you to arrive."

She clenches her teeth, already predicting the enormous trouble she got themselves into. "Michelle—"

"So I took the matter in my own hands before consulting any of you and sent a letter to her."

"Michelle, who did you call?"

She gives her a nervous smile. "The brightest person in this world."

The shadow singer frowns, though her stomach is currently twisting in dread, since it seems that this someone could be a horrible person. "Who?"

"She is just so full of light, you know." Despite continuing to smile, the younger one  begins to hug herself, as if this would protect her from Katherine's reaction.

The realization sinks at the brunette's chest like an anchor. Soliel Alvarez is a light singer witch that was Agatha's paramour for half a century. She is a woman obsessed with power and very practical: get in her way and you will die. For her, time is precious, so, unless it's necessary, she doesn't waste time with torture ceremonies.

Beyond hating shadow singers for their ability to dim her glow, she also hates her own kind. According to her, light singers are people devoid of character and who do not deserve trust or loyalty. For these reasons, she feels no remorse when draining an equal; in fact, she takes satisfaction in seeing their despair as she senses the victim's power entering her veins and thus making her stronger.

For sharing the same thought as her about lightscums, Katherine doesn't hate Soliel, however, she is always careful towards the woman. After all, light singers aren't trustable. The adopted Mikaelson relationship with her is tense, and only Levi knows that his cousin slightly likes Agatha's ex-lover.

Soliel is a difficult person to deal with, someone that will always try to trick you if you aren't aware of her true nature. In other words, she is a brutalest version of the shadow singer, and Katherine isn't in her right mind to meet her. She is already worried with Agatha's cure, about her affair — is that what they have now? — with Kirigan, with Ravka's Supernatural's current situation and with the execution of the coup. Soliel here will only overwhelm her and worsen the emotional weariness she is still feeling.

"You didn't."

Michelle looks at the ground as if it was the most mesmerizing thing in life. "Her and Agatha's relationship was so healthy and ended so well. They're still friends and see each other sometimes!"

The British woman can feel her breathing fasten. "Please tell me you are lying."

"And the book said that a good ex-lover can help on triggering memories, so—"

"Oh, Michelle!"

"—Soliel's coming to Ravka."

Everything stops. The air in her lungs, the frustration, the racing thoughts in her mind and the nervous twisting in her stomach are all gone. Suddenly, the forces in her entire body disappear too. Soon, her clear vision is replaced by the dark and she falls on the floor.

[petalsplayplace]

Hello again pants in peril Petal,

Would you answer these in order? I'm curious if the first answer is swayed by the others?

🌟- You did a great job today! How would you most like to be rewarded?

☀️- You light up every room you're in! What do you think is your best feature?

🌻- It's a beautiful spring day and you've got the whole thing to yourself! What are you doing to make your little heart happy?

🤞- You're wishing and hoping for something! What is it?

😇- You may look innocent on the outside, but something tells me you've got a naughty streak. What kinds of funishment do you like?

😳- It's time for you to be regressed! How do you want it to happen? Fast? Forced? Magically? Slowly? Covertly? Hypnotically?

💕- Love is in the air! Tell us what you love about your CG/partner(s), or what you most desire in a CG/partner.

🌟- You did a great job today! How would you most like to be rewarded?

🌟- Ummm.. I really really really like gold stars an candies for rewards when am good... they're super good motivation!!! So umm prolly that???

☀️- Already said my boobies bu I guess should say something else... umm... oh!!! I have a super duper cute face!!! People tell me I'm cute lots so that!!!

🌻- So like do I have the whole day to myself like totally??? Like nobody around at all except those I want??? Cause if that's the case then am getting dressed in diapies and a onesie with shortalls or overalls and going outside!!! Gonna blow bubbles and run around and play and get all dirty so that I hafta take a bath once i get cold and wanna go back inside. Then after bath time would colour an play tea party with my stuffies (with real tea cause am prolly supervised) an then it'd prolly be late so would like snuggle up with a blankie in jus my onesie an diapie an watch cartoons or princess movies until bedtime :3

🤞- Ummm prolly to be kidnapped and kept as a baby for someone forever an ever an ever 🫣🫣🫣 cause like that's Mt biggest dream ever... jus being kept and losing all my adult privileges an being totally helpless at the hands of someone wanting to regress me totally...

😇- Ummm I said spankings already but umm... lemme think... umm... oh oh oh!!! Being bound and gagged!!! Is the bestest kind of time out!!! An because I get so hyper an talk lots an lots an lots an lots an lots an lots then it's prolly a good idea for you hehehehe 🤭🤭🤭🤭

😳- Oh gosh!!! Ummm... lemme see... I think I'd want it like slow-ish... not all at once... like little baby steps of slowly over time taking away my adult privileges and abilities until I become more and more dependent until its impossible for me to ever go back... and like I want it from like hypno or conditioning or gaslighting or stuff... I like it to be realistic in my daydreams cause then it might one day happen... 🫣🫣🫣

💕- so like def someone who takes like control an takes charge an like decides for me ya know??? Like someone who's not afraid to trick me into being a good little girl for them!!! An always condescending an over protective... an umm yeah... oh also also has to like umm be super ok with me being like dumb... cause am super duper dumb...

☀️- oh gosh um.... I think I'd really really like to be rewarded with umm... ummm... I dunno... wha do you guys think is a good reward for me???

[boyakishantriage]

The ship shook violently, as I suddenly became aware of the searing pain across my chest, a headache soon filled my mind as it went into overdrive and then. Calm. As I always did, I checked my body. Nothing broken, just a couple of ribs. Blood streamed down my ears, as I quickly figured what happened.

We'd been hit, a laser striking the side of the vessel causing it to crash... The sound of wind whistling its way down the halls, we had 32 crew. 9 humans including myself in that 32...

A hand reached for a needle, with pins coursing through her body as it began to freeze up. Pushing past the function, she stabbed herself with the EpiPen.

Blood flushed through her system, as everything ran into overdrive. Heart pounding, she forced herself to slow down as she staggered her way down the hall. Gripping her diaphragm as she leaned into a door with her bag of drugs.

Sam lay on the bed, frozen as he processed what just happened. Then pain in his leg, as a bag was thrown into him.

"oi. Dick sucker, go wake up the others. I'm gonna. Fucking. I'm gonna go close the fucking hole." He barely managed to mumble his thanks as she walked out.

BZZT. BZZZT. BZZT.

Her sister called her stupid. Bringing a bag of EpiPens, a small fusion reactor and some bits and bobs of tech. Wearing a face mask, she fused the metal together, every so often swearing as she walked up and down covering the holes with spare doors, plates, panels. Anything that wouldn't let out oxygen when they got off the ground. Which would probably take weeks, then something caught her ear.

Something coughed, tall and lanky with a dark deer complexion, the engineer of the ship swore as he dragged himself towards the engine room.

"Uhh. What?"

"engine. Explode. Gotta. Off."

The man thing lost his strength, legs probably broken I shrugged and opened the door.

I dragged the deer man into the med bay, dragging the delirious doctor with me as I threw him into a pod. Bacta tanks, suspend the person and healing liquid helps relax the body speeding up healing. Shoving a strawberry into his mouth, the girl woke up. Spitting the strawberry like a pepper, because that's what it was in her biology.

"GAH. WHAT?" She turned to look at me, as I burped.

"I'm going into a tank. You need to turn it on before the adrenaline wears off. Ok?" I helped myself into the tank, as everything went dark.

The shadow realm. A place of darkness and evil, a well of black magic. Figures move around me as I stand over Tartarus. The deepest part of the pit, linked up to here and comes to what can only be described as a pit of tar. Tying my hair back, slitting my wrists I dive down.

"MOTHER FUCKER." I shouted in reflex, spitting out phlegm as the captain looks at me.

"... What?"

"we crashed."

"I mean. Yeah."

"but we're not dead."

"That can happen."

"... And our communicators are out."

The orc like woman took a seat. Probably having a breakdown. The slime nurse woman looked at me.

"she's uh. Been doing that for a while now."

"how many people injured right now?"

"like lethal? Uhhh. 1, but they're. Well."

He closed the tube, turning the machine on.

BOOM

I flinched, reaching for my knife as he paused.

"oh right. We need the engine for power but we. Uh. Couldn't do it without breaking it, so..."

"... I get it. But damn."

I turned to the captain, her head in hands as she appeared to be breaking down.

"so. I'm just gonna..."

I reached forward, taking her card.

I wandered the ship, soon finding a group appearing unsure what to do.

"Good morning."

"... Ah. Human Eleanor..."

He trailed off, the goblin like alien losing his train of thought as I looked around.

"Alright. Fuck this. Warg. Hey. WARG."

The goblin snapped to attention.

"yes?"

"Can you clean up the halls?"

"i- the ship."

"WARG. Stop thinking, clean the halls. We can't have more accidents, so make sure we can walk through the halls without getting hurt."

The goblin hesitated, pausing as he nodded.

"clean the halls."

"RI-RI HEY. YO. YOU AWAKE?"

I jostled the chef awake, the squid cousin to Dina the doctor snapping awake.

"uh- what?"

"how much food we got?"

"I- err."

"how long can we last with the food and water we have?"

"umm. Eight months? But-"

"ok. And if we ration it?"

"... Half a year?"

"great. Can you preserve what we have, make it last longer and organise the kitchen?"

"but-"

"Stop thinking about it, your job now is preserve and organise ok?"

I met Sam and John, the pair arguing as they always did.

"OI. DICK SUCKERS. GET OUT THE SHIP, RUN ANALYSIS AND FORM A PERIMETER AROUND US. BUILD A CAMPSITE!"

The gays looked at me, each other before shrugging and moving off.

It took three hours, three hours of organising and sending people to do things, at some point I'd handed out radios for people to call where they where, who they were and whatever they wanted to say. Most of the aliens were in a daze, with the other seven humans either trying to figure something out or arguing on what to do.

"Anthony. Find Wargo and figure out how to fix this ship. Liam, quit your bitching and go make a farm or something. Pashi, go with Tina and get everyone in the right headspace. Here's a radio, get them into the cafeteria. Saw, go out and help John and Sam. Onion, come with me to the cafeteria."

The others broke off, as the captain began gaining her senses.

"the ship-

"Shut up. We're going to the cafeteria."

[mediocreshake08]

15 lines game bitcheeeeeeees-

Rules: Share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture their character/personality/vibe. Bonus points for just using the dialogue without other details about the scene, but you’re free to include those as well. | tagged by the wounderful @cyberneticsanguinaire

My favourite lines for Red Robin in Smoke Screen and Requiem Mirror

1. (whispering) "Do you ever go to sleep?"

2. "You know, we could settle this over some coffee, if you'd want! I know this cute little coffee shop back home, I could treat you if we get outta here!"

3. "Ya know, for someone who control's ice, I figured you'd be more „chill“ about this."

4. "You too, blood-bitch. Whoops, recycled jokes!"

5. "Yeah, I'm fine, don't worry. I got a plan..."

6. "Yeah, well, sometimes the lines between hero and villain get a bit blurry."

7. "I am, I'm just... not used to any of this is all."

8. "26! One of the guys was crushed by sum' rubble, saw it myself!"

9. (giggling) "Maybe I'm just a mysterious guy."

10. "you wanna know a secret? I'm not so sure about these people, myself. I'm not one for crowds. You wanna know why I came along? Its because I was hoping I could find a place I can belong. A family, since mine is lost to me. So, I'm gonna tell you this: I can understand how you're feeling. And we all need a friend or two."

11. "Ran straight into that one, huh?"

12. "Trust me, I'm already on thin ice with her. I don't need more reasons for her to chew me out."

13. "Pop quiz, knives or magic? ... I think you and i'll get along just fine."

14. "You're hardly intimidating snow cone."

15. "After I win, you wanna get Sabarro's? ... thats one bet you're gonna lose."

Tagging: @thedragonholder @bi-force-1 @ash-shark and anyone else interested

[februaryberries]

the rest of my reaction to the rest of the episodes because i can’t be bothered to split them up

JIMS HOT CHOCOLATE JIMS MUG

she’s so cute im gonna cry

she’s so cute and they’re so like hdjshfjdbf

SHES SO SWEET

DONT HESITATE TO ASK ANY OTHER QUESTIONS YOU HAVE ABOUT LOVE INSPECTOR CONSTABLE

i feel so bad for nina :(

OH MY GOD HE JOURNALS

aziraphale fuckin writing in a journal kicking his legs like a teenage girl

aziraphale sweetie you’re so brainwashed

OH MY GOD HE MADE IT YELLOW

oooooo i love the bentley driving into the intro art that’s so cool

he’s so obsessed w the rain moment

im so obsessed w ziras diary it’s so funny

now zira that was petty and bad

zira NOOOOOO

oh poor zira he’s so sad

he’s so cute in his little detective costume

THE SKINNY LOWDOWN HES SO SOLLY

gimme the FACTS

well yeah mason hmmmm

im so worried about this girl i feel like this is going to end badly

they’re gonna die

i knew something would go wrong

rip those guys

NO SHE DIED??????? FUCK

he’s insane crowley insane

HES SO TINY

im small arent i

GIANR ROWLEY?????

where are you

GRINDR LMAO

the awning moment

ooooof

VERY CLOSED LOL

it’s always too late :((((

PH MY GOD IS HE IN THE HITCHHIKER

who is she

YOU DONT SEEM HIS TYPE ????? IM SORRY!?????

WHAT HAT WHAT I HEARD YOU AND CROWLEY WERE AN ITEM IM FUCKING SCREAMING

furfur WHO

OH MY GOS OH MY GOD OH MY GOD ITS LIKE I HOPED BUT I COULDNT LET MYSELF BELIEVE THEYD ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING SJFJSJCJJSKSZKJDJ OKAY WAIT OKAY IM NOT POSTING THIS UNTIL I FINISH IT NOW IN CASE IM WRONG LOL

Im sorry is it literally raining hearts when zira and crowley are sitting on the roof in the intro are u kidding me

NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY NOT US GETTING 1941 RIGHT AFTER THEY YOURE AN ITEM COMMENT ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME RN IM GONNA THROW UP

the music

who tf is that guy in the church how is he awake alive whatever

is he flirting is that flirting

oh thank you crowley is there anything i can do for you in return *bats eyelashes* LMAO

ooooo

SISSY TYPE

EW THAT TONGUE WAS SO UNNECESSARY

oh no not magic he’s so silly

nice exactly what nazis deserve

ZOMBIES????

no this poor old man also how did he not see them LMAO

That’s what …… f r i e n d s are for LMAOOOO

CROWLEYS OLD MAN IMPRESSION IS SO FUNNY

he’s so supportive look ziras so happy

SOMEONE YOU REALLY TRUST OH MY GOD

ZIRAS SO EXCITED AW oh rip the magic shop guy

im so scared for aziraphale oh god i don’t know if i can watch

he’s so baby

THE BEES KNEES

JIGGERY POKERY

OH NO MIRACLES BLOCKED OH FUCK

oh no

evidence envelope LMAO

im so nervous but i know it’s going to work H

he’s so whimsy

OH HE DID A MAGIC TRICK W THE PHOTO DIDNT HE

BRILLIANT AZIRAPHALE IF U DID WHAT I THINK U DID

Lmao get fucked nazis

YES ZIRA I KNEW IT

oh my god im gonna throw up

they’re so sweet

SHADES OF GREY

im so

CROWLEYS PET????

TJE BULLET HOLE STUCKERS THRE STICKERS

oh no are the demons gonna crash his night

HES GIVING AWAY BOOKS

NO WAY DAVID PUTTING ON THE FEZ I SEE YOU AS HE ALSO MENTIONED THE DR WHO BOOK ARE U KIDDING I FUCKIN SEE YOU

THE FEZ LMAOO

HER ARMOR LMAOOOO

this is so awkward lmao

OH FOFO FURFUR WHATEVER HIS MAME IS

Zira please stop speaking french

YOUVE BEEN TOGETHER LONG IM KILLING MTSELF IM THROWING UP

HES NOT MY BIT ON THE SIDE

other peoples love lives always seem more straightforward than our own AND HE WALKS AWAY HE DIDNT KNOW IM HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WAHHHH

Im losing my mind oh god the season finale is after this episode im going to throw up

WHAT IS THIS

SMITTEN IM SORRY ???

this isn’t going to end well

okay but the way they do the texts from Lindsey is so cool

my only friend

OH NO HES SO SAD

CROWLEY WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU

oh thank god

crowley OH ITS IN THE MATCHBOX

DO YOU WANT A HOT CHOCOLATE CROWLEY AWEWW IM GONNA DIE

Oh sweet girl

nobody would believe you anyway :( WAIT AND SEE LMAO

So beautiful

OH NO MAGGIE

A SEASMSTRESS

ZIRA U CANT FORCE PPL TO FEEL THINGS

he’s so worried :((( crowley

HES ASKING HIM TO DANCE ??????? IM SORRY ARE THEY GOING TO DANCE

jim :((( a

THE FUR COAT LMAO

TOSTE

oh rip the annoying guy LOL

i won’t leave you on your own maggie :(

BUT RESCUING ME MAKES HIM SO HAPPY????????? IM SORRY EXCUSE ME WHAT

YOU SAID BLAH BLAH BLAH

WHY IS CROWLEY GOING TO HEAVE THOUGH

LAST EPISODE IM GOING TO DIE

his little prance

MAGGIE NO

man that one demon can’t catch a break

HIS LITTLE HAPPY WALK LOL

crowleys emotional support angel

CROWLEY YOUR MEMORY

are gabriel and beelzebub going on dates these look like dates LMAO

SHE GAVE HIM THE FLY ????

WAIT ACTUALLY I DIDNT THINK I WAS RIGHT OH MY GOD

HES SUGGESTING ALPHA CENTURI FOR THEM AND ITS LIKE BUT THATS WHERE HE WAS GOING TO TAKE AZIRAPHALE

it’s a crime that gabriel and beelzebub are getting together before crowley and zira THEY DID IT FIRST

us time

he’s tidying up the shop :(((( and waiting for zira

im gonna throw up im gonna throw up oh no what is azira going to say what did matatrom say oh no

NO CROWLEY WAS ABOUT TO CONFESS IM GONNA THROW UP

oh no but he doesn’t want oh no

oh zira sweetie

NO IM GONNA THROW UP IM GONNA CRY

NO IM NO

im NO

THIS ISNT WHAT I MEANT WHEN I SAID MAKE THEM KISS WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WTH YOU THIS ISNT WGAT I MEANT THIS ISNT WHAT I MEANT IM GONNA THROW UP WHAT DO TOU MEAN IM GONNA FUCKINGDYE IM SOBBING ZIRA NOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOO ZIRA WHAT HAVE YOU DONE ZIRA NOOOOOOOOO

WHAT THE FUCK THIS ISNT WHAT I MEANT

how am i ever ever ever ever supposed to recover from this the way they both wanted the other to come with them but zira is too brainwashed by heaven still and it’s heart breaking and the way crowley kisses him because he thinks he’s never gonna have the chance now the NO NIGHTINGALE GALES we could have ben US zira being so heartbroken by the kiss I FORGIVE YOU don’t bother what if i eat my entire laptop right now

The way he tenderly touches his lips afterwards is Gut Wrenching and then he’s about to say he thinks he’s made a mistake and then you see him pack those feelings away in a box and shove them deep down and what if i died right now

[oneircsarchive]

[ UPDATE ]:     a letter that updates the recipient on the writer’s life, or certain on-going events that are happening in their life. ( theo + daphne )

                                                        Caisteal Inbhir Nis, Inverness, Scottish Highlands.

                                                                                      Thursday, 20 of July, 1995.

Dear Miss Greengrass Daphne,

I miss you. I hope this letter finds you well. I also hope you are enjoying your stay at your grandparents tremendously – as you always do.

I am to say that, this summer, Inbhir Nis is more unbearable than ever. The Ancestral Seat of House Nott remains unchanged, as does the city where it stands (the ever tiresome Inverness), but its atmosphere of unique boredom and stillness has been disturbed. Even the elfs fear everytime someone uses the fireplace, even if without reason, for the ward spells that guard the Manor are older than, perhaps, even the Hohenzollern (or what is left of them).

The few wizards who do live here, faithful vassals of my family, spend their days nose-buried in either ancient magic books or brewing potions that, while make me deadly curious, I do not dare ask its intent. I am sure you would not refrain yourself from asking, and, by now, would already know the entirety of whatever it is that they plot (they do seem to be preparing for a war and… I am not sure I do want to have such worries confirmed) and probably leading them – or destroying them. I caught myself laughing thinking of you throwing all your perfect polite insults (maybe the Greek ones, as well) at old Mr. Macdowell, a rather uncharming man who, on his better days, reminds me greatly of Filch. Would you come back early and stay here?

My father is rarely home, as it seems he have suddenly taken great interest in abusing his power at the Ministry, something I am sure Mr. Malfoy has put him up to. Speaking of which, Draco has gone to some sort of “Summer Camp” in Scandinavia – when he explained it to me it sounded more like a forced labour camp, so I profoundly and sadly (of course) refused his proposal to accompany him. I am almost regretting it, for now I found myself terribly alone.

Now, you are the one probably laughing. I know you will go and write back “Oh, Theodore Nott feeling lonely? Since when does he care for companionship?” and, believe me, I rather enjoy my own companion and the solitude and quietness that it brings – but I think I can admit that I also enjoy showing that I am much superior to all of you, my dear friends. You, the dearest of them.

Friends. Doesn’t it make me sound like such a popular and well-connected lad? But it's farce it's revealed as, with you in Greece, Draco in some icy country and Blaise away, vacationing at his newest stepfather’s summer house in Spain, I see myself completely and utterly alone and missing you terribly. I almost, see, almost, sended a letter to Parkinson two days ago, when I thought I was gonna lose my voice completely if I didn’t used it once more, asking if she would like to meet and discuss the departure of her dear boyfriend – I figured, a moment later, that I would rather be speechless.

And, of course, it would be rather impolite and cause a whole fuss at Society. Can you imagine if Mrs. Macmillan heard of it? The accusations of being courting Parkinson would not anger Draco (have you ever seen someone less jealous of a girlfriend?) surely, but my reputation would never recover.

I realise, only now, that you asked, in your previous letter, how I was spending my days, not how I was coping with turning into a bitter old man. So, forgive all this gibberish and let me answer you at once.

I wake up and you’re the first thing I think of, weirdly enough very late. I break my fast alone wondering if you’re doing the same, sometimes with my father when he is around. And I then read a lot, in fact, I am sure I could usurp Snape’s place as Master of Potion in two-weeks time, if I keep up with my current reading schedule. I have tea and this reminds me that in a few more months you will be tormenting me to join you for tea at Hogwarts, and practice on, guess what, my newest broom, which is the most beautiful thing in the world after you. And then I go to sleep.

You also asked if I would like a book of your grandfather and, yes, I would like very much so and the Greek will not be a problem, as you know I have been studying it intensely since Christmas’s Break. Thank him profusely for accepting on lending it – and thank you as well!

But, now, how are you doing? How is Greece? Would you care to send me a picture? The sun doesn’t agree with me as it does with you, surely, but I do hope to visit Athens at least once in my life, before I perish on these rainy lands.

I will stop being dramatic.

Answer me quickly as you can, I long to know of you or anything for that matter.

Ever your faithful friend,

Theodore C. Nott Jr.

[three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat]

During a battle at Zora's domain, Sidon gets injured protecting Mipha

For day five, "that's gonna scar"

It was raining in Zora's Domain. It always seemed to be raining, bringing unpleasant memories with the dark clouds. Sidon thought this battle would add more– the ground was as slick with blood as it was rain, and they had suffered far too many casualties even with Mipha’s healing powers. 

Link had offered his help, but they had declined; reports had indicated it was only a small horde of monsters headed towards the Domain. He regretted refusing the offer– while his Link was strong and tended to come up with more… creative solutions, this one could have easily tipped the scales in their favor.

(It was something he and the others had resolved to never let him know– Link struggled with his past enough, and letting him know how much he had weakened would only do him harm.)

A roar shook the trees, and a lynel galloped into the clearing. 

"Let me handle this." Sidon said. 

Mipha looked up uncertainly. "Are you sure?"

"There's no need to worry."

"I–" The soldier she was healing groaned, and her gaze turned back to him. "Very well. Be careful."

"Of course." He said, giving her a reassuring smile. The lynel beat its shield as Sidon stood to face it. 

The fight was brutal; for all his skills had grown, even taking on a lynel by himself was a stretch. They both backed away from each other after a few minutes, circling each other warily. Sidon took a deep breath, adjusting his grip on his tridents. 

The lynel scanned the clearing, and its beady gaze fell upon Mipha. It grinned, a horrible thing, and rushed towards her, seeming to think she was the weak link among them, sword raised high.

Time seemed to slow down; Sidon's heartbeat echoed in his ears, each thump seeming minutes apart, the only thought in his head an urgent call of protect Mipha.

In one swift motion, he rushed forward, and met the lynel's sword on his crossed tridents. It pressed down with all its strength, and his arms trembled with the effort of keeping the sword away. He bared his teeth in a snarl, and pushed away the lynel's sword; it skidded down his tridents with an ear grating ring, tearing a deep gash in his arm.

He took advantage of the opening it presented, ignoring the pain, and stabbed one trident into its throat, the other in its torso. It crumpled to the ground, letting out a dying roar, flames flickering out of its mouth weakly. 

"Sidon!" Mipha shouted, rushing to his side. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, sister." He waved her away. 

She scanned him for injuries, eyes narrowing when they landed on his arm. "I think not. You'll let me heal that, now."

"Sister, there's–"

"This is not an argument, Sidon!" She snapped, and took a deep breath, calming herself. "At the very least, allow me to seal it. You are losing blood far too fast."

"Very well." He said meekly. An angry Mipha was a formidable force, and he didn't wish to face her wrath. 

She sent him a sharp look. "Don't think I'll forget this. You will come to me and let me heal you after the battle."

---------

“I’m afraid this is going to scar.” Mipha said, the warm glow of her healing magic surrounding his arm. The battle had continued for a few more hours, and the sun was just beginning to shred its light on the Domain. “I do wish you hadn’t done that; I am quite capable of protecting myself.”

“And I am quite capable of protecting both of us, sister. It was mere bad luck.”

She sighed. “I am your older sister. You should not have to worry about such things.”

“I could not just stand by and allow you to be hurt, Mipha.”

“And I could not forgive myself if you were hurt protecting me.” 

He chuckled softly. "It appears we are at a stalemate, then." 

"I don't think so." She shook her head. "I cannot stop you from fighting, but Sidon, please. Do not let yourself get hurt protecting me."

"We both know it would have killed you, sister." He said quietly. "And you are far more important than I."

Her head shot up, and she stared at him, startled. "What? Who told you that?"

"No one. But you are Vah Ruta's pilot, one of Hyrule’s champions." He shrugged. "I am… no one."

She grabbed his hands, squeezing them tightly. "Don't say that, Sidon. You are not no one. If you don't believe that you are important to me, then what about your people?"

"What do you mean?"

"I am not a fool, Sidon." She smiled sadly. "I know I'm not alive in your time anymore. That makes you the heir."

“Father will live a long time yet.” 

“But can he lose another child?” He stayed silent. “Please, Sidon. You are lucky it’s only a scar this time. Next time it could be far worse.”

“Very well.” He said with some difficulty. “I will not… do that again.” 

He would. He would do it again, and again, and again, do whatever it took to make sure Mipha got the future that was stolen from her.

-------

He looked up at the statue, the corded knot of scar tissue warm under his fingers. “I did my best, sister. I… wish I could have protected you here as well.”

A hand poked his side, and he looked down at Link in surprise. “Ah, my friend! I did not hear you approach!”

“You’re crying.” He said bluntly. “What’s wrong?”

He blinked, and brought a hand up to his face. “Indeed, I am… My apologies.”

“Is this about Mipha?”

“Ah… I believe Riju told you of our journey to the past?” He nodded. “I was just… thinking about her. Some version of myself will be able to grow up with her, and… I suppose that is the best I can hope for.”

“She’s proud of you.”

“What?”

“She told me.” He looked away for a moment. “She’s proud of the person you’ve become, and she wants you to be happy. You couldn’t have done anything then, you were just a little kid.”

“I…” 

"She loves you and wants you to be happy. Don't waste your life on a time already gone by."

He dropped to one knee, and wrapped his arms around Link tightly. He awkwardly patted Sidon on the back. 

“Thank you.” He whispered. “That… means more to me than you will ever know.”

[mtnkat3]

8.47pm

Sigh.. what a day.. all I can think about.. all that has given me any peace & smiles today.. an old truck bench seat & slidin into my loves .. sides.. just listening to music together & enjoying us. Also was thinking about my writings. It helped.

Basically.. I was on the phone, not able to get all my morning meds. Again. Wh not leaving me alone. Kept harassing me with msgnr. Food. Over & over. So missed getting to endo bloodwork before satellite lab closed. So I have to drive twice the distance, into busier area because his stomach was more important. I've been pretty mad today. I was able to sit for a bit at 5pm & just rock & do my senses. I think got ½~1hr rest of my eyes. But my dang neck. Don't think I'd call these power naps. Sigh. My guts have been rumbling because of that, & the issues with ins/cobra. So.. I have been barely holding on today. Begging God to end my soul's torture. All I know.. I'm tired. Of fighting against my health to get away from a monster that just sees me as a housekeeper. [Use a nicer word there.🤨] But I won't give up getting away from him. Ever. He can fight to keep his version of free labor. But he has until 11.15.22. Or go to jail. Knowing him, he'll try & wait to 5pm that day. But I will have my freedom from his tyranny. And pray to get my life back on track by doing so. And getting my health back. I am so tired of not being able to enjoy fresh food that I nurtured & helped grow. I so enjoy watching the tomatoes budding still! Oh! & my mandevilla still has buds coming in! I've got them all on a cart & roll them into the garage. Sigh. More tasks. Get my outdoor cats beds fixed to keep them snug & warm in the garage at night.

Anyways.. that's today.. Gonna try & get to bed earlier tonight. Hope that means before midnight! Lol! But thinking about my soul's mates .. & writings.. & whatever the truths of the whys actually are. .. just.. love me... for me.. please...??? As I love you.. no expectations. Just.. I wanna build .. with my soul's mates.. whatever makes us happy. Whatever God wants us to do. Yes, I have goals, aspirations, dreams. But without my soul's mates .. they are not the same. Just as going to the movies or travelling alone.. not having .. you .. to share it with.. just isn't the same. Yes, I can build my cabins & businesses & dreams alone. But .. just.. sad. I can fulfill some of the goals God has given me. But without my helpmate.. loses its meaning.. Life's rather gray without my soul's loves .. oh how I miss you.. it rips at me daily.

I'm so angry with myself for not forcing this hell ended in 2013. I keep reminding myself.. God has His Reasons, & lessons I needed to learn. And yeah, I've grown a lot since then. Heck, I started this last successful 🙏atty 10/19. He fought & has delayed since agreement 4.14.22. Anyways.. I refuse to die here! Or listen to a tone deaf jerk mutilate magic man/heart🎶 while I drive back here tonight! Thought my ears were gonna start bleeding!🙄🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️ Deep breath. Time to find new laptop & trailers need. Gotta spend money I shouldn't have to. Gr. But watching mysteries of the abandoned reminds me.. can't take it with me. And this will help me get away from someone that need tie a honey around its neck & see if bears will eat it! Or would bears cringe at swipe those claws across & leave it for only jackals & carrion birds.. 🤔 naughty cheeky wicked kat grin. Ok.. research time. As I think about the future.. As I think about.. everything. As I miss.. you. Whoever the heck you are! Wherever the flippin .. gr! You are! Sigh. I love you. God.. help me.. please...???

I will never give up. I stand on my cliffside as I work. As I await. Even if its Forever.

~True love never dies & true love always waits.~

Your humbled bowed warrior queen daughter.

Patience daughter. Yes Father.

~Tijgeress kat Phoenix. 🌺

👩🤓⚓🙏🙇‍♀️☔💡🌂🔗⛓🧰⚙⚒🛠⚔⚖🗽🦅🐯🐾🐐🦉🐢🐛🦋🌱🌺🌹🌻🌷🌳🧶🧵 🥧🍁🧣🥾🥤🍋🥮🍯🍼☕🍫🍎🍑🍒 ⌚🚀⚡🌠🗝🔱⚜🐻🦌💝🧩♠️♾🎯🧭🕯🎶💋

Th.10.20.2022 9.58pm est. Ibs sucks.😳🙈